World Cup 95 Roleplay Thread

by **Tumbra** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 2:09 am

Tumbra 1–0 Pyazhnaya

TMB (4-2-3-1): 1 - V Jones; 25 - S Kemp, 4 - I Ashburn (24 - Y Lawson, 81'), 20 - C Whitfield, 19 - J Green (3 - T Mercurio, 75'); 6 - T Harrison, 8 - V Hicks (16 - I Robertson, 81'), 23 - S Monaghan; 7 - V Wells, 9 - L Crossley (21 - A Pearson, 67'); 11 - N Riordan (26 - E Maddison, 75')

TMB scorers: Valerie Wells (25')

Player of the Match: Valerie Wells [TMB]

Gnejs 4–4 Tumbra

TMB (4-2-3-1): 12 - R Russell; 2 - A Renton (25 - S Kemp, 82'), 20 - C Whitfield, 24 - Y Lawson, 3 - T Mercurio (19 - J Green, 82'); 6 - T Harrison, 34 - S Cho, 8 - V Hicks (23 - S Monaghan, 70'); 17 - R Haines (7 - V Wells, 70'), 21 - A Pearson; 26 - E Maddison (11 - N Riordan, 45')

TMB scorers: Edward Maddison (11', 19'), Audrey Pearson (38'), Sandra Cho (90' + 2')

Player of the Match: Audrey Pearson [TMB]

Aurora TV causes backlash after plans to raise price for World Cup streaming package by a third

STRATON: As World Cup season draws close, attention has been put back on the TV rights package of the World Cup, a lucrative revenue-bringer for most media companies in Tumbra. But Aurora, the country's biggest cable television company, has drawn furore after it announced its plan to broadcast 54 of the tournament's 64 games exclusively on its platform, for a price increase from $98 to $129. The Capnordic Chief Executive Officer of Aurora Media, Jacques Delperière, responding to media enquiries, said that "The increased price of Aurora's offerings for the tournament reflect the increased number of matches to be broadcast on the platform — at World Cup 94, we broadcast 45 of the 64 games at that tournament, and now we're adding ten additional games to the lineup for our viewers to watch."

The ten games not broadcast by Aurora will be those primarily starring Tumbra; namely, those will be the first match of the World Cup, Tumbra's three group stage games, Tumbra's second-round and quarter-final matches, as well as both semi-finals, the final, and the third-placed playoff are all safeguarded by law to be broadcast for free by the publicly-funded Tumbran Broadcasting Corporation (TBC). The move to increase prices apparently came after Aurora outbid competing media companies for the rights to broadcast the 54 matches after "an increase in the amount stated in the bid book for the package which we are not, at the current time, at liberty to disclose," as paraphrased from Delperière's statement.

The backlash to the announcement was swift and severe; trending on the various social media networks which populate cyberspace was a unanimous roar of upheaval. "We're paying an additional $30 for games that we're not even sure we can watch live — who can watch two games at once apart from the most dedicated of us who wish to live broadcast the scores to a random Discord server?" said @mike.oxlong on cica.da, the Dantopian shortform social media site. Players were also keen to wade in on the issue; Xanneria-based Neil Broadhead posted that "And the businessmen wonder why so many people pirate football these days; people aren't resources to be squeezed dry. $129 is an absolute travesty from @aurora.media and should be reversed, or at least, lowered."

The Tumbran Football Federation could not be reached for comment, either on the issue of broadcasting rights or on the matter of 18 gold bars being delivered to the headquarters of the Federation shortly after six a.m. on Thursday, less than 24 hours after the announcement of the price increase.

by **Squornshelan Remnant States** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 2:17 am

Consecutive losses to Sajnur and Pasarga have likely scuttled Squornshelan qualification hopes despite having almost half their qualifying schedule still to play.
The Confederates appeared to have once again escaped with a 3-3 draw, only to be sunk by a late goal from Biró, unable to mount a successful attack to find another goal after twice erasing Pasargan leads earlier in the match. The Black-and-Reds now trail Pasarga by three points for second place while also surrendering both the goal difference and head-to-head tiebreakers to the Wanderers. Assuming Pasarga have no unforced errors the rest of the way, the Black-and-Reds would need to make up a nigh insurmountable eight point deficit to catch Sajnur over the five matchdays remaining.

So, the question is, exactly how unlikely, how restrictive is the scenario by which the Black-and-Reds might still sneak into a playoff spot.

First and foremost, they need to win out. Any further dropped points make this an impossibility. Fortunately, the SRS faces three bottom half teams, plus fourth-placed Maraonia over their next four matches. The bad news there is that there's a very real possibility that they may have to face a 13-0-0 Sajnur side in Damogran on the final matchday. If that turns out to be the case, you can most likely kiss qualification goodbye, though it will have meant another loss by Pasarga. The Wanderers face Sajnur next matchday in Torgos in a match that will be closely watched by Confederate fans. Should Pasarga win, they will have an essentially clear path toward a top-two finish, as they face the same four struggling sides over their final four matchdays that the SRS will face over their next four.

Should Pasarga lose however, and assuming an SRS win over the Salish Republic, that would put the Black-and-Reds and Wanderers back even on points, and bring Goal Difference into play. With both teams facing a number of lower-ranked sides, we might see some ugly scorelines down the stretch, as both teams will likely look to run up the score to improve their chance of winning the tiebreaker. Still, the most likely scenario seems to be that Sajnur's inexplicably good form will come to an end on their visit to Pasarga, leaving them still in first place, two points ahead of the Wanderers and five ahead of the Black-and-Reds. Assuming that the Confederacy would also be able to pull off a home victory over Sajnur on the final day in this case, that would still leave two points to be made up at some point in the interim. So, unfortunately dear readers, what seems the most likely scenario for the Black-and-Reds to qualify is for Sajnur, who have of course yet to drop a single point in this competition, to not only lose to by Pasarga and the SRS, but also one of the three matches in between, in which they will host Equestria and Maraonia, and travel to the Salish Republic.

Yeah, fat fucking chance.

SRS: 3
PAS: 4

Scoring:
SRS: Aaltonen 29', Sargsa 34', Fridtjofs 83'
PAS: Magana 9', 11', Fenyvesi 39', Biró 88'

SRS Lineup: Blaha; Drenel, Titov (Volam 90'), Van, Norling (Maksimov 90'); Sevet-Ibilx, Hashemi; Ksudach (Shakhnovich 85'), Avachinsky, Aaltonen; Sargsa (Fridtjofs 75')

SRS: 3
EQS: 0

Scoring:
SRS: Nedeljkovic 2', 13', Bondarov 9'
EQS: None

SRS Lineup: Blaha; Kamgang, Tirel (Yarlut 88'), Titov, Sauber; Saigir, Amjol (Bernat 71'); Bondarov (Nyberg 80'), Avachinsky, Ditou; Nedeljkovic (Eld 80')

Qualifying Schedule and Results

FRND: SRS 0–1 SYL @ Slavnareczpospolitastadion (cap. 61,230), Lublova, Molvania, SRS

MD01: SRS 3–3 PAS @ Vogsphere Arena (cap. 90,000), Vogsphere, Isle of Squornshelous, SRS
MD02: EQS 4–7 SRS @ TBA
MD03: SRS 4–0 SLR @ Zenith Stadium (cap. 58,400), Stavromula, Isle of Squornshelous, SRS
MD04: MAR 2–3 SRS @ TBA
MD05: SRS 1–0 CEN @ Raftel Park (cap. 59,870), Chalesm, Megabrantis, SRS
MD06: SRS 3–0 ATT @ Olympiastad (cap. 47,550), Arkintoofle, Megabrantis, SRS
MD07: SAJ 3–2 SRS @ National Stadium (cap. 102,000), Javoser, SAJ
MD08: PAS 4–3 SRS @ Stade de Torgos (cap. 90,000), Torgos, PAS
MD09: SRS 3–0 EQS @ Pheldagrif Stadium (cap. 45,620), Yassaca, Sivolia, SRS
MD10: SLR  v  SRS @ TBA
MD11: SRS  v  MAR @ Castle Street (cap. 57,300), Jaglan, Algolia, SRS
MD12: CEN  v  SRS @ TBA
MD13: ATT  v  SRS @ TBA
MD14: SRS  v  SAJ @ Albrechtsson Park (cap. 65,400), Damogran, Algolia, SRS

by **Independent Athletes from Quebec** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 2:26 am

Independent Athletes from Quebec (IAQ) - World Cup 95 Team
WINDOW 6 - v. Devonta

- Beginning of communication.

Please note that for the first half of this qualification window, due to the Foreign Office requirement that prohibits Quebecois nationals including dual-nationals, from travelling into nations placed under Level Four - Do Not Travel without sufficient, one-month quarantine measure, there will be no regular IAQ delegation present to play an anon nation for home-and-away legs of this World Cup 95 qualification cycle.

Instead, eleven prisoners dressed in rainbow kits will be playing as IAQ on those matches, first away and then at home in their designated home venue at an unnamed uranium mine, Ruland, Farfadillis. There will be no Quebecois fans issued visa for away trip, or away fans flying into the designated home venue.

End of communication. -

26-PLAYER ENTRY

Expected XI vs. Devonta (4-2-3-1): Goh Y.R.; Wilson-Didh - Kim G.S. - Salihamidzic - Watson-Lukwago; Bouck - Pyo S.H.; Tekaronhonte - Moussenguet - Woodcarver; Hamisi

GOALKEEPERS (3):
Goh Yeong-Rok (Kingston FC), Fabien Kalulu-Flaubert (La + Querida, FFD), Innes Sheppard (Urrheddiao, CMT)

DEFENDERS (8):
Esteban Flores (Lhor, CMT), Goh Hak-Seong (Herzegovina City FC, BNJ), Mariano Kang (Rulandea Kosta, FFD), Kim Gyeong-Seok (Swangard Athletic), Noel-Hercule McKinley (West Couno United, TMB), Sinisa Salihamidzic (Montreal Koreana), Donovan Watson-Lukwago (St. John's Arsenal), Brian Wilson-Didh (Santranginus, SRS)

MIDFIELDERS (7):
Mathinna Bouck (Rulandea Kosta, FFD), Pengsoo Brown (Lanar, CMT), Samuel McTavish (Lakewood City, TMB), Aurelien Mousseunguet (Urrhed FC, CMT), Juan Aurelio Redondo (Montreal Koreana), Pyo Seung-Hye (Avondale City, SYL), Otis Tekaronhonte (Eivora Athletic FC, TKT)

FORWARDS (8):
Billie Blue Hamisi (Urrheddiao, CMT), Kim Chae-Young (FC Inter Nantwich, TMB), Eloise Kweon (Sabrefell Moths, NPH), Corneille-Theophile Poulin (Avondale City, SYL), Amina Salihamidzic Beckie (Frenei Tor, CMT), Ruby Vanderley (Lanar, CMT), Zinaida Woodcarver (Crisibless, NPH)

Ahead By A Century

PART 6 - St. Petersburg

Claire Lundrigan did not respond to Heo Seung-Geon's text.

As a matter of fact, she did not even find out about the text until the morning after. While the sophomore had managed to make it on time, with her ceremonial rifle having cooled down after all this time she had worried about it all, Claire and her fellow volunteers would only be let known by a supervising member of staff that due to the unexpected shooting of one of their colleagues, who they would quickly find out from the murmurs by the already-aware alumni, that the ceremonies for the night would be postponed until tomorrow while the school authorities were still figuring out what had happened.

Maybe it's all going to be alright, was what was inside her mind, as she would find herself heading back into the Robinson Hall in a glimmer of hope. Moving effortlessly between the buildings' brick-laden walking paths, past the doors and then matching the steps, Claire would make her way back to her room, one place where she really felt safe in current times, and passed out, not to wake up until the noon the following day. The Heos have by then were well under the way to the train station for 14h train back to Joongyeong, and she was only able to say goodbye to Seung-Geon, a very brief encounter, at the station.

During the days immediately after the shooting, the Avon-Gillespie campus felt both grim and out of order. While Alexandre would eventually be hospitalised to the local ward, where he would stay a week before discharging with relatively little pain and even shorter recovery time, the news of the shooting had left enough problems for the school to handle. The presence of the Duke of Halifax, the father of Alexandre, had both meant that there would be both the swift response and a little bit more of cover-up. Local farmers and nearby registered hunters, as well as the school staff responsible for the team's armoury for the sport-shooting teams, were contacted, but to no success after brief crosschecking of evidences where the cartilages found nearby matched neither the ceremonial (there are loopholes, but we'll cover that later) nor the locals' weapons in possession.

This mismatch had ended up becoming saving grace for not only the school, but Claire as well, as neither Alexandre nor the Duke wanted to pursue the case any further. There were multiple factors in hand- one being that Alexandre, whose ego had dictated the mindset where there saw no need to make enemies with his own subjects, saw himself lucky and not seeking for vengeance. For Alexandre, there was no reason for someone to shoot him, even his faults were too apparent and well-documented as he had known as all this time, and it felt more for him as if the skies have come to punish him for lack of restraints. So a good wake-up call was what he had received. They were also mor than aware that this would not exactly be an ideal situation to relay some news back home, even more so when considering his mother's state trip abroad and his grandmother, that being Cassie II of Cassadaigua, undergoing slow but substantially-progressing dementia (Alexandre is second of many grandchildren by Cassie II, for those wondering). With those in mind, Alexandre and the Daemyeongoong Palace investigation would be swiftly closed, with the provision of additional security measures taken by the school to avoid possible incidents regarding firearms in the property.

The weeks that would follow the homecoming shooting incident were a quiet, but also buzzing one. The East Coast weather did not help, for one, with the leaves were rapidly changing from the cardinal red to that of marroon, before falling into the air, while it rained incessantly for much of next two weeks that would after the homecoming shooting incident. This meant that for much of the student population at Avon-Gillespie, this had meant staying comfortably inside or well out into the woods. As in that they would either be embracing this opportunity to stay inside their house and enjoy their time by the fireside offered by the floor common rooms or in some older lodges, individual rooms; or spend much of their time trying to fulfill their physical education requirement of the team's age-old curriculum by spending more time into the rainy, foggy forests and the hills of the Avon County. Warm socks and additional flairs to the usually-strict uniform requirements, though the same would not apply to alcohol past certain levels of cider, were observed.

Those occasions, while extreme to the very end, would no doubt describe the atmosphere of the school where experiential approach was prioritised over methodical education, and project management of higher priority over pure book knowledge. For Claire Lundrigan, however, the weather had done the opposite of what was intended. For most part, she would stay quiet, the memory of what had happened earlier still ringing inside her head, and aimed her best to stay quiet and focus on catching up to work. Only a few, which had included much-concerned Adelaide and a couple of colleagues their year, would end up really speak to her for the subsequent weeks though in her case, her struggle to adjust to the new school, even when her literature and music subject scores would suggest anything but that, had made it easier to disguise the weight on her shoulder.

Finding herself isolating, even if by half a step, Claire was feeling the blues. The initial adrenaline trying to escape the situation had worn off, and with it remained a quieter, more timid self who found herself in an island, high above, in the foggy hills of Avon County. The school felt stranger for her too, the ghost-like traditions spooking her at tiniest moments, the unpredictable weather reflecting her state of mind, and her classmates, who she had not told of the situation and also tried not to ask her back, found right moments to tease her out of goodwill. For much of the time she felt exhausted and sick, though her body hadn't broken down or eroded in explicit injuries - the tip of her fingers and toes had perennially felt cold and her breaths exhibiting more irregular patterns when alone.

In search of emotional solace, without exposing much of herself openly to her peers whom she was not exactly comfortable with just yet, Claire would spend much of the semester in the art room or the music practice rooms, usually using the art rooms in the lunch hours with an elderly teacher nearing retirement in her sixties, Ms. Hanlon, while finding the practice rooms her domain for the hours after. Supported by her band and orchestra teacher, a certain Delaclav film composer of 'The Last of Unfree Republics' named Jason Davies, who had recognised that Claire held strong potential, Claire was offered more difficult material to work with than in the initial weeks, and would reciprocate by practicing well into the night, until it was close to running into the curfew hours and the prefects, who would run their on-call duties under a rotation, would quietly overlook the sophomore.

When the clock would strike close to the midnight, and her breath too light to even trill the usual glissandos she would execute with little trouble, Claire would read All Hallows at the End of Toji, a Gothic-modernist re-interpretation of Brigantine, Byeon and McDermott families from the Second Alexandrian Period more conventionally called as the 'Regency Era'. The book, the tones of which held lighter, more positive paintbrushes of Sir. Asher's earlier writings, would depict fictional Penfold Townships that were, as she would only find out by this point, based on some of the naval tales told by the seafaring Lundrigans, as well as the estately fables her mother's family, the Ramaut-Lauzons, would tell their younger kids. Whether this had helped Claire to improve her mood was another story, of course, since this had only made her miss home more, but the reminders too helped Claire anticipate seeing her family when the home would come calling.

by **West Barack and East Obama** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 2:59 am

The Chronicles of Obama: A Ballad of Bushes and Bidens

WANTED: Fortnite Duos Partner. Working Mic Required. Stand to Win Millions.

On the streets of New Barack City, hundreds of lampposts, bus stops and even innocent trees had been plastered by posters set up by a desperate Joe Biden. In an attempt to find someone - anyone - who was willing to team up with him in the quest to possibly save his life, Joe had decided to use the method that worked the best for him in the past: aggressive, yet charismatic campaigning.

"Hello sir, do you know anything about Fortnite? Sir, just a minute of your time." cried out poor old Joe outside his doorstep on Hobama Boulevard, where he tried to hand out his flyers to passerbys. But he was as reviled as the routinely-arrested street preachers that were the usual fixture along that road, and no one gave him any mind. He did this for days until the deadline for signups approached.

"Brilliant, just brilliant." he sighed on the last morning of his attempt. Eight more hours until he had to submit his signup. He had already exhausted all the available avenues, whether it was dormant connections with former Hawaii School of Economics classmates, or distant relatives from Jakartington WB, or even the terminally-online discord users on his private server. All of them declined his invitation. Not even for a million dollars, they said, would get them to play Fortnite with Joe.

"Hello?"

In the midst of his typical daydreaming, Joe had failed to notice the one person in the last week who even stopped in front of him.

"Oh... hello there. Are you interested in becoming my Fortnite duos partner? I really need to pay off my medica-"

"Medical bills. Yeah, I've been walking past you every day now and know your whole sob story."

"Oh... sorry."

"It's okay. You know, my father was recently diagnosed with step on a crack syndrome as well and he's also in need of some cash for the surgery. Apparently it's becoming sort of an epidemic."

"It is? Well, I'm really sorry to hear that."

"Yeah, anyways, we raised a lot of money but we still need about half a million to get us over the line for the surgery. So I'm willing to accept your offer. I'll even let you keep the rest of my share if you want, I just need the money."

"Oh... that's brilliant! But first, I'll need to evaluate your skills at the game. Background checks, you know. Can't be carrying everyone who decides to submit an application."

"Yeah. Of course."

"Mind coming inside? I have my PC set up."

Joe turned around and walked towards his door, and was quickly followed by this mysterious applicant. With his back turned towards them, Joe sported a wide grin. Things were finally in motion. Maybe he stood a chance.

"Okay so here's my computer. I've set up this solo match for you to play. If you manage to get a victory royale, you're in the team."

"You betcha."

Soon, the new applicant began playing the game. They dropped straight into Tilted Obamas, where they began expertly annihilating their opponents. Joe's house was filled with a cacophony of gunshots, screaming and epithets fueled by gamer rage. However, when the dust settled, there was a clear winner standing right in front of Joe.

"This has gone better than I could have ever imagined. How did you get so good at the game? Are you secretly an opponent coming to scout my setup or something?"

"None of that haha. No, I just played a lot back in the day. One of the 'OG's as they call it."

"Amazing. Well, I'd be a darn fool if I didn't welcome you immediately to the team. Welcome... uh, sorry, I didn't catch your name."

"It's Harrizz, Joe. Kobamala Harrizz."

by **Saint Eleanor** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 3:00 am

Channel 4 presents THE RACE TO THE WORLD CUP - World Cup 94, third group game
SAINT ELEANOR 1-0 COMMONWEALTH OF BAKER PARK (Jessica Martin 62)

Report by Candy Hewitt, Channel 4 football analyst: Jessica Martin's second-half strike, in what is very likely to turn out as her last ever game, could not prevent Saint Eleanor from marginally failing to overtake their opponents, the Commonwealth of Baker Park, at the OptiFone Arena in Folte, Græntfjall. The White Stars knew they could not afford to lose, but needed to win by at least two goals or otherwise hope that their result would turn out to be better than Vilita's against Huayramarca. This was not World Cup 91 - where they needed to at least earn a result against Græntfjall to advance but did not - but the stakes were no less smaller; given the Cup of Harmony win in the meanwhile, it might well have been bigger.
The Bees, fresh off wins in their first two games and gunning for a perfect group stage, clearly did not read the script; they were at their Anaian opponents almost immediately. John Bailey had already been peppered with three attempts in the first fifteen minutes; a special mention must go to Kyle Baum, who caught the midfield off guard with a short but weaving and astute dribble, caught the defence off guard with a booming 25-yarder, and must have come within a few milliseconds of surprising Bailey too.
Baum should also be commended for being a crucially-effective playmaker in the circumstances. He proved to be a far more visible influence as a starter here than he was as a substitute against Huayramarca: pitching off the two strikers in front of him, as he did by setting up Chandra Mack for what ultimately turned out to be perhaps the nearest miss of the proceedings; occasionally floating inside to break the Eleanorian marking code, at one point enabling Freddie Altman to just burst inside and force Bailey into a tricky save. But where were the Eleanorians - other than soaking up all of that pressure?
They had a couple of decent chances in the first half, but most were hurried counter-attacks whose execution impressed few. Martin herself, onside by a fittingly tight margin ran something like thirty yards with the ball and should not have floated her effort high and wide as it did. Steve Pilchard, never much of a dribbler himself, benefitted from an uneasy passing triangle with the wingers to set himself up for a nice but well-deflected effort. That was the sum of the Eleanorian efforts in the first half.
The second half was a completely different story - one in which Saint Eleanor got its hope, its dignity and its chances back. For starters, Bridget Coombe was willing to push forward and get them - and when she did eventually tease an overeager Isabelle Wiley into a yellow card, Rick Goldsmith's response to her free kick narrowly failed to make it over the line. Goldsmith was also to impress in his own right, pretending to lay off Pilchard for a chance he eventually took himself which went out off the inside of the post and (in a scene that even SESB's commentators were taken aback by) managing to usher a speculative volley onto Rossi's palms just a matter of yards away.
The big prize came just after the hour, when Wiley made another mistake - a slightly overambitious pass to Carly Logan - which Martin could not help but intercept. After some correspondence with Natalie Monaco, who was almost certainly not expecting to help out so much with her first kicks of the game, she somehow got herself into an advantageous central position, where her shot floated just underneath Beth Rossi for the first goal of the game. Unfortunately for the White Stars, Vilita had long ago scored their third goal at the Álfgrímur Arena, the site of Saint Eleanor's previous win - and Huayramarca's previous defeat - and were coasting to victory. The only thing they could reasonably hope for was a second goal, the one that would put them ahead of Baker Park on goal difference.
The tides had turned from here. Baker Park had a good few chances from there; Karrie Price, another substitute, had one of the best, heading a couple of feet over despite being a bit off-balance and surrounded by Eleanorians. Cathy Winchester - really - emerged in kind with a whipped effort that nearly succeeded in its own right, but would have doubled the lead had any of her teammates been better-positioned. Logan manages to strike the underside of the bar from the edge of the box? Fine; here's Martin, yet again, with a cool diving header that completely evaded Rossi and needed the intervention of Jerrol Allen to stop it from going in. The drama would continue... but only for so long.
By the time Adam Denby, dragged from the depths of despair and all too likely to leave the setup in 2007 for difference reasons, dragged his shot well wide with six minutes to go, Saint Eleanor had lost any and all hope of making it. Baker Park tried to get themselves the goal they needed to almost certainly put their opponents in the dust in the final moments: Baum, still tiring away after all this time, thought he had fluffed a shot that looked to be bouncing poorly, but Bailey was fortunate not to have dropped the ball altogether.
Saint Eleanor were expecting many things from the World Cup. A group stage elimination on six points? Possibly not, but it has proven to be an excellent stepping stone for many of the post-2001 players that have come through the ranks: a chance to show themselves against three of the best teams in the world, to work together in challenging situations (and that was almost all of the ones they faced), to further boost Saint Eleanor's reputation in international football and generally to have fun. Coombe was embarrassed for most of the post-match press conference and called it "the worst heartbreak I have ever had," but even she would admit that her team has done very well for itself here. Given results elsewhere, they might just have dodged a bullet too - Baker Park will have to face none other than Græntfjall in the last sixteen.

⨷ ⨶ ⨷ ⨷ ⨷ ⨷ ⨷

Thirty Years of Eleanorians - 2005: "I'm focused on delivering the best outcome for our newborns"
Published by Steven McDonald on June 23rd 2005

With ten thousand babies to be born in Saint Eleanor this year and only fifteen neonatal departments in which to give birth in, you'd expect the First National Hospital in Central district - a short hop away from all the major centres of power - to be rather bustling. Even on this momentous day, however, nurse Sarah Howell knows that little is really happening. "At best, you might get six or seven births a day here. If recent days have been anything to go by, I reckon we'll get four." It shows - we talk at 8am, when nary a soul has emerged into the ward to announce the inevitable good news.

It takes about half an hour more before the first mother-to-be emerges: Jennifer Vaughan is here to give birth to baby Alex - "I decided on the name two months ago! It's short, sweet and works a treat no matter where you are or what colour cupcake you're getting." Howell tells me that "we don't usually get this sort of humour here, do we? It's a bit on the gloomier side and there's definitely no food involved." Vaughan says that "it's delicious irony, but I don't mean it - I'm a geography teacher, not Terranean, but I like to lighten up when I can and the students love me. Maybe it's because the Eleanorian Academy isn't all that used to this kind of thing. I love baking, though." Her husband, Sergeant James Wollacott, can't be here because he's been seconded to the Esportiva Gamma army base in Nantwich until 2007 - and the extra pressure is on, with this being her first child.

Vaughan admits some time later that the delivery was "splendid - exactly how he'd want Liberation Day to go." It's a baby boy, too - "lots of surprises!" She's being looked after by a couple of the other nurses, but Howell retreats to her sanctuary, an almost open-plan office with a kettle that's "been on the brink since the 1990s. I'll be here all day, talking to you. I don't think that lasts the morning; the bloody thing set off the smoke alarm at 5am in the morning a few weeks ago, although thankfully no mothers were hurt in the making of that movie." Was this a quieter day than she expected, I ask her at lunchtime? "Definitely. Normally we'd have two mothers here. But just Jenny? And literally just Jenny?"

But a second mother had already turned up, and this time with her partner in tow. "I know the Eleanorians like asking questions about marriage," says cleaner Vanessa Bamford, "but we aren't really interested in this whole shenanigans." Michael Johnson, in normal times a tow truck driver for United Road Management, adds that "it's true but she's coming through, talk to me instead. Yeah, my statement is this is our second baby, we've been told it's a girl and hopefully we like her." They will: little Ella will surely prove the perfect match for young William. "They sound nice, the kinds of people who'll fit in well at school and whatever, and, don't tell anyone, they're named after our best friends. Will's his friend, Ella's mine!"

Number three turns up in fairly quick succession; the numbers are bad enough that Howell has been called to personally help. "I can't talk, Steven, sorry about that." Revelation is swift at hand, though: Olivia Burns has given birth to twins, James and Daniel. "My Biblical faith is almost as strong as my husband's," she adds later, "and I'd like to keep up that tradition." The man himself, Joe Donald - the only salary-earner in the house, even if as a back-of-house worker for a local pizza parlour who thankfully isn't being asked to check in until this evening - gives a firm nod. After all, they're already looking after two-year-old Sarah. "We've been through a lot of tough times but having to give birth to two children on a day of celebration... that doesn't quite fit. This is a celebration!"

Suppertime, at 5pm, looms. "Not for me, though," Howell insists; "just the old cucumber sandwich. Made it this morning, actually, but Jenny had a point about words and language. I just want the best for these babies; I can starve, I'll do myself a proper dinner around ten or eleven." We make it well on time to witness the fifth baby of the day enter the world - only one-and-a-half hours later. I thought I was well-prepared; Brian Wilson, an analyst with the Ministry for National Security and Defence, came rather less surprised. "I know, it's another Lydia. One in 200 and all that. But it's a nice name, it's all very traditional, it's fairly versatile - you've seen what's happening to Clyde Park, for example - and we'd only like one so better not waste it, shall we?" His wife, Sophie Henderson, is rather less caught up in the trappings: "Woooowwwww!" That is my cue to bid Sarah, the rest of the nurses and everyone else farewell... or so I imagined.

Right as this article goes to press at 9pm, my phone gets a call from an unfamiliar number in Central district. My suspicions are right: Howell is on the line again. "It's baby George. I'll talk to you more about him tomorrow morning if you'll meet me." Fashions may come and go - and not to accuse these parents of following the trend, given that Central is culturally and politically more uptight even than many of its neighbours - but surely, given all the context, President George Mitcham and his legacy will endure forever.

by **Brenecia** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 3:09 am

Sea Dome 1 - 0 Brenecia
(4-2-3-1) 1 - Meade; 17 - Hadley, 5 - Wheater, 6 - Jeong, 22 - Riordan (3 - Culpepper); 4 - Briggs (14 - Cheschon), 8 - Kearney; 15 - Wake, 11 - Rourke, 10 - Byrne; 13 - Stokes (21 - Graves)

Brenecia 1 - 0 Est. and Est.
(4-2-3-1) 1 - Meade; 17 - Hadley, 5 - Wheater, 6 - Jeong (22 - Auchland), 22 - Riordan; 4 - Briggs, 8 - Kearney (24 - Slivka); 15 - Wake (7 - Wakering), 11 - Rourke, 10 - Byrne (16 - Fetch); 13 - Stokes (21 - Graves)
Goal: Stokes

All it took to cause a major diplomatic incident was one phone call.
One phone call! Nephara's ambassador to Brenecia, Coretta Hearn, hung up with petulant disgust. And then sighed, and then picked the phone up again, a secure line to Corvistone, because, honestly...
"I mean, what the fuck can I do here?"
Justinian Draper, the impressively-named Minister for Foreign Affairs, tried to soothe her. "There's no cause for panic, Retta, just--"
"This is some high-end shit! I know I'm only here because it's a piece of shit post and you're sending an inexperienced paper-pusher and schmoozer, right--"
"Well..."
"-- as a show of disrespect, keep Rozelle humble. Fine. What the fuck is this?"
Draper took a deep breath. "Would you care to tell me," he said, with exaggerated care, "what it is that's actually happened?"
She told him, and he listened, slowly, before taking a deep, sharp breath. Hearn could hear him pouring out a whiskey on the rocks, on the other end of the line. Yeah, she'd love to do the same. But apparently, that option was denied her, since...
"So you're due down at the palace. The palace. To meet with the Queen."
"Yeah."
"This is highly irregular."
"You fuckin' think?" Hearn hissed out a breath. "So what do I do, boss?"
"Follow the protocols."
"The protocols are fucking divided, boss, half of them tell me to take a dagger to the place and stab her fucking eyes out."
"Follow the protocols I'm trying to tell you to follow, Retta, if you stop cutting me off for just one second... ?"
"Sorry."
"Don't think of her as a... 'queen'. Don't treat her like that. That's what she wants. Look, this Etain, she's an interventionist. She's somewhat progressive at heart... we think, but she's trying to flex her muscles and throw some red meat to the right flank at the same time. Beating up on the shags is popular. It plays well."
"Particularly after your fucking statement-- !"
"Well," said Draper mildly. "Yes."
"Thanks for that, by the way!"
Draper ignored her. "In the interests of good cooperation with Rozelle - and that is something we remain interested and invested in - go to meet her. Your fellow high-ranking diplomat, Etain Vortigern. Do not bow, do not kneel, do not kiss her fucking ring. You shake her hands and you are the very fucking picture of frosty cordiality, are we clear?"
"... Yeah." No. Fuck it. She'd try. And if she fucked up, who cared? All that was at stake was Nephara's national dignity!

Queen Etain checked her watch. Digital, of course. She was very much a contemporary figure, dressed elegantly but sensibly, not overly concerned with ornament. The Modern Royal, she liked it when magazines styled her. And her watch said: 3.57.
Three minutes to the appointed time and Hearn wasn't here. That was, by Nepharan standards, pointed lateness. If it had been another diplomat Hearn was scheduled to see you could bet she would be pacing outside fifteen minutes early. Then again, that could also be passive-aggressive. Show up even earlier just to make a pointed remark about how long they had be kept waiting...
... but she could not be late, of course. 3.59, there was a knock on her door.
An aide opened it, and immediately Hearn had to cover over her alarm. Witnesses. There were witnesses. An ambush? She quickly scanned the place. No private office, this, but a dining room.
She, herself, had dressed in dark, practical blues, respectable clothing for a respectable fellow diplomat. Etain had expected no less. Or more. She was a comely woman, by Nepharan standards. Full-figured but retaining that distinctly hawkish Nepharan cheekbone, still quite young.
"I thought this would be a private summons," she said, pointedly.
Etain smiled. "Nothing so formal. This isn't so great a thing that it can't be hashed out over tea."
Hearn walked forward, quickly, extending a hand. Please just handshake and get this over with, her grey eyes pleaded.
Etain extended hers. Ring outstretched.
Covertly, the papparazzo snapped.
Hearn hesitated for just a moment. "This is not... it is not in the traditions of my people--" she floundered.
"Yet this is Rozelle."
"Ah."
"And this is Gwyndal Palace. And you stand before a Queen."
Hearn really, really looked like she wanted to throw herself into a lake. Etain wasn't meant to force the issue. This wasn't how it was meant to go.
Her ultimate reaction surprised the Queen. She had expected the young diplomat to storm out, or perhaps to acquiesce. She had not expected Hearn to grab her hand, clench it with the other as she tried to wriggle free, and give it a couple of wrenching shakes before at last releasing.
Covertly, the papparazzo snapped, snapped, snapped.
"I'll hear what you have to say, Your Excellency," said Hearn tightly, the greatest honourific she was authorised to offer.
And Etain said it. Something something, unacceptable loss of face to tell Nepharim Brenecia was 'unsafe'. Something something, greatly regretted incidents of violence and incitement among her Parliament. No reflection of true Brenecian character, et cetera. Sorry you're offended, but fuck off. It was not the most composed bollocking. The reaction had thrown her, but in the back of her mind, she knew what was important was not anything they said here, but the pictures the man innocuously drinking tea in the orchard was already, furiously, sending off to his editors.
They would see this brute manhandle their Queen. And not even she knew, for sure, how they would react.

THE ROZELLE OBSERVER
Diplomacy comes to a head as Nepharan stubbornness leaves no way out
Corwen Rourke

Shocking photographs have emerged from the palace where a public meeting between Her Majesty Queen Etain and Coretta Hearn, Nepharan Ambassador to Brenecia - believed to be on the pretext of a 'please explain' pertaining to Nephara's recent statement on safety in Brenecia - led to an awkward breakdown in protocol, with Hearn refusing to kiss the Queen's ring and instead grasping her hand in a brusque and what does not appear a consensual manner.

It is the Observer's understanding that this has been taken as a serious breach of diplomatic protocol by Corvistone, Her Majesty Queen Etain in effect forcing Hearn's hand. The usual diplomatic sleight of hand Corvistone has used when dealing with royalty in the past has been to treat them as high-ranking diplomats; most prominently, at the Varakoula Accords, all Nepharan officials referred to the attending Banijan monarch as 'Mr. Katende', which is believed to have privately infuriated him...

CAPITAL DAILY
"We call it like we see it"
HANDS OFF OUR QUEEN! Shag hag Hearn BRUTALISES our BRAVE LASS ETAIN with VICELIKE GRIP
by Sarah Stubbs

The latest heavy-breasted thug the shags have infiltrated Rozelle with, under the pretence of being a diplomat, has shown her cards! She has shocked all right-thinking Brenecians by enveloping our Queen's hand in a crushing grip that is rich with metaphor!

It is understood that our Queen wanted merely to have tea with the Ambassador while standing up for the dignity of her people, only for the bull-necked oaf to storm in and all but ASSAULT her! Our brave girl Etain took it with immense dignity and refrained from striking her down. Would that we had been there to smite down the beast in her stead!

Doubtless, from their ivory towers in what they still consider the mainland, they will scoff at any outrage, but the fact is that ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! They are fortunate that the dignity and wisdom of the House of Vortigern have not yet seen fit to EXPEL their embassy -- or else, have been kept in check by our INCOMPETENT BUREAUCRATS! A penny for Etain's thoughts, in this matter of national honour...

by **Saint Eleanor** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 3:27 am

IC note on Eleanorian Airways: EA is an arm of the Eleanorian state. The several hundred members of cabin crew are serving in the Eleanorian Army, who have often been dangled the role instead of fulfilling their retirement; they are all technically assigned to Airport district, but do not do any actual keeping-the-country-safe there.

IC note on guns and firearms: I'm surprised I've never roleplayed this beyond my signature before. Saint Eleanor is a shall issue nation: anybody in Saint Eleanor (including tourists) may apply for, and be given, a Firearms License Certificate on confirmation of identity (and Eleanorian residence) and completion of a ~20hr training course covering the firing and safe use of all major firearm types. Everyone who joins the armed forces will be trained to FLC standard if they have not been already. Everyone known to have served on combat duty in the War of Independence, even on the Tinhamptonian side, was auto-granted an FLC upon independence. The stated purpose of this is to ensure that every Eleanorian is able to defend their country in the unlikely event that it is invaded.
The vast majority of sales to, and training of, private citizens belongs to World of Safety, a veteran-founded company which started growing rapidly in the late seventies and now has two outlets in every district; WoS will check your ID at the door and will ask you to complete their "five-day training course" if you don't have an FLC. No storage restrictions (and children who acquire a mislaid firearm are liable to be tried in whatever court suits their age). No accessory restrictions. No red flag laws. Carry only legally restricted in "government offices" (the Presidential Palace is not an office but good luck getting anywhere near) and the airport.
About 80% of residents have an FLC. Both of Lara's parents got theirs through the war, although they didn't meet until later. Lara got hers during the 2003 summer holiday; she kept a shotgun hanging off a wall in her little university-rented house just in case anybody tried to break in (the possibility never materialised, although she once fired a warning shot to disperse a group of Rulandese teenagers who were pumping loud techno music outside her street at 3am).

OOC on RP permissions: Nephara cleared the Lexandrija roleplay in full. Vdara also cleared the mention of Lara's article being written from a café somewhere in her nation; look out for her dispatches from the land of beans, Greek and staunchness next cutoff.

OOC on Lara: I am going to tell you exactly how the story ends. It ends with Lara Torridge being shot to death by Mertagnian forces at the end of their war against Bostopia, becoming the last casualty of the conflict, after visiting every other Anaian nation she possibly could.
I'm doing this now because the end will be posted during WCQ97. This doesn't mean it'll happen in 97, and Mert's assured me that the war will have long concluded by then. In exchange, I've thrown him a reminder that this roleplay, in Eleanorian time, encompasses the entire year of 2006... which you'll note falls in the WC94 cycle. Having the Ocean of Ayes war end in Saint Eleanor before it even begins in the rest of Anaia is the price I pay for having a wordy, desperate and time-stressed uni student on my hands.
If anyone cares, Lara's household income is around $125,000 (but technically zero since she is being sent out many-expenses-paid by Academy) - her dad is the manager of one of the local post offices and her mum works as an accountant. Now you know how she is able to get through all of this while remaining as middle-class as possible.

The Grand Tour of Anaia - Saint Eleanor: My New Year's resolution is to travel the world... almost

by Lara Torridge - January 4th 2006

It takes some kicking to know when you're beaten, but I've finally decided that maybe I don't want to be a shrink any more. The hours are long, the fifty-minute hours are longer, everything is depressing. So, with such relatively short notice, I decided I had nothing better to do than to pay a visit to the University's Career Centre - not such a good idea when it's -6 degrees outside (that's 21 degrees if you're stuck in the 1950s); probably a better one when your house is a five-minute walk away and you know the receptionist does a damned fine coffee.

I actually thought the door was stuck when I tried to open it, although that kind of thing can result if you wake up in a cold sweat at what would otherwise be a perfectly reasonable hour and then start walking around town without having had anything. I was thankfully put out of my misery a couple of minutes later by Patricia, "the careers lady," the one who seemed to be there every morning whenever we needed her. Only now did I find out that it was her job. I didn't ask her for some java: she just asked me "would you like a cuppa?" and I had no other sensible choice but to oblige.

As she slid the mug, by a matter of millimetres given her advancing age, on the table, she told me that "you can take that with you." And where I was supposed to take it? All I had to do was follow the man who had just entered - the retired professor Richard Gardner, who probably defined "gruff" better than any other Eleanorian of his kind could. I barely sat down when he asked me: "You've had a few ideas, but they haven't stuck. Would you like to write something for the Academy?" Of course I would.

"I think you would do good at it. You were Psychology - that's a good few essays and quite a bit of statistical analysis, both of which we'd need for an international correspondent of sorts." An international correspondent... of sorts? How was I supposed to cope? "I mean, you do also look and feel like our target audience. A bit jaded... on the more affluent side of things, let's say. And you have a great sense of humour." I'm not sure how much of that I was meant to belief. "I've read what you've done for Academy in the past. It was excellent. It's unfortunate for you that the pieces always had to keep to ten or twelve paragraphs, but editor's prerogative."

I'd already accepted the fate he'd handed down on me: "we'd be interested in having you tour all the known countries of Anaia, or at least the ones that would like to let you in, over the course of this year. Just for a year; just as a gap year. What you do after this is up to you." I have some ideas: I'd most likely sit the Army commissioned officers' examination or apply for the non-military civil service. The Eleanorian private sector isn't all that fun, and my parents know people who'll admit it, but maybe I could find a nice job elsewhere in the region.

So, here I am, in one of the local airport lounges, writing down (I wish I could say) my thoughts, but more so how I came to be in a position where I was wondering about my future at the start of the morning and on the gap year of a lifetime by the start of the evening I'd like to stress that I am not doing this because I was forced, or even politely asked, to, although the sales pitch was terribly addictive. My mission is to instead educate every Eleanorian about the wider Anaia region, what happens, what the big (and small) attractions are - and are like, how customs and cuisine work, what you need (and don't) need to see - or, in short, how to become a cosmopolitan.

What good are we if we do not pay our respects to those who live alongside us? I will try my best to approximate that. If you so wish, you may follow in my footsteps; explore a little further, a little farther, perhaps even a little better. I strongly encourage you to, should you get the chance: no 22-year-old can do justice to so many places in so little time!

What I'm taking with my luggage

Twenty $5 notes - just in case I need them
Ten $100 notes - I've been asked to exchange them to the local currency wherever I go
My bank card - First Eleanorian, of course, and to be regularly replenished by the Academy financial board
My driving license - I'm allowed to drive cars (most people are) and motorcycles (only 2,000 people are, apparently)
My firearms license - it's very unlikely I'll end up needing to use it, or even being able to, but let's see
My University diploma - Masters of Science in Psychology, second class, division one, with honours (in shorthand)
A few shirts - some long-sleeved, some short-sleeved and one very pretty Sword and Shield top (if I say so myself)
A few bottoms - normal jeans, tighter-than-normal jeans, a denim skirt, a pleated skirt, a really long skirt and even hotpants... oh my
A tailored trouser set and a pink tweed skirt set - being prepared for everything does mean that most of the time
A pair of trainers, a pair of heels, a pair of brogues and a pair of nice sturdy boots - see above
A tiny little coat - for when the weather's bad, but not that bad
A really big coat, some skinny jeans, and a pair of stylish tall boots - these aren't in my luggage; I'll be wearing these on the plane later today!
A nice chronograph watch I'm also wearing that my dad bought for $200 in 1969 - it's worth about $4,000 now, just in case
A pair of gloves... which I should have been wearing in these conditions, but completely forgot to

The Grand Tour of Anaia - Lexandrija: Nuclear superpower doesn't quite make for the best start to a trip

by Lara Torridge - January 7th 2006

It might surprise you to note that Eleanorian Airlines still operates flights to the airport in Iskandabad, the capital of Lexandrija, long after a seemingly minor inconvenience the locals call The Glory took hold among the national population. "Ignore the clicking of those geiger counters" and watch out for "The Illuminated" on the pitch, the national football association continues to recommend to this day in the roster packs it sends out to those anoraks who happen to be sufficiently curious about the CAFA Cup.

I was not surprised that the flight I boarded was run on what must have been a twin-propeller aircraft from the original pre-independence fleet or that there were maybe five or six passengers onboard. I didn't pay for business class, which is as good as you can get on these things, but perched myself on one of those seats and wondered what would happen. The flight attendant, a fifty-something NCO in full Army camouflage, didn't mind. When I told him what I was doing, he gave me a thumbs-up and said "you deserve it." I don't know if I deserved that in particular, but I definitely deserved something, anything, as a distraction from what was to come.

Before there was Lexandrija, there was Iskandervale, a nice, touristy place with a few hundred thousand inhabitants, a handful of quirky beaches and more than its fair share of conflict. This Eleanorian would find much to like in the old Iskandervale. I found absolutely nothing in Lexandrija. Nothing, that is, except a couple of oddities that most likely had absolutely no right to be there.

There's a small fast food place in one of the buildings that survived the war which calls itself Beacon Burger House; its logo is an almost embarrassing copy of Saint Eleanor's very own Torch burger chain. It failed its last health and safety inspection, seven years ago, around the same time I had to miss a couple of days of secondary school back home with food poisoning. Nobody has come around to check since and the manager, who claims to be an Eleanorian expat called Rob, says that his kitchen staff are far more diligent today. The geiger counter is in my pocket; it doesn't make much of a noise. I don't ask if he's telling the truth about anything - the local authorities insisted, albeit in 2000, that no outsiders had tried to move there.

The menu does not even pretend to copy Torch's array of options: there are three or four different, if generic, burgers; a side of chips if you'd like; cans of blue Aurora, the homeland's most famous soda (he hasn't had any in stock for a long time); and tap water. When the waiter comes, I look at him and his almost-glowing green eyes askance, while my coat starts making uncomfortable noises. I hand him a five-dollar note for my boring hamburger and eau de tap, and he accepts reluctantly; I doubt it would be accepted anywhere else here. It is irritating, overcooked, and generally untrustworthy.

Along the way, there and back, is the stadium for Esteqlal, the club known during the old way of life as Iskandabad United; it looks unremarkable and, for a change, dull. I've walked maybe four or five kilometres and decide to flag down what I think is a taxi. It is, in fact, a normal car, driven by a confused Lexandrijan who insists she has never seen anyone like me before. She asks what the ticking noise is; I say that my watch needs some servicing and I need to go to the airport to get it done. I've only seen the roads this empty once before, when I was hitting up one of the motorways in the Eleanorian countryside at 2am on a Sunday morning.

I leave without exchanging any currency, without seeing much in the way of local landmarks, without even having the courage to do anything - although I've been telling myself I'm saving that up for future times instead. I am thankfully writing this not from Beacon Burger House, not in the toilets at the airport, nor even from one of the hospitals which I assume would have to be looking after some of the supposed beneficiaries of The Glory. I am instead armed with my pen and notepad in a pretty little café somewhere in Vdara. You'll have to wait until next week to find out where it is or what it's like.

What I wore: the massive coat, massive boots and tiny little jeans from last time
What I spent: five Eleanorian dollars
What I've got left over: 95 Eleanorian dollars; 1,000 more Eleanorian dollars because I didn't convert them (sadly, that adds up to 1,095)

by **Brusseldorf** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 3:44 am

Match Reports

sort by |latest ⮟|

Brusseldorf 2–2 Commonwealth of Baker Park: three talking points
November 21st
Fennec Stadia, Casablanca, Brusseldorf

1) This test against an elite team showcased promise
World Cup qualification matches always have the capacity to descend into farce, with one side massively overpowering the other, or conservative football being played. But, there was still plenty here to have Craig Foster purring. Demonstrating “beautiful” positive football, Brusseldorf clicked for long periods, most noticeably at the start of each half. Their pressing was synchronised and panicked Baker Park in the right areas of the pitch at the right times. They boasted celerity not only in their passes as well as of movement on and off the ball, with real speed of thought through the centre. So impressive was their tempo that they actually forced Baker Park to change systems midway through the first period, swapping to a back four, in search of a foothold. When was the last time Brusseldorf did that to one of the world’s perceived elite sides?

2) Baker Park’s side were nowhere near their best
Even that, of course, requires context. This was far from Baker Park’s first team. — Will Barnard’s players were rattled by some robust challenges as well as all that initial quick Brusseldorfen thinking, and struggled to coax Quinton Harris into the game for all the busy invention of Lucie Shanahan and Isabelle Wiley. Their defense was despondent and recurrently overwhelmed by the hosts’ urgency, which is more reason for local optimism.

3) Hernández was ready to light up this stage
Michael Hernández is swiftly evolving into a linchpin of this team’s modus operandi. Just as at Behotzadt Casablanca, where the midfielder is thriving in a more central role and never seems to stop running, he is the kind of player in whom managers are eager to place their trust. That drought at the start of his international career is a distant memory, with the quality of his recent form in Brusseldorf’s matches. Yet it was his pass, arced gloriously around Antoine Jones for Teddy Wolfenden to collect and draw the decisive foul from Rose McCormack, that truly epitomised the 26-year-old’s quality. Casablanca will be fretting over the injury to Hernández’ right ankle, inflicted by a frazzled Freddie Altman, ahead of the weekend trip to the player’s former club, Sahara Compétitif. His absence feels like a proper loss these days.

Lineups

Brusseldorf
12 Gimenza Azoulay
2  Boronia
3  Gabriel Lellouche
4  Ricard Sciolan
5  Andrea Zidane
6  Sarah Pickett
7  Michael Hernández
8  Vindark Al Maghribī
9  Teddy Wolfenden
23 Marcev Steyr
20 Aktha Akiveal

Substitutes
13 Dom Harrak (s 60')
22 Sven Prote (s 78')
19 Yasmine Benamar (s 78')
14 Phil Lataste (s 93')

The Commonwealth of Baker Park
Rose McCormack
Emily Bruce
Antoine Jones
Magda Kucera 
Lucie Shanahan
Isabelle Wiley
Freddie Altman
Olivia Ryan
Quinton Harris
Ben Moorman
Serena McDavid

Substitutes
Jon Schulman (s 55')
Carly Logan (s 56')
Elena Diaz (s 58')
Karrie Price (s 61')

by **Saint Eleanor** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 3:51 am

Turf Boys on Patrol
Episode I: The Boys

A boring, cloudy day in March 2007, somewhere in Sunset Gates

Lônâís Rêndô wants absolutely none of your bullshit. Not if you were Émérí Jöléé, either. "Emmers! Get here, you cunt!" Tagging him by the scruff of his Rülândéá Kôstä top... wait a minute. "You idiot. Think I trust a Mâ Âlâmëómë fan with anything?"

"Yeah. You trust me with your life. Your plans, your job. Your fucking life."

"What plans, mate?"

"I'm not your mate. You listen to me... that house over there, yeah?"

"I live on King Street. This... Shrub Avenue is like no man's land to me. Are you trying to make me a patsy for your scheme?"

"I'm a Turf Boy, not a tax planner. You're a Turf Boy. Listen here. That house belongs to Catherine Ellis. She's one of the snobs. She hates me. She'd hate you if you were in Year 14."

"I'm not in Year 14. I'm in Year 13. Year 13 have their own village idiots."

"Yes. You have a village lydiot. Technically she's a Lydia-Rose Meldrum... but I'd get after the shrubs first. Then the flowers."

"What are you going to do?"

"We will not, under any circumstances, set her house on fire. We are Farf. We are brothers. That would be dignifying the place. Instead, we are to... can't explain without Lydia's parents getting in the way."

"Oh, another one of those victims of modern slavery. Two parents in the Army and that."

"DON'T SAY THAT OUT LOUD IN THE MIDDLE OF A FUCKING STREET! YOU IDIOT! You know what you need to do. Do it."

Fifteen minutes later

"Mum?"

"Fine. I'll open the door."

"Everywhere. It's gone everywhere, mum!"

Another two hours later

Lônâís Rêndô wants absolutely none of your bullshit. Not if you were Lêj Feêr, either. "Heeeeeeeey, Lej! What's up?"

"Lonny, you don't know what you did." Click-click. "Cathy's your friend. Not your enemy. She wanted the best for you." Clickity click click.

by **Sylestone** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 3:53 am

World Cup 95 Matchday 10/11

It's coming to head very shortly... will you make it, or will you instead Fall At Your Feet?

by **Stevencousin** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 5:07 am

STEVENCOUSIN FOOTBALL ASSOCIATION

Stevencousin National Team Partners with Cooperstorm for Leading Edge Field Management

In a groundbreaking move aimed at improving the standard of football infrastructure, the Stevencousin National Team has signed a strategic agreement with Cooperstorm, a leading provider of equipment for the construction and maintenance of football pitches. This collaboration aims to revolutionize the management of the playing surface of the Federal Unity Stadium, ensuring the best quality control and safety.

Cooperstorm's advanced testing equipment will play a key role in this effort, providing real-time data to field supervisors. Metrics such as traction, firmness, and various other parameters will be monitored, empowering field supervisors to make informed decisions about maintenance and improvements. This commitment to data-driven decision-making aims to establish the Federal Unity Stadium as a benchmark for world-class football grounds.

Cooperstorm has long been recognized for its comprehensive range of products tailored for the construction and maintenance of football pitches. From ground preparation to field monitoring and safety equipment, their offerings cover the entire spectrum of field care. The product range includes field construction equipment, field maintenance equipment, field testing equipment, field monitoring equipment, and field safety equipment.

One of the standout features of Cooperstorm equipment is its emphasis on sustainability. By using environmentally friendly materials and designs, Cooperstorm enables groundskeepers to reduce their carbon footprint while maintaining the best possible playing surface. This is in line with the growing global focus on sustainable practices in the sports industry.

The benefits of using Cooperstorm equipment are multifaceted. Improved pitch quality is at the forefront, with products designed to create and maintain pitches that are not only safe but also playable at the highest level. The financial aspect is not overlooked either, as Cooperstorm equipment is said to significantly reduce maintenance costs.

Player safety is another major consideration. Cooperstorm safety equipment, including fences, goalposts, and nets, is designed to minimize the risk of player injury, contributing to an environment where athletes can perform at their best without compromising their well-being.

In short, Cooperstorm emerged as a leading company offering high-quality solutions for the construction and maintenance of football pitches. With a customer base that includes a wide range of organizations, Cooperstorm products promise better pitch quality, reduced maintenance costs, improved player safety, and a commitment to environmental sustainability. The collaboration between the Stevencousin National Team and Cooperstorm is set to set new standards in the field of football infrastructure, providing a model for future partnerships in the sports industry.

Scorer List
5 goals: Jochen Boi
4 goals: Simon Armas
3 goals: Leon Voloshyn & Gerard Kallstrom
2 goals: Thanuka Jayamanna
1 goals: Válter Folha & Gürkan Lichtsteinerr

Assist List
3 assists: Josef Snajdr
2 assists: Simon Armas, Válter Folha, Thanuka Jayamanna, Steinar Norvoll, & Sumith Wanigassoriya

Stevencousin 2-0 Ko-oren
Federal Unity Stadium, Cassaholm[97,302]

DEFENSIVE SIDE
Franck Faty [GK]
Steven van Oudenhove [DEF.]
Renato Miguel Boa-Morte [DEF.]
Armando Correia [DEF.]
Alon Bernstein [DEF.]

OFFENSIVE SIDE
Josef Snajdr [MID.]
Andre Saifi [MID.]
Válter Folha [MID.]
Steinar Norvoll [MID.]
Gürkan Lichtsteinerr [FWD.]
Steven Cheyrou [FWD.]

SUB'S.
Jochen Boi [MID.]
Thanuka Jayamanna [MID.]
Sumith Wanigassoriya [FWD.]
Chathura Vimalaharan [DEF.]
Raymond Aas [DEF.]

ASSIST
Andre Saifi [MID.]
Gürkan Lichtsteinerr [FWD.]

GOAL
Gürkan Lichtsteinerr [FWD.] minute 51
Thanuka Jayamanna [MID.] minute 88

Aphrilia 0-0 Stevencousin
Pallas Millennium Stadium, Pallas City [56,711]

DEFENSIVE SIDE
Ramiro Fernandes [GK]
Mads Dahl [DEF.]
Renato Miguel Boa-Morte [DEF.]
Benjamin Hadjadj [DEF.]
Steven van Oudenhove [DEF.]

OFFENSIVE SIDE
Josef Snajdr [MID.]
Carlos Whitfield [MID.]
Thanuka Jayamanna [MID.]
Válter Folha [MID.]
Leon Voloshyn [FWD.]
Steven Cheyrou [FWD.]

SUB'S.
Andre Saifi [MID.]
Jochen Boi [MID.]
Steinar Norvoll [MID.]
Gerard Kallstrom [FWD.]
Chathura Vimalaharan [DEF.]

ASSIST
-

GOAL
-

by **Gnejs** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 5:50 am

Killer Bob’s WCQ34 Match reports
MD3. Kiryu-Shi - Gnejs: 4-1

One of the midfielders for Kiryu-Shi has a real thuggish look about him. It’s that blend of looking mean and stupid at the same time. That’s always a dangerous combination. He reminds me of a hit I was commissioned to do down south years ago. Local drug-lord wannabe. He had this nasty habit of recruiting young boys to do his dirty work, and whenever he encountered any resistance he would start threatening the families. The local Constabulary were aware and would probably have gotten him in the end, but it was hard getting people to talk, because the guy and his auxiliary thugs had instilled a very real fear in the community; if you talk, you die. It never got that far, thankfully, but I studied the guy and in my opinion he would’ve started dropping bodies without hesitation, should he feel it was needed. You could see it in his eyes and in the way he spoke. There was a cold meanness there, the kind that just makes you know this is a person who won’t think twice about stabbing you in the throat, and at the same time there’s that dim-witted shine that makes you equally sure he’s like to do it at any time because he’s too stupid to think about consequences. The Kiryu-Shi midfielder had that same thing. You could tell by just looking at him that he’d have no problem inflicting a career-ending injury on you while not thinking twice about the referee standing next to him. But he never did stab anyone in the throat. During all the time I surveilled him, I never saw him actually engaging in violence. The fear of him being likely to go crazy at any time was enough for him not having to go crazy. Maybe he was just using his vicious looks, achieving his aims by consciously playing on the fear he knew he produced in those around him. Because that was the result, all throughout the game he never plays dirty, still all the Dandelions avoid him. He’s no playmaker, but when the opponents fear you like that, you can still make play happen. Meaning that perhaps he was actually really smart. I dropped him in end, point blank range.

How Baggieland got a Rock of Friendship

Part three: An invitation

Fandango had spent several days on the small island to the very west of the Rushmori continent, enjoying himself immensely in the company of his new companion. Lady Madame Xianggu, as Fandango called her, was like a whirlwind of elegant extravagance and beautiful sophistication, and probably a lot of other combinations of closely related words. She could light up a room just by entering it, and as by some primal force everyone immediately recognized her natural superiority.

Fandango was mesmerized, and he felt a tremendous respect towards the great lady and a profound gratitude at being allowed to be an integral part of her entourage. She was everything he wanted to be: a true aristocrat; a friend to a real king. Oh, how he envied proper nobility. Because, for all the noble efforts of the House of Molineux, the fact remained that The Union had no aristocracy of the kind you could find in other places. The House of Molineux was wealthy, having made a fortune as a pioneer in the goat cheese industry in days of yore, and they brandished that wealth to the world with the lavish chateau and the family crest and the ancestral heirlooms. But, they were no more noble than the man down the road from the chateau who carved spanking sticks for a living and preferred to sleep on an earthen floor. Why can’t we have a real nobility, Fandango often lamented, with the titles and the recognized crests and the privileges, where you can own people inhabiting your land and kill them indiscriminately if you so desired; perfect gentlemen and fully autonomous lords tending the land and the peons dotting it like a loving but stern father; oh the joy of what could’ve been.

But Fandango was not one to let reality dictate his life, and he carried himself like the persona he wanted to be. These days were a time of Union Dandyism, of course, and Fandango had embraced it fully. He had modeled himself according to an intricate mixture of grooming routines, sophisticated phraseology, tailored suits with flagrant colors and refined hobbies. To him, these things were a «powerful symbol of the aristocratic superiority of mind», as a man much cleverer than Fandango once put it. He took his inspiration from the big papers and their fashion pages that detailed the latest trends in Port Kejm, and he felt utterly unique in his stylish lordliness when he strutted around the western countryside. Ironically, the dandy youths of the capital were more or less exclusively what Fandango would deem lowbred, and their sense of fashion was very much inspired by continental trends. The «elites» of Union society - pretty much old people with cushy public sector jobs and stable income - still mostly retained their wigs and powder, coupled with boiled leather vests over flowing lace shirts embroidered with arcane runes and other similar symbols.

This irony was completely lost on Fandango, for he was a stupid man. A talentless boy with a mean streak, he was universally loathed by both neighbors, parents and his many siblings. His mother and father had all but given up on him ever contributing anything to the family affairs beyond unnecessary expenses, so it came as quite the surprise when they announced that Fandango had been chosen as one of the nine Union emissaries traveling out into the great big world Off-Rock. It was a surprise to Fandango, at least. The rest of the family of course understood it was all a ruse, because clearly The Union would never send nine emissaries. «An ample opportunity for Fandango to spend some time on his own,» his mother had proclaimed after her son had left for the boats on the western shore.

But never mind if Fandango was supposed to be out representing The Union, for he was out there and be it by fate or chance it seemed that he had stumbled upon a rare opportunity. For on the first day of the third week of his stay on the island, Lady Madame Xianggu announced that all preparations were in order and Fandango had been granted an audience with the fabled King of the Baggies.

by **Mertagne** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 9:20 am

A collection of news articles from around Mertagne.

BOSTOPIAN BLOCKADE REAFFIRMED
Mertagnian ships unable to leave ports on Grinshem Sea

Mertagnian cargo ships have become unable to enter or leave the northern ports of Keers and Ostosaide, as the Bostopian assault on the nation enters a new phase.

The news comes after the Mertagnian Naval Force suffered a series of defeats to the east of Mertagne’s holdings in the Grinshem Sea two days ago, as renewed attacks from the Bostopian Naval forces broke through the Mertagnian naval defence, with four ships lost in the battle. While a state of blockade has existed since the outset of the war, with Bostopian ships trawling major shipping routes in the Grinshem Sea and seizing goods headed to Mertagne, this marks the first time that a fully enforced blockade has been put into place. Key Mertagnian ports such as the Port of Keers and the Port of Ostosaide have been locked down by Bostopian forces at sea, and no ship is allowed to enter or leave the port. Bostopian communications have claimed that sailors will do so ‘on pain of capture or death’, and as a result, all major shipping to Mertagne is believed to have ceased.

Shipping continues around the Calanian continent, albeit at a significantly slower pace than usual, with supercontainers choosing to avoid the conflict altogether and either divert around the southern side of Calania, or sail far enough north to not enter the seas to the north of Mertagne. Neutral nations such as New Gesem are likely to be disproportionately affected by this blockade, and will likely become increasingly reliant on partners such as Huayramarca or United Hawkland for maritime trade.

Mertagne instead becomes increasingly reliant on the hampered Trans-Calanian railway, which while operational sees stringent security checks that have delayed imports considerably as the Border Guard checks for Bostopian contraband and spies coming from New Gesem, or Starblaydia. The southern leg of the railway, running from Dannin through to Emberton, was closed in the outset of the war due to fears that the Bostopians would use the Krytenian route as an attack vector. It is rumoured that the main tunnel network that runs under the mountains between Krytenia and Mertagne has not only been bricked up, preventing access, but also contains manned defences in the event that Krytenia, who has remained neutral in this conflict erupting on their doorstep, is invaded by Bostopians.

The Mertagnian government has urged merchant sailors that operate out of the ports to remain calm and to cease their operations where possible. Bostopian communications have reported a state of ‘total warzone’ in Mertagnian territories in the Grinshem Sea, meaning that any activity will be met with resistance from Bostopian forces. Ships in anchorage areas, which are under the defence of the Naval Force, have been told to remain abandoned.

The Mertagnian Naval Force remains resilient, and northern shore-side defences have been reinforced against the ongoing threat of invasion. Starting today, civilians are banned from entering within 200m of the coastline in Ostosaide, and work has begun to dismantle the theme park on Ostosaide’s pier, which has remained closed for several months now, and replace it with further sea defences.

TERROR RAINS FROM THE SKY
Hundreds killed and city devastated after two nights of intense Bostopian Bombing

Rescue squads continue the search today for survivors in the ruins of buildings brought down by an intense Bostopian missile campaign over the city of Keers yesterday morning. While an early warning was given after scouts managed to spot the fleet of planes flying towards the northern port city, it is believed that due to the timing of the attack, several people were unable to make it to their shelter in time, with others being trapped within.

A local industrial estate is among the largest casualties of the attack, with the complex appearing to be completely flattened according to eyewitness reports. It is rumoured that 600 people were working on site during the time of the attack, and it is currently unknown how many have survived. No munitions were stored on site, but rubble created during the missile attack is believed to have caused many to be trapped within the building.

The work of rescue squads from the military, consisting of career soldiers and Mertagne’s many conscripts, has been invaluable in saving lives across the city. The coordinated response of the Military Guard and Navy Force soldiers operating in the city have allowed for a greater labour force to work in bringing the city up to operational standards.

In the advent of the attack, Mertagne’s future World Cup Qualifying matches have been moved to a secret location to protect civilians and athletes, after the east stand of the Box 2 Box Ballstadion was destroyed in the attack.

Luckily, the Vessel of Victory - Keers’ most famous landmark and likely a key target of the Bostopian attack in an attempt to erode morale - remains undestroyed. This symbol of victory over tyranny, gifted to Mertagne by Kita-Hinode in the wake of the Corvidae War, reminds us to continue in these dark times against fascism to the South of the Bekk. Naval Force aircraft shot down six planes with a combination of anti-aircraft guns and counter-fighters, while Mertagne lost nine planes in the defence of the nation yesterday (one pilot saved), and two in air raids on Bostopian territory.

MINISTER FOR AGRICULTURE ANNOUNCES NEW CHANGES TO FOOD RATIONING
Luxury goods must be ‘made to go the distance’

The Councillor for Agriculture, Seanna Ingermann, announced that Mertagnian households will have to ‘rely more on staples in the coming months’ after the blockade that has hit Mertagnian shores continues to erode the nation’s ability to import food.

In communications delivered from the Ministry of Agriculture in Dannin yesterday in response to the ongoing challenges posed by Bostopia’s blockade of Mertagnian ports, Councillor Ingermann acknowledged that the nation would be placed under hardships as the winter continues and into spring, assuring the public that the wartime government is actively looking to develop new ways to combat food insecurity during these challenging times.

Goods impacted by the announcement include typically imported goods such as palm oils, bananas, chocolate, nuts, and coffee. These, among others, will be placed under stricter regulation at the point of sale, with households further limited in how much they can buy in the space of a week. Households are further encouraged, as they were at the start of the war, to prioritise on the consumption of staple foods such as bread and potatoes, and to look for the “Made in Mertagne” sticker that is usually present on goods wholly made within the nation. The government aims that by doing so, the current stocks of non-essential or ‘luxury’ items can last even as the blockade continues.

“Staple foods such as grains, fish if you live near the coast, and locally produced vegetables should be the foundation of our current diet”, explained Ingermann in a radio segment on MCLM Blue. “That doesn’t mean we won’t have any variety - Mertagne has a wealth of food produced within its borders that we typically export out to other countries. In these times, we will instead have to eat that food here at home. As for the items we have from other countries, it is imperative that we make these items go the distance and sustain ourselves throughout the duration of the Bostopian blockade.”

In an attempt to further support these changes, the Ministry of Agriculture is releasing further information on the preservation of luxury goods, in order to inform civilians on how they can create less food waste, keep their food preserved for longer, and make their food go further. Suggestions include the dispensation of ‘coffee bulker’ consisting of roasted barley, which will allow more cups of coffee to be produced from the same amount of beans. Other suggestions include ingredient replacements in popular dishes with locally sourced ingredients.

Further support is to be given to local farmers in order to ramp up the production of staple foods, including meat and cheese, and citizens are once again encouraged heavily to grow their own food in gardens and community spaces.

Councillor Ingermann expressed confidence that by facing these challenging times head on, Mertagne would prevail in the face of Bostopian oppression and emerge stronger. She concluded her segment on MCLM Blue by urging the Mertagnian citizenry to continue embracing the spirit of cooperation.

by **Baggieland** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 9:50 am

The Scheme

Victor Frederick Palace, 42-43 Brummie Road, Hawthorn, Baggieland (next to the Woodman pub).

Dundee Talke: "I see the pirate has returned empty-handed, that wasn't part of the deal."

King Alsqueak: "Where is my gold you bilge rat?"

Sunny Austin: "Yaar, Your Most Gracious Landlubbing Majesty Sir. Madame Xianggu currently be in negotiation with some oddly dressed fella."

King Alsqueak: "Why is that of interest to me?"

Sunny Austin: "Yaar, Your Royal Landlubbingness, this fella be incredibly rich, so Madame Xianggu be buttering him up so we can rob him later."

King Alsqueak: "So get on and rob him then!"

Sunny Austin: "Yaar, but he be coming here and ye gotta pretend to know all about root vegetable plague."

King Alsqueak: "What do you know about this, Dundee?"

Dundee Talke: "Very little Your Majesty. We've never had it here in Baggieland."

Sunny Austin: "It be happening in Gnejs, where this strange fella be from."

King Alsqueak: "Gnejs? Bring that jester here now."

Oddstein Øye: "Would you like another joke Your Majesty?"

King Alsqueak: "Sure, go for it."

Oddstein Øye: "How do mathematicians scold their children?"

King Alsqueak: "I don't know, tell us jester!"

Oddstein Øye: "If I've told you n times, I've told you n+1 times!"

King Alsqueak: "I don't get it."

Dundee Talke: "Your humour gets worse by the day. Why can't you tell us jokes like the dead Gnejsian statesman again? That one was hilarious!"

King Alsqueak: "Talking of Gnejs, what do you know about root vegetable plague?"

Oddstein Øye: "I've heard it's affecting dear old Gnejs in a terrible way. Why do you ask?"

King Alsqueak: "Some rich berk in stupid clothing is coming here because he thinks we can solve this plague."

Oddstein Øye: "Oh, that must be Fandango Molineux. Yes, his family is incredibly rich. If you can tell him the cure to this plague, I'm sure he will reward you greatly."

Sunny Austin: "We don't be wanting no reward. We be wanting all of it."

Dundee Talke: "That's quite right jester. Now, are you going to help us rob this guy of all his family fortune?"

Oddstein was in a bit of a pickle. Should he betray his beloved Gnejs in its hour of need and be an accomplice to the plundering of the respected Molineux family's fortune? On the other hand, it was Gnejs that exiled him and it was Baggieland that welcomed him and gave him a job. What should he do?

by **Yakk** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 10:09 am

Does success in football lead to industry boom? Yak says Yes!
http://www.Impericalnews.yak

A new cash crop in the Empire?

YAK EMPIRE - The recent success of the Yak Empire has done one thing to the nation that should be expected but not int he way people thought. That is Tourism! The Yak Empire is seeing a boom in tourism as of late and not just from nations such as Baggieland and Cassadaigua, but also those in other parts of the world such as Banija and Squornshelous. The tourism boost has helped thanks in part to more and more heads being turned to TV or streaming platforms broadcast the Empires National Football Team.

One other thing that has helped with this unintended tourism campaign is the recent trip by Emporer Nyam-Orgil I to the bottom of our largest lake, Lake Lake Uyungurt. The area of Uryungurt in the south east of the nation has been a popular point of travel to many in the region and now a huge hiking culture is starting to develop in the region. Photos of the trip have made many a curious traveller want to and sometimes even partake of a trip to the forests of the southeastern Yak Empire.

The other industry most heavily impacted by the tourist boom and the fascination of the Yak Empire region has been the food industry. Local delicacies such as fermented horse milk (Kumis), a popular drink especially in the eastern portion of the nation where a heavy Turkic population lies, and Ogar (A fish native to the Yak River and Lake Uyungurt). Ogar itself has been a popular food for the local populace but commercialized versions abroad are super rare. The fish itself is fairly abundant especially amongst the Yak River, and even more commercial grade fisheries exist where you can expect that fish to be farmed, but even then those Fisheries are for the most part used to only serving a domestic market, so with the uptick in foreign sales, its very interesting to see what happens with the fishery industry in the Yak Empire.

YAK EMPIRE - 0
NONE

CARPATHIA AND RUTHENIA -3
Acconci 18', 62' (PK), 90+2

YAK EMPIRE - 3
Orgaat 58' 70'
Tsedinaat 11'

BAGGIELAND- 1
Xi (og) 45'

by **Eshialand** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 10:28 am

One More Hurdle

"KARSTEN! It's time again!"
"Taco Tuesday time?"
"No silly, Tournament Report time!"
"Ohhhhh right..."

"I'm Josh Seametzle..."
"...I'm Karsten Rhodes..."
"...and welcome back to Eshialand's favorite sports news show, Tournament Report!!"

"So, Karsten, how do you feel about Eshialand securing the W away in Aleirave?"
"Honestly, it was absolutely necessary for them, if they lost I would've had some major issues..."
"As a second plus, Aleirave managed the upset away in Cardenao, holding them back despite the Owls' little hiccup in Brusseldorf!"
"Oh wow that's absolutely clutch... what's the table looking like now, since I know you want to show us."
"I absolutely do."

      Group 2                                Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
1     Eshialand                               11    8   0   3    34   20  +14    24
2     Cardenao                                11    6   2   3    23   20   +3    20
3     Commonwealth of Baker Park              11    4   5   2    29   22   +7    17
4     Hapilopper                              11    5   2   4    33   27   +6    17
5     Brusseldorf                             11    5   2   4    19   16   +3    17
6 (Z) City of Myrtle Beach                    11    4   2   5    15   20   −5    14
7 (Z) Aleirave                                11    4   1   6    25   28   −3    13
8 (E) Rea San Vegas                           11    0   2   9    12   37  −25     2

(Z) indicates a team can no longer achieve 1st place, but could still make the playoffs.
(E) indicates a team is eliminated from playoff contention

"Well, RIP Seagulls I suppose."
"This has just not been their year... but look at the middle of this pack, everybody is so close together!"
"All of them poised to take the advantage at the drop of a hat..."
"Actually... I think I need to introduce you to something, Karsten."
"And that is?"
"The number one."
"I already know the number one well, after all I always tell the maître d' that I want a table for one... when will it be two..."
"After the heat death of the universe, Karsten. Anyway, one is Eshialand's magic number here."
"Grr... wait, magic number?"
"One win, and history is made. One win, and the Owls are GUARANTEED to go to at least the playoffs for the first time in history. With three games left to get that win from, there is a lot left to play for here."
"I sense a but incoming..."
"But..."
"Here we go..."
"...those last three games are home against Baker Park, away in Hapilopper, and home against Cardenao. Numbers 3, 4, and 2 on this table."
"Oh dear Maggie..."
"This is the hardest stretch of the schedule, but the Owls are so close. Just one more team, just one more. We'll be cheering for you the whole way. LET'S GO OWLS!!!"
"LET'S GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!"

"Did you hear any of that Kenny?"

After seeing the latest Tournament Report broadcast, Haulafo Paka'ula just had to give Kenny Morgan a call. His team hadn't been doing well lately, with the Seagulls floundering in an abysmal seventh place. The best seventh place across all 20 qualifying groups, sure, but a seventh place nonetheless. There wasn't too much for him to feel good about this cycle... until he'd seen Josh and Karsten's show.

"Of course I did Haulafo... but why are you asking...?"
"Remember what I said at the start of the cycle?"

It took a while for Kenny to remember, but eventually it came to him.

Haulafo Paka'ula wrote:May the best team win. Heck, may the best team qualify. If one of us ends up finally making it, I don't care which one of us, that'll be a win in my book. You've earned it a lot more than we have, and I'd just be happy to be a part of the journey.

"You won, and now it's your turn to qualify. Kenny, I'll be rooting for ya out there."

"Alright team..." Kenny said to the Owls before their game against Baker Park, "this is it, the final stretch. Three more games left, and we need to win one of them. Will they be easy games? Absolutely not. No way. But together, we can do this. We will do this..."

"Are you so sure about that?" Faith Krupp asked.

"Of course I am. Was I sure we'd bounce back at home against Rea San Vegas? Was I sure we'd get the second win against Aleirave? Was I sure we could get this far? Yes yes and yes, and look what happened. Now, we're one step away, and I'm sure that's a step we can take, but I can't do it without you... you're the team after all, I'm just the coach cheering you on and helping you along."

"Come on Coach, it's a lot more than that..." Alice Carroll had to say, "if it weren't for you bringing us together, we'd be flopping around out there like we did in the AOCAF, and you know it. You brought us back together after Sarah and Alex left, and it's thanks to you that we've gotten this far."

"How about we just agree that it took all of us. Every single one of us. We've done this together, and together, we can achieve everything we've ever dreamed of. I don't care whether we can win the last game we need, I don't care if we qualify, because we've gotten here together, and together we'll shoot for the stars today, tomorrow, and forever.

"Now, I'm not usually one to keep up the sentimental stuff for too long, so let's get out there and win this thing. Let's show the world what Eshialand is made of."

by **Yue Zhou** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 1:28 pm

Elaine Ashdown has brought Yuezhou unprecedented stability. They now need to back her fully.
Kevin Weiss, WorldTactics.net

METROPOLON, DRAWKLAND -- Yuezhou have not only qualified for the World Cup for a third consecutive cycle, but they've done it in style. Perfect through ten matches, a 3-1 win over Drawkland in the challenging National Pitch made the Dragons one of the first teams in the world to qualify. It's the first time Yuezhou have ever qualified directly, and for a nation that tends to wait until the last possible moment to succeed for fail - World Cups 91-94 saw them play seven playoff matches, six of them draws - it's a welcome change of pace. Under Elaine Ashdown, Yuezhou have gone from a team perpetually on the bubble - 94 and 95 are the only cycles in which qualification has been assured with more than fifteen minutes to go - to a team that can consistently qualify, and even bloody a few noses once they reach the World Cup proper.

But Yuezhou have been ascendent before, and each time, they've been unsettled by YFA mismanagement. Lu Jialan had miraculously brought the team to World Cup 88 - but the YFA's open flirting with Kang Guilin to replace Lu led to a complete breakdown in communications and the manager's resignation. The YFA statement said that Kang would be able to bring the team to even greater heights than Lu, who took a team ranked seventy-ninth entering the cycle to four points at the World Cup. But instead, the shakeup led to a prolonged period of stagnation for the Dragons, and it would be a decade before Chen Huikang guided the team back to the promised land. Chen himself was cast aside for Elaine Ashdown in a move that was widely panned by Dragons fans. And while the decision has worked out, Ashdown's Dragons making the knockout rounds of the World Cup for the first time in Yue history, the process remains questionable. After all, Chen was immediately hired by Cassadaigua and won three straight tournaments to start his tenure there, even if this cycle has been somewhat bumpier for the manager.

More importantly, the YFA has learned all the wrong lessons from Ashdown's success, apparently deciding that it proves that they need to meddle more in what their managers do. Kang Guilin was brought back as a "consultant", a role that the YFA was happy to confer increasing power despite Ashdown's objections behind closed doors. It's unclear what they hoped to get out of Kang's continued presence on a national team that he only managed to a third-place qualifying finish, but Kang physically fighting star midfielder Wan Sheping in a sequence that led to the latter's premature retirement was probably not it. Ashdown was able to at least keep Wan on the team for the rest of that cycle, something that less established managers may not have been able to get. But the YFA responded by installing Kang's nephew as U21s coach over Ashdown's preferred choice, assistant manager Liang Bo. An insulted Liang immediately bolted for the Red League's Pria City, something the Nepharan manager can't have been too happy with.

Now, three members of the WC94 coaching staff are gone, although Lu Qiang likely would've taken the Felswyr job no matter how hard Yuezhou tried to keep her. Worse, another might be following, as new leaks suggest the YFA have been reluctant to extend key assistant Corinne Mersiades behind closed doors. Mersiades has been a key tactical voice within Ashdown's office who is cited as instrumental to the team's recent success. Still, despite her experience in the Zenith and importance to the squad, the YFA have been unable to agree on a dollar amount with the coach, leaving her a risk to be the fourth WC94 coach to walk. Elaine Ashdown's five-year contract is up after the next Copa Rushmori, and the YFA's inability to keep any of her staff on board would have to weigh on her as she decides whether to stick it out with Yuezhou, or to leverage her success into a better post elsewhere.

Elaine Ashdown has brought the team to new heights, is widely respected by players across the world (something that might come into play as a wave of Yue dual nationals decides who to declare for), and has at least expressed interest in an extension. The YFA needs to recognize this and back her fully, or they risk yet another disruptive change of hands that could threaten the newly-stable Dragons' success.

by **Jeruselem** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 2:20 pm

In Archalit, after Jeruselem drew with the home team 4-4 ... Princess Stella Annabelle Dallas and Rennala Lunar

Stella: Well, another draw ... I guess it's better than losing.
Rennala: Yes well, we knew Glazgo love their draws but we should have won that one. Archalit have been steamrolling opponents recently so they were a different type of team.
Stella: I guess they thought they won this one too at one stage
Rennala: We have a little more firepower than some of those other teams, even if we never really show it. It only turns up when the opponent is being aggressive.
Stella: So a draw that should have been a win and draw with one of the teams that could qualify.
Rennala: I guess we aren't on a losing streak, but two draws isn't much use to us.

Stella: So three games left. We host Bigpipstan, away to Valanora and we host StrayaRoos.
Rennala: I guess we're just lucky we are 4th but we are only 1 point off 2nd spot because our rivals has lost games.
Stella: Valanora did do us a favour beating StrayaRoos 1-0 and then StrayaRoos did win the next one 2-1 against Natanians and Nosts who beat us at home. Archalit was on a winning streak until we broke it today. And Valanora are pretty much going win the group ...
Rennala: What about the others?
Stella: Britonisea look like being last, Bigpipstan are eliminated and Glazgo are eliminated as well. Natanians and Nosts, they won't get near 2nd spot with three others ahead of them. Natanians and Nosts do have +9 goal difference but that's due to their 7-0 win recently.
Rennala: So we're back to 4th?

Stella: Archalit 2nd and StrayaRoos 3rd but on 19 points, we have 18. There's nothing between 2nd and 4th.
Rennala: We would be on 21 points if we had beaten Glazgo.
Stella: Yes well, the loss to Natanians and Nosts and the draw against Glazgo is 5 points we should have had
Rennala: In theory, we could finish on 27 points if we won all the last games but Valanora is one of them. So we must beat StrayaRoos, and Bigpipstan ... and upset Valanora if we can.
Stella: They haven't lost a game, with one draw
Rennala: Hopefully, they get a little complacent since they have qualified

Stella: Our goal difference is a little low at +5, Archalit have +11 goal difference. StrayaRoos despite all those goals only +1.
Rennala: Still, it's not looking that great.
Stella: We can still make it, we're still in the fight.
Rennala: We'll still need Archalit and StrayaRoos to lose games
Stella: Anyway, how are the kids?
Rennala: Oh them, being a complete nuisance but then that's normal.

Stella: If your kids don't annoy you, they doing something wrong.
Rennala: Yes, your kids are very chatty. Well, I wonder where that comes from ...
Stella: No idea! Can't be their annoying mother
Rennala: I couldn't manage if all my kids were like yours
Stella: My family is full of girls, I prefer girls
Rennala: Yes well, I'm from a family of ... what people call witches. So the women aren't just passive on our family.

Stella: There's a few in the team as well
Rennala: We don't use our magic to affect the results of games, we're not the evil type who only serve their self interest.
Stella: If your magic actually worked, you'd use it anyway.
Rennala: I guess so, we're not in control of this universe.
Stella: That's for sure, we still haven't won a world cup yet.
Rennala: Doesn't look like it's going to happen this time round.

by **Cabo Azure** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 4:25 pm

The Kytler Peninsulae 3–4 Cabo Azure
Starting XI: Sapeteiro | Costa, Furtado, Delgado (goal 59'), Soares | d'Cruz (off 70'), Andrade, Rathbone (c)| Ventura (off 55'), Magalhaes (goal 44'), Santos (goal 19', 90+2')
Subs: Gouveia (on 55'), Gontijo (on 70')
The Maçaricas come dangerously close to dropping their first points of the qualifying campaign, thanks to some unusually porous goalkeeping from backup Sapeteiro and a focused Kytlerian attack. Anselmo Santos, the Audioslavia-based journeyman currently plying his trade at KT KT Moreazerua showed why he belongs in the National League with a brace, including a howler in stoppage time to preserve the perfect Azurean record. Asked in a postgame interview whether he plans to remain in Audioslavia given the financial difficulties associated with the National League, Santos made vague reference to playing on a sheep pasture in front of modular bleachers and said he had no plans on moving, especially not back to Tumbra.

Santos's brace book ended the match, as he opened the scoring in the nineteenth minute with an instinctual off-foot strike that caught Zeelen completely out of position. The 1-0 scoreline would hold almost to the end of the first half, when all of a sudden Mikkelsen found himself free and in space overlapping Markusson and slotted a goal to the near post. The Maçaricas answered quickly with a chip shot from Magalhaes that preserved the lead going into half.

The equalizer came too close for comfort however, as Markusson burned young Tomas Delgado for a tap-in as the second runner into the box on a free kick from Vincent soon after the whistle blew for the second half. With the scoreline 2-2, the game opened up substantially, but the peninsular team took advantage of a counterattack after a bad giveaway by Rathbone to beat a worn-out Sapeteiro top shelf. Numerous shots from the Azurean forwards were rebuffed, causing AJ Zanetti to sub in tap-in merchant Vasco Gouveia. It was a missed shot from Gouveia that set up the equalizer; Andrade's corner curved perfectly, and Delgado redeemed himself with a beautiful header.

With the game tied and the Azureans' perfect record in the balance, the Maçaricas looked for a higher gear but did not find it, with the green-and-gold-clad team consistently rebuffing their attempts to move the ball in their offensive half. Finally, in stoppage time, Gontijo took the ball from a throw-in and found Santos in the corner of the eighteen, who fired across the mouth of goal and made the game winning goal.

Cabo Azure 2–1 Vielfaltig
Starting XI: Sapeteiro | Costa, Furtado, Delgado, Soares (goal 38')| Florencio, Andrade, Rathbone (c)| Cardoso (goals 11'), Magalhaes, Santos
Subs:
In many ways the inverse of the Kytler Peninusla game, despite the scoreline, though with a similar theme of defensive mistakes that kept the score closer than AJ Zanetti would like and may be punished should they recur in the final three matches of qualifying.

In front of a sold-out crowd at Stadio Sao Cristobal (a whopping five thousand people, but who's counting?), Vasco Cardoso put on a clinic, showing why he is a forward in the TPL despite playing midfield for country. His goal early in the first half was a simple matter of beating his defender and the keeper, while young Bandicoot Soares benefited from another bombing run from Cardoso on the overlap, leaving him with an open goal upon which to score.

The lone Vielfaltig goal would come late in the second after Adalberto Furtado slipped on the pitch and Delgado wasn't quick enough to cover for him; the Vielfaltig striker fired a rock that five-holed Sapeteiro, adding to the backup goalkeeper's woes.

Projected Starting XI @ Delaclava: Gomez | Soares, M'bah-Pinho, Furtado, Branco | Gouveia, Bastos, Florencio | Cardoso, Mendonca, Gouveia
Projected Starting XI vs. Astograth: Gomez | Soares, M'bah-Pinho, Furtado, Branco | Gouveia, Bastos, Cardoso | Santos, Mendonca, Gouveia

Portelo, Fifty-seven years ago {M-42}

It was the time of day known to Portelenos as luz dos tolos, fools’ light, the late afternoon when the town is shadowed by the Colina Real while the harbor remains in daylight for a few more hours. Tucked away in one of the dozens of narrow taverns that made up the city’s service industry, Raquel Vasquez nursed a cocktail and awaited her contact. She’d arrived through a back door that connected to the honeycomb of tunnels beneath the royal palace. The owner barely paid her any mind except to take her order; he was aware of the tunnel’s existence, as all his ancestors had been, and the royal treasury paid him a subsidy, via intermediaries, that ensured he would never sell.

Raquel was a handsome woman just past thirty, her jet-black hair cut in a sharp, military-style fade that accentuated her angular face. She’d been recruited to the Pretorianos straight out of secondary school; a gray-haired man had appeared at her school near the end of her final year, and then he’d been at her house for dinner, offering her a job that would take her away from Sao Cristobal, the bucolic island she hadn’t left since she was born. Her parents had been apprehensive, but supported her as she packed her bags and boarded the boat that would take her to Portelo.

Her life since then had not been easy, but the few times she’d returned to Sao Cristobal on leave, she’d left feeling grateful she’d taken the job. After a basic course of training in Cabo Azure, intended to make sure she could swim and fire a pistol, she’d been sent to a series of ever-more challenging trainings abroad, mostly Quebec but other places as well, increasing her martial skill as well as her skill in reading situations. All praetorians started out on escolta–bodyguard–detail, but that wasn’t where you stayed, not if you were any good. The praetorian organization was singular, neither fully civilian nor fully military, and over the years their insularity and proximity to the royal family had seen them fulfill advisory roles in parallel to the king’s established cabinet.

For her part, Raquel had been on escolta longer than she felt was necessary, even after her classmates had moved on to other things. Arturo, the gray-haired man who’d come to her parents’ house, had risen in the ranks to become chief of staff, a nebulous position that put him in charge of all the praetorians not assigned to escolta duties, and had also placed himself as a sort of rabbi to Raquel. He urged patience, telling her she was destined for great things, but recently great things had looked like bodyguarding Princess Abigail, the king’s daughter by his second wife. Abby was a polite, bookish girl and a much easier charge than the bratty crown prince, Prince Reinaldo, but ten years on escolta was not where Raquel had seen her career going.

All of which made this meeting much more interesting. Arturo had given her basic instructions–go to this location, show this sign, and wait–which bore all the hallmarks of a cutout meeting, but why he gave the assignment to her was less clear. Praetorians assigned to escolta were usually left out of the intelligence-gathering side of things, but Arturo had given her this job himself.
The contact finally showed near the end of luz dos tolos as darkness began to enshroud the streets in earnest. He was good-looking, conspicuously Quebecois by his appearance and dress, wearing a well-tailored blue suit. Entering the tavern he saw her and waved conspicuously, a gesture meant to allay suspicion. Wordlessly he sat down across from her and looked into her eyes, taking her hands in his. His hands were warm, and she could almost believe that the look in his eyes was, too.

“Are you Anisa?” he asked, loud enough for the other tables to hear.

“I am,” she said. It was the name she’d been told by Arturo to give.

“Pierre,” he replied, “Pleasure. You are the one who protects the princess, correct?”

“I am,” she repeated. Could that be what this was about?

“Tell me about her.”

Raquel sighed, stared past her contact for a moment. It was bad tradecraft not to have an answer ready to go, but she felt this went deeper than spy games. “She’s a good kid,” Raquel answered earnestly. “Quiet, reserved, but very studious. Understands people. Doesn’t speak unless she has something to say.”

“Pierre” nodded solemnly. “Let your boss know I’ll be in touch.”

by **Audioslavia** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 5:04 pm

Kilometre Zero
Kilometre Five
Kilometre Ten
Kilometre Sixteen
Kilometre Twenty-One

Jeremy instinctively glanced at his watch for the four-hundredth time to see how fast he was going, forgetting that he'd put the wrong watch on this morning, and that all his watch told him was that he was stupid and he couldn't tell the time on an analogue watch without his glasses, which were in the hotel along with his GPS watch. A nearby marker told him twenty-five kilometres had passed since the start-line. He was glad that the road was winding downhill, the cobbled streets of Shamrock underfoot. Soon they would be at the coast, via the Old Town of Glassworks, and down the cobbled streets towards Coopers Row, from which it would be a flat final ten or fifteen kilometres or so west to the old Exposition Grounds, and the finish line.

He found himself doing the math. 25 kilometres in. Three hours or so gone? That's a finishing time of 5 hours and... well if he kept at the same pace he would only have to run for another... another two and a half hours?

Two and a half hours. Jeremy cursed the concepts of speed, distance and time in their entirety as he rounded the corner onto Coopers Row.

Cooper's Row was a place he used to come as a student. Sure, it was centuries ago, but he could still remember the clinking of a crowd of revellers in the pubs and the murmured chatter of their glasses, rancid smell of carpet and the feel of the tobacco smoke under his feet, the flirtatious batting of the eyelashes of the whiskies behind the bar and the coarse, peaty mouthfeel of the occasional fling. It was all ass-backwards back then and it suited him. Everything was irrevocably broken, but in a way he recognised, and he'd spent his life settling comfortably around the cracks and shards. These days, people didn't smoke, didn't drink, at least not enough to keep the bars making money, and got a grip on their own insecurities before they ever had to smash them over the head of their children. Society had smoothed over the cracks and Jeremy increasingly found the smoother surface just made his own ride bumpier. He'd been off the cigarettes for years now, occasionally vaping in the back of a juice bar when he needed to unwind. Whisky, even if it hadn't embarked on a trend of becoming twice as dear every year, just served to give him acid reflux now. He'd tried a whisky with a cigar once, six months ago, and couldn't finish either. After a year of smoking only brightly coloured hand-held fruit-flavoured nonsense the taste of a cigar made him wretch, the cigarette he'd tried shortly afterwards doubly so. He even thought twice about beer nowadays too. All he had to do to stop himself drinking beer was asking himself what he hoped to accomplish. Happiness? His mood never hit those lows any more, meaning the nonsense high of the drunkard wasn't nearly so enticing. Social lubricant? People these days filled silences by showing you the nice things on their phone, and it didn't take much to turn that into whatever conversation you could ever want. Oblivion? He'd been there, it's black. I mean what else had he expected.

The lows were no longer low enough to warrant the search for either meaning or oblivion, to find a woman with whom to become one for a year or nothing for an hour, to find an answer in a bottle, or at least two new questions he'd yet to find words for, or silence in a tobacco or thought in caffeine. When he did crave these things, increasingly rarely, he found he'd nowhere to smoke without feeling he was somehow in someone's way, that neither beer nor coffee were allowed to be of honest size and strength any more without a statement being made that you couldn't quite get your mouth around. "I just want a black coffee" or "I just want a beer beer" made you one of 'them', and 'they' were fucking boring. The surface of society having been smoothed over, there was nowhere to rest without your broken edges causing rivets in the floor. And people were even too polite to tut at you.

And so without the lows, and the chemical highs that they necessitated, came the gaps. Gaps that had had to be filled. He'd bought a pair of running shoes as a joke. It reminded him of signing into RL States for the first time. "Everyone here is a nerd, I'm better than this, I'll just do it for a few weeks and then something else will drag my attention away". And now here he was. Because after you've run a hundred metres without stopping, you figure you can run two hundred, and then four, and then a kilometre, and then two, and then four, and then suddenly you are a Man with a Five Kay Pee Bee and you don't know what that is but what you are assuredly certain of is that under no circumstances should you actually tell someone what that is because oh my god, even as a runner, the idea of someone telling Jeremy their Five Kay Pee Bee made him feel like shitting in his hand, slicking his hair back and elvissing right out of the fucking window. "As a runner" he thought to himself. "If ever there was any more lame self-signifier". Five kilometres had become ten, which had one day become twenty, and now it was, apparently, time to make that twenty into a forty. He'd considered what what it might feel like to finish a marathon, but he hadn't spent one second thinking about how it might feel to finish a marathon. To complete one. To go from halfway to the end.

It felt like being able experience the physical pain of a panic attack while feeling the exact opposite of the mental symptoms. All the warning lights were on, but the manual read 'relax and ignore all warning lights' and the guy in charge had gone through enough training to be very, very good at his job.

There was one warning light which he knew he had to take notice of. Not a red one, heaven knows most of them were red. Not the yellow one, surprisingly, but definitely the brown one. The brown warning that seemed to have been creeping down the DEFCOM chart from four to three and, if he wasn't careful, a great big two.

He'd eyed plenty of bright blue Porta-loos on each and every road he'd been down, thus far, but saw none on the horizon as he jogged sweatily down Coopers Row. He did, however, see a sign, an A-board outside a familiar pub.

"Don't Trust A Fart - Marathoners Pee For Free"

He looked up at the name of the pub, blinked, and groaned.

The Suave Rooster had been around for years, a dive of a bar that had tried to turn its Spit And Sawdust image into more of a Mastication and Briquette visage. The new landlord, or 'proprietor' as he called himself, had tried to stop people referring to the Suave Rooster as the Old Soft Cock without any success whatsoever. Walking into it was like appearing in a low-budget sequel to Abilgail's Party. Walking out of it was a sad experience because you knew, if you waited a half-pint past leaving time, you'd get to witness a new record for The Most Cringiest Thing You've Ever Seen, just a short half-hour after the previous record had been smashed.

Jeremy read the sign and realised that, in the years since he'd last been in, someone had bought the place and renamed it the Thumbitt Inn. He'd initially been disappointed until he realised, and then he was more disappointed.

Still. If he didn't go soon, we were definitely looking at DEFCON Two.

He counted one 'Was that... was that Jeremy Jaff...' as he darted in and followed the sign to the toilets, just next to the bar. Finding the roll holder full, he allowed himself a second to relax and to contemplate, having finished his poop, that if he had jogged into any pub built in the last fifty years, he'd still be climbing up the stairs to the men's even now.

Having done his business, Jeremy ducked out of the toilet, avoided another 'isn't that...' on his way out of the pub and rejoined the race. Looking at the upcoming board, he wondered whether he was at kilometre thirty yet, or maybe even thirty-two? Maybe he'd....

26.

"Oh for crying out loud"

-- Some Months Earlier ---

"Still In Our Hands"
Alaba Resolute Despite OAM Disaster

Having helped confound a listless Audioslavia forward line for 86 minutes, Jean-Pierre de Braieres's late goal stuck the knife in on a frustrating night for the Bulls. The Oberour Ar Moro midfielder scampered onto a deflected Guivarch shot and angled a perfect side-footed curled pass into the opposite corner, with Creighton scrambling to get back in position having saved the initial shot, and in doing so knocked the Bulls from first place in the group.

The three-game run-in sees four teams battle it out for the top two spots - one automatic qualification for the World Cup, the second a bum-squeaker of a playoff game.

Group 15           Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts  Max
1 Brookstation     11    7   4   0    26   13  +13    25    34
2 Audioslavia      11    7   2   2    14    6   +8    23    32
3 Qasden           11    7   1   3    20    8  +12    22    31
4 Oberour Ar Moro  11    5   3   3    22   14   +8    18    27

Remaining Fixtures:
   Brookstation: ZEN (A) - OAM (H) - AUD (A)
    Audioslavia: QAS (A) - SAP (H) - BRO (H)
         Qasden: AUD (H) - ANC (A) - SAP (H)
Oberour Ar Moro: SAP (H) - BRO (A) - SHI (H)

A mis-firing Bulls side have won only two of their last five, including a defeat each to Brookstation and Oberour ar Moro, and have arguably the hardest run-in of all, needing to visit Qasden - Qasden! - away from home. Having only recently broken a hoodoo against the Red Blues, the prospect of visiting Qasden needing an invaluable away win against a team that have beaten them in five of their last six encounters is, to say the least, harrowing. It is, as Ager Alaba noted after the game, still 'entirely in our hands', with three victories in a row guaranteeing a place at next year's finals, but even if Qasden's demon should be slain again, and Saperetia dispatched four days later, a result will be needed against Brookstation in order to progress, and Brookstation have been utterly rock solid throughout the campaign so far. Any loss inflicted on the side will likely be the first of the campaign for the Dreamers.

Those in Qasden might be harbouring a sense of de-ja vu right now. Last cycle, a slow start gave way to a run of seven wins in nine games to scramble their way back up to the final playoff spot, with a win over Audioslavia on matchday twenty confirming their third place in the group. This time out, a similarly rough start to the campaign saw the side fifth from eight on matchday three, and the side were already seven points adrift of even the playoff spot after matchday five with only two wins and three defeats. From there, the side have amassed four wins and a draw against group leaders Brookstation to fight their way back to third, narrowing that 13-point gap down to just a single point behind next week's opponents Audioslavia. Should the Red Blues earn at least a point, two wins in their final two games - away to bottom side Ancherion and at home to second-bottom Saperetia - should be enough for at least a playoff spot.

Oberour Ar Moro bounced back from a 3-1 shellacking in Qasden to record that all-important away win in Audioslavia that keeps them just about in the hunt for an outside shot at the playoffs. Victory over struggling Saperetia at home, coupled with a stalemate between the Red Blues and the Bulls, would see the side keep within a win of second place, albeit with some goal difference that would have to be made up during a do-or-die away tie at unbeaten Brookstation.

As for Brookstation, the Dreamers will likely still require some sort of result against Audioslavia on final day to ensure their automatic passage to the World Cup, even if the side win their next two games.

Bookies' odds suggest a tie between the Bulls and Qasden, followed by wins for each over Saperetia and Ancherion respectively before the Bulls go into that final-day showdown with Brookstation with the chance of a victory propelling the side above their opponents. Alaba has confidently suggested the Bulls are more than capable not only of inflicting another defeat against Qasden, but of getting the job done at home to Saperetia and Brookstation to qualify automatically for the World Cup for the first time in a generation.

by **Deltt** » Sat Nov 25, 2023 10:32 pm

Kharakia 2-5 Delte
Reçeucian AI text generator 'DeepReçn' ^{OOC: it wasn't} in the far faraway for Sheeps & Cows & Salmons & Trouts Farmer's Bulletin

I've been briefed not to dwell overly long on the finer details of our match but suffice it to say the Away Team Mission played a generic game and mostly earned some interesting adjectives for their performance, particularly within the homogenous ninety minutes of very normal time.

At the same time, or maybe a few minutes before...

Delte 3-0 Macbon
Sports Correspondent Kim Samrodd at Ildemorton Road for the Oswark Parish Advertiser

I won't dwell overly long on the finer details of this match, and it goes without saying that Enor Perro was our best player yet again, and definitely goes without saying that I'm on holiday and using a Reçeucian AI text generator for my match report ^{OOC: I'm not} but certainly mention should be made of 'DeepReçn's' programme notes. Surprisingly apposite, I thought.

I hear the away team played a blinder, although this may be a fabrication.

The Quick & The Delts: Faraway Sauce
4/6: The Stamina of Ringer Smith

As noted by Doc Ustingham

“Before that,” continued Ringer Smith, between intermittent deep breaths through his regenerated and thoroughly clean lungs, referring to when he single-handedly founded Anaia, made Their Majesties The High Kings and Queens Of The Trolls implode, retired to his Quiet Cottage On The Edge Of The Cosmos, fell asleep while fishing and dropped through a fluid time hole in the fabric of the multiverse, “I’d been first mate on the Rotten Ship Qassocks, under Captain Argent - him being my manager in a previous job during the mid-sixties - and became a prolific writer of sea shanties. I wouldn’t claim we were the first footballing pirate ship but we certainly could’ve taught the HMS Baggie a thing or two back in the day. I had quite a poetic turn, you know. Until I got marooned on an island of tequila-drinking head-shrinkers. I’d still be drunk there today if it hadn’t been for the whole Anaian Nation shipshow…

“Did I say shipshow?”

Test Subject PS65-cc, or Ringer Smith to give him his lab nickname, was of course describing his backstory for the lucidity test at the end of his stay at the Fountain of Youth Spa Resort in the Garga Marshes. It is one of several tests we have conducted on the effects of the revitalising bogwaters up in the gnat-bitten highlands. Not to mention, of course, the application of my famous and very delicious Faraway Sauce.

The stamina of Ringer Smith, though. For a centenarian and a half, he goes for longer than an undertaker’s face; longer than the spear of Aaron, longer than a Quebecois epic, longer than an obituary; he goes for longer than her sorrow, the passage of numberless ages in slumberless song, longer even that an irate and righteous Discord pile-on.

(Although I did say I wouldn’t mention my RecQ Helicase Booster syrup, which I’m branding as Faraway Sauce, I should probably point out to those of you skeptical of the science, that RecQ helicase is a family of helicase enzymes initially found in Escherichia coli that has been shown to be important in genome maintenance. They function through catalyzing the reaction ATP + H2O > ADP + P and thus driving the unwinding of paired DNA and translocating in the 3' to 5' direction. These enzymes can also drive the reaction NTP + H2O > NDP + P to drive the unwinding of either DNA or RNA.)^[1]

[1]Fair attribution: Wikipedia, I think. In any case, I'm not qualified to give a convincing account of how enzymes translocate paired DNA gizmos, so I looked it up and copied it out to make it sound convincing. It's not especially important, because at it's core, this whole premise is nonsense which I made up at my desk when prevaricating over other more important work.

by **Indusse** » Sun Nov 26, 2023 12:50 am

Hind Tribune
Cuisine > An Overview

By Subrato Shahla

Food is not just about eating; it's like a special language that shows culture, history, and personal stories. Cuisine, which is all about making food, is like a journey for our senses. It's the sounds and smells of a busy kitchen, the comforting smell of home-cooked food, and the beautiful colors on a plate that tell us about a place's land and weather. Whether the food is really spicy or has gentle flavors, cuisine is like an invitation to explore, enjoy, and connect with others. It's like a language that everyone can understand, reminding us that even though we're different, we can find things in common when we share a meal. This very feature about food and cuisine makes the indussean cuisine, the people's favourite.

Indussean Cuisine, the culinary gem of the country Indusse, is a delightful fusion that draws inspiration from the rich tapestry of Indo-Asian Flavours, seasoned with a touch of progressiveness. The special mix of flavors makes the food really tasty and shows the different cultural influences that have shaped how Indusse cooks its food. In Indussean Cuisine, vibrant spices and aromatic herbs take center stage, crafting a symphony of flavors that dance on the palate. The influence of Culture and Tradition is evident in the use of coconut, curry leaves, and tamarind, infusing dishes with a distinctive taste and depth. Meanwhile, the culinary artistry borrowed from the traditional island cuisines introduces a symphony of spices, adding layers of complexity to the dishes.

When you enjoy Indussean Cuisine, you'll taste a mix of delicious textures and flavors. From tasty curries and fragrant rice dishes to yummy street food, there's a variety of dishes to try. Whether it's the fragrant rice dishes, hearty stews, or the array of delectable desserts, Indussean Cuisine is a celebration of culinary diversity, a testament to the country's cultural amalgamation. Each bite tells a story of the influences that have shaped this cuisine into a unique and flavorful journey for the senses.

Indussean Cuisine boasts several world-famous dishes that captivate food enthusiasts globally. One such star is the "Spiced Coconut Curry," featuring the creaminess of coconut milk blended with a combination of aromatic spices. Vegetables and Meat can be added to this gravy which makes it more flexible as well as tasty. Another standout in the cuisine is the "Tandoori Delicacies," showcasing the North Indian touch in Indussean Cuisine. soft marinated meat, often skewered and grilled to perfection in a tandoor, offer a smoky and wonderful experience for the taste buds.

The main attraction and a personal favourite of many, is the varities of Biriyanis that takes the center stage. This aromatic rice dish, layered with spiced, marinated meat is a culinary masterpiece that reflects the rich culinary heritage of Indusse. The Masala that's found in these aromatic and wonderful Biriyanis takes one to another level of experience. You could find Vegans in Indusse, fighting over the establishment of a vegetarian variety of biriyani as they call it the "Veg Biriyani". But to be true to the roots, it's not even a type of biriyani but another dish called as Pulao. The Pulao is also tasty with carrots, beans and onions in them. The special salad or raitha is sure to make both biriyani and pulao tastier that it's when it's alone.

Indussean street food is famous worldwide, especially the "Spicy Street Chaat." People love this tasty mix of crispy snacks coated in tangy chutneys and spices, bursting with flavors. And if you're exploring Indussean Cuisine, you can't miss the "Sugary Sweet Jalebi." This delightful dessert, with its swirly deep-fried batter soaked in sugary syrup, is known globally for its sweet and irresistible charm. It's a treat that leaves a lasting impression on dessert lovers around the world. These dishes, representative of Indussean culinary excellence, have earned international reputation, bringing food lovers around the world and showcasing the rich, diverse, and globally celebrated flavors of Indussean Cuisine.

World Cup 95 Stats

 Damukuni  1 - 4 Indusse
Steven Shuto 41'
Paulson 61'
Mersiàs 77'
Bhattacharya 84'
Grundjee 90+2'
--------
Indusse 3 - 1 Sharktail
Razen Saif 28'
Mersiàs 52'
Butea 77'
Grundjee 86'

Group 13 First Half - Indusse Fixtures
MD1 : Indusse 2 - 1 Vilwandia
MD2 : Ethane 0 - 0 Indusse
MD3 : Indusse 2 - 0 Damukuni
MD4 : Sharktail 1 - 1 Indusse
MD5 : Indusse 4 - 3 Banija
MD6 : The Holy Empire 2 - 2 Indusse
MD7 : Indusse 3 - 3 Santa-Barbara
Group 13 Second Half - Indusse Fixtures
MD8 : Vilwandia 1 - 0 Indusse
MD9 : Indusse 2 - 0 Ethane
MD10 : Damukuni 1- 4 Indusse
MD11 : Indusse 3 - 1 Sharktail
MD12 : Banija v Indusse
MD13 : Indusse v The Holy Empire
MD14 : Santa-Barbara v Indusse

by **Saint-Jean-Jacques et Burnham-on-Stove** » Sun Nov 26, 2023 1:48 am

Saint-Jean-Jacques et Burnham-on-Stove's matchdays 6 to 11 recap

Mengwi, Kanginan, Pemecutan -
Saint-Jean-Jacques et Burnham-on-Stove is now sitting in 3rd place in group 10 atfter 11 matchday, fighting with Pemecutan and Elmyia for a spot at the World Cup. After a 4-1-0 start, the Tapirs received Patriotlandia at home on matchday 6 and won 1-0 thanks to a goal at the 34th minute by Louis-Philippe Berlinguette. The Jean-Jacquois and Burnhamese travelled to Elmyia on matchday 7 and lost 4-1. The Sole Tapir goal was scored by Ashton Gockley at the 51st minute.

On matchday 8, Saint-Jean-Jacques-sur-Mer travelled to Frontiere. The Tapirs were leading 3-1 at halftime with goals from Allie O'Hara, Scarlett McCaskill and Frédérique Goudreau-Luneau. Frontiere cuts Saint-Jean-Jacques-sur-Mer's lead at the 64th minute with a penalty goal, then 5 minutes later, Frédérique Goudreau-Luneau scores a header goal with Charlotte Gibouleau-Beaudoin assisting the goal. Frontiere scored again at the 78th minute and the final score was 4-3 Saint-Jean-Jacques-sur-Mer.

The Tapirs played in Adab City, Adab on matchday 9 and this game was a real thriller. Phoebe McCormack replaced Félix Bourguignon in the starting 11, who was suspended for too much yellow cards in the tournament. Saint-Jean-Jacques et Burnham-on-Stove scored first, at the 19th minute, when Alyssa McCaskill made a short pass to Louis-Philippe Berlinguette who kicks it into the net. Adab tied the game at the 26th minute when Enlilbani Yargab scored on a direct free kick. This is the score at halftime. Adab took the lead at the 49th minute when Rebekah Yissakar scored on a header pass from Amara Emmita. The Tapirs tied the game at the 61st minute when Nathan Fauteux-McGrath scored on a corner kick. His kick touched nobody and went directly into the net. The score was 2-2. Adab attacked at the 75th minute when Kastiliasu Akaptaha faked to kick and made a short pass to Nadje Barzani who kicks the ball past Serge Bleau-Bean. Saint-Jean-Jacques et Burnham-on-Stove tied the game at the 85th minute when Scarlett McCaskill made a long pass to Frédérique Goudreau-Luneau. Goudreau-Luneau kicked the ball and it's a goal. The game is tied at 3-3 and this is the final score. Louis-Philippe Berlinguette injured himself during 2nd half and will be replaced with Clara Kurtz in the starting XI for matchday 10. He's expected to miss the next 4 games and be back in the starting XI for matchday 14.

19th minute      Goal        Louis-Philippe Berlinguette
26th minute      Goal        Enlilbani Yargab (free kick)
49th minute      Goal        Rebekah Yissakar
61st minute      Goal        Nathan Fauteux-McGrath (corner kick)
75th minute      Goal        Nadje Barzani
85th minute      Goal        Frédérique Goudreau-Luneau

12th minute      Yellow card     Pierre-Antoine Bigeault-Généreux
26th minute      Yellow Card     Phoebe McCormack
37th minute      Yellow Card     Alulim Sinmuballit
56th minute      Yellow Card     Scarlett McCaskill	
72nd minute      Yellow Card     Renato Ramirez De Jesus

Saint-Jean-Jacques-sur-Mer was back at home on matchday 10 and beat The Licentian Isles 5-0. Félix Bourguignon is back in the starting XI. Louis-Philippe Berlinguette is still out with a lower body injury. Emily Schmidt and Nathan Fauteux-McGrath will not play and they're replaced with Phoebe McCormack and Kyle Klingenberg in the starting XI. Serge Bleau-Bean is not in goal and Keegan Threadgold replaces him. The Jean-Jacquois and Burnhamese scored at the 9th minute when Clara Kurtz made a cross to Allie O'Hara who kicks the ball past the goalkeeper. Frédérique Goudreau-Luneau scored on a penalty at the 22nd minute. At the 41st minute, Alyssa McCaskill makes a short pass to Clara Kurtz who kicks it and it's a goal. The score is 3-0 at halftime. At the 66th minute, Saint-Jean-Jacques-sur-Mer has a corner kick. Kyle Klingenberg kicks, Tristan Gibouleau-Beaudoin jumps higher than anybody and heads the ball into the net. Ashton Gockley makes a cross to Frédérique Goudreau-Luneau at the 87th minute, who kicks the ball and it's a goal. The final score is 5-0.

9th minute       Goal        Allie O'Hara
22nd minute      Goal        Frédérique Goudreau-Luneau (penalty)
41st minute      Goal        Clara Kurtz
66th minute      Goal        Tristan  Gibouleau-Beaudoin (corner kick)
87th minute      Goal        Frédérique Goudreau-Luneau

14th minute      Yellow Card     Tristan  Gibouleau-Beaudoin 
22nd minute      Yellow Card     Player #4
54th minute      Yellow Card     Allie O'Hara
82nd minute      Yellow Card     Kyle Klingenberg

The Jean-Jacquois and Burnhamese travelled to Mengwi, Pemecutan for matchday 11. All the regulars except Louis-Philippe Berlinguette were back in the starting XI Clara Kurtz still replaces Berlinguette. Both teams had good chances to score. Saint-Jean-Jacques et Burnham-on-Stove had a penalty at the 32nd minute. Frédérique Goudreau-Luneau kicks the ball, Yohan Ekaputra dives on the right side and stops the ball. Goudreau-Luneau couldn't believe she didn't score. At the 67th minute, Agus Kusumawijaya makes a cross to Ketut Agus Astapa who kicks the ball but Serge Bleau-Bean makes a fantastic save. Some incident happened at the 79th minute when two players wanted the ball on a goal kick. Rian Kusuma pushed Scarlett McCaskill who fell on the ground. Alyssa McCaskill punched Kusuma in the face. Kusuma wasn't hurt from the punch to the face but he got a yellow card and Alyssa McCaskill had a red card. The final score was 0-0. Pierre-Antoine Bigeault-Généreux will miss matchday 12 against Hafamarimyht for having too much yellow cards. Alyssa McCaskill will miss the same match for having a red card. Emily Schmidt and Scarlett McCaskill will be healthy scratches. Louis-Philippe Berlinguette is still injured. Renato Ramirez De Jesus, Nathan Bourguignon, Ludwig Baumgartner, Marcelin Nkoulou and Clara Kurtz will be in the starting XI. Serge Bleau-Bean will also rest and Charles-Émile Moineau will be in goal against Hafamarimyht. Everyone except Berlinguette will be back in the starting XI for matchday 13 against Patriotlandia.

No goal

21st minute      Yellow Card     Clara Kurtz
32nd minute      Yellow Card     Pande Satria Dirga
55th minute      Yellow Card     Pierre-Antoine Bigeault-Généreux
79th minute      Yellow Card     Rian Kusuma
79th minute      Red Card        Alyssa McCaskill

Paul-André Veilleux

by **Bostopia** » Sun Nov 26, 2023 3:17 am

'Food shortages already' scoffed the Emperor, perusing the latest summary of Mertagnian news that his Intelligence Corps had managed to intercept. The blockade of Mertagne's incredibly important northern port towns was certainly having an effect. 'Well, "if aint broke, don't fix it" is the old adage, isn't it?' The Emperor looked around the room. One of his aides was there, and concerningly, a couple of The Duke's were standing around doing a terrible job of looking busy whilst they were clearly absolutely bone idle and waiting for something to happen. The Emperor could only guess what it was and rolled his eyes so heavily he was convinced someone must have heard it.

'Well!' The Emperor said loudly. 'Let's see if we can't help them with that little problem then, shall we?' The Duke's aides flicked their eyes up at the Emperor for a moment, convinced he was about to order the lifting of the blockade on some great humanitarian mission, perhaps sue for peace, oh actually no, he had grabbed instead what he liked to call his 'military playbook', a selection of tactics and scenarios that the Bostopian armed forces had ready to play out at any moment should the need arise. The various aided hadn't heard him mumble something about 'less starving Mertagnians in the first place' as he opened the book and his fingers leafed through the tabs, reading off names of nations the Bostopians had various levels of preparedness for. The Starblaydians (a lot of this was 'ask for a friendly chat', in all honesty, hoping they'd catch the country's leaders on a benevolent day) those for Legalese (artillery barrages were just the starter course), one still for Dancougar (while not known to anyone in Anaian Bostopia (for Bostopia had always been in Anaia), the Emperor had never forgiven Dancougar for having beaten Bostopia in a World Cup semi-final when Bostopia were at their peak as a top 5 side in the world - it had been all downhill from there), then of course plenty of guidance on Krytenia, before finally reaching the pages for Mertagne.

Whilst the playbook for the current war wasn't exactly extensive, not having expected it, Bostopian intelligence still knew what to hit and how to hit it hardest. Although Operation Autumnal Shed wasn't entirely sinisterly named, the Emperor couldn't help but grin a grin that sent shivers down the spine of those in the room when he double tapped it with his finger and picked up the phone to the Commanders at the Ministry of Defence not far down the road.

'Emperor, this is Joint General Windsham'. 'Windsham' the Emperor said abruptly. 'Operation Autumnal Shed. I'm going to ask how ready you are for it and you're going to tell me immediately, is that clear?' 'Yes, Emperor, crystal.' 'Good. Now, Windsham, how ready is the air force for Operation Autumnal Shed?' 'We can have that launched within the hour, Emperor, though of course I'll need The Duke's signoff as-' 'Do you understand who you're talking to?' 'Yes' came the reply. 'Operation Autumnal Shed, Joint General. I want it launched or I'll have you jointed in the literal sense. Is that crystal clear?' 'Yes, Emperor. We'll launch.'

The Emperor put the phone down and his feet up on his desk, reclining back in his chair and wishing he had a cold beer as he waited for further word. He passed half an hour idly scrolling up and down his phone, reading the latest OSINT accounts and footage from the war, knowing that at BAF Tarnlight Bay, finally repaired, planes were being prepared to help the Mertagnians along with their food shortages and need for rationing. He had gotten up from his desk and was instead scrolling through his phone from a balcony of the Ducal Palace, overlooking central Newfort when his phone finally rang, informing him that Operation Autumnal Shed was a go and the birds were in the air. He thanked the Joint General for his time and wandered off the balcony and back through his office, aware but unconcerned of The Duke's aides who had silently watched his every step. Once the Emperor had finally left, the first spoke.

'The Emperor's launched Operation Autumnal Shed.' 'Yes' the second agreed, 'but do you know what that is?' 'No, I don't' the first replied. 'Shall I inform The Duke?' 'There is...' the Duke sighed '...there is no need' The Duke said rather shakily, levering himself free from the filing cabinet next to the one Emperor Boston had pulled the playbook from. 'For it is I' he said solemnly. 'And I have heard everything.' The Duke, usually so playful and mischevous in these scenarios was terribly subdued. 'My Duke!' The first aide cried, running over to him and catching him in her embrace as his legs crumpled beneath him, though now she thought she too would fall under the weight of this mighty man, only to be supported as well by the second aide who had come running over with a cry of '[i]My[i] Duke!' 'Thank you girls' he told them, feeling disappointed when his legs found their strength again, though rather deciding to ignore it and be coddled a little longer. 'My Duke, do you know what Operation Autumnal Fall is?' 'Of course' The Duke replied, 'For it is I, The Duke, who knows all things of the Bostopian playbook that the Emperor brought with him. It was initially disappointing to read it was actually military plans' The Duke told them, looking up into two pairs of eyes, one brown and one blue, noting the sadness in them. 'I had been hoping for at worst fanfiction, and at best some secret episodes of "Bostopia: The Twin Isles", but alas, instead, I stumbled upon this.' The Duke proceeded to tell them of what the Emperor had set into place, watching their stunned expressions turn to horror.

'Can't you stop him, my Duke?' The second aide asked, her hands clutched firmly infront of her white blouse. 'I cannot. I am but a Duke.' 'But my Duke!' The second said. 'You are a Grand Duke, holder of the Grand Duchy of Newford*, holding rank over the other Bostopian duchies, surely that counts for something!' 'While true, I am the Grand Duke' he said, with none of the regal tone attached to the title, 'I would still be outranked by the Emperor and there are too many that feat him and too many in the military who adore him. They're finally being put to use. I am afraid there is nothing we can do.'

It turned out there was nothing much Mertagne could do either, once the Bostopian heavy bombers had made it across the Mertagnian coast, safely passing the anti-aircraft fire that had forced the planes and their joint-role fighter escorts from side to side to evade them, lest they be brought down by a lucky - or unlucky hit. Pilots looking down would have seen the waters of the Bekk and the Mertagnian coast long disappear behind them as sandy shores turned to cities and towns to open fields of green and the ancient heart of Mertagne. The flight approached the borders of Fyle, the ancient home of the proto-Mertagnians and the Mertagnian breadbasket, once the breadbasket for half of Calania, the biggest food-producing area in the country, and they began descending to the optimal heights to release their grim payloads.

Half of the squadrons of fighters went first, accelerating away from the bombers they had been escorting, then slowing back down slightly as they passed over wide open fields and scattered farmhouses around smaller settlements, before the squadrons each split into two and headed for different Mertagnian towns across the region. The calls made by the squadron and flight leaders were repeated across each of the flights. 'Split and make ready canisters' came the call over the radio, as the flight passed over a larger Mertagnian town and split formation so the planes flew in different directions away from it, approaching the farmland on the outskirts and into the open countryside. While admittedly risky, this was the best way of distributing what was needed. As the Pilots had then been trained, it was they that decided when it was best to slow even further, fly lower, then open the canisters held below their wings to spray a fine mist down onto the crops growing beneath, before speeding back up and the flight, then entire squadron re-formed again at a sortie point that would send them back towards home.

The second half of the fighters stayed with the bombers, not holding spray-canisters beneath their wings, though did still have the additional fuel canisters, most of which would end up being dumped either over coastal Mertagne or in the Bekk itself. These fighters role were purely as escorts, keeping a watchful eye over the slower bombers as they neared their targets. The hum of the jet engines was ever-present enough for those on board to have been able to ignore it as they discussed locations, and when to release their own weapons. At their mark, what looked like cluster bombs fell from the bomb bays of the Bostopian aircraft, ready to detonate and spill out their own contents when they hit and buried themselves into the fertile brown Mertagnian soil, surrounded by the crops which were so vital to feed a nation of people, and surely bring the war to an earlier end.

by **Ochre Islands** » Sun Nov 26, 2023 3:18 am

Following the conflict between the Ochres and Bostopia, which was either a Second War of Independence or a diplomatic mission gone wrong (dependant on who exactly you asked), the Mertagnians had been invited to stay by the Ochre Islands. This worked for both sides, the Ochres having a level of foreign protection, and the Mertagnians having a presence in the south of Anaia's Ocean of Ayes.

It fell to the Prime Minister, who had only recently began the process of removing herself from her role as Minister of Defence in the light of upcoming elections on the Islands, the first since the end of the conflict. Willow had been keen to show that the Government was ready to move on and start facing brighter days again. Part of that was reviewing the new Mertagnian base being constructed between Unsley and Brigsham on Juniper Island's north-east coast.

While a lot of the building materials hadn't yet reached the Ochres due to the ongoing Bosto-Mertagnian conflict, the Ochres had been able to spare some material meant for domestic use in order to start seeing some Mertagnian presense, supplying the base with a slow but steady stream of pre-fabricated buildings so that the soldiers based there would have at least some shelter rather than the tents and sleeping bags they had arrived on the islands with whilst Mertagne was preparing to attack the Bostopian mainland, along with whatever limited supplies there own ships could carry, with the idea being that the Ochres would pay for the upkeep of the base as and when they could, as well as providing food to the base at very favourable rates.

'Captain Lenormand!' Willow was pleased to see the Captain, with whom she'd shared an auspicious first meeting, having walked into an Ochre hotel lobby on her own to face down whichever foreign troops were occupying it at the time, not knowing whether they were friendly or enemy. It could have been the rather swift end of her, or worse, capture, but instead turned out to be Mertagnian troops who had rapidly been sent down to the Ochres to stop the Bostopian advance.

'Good to see you Prime Minister' the Captain replied in a gentlemanly fashion, approaching Willow for a handshake. 'Though I hear it's Mrs. Prime Minister now?' He asked, tapping his own wedding ring. 'It is' Willow replied laughing. 'The time felt right. New beginnings. Starting afresh, some light out of the dark and so on.' The Captain smiled. 'New beginnings indeed' he said, spreading one of his arms towards the hubbub behind him where the Mertagnian base aside the Reedbed Ravine, which was usually dry but once the lower snows on the mountain at the centre of Juniper Island began to melt, it could quickly become waterfilled and occasionally very dangerous as the meltwater flowed towards the sea.

They turned as the Captain extended his arm again, shepharding the Prime Minister towards his office which, while guarded, still seemed a little makeshift. They entered and the Prime Minister sat down in a seat on one side of a desk as the Captain went round to his side, having placed a mug of pre-prepared coffee in front of the Prime Minister. He was about to sit down as his phone rang in his pocket, with a ringtone that implied urgency. He excused himself and answered. 'This is Captain Lenormand, I'm with the Ochre Prime Minister, is this-' he gripped an arm of his chair with increasing tightness as he listened to the information being relayed. 'And Dannin is sure of all of that?' Willow could read the concern on the Captain's face as he lowered himself into his seat. 'We knew they were physically capable but that they were morally capable of doing that-'. And now Willow's phone rang. 'Terrible news from Mertagne, Prime Minister. Everything has changed.'

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