World Cup 95 Roleplay Thread

by **Cardenao** » Mon Nov 20, 2023 9:18 pm

Mihaly’s Machinations (Part X)
(Part I, Part II, Part III, Part IV,
Part V, Part VI, Part VII), Part VIII,
Part IX)

“Certainly, let’s get to business,” Mihaly responded to Minister Finch, flashing a smile to Penelope Baker, “Madam Prime Minister, a pleasure to see you again.” He was referencing the Koroa Summit where Anaian nations big and small came together to discuss the then-breaking situation in the Ochre Islands. Mihaly had been impressed by the statecraft the pair had displayed, keeping a room full of politicians on task is a herculean undertaking, doubly so when The Duke is in attendance, but they had done so and helped craft what was somewhat a resolution.

This meeting was the result of a brief yet ultimately significant side conversation between Mihaly and Penelope. It had occurred during one the common breaks from the diplomatic talk when the two found themselves alone in a quiet hallway. Mihaly, forever prioritizing the development of Cardenao above all else, saw the opportunity and spoke up. Earnest praise as to the Prime Minister’s handling of the situation, followed by gently suggesting that their two nations could have so much more to discuss outside of the Summit. Krytenia was a nation Mihaly had tremendous respect for, surely there could be a path to national friendship? A path potentially paved with natural resources flowing from their abundance in Cardenao to Krytenia in exchange for something else. The conversation was brief, they were short on time, and while Prime Minister Baker was careful to conceal her reaction and didn’t give a concrete answer, Mihaly sensed she found his proposal intriguing and the game was on. Now, in the Grand Ballroom of Sandy Hall, the Cardenaoan sat with the Krytenians and one by one put their cards on the table.

The conversation started with the reiteration of Cardenaoan respect for Krytenia as a geopolitical actor in Anaia and how, in some aspects, Cardenao was in somewhat a similar position as Krytenia after their revolution against the old monarchy in 1981. Mihaly elaborated on this, saying that both nations took the bold step of opening themselves up to the international stage and that they were both undergoing a rapid economic boom. While Cardenao is currently far more underdeveloped, and thus needing more work to be done, than Krytenia was at that point in their history, that didn’t mean lessons couldn’t be learned (ideally avoiding a Cardenaoan version of the Xilean conflict), information and guidance offered, and that perhaps there was a way for the two nations to help one another.

Every Cardenaoan lives with a small bit of fear in the back of their mind that conquerors of Eshan will return. Wherever the Red Hand went, pain followed for the people of Cardenao, eventually culminating in the Great Suffering, when the Echani destroyed the seawalls protecting Central Cardenao resulting in millions dead, countless population centers including our capital, and the destruction of the majority of our arable land. It’s been 112 years since that event and the subsequent Echani withdrawal, but there is a very real fear that this would come to be again. Of course, the Echani haven’t been seen in nearly a century, but that sort of national trauma doesn’t easily fade away, and so the matter of national defense had become of paramount importance to Mihaly now that he was adequately upgrading many basic social needs in Cardenao. He’d already made huge strides in modernizing Cardenao’s military, the ships he traded for with the Ochre Islands gave them a basic navy, with the further additions of a Banijan missile cruiser and a Quebecois aircraft carrier giving them a little extra muscle. The trade agreement with Pyazhnaya granted access to military technologies far beyond anything Cardenao would be able to organically produce for the next several decades, while Cardenaoan troops gained combat experience as they fought off Bostopian assaults in the Ochre Islands. Things were developing, maybe not as quickly as Mihaly would like, but slowly yet surely things were coming together. Which made this meeting so important.

It wasn’t exactly a secret that the Krytenian air force was one of the best in Anaia. Between the aircraft, the strategies employed, exemplary attention to logistics, and general training of all personnel, they were a mark Mihaly was eager for the Cardenaoan air force, which didn’t quite exist, to eventually match one day. Hell, even the early history of Krytenia is marked by that fateful airstrike on the Xilean Presidential Palace, these guys were legit. As he spoke to Penelope and Sarah, Mihaly professed his honest admiration of the Krytenians in this area, how they were among the best in Anaia, perhaps the world, and how he hoped to build a respectable Cardenaoan force. He carried on, turning his speech towards his real goal, striking an agreement that resulted in Cardenao receiving military aircraft and relevant training from Krytenia. It was ambitious but it was an ask that needed to be made.

In return, Mihaly continued as he noticed what seemed to be a mixture of shock and bemusement that he would have the gall to straight up ask for advanced military weaponry, Cardenao could offer Krytenia many things. Natural resources was the obvious one, Cardenao was very wealthy in this way but historically lacked the competence to turn that to its advantage, so that was an easy lob into the Krytenian court. Beyond that……Mihaly didn’t really have much, Cardenao hadn’t yet developed the social or economic capital to have significant things to put up in trade conversations. Mihaly could grant access to the highest level of Banijan and Quebecois governments if that was something Penelope was interested in. Beyond that though, Cardenao didn’t have much to offer.

Mihaly was interrupted by his smartwatch gently buzzing twice. He glanced down and saw a message from Toyuwa Okafor, his friend and former Banijan ambassador to Cardenao. It was a brief message but one he was thankful Okafor texted him: ‘AMBD=Sanneh.’ So it seemed Banija had decided on a new ambassador to Cardenao, Jumu Sanneh. Mihaly had to suppress a laugh as he brought himself back into his present conversation, ‘Those Banijans and their obsession with appointing former athletes to political posts.’ He carried on with his discussion with the Krytenians, but the baseline had been established: your aircraft and training for my resources and whatever you might want.

With that, he ended his monologue and ceded the conversation over to the cyan blues. Hopefully they would find value in his proposition.

Despite Win And Draw, La Furia Azule Remain Unconvincing

After a not bad but definitely not ideal start to the World Cup Qualifying campaign, the Cardenao national team looked a shade more like their usual selves over the last two matches as they took four from six points. While the win and two losses after the first three matchdays certainly didn’t knock Cardenao out of the tournament, let’s not overreact shall we, it was a slightly worrying tone to set.

The match against Aleirave was a disappointing yet entertaining result as the two teams battled it out to a 3-3 result. It’s always tough traveling to another team’s stadium, the home fans, the unfamiliar winds and temperature and gut feelings, it could all make for a mess and indeed it did as the Blue and Golds struggled to get an offensive tempo going. Haritz Larrainzar scored our first, the captain standing tall as he controlled a cross from Salva Perez with his chest and rifled it into the top corner. The timeless Juanma Saez, the 8th highest goalscorer of all time in the Tikariot Premier League, fired home the second while Dimitri Micalizo, who recently won the title and Golden Ball with Cardonia FC, came off the bench to score his first goal for the national team at the age of 24. When a win is the expectation, a high-scoring draw isn’t an encouraging sign.

Fortunately, the lads had an easy follow-up game against the City of Myrtle Beach, ranked 206 in the world. Should be a nice and easy victory without much complication, right? Very wrong my friend, very wrong. No, Cardenao, the 44th best team playing the game, actually lost the possession battle in this game as the visitors narrowly took the edge. While we managed to generate seven shots, with five of those on target, the only one that ever looked like going in was Chímo Ventura’s 64th minute shot that did go in. That is woeful, simply not what we've come to expect from the players representing our country, and these results continue to raise questions about the direction of the national team.

Truth be told, the old magic simply isn’t there at the moment. Is the team trying too hard to secure their place in history? It seems the joy the boys used to play with is gone, the stress of expectation choking the freedom out of their game as they thirst to score. The next two matches, like the two prior and the two to come afterwards, are vital as we face off against Rea San Vegas and Eshialand. The expectation is to take all six points, now it’s on the team to rise to the challenge.

by **Huayramarca** » Mon Nov 20, 2023 9:24 pm

Land of Wind, Mountains and Bright Sun – Chapter I, Episode 3 – How on Earth Did They Get There?!

“This is not Kewlz” said David after watching a match of the Huayramarcan National Team, in which the Condors were defeated 1-2 by Kewlz at home “But I know what will be kewl for me.” He took a sandwich and prepared a meal before sitting and start working for the next video… For which he hadn’t a single idea, but he wanted to capitalise the momentum he has been going through with the recent videos in social media. “What can I do?” wondered in loud voice, his mom was ushering where she would start to paint the wall, as she thought it was necessary to paint the house.

“David Huamán Vallecilla! What have you done?!” Screamed his mother, pretty annoyed because she said David’s full name “I have taken three hours of my life cleaning the rug and you threw ketchup on it!” David watched and saw a peculiar form in the stain, then added “Oh, crap” Then looked closer and said “Oh, look, the shape of the San Carlos Islands. This might be a signal for me.” He prepared the sandwich and cleaned the stain a bit, then went to the room and started doing some draws for the video. “I know I shouldn’t upload for the sake of it, I should take some time to plan and capitalise an idea, but this seems like a signal from above. I must do something related to the San Carlos Islands and take inspiration for it.

As he drew a lot, then prepared a mock for what he would say during the video, then quick research about the isles and that would suffice. “I think I’m already done for what I should do this day.” David prepared the camera, the lights, and the drawings, including a picture of the ketchup stain in the rug.

You might wonder what has to do a dirty rug with the video series, I guess? Well, creativity is crazy and ideas might come in unexpected ways. This one, for example, was when I prepared my sandwich and I said “Oh! It looks like the shape of the San Carlos Archipelago, so it is the time to talk about that enigmatic place of Huayramarca. This time, in a rather special way, as we will undercover most of the unknown details of the isles, not only in the historic side of things, but also in the geographic one because there’s a lot of interesting facts that haven’t been unearthed before.” Then took a pause and said “Come with me, let’s embark ourselves in this adventure through the Salamantic Sea and the Ocean of Ayes.

The San Carlos Isles are the ultimate outpost that Huayramarca has found, and perhaps any Anaian nation as of late. With a relatively young history as a province of Huayramarca, the San Carlos Archipelago hides some interesting facts that nobody has seen before, until today, as I’ll show them from what I’ve found in a recent trip to the Archipelago.

First, and foremost, the San Carlos Isles have a quite peculiar history, geologically speaking, as they were formed not by an active subduction zone as it happened with the Sierra, instead, it was created by the succession of multiple eruptions through time that have made not one, but created many isles in the middle of the Salamantic and Ocean of Ayes boundary. Of the 132 isles, 6 are inhabited and the rest are small atolls or places that are used as residences of rich people; but the entirety of the zone has a quite peculiar characteristic over the rest of Huayramarca, and that one is biodiversity, which is pretty unique if we compare it with the continent.

Biodiversity in the isles is spectacular, as there’s pretty much no similarities between the Mainland and the Archipelago. One of the main characteristics in the Archipelago is that things tend to be bigger, from fauna to flora, everything is bigger: Plants, spiders (yup), snakes, turtles, birds, etc. There’s a bigger bird than the Cóndor Serrano in this zone, and that one is the Albatross, a bird that can have a span of almost 3.80-4 meters from wing to wing, at least 40 cm bigger than a Cóndor. Turtles can also be quite heavy, as you won’t find your usual garden friends, because the isle features turtles over 1.90 meters in size and 200 kilograms in weight. If you love big animals, this is your place to be for sure.

Giant Humpback Turtle in the shores of Puerto San Carlos

Now, let’s get into history for this outpost of Huayramarca. Let me clarify that the dynamics of this isle will be covered in the prehistory, but explained more in depth in next episodes, as it will feature how Huayramarca took control of the Archipelago, how the population exchange happened. This episode has to reply for some questions such as: How the Isles were discovered? who were the natives? How they thrived to be a functional society? Did they have relationships with other peoples across the seas? Let’s begin the main core of the video.

The San Carlos Islands, located between Huayramarca and Ko-oren right in the Salamantic and Ocean of Ayes, are a pretty isolated set of isles from both nations. Around 1000 kilometers away from the easternmost Ko-orenite point and 1200 away from Continental Huayramarca (Guayaquil). The first settlement wasn’t able to happen from the Huayramarcan soil due to the stormy nature of water in the gap, but it happened from different places around. There are some speculations that one of the main groups were the forefathers of the Ochre peoples, who had already prospered significantly in their Archipelago, and they needed to found new places to live in (way before the conception of the modern Ochre Islands). The Seafarers, as they are known by historians, spent some time by preparing reliable wooden ships to be able to deal with the unpredictable and crazy weather in the Ocean of Ayes, especially when heading north, as waves tend to be pretty rowdy due to the collision of hot and cold currents of water.

Before the first successful attempt of Seafarers reaching the island, it is believed that in the 7600 before our era, they sent a convoy of three ships, of which two were sunken due to the violent waves, while the other drifted around and ended in what it is believed to be Ko-orenite territory nowadays. The lack of news and responses from those Seafarers made their pairs to build back and stronger, reinforcing the front and back of the ships and making those able to resist the waves in the sea. Their main guide to try to navigate were the stars, they were hoping to find a better place to settle and be able to return back to their home and tell their peers to make the move, that according to what they could describe and decide to do later.

Oil painting of the Seafarers heading to the north in search of the San Carlos Islands. Painted by Gustavo Dañín – Source: Dall-E 2

The unknown point in history here is that the Seafarers were, actually, the first people able to guide themselves in the seas by using the stars as a reference; then for the sake of being the first designers of strongly built ships to navigate around the violent waters of the Ocean of Ayes. After many attempts, which ended with sunken ships and remnants of wood arriving to the coast, signalling that a disgrace had happened in the sea, the Seafarers decided to do one last push for the north; this time, with 8 ships heading in an expedition of around three months until a ship of them signalled that they were stalled in an atoll.

The first experience of the Seafarers discovering something, but in their intended plan to head north and not drift away, forced them to find techniques on which they could rely to survive and meet their daily needs. The first thing they did is trying to search for some palms and a way to cut some wood, as they needed to pick some fish and cook. Another interesting strategy they tried to make sure of not drinking sea water was drinking coconut water and making sure they could plant more of those, so the supply of coconuts could continue steady through time.

As the Seafarers noted that there wasn’t pretty much anything to do, one of them decided to climb a tree and see if there was something else far north. For the surprise of the group, somebody apparently saw “Something black”. Nobody believed, but he convinced the whole group to head north, as he was confident that they would find a volcano there in which a big island could be there. Despite the person who pointed that was sacrificed, by being thrown to the sharks, the impatience of some Seafarers was growing until they finally noticed something green in the horizon, adding a cap of basaltic black colours from a volcanic cone.

As they noticed that land was soon to be reached, some of the Seafarers committed one of the biggest mistakes possible, swimming near the coral reefs of the San Carlos Islands, which are home of some of the most aggressive shark varieties one could ever found; of course, some of them were killed by the sharks while others remained at the boats to reach the new destination. When they reached, the San Carlos Island, the main of the Archipelago, was explored and they replied some of the main techniques they have done before in the atoll, using coconuts, trying to harvest from them and preparing tools to fish and eat from those.

The Seafarers weren’t alone, as they imported chicken and more livestock with them, enough to help them subsist for some time before they could do something important at the place. During the process, they found about the native species of birds, spiders and turtles, which they weren’t able to hunt because of the size of the risk they found from them, specially from the spiders, which they noted were pretty poisonous until some of the animals they brought in started to kill those and balance the amount of it. The Seafarers divided in three groups: the first group returned back to their land to notify about the finding, which caused a significant shift in the society future, as both groups started to link themselves and found more efficient ways to reach both zones, allowing them to share some trade and support themselves when needed.

The second group, perhaps the biggest one, were those settlers in the main isle who helped to create the systems we know of agriculture there, one which works through feeding birds and letting those to spread the seeds of trees or other fruits through the whole isle, in order to have a better and more natural distribution of things in the isle. Agriculturally, the isle was pretty idle until two hundred years later, where somebody in the homeland of the Seafarers noted that the lands were arable, so they produced irrigation systems from the rivers to the zones designed to harvest crops, without the need of manually excavating wells for those to work.

The third group, and pretty much the one that defined the existence of the group were the explorers. Who continued navigating across the east and west of the isles, in an expedition that took the life of many explorers due to the wild waters they decided to embark. After 500 years of attempts, being unable to navigate to the east and not drift back to the Archipelago, one group found land, and that land turned to be an already inhabited land, which already had mixed population.

The Seafarers are one of the most important and active groups of Huayramarca’s prehistoric past, as many of them fought for their future, made sure to find a better land for them for a new beginning and for prosperity. They found that land, but that wasn’t the thing, they were able to transform the conditions of those land plots and made them for their own use, shared with nature, to make sure that the equilibrium would stay there forever, despite they would continue to satisfy their need as usual.

And this is everything for the episode. As we found what happened with the San Carlos Islands, is turn to see how the peoples interacted between themselves after settling. How the first contacts happened, did those help to both sides? Where any disadvantage or big issue during the process of assimilation? We will know it this next week.”

by **Saint Eleanor** » Mon Nov 20, 2023 9:25 pm

OOC: Schedule available... ahead of schedule.

David Key: "If that doesn't count for much, I'm not sure what does"
Chief Football Correspondent Jamie Rodgers challenges Occidental Olympic's main man on his willingness to step up on a bigger stage
Originally published on Monday 29th January 2007

It seems almost impressive that David Key has racked up very, very few yellow cards in his playing career so far. "So few, in fact, I've lost count - including the academy internal games and Huayramarca. I still haven't got as many of those as I have goals, though."

While at Parkside Community School, Key claimed that he "absolutely lived and bled football." He was far from neglecting on his academics, and says he would have been studying geography at the University had he not been such a good player, but found that many of his friends coincided between the two spaces. "The centre mids, Heather Blake and Glenn French - both now with Olympic like I am, thank goodness - they were pretty good friends with me and more jacks-of-all-trades if anything. Shame they're dating each other now. Rachel Brunning, my current soon-to-be-wife, was a substitute fullback who got at least a few minutes in most games in her schooldays but she was also much better at numbers than I was. Joe Carpenter, the goalie, knew his way around the arts subjects and a few of the essay things. Kieran Exley was my mate just because he was the other striker, he wasn't as studious as me. I don't think I had a single close friend outside that golden generation."

Key will long be remembered in the hearts of anyone associated with Parkside CS at the time, or indeed anyone who was then involved in any way with secondary schooling, for his achievements in their 1999 Charles Trump Shield team. "I scored five goals in four games in my one shot at the competition and won the thing, too; if that doesn't count for much, I'm not sure what does. Maybe the three assists. After the fact, I was awarded the Golden Backpack for my efforts and paraded around a lot of schools for my sins. At Trident, for instance, I met this sweet girl called Tina - brown hair, nice octagon glasses - who made a few sarcastic comments about what I did but generally thought I'd done the nation a great service and that I'd be a good piece for the national team one of these days. I think she identified herself as Tina Falconer... actually, I'm not sure if she's getting up to much these days."

Without much ado or surprise, the first match Key puts forward as one of his three biggest professional influences would have to be that Shield final, a close-fought 2-1 win over the Boys' Preparatory. "Everybody knows the Boys' Prep; I'd call them one of the best four or five youth programs in the country. I'm not even going to be biased - Parkside probably aren't as good as them and we've come up with some fucking good ones. We were all preparing for Harry Smith, their big guy up front, to be their differencemaker at the NatLib, but we prepared well enough that we completely blunted him. We weren't too good in attack - I was the main character myself, after all - and there were no goals by the half. I had no say in the decision to attack from the wings in the second half and then get the ball to me, but it worked because by the third go around when Sophie Browning walloped the ball to me, I was just there with nobody surrounding me. Their little striker, Dom Bennet, ended up finding the equaliser and none of us wanted a Deepchester [last-sixteen penalty shootout] rerun so we decided to just throw the dice. In the end, we won in the fucking stupidest manner possible, with me stood twenty yards outside the box and literally winging it to Heather, who should never have made the diving header at all but did."

He then moves on to discuss his first league win, 3-2 away at the Golden Unicorn five games into the 2001 season. "Sêvêr Fâerçâlenh was one of the greatest ever to play this game. I am not joking. I would have been joking back in 2001, when he was doomed to leaving the club he only joined because his old one was crashing down the Brenecian leagues, but not today. I've even come to accept he was a better leftback than Rachel. It was all change there - George Dunbar as boss, Adam Denby out, Bridget Coombe out, fuck knows who else out other than Fetakela Manuta, who I'm impressed still hasn't gotten a new job - but it showed after four games because we hadn't won any of them. I was starting all this time but still hungry for a few chances and it was getting a bit ridiculous at half time when we were only down 2-1 because Dekky [Dekamela weMexala] had outmuscled everyone else at the right moment. Then George said bring Sêvêr on and that proved to be a great idea because he was booming down the flank and I was wondering what was going on. I wasn't wondering when he got the ball to me twice in five minutes and I got in front of the defenders right on time on both occasions; it was heart-racing stuff but enough to make sure we had a good start in the bag, or a better one."

His final match of choice goes down as a 2-2 home draw against Sword and Shield in the 2003 league. "I always knew how to score goals and whatnot, and if I didn't I wouldn't be anywhere near here. So why would I pick a match midway through a good season between two good teams that I'm not sure ultimately had much bearing on anything? Because that was when I really learned what it meant to be an independent player. Dekky was there but, like a couple of the other people I've talked about today, she was pretty much blunted. The wide players... those weren't of much importance until last year or thereabouts, really. So it was up to me to make the bloody difference and what did I do? I studied the movements of the defenders, part of it even a bit ahead of time - I can do my homework after all, Mr Harley - and found out how to evade them in the first place. Did they notice? Eventually, but the damage was done and I still hear people talk about both of those goals to this day."

Surprisingly, or perhaps not so surprisingly, Key has made few friends in his time with the team. "All things being told, I'd like to be on decent-enough terms with the entire squad so I've had a few talks. Kichirō Matsuda's house party has yet to make its way to me yet but the exactly three times we've had a chat, he seemed in tune with the whole scheme and the suddenness of the role. Christine Terrence can be a famously annoying bastard in the chatterbox sense but I feel privileged that she's carving out some time to talk to someone of my relative stature, or maybe it's the other way around. And Tina Falconer. I'm still not sure how much she's gotten up to. Good for a pint, though - better than those two, at least."

Facetious or serious, one thing we can be certain of is that David Key has made his mark on the Eleanorian national team already. He's come up with a goal on his international debut, knows his way around just about any setup you can drop him into and knows exactly what he thinks of his team and teammates. Truly, this is the Eleanorian way of life, or at least one of its manifestations.

by **Polar Islandstates** » Mon Nov 20, 2023 9:26 pm

SOUR CHERRIES
Part viii
An epilogue, marking the end of the beginning of the end
i - ii - iii - iiii - v - vi - vii.a) - vii.b) - vii.c) - vii.d) - vii.e) - vii.f) - vii.g) - viii
Volume Two
** ** ** ** **

Sometime in the near future...

From high above the city, a solitary figure looked down upon the people living their lives below. Wind tousled his hair and sent lank streaks of it teasing across his rugged features. Stronger gusts sent his cloak wafting across him, and he set his face in a grim scowl as he narrowed his eyes against the lights coming up from the busy streets below, if you could call them that. Dusk was falling behind him, and he reasoned his silhouette might soon be visible to those below, should they ever choose to look up at his perch, high on the most gothic-looking features of the tallest building he could find. It bobbed slightly in the wake of a passing speedboat, and he almost lost his footing.

“Look at them all; all living their lives in blissful ignorance,” he said in a gruff tone to nobody in particular, “they don’t know what I’ve done for them.”

He shook his head ruefully and looked longingly into the middle distance.

“This country is getting ready to eat itself,” he continued, “it needed a hero to make a difference.”

He looked around and brought his focus back into the range of tangible objects.

“I guess it fell to me to be that hero. Not the one this country deserves, but the one it needs right now. Or, something like that, anyway.”

Almost noiselessly, and with all the grace of a goose landing behind him on a small projecting neon sign attached to the side of a hotel, a Goose landed behind him almost noiselessly on a small projecting neon side attached to the side of the hotel.

“NOT QUITE A SILENT GUARDIAN THOUGH, ARE YOU, TIMO? MORE’S THE PITY...” thought the Goose in Timo’s head.

“Speak for yourself. What was that supposed to be? I’ve seen fish land with more elegance than that.”

“YES, WELL. IF YOU FELT LIKE PROVIDING ME WITH A NET I’M SURE I’D MANAGE IT TOO.”

“What are you doing here, anyway?”

“CHECKING UP ON YOU.”

“Oh ye of little faith. I’ve been very busy, actually,” sniffed Timo indignantly, turning to face the Goose for the first time since it landed.

“OH REALLY? DOING WHAT EXACTLY, SEWING?” replied the Goose, looking Timo up and down scathingly.

“You know, all these years on this planet and I don’t think I’ve ever been judged quite so harshly by something so ridiculous as a Goose in a little golden crown.”

“YOU KNOW, IF WE SO CHOOSE WE CAN MAKE SURE YOU SPEND ETERNITY IN THE CLOTHES YOU’RE REAPED IN,” continued the Goose, “WE USUALLY MAKE EXCEPTIONS FOR THOSE WHO DIE IN EMBARRASSING CIRCUMSTANCES: THERE WAS THAT FANCY DRESS PARTY ON THE YACHT THAT SUNK A COUPLE OF YEARS AGO, FOR EXAMPLE, POOR SOULS. OR ‘ZIPLOCK ZANDER’, BUT I’D GLADLY MAKE SURE YOU LOOKED LIKE THIS FOREVER...”

“Sorry, ‘Ziplock Zander’?”

“YES, DON’T YOU REMEMBER? ZANDER HARLEM, THAT KARBIJNIAN POLITICIAN. GOT CAUGHT WITH HIS PANTS DOWN, AND THEN HAD A HEART ATTACK SHORTLY AFTER ZIPPING HIS PANTS BACK UP AGAIN - A LITTLE ‘TOO’ QUICKLY, IF YOU CATCH MY DRIFT.”

“Oh. Grim.”

“YES,” winced the Goose, if that was something Geese did, “WE DID TAKE PITY ON HIM SOMEWHAT. ONCE WE’D STOPPED LAUGHING LONG ENOUGH, ANYWAY.”

“What’s your point, Goose?” orated Timo, grandiosely.

“MY MY, AMAZING WHAT A CAPE WILL DO FOR SOMEONE’S SENSE OF SELF IMPORTA... SORRY, I FORGOT WHO I WAS TALK TO FOR A SECOND.”

“Still catching a lot of sass from someone who just transplants their thoughts directly into my brain,” whinged Timo, breaking his high character posture to gesticulate something rude at the Goose.

“WELL, I HAVE TO HAVE ‘SOME’ PERKS,” retorted the Goose, returning fire with an even ruder hand signal that Timo didn’t know Geese knew. Or that could be achieved with wings. “MY POINT IS, HOWEVER, THAT YOUR TIME IS UP. AND I DON’T PARTICULARLY CARE WHAT KIND OF DISCOUNT SUPERHERO YOU THINK YOU’RE DRESSED UP AS, YOU’RE COMING WITH ME, SUNSHINE.”

“I’m sorry.”

“YOU WILL BE.”

“No, I mean, I rather think I won’t be,” continued Timo, “you gave me a task, remember?”

“OF COURSE I REMEMBER,” blinked the Goose, “I SEE ALL.”

“Well then, you should have seen me fulfilling that task,” said Timo, with as much smugness as he could muster. Which, if you’ve met Timo Skye, you’ll know is not so much a case of summoning as it is breathing.

“I HAVE NOT,” replied the Goose, “WHAT I SAW WAS YOU, SWANNING AROUND THE MULTIVERSE, HAVING A LOVELY TIME, AND GATHERING PRECISELY NOBODY TO THE BEACON’S SIDE WHATSOEVER.”

“Were you not a fan of my swanning around?”

The Goose said nothing, but gestured to its current form by way of response.

“Oh, right.”

“SO, IF YOU WOULD; THE AFTERLIFE, PLEASE.”

“Again, I don’t think so.”

The Goose did the mute equivalent of opening its beak to think more words directly into Timo’s brain, but the erstwhile footballer intercepted.

“Where are we, right now?”

“RIGHT NOW? ON TOP OF THE GRAND HOVE.” Blinked the Goose, lifting a foot up to double-check the writing on the neon sign beneath it.

“And what’s down there?” asked Timo, jabbing a leather gloved finger in the direction of a building opposite them.

The Goose looked in the direction of the finger. “A GRUBBY LOOKING ESTABLISHMENT CALLED THE ‘OCEAN CAFÉ’, WHY?”

“And what do you suppose is going to happen in the ‘Ocean Café’ in about fifteen minutes?”

The Goose looked Timo up and down again, with his ridiculous hand-cut mask accentuating his already severe cheekbones, slightly offsetting the effect his fraying cloak was having, waving in the breeze.

“IS IT A FANCY DRESS PARTY? BECAUSE YOU’RE A LITTLE OLD TO BE HAVING YET ANOTHER MID-LIFE CRISIS TIMO...”

“No no,” smiled Timo, “in fifteen minutes, your precious ‘Beacon’ is going to walk into that café, and is going to meet each of the influential figures you asked me to collect and bring to him.”

“BUT, YOU NEVER ACTUALLY-“

“All will be revealed, my friend, all will be revealed,” interrupted Timo, attempting a precarious bow given his position on the parapet of the Grand. "That happened to be more than simply 'swanning around'."

“RIGHT, AND I’M JUST SUPPOSED TO TRUST YOU, AM I?” asked the Goose.

“Yes,” smiled Timo, “I’m afraid so.”

The Goose looked from Timo to the Ocean, and then back to Timo. It sighed, which again wasn’t something Timo knew Geese knew how to do.

“OKAY, BUT I’M WARNING YOU; THIS BETTER NOT BE SOME SORT OF ELABORATE FILIBUSTER,” said the Goose, as sternly as a Goose in a little crown could manage. “AND LOSE THE BLOODY GET-UP. I DON’T KNOW WHAT URBAN METROPOLIS YOU THINK YOU’RE LOOKING BLEAKLY OVER, OR WHICH OF THE THREE OR FOUR FILMS THAT IMMEDIATELY SPRING TO MIND YOU’RE ATTEMPTING TO IMITATE THE MOST, BUT THIS IS BJARNAREY, NOT BASTION: YOU LOOK MORE LIKE A BIT OF OLD SAIL CAUGHT IN A TELEVISION AERIAL THAN A SUPERHERO...”

“I can’t,” sighed Timo.

“WHY NOT?”

“...I actually am caught on a television aerial. Could you help me out?”

“OH, WELL IN THAT CASE: ABSOLUTELY NOT.”

“Oh come on, be a sport.”

“NO WAY,” laughed the Goose, “I HAD TO CONCEDE THE POINT WITH ‘ZIPLOCK ZANDER’, THERE’S NO WAY I’M PASSING ON THE OPPORTUNITY TO GET ‘TIMO SKY DISH’, TOO...”

** ** ** ** **
Volume Two
i - ii - iii - iiii - v - vi - vii.a) - vii.b) - vii.c) - vii.d) - vii.e) - vii.f) - vii.g) - viii

by **Brannfjord** » Mon Nov 20, 2023 9:54 pm

GRIMNES DAGBLADET
Not Unbeaten Anymore, But Still in Qualifying Contention

Well, let’s be sincere and say that nobody, absolutely nobody expected Brannfjord performing at the level the team is doing so far in the World Cup Qualifier. De Selene are doing a solid qualifier so far, we all know it’s only five matches in out of fourteen, but the team has shown some spending performance through the hand of Kjartan Martinssen.

The manager, chosen after the excellent performance of Senja in the Første Divisjon, has demonstrated that Brannfjord has some interesting material to work with, no matter the position, the team is able to work as a block and the substitutes are able to get on par with the starters. Ørjan Eidsness and Gjermund Landsverk are some of the most surprising players so far, considering that both started being substitutes, but now they have consolidated themselves as starting players; the pair who plays in Tikariot have learned a bit from their international experience, performing at a different level from the rest of the team when given a chance, but also supporting the teammates to do better and better if possible, by providing recommendations to their style of play and how to manage tempers when needed.

The precision of Martin Nordstrøm, Emil Helsing and Sigurd Haugen has been essential for the team, as the trio of strikers have been efficient so far when it comes to capitalising the few opportunities that the Brannfjording can find in the pitch at certain times. The team, that is focused to be offensive, has had to adapt to the different circumstances in the matches, some requiring the team to play more carefully in order to avoid receiving a significant number of goals in a game and ruining the goal differential; instead, the spotlight has gone to transitions and clinical definition from the strikers when having a chance.

Øystein Sæther has turned to be the pivot that the team needed, but didn’t show himself during the Baptism of Fire. His evolution has been in part due to the recommendations of Eidsness and Landsverk on how to work better in the midfield, how to control the ball and have a special vision to hold and pass at any given time. Sæther has now found himself in the control of the match tempo, being able to coordinate his movements, thoughts and ideas with the rest of the team, now having a more cohesive play identity rather than some disorganised sparks of creativity as it happened during the Baptism of Fire.

Brannfjord is at a precious moment so far, and that comes even despite the 3-1 defeat against TJUN-ia in the road, but keeping Blekebakken undefeated so far. The biggest challenge of the qualifier so far, and in the short history of De Selene comes in the shape of Zwangzug, a World Cup-winning nation that wants to widen the gap between first and second place to secure a play-off spot, and Brannfjord wants the extreme opposite, as the team doesn’t wants to fell out of grace and wants to engage in direct fight with Zwangzug for a qualification berth, which may look far but not impossible for this team of young and compromised players with the cause of Brannfjord.

Kjartan Martinussen says “Let’s go fucking wild and fight, I don’t care who we have in front, we will fight for our dreams and try to achieve those. We might be a little team, still in the works, but we will make sure to punch over our weight.” In what it seems to be a bit provocative statement from a representative of a nation that tends to be proud on being calm and boring sometimes. The players have also echoed Martinussen, but in softer words, more on the line of “We have dreams, and we want to make those dreams a reality.” Or “Zwangzug is a tough opponent that will show us what we have to learn and if we are going in the right direction.”

There are multiple interpretations, but the fans are still keeping in eye the fact that Brannfjord has been performing good as of late, and they hope that the form will continue so far, even if it will be challenged by the heavyweights.

by **Independent Athletes from Quebec** » Mon Nov 20, 2023 10:11 pm

Ahead By A Century

PART 4 - Playing With the Boys

The waters here, dear ready, were known to be blistering on contact and cold and wet when nearing them. The waters here were the kind that was hard to navigate, and the winds ever-changing even when on the eastern, lesser-affected part of the Tantramar Bay that separated Acadie province's western and eastern halves, that even the windbreakers and the beanies did little in protecting the sailors' head and torso. It was half past three in the afternoon, and the waters just immediately outside of the Bay were deserted. The skies here have been overcast for most of the past month or so, a rare departure from the usual reputation of rain and grey the central hinterlands of Acadie would be known for, even as the wind went back and forth in motion.

Adelaide Marie was doing her best to control herself in middle of sails, trying her best to coordinate herself back to the harbour in the struggle. Being a kitesurfer, following the precedent made by her mother Christine the Second who was a three-time Olympian on windsurfing, had a penchant to go on more self-reliant, difficult of disciplines in sailing, and it was clear she, even after having spent over a decade in the sport, still had much to learn.

The sophomore had been in the marina for most days when she was in the school for the fall term, playing squash with the junior varsity team for the winter term before returning to the marina for the spring. While she had spent most of her sporting time at this place, around fifteen minutes away from the Avon-Gillespie campus, Adelaide felt no particular rush or even thought to a sailing career just yet. She had already participated in her first Olympics, where she was able to visit the Terranean coast for a ten-day period before flying home just in time for the closing ceremony. A week in Wick Castle would follow, after which her and her brother Alexandre managed to travel back home on, ah yes, the Red Seaplane. Nothing like that for The Latest Whistledown headline.

But she knew time was on her side - in six years, she would be twenty-two, still very early into a sailing career, and if paced well, could sail into her thirties and possibly up to four, even five, Summer Olympics. But the talk about purposefully holding back the next phases of her life, especially in the name of having an eternal career, was something that did not exactly ring well in Adelaide's mind. There is much more than to a living a single life, she would famously say to her classmates, who would often receive it as a matter of Adelaide, whose acute judgment and preparedness had reflected that of her mother and a decency from her father, being picky over things in life. They, more often than not, would miss that it's a Everything has multiple sides, and duties apply in all not just one of them.

One person who understood it too clearly was, of course, Christine the Second. The news of her visit to see her daughter as an unscheduled part of her royal visit to nearby towns, had reached Adelaide about two hours prior and Adelaide, who by then was well in the water, knew the Queen had little time to waste. Upon reaching the pier she got out, carefully anchored her kiteboard, and then watched Christine approach from a distance away with a black suit and a sailor's hat. Her mother had looked very much the same as her twenties, but over time Addy couldn't help but to notice the weight of time that had started to affect her mind and thus expressions.

'Maman,' said Adelaide, as she gave a quick curtesy back to Christine. 'You have come at right time.'

'I am always at right time, Addy,' answered Christine, smiling at how wet Addy's wetsuit and vest were. Christine's been there and done that, when she was still a novice sailor at the Yaletown School in Prince Eric, but in those days it would have been her grandmother, the late Queen Mother Nathalie, instead of her ever-busy mother, Queen Elisabeth (originally Elizaveta) and then sickly father Jacques IX. 'Now, when will you learn to wear a helmet like what papa and I have told you?'

'When I become like you, maybe just one day,' Adelaide smiled after giving a light laugh, to which Christine responded with a look of approval. 'I'm sure there are matters more dire that you want to see me for, wouldn't you?'

'No, sweetie,' Christine smiled, looking around. 'I just wanted to check and see how you, and if possible, Alex are doing out here. There is about an hour and half to spare here, so I have felt that it would be the right time to see how you two would be faring. Especially with the Whistledown continuing to whistle...'

'Nothing's out of ordinary with the school this year?' Christine asked in a sweeping manner of questioning, as they started to drive their way back to the Avon-Gillespie campus from the Marina. 'The senior last year, as you would know, certainly took advantage of the situation, broke a couple of stools and got into appropriate trouble close to the HSCs, the A-Levels and the Bac.'

Right, thought Adelaide as she was reminded about the incident. Said incident, one where about a twenty senior students had 'raided' the Avon town in a drunken stupor after their examinations, certainly did not leave a particularly positive connotation about the school and while most her cohort would return into the following school year, much greater scrutiny had followed in public for a month or so. 'No, subjects are fine. You would expect the usual drama, but you know it too well, also having come through the public schools and whatnot.'

'Sometimes, no news is better, and this also applies to you and Alexandre,' Christine answered, before pointing out what everybody had known. 'Nobody could disguise your brother from appearing at the QIS cross country championships at the UPLI, or anywhere he could be seen out in the stands, however.'

'That's Alex, you know he's a man of his own. He could spend one night on a women's lodge, and the other night in town off somebody's bed, but at least he got to witness a 15.25, a national record,' Adelaide's tone could imply that the siblings, while close in personal level, had some fundamental levels. 'They compare grandpa and granny all the time, without recognising that they both had, you know, those similarities too...'

'I'm not going to deny that your grandparents were nowhere near the saints, but let's not think about that for now,' interrupted Christine. The topic of her late father was still a sensitive one for her, even as she had well adjusted into that phase of parenthood where she was now the perpetrator instead of the receiver. 'I see that you are not wearing the Queen Nat's ring with you.' She then switched the topic and asked.

It was at that moment that Adelaide had misplaced her ring. It was neither at her room, nor her bag, but it was definitely not back in Joongyeong. She knew she had to lie about it. 'Of course not, the ring's at the safe in my room, and even I have forgotten the password for the safe,' lied Adelaide, hoping that her mother would know. 'It's the sapphire ring right?'

'Yes, it's the one that my grandfather, that being Henri the eighth, had given to the Queen Nathalie. A rare sapphire from Tombouctou and whatnot. She wanted you to have it.'

'Yes, now I clearly remember,' Adelaide answered, before putting on a letterman jacket. 'You know, that-'

It was then that the two were disrupted by the loudness of the Jeep coming from the opposite side, where the radio was blasting out a country hit from approximately five years ago. Both Adelaide and Christine, who was behind the wheel, as well as a couple of security cars some distance behind the speeding 1950s convertible she had on her disposal for the trip, turned around to look. They could notice that all the windows of the Jeep, which realistically should have been seating only five, open with no less than eight, school-aged passengers just older than Adelaide, singing:

Let me hear you say, truck yeah
I wanna get it jacked up, yeah
Let's crank it on up, yeah
With a little bit of luck I can find me a girl with a truck, yeah
We can love it on up, yeah
'Til the sun comes up, yeah
And if you think this life I love is a little too country
Truck yeah

'What the fuck,' was what Christine said, as the Jeep inched closer. It would drive past her quickly, with the passengers shouting a bizarre combination of celebration calls 'Hail the Future Admiral Jang! Hail the Prime Minister Lucien! God Save the Queen! Long Live the Queen!' in the manners of drunken prppy teenagers would behave on their trip to a town bar. Adelaide did not look their way, perhaps out of awareness and embarrassment over it all, but the Queen took looks at the teenagers - three of whom were halfway out of their car, one above the sunroof and two of them drinking in the trunk.

For a time she wore an unidentifiable expression she would give whenever she had to appear in official presence, but once the Jeep had disappeared into the horizon, she looked to the right to see Adelaide, whose face had turned red out of embarrassment. 'Your brother added Jang Joon-Gweon into whatever that chant was, didn't he?' Christine asked, remembering that Jang Joon-Gweon, the nation's finest red-ball star (Wanda Hosaka was a finer, more explosive batter at white-ball and Adeline Barnes was an all-arounder in every aspect of cricket) who was engaged to Bronco Moran's daughter Hannah, was someone he dearly looked up to. 'Funny because Jang's fiancee has been Kweon Binnington staffer for some time now.'

'Who else would it be?' Adelaide answered. 'And yes, that's the Prince of Abitibi we are talking about. Him going around in that manner, like great-aunt Caitlyn once was, like that grandmaman would appreciate that so much.'

'Now, now, let's not talk that way about Alex,' Christine stopped Adelaide, before they would start to slow down. An intersection near the longer, country road into the school was around two hundred metres away. She knew it was the right time to turn around. 'How's the new girl you've been talking about? Lundrigan, is she?'

'Ah, her,' answered Adelaide, feeling an additional nerve strike right at that moment. 'She seems worried, but not exactly about here, to to speak. Amazing at horn, and alright in hockey. People say she's very much like her father's tongue and mother's voice, and I could see why now.'

'That's a nice thing anybody could say, you know how fondly I think of Sir. Asher, her father,' Christine smiled back in satisfaction. 'To be called that is the dearest compliment any man or woman would give to someone.' She then asked again. 'Does she talk much of her family home?'

'Not really, but she talks about her brother who's in a wheelchair and a little sister sometimes,' Adelaide answered. Of course, she did not exactly know that had hit her nerves.

'Poor thing. The young one nearly killed that woman,' she said. Adelaide turned around to look at her mother, perhaps in surprise in which her wording about Claire's mother, Eileen de Ramaut (Plongeon), had changed so abruptly, but by then Christine had returned to give as little facial expression as possible.

Another month would pass between now, with the scholarly matters combined by the current affairs, those that were communicated via international and domestic media outlets, and latest gossips that would be communicated by a bit murkier fronts such as, yes, The Latest Whistledown (formerly known as Gossip Boy in twenty years ago under original co-owners). The extracurriculars would carry on as usual, the Sixth Forms busy with their respective choice of university examinations, and the weekends would see taxis or chauffeurs lined up for the Upper House (or older members of Upperclassmen) to go for a weeknd getaway.

That aside, for most part the life had gone along fine for our dramatis personae however, with Claire would find more liberty in field hockey practices and private lessons in the town proper, Adelaide trying to spend more time in the libraries when not working for the Marina, and Alexandre's pathway looking clearer than ever as a future Naval Aviator Corps pilot, and those were some of the liberties that those affluent and privileged could afford that many on the outside world did not have.

Even for a school like Avon-Gillespie, however, there were some traditions that the students followed with religious devotion, and that was homecoming. The world of public schools (in old-world, not conventional terms - those would be state schools, dear reader) highly valued the return of the alumni, who often had heavy pockets and lived to the world of either their country estates or the skyscrapers somewhere out there in the metropolises. Most did not exactly have the festive vibes of the bigger homecomings held by the state schools, whose marching bands numbered hundreds and games would be played in expensive school district stadiums, but they had more intimate? nepotistic charm that was their own appeal.

Avon-Gillespie was of no exception. Being a school of around eight hundred but in six grades, Avon-Gillespie did not have the raucous atmosphere, but look deeper and you could find some of the names to be of intrigue. Whether it be a recent cabinet minister Mylene Graham, a famous NSCF and now-RFL quarterback Benoit 'Benolution' Youngblood, or runner Brianne Mitchell-Oleksiak, or a few lords and ladies and businessmen whose presence would bore you out after they were neutralised by the urban, corporate life, there would be crowd who would forget about the Big City Lights and spend the weekend at their old high school, perhaps to reminisce their days in the rolling hills of Avon County.

As with almost every Homecoming the king of the weekend were the so-called Homecoming games. A full weekend or if compressed, a weekday (what's wrong with these urbanites? and on daytime? well yes, this was indeed the case in my old high school where the spirit was great but the public board said f-u to nighttime events in general -e.d.-), would be used to schedule a slate of home regular season and/or playoff matches. Sometimes it would involve the selection of homecoming kings and queens in a pseudo-popularity contest involving the seniors, a precursor to the eventual 'crowning' at the Maytime Prom later in the year. This was not something that the AGS had really done relative to their in-state equivalents, but the significance remained in the forms of playoff rounds.

It was in early November, one week before the Remembrance Day. The Avon County by this point had gone freezing and foggy, with sight lines on the road barely seeable and the ravine looking more like the mouth of a volcano than an actual ravine. This was the sight that about a couple of thousand visitors to the Avon-Gillspie Campus had reacquainted themselves, their numbers not enough to fully fill the international-regulation multi-purposer, but the atmosphere had made it up for it. Usually their homecoming games were not scheduled, and this was of no exception, but the availability of livestreams and VousTube had already made lives easier for everybody anyway.

The crowd did seem particularly loud this year, however, as the Avon-Gillespie would come to face Kennebecasis Collegiate School on the second round of rugby playoffs. It was the even-numbered year, meaning that they would be having rugby union for primetime homecoming game at five in the evening, while odd years were for gridiron football. Led by a certain lock in Alexandre, who played a reliable role expected of his fix-feet-nine frame that also attracted tacklers (who wouldn't want to tackle a future king?), the Gophers started off strong scoring three tries in first fifteen minutes, and never really trailing for the match. The final score was 56-10, their first win in four years against the Kites, but the star of the game was not Alexandre, who knew his role as the lock and the decoy in the scrum, but Leonor Valdes, who had scored four tries to mark a school record in the rivalry match.

The roar of the crowd was loud and tangible, even more so as the Gophers would clinch a spot to the regional finals, and the claps were felt like that of the birds' wings flapping. Even as the team would go to their dressing rooms, and walk out, their minds were still on the cloud nine. Alexandre unsurprisingly was one of them, him having noticed a sizeable contingent from her father, Caspian of Cassadaigua. He was accompanied by Heo Seung-Geon, the son of hall of fame third baseman for Kingston and Concord Heights Myeong-Shin, his father and grandparents.

'Well done, Alex, you held on so that Valdes could fly,' said the Duke of Halifax, as he hugged his son. 'Well done, now drop your stuff in your room and let's head into the dinner hall.'

'Thanks papa,' said Alexandre, as he smiled back and thanked his dad, perhaps feeling a slight sense of joy in hearing a compliment so delightful as this, before he headed back to the Annesley House.

Annesley, unlike most other houses, were situated on the bottom of the ravine, with the original intent being that this made available for the original class of students, who would eventually fight in the Southern Rushmori War just half-decade later, would be able to head directly into rowing exercises. Alexandre wasn't exactly a rower, him preferring to fly rather than to swim or row, but he still appreciated the vantage point to the steep ravine that would surround him, and after four years (with a term away in the other side of Portal), he had made himself a home there.

Alright, tonight's going to be good seeing the Geoffrey Geon again, thought Alexandre, as he got out of the three-floored brick building. He was back in his suit jacket, with prefect and rugby captain badges and a purple scarf added, and was ready to go.

For a brief second, however, he saw a light. It was a tiny, focused concentration of light that had come from the trees that grew along the rocky walls of the ravine. Huh, thought he, as he turned around before continuing to walk the other way.

Not that it helped him anyway, however, as the light would flicker once, then twice, before hitting Alexandre in the back. Alexandre, losing control of his body, fell sideways.

by **Saint Eleanor** » Mon Nov 20, 2023 10:15 pm

OOC: Yak Empire 1-1 Saint Eleanor match report will come with the Carla Hawkins interview, which I hope to publish a few hours after scores go up.

Channel 4 presents THE RACE TO THE WORLD CUP - World Cup 95, fourth qualifier game
SAINT ELEANOR 3-0 BARUNIA (Steve Pilchard 12 and 67, Kichirō Matsuda 49)

Report by Candy Hewitt, Channel 4 football analyst: Saint Eleanor finally returned to the top two of Group 14 as they comprehensively dispatched Barunia at the National Liberation Arena, led by Steve Pilchard at arguably his best...
...
This match report will be finished after the cutoff.
...
It always bears repeating that the qualifiers are as short as they are, and with that the reality that even two tricky games can turn out to be a tough spell. This victory, at home against the bottom seeds though it may have come, will be much welcomed. It is, however, only the start of an arduous journey that will take up the entire summer, finish with the White Stars visiting Barunia yet still having three matches left in which to complete whatever job they are fated with. They will only have to hope that their job is to get into the World Cup, rather than merely contend for contention itself.

⨷ ⨷ ⨷ ⨷ ⨷ ⨶ ⨷

Tina Falconer: "I was as much a scout as I was a player"
Chief Football Correspondent Jamie Rodgers rushes out his interview with a perma-substitute before the clock strikes 10:30pm in the SESB office
Originally published on Tuesday 26th June 2007

On normal occasions, Tina Falconer is nice, bubbly, willing to talk about her experiences. She's all of those things when she sits down for her interview, too. "Yes, but this is a serious occasion and I will treat it with the dignity it deserves - identikit answers to identikit questions. I'd get more entertainment out of the fucking Reporter."

In her days at the Trident Community School, Falconer was thought of as "very much a Renaissance woman; I'm not sure if I can use that term in this setting but my headteacher and the Major's press secretary both used it so I assume I'm safe. I was friends with just about everyone who bumped into me in my year group; I got Bs in almost everything, which is what was expected of me and what I expected myself; I was even the Head Girl, although the student council liked breaking down from time to time so I had to force through the agenda myself. It helps that I had a consistent uniform: tied-up hair, tied-up tie, neat trousers, neat shoes... Head Girl badge, Student Council badge, Eco Team badge, Drama Society badge, Coder Club badge, Valladar flag pin from my days I had to represent them in the Dockside Schools' mock Common Rushmori Community... thankfully, the Vilitan Cove authority never handed out badges. And the glasses. I was an almost addictive reader, although I've largely cut back now."

It was therefore no surprise to see her captain Trident's 1999 Charles Trump Shield team. "It's not very well-known that I had to ride the bike to the first leg, at New Bayside's field, because the bus left without me; I needed a bit of a rest but thankfully got back in time to show them that... we were quite good, actually. Bishopgate, one of the town sides, had to visit us in the following round and we completely eviscerated them eight goals to two; I suspect this match is where I started being a more aggressive, forwards defender. Newbanks in the last sixteen were a completely different kettle of fish - they also had the generous support of a League side - and while I can't say I couldn't prevent the defeat, I can say I didn't make any glaringly obvious mistakes that could have had lost us the match. Looking at you, Phil. We even made the Vilitan Cove Invitational by virtue of our 8-2 being the biggest Shield win, back when that was a respectable tournament, although we did get hammered in both legs to the eventual runners-up." Will she comment on her meeting with David Key? "My overriding memory of that day was somebody telling me I had a dry sense of humour. I'd like to thank whoever that person was, although he was much older than David."

Asked - as always - to select the three matches she thinks had the greatest bearing on her playing career so far, she starts with a 2-1 defeat at home against Athletic Saint Eleanor five years ago. "That team won the league by thirteen points and they didn't even have Bridget Coombe. Lauren Pell was actually one of the weaker links in that team - I keep talking about people for the sole reason that Mary Kirkport, the legend that she is, keeps drilling man-marking into us - not because she wouldn't float inside, although I secretly appreciated that, but because she was slow on the ball and a touch slower off it, so no need for the slide-tackle here. I was confused about half an hour in when I saw that I wasn't getting anywhere near the ball any more, but it turns out I'd found a gap and Wasso [Wasemprela Sareleva] was much trickier. I dealt with him, mostly, and stopped him from doing too much other than a dodgy assist - but that was when I figured that yes, I was as much a scout as I was a player."

She then discusses her first derby win, a 1-0 win at home against Grand Beach in 2004. "I am honestly impressed that it took me until my eighth attempt to win one of those; maybe Julia Atherton was as cracked-up as we all thought and she did end up leaving the club in short order too. My victim was... ughhh, I had multiple victims. How, for starters, was I supposed to mark Tim Brandon? Very, very, very simple - get inside first; then you'll be able to rob him off the ball, or force a deflection which he can't quite cross as well. In a sense, I didn't really need to look after the strikers as much as I thought I'd have to because they were distracted enough to let the centrebacks take care of them. What this means is that I lied, I only had one victim and that is the second piece of the puzzle - do your job correctly and absolutely everything else will fit into place for everyone else. I won't take credit for the win, but..."

Her final selection comes in more contested circumstances, as her club went up to Juventud in 2005 and struggled to a 1-1 draw. "Juventud got points five times last year and I'm sorry to say that was one of them. Patrick Trout isn't a name you think of at all when it comes to Juventud success stories - he's two years younger than me and now cleans the floors at one of the private pubs, not one of the nice NLF Clubs like my mum co-ordinnates the admin business for. Quite the irrelevant sentence, I get it. Anyway, Patrick made my life hell that day: he shoulder-barged me when he got the chance, repeatedly tried to run me off the ball, badmouthed me sometimes and pretty much stopped me from doing anything near my job without even having the confidence to do his own. I ended up lashing out a few minutes into the second half and both of us got sent off, which was honestly the least worst outcome."

Asked for comment on who her favourite teammates are, Terrence leaves us in no doubt: "I'm not in the team to make friends, but if I had to, I know much more about David than I did when I arrived and I've tried to talk to all the regular starters. Even Cathy [Winchester], although I shan't usurp her nor complain that the freaking vice-captain is better than me." Straightforwards, uncompromising, and maybe a touch assertive in all other aspects of her life? You bet.

by **PotatoFarmers** » Mon Nov 20, 2023 10:19 pm

Delaclava 0–0 Poafmersia
Goalscorers: None
Lineup (4-3-3): Nicole Potts; Kilikina Lee, Cindy Oriol, Liadan Holmström, Xenophon Robson; Michael Jackson, Sylvia Fusco, Aapeli Shea (c); Tessa Bjarnesen, Dagur Lawrence, Leontiy Seet
Substitutes: Jackson Handris (Seet 72'); Erle Sartini (Jackson 72'); Emma Henderson (Robson 84')

Poafmersia 0–0 Astograth
Goalscorers: None
Lineup (4-3-3): Nicole Potts; Kilikina Lee, Cindy Oriol, Liadan Holmström, Emma Henderson; Michael Jackson, Sylvia Fusco, Aapeli Shea (c); Tessa Bjarnesen, Dagur Lawrence, Leontiy Seet
Substitutes: Sakari Cantù (Seet 60')

One win, two draws, two losses. Given the difficulty of the group, and the state of the squad, it might seem very acceptable to Lu Jialan. At least, according to his words at the Press Conference.

"I think these aren't as bad as the opening loss to Cabo Azure. These are acceptable draws considering that the opponent is also capable. To be real honest, I would accept a close defeat against Cabo, but the manner of that loss was just...disappointing..."

There was little words to be mentioned to the press, because on paper nobody understands the difficulties the team is facing. Most outsider would just look at the results and rant at the team for not performing up to their "so-called" standards. But within the team, they know the cracks have been showing. The domestic league isn't as good as it used to be. The performance of the team in the IFCF competitions have been slipping behind the national standards, and the teams have been trying to find that wave of newcomers that would help to renew the teams. Instead, most are relying on average players that aren't even capable to step up to the national team, and others have to look overseas for a better outcome. The only thing keeping the team going by now is the morale - and at least these draws won't dent the morale. They can be considered as "unlucky" to have lost. They could have done "much worse". But looking for better results? Its really the analysis of the opponent players, and the pre-match hard work that is now carrying this team going forward.

by **Chromatika** » Mon Nov 20, 2023 10:19 pm

World Cup 95 Matchday 6/7

Where are you in the standings at the halfway point? Are you atop, or looking up, or are prospects for you looking hopeless? Cutoff.

Reminder: Sylestone will score the next half of cutoffs. The start of his cutoff window for the next cutoff is here.

by **Deltt** » Mon Nov 20, 2023 11:07 pm

Sargossa 2-1 Delte
Reçeucian AI text generator 'DeepReçn' ^{OOC: it wasn't} in the far faraway for the Toddwardine Beastmarket Journal & News of the World

I've been briefed not to dwell overly long on the finer details of our match but suffice it to say the Away Team Mission played a generic game and mostly earned some interesting adjectives for their performance, particularly within the homogenous ninety minutes of very normal time.

At the same time, or maybe a few minutes before...

Delte 1-0 The Grearish Union
Sports Correspondent Kim Samrodd at Ildemorton Road for the Oswark Parish Advertiser

I won't dwell overly long on the finer details of this match, and it goes without saying that Enor Perro was our best player yet again, and definitely goes without saying that I'm on holiday and using a Reçeucian AI text generator for my match report ^{OOC: I'm not} but certainly mention should be made of the PA system announcer, for whom the Deltic FA are expected to make an apology later.

I hear the away team played a blinder, although this may be a fabrication.

The Quick & The Delts: Faraway Sauce
2/6: The Strength of Ringer Smith

As noted by Doc Ustingham

“Before that,” continued Ringer Smith, bench pressing a startled chequer-skin zebra foal with consumate ease and referring to when he fell through a fluid time hole, was rescued by Untto Squaker and brought to the Fountain of Youth Spa Resort in the Garga Marshes, “I was sitting on my porch having a doze. Did I tell you already I was 157 and a half? Things had gone entirely tits up after the Foxchester Accords and I just wanted to retire, so I bought this Quiet Cottage On The Edge Of The Cosmos with a fishing pool down alongside the porch, reeled out my line, and was waiting for a bite. Only natural I’d fall asleep, with all that peace and quiet.”

Subject PS65-x, or Ringer Smith to give him his lab nickname, was of course describing his backstory for the lucidity test at the end of his stay at the Resort. It is one of several tests we have conducted on the effects of the revitalising bogwaters up in the gnat-bitten highlands. Not to mention, of course, the application of my famous and very delicious Faraway Sauce.

The strength of Ringer Smith, though. For a centenarian and a half, he’s more ripped than my hundred-fifty year old poster of Simeone di Bradini in his heyday; more ripped than Hercules, or a James Brown sample, or a school-leaver’s blazer on the last day of summer term; he’s more ripped than Callum Banda’s hastily disposed-of puppet register notebook at the bottom of a wheelie bin left out for the garbage collectors on a cold and frosty Monday morning before the World Cup police come a-raiding for evidence.

(Although I did say I wouldn’t mention my RecQ Helicase Booster syrup, which I’m branding as Faraway Sauce, I should probably point out my delicious anti-oxidising age-restoration condiment is flavoured with a combination of sun-soaked tropical tomatoes, piquant Deltic mustard, thoroughbred Sicoutinaise garlic bulbs and of course Henderson’s Yorkshire Relish, acquired from collapsing an interdimensional wall between Oswark-upon-Delte and a magical mystery city in the clouds called Sheffield. Perfect on chips.)

by **Gnejs** » Mon Nov 20, 2023 11:52 pm

Killer Bob’s WCQ34 Match reports
MD1. Quakmybush - Gnejs: 1-0

I’m struck by primarily two things while watching this old recording.

One, those old school Dandelion kits - with the light green and yellow stripes - are fucking awesome. But I think they’re only cool in some sort of retrospect. When I look at them now, from my perspective today, they look cool, but when I look at them in context, on the tape, back then, they look utterly ridiculous. Pretty much like all things from back in the days. I guess it’s just some sort of misdirected sense of nostalgia. Those miniature shorts and puffy cotton-wool blend shirts with semi-long sleeves that cover the elbows; that’s objectively ugly and they all look so stupid jogging around on that field. At the same time, I’d love to have that kit today, and I would look upon it as a thing of beauty. The Dandelions going back to that kit, now that is an idea. I wonder how that would work. Retro-cool? Or just laughable? They’d probably “update” it, using the same color scheme but applying it to today’s soulless polymer standard, which would no doubt be the very worst solution.

Two, the opposing side. What the fuck kind of name is that? Here you are, under the impression that you’re living in a society, a community, a commonwealth of nations. And then some rouge land pops up, sounding like they’re exclusively populated by actors from university variety shows. Maybe I’m not one to speak, because Rock knows I’ve encountered a lot of befuddled foreigners complaining about the nonsensicality of the name «Gnejs». But hey, at least it’s a metamorphic rock, the bush thing is just bad taste.

The game itself was a stale affair. Two teams trying to not fuck up first. The only goal came about after a late corner. The video quality is poor, but it might’ve been an own goal.

How Baggieland got a Rock of Friendship

Part one: The great root vegetable famine

The Union in the mid 1800’s was probably what you’d expect: a somewhat poor and economically underdeveloped island caught between an obsession for rigid propriety and an age old naturism with deep shamanistic tendencies. Not that dissimilar from today then, you might say, and you’d not be completely wrong; the economy fairs a bit better, people are less poor, technological progress has brought its share of updates, and there are not as many top hats and long sideburns. Other than that, much is remarkably similar.

Always an isolated corner, The Union had very little official contact with the world Not-of-Rock these days, apart from a very short list of Friends; nations that at some point in history had done a service to The Union of such magnitude that they were rewarded a Rock of Friendship and the bond of eternal gratitude and Friendship that follows with it.

But there were always travelers landing on Union soil every now and then. Boats looking for trade, adventurers of both good and bad intentions, explorers of the sea, or people fleeing from some thing or another hoping to find peace and solace at a rock on the road to nowhere. They were all welcomed and greeted in accordance with the principles of courteous non-alignment, naturally. At the same time every one of them was viewed with a profound suspicion - foreigners coming here being foreign with their foreign ways and foreign goods - and every effort was made for their stays to be as short as possible. Should they intend to remain, swift and complete assimilation was the expectation, both socially and from the authorities.

A rock sustains itself, as the saying goes, and what the rock offers should be enough for a people to survive and prosper. What if something utterly alien found its way to The Union via one of those dirty boats? A secret agent, ready to wreak havoc on the rock’s ecosystem? It could prove catastrophic, important men and women in embroidered shirts and polished top hats would often say. Indeed, this was very much the prevailing narrative in the discourse surrounding what has since been dubbed «The Great Root Vegetable Famine» that plagued The Union in the 1830’s, where an hitherto unknown fungus-like microorganism infected crops and caused mass root vegetable decay (of course, Union scientists later found conclusive evidence that the fungus actually originated from deep within in The Interior, likely in times of yore, and had since been dormant; the prevailing theory is that a homesteader must’ve released some ancient fungus spores when they tried to dislocate a large boulder).

It was around the year 1834 when the first signs of trouble started appearing. Dark blotches on leaf tips and plant stems came first, and then white mold was found under the leaves. Whole plants quickly collapsed and infected potatoes, carrots, onions, artichokes - you name it - started showing grey or dark patches and their insides swiftly decayed to foul-smelling mush. Root vegetables were a staple Union food and a crucial dietary part for every man, woman and child, and within a year The Union suddenly found itself in dire trouble. When the epidemic character of the situation was abundantly clear, and likewise the futility of all attempts at staggering the plague sweeping every part of The Rock, it was concluded that the solution had to be found “off-rock”.

The Unionist government decided that a group of emissaries would be sent out into the unknown to seek a cure or remedy for the plague, so that The Union could dare dream of a new spring. Why not ask one of the few Friends they had, one might ask? Well, one of the Customs of Friendship state that One does not burden a Friend needlessly, and it was therefore deemed imprudent to bother them (this particular Custom has since been reinterpreted, and The Great Root Vegetable Famine was in hindsight categorized as a situation that did constitute a proper need).

by **Stevencousin** » Tue Nov 21, 2023 2:40 am

STEVENCOUSIN TOURISM AUTHORITY

The difference is felt in a modern town steeped in history: Fixmouth

If you're looking for a short but memorable trip to Fixmouth, Stevencousin, here are some activities you can do in two days and one night. Fixmouth is a town with a long and rich history, dating back to pre-Roman times. It is also the religious center of Stevencousin, with many churches and monuments reflecting its spiritual heritage. This article is in conjunction with the match Stevencousin v. Beefsteak City for the World Cup Qual. 95 which will take place here.

On your first day, you can start by visiting St. Smallmoor, Fixmouth's oldest cathedral and a symbol of the town's importance in the country's early days. You can admire Gothic architecture, ornate chapels, and tombs of historical figures. You can also visit the nearby Treasure Museum, where you can see sacred art and relics.

Next, you can head to Rockborn Square, Fixmouth's main square, a lively place where locals and tourists mingle. You can enjoy a coffee or a snack at one of the many cafes and restaurants located on the square, such as Sandpeak Cafe and Midguard Gastro. You can also explore the surrounding streets and plazas such as Glimmerpeak Mall, where you can find shops, parks, and many more chapels.

For lunch, you can try some local specialties, such as salmon with baked potatoes and tomatoes, banana porridge, or mutton chunks cooked in a clay pot, head to the Lightburgh Arena to enjoy all the food under one roof. You can also try some regional wines and cheeses there.

In the afternoon, you can take the Mass Transit Link or E-taxi to Flamebarrow Memorial Garden, Fixmouth's most impressive monument. This is a pilgrimage church located on a hill and reached by a stunning Baroque staircase that represents the ascent to heaven. You can climb the stairs or take the funicular, which is the oldest in Stevencousin. At the top, you can visit Stonewind Church, enjoy the view, and relax in the garden.

For dinner, you can choose from a variety of options, from traditional Stevenian cuisine to international dishes. You can also experience Fixmouth's nightlife, which is lively and varied. You can find bars, pubs, clubs, and live music venues that cater to different tastes and moods, Houndhelm Center is one of the destinations for your night out.

On your second day, you can visit some of the other attractions that Fixmouth has to offer. You can visit Windpass Keep, a 17th-century castle that houses a decorative arts museum and has beautiful gardens. You can also visit the Pearlwood Orchid Garden, a romantic place with colorful flowers and fountains.

Fixmouth is a town that combines history, culture, and fun. It is a great destination for a short but memorable trip.

Stevencousin 2–3 Beefsteak City
Readymann Ground, Fixmouth [24,437]

DEFENSIVE SIDE
Pascal DeNapoli [GK]
Chathura Vimalaharan [DEF.]
Raymond Aas [DEF.]
Armando Correia [DEF.]
Guilherme Fabian [DEF.]

OFFENSIVE SIDE
Carlos Whitfield [MID.]
Gregory Gigliotti [MID.]
Thanuka Jayamanna [MID.]
Steinar Norvoll [MID.]
Gerard Kallstrom [FWD.]
Sumith Wanigassoriya [FWD.]

SUB'S.
Renato Miguel Boa-Morte [DEF.]
Alon Bernstein [DEF.]
Josef Snajdr [MID.]
Válter Folha [MID.]
Benjamin Spevar [FWD.]

ASSIST
Steinar Norvoll [MID.]
Sumith Wanigassoriya [FWD.]

GOAL
Gerard Kallstrom - 10th minute
Thanuka Jayamanna - 88th minute

Mertagne 1–1 Stevencousin
Brandistock Football Campus, Brandistock

DEFENSIVE SIDE
Ramiro Fernandes [GK]
Chathura Vimalaharan [DEF.]
Mads Dahl [DEF.]
Alon Bernstein [DEF.]
Benjamin Hadjadj [DEF.]

OFFENSIVE SIDE
Carlos Whitfield [MID.]
Gregory Gigliotti [MID.]
Válter Folha [MID.]
Steinar Norvoll [MID.]
Steven Cheyrou [FWD.]
Gerard Kallstrom [FWD.]

SUB'S.
Steven van Oudenhove [DEF.]
Andre Saifi [MID.]
Simon Armas [MID.]
Thanuka Jayamanna [MID.]
Gürkan Lichtsteinerr [FWD.]

ASSIST
Válter Folha [MID.]

GOAL
Simon Armas 52nd minute

by **Jeruselem** » Tue Nov 21, 2023 4:50 am

Princess Stella and Rennala Lunar in StrayaRoos, after Jeruselem lost to the hosts 6-3 in the 7th round of qualification games.

Stella: Yes well, that didn't go to plan did it?
Rennala: No, that was not in the plan.
Stella: StrayaRoos did win 6-5 against Bigpipstan the game before
Rennala: Well I guess they played the same way today except they were at home
Stella: The loss to Valanora was depressing enough but that was an expected loss anyway
Rennala: That game was nothing like this one, Valanora didn't throw the kitchen sink at us like StrayaRoos did.

Stella: I guess you'll need a new strategy when we played them again in round 14
Rennala: We obviously cannot not have a repeat of today
Stella: We don't want a repeat of Valanora game either but that one was tolerable I guess
Rennala: Nevermind ...
Stella: Let's see we've lost two game in row, zero points and conceded 8 goals. Scoring only 3 goals
Rennala: That just fucked our goal difference from +8 to +3.

Stella: Weird thing, we still have the 2nd best defense ...
Rennala: We'll need to score a few extra goals to make for this one
Stella: StrayaRoos have scored 23 goals and conceded 17 in 7 games. That's more than 3 goals per game scored while conceding more than 2 per game.
Rennala: Only Britonisea have conceded more goals, 21.
Stella: StrayaRoos score more goals in this game than Britonisea have scored in 7 games as well.
Rennala: I'll have work out how to deal with Valanora and StrayaRoos when round 13 and 14 come around again ... anyway, how were the other games.

Stella: Bigpipstan beat Britonisea in Britonisea 1-0, Archalit at home drew with Glazgo 1-1 and Valanora held at home beat Natanians and Nosts 2-1.
Rennala: They sound like normal games. Yes, normal games don't have nine goals or 11 goals.
Stella: Like Bears Armed beating Macbon 7–3?
Rennala: That today?
Stella: Yes, I guess we weren't alone in getting smashed
Rennala: I guess there's always someone worse than you

Stella: There's a been a few 7 something thrashings
Rennala: We nearly joined that club
Stella: Let's just forget about this, we just had a really bad day.
Rennala: I guess these things happen to every team
Stella: Our friends at the Mann Network will so pleased we fucked up today
Rennala: Oh yes, them. They celebrate our failures for sure.

Stella: I fully expect a few headlines in the papers tomorrow
Rennala: That's OK, they say nothing when you're winning but lose anything ... different thing
Stella: Not to worry, the girls at Naked News Jeruselem aren't like that. We love our team to be winning even if it is like 1-0 ...
Rennala: Let's go home, I guess I have plot my revenge against the roos when they come around.
Stella: Well they are now 2nd on the table and we're 3rd
Rennala: I wonder how Valanora will view them now?

by **Indusse** » Tue Nov 21, 2023 9:12 am

Hind Tribune
DownTown to come back stronger

By Subrato Shahla

The terrorist attack at the DownTown Central shopping complex has brought a lot of attention to the city as well as the parent group, DownTown Entertainment. With the end of the primary investigation in the spot of incident and the police forces returning the property rights to its owners, the Downtown Entertainment, they've published a press release on what the future of the property would be. The company has stated the construction of a bigger shopping mall in the place and a complete outline has been given. The name of the property is said to remain Downtown Central.

Arsheen Bhallar, the owner of DownTown Entertainment stated in the press release that, "Rising from the ashes of adversity, this mall not only symbolizes resilience but promises to redefine the city's shopping and leisure experience." He added to the statement that, "The architectural marvel, situated near Marina Beach, blends modern aesthetics with technological innovation, offering fellow citizens an unparalleled and futuristic shopping escapade."

The Press Release clearly states the change that is said to change the way people used to shop in the city and moreover the country. The Mall is said to emerge as a beacon of modernity with a curated collection of fashion boutiques, flagship stores, and exclusive outlets, offering a journey into the latest trends of the world. The mall is said to embrace cutting-edge technology, from smart mirrors to seamless contactless payment options, promising a shopping experience that seamlessly blends style with convenience.

DownTown Entertainment ended up releasing a advertisement like brochure for the upcoming DownTown Central Mall. The details have been outlined and a more brief idea is said to be released to the public when they are done creating their official mall website in the web address: http://www.downtownmarina.dte.com

FOR PUBLIC RELEASE | DownTown Entertainment

• Introducing The DownTown Central Mall - Your Next Ultimate Destination! •

After overcoming challenges, DownTown Entertainment proudly presents The Grand Horizon Mall, a magnificent 5-acre haven in the heart of Marina Beach, New Hind City!

Unparalleled Shopping Experience:
Explore an array of trendy fashion boutiques, leading brands, and exclusive outlets, bringing you the latest in style and entertainment.

Smart Options at Your Fingertips:
Indulge in a seamless shopping spree with state-of-the-art technology, digital directories, and contactless payment options for a modern and hassle-free experience.

Culinary Bliss:
Savor the flavors of the world at our diverse range of restaurants, food courts, and cafes. From gourmet delights to local favorites, The DownTown Central Mall is a culinary paradise for every foodie.

Entertainment Extravaganza:
Immerse yourself in cutting-edge cinemas, gaming zones, and live performances that promise an entertainment spectacle like never before. Introducing the best cinematic experience in DownTown's own screens with the modern UHID (Ultra High Image Definition) technology.

Serene Green Heaven:
Escape the ordinary at our lush green spaces and relaxation zones in the terrace of the mall, offering a tranquil retreat for you to unwind and rejuvenate. Located next to the food area, it also has open space for open air events and concerts.

Tech Hub and Innovation Playground:
Embark on a journey of discovery at our tech hub, "The DE-T Universe" featuring the latest gadgets and interactive experiences, celebrating innovation and creativity. The DE-T Universe also facilitates the top technological brands all over the world.

Family-Friendly Fun:
Enjoy quality family time with dedicated children's play areas located just below the top floor, ensuring a delightful experience for the little ones.

Cultural Marvels:
Immerse yourself in art and culture with our galleries and exhibition spaces, showcasing local talent and contributing to the cultural heartbeat of New Hind City. This Cultural space is set up in a tabletop platform across the parking spaces.

Wellness Wonderland:
Prioritize your well-being with fitness centers, yoga studios, and wellness facilities, promoting a healthy lifestyle within our vibrant community.

A Safer Tomorrow:
Rest assured with our top-notch security features, making The DownTown Central Mall a secure and welcoming environment for all.

Join Us in Celebrating Life at The Grand Horizon Mall - Where Dreams Soar High and Moments Flourish!

World Cup 95 Stats

Indusse 2 - 2 The Holy Empire
Mersiàs 37'
Rahul 71'
--------
Indusse 3 - 3 Santa-Barbara
Rahul B Kumar 17'
Mersiàs 33''
Portman 77'
Rahul 81'
Portman 86'
Hagi 90+1'

Group 13 First Half - Indusse Fixtures
MD1 : Indusse 2 - 1 Vilwandia
MD2 : Ethane 0 - 0 Indusse
MD3 : Indusse 2 - 0 Damukuni
MD4 : Sharktail 1 - 1 Indusse
MD5 : Indusse 4 - 3 Banija
MD6 : The Holy Empire 2 - 2 Indusse
MD7 : Indusse 3 - 3 Santa-Barbara

by **Baggieland** » Tue Nov 21, 2023 10:40 am

The Mark

King Alsqueak: "Dundee, I'm bored."

Dundee Talke: "Perhaps Your Most Gracious Majesty would like to be entertained by our new jester?"

King Alsqueak: "That chap from Gnejs – the one with a fondness for our sheep? Yes, his first joke was an absolute corker, I couldn't stop laughing all day. Bring him here now!"

Oddstein Øye: "Your Majesty, which dinosaur knows the most words?"

King Alsqueak: "Fascinating, I love these kinds of riddles! Now let's see, a tyrannosaurus knows 'grrrr' and 'roar'. That's two words. Whereas a triceratops only goes 'chomp' because it's a vegetarian. Jester, I have the answer… 'tis a tyrannosaurus!"

Dundee Talke: "Your Royal Highness, you solved that conundrum in record time! Tell us jester, does the king's insight have any flaws?"

Oddstein Øye: "Umm… well, actually… it's a thesaurus."

King Alsqueak: "I've never heard of such a dinosaur before!"

Dundee Talke: "Me neither. I fear this Gnejsian blighter is making it up as he goes along."

Oddstein Øye: "Your Majesty, it's a book… of synonyms."

King Alsqueak: "A book of what?"

Dundee Talke: "Cinnamon, Your Highness. It's a very popular flavouring, I'm sure dinosaurs would have liked it too."

King Alsqueak: "In that case, synonym buns for everyone!"

Dundee Talke: "I'm afraid Your Majesty, that's not possible; the royal coffers are dry."

King Alsqueak: "Well, that's not good. What should we do to replenish the treasury?"

Dundee Talke: "May I suggest Madame Xianggu?"

King Alsqueak: "That hussy of the high seas! It took me years to get rid of her, now you want to unleash her again?"

Dundee Talke: "Yes, My Lord, but in our favour!"

King Alsqueak: "How do you mean?"

Dundee Talke: "We give her licence to attack foreign ships, then we share the booty between Madame Xianggu, her crew and the royal treasury. If any foreign government blames us, we just show them the surrender negotiation from four years ago and deny any knowledge, it's a win-win! I already took the liberty of preparing this letter of marque, you just need to sign it Your Highness."

The Three-Legged Pirate Bar, West of the Goose Coast

Madame Xianggu: "YAAR! How I be missing this life! It be great to be back on the high seas, robbing everyone we be seeing!"

Crew: "YAAR!"

Just then, a stranger walked into the bar. He wore a tight-fitting, purple, double-breasted jacket and an overly-high, purple top-hat. His long bushy sideburns colliding with his even bushier handlebar moustache. He then forcibly banged his diamond-tipped walking cane into the ground several times. Everyone in the bar stopped what they were doing as they gazed upon the newcomer.

Fandango Molineux: "Salutations wretched filth. I bring an offer of riches to anyone who can remedy the root vegetable plague, one that is currently afflicting the great nation of Gnejs. But please do not sully our shores with your presence, just tell me the cure."

Crew: "He be saying 'riches' C'ptain."

Madame Xianggu: "YAAR, and those riches will soon be ours!"

Madame Xianggu approached the oddly dressed stranger and cleared her throat.

Madame Xianggu: "Good day to thee, fine sir. I may be of assistance to your dilemma."

Fandango Molineux: "And what would a common girl like you know of the root vegetable plague?"

Madame Xianggu: "Good sir, in Baggieland our scientists are at the forefront of root vegetable plague prevention. Why, even the king himself takes an active role in the research and he personally asked me to go forth and find nations that could benefit from our knowledge."

by **Semarland** » Tue Nov 21, 2023 10:40 am

sportsat.SEM

REVIEW: FIRST HALF OF WORLD CUP 95 QUALIFICATION COMES TO A CLOSE WITH DEFEAT, CAN SEMARLAND MAKE IT THROUGH?
by Roque Haywards-Heath

For unranked nations, the prospect of World Cup qualification is near enough a pipe dream. Yet some could be forgiven for mistaking Cortell Carrasco's optimism as delusional when he led his side to victory over Polar Islandstates in the opening match of World Cup qualification. Chevone Clarke's delightfully whipped free kick left Hans Aigner rooted to the spot, and a defensive masterclass from veteran Shone Andrews and the ever dependable Gael Larsen shut out the likes of Dmitry Eisenhauer with ease. Yet, for those outsiders who haven't really observed much football out of Semarland, Polar Islandstates are a country who found themselves in the same boat as Semarland, at least as KPB Rankings go. Also classed as unranked, despite the abundance of talent in the Rushmori nations, for political reasons they have also not been able to compete on the multiversal stage for years, a much longer absence than Semarland. Regardless, the test was a very strong one, and Carrasco himself may have been a little shocked to come away with three points. Needless to say, that opening victory set pulses racing. It wasn't completely unknown for unranked teams to make it to the playoff rounds, with direct qualification of course much harder to achieve.

Basel-Triesen were next up, and with the opponents opening the scoring through Elias Stöger 25 minutes in, it seemed to have stunned Cortell Carrasco's side a little. Latching onto a wonderful through ball by Lars Canazlar, Stöger played a neat one-two with Sebastian Kujrakovic before firing home. Unchanged outfield, with just Gaetano Jorgensen the only change in goal in place of Russell Boakye-Yiadom, it took a while for Smearland to settle in despite being on home turf. Loick Sorensen managed an equaliser minutes after the restart, tapping home after good work from D'Jean Hamilton down the left hand side. Hamilton did well to evade Max Kupfer and Jakob Kobierski before cutting inside and neatly playing it into the path of Sorensen, who made no mistake putting it past Ralph Münzenfodder. An away trip to Darmen didn't yield much success either with a 4-2 loss, but a double from Loick Sorensen was certainly a positive plus strong individual performances from Jamal Barker in midfield and Kyrone Paris down the right.

Back to the Natunolstadion, Sarzonia were the second visitors in qualification and a tight game was expected. Carlos dos Santos came close for the visitors with a testing free kick that had Matthias Baxter scrambling to push it over the crossbar, whilst Jake Campos felt like his header from the resulting corner should have gone in, but Baxter was determined to display why he should be Semarland's #1 despite his age with another acrobatic save. Semarland would take the lead before the half hour mark, with Stephen Boakye-Gyan, in for Gael Larsen, playing out from the back before finding Kyrone Paris down the right hand side, who floated a wonderful cross in for Gennaro Christie to turn and volley home past Carlton Sandt. That would be the sole goal of the game, despite Christie and Paris as well as substitute Johan Larsen all having clear cut chances. Carrasco would have surely felt they were wasteful in front of goal that day, but the three points mattered more.

An away trip to Kandorith wasn't much to write home about. Despite the game yielding a respectable attacking performances - goals from D'Jean Hamilton, Gennaro Christie and substitute Bismark Boateng would surely have been celebrated any other day, the defensive performance was to put it simply, woeful. Pascal Melbourne and Kortney Delaware looked off the pace - understandable in fairness, given they both played a full 90 for their respective clubs four days earlier and have yet to start in this qualification cycle so far. Delaware was hooked at half time with a suspected calf injury, and the usually reliable Gael Larsen struggled to make much more of an impact as Semarland conceded another three in the second half, with the only positive from a 6-3 loss was Carrasco's side halving the deficit thanks to said goals from Hamilton, Christie and Boateng. Xanneria put up a similar attacking display in the next game, a 5-2 victory for them. To his credit, Carrasco could have blamed jetlag, travel times, climate differences, any non-footballing reason he wished but was quite blunt in his press conferences. Whether that would be more motivational than detrimental, who knows.

For the home game against Farfadillis, the "finale" so to speak of the first half of qualification, Carrasco elected to hand starts to several uncapped players/new faces. Casper Winter, Edgar Kangwa, Akim Hanley and Johannes Round all made their full debuts, while there were starts for Olympics heroes such as Rahim Nallo, Stephen Boakye-Gyan and Nahom Teklemariam. Despite the 3-1 loss, it was a strong performance. Given Farfadillis are one of the strongest teams in the multiverse, and arguably the strongest opponent Semarland will face in qualifying, it could have gone a lot worse. Kangwa and Hanley impressed going forward from full-back, Round looked assured in midfield and Winter pulled off some good saves when needed. Teklemariam was withdrawn just after the hour but looked impressive down the left, and whilst D'Jean Hamilton is possibly the best winger Semarland have produced in years, Teklemariam is certainly a good enough backup. There could be worse options.

So, seven games down, seven to go. Semarland lie in fifth place (out of eight teams), not bad for an unranked side halfway through qualifying. Qualification is a long shot, and probably unprobable, but we're still here to enjoy the ride. Maybe next time, or the time after that, or the time after that one - there's still plenty of years to go before we can ever get back into the upper echelons. Remember, when Semarland did qualify for the World Cup all those years, despite making a few on the bounce they'd always almost crash out of the group stages anyway. So we've got that stage to pass too.

But back to the team, now we've seen everyone at least once, let's have a quick review of how they've got on.

Starting in goal, the most impressive has to be Matthias Baxter. The clean sheet against Sarzonia will be his personal highlight, a man of the match performance from the veteran FC Nuholm custodian, and whilst the Darmen game was a bit on the forgettable side (four goals conceded is never a good thing, surely), Baxter definitely reduced the opponents' scoring output with some remarkable saves. It's likely he'll choose to retire from international duty after the tournament, and deep down he'll feel cheated that he never got to represent Semarland internationally in his prime years. But he's certainly given a good account of himself when called upon, and surely a coaching role beckons at the end of his playing career. Likely successor Russell Boakye-Yiadom kept a clean sheet against Polar Islandstates which is no small feat, but had a poor performance against Kandorith as he shipped six goals. Gaetano Jorgensen has always been impressive at club level but hasn't set the world alight internationally, but didn't do a bad job against Basel-Triesen, and Casper Winter has just had the one game to put his name out there. It'd be close between the latter two for the third choice shirt should Semarland defeat the odds and actually qualify, but we'd probably lean toward Jorgensen for his greater international experience.

Left back has been a position that's never really been locked down since Semarland resumed international competition. Andre Driscoll-Glennon was and still is the original #3, the sole FC Kolberg representative always a threat going forward. His usual deputy Ecuador Sorensen has been hit and miss - he was one of the stars of the Olympics campaign but has struggled in WCQs this cycle. The Kandorith game was terrible for the entire defence, in all realness, and whilst it would be unfair to single anyone out, Sorensen definitely endured a torrid time at the hands of Taichi Saito. Edgar Kangwa, who recently was snapped up by Eikborg Club after his team of the season performance last season with Sporting Matrolvik, looked impressive in his substitute cameos against Polar Islandstates and Xanneria, but really impressed against Farfadillis, despite the scoreline. Kangwa is certainly more of a wing-back than a full-back, so should Cortell Carrasco ever choose to employ five at the back, Kangwa will definitely be suited to that LWB role, and we hope we get the chance to see him in action there for his country.

Moving to the opposite flank, Karl Kvist is possibly going to go down as Semarland's greatest right-back. In the "golden days", it was always Eirik Malsen. Nathaniel Oseni never got the chance to replicate his former club teammate's success on an international level despite certainly doing so for Molsbik Arkjet, and the likes of Valentin Modise and Sheko Amazone got their international careers cut short by the SFA's incompetence. Kvist however, looks immense despite his short stature, and with Krsthaven having a bit of a slow start to the season, we could see Kvist pursuing his career abroad. The right-back position seems firmly his going forward, though Tyrique Ritchie and Akim Hanley seem capable deputies, though like Kangwa on the left, are much more suited to the wing-back position. Kvist offers more defensive security than any of the full backs on either side, a credible enough going forward and a very good set piece (whichever you want), which going forward makes him the natural option - but if you want raw pace and more of an attacking threat, Ritchie or Hanley would be your man.

In the centre, we've had a bit of a mixed bag. Veteran captain Shone Andrews, like goalkeeper Baxter will deep down be frustrated he never had chance to shine during his peak, and will likely call it a day internationally after the cycle comes to an end. Andrews has impressed despite his age however and has shown he's still got it, and has been a valuable asset to to the team off the pitch as much as on it. Krsthaven's Gael Larsen started strongly but his form dipped towards the end, and Pascal Melbourne and Kortney Delaware will both hope for more game time to prove they can replicate their club talent on the international stage. Possibly overtaking the duo is Rahim Nallo and Stephen Boakye-Gyan, who have had less time to shine than Melbourne and Delaware but certainly appeared more impressive. Both play out from the back with ease whilst maintaning a strong defensive sense, and Boakye-Gyan's involvement in Gennaro Christie's goal against Sarzonia and Rahim Nallo's late header against Farfadillis mark the only real goal involvements from centre-backs in qualifying. Melbourne and Delaware have long been tipped for success and definitely have the potential to do so, but they'll have their work cut out now with Boakye-Gyan and Nallo hot on their heels.

Looking at midfield now, and it's possibly the weakest overall area for Semarland. Jamal Barker is the exception, with the Krsthaven captain up there with the best players in the squad - top 3 at least. Barker has impressed in every game he's played internationally, with SportSAT statistics recording his lowest rated performance for Semarland as "6.6". The real struggle is finding him a long term midfield partner. Rameses Kristoffersen has suffered with injury struggles for a few years now and based on talent alone, should technically be Barker's midfield partner. Byron Mandanda has come on leaps and bounds in the last few years and really impressed during the Olympics, but has struggled to replicate that so far during qualifying and everyone will hope that's just a purple patch. The likes of Johan Chevron, Lyrone Eastwood and John Omrore are all completely different central midfielders who have all certainly been very impressive at club level, but are also struggling to adjust to the international stage. Chevron and Barker have nailed down their midfield partnership at Krsthaven but look off the pace internationally, but Eastwood and Omrore are seen as "too similar" to Barker's overall style of play. Eastwood didn't look bad against Xanneria in place of Barker, whilst Omrore wasn't that bad against Farfadillis either, but we're yet to see either play alongside him and at present are seen more as backups. Johannes Round is a new face in midfield and looked comfortable and assured, but faces strong competition from Kristoffersen (when fit) and Mandanda for the #6 role.

Attacking midfield is seen as seperate to the almost combined role of central midfield (with #6s and #8s falling into that category given there are several who can interchange between both roles). Of the central midfielders, Chevron is closest to a traditional #10 and the likes of Barker could surely do a job there. Chevone Clarke has shown why he's the main man in qualifying though, restricting Hakim Masters and Mikkel Matthias to just a solitary start each. Clarke's free-kick against Polar Islandstates has been the best goal scored by Semarland so far, and his performances through the middle (and even out wide when he came on against Farfadillis) have been nothing short of at least a 7/10, as per SportSAT ratings. Clarke is a different level of playmaker, and whilst Masters always comes close domestically, the Eikborg Club attacking midfielder has struggled to get a look in so far during qualifying. Masters has impressed in his cameos nevertheless, though Matthias has struggled to make much of an impact despite impressing during the Olympics and being one of the standout players for Fransborg set Njilkaer last season as they defied the odds to finish in 6th place.

On the left wing, or perhaps left attacking midfield, D'Jean Hamilton is another member of what could be considered a future golden generation. Hamilton is perhaps the most naturally gifted on the team in terms of technical ability, and will always impress more under a strong manager who can get the best out of him mentally as well as on the pitch. Hamilton has calmed down a bit after gaining a reputation as a bit of a wild card and has thankfully toned it down in more important games (with the FC Jansberg winger being no stranger to a red card now and again a couple of years ago for on-the-pitch altercations). Hamilton has done well to keep out a player such as Nahom Teklemariam, who would probably easily find himself in the starting lineup if it wasn't for Hamilton. Teklemariam is still young, but was probably Semarland's best player in the Olympics and has done really well so far in qualifying. Quite tall for a winger, he still manages to retain such a low centre of gravity and the ball appears glued to his feet, and whilst he might not be able to replicate some of the audacious skills that Hamilton pulls off, he's got the potential to do so. It seems that left wing is a position Semarland will be secure in for years to come.

On the right hand side, Kyrone Paris can fit the similar hybrid mould of winger/wide playmaker that Hamilton does so effectively on the opposite flank. Paris has been one of the best players for Sporting Saint Adrensburg over the last few years and after a bit of a slow start to his international career, he's really picked up recently. He will compete with Chris Simmonds for a berth on the right hand side, and the duo have been fighting for a place in the team of the season domestically for the last few years. They've had the likes of Lasse Jensen to compete with, who did impress during the Olympics and will have felt unlucky not to be called up for World Cup qualifiers, but Simmonds offers more of a goal threat and can also play further advanced in a front three if needs must. Paris is the more technical of the two, thought not as much of a showboater like Hammond, whilst Simmonds has shades of more of a direct, old school winger at times, but is at his best when more direct and cutting in and pulling it back into the path of his striker. All four wingers in the squad offer unique playing styles that's for sure, and it's testament to their quality that the likes of Razak Nartey, Glenn Baah and Lasse Jensen can't get a look in, although this is the first time Carrasco has named more than two wingers in the squad (though Baah was included as a third winger in the Olympics team, given his proficiency on both the left and right hand side).

Up front, Loick Sorensen is still seen as the main man, despite Gennaro Christie looking strong as well. The two have always competed against each other, each starting for one of Semarland's biggest clubs and rivalling each other for the golden boot in the Premarligaen for almost ten years now. It's been a case of steel sharpens steel, the duo have certainly improved themselves over the years for having such a strong rival, and it's a manager's dream to have two very clinical strikers to choose from. Sorensen has netted three in three, Christie two in two - and despite Semarland only playing a total of 35 international matches so far since their return, both have very appealing goalscoring records internationally. Johan Larsen hasn't been afforded much chance to impress, neither has Bismark Boateng, though again, much like the attacking midfield position that's just testament to the high performances of Sorensen and Christie rather than a negative against Larsen or Boateng's ability. Both have managed a goal apiece also and have been used from the bench more than they've started, but again it's not a bad return. Larsen is more of a target man if anything and usually impresses more with a strike partner, whilst Boateng, described as "raw and explosive" by club manager Kwame Cole, offers a similar physical threat but is much stronger with his feet than his head. Boateng can power through defences with ease, and with Larsen getting on a bit in terms of age, Boateng will have his eyes on being striker #3 - though with the likes of Ramello Marshall and Kyren Yeboah hot on his heels in the scoring charts, he'll have to step up the gears just a touch more.

In total, the players have done quite well. Of course, results could always be better, but those wins against Polar Islandstates and Sarzonia will give them a boost for the second half of qualifying. Whilst qualification isn't out of the window, it's still a tough ask, but if one thing is for certain, Semarland are improving - gradually. They've looked much better and more cohesive since CAFA 7, and whilst they need to work on certain defensive aspects, it's just a case of smoothing things over. Even if qualification isn't secured, Cortell Carrasco will certainly be happy if they can keep improving and putting themselves in a better position for the next attempt.

POLAR ISLANDSTATES 0-1 SEMARLAND
Clarke '37
Boakye-Yiadom; Driscoll-Glennon (Kangwa 76), Andrews (c), G Larsen, Kvist (Hanley 76); Barker, Kristoffersen (Round 60); Hamilton, Clarke (Matthias 82), Paris (Simmonds 60); L Sorensen.

SEMARLAND 1-1 BASEL-TRIESEN
L Sorensen '51
Jorgensen; Driscoll-Glennon (E Sorensen 85), Andrews (c), G Larsen (Nallo 63), Kvist; Barker (Omrore 60), Kristoffersen (Eastwood 60); Hamilton, Masters (Chevron 60), Paris; L Sorensen.

DARMEN 4-2 SEMARLAND
L Sorensen '42, '63
Baxter; Driscoll-Glennon, Andrews (c), G Larsen (Delaware 74), Kvist (Ritchie 74); Barker, Kristoffersen (Mandanda HT); Hamilton (Teklemariam 68), Clarke (Masters 84), Paris; L Sorensen.

SEMARLAND 1-0 SARZONIA
Christie '27
Baxter; E Sorensen, Andrews (c), Boakye-Gyan (Delaware 62), Kvist; Barker, Mandanda (Chevron 57); Hamilton (Teklemariam 57), Clarke, Paris (Simmonds 57); Christie (J Larsen 70).

KANDORITH 6-3 SEMARLAND
Hamilton '29, Christie '41, Boateng '84
Boakye-Yiadom; E Sorensen, Melbourne, Delaware (G Larsen HT), Ritchie; Chevron (Omrore 75), Mandanda (Kristoffersen 80); Hamilton, Clarke (Matthias HT), Paris (c); Christie (Boateng 75).

XANNERIA 5-2 SEMARLAND
J Larsen '5, Simmonds '57
Jorgensen; E Sorensen (Kangwa 70), Melbourne (Nallo 70), Delaware, Ritchie (Hanley 70); Kristoffersen (c) (Round 87), Eastwood (Mandanda 75); Teklemariam, Clarke, Simmonds; J Larsen.

SEMARLAND 1-3 FARFADILLIS
Nallo '76
Winter; Kangwa, Nallo (Melbourne 83), Boakye-Gyan (c), Hanley; Round, Omrore (Eastwood 58); Teklemariam (Clarke 63), Matthias (Masters 63), Simmonds; Boateng (J Larsen 58).

by **Milchama** » Tue Nov 21, 2023 11:45 am

Alexandria Times-Tribune-Sun-Moon-Sky-Picayune-Courier-Post-Pre-Forward-Current-Reader

Sports Section

Lamerein Survives After Late Comeback against Tzvi

In one of the friendliest games of international football you will ever see the Milchama Warriors defeated the Tzvi Doves 3-2 with 2 second half goals from Avi Benbemore doing enough to overcome a 2-1 halftime deficit for Milchama.

Of course the intrigue from this game was not just felt in the field but in the stands and in the narratives as well. Many sources had said that unless embattled Milchamian head coach Daryl Lamerein had a 6 point international window he would be fired before the second half of World Cup qualifying. Lamerein's interesting tactics of fielding two national teams, a Home Team, that only plays on the road, and a Road Team, that only plays at home, had rankled many people who think that continuity is a good thing for soccer teams. This risky business got worse when the Warriors got out to a tepid start to their qualifying campaign, only winning 2 of the first 5 qualifying games.

The Road Team did their part with a beautiful 4-0 win over United Hawkland where after 3 first half goals from 3 different players meant that the game was effectively over by halftime and made it possible for Lamerein to continue his job beyond this international window. So that led to the game against Tzvi and whether Milchama could do enough to beat the Doves to help their flagging campaign hopes and help their manager keep their job.

As it was a game on the road, the Home Team was starting for the Warriors. Of course before the game Milchama was in a unique position in Tzvi, one of the other few openly majority Jewish nations in the World Cup. Many Milchamian players have talked about being heroes to the Jewish minorities in many countries where bigotry against religious minorities or, just simply a lack of Jewish mainstream heroes, gives the team some fans and can even give the Warriors extra motivation on the road to prove that Jews do belong anywhere. Usually no road trip from Milchama is complete without some members of the team going to a Kosher restaurant, local Synagogue, or JCC; to take some pictures, socialize with the machers, and generally present themselves as representatives of Judaism wherever they are.

However, the reaction in Tzvi was more intense than most places. Tzvi, as a new nation to the World Cup with a majority Jewish nation, has been looking for historical analogue for World Cup success and nowhere is that more obvious than in Milchama which, regardless of anything else you can say about the Warriors, they are, by far, the most successful majority Jewish nation in World Cup history. That led to the Warriors getting mobbed at the airport, the whole team being escorted by bus everywhere and the lobby of the hotel Milchama was staying at being swarmed with fans looking for selfies, autographs, or just a few seconds with the Jewish heroes of Milchama. It also made the Warriors get a standing ovation before the game.

Of course, just because the citizens of Tzvi were happy to see Milchama in their first ever qualifying campaign, that did not mean they didn't want the Local XI to win the game and all the good will immediately dissipated at the opening whistle where Doves captain Zenowski immediately put a hard tackle in on Cal Kemet that was lucky to not draw a yellow card. That little exchange summed up the first 15 or so minutes as Tzvi was running like madmen to every ball, winning tackles, and generally shutting down space for Milchama to exploit. Of course, the Doves with their lack of experience, they didn't even play in the BoF! were not able to do much with the ball but instead were missing passes that would have threatened the Milchamian backline or just the defenders getting in the way of creating any real space.

That said, Tzvi did seem like the team more likely to score and it did happen in the 17th minute when Zunowski again got in front of a Warrior pass and made a nice quick outlet pass to Černý on the right wing. Černý then crossed to an unmarked Abraham Havlíček in the box who made easy work with his header. 1-0 to Tzvi, Lamerein's reign in tatters, and pandemonium across the national stadium. Listening to the Tzvi announcers would send even the most ardent Milchamian fans to tears. An incredible moment for the country and their football program.

There is still a football game to play and the Warriors couldn't let something as small as inter-Jewish solidarity stop them from winning. The goal seemed to wake up the Home Team who were finally able to complete two passes in a row. This led to what most observers thought would be the process of the game, Milchama getting the ball, being able to get somewhat deep into Tzvian(?) territory, and then seeing the bus parked with 10 or 11 behind the ball for the Doves. There was no way the Doves were going to hold out forever and when the crossbar was rattled by Millie Koureia in the 28th minute it felt like a matter of time until the Warriors were able to put one through. And so it was when the Dove defender weren't able to close Barry Thomas in the box fast enough as he turned around and fired into the far post for a tie game. 1-1, game on again, and Lamerein a little bit closer to safety.

One of the things that statistics have told us is that the most dangerous time to concede is within 5 minutes after a goal is scored because teams seem to fall asleep for a second and that would have described after the Milchama goal perfectly as right after the kick off to restart Tzvi saw a shot from Yaakov Vesela parried by Entersher just onto the path of captain Zunowski who slotted in the second goal. 2-1 to Tzvi, cue pandemonium part 2.

The expectation in the stadium went even higher after the Doves were able to get into halftime up 2-1. Then the 50th minute ticked away, 55th minute, 60th minute. One could feel a switch in the stadium from "we scored!" to "we held out!" to "we could do it!" Suddenly every Dove kick was a cause for celebration, a completed pass led to an ole, and a foray into Milchamian territory greeted by over 100 decibels of noise. There was only one man who was going to stop it and that was Avi Benbemore. Who made the stadium eerily quiet after one of the finest individual goals you would ever see. Benbemore, slid past 5 Tzvian(?) defenseman before nutmegging the goalie to make it 2-2. It's a goal that will be replayed for years in the Benbemore highlight reel and one that put Tzvi really on the defensive with 18 minutes to go.

This time Milchama was able to button down the hatches and not stupidly concede on the first play after the goal. Good for them! And regular service in the second half resumed. This time with 4 minutes to go Tzvian(?) hearts were broken when a cross from Abby Goldshires found Benbemore leaping up over 2 Dove defenseman to put an unbeatable header on goal. 3-2 Milchama and now it was the Warriors celebrating as the Tzvian(?) stadium went silent for the first time all game. Milchama was able to see out the game and save Daryl Lamerein's job, at least for one more window. We shall see what the MFA wants but for now Milchama can content itself with a 6 point window and the first flickers of a team that doesn't suck.

Tzvi 2 (Havlíček 17, Zunowski 32)
Milchama 3 (Thomas 31, Benbemore 72, 86)

by **Cabo Azure** » Tue Nov 21, 2023 11:49 am

Astograth 0–2 Cabo Azure
Starting XI: Gomez | Soares, M'bah-Pinho, Furtado, Branco | Gontijo, Rathbone, Florencio (off 66') | Gouveia (15'), Magalhaes, Cardoso (51') (c)
Subs: D'Cruz (on 66')
A robust win over a worthy opponent to keep the wheels on the Maçaricas' qualifying campaign. The Azurean team was unusually conservative in view of the Astograthians' pedigree. A well-placed half-volley from Gouveia early on set the tone for what would be an extremely complete performance, while Cardoso sealed the deal with a chip shot early in the first.

Cabo Azure 1-0 Huayramarca
Starting XI: Gomez | Soares, M'bah-Pinho, Furtado, Branco | Andrade, Bastos, Cardoso | Gouveia (off 70'), Mendonça (77'), Silveira (c)
Subs: Santos (on 70')
The three-time Q-League Golden Boot winner and Testiculos short-lister proves once again that the fame and fortune he so publicly enjoys are earned with skill and talent. After a thrilling, exhausting seventy-seven minutes of back and forth football, punctuated by electric attempts from both teams and two goalies standing on their heads, Pio Mendonça sneaked a goal past Mamani. The winning goal went in so quietly that the sold-out Stadio Lagostim was quiet a second before erupting into rapturous cheers.

Projected Starting XI vs Poafmersia: Gomez | Soares, Delgado, Furtado, Branco | Gontijo, Bastos, Rathbone | Ventura, Silveira (c), Cardoso

Projected Starting XI vs Kewlz: Gomez | Costa, M'Bah-Pinho, Furtado, Ferraz | Gontijo, Bastos, Rathbone | Ventura, Magalhaes, Cardoso (c)

Portelo, modern day

In her second year at Maritime University, Princess Solveig took research methods, a lower-division course which served as the gate to most upper-division courses. The final project for that course was a research proposal and literature review, correctly cited, that could in theory lead to a study or article. The university approached research methods from an interdisciplinary perspective, so instead of working within her major, Solveig’s professor in this venture was Dr. Zora Sequeira, assistant professor of economics.

Zora was a handsome woman, sharp featured with a chin-length blond bob and cold blue eyes. The students in the seminar were a smattering of liberal-arts majors; a few of her own from economics, a few from history besides Solveig, and then strays from other departments. When Solveig showed up to the first day of class (she was always a few minutes early, to avoid putting the professors in the position of reprimanding the crown princess), none of them were fazed to be seated next to the crown princess. Maritime was a small school, and she’d been a fixture on campus from her first day.

Solveig’s fixation with shipwrecks might have been considered trite if she were any less earnest or any less determined to follow through with it. Researching the great wrecks, she returned over and over again to the sinking of the Bejia-Flor some hundred years before her birth, and resultant death of Adolfo II, her ancestor and supposedly one of the greatest Azurean kings. Despite the incredible importance of the wreck to the Azurean collective unconscious, there was precious little scholarship to be found, so that it was not difficult for Solveig to come up with a novel approach for her research proposal. Blue eyes sparkling, the young princess told her professor that since the Bejia-Flor sank during a time of war, she wanted to review ships’ logs, particularly from Quebecois ships, to determine whether any of them had seen the ship before she sank.

Dr. Sequeira paid unusual attention to this assignment, partly because the student was the crown princess and partly because though she was no longer a member of the Narrative Council after her resignation, she could see the invisible hand of the Narrative in the request. She typed up a formal request and sent it to the relevant offices in Quebec, telling herself she was doing due diligence on behalf of the princess, but in reality knowing she was still serving the Narrative long after she had resigned her position on the Council.

by **Alasdair I Frosticus** » Tue Nov 21, 2023 1:44 pm

MY CHATGPT ODE TO LEADING QUALIFICATION AT THE HALFWAY STAGE

By Isaac, Prince Imperial
(the worst poet in the multiverse)

Oh, Holy Empire, in Group 13's scene,
With 5 wins and 2 draws, you reign supreme.
Ranked 26th, yet your victory song,
Echoes loud against foes, oh so strong.

Banija, a titan, ranked number one,
Four wins, two losses, their battles done.
But against you, they suffered a sting,
In a 1-0 loss, their hopes took a swing.

Indusse and Sharktail, ranked in their lane,
Yet against your prowess, they can't sustain.
Seventy-sixth and sixty-fifth they stand,
But your dominance covers the land.

Mr Poopyhead's team, unranked and wild,
Two wins, two draws, but you're beguiled.
Damukuni, Vilwandia, and Ethane, they say,
Struggle against your powerful play.

Five wins, two draws, oh what a feat,
Holy Empire, your opponents you beat.
At the Cup's midpoint, your flag unfurled,
Leading Group 13, a remarkable whirl.

Forgive this poem's terrible flow,
In describing your wins, a clumsy show.
Holy Empire, your triumph's tale,
Leaves opponents trembling, looking pale.

Seven verses to capture your might,
In this poetic attempt, a dreadful plight.
But your football prowess, hard to ignore,
In Group 13, you shine evermore.

OOC: It really was written by ChatGPT; I was curious to see if the bad poetry would be any worse than my own intentionally bad IC poetry as Isaac, Prince Imperial.

For the curious, the prompt was:

Write a really bad poem about the Holy Empire leading qualification group 13 at the halfway stage of the 95th edition of the NationStates World Cup. The standings are: 1) Holy Empire (ranked 26), 5 wins, 2 draws, and 0 losses, including a 1-0 win against two-time defending World Cup champions Banija. 2) Banija (ranked 1), 4 wins, 1 draw, and 2 losses. 3) Indusse (ranked 76), 3 wins and 4 draws. 4) Sharktail (ranked 65), 3 wins, 2 draws, and 2 losses. 5) Mr Poopyhead's team (unranked), 2 wins, 2 draws, and 3 losses. 6) Damukuni (ranked 217), 1 win, 2 draws, and 4 losses. 7) Vilwandia (ranked 235) 1 win, 1 draw, and 5 losses. 8 ) Ethane (ranked 132), 0 wins, 3 draws, and 4 losses

I'll write a proper entirely original RP tomorrow; consider this one an experiment

by **Archalit** » Tue Nov 21, 2023 3:18 pm

"Well, this is not a very good seaso-"

"Don't even mention it," Krystol retorted, sighing. "Everyone was so excited, every Archalitian began watching, and now suddenly we're back to mediocrity."

...

A silence filled the room. It was brutally difficult to accept the obvious; it's only been 7 matchdays, and the season's basically over. Whether Archalit will be accepted into the Cup of Harmony is almost out of the picture too despite being reigning medalists.

Finally, a voice broke the stagnant air. "We can't give in," Nisha Lovett firmly declared. "Seven. Seven points. Seven points more than StrayaRoos and we'll pass them. That makes 4. 4 wins on their draws and we can go to the World Cup Final."

"Seems like a longshot," Koa Omaniala replied.

"We can't make it without longshots, Ko."

Another silence befell the room, and as the meeting's end drew nearer, Krystol realized she needed to say something.

"Nisha's right," Krystol said, "it ain't over till the fat lady sings. Besides, we're the only ones who've beaten StrayaRoos, surely we can be the ones to pass them."

Featuring:

Pirates Slipping Out of Contention?
Pirate League Football "Hopeful to Continue" in Coming Days

Pirates Slipping Out of Contention?
Written By Kahale Kekumu
04/23/2036_(ARC)

I loved the Pirates' last season. They came out in a contention spot with 3 other teams to take the final playoff position and it came just down to the wire, the final matchday, to see who won. The Pirates, despite having the most unfavorable odds of the three, still managed to come out on top and take the playoff spot. Now, did they win? No, god no, Chromatika took our winning chances and whipped them straight out the window after crushing us in a comeback 5-3 victory for the Anomalies. While it was an exciting match, the real highlights of last season were that mad dash for playoffs and the Cup of Harmony bronze medal match which proved that Archalit is the biggest newcomer in the sport.

So like, honestly, what the hell is happening this season. It already looked rough when we took a draw against Bigpipstan, and then we had to settle for two back-to-back losses against the top teams, but we can't even find wins against any of the weaker names! The only wins we have are against StrayaRoos (who are somehow in qualifying contention despite that) and Natanians and Nosts (who were our opponents on the literal last matchday). What the hell, guys. I'm starting to question if Krystol Mays' "gambits" were actually any good, cause these roster changes are starting to seem hot garbage for the team. It should've been a red flag when we missed IC-19 finals with a record of 1-2-2, but we were so much worse last IC that it didn't seem to matter.

And there's always the same excuse, with Archalit militarizing it's air force and defunding it's sports teams proportionally, but come on. Really? The PLF isn't even running so the NT gets a lot more practice than others, and they can easily overcome a budget deficit seeing as they've literally been playing together FOR YEARS. The Pirates' World Cup Final hopes already seem doomed, and we're only halfway through the qualification season. Honestly, lets just wait for the Pirate League to come back, and least that'll be more entertaining than this dumpster fire we have going in the National Team.

Pirate League Football "Hopeful to Continue" in Coming Weeks
Written By Iida Akko
04/24/2036_(ARC)

Over the course of this latest off-season, Corsair Football (also known as the Archalit Football Federation) organized the PLF, a multi-stage football tournament between clubs across the nation, finally introducing Archalit to the big stage; club glory. At least it would've, but Corsair Football came out with an announcement shortly after PLF stating that "organizational issues" forced a "delay" in the very first season. However, this delay has, at this point, lasted over a whole Archalitian year, begging the question: where is PLF?

Now, during the delay, the transfer window opened up and international club tournaments ran, and while some clubs managed to secure international trades, there were no tournaments the clubs were eligible for as the season hadn't ended. This meant that there were no real opportunities for players in Archalit at the highest level to play barring some national-level or local club-level playing as well as one-off friendly matches and tournaments.

Fortunately, PLF may finally be making a return, as the COO of Corsair Football, Nisha Lovett, recently came out on record stating that the PLF is up and ready to go, and will hopefully be continuing in the coming off-season. However, this is coming with a pretty big asterisk. The previous season of Corsair Football will be discontinued, the teams, team names, and team locations are being completely shuffled, and the system is being reworked to make for more teams in the league.

Unfortunately, the changes Nisha proposed has prompted some backlash from Archalitian players who've been waiting for a year to get back to club play. "If I've waited this long just to see all these changes," Duke Sondas says, "there's no point waiting for the next mistake they make." Many national players have shared in this sentiment, declaring their interest in participating with other teams, thus begging the other question; if every good player quits, who's there to make the league any good?

General Bulletins

Lyndon Nightmare: "I could tell this season would be a chaotic mess"
Bungki Gungo dethroned as newcomer Noah Mimar wins Pirates Chess Championships
International Cross-Country Championships supposedly in the works by Pirate Athletics

by **HUElavia** » Tue Nov 21, 2023 5:40 pm

HUElavia 2–1 Independent Athletes from Quebec
(Navarro-Hamada 34', Hwangbo 90' | Korniloff-Kouyate 13')
Estadio Nacional, Curumba, HUElavia

West Barack and East Obama 0–1 HUElavia
(Rossi-Rigoni 57' (P))

Xkorinating the FIFA World Cup

Episode 4:
2006 FIFA World Cup

The year is 2006. The 18th edition of the FIFA World Cup is hosted by Germany, their first hosting duty since reunification. Angela Merkel is the Chancellor of Germany. Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest is the highest grossing film of 2006. Bad Day by Daniel Powter is the No. 1 song on Billboard in 2006. Time of Our Lives by Il Divo and Toni Braxton was the official song of the tournament and Celebrate the Day by Herbert Grönemeyer was the official anthem of the tournament. As it is in RL and in our simulations, Brazil enter as the defending champions.

12 stadiums across 12 cities were selected across Germany to host the matches. The Venues were as follows:

Olympiastadion (74,220), Berlin
FIFA WM Stadion Munchen (66,016), Munich
FIFA WM Stadion Dortmund (65,982), Dortmund
FIFA WM Stadion Gelsenkirchen (53,804), Gelsenkirchen
Gottlieb-Daimler-Stadion (53,200), Stuttgart
FIFA WM Stadion Hamburg (51,055), Hamburg
FIFA WM Stadion Frankfurt (48,132), Frankfurt
FIFA WM Stadion Koln (46,120), Cologne
FIFA WM Stadion Hannover (44,652), Hannover
Zentralstadion (44,199), Leipzig
Fritz-Walter Stadion (43,450), Kaiserslautern
Franken Stadion (41,926), Nurenberg

32 teams qualified from all 6 confederations, a first since 1982. The groups were drawn as follows:

Group A:
Germany, Costa Rica, Poland, Ecuador

Group B:
England, Paraguay, Trinidad and Tobago, Sweden

Group C:
Argentina, Ivory Coast, Serbia and Montenegro, Netherlands

Group D:
Mexico, iran, Angola, Portugal

Group E:
Italy, Ghana, United States, Czech Republic

Group F:
Brazil, Croatia, Australia, Japan

Group G:
France, Switzerland, South Korea, Togo

Group H:
Spain, Ukraine, Tunisia, Saudi Arabia

Thus, we proceed forward with our fourth simulation:

Group Stage

MD 1:

Group A
Germany (GER) 3–0 Costa Rica (CRC)
Poland (POL) 1–1 Ecuador (ECU)

  Group A                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Germany                       1   1  0  0    3   0  +3    3
2 Ecuador                       1   0  1  0    1   1   0    1
  Poland                        1   0  1  0    1   1   0    1
4 Costa Rica                    1   0  0  1    0   3  −3    0

Group B
England (ENG) 2–2 Paraguay (PAR)
Trinidad and Tobago (TRI) 2–0 Sweden (SWE)

  Group B                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Trinidad and Tobago           1   1  0  0    2   0  +2    3
2 England                       1   0  1  0    2   2   0    1
  Paraguay                      1   0  1  0    2   2   0    1
4 Sweden                        1   0  0  1    0   2  −2    0

Group C
Argentina (ARG) 1–0 Ivory Coast (CIV)
Serbia and Montenegro (SCG) 0–2 Netherlands (NED)

  Group C                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Netherlands                   1   1  0  0    2   0  +2    3
2 Argentina                     1   1  0  0    1   0  +1    3
3 Ivory Coast                   1   0  0  1    0   1  −1    0
4 Serbia and Montenegro         1   0  0  1    0   2  −2    0

Group D
Mexico (MEX) 0–1 Iran (IRN)
Angola (ANG) 0–1 Portugal (POR)

  Group D                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Iran                          1   1  0  0    1   0  +1    3
  Portugal                      1   1  0  0    1   0  +1    3
3 Angola                        1   0  0  1    0   1  −1    0
  Mexico                        1   0  0  1    0   1  −1    0

Group E
Italy (ITA) 3–2 Ghana (GHA)
United States (USA) 0–3 Czech Republic (CZE)

  Group E                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Czech Republic                1   1  0  0    3   0  +3    3
2 Italy                         1   1  0  0    3   2  +1    3
3 Ghana                         1   0  0  1    2   3  −1    0
4 United States                 1   0  0  1    0   3  −3    0

Group F
Brazil (BRA) 2–1 Croatia (CRO)
Australia (AUS) 1–2 Japan (JPN)

  Group F                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Brazil                        1   1  0  0    2   1  +1    3
  Japan                         1   1  0  0    2   1  +1    3
3 Australia                     1   0  0  1    1   2  −1    0
  Croatia                       1   0  0  1    1   2  −1    0

Group G
France (FRA) 1–1 Switzerland (SUI)
South Korea (KOR) 1–0 Togo (TOG)

  Group G                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 South Korea                   1   1  0  0    1   0  +1    3
2 France                        1   0  1  0    1   1   0    1
  Switzerland                   1   0  1  0    1   1   0    1
4 Togo                          1   0  0  1    0   1  −1    0

Group H
Spain (ESP) 4–0 Ukraine (UKR)
Tunisia (TUN) 2–1 Saudi Arabia (KSA)

  Group H                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Spain                         1   1  0  0    4   0  +4    3
2 Tunisia                       1   1  0  0    2   1  +1    3
3 Saudi Arabia                  1   0  0  1    1   2  −1    0
4 Ukraine                       1   0  0  1    0   4  −4    0

MD 2:

Group A
Costa Rica (CRC) 1–0 Ecuador (ECU)
Germany (GER) 0–2 Poland (POL)

  Group A                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Poland                        2   1  1  0    3   1  +2    4
2 Germany                       2   1  0  1    3   2  +1    3
3 Costa Rica                    2   1  0  1    1   3  −2    3
4 Ecuador                       2   0  1  1    1   2  −1    1

Group B
Paraguay (PAR) 1–0 Sweden (SWE)
England (ENG) 2–1 Trinidad and Tobago (TRI)

  Group B                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 England                       2   1  1  0    4   3  +1    4
2 Paraguay                      2   1  1  0    3   2  +1    4
3 Trinidad and Tobago           2   1  0  1    3   2  +1    3
4 Sweden                        2   0  0  2    0   3  −3    0

Group C
Ivory Coast (CIV) 1–2 Netherlands (NED)
Argentina (ARG) 1–0 Serbia and Montenegro (SCG)

  Group C                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Netherlands                   2   2  0  0    4   1  +3    6
2 Argentina                     2   2  0  0    2   0  +2    6
3 Ivory Coast                   2   0  0  2    1   3  −2    0
4 Serbia and Montenegro         2   0  0  2    0   3  −3    0

Group D
Iran (IRN) 1–1 Portugal (POR)
Mexico (MEX) 3–3 Angola (ANG)

  Group D                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Iran                          2   1  1  0    2   1  +1    4
  Portugal                      2   1  1  0    2   1  +1    4
3 Angola                        2   0  1  1    3   4  −1    1
  Mexico                        2   0  1  1    3   4  −1    1

Group E
Ghana (GHA) 0–1 Czech Republic (CZE)
Italy (ITA) 3–1 United States (USA)

  Group E                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Czech Republic                2   2  0  0    4   0  +4    6
2 Italy                         2   2  0  0    6   3  +3    6
3 Ghana                         2   0  0  2    2   4  −2    0
4 United States                 2   0  0  2    1   6  −5    0

Group F
Croatia (CRO) 2–0 Japan (JPN)
Brazil (BRA) 1–1 Australia (AUS)

  Group F                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Brazil                        2   1  1  0    3   2  +1    4
2 Croatia                       2   1  0  1    3   2  +1    3
3 Japan                         2   1  0  1    2   3  −1    3
4 Australia                     2   0  1  1    2   3  −1    1

Group G
Switzerland (SUI) 1–1 Togo (TOG)
France (FRA) 2–0 South Korea (KOR)

  Group G                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 France                        2   1  1  0    3   1  +2    4
2 South Korea                   2   1  0  1    1   2  −1    3
3 Switzerland                   2   0  2  0    2   2   0    2
4 Togo                          2   0  1  1    1   2  −1    1

Group H
Ukraine (UKR) 3–2 Saudi Arabia (KSA)
Spain (ESP) 1–0 Tunisia (TUN)

  Group H                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Spain                         2   2  0  0    5   0  +5    6
2 Tunisia                       2   1  0  1    2   2   0    3
3 Ukraine                       2   1  0  1    3   6  −3    3
4 Saudi Arabia                  2   0  0  2    3   5  −2    0

MD 3:

Group A
Poland (POL) 3–0 Costa Rica (CRC)
Ecuador (ECU) 1–1 Germany (GER)

  Group A                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Poland                        3   2  1  0    6   1  +5    7
2 Germany                       3   1  1  1    4   3  +1    4
3 Costa Rica                    3   1  0  2    1   6  −5    3
4 Ecuador                       3   0  2  1    2   3  −1    2

Group B
Trinidad and Tobago (TRI) 0–3 Paraguay (PAR)
Sweden (SWE) 0–2 England (ENG)

  Group B                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Paraguay                      3   2  1  0    6   2  +4    7
2 England                       3   2  1  0    6   3  +3    7
3 Trinidad and Tobago           3   1  0  2    3   5  −2    3
4 Sweden                        3   0  0  3    0   5  −5    0

Group C
Serbia and Montenegro (SCG) 0–1 Ivory Coast (CIV)
Netherlands (NED) 4–1 Argentina (ARG)

  Group C                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Netherlands                   3   3  0  0    8   2  +6    9
2 Argentina                     3   2  0  1    3   4  −1    6
3 Ivory Coast                   3   1  0  2    2   3  −1    3
4 Serbia and Montenegro         3   0  0  3    0   4  −4    0

Group D
Angola (ANG) 0–1 Iran (IRN)
Portugal (POR) 2–1 Mexico (MEX)

  Group D                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Portugal                      3   2  1  0    4   2  +2    7
2 Iran                          3   2  1  0    3   1  +2    7
3 Mexico                        3   0  1  2    4   6  −2    1
4 Angola                        3   0  1  2    3   5  −2    1

Group E
United States (USA) 1–1 Ghana (GHA)
Czech Republic (CZE) 2–1 Italy (ITA)

  Group E                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Czech Republic                3   3  0  0    6   1  +5    9
2 Italy                         3   2  0  1    7   5  +2    6
3 Ghana                         3   0  1  2    3   5  −2    1
4 United States                 3   0  1  2    2   7  −5    1

Group F
Australia (AUS) 0–0 Croatia (CRO)
Japan (JPN) 1–2 Brazil (BRA)

  Group F                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Brazil                        3   2  1  0    5   3  +2    7
2 Croatia                       3   1  1  1    3   2  +1    4
3 Japan                         3   1  0  2    3   5  −2    3
4 Australia                     3   0  2  1    2   3  −1    2

Group G
South Korea (KOR) 1–1 Switzerland (SUI)
Togo (TOG) 0–3 France (FRA)

  Group G                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 France                        3   2  1  0    6   1  +5    7
2 South Korea                   3   1  1  1    2   3  −1    4
3 Switzerland                   3   0  3  0    3   3   0    3
4 Togo                          3   0  1  2    1   5  −4    1

Group H
Tunisia (TUN) 1–1 Ukraine (UKR)
Saudi Arabia (KSA) 2–1 Spain (ESP)

  Group H                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Spain                         3   2  0  1    6   2  +4    6
2 Tunisia                       3   1  1  1    3   3   0    4
3 Ukraine                       3   1  1  1    4   7  −3    4
4 Saudi Arabia                  3   1  0  2    5   6  −1    3

Round-of-16

Poland (POL) 1–2 England (ENG) FIFA WM Stadion Munchen, Munich

Netherlands (NED) 1–1 Iran (IRN) (1–1 AET) (5–4 pen.) Zentralstadion, Leipzig

Czech Republic (CZE) 0–3 Croatia (CRO) Fritz-Walter Stadion, Kaiserslautern

France (FRA) 2–0 Tunisia (TUN) FIFA WM Stadion Koln, Cologne

Paraguay (PAR) 1–2 Germany (GER) Gottlieb-Daimler-Stadion, Stuttgart

Portugal (POR) 1–1 Argentina (ARG) (2–2 AET) (3–4 pen.) Franken Stadion, Nurenberg

Brazil (BRA) 2–0 Italy (ITA) FIFA WM Stadion Dortmund, Dortmund

Spain (ESP) 1–0 South Korea (KOR) FIFA WM Stadion Hannover, Hannover

Quarter-Finals

England (ENG) 3–2 Netherlands (NED) Olympiastadion, Berlin

Croatia (CRO) 0–1 France (FRA) FIFA WM Stadion Hamburg, Hamburg

Germany (GER) 1–0 Argentina (ARG) FIFA WM Stadion Gelsenkirchen, Gelsenkirchen

Brazil (BRA) 2–2 Spain (ESP) (2–2 AET) (2–3 pen.) FIFA WM Stadion Frankfurt, Frankfurt

Semi-Finals

England (ENG) 1–2 France (FRA) FIFA WM Stadion Dortmund, Dortmund

Germany (GER) 1–2 Spain (ESP) FIFA WM Stadion Munchen, Munich

3rd Place Match

England (ENG) 0–2 Germany (GER) Gottlieb-Daimler-Stadion, Stuttgart

The Final

Much like RL, the World Cup trophy returns to Europe, albeit with major differences. France wins their 1st World Cup in this simulation, which would've been their 2nd in RL. Zidane would have retired as a World Cup champion in his final match as a footballer. Spain fall short in their first World Cup Final, but after gritting out close results, this would spark the start of their Golden Generation 2 years earlier than in RL. Germany as hosts finish where they finish, but suffer more for the results than in RL, thus meaning they underperform for the most part. England overachieve for the most part, making a Semi-Finals for the first time since 1990, but still fall short with a fairly stacked squad. Brazil and Argentina reach the same round they were eliminated in, despite not firing on all cylinders overall. Netherlands does better than what they did in RL, while Croatia overachieve as a whole making it to the QFs, which is a first in our simulations, but would be the 2nd time taking into account of 1998 IRL. The biggest surprise elimination was Italy going out in the Ro16 in a heavyweight match against Brazil, not winning the tournament like IRL. One could maybe say they underperformed due to Calciopoli. Portugal also underperform in this simulation, unlike finishing 4th IRL. Likely as well, the Portugal-Argentina match could've been the first time Cristiano Ronaldo and Messi played against each other not just in the World Cup, but in football in general.

The biggest surprise eliminations included the likes of Mexico, a seeded team, along with solid hopes Sweden. It is Sweden who finish as the worst of the tournament with 0 Points and -5 GD, doing slightly worse than Serbia and Montenegro who also had 0 Points, but -4 GD, which they were the actual worst team of the tournament IRL. Tunisia and South Korea do better than IRL, both advancing out of the GS, with Tunisia replacing Ghana as the lone African representative as it had happened IRL. Australia's elimination in the GS deviates from IRL, where Australia fail to become the first Oceania team to advance from the GS, coming in the last year before they join the AFC. Notably, all of CONCACAF fail to make it past the Group Stage, something that had not happened since Spain 1982. At the end, the tournament shook out with the strongest coming out on top, especially with the stacked QFs that happened.

by **Eshialand** » Tue Nov 21, 2023 5:46 pm

Halfway Home

Close, but no dice.

The Owls were just one game from something that never even felt possible at the start of this campaign: a perfect first half. A 2-3 loss in Cardenao ended those hopes, but that didn't do much to hurt the team's hopes. 6-0-1 for the first half? That was more than anyone could ever hope for, even the most optimistic in the nation.

The most optimistic person in this country right now was probably none other than Kenny Morgan, who took a good look at the table at the halfway mark and thought "this really is our chance, huh?"

The Owls' main threat before the last couple of games had been Brusseldorf, but they drew Baker Park before getting blown out by Hapilopper. Cardenao was moving up into their rightful position, but their slow start held them back a fair amount. There were 5 points of leeway between Eshialand and second place, and Coach Morgan knew that this team could keep that lead, especially with the next two games being Myrtle Beach and Rea San Vegas...

"Alright team," he called out after the game, "time to chat about how things are going..."

"Oh no, one loss and we're already getting 'the treatment'"... Faith Krupp bemoaned.
"Now now now, never ever assume what I'm about to say..."
"So what were you going to say?"
"Actually, I think you did a great job out there and we need to keep up the good work!"
"Buuuuttttt..."
"But what Faith? What did you think I was gonna say?"
"Something about not losing again?"
"Wow, you really don't have any faith in me! That's sort of ironic, isn't it... and Dr. Morgan has just the prescription for that. You're starting in place of Jake next match!"
"WHAT?!?!" Both Faith and Jake Harran said in unison.
"It's simple, really... you've been feeling bad about not getting much playing time! Solution: get a start in there, that'll help ya feel better."

This plan sounded crazy, but Melissa Carey nodded as if to agree "you're onto something, Kenny." Only time would end up telling whether he really did know this team better than they knew themselves or if he was just being a little bit kooky this time around.

"Oi Karsten, it's Tournament Report time again!"
"Tournament Report again Josh? I feel like it was just yesterday we did this!"
"Nope, it's been a couple weeks, so it's time to check back in with our beloved Owls on another edition of Eshialand's favorite sports show!"

"So Karsten, I assume you've seen the table, right?"
"Not lately, no..."
"Well then here you go!"

Group 2                                      Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
1 Eshialand                                    7    6   0   1    22   13   +9    18
2 Brusseldorf                                  7    4   1   2    15   10   +5    13
3 Cardenao                                     7    4   1   2    15   14   +1    13
4 Commonwealth of Baker Park                   7    2   4   1    22   17   +5    10
  Hapilopper                                   7    3   1   3    22   17   +5    10
6 Aleirave                                     7    2   1   4    12   16   −4     7
7 City of Myrtle Beach                         7    2   1   4     7   14   −7     7
8 Rea San Vegas                                7    0   1   6     5   19  −14     1

"What happened to Aleirave?"
"We don't talk about it! Nothing good though..."
"How bad..."
"Four goal loss to Baker Park."
"What??"
"And Baker Park got their fourth draw to a team ranked below rank 100 in the standings by the way."
"Okay but that's Brusseldorf, we knew they'd be tough for everyone to deal with."
"Oh well, that's the first half in the can. Time for everything to basically reset, one more matchup between each pair of teams. What are you liking here today?"
"Well first, I sort of want to see what would happen if every match went the way the ranks would suggest with no upsets anywhere... have Eshialand draw Aleirave though, since they're too close in rank to decide who wins that."
"You just want an ego boost."
"Maybe. You know what though? For good measure, make Myrtle Beach and Hapilopper draw each other too, so it doesn't look too biased."
"What about Rea San Vegas?"
"No mercy for them."

Group 2                                      Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
1 Commonwealth of Baker Park                  14    9   4   1    29   17  +12    31
2 Eshialand                                   14   10   1   3    26   15  +11    31
3 Cardenao                                    14   10   1   3    21   15   +6    31
4 Brusseldorf                                 14    7   1   6    18   14   +4    22
5 Aleirave                                    14    6   2   6    12   18   −6    20
6 Hapilopper                                  14    4   2   8    23   22   +1    14
7 City of Myrtle Beach                        14    3   2   9     8   19  −11    11
8 Rea San Vegas                               14    0   1  13     5   26  −21     1

"Mmmm, hot and hyperspeculative, just like mama used to make."
"For those keeping track at home, I've assigned the draws a score of 0-0, and the wins all 1-0. That's where these GDs are coming from. As you can see, Eshialand goes to the playoffs in this scenario... I like this scenario."
"I wish we lived in this world..."
"And just remember viewers, THIS IS FAR FROM GUARANTEED. I know we live in a nation that loves high high hopes and trumped-up headlines, but I don't want that stuff to be generated. This is hyperspeculative and based on a scenario where there are no upsets anywhere, except for Eshialand drawing Aleirave away because ehhhhhhhhh that's not muchn of a stretch. Don't get your hopes up, the second half will likely not be anywhere near as good as the first--"
"Josh, give it up, it's too late. You've already said too much, people are already making headlines and memes of what you've said and shown."
"You're right, no closing Pandora's Box... best we can do is close this broadcast, really."
"Until next time!"
"Toodles!"

by **City of Myrtle Beach** » Tue Nov 21, 2023 8:15 pm

MSN | Good Morning Football WCQ edition

Bob: Good morning everyone, I am your host Bob here with James today and welcome to Good Morning Football this Sunday morning. This excellent week led to two victories for our Myrtle Beach team, one on the road against Aleirave and one right here in Kitty Hawk against Rea San Vegas. The turnout at the latter game was much higher than expected given that Rea San Vegas sounds like the city from Great Vehicle Snatchers 6, and many fans had to watch the game from outside the stadium. In fact, it's even rumored that people used boats to get close to the stadium and watch the game from there while accompanied with a radio, which are apparently still used.

Matchday 6 | Group 2
somewhere ig | 88F Cloudy | Kickoff 6:00 pm | Attendance: 28,774

Aleirave 0

1 Myrtle Beach

35' Farmer

James: Let's talk about our first match this week, away at Aleirave. Now, these guys were Baptism of Fire 78 winners, so coming off of a 3rd place finish in Baptism of Fire 82, the Myrtle Beach and Aleirave team seemed evenly matched. Which is what I would say if they weren't nearly 150 places apart in the rankings. Despite that, Myrtle was still able to get one goal in and win the game.

Bob: Let's talk about that one goal for a moment. It was truly a majestic header by Brian Farmer. He hit that ball with the power of the sun and it flew into the goal. It was so beautiful. It blinded anyone who saw it, including the fans sitting behind the goal, who wandered around the stands for the remainder of the game.

James: We can't talk about Aleirave vs Myrtle Beach without talking about Austin Potts, though.

Bob: That's right, he came on the field in the eleventh hour and stopped an Aleirave advance that could have led to a goal. We're all very thankful for that one, I'd say.

Matchday 7 | Group 2
Kitty Hawk Field, Kitty Hawk, Myrtle Beach | 84F Raining and Windy | Kickoff 8:00 pm (Postponed from 6 to 8 due to inclement weather) | Attendance: 42,503

Myrtle Beach 1

0 Rea San Vegas

65' Fulton

James: Now our second match this week, the rainy day against Rea San Vegas. The Myrtle Beach manager was insistent on postponing the match to the next day due to the rain bands produced by landfalling Hurricane Walter in far southern New Fernia, but the match officials said that the rain and wind was fine. Despite the rainy day, the stadium was filled to the brim with fans. The stadium offered free ponchos to fans, but they ran out around the 25,000 mark as this match was predicted to be much less popular due to the rain.

Bob: Like the match earlier in the week, this was once again a 1-0 win for Myrtle Beach. This time around, however, we had quite a bit more randomness in how the match was played by both teams.

James: Exactly, like how Mathis used his waterbending skills to surround a San Vegas player in water and cast them off into the ocean, never to be seen again.

Bob: That was an excellent play from Mathis- that player was really pushing on the Myrtle defense. I know, I know, some of you "football purists" out there say that throwing a player outside of the stadium isn't in the "spirit of the game" but I want you to point me to the section of the Laws of the Game that says you can't use waterbending to remove a player from the game.

James: You'll have to wait a while because, eh, it's not in there.

Bob: That's right. And "football purists" will be even more angry when they hear about Jeremy Fulton's 65th minute goal where he kicked the ball so high and so fast that it exceeded escape velocity and did a full orbit of the Earth, then landed back in the stadium where Fulton kicked it in for a nice 1-0 lead for Myrtle.

James: Some may be asking how that was allowed. It's simple: the ball passed the clouds while the ref could see it was still in the stadium, and it left the clouds inside the stadium, so the ref said it was good.

Bob: Either way, this two-win streak has been great and the entire country is praying it continues longer. Next matchday we play Eshialand at home, and the following one we go to Brusseldorf to play away. We didn't do well against either of these teams the first time, but everyone's hoping that everything goes better the second time around.

# Group 2                                    Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
1 Eshialand                                    7    6   0   1    22   13   +9    18
2 Brusseldorf                                  7    4   1   2    15   10   +5    13
3 Cardenao                                     7    4   1   2    15   14   +1    13
4 Commonwealth of Baker Park                   7    2   4   1    22   17   +5    10
  Hapilopper                                   7    3   1   3    22   17   +5    10
6 Aleirave                                     7    2   1   4    12   16   −4     7
7 City of Myrtle Beach                         7    2   1   4     7   14   −7     7
8 Rea San Vegas                                7    0   1   6     5   19  −14     1

by **StrayaRoos** » Tue Nov 21, 2023 10:32 pm

StrayaRoos 6-5 Bigpipstan
Kewell '17 Kerr '19, '31 C.Kaiplo '39 Keane '68 Vidya '71
StrayaRoos 6-3 Jeruselem
Kerr '14, '26 Karmea '29 Kewell '56 Vidya '67,'88

In one of the most successful qualifing windows in Roosian World Cup history, The emus are sitting 2nd in their group, and looking hungry for more wins, and potentially even a direct spot into the World Cup, if we take down Valanora in what would be one hell of an upset. The current position we're in is thanks to two high-scoring games, 6-5 versus lowly-ranked Bigpipstan, and 6-3 against 41st-ranked Jeruselem. The victories put us 3 points clear of Jeruselem, and also 3 goals ahead on Goal Diffrencial, which might come into play later if we need it. The change in fortunes since the last World Cup campaign may be all down to one man, New manager Calixo Conti, who won IAC18 with his native Juvencus as assistant manager, and has shined in charge of the Emus, only having lost once in seven games, and breathing life into the team, which had sucsessive failures to even challenge in the previous two editions of WCQs. Next up is Britonisea away, then hosting Archalit, who beat us 3-0 in the reverse fixture.

by **Yakk** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 1:14 am

Yak Empire continues to impress!
Haven't we met somewhere before?
Stop me if you've heard that before

YAK EMPIRE - A very unexpected run is forming in the Yak Empire. The Yak Empire is slowly putting together a run for the ages. In a game played in front of a wildly partisan crowd of , the Yak national team took down the historically strong but unranked Barunia team 4-3. A fantastic late scoring rush set up the win, but the hero had to be keeper Egered Khad had two crucial saves including one at the exact last second that lead his team to preserve a quick-starting 4-3 game.

Down 3-2 after an hour Vitaly Openka took a corner kick, Sohkmaat Tsedinaat tried to head the ball in, but missed. Thankfully Tsagaantsoojiin Oryaangabar was there. The 28 year old from Alangabaat took the rebound and kicked it by Michael Rippin. The eventual game winner was scored by reserve player Jin Tinpeg. Jin was subbed on after 78 minutes and made an impact rather quickly. In what has to be on of the most odd goals the Yak Empire has ever scored. Tinpeg took a shot that hit the the crossbar and ricocheted in, giving the Yak Empire a 4-3 lead. But later in an interview Tinpeg states

I saw out of the corner of my eye, #20 (Tsedinaat). I went to pass it to him but I just didn't hit the ball right with my foot and it actually benefitted me instead!

Meanwhile fresh off his historic dive to the bottom of Yak Empire's deepest lake, Emperor Nyam-Orgil I was attending the game in Barunia. A fact that the Barunia TV Feed made mention of, even commenting on his scientific dive!

YAK EMPIRE - 4
Oryaangabar 18' 66'
Brooks 7' (og)
Tinpeg 73'

BARUNIA - 3
Robotham 31' 50'
Carter 24'

YAK EMPIRE - 3
Oryaangabar 4' 60'
Orgaat 68'

WEST KHARAKIA - 2
Openka 17' (og)
??? 90+5'

World Cup 95 Roleplay Thread

David Key on David Key

Tina Falconer on Tina Falconer

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