[TITLE] More Skin Please
[DESCRIPTION] A recent fire at a market in @@CAPITAL@@ led to a large number of burn victims. Those with the most serious injuries had to be air-lifted to Brancaland due to a lack of skin banks.
[VALIDITY] not great health spending
[OPTION] "We can't keep air-lifting all our victims to every corner of @@REGION@@," proclaims Dr. @@RANDOMNAME@@, Head of the Dermatology Unit at @@CAPITAL@@ General Hospital. "@@NAME@@ needs modern skin banks built in every major city, as well as info-campaigns to persuade @@DEMONYMPLURAL@@ to donate their skin after their death."
[EFFECT] coffins are lighter than they used to be
[OPTION] "I don't see many citizens lining up to donate their skin," sighs Dr. @@RANDOMNAME@@, as @@HE@@ picks off a bit of dried skin, then keeps it in a matchbox. "There are still many people who believe they should be buried 'whole', plus donated skin can only be stored for a maximum of five years. We need those skin banks, but there simply has to be compulsory skin donation upon death for everyone."
[EFFECT] open-cask coffins are a thing of the past
[OPTION] "Yuk!" exclaims supermodel @@RANDOMNAME@@, as @@HE@@ pats @@HIS@@ porcelain skin with affection. "What if you graft some wrinkly person's skin onto my body? No thanks! It seems to me that prevention is better than cure. Just stick a fire prevention leaflet through every home in @@NAME@@. That should do the trick, then we can all keep our own beautiful skin."
[EFFECT] a fire can be starved of oxygen by dropping a large pile of fire prevention leaflets onto it
[DESCRIPTION] A recent fire at a market in @@CAPITAL@@ led to a large number of burn victims. Those with the most serious injuries had to be air-lifted to Brancaland due to a lack of skin banks.
[VALIDITY] not great health spending
[OPTION] "We can't keep air-lifting all our victims to every corner of @@REGION@@," proclaims Dr. @@RANDOMNAME@@, Head of the Dermatology Unit at @@CAPITAL@@ General Hospital. "@@NAME@@ needs modern skin banks built in every major city, as well as info-campaigns to persuade @@DEMONYMPLURAL@@ to donate their skin after their death."
[EFFECT] coffins are lighter than they used to be
[OPTION] "I don't see many citizens lining up to donate their skin," sighs Dr. @@RANDOMNAME@@, as @@HE@@ picks off a bit of dried skin, then keeps it in a matchbox. "There are still many people who believe they should be buried 'whole', plus donated skin can only be stored for a maximum of five years. We need those skin banks, but there simply has to be compulsory skin donation upon death for everyone."
[EFFECT] open-cask coffins are a thing of the past
[OPTION] "Yuk!" exclaims supermodel @@RANDOMNAME@@, as @@HE@@ pats @@HIS@@ porcelain skin with affection. "What if you graft some wrinkly person's skin onto my body? No thanks! It seems to me that prevention is better than cure. Just stick a fire prevention leaflet through every home in @@NAME@@. That should do the trick, then we can all keep our own beautiful skin."
[EFFECT] a fire can be starved of oxygen by dropping a large pile of fire prevention leaflets onto it
[TITLE] More Skin Please
[DESCRIPTION] A recent fire at a market in @@CAPITAL@@ led to a large number of burn victims. Those with the most serious injuries had to be air-lifted to Brancaland due to a lack of skin banks.
[VALIDITY] not great health spending, doesn't have vat / clone policies
[OPTION] "We can't keep air-lifting all our victims to every corner of @@REGION@@," proclaims Dr. @@RANDOMNAME@@, Head of the Dermatology Unit at @@CAPITAL@@ General Hospital. "@@NAME@@ needs modern skin banks built in every major city, as well as info-campaigns to persuade @@DEMONYMPLURAL@@ to donate their skin after their death."
[EFFECT] coffins are lighter than they used to be
[OPTION] "I don't see many citizens lining up to donate their skin," sighs Dr. @@RANDOMNAME@@, as @@HE@@ picks off a bit of dried skin, then keeps it in a matchbox. "There are still many people who believe they should be buried 'whole', plus donated skin can only be stored for a maximum of five years. We need those skin banks, but there simply has to be compulsory skin donation upon death for everyone."
[EFFECT] open-cask coffins are a thing of the past
[OPTION] "Yuk!" exclaims supermodel @@RANDOMNAME@@, as @@HE@@ pats @@HIS@@ porcelain skin with affection. "What if you graft some wrinkly person's skin onto my body? No thanks! Everyone knows that when bushfires occur, the flora always grows back stronger, healthier and more beautiful than before. If anyone gets burnt, just let Mother Nature take her course, and then they can have skin almost as beautiful as mine."
[EFFECT] getting burnt is a rite of passage for teenage pop star wannabes
[DESCRIPTION] A recent fire at a market in @@CAPITAL@@ led to a large number of burn victims. Those with the most serious injuries had to be air-lifted to Brancaland due to a lack of skin banks.
[VALIDITY] not great health spending, doesn't have vat / clone policies
[OPTION] "We can't keep air-lifting all our victims to every corner of @@REGION@@," proclaims Dr. @@RANDOMNAME@@, Head of the Dermatology Unit at @@CAPITAL@@ General Hospital. "@@NAME@@ needs modern skin banks built in every major city, as well as info-campaigns to persuade @@DEMONYMPLURAL@@ to donate their skin after their death."
[EFFECT] coffins are lighter than they used to be
[OPTION] "I don't see many citizens lining up to donate their skin," sighs Dr. @@RANDOMNAME@@, as @@HE@@ picks off a bit of dried skin, then keeps it in a matchbox. "There are still many people who believe they should be buried 'whole', plus donated skin can only be stored for a maximum of five years. We need those skin banks, but there simply has to be compulsory skin donation upon death for everyone."
[EFFECT] open-cask coffins are a thing of the past
[OPTION] "Yuk!" exclaims supermodel @@RANDOMNAME@@, as @@HE@@ pats @@HIS@@ porcelain skin with affection. "What if you graft some wrinkly person's skin onto my body? No thanks! Everyone knows that when bushfires occur, the flora always grows back stronger, healthier and more beautiful than before. If anyone gets burnt, just let Mother Nature take her course, and then they can have skin almost as beautiful as mine."
[EFFECT] getting burnt is a rite of passage for teenage pop star wannabes