TEAM HAPILOPPERFull Nation Name: The Dominion of Hapilopper
Trigramme: HAP
Nickname: The Haps
Team Colors: Blue, Green and White
Info:It is a new beginning, alright. Team Hapilopper came out of nowhere to make a run at the semifinals of the most recent AOCAF before getting knocked off in one of the greatest matches ever played, against Banija. Their placing gave Hapiloppians new life. Sure, some will say the AOCAF was depleted because of recent unfortunate political events that have only done more harm than good for everyone involved, but the fact is, it gave Hapiloppians new life and new hope. This team hardly resembles that team that made that semifinal run in the AOCAF, and it resembles even less the team that slogged through multiple poor showings in World Cup qualifiers. Instead, this is a team that is young, hungry, and full of enthusiasm. If anything, it resembles the Team Hapilopper that played and conquered the 70th Baptism of Fire. They're led by one remaining first generation player, the controversial Nathan Ellis, who has evolved from being a homicidal thug to being a leader of men.
Style Mod: +3My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:Choose my goalscorers: Yes
Godmod scoring events: TG me first, or ping me on the NS Sports Discord, and we'll talk about it
RP injuries to my players: Yes, but TG me if you want to do something serious
Godmod injuries to my players: TG me first, or ping me on the NS Sports Discord, and we'll talk about it
Hand out yellow cards to my players: Yes
Hand out red cards to my players: TG me first, or ping me on the NS Sports Discord, and we'll talk about it
Godmod other events: Yes, but TG me first
RP Coronavirus-related events: No. A RL pandemic does not exist in Hapilopper and Hapiloppians do not have it.
COACHING STAFF:HEAD COACH: Thom Perkins
ASSISTANT COACH: Buddy Martinez
ASSISTANT MANAGER: Anthony Welch
GOALKEEPING COACH: Willy Stone
TRAINER: Marc James
TECHNICAL DIRECTOR: Jim McNeil
PHYSIO: Russ Oliver
Stadium:Capital Stadium, Hapilopper City, Hapilopper
Built: 1970 | Seating Capacity: 66,025 | Open-Air | Artificial Turf
(Pictured: Capital Stadium in gridiron configuration)Capital Stadium, Hapilopper's de facto national stadium, is the last of Hapilopper's classic cookie-cutter venues, used for a variety of applications, including the Hapilopper City Nationals baseball team, the Hapilopper National Baseball Team and is the home of Team Hapilopper. As is custom with cookie-cutter stadiums, the park is completely symmetrical and is surrounded by multiple decks of stands, typically filled with screaming fans when the home team is doing well. Back in the 1970s, the HC Nationals, and their vaunted "National Machine" dominated Hapiloppian baseball, and brought over four million fans through the turnstiles on six occasions. Hapiloppian fans have vowed to come to Capital Stadium in force for Team Hapilopper games. Typically, Hapiloppian fans, including the members of the "Traveling Thrashers" supporters group are among the wildest fans in sport, and promise to be exactly that for the World Cup. Expect to see fans dancing along to 1970s funk music, slamming drums as loudly as possible, waving their flags, and throwing streamers for every Hapiloppian goal.
Uniforms:To be completed
THE PLAYERS:#1 - BILLY SOLOMON | Goalkeeper | Age: 23 | Kicks: Left | twii.tur: @billy_solomon | Club: Hap City Highway Patrol
Style of Play: Sweeper Keeper | Speed: Slow | Physicality: Low | Attitude: Intense
Billy Solomon will be the first to tell you that he's a little bit nervous being out there. One of the new breed of Hapiloppian footballers, Solomon is not as well-known as some of his counterparts in Hapiloppian football, and certainly not as famous as his direct predecessor, Cooter Harris. But that's just fine. He's still young, and he's got a bright future ahead of him. He's a highly efficient goalkeeper as well, averaging one goal allowed per 135 minutes of play. Away from the pitch, Solomon is known for sharing uplifting images over social media, with the intention of "leaving a smile on everyone's face, whenever I can. We've got to make this world a better place."
#2 - LEWIS PRYOR | Defenseman/Left Wingback | Age: 22 | Kicks: Right | twii.tur: @pryor60 | Club: The Soldiers of Hap City
Style of Play: Zone Defense | Speed: Fast | Physicality: Moderate | Attitude: Professional
For two years now, Lewis Pryor has patrolled the backfield of Capital Stadium with frightening precision, being able to stop an offensive effort with tremendous ease. His style of play is seen as "physical without going too far," and while Lewis will take a card or two, that's almost to be expected from him playing defense. Last year, Lewis accrued 11 yellow cards and three red cards - two because of card accumulation and one straight red, and donated money to a local children's hospital for each card received. Lewis said he modeled it off of HTN's highly controversial "They Crash, You Win!" sweepstakes from the Hapiloppian Grand Prix.
#3 - ACE BOONE | Defenseman/Right Wingback | Age: 24 | Kicks: Right | twii.tur: (none) | Club: West Hampton Sports Club
Style of Play: Man-To-Man | Speed: Medium-Fast | Physicality: Moderate | Attitude: Antisocial
You remember those annoying jerks in high school that would try to piss you off any chance they got? The one that would make your life miserable, or at least try to, as you tried to get from class to class? Ace Boone most likely patterns himself off of these kinds of people. Hell, he probably was one in high school. These aren't the kind of people that will stuff you into a gym locker or drench you at the water fountain, but they're the ones that are annoying pests, and will say the most obnoxious things to you to try to piss you off. Ace plays man-to-man defense that way, getting right up in the face of a midfielder or a striker. Rumors persist about Boone saying some real obnoxious things to forwards, too, but he's not talking.
#4 - JEROLD DICKMAN | Defenseman/Defensive Sweeper | Age: 20 | Kicks: Left | twii.tur: @JerryDMan | Club: Hap City Highway Patrol
Style of Play: Zone Defense | Speed: Fast | Physicality: Oh Hell Yes | Attitude: Asshole
The last time Jerold Dickman appeared on an international stage, he was being physically led away from the pitch at Old Club Stadium in Taeshan after starting a bench-clearing brawl between the Hapilopper and Xanneria under-18 squads. Dickman was asked to receive professional help for his actions, and all indications are that, yes, he got the professional help, but since joining the Hapilopper City Highway Patrol team last year, Dickman has started to revert to his old physical style of play. Not on the level of Nathan Ellis's barbarism, but he's getting there. It will be interesting to see how Ellis works with Dickman - will he take the young Dickman under his wing? After all, many suggest that Dickman now is what Nate was when he was 20 years old.
#5 - NATHAN ELLIS | Defenseman/Centerback Stopper | Age: 33 | Kicks: Right | twii.tur: @NateEllis | Club: Southfell United (Nephara)
Style of Play: Homicidal | Speed: Medium-Fast | Physicality: Oh Hell Yes | Attitude: A Leader of Men
He's the last one left. Nathan Ellis is the final player remaining out of Hapilopper's original team, that team that won the 70th Baptism of Fire in such a dominant manner, that everyone predicted nothing but greatness coming from Hapilopper. And it almost came, but then it didn't. Every other player from that legendary Baptism of Fire squad has either retired, been drummed out of the international team or just plain left. But Nathan Ellis will, and this sounds horrifying, serve as the captain of Team Hapilopper. There's no word on how many years Nate has left, but you just have to think Nate wants to see the inside of a World Cup proper before he retires. He's gone through so much and seen so much that he wished he hadn't seen. And so much that he probably caused himself. One wonders if his age will mellow him out. One would hope so.
#6 - MAVERICK KING | Midfielder | Age: 23 | Kicks: Left | twii.tur: @MavKing | Club: United Hampton Cities
Style of Play: Defensive | Speed: Medium | Physicality: Heavy | Attitude: Professional
With a name like "Maverick King," you probably have to think he got a lot of attention when he was in school. He probably heard it all the time from his classmates. "You're the Maverick King?" kids would ask. "You look like a fat chump to me!" All the jokes. All the nastiness. And Maverick King wanted to get past it. And then one day he snapped, body-slamming a bully to the ground. A teacher, concerned about what could happen, told Maverick to consider getting into soccer. And so he did, channeling his anger and frustration into soccer, being a better player, and getting in shape. He takes the heckling in stride and channels it to become a better footballer.
#7 - JAMES HUDDLESTON | Midfielder | Age: 24 | Kicks: Right | twii.tur: (none) | Club: FC Buckridge
Style of Play: Defensive | Speed: Fast | Physicality: Moderate | Attitude: Determined
So, you know how major sports stars get off a bus and arrive at the stadium with those huge headphones covering their ears? Many listen to all kinds of music. Country music. House music. Rock music. Metal. Rap. Jimmy Huddleston, however, is listening to old radio broadcasts from the HASCAR Radio Network, which does the radio coverage of the HASCAR Challenge Cup stock car racing series in Hapilopper, as well as the Super Skychief 500 NSSCRA race. Jimmy's father, Greg, is the chief announcer for the network, and has been for over 25 years. Jimmy Huddleston could be listening to last year's Super Skychief 500 and the bone-chilling call of Drake Stevenson chasing down Kai Qiang. Jimmy says it gets him in the right frame of mind to play ball, and to play his brand of defensive football. And there's few players in Hapilopper that can play the midfield like Jimmy Huddleston can.
#8 - WILLIAM ALTENBERRY | Midfielder | Age: 22 | Kicks: Right | twii.tur: @William_Altenberry | Club: Pinkerton City SC
Style of Play: Offensive | Speed: Fast | Physicality: Heavy | Attitude: Friendly
William Altenberry has already said he's a Pinkerton lifer. Born and raised in Pinkerton, a smaller town on the southern part of Hapilopper, Altenberry enjoys playing in front of those he has known his entire life. Teachers, school friends, his youth group at church, his relatives - ALL the relatives, Altenberry enjoys going out there, jockeying for position against his opponents and occasionally scoring goals that he'll invariably dedicated to his high school sweetheart, Ashley. How sweet. But there's a different side of Altenberry on the pitch that his very friendly nature belies. Altenberry can - and will - get into card trouble as he fights for the ball. Not on the level of, say, Nate Ellis or Jerold Dickman, but he'll go for it.
#9 - HERB NORTHROP | Midfielder | Age: 22 | Kicks: Left | twii.tur: @herb_northrop | Club: FC Buckridge
Style of Play: Offensive | Speed: Medium-Fast | Physicality: Normal | Attitude: Professional
Herbert Northrop, one of many, many players from Hapilopper's infamous Sporting World Cup teams, is one of the most spiritual members of a Hapiloppian football team that has existed. A graduate of Southland Christian Academy in Buckridge, Northrop makes sure to say a prayer before he hits the pitch, and when he scores a goal, he drops to one knee and says a prayer to the Good Lord Above for allowing him to score a goal. You won't see Northrop pulling off cheap shots like Jerold Dickman, and you won't see him attempting to end someone's career (or life) like Nathan Ellis. That's not what he does. Instead, he tries to play as professionally as he can, as cleanly as he can, as effectively as he can. And his style is quite effective, leading the Hapiloppian League in midfielder goals last year with 12.
#10 - PETER ROBSON | Forward | Age: 22 | Kicks: Right | twii.tur: @PeteRobson | Club: FC Surrey
Style of Play: Creative | Speed: Fast | Physicality: Low | Attitude: Professional
Pete Robson, one of two forwards for Team Hapilopper, was second in goals last year with 36, leading FC Surrey to second place in the Hapiloppian League, a surprising statistic considering FC Surrey, or sports in Surrey at all for that matter, have been known for their success. In fact, the most noteworthy thing in sport in Surrey lately has been the backlash to a ballpark in the northern Surrey suburbs. Instead of thinking about all of the failures that have plagued sports in Surrey over the years, Pete Robson put his head down and did what he did best - score goals, and he scored a hell of a lot of them. Away from the field, Robson is a key member of a group in Surrey that calls themselves "The Asskickers," a group from Surrey Perimeter College that held some damned spectacular parties in the style of Fernie Fairburn's old parties at that school.
#11 - TOBY BRYSON | Forward | Age: 21 | Kicks: Left | twii.tur: @tobyb90 | Club: The Soldiers of Hapilopper City
Style of Play: Straightforward | Speed: Fast | Physicality: Low | Attitude: Relaxed
Imagine for a second sitting in Toby Bryson's shoes. You look in your locker and see your name above the number 11, the number that the great Ernie Stevenson wore for so many years for Hapilopper national teams, scoring so many goals, including all of those screamers in the Baptism of Fire. All of those shots in the World Cup Qualifiers. The "Hop Skip Holy Shit" goals. The bicycle kicks. But now Ernie is done playing international football, most likely playing one or two more seasons in Nephara and then he's going home to take care of his new twin children. The door has opened for Toby Bryson to take the showcase position on Team Hapilopper's roster, and he hopes to make the most of it. But imagine, just for a second, sitting in his shoes. He's the one that has replaced Ernie Stevenson. How stressful of a role must THAT be?
#12 - MORRIS JAMISON | Forward | Age: 21 | Kicks: Right | twii.tur: @jamisonmo | Club: Hap City Highway Patrol
Style of Play: Scrappy | Speed: Fast | Physicality: High | Attitude: Antisocial
Morris Jamison will have you believe that he should be the one in the Ernie Stevenson slot. He should be the one wearing the number 11. After all, he'll be the first to tell you he's scrapped for everything he's ever had. Barely making the team at Conrad Saylor High School, before impressing the coaches enough to make him the lead striker. Riding the bench on the SWC side, before amazing his teammates at the Highway Patrol enough to give him that much more time for the coaches to see him. He's worked for everything he's got and damn it, he's going to make damn sure that Thom Perkins makes him start a match or two. Students at Saylor High arriving by bus in the morning have seen the lights on in the stadium as the sun rises. They'll see Jamison, by himself, practicing pivot moves and long-distance shots on goal. And if that's the case, he's been there all night.
#13 - ELIAS MOON | Forward | Age: 21 | Kicks: Right | twii.tur: @eliasmoon | Club: The Soldiers of Hapilopper City
Style of Play: Creative | Speed: Medium | Physicality: Low | Attitude: Creative
On the other hand, Elias Moon is just happy to be here. Since barely making the SWC squad a few years ago, Moon has made a living on trying out as many trick shots on goal as he can. He wants to be just like Ernie Stevenson, although without the other parts of Ernie Stevenson. In other words, he's a trick-shot artist and that's it. His videos of trick shots have gone viral on social media, like, most recently, a goal scored from the back of a moving minivan circling around the pitch of Capital Stadium, a stunt that impressed both Hapiloppian fans and angered the Hapilopper National Baseball Team after it led to some damage to the artificial turf at the stadium. But while his goal scoring is on point, his fundamentals could use some work, and that's why he's riding the bench.
#20 - KERRY SPALDING | Midfielder | Age: 22 | Kicks: Right | twii.tur: @k-spalding | Club: Raceway FC
Style of Play: Offensive | Speed: Fast | Physicality: Rough | Attitude: Moron
Veteran observers will tell you that a Hapiloppian sports team, it just so seems, just has to have at least one idiot on it. They're a great ball player or race car driver, but they do stupid things. Chris Holmes put an iguana in Kai Qiang's car. Nolan Jefferson stole a bullpen cart and crashed it into a gas station. Kerry Spalding, meanwhile, missed half the season last year after a night of bowling at Sparky's Lanes, a popular bowling alley in Buckridge. While there, Spalding ran down a bowling lane like an idiot and attempted to shoot it from point blank range. Unfortunately, he slipped, fell and landed flat on his face, twisting both of his ankles and breaking his nose. What an idiot. There is a unfortunate belief, and this seems to support it, that Hapiloppian athletes can be the biggest dingbats in international sport.
#21 - PIERS ADCOCK | Midfielder | Age: 20 | Kicks: Right | twii.tur: (none) | Club: Peoria FC
Style of Play: Defensive | Speed: Medium | Physicality: Yeah, it's there alright | Attitude: Asshole
What is it about people named "Piers"? Piers Adcock, defensive midfielder for Team Hapilopper, is that kind of player you just want to punch out. Not because he's being stupid, but because it seems like he's so god damn full of himself. He has to look his absolute best, the world has to revolve around him - hell, before a training session leading up to the start of World Cup 89, Piers marched into the locker room and declared "the future of Hapiloppian football has just arrived, and that future is me!" He's lucky Nate Ellis didn't go over and pop him in the mouth. But the point was made. Piers has a very arrogant attitude, even more so for a backup player. When he does get playing time, he'll play as dirty as the rest of them, something that DID get him punched by midfielder Maverick King during a training session. We'll see how this attitude develops.
#22 - RUFUS HARTLEY | Midfielder | Age: 21 | Kicks: Left | twii.tur: @r-p-hartley | Club: Pinkerton City SC
Style of Play: Offensive | Speed: Fast | Physicality: He's named Rufus, what do you expect | Attitude: Brawler
Just so you know, Rufus Parnell Hartley is a nice guy. He'll be the first donating at church. He tips well at restaurants. He helps at the soup kitchen if needed. But on the field, he's one of those guys that will get into a brawl on the pitch if someone wrongs him. He'll drop a player with the kind of tackle that makes Nathan Ellis wish he had pulled that on Alexis Fotellis. But he'll also score goals if needed, scoring nine last year for Pinkerton. He'll be a dominating presence on the offensive side of the pitch, making other players bend to his will, by force if need be. Away from the pitch, Hartley's family owns dozens of Jane's Diner franchises all around the Pinkerton area, to the point where some have called Hartley "the heir to the all-night diner".
#23 - ORAL ROUNDTREE | Midfielder | Age: 21 | Kicks: Right | twii.tur: @roundtree25 | Club: United Hampton Cities
Style of Play: Hybrid | Speed: Medium | Physicality: Moderate | Attitude: Professional
So imagine going through life with the name "Oral." Poor Oral's parents had nine months and they came up with Oral. His classmates had a field day with that name. That was, until he started playing football. There's a story that goes around Michael Bell High in North Hampton about how a student in a physical education class had spent the entire day getting on Oral's case about his name, with all of THOSE jokes. Once they got onto the soccer pitch, that student stopped making those jokes. Oral had nutmegged him and made him look like a complete idiot. And that's what he does. He doesn't let the jokes bother him, he just gets the job done and turns the jokers into the jokes like he's always done. He scored five goals for UHC last year and those goals came in some real clutch times, helping the team to fourth place in the Hapiloppian League standings last year.
#24 - PARKER MATHIS | Midfielder | Age: 19 | Kicks: Left | twii.tur: @HAPFirstDude | Club: West River FC
Style of Play: Defensive | Speed: Fast | Physicality: Heavy | Attitude: Intense
The youngest member of Team Hapilopper could very well be its most controversial. Parker Mathis, you see, is the son of William Mathis, the President of Hapilopper. And oh boy, the claims of "nepotism" and "favoritism" rang out like nothing else. But those that cried the loudest were those that knew the least. While Mathis won't shy away from who his father is, he doesn't play like he was entitled to anything. He's a vicious player that could serve as either a defenseman or a midfielder, depending on where he's needed. And oh yeah, he'll get into card trouble, all right. Last year, surprisingly, in his rookie season, he led the Hapiloppian League in red cards with five, and also led the league in Presidential ass-thrashings, too. Rumor has it that William Mathis himself went down into the West River locker room after a couple of games and ripped his son a new one for playing like a complete douchebag. His teammates aren't talking.
#30 - FABIAN TRELOAR | Defenseman | Age: 21 | Kicks: Right | twii.tur: @treloar | Club: Pinkerton City SC
Style of Play: Zone Defense | Speed: Medium | Physicality: Not enough | Attitude: Friendly
So, just for one second, close your eyes and picture in your mind the first thing that comes through your mind when we say "Fabian Treloar." What did he look like? The kind of pretty male that appears on the front of those weird-ass romance novels they sell in supermarkets? That would be incorrect. This guy's got a dingy dark mullet, he's a little chubby, and he's far from the kind of person that ladies dream of. He reads comic books and streams video games. On the pitch, though, Fabian can stop an offensive from the middle, and when he does, he does it very efficently. He's not a cheap bastard about it, he's just efficent. If he gets a card, it's by total accident. Many suggest he has a bright future ahead, but it wouldn't hurt him to get a little more physical, a little dirtier, and quite frankly, there's no shame in getting a card or two. In Hapilopper, it's to be expected.
#31 - QUINTIN MONTAGUE | Defenseman | Age: 21 | Kicks: Right | twii.tur: @q-mont18 | Club: Garvinson Trojans
Style of Play: Man-To-Man | Speed: Fast | Physicality: Moderate | Attitude: Professional
Here's a reader. Quintin Montague is one of the biggest readers in Hapiloppian sport. He'll read anything. He'll read an offensive effort. He'll read the Garvinson Picayune. He'll read the lips of a fan in the 17th row. He'll read all the latest popular novels released in Hapilopper. He'll try to read a midfielder's mind as they're racing down the pitch. And he'll read the playbooks ad nauseam. That's a good attitude to have, and it's a good trait. But what Montague doesn't have is that killer instinct to be a regular starter, at least, not yet. He's been psyched out by opposing players a little too much for Team Hapilopper's liking. Members of the coaching staff are working on this, though. How they're working on it, well, watch this space. It might involve Nathan Ellis and some drill sergeant tactics, which sounds a little frightening on its face.
#32 - ASHLEY STANFORD | Defenseman | Age: 22 | Kicks: Right | twii.tur: @stanford-the-kicker | Club: Border City United
Style of Play: Zone Defense | Speed: Fast | Physicality: Oh Hell Yeah | Attitude: Ruthless
The second woman to make it to a Hapilopper national football team, Ashley Stanford is not here to look pretty, nor is she here to make friends with anyone. She's here to kick some ass, and with Border City United last year, she did exactly that, famously breaking the collarbone of UHC striker Shelley Linwood with a cheap shot clothesline as he was on his way to bring a goal into the back of the net. And she didn't give two shits. When asked after the game if she had any remorse for breaking his collarbone, her response was simple: "I'm not paid to think about that. He shouldn't have come up to goal. My job is to stop him." With that kind of attitude, it's wondered if she'll take the Nate Ellis role after he retires from play, whenever that is.
#33 - LEVI BATESON | Defenseman | Age: 20 | Kicks: Left | twii.tur: @levi_bateson | Club: West Hampton Sports Club
Style of Play: Man-To-Man | Speed: Medium | Physicality: Sufficient | Attitude: Relaxed
Known more for his prowess on the saxophone than his prowess on the pitch, Levi Bateson nevertheless gets by with his play for the West Hampton Sports Club, which, before you get any ideas, is more than enough to stop an offensive effort if need be. Some suggest that Bateson's style of play is a throwback to the pre-World Cup days, when Hapiloppian footballers would play a more relaxed style of football. That's not a compliment. It's removed from the hair-on-fire, balls-to-the-wall style of play that has developed since Hapilopper started playing international football. Either way, he's still good at it, good enough to make the national team. As for his saxophone prowess, it's magnificent. Bateson plays for a band that tours across the Hampton Cities, and his saxophone solos are among the most popular parts of their concerts.
#60 - KENNY SHELLEY | Goalkeeper | Age: 21 | Kicks: Right | twii.tur: (none) | Club: FC Surrey
Style of Play: Roving Keeper | Speed: Medium | Physicality: Low | Attitude: Excitable
Kenny Shelley will be the first to tell you that he's not expecting much in the way of playing time. He's a servicable keeper for FC Surrey, but good enough to get an assignment on the national team. He's averaged around 97 minutes per goal allowed, which is good, but not great. Many suggest that his best days are well ahead of him, as with most of the Hapiloppian team. Could he be another Cooter Harris? It's hard to say. At least he has the persona down pat. Shelley drives a 1986 Major pick-up truck, a truck he's had since high school. He's carried everything from lumber to dirt to his girlfriend in the back of that truck, and it's likely he loves that truck more than life itself.
#90 - DUKE STAMP | Goalkeeper | Age: 20 | Kicks: Left | twii.tur: @stamperHAP | Club: Kingsland Warriors
Style of Play: Traditional | Speed: Slow | Physicality: Low | Attitude: Moron
By now, you've seen the videos by now, or at least, we hope you've seen the videos. Duke Stamp decided one day to try out the concept of automotive buoyancy. So he drove his car as fast as he could into the pool of one of his teammates. The car went right in the pool and proved the theory that automotive buoyancy, for the most part, is total bullshit. Worse, it was a $65,000 Preston Super Skychief that he had just bought off the dealership floor, a car that had 25 miles on it. So Duke Stamp wound up ruining a brand new, very nice car just to try out this idiotic theory that cars can float. On the pitch, Stamp is an efficient goalkeeper, averaging 125 minutes per goal allowed, but he's relegated to keeper no. 3 because of his idiotic behavior.
TYPICAL LINEUP AND SUBS: