World Cup 73 - RPing Thread

by **Northern Sunrise Islands** » Mon Oct 19, 2015 3:24 pm

WORLD CUP 73
Kike and the Makeshifts smack Band of Brothers: USI 1-0 Kaboomlandia

The trip down memory lane saw Unified Sunrise Islands' reserves squeezing a win over Kaboomlandia's soldier squad. Certainly, a squad with players like Rolando or Allejo would tear their opponents, but Chiyo went with a more reserved strategy: one that saw the starter eleven consist of Endicott; Al-Yossei, Dramini, Biskara, Fábio Santos; Cosme, Boneless, von Kraus, Shizuka; Ana Carolina and Kike. Not a bad team at all, but certainly a good sign that the Sunrisians were not expecting to be challenged by the Europeians. And good lord, was that nearly their downfall. But thankfully, oversight from their opponents would eventually see a goal to the back of the net.

The first half was mostly a struggle. The 1-8-1 tactic certainly took its' toll: it was notoriously hard for the Sunrisians to get a good shot at the goal early, leaving their offense mostly to shots far and wide, barely enough to give McEachern trouble. On the other side of the spectrum, Dramini is still playing his best after the Sunrisian Championship's title win. Also part of this impressive defence was Waseem Biskara, a Northeastern Sunrisian currently defending Adjurgen; who made sure Rene Allard was neutered on the pitch.

Finally, however, the second half arrived and Kike, already fed up with their catch the flag style of play, did the least expected: he dribbled over Bradbury and Epone, before having no problem against Marco Ciliano, widely dodging him and scoring with a nice-placed shot. All left for both sides was wait the remaining twenty minutes, the additional time and that was all. Unified Sunrise 1; Kaboomlandia 0. Sunrisians now rest for their last match on the round: Zackalantis. Of Quidditch fame, of course.

SPECIAL FEATURE
Tough Game (to watch): Campionat de la Colònia - Divisiò B, Maraudet 1 - 1 Real Valein

It's no mystery that football is, by far, the biggest sport around. The World Cup sees giants and minnows scrape for a sacred spot that may or may not be something to hold on high regard after heavy discussion on what type of ball to use, why that one place figured out it'd be a great idea to just shoot people at random or why that one team assumed people wanted to see them as they were birthed. That, mostly, extends to national level as well, case of point being the Unified Sunrise Islands, home of the biggest football system around. Big clearly not meaning best as for the one eventual Selyne Athenians or Son Vasco or Matthew Rangers, there are at least twenty Ballinamult Town or Matalazcayán Monteros or Towering Butternut. They might be all fine and dandy as far as sympathy goes, there is certainly a lot of charm in travelling down the subway to leave the home of a big team like Mardi Lopunnies to see how the East Mardi Town is doing but these guys ain't doing much anywhere.

So, as I write this little text, you might be imagining how much I'm displeased about how my assignment of watching games that might be very, very poor in quality are "the best way to find upcoming talent". For you that aren't from the Sunrise, tip of the century here: if it's not from USICA, Youth League, Street League or from a team that is renowned for raising players on its' own, like Kike's old team URT; it's probably not going to be worth your time. And don't pretend like this is me being mean with a bunch of toddlers just due to myself having to take a trip from Esportiva to Futurnia just so I could reach the somewhat populated town of Maraudet for this little encounter, because not only it was a nice plane ride from Mardi to Sant Jordi, this small town is actually very nice to journalists. And besides, considering there was literally only one player that I should legitimately care about as he happened to be a loaned goalkeeper from Sant Jordi CF, the rest of the teams were mostly poor, pre-reagement and post as well. At first, I thought this was the preliminary match before the encounter but this wasn't the case at all. Turns out their preliminary was a match between what would be their youth sides... which so happen to be a bunch of children against another bunch of children that wouldn't feel out of place from Class Silver of the Hatcher League (hopefully, that's not where I'll have to cover next).

Now, as I arrived at the town's inter-municipal bus station, Maraudet's president happened to be waiting for me. I got to be honest, Mr. Joan Sabreu looks like a drunkard. Either that or some people speak their English by simply sprouting words with random tone while sliding slightly to one side... and I'm pretty sure Sant Jordi doesn't work like that. From what I could understand, Maraudet was trying to be a fine example of "small town football". Saying that seems like a pretty standard thing, if Maraudet wasn't currently sitting in the middle of the Second Division of Sant Jordi's "State" Championship, known as the Campionat de la Colònia, pretty much their major point in the season as while the big (or just solid) teams play at the Sunrisian system, teams like Maraudet try their best at small, separate and somewhat respected... State Championships. Go figure.

   CAMPIONAT DE LA COLÒNIA - DIVISIÒ B  Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts
01 Villasol                              15   10   5   0    26    9  +17    35
02 Conquestra Atlético                   15   10   2   3    27   15  +12    32
03 Les Saints                            15    8   4   3    18   14   +4    28
(...)
08 Real Valein                           15    5   4   6    17   22   −5    19
09 Balloria                              15    4   6   5    10   11   −1    18
10 Jers                                  15    4   6   5    20   23   −3    18
11 Maraudet                              15    4   6   5    15   20   −5    18
12 Jabalaera                             15    3   8   4    15   16   −1    17
(...)
18 Daler                                 15    1   7   7    17   28  −11    10

He'd also go on to say that, while the team was on the eleventh place, it was all going to change as soon as their squad got a win over their opponents on the day, a "Real something". The opponents Maraudet were to face are popularly known as Real Valein. That team has slightly more history over their opponents, but that's just a small inch of advantage. Real Valein was one of the last teams to come under the Monarchist banner, from the days that both Sant Jordi and Son Vasco answered to the same flag. When Sant Jordi got independence as Catalaterra, Real Valein was allowed to stay put, but they ended up falling from the major league at the time, just like Maraudet did, but unlike the home team it didn't have to do with money. Real just had a very terrible squad and no interest in spending money as their previous owner didn't have much ambition. The new one doesn't have it either, but the team did get somewhat better. Hell, before match, the Royal Greens had a two-win streak and could, maybe, figure on the Divisiò A soon enough.

Game time as I finally got to seat at the white-and-black seats crowd. Not the Union Stadium, it was... there were, maybe, 4500 seats. And that's being nice with this stadium. Both teams stood on the pitch, positioned for the Northern Sunrisian anthem and the Sant Jordian anthem. It did have the nice touch of having an orchestra, but that still doesn't excuse the completely bored look of both squads. Sure, there was some respect about the anthems, but it still felt like they'd rather be sleeping by now.

MARAUDET - Basilio; Tian, Michel Luz, Partí; Luca, Gianata (C), Elena, Martí Guna, Martí Alazar; Juno, Yan
REAL VALEIN - Vespa; Juanlu, Matias, Azevedo, Caballero (c); Martína, Elís Rojas, Paredes, Cuadrado; Rivalua, Marchestre

First half was... eh, nothing to really talk about. Now while I agree that some of these players might have some potential if they actually consider moving to bigger teams. Tian wasn't a terrible player, she was simply being the ferocious half-Sunricean under a coach that doesn't know how to play one. Caballero was playing well his role as a captain, though as a right-back he left a good bunch to desire. I also enjoyed Rivalua's first half. I like a good striker that can also be somewhat of an eye candy and that's mostly what she did. Though at some points it seemed she was trying to steal my soul by staring very empty at me all of a sudden, but still, could be a good talent. Everyone else was decent or just boring, but just kicking the ball around isn't going to be entertaining at any rate.

I'd love to say the second half would be responsible for turning this match upside-down, but that's not the case. Rivalua would finally score after finally giving a hard shot for Basilio, who failed to block after clearly not jumping far enough. It wouldn't take long for Maraudet to pay back with a good strike by Juno, catching Vespa on a blind spot but that was pretty much it. The game returned to its' dull state and that was it. See, these teams have potential, but that's something nearly everyone does. But aside from being the eventual kind-hearted squadron to an eventual big side if they ever have the chance of playing Sant Jordi, that's about it.

Though for a place with so little quality on football, they do have a fantastic bar near the stadium. No wonders the president of Maraudet CE is always drunk.

by **Gregoryisgodistan** » Mon Oct 19, 2015 4:16 pm

Lord Almighty Gregory's Speech to the People

"Good evening, ladies, gentlemen, and slaves. Earlier today, our beloved Foot Slaves played to an embarrassing draw with Jeruselem. We have now only won one of four games this tournament. It is humiliating, horrendous, and inappropriate. Shameful as well. Therefore, I am issuing an ultimatum to the Foot Slaves and their coaching staff - finish at least third in Group 16, or every last one of you will be executed with the Brownie Cutter of Death along with your families for the crime of shaming the nation. The Brownie Cutter of Death is very painful, so don't make us use it. You don't want us to. It will slowly slice you into hundreds of pieces, slicing through bone, organ, and everything. And best of all, the executions will be televised live on National TV and everyone must watch them to learn what we do to those to shame the nation.

"But you still have hope. If you finish in third place or better, you will live. I believe in you just like you believe in me. You will finish third or better unless you are heathen traitors. But perhaps you are heathen traitors. In that case, bring on the Brownie Cutter of Death! But I still hold out hope in you. We're going to have a strong last two games of the first half against no-names, a strong second half, and we're going to WIN THIS CUP! But you have to play like winners first. So go out there and WIN THIS CUP!

"By the way, this is the Group of Heathens, and I hope you're not heathens too. I hope you will allow me to guide you on the right path to victory. But if you reject my guidance, you accept death. And death shall come to you in that event, via the Brownie Cutter of Death. I will now demonstrate the Brownie Cutter of death for the folks at home by executing this slave. He's a slave so he's not important. See, watch me slowly slice through his bone and organs as blood comes gushing out and he howls in pain, begging for death, but death will come slowly and painfully to him. But he is a slave, so who cares? Well, that could be you falling victim to the Brownie Cutter of Death if you don't finish at least third in your group. So go out there and finish third or better in Group 16. Preferably Top 2, and then Qualify for the World Cup. But I'll take third at this point if necessary. But not fourth or lower, unless you want to DIE! DIE DIE DIE! I am the Lord. How dare you disrespect me by losing or drawing to heathens? You shall pay for this if it continues. You shall pay with your lives. Because that is the fate which befalls those who shame the nation. I am the One True Lord. Obey me or you will pay. Finish third or better or you will die by the Brownie Cutter of Death. Those are my orders - get on it now or else!

"Good night, to all, even those foolish soccer players who can't win!

by **Armeia** » Mon Oct 19, 2015 4:23 pm

The Isa Tangemen Chronicles Part Two: Anger
TL;DR of last part: Isa allowed some goals that she shouldn't have in the Armeian loss to Omerica, and she begins to question whether she's grown up enough to return to Armeia, specifically Southeastern.

"Did you hear the news? About Kat?" asked Bianka Schraeder, after training. Armeia was holding camp in Sudens City before the next qualifying match, deciding which tactical changes to make before the next game. Isa ignored the question, sitting down on the bench and adjusting her boots, which were red and white, in the colors of Southeastern. Finally, she looked up and spoke. "Did I hear about it? Yeah. Do I care? Not a chance."

Bianka was kind of surprised, she looked like she was going to make a remark, but she stayed silent for a couple seconds. "Really? She tried to off herself, Isa... How can you not care if she lives or dies?"

"Did she care about me when I was at Southeastern? What about how she abandoned me? Left me all alone when I needed her the most? Do you really think I give two shits about what happens to her after that?" Isa asked, getting up and pushing past Bianka. "You're wrong, Bia."

Bianka sighed and followed Isa, knowing how stubborn she could be at times. Maybe it was better to leave her alone. But then again, they had fought a lot over the past month, and it didn't help to not talk when that happened. No, it only made things worse. "Isa, wait! I wasn't trying to upset you-" started Bianka, but Isa cut her off, whirling around to face her and putting her hands on her shoulders.

"Then why the hell did you bring her up? It's not enough that me and her have to be teammates, you expect me to feel sympathy for her, too? Why wouldn't I be upset?" Isa replied, her temper and her voice raising. "Why wouldn't I be mad after that?"

Before Bianka could reply, she stormed off, obviously set off by what Bianka had said. In this past week, talking to Isa was like navigating a minefield. One wrong word and she would get like this, her temper exploding. Bianka hated that side of her, how unpredictable she was. But, like with everything, you had to take the good with the bad when it came to love. Bianka just hoped that there would be more good than bad in the coming weeks, as more and more pressure was put on Isa's shoulders to succeed.

Ezra Blaha did a double take when he saw the person who just walked into the tattoo shop that he worked at. She wore a hoodie with the sleeves cut off, and the tattoo on her neck that read "CARA", and the short black hair, confirmed to Ezra that it indeed was Isa Tangemen. The two went back awhile, with Ezra being a journalist/blogger for Strikerless and also a tattoo artist, the artist who had done the elaborate sleeve tattoos on her arms. "Hey, I didn't expect to see you here," Ezra said, moving to greet her.

"We're holding camp in Sudens City, so I thought I'd stop by," Isa shrugged. "I'm in need of a new tattoo actually. I want it on my right wrist, do you have any southern cross designs?"

Ezra walked to a counter and picked up a book, flipping through the designs. "Yep, does this look good?" he asked, showing her a simple blue southern cross design.

Isa nodded. "That's perfect," she said before sitting down in the chair and pointing to the spot where she wanted it. "I need it here, somewhere where I'll see it a lot."

The tattoo in itself was simple, but being a regional symbol of Sudens City, it made her think even more about going home. That was why she got it, to remind herself of home and to make sure she remembered where she came from, even if she went to another team. As she was leaving the tattoo shop, and thinking more about returning to Southeastern, she sent out the tweet that made every Southeastern fan collectively lose their minds.

She was tweeting to Southern Ultras 99, the main supporters group of Southeastern, who were always complaining about how Mia Rojo, the Southeastern goalkeeper, had taken such a large contract and cost the team resources to improve in other areas. Of course, if Isa's tweet was honest, that wouldn't be much of a problem this season. The night that Isa posted that tweet, her friend and former national team teammate Pandora Reimfeller DMed her asking about transferring.

Of course, the conversation ended on a cryptic note. Trying to get Pandora to open up about her problems was like talking to a brick wall, it was near impossible and it was always frustrating. As Isa climbed into bed, the one thing on her mind was returning to Sudens City, not with the national team but with Southeastern. Yes, tomorrow morning she would ask her agent to start trying to get Brandon Tjaeder's side interested, and hopefully she would figure out how to get released from her contract abroad.

by **Farfadillis** » Mon Oct 19, 2015 5:05 pm

Part 1
Part 2

"Ichi, you have a visitor." Announced the nurse, with a small hint of a smile. The team had already visited me the previous day. They let me hold the cup a bit and all. Not sure just how legal that was, to be honest. I don't think any one of them really got along with me well enough to pay me another visit. Other than Friekder, of course, who was naturally the visitor. I knew that even before he stepped in.

As he did, he asked the obvious question.

"So, what did the doctor say?"

"He said I might walk again. Nothing's clear yet. A few tests are pending, and the national holiday was extended for the people in charge of that. So I'll be stuck waiting for news for a while."

"Hmm... yeah, as I told you yesterday: sucks to be you."

I half-laughed at his cheekiness. "Well, yeah, not all of us can score a late winner in a final." I paused. "Great way to retire from the team, by the way. I think mine was a tad more dramatic, though." He laughed at that. Humor was a nice way to tackle the issue. No way being all serious about it would help me mentally.

"Glad to know can have a good laugh about this whole thing." He seemed to ponder for an instant, then switched to a far more serious tone. "Say, Ichi, have you thought about what you're gonna do after you recover?"

"Well, first of all, I'm gonna celebrate." He remained serious. "But, uh. no, I haven't. Football's obviously out of the question." I stopped to think for a bit. "I'm all out of ideas, really. Football's been everything for me until now."

"Then think of something. Football's not out of the question, though. Just playing it."

"Ichi Tuzzio manager of the Farfadillis national team. I like the sound of that."

"Wow, I definitely don't." He chuckled a bit. "Glad I retired before it came to that."

"Yeah, you were lucky. Hopefully, the youngsters weren't..."

"You were always very intelligent on the pitch. Maybe you can finally translate that to your off-the-pitch life."

"It's all a bunch of ifs and hopes, though. I've still got to focus on my recovery."

"Yeah, I get you, but life continues after that, and planning never hurts."

"True, I suppose."

He put his hands together. "Anyway, got to leave. Flight's leaving soon. I was just hoping to pay you a bit of a flash visit. Good luck with... well, you know, your legs."

"Good luck with yours too. Hopefully they can run a little faster this year."

by **Krytenia** » Mon Oct 19, 2015 5:46 pm

OOC: Officially the furthest I've had to reach for a headline pun.

Just Keep Jason Dave (Mint)
by Trevor O'Carroll in Secklow

SOMETIMES, it's just a case of removing the bad apple from the bunch. On this performance, Joel Scott's international career is as good as over after replacement cenre-back Jason Davis put in the shift of his life at home to Alastonia. True, it wasn't the most taxing of opposing sides, but then, neither were Keyne Island, and just look at what happened there. Davis was an absolute rock despite his relative youth, and alongside Alfie Xouse injected some pace and exuberance at the back. It aided the midfield in creating chances, too, as the Aces ran out comfortable four-one victors for what, surprisingly, is their first victory of the campaign.

Two goals in each half told the story of the game: in the first, Ronnie van Rijn took advantage of some slack defending to intercept a poor pass, find space to run into the box, and beat the keeper. The second, just before half-time, was vintage Krytenia, with a slick passing move finished by teenager Armando Ortega with a crisp shot from the edge of the area. The second half saw more of the same, with Valrauncion pouncing on an inch-perfect Ortega pass to slot home, before a corner just after the hour allowed the tall figure of Davis to nod home at the far post to complete a perfect day at the office. A late consolation was more due to a general lapse in concentration rather than individual failings, but such things can be forgiven when you're well in front and cruising.

A sterner test awaits, as Krytenia make the short trip north for their next game away to group leaders Mertagne. Both teams, of course, will be out to win; both, too, will have one eye on the result between surprise package Sameba and surprise strugglers Schottia. Group Six could be about to get very interesting.

KRYTENIA - 4
van Rijn 18
Ortega 44
Valrauncion 51
J Davis 62

ALASTONIA - 1
Porjoryk 87

by **Nova Anglicana** » Mon Oct 19, 2015 6:41 pm

Provincial Election Polls Are In, Left Controls 4 of 6

John McAvoy, Political Columnist, Londinium Courier

Newfoundland and Labrador

Party                Constituencies           PR        Total              +/-          Vote %
Progressive Justice               8           12           20               -2           40.02
People's                          9            8           17               -1           32.11
Stewardship                       3            2            5               +1            9.00
Liberal Secularist                2            2            4               +0            7.86
National                          2            1            3               +3            4.59
Libertarian                       1            0            1               -1            2.56
Independence                      0            0            0               +0            1.23
Socialist Workers'                0            0            0               +0            0.98
Equality                          0            0            0               +0            0.95
Democracy                         0            0            0               +0            0.55
Dominonist                        0            0            0               +0            0.15

Nova Scotia

Party                Constituencies           PR        Total              +/-          Vote %
Progressive Justice              10           10           20               -5           38.44
People's                          9           10           19               +3           37.21
Stewardship                       1            2            3               +0            6.45
Liberal Secularist                1            2            3               -1            6.21
National                          1            2            3               +3            6.03
Libertarian                       1            1            2               +0            3.88
Socialist Workers'                0            0            0               +0            0.68
Equality                          0            0            0               +0            0.60
Democracy                         0            0            0               +0            0.30
Dominonist                        0            0            0               +0            0.20

New Brunswick

Party                Constituencies           PR        Total              +/-          Vote %
People's                         10           11           21               -1           40.34
Progressive Justice              10            8           18               -3           34.46
National                          2            4            6               +6           11.28
Stewardship                       0            2            2               +0            4.26
Liberal Secularist                0            2            2               -1            4.02
Libertarian                       1            0            1               -1            2.84
Socialist Workers'                0            0            0               +0            0.80
Equality                          0            0            0               +0            0.79
Democracy                         0            0            0               +0            0.66
Dominonist                        0            0            0               +0            0.55

Prince Edward Island

Party                Constituencies           PR        Total              +/-          Vote %
Progressive Justice              10           12           22               +0           42.24
People's                          8            8           16               +0           30.41
Stewardship                       3            5            8               +1           15.61
Liberal Secularist                1            1            2               -1            4.66
National                          1            0            1               +1            2.64
Libertarian                       1            0            1               -1            2.45
Socialist Workers'                0            0            0               +0            0.73
Equality                          0            0            0               +0            0.61
Democracy                         0            0            0               +0            0.45
Dominonist                        0            0            0               +0            0.20

Quebec

Party                Constituencies           PR        Total              +/-          Vote %
People's                         12            9           21               +0           40.45
Progressive Justice               8            6           14               +1           28.12
Libertarian                       4            7           11               +1            21.21
Liberal Secularist                1            2            3               -1            5.74
Stewardship                       0            1            1               -1            2.69
Socialist Workers'                0            0            0               +0            0.67
Equality                          0            0            0               +0            0.55
Democracy                         0            0            0               +0            0.54
Dominonist                        0            0            0               +0            0.03

N.A.A.Z.E.

Party                Constituencies           PR        Total              +/-          Vote %
Progressive Justice               8            9           17               -1           35.08
People's                          8            6           14               -1           27.84
Liberal Secularist                4            4            8               -1           15.43
Stewardship                       3            2            5               +0            9.61
Libertarian                       2            1            3               +0            5.40
Socialist Workers'                0            1            1               +1            2.45
Equality                          0            1            1               +1            2.15
Democracy                         0            1            1               +1            2.01
Dominonist                        0            0            0               +0            0.03

Although most of the excitement in the campaign season was on King Voss' new National Party and the direction the People's Party would go in under new leader Michael Ramsey, it seems that their organizational skills leave something to be desired. The collective parties of the left will capture four of the six provincial Houses of Deputies. While this does represent a gain for the right (previously it was 5/1 for the left), the impact was expected to be somewhat greater. Especially disappointing is the performance of the National Party.

While the National Party polled at nearly 8% nationally and won seven seats in the House of Deputies, they are faring much more poorly in the provincial parliaments. They aren't even on the ballot in the NAAZE or Quebec, where the voters won't have any of their nationalistic guff, and apparently can only manage seven total seats outside of New Brunswick. In NB, they took advantage of a disgruntled populace and a bit of an economic downturn to seize six seats. With the People's Party winning twenty-one seats, it looks like there will be a PP-National alliance and that New Brunswick is about to get a lot more hostile to immigrants in the near future. This was previously a very divided parliament, 26 for the left to 24 for the right, but the right have reversed that and can plot their own course.

In the other Houses of Deputies, not much changes. The People's Party and the Libertarians continue to run the show in Quebec, winning 32 of 50 seats. The PP in Quebec have always adopted a more moderate conservatism, focusing on economics rather than the culture wars, and it seems to have rewarded them. There was no National Party to force them to change their strategy, and they crushed the PJP, who only won three more seats than the Libertarians. The Liberal Secularists lost a seat, as did the Stewardship Party. The environmentalists are beleaguered in a province where oil is a prime source of revenue, and the Secularists' somewhat anti-clerical rhetoric failed to find a foothold.

In Prince Edward Island, the PJP-SP alliance add one seat to their total, for a now-dominating total of 30 of 50 seats. There are two Secularist Deputies, but they aren't necessary for the left to institute their agenda. PEI is the center of green politics in Nova Anglicana, and the people like to keep their island pristine and natural. The rest of Nova Anglicana has urbanized and grown pretty quickly, but PEI has steadfastly resisted high-rise apartments and the like. It will be more of the same for the second-smallest province.

In Nova Scotia, Tim McKenzie's popularity meant that the PJP/SP alliance always held solid majorities during his nine years as First Minister, but his coattails apparently aren't that long when he's running for national office. The PJP remain the largest party with 20 seats, but they lose five seats from the previous election, and the PP moves up three seats to 19 Deputies. The Secularists and the Stewards' six combined seats mean the left holds this province, but it's not by much. Three for the Nationals and two for the Libertarians here, and the Secularists will hold the balance of power. Expect a lot of money to be poured into the province next election cycle.

The big changes come in the NAAZE, where three minor parties (Socialist Workers', Equality, and Democracy) each are predicted to win a PR seat. This is partially due to the NAAZE's unique voting policy; legal permanent residents can vote in provincial elections. This group makes up nearly 40% of the population of the NAAZE and swing a little more to the left than other groups. The left dominated this election, winning 33 of 50 seats, but the PJP only won 17 and will be forced to maneuver as part of a broad coalition. The PJP-SP alliance holds 22 seats, so they're going to need the Secularists' support to govern. The question is whether the SWP, Equality, and Democracy will hitch themselves to the Secularists' bandwagon and try to get in government. For Equality and Democracy, this could be a boost towards achieving their objectives, but the SWP doesn't want to associate itself with capitalists, and so will probably remain aloof.

In Newfoundland and Labrador, the combination of PJP support in Newfoundland and Stewardship support among First Nations people in Labrador nets them 25 seats to the collective right's 21 seats. The Nationals were hoping for a larger swing in their direction among the working class but, for better or for worse, they stuck with the PJP. The Newfoundland Independence Party got 1.23%, their highest percentage in several years, but no seats and will continue their quixotic campaign next cycle.

All in all, the results pretty well reflect the national election; the PJP and the PP remain the two largest parties, but the minor parties are seeing some more success than they have in the past. It remains to be seen what course they will all embark on, but these are the governments we've got for the next three years.

by **Chiata** » Mon Oct 19, 2015 6:49 pm

Chiata Times
Rough Start

We thought it was a bad thing to have a first matchday BYE, but we didn't realize how terrible a start Chiata would have. It is always tough playing a hard team in the first game of qualifying, and it happened that Chiata would have to play Audioslavia. Even though the Suns were at home, they didn't stand a chance. Audioslavia dominated the pitch, albeit they play at Chiata's tempo. The Bulls scored in the 39th minute, after a long first half of tense play. Chiata could not get a score through the second half, so Audioslavia won with ease. After that expected result, the Suns travelled to Nassau-Hessen. Chiata was still out of rhythm and the attack came up with nothing. Nothing! Nothing against the fourth seed! Luckily, the Suns displayed their solid Chiatan defense that also kept Nassau scoreless. Chiata would finally score their first goal in Matchday Four. It is nothing to celebrate about, they played Nua-ta, an unranked side. Davis scored the goal, assist from Eastep, but it would be the only one. At home, Chiata only won 1-0 against an unranked nation. We are in dire straights for sure.

As if to add insult to injury, we came across another media post that predicts Chiata doing poorly. Does everyone hate Chiata? This time, San Llere would be the nation where the media came from. They were running a Player Bracket, where the best players from each nation were compared and a winner picked. In usual bracket style, the winner would progress to the next round. Now, we don't know what source the article was using, but they said Left Back David Webb was Chiata's best player. Chiata's opponent, Sameba, were given midfielder named Huela. Long story short, the article uses typical offensive bias and picked the midfielder. By far, goalkeeper Mack Truex is Chiata's best player. In the World Cup 71 Cycle, he only allowed five goals over 14 qualifying games. Then, in the resulting Cup of Harmony, Truex only allowed two goals, and Chiata went to the Quarter Finals. If that wasn't enough, this cycle Truex has only allowed a single goal after four matchdays and three games. As usual, it seems most nations care little for defense or goalkeepers and automatically chose the forward or midfielder.

by **Ceni** » Mon Oct 19, 2015 7:18 pm

TORREMOR: Good evening, candidates and viewers. I’m Lara Torremor from the Coben Jerfel Auditorium at the University of Ceni and Cenial. You’re watching the first of three debates of the Cenian presidential election 2248 on domestic policy. For your review, from left to right the candidates are as follows: Masnol Binnill of the Democratic Socialist Party, Obiid Valtan of the Cenian Social Liberal Party, Sevisa Aralen of the Green Party, Kara Thirmen of the Cenian Conservative Union, and Allan Debord of the Alliance for Cenian Future. We now turn to the topic of health care. The candidates have drawn lots and Mr. Binnill will speak first, followed by Ms. Thirmen, Ms. Aralen, Mr. Debord, and Mr. Valtan. Mr. Binnill, your remarks?

BINNILL: Imagine this: a twenty-five hundred percent increase on everything. Exorbitant emergency room prices. Gauze that costs twenty-five pence at the convenience store ending up costing a hundred and fifty bewlegi. Extreme markups from everything from anesthesia to MRI’s. Extra medical procedures with no medical value whatsoever. All of this is motivated by hospitals’ desire not to serve the public, but to make a profit. I disagree with this callous approach to health care. Instead, I support socialized healthcare that provides equal care to all, regardless of the ability to pay, so that all of Ceni is healthy. To achieve this, I support nationalization of all hospitals in Ceni, so that the government makes sure that the hospitals’ main concern is the people. Any profits recorded by the hospitals would go to the employees – in the form of salaries commensurate with ability and experience – and the people in the form of a social dividend. Hospitals should be able to compete with each other based on quality of care, but they should not be able to gouge their customers to the bone, literally adding insult to energy. I also support practical measures to improve the problem of obesity: a small, five-pence tax on sugary drinks, subsidies to low-income families for fruits, vegetables, and healthy food, and measures to reduce the cost of these same healthy foods as well as to reduce the number of food deserts. Health should be for all, not just the rich.

TORREMOR: Thank you, Mr. Binnill. Ms. Thirmen?

THIRMEN: I must disagree with some of Mr. Binnill’s proposals. A nationalization of our health care system would indubitably increase the cost of health care, not decrease it, by adding to costs in additional bureaucracy. That’s why I support a privatization of some of our healthcare systems already owned by the state. Hospitals should be run like a business – to provide a service to consumers as well as to make a profit. However, I do support at least a limited form of government involvement in health care. We already have a system of health care, called Cenicare, that pays for the majority of health care for low-income and some for middle-class families. We should spend less money on Cenicare, make it more efficient, and reduce fraud in this system, but we should keep Cenicare. Fraud reduction would be a major goal in health care policy under my administration. Fraud costs millions of bewlegi each and every year and reduces the quality of care for the average citizen. I will establish a special task force to audit Cenicare records and identify potential fraudsters, and impose strict penalties and vigorous prosecution for offenders against the Cenicare system. But I think that we should keep Cenicare, just reform it and make it more efficient so it can better serve the people and make better health care for less cost.

TORREMOR: Thank you, Ms. Thirmen. Ms. Aralen?

ARALEN: I think our health care system is in need of major reform. Our country focuses too much on profit and not enough on individual people. But what I think our country needs to focus on is women’s healthcare, more specifically family planning, contraception, and abortion. I think those areas are underrepresented in today’s debate. While I know that Mr. Debord after me will denounce abortion as a sin, I know that men in suits and ties sitting in the capital cannot decide the reproductive health of women today, facing many problems. Our government needs to focus on providing services to poor and underserved women who need education regarding the best way to have contraceptives and such. So we definitely to expand our options on the front of women’s health care. I also think we need to focus on expanding our services to poor and underserved people throughout the country. I know a lot of people who cannot afford to go to see the doctor, they are getting sick or have injuries but they do not go to see a doctor because they know they cannot afford it. They know they must choose between putting food on the table and going to see the doctor. That human option means that we need to expand our coverage for low-income people and make it more affordable for people to get healthier quicker. So, in short, my health care plan would focus on women’s health and the health of more low-income people.

TORREMOR: Thank you, Ms. Aralen. Mr. Debord?

DEBORD: I have said on multiple occasions in the past what my opinion on this issue has been and it has not changed. Our God has given us punishment four our sins by giving us diseases and sicknesses, he has made it our punishment for avoiding His will. God will reward those who believe in Him with absolution from their sins, and God will punish those who do not. So, therefore, this country has no need for a state health care system. Our health care system is, in a sense, rewarding those who have committed sin. Therefore, I propose a solution to make sure that those who follow God are treated and those who do not are not treated at all. Firstly, I will dismantle Ceni’s official state health care system and Cenicare. Secondly, I will convert these hospitals and clinics to religiously owned hospitals that have the right to deny treatment based on religion. These hospitals will also be banned from giving abortions, which of course under my administration will be banned outright. Abortions are one of the most devastating sins in this world. No person has any right whatsoever to take any unborn life. Those unborn children must have the rights of anyone else. Therefore any person who performs or seeks an abortion will be arrested and sentenced to die by execution. This plan will make sure that the nation of Ceni will follow God’s will finally.

TORREMOR: Thank you, Mr. Debord. Mr. Valtan?

VALTAN: I agree with what a lot of candidates have said on this stage here: our health system here today is too much focused on profit, and not enough focused on people, and I agree that we need to reform our health care system. My administration, of course, will affirm the right of people to have quality, efficient, and affordable health care. But my administration will focus on a practical solution to this problem, not some far-fetched, expensive proposal. My proposal is clinics: small emergency clinics would help to alleviate the burden on hospitals, deal with minor injuries and routine visits, and take a lot of the pressure off our doctors. The clinics would serve as feeders into the hospital system: doctors in clinics diagnose, doctors in the hospitals perform a lot of surgery. My clinic proposal will help for various reasons: as already mentioned, it will alleviate the burden on hospitals; it will help to increase customer service; it will help to increase response times at hospitals and the quality of care. So I think the clinic system will help to increase the quality and efficiency of our health care system. I also think that our hospitals and health care systems should not be focused on profit, but on people, and that out health care system is broken. But we can fix our health care system but reigning in costs and cutting down on unnecessary costs and procedures. Our health care system doesn’t have to be this way. Our health care system can be better, and I will make our health care system better.

TORREMOR: Thank you, Mr. Valtan. Unfortunately, that brings us to the end of our allocated time for statements for candidates. Now we will move on to questions for the candidates. This first question is for Mr. Debord: what do you say to critics of your health care plan that say it will hurt common people?

DEBORD: My plan does not harm the average person. In fact, it helps the average person by helping them to become stronger in the face of adversity as they deal with sickness. Also, it will help the average person become closer to God and help them to atone for their many sins that they have committed. Health care ought to be a privilege for those who serve God.

ARALEN: What you fail to recognize, Mr. Debord, is that your plan will hurt everyone in Ceni. You have no right to keep on dictating that supporters of your religion will receive favorable treatment while non-supporters will be punished. This is a country where everyone has the right to practice their own religion, and your plan absolutely infringes on that. We cannot live in a country with you as President.

DEBORD: That’s absolutely rubbish. The True Church guarantees life, liberty, and happiness to everyone who follows it, and my health care plan will encourage that ideal. My plan does a lot to help everyone, and it will also help the people of Ceni clear their sins when it comes to abortion, which is mass murder. Abortion cannot be allowed to continue in Ceni. Furthermore, I believe that health care should be a privilege, not a right.

ARALEN: Mr. Debord, your health care plan is mass murder.

VALTAN: Mr. Debord, you have no right to be the only person making health care decisions for our women and families in this world. Mr. Debord, you cannot be the only person who is the king of our nation. Our nation is not ruled by kings, our nation is not ruled by the True Church, and our nation will never be governed by someone with such obvious disregard for the rights of families to have health care, for the rights of mothers to raise their children healthy and well-fed.

TORREMOR: Moving on from that point, I have a point for Mr. Binnill: how will you respond to accusations that your health care plan is too expensive?

BINNILL: I will offer this: my health care plan will not increase costs for the individual citizen. That’s because, under my plan, state-run hospitals will not have incentives to jack up their prices significantly, making their prices more in line with the actual costs of the procedure. As for expenses on the government, I think my plan will actually be less expensive because now we’re going to be a lot more efficient.

THIRMEN: I disagree. Your plan is going to create a lot of extra bureaucracy, and your plan is only going to increase the number of medical malpractice lawsuits because the amount of procedures is going to go down. So your plan will actually disadvantage consumers, not make them better.

VALTAN: Our health care system, unfortunately, is old and decrepit and in need of repair. And those repairs will cost money. But I believe that that money is money well spent, as it will allow us to both save money in the future and allow an increasing standard of care for all of our population.

TORREMOR: I have a question for Ms. Thirmen. How would you propose to fix the health care system?

THIRMEN: As I mentioned in my response, I will privatize a lot of the health care system and make the insurance network private rather than public. I will also cut down on unnecessary bureaucracy and decrease the fraud in our health care system. That way, the decreased costs will be passed down to consumers.

ARALEN: What your plan leaves out is that companies are greedy, corporations are greedy. They only have their own best interests in mind, not the interests of the common person. These companies and private interests only look out for profit, not health of consumers, and they’re only interested in gouging out the most money possible, not actually caring for people.

VALTAN: If I may add something, I think that my clinic plan will go a long way to satisfying a lot of objections to both of these plans on my left and on my right: it will both allow care to everyone at an affordable price while still not breaking the bank.

TORREMOR: Our last question for this segment of the debate. Ms. Aralen, why does your health care plan focus on the issue of women’s health?

ARALEN: Women’s health is very important for me, for starters, because I’m a woman. While I had access to contraceptives in my earlier years because I was part of a wealthier family, I know a lot of poorer, working-class women don’t have that opportunity. I want to expand that opportunity to them and let them have the opportunity to control their lives and their health.

DEBORD: Your plan is sinful. God’s will dictates that women have as many children as possible.

ARALEN: You are sexist, Mr. Debord. Your church does not rule over women, and I will never let your church rule over me or impact women’s health, and I promise that I will fight for women’s health and women’s rights for as long as I live.

TORREMOR: Unfortunately, that’s all the time we have for now. Let’s move on to the topic of social policy…

by **Valladares** » Mon Oct 19, 2015 7:23 pm

Valladares and Río Oscuro inaugurate Floriana Dam with lavish ceremony amid protests in Floriana.

FLORIANA, RÍO OSCURO (VAP) — After a long wait, Valladar Kings Marcus and Cyrus along with Oscureño President Nataly Ossa have inaugurated Floriana Dam this Monday to great fanfare and celebration. The ceremonies were led by the Valladar and Oscureño Heads of State along with representatives from Quebecois company Maetjib, who built the project. This structure, located on the Florián River 25 kilometres north of the city of Floriana, capital of Río Oscuro, will provide the Terranean nation with electricity and drinking water, with plans for it to start exporting power to the City of Junín in the long-term. The total cost of the project including dam, reservoir, power plant, interconnecting cables, supply pipelines and water treatment plant, and other ancillary works is about $2.5 billion, funded by the Royal Government of Valladares. According to Gregory Marchino, CEO of EnergyValladares, who will operate the complex for 50 years, "the dam is expected to generate 8,900 GW·h electricity annually and is also expected to guarantee a continuous supply of drinking water to the city of Floriana and other nearby zones for at least the next 50 years. With this important work in operation, EnergyValladares is now committed to offer a quality service to the people of Río Oscuro, just like we've always done in Valladares."

During his intervention, King Cyrus of Valladares highlighted the great efforts made by the various parties involved to carry forward the project, in spite of the setbacks occurred during the construction process: "We had several problems, ranging from strikes, difficulties in red tape, to foreign outcry. However, we found that the different agents involved in the project were fully committed to it and willing to carry on. Despite all the difficulties and inconveniences we found, we never gave up, and now we can say that Floriana Dam is a reality." Meanwhile, Maetjib representatives emphasized on "the great benefits and progress that the dam will bring to Río Oscuro, Terranea, and Rushmore in general. For this reason, Maetjib put all its human resources available into the project because ultimately what matters is the overall welfare of the entire people from Río Oscuro."

The inauguration ceremony featured the presence of several political figures from both Valladares and Río Oscuro, as well as special guests invited by Maetjib plus the workers who were involved in the construction process, who enjoyed of both paragliding and water skiing shows during the event as well as the symbolic dumping of 250,000 cubic metres of mud from the reservoir downstream into the Florián River, this representing "both the farewell to an obscure era and the arrival of a new one of welfare and prosperity for the Nación Oscureña", according to a spokesperson from the government of Río Oscuro.

Environmentalists protest for the dam

At the same time, a group of Oscureño environmentalists and farmers protested in front of the building that houses the Ministry of Environment and Agriculture of Río Oscuro in Floriana for the opening of the dam. The protest, which started at around 7 in the morning with the group of 70 people blocking all entry to the building, lasted for around an hour with the protesters demanding compensation from the Oscureño government for the construction of the dam and its negative effects on the environment of the zone where the dam is located as well as the effects on the farming communities both in the zone and downstream. The protest was dispelled with the presence of a special corps of the Oscureño Police, who repelled the demonstrators with tear gas and forced them to retreat. Four demonstrators were arrested during the events, whilst sources from the Río Oscuro government declined to comment on the issue.

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by **Damukuni** » Mon Oct 19, 2015 7:25 pm

<< Previous Post | Next Post >>

THE LXXIII WORLD CUP
APOX · ROYAL KINGDOM OF QUÉBEC
on

Qualifying Stage
Group 5 | Qualifier 12 | 18 Oct 2015
(229)

DKI 0 - 1 YTT

(25)
University of Damushuto Stadium, University City, D.F., Damukuni

MATCH TIMELINE
presented by Supercel®DKI PLAYER TIME EVENT YTT
0 -- ---- 00:00 Start of Match 0
06 Nye 18:16 BOOKING YC
22 O'Doyle 56:00 GOAL 1
SUB 06 Takedashita 61:19 01 Sato 
03 Vellderfenstermacher 67:25 BOOKING YC
0 -- ---- 90:00 Full Time 1

Wisdom Tracey checked her watch. That stealth jet would be here any minute now. She had to remain under the radar to avoid being cut from the team. Although at this point, she thought to herself, there's absolutely no way I'd be let back on the team after this. She mulled the prospect of never being able to play football again for the national team. But there was more pressing business to take care of. She recalled an earlier conversation she'd had with Imazaki Shofune not three days ago:

"I need to see for myself if he's alive!"
"You'll do no such thing, young lady. First, a war is no place for a woman. Second, your team needs you. We only got as far as the quarterfinal in the Baptism of Fire, and there's no way the fans can expect us to qualify for even the Cup of Harmony without you --"
"We haven't even won a single game in the qualifiers yet! What is this all really about? Do your cronies in the BCC -- er, Damukuni FA want the money that bad?"
"Well, I -- I --"
"Go do a fundraiser! Have a car wash at every Winter States game or something! We're tired of being exploited at the hands of those poor excuses for execs sitting in comfy chairs in Damushuto while my entire town gets destroyed by that idiot St. Anne! My friends and family are dying in that mess, and all you care about is lining your pockets with the Ð25,000,000 the Damutel people give you!"

"Fune-san¹ should have shut his mouth. He knows I'm right," she muttered to herself. She wasn't far wrong, either. Ever since the old guard at the Board of Control of Cricket in Damukuni, who had to fold their organisation due to bad financial management, had re-organised themselves into a football magnate, they had enjoyed relative failure. They were able to fill the old cricket stadiums used to play football matches about a quarter full at most, all while raising even more millions of damuokane to feed the top people, while even the top players only got three-digit match fees.²
Her thoughts were interrupted by a man's voice. "Hello, Miss Tracey."
Wisdom whirled around to hear a masked man pointing a .45-caliber pistol at her. She instinctively raised her hands.
"Who are you? What do you want with me?" she asked, terrified.
The man motioned to the bushes, where several men and women, clad with the same black masks, surrounded her, tied and gagged her, and dragged her toward a small Derillon 450.³
"That should not be the question you are asking," the man said as he climbed into the passenger seat of the car. A woman took the pistol from him and climbed into the back seat with the terrified football player. "The question should be... what do you want with us?"

by **San Jose Guayabal** » Mon Oct 19, 2015 8:57 pm

OOC: Due to reasons of name complexity, Gregoryisgodistani names will be shortened

WC 73 Qualifiers: La Selecta woke up and beat GGS 1-3, after that another win and now it's time to close the First Half

Well, we already had won the two matches prior this one but the game vs Gregorysigodistan just demonstrated that La Selecta already woke up, a spectacular starting ten minutes crushed the Gregoryisgodistanis and then Sean Fraser just put the cherry on the cake, now La Selecta also defeated The Sword Bloke and faces Associated Godlands in the last Matchday of the first half for us.

By: Pakka Sulonen - The Sunday League coach of the typical Guayabalense neighborhood.
From: Uusimaa, Suojärvi, El Roblar - World Cup 73 - Qualifiers.
Posted: July 25th, 2203 - 23:32 (Guayabalense Western Time - User's local time)

Guayabalense fans before the match against Gregoryisgodistan in another edition of "El Clásico."

With the mind set on getting the three points, San José Guayabal decided to go play with a 3-1-3-3 that was a long time not being used but certainly the players were able to attach to the scheme Oliveira asked for this game especially consistent play on long passes, counterattacks and a compact defense, supported by midfielders to prevent any attempt against Gregoryisgodistan seek to attack to attack La Selecta during the course of the game, it was essential to maintain a safe distance between the lines of players in order to avoid creating holes in the midfield or in defense, logically it is known that a defensive team as Gregoryisgodistan against an opponent who attacked strongly seek to attack and surprise play opponents with a previously prepared during practice or any other especially prepared test days or even hours in advance, in order, knowing the discipline Gregoryisgodistan players, gadgets and rehearsed plays were things that could happen.

Unlike the previous game, Oliveira decided not saved anything and decided to play with all the normal alignment and even alter the roles Fraser, Zelaya and Faña have, making these three players in a much more offensive than it already is usually, advancing them at least five meters from the original position they play, another change would slightly pull back Sebastián Núñez just to have greater freedom to play in midfield, considering that the pressure exerted by the footslaves would be pretty intense, Leónidas Bregoo, Árbol Saucedo and Rudy Valencia maintained their positions in the scheme, while Mattías Passarelli would play a little behind in order to be a support for Terrazas at times it was necessary to act, Meyson Salume and James Moreira would try to play a role of sweepers at certain times and force Gregoryisgodistan midfielders to commit mistakes and make them lose the ball quickly and start again to add more pressure towards the goal of Farmer, who usually shows very well under the goal, stopping many shots that may well be goals if he did not intervene as it always used to do.

With the above said and added that Gregoryisgodistan altered the National Anthem of San José Guayabal in a shameful way and caused anger among the Guayabalense fans that threw flares onto the pitch, delaying the start by ten minutes and also the red card to Fatty Footy because he attemped to crush some Guayabalense fans to death but he was "calmed" by Guayabalense fans who decided to abuse phisically of him until injuring him on his left leg shin, the game began and La Selecta seemed to not think twice and decided to start the game attacking and seeking to stifle Gregoryisgodistan, the footslaves began with the ball and seemed decided to advance in block toward the goal of Terrazas, but a neat sweep by Rudy Valencia end the attempt of History Teacher, who fell and got up to remonstrate angrily to Valencia, Valencia just ignored him and walked away from the player, and all that had passed in a moment of game and had to throw in for La Selecta, Valencia decided to make the pass ball to Núñez, who controlled the ball to the edge of the area to give pass to Faña, who were encouraged to test the reflexes Prune Farmer, who reacted appropriately and sent the ball to the corner, the first for the Selecta in a fairly early moment of the match, Rodolfo Zelaya would be responsible for kicking and went promptly to the head of Saucedo, who nodded and beat the goal of Prune Farmer, scoring an important goal for La Selecta, was barely two minutes and already They were up 0-1, it was literally a bucket of cold water for the home crowd that didn't expected such a fast goal by La Selecta, the home fans were angry and started throwing glass bottles to some of the 70,000 Guayabalenses that made the journey to Gregoryisgodistan, fortunately there were only five wounded but whose injuries were not serious, just being superficial cuts.

The Selecta had achieved a dream start and tried to keep it on the same pace for a while, or even better, put more pressure on the already demoralized Gregoryisgodistani defense, and it seemed it would be another opportunity to La Selecta, a large pass of Bregoo to Zelaya, where Zelaya had his shirt seized by Jorge Warlord and ultimately ripped his shirt, the referee gave the foul favor of Zelaya, Warlord was yellow carded and Zelaya changed his shirt quickly as he would be in charge of making the free kick, Zelaya was positioned as always is used to do, kicked with his right leg straight to the goal Prune Farmer, who was watching static how the shot of Zelaya crashed off the crossbar, Prune Farmer rushed to take the ball and drop to soil in order lose some time and slow down the momentum of La Selecta for at least a couple of minutes, the referee seemed ready to give a yellow card to Prune Farmer for time wasting but cleared in time to the midfield, all this happened in just six minutes.

San José Guayabal literally looked like a whirlwind when ahead to attack but ten minutes would not be only a monologue by La Selecta, Gregoryisgodistan also had their attempts to enhance a play goal in the eighth minute sought perform a counter attack The Farmer defense cleared the ball and threw it straight Death who made a good run with the ball but James Moreira was pierced in front and took the ball with relative ease, Moreira decided to move towards a little ahead of the midfield for give the ball Saucedo who decided to take the pressure Slave Catcher you performed, centered the ball to where it was Fraser and Zelaya was Zelaya who rose and took the goalkeeper came to the right post so he decided to change the path to the ball He sent his header to the left post, so he managed to score the second goal for La Selecta in just nine minutes, this was another devastating blow to the mood of the footslaves who looked stunned as Zelaya carried out provocations fans Gregoryisgodistan while celebrating his goal, Death Zelaya approached and tackled him in the wild, the referee expelled Gregoryisgodistan Death and was left with nine players and a full game ahead, Zelaya was shown the yellow card for obscene gestures towards the home crowd.

Although there were no goals in the entire first half, the action of the game was played mostly on the side of Gregoryisgodistan, with only nine players managed to stand strong in defense and prevent more goals by San José Guayabal in that period, two minutes after the goal, Faña managed dangerously close to the goal of Farmer Prune to finish directly into the body of this, avoiding a third goal for La Selecta, which showed persistent to find that coveted goal three minutes later succeeded Sean Fraser against surprise attack and defend Gregoryisgodistan with a shot from outside the area, Prune Farmer sent the ball to a corner, and the risk increased for Gregoryisgodistan when little Faña managed to give a header and almost scoring the third goal of the match, History Teacher managed to get the ball from the goal line in order to avoid effectively. Or the fans themselves Guayabalenses imagined such verticality in the game of Selecta but this we must add that in just ten minutes of play had already been expelled two players of Gregoryisgodistan, still attempts to attack from San José Guayabal They remained strong but there was always a defense Gregoryisgodistan goal that kept falling.

It seemed that the incisive attack San José Guayabal but remained Gregoryisgodistan advantage that La Selecta had advanced too meters inside him, Xylocarp decided to throw long distance but Terrazas managed to stop the shot and send it to corner to avoid any kind of potential problems that may occur due to an unwanted ball or another kind of effect that may occur rebound, Who Cleans Up decided to make the corner and Xylocarp failed in giving the head, Terrazas came to try to clear the ball with his fists but he failed in the attempt, exposing the goal of La Selecta but fortunately the attempt Xylocarp caused no major problem as his shot went just wide to the side of the goal of Terrazas. And at that point we had reached the middle of the first time and what was observed was literally a monologue by San José Guayabal, who had cornered Gregoryisgodistan pass over the area and did not give them the opportunity to leave because the midfield La Selecta could retrieve the ball quickly but did not cause much trouble as he did early in the game, had eight shots on goal by La Selecta and just two of Gregoryisgodistan, a possession of 79% for La Selecta and just 21% for the footslaves, who had to conform to exploit one of the few opportunities that could cause during the course of the game.

La Selecta fans kept supporting as always, in an extremely passionate way and getting to the point of provoking Gregoryisgodistani fans, for thirty-two minutes, local fans threw sharp objects to Guayabalense fans but did not report more problem during that time, because it was reported that there were no injuries after the attack, as a revenge the Guayabalense fans decided to throw flares to the local fans and managed to burn approximately twelve people, causing second-degree burns to most in arms or chest, or even a case in which the hair of a woman was literally roasted to whom a seller threw water in order to safeguard her physical integrity. They are accidents that definitely we do not want to see but unfortunately occur in this case we know who cause it and those are the footslaves fans, the fans of La Selecta simply seek to defend themselves against the many abuses they receive from the Gregoryisgodistanis and their savage culture, but the fault is not of them, but who governs, that idiot who calls himself "god" is nothing but a person with a psychological complex of wanting attention and get their minute of fame by forcing innocent people to worship him in exchange for not murder, this kind of thing is simply outrageous. Returning to the level of football, what really matters more, for the last ten minutes of the game there was greater possibility to share a shot of Faña forty minutes and three that went wide of the goal Prune Farmer, be aware that Faña is not the kind of player who shoots from a distance, but he is the typical player that seeks to address the defenders and beat them with its notorious ability to dribble and ball handling to the point that it seems that it is tied the ball at his feet.

With a two-goal lead in the first half, the Selecta seemed more relaxed when he came backstage to talk halftime, who were if tense were the players Gregoryisgodistan who noticed anxious, perhaps the leader of psychopaths he threatened death during halftime but in fact, they went looking worried and tension, particularly Prune Farmer and the pressure that is typical of a goalkeeper, meet a two-goal deficit in the first half when you're local and you play against your archrival is nothing pleasant and certainly Lord Almighty Greg would give me the reason in this situation, so in the second half, forced to look for a better result was Gregoryisgodistan, at least looking to score a goal for the honor or who knows if it would achieve a draw in time, although the mission would be difficult considering they have two players less and La Selecta had a dream night at the time. With all these ingredients, an excellent second half was what we were coming to all sports fans certainly would stress or nervousness when just starting the game.

The game began and indeed predictably, Gregoryisgodistan rushed from the start but timely actions from Rudy Valencia prevented Gregoryisgodistan to advance, Valencia was complying fully the role of being the destroyer of game opponent, avoid making progress and recovering the ball to attacks by La Selecta, within forty-eight minutes, Valencia gave a long throw towards Faña, who managed to take the pressure off the keeper and placed the empty net, this could have been the 0-3 for San José Guayabal but unexpectedly slipped Faña when kick and sent the ball out of the goal, a miracle for Gregoryisgodistanis who saw their chance of a decent game remained intact, but could not be so easily capitalized by his notable absences in their players who had been expelled for misconduct at some point of the game. Finally, after clearance of Prune Farmer, Soldier tried to shoot from long distance and surprise Terrazas who was out of the goal, the shot Soldier came to the side of the net in an attempt to Guayabalense fans booed the way of pretending the nervousness that had suffered while the ball was in flight.

The game went on their way by the time, no opportunity occurred on the side of Gregoryisgodistan or on the side of La Selecta, the game had become a typical game in San José Guayabal vs Gregoryisgodistan, a game played in midfield with many failures and interruptions of the match, each ball will fight fiercely but these attempts always end up being useless for good work of recovery of the ball by both defenses or mid fields, it is a game of back and forth in the midfield and much strategy until sixty-third minute, Sean Fraser then a ball took a bad clearance by Prune Farmer and decided to run with his speed and feature towards the goal, succeeding in giving a pass to Zelaya who was pitifully a little wide and could not do anything more for taking illegal advantage of its position on the defensive, if the play had been performed as it should have been executed, this could have easily been 0-3 to San José Guayabal but unfortunately no it was, although there was more game ahead and any such eventuality could occur during the last twenty minutes.

After that attempt seemed that fans of La Selecta would calm more but is that about seventy minutes began one of the most stupid events that I have seen in my fucking life, a mock race between Lord Almighty Gregory and Queen Margaret I, where the above ran like crazy with the "Queen" was after "murdered" and the race was won by Gregory Lord Almighty, the winner of that race a slave as a "reward" would take. This show has been most embarrassing I've seen in my life, next to the ridiculous alteration suffered by the national anthem of San Jose Guayabal earlier in the same day, it was so stupid, yet outrageous that angered the Fans of La Selecta, who threw glass bottles and flares players Gregoryisgodistan Guy Who Cleans was hit by two rockets and suffered first-degree burns on his hands trying to grab them, had to be replaced by Slave Beater, police tried shoot the fans of La Selecta he had to choose the remedy of hide and seek refuge under the stairs of the enclosure, a sample of the cultural barbarity of that nation.

Five minutes later came the football response of San José Guayabal, Slave Beater came with danger danger to the area but Mattías Passarelli sweep to clear it and then send it to Sean Fraser who ran as he always used to do, Jorge Warlord came behind Fraser, tried to swept but Fraser avoided the sweep with a jump and approached the goal of Prune Farmer, Fraser came over against Prune Farmer and managed to avoid him so that after two steps he just finished off the empty goal and thus score the 0-3 to San José Guayabal and so completely mute the Lord Almighty Gregory National Stadium and make the goal crazed screams from the 70,000 Guayabalenses who traveled be heard in full, after hearing this, a boo was heard from local fans, the game was literally liquidated then already more than Gregoryisgodistan could hope at the time was the goal of honor, who made it 83 minutes with a header from Xylocarp after a corner, that way San José Guayabal had three decisive points for the aspirations of qualifying for the World Cup Finals, can not finish the first part of the playoffs but beat an opponent of this caliber away certifies a key victory.

Meanwhile in the next game, La Selecta managed to beat The Sword Bloke with a solitary goal by Juninho dos Santos in a disputed in the city of El Roblar, who played instead of Zelaya game, who was sent to the bench with in order to give rest after a physically demanding game that was against Gregoryisgodistan, the goal of Dos Santos came in the 30th minute after a withering backlash where after being face to face with goalkeeper decided to lift the ball over him, scoring a goal and that was enough for San José Guayabal managed to get three important points that put him at the head of the group 16 after Gregoryisgodistan equalized 1-1 against Jeruselem there in Jeruselem, so San José Guayabal has four wins and a defeat, adding twelve points and now has to face Associated Godlands as visitors, in what will be a tough game.

Estadio Luis Barbosa: Matchday 5 vs The Sword Bloke.

Location: El Roblar
Capacity: 114,005
Altitude: 3,659 meters above sea level
Tenants: El Roblar Town Hall

The Luis Barbosa Stadium is the second oldest stadium in the nation, and that more height is, It’s built over 3,600 meters high, the stadium is literally a fortress for the team that knows how to adapt to climate and height city, headquarters of Alliance the Roblar, Second Division team, this stadium has hosted nearly a dozen national team games in which has fallen defeated only once, being that when the selection was playing his first round towards the World Cup, the stadium has hosted BoF 56 and games in Globe Cup and also a World Cup 70 Semifinal

Provincial Anthem of El Roblar - Normally played before the two National Anthems.

The Cultural Hub and The Cradle of The Nation: El Roblar

The Heroic Town of El Roblar is definitely a city with a diverse and complex history, starting for over five hundred years from the time of conquest and colonization to independence, the city was largely responsible for the generation of the culture of San José Guayabal, sheltering a lot of famous writers, theater directors, linguists and politicians, to even the current queen of the nation is in this city. Located in the mountains, has different attractions such as La Feria (Located on the edge of Lake San Pedro) or tourist viewpoints in the highest part of the city, at 4,200 meters or for its diverse cultural heritage, it is certainly a city which anyone will leave with a pleasant memory and wishes to return.

Accommodations: Hotel Palacio, Arcos de La Montaña Lodge & Spa, Los Lirios Hostel, Restaurant One Thousand Heights, La Parrilla de Neto, El Refugio Restaurant, La Feria (Amusement Park)

Where can I visit? - Santa Marta Peak, El Roblar

Santa Marta Peak is the highest point in the nation, is also the highest place where you can get for free in the world. Formerly called Communism, the peak of Santa Marta stands at 8,658 meters above sea level and is a place frequented by climbers, anyone can climb without permission, only a nominal fee of NS$ 30 (C$ 15 Coronas) although it is recommended climb expeditions led by experts. You can also access by car to the base camp, located 5,100 meters high, where there is also a lake. It can be accessed by taking the Secondary Road 29 and then a $ 10 fee is paid (C$ 5- Regardless of the number of people who go), you can also climb up a secondary peak 6,710 meters high without equipment through a path of moderately difficult of hiking, which is taken in the southeast point of the lake.

by **Chromatika** » Mon Oct 19, 2015 8:58 pm

Another game, another narrow loss to a top-notch team. There was nothing wrong with that. Franscesca Cortes knew that there would be growing pains when it came to the Anomalies' chances in the world cup. Their farm system of developing new football players was just in its infancy, the domestic league had just ended its inaugural season, and people were just now getting used to supporting sports. It would take some number of years to develop both the League System, the fan base, all the infrastructure. This was a promising start, though. There was nothing getting around that.

The game against Sargossa actually could have been won. Aart had coordinated his back line to develop a system of double-teaming any forwards that came into their zone. If it wasn't for a set piece off of a questionable call, there was a big chance that the Chromatiks could have escaped with a draw.

She knew that the problem was with the offense. Counterattacking only does so much when your midfield can't push the ball up; The Anomalies were starting to fall behind on size, too.

All growing pains, all baby steps. Hopefully towards a respectable mid-table finish this time around, and even more later on...

by **San Llera** » Mon Oct 19, 2015 9:01 pm

The Player Bracket

Welcome back, it is time for another edition of the player bracket. The round of 32 is to take place today, so let's get started! Here are the match ups taking place:

And now for the match ups:

- Pasarga (1) vs (32) Kernansquillec -

Players: CM Csaszar Mor (Pasarga) vs ST Varinia Varano (Kernansquillec)
Analysis: We here at Viva Dicce are quite aware that Pasarga is very good. However, we are also quite aware that they have failed to produce a true superstar, and instead have a large array of elite but not godlike players, of which Csaszar Mor is one. And, finally, we are aware that while Varano means much more to Fluvique than Mor to Pasarga, she's still not anywhere near his level.
Winner: Csaszar Mor wins it.

- Eura (2) vs (34) Zenic -

Players: CAM Craig Sinclair (Eura) vs LM Gavin Barnsley (Zenic)
Analysis: 2 midfielders that orchestrate their country's offense and have British-sounding names. The biggest difference is that Sinclair orchestrates a far better offense.
Winner: The winner is Sinclair.

- Nephara (3) vs (35) Schottia -

Players: CM Elaine Ashdown (Nephara) vs CAM Kim Coultan (Schottia)
Analysis: In a battle of female players, I was quite tempted to got with Coultan here. Her precise technique, athleticism, and determination make her the driving force behind the entire Schottic team. But then again, she's facing Elaine Ashdown, a Nepharim midfielder who shares many of those qualities.
Winner: Still thinking about it but... got to go with Ashdown.

- The Holy Empire (4) vs (29) Abanhfleft -

Players: MID Michael Monomacho (The Holy Empire) vs CB Kyle Edwards (Abanhfleft)
Analysis: Michael Monomacho of The Holy Empire was a relative unknown heading into this World Cup, and selecting him was very difficult due to the small sample size of his games we watched. However, in the first few match days, he has performed impeccably, leading the clinical Holy Empire side. Up against him is Edwards, the reliable Fleftic center back.
Winner: I can't completely know what I'm getting from Monomacho, but I'll go with him anyway.

- Osarius (5) vs (28) HopNation -

Players: GK Efrain Suarez (Osarius) vs ST Pech Schytaing (HopNation)
Analysis: It is by no means easy to compare a goalkeeper and a striker. In terms of who does more for his team, the obvious answer is Schytaing, but his team hasn't qualified for the World Cup in the last two cycles and Suarez's team is Osarius. In terms of who is better compared to others at their position, Schytaing is a member of a very crowded group while Suarez could be the best in the world.
Winner: Efrain Suarez wins this matchup.

- Audioslavia (6) vs (27) Krytenia -

Players: Everything Aitor Jovellanos (Audioslavia) vs ST Valrauncion (Krytenia)
Analysis: Audioslavia vs Krytenia, an age-old rivalry between two sides who have been around for more than a century. While games on the pitch are more likely to sway towards Audioslavia, this is something different. While the Bulls certainly have more depth than the Aces, Krytenia has an excellent weapon in Valrauncion. And Valrauncion is so good at scoring goals that he bests Jovellanos, who is good at pretty much everything.
Winner: Valrauncion is an elf and the winner.

- Associated Godlands (58) vs (39) Timbermunich -

Players: CAM The Lord and Savior Jesus Christ (Associated Godlands) vs ST Great One-Arm Willy (Timbermunich)
Analysis: Ah, what a match up. Associated Godlands's star and sole goalscorer versus a Timbermunichian Great. Both seem to have magical powers and are very good at soccer, but which one is better? Great One-Arm Willy is certainly the better shooter, but Jesus does a better job tracking back on defense.
Winner: In the end, the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ's scoring record and seemingly limitless energy is too much.

- Valanora (8) vs (40) Jeruselem -

Players: ST Laborious Hawk (Valanora) vs ST Princess Laura Virginia Dallas (Jeruselem)
Analysis: You know what? This is an odd multiverse we live in. It's come to the point where deciding whether Jesus is a better soccer player than an immortal lumberjack person and then calmly moving on the the nest matchup of an elf and a princess is normal.

Now that that's out of the way, Laborious Hawk vs the princess!
Winner: Princess Laura Virginia Dallas is a very good striker, but not at the best-of-all-time level Laborious Hawk is on.

- Farfadillis (9) vs (24) Cosumar -

Players: ST Risko Kai (Farfadillis) vs ST Anders Engstrom (Cosumar)
Analysis: Another battle between two strikers. This time it's Farfadillis's Risko Kai versus Anders Engstron of Cosumar. Both are undoubtedly the face of their respective nations, but which one is better? The advantage goes to the one who is just a little faster, a little smarter, and a little better.
Winner: That person is Risko Kai.

- Port Christopher (55) vs (23) Brenecia -

Players: CM Diego Bandos (Port Christopher) vs CB/RB Orson Faulkner (Brenecia)
Analysis: Port Christopher's creative midfielder is faced against the strong leadership presence of Brenecian captain Orson Faulkner. Bandos has had a nice run, and he is a very good player, but Faulkner has a bit too much reliability and class for him in this case.
Winner: Orson Faulkner of Brenecia won the matchup.

- Valladares (11) vs (43) Sameba -

Players: ST Pedrinho (Valladares) vs ST Huele (Sameba)
Analysis: At long last, the battle between the two best one-named strikers in the multiverse. Pedrinho of Valladares can create a goal out of pretty much anything. Huele of Sameba also can create a goal out of pretty much everything. This is a tough choice.
Winner: This nearly reached the point where I flipped a coin, but I'm going with Pedrinho.

- Ko-oren (12) vs (21) Gregoryisgodistan -

Players: MID Timo Arevalo (Ko-oren) vs Enemy Crusher Fatty Footy (Gregoryisgodistan)
Analysis: Timo Arevalo is an excellent midfielder and the best player on an excellent team, but he holds no special talents besides being infinitely better at soccer than you or I will ever be. Enemy Crusher Fatty Footy, however, is very good at crushing enemies. This tactic is somewhat controversial, but hey, injuring opposing players works, and we've got to hand it to him.
Winner: Winner? Why, it's Enemy Crusher Fatty Footy.

- San Jose Guayabal (13) vs (20) Nova Anglicana -

Players: ST Rodolfo Zelaya (San Jose Guayabal) vs CAM Emmanuel Moga (Nova Anglicana)
Analysis: When I saw this matchup, it was clear in my head that Zelaya was a bit better than his competitor. See, Moga has plenty of talent, but Zelaya just has an energy that sets him apart, the way he makes all his teammates better.
Winner: Zelaya moves on.

- Barunia (14) vs (19) Super-Llamaland -

Players: DEF Felix Benitez (Barunia) vs ST Alex Cartwright (Super-Llamaland)
Analysis: Alex Cartwright's dwindling talent was just enough to get him by Kristiaan Amadi in the round of 64, but it may be a different story with the bullish Benitez. I think that at this point, Benitez overpowers Cartwright too much physically for me to vote in the Llamanean legend's favor.
Winner: Felix Benitex advances to the sweet 16.

- Yttribia (15) vs (47) Flardania -

Players: CDM Dionysis Turverro (Yttribia) vs CM Pandazi Papadopoulos (Flardania)
Analysis: I'm very inclined to go with Llara Llera's Papadopoulos (despite me being a Patria Poble fan), but I think I will resist. Turverro is the beating heart of Yttribia's team, and probably their only player who can play at a high level. Their success against Pasarga really speaks to the worldly talents he's bringing to the table.
Winner: Painful to say, but Turverro is the better of the two.

- Kirisaki (16) vs (17) Kandorith -

Players: CAM Mikoto Tsuchimikado (Kirisaki) vs ST Meng Zeije (Kandorith)
Analysis: Zeiji can score and set up goals very well, but there's a ton of people who can do that. But few players have the all-around skill set that Mikoto Tsuchimikado has.
Winner: Tshuchimikado is our final addition to the sweet sixteen.

That's a wrap on the round of 32! Thank you for joining us and see you next time on the player bracket.

by **Stvoto Latoli** » Mon Oct 19, 2015 9:52 pm

Groups 1-10 Matchday 5 Cutoff

Start Winning Now, Or...

SCORES

by **United States of Devonta** » Mon Oct 19, 2015 9:54 pm

The Turnaround
_{Devontans manage to defeat 47th ranked Fleftic team after a long struggle}

United States of Devonta 0-0 Abanhfleft

United States of Devonta (4-4-2 Diamond): Cooper, Brooks, Benton, Kindred, Liam, Russell, Abdullah, Edwards, Owens, Johansen, Adams
Abanhfleft (4-3-1-2): Varamoninov, Mikkelsen, L. Edwards, Samonte, Amoroso, Musa, Zolnerov, Turpentine, Potter, R. Edwards, Kelvin

Quick Stats:
45% Possessions, 8 Shots, 5 on goal, 4 corners
55% Possessions, 12 Shots, 7 on goal, 2 corners

Goals:
Johansen (22'), Abdullah (34'), Adams (89')
R. Edwards (4'), Kelvin (67')

CAUTIONED: Liam (22'), Samonte (68')
EJECTED: --NONE--

Table:
  Group 18                              Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
1 Saintland                               4    3   1   0     8    2   +6    10
2 Abanhfleft                              5    3   0   2    11    8   +3     9
3 United States of Devonta                4    2   1   1     5    6   −1     7
4 New Gelderland                          5    1   2   2     3    4   −1     5
5 Witty Penguins                          4    1   2   1     1    2   −1     5
6 Maklohi Vai                             4    1   1   2     2    3   −1     4
7 Cuboneland                              4    0   1   3     3    8   −5     1
Schedule:
MD1: United States of Devonta 0-4 Saintland
MD2: United States of Devonta 2-0 New Gelderland
MD3: United States of Devonta 0-0 Witty Penguins
MD4: BYE
MD5: United States of Devonta 3-2 Abanhfleft
MD6: United States of Devonta Vs. Maklohi Vai
MD7: United States of Devonta Vs. Cuboneland
RD: BYE
MD8: United States of Devonta Vs. Saintland
MD9: United States of Devonta Vs. New Gelderland
MD10: United States of Devonta Vs. Witty Penguins
MD11: BYE
MD12: United States of Devonta Vs. Abanhfleft
MD13: United States of Devonta Vs. Maklohi Vai
MD14: United States of Devonta Vs. Cuboneland

Other Group 18 Games:
Witty Penguins 1-0 Maklohi Vai
Cuboneland 0-3 New Gelderland

----MATCHDAY FIVE----

Matchday Five | Abanhfleft | 47th Ranked | @Capitol Stadium, Devonta City, United States of Devonta | 65,337 attendance | Ref. Teresa Ryder

by **Associated Godlands** » Mon Oct 19, 2015 10:00 pm

GodHatesYou.God
The official blog of Shirley Phelps-Roper

Hello followers. We have a bye today, so there's not much to write about our soccer team, but it does mean I'm not as busy, so I have time over here!

Remember how I requested a video feed of Hell from God? Well, he hasn't gotten back to me yet, but I've been thinking a lot about the media. Yes, God hates the media, but there's good media and bad media. And this is good media, which is why this website, along with NewsWrapAssociatedGodlands.God, are the only two websites legal in this nation. At least they were. Not anymore.

So I, Shirley Phelps-Roper, am proud to announce the launch of AssociatedGodlands.God, our country's official website!

It's not exactly a news source, or a blog, but more of an informative place where you and foreigners can read about our country! It also includes the exciting new "Are you a heathen?" quiz which you can take, and it sends us your results!

And the most exciting news - this is not the first one. In the next several weeks, I will be launching more great websites to use as resources. Because God only hates the media if it's bad media! Good night followers.

by **Witty Penguins** » Tue Oct 20, 2015 12:43 am

(OOC: I didn't have time on the 18th to write an RP for vs Abanhfleft, so I've included both Matchday 4 and 5 articles in my post)

WC QUALIFIERS: Abanhfleft 2-0 A.U.W.P.

18 October 2015

WANDA ISLAND, ABANHFLEFT - And the streak came to an end. Up to this point Witty Penguins had been successful in not losing a single game in their World Cup campaign. Of course they hadn't won a single game either, but to draw is better than to lose. However today the Penguin's streak has ended with a 2-0 loss against Abanhfleft. The Penguinish side knew that this match would be a difficult challenge. Abanhfleft were ranked second in Group 18, and already had two wins to their name - New Gelderland and Cuboneland were ultimately no match for the 47th ranked team. Regardless the players and the team had entered with high spirits - football guarantees nothing, and the unexpected can happen, demonstrated by a couple of other matches already in the Qualifiers. Unfortunately, as minutes and goals past, it became clearer that it would not be the day for the Penguins.

As the national anthems concluded and the match commenced the Penguinish team started off in decent form. The defense worked hard to try and keep the scoreline down, but their performance was evidently poorer in contrast to their earlier matches. The Fleftic strikers' form was exceptional, and their work was awarded early on. In the 33rd minute the Penguins conceded their first goal of the tournament. Luke Edwards hit a long ball, received by striker Kevin Klevin. Klevin proceeded to break past the defenders and Oliver Johnson, taking the score to 1-0. An attempt by Troy Cornet to break even the score was unsuccessful,
with his shot being easily deflected by Maksim Varamoninov. Cornet's 39th minute attempt would be the only on-target attempt the Penguins would have throughout the match. Abanhfleft midfielder Valery Zolnerov sealed his opponent's fate in the 78th minute, with the final result being 2-0 to the home side.

"They [Abanhfleft] played a good match, and ultimately they were the superior team today. We had a few chances to settle the score, and we need to work on making the most of those opportunities because if you waste one, you might not be able to get another," said Richard Peak in his post-match conference.

"Our primary goal is to improve our offense. Gunther, Cornet and the others have some good potential; we just need to ultilise it. But overall it was a good experience playing a high-ranked team like Abanhfleft. Up to now we've mostly played low-ranked teams, so this match has really pushed the players to work hard. And I'm sure they can come back stronger when Abanhfleft comes to Unitia City for round two."

Tomorrow the Penguins will be playing at home in the Unitia City Stadium against 92nd ranked Maklohi Vai.

WC QUALIFIERS: A.U.W.P. 1-0 Maklohi Vai

19 October 2015

UNITIA CITY - It has been a big turnaround for the Penguins today, with the team finally securing their first victory in the 73rd World Cup Qualifiers. Coming off a disappointing 2-0 loss against Abanhfleft yesterday, the team put on an impressive performance against the visitors, winning 1-0 against Maklohi Vai. It is a very positive result for the team, being their second ever win, and a strong confidence boost as their match against no. 14th ranked team Saintland looms closer and closer.

The players' performance was a marked improvement from their previous fixture. In their match against Abanhfleft, the defense were unable to hold against the opposing offensive. The strikers were able to find their way, and ultimately cost the team the match. However, it seems to have acted as a motivator, with the defense holding up much stronger against Maklohi Vai. Quick with the ball, Garley and Strathmore prevented a majority of the direct attacks by Segundo and Makanopalani. The game had only just reached the quarter-mark when the Penguins scored the first and only goal of the match. They were awarded a corner, with Troy Cornet crossing it over to Klaus Gunther, who proceeded to kick the ball into the top right corner, well out of the reach of Numatao Makai. As in the previous match, the offensive seemed to die down in the second-half, but it was compensated by the defense hunkering down to keep the score 1-0. In the 70th minute an aggressive tackle against one of the Maklohi Vai players earned Troy Cornet a yellow card; he would be subbed off minutes later. Maklohi Vai did manage to get some opportunities at goal; Makanopalani attempted to make an equalisier early in the second half, which was miraculously hit to safety by Oliver Johnson. But ultimately, the visitors were unable to score, leaving defeated.

Jubiliation was evident in the streets of Unitia City. Streams of blue and white poured down Main Street, as supporters went out and celebrated the victory.

"It's a fantastic day. They played great, I'm sure this won't be the last from the team," said a devout supporter who was part of the celebration on Main Street.

Richard Peak said that he was very pleased with the outcome.

"The team played a great game. Compared to yesterday's performance they were playing in a very good form. They'll be getting beers on me tonight at the bar."

However he also noted that the team still has room to improve further. In spite of the win, the Penguins still remain in 5th place with 5 points, equal to that of New Gelderland. The team faces 7th place Cuboneland tomorrow, before coming back home to play against 1st place Saintland, who are the only team in the group yet to lose a match.

by **Alasdair I Frosticus** » Tue Oct 20, 2015 5:04 am

Fashion
F-F-F-F-F-Fashion
F-Fashion
S-S-Style
War
L-L-L-Look look look

I'm the edge
I'm the chic
I'm the taste
I'm a larger than life with just a hint of lace
I'm avant-garde, I'm the heir, I'm the Vogue
I'm the she she ohh hee hee
I'm the man a la mode

Hello.

I'm Jorge Armanes, and welcome to our look at the second kit up for voting in the simply ever so exciting Choose the Holy Empire's Kit competition - which remains open until the end of qualification.

Now, if you've been paying attention to Mundy news, you'll know that a company called K-Kittehs from the nation of Kernansquiggly (or something like that, anyway; I can't say I've followed the news too closely) has managed to get its Ordinary Reality knickers in a twist over a rather hilarious charge of plagiarism. Now, that lovely Zoe Lascaruso over at the Holy Empire Football Association has already dealt with these baseless charges in some detail elsewhere. So no need for me to go further; let's just say that the accusation is so hilarious that even Saintland are on our side on this one.

Frankly, I think it's just because the people of Kernelsquiggle take one look at our manly studmuffin footballers - now firmly in first in their group with a game in hand following their 2-1 away victory over New West Guiana - and then look at their team, what with its confusion of genders, unnecessarily complicated central-three midfield formation, and the frankly incomprehensible accents over captain Adélaïde Noupen's name, and they're consumed with a raging jealousy towards the smouldering volcanoes of virile manhood that make up our team; and not just because their 5-0 spanking by Barunia leaves them languishing in third. I mean, let's just look at our captains; gay, straight, bisexual, or miscellaneous other, if you wanted to shag a footballer, would you pick Ms Noupen - who, quite apart from looking a bit spindly and anaemic, is constantly having to compete with Spijker and Blackwood in the centre of the Korninsquegs midfield - or a strong, dominant, powerful specimen of imperial masculinity like Michael Monomacho? Why, even over in San Llera they're swooning over mighty Monomacho, placing him in the top 16 footballers in the current tournament.

But I digress. As you all know, passive aggressive sneers towards Mundies are utterly beneath me; not the sort of thing I'd indulge in. Today is all about fashion. So here's none other than Michael Monomacho himself - sorry, I need to pause to fan myself - to model option 2 in the Choose the Holy Empire's Kits competition:

Now, the first thing you'll notice about this kit is that this version only works in two dimensions - which is a little awkward since the World Cup typically takes place in three. We'll get back to that point in a moment, but otherwise there's much to admire about this kit. For one, it has shorts, so unlike option 1, we don't have to worry about offending the natives in more prudish nations. It's also not so much a transformation of the existing kit, but rather a gentle tweaking; incorporating yet modernising many of the classic elements.

But the two dimensional issue is potentially a problem. Now, we're quite used to playing friendlies with Flatland (who really need to enter a team into the World Cup; that might shake up some of the Mundy perceptions about how many dimensions you can play football in - it would certainly teach the Carnininsquaggle lot a thing or two), and we know that you get around the problem of the goalkeeper being able to stop every shot via the simple expedient of standing in front of the single post by angling the goals to given the impression of perspective. Here's a high-definition picture of our last friendly with Flatland to illustrate the point:

But getting a two-dimensional kit to work in three-dimensional space is a little more awkward. Nonetheless, leading dimensional specialists at the Imperial University's School of Fashion assure me that they can add a Z axis to the existing Y and X axes without too much difficulty if the present kit is chosen as the winner.

Fashion can solve any problem.

Join me tomorrow night when we'll be looking at Option 3 - otherwise known as 'the one with socks'!

by **Jeruselem** » Tue Oct 20, 2015 5:47 am

Fifi: This is Fifi Trooble for Naked News Jeruselem! We're at Dazza Dallas Stadium for the 5th World Cup qualifier game. I'm with veteran midfield Laurina Dallas. That's not the striker Princess Laura for those who can't tell the difference.
Laurina: Oh hi
Fifi: Gregoryisgodistan one of big rivals came here to take us down today
Laurina: Uh yes, Gregoryisgodistan are difficult opponent in terms of football and in terms of ... well anything
Fifi: We've faced off with the top seed but this was a real struggle today
Laurina: Yes, nothing like the previous game

Fifi: We did get away with 1 all draw which isn't exactly a bad result
Laurina: We could have lost and well handed over 3 points to Gregoryisgodistan but we could have one too
Fifi: They did have a much more competent defense than the last opponent
Laurina: For sure, a totally different game. We did far more defending really.
Fifi: Given Gregoryisgodistan were supposed to beat us, a good result
Laurina: I would say so but Princess Laura reckons she had scored an extra goal except the ref didn't agree

Fifi: Associated Godlands had the bye, and well somehow stayed third.
Laurina: They sure are a surprise package in group 16
Fifi: San Jose Guayabal rolled on beating the Sword Bloke 1-0 take the top the team pushing Jeruselem back to 2nd.
Laurina: It's a good thing we beat them while they weren't prepared
Fifi: Natanians and Nosts finally got some points beating Aeqamustopia 2-0, meaning Aeqamustopia are still pointless.
Laurina: I guess it must be relief for them to get points really.

Fifi: There's rumours of retirement from you
Laurina: Depends how I cope with this World Cup
Fifi: Getting older and harder to cope with the demands of all the travel?
Laurina: More like I have kids and well, they are real demanding of my time
Fifi: Retiring totally or just from international football?
Laurina: I have to work, I don't get lots of money unlike them princesses

Fifi: Do you feel threatened by some of these new young players in the midfield?
Laurina: No no, we need new blood. I'm not getting any younger and well, I can't play like this forever.
Fifi: Is it true you have breast cancer?
Laurina: No, I dunno where that came from. Mum had it but so far I've been lucky.
Fifi: That's it from me, and Laurina.
Laura: Hey, sorry to bother you but we found one of your kids wandering around again
Laurina: My son again?

Laura: Yeah
Laurina: That's normal, he likes to ... wander off a lot
Laura: Don't worry, Aunty Laura will set him straight
Laurina: Go ahead, he doesn't listen to me
Fifi: See you all later!
Laura: See you later, in another country I will be that is.

OOC

San Jose Guayabal 1–0 The Sword Bloke
Jeruselem 1–1 Gregoryisgodistan
Aeqamustopia 0–2 Natanians and Nosts
Associated Godlands bye

works? · by **Abanhfleft** » Tue Oct 20, 2015 6:11 am

The Saga of All-Inclusive Haranguer F.C., Part Six

"And who might you be?" Tom Mereilles challenged the mystery man sitting cross-legged and comfortably inside the office.

"Surely you must recognize me," the man replied. "Is the son of Haranguer really not recognized by his own town? Like Jesus and Nazareth?"

"I'm sorry, sir, you have to forgive my husband, he's quite brash, he is," Janine Fuller replied in her husband's stead. She then stepped closer to the man and saw a familiar face in the shadows of the poorly-lit room. "You're Dirk Ballinger," she said.

"The one and only," Ballinger said, standing up and offering his hand for the couple to shake. Dirk Ballinger was a popular television and movie actor, born and raised in little Haranguer deep in the middle of dusty Myleishi Plateau, hence his nickname "the Son of Haranguer." He was also a known and avid fan of All-Inclusive.

"Oh, Dirk Ballinger!" Tom said, recognition finally washing over his features. "If you'd introduced yourself sooner instead of sitting there like a mystery man in a TV show then we wouldn't have been so confrontational with you. By the way, I really love The Interceptors. Especially your latest season!" Ballinger was the star of the hit TV series The Interceptors, and its most recent season had been filmed in the Myleishi Plateau.

"Well, at least that's out of the way now," Ballinger said.

"Sit down, please, Mr. Ballinger," Tom said as he and Janine took their seats behind their respective desks.

"Please, call me Dirk," Ballinger said as he sat down on the chair that he had been sitting in before.

"So, Dirk, what brings a TV actor like you out here to Haranguer?" Tom asked. "You're not about to make a film about football, are you?"

"I suppose you can say that I'm making a movie about football," Ballinger replied. "Except that this movie is actually real life."

"So a reality series then?"

"Much more than reality TV. I'm talking about making the story of All-Inclusive Haranguer as it unfolds, day by day. You see, ever since I was of legal age I had signed up as a member of All-Inclusive's fan club, which also counts as a membership for the club board. Now, I know that the club hasn't been performing as well as the fans and the board would've liked, but then that's not actually surprising given that All-Inclusive really doesn't have that big of a budget to buy the game-changing players that will finally get our beloved team to the Premier League. So I thought that it's high time that I gave back to the club that has been my childhood inspiration, and my heart and soul."

"What exactly are you talking about?" Janine asked a bit cautiously. If he was talking about giving back to the club that he had supported all his life, surely that didn't mean...

"Yes, it's true," Ballinger nodded his head. "I'm going to give All-Inclusive Haranguer a blank check donation. Are there any players that you want to get into the team but can't because you simply don't have the funds? Then worry no more, because all you need to do now is tell me, and I'll give you all the funds that you need to seal these transfers that will finally see us go up to the Premiership."

Tom and Janine looked at each other in mute disbelief. If what Dirk Ballinger was saying was true, and it could very well be true because he was one of the richest actors in the business, it meant that they now had the financial clout to get any and every player that they wanted. It was just like being bought by a billionaire and turned into his or her personal investment-slash-plaything--there were a few female billionaires that had invested into football teams--with the bonus that the billionaire buying the club was a true fan who really wanted what was best for the club.

"You do realize that donating us that much money doesn't give you a lot more votes on the board?" Janine asked the actor.

"Why would you think that?" Ballinger asked in reply. "I am a loyal fan of All-Inclusive, but I'm not going to use my wealth to steer the club onto my personal agenda. The fans know best, right? I'm just one fan. There are a lot of other fans out there. Trust me, I know what I'm getting into."

"Well, then, in that case, can you write us a check for N$7.5 million?"

"7.5 million NS bucks?" Ballinger then laughed his signature laugh. "I can even do that right now!"

And just like that, All-Inclusive Haranguer completed its third major signing of the transfer window, with Sam Gonza being purchased from Alkanter F.C. of Fluvique for a fee of N$7.5m. At the same press conference that unveiled Gonza as an All-Inclusive player, the club also announced that prominent TV actor Dirk Ballinger had made a "substantial financial investment" in the club, which paved the way for the signing of Gonza, who was now the club's new record signing.

"I have been given a great opportunity to make history for the sport of football, and to not take it would have been madness," Gonza said in the press conference at his unveiling. At first, the club didn't want me to go, but after I realized that history was being made here, I seized the initiative. It would be a great honor to help take All-Inclusive to the Fleftic Premier League."

But this joy of making All-Inclusive's record signing was soon tempered by the news that yet another player that they wanted to sign was not available. Daniella Abate, the Estelarian keeper that the club had kept an eye on during Estelar's sadly short run in the Baptism of Fire, while open to a move to another club, would prefer to go to a club that played regular UICA football, whatever the hell that meant. But one thing was clear: they wouldn't be getting Abate anytime soon.

But as always, it wasn't the end of the world. There was still one source of players from which All-Inclusive could get good players that could help them in their promotion challenge: the free agents list. They were already sneaking a peek for possibilities in the listings for free agents every week or two, but the Estelarians had also made the suggestion in their reply email for the inquiry on Dani Abate. And the Estelarians had also suggested a keeper that All-Inclusive may be interested in signing: Callisto Parra, currently third-string or so goalkeeper for the Estelarian national football team and formerly of Pisces Sinastry.

Callisto Parra's situation was quite like that faced by two of All-Inclusive's early transfer targets Victoria Carter and Valery Zolnerov, in that they were all out of contract players. The only difference was that while Carter and Zolnerov had signed new contracts with their respective clubs, Parra had opted out of a new contract and was now a bonafide free agent. So there was really a chance for All-Inclusive to pick her up, and for free too! From what they'd seen of her performances available on the Internet, she was a good keeper, easily on the level of Unang Liga keepers and even possibly some of the lower-table teams in the Premier League. She was third-string only because the other keepers on Estelar's national team were just that much better, case in point Dani Abate, All-Inclusive's original transfer target.

Once the contract signing and the medical was done and dusted, Callisto Parra was unveiled as All-Inclusive Haranguer's latest signing, and new starting goalkeeper, if the number 1 on the back of her shirt was evidence enough. Her first official statement as an All-Inclusive player was almost exactly the same as the statements of Sutalen Desoka, Larre Torson and Sam Gonza.

It was a good week for Janine and Tom, having finally concluded successful business for top quality players. As Janine leaned back on her chair, her cellphone suddenly rang. When she checked it, it showed that the caller was an unknown number. Still she picked it up and said, "Hello?"

"Hello, is this All-Inclusive Haranguer's manager?" the voice at the other end of the line, a girl or woman by the sound of it, replied.

"Yes, this is Janine Fuller of All-Inclusive Haranguer," Janine replied carefully. "Is there any reason for this call?"

"My name is Samantha Leroux, Ms. Fuller. I would like to ask if there is a position available for me in your club. I would like to sign for All-Inclusive Haranguer."

CRESCENT NEWS NETWORK
SPORTS CHANNEL - OFFICIAL WEBSITE
ABANHFLEFT • PRIDNESTROVIA • OONTAZ DERT LI NG • COPPER CUPRUM • TRENDSTART • FHULGHAMOUS PENINSULA

WORLD CUP 73 QUALIFIERS: UNITED STATES OF DEVONTA VS ABANHFLEFT
By Malik Qazizadah

Players of the Abanhfleft men's national football team hang their heads after defeat to the United States of Devonta. Goals from Rory Edwards and Kevin Kelvin weren't enough to stave off defeat against the resurgent Devontans. (Courtesy of Crescent News Network Sports Channel/Andros Tasasa)

DEVONTA CITY, UNITED STATES OF DEVONTA - It was another defeat for Abanhfleft after a run of two victories in the group stage as United States of Devonta ultimately proved triumphant in a goal-filled encounter.

Rory Edwards nodded the Democratic Republic ahead within four minutes of the game following a superb cross from Charles Amoroso.

Gerald Van Johansen equalized for the home side almost twenty minutes later with a free kick from 23 yards that swept past Maksim Varamoninov and into the left corner of the net.

Mohamed Zari Abdullah handed his team the advantage on the counter, sweeping the ball off of Valery Zolnerov's feet and charging down to goal before slotting past Varamoninov who went on a despairing reach for the ball.

Kevin Kelvin restored parity deep into the second half after what had to be a dozen attempts at goal, finally managing to dink the ball into the post and beyond the Devontan keeper, who had been caught standing still.

Both sides then sparked into frenetic action in the last twenty minutes, with shots hitting the woodwork or blazing out to the stands before Lamar Adams finally poked home the game-winner with just a few minutes left to play following miscommunication in defending a corner.

Gustavo Potter was unlucky to be found offside when he had stroked home what he hoped to be a third equalizer in the dying minutes of stoppage time.

Abanhfleft manager Kasper Molak: Team didn't have best game today, were overconfident

Abanhfleft manager Kasper Molak: "I don't know what else to say, except that we went into this game a wee bit overconfident, and that meant we weren't playing at our best today.

"We saw how we gave Saintland a scare at home just a few months ago, and we should've taken that into account when we played Devonta today. We overestimated ourselves and underestimated them. It will be a day to forget for Fleftic fans."

In other Group 18 news, New Gelderland and Witty Penguins were finally victorious over opponents Cuboneland and Makhlohi Vai respectively. Abanhfleft will have a bye day in the coming matchday.

UNITED STATES OF DEVONTA 3 - 2 ABANHFLEFT
          JOHANSEN (22')       R. EDWARDS (4')
          ABDULLAH (34')       KELVIN (67')
             ADAMS (89')

ABANHFLEFT
GK: 01 Varamoninov
RB: 05 Amoroso
RCB: 04 L. Edwards
LCB: 03 Mikkelsen
LB: 02 Samonte █ (Emilianovski - 70')
RM: 08 Turpentine
CM: 19 Zolnerov
LM: 06 Musa
CAM: 20 R. Edwards (Floyd - 82')
RS: 11 Kelvin
LS: 10 Potter (Beineka - 70')

UNITED STATES OF DEVONTA
GK: 01 Cooper
RB: 07 Liam █ (Martin - 56')
RCB: 06 Kindred
LCB: 05 Benton (Takishima - 80')
LB: 02 Brooks (Alvarez - 69')
CDM: 04 Russell
RM: 14 Edwards
LM: 12 Abdullah
CAM: 17 Owens
ST: 21 Adams
ST: 19 Johansen

MATCH STATISTICS
Possession
United States of Devonta: 45%
Abanhfleft: 55%
Shots
United States of Devonta: 8 (5 on target)
Abanhfleft: 12 (7 on target)
Corners
United States of Devonta: 4
Abanhfleft: 2
Fouls
United States of Devonta: 6
Abanhfleft: 6

by **Kandorith** » Tue Oct 20, 2015 7:27 am

Kandorith Digs In

Saaksvala 1–2 Kandorith

Kandorith has not been disappointing during the current World Cup Qualifiers, even away the Red Dragons remain a strong and defensive team. With yet another victory for Huangzhou's team they find themselves firmly in first place of the pool now. With the fans being even more jubilant than normal, this can be considered one of Kandorith's most successful qualification campaigns.

With the first place now in their hands, the Kandorese national team will be looking for their next goal for this canpaign; qualifying directly towards the finals. Huangzhou's leadership has made a solid and tough team out of a fairly well known side on the world cup, although this is the first year Kandorith is holding up their expectations to the fans and the association. In the coming matches Kandorith has to prove their goal scoring abilities, as they have already shown to be very capable in the defensive area.

by **Kaboomlandia** » Tue Oct 20, 2015 7:29 am

Phoenix fall short against Sunrise Islands

It was a game they had to win. And they didn't. The Kaboomlandia Phoenix lost 1-0 to Unified Sunrise Islands in a match that drops them to sixth place in their group, behind only last-place Zackalantis. While the offside trap drove the Sunrisians nuts in the first half with McEachern not having much trouble, Rene Allard was a non-factor thanks to Waseem Biskara. "Losing to a backup squad is embarrassing. We need to snap out of this and start playing soccer," argued coach Ryan White. "We need a big performance over Zackalantis, or things will get ugly." The team plays unranked Zackalantis tomorrow before finishing the first leg of the group stage against Omerica.

by **Copper Cuprum** » Tue Oct 20, 2015 8:06 am

From the diary of Prince Deg

6 January 2016
The rest day has done wonders for our team. Everyone is raring to go for the game against Stvoto Latoli. We are in fine form at the moment. I am confident that we can steal a win here. Go Copperites!

(The following entry appears to have been made a few hours after the game between Copper Cuprum and Stvoto Latoli. Sweat stains and patches of dried chicken blood litter the pages of the diary)

Not really, diary. All these Stvoto players with long and unpronounceable names made our day hard. At least we held our own for more than an hour before that striker of theirs, Zhoozhoo or something like it, struck. A 1-0 loss isn't that bad of a result, but it doesn't reflect the game. We were pretty much equal throughout the game. But forget this game. Onwards to the next!

CRESCENT NEWS NETWORK
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ABANHFLEFT • PRIDNESTROVIA • OONTAZ DERT LI NG • COPPER CUPRUM • TRENDSTART • FHULGHAMOUS PENINSULA

WORLD CUP 73 QUALIFIERS: COPPER CUPRUM VS STVOTO LATOLI
By Malik Qazizadah

Stvoto Latoli's Tastvu Zhooheizhyu attempts a shot at goal. A goal from him was good enough to give Stvoto Latoli all three points away at Copper Cuprum. (Courtesy of Crescent News Network Sports Channel/Andros Tasasa)

WA GON, COPPER CUPRUM - A single goal from Tastvu Zhooheizhyu was all that was needed to separate the two teams during their first ever international meeting between Stvoto Latoli and Copper Cuprum.

Copper Cuprum's defense held for the entirety of an hour before Zhooheizhyu finally made the breakthrough that gave his side the lead and eventually the win.

Prince Deg had a chance to equalize in second half extra time but was declared offside.

COPPER CUPRUM 0 - 1 STVOTO LATOLI
                    ZHOOHEIZHYU (61')

by **Dreamplanet** » Tue Oct 20, 2015 8:10 am

The Sarian 4-1 Dreamplanet

A unexpected beating.

"Atleast we got one back." Said João Pedro, looking at the results sheet..
"Have any of you noticed that we're the only country that has scored every time in our group?" Said a suprized Aaron Hungar.
"Filipe, i think you should go in goal, I think i've lost it a bit." Said a depressed Rafael Dos Bosques, concerning that he conceded 10 goals in 3 games (2 against Barunia, 4 against RealSquad and The Sarian.)
"Yeah, sure, i'll go do 3 games aswell, so what would be... Garifunya... Geez... Kernasquillec and the match which is the one the fans are looking foward to: Britonisea vs Dreamplanet!" Said Filipe Vaz, checking the matches.

"Well, but before Garifunyia we have a bye, which means we'll have enough time to do training. But it's gonna be a hard match, i think against Garifunya we will lose our record of scoring every match." Said a determined João Pedro, "If we're gonna lose, atleast don't make yourself look like fools like you did against Britonisea."

by **Krytenia** » Tue Oct 20, 2015 9:50 am

K1K: The Game Of History

MATCH #809: HELL HAS FROZEN OVER, AND NOW IT'S SKY BLUE
Krytenia 3-1 The Babbage Islands, World Cup 58 Semi-Final
Khaldoon, Queer Poco el Mono Ara, 9 July 2166

It's time for the Retrospective to look back at a match completlely unique in the senior team's one thousand game history: Krytenia winning a semi-final.

THE BUILD-UP
Pretty much every Krytenian knows about World Cup LVIII. For the reasons we're about to delve into, it's indelibly marked in Krytenian sporting history.

What many forget is that the side nearly didn't make it to the last thirty-two. The qualifying campaign had been a good one; a huge number of entrants, though, meant that only the top team of nine got a direct place, and defeat to Swartaz in the penultimate game had handed them the group. The Aces ground out a labouring one-nil win over the long-forgotten Kangaroo Republic, and spluttered almost apologetically into the finals.

Perhaps, though, staring into the face of the abyss - and barely escaping - helped to steel the side. True, Kulverint played out of their skins to earn a well-deserved draw, but the Aces were not to be denied. Swartaz, who'd almost cost the Krytenians in place, were swept aside five-nil...and then came Bostopia, who were completely annihilated in an eight-nil triumph that (unless we are mistaken) remains the biggest win in the World Cup finals tournament.

So, then, to the knockouts. Catharsis against Swartaz in the groups was followed by catharsis against Polar Islandstates, who'd denied them the bronze medals four years prior. The hosts were next, but not even the inexplicably monikered Queer Poco el Mono Ara could stop the Aces making it to their sixth World Cup semi-final. Five times they had reached the last four; five times they had played in the third place match. Standing in their way this time, were the Babbage Islands, a team that, like Krytenia, were well-respected despite a lack of success. The scene was set, the players were ready, and so to the game...

THE MATCH
The Krytenia-Babbage match was almost second fiddle to its counterpart, a game between world champions Aguazul and a Vanorian side rumoured to be having its World Cup swansong. (Sadly for our World Cup LXXII team, this turned out not to be the case.) Nevertheless, it served as a scintillating aperitif. Would the Babbage Islands make it to their second final? Would the Aces finally reach the promised land? Both sides, unsurprisingly, put out their strongest line-ups and prepared for footballing warfare. The Bumblebees were built upon a strong defence, denying opponents the oxygen of opportunity and sucker-punching them when the guard eventually dropped. Krytenia, meanwhile, would be a stern test, as the passing game that we've been used to seeing in recent years had been perfected by manager Francisco Vázquez García and his famed "Fiesta Football". His 3-4-3 formation was a revelation, and it would be up to the Babbage back line to stop them.

It proved to be a tricky task. Krytenia simply overwhelmed the midfield, with crisp, short passing moving the ball around quickly and bamboozling the Bumblebees. George Wilson, in particular, was having a stormer with his blent of youthful exuberance and pinpoint distribution. The Babbage Islanders were growing increasingly concerned, escpecially when Saturnino began to hold back on his legendary intensity after an early booking. The speed and fluidity of Krytenia's attack was proving too much for their opponents' ageing defence, and in the end it was Katja Mira who got herself in all sorts of problems, poking a tackle straight into the path of veteran Cameron Davis, who scored a typically clinical finish to put the Aces ahead. The second, meanwhile, came early in the second half. At World Cup LVII, Krytenia were, perhaps, lacking that X-factor to spearhead their attack; they found it, though, from an unlikely source. A Starblaydi who had played in Krytenia for some time, and defected to the KFA the moment the men in white and purple disappeared over the horizon and into the sunset.

His name? Valrauncion.

The elf had adapted quickly to his new colours and team-mates, becoming an almost immediate cult hero. His superb strike, after foxing young Kaitlyn Miller with some trademark fancy footwork, only helped cement his status in the United Provinces. Glen Svoboda, of the famed Svoboda family of Babbage footballers, made it tense for a while, but when Leon Sartelli's whipped free kick was nodded home by Wilson ten minutes from time, the die was cast and the game was up. For the Babbage Islands, the consolation of a third place playoff, a match their opponents had become all too familiar with. For the Krytenians? Dreamland, pure and simple.

THE AFTERMATH
Sadly, it was not to be in the final. Aguazul, who had ended Krytenian dreams in the semis four years prior, would do so again upon the grandest stage to regain the trophy. Krytenian football had reached its zenith; by World Cup LX, the Aces missed the boat entirely and Vázquez García was gone. The Aces qualified twice more after that, but by that point were merely going through the motions, and took a good two decades out of the game entirely after a rather anonymous World Cup LXVII qualifying campaign.

They, and Valrauncion, would be back, of course, to shock the world: and now you know the rest of the story.

#1: It Haperd One Night
#89: You Beat Us, We're Still Better
#637: The Magnificent Seven
#361: What's The Time?
#220: The Smashing Orangey Bit

World Cup 73 - RPing Thread

[03] Where In The World Is Wisdom Tracey? Part 1

Witty Penguins RP #5/6

Who is online

DKI	PLAYER	TIME	EVENT	YTT
0	-- ----	00:00	Start of Match	0
	06 Nye	18:16	BOOKING	YC
	22 O'Doyle	56:00	GOAL	1
SUB	06 Takedashita	61:19	01 Sato
	03 Vellderfenstermacher	67:25	BOOKING	YC
0	-- ----	90:00	Full Time	1