World Cup 73 - RPing Thread

by **The Saint James Islands** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 10:52 am

#omericavotes21: omerican aurentina
the aurentines will be a must-win for the nationals if the socialists are to be beaten

Georgetown — This article is the second in a six-part series exploring the battlegrounds of the upcoming federal election. You can read our first part on Melenchon and the Provence here.

Crossing into the Aurentine cantons is like crossing into a foreign country. The language is different and the people are… odd. Aurentina often seems to have a contrarian streak that runs deeply through its veins, with hopeless petitions for Aurentine independence being one of the most common sights on the Commonwealth’s online petition site.

Nonetheless, the Aurentine Democratic Party, once the most successful ethnic party in Omerican history, has officially been deregistered by Elections Omerica for falling below 500 members and secessionism is not a big force in Aurentine politics these days, as former AEP leader and current National leader Aleksänder Mätjassen will tell you.

The cantons of Asterleis and Vestleis—the two least populated in the entire country—solidly benefit from the four MP minimum imposed by the Basic Law and will be easily sweeped by the Nationals, who form majority governments in both cantons. Alfort, which is governed by a National minority government, will be trickier, but should fall to Mätjassen’s party. The other cantons are trickier, though.

Braadwund, Omerica’s third-least populous canton, is currently governed by Liberals, but should likely be bathed in a sea of National blue come election night unless the Liberals perform exceptionally well. As for Koningsplaas and Kalsden, it is trickier still. Both are governed by the Socialists at the moment, with the former’s government reeling from a CHS scandal that will likely take the wind out of Socialist sails in Koningsplaas’s six electorates. The Socialists will be in contention for the seven electorates of Kalsden, whose Socialist government is generally approved of, but will need to stem Liberal growth throughout the region to avoid handing all of the electorates over to the Nationals.

Aurentina is a region facing conflicting desires. The region has not benefited from the resource boom nearly as much as other places and relies mostly on the service sector and tourism, something that the Nationals are likely to be a boon for. However, the socially conservative policies of the Nationals are likely to be a turn-off in key battlegrounds in Kalsden and Koningsplaas that Aleksänder Mätjassen needs to win to become Prime Minister. If the Liberals can sway voters in these key battlegrounds and can make some inroads into Braadwund and Altfort, John Timms may just pull of the greatest political comeback in Omerican history by putting the Liberals back in contention for election victory.

Inevitably, a recession will benefit Mätjassen’s Nationals immensely. Economic calm will favour John Timms and his Liberals, while the Socialists will clutching at straws here. If Kalsden and Koningsplaas turn National blue, Aleksänder Mätjassen will likely be taking the keys to Rucker’s Hill. If Aurentina turns Liberal gold, John Timms and Staci Laurent will breathe a sigh of relief.

#omericavotes21: urination and recession
former contractor forced to withdraw as candidate, while omerica officially enters recession

Langholm, Silverforce — The Nationals have suffered the first major embarrassment of the 2021 campaign after their candidate for a marginal Silverforce electorate was forced to withdraw after videos showed him urinating in bathtubs and showers.

A video released on YouTube yesterday revealed that the Nationals’ candidate for Langholm Church Stephen Mallard urinated in numerous bathtubs and showers across the Silverforce capital during his career as a contractor, unbeknownst to homeowners. This setback comes after another National candidate in Hackney Limehouse in Philibiscostal was forced to withdraw her candidacy after several racist social media posts surfaced.

Mallard had been featured on a United Counties Network hidden camera programme back in 2014, where producers discovered that he was also urinating into sinks. The National Party has officially announced on Twitter that Mallard is no longer the party candidate for Langholm Church.

“We take all necessary steps to ensure the integrity and propriety of our National candidates,” National campaign manager Peter Caldwell stated in a press release. “We can assure Omericans that neither Stephen Mallard nor Michelle Franklin [former Hackney Limehouse candidate] will be candidates for the National Party in the federal election.”

“This incident should not be considered a reflection of my character or the integrity of my work,” Mallard stated on Facebook. “I regret this will ever fibre of my being and I apologise to anyone who has hired me for this cloud of doubt cast over the work I have done.”

However, the embarrassment for the Nationals may not prove as much of a dent to their election hopes as feared, as Statistics Omerica announced that the Commonwealth has officially entered into recession after two consecutive quarters of economic contraction. The Socialists, who are campaigning mainly on their record of economic growth, will likely see their poll numbers take a hit due to the announcement.

The recession has been pinned on the contraction of natural resource extration and declines in fishing outputs, while the service sector marginally grew in the last quarter after contracting slightly in the first.

“We have seen quite clearly that the Nationals can’t present decent candidates and the Socialists can’t present decent policy,” Liberal leader John Timms, who is seeking to return his party to top-two status after three consecutive third-place finishes, said in a tweet.

for your reading pleasure

World Cup Challenge 73: Pick your qualifiers for Apox-Québec ▶
Omerica drops to fourth in World Cup qualifying after sitting out third matchday ▶
HSOWA 1–2 Holy Empire: Unstoppable force prevails over immovable object ▶
#omericavotes21: Liberals rising in polls as Socialists and Nationals flounder ▶

Turanga ʻAhipula ʻo ʻOmerika
6 Jacques la Rouge Road
Port-Alexandre, Philibiscostal 18-A40
COMMONWEALTH OF OMERICA
Official Press Release - Tuku Katipa Hoi ʻe Pieti

Qualifiers for the Seventy-Third World Cup
Omerica national team line-up vs Armeia (home)
Substitutes
GK - N^o 1: INTAN Petera
GK - N^o 13: Stéphane ROUSSEAU
LD - N^o 2: Jean-Luc CHARPENTIER
CD - N^o 5: Tobias WILMER
CD - N^o 3: Marvin SESSIONS
RD - N^o 4: Victor MASON
CM - N^o 6: Kai EKO
CM - N^o 7: Erik DE WAALD
AM - N^o 8: Uirema MOANA
LF - N^o 9: Neama IOKUA
ST - N^o 11: Jan-Nikläs ROSENKRÄNTS
RF - N^o 10: JEAN-BAPTISTE Couard
Starting eleven
GK - N^o 25: John MARTIN
LD - N^o 14: Martin PALL
CD - N^o 17: Jean-Marie MOLINEAUX
CD - N^o 15: Makara ʻO TOA
RD - N^o 16: Mikäel CHRISTOPHE
CM - N^o 18: William PARNELL
CM - N^o 19: Tömas DE VRIKT
AM - N^o 20: Raia TURI
LF - N^o 21: Red TYLER
ST - N^o 22: John PERCIVAL
RF - N^o 23: Ryan CASSIDY
Omerica’s top scorers
George's Rousseau - 2 goals
Neama Iokua - 1 goal
Tii ʻo Uirema - 1 goal
Casimir Paquet - 1 goal

by **Kandorith** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 11:39 am

Kandorith Stuns Away

Equestrian States 2–2 Kandorith

Group 13                                   Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
1 Equestrian States                       3    2   1   0     9    3   +6     7
2 Augusticinia                            3    2   1   0     7    1   +6     7
3 Kandorith                               2    1   1   0     3    2   +1     4
4 Copper Cuprum                           3    1   1   1     5    8   −3     4
5 Boring Paradise                         2    0   1   1     0    1   −1     1
6 Stvoto Latoli                           3    0   1   2     0    2   −2     1
7 Saaksvala                               2    0   0   2     1    8   −7     0

The fans stood silently and stunned as the match against Equestrian States ended. Never have the fans seen such a performance from their national team. Kandorith is notorious for letting away matches slide, but this time the Red Dragons stand tall and undefeated. Is the Huangzhou team the perfect Kandorese formation and are the fans prepared for what Kandorith can bring to these qualification matches?

To the Kandorese side Equestrian states is a formidable opponent, which is never easily battled by neither the Kandorese side or anyone, but this time Kandorith stunned the away fans; Kandorith got a draw out of yet another beautiful match for the Red Dragons. A two to two draw is a rarity for Kandorith, as mostly against higher teams, the Dragons tend to slip away in the defensive area. This time the roles were reversed, in the dying minutes of the game Madato managed to score an equalizer from a lose ball inside the box; for the fans this was even more amazing and even stunning. The fans were happy with a 2 - 1 loss, as Kandorith fought to the bitter end, but as the ball Madato rocketed towards goal found the back of the net, a silence fell at the away side of the stadium, followed with a very loud roar of disbelief and absolute euphoria. Their favorite team is back in the race, and is looking stronger than ever, The Red Dragons are not showing any mercy.

Ever since Huangzhou took over during the fall of Xí-tiang during the previous World Cup, the Kandorese side have been showing improvements with every match; the players have even been taking these improvements to their morale and skill home to their domestic teams. The Red Dragons are looking more confident, in control and more focused towards goal scoring opportunities and possession than ever before. Huangzhou himself said the team always had it in them, but were afraid to tire themselves out and left too much to chance to eventually advance. He himself has crowned this team to the "Winning Kandorese" as he believes they should make it to the finals easily, without any exception. The results are yet to be seen as Kandorith is a match down on the top two of the group, but there's no doubt they are off to a good start.

The next match for Kandorith will be against Augusticinia at home, where the stadium is already being decorated in the national colors and the fans are awaiting to watch their team perform in spectacular fashion again. Home games are always special for Kandorith, not just because of the majestic stadium, but also because of the fact the Emperor himself attends most of the home matches of the national team. Huanghzhé Stadium is the major home ground for Kandorese national sports in general, but during the football it is the most decorated venue throughout the nation. From the roofs the Kandorese flags will be hanging and the atmosphere in the capital will be at their best; as Kandorith will do their best to be both good hosts and perform well at their own grounds.

by **Burthnas** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 11:42 am

SKYDIVING TO SUCCESS
by: Arnold Bopswagon

The national team's plane and livery.

Minutes before Burthnas' third match began (this time with a team that is more on the same level as Team BUR), the players of today's match boarded the very plane that they landed in Apox with. However, this time, the team isn't leaving. They've planned something spectacular this time around. "Our previous methods pretty much flopped, so this time, we're going wild!" exclaims Uno Hung, "We're gonna skydive into the stadium!" "Skydiving is a brilliant activity that causes a massive adrenaline and dopamine rush," explains Rrump's Hair, who also has a doctorate degree in physiology. "Instead of that heebie-jeebie mumbo jumbo potato wrap we did last time, this time we're sticking to cold hard science to maximize our team efficiency!" says Ronald Rump while shoving beets into the team's mouths. "Hey, at least we're not utterly last Group 15," says Tredecim before boarding into the plane.

by **Semarland** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 11:43 am

Well what a great start this has been!

Obvious sarcasm there. It’s been shit. A 1-0 loss to Bears Armed (they’re a good team to be fair), scraping through 1-0 against Estelar (sorry but we should be getting a few more goals than that) and a 6-0 drubbing from Polar Islandstates. I can’t believe it’s Andreas Jansen, probably one of our best managers in history that’s in charge. I mean, not so long ago the guy had lead us to our first ever World Cup finals and third place in the Trindl Cup Invitational we hosted when we were the second-lowest ranked team in the tournament. It’s crazy. We’ve got the players, they’ve gelled together before…but what’s happening?

To be fair there’s been some quite big changes. No Eirik Malsen and to think that quite soon there won’t be Marc Lygaard or Demba Cisse either is quite worrying, but not in the sense when you look at the amount of talent that is in line. Kwame Nelson and Reiss Claro-Hunt (and his twin Rene in attacking midfield)…when those three get called up. Holy fuck. Heaven. Then people like Marcel Labonne Emmanuel Sambu or the smoother Andre Carlstadt in defensive midfield…Dequane Saint Etienne and Diego Snow on the wings…and to think we haven’t included Tunji Tunde or Demba Cisse if they’re still around? The midfield and strike force is completely laced with talent. Hell, there’s Sehun Otudeko and he’s not even an U15 yet. (Although maybe it is a bit early…). Marcel Thorbourne too. I could go on for hours.

The defence seems fine, ideally in a few years it will be Eiriksson as the veteran full back, Chalobah and someone else, personally I hope it’s Amani Chimbonda but he’s only 17 at the moment, then either Huxley or Oseni at full back. Or Christian Parr/Martin Eriksen at either full-back position. Then don’t even get me started on goalkeepers. Marc Lindholm, who signed for Guayabelense side Alianza FC at the start of the season, Martin Valbuena, Nathan Musendo, Kambe Sincorne-Montpelier, Valentin Courtois, my god there’s too many! It’s usually quite rare for countries to have such a plethora of potential world-class goalkeepers, but we seem to be one of those rare ones of having a splurge of talent between the goalposts.

Not that I’m complaining, of course. We’ve got a growing reputation in football and I think producing young players is one of our key strengths. Of course, nations such as the chain of Sunrise Islands have been more than happy to import talents to their clubs, and we’ve gone on to see some of them develop into some real gems. Not just players too, but coaches, including a few from Krsthaven who went on to take roles with Osarius’ national youth teams. Prestigious.

But if I get to my actual point – our campaign so far…it’s been dreadful. Yeah, yeah, three games in, yeah, whatever. A 1-0 win being your only win is not good and to consider it was against team around 130 places below us…with sincere respect to Estelar but we really should have won that by a few more. Polar Islandstates, in our eyes, is the best team in the world but it was like the team gave up. It’s like they wanted to lose to them.

Maybe it’s team selection? We haven’t seen Dequane Saint Etienne play yet. Nkutu’s great, I mean, but why not give Dequane a go? What’s he here for? Decoration? An extra sub in a training game? Entertainment? Yes, he’s 17, yes, he’s a risk, but isn’t taking risks part and parcel of modern day football in the multiverse? How did you expect Tunde, Marcssen, Huxley, Carlstadt, Adebayo, Jamar fucking Bentgate to all get capped? The average Semar wouldn’t expect Huxley, Carlstadt, Adebayo, Bentgate, Saint Etienne to be capped but look at that! Johan Huxley of all people is the one to replace Eirik Malsen, the original Mr Dependable of Semar football.

Anyway, that concludes my rant. Unless, we lose to Estenia or even DRAW because I just don’t like Estenians. And they don’t like us, so you can’t say the feeling’s not mutual.

Divine Mensah, Staff Writer
Divine Mensah was capped 37 times for Semarland’s national team between 1993 and 2004. Initially a right back, Mensah switched to the left hand side when Eirik Malsen took his place. Mensah also enjoyed a successful club career with FC Kolberg, with spells at Eikborg Club and Orlosport to follow. He managed Orlosport from 2008 to 2015, before taking up a position as FC Kolberg’s assistant manager until 2017. Since then, he is the head coach of Semarland U17 and currently writes for Sportsat.

by **Apox** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 12:03 pm

Groups 11-20 Matchday 4 Cut-off

Mans HYPE is NEXT fam.

by **Schottia** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 1:22 pm

Their Lives

Drinking Games.

#21: G. Corsie, Central Midfielder | wi/ #07: C. Rudden, Left wing-forward

'They're all the same size pal, so just grab the first one that comes to your hand.' One of the other players had been watching Gary Corsie as he rummaged through a large cardboard box full of slightly worn, and very much faded football kits.

Looking up, Gary nodded a polite acknowledgement, however it wasn't the size which was troubling him, rather it was the questionable and unwashed state in which the garments had been left. The one he was currently inspecting was particularly unsavoury, with what could only be described as a gravy stain down the front. He was baffled as to how Stan Osmond actually expected his players to wear these rancid old rags. Sure they played in a pub-league, but they must have had a sense of smell?

'Aye, most of the lads are a bit of the wide side.' Said the player who was getting dressed in front of him. True to form the man had a large beer-belly, covered in enough hair to stuff a pillow case. 'Stan just bought twenty sets of extra large. That'll be alright for you... judging by your...' The man was looking for a polite way to say weight, but since nothing came to his mind, he just left it hanging.

Gary considered disagreeing, but he would only be lying to himself. He was bordering on being over-weight, and worst of all it was now almost noticeable. Extra large would be a bit baggy, but the brutal truth was, it would probably fit okay. The sinking feeling he was subjected to standing here was probably actually mild, in comparison to the way he would feel if he had to ask his club Chatswood for a larger size next season.

Gary lifted one of the shirts up to the light; all in all it wasn't bad. A little bit yellow under the armpits, and a bit frayed at the neck, where it must have been rubbing against the throat of someone with rough stubble. He had a shirt, and one sock, which he could tolerate the smell of; all he needed was one more sock and a pair of shorts not caked in dry mud. This idea was doomed to failure, he could just imagine the look on his new manager Emery Lineker's face if she saw him now. Should he get injured playing in a match for a pub team, the fallout would be cataclysmic. Chatswood played in the Nepharim Premiership, one of the best leagues in the world, if Gary was honest, he wasn't even 100% sure how to play for a pub team.

'Aye, yer gettin' a wee bit doughy!' Said one of the other players, a thickly accented man whom Gary had not yet met. 'Too many pies Corsie.' The whole room laughed at the obvious and tedious joke, having a celebrity in their midst was clearly a source of amusement. 'I'm startin' tae think I could get a game for Schottia.' The man in his late forties slapped his own stomached with both hands, and got another resounding laugh from the rest of Harpooner Bar FC. They had an average age of about thirty-eight, the majority of them were heavy smokers, and one or two had brought a pint into the changing room with them. Others were even helped themselves to cans of lager from a plastic bag, which sat in the middle of the room. All Gary could think to do was smile awkwardly.

'Nah Jimmy...' Said another one of the players. 'Ye need a muckle great beard to do that!' This started another ripple of laughter, Gary's ten centimetres of beard hair again causing its share of hilarity.

Gary never actually knew that this room even existed. Despite frequenting the Harpooner for a number of years, he had been blissfully unaware of its frankly unnecessary existence. Both the walls and floor were covered with the same shiny white ceramic tiles, and looked as if they had been cleaned about as often as the kits. The whole room felt musty damp, and as a result, the kits being stored there, had acquired the same odour. To top everything off, there was an overriding heady aroma of urinal cakes coming from the adjoining toilets, meaning the Gary had been subjected to open sensory warfare.

'Hey hey hey! How do I look?' At that his partner Chloe Rudden burst into the room, arms akimbo, dressed in her Harpooner finest. The shirts (as mentioned) only came in one size, therefore the sixty-kilogram, twenty-year-old had had to tie the bottom of the shirt in a bow around her waist, as it would otherwise be down to her knees. She jumped around on the spot in her odd socks, obviously unable to find a matching pair. There was a chorus of cheers from the players in the team, as Chloe's optimism began to infect them. Not only was she the first female player to play for the pub team, but also she was arguably the best.

'I don't think Stan ever had you in mind Chlo, when he ordered kits in that size.' Gary couldn't help but smile.

'Chloe Rudden left winger, reporting for duty.' She stood to attention, chest out and chin in the air. The Harpooner's kit was white (at one point at least) with purple sleeves, and light green shorts, accompanied by navy blue socks. It wasn't so much a strip as it was a selection of garments pieced together with no rhyme or rhythm.

How had he let her talk him into this? The whole thing was doomed from the outset. He was sure that when the landlord Stan had suggested it, that even he had been joking. The problem was that Chloe had latched onto to the idea and given it a pair of shaky and wholly unnecessary legs. Now as a result, there were two international footballers playing in the Schottic Pubs and Clubs Annual Shield. It was not unheard of for some of the establishments to enlist celebrity customer to take part, even patrons who were retired professionals; but two young players in their prime was a new one.

The event was an all-weekend thing, with a round robin in the morning where the team would play three forty minute matches, and if they progressed they would go through to a round of thirty-two, and sixteen in the afternoon. The following day was the quarterfinals, semis and then the final after lunch. It was a fairly intense day, and considering the fitness level of the average player, unlimited rolling substitutions were required.

'Will we come back to Handon and do this every summer?' Chloe asked Gary as they stood on the patchy school sports field waiting to go on and face The Old Man and Plough. 'I've not been this excited about football in years!' There was a reason Chloe was rarely ever allowed to give interviews, and this comment kind of summed it up. When you had represented your country in the Cup of Harmony, saying that pub football was the highlight of your career was not what fans wanted to hear.

'Lets just see if we get through this in one piece first.' He replied. If Gary struggled to get inspired to play his club, then how was he going to muster enough enthusiasm to perform out here?

'I just love the idea of, y'know, giving something back.' Chloe was still looking around with a smile from ear to ear. All the time people were slowing as they walked past the unmistakable pairing, trying to work out if it was them. Some people were clearly unsure as to whether it was a weird hoax, or if they'd just had too much to drink the night before. 'I've definitely decided, before I retire, I want to go and play for a really small team. Give their fans something to cheer about; I won't even take a wage from them.'

'Well if it's what you believe in, then you should do it.' Gary answered, while looking over his shoulder at the rest of their teammates, all standing with beers in their hands. All he could think about was how much wanted one too.

Just then, a little boy of around eight or nine was the first to break cover. 'Excuse me.' He said touching Chloe on the back. 'Can I please have your autograph?' He seemed a little shy, but very certain, as if a parent had put him up to it.

'Oh my God, of course!' Said Chloe taking his note pad and pen and putting down her scribble with a fun smile above it. Gary had to admit that even his heart was warmed by the exchange, as Chloe asked to whom she should make it out. 'So what team do you support Thomas?' She asked placing friendly hand on his shoulder.

'Handon United.' He answered unsurprisingly.

'Nice...!' Chloe made an impressed face and nodded. Gary had always thought his partner would make a good kids' TV presenter. 'They're a good team! And who's your favourite player at United?'

'Gaston Avelione.' Predictably the best player in the team, and Schottia's most famous footballer. Not much imagine there Thomas - Gary thought to himself.

'Woooow! He is a brilliant player, scores loads of good goals doesn’t he?' Chloe added.

The boy nodded. 'Which team do you support?' He asked catching Chloe a little by surprise.

'Oh me? Eh, well actually I didn't really follow football much when I was a kid, I was more into gymnastics. And when I was really wee, all I wanted to be was an elf!' She leaned in towards Thomas cupping a hand to his ear. 'And don't tell anyone, but I still do...' She placed a finger over her lips and nodded in Gary's direction. 'And definitely don't tell Mister grumpy over there.'

The boy smiled briefly. 'So you don't support a team?' He asked, unable to comprehend anyone not following football.

'Um...' Chloe stuck out her bottom lip, lost for an answer to rectify the situation. 'Well how about the team I play for, North Laithland, I've got to support them huh? Their nickname is the Spiders' She raised her hands, with her fingers outstretched to look like the creepy-crawlies. 'Do you know them? Do you watch the Nepherim Premiership.

The boy still looked at her disappointedly, but he nodded again.

'Gary's family are Port Sebastian fans.' She stood back putting a hand round his shoulders. 'Isn't that right?' Gary nodded and smiled, trying to help.

Thomas looked at him before screwing up his face. 'I hate Port Sebastian!' He spat, actually making Chloe jump a little. 'And I don't like you!' He brandished a finger in Gary's direction, trembling with rage. 'You're rubbish, my dad says you're a lazy sod! I wish you didn't play for Schottia!'

That was probably the most honest analysis of Gary's career that he had heard to date, and while he couldn't disagree, coming from a small boy, the words cut Gary deeply.

---

The incident continued to play on his mind during the Old Man and Plough game, and rather than trying to prove the boy wrong, in true Gary form he let his head go down. Rather than being the star of show, Gary wasn't actually even playing any better than the other players. Other than a thunderous drive from 30-yards out, which went just wide, all he had to show for himself were a few miss placed passes and a lot of grumping and groaning. Chloe on the other hand was having a whale of a time, and seemed to be on a one-woman mission to win the game for her favourite drinking-hole. During the forty-minute match, she scored five goals, helping the side to a 6-2 win. The highlight of her performance was the third goal, where she ran most of the pitch before scoring a Rabona goal from an impossible angle. It wasn't too far off being the best goal that Gary had ever seen in his life.

At the end of the match all Gary could do was scratch his beard in disbelief. All he had ever wanted was a quiet life, yet somehow in the outrageous times we live in, he had been sucked in this surreal vortex. On reflection, it was maybe best if he went to look for a beer.

by **Armeia** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 2:19 pm

A new RP series from the writer that brought you Phantom Pains.
The Isa Tangemen Chronicles Part One: Denial

Being a star was good sometimes, but Isa Tangemen didn't know if she had the mental toughness to handle it. As the Armeians returned to Loftus after the road loss to Omerica, Isa couldn't help but stare at the tabloid papers in the airport, the ones that blamed their loss on her. The headline of the Loftus Post read "ISA WHO?" and the Terrum Globe read "STICK TO MUSIC", a reference to the rap single that Isa had released recently. The most sympathetic paper, the Sudens City Star, read "HOMETOWN HERO COSTS SUPER DRAGONS POINTS".

"Don't mind those," said a voice behind Isa, making her jump. It was the voice of Samantha Leroux, who was a player-coach for the national team after failing to make the cut. She was only twenty, but she had already suffered more injuries than some players near the end of their career. Specifically, concussions, although she had also had a fractured neck a few years ago. "If you think those headlines are harsh, you should have seen the ones when I made Southern drop points in the Regions Cup... By breaking my neck."

Isa was silent, remembering that game. She had been in the terraces, watching as that happened. Samantha had suffered a fractured neck because of a bad challenge for a cross, and Northern Armeia had scored while she was down and the team was playing with 9 players after a red card and the injury. The headlines the next day were brutal, the Loftus press scapegoating Samantha for getting injured while Southern was a man down. "Yeah, this is nothing," Isa said eventually, knowing that the press in Loftus and Terrum was always like this, and that these papers could be much worse.

But one more headline caught her eye, from the Forge Daily. "RANGERS TO LOOK TO PICK UP NATIONAL TEAM KEEPER" it said bellow the main headline, referring to the Forge Rangers expansion team. Isa had been considering considering going home for quite awhile, but seeing her name linked to a club made her think harder about it. She hadn't adjusted well to Abanhfleft, it was too different from home. Too socialist, too, she'd spent six months in the military to fight that kind of thing, and now she was living in a country like that? She missed Sudens City, her hometown. And even though she couldn't believe it, she missed Southeastern, the club she had been at since she was a youth player.

You don't want to go back home, Isa thought as she got on the team bus and sat down next to her girlfriend, Bianka Schraeder. You left because you needed to grow up... You aren't ready to go back. Not at all...

"What's on your mind?" asked Bianka, watching the older keeper mess with her short hair, something that she only did when she was nervous or focusing on something.

"Home," Isa replied, glancing over at Bianka. "Part of me wants to go to Forge, part of me wants to go home to Southeastern, and part of me says I'm not ready to return to Armeia," she added, sighing. "Everybody kept telling me that it would help me grow up if I played abroad, but I think I've regressed since I got here."

"Don't tell anyone I said this, but playing abroad sucks," Bianka said sympathetically. She was a striker for AC Kawajiri, in Kirishima, and even though she had a good first season, she was considering offers from Lionesses to come back to Armeia. "Kirishima is nice, but... It's too different from home, I actually started to miss Camden by the end of the season. They're too centrist also."

Armeia was very different from most countries, leading to culture shock for foreigners playing in Armeia, specifically Western Armeia, and the same was true for Armeians moving abroad. "I might as well see what offers are out there," Isa said, taking out her phone and sending a text to her agent, asking for the list of bids for her. It wasn't long before she received a text back with a list of teams: Forge Rangers, Cruz Blanca, Lionesses, Northeastern, AFC Center City, and Vandals. Southeastern was surprisingly absent from that list.

At Forge Rangers or Cruz Blanca she would be in the spotlight, for sure. And she wasn't sure if she could handle that, she was having a hard enough time as it is just handling being the national team starting keeper. "Don't make any moves you aren't sure about, you know," warned Bianka. "Like when I left Loftus College..."

"Yeah I know," Isa replied, closing her eyes and leaning back. "I have too many regrets, I'm not ready to go back home now...That might change later."

by **Szavoda** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 2:48 pm

continued from here

The first two days on operation had been relatively uneventful, driving through largely empty areas of the Szavda heartland. Their accommodation was mostly in the residences of friendly business associates or Harther buildings itself. Most of the places were surrounded by barbed wire and looked almost like fortresses, with shuttered windows and thick concrete reinforcement. Most of the work done had been relatively simple, forming perimeters and doing close security work with the Harther team whilst they surveyed their mines and refineries.

The weather had begun to close in as the week progressed, with a continuous sheet of grey cloud often producing bouts of heavy rain. The third night was in the small village which had grown up around the largest diamond mine in the region, operated by Harther, and employed over 8,000 Szavda workers, under the yoke of 35 Euran Upper Managers – compared to just one Szavda, and he had worked in Eura for 30 years. The building was at the far end of the village, down by the river, behind a wrought-iron gate and fence, with its third-floor windows covered by cork-boarding. Molly exited the lead vehicle and unbolted the gate, allowing the convoy to enter the compound. The four cars parked in a row outside the building, and the Clyne team performed their normal post-arrival sweep of the area – whilst the compound was private, it was largely unoccupied for most of the year, so it could well have fallen into disrepair.

Katarina had drifted off with Landen, the pair stalking round the perimeter fence, idly checking the integrity of its chain-links. Landen had a strange, mysterious allure to him, his hardened grey eyes hiding an endlessly complex past. He said little, speaking only when spoken to or when noting something official. But beneath a steely exterior, Katarina could sense, was someone a bit kinder and more welcoming, it just required a bit of coaxing. He was a man of average height, but well-built, as a result of the OFI’s famed ‘Blitz’ fitness programme, supposedly. He had straw-coloured hair, neatly combed to one side, and had strong facial features. He walked on the outside of the pair as they patrolled the edge of the compound, occasionally poking the chain-link fence with his hand or with the barrel of his assault rifle. Whenever he found a damaged spot, he radioed through to a technician who would get on it before nightfall.

Katarina had heard briefly about Landen’s supposed past, in the OFI, working the drug rings in Szavoda. She figured, as a Szavda, she might be able to pry a little more information about the topic which so intrigued everyone else. She slung her assault rifle onto her back and retrieved a packet of gum from her pocket and fed a piece into her mouth. She then pushed a lock of hair behind her ear and broached the subject.

“So, Landen, a lot of the guys in the team say you worked for the OFI on the drug ring in Szavoda. Was that the case?”
Landen flicked a stone away off his boot and smiled wearily at Katarina. “You know you’re not the first person to ask me that?”
“So I gathered”
“I did a lot of stuff I’m not proud of. You’ll understand that I’m never too keen to share.”
“Perhaps I’ll be able to make sense of it, you know, grasp the logic of making tough decisions, because I’m a Szavda, I know what the city hardships were like.”

This was a lie, Katarina had been raised in the rural outskirts of Kreceva, and had a relatively comfortable upbringing compared to others, but that wouldn't get Landen talking.

“Yeah, it’s true; I worked for four years for the OFI. A large majority of that time we spent in Szavoda. There were 6 of us, in total, working in the ring, under the codename of ‘Treetop’. I probably shouldn't be telling you this, but it doesn't really matter, the rest of the operatives are dead.”

Katarina stiffened internally but said nothing as he continued. “I was just 22 when I was first deployed. I was fast tracked, they saw potential. Don’t know what though; perhaps it was ability to not let my emotions get the better of me in the field. I think I'm technically a psychopath. Two of us from ‘Treetop’ were inserted in the Kovinj Quarter Gang, you’ve probably heard of them. We started from the bottom, working our way up into the trust of the ring-leader, Josef Kirkevic.”

Kirkevic was a notorious figure in Szavoda. He practically ran the Southern Bank of the Marzecjza River in Nevograd.

“If I remember correctly, wasn’t he killed in a firefight with the cops?” Katarina recalled from her memory.
“That’s right. My partner had failed to meet a rendezvous one night, so I was told to hit the wind. His body was found three days later in the river. Our surveillance van was shot at and one operative bled out in an alley whilst they waited for an ambulance. I acted against orders and decided I had to get Kirkevic otherwise it would never end. I phoned in the Szavda cops, before calling the OFI and said I was going to get him at a drug hand-off in a warehouse that night. I went in with two 9mm and 50 armed cops waiting on me. The rest of ‘Treetop’ arrived during the firefight with Kirkevic’s goons. I saw three more of them die during that fight, I suppose it was my fault, dragging them after my reckless ass, but I felt it needed to be done. The OFI decided they were done with me and let me loose that evening. Had to get my own way back across the border. Got by for a few years but I couldn’t function in regular society. I changed my name, did a few jobs for organised crime units, joined up with Clyne after the milk round…”

“The milk round?”
“Yeah, silly phrase. A number of PMCs like to recruit from criminal syndicates, we make good fighters, limited conscience and the like. It’s kind of an unofficial deal between us and the authorities; we lure the most hardened criminal operatives from various organisations throughout Eura – and that’s what happened to me.”

“Really? I never would have put you down as a criminal.”
“Guess I’m reformed, then.”
“How come you were never arrested?”
“I dunno. I guess we trod the fine line between illegality and legality. I wasn’t an out and out criminal really, just the middle-man. I was a getaway driver, an anonymous gun for most of it. That’s what suited me about Clyne – I could just be in the background with my rifle and do my job – no serious responsibility, just a nice pay check. The Euran police like to pride themselves on their corruption-free record, and nowadays, its largely true, but when I was there we had a fair few officers in our pocket. It made things a little easier. I was never party to the more hard-core stuff – unless you were directly involved, they liked to keep you in the dark. There was a lot of riding shotgun in vans with suspicious contents, believe you me.”

Katarina smiled, she was surprised by Landen’s openness, considering how resistant he had seemed before and what the others had said. Landen looked at Katarina, his grey eyes impenetrable. She sensed there was more, but she’d got enough and turned the subject. They continued their walk round the perimeter of the compound, its scrubby earth littered with hard rubbish. The fence went right up to the streets of the village, allowing the pair a line-of-sight down to the village’s church. A group of children scampered down the road, one of them turning to blink briefly at Katarina and Landen. Katarina waved warmly back.

“Did you grow up like this?”

“Kind of. I lived on the outskirts of Kreceva, my mum was a nurse, so she reeled in a decent salary and we lived in a nice enough apartment. My brother joined the army at 16, and he’s 8 years older than me. The cities in Szavoda tend to be a bit more developed than the country, so we had schools and shops and hospitals – mostly funded by you lot – although my education was nothing special. I got into University to read Szavda Literature, did a lot of rowing, had a lot of boyfriends. Left with a bullshit degree and applied to Special Defence.”

“Many routes to the same destination.”
“Exactly.”

The two finished their sweep and returned to the building, with the rest of the Clyne team now firmly bedded in. A rota had been pinned to a nearby noticeboard in the kitchen and Katarina examined it – she’d be on perimeter patrol from 1am to 5am. She shivered in unpleasant anticipation; she was terrible at late nights – or was it an early start?

Nights in rural Szavoda are unlike anything that you can experience in Eura, in that they are almost completely silent. It’s almost as a blanket was thrown over the countryside, and this eerie silence never failed to affect Katarina, who stepped outside into the humid night air shortly after 1am, one hand on her rifle stock and the other firmly round a mug of coffee. The only sounds were her boots on the gravel surface, but that soon left her as she stepped onto the grass round the perimeter. There was a few lights strung up on the fence, but large areas were left in darkness, away from the domestic glow of the house. She retrieved a torch from her pack and flicked it on and clipped it onto her rifle. She offered a cursory sweep into the darkness and saw nothing, so kept walking, keeping close to the fence.

Her radio crackled, breaking the silence. “Anything Kat?”
“Negative, pretty empty out here.”
“Roger that, give us a shout if you see anything.”
“Will do.”

She looped the perimeter twice and was half way through the third when a snapping of twigs somewhere towards the centre of the large scrubland section to the left of the building. She pointed her rifle in the direction of the noise, throwing light rays across the scrub. She saw nothing, and stalked quietly towards the centre. She swept the area numerous times with her rifle, and thought she saw movement, but convinced herself it was her imagination.

Suddenly, a great orange light filled the sky. She turned in a flash towards the house, whose flank was now engulfed in flames, it’s acrid smoke the tell-tale sign of one thing – an improvised Molotov cocktail. She felt for her radio but movement out of the corner of her eye took away her attention. She threw down her rifle, after snapping off the torch and followed. Racing into the darkness, she caught the shape of a figure disappearing into the night. She couldn't make out anything else, but continued her pursuit across the grass. She surprised herself with her ability to close the distance between them, and several yards before the fence, she threw herself at the figure, grasping at a pair of legs as she fell. Although she’d never played the sport, she’d watched enough rugby to understand how to execute a tackle, and did so to perfection here, wrapping her arms around the assailant’s ankles and bringing them crashing to the earth. Katarina then withdrew her pistol and shimmied on top of the arsonist, pinning them to the ground. They struggled for a second, before she barked out in a furious tone.

“Move again and I’ll blow your fucking head off.”

The message got through and the arsonist stopped struggling, allowing Katarina to retrieve her torch, and she shone it in the face of the attacker. She inhaled sharply. Staring back at her, etched with terror, were the eyes of a child, no more than 15. She dropped her pistol before regaining her composure and reaching for her radio. Meanwhile the child started to chatter away in terrified and broken Euran – assuming Katarina was of that nationality.

“Please…please…please, don’t hurt me; I just do what they tell me. Please…please…” He managed to say before sinking into a trail of cries and sobs. Katarina’s radioed talked away frantically, but she didn't report in.

“I'm a Szavda.” She spoke, maintaining her calm. Inside her conscience clashed. The boy switched to his native tongue.
“Please, I’m only under orders. It’s not my fault, don’t hurt me. The men in the village, they told me to do this. I’m innocent.”

The flames blazed in the distance whilst Katarina’s mind ticked over. She never did quite understand why she did what she did next. She moved off the boy and whispered in urgent Szavda.

“Get out of here, whilst you've got the chance.”

The boy seemed confused. He stammered, trying to articulate something, but Katarina hurried him. “Go!” she emphasised “quick!”
The boy needed no second invitation, and scrambled to his feet and fled through some unseen hole in the fence. Only then did Katarina reach to her radio. Molly immediately responded.

“Katarina, did you see anyone? What’s going on out there?”

Katarina paused for a second before replying.

“I don’t know, I didn't see anything.”

by **Gim** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 2:56 pm

WATV - Monday ~ Sunday 8:30-9:00

Host: Jo Jin Ri

Camera is at an aerial view of the studio with Anchorwoman Jo Jin Ri in the center of the studio.

"Hello. I'm Jo Jin Ri of WATV 8 Sports News. Gimian players have had an increase morale after having a draw against the No.1-ranked Pasarga. However, will they continue the undefeated round robin streak against the highly offensive Greater Watford? We'll see."

Camera turns to Gimians and Greater Watfordians playing football.

"Forward Gong Il Woo is benched for today's game and he is replaced by a 23-year-old Kang Sang Yoon. And 13th minute. Kang Sang Yoon takes a long, volley shot from just outside the penalty zone of Greater Watford. The shot is high, past the goalkeeper, but hits the post! Gim almost had a 1-0 lead!"

Camera turns to Greater Watfordians attacking in the Gimian zone.

"56th minute. Watfordian forward enters the penalty zone from the left side. While dribbling the ball, he puts too much distance between his foot and the ball. Gimian defenseman Kim Dong Jin makes a slide to keep the ball out of the penalty zone. The ball gets back to the forward and he shoots, but Kim Dong Jin blocks the shot with his back(0:19). Kim Dong Jin with stellar defensive plays. This season of the World Cup has greatly improved his defensive prowess. I wonder if any team would be willing to acquire him to play in their regional leagues."

Camera turns to Greater Watfordians attacking in the Gimian zone once again.

"69th minute. Watford attacks from the right side of the Gimian penalty zone. The Watfordian forward makes a cross, but the cross is blocked by Kim Dong Jin. Had it not been for Kim, the game would have been 3-0 in favour of Greater Watford, at least."

Camera turns to Greater Watfordians attacking in the Gimian zone once again.

"90th minute. Three minutes of stoppage time. Watford is pressuring again. Son Kyu Jin, another Gimian defenseman, passes the ball back to the goalkeeper Lim Dong Yeop. Lim kicks the ball straight to a Watfordian forward. No defenseman in front of him, one-on-one against the goalkeeper. The forward shoots high, past the goalkeeper, and the ball hits the crossbar and stays out! However, whoa, whoa, wait a minute. That is called a goal. Outrageous. Gimian players discuss this issue with the referee, but the referee is ignoring them. 1-0 Greater Watford on a shot that went off the post and out. The Gimian bench clears for fear of a fierce argument being generated between the Gimian players and the referee. Greater Watfordians clear the bench, too. Unfortunately, the ruling stands, and Gimians, I think, will try to appeal the call. We will get you up-to-date on that, as soon as news about it is heard. For now, the final score is Greater Watford 1 - Gim 0."

by **Gregoryisgodistan** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 3:28 pm

It was a glorious day for soccer at Lord Almighty Gregory National Stadium. And indeed, this was The Border War, and a World Cup Qualifier to boot. It was sure to be a big game. And first, it was time for the national anthems. But Gregoryisgodistan had a special surprise in store for the Diablos. Instead of playing the real Guayabalense national anthem, they played a parody anthem from a movie. As soon as the Guayabalense in attendance realized what was happening, they booed loudly, but the sound engineer just turned up the volume to drown them out.

Guayabal, dumbest country in the world
May our ugly flag forever be unfurled
Guayabal number one exporter of stupidity
All other countries have inferior stupidity
Guayabal home of Dumbo Sewage Hole
Its length 30 meters and its width 10 meters
Sewage filter system is a marvel to behold
It gets into our water and makes us really dumb
Guayabal, Guayabal you very dumb place
From the seas up on the coast to western fence of Gregland
Guayabal hates the Gregoryisgodistan
Because we are all heathens with dumb in our brain
Guayabal industry worst in the world
We invented dumbness and trouser hat
Guayabal prostitutes cleanest in Group 16
Except of course for Jeruselem
Guayabal Guayabal you very dumb place
From the seas up on the coast to western fence of Gregland
Come chop the head off of our dumb Queen Margaret
The very stupid lady who smells like a fish

After this, the Gregoryisgodistani fans applauded and laughed hysterically while the Guayabalense fans booed. Then it was time for the Gregoryisgodistani anthem, which the fans sang loudly and proudly to in order to drown out the Guaya booing while showing their love of the Lord.

You are our God, you are our Lord
Lord Almighty Gregory
You kill the heathens by the sword
Lord Almighty Gregory
We worship you unto the core
We will love you forevermore
You kill the fools in holy war
Lord Almighty Gregory

Hark to the Lord and his appeal
Lord Almighty Gregory
We worship you with all our zeal
Lord Almighty Gregory
You are our God, you do reveal
Before you, we pray and kneel
You stab the heathens in the heel
Lord Almighty Gregory

You are our God, in you we trust
Lord Almighty Gregory
You holy sword shall never rust
Lord Almighty Gregory
You turn Hicanans all to dust
You are kind and always just
Worship you, we must! We must!
Lord Almighty Gregory

You give us prune juice and free gruel
Lord Almighty Gregory
Those who don’t love you are all fools
Lord Almighty Gregory
You’re always generous, not cruel
You kill the Sanctii in a duel
You are our God and you do rule
Lord Almighty Gregory

You lead our country brave and strong
Lord Almighty Gregory
We bow and praise you all day long
Lord Almighty Gregory
You’re always right, you’re never wrong
And so we sing our favorite song
And if you love him, sing along
Lord Almighty Gregory

You shoot the heathens in the head
Lord Almighty Gregory
And pretty soon they’ll all be dead
Lord Almighty Gregory
We worship you from dawn till bed
And raise our flag, gold, black and red
With gruel and prune juice we are fed
Lord Almighty Gregory

We praise you and we worship you
Lord Almighty Gregory
To you we all remain so true
Lord Almighty Gregory
The Church of Saintland has no clue
That to you, all praise is due
And you never take a poo
Lord Almighty Gregory

You will not yield to heathen clowns
Lord Almighty Gregory
You will destroy the Sanctii crown
Lord Almighty Gregory
All our enemies go down
From Apox to St. Petrus town
And Llamaland will wear a frown
Lord Almighty Gregory

Sound the trumpet, play the drum
Lord Almighty Gregory
Those who don’t praise you are so dumb
Lord Almighty Gregory
The guns we’ll blast, the harps we’ll strum
Hurrah! We’ll kill the heathen scum!
They’ll die! They’ll burn! We’ll come! We’ll come!
Lord Almighty Gregory

At the conclusion of the anthem, the Guayabalense continued to boo and chant insulting taunts to the Gregoryisgodistanis. This enranged starting centerback Enemy Crusher Fatty Footy so much that he ran into the stands and crushed a few Guayabalense fans to death before being restrained and red carded by the referee. Now Gregoryisgodistan would have to play the entire match with ten men, but it was totally worth it to live up to the last verse of the anthem and kill the heathen scum.

The match started off with a bang, figuratively speaking (more on literal bangs later), as Arbol Saucedo scored a goal in the second minute, provoking the Gregoryisgodistani fans into a fit of anger. They started chanting "DEATH TO GUAYA" at the top of their lungs while throwing glass bottles of prune juice and gruel into the Guayabalense section, hitting, bruising and cutting dozens if not hundreds of fans, though none seriously enough to require treatment, so we don't have an exact count. This would continue throughout the game and was glorious and holy of them.

The fans would just get angrier in the ninth minute as Rodolfo Zelaya made it 2-0 for the visitors. This provoked Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Death to San Jose Guayabal enough to try to tackle Zelaya football style (real football, not what people who don't speak proper English call football) and was promptly red carded by the referee. This brought Gregoryisgodistan down to nine, though Zelaya was given a yellow for retaliating by shoving Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Death to San Jose Guayabal. Ordinarily shoving another player to the turf would be a straight red, but clearly Zelaya was provoked. So he escaped with a yellow.

Things were then pretty silent until halftime other than fighting in the stands. Then it was time for the Slaves R Us Leaders Race, featuring a very special, one-time only Queen Margaret I character joining costumed versions of Lord Almighty Gregory, Shop Owner, Reino Kulseth, and King Petrus XX. The Queen and the Lord quickly left everyone behind by distracting them with a ticket booth giving away free tickets to the return leg in San Jose Guayabal. While the three of them waited for the non-existent ticket attendant to return, Lord Almighty Gregory and Queen Margaret ran away. Eventually, on the home stretch, Queen Margaret I pulled ahead, even improvising by grabbing a Guayabalense flag from an actual fan in the stands. But then the amazing happened - Lord Almighty Gregory pulled a gun from his pocket and shot Margaret in the back three times, killing her. He then jumped over her dead body and crossed the finish line in first place, then posed for pictures while stomping on the body. Although nobody was really hurt as it was all a show, the "Queen" was nonetheless carried off in a body bag for "realism." Seeing their "Queen" killed on the field infuriated the Guayabalense, even if they knew it wasn't for real, and they proceeded to throw items and vileness onto the field and at the Gregoryisgodistanis. The Gregoryisgodistanis retaliated by throwing rocks into the Guayabalense seats and also setting the gross stuff on fire and throwing it right back. 50 Guayabalense and 66 Gregoryisgodistanis were injured seriously enough to require treatment, while authorities estimate hundreds more on each side received minor cuts or bruises and did not need any treatment.

In the 58th minute, Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Xylocrap Notatypo was breaking forward when Meyson Salume took him down from behind and received a yellow. Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Xylocrap Notatypo shoved Salume to the ground in return and also received a yellow. Salume shoved him back and got his second yellow and was sent off to a standing ovation. However, this enraged one drunk Guayabalense fan who tried to run onto the field and attack Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Xylocrap Notatypo as well as the ref. He was pursued by a Gregoryisgodistani Police officer who shot him in the head, killing him, then proceeded to litter his dead body with more bullet holes as the fans looked on before carrying the dead body off the field.

Come the 75th minute, Sean Fraser scored on a counterattack to make it 3-0 and this really enraged the Gregoryisgodistani fans, who set some of the Guayabalense seats on fire, forcing an evacuation. This means that Guayabalense fans were crammed into a tighter area, but fortunately were further away from the Gregoryisgodistanis with a raging fire in between them. It seemed unlikely any more violence would take place in the stands.

In the 83rd minute, Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Xylocrap Notatypo broke free of his defender and scored a goal to cut the lead to 3-1, but received his second yellow for excessive celebration and was sent off. This would have made it 10-on-8, except that Mattías Passarelli tried a football-style tackle on the forward and was himself sent off.

The next seven minutes plus stoppage were played without incident, and Guayabalense heathens won. As promised, this meant it was time to literally fire Horse Beater KFIU9140. He was set on fire, then loaded into a cannon and fired into the Guayabalense fans section. A few more of them were injured, though none seriously, and they then proceeded to beat Horse Beater KFIU9140 to death while he was on fire, which is exactly what he deserved for shaming the nation. So none of them were charged. A short while later, the Gregoryisgodistani Soccer Federation announced that assistant coach Cheese Police PX010A0ZX was named interim head coach, to be reevaluated at the end of World Cup 73 or the Cup of Harmony. No new assistant was named.

by **Acronius** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 3:30 pm

Their First Three Points
Acronius B inches out Transpadana in 3-2 thriller
James E. Sudlow (@SudlowUP)
^{10/18/2015, 13:19 | Lionsgate, Acronius}

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ACRONIUS 3 - 2 ELECTRUM

Acronius - 4-3-2-1
GK - Philip Abraham
LB - Lupe Andersen
LCB - Radley Montague
RCB - Fabian Royce
RB - Elias Parsons
LM - Rigby Cromwell
CDM - Alexis Lestrange
RM - Arturo Santiago
CAM - Rolan Porcher
LF - Floyd Christmas
RF - Saul Vesper

Transpadana - 4-4-2
GK - Goalkeeper
LB - Full Left-Back
LCB - Center L. Back
RCB - Center R. Back
RB - Full Right-Back
LM - Left Midfielder
LCM - Center L. Midfielder
RCM - Center R. Midfielder
RM - Right Midfielder
LF - Left Forward
RF - Right Forward

Goalscorers
Santiago - '23
Christmas - '60
Vesper - '88
L. Forward - '45+1
R. Forward - '77 (pen.)

Yes, it is true that most of us would have expected Acronius B to beat group minnows Transpadana by a tad more than just a measly one-goal difference - but a win is still a win no matter its size, and the three points this win has awarded the Free Union has boosted the side from 5th position to 3rd position in Group 8. The Blue Boys are now the only side in Group 8 to be in the top half of the table while only having played two matches - Electrum (1st), Lymantatia (2nd), and Port Christopher (4th), all haven't had their bye day yet. This provides the Acronians with an advantage which may come in handy for team morale later on. The game against Transpadana was played under a rainstorm typical to post-summer Acronius, and Union Park, the national stadium of the Free Union, was enjoying a roaring full house as the Toussaint vacations of late October kicked off, meaning flocks of youngsters freckled the crowds, cheering on the Blue Boys for their first home game in the World Cup 73 Qualifiers.

Rain didn't seem to affect the crowds much, both the Acronian and the Transpadanan fans seemed to be familiar with this amount of this kind of weather, but it was a whole different story on the pitch. As soon as the referee blew the whistle, sloppy play dominated the game - the ball control all 22 players were using resembled that of third grade children in the schoolyard during recess, as Acronians and Transpadanans left and right slipped and tripped on the wet grass. Possession was flung around between the two sides during the early stages of the match, but the first twenty minutes saw a total of twelve attempts on goal in total, which surely kept the crowds entertained. The 4-4-2 diamond formation Acronius B was using greatly resembled the 4-3-3 Acronius A used against Electrum back on matchday one - the diamond in the center of the formation, formed by Rigby Cromwell, Alexis Lestrange, Arturo Santiago, and Rolan Porcher, more or less controlled the center of the park and dictated the tempo of the game.

The Acronians drew first blood in the 23rd minute, when a goal from Arturo Santiago put the team one goal up, opening the scoreline. An understandably-poor (given the weather) tackle on the part of the Transpadanan left-back gave Acronius a free kick from the corner of the box. One would have expected Floyd Christmas or Rolan Porcher to take the kick, but instead, it was Arturo Santiago, a starting midfielder on the national side, who made his way up to the ball. In an incredible shred of luck, what he said was meant to be a cross in a post-match interview got caught in a gust of wind complimenting the rainstorm, turning its direction from Saul Vesper to the top-right corner of the goal. The ball was far from the fingertips of Transpadana's goalkeeper, who splat down in the mud as Santiago ran off to celebrate. 1-0 for the Acronians in the 23rd minute.

Despite the early goal, there was plenty of time for the Transpadanans to equalize, and they knew it. Even though the Acronian diamond retained possession of the ball during the rest of the first half, the equalizer did in fact come, and it was quite controversial indeed. Rigby Cromwell was toying around with the ball, lurking around the half-line, when an attempted cross of his was blocked - by the arm - of a Transpadanan player. The ball consequently flew back to the Acronian box where a Transpadanan player, who was found to be clearly offside in a post-match investigation, who slotted the ball into the back of the net, past Philip Abraham. And that's not even mentioning the fact the goal came thirty seconds after stoppage time should have ended. Raging complaints began pouring in from the Acronian players on the pitch. Despite this, the referee ruled the goal legal, and waved off the amalgam of players. The score was 1-1 at the end of the first half.

The tension in the match continued after the break, as both sides of the game fought for possession of the ball under the pouring rain. Visibility worsened on the pitch, obscuring many players' abilities, but that didn't prevent the game's third goal from happening. The ball was being played between the Acronian midfield diamond once more, trudging along the mud as it skidded through the water. After building up the play, Rigby Cromwell sent the ball up to Rolan Porcher, who consequently sent the ball up to 32-year old evergreen Floyd Christmas, one of the few on the pitch who actually was capable of controlling the ball under the storm. Outmaneuvering a Transpadanan center-back, Christmas lifted the ball and quite viscously slammed his foot into the texture of the muddy sphere, sending it straight into the net before the goalkeeper even knew Christmas had entered the box. The score was now 2-1 in favor of the Acronius, with just under forty minutes left on the clock.

The usual trifling business went on in the midfield for the next fifteen minutes, as the storm above raged on. As the 75 minute mark passed, the Transpadanans became more and more desperate for an equalizer. And, yet again, luck shined upon them - they scored a second equalizer, and it wasn't any less controversial than their first one. A Transpadanan corner kick was taken, crossed into the center of the Acronian box - first seemingly curving out of bounds (but then back in), then hitting the arm of a Transpadanan striker before casually plopping down into the net. Most of the crowd, as well as the players on the field were expecting the ref to stop play and accord a free kick to the Acronians for the hand, but no - the goal was given.

Beyond infuriated, the Acronians, knowing that complaining wouldn't help them, instead invested twice their effort into the final ten minutes of the match. Their effort did indeed pay off - after eight minutes of nerve-wracking non-nonsense play by the Acronians allowed the lethal 'Six-Yard-Shark', Saul Vesper, to shine. For once, the midfield diamond didn't actually do anything to contribute to the goal. Instead, this time, it was left back Lupe Andersen who surged up the surprisingly unoccupied left flank. Despite the fact that, under regular circumstances, he never really should have gone past his box's dome, Andersen possessed the agility of a nimble false 9, as he navigated his way through the Transpadanan defensive labyrinth, penetrating into the box. Considering he put around eighty yards behind him in about thirty seconds, most expected the Acronian to score - but he opted to sneak a pass to a patient and unmarked Saul Vesper, who couldn't, an for the record, didn't fail to put the ball in the back of the net.

The Free Union's next game will be against Port Christopher, away. Also known as the Sea Lions are major contenders and dark horses of Group 8, and might just prove to be a huge threat to Acronius C on matchday four. Currently sitting at 121st position internationally, Port Christopher was capable of overcoming Lymantatia and holding group giants Legalese off to a 3-3 draw, but are coming of a 2-0 loss at the hands of Electrum, bringing themselves to fourth position in Group 8. Acronius C will be playing the Sea Lions at the Willox Street Stadium in Port Christopher - and we are expecting a draw or a loss against this formidable side, despite the likes of original Blue Boys Lewis Graves and Eddie Allison, as well as national team substitute Artem Karlenko.

Man of the Match: Arturo Santiago

While it is true that nobody - Acronian or Transpadanan (or the referee, for that matter) - performed exceptionally well during the game, Arturo Santiago takes the cake for Man of the Match for the solidarity he showed, despite the horrendous weather conditions and the constant frustration all the Acronians on the pitch felt throughout the match. Santiago was one of the eleven original Blue Boys - originally a right flank midfielder who served as a transport hub for passed between defense/midfield to the offense. Santiago's spectacular free kick goal really lifted the game off the ground, and we think that he will be a solid pick for the next Blue Boys.

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521 comments

Lee Mons · 15 minutes ago
Ugh. There's no way we can beat Port Christopher.

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BaFeRi · 2 hours ago
C'MON!! WE CAN DO THIS GUYS!!

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Saxophoneplayer · 3 hours ago
I'm not even sure as to how people even scored during that match.

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by **San Llera** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 4:00 pm

The Player Bracket

Hello again! We had a thrilling day yesterday at the player bracket, as we contested the first round of match ups. Now, we are off to the round of 64, and we will get the chance to examine the likes of Laborious Hawk, Valrauncion, Craig Sinclair, and many others. Shall we begin? The following match ups will take place:

And the following is those match ups taking place:

- Pasarga (1) vs (65) Banguela -

Players: CM Csaszar Mor (Pasarga) vs ST Za Vidigal (Banguela)
Analysis: Banguela are a very promising up-and-coming nation and they will surely thrive in the years to come. Unfortunately for them, Za Vidigal won't be playing soccer in those days, and he is stuck in the present. Vidigal is a talent, but does not come even close matching up to the best player on the best team. Csaszar Mor, the Pasargan captain who helped them lift the World Cup two years back, has way too much class.
Winner: Easily Mor.

- Eura (2) vs (63) Gim -

Players: CAM Craig Sinclair (Eura) vs DEF Dong Jin Kim (Gim)
Analysis: On one side, you have Eura's Craig Sinclair, a transcendent player who is one of the best currently playing this sport. On the other side, you have Dong Jin Kim, who would be Gim's only hope in containing Sinclair. Jin is by no means a bad player, but Sinclair is one of the best ever, a goalscoring machine who can do a lot besides score.
Winner: Craig Sinclair wins, probably not for the first time.

- Nephara (3) vs (67) Burthnas -

Players: CM Elaine Ashdown (Nephara) vs ST Buffalo Elk (Burthnas)
Analysis: Ah, Buffalo Elk. You were fun during your time in this tournament. You dazzled us with your buffalo strength and elk swiftness, you perplexed us with your serious drug problem. Alas, your time has come to an end. You've been faced with a Nepharim midfielder with your athleticism but also extraordinary technique.
Winner: Elaine Asdown is way too much for Buffalo Elk.

- The Holy Empire (4) vs (61) Thaldor -

Players: MID Michael Monomacho (The Holy Empire) vs ST Jakub Svoboda (Thaldor
Analysis: As tempting as it was to select The Holy Empire's coach Juan Tzimisces as their best player, we resisted and settled for their captain, Michael Monomacho. And Monomacho proved to be too good for the diminutive Thaldorian striker, cruising to the next round mostly on the basis that he is the best player on one of the best teams.
Winner: Monomacho advances.

- Osarius (5) vs (69) Copper Cuprum -

Players: GK Efrain Suarez (Osarius) vs CM Sutalen Desoka (Copper Cuprum)
Analysis: It was very difficult selection an Osarian for this tournament, but they would regardless be better than Desoka. Not to take away from the Copper Cuprum center-mid, who is a fine player, but Osarius and Efrain Suarez are simply on another level. Suarez is a staple between the posts under Azarai Robinson, and is one of the better goalkeepers in the game.
Winner: And easy pick, it is Suarez.

- Audioslavia (6) vs (59) New Gelderland-

Players: Everything Aitor Jovellanos vs CM Louis Rhodes (New Gelderland)
Analysis: Our selection from a balanced Audioslavia squad was Aitor Jovellanos, who plays at pretty much any position. Then there's New Gelderlish Louis Rhodes, who only plays at one position, but is pretty good at it. Unfortunately, not good enough - the much higher-seeded Jovellanos just has too much class.
Winner: Jovellanos with the win.

- Free Republics (7) vs (58) Associated Godlands -

Players: ST Kyle Bolton (Free Republics) vs CAM The Lord and Savior Jesus Christ (Associated Godlands)
Analysis: Here we arrive at a dilemma: Bolton is very good, yet his statistics are nowhere near those of the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ of Associated Godlands. How much of a bonus should we give Bolton for being on the better team (by a lot)? If they were switched, what would happen?
Winner: In the end, you can't deny Jesus's scoring record. The Lord and Savior Jesus Christ wins.

- Valanora (8) vs (72) Freedom Utopia 100 -

Players: MID Laborious Hawk (Valanora) vs ST Harry Sutherlin (Freedom Utopia 100)
Analysis: Laborious Hawk of Valanora is quite possible the greatest player of all time. Harry Sutherlin of Freedom Utopia 100 is not a bad striker, but is still miles below the elf.
Winner: Not even close. Laborious Hawk.

- Farfadillis (9) vs (73) Googolsia-

Players: ST Risko Kai (Farfadillis) vs RM Filip Sovany (Googolsia)
Analysis: Sovany of Googolsia is a speedy winger who can cross the ball. Risko is 10 times faster, 10 times better at crossing, and has nearly unrivaled instincts. And he's also really good at a lot of other things. Sovany had a nice run, but it's over.
Winner: Risko Kai advances.

- Saintland (10) vs (55) Port Christopher -

Players: CB Larina Tanicius (Saintland) vs CM Diego Bandos (Port Christopher)
Analysis: This one is close. Tanicius represents Saintland, ranked tenth in the world, but she is very unproven on the international stage, and it remains to be seen whether Feministvs Sanctvsterra will fulfill their country's expectations. Bandos, meanwhile, could be described as a world-class midfielder.
Winner: Tanicius is good at defending, but can't do much more. The all-around Bandos wins.

- Valladares (11) vs (75) Hot Skitty on Wailord Action -

Players: ST Pedrinho (Valladares) vs DEF Renbu (Hot Skitty on Wailord Action)
Analysis: Pedrinho is the deadliest weapon Valladares offers, and he's pretty deadly. Renbu may be large, but Pedrinho is lightning fast, and deadly on and off the ball. Hot Skitty on Wailord Action's time in this tournament is done.
Winner: Pedrinho to the round of 32.

- Ko-oren (12) vs (53) Frenline Delpha -

Players: MID Timo Arevalo (Ko-oren) vs CB David Minet (Frenline Delpha)
Analysis: An emerging star on the Ko-orenite team, Arevalo is a very methodical midfield player, who passes, shoots, and does pretty much everything else in a very precise manner. Then there's Minet, a commanding center back for the Frenlins, but maybe not commanding enough.
Winner: Arevalo wins.

- San Jose Guayabal (13) vs (52) San Llera -

Players: ST Rodolfo Zelaya (San Jose Guayabal) vs CM Enric Bou (San Llera)
Analysis: And now we arrive at the most painful section of this tournament. Enric Bou, our shining light, our diamond in the rough, faces Rodolfo Zelaya, a scary-good striker. I wanted to pick Bou here. I really did. But Zelaya is just too good at scoring goals and creating goals and just being lethal. Rest in peace Enric. We'll miss you.
Winner: Unfortunately, it's Zelaya.

- Barunia (14) vs (51) Acronius -

Players: DEF Felix Benitez (Barunia) vs ST Titus Blackett (Acronius)
Analysis: In one of the more interesting match ups so far, tough Barunian defender Felix Benitez squares off against the Acronian striker Titus Blackett. Blackett is good enough to challenge Benitez, but I am of belief that Benitez is just too bullish and too tough for Blackett, as if Blackett was a star Pop Warner quarterback trying to play against college-level nose tackles.
Winner: As stated before, Benitez wins.

- Yttribia (15) vs (50) Maklohi Vai -

Players: CDM Dionysis Turverro (Yttribia) vs ST Tumo Makanopalani (Maklohi Vai)
Analysis: Dionysis Turverro of an odd Yttribia team is the only player on his team with a club, he plays for Di Maozoxe in Farfadillis. And while the worst Vaian would probably be better than the second-best Yttribian, Turverro is better than even Makanopalani, the best Vaian.
Winner: Turverro wins at this, but Yttribia probably won't win the World Cup with the roster they're sending out.

- Kirisaki (16) vs (49) Szavoda -

Players: CAM Mikoto Tsuchimikado (Kirisaki) vs MID Branimir Milic (Szavoda)
Analysis: Tshuchimikado and Milic are very similar players. They are both lethal shooters and passers with high work rates, surprisingly good defense, and excellent vision. The difference here is that Tsuchimikado is just a little better at everything she does compared to Milic, and that gives her the advantage.
Winner: Tsuchimikado gets the W.

- Kandorith (17) vs (48) Octinstine -

Players: ST Meng Zeije (Kandorith) vs LM Sean Owen (Octinstine)
Analysis: Meng Zeiji is one of the rising stars of soccer in general, not just in Kandorith, and his impeccable command of the ball makes him a very exciting player to watch, one who can do pretty much anything as long as it relates to scoring goals. Owen isn't a bad player himself, but the rangy midfielder has nothing on Zeije.
Winner: Zeije is the winner.

- Unified Sunrise Islands (18) vs (47) Flardania -

Players: ST Felipe Maniche (Unified Sunrise Islands) vs CM Pandazi Papadopoulos (Flardania)
Analysis: After the elimination of Enric Bou, the hopes of this magazine shifted towards Pandazi Papadopoulos, the only player in this tournament currently playing in San League Soccer. The midfielder, who plays a somewhat defensive role for his country, has silky passing and vision, with the ability to set up strikers like Joseph Yabuta with great chances. Unfortunately for him, he's faced up against star Unified Sunrisian striker Felipe Maniche, who is very good at finishing the chances Papadopoulos sets up.
Winner: A close one, but I'm going to take a leap of faith and go with Papadopoulos.

- Super-Llamaland (19) vs (46) Garifunya -

Players: ST Alex Cartwright (Super-Llamaland) vs LM Kristiaan Amadi (Garifunya)
Analysis: This one is a battle of two very balanced squads, whose best player was not easy to pick. Carthwright of Super-Llamaland is a Llamanean legend, but is aging at the age of 36. He has not lost his ability to score goals nonetheless. And Amadi is all over the place, making key goalmouth tackles on one end then scoring goalmouth goals on the other in a matter of minutes.
Winner: Like choosing these players to be included here, choosing the better of the two isn't easy. Cartwright, I guess.

- Nova Anglicana (20) vs (45) The Sword Bloke -

Players: CAM Emmanuel Moga (Nova Anglicana) vs DEF Ryan Hayward (The Sword Bloke)
Analysis: Aided by an excellent defense, The Sword Bloke nearly qualified for the playoffs in their second World Cup qualifying campaign. That defense was fueled by their captain Ryan Hayward, currently playing in Polkopia. He is now matchup up against Nova Anglicana's Emmanuel Moga, the Lions' mod deadly offensive force.
Winner: An interesting offense vs defense matchup, but Moga has too much class.

- Gregoryisgodistan (21) vs (44) Stvoto Latoli -

Players: CB Enemy Crusher Fatty Footy (Gregoryisgodistan) vs CDM Thughia Ouiva'penghefa (Stvoto Latoli)
Analysis: In this matchup, perhaps the biggest and baddest of the enemy crushers faces Thughia Ouiva'penghefa of Stvoto Latoli. The long-named Ouiva'penghefa is also a long and rangy person, and he is the anchor holding together Stvoto Latoli in the defensive midfield. Then there's Enemy Crusher Fatty Footy, who has a tendency to get carded but is very good at injuring opponents.
Winner: Enemy Crusher Fatty Footy gets the win due to him often taking out other teams' star players.

- Chiata (22) vs (43) Sameba -

Players: RB David Webb (Chiata) vs CAM Huela (Sameba)
Analysis: Huele of Sameba isn't the biggest name in the game, but he's one of the most exciting and underrated players. The Sameban has an excellent nose for the goal and is tearing it up domestically in Eura. Then there's David Webb for Chiata. Chiata is a balanced team, so picking Webb over some others wasn't easy, but he's still a very good player, one who can bomb up the flanks but still take care of his defensive responsibilities.
Winner: I'm going to have to hand this on to Huele.

- Brenecia (23) vs (42) Bears Armed -

Players: CB/RB Orson Faulkner (Brenecia) vs ST Marra SunDaughter (Bears Armed)
Analysis: Bears Armed is very good at producing bears who can attack, and Marra SunDaughter is an excellent example of that. Brenecia is very good at producing very good players, and Orson Faulkner, their captain, is very good at defense, and, occasionally, offense.
Winner: Advantage: Faulkner.

- Cosumar (24) vs (41) United States of Devonta -

Players: ST Anders Engstrom (Cosumar) vs Isaiah Brandon Russell (United States of Devonta)
Analysis: While Russell is a good all-around defensive midfielder, he simply is no match for Engstrom. Engstrom is the captain of his team and the star of Cosumarite soccer, creative with and without the ball, and always focused on scoring goals.
Winner: A fairly easy decision towards Engstrom.

- Electrum (25) vs (40) Jeruselem -

Players: CM Kirk Lynn-Peters (Electrum) vs ST Princess Laura Virginia Dallas (Jeruselem)
Analysis: While Electrum's Kirk Lynn-Peters is a solid box-to-box midfielder, it's the princess that steals the show here. Laura Virginia Dallas is the daughter of the coach, the princess of Jeruselem, and easily the best player on the team. She will be relied on to deliver for Jeruselem in the hectic Group 16.
Winner: And according to Viva Dicce, Princess Laura Viginia Dallas will deliver.

- Semarland (26) vs (39) Timbermunich-

Players: CM Demba Cisse (Semarland) vs Great One-Arm Willy (Timbermunich)
Analysis: It was difficult to resist the temptation of picking Marc Lygaard for Semarland, but we succeeded in resisting and instead chose pact and creative midfielder Demba Cisse. Against him will be Great One-Arm Willy, who is quite possibly one of the best shooters in the world, though he doesn't have too much talent besides that.
Winner: A difficult one, but Great One-Arm Willy is just too precise for Cisse.

- Krytenia (27) vs (38) Taeshan -

Players: ST Valrauncion (Krytenia) vs ST Miles Snavely (Taeshan)
Analysis: The Taeshani Snavely is a very promising striker for his team, as shown by his Copa Rushmori heroics. But for now, he isn't anywhere near Valrauncion. The Krytenian elf striker is one of the best ever, a living legend.
Winner: Not much arguing with picking Valrauncion here.

- HopNation (28) vs (37) Omerica -

Players: ST Pech Schytaing (HopNation) vs ST Jan Niklas-Rosenkrants (Omerica)
Analysis: A lot of strikers recently. Anyways, San Lleran fans should be familiar with both of these players, as they have played against San Llera in the last two cycles. They are both similar players, very simple. They're good at scoring goals. Not great, but very good.
Winner: In the end, Schytaing has a slight advantage.

- Abanhfleft (29) vs (36) Polkopia -

Players: CB Luke Edwards (Abanhfleft) vs MID Boris Polgov (Polkopia)
Analysis: Abanhfleft's wise, experienced, commanding center back and captain is the higher seed in this matchup, and he faces the versatile Polkopian Boris Polgov. Polgov isn't a bad player, but Edwards's consistency gets him the win.
Winner: Edwards wins.

- Ceni (30) vs (35) Schottia -

Players: ST Kel Koromin (Ceni) vs CAM Kim Coultan (Schottia)
Analysis: The name Koromin may be vaguely familiar to San Lleran fans, and it is certainly familiar to me. Kira Koromin was named the best player in the Di Bradini Cup, but can her brother do the same for the World Cup? He's facing Kim Coultan, the force behind the Schottic team.
Winner: Very difficult choice, but it goes to Coultan.

- Polaaskan (31) vs (34) Zenic -

Players: ST Timo Heinckel (Polaaskan) vs LM Gavin Barnsley (Zenic)
Analysis: Polaaskan and Zenic are very similar sides - good, not great. It wouldn't be a shock if they qualified for the World Cup, but they still won't in all likelihood. But two players who are World Cup-caliber are Timo Heinckel and Gavin Barnsley, both the beating heart of their respective team.
Winner: A tough one, but Barnsley is the narrow winner.

- Kernansquillec (32) vs (33) Carialus -

Players: ST Varinia Varano (Kernansquillec) vs LB Gilles de Lainey (Carialus)
Analysis: We have arrived at our finals matchup of the day, with Varinia Varano and Gilles de Lainey squaring off for a place in the round of 32. Varano is more clearly her teams best player, she is the main goalscoring force for the Kerns. Meanwhile, de Lainey is just another Carialus player, not worse or better than many others.
Winner: Varano is the winner.

That's that for the Round of 64. Stay tuned for the Round of 32. Until then, good bye!

by **Kernansquillec** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 5:06 pm

THE INTERVIEW

Harry Broudant

Personal information

Full name       Harry Mineur Broudant
Date of birth   19th Febuary 2002 (63 years old)
Place of birth  Binic
                Coronon, Kernansquillec
Sex             Male
Height          1m79
Position        Defender
Nationality      Kernansquillecan

Youth career

2008 - 2020     Binic Youth Academy

Senior career

2032 - 2034      4th Infantry FC
2034 - 2042      Binic

Teams managed

2048 - 2051      Binic
2053 - 2056      Rennes du Nord
2063 - now       Kernansquillec

Harry, welcome to the Interview. Make yourself comfortable. How are things shaping up at the start of qualifying?

Things are going well so far. The team's a bit disappointed not to have managed to bring all three points back home against Garifunya but a point is still a point. Other teams around us have also slipped up so it's not a big tragedy. There's a long way to go still and it'll be the crunch ties between us and our rivals, as well as these other games, that will decide our fate.

Speaking of these crunch ties, Kernansquillec will be facing Barunia in a very important and difficult away game. Do you plan on resting any of your key players ahead of that game against Britonisea?

Not initially no. Britonisea are a side that are not to be underestimated. Even if we are playing at home, they can cause us some problems so we will have to be careful. But if our side manage to get a decent cushion during the game early on, I may well consider resting a few of the key players. But this early on, fitness levels are still very good and the focus is mainly on strengthening team cohesion rather than fatigue levels.

Still, surely it is best to make sure some of your players are fully fit and fresh before the Barunia game?

Wherever they play 90 minutes or not, these players wouldn't be in my squad if I knew they weren't capable of performing to maximum level in multiple games.

Variana Varano has been one of the key players in your side since you took over the national team. She's scored 21 goals under your management and has recently received quite a bit of praise in the foreign press lately. Is it fair to say she's one of the motors behind your team and one of the players who can fire Kernansquillec to the World Cup?

Indeed she is just that. She's a fantastic player, I have seen very few players like her who are capable of knowing exactly where to be and when to be there. A number of her goals are the result of her footballing intelligence. But she has so much more than that to her game. Her physical side has developed a lot over the last few seasons and she is now very much a complete forward. I'm so thankful that she is playing for us rather than against us.

She is, along with a number of other players, one of the truely world class forwards in your team, but do you feel the team is maybe a bit lacking in quality in the defensive half of the game?

There is still work to be done both going forward and defending, but I don't think we are weak defensively at all. We may lack a bit of experience with quite a young defence, but the whole team is quite young as well so I don't see this as being a problem. The main problem we have in consistency. We struggle to maintain a high standard of football, a standard we are capable of reaching, over a full match and over a full campaign. Often the points we lose come from a 20 minute spell where the team lose their connection with the game. It's simply a mental issue and one we are working together as a team to solve.

One final question on the team. Do you think you can qualify this year and do you expect your team to qualify?

Expect is a big word. We have two world class teams in our group that will be very hard to surpass. We can do it, I'm sure of it, but everything needs to come together and we will need that little bit of extra quality, of extra luck when things start getting a bit more difficult.

Hopefully the team will be able to make it for the first time since World Cup 57. Back then you were just two years old. I don't suppose you remember anything from back then do you?

I'm afraid I don't, but I have a photo of me and my family down at the local pub watching the games so apparently I was there, but at two you're just too young to understand what was happening. Unfortunately.

But the football legacy saw you join the youth ranks at Binic, a team you would later go on to play for and manage. What did you learn from your time playing for your home town?

I learnt the importance of working hard, of making sure to do things the proper way. But most of all, I learnt to enjoy myself. Especially during the post-war years when we were only really playing for the love of the game and of our club. Those years were the hardest I've ever experienced, be it on a personal or footballing level, but they are what made me.

Of course, you are part of the Great War generation who saw their lives torn apart by the conflict that pretty much accompanied you from the end of your teens well into adulthood. Was it hard getting back into football after all that happened?

Not really, no. Football helped a lot actually, to get back into a normal life, to forget all that had happened. It was very much a form of therapy for some of the lads, especially in the army teams.

And after all of that, you were part of the people who reformed the First Division and who gave Kernansquillecan professional football a second coming. Are you proud of what you managed to acheive?

Proud? I'm not sure. Reforming the league would have happened with or without me, football is deeply entrenched in the lives of most people here so it was inevitable. But I am very proud of the team I managed during my time at Rennes du Nord. We had a very good side and managed to impress a lot of people and put the team on the map. Things have been more difficult lately for them, but I still keep an eye on them and hope for the best.

Harry, thank you very much for your time. We wish you all the best for the rest of qualifying.

Thanks!

Garifunya 1-1 Kernansquillec
(Boumers 80' / Lilac 76')
Staad Fyet nan Garifunya, Frederykvil)

# Group 2                     Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts   Form
1 The Sarian                    3    1   2   0     2    1   +1     5   DDW
2 Britonisea                    3    1   2   0     8    4   +4     5   DWX
3 Barunia                       3    1   2   0     3    2   +1     5   XDW
4 Kernansquillec                2    1   1   0     5    3   +2     4   WX-
5 Garifunya                     2    0   2   0     3    3    0     2   -XX
6 RealSquad                     2    0   1   1     2    3   −1     1   X-L                Qualification position
7 Dreamplanet                   3    0   0   3     5   12   −7     0   LLL                Playoff position

by **Pasarga** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 5:36 pm

"Who do you think has the best best chance in the Superliga this year, CAP again or someone else? I heard that Galatica has been pretty active in the transfer window and brought in some reinforcements to try and give themselves a chance to get back into the UICA spaces."

"I've not heard anything like that and of course it has to be CAP again, you would be foolish to not go into a season thinking that CAP is anything but the favorites. They've won what, sixteen of the last twenty titles? There is no denying their dominance in the domestic scene and they even have had moderate success in the Champions Cup and Globe Cup, as well as the CdC. Shame that more of our clubs can not find a way to make good runs in those ICCs, get the domestic scene a little bit more respect."

"Maybe people just don't find one team dominated leagues to be all that compelling? I mean, Dwile Warriors has one of the best players on the planet and could be argued to be the best Apoxian club that there is and yet they fail to have the some sort of singularity success as CAP does in their own domestic scene. People like competition and compelling story lines, they don't want to see the same team winning a competition over and over and over again. It begins to get boring and repetitive, thus people lose their interest."

"What about those players and sides trying to take down the giant, what about the club that comes out of nowhere to give the best team a run for their money? Remember a few years back when Hellinic Rouge got an injection of cash, brought in some players, and were suddenly a top five side? That is some good entertainment and compelling story lines, you can't say that people didn't buy into Hellinic cause we both know they did. Even now, you have sides like Tani and Galatica that make CAP have to work for their titles, they just don't roll the league over."'

"While that is quite true on both fronts, at the end of the season, it is usually CAP that wins the title and usually takes home the Copa as well, which to the foreign audience becomes stale and boring. Hellinic never managed to usurp CAP's title and are now struggling to just maintain being in the SuperLiga while the old powers of Turkish and Club Stein-los can't seem to string two good season together and attract the same sort of talent they used to. As much as it pains me to admit it, the Pasarga domestic scene just isn't interesting and until things change with the balance of power, I don't see it getting that respect and attention that many in the nation seem to think it should have."

"What about our youth, there are some good academies in the clubs that are producing decent talent for the league. While it is not as quick as bringing in some foreign talent to take them to the top, there are clubs that are developing crops of players to contend."

"Every analyst agrees though that we're currently in a dip in the talent level in the youth, so while there might be some prospects, there are not enough to bring them to CAP's level. This is even more true when you consider the good talent has been getting slowly picked off by bigger clubs from outside the dual islands as of late. Which is great for the national team but it has put its price on the domestic league."

"Perhaps but I am not so quick to resign myself that the domestic scene in Pasarga has met its death, I still believe that we can be one of the best domestic scenes not just in Rushmore but the entire world. That same belief I had in the national team that finally came true as of late, it just takes time, some skill, and a dash of luck."

"If only it were that easy."

by **Krytenia** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 6:00 pm

K1K: The Game Of History

MATCH #220: THE SMASHING ORANGEY BIT
Krytenia 0-1 Audioslavia, World Cup 27 Second Round
Metrewalk, Bedistan, 28 June 2042

So, we here at the Retrospective have talked about Starblaydia - twice - but what about the other 50% of our millennial match opponents? Well, they say you never forget your first time...

THE BUILD-UP
Krytenia's World Cup XXVI campaign had ended in disaster. Literally. The side had been ripped apart by a coach crash in Paripana's Jativan Islands having just been eliminated from the tournament. Famous names like Robin Spivey, Kevin Keda, and Dave van Staveren perished in the tragedy, leaving the team a fractured shell.

That the Aces managed to put together a team for the following cup at all was an achievement. Patched up though they were, with a forty-plus James Barcali in goal and the rest of the team made up either of survivors of the crash or young greenhorns, they stormed through their qualifying campaign with just two defeats; both of them, unsurprisingly, against a Sarzonian side that still held the Indian sign over them.

The finals of the competition were held in Phoenicia and Bedistan. The Aces had only a short distance to travel, Bedistan being their northern neighbours at this point in history (isn't fluid geography fun, kids?) and finished second in their group behind the co-hosts. This led to them facing a nation whose reputation preceded them; the fact that said reputation was for choking on the grand stage was neither here nor there.

The nation in question? Audioslavia.

THE MATCH
It seems almost incongruous now, but this match took place at before the seemingly eternal rivalry between the two nations' most famous faces, Jeremy Jaffacake and Rameses Niblick III emerged. Indeed, the seeds of the rivalry were almost certainly sown here, though they would take time to germinate. This, perhaps, is the only game between the Aces and the Bulls where the focus was on the pitch rather than the press box. Krytenia were the underdogs, despite a World Cup third place finish to their name; Audioslavia, meanwhile, were the favourites in pretty much any game that wasn't a final.

The game started as a rather strategic affair. Krytenian co-managers Ian Valacci and Edward Johnson had set out their stall to absorb the Audioslavian pressure and use the flanks; the tactic was working, as the Bulls had barely a sniff at Barcali's goal. The flip side of this, though, was that the 'slaves were quite happy to give Thomas Cooper and Andy Pedroso the room on the wings before snuffing out any crosses that came in with aplomb. The Aces changed tack, bringing the ball inside from the flanks, and Gabriel Kennedy and Jerome Jaffacake-Phillips - Jeremy's own son from a one-night stand with a Krytenian socialite "journalist" - got in on the act. Gunnar Yngve, though, was in fine fettle, and the Audioslavian goalkeeper ensured the match stayed goalless untill the break.

The second half continued in much the same vein as the first. Krytenia pressed well, not allowing their opponents space to create chances; those that did squeak through, usually for centre-forward Arturo Vitalis, never really threatened Barcali. The stage was set for either a famous day for Krytenia, an Audioslavian sucker-punch, or (gulp) extra time and penalties. With five minutes to go, and the score still at nil-nil, Krytenia knocked on the door again. James Iagas threaded the ball for Chris Blannix; he found substitute Alex Krige, who used his fresh legs to get the better of Bulls captain Dietmar Mussorgsky and Mika Väinämöinen. He looked up, saw Jaffacake-Phillips running into space, lofted the ball over...and the Ellisham man cracked the ball past a helpless Yngve and into the net.

The fans went wild. The players mobbed Jaffacake-Phillips. The Audioslavians...had noticed the linesman's flag and played to the whistle that was lost in the noise of the Aces fans. The Krytenian striker had strayed marginally offside as the ball from Krige had gone over, and their opponents took full advantage by taking a quick free-kick. With the men in the sky blue and navy stripes completely out of position, Audioslavia finally had the chance to create a proper opportunity. With a five on three situation, the Bulls moved the ball quickly through the middle, setting Vitalis up for what would surely be the winning goal. Barcali, though, had other ideas, bending almost out of shape to tip the Fenix striker's shot past the post and out for a corner. Krytenia regrouped for the set piece. Nikki Polsson whipped the ball into the crowd of players, a flick sent the ball the way of Sebastian Fiori, and his header kept the pressure going as Kabaofo Alanila and Jaffacake-Phillips both slid in, one to poke the ball goalwards, the other to clear. The Krytenian got there first, but off balance, and inadvertently sliced the ball into his own net. The fact that he was half-Slav probably wasn't much comfort at that point.

It proved to be the last meaningful moment of the game. Krytenia had been eliminated by a cruel twist of Margaret's fateful finger, and World Cup XXVII, for them, was over.

THE AFTERMATH
Jerome Jaffacake-Phillips put his disappointment behind him, having a successful career for both club and country. Indeed, many of the younger players in the squad would form the nucleus of the side that reached the semi-finals of World Cup XXIX on home soil. Jaffacake-Phillips would later find employment as both a pundit for KBS and envoy for sportswear company JMC.

James Barcali finally retired after the game, at the age of forty-seven. He'd go on to become KFA president before an incident involving copious amounts of vodka, a Bostopian, a Sortherner, and a case of self-defenestration led to his replacement by another World Cup XXVII alumnus, the legendary Gabe Kennedy.

Audioslavia would go on to lose in the quarter-finals to Bedistan. Eight years later, they'd lose their fourth World Cup final; it would be well over a century before a Bulls captain finally got to lift the famed trophy.

Rameses Niblick and Jeremy Jaffacake have somehow defied the usual life-cycles of ordinary humans. Both contiued in journalism for many years; Niblick now manages the Aces, whilst Jaffacake earns his corn driving ridiculously fast cars in an equally ridiculous fashion. You can still cut the tension with a cricket stump when the two are in the same room.

#1: It Haperd One Night
#89: You Beat Us, We're Still Better
#637: The Magnificent Seven
#361: What's The Time?

by **Nova Anglicana** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 7:21 pm

PJP Wins Plurality, Will Set About Forming New Government

John McAvoy, Political Columnist, Londinium Courier

Party                Constituencies           PR        Total              +/-          Vote %
Progressive Justice              20           20           40               -6           38.09
People's                         16           16           32               -5           29.31
National                          3            4            7               +7            7.78
Liberal Secularist                3            4            7               +0            7.36
Libertarian                       3            4            7               +1            7.25
Stewardship                       4            3            7               +3            6.58
Socialist Workers'                0            0            0               +0            0.92
Equality                          0            0            0               +0            0.80
Democracy                         0            0            0               +0            0.61
Dominonist                        0            0            0               +0            0.30

The results are in from the Nova Anglicana parliamentary election, and the Progressive Justice Party has won a plurality of seats, just as the polls expected them to. They won 40 of 100 seats, leading their nearest rival, the People's Party, by eight seats. Both the PJP and the PP saw a change in leadership this election cycle, with Hal Blackwood taking over for a retiring Allen Mumford, while Shadow Minister for Immigration Michael Ramsey won the leadership election after the party forced David Chadwick to resign. Ramsey took the PP hard to the right in the run-up to the election, talking tough on immigration, defense, and welfare. For his part, Blackwood steered a bit more moderate course than Mumford had and mostly campaigned on the PJP's ability to govern than many specific promises.

All of the minor parties won seven seats apiece, their 28 combined seats representing the largest number held by minor parties in Nova Anglican electoral history. Making their debut was King Voss' National Party. Voss, the disgruntled unofficial leader of the People's Party's right wing, founded the National Party after losing to Ramsey in the PP leadership election. He ran on a platform of social and cultural conservatism, hitting many of the same points as Ramsey, but taking a harder line on them. Seven seats is a strong debut for the Nationals, and doubtless many of their votes came from disaffected PP supporters and independents fed up with the liberal immigration policies of Mumford and the PJP. Also on the right were the Libertarians, picking up an additional seat. The collective right has 46 seats out of 100, but it remains to be seen if they will act as a unified opposition. The Libertarians and the Nationals have little in common except for a desire to reduce government spending, and the People's Party may be unable to bridge the gap. This particular parliamentary configuration will test Ramsey's leadership skills. If Blackwood and the PJP are unable to get much done and Ramsey shows that he can wrangle the collective right, then the scales might well tip in his favor next election.

On the left, the PJP and the Stewardship Party will continue to work together. The Stewardship Party picked up three seats, boosted by winning another constituency in Prince Edward Island and perhaps also picking up some voters from the left flank of the PJP, disappointed by the election of the moderate Blackwood. Together they have 47 seats, enough to beat the collective right, but short of the 51 seats needed to govern. The Liberal Secularists thus hold the key to government for the PJP/SP alliance. It remains to be seen if Blackwood and Marilyn Greenfield (SP leader) will invite them to join the government as a full partner or merely ask for a confidence and supply arrangement. There is little danger of the Liberal Secularists defecting to the right, due to the right's social conservatism, but they could easily frustrate any potential governing the PJP/SP alliance wants to do and thus force them to consider more issues dear to the Secularists. Confidence and supply would require fewer Cabinet positions (probably just the one, held by Emily Waterford), but would offer less security. The PJP would probably have to concede at least two positions to the Secularists if they brought them fully into the government.

Also of interest is how Blackwood's cabinet will differ from Mumford's. Blackwood has not indicated who will be deputy PM, but one might think that Sandra Meyer, his closest opponent in the leadership election, would receive the post. This would entail her giving up her position as Minister of Infrastructure, but it might be worth it to be the PM's right-hand woman. Should Meyer refuse or not be picked, sources indicate that longtime Deputy and current Minister of Defense William Lyons would be Blackwood's pick. Tim McKenzie and Talia Sherwood, both also contestants in the leadership election, are also strong candidates for Cabinet positions and would bring a bit of youth to the upper ranks of the PJP. Sherwood, if selected, would take the Minister of Immigration portfolio, but McKenzie is a bit hazier. His strong leadership in New Brunswick makes him an excellent choice for a Cabinet post, and he could be possibly considered for Minister of Health and Social Services, Infrastructure if Meyer chooses to be Deputy PM, Justice, or Labor. But first Blackwood has to form a government, so we'll see how things shake out.

by **Chromatika** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 7:21 pm

The first two games of the qualifying campaign had one theme for Luuk Aart: Redemption. After the debacle that was the Baptism of Fire, losing 0-1 against a top team like Vilita, and then winning in a wild fashion in the previous game against Kyrjasmark was glorious. The defense was firing on all cylinders and the counterattacking style or getting a few solid chances a game was working out.

On the home front, the news was even better. The success on the pitch had taken the spotlight away from Luuk, and his upcoming trial for "the impersonation of a DIn individual, willingly, while lying to the general public" was not being mentioned as much. When it was, it was in the light of "oh that is such a shame that the Chromatiks will have to take care of that issue when this is over". Now, though, Luuk was not scared. No, not when there were so many games to go, so many more chances to show that Chromatik football had a future. Not now.

The next game against Sargossa would prove whether the great start was a fluke or not for the Chromatiks. Sitting at one win and two draws, the Sargossan team was sitting pretty. They had given up six goals so far in qualifying, so the Chromatiks would have to make sure that they made the most of their chances. That was nothing new, however, as Chromatik football was all about striking hard in the few times that they did.

With teams like Eshan and Polaasken in the horizon, and those being the teams the Chromatiks would fight for a top half placing with, losing by less than two goals or winning against Sargossa would do wonders for the team.

Luuk was determined to make the most of every game, every opportunity. The probability that this would be his first and last world cup plagued his mind. He would make sure that his play would be remembered for the teams to come, no matter what that took.

by **Farfadillis** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 7:22 pm

Part 1

I came around two days later. It was like a very intense bat of my eyelashes. Utter confusion ensued, naturally. First thing I noticed was that I was at a hospital, so I was alive. Second thing was the weird apparatus placed on my mouth. I guessed that probably helped keep me alive. I was not in a comfortable position, so I tried to shift positions a bit.

Describing the freezing, terrifying sensation I felt trying to do that is hard. My legs were not responding. I couldn't feel a thing from the waist to my toes. To me, a bit over two minutes ago, I was walking just fine. Staggering a little bit, but that was it. The intense pain I felt everywhere in my torso - a consequence of three different interventions, as I would later find out - I just couldn't care about. But my legs, my legs weren't moving.

I took long and deep breaths to calm down a bit. It wasn't doing the trick, though. I couldn't feel my... uh... friend down there, either. I wouldn't get anything out of a panic attack, though. It took a lot of effort, but I finally convinced myself this was just like any other match, and that I had played in many more difficult ones. Not football matches, of course, but what I call 'life matches'. I'd already lost my family, and I'd already managed to be happy despite it. This would just be an easier match.

A funny thing about the situation was how I didn't even think for a moment that my career as a whole was definitely over. It just didn't cross my mind; it was not something I cared about. I was just some random bloke who was facing the possibility of losing his ability to walk. Just a random bloke like any other.

After finally accepting fate in my own way, I looked up to realize the TV was turned on. The news channel. I thought it to be very convenient, really. It would be an... unexpected way to find out about my incident, but the doctor was nowhere to be seen, so it's not like I had other ways of finding out. It's not like I could turn the TV off, either.

"NATION TORN BETWEEN JOY AND SORROW." Read the headline. Right, I'd forgotten we'd won the AOCAF Cup. Great way to ruin the joy for my teammates. I wondered how Dandalleion was doing. His glorious retirement, bathed in glory, stained by the possible death of his best friend. The newscaster even announced that it was extremely unlikely I'd even wake up. Sensationalism, I was guessing. I mean, I felt very much awake... from the waist up, that is.

The next headline was "NATIONAL HEALTHCARE HOLIDAY ONCE AGAIN LEAVES DEATH TOLL IN THE HUNDREDS." If you ask me, it was a bad idea to give everyone in the healthcare industry a day off simultaneously. Had I been shot two days later, I'd have definitely died. Close shave right there. I wasn't very surprised though. As a Farf, you just grow to understand the natural flow of things in the Outlandish Lands. What I definitely understood at that moment was that there would be nobody there to feed me. Or help me go to the bathroom. Hmm... maybe there were more pressing matters than the whole walking problem...

by **Ceni** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 7:48 pm

"Good morning everyone, I am Professor Denaera Coven of the University of Ceni. I know a lot of you aren't all that interested in the topic that I am about to discuss today, the topic of energy policy for Ceni. More specifically, I will go into detail about the different forms of energy and their suitability for the Cenian energy market. I will try to discuss solar energy, windpower, hydropower (including tidal energy), oil, natural gas, coal, nuclear, and biofuel. And I'll try to do this without making everyone go to sleep in this auditorium, but it's definitely something that I can't guarantee. But what I will guarantee is that this talk will be accessible to the layman: no technical terms or erudite arcana. Everyone will be able to understand this talk without consulting a big fat dictionary.”

"First, I will be talking about solar power. Solar energy has the potential to provide a large amount of renewable electricity, but there are drawbacks to its use in Ceni. While Ceni does have an above-average amount of sunshine, solar panels can't provide energy when the sun isn't shining - half the time - or when clouds cover the sun. In all likelihood, solar panels will be producing energy only a third of the time because of these limitations. Also, solar panels are notoriously inefficient. In one hour, the sun puts out enough energy to power all of Earth's energy needs, as large as it is. That's a lot, but because of the limits of our technology, we can't capture all of that. Without going into technical details, solar panels transfer the Sun's light energy into electrical energy. Plants do this with chemical energy very well, but solar panels don't, and a lot of energy is instead transferred into heat. Some engineers have proposed that pools of water be used to trap this excess heat, and that's a good idea, but solar panels still need more research and development in order to trap the sun's energy more efficiently.

"Another obstacle regarding solar panels' adoption in Ceni is the distribution of the power, tied in with my first and second points. Because the solar panels will be producing more during the day and less at night, we need to have solutions to put the excess power onto the grid during the day, or we need to invest in batteries - which are sometimes fairly inefficient. Because of the technical issues with solar panels, there are also some practical issues with their use in Ceni, especially on a large scale. Huge solar farms aren't possible because there isn't enough space in Ceni, with a big empty space in the desert optimal and Ceni having none of that. With that being said, solar panels are a lot more effective for use in Ceni on a smaller scale basis, such as the roofs of houses or other buildings. Small-scale installation can alleviate the pressures on the grid and supplement electricity for local uses. When solar panels get more efficient, I think we will go a lot farther in our use of them, but still, today they can help provide electricity for homes, businesses, and offices on a small scale, increasing our renewable energy usage.

"Wind power has more potential than solar power for mass power generation, but it is less feasible for smaller scale generation, and has some of the same drawbacks as solar power. I'll start with the drawbacks. Firstly, wind power is expensive. Wind turbines cost millions of dollars to set up, especially if they are built offshore. Secondly, wind power has a similar problem to solar power: wind turbines cannot generate power when the wind isn't blowing. Some sites in Ceni have more potential for wind generation, and some have less potential. The problem with that is, like with solar, there isn’t a lot of space for wind turbines, most specifically on the mainland. The solution to that problem is to build wind turbines offshore. Obviously, the main drawback to offshore is the cost. Not only do companies or the government have to pay for the turbines themselves, but also the cost of installation as well. That being said, there are advantages for offshore wind farms. The wind out at sea is more reliable and stronger, so the turbines generate more electricity more of the time, and they don’t take up valuable space on the mainland. With Ceni an island in the middle of a strait, Ceni has a perfect and vast opportunity for offshore wind farms off its coat. Now the government or utility companies must decide whether the potential for stead (if sometimes unreliable) power at offshore wind farms is worth the somewhat higher cost than other alternatives. That being said, there is an opportunity for smaller-scale wind power generation – a wind lens, which will focus the power of the wind and make it spin faster. This makes wind power a little more practical for individual homes, apartments, or businesses.

“For those unfamiliar with hydropower, hydropower (in a dam, at least) is generated when rivers spin a turbine in that dam, generating electricity. Hydropower’s appeal in Ceni is generally limited because Ceni has no rivers of any kind. Therefore, there is absolutely no potential for hydropower in Ceni. For the sake of discussion, I’ll still go over the benefits and drawbacks of hydropower, imagining that Ceni actually did have hydropower resources in the form of rivers. First, the drawbacks: dams associated with hydropower wreak havoc on the environment. They flood farmland, villages, and whatever else lies in the area of the future reservoirs. They also stop the natural migration of fish. Finally, with some of the other renewable energy sources, building dams is expensive, sometimes in the billions of dollars. Yet there are some significant benefits for hydropower. Hydropower provides a large amount of power, very reliably – a river always flows, so unless there is a severe drought (always a risk), a dam will always generate hydropower, and dams can provide a large number of people with renewable electricity. However, as I mentioned earlier, Ceni’s situation cuts out a large part of the debate among environmentalists about hydropower – its electricity power versus its harm to the environment. This debate is moot because Ceni has no rivers of any kind to build dams on, so the only hydropower Ceni can utilize is hydropower purchased from other countries.

“However, an interesting form of energy associated with hydropower is tidal power, and because of Ceni’s geography, it has a large potential for this form of energy. Ceni is bordered by straits on both sides, creating stronger tides and more opportunities to utilize tidal power. Furthermore, straits between the main island of Ceni and some of the minor, outlying islands in Ceni’s territory create narrow areas, which in turn create stronger tides and good places to place tidal turbines. Mechanically, tidal power is much like hydropower: water, in this case the power of the tides and waves, turns a turbine to generate electricity. In my opinion, tidal power presents the best cost benefit analysis for Cenian renewable power generation. Tidal turbines are relatively inexpensive, whether they are bottom-shelf mounted or free-flowing turbines. The tides and waves move throughout the day, so they are most reliable. Tidal turbines can provide a large amount of electricity, especially if the tides are strong in places where there are tidal turbines. However, there is a drawback to tidal power: tidal power is still in research and development for full refinement of the technology, so it might be a couple of years before tidal power is in widespread use. I think it’s worth the wait, though, as it will be very feasible and reliable technology when it can be used widely. The Cenian government thinks so too; they have allocated millions of dollars in grants to develop this technology.

“Finally, I will be talking about three nonrenewable resources and two renewable resources that aren’t the best choices for Cenian power or electricity generation. I’ll start out with the nonrenewable resources. Oil, gas, and coal all present some problems in that Ceni does not have any significant deposits of any of those, as of yet, and deposits of coal are unlikely to be found. There might be some of either natural gas or oil, but as for now, the Cenian government has not allowed any significant exploration for any of those offshore, where they would be found. Of course, Ceni can still import all of these resources for use in gasoline, Cenian manufacturing, heating, and et cetera, et cetera. All of these nonrenewable resources have similar benefits and drawbacks. On the positive side, natural gas, oil, and coal are both easily and readily obtainable, and they are cheap, a major concern in today’s economy. However, there are some significant drawbacks to their use in Ceni. Besides the fact that Ceni must import these resources, they are extremely harmful to the environment, although natural gas less so that coal or oil. Natural gas and oil, when burned to create energy in car engines or coal for electricity, create carbon, sulfur, and other emissions that harm the environments. Now lastly, I’ll move onto the renewable resources of our five less covered resources. Nuclear energy, which is generated when atoms of uranium are split, creating a chain reaction known as fission, is impractical in Ceni for two reasons: one, there is not a lot of space for big nuclear power plants, and secondly, a nuclear disaster caused by a tsunami or other event (such as negligence) will cause nuclear fallout on the majority of Ceni. The government has determined we cannot take that risk. And finally, with the possibility of biofuels, their shunting of corn and beans from food production creates an increase of food prices, which negatively impacts the poor as well as the everyday people, and biofuel is very inefficient.

“So, in conclusion, I’ve discussed several sources of energy today: solar energy, windpower, hydropower (including tidal energy), oil, natural gas, coal, nuclear, and biofuel. Of the eight that I’ve discussed, I think that tidal power presents the best choice for Cenian energy production, followed by solar energy and wind power. I thank you for taking the time to listen to me and I hope you’ve learned something from this presentation. Thank you again. I’m Professor Denaera Coven of the University of Ceni.”

by **Associated Godlands** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 9:09 pm

GodHatesYou.God
The official blog of Shirley Phelps-Roper

Remember what I was saying about God raising Gregoryisgodistan's expectations? Ya. That's applicable here. No way God would have made us lose 4-3 to The Sword Bloke if not so as to raise their expectations before damning them to hell. I personally don't really think it's necessary to raise those Swordeans' expectations, they're already as cocky and annoying as children. But then again, God is all-knowing, and He probably knows something I don't. But there are things I do know. For example, I know that God created the world around 6000 years ago. I know that atheists are the spawn of Satan. And, of course, I know that The Sword Bloke will be eternally damned to Hell when there time comes. And until then, I can lay back, relax, watch them celebrate their victories and think, you have no idea what's coming to you. And then I will watch Shop Owner burn in an endless pit of fire, right next to all the heathens.

You know how heathen doctors incinerate things that are contaminated? God has the same process. Burn those heathens down to ash, and they can finally be cleansed. Now that I think about it, do they turn to ash in Hell? Or do they just feel continuous pain? I'll have to go ask God next time He speaks to me.

I wonder if God keeps video footage of Hell. I'd love to see it and watch people like Martin Luther King and Charles Darwin cry in pain. I'll ask Him that too. If he says yes, I could put a live stream on this website! That'd be fun. Unfortunately, I'm pretty sure God hates the media, so He'd disapprove of something like that. I'll try to convince Him next time anyway, followers. Well, I won't. He is perfect, so He can't be convinced, as He is correct the first time every time. But God must not hate my media! Let's see what he says.

People sometimes ask me if it's difficult being God's mouthpiece. After all, God has a lot to say. But it's not difficult, it's in fact fun to do my God-given duty. I don't know why people would question my ability as mouthpiece. Maybe I should have those people executed.

You know what? I'm getting off topic. The Sword Bloke. That's the topic. Despite me being sure about The Sword Bloke's destiny, I would be lying if I said I was not a little worried about ours. I mean, it's great to cause more pain for Shop Owner, but what about us? Oh well God is perfect. I'm sure he'll find a way to balance making The Sword Bloke and Gregoryisgodistan happy while we win the World Cup.

In case you were wondering, I put Martin Luther back as a starter. He was fine. In fact, I believe he assisted on one of the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ's three goals. The Lord and Savior Jesus Christ assisted on the other two. That defense was really bad though. John had an own goal and also gave up a penalty. Or was that James? Or Judas Iscariot? I can't remember. Pope Francis wasn't great either.

I'm sure you all will be disappointed after today's result, but just remember that God has a plan. Shirley Phelps-Roper out.

by **Stvoto Latoli** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 9:13 pm

Groups 1-10 Matchday 4 Cutoff

Float or Drown?

SCORES

by **Northern Sunrise Islands** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 10:00 pm

WORLD CUP 73
They who fought Firebirds (...and won!)
A full packed Union Stadium rooting really shown its' value. For a team that wasn't expected to win against a team that held the World Cup back-to-back, the Unified Sunrise Islands squad grabbed the win on the very last minutes. On a star-studded match, to top it all off. Some of the best footballing seen in Mardi Lopunnies' stadium and by far one of the matches that will be talked about for years to come in Sunrisian history saw Felipe Maniche show high class while none of the Osarians' best were too far behind. The hot action started with an early shot by Wesley Kane almost found net, only for Joan Marcel to display heavy attention, holding that shot one-handed. The basque keeper would continuously spring into action before a well-thought cross by Kane reached the head of Clemente Jaconelli to start things at the scoring column.

One of the biggest issues for the Sunrisians (and for pretty much any team facing Osarius) was keeping the ball. So while the Firebirds did their usual tactic of getting the ball and keeping as far as possible from the opposition's grasp, the Savior Grey had to go for less usual ways of keeping the ball. For starters, they spent the first twenty minutes of the game trying to keep the ball on the air as most as they could. This, of course, was helped by Hannah Alcouin, who made sure to use her explosiveness to prevent the ball from falling with hard, lobbed shots. It eventually reached its' purpose when, after five players made a web of crosses, Felipe Maniche intercepted it with a powerful shot to the back of the net. 1-1. Hannah Alcouin, still under the "lob high" tactic would turn the tables, scoring the second goal after a ball lobbed high upwards met her right foot that so happened to be high on the sky, in usual Alcouin fashion.

Firebirds would now be the ones to get the draw, before the end of the first half when an opportunity met Marco Puntoriero, after an Osarian corner was deflected by Joan Marcel, only for the ball to rest on the feet of Osarius' mighty No. 9 who answered with a powerful blast. Second half begun with the Osarians having just made a switch, off going Monroe, in coming Ryan Watson. Had the referee just start the second half, Ryan was already making his move, taking a dent on the defence before fooling Joan Marcel with a switcheroo to hit the Sunrisian's goal. Suffice to say, the Sunrisians were now angry, but things were not to end that way.

As the Osarian defence got somewhat loose for no good reason, Rolandinho Juliano gave them reason to wake up. With the ball, he swiftly dribbled through the middle and a good portion of the defence before scoring a pretty regular shot. The midfielder then dashed towards the camera, yelling "You guys better throw this guy a party!" before returning to his side of the field together with overjoyed team-mates. That brash moment of attitude turned him into a target for recently subbed in Miguel Gomez. After a somewhat messy penalty (somehow Rolandinho Juliano didn't end up injuried from it), the talented colonial Ruby was picked for a penalty shot. And unlike most Sunrisians, Ruby managed to score with a no-nonsense shot to the left as the keeper leaped towards the right side of the goal. After a good number of minutes merely holding it, the Samba Kids did it: they got a win over Osarius.

With this, the Victory Road Warriors are at a 3-1-0 record where, as of now, the only threat remains to be Omerica, the only team also without a defeat. The Sunrisians now prepare for a little trip down memory lane towards Europeia... has that place even warmed to football nowadays?

by **Dreamplanet** » Sun Oct 18, 2015 11:45 pm

Dreamplanet 6-4 RealSquad

A close call

It was the 56th minute, the score was Dreamplanet 3-4 RealSquad. RealSquad was able to take a quite controversial handball goal, and João Pedro could not believe it, Dreamplanet had a 2-0 lead, and at the 40th minute, RealSquad was able to pull level. Then suddenly, Aaron Hungar tries to jump to get the ball from the cross, and falls over and it's a penalty for Dreamplanet, now, i'm not sure if that was a dive, what does the replay say? Luis Silva takes the penalty and scores for Dreamplanet, the fans that were leaving soon came back when they heard a roar of joy at the Estadio Quadrados. Then Luis Silva got his hatrick when he scored from a free kick to make it 5-4. Then finally, A weird occasion happened, in a 90th minute corner, Rafael dos Bosques had a idea to go up for the corner, he got to the ball, headed it in, and GOAL! Dreamplanet were 6-4 up and the final whistle went, the stadium was chanting "How shit must you be? We won 6-4!" And then proceeded to be more optimistic by chanting "Dreamplanet Allez!" And it was a great day for João Pedro in charge... He thought he was going to be sacked if he lost that vital game.

"I think you were the chosen one..." Said Luis Silva while holding the match ball.
"Well, that was a close call, but it was a nice save from you, Rafael when the ball came over from a corner and RealSquad kicked it but you just grabbed it and passed it, and that's how we scored our 4th goal." Said a delighted João Pedro.
"I still think how i saved that, maybe he missed the ball?" Rafael Dos Bosques replied to João's compliments.
"Filipe Vaz, do you wanna go for the Britonisea vs Dreamplanet game in matchday 9?" Said João Pedro when he saw Filipe Vaz
"Yeah, why not? Might aswell give Rafael a chance while i gotta train more." Replied a happy Filipe Vaz.

"Alright lads, our next game is against the Sarian, they might be ranked 6th in our group, but i see this as a close game where we could pick up another win." Said a confident João Pedro, "And don't let anyone push you over, RealSquad wanted to start something, but you showed them who's the bigger man there, let's get a win against The Sarian!"

The squad will be the same as before.
Dreamplanet is now 6th on the group table with 3 points, RealSquad had 1 point from a draw.

works? · by **Abanhfleft** » Mon Oct 19, 2015 2:15 am

The Saga of All-Inclusive Haranguer F.C., Part Five

It was now just two weeks before the start of the football season throughout Abanhfleft. Still, there were questions regarding All-Inclusive Haranguer's transfer process, which so far had resulted only in one single first team signing in Copper Cuprum's Sutalen Desoka. There were many chances for Haranguer to add to their roster following the successful Sporting World Cup tournament, only for the big clubs to beat them to the signatures to some of football's most promising young stars. But all wasn't lost. The Emperor's Cup, a pre-World Cup friendly tournament to be held in the nation of Flardania, was due to start in a few days. Abanhfleft had been invited to the tourney, and that meant all managers of Fleftic teams were looking forward to watching the teams in the tournament play, in the hope of finding that one player that will improve their team.

All-Inclusive Haranguer was one of those teams. Tom Mereilles had already flown over to Flardania to watch as much of the tournament as possible, and he soon found two players that would fit in well with Haranguer's system, or so he believed. The Fairview Islands were a team that seemed to be playing in the international stage for the first time in its history, so he was honestly surprised to see a new team playing in a big tournament, even though it was technically only a friendly tourney. The good news was that every player in the national team, and it is literally every player on the team, were free agents and ripe for the taking. Mereilles had already spotted two good players for Haranguer: a goalkeeper, Louis Simpson, and a striker, Charlie King.

Mereilles had already personally made contact with the players and were in talks to sign them to their new professional contracts. But then something else came up, and then Mereilles turned on the television to see that Athletic Dorfdifving were pleased to announce the signing of both Simpson and King. All that hard work by Tom had come to nothing. But then again, Dorfdifving were already in the Premier League, while Haranguer was still in Unang Liga. Any reasonable player, given the chance, would join a team in a country's top league rather than the second league. It was just the way things were.

"Don't worry about it, hon," Janine Fuller, Mereilles' wife and co-manager of All-Inclusive, said after Tom had arrived back from Flardania. "The Baptism of Fire starts tonight. Maybe we'll finally get lucky and find someone before the big clubs."

"I wouldn't bet a lot on that, Janine," Tom said. "Remember, this is Abanhfleft we're talking about. Every major international tournament is basically hunting time for us managers. Early bird gets the worm and all that."

Strangely enough, there was little coverage of the current Baptism of Fire in Abanhfleft this time around. At most, only matches from Copper Cuprum, that tiny island nation that was basically a Fleftic client state, would be broadcast on CNN Sports. If someone wanted to watch the matches of the other participating nations, they would have to stream it from the Internet. It was a difficult business, managing a football club, but that was why managers existed.

"I think this Sam Gonza guy's good," Tom said from the computer on which he was watching a game between Fluvique and some other nation that he couldn't remember the name of at the moment. "What do you think?"

"Oh, yeah, he definitely looks like a guy that would fit in well with us," Janine replied. "Make contact and ask if they're willing to sell him."

"On it, love."

Meanwhile, on Janine's computer, a blue flashing bar of breaking news popped up, She turned and clicked the link. It said that Thaldor's Larre Torson had asked to place himself on the transfer list. The rumor mill had it that he was valued by his club at N$2.5m, but there were additional rumors that he would be sold for just N$2m, the same price that Haranguer had paid to bring in Sutalen Desoka. This Torson guy would be very much another affordable buy. Janine wrote down Torson's name on the small notebook beside her, below a small but growing list of names.

"Oh, that's just a magnificent save," Mereilles said from his computer. When he felt Janine's eyes on his back he turned around and said, "I'm watching this Estelarian keeper, Daniella Abate, and she looks like a very good keeper. She could definitely be our replacement for Misty."

"Then call her club up!" Janine said. Tom turned back to his computer and set to work. Meanwhile, Janine turned back to her computer and ran her eyes down the statistics of the players competing in the most recent Baptism of Fire. There was one player from Damukuni whom she liked the look of. Her name was Wisdom Tracey, and she was a young and talented midfielder that looked to be the key to setting up a nice attacking unit for Haranguer. Janine wrote down Tracey's name on her new shortlist and scrolled down the statistics sheets to look for more potential players.

At the same time, Tom was watching the highlight reel of the Baptism of Fire final between Fluvique and New Gelderland. It was an opportunity both to see Sam Gonza in action in a big match, and to see if there were any more players that would look like a good fit into Haranguer's squad.

Hang on a minute, he thought as he paused the clip. There was a Gelderlandish player that was impressing him by the minute. All he could see from the grainy video clip was the number on the player's shirt, and even that took a bit of guesswork before Tom could ascertain that it was the number of the player that he wanted for Haranguer. Yes, this was the right guy. Louis Rhodes. That was another player straight to the shortlist.

A few days later, the two of them entered the offices of All-Inclusive Haranguer to find a bunch of emails waiting for them. It was a mix of good news and bad. The good news was that Larre Torson's old club had accepted the N$2m transfer fee that Haranguer had offered, and they were now free to negotiate with the player. Tom immediately looked for Torson's agent and made contact in preparation for the contract negotiations.

The bad news was that some of the players that they had really wanted to bring in to the squad were unavailable for various reasons. New Gelderland's Louis Rhodes was not available for transfer until the next window, although whether that meant the January window or the next postseason window was not made immediately clear in the email. It was also bad news on the Wisdom Tracey front, as it said that all national players of Damukuni were required to play for clubs within the country or else lose their spot on the team. At least that was how Janine Fuller had understood it. There was no reply yet from the inquiry on Daniella Abate.

There was also one email to which they weren't sure how to treat it. It was an email from Alkanter F.C., the club for which Sam Gonza played. It said that they expected a N$7.5m offer before they would think about letting the player go. According to the online transfer valuation sites (which admittedly weren't the best source of information in this kind of thing) Gonza was worth just N$6m, but perhaps his performance for Fluvique had increased that valuation. It was a dilemma for All-Inclusive's managerial staff. With the purchase of Larre Torson (which still wasn't a done deal, but it might as well be) Haranguer's expenses in the transfer window added up to N$4m, meaning they only had N$6m available to buy another player. Thankfully that sum was increased with the midday sale of Neville Weatherley to Oontaznik club Gryphons Nubalochi for N$1m, which meant they now had N$7m in the bank to offer for Gonza. Thus it was with transfer negotiations. The selling club wanted to get the most money out of their player, while the buying club wanted to get the player for the cheapest amount possible. So Janine had fired back an email to Alkanter with a counteroffer of N$7m for Sam Gonza. The next order of business was now to see through the signing of Thaldor's Larre Torson.

Larre Torson was officially unveiled as an All-Inclusive Haranguer player a week before the first game of the season. He was presented to the media wearing the orange-and-black kit of the club, which had earned the club the nickname "the Tigers." He was given number 21, formerly worn by the former Tiger Neville Weatherley. In his press conference, he admitted that when he joined the club he had no idea he was joining the first and currently only mixed-gender team playing in the Fleftic football league system.

"It's going to be an eye-opening experience, I am sure," Torson said in his unveiling. "When I signed for the club I had no idea I was joining such a historic organization. It is an honor to be part of All-Inclusive Haranguer, and watch as they make history here in Abanhfleft.

"I will help them win as many games as they can, win the title and the promotion, and I will be happy for I have made history."

But if Larre Torson was happy, Janine and Tom weren't. Just after they had wrapped up the press conference for Torson's introduction to the club, they had come back to their office with a new email from Alkanter. And it didn't contain the news that they wanted.

FROM: ALKANTER F.C.
TO: JANINE FULLER, ALL-INCLUSIVE HARANGUER F.C.

Ms. Fuller,

We have reviewed the offer you have made for Sam Gonza. Unfortunately we cannot go ahead with the deal because we do not believe that the offered cash sum is enough. If you increase the cash offer to NS$7,500,000, we would be willing to let Sam Gonza go.

Regards,
Alkanter F.C. Chief Executive

"They want 7.5 million," Janine told Tom.

"Damn it," Tom muttered. "Where are we gonna get that money? I don't know anyone else on the team we can possibly sell for 500 thousand."

"I think I have a way," a voice spoke up from behind them.

CRESCENT NEWS NETWORK
SPORTS CHANNEL - OFFICIAL WEBSITE
ABANHFLEFT • PRIDNESTROVIA • OONTAZ DERT LI NG • COPPER CUPRUM • TRENDSTART • FHULGHAMOUS PENINSULA

WORLD CUP 73 QUALIFIERS: ABANHFLEFT VS WITTY PENGUINS
By Malik Qazizadah

Abanhfleft's Kevin Kelvin and Gustavo Potter celebrate Kelvin's goal. He and Valery Zolnerov found the net to give the Revolutionaries a win over Witty Penguins. (Courtesy of Crescent News Network Sports Channel/Andros Tasasa)

WANDA CITY, WANDA ISLAND - It was another calm and collected victory for Abanhfleft as they played hosts to visiting Witty Penguins, with Kevin Kelvin and Valery Zolnerov netting to give the Democratic Republic all three points.

Kelvin netted his third goal of the campaign after going on the break, catching the then-tight Penguinish defense unawares, latching onto a Luke Edwards long ball, and poking the ball past the keeper with his toe.

Zolnerov headed in the free kick from midfield partner Rory Edwards to double Abanhfleft's lead over the Penguinish just minutes from the end of the game.

While Witty Penguins' defense was at work throughout the match and kept the scoreline respectable, the lack of clinical finishing and goalscoring ruthlessness was also very clear to both Fleftic and Penguinish spectators, with the Penguinish players taking too long on the ball and sometimes not bothering to pass to an open player in favor of resetting the play.

Troy Cornet had the best chance in the game to pull one back for the visitors, with his 32-yard shot being palmed over the bar by Maksim Varamoninov in an otherwise routine save.

And Abanhfleft could very well have been three goals up had Roman Garley not been there to head Gustavo Potter's sidefooted attempt off of the line and out of the immediate danger zone.

In the end it was a well-fought match in which the host and higher-ranked side deserved all three points.

Abanhfleft manager Kasper Molak: Team gave home fans good match

Abanhfleft manager Kasper Molak: "I've got nothing but good words to say to my players. They gave the home fans a good match, and the away fans didn't shrink away from the atmosphere. They were vocal for their side through thick and thin, and I have to commend them for that.

"Kevin [Kelvin] is really turning into a superb center forward for us. Adelmio Bandini [manager of Malabon S.C.] is doing wonders with the kid. I won't be surprised if Kelvin's our new captain in the coming years.

"Valery [Zolnerov] was great as well. He's really in sync with Rory Edwards now. They're unstoppable on the pitch, the two of them are. I see them to be the national team's backbone in the future.

"You gotta hand it to the Penguinish. They had the tenacity and heart to hang on to the game until the final whistle. [Roman] Garley was just superb. I wouldn't be surprised if a club made an offer for him in January."

In other Group 18 news, Makhlohi Vai and New Gelderland drew 0-0, along with Cuboneland and Saintland. Abanhfleft is off to the United States of Devonta for the next qualifying game, and the Devontans will be expected to come out strong, having had a bye day today.

    ABANHFLEFT 2 - 0 WITTY PENGUINS
  KELVIN (33')
ZOLNEROV (78')

WITTY PENGUINS
GK: 01 Johnson
RB: 17 Carson (Cobb - 50')
RCB: 18 Howard
LCB: 03 Strathmore
LB: 02 Garley
CM: 06 Walter
CM: 07 Knight
RAM: 15 Cornet
CAM: 11 Fort (Thorpe - 73')
LAM: 14 Whitfield
ST: 09 Gunther (Martinez - 80')

ABANHFLEFT
GK: 01 Varamoninov
RB: 05 Amoroso (Cervantes - 82')
RCB: 04 L. Edwards
LCB: 03 Mikkelsen
LB: 02 Samonte
RM: 08 Turpentine
CM: 19 Zolnerov
LM: 06 Musa (Rice - 67')
CAM: 20 R. Edwards
RS: 11 Kelvin
LS: 10 Potter

MATCH STATISTICS
Possession
Abanhfleft: 58%
Witty Penguins: 42%
Shots
Abanhfleft: 10 (4 on target)
Witty Penguins: 3 (1 on target)
Corners
Abanhfleft: 10
Witty Penguins: 4
Fouls
Abanhfleft: 10
Witty Penguins: 9

by **Copper Cuprum** » Mon Oct 19, 2015 2:39 am

From the diary of Prince Deg

3 January 2016
The team has now landed in Saaksvala. This appears to be an easy and academical win. Even my stupid centerbacks can't possibly make us lose this game. Let's make every minute count. LET'S DO THIS!

(The following entry appears to have been made just a few minutes after the end of the game between Copper Cuprum and Saaksvala. Sweat stains and some chicken blood are throughout the pages of the diary in this segment.)

As I said, a good win, and a good confidence boost for the team. Muar-Gear-Rhit is getting satisfied with us once again after we began offering real chicken's blood once again. This is a great step forward for the Copperite Football Association. Not even Setobi Bonoyok's stupid own goal can bring me down from the happiness in my stomach lifting me up to the heavens. Onwards and upwards, Copper Cuprum! TO THE NEXT GAME!

CRESCENT NEWS NETWORK
SPORTS CHANNEL - OFFICIAL WEBSITE
ABANHFLEFT • PRIDNESTROVIA • OONTAZ DERT LI NG • COPPER CUPRUM • TRENDSTART • FHULGHAMOUS PENINSULA

WORLD CUP 73 QUALIFIERS: SAAKSVALA VS COPPER CUPRUM
By Malik Qazizadah

Saaksvala's players scramble to get the ball. Copper Cuprum earned its first World Cup qualifying win against Saaksvala with a 3-1 victory. (Courtesy of Crescent News Network Sports Channel/Andros Tasasa)

SAAKSVALA - Copper Cuprum earned its first three points in the World Cup qualifiers with a composed win over Saaksvala.

Prince Deg of Copper Cuprum netted first, striking from distance within 70 seconds to give Copper Cuprum the lead just two minutes after kickoff.

Opatop Lazarovski netted his first goal of the competition just a few minutes before half-time, turning in the shot from Prince Deg that would have gone across the mouth of goal.

Tyrone Zudazet completed the rout with a savage header that sent both the ball and the opposing keeper into the back of the net.

But Copper Cuprum were unable to keep the clean sheet as Setobi Bonoyok headed into his own net while defending from a Saaksvalan free kick.

         SAAKSVALA 1 - 3 COPPER CUPRUM
BONOYOK (73') (og)       PRINCE DEG (2')
                         LAZAROVSKI (40')
                         ZUDAZET (82')

World Cup 73 - RPing Thread

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