World Cup 85 || RP Thread

[Trolleborg]

Previous parts of the story: 1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 - 8


Naomi and Wesley, without further ado, rushed to run in a straight line from the approaching clank, and the invisible shooter with tracers for some reason took aim just above their heads, so for a few seconds it seemed to them that the direct threat had receded. Сlanking quickly caught up with them, but it went to the right, and something huge and box-like with a really long muzzle appeared through the fog, blowing stinky smoke over tourists, and moving somewhere further with angry growling, and then tracer lines stretched out, now not one but with a good half dozen. And then tourists stumbled upon someone in a battered, indescribably dirty uniform and a shabby, scale-covered helmet, who goes from the right.

“Follow me, fast!” - He screamed in a wild voice. “Into the trench!! They will begin now!!”
Without understanding anything, the tourists rushed after him, flew into a ditch, dug in the middle of the forest and fortified with logs, and just then shells burst with a booming buzz throughout around, one burst so close that clods of earth and some tree branches fell on Wesley and Naomi.

“This cannot be really, this door can’t lead into a time machine!” - Wesley muttered with a tongue-twister, choking on in horror, scrubbing greasy soil from under his collar and shaking dry foliage from his hair.
“Run! Now they will shoot right here!” - shouted someone who brought them into the trench and take a lead. And they ran after, along this dirty trench, where something crunched and squished underfoot, past the dead soldier, almost whole covered with earth so that only his boots and one twisted arm stuck out, into a bigger entrenchment where soldiers are making their preparations for attack, and further, right to the solidly-build dugout.
“You!” - guide pointed a finger at Wesley – “Help him!” - and shook his head in the direction of an elderly man, who shouldered seemingly heavy iron thing.
“And you!” – pointed finger this time at Naomi. – “Grab the bag and care for the wounded!”
Even if the guests from Zwangzug had found something to argue, they would not have been able to do it anyway, since something murderous and smoky exploded next to them with a nasty howl, and next to Wesley's head some piece of iron came into the wall of the trench with a disgusting screech.

And they rushed to fulfill the order – enemy is already highly visible right now.

[Maccian]

Chapter 4:

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

After Maccian's 0-0 draw against A Flock of Seagulls, President Petchre Mackay made his way into his limo which would take him back to Benekkia Romendes. Earlier on in the year, he had announced that he would not be running for a second term despite being incredibly popular among Maccians. This was only natural as he did found the nation after all. The Maccian Centrist Party had Elliot Summers campaigning for the presidency, but having him running for such a prestigious position considering him, shall we say, a controversial figure. There was no way he'd ever be considered as a serious candidate so it is safe to say the future president will not be from the Maccian Centrist Party. Petchre Mackay's decision to not run again has essentially created a power vacuum which the People's Communist Party, Maccian New Order or the Maccian Nationalist Party- parties from the extreme left and right- would certainly exploit. A bodyguard opened the limo door for him and Petchre stepped inside.

"Well, well, well Petchre. I honestly didn't expect you to be here. It's a shame that the team drew today, it seems that our luck is starting to run out. Aye, I remember it being only yesterday I was tearing shit up for the national team. It's a long way from our Baptism of Fire days, ain't it?," said Jozy Dembele, smirking.

"Shut up and let's get to business. I know that "George Anpoise" is an agent from Baker Park here to destabilise this great country here for your selfish gains. That being said, I could save you all the trouble," declared Petchre. He was disinterested in the conversation as his eyes gazed at the emerald green spaces of Audoti. Jozy Dembele leaned forward in intrigue and stroked his beard, perhaps as a way to ponder how he would approach the situation.

"Well, it depends on what you're proposing," began Jozy. Exasperated, Petchre groaned and rolled his eyes. He then glared at Jozy, prompting him to carry on. "Now please correct me, but if you knew about this shit long ago, why are you agreeing to meet me so soon? Aren't you considering the national security of 'Maccian'?" Petchre's piercing eyes looked as if they were consumed by a raging fire.

"First of all, I'd think you'd prefer that I negotiate with you rather than rounding up all those involved including your little friend 'James Knight. Secondly, the reason I'm meeting with you right now is about Maccian. You, me and all the other South Torontons escaped the anarchist hellhole that South Toronto soon became when it ceased to exist and we came here for a better life and future. I founded Maccian basing it off of South Toronto's ideals, at least before the communist scum took over. But just because I won't forget the past, doesn't mean I will allow treason to fester in this nation. So by me meeting you, I am ensuring the safety of Maccians all around by not letting people like you attempt to establish your colony here."

"Nice little speech you just gave there. Have you been practising it? Oh, don't get me wrong, I'm touched you want to impress me with your great philosophical speech but you are not talking about what I am here for. I want South Toronton rule here. Baker Park clearly wants South Toronton rule here considering the fact that they are funding us. Hopefully, we can see eye-to-eye."

" Well, 'm going to be out of the politics of the country, it is too suffocating. The stress is too much. I'm taking my wife and kids out of here as soon as ya'll come into power. Do not for one second think that I'm endorsing you guys into taking over. I've become disillusioned with the nation, having to lie to the citizens every fucking day whilst I'm abandoning my core principles for the sake of securing funding for the party. Soon I'll be out of here for good. Maybe I'll find a nice nation where I can retire with my family"

"Really? Well, I'll be damned! And to think I was going to kill your son!"

"What!? You were going to do fucking what?"

"Don't worry, it was just Eries I was talking about. Even if I did, would you have cared though? Because ou only mentioned he was your son after he came out with the truth. Which he found. Because of his mum. That kid is blessed, could you imagine being the son of a footballer, president and leader of a counter-terrorism force? Don't worry though, I'll spare him. The rest of your family are fine. Look, you don't need to leave. Stay."

"And why should I?"

"Where the hell are you going to go? You might as well stay here and enjoy the revolution. In fact, this shit could be over today if we co-operated with each other. James Knight could go home literally tomorrow and we will owe Baker Park greatly. You've just got to listen to me."

"You still haven't given me a proper reason to stay. You being insistent on me staying makes me very suspicious. How do I know you don't have any ulterior motives if I do stay? You could just slaughter me and my family to divide Maccians and then you would step in as the 'almighty unifying force' and take over."

"I could. But I'm a man of my word, so you can trust me when I say ya'll will be safe. Now listen to me. We are going to take over Maccian no matter what, democratically or through a coup. Now if they vote for, let's say the Maccian New Order, we will only have to make that puppet announce that South Toronto is alive and kicking. Anyone who will resist our rule will soon find out what life is like under an authoritarian state. I'm sure you wouldn't want that for the population, would you?"

"Get to the fucking point Jozy, because you're really starting to piss me off."

" Alright, no need to get your panties in a bunch! Listen, this is what we'll do. When those fans come back from West Pocono, we unleash the beast on them. A mass shooting at an airport will mean that we can pass laws by decree such as a curfew and banning fans from attending New Lambridge. Now everyone watching the game is at home. Then all channels are changed to a government broadcast where we announce we are the new government. Naturally, we'd have to purge the old government, but that can be done tonight! We just say all important government officials are meeting in an undisclosed place and boom, no dissent! If you won't be the leader, I'll just have someone else assume the role then. Perhaps Ruitawa or Timofeé Karcermarskásagusson. I would prefer the latter of the two, Timofeé. What do you think of the plan?"

"You are not serious! How deluded are you? Why are you proposing killing hundreds, possibly even thousands of innocent people? You're goddamn insane!"

"You are right. We are both deluded into thinking that we can make differences in this nation. Fortunately for South Torontons across Maccian, you are the only twat in power that stands in our way. I've been prepared for this. I should have died a long time ago with the rest of our deceased brothers and sisters."

"I- I cannot understand you. Did you always speak in such a confusing and incoherent manner?" asked Petchre. Jozy opened his mouth before his cellphone rang. He picked it up and answered the phone, making sure to put it on the loudspeaker.

"Hello? Is it Jozy speaking?" said the voice.

"Yep, it is. James, you can go back home now. The job is done. I know you haven't gotten as involved as you would have liked but hey, that's life! Farewell, and I wish you like in all your future endeavours!" replied Jozy before he abruptly hung up the phone.

"What's going on, why are you telling your co-conspirator to leave Maccian?"

"Because it's already over. You lost. We won. Like a car in a dojo."

"Huh? As far as I'm concerned, nothing is won nor lost. And what the fuck is that simile?" asked Petchre. Jozy chuckled and murmured something under his breath. The limo veered across the road and into a cliff, where the limo twirled around in the air. The limo plunged downwards the jagged rocks below.

[Vdara]

Can they make it three?

It was another tough game for Vdara, as they were playing away against Jamestownnnn. Although Jamestownnnn may not be the best in the group, the pressure from Væñøœrëñbérghüïś was enough to strike fear into some of the players.

“Lads, we need to f**king win this game.” Væñøœrëñbérghüïś began, “If we want to have a slight amount of hope for remaining in the top five, we absolutely have to gain victory. Ya got me? Good. Now, Jamestownnnn. Let’s talk about them. They’re admittedly quite a rubbish side, and yous should be able to beat them. Any win is a good win, as long as you have a one goal margin. They’re a bit weak in defence, but they have quite the talented attack. Beware of that. Their midfield is, well, a bit rubbishy and all. It’s just the attack you need to be wary of. Capische? Good. Let’s get out there and win this one, boys!”

The match report is as follows:

1: The whistle has been blown, and the ball has been kicked!
3: Vlahiades has made an amazing run here, he’s still going forward, he’s crossed it into Lazelis... who puts it in the goal with an overhead kick! Great shot for the cameramen, and great shot from Chirstoforos Lazelis! 1-0 to Vdara, and so early in the game too!
8: Mavroglou has the ball here in the middle of the park, and he’s moving with it. He goes to run forward, passes to Fotellis... but the pass is intercepted by one of the defenders.
13: Jamestownnnn have got the ball to one of their attackers, they’re running right through the Vdaran defence... and they’ve scored! It’s even stevens here in Jamestownnnn, and Vdara will have to get another one in!
20: Vdara have the ball down in their third of the pitch, and they’re passing it around. Xeniadis lobs it to Karalas, who flicks it over to Fotellis... who is yet again dispossessed.
27: Woah, that’s a rubbish tackle, and one of the Jamestownnnn players has gained themselves a yellow card! He’s treading on thin ice now!
35: Lazelis is making a fantastic run from the middle of the pitch, he’s rounded the defence, he’s one on one with the goalkeeper, he does a roulette to the left and back heels it... into the net! Vdara are ahead yet again, and who can blame them? What a fantastic goal!
45: And the referee blows the whistle for halftime, and Vdara lead at the break following a great performance by the young Chirstoforos Lazelis!

The dressing room was filled with murmurs of excitement and praise, mainly for Lazelis, who had just scored 2. At this point, Væñøœrëñbérghüïś kicked the door open dramatically and began speaking.

”Chirstoforos, that has to be one of the best goals I’ve seen in my life, and I’ve scored many good goals, y’know? I mean, the technique, the skill, the pace, mmmmmmm! If you could pull that off in the second half, I’d be pleased! As for the rest of you, keep your head in the game. We may be leading at half time, but that doesn’t necessarily mean we’ll be leading at full time without any effort, right? Good. Let’s finish those f**kers off!”

46: And Vdara kicks off this second half, leading Jamestownnnn by two goals to one!
61: Giannakos has the ball in his own third, and he’s passed it to Athanas. Athanas is going for a run forward from the right side, he’s still going, he’s put a lovely cross into the box and Fotellis hits it on the volley... into the stands behind the goal. Shame, too.
70: Jamestownnnn have got the ball to one of their attackers and they’re pushing forward yet again. The midfield has been rounded, the defence has been rounded... but not David Xeniadis! The young centreback snatches the ball with a well executed slide tackle in the box!
79: Fotellis has intercepted a bad pass from one of the Jamestownnnn defenders, he’s running forward and... his shot is saved by the keeper.
89: Jamestownnnn are on the attack yet again, they’ve put in a great cross from the right side and... it’s in! Jamestownnnn draw level with Vdara in the dying minutes of the game! Does this spell the end of Vdara’s hopes for a win?
90: Vdara have got the ball for kickoff, and they’re moving it quickly. Fotellis puts it to Lazelis, who begins to move forward, he’s making another fantastic run, he flicks up the shot outside the box, keeps it in the air and hits it on the volley... into the back of the net! Straight from the kickoff! Vdara have went from conceding one at their own end to scoring one at the other in only a minute! The 3 points must be wrapped up now!

The referee blew the whistle for full time, and the players were overjoyed. Væñøœrëñbérghüïś even ran into the pitch and embraced Lazelis, who had managed to get a hat trick and score the last goal.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you! Jesus f**king Christ, thank you!”

Following this celebration, the players went back into the dressing room happier than they had came out of it, Væñøœrëñbérghüïś included.

“That was f**king spectacular! I didn’t think you could do it, but you did! The fans will have loved that performance, and I did too! Fantastic result, lads! However, let’s not deal on it too much. We’ve got another match to deal with, and it’s going to be a tough one. Even though it’s at home, Ancherion are a tough side, and they’ll be difficult to beat. I’d be happy if yous got a draw out of the next one, to be fair. Anyhow, let’s get this show on the road and get back to Chania, we gotta be ready for our next game!”

[Eraman]

CHAPTER 5
THE WORLD CUP

With domestic football league halted for security reasons, the national team were called up earlier to camp in the much safer, Daulapura.

The prime minister who took over halfway around last edition's World Cup qualifiers decided to lift all bans on senior national team players. The national team will finally have its full strength.

The national team started the preparation with the CMFA Nations League and finished third-placed behind Ziwana and Pemecutan.

It was a good run out for a team that was filled with not match-fit players.

And then the real deal arrived. Eraman was drawn in Group 13 alongside 12 other nations with Valanora, Pasarga, Juvencus and recently crowned Baptism of Fire champion, Mavinet being the most notable nation.

Eraman started the campaign with a trip to Pangurstan. It was a nervy encounter as both sides focus on the offensive side of the game leaving the back vulnerable. By half-time, it was already 3-all with a goal each from Buisan Buayan, Putra Daulapura Suara Petara and Kilat Saputra. The goal in the injury time by veteran striker Buisan Buayaan sealed the 3 points for Eraman. Eraman won 4-3.

The recently crowned Baptism of Fire champion, Mavinet was the opponent for Eraman in its first home match. The match was held in Daulapura where protesters have calmed down. In fact, by the time Mavinet arrived in the city, there were hardly any signs of major protest happened in the recent past.

It was another nervy encounter. A brace for Kilat Saputra and a goal each from Buisan Buayan and Rimau Belang helped the national team to overcome Mavinet by 4-3. The atmosphere in the dressing room was at an all-time high having acquired six points from two games.

[Chromatika]

Chromatik City Courier
Jordan Lawless, Sports Columnist

Group 3 Matchday 8: Eshan 1-2 Chromatika @ Eshan
Chromatik Scorers: Victoriane '56, Mora '85
Starting XI (4-2-3-1): Ria; Xiao - de Aea - Will - Ilya; Armageddon - Dias; Victoriane - Mora - Dragana; Andisori (C).
Substitutes: Kelly -> Victoriane ('48), Rowles -> Ilya ('67), Sierra -> Andisori ('81)
Projected Starting XI vs. (228) Alba and Cymru (2-2-3) @ The Cove, Lhor (51,265; 28,000 Seats): Tioux; Ruth - Rondeau - Ibex - Rowles; Kim, M.S. - Avis; Etienne - Gail - Han; Vidal (C).

ESHAN -

The Chromatik Anomalies are starting to make strides toward a more respectful presence in Group 3 after Hermaeus Mora got the ball past the keeper for the deciding score.

Though the result keeps the team down to a dismal record of tenth place, it is an upward trend - and keeps Chromatika within nine points of that elusive second placed berth.

When asked about the prospects of the team moving forward, the following people had this to say:

"It feels good to win again, for sure - and on a late-occurring goal as well," states Hermaeus Mora about his last strike, a looping one that fooled the keeper to go one way before sneaking in, "We will use it to be a stepping stone for the rest of the campaign. We're starting to regain a lot of our past form - the killer instinct, the communication, all of it. I still think that the best football for Chromatika is ahead of us."

"It's a bit too soon to be celebrating," comments Konrad Evans, who has been hearing more and more people complain about the campaign has the results have continued to flow, "But I will remind everyone that we are only through eight of twenty- four games, or a third of our matches. Yes, it's true that we've only gotten seven out of the first twenty-four points, but there are so many more out there, so hold on to that."

"It is only a matter of time," states Enigma Armageddon regarding the lack of goals scored so far through the campaign, "The five that plays on top of the four are getting better, and will continue to do so.

[Independent Athletes from Quebec]

OOC : This graphic RP is made as a response to this post. ICly it is set that tyears later, a film was made out of the Mega Bomba.

Check here for the very poster. It won't let me load it here!

[Balqia]

— It wasn’t that bad.
She put a cupcake in her mouth, the look on Erna’s face was saying the opposite.
— Yeah, yeah…
— Something is bothering you?
It took a while to the cold gaze leave her eyes, but they did after some seconds frozen in a woman with cupcake all over her face.
— Oh, sorry. The interview was great, you nailed it.
— So why do you have this look in your face?
— Ah… err… it’s because… — she was trying to articulate something, after a few tries she successfully said an entire sentence — It’s because we are going far worse than anticipated.
— But you just work with public image.
“What do you mean by ‘Just’?”, that’s what she imagined Erna would’ve said, but she just smiled and answered very calmly.
— It’s kinda difficult to make excuses to why the team don’t win. It’s even more difficult when you are speaking with the Sports Ministry, who is eager to cut budget in the first thing that don’t is useful as propaganda.
Both of them kept silent, eventually Erna left the set, leaving Mary alone with the crew from the show. Staying there just would make her bored and a little more fat, all those cupcakes and sandwiches were a temptation. Outside was brighter, warmer and less dangerous for her diet.
— Hey!
— Oh, hi Fran.
Riviera appeared from nowhere.
— I can’t believe they record in real houses!
— They told me it’s more honest with the public, not like the ‘fake capitalist countries’.
Both of them laughed with Mary’s attempt to imitate a balqese accent in balqese.
— Well, how ‘re thin’s goin’?
— Pretty bad, Erna is very upset because the team don’t win or something.
— They’re just makin’ excuses. The last game was pretty good to.
— Not enough, apparently.
The tie wasn’t expected. The forwards struggled to advance time and time again, and when they reached a favorable spot the ball was stolen or the shot missed. When the second half ended Berka almost had a stroke from anger.
— Don’t worry, they’re goin’ to win soon enough.
— I hope so. So, what are you doing here?
— I do the subs. They broadcast with five seconds of delay, so I have a little span of time to translate.
— Wait, this program is livestream?
— Yup!
Now she almost got a stroke, no one told that to her, for all Rockwell knew they were going to edit that before showing it on television.
— Just how many languages do you speak?
— Seven. But that’s countin’ english.
Someone told her that Riviera was a polyglot during a conversation, but Mary took it as a joke. But as they say, never judge a book by it’s cover.
— So, do you wanna to watch the next match together?
— On the television?
— No, in the stadium, dummy.
— In West Angola? Can we do that?
— We’re part of the team, so yes.
And so they had a match to see together. It was funny how she worked as a representative of the team but never saw them in person or talked with the staff. Now at least she could enjoy the good parts of her job.

[Zwangzug]

Mushroom clouds are orangish-gray
Nuclear proliferation is a danger
Randomness can be strange
But a lot of your plotlines are stranger.

MD9 scores for groups 9-15.

[Jeckland]

EELS SLIP LATE GOAL PAST STAUNCH JECKLAND DEFENCE

Turori left it late to claim victory over Jeckland, with an 84th minute goal from Lati’ala Giaoka proving the difference between the two sides.

The Spuds decided to recall Gibbs in place of Sanderson, opting to set up in a flatter 4-3-3 as a result. The move, aimed to limit Turori’s attack, ultimately led to a thoroughly unexciting start to the game, which suited the away side perfectly. Only one shot was registered in the first 20 minutes, Moafalia missing from long range.

The three Jeckish midfielders outnumbered the Turori pair, allowing them to cut passing lanes to the strikers. In addition, Dane and Martel functioned as orthodox wide midfielders in their defensive position, leaving banks of four and five with Stack harrying the ball up front. Despite this, the Eels had some better chances leading up to half time, with Iretziia having a shot blocked by Gilbert before Clemens was on hand to snuff out a cross headed straight for the boot of Aikiki.

Jeckland went in at half time having not had a shot on goal, but more importantly with the scores still level. Whilst it was not in Jeckish nature to park the bus, Ross realised that a point from this game was a huge result. That did not mean that trying to score was off the table, as shown by Martel bursting into space just two minutes after the resumption of play. The young winger showed his age with some poor decision making, opting to square to Stack who had a defender in front of him rather than shoot himself from the angle. Edgeli was easily able to stick a boot out and block the shot, but at least the Spuds were off the mark in that regard.

Despite the attack buoying the Jeckish support, the game soon settled into much the same pattern as in the first half. Jeckland were running hard off the ball to close off passing lanes, with the Eels having to try to zip the ball around faster to get by. Whilst initially the Spuds were able to handle this, cracks started to appear as the away side visibly tired compared to the group leaders. Aikiki had a snapshot caught by Clemens, Mpala’a headed over from a corner, and Toru’u hit the post from a tight angle as Turori laid siege to the Jeckland goal with a series of fast paced attacks.

Jeckland were hanging on for dear life, but it was only a matter of time before the goal came. Iretzilla received the ball facing away from goal, before a deft flick into the path of Giaoka left an open shot at goal, which was dispatched with aplomb into the bottom left corner. Jeckland’s lack of energy meant they never stood a chance of earning their point back, with a wild shot over the bar from range by Gibbs the closest the Spuds would come to levelling.

After the match, a fringe of Jeckish fans on social media suggested that the Turori side were more energised due to their alleged usage of Cocoa-bo, which has been rumoured to be performance enhancing. Jeckland manager Kayden Ross poured cold water on these claims. “There is no evidence that Cocoa-bo is performance enhancing or that Turori players drank any before the game, so I’m not having that as an excuse. My boys played their hearts out out there, if they keep doing that for the rest of the qualifiers we’ll be in a good place come the end of it.” Jeckland face a key match at home against Astograth next. Whilst the Olives have started strongly, Jeckland will be looking at this as an opportunity to take points from a team above them in the table.

OOC: Lineup for next match is as in roster but with Hodson instead of Grey.

ELSEWHERE IN GROUP 1

It was very fucking boring. Three 0-0 draws, with New Lusitania failing to beat Villablanca, Astograth and Sajnur sharing the spoils, and Necosia gaining their second point against Natanians and Nosts. In mildly more interesting news, Muradil lost at home to Porticalia, making Audioslavia’s 3-0 win over Euran Oceanic Territories the most interesting game of the matchday, largely thanks to a post match outburst by Sean Patterick.

RESULTS

New Lusitania 0–0 Villablanca
Necosia 0–0 Natanians and Nosts
Turori 1–0 Jeckland
Astograth 0–0 Sajnur
Muradil 1–2 Porticalia
Audioslavia 3–0 Euran Oceania Territories

TABLE

-  Group 1                                     Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Turori                                        7    7   0   0    22    6  +16    21
 2 Audioslavia                                   7    5   0   2    12    4   +8    15
 3 Sajnur                                        8    4   3   1    21   18   +3    15
 4 Astograth                                     7    4   2   1    13    5   +8    14
 5 New Lusitania                                 8    3   3   2    15   13   +2    12
 6 Natanians and Nosts                           7    2   4   1    14   11   +3    10
 7 Porticalia                                    8    2   3   3     7   12   −5     9
 8 Muradil                                       7    2   2   3    12   13   −1     8
 9 Jeckland                                      7    2   2   3    13   16   −3     8
10 TJUN-ia                                       7    2   1   4    13   13    0     7
11 Villablanca                                   7    1   3   3     6   12   −6     6
12 Euran Oceania Territories                     8    1   1   6    14   28  −14     4
13 Necosia                                       8    0   2   6     7   18  −11     2

Turori open up a six point lead at the top of the table, looking very strong to qualify as group winners. Behind them there’s a scrabble as Audioslavia, Sajnur, Astograth and New Lusitania all look to be fighting for second spot, with the teams below hoping to put together a run of form and crash the party.

MATCHDAY 9 FIXTURES

Porticalia (7th) vs. Audioslavia (2nd) - The Bulls can ill afford another slip up. They should have enough to win, but Porticalia have been a surprise package.

Sajnur (3rd) vs. Muradil (8th) - Similar story here as the hosts look to keep up the fight at the top of the table.

Jeckland (9th) vs. Astograth (4th) - The Spuds will fancy themselves for this one despite the Olives strong performances thus far.

Natanians and Nosts (6th) vs. Turori (1st) - Blah blah blah, can anyone stop Turori? Blah blah blah, no.

Villablanca (11th) vs. Necosia (13th) - A battle at the bottom that the hosts will expect to win.

TJUN-ia (10th) vs. New Lusitania (5th) - Both sides have shown glimpses of good and bad play so far, so this one is hard to predict.

Euran Oceania Territories have a day off to lick their wounds.

---

THE CHICKEN CHRONICLES - PART SIX

Woody Hamm closed his laptop, thoughts swirling in his head. He’d never stooped to this level before, but he’d never faced this kind of challenge before.

The narrow loss to Turori had sparked a small uproar amongst a section of Jeckish fans, convinced Cocoa-bo was at the root of the result. This reduced the risk of the idea he’d dismissed out of hand before the match. If caught, the public may be more sympathetic to his cause. The reward of course, remained the more unknown thing, but could potentially be great - if one of the most well known brands in the multiverse were tarnished, that would create more space for another. That could be Jecken. Hamm knew he was not operating in the same sub sector as the drinks manufacturer, but clearing room in the food and drink industry had to be a good thing. And Hamm thought he knew how to do it.

He couldn’t be detected at all, as what he was doing was probably - no definitely very illegal. So instead of opening his laptop again, he pulled a sheet of paper from his draw, grabbed a pen, and began to write a letter.

Dear Sir Barsanuphius The Bold

I hope this letter finds you well. I have been following your campaign against the evils of Cocoa-bo for some time, and believe I could be of assistance.

My name is Woody Hamm, and I am the CEO of Jecken, the biggest company in Jeckland, which provides those in our nation and beyond with the national delicacy, Jeckish Chicken. To cut a long story short, I’m a very wealthy man with some very big interests, one of which is that Cocoa-bo is banned.

Whilst my reasons may not be the exact same as yours, I believe we can help each other here. As they say, the enemy of my enemy is my friend, which makes us friends. I would be willing to offer you significant financial support in your efforts. This money could be used to spread the truth about Cocoa-bo and ensure this vile substance is ridded from us for good. Of course, I cannot be in any way associated with this publicly due to the conflict of interest involved, but rest assured I will be backing you heavily behind the scenes, should you choose to accept my offer.

Hope to hear from you soon

Woody Hamm

CEO, Jecken

---

Eight

How had it come to this?

I was sat alone in my uni room, drunk, with my flatmates leaving to spend a night out on the town. I had no one to blame for this but myself. I wanted to go out, I really did, but I just couldn’t do it. Not after what happened earlier.

It seemed like a non event to anyone not occupying the twisted reality that was my mind. Dannie was asked to rate the lads in the room from best to worst as part of a drinking game with some of his friends from home who’d come for the weekend. We usually only played beer pong, but the girls he’d brought with him didn’t fancy that, so some weird truth telling game was played instead. I hated this kind of thing, always paranoid at what people would think of my answers.

He rated me last, because “You’re never here anymore, unless its for football.”

This was where the two sides of my brain came into play. The rational one and the emotional one. Here’s what they said to me in this situation.

Rational: It’s just a joke, he likes everyone here and had to put someone last. Laugh it off and move on.

Emotional: You idiot, you’re never in the kitchen because you’re too busy being sad. You’re going to push away all your friends. That was probably the truth disguised as a joke, you fucking loser. You need to go and be sad now. You need to cry. Go and cry, you little bitch.

The emotional side always won. Pretending I felt sick, I turned in for the night. In reality, I sat up for an hour, listening to the laughs coming from the room down the hall as the rest carried on without me.

I was broken, but in a way I couldn’t even begin to understand.

[Astograth]

Previously

Astograth 0-0 Sajnur
Iturributa, Astograth, Old City Stadium (attendance: 70,034)

Lineup: Anzizar, Remondegi, Leskerre, Doyenard, Narke ©, Lizarza, Lekea, Urkizo, Sorrosua, Duarte, Urdanibia
Substitutions: Martel for Remondegi, E. Laurnagaray for Leskerre, Yrigoy for Sorrosua

---

Aratz Anzizar stretched and shook his limbs, slapped his chest and thighs, and clapped his gloved hands. Around him, Old City Stadium quivered with anticipation for the second half to kick off. It was a familiar feeling. This was home, after all. That’s what he’d told Lazaga.

“What is ‘home’, to you?”, he’d been asked by Lazaga. Anzizar had hesitated. “You’re from Urbitzo, you said?”

“Yeah. Well, that’s home, and Iturributa’s home. And anywhere that there’s Sporting fans, you’d be surprised.

“What do you mean?”

“Oh, just, you know. There’s Sporting fans in places you’d never expect, and they always make you feel at home”.

“In places such as?”

“Anywhere we go here in Astograth, for one, but abroad too, you know. In Audioslavia there was a group of them, I don’t know if they lived there or get there before us, but they were there… in Turori, too. In the other qualifiers I’ve played and now for IFCF too, they’re always with us. It’s a good feeling, not being alone”.

The referee’s whistle pierced the warm air of Iturributa, and the concrete bowl that was Old City shook with the roar of seventy thousand cheers as Sajnur played the ball.

“Does Rumiatzi feel like home? When you’re training there, or when you come back from a trip, for example?”

Anzizar had laid back, thinking. “Maybe? Sort of. The national team feels like home, and it’s a relief to land there, but I have no real feelings for Rumiatzi. I guess Astograth in general is ‘home’, when I’m away from it”.

“Interesting, OK. Now another topic, if you don’t mind. I’ve been walking around Old City Stadium, thinking about its history, its tenants, the players who’ve been there. Do you have any thoughts about it?”

“About the stadium? It’s good, I like it. It’s the most atmospheric, in my opinion, because it doesn’t have the track like at Grand Duke’s or Ituraitz. Knights’ I just don’t like. That might be my bias,” he’d laughed. “Ximun Orieta’s very good too, very historic, very intimate, the fans are right there next to you. Not the best thing for a goalkeeper, though, when you’re playing away. Silanes Park is cool too. But Old City’s special, and I knew that before I ever joined Sporting”.

“What would you say makes it special?”

Was this girl for real? “I mean, you’ve been there, you know about it, I assu-“

“Of course, but it’s your thoughts that matter for this”.

“Uh-huh. Well, it’s old. It’s an old Old City Stadium. It’s 150 years of matches, of rivalry, of making legends out of Sporting and United. So many moments, whole lifetimes of them. The United of the 40’s, the Sporting of the 50’s – that’s the one I grew up watching –, they were packed with stars: Petter Bielsen, Larissa Souza, Torsten Wolff, Aleksandr Kulikov, Zuriko Eliz, Norman Carter, Pristina Shine, Will Fich, Artur Rochemback, Mikel Aluztiza, Matty Paige. I’d see them on TV and it was glitz and glamour to me, it was the top of the line. They were out winning international tournaments, they could hold their own against any team in the world. So yeah, when I go out, week after week, and play in the same place they did, that matters to me.”

Down at Sajnur’s goal, a shot from Duarte had been blocked by a defender’s slide, and the rebound shot over the crossbar by Sorrosua to a deep “ooh” from the crowd. The goal kick that followed was high and long, just past the jumping head of Indartsu Lekea and into the path of Sajnur’s Andre Naulo, who had better judged its flight and feinted Lekea into jumping while he slipped behind. Now he ran at goal, Basuli Maktar beside him.

“You mentioned a lot of people, but not Zernin Aira. What do you think of that comparison?”

Zernin Aira was a legend of Astograthian goalkeeping. Olibondeka’s first long-term keeper and still one of their most-capped ever, he had been with the team through World Cup 55 qualifying to World Cup 59, and been decisive in the winning of Cup of Harmony 50. He’d also spent most of his career in goal for Sporting Iturributa. It was an incredible testament to his quality, consistency and longevity that, even having switched loyalties to play for the Iturributan national team after its independence, this was rarely held against him. Anzizar had, over the last few years, been increasingly compared to Aira.

“I hate it,” he’d told Lazaga.

As Narke directed Doyenard to close down Naulo, he passed the ball to Maktar, who shifted momentum to go left while Narke went right, and was left behind. They were nearly at the edge of the box, and Anzizar tensed himself.

“I don’t get it, I’m nothing like Aira and it does a disservice to both of us. Our footwork’s different, the way we work with our defence is different. I’m not Iturributan. He did a lot more than me and it’s too late for me to match that – and that’s OK. The only similarity is we wear ponytails sometimes, we play for Sporting and we play for the national team”.

It was uncertain until the last second whether Maktar would shoot or send a pass across the box for Naulo, but Anzizar had to position himself for either possibility. The defence had done a good job forcing him into a sharp angle, at least. When Maktar finally shot, Anzizar was like a coiled spring unleashed, jumping high and getting a good enough grip on the ball to catch it. He fell down to earth and lay with the ball between the ground and his chest for a few seconds that felt much longer.

“My name’s Anzizar, not Aira, and the press would do well to figure that out”.

[Alba and Cymru]

The Orthochronica
Chapter 5, "Ye Ford Gron" (The Roundtable)

In this chapter given to the Oracle Áed during his time in Tara (c. 933), several stories of earlier Oracles are mentioned, including Oracle Lancelot and the Knights of the Round Table (Verses 106-120), where the chapter derives its name. Proper etiquette and hygiene are discussed, as well as lawful times to work, eat, and travel. Some covenants by the Dagda are made in this chapter concerning the future of the believers and the nation of Creideamh.

The Word of the Dagda, as it concerns the Heavens and the Earth:

1 This is My word. O noble ones, be steadfast in your workings. From righteousness comes good, and from malice comes evil.
2 Be prepared for that day when the rivers will become dry and when the mountains will give reverence to My name. For many will dread that day, but for the noble ones this will be the final victory.
3 Hasten your work, for the day comes soon. Many before you have spoken of its coming. The sons of Abraham¹ spoke of a day of reckoning against evil, and the sons of Magog² spoke of a coming rebirth.
4 And the Oracles from before spoke of this day.
5 Many on that day will be in shock of the times, saying, "We denied this day would come, for it was never in our records."
6 But the prophecies had been revealed to them time and time again, yet they persisted in disbelief.
7 Therefore wait and be patient, for the hour of My reckoning is swift. It will surprise [many].
8 Remember this day, for those who believe in Fate will be cut off from the disbelievers. And the disbelievers will long to rejoin the believers, but the believers will be merry in Eternity.

9 And keep My covenants and the law, which has been bestowed unto you by the Oracles.
10 From the Oracle Cathbad, the Dagda gave you the law of the feasts, in which the Dagda forbade His people to sup during the midnight hours, and he forbade gluttony. He allowed you to consume [full] meals in the daylights hours. Except the winter, [in which] he allows those in their homes to eat [full meals] during the evening hours³. It would be unwise to break this commandment, for the old king had supped during the [entire] day and [entire] night, and he was unable to continue his reign⁴.
11 From the Oracle Lancelot, the Dagda gave you the laws of combat, in which the Dagda forbade His people from killing or harming the unarmed, and he forbade retaliation [for murder]⁵. He advised you [noble ones] to hold your loyalties, and to fulfill your oaths to your fellowmen as the Dagda has fulfilled his covenants with the world. He instructed you to defend the defenseless, and to destroy all invaders.
12 And to the Oracle Merlin, Lugh gave you the laws of labor, in which Lugh pemitted you to work during the daylight hours, and to defend during the day and the night. He allowed the men of knowledgeable age⁶ to till the ground and to look after the harvest. He allowed the adult men to tend the animals with accordance to the laws of husbandry.
13 He allowed the adult men to conduct sacrifices in the name of the Dagda. He perfected the ritual and set about the time of year to perform sacrifices.
14 From the Oracle Íosa⁷, the Dagda gave you the laws of forgiveness.
15 He stated, "Those of you [noble ones] who forgive those who have transgressed against you will be forgiven also by the Dagda.
16 And those of you who are humble and do good to others will be blessed. Those of you who make peace with others will be considered the children of the Dagda. The word has been given to you before, and I have come to fulfill what has been spoken."

17 O noble ones, keep the laws which have been given unto you, for you are promised generosity from Fate if you keep them. This has been made clear to you from the past, as those who did not keep the commandments of the Dagda and the Tuath Dé were separated from the believers [in death], and now they dwell in the cursed Elysium.
18 And do not think that any of you [noble ones] are spared from this Fate. No! Those who call themselves noble ones yet disobey my commandments and perform [their deeds] maliciously will be considered lower than the people of Elysium. They will have their place in oblivion.
19 For it angers the hearts of Fate when they are called upon in malice. Displeasure fills the hearts of the Tuath Dé when one of you performs with such unworthiness.
20 For over many generations of Oracles, the Dagda has supplemented the law. With the law and prophecies spoken by Tiarnán, and Bran, and Diarmuid, and Niall, and Áed⁸, the Dagda has completed the word [which is spoken].
21 It has been spoken before you by the Oracles to keep the feasts sacred.
22 So hold fast to the feast of Imbolg during [the rising of] each year.
23 And forget not the feast Beltaine, nor Samhain [in the closing of] each year.
24 For this is the time to perform your Earthly duties, and to provide for your generation for the next year. Those who do not observe these times are doomed to meet Fate.
25 And at these times is is not permissible to travel [long] distances.
26 But it is permissible to travel at any other time.

27 And hold fast to what the Oracle Fionn revealed at Tara. The Dagda revealed to him about cleanliness.
28 He commanded you to wash your hands and your face before eating and after working. Do not perform these duties, nor go to prayer, without considering this commandment.
29 For it is to your demise that you avoid this practice. And those who do not will be hastened to Fate.

30 Do you recall the story of Fionn, from whence he became an Oracle of the Dagda?
31 The Dagda said to him, "Fionn, son of Cumhaill, I command you to catch the salmon in the lake of Féic and to eat of it, but keep my commandment to clean your hands.
32 But Fionn replied, "There is no one who can catch the salmon, not even the druid whom I serve, Finn Eces. How must I eat it if I cannot catch it?"
33 The Dagda said, "I have bestowed upon you the power to do so, and do not deny that I have all power."
34 Fionn replied, "You are certainly all-powerful, and I believe in Fate. If it is destined that I must do this thing you ask me, I will do it."
35 And Fionn went on that day into the lake of Féic, and he immediately caught the salmon of knowledge while his master was watching.
36 So Finn Eces commanded him, "You must cook the fish for me, for it was told that I would be the one who consumes it."
37 But Fionn replied, "The Dagda has commanded me to wash myself [first]. I must do this before I can do anything else. It would be unwise to do otherwise."
38 Finn Eces said, "Very well, I will cook the fish myself."
39 And while Fionn washed himself after his work as commanded by the Dagda, Finn Eces disobeyed and cooked the fish in an impure state.
40 And Finn Eces was destined to burn his finger, which he put in his mouth while cursing Fate.
41 Then the Dagda spoke to Finn Eces saying, "You have disobeyed Me, druid. I have given you clear commandments from My Oracle concerning your purity, but you have rejected them for [the sake of] greed."
42 But Finn Eces said, "But there is no Oracle alive. There is no such commandment."
43 To which the Dagda replied, "I have chosen Fionn as My Oracle. To him I have given the commandments, and to you he has given My commandment. To you he has given the fish I have promised him. Its knowledge and wisdom I have also promised him, and so I forbid you from taking it."
44 And after this Finn Eces became gravely ill, and he repented from his old ways of impurity.
45 After this he said to Fionn, "To you the fish is promised and all of its knowledge and wisdom. You are the Oracle of the Dagda, and so I shall serve you now as you have served me. For on this day the Dagda has made you higher than all people."
46 So Fionn, keeping the Dagda's commandments, consumed the salmon of wisdom. And after that he had all knowledge of the world, and the Dagda made Fionn His Oracle.

47 Those who follow what is given in the Orthochronica are followers of righteous guidance. And those who abstain from this are doomed to Elysium.
48 And those who cannot keep purity as commanded by the Dagda will fall ill to the whims of Fate.

49 Do you recall how Merlin of Cambria⁹ rose and traveled to Alba to be a lumberman?
50 He travelled during the day from sunrise to sunset, and he rested in the evening and morning hours¹⁰.
51 And he worked the forests in accordance to the will of the Dagda¹¹.
52 There was not one tree that was abandoned, nor was there one tree forsaken.
53 Yet a man by the name of Dehewaint came into Alba from the land of Denmark, and he never knew of Fate nor the Dagda, and his treatment of the Caledons was a grievous sight in the eyes of the Dagda.
54 Dehewaint strained the forests, claiming three trees in the morning, and seven in the afternoon. He rested during the twilight hours, and he took trees during the night.
55 He slaughtered many animals of the forests, including those which were forbidden by the Dagda,
56 Including the wild fowl, and the lizards, and the lions.
57 He said to himself, "I have claimed this forest as my own, and no warrior shall cut me down. For I have come here from Denmark, and Alba is surely lesser [than Denmark]."
58 But Merlin knew of the presence of this challenger, and he went into the Caledons to seek Dehewaint, the unbeliever.
59 And Merlin found the faces of the mountains bare, for they had seen the wrath of Dehewaint.
60 He said, "Great Dagda, how could one bear such evils against a sacred place?"
61 The Dagda answered, "It is one who does not fear me nor Fate. I beseech you, Oracle, to confront this man at once. For his evils must not persist in the Caledons for any longer."
62 And so Merlin confronted Dehewaint the unbeliever, and said, "Dehewaint, the Dagda has sent me here to correct your actions, for your sin is causing strife in the land of Alba."
63 But Dehewaint replied, "I am a mighty man among your people.
64 And the forests of Caledon bow in reverance to me. I have summoned the forests of many mountains, and they provide me with its riches."
65 Merlin said, "You are a stranger in these lands, and you are an ant in the sight of the Dagda. I plead with you, turn to His ways for your own mercy."
66 Dehewaint was wroth with Merlin. And he replied, "Do not speak to me with such nonsense. I have my own way, and you have yours. Do not interfere with my ways, and forbid that I shall encroach upon yours."
67 So Merlin left the presence of Dehewaint with a heavy heart, having given the word of the Dagda, but the heart of Dehewaint was still wroth.
68 On that night as the moon was with the sun¹², Dehewaint persisted in his disbelief and sought to hew down three trees.
69 And a great fog covered the land of Alba, leaving all therein without sight of the night.
70 Yet Dehewaint continued his works, ignoring the commandments of the Dagda.
71 And on that night, the first tree that was downed by Dehewaint was lost from his sight, and the tree fell upon his leg.
72 And Dehewaint cried out for help, but none had come. The tree was mightier than even Dehewaint, and he could not move it.
73 Then Dehewaint's heart was softened. He plead to the Dagda praying, "Dagda, send one of your people to help me. I have disobeyed you, and Fate has taken its vengeance upon me."
74 Then the Dagda appeared to Merlin in a dream saying, "Rise up at the break of the sun, and return to Dehewaint the believer. For he has seen my ways."
75 Merlin rose up immediately at the break of dawn to seek Dehewaint, who had been crippled by his own works.
76 And Dehewaint, knowing of Merlin's presence, said, "O Oracle! I have disbelieved you and the Dagda, and I have challenged Fate. Now I am a crippled man and unable to move. I beseech you to help me."
77 Merlin was angered at the words of Dehewaint, and he said, "Do I hear you correctly, o disbeliever? You are a sore upon the face of the Caledons, and you are wretched in the sight of the Dagda. Fate has claimed you as a slave, and you are promised to dwell in the Plains of Elysium."
78 And Merlin left the sight of Dehewaint, who was on the verge of passing.
79 But Dagda appeared to Merlin straight away commanding, "Return to Dehewaint the believer, My Oracle. I have seen the contents of his soul, and now they are purer than honey."
80 Merlin fell to his knees and worshiped the Dagda saying, "How I have wronged you, O Dagda. I have not forgiven Dehewaint as you have forgiven him, and I have made him suffer¹³."
81 And Merlin rose up and returned to Dehewaint, who was slumbering in his pain.
82 Merlin, with the might of the Dagda, took up the tree with his hands and cast it to the side,
83 And aided Dehewaint to health. And from thereon Dehewaint swore an oath to the Dagda to never take arms against the forests of Alba.
84 Dehewaint kept the commandments of the Dagda, and he replentished his bounty threefold.
85 Then Dehewaint became a mighty warrior in the sight of the Dagda, and he fought in the ways of his Lord against the Saxons.

86 O noble ones, keep the commandments and believe in Fate. Adhere to the prophecies which have been presented before [your time].
87 The Dagda has promised a great nation out of Éire,
88 And it shall be known throughout the world. It shall be spoken of by all peoples.
89 Many will raise their arms against you, but Fate will fall on your behalf.
90 And Fate will cut them short of glory, and they will spend eternity in the Plains.
91 The Dagda has promised peace for your nations, but those who do not adhere to His word are subject to great chaos,
92 And wars, and pestilences, and famines.
93 For they follow unrighteousness, while those who follow the Orthochronica have no better book [for guidance].

94 What will cause the world to know what Fate is?
95 Fate is the ultimate decider of who will cross the River. Those who obey the Dagda and adhere to His ways are destined to cross into His Palace, where pure gold lines the floors and halls, and where rivers of wine flow.
96 Fate is like the serpent, who is slow and mystic in its ways, and who strikes quickly and painfully.
97 So shall it be when Fate calls upon the wicked, and so shall it be when Fate strikes you in battle.
98 But never fear Fate, for it is a timely passage. It is always certain in its ways.

99 Hold fast to these truths, and consider the [present] day, for there is none like it¹⁴.
100 Know that each man must have his etiquette in line with what is taught by the Oracles.
101 And know that it is impermissible to speak harshly to your guests, nor is it permissible to act recklessly in the presence of your host.
102 And know that it is unwise to call out to people inside their homes, for this is disturbing [to many].
103 And know that in the presence of a woman, it is unwise to look upon her with lust, unless she is your wife. This is most displeasing if she is married or a relative.
104 And know that it is unwise to slaughter your animals inside of your homes, for this is grievous to your guests.
105 But walk only in the ways of the Dagda, for he is all goodness. In his ways there is peace.

106 Do you recall the day when Lancelot prepared an army against the deceiver¹⁵,
107 Whom Lancelot was akin?
108 And do you remember what was said at the Round Table by the Oracle's knights? It was of utmost spiritual guidance.
109 The knights of the round table asked, "O Lancelot, son of Ban, how is one to achieve Heaven? What will Heaven have in store for those who receive it?"
110 Lancelot answered, "My brethren, Heaven cannot be achieved by the works of man. It is faith in what is good, in Fate, and in the Dagda which permits one into His Palace. And the Dagda smiles upon those who do good.
111 And His Palace is glorious in all of its splendor. It is where rivers of wine flow, and where the gardens bear fruits of gold, and where the strong and the crippled stand greater and equal in might."
112 Do you recall when the knights of the Round Table asked, "O Lancelot, son of Ban, is Dagda willing to provide us a heavenly feast?" Lancelot answered, "So you say. So fear Dagda if you believe in fate."
113 The knights of the Round Table answered, "Yes, we believe in fate. We fear the Dagda, and we know that you are His Oracle."
114 Then Lancelot answered, "So you say. Fate will smile upon you, my brethren, when the day comes when the Dagda expects your presence. You may be cut from this world, but even so, you will enter the glory of His Palace, which is larger than the whole land of Cambria. On that day, all of Heaven will smile upon you, for you have done good.
115 Your faith in the Dagda and in His commandments are worth far more than the splendor of the Earth. For no king on Earth could avast the riches of Heaven nor the kings who sit therein.
116 So keep the laws that were presented before you by previous Oracles.
117 Do not steal, nor lie, nor challenge Fate. Do not witness falsely to the law nor your [related and religious] brethren. Do not perform what is displeasing in the eyes of the Dagda. Do not injure nor kill the innocent nor unarmed.
118 Always be fair with your women. Never be too mild nor too harsh with any [others], and be kind with those who are of little age, and revere those who are of great age.
119 These and others are commandments of the Dagda and the Tuath Dé as presented to mankind by the former Oracles. If you keep these commandments, you are on the path of righteous guidance. If you keep the faith in Fate and in the Dagda, you will surely be promised paradise with Him."
120 Consider this, and know that the Dagda is all-knowing. He has a record-keeper for each of your deeds¹⁶. And those books which are filled with heresies, He will cast into the Plains [of Elysium]. As for those which are filled with good deeds and faith, they shall see His Palace. This is My word.

---

1 - The Jews, Christians, and Muslims
2 - The Mongolic and Turkic Shamans. Some scholars believe this includes Native Americans, but this remains disputed.
3 - The "evening" here pertains to the immediate hours after sundown.
4 - Conchobar Abradruad was a High King during the time of Cathbad. He is said to have eaten all day and night, which awarded him extreme obesity. His weight was too much for him to handle, and he was unable to continue his royal duties, which prompted the next king, Crimthann, to take the throne.
5 - Vengeance and honor-killings are pheaca, or sinful. It is best to leave these actions with the hands of the law and the druids.
6 - Knowledgeable age means the age which one can do simple work, such as tilling the ground. Scholars have debated what age is considered "knowledgeable", with some arguing as low as 7, while some as high as 16. Most consider the age of 10 as the permissible age to perform simple farm work.
7 - Jesus was an Oracle who was sent by the Dagda to the sons of Isaac, and his followers after him were sent out to the world to preach his message. Many Uaislean suffered extreme persecution from the Catholic Pope during the days of Áed for even mentioning the name of Jesus. Today Jesus is spoken of by all the tongues of the world by Christians, Muslims, and Uaislean.
8 - These are the five Fàidhean, to whom the Orthochronica was given by the Dagda and several Tuath Dé. They are known as the final Oracles.
9 - Merlin of Cambria was the Oracle of Britain before Lancelot. He is said to be a humble man who traveled around the British Isles and later to France to preach the word of the Dagda. Geoffrey of Monmouth appropriated the story of Merlin to his tale of King Arthur, in which he is portrayed as a wizard. This is historically incorrect.
10 - The "evening" and "morning" pertain to the hours when the sun is not in the sky (i.e. the entire night).
11 - In Creideamh, only one tree can be timbered by one man per day. And each tree must be replaced by another.
12 - Another translation is, "On that moonless night...."
13 - This passage illustrates the humanness of the Oracles. All of the Oracles are merely humans with a divine message and power, not divine humans. The Oracles have all had shortcomings, including the five Fàidhean. This passage also shows that the Dagda is not the source of all of the shortcomings of humanity, and that many hardships experienced in this life are the works of our own hands.
14 - Déjà vu was considered by many to be the result of witchcraft. However, this verse reveals that each and every day is unique and that there are no repeated days or events.
15 - Medraut was the evil nephew of King Arthur who secretly worked for the Saxons. He conspired with several of Lancelot's companions, including Maleagant and Morgan, to lie to King Arthur about an affair between Lancelot and Queen Guinevere - which could never have happened since Lancelot is an Oracle.
16 - Lugh is the record-keeper of the Dagda. Each life has an account written by Lugh, and every life will be judged according to what is written by him.

OOC: I apologize if this comes off as blasphemous or anything of the sort. I don't mean to cause offense. Keep in mind that the "Orthochronica" and "Creideamh" are purely fictional and based off of Gaelic Mythology with Christian influence. No, I do not believe in Creideamh, and neither should you. Also, this was a pretty long chapter, and the future ones should be quite shorter than this.

[Zwangzug]

Quincy staggered out of the visitors' clubhouse, wearing sunglasses that made him look much cooler than a reserve on the second-to-last team in the league. He made his way over to the Peak'n'Break stand that had been commandeered as the main meal area. He was not about to say he was getting tired of breakfast food. He would say, however, that the fact it kept well made it more of a necessity than a luxury, by that point.

"You okay?" Tessie asked.

Quincy gave the inquiry serious consideration. "Have you ever felt like you're two different people?"

"That sounds serious," said Tessie. "Have you asked the others if that's a symptom?"

"It's not," said Quincy. "It was just--when I woke up this morning I felt terrible, looking at light hurt. Even the lights in the showers or the tunnels were painful. So I went over with the others, but of course they don't have that problem, like, they can see just fine. Wound up resting in the referees' room. And it was like--I couldn't imagine ever feeling healthy again. Like it was rash to jump to conclusions, to assume anything without proof, and the idea that this was just an aberration and it would go away was foolishly naive. And then, it went away. And so--how can these both be me? How do I remember so strongly feeling hopeless, when I feel just fine now and have no reason for it to come back?"

Tessie gave this some thought. "People who don't like football," she said, "say that it's boring. That nothing happens. That one team can outplay the other in terms of possession, shots on goal, passes completed, and it doesn't really matter because it'll be a scoreless tie anyway. Now, people like us, who know the game, understand that something is always happening. The ball moves. Players move. The interactions between opponents create moving shapes, moving patterns on the field. That never stops."

"Sure," said Quincy.

"Continuous movement. And eventually, it leads to a discrete goal. Sometimes it's not really earned, sometimes it's against the run of play. But it happens, often enough that not every game is a tie, that there are meaningful competitions and comparisons between teams."

"Unfortunately for us."

"Small changes, invisible to most people, that add up to incremental results. Your body was healing even when you couldn't see it. And, we hope not, but you might get sick again someday, and if so, it might feel sudden but there was probably a gradual onset underneath. Does that help?" she asked brightly.

"Not really," Quincy admitted, "but I guess I'll just be grateful for this moment. As long as it lasts."

"Have a muffin?"

"I'm healthy enough to eat real food, let's see what section 8 has grillable."

"Muffins are real," Tessie protested. "Either that or there are a lot of virtual avatars wandering around the stadium."

"Might be safer," said Quincy. But he took off his glasses and bore the might of the sunset, slowly pacing towards section 8.

[Twicetagram and JYPe]

Life in Twicetagria

We edited our logo to make it look fancier

---

Twicetagria 1-2 Baker Park: No-nicknamers almost win against giants
By John Suh

It's been 8 match days, and we're beginning to see how the group is shaping out. Baker Park is on an unbeaten and winning streak, with 33 goals to their name. Zwangzug comes behind with 18 points, which puts 6 between them and Baker Park. The Macabees, whom we faced on the opening match, is third with 15 points. Then we have Darkmania bagging 12 points from 7 games. In 5th place we have Twicetagria, whose presence so high up is quite unexpected.

A narrow loss against Baker Park slides us down to 5th place. Baker Park first took the lead in the 62nd minute after a boring first half. Han was at a loss for words as the knuckleball confused him. Baker Park did well to extend the lead 7 minutes later by a nice header.
Thankfully, Hirai equalized in the 81st minute with a half volley from a corner. Unfortunately, we couldn't tie the score line.
Next up, we're against Sharktail, who's return to football hasn't been going so well. We should expect at least a draw, although a win is also highly possible.

[New Lusitania and the Algarves]

STL|Serviços de Transmissão Lusitana
Sport | Football|
World Cup 85

A WHITE SCOREBOARD
New Lusitania 0-0 Villablanca
@ AlgarveArena, Algarves (Att: 36 702)

Back from a good win over in N-City the team returned to the warm temperatures of the Algarves' winter for what was expected to be a good game for the Lusitanian side. Two changes as Vinagrete returned with Azinheira also coming back. As the red dust settled in, the whistle blew for this first encounter between the two nations. The first half was quite a boring meeting with not much to report on. The away side managed a good shot which saw Patríce stretch as Gama found his footing despite hitting the bar in an unlucky outcome for the Sevilha midfielder and captain. The second half brought on a new striker as Ivo Cavalariça would get his first chance in about half a cycle with the exit of Paciente. Admittedly, the OF Académica man played well during his half with the number of shots rising due to a familiarity with the system being played according to the striker later in an interview. The moment of truth was certainly Veiga's goal which was sent in with a Fernando assist and great precision. However, the referee blew the whistle almost immediately after the flag went up on the sideline to the dismay of the home crowd. Villablanca after a certain while had understood they could actually get something on the day and played largely on the counter-attack playing for the one point in the closing moments of the game. Despite this, one opportunity presented itself as one of the midfielders hit the post despite a clear gap that would've made it easier to score. For the Selecção, the result would thankfully at least stay on a draw in what was one of the team's more lacklustre performances so far. FULL TIME: 0-0


Around the Grounds
Despite the slip-up, New Lusitania remained fifth for the time being as Necosia managed their second point with a goalless draw against the Natanians and Nosts. Elsewhere, Jeckland almost prevented Turori from winning but a minor slip-up saw the table leaders go seven from seven with a 1-0 win. Audioslavia's victory to the EOT by 3-0 meant they climbed back up to second as Sajnur drew Astograth in the other goalless draw of the group. Meanwhile, Porticalia saw their first win in a while with a 2-1 triumph over Muradil away. TJUN-ia, who will host New Lusitania next, meaning that they'll have a good edge with some relaxation being done in their squad which will probably want revenge for the Independents Cup earlier this cycle, meaning it has everything to be an entertainer.



THE HUB
Goals: Jota (5), Silveira (2), Gama (2), Paciente (2), Veiga (2), Fernando (2),
Assists: Fernando (3), Mário (2), Gama (2), Horta (2), Azinheira (1), Jota (1), Paciente (1), Silveira [1], Veiga (1), Nevais (1).
Bookings: Cancela (2Y)
Injuries: Silveira (expected Return MD12)
Next Match: TJUN-ia X New Lusitania
@ Beregozera Stadium, Szensky


MMXX STL

[Kita-Hinode]

Hey, kids. So, you know that the World Cup qualifiers are happening right now, yes? I think you could tell from the smell of burnt rubber chickens. Anyhow, what if I told you that there's more to football than just featuring the greats? Well, there is now: the Imperial Hinodejin Football Association, aware of the current state of affairs wants to bring people together to laugh at some crap footy.

With that in mind, the Imperial Hinodejin Football Association, the associated companies of the Big Bang Konzern group and the Foundation to Show More Content would like to introduce to you the Big Bang Amateur Football International Tournament for the World! Unlike pretty much every single tournament in the history of NSS, we'll be actually running the tournament in screenings (not unlike the ones made for The Idiot Project not too long ago), via Sensible World of Soccer.

So, how do you participate? Well, here's the deal. Gather sixteen amateur players: they can be contest winners, some friends that got really lucky... just a group of lads that want to play football and maybe get a professional contract to play at the Hinodejin Empire's illustrious (citation needed) KiHi-League. Just make sure to point out which ones will be the two goalies of your team. You should be getting something like this.

Now, we only have twenty-three slots. We do hope to add teams of users willing to watch the games, to make it more fun. As to when the screenings will happen, expect the news to show up on the NS Sports' Discord server first but I'll make sure to notify anyone that signs up. To sign-up, send me a list of sixteen players, indicating your goalies, any physical features that might be important to take under consideration and what their (very basic) kits will look like... oh, and good luck, of course.

[Valladares]

A new day seemed to start as usual at the former Valladar capital, Columbus. As the sun started to deliver its first rays over the city's historical buildings, statues and monuments such as the gigantic one dedicated to King Alexander I at the place where the Aguablanca river delivers its waters into the bigger Danubio, over a million inhabitants were getting ready to start with their habitual work or study tasks, along with another couple of thousands commuting from nearby Maldonado, across the Danubio.

This new day, however, was not going to be like any other...and especially not in a city with such a delicate demographic balance like the colonial capital. The first news of the day had thousands of citizens gathering on the big screens placed in the largest squares of Columbus, for a couple of important events that took place in the recent days. The first one was the confirmation of the successful Mega Bomba test in the faraway lands of Terra Henrius, a news received with awe by the general populace not just in Columbus, but also in the entire nation. The other one was the enactment of the Law of Secession of the Mountbatten State, which entered in force having been passed by the Royal Parliament and signed by Kings Marcus and Cyrus the prior day.

While the Law of Secession was, for the most part, well-received and welcomed by the Hispanophone population of Columbus, who supported a separation from the Mountbatten state and headed to the city's main square to celebrate, it was heavily opposed by the Anglophone half of the city and the main Liberal and Labour politicians, who organized a public demonstration to protest the new law, which was joined by thousands of citizens as it headed from western Columbus to the Palacio Quemado, the former centre of power in colonial and pre-modern Valladares and current headquarters of the Mayoralty of Columbus, across the city's Main Square where the Hispanic concentration was gathering. Tension was slowly being built up as the massive march into downtown Columbus crossed the Aguablanca river, throwing harangues for the unity of Mountbatten that had just been broken by law and against the Law itself, the Hispanic Party of Mountbatten, their leader Álvaro Montillo, Speaker of the Royal Parliament Stéphane Bertrand, and incredibly enough, the Kings Marcus and Cyrus for having sanctioned it.

Already aware of the growing wave of anger that was flowing through the streets of Columbus and heading for an unavoidable clash against their Hispanic opponents, the Royal Police cordoned off both the Palacio Quemado and Main Square, and tried to convince the Hispanic concentration to leave the place and continue with their celebrations elsewhere. But they refused. Like if they actually wanted to prove they deserved their own statehood on the battlefield. Like if they really wished to settle this matter once and for all. What mattered in the end was that Columbus had now turned into a bomb that was about to explode.

And so, the Anglophone demonstration arrived at the already crowded place around 10 o'clock in the morning. For some minutes, the situation was tense but seemingly under control by the Royal Police, who had managed to keep both sides separated from each other by a buffer zone in the middle of the square. At the same time, the Mayor, Councilors and the employees of both the city's Mayoralty and Council were being evacuated from the Palacio Quemado to a safe haven. However, things quickly escalated out of control when the Anglophone masses stopped hurling insults at their Hispanic counterparts and exchanged them for stones, with their rivals now forced into replying accordingly to the aggression. The long-feared clash between the city's communities had already started.

The Royal Police tried to disperse protesters with tear gas, which had little effect, and instead prompted both sides to spread the fighting to other areas of the city. Rioters started committing damage and arson on property such as vehicles and businesses owned by people from the other faction. Schools and universities suspended classes for the day and started sending their students home, some of whom joined the riots according to the group they belonged to. Employees were also released from their jobs for the day, while the delegation of professional football club Étoile Verte, who were in the city to play a Liga-2 match against their FC Columbus counterparts later that day, made a request to the Liga Federal de Valladares for the match to be cancelled, while watching in horror the rioting from their hotel in downtown.

Police units in the city were quickly overwhelmed, despite the deployment of tanks and even patrol boats on the Danubio and Aguablanca rivers, and made a desperate call for reinforcements to neighboring towns, most of which were unable to collaborate as they were having trouble containing their own riots. In fact, nearly every municipality of eastern Mountbatten was having demonstrations or minor disturbances, although the ones in Greater Metropolis or closer to the federal capital were able to keep things under control but not really able to send reinforcements on time to help quell the riots in Columbus.

"To all units in the municipalities surrounding the city of Columbus! This is Lieutenant Colonel Sarmiento, from Columbus! Riots between Hispanics and Anglophones in the city going out of control! We need your assistance with some units, urgently!"

"This is Major Rojas, from Montebello. I'm sorry, Lieutenant Colonel Sarmiento. We can't send any units to the city, Montebello and surrounding areas are also having riots of their own. We're trying to restore control, once we do we might send some units but not at the moment."

"Major Cross from Allenby reporting! We're unable to contribute with additional units. Riots underway in the town, we're trying to get the situation under control!"

Meanwhile, the bridge and cableway linking Columbus with its sister city Maldonado were quickly flooded with people from both cities who wanted to return home, before both were closed off by the Maldonado branch of the Royal Police some minutes after noon. The Maldonado Police answered the calls for help from its neighbour and sent units to help control the situation in Columbus, with prior permission from autorities in the Chiquito state. At the same time, the Royal Government in Metropolis granted permission to the SDF to intervene in the city, with Prime Minister Jefferson Pratt issuing a decree for the militarization of the city until further notice.

With the reinforcements from Maldonado, as well as soldiers from the II Division of the Valladar Army, the Columbus Police was able to regain control of the city by the end of the afternoon, pushing the Anglophone rioters west of the Aguablanca river and closing all the bridges linking western Columbus to the rest of the city, effectively dividing it by half. At the end of the day, 4 people were killed in the riots, and other 158 people were injured. Eastern Columbus, including the city's downtown, was now officially under Army control, with the Police holding control of the western zone, Mayor of Columbus Jorge Gallardón decreed a curfew for all areas in the city starting from sunset and ending at dawn the following day, the FCC-Étoile Verte match was pushed back to the following day but the Bezierien side still refused to play as they deemed the city unsafe and arranged for their return home via Maldonado, the traditional celebrations of Bonfire Day scheduled for June 7 were cancelled, and Prime Minister Jefferson Pratt announced a visit to Columbus the next day in the hopes to calm tempers among both clashing factions. Or will his attempts end up backfiring and stirring more anger instead?

[Huayramarca]

ÑÑ Part 1.

Ñucanchi Ñan - Part 2

Hugo Mina was now trying to do some movements in order to deploy his plan, the Coastal was aware that his chance was today, he had to attack so he could perform well, but something that might be noted is that Serranos aren’t a easy nut to crack, he knew that there were some odd signals in the Sierra with some peasants, despite knowing it, Mina couldn’t care less, he always thought that the Coastal economic power may reign over the Serrano’s nicely prepared communal organizations and syndicates. The frogs were the right excuse behind everything, González was supporting him keenly in order to do what was needed to do and take this regional war into something safe for him.

Mina contacted the police department regency into the Huayramarcan Metropolitan District in order to coordinate his next move, cracking down the Sierra. Mina took his phone and was responded “Good morning Mr. Pres…” “Please, let’s get rid of the scum as soon as possible, I need you to increase surveillance at the D.M. pronto.” Said Mina “Why?” was asked by the regent of the police, Mina answered brutally and screamed “Just fucking do it!” then he slapped the phone back at the hotel in Sechura, he thought he did it secretly, but forgot to have some consideration for the neighboring rooms, specially the 113th room at the hotel, since he secretly recorded the conversations and screams made by Mina, a risk for his campaign was at the next door and also something that could spark the fire even more.

Huayramarcan Metropolitan District – 22/03/1980 – 10:04 A.M.

The police regent received the order from Mina, he had to proceed if he didn’t wanted his head to be full of lead by the end of the day, no alternative was given so he called the entire police to surveil the contours of the city and target “suspicious” activities such as the coca leaf consumption, Serranos selling artisanship crafts and other commercial activities being financed by them, this, based in two things: First one, that Serranos were trying to boycott sports by putting those frogs into the field and the Inti’s images, while the second was some dodgy report from the Dirección de Inteligencia Nacional (DIN – National Intelligence Directory) that stated that some dormant terrorist cells from the suburbs of the capital city were reactivating. This move would be risky, but it somewhat justified the move according to what the government tried to provide as excuse for the police agents on the field.

“Officers, we are facing an unknown threat, according to DIN, there are some dormant terrorist cells waking up, we need to crack them down with some control in their zones, we need to patrol El Alto, Sopocachi, La Vereda, Huasipungo and Copacabana in order to prevent Serrano communism to take control of our lives, we need to live freely!” Said the regent while the police officers had to nod “You must comply with this order, president Mina was explicit with this, we need to take them down before it may be too late.” The police was sent into their busses to the suburbs previously mentioned, those are places known for being home of poor people coming from other places of the highlands in order to make a living on tourism related issues, might be a second to last resort before going to the highest mountains of Huayramarca to get enrolled into illegal mineral exploitation that normally happens at the department of Antisuyo, known for its extremely high mountains and abundancy of mineral resources.

Police arrived to the suburbs, the people wasn’t surprised at all since this kind of acts were somewhat usual in the last months, Mina has tried to terrorize Serranos for the sake of being Serranos, his hate towards them was something that could be irrational at least, if not a mental issue derived from childhood traumas or something, it was unknown since Mina always wanted to preserve his strongman image among the media of Huayramarca and specially at the coast, trying to revive a sentiment that was almost buried down for years in them, he was struggling to do so, but was in the path of managing that.

Sopocachi, Huayramarcan Metropolitan District – 22/03/1980 – 11:55 A.M.

Recomended song while reading the RP, for some context.

Inhabitants of Sopocachi were the most well-organized ones, that neighborhood is known for having a strong organization between indigenous groups and nearby places, even to the point of forming self-defense groups. While police arrived, children playing on streets noticed them walking, a child tried to run and tell their parents about the situation, a police officer tried to stop the child, he ran and tackled him “Where are you going, mañudo?¹” said the police, while the child was sobbing already from that hit, a teenager managed to scape while another child threw a rock to the police officer. Things started to get a bit hot but the police knew that they just wanted to crack down activity, not causing a major issue in a neighborhood well-known for their dignity.

The people received quick warning from the random teenager that ran away from the scene, he basically smashed a bell that’s on the main plaza of said neighborhood, people knows that the bell is only used for unusual circumstances as this one, there were 400 police officers outside one of the entrances of Sopocachi, the guy said “There are police officers, lots of them and one kicked Juanito.” Juanito was the small child now sobbing, he’s well known in the neighborhood for having autism, of course, the officer didn’t know the fact but people did, and that fact turned the mass into an angry mob that would try to expel police officers from the zone. The mob ran behind the dude and found the scene of Juanito being once again kicked by the police officer, people gathered rocks and decided to attack police with them, another young boy took Juanito and the other children away from the scene, one officer saw that and shoot Juanito with a castable rubber dispensing gun, now he was bleeding all the way while the guy was carrying him to the local clinic.

His mother saw the scene, she had a semi-automatic rifle and decided to search it at home, she did it and took her AK-47, Marta, as she’s called, ran down the street and found the officer who cold-blooded shot Juanito, she posed at the front of the group, the people of Sopocachi tried to stop her since she was overreacting but it was too late, she triggered her AK and shot the vanguard of the police several times, killing them at the spot while the rest of the police corps were trying to seek refuge. People was now controlling the situation and decided to take advantage, they took the guns of the fallen police officers and stared to shoot the rest of officers, while others decided to beat them with rocks and sticks “Please, don’t kill us” were some cops begging while the mob was raging completely, reinforcements weren’t asked since all of this happened surprisingly, although, one police was struggling to keep himself alive, he grabbed a radio to communicate with the regency, he said “Please, help us, we’re being shot in Sopocachi.” “I repeat, we’re being shot and there’s at least 15 dead officers.” Back at the regency, the directorate received a hurried administrative police officer, he took the radio and informed them with what was happening, the regent skin was like a chicken, he was shocked at what he was listening, he knew that Sopocachi is a conflictive neighborhood with police, but didn’t imagined that the situation would escalate that quick.

The regent decided not to give an order, instead, tried to communicate with Hugo Mina to give information about what was happening, he called but it was too late, he knew it “I said crack them down, you should proceed to neutralize them and reestablish order at any cost.” The regent nodded and asked the officer to send reinforcements to Sopocachi.

People knew that Marta was furious and that’s why she reacted like that, they knew that reinforcements would come and Mina would be aware of the situation, people needed to defend themselves on what would come to them, although, there wasn’t enough reason for a violent reaction yet, hence, Sopocachi would react in defense of themselves against the tyranny ordered from the sun-drenched coast. Still, some people were somewhat angry of what was happening with the Sierra region, they were being marginalized, discriminated and taking away their resources, they were being robbed at daylight. Because that was happening and truth is something that shouldn’t be hidden out.

Marta took the role of leader at the moment, her son was at risk of death by running away from officers, brutality at its best was that, a mother when her daughters receive mistreat by someone is a completely different person, her maternal instinct was now on, she was decided to reveal her people in Sopocachi in order to stop abuse against Serranos, it was matter of time. She saw police coming with reinforcements, people were shooting while her took the AK, reloaded it and shoot to the air while screaming “¡Ñucanchi Ñan!² Our life, our path, our right to defend ourselves" while shooting. An authentic Leader of the Humble people of Huayramarca.

---

1. Used against criminals, dodgy persons. Means delinquent or thieve.
2. Literally, "Our Path" in Quechua.

[Eura]

A handy guide to Euran government acronyms for their internal communications:

OSI officials:

CHR-OSI = Chairman of the Office of State Intelligence (OSI)
DCHR-OSI = Deputy Chairman of the OSI
D-HI = Director of Home Intelligence, OSI official responsible for the agency’s role in domestic intelligence work and collaboration with a smaller domestic law enforcement focused sub-agency, the Federal Security Agency (FSA).
D-ESI = Director of External State Intelligence, OSI official responsible for the collection of information on foreign states and the nations they govern.
D-FAI = Director for Foreign Affairs Intelligence, OSI official responsible for collaboration and information sharing between Eura’s Foreign Office, Federal Diplomatic Service and the OSI.
D-SI = Director of Signals Intelligence, OSI official responsible for active and passive surveillance of foreign communications of all varieties (but particularly military and diplomatic traffic).
OPSRUS, OPSAO, OPSESP, OPSEND = Directors of Operations for Rushmore, Atlantian Oceania, Esportiva and Endemia.
D-CBRN – Director of Chemical, Biological, Radiological and Nuclear, OSI official responsible for response to issues concerning use of weapons of mass destruction.

Other government officials:

MOI-MONITOR = Joint user for three highest ranking civil servants in the Ministry of Intelligence to monitor conversations and receive updates, reporting to the Secretary of State for Intelligence – who is effectively responsible for the OSI, and the OSI Chairman’s boss.
MOD-MONITOR = Similar to above but for Ministry of Defence, and the Chief of Staff for each Euran military branch; the Army, Navy, Air Force, Marine Corps, Special Forces Executive and Nuclear Forces.
FO-MONITOR = Similar to the above but for the Foreign Office and Federal Diplomatic Service.
CENTRE-CSEC = The office of the Chief Secretary (CSEC) to the Cabinet (CENTRE), the most senior civil servant in the Euran state. The CSEC themselves do not usually see everything CENTRE-CSEC sees, but their staff are responsible for flagging issues if needed, and it is through them that the Prime Minister is kept informed of important developments.
CENTRE-EOT = The office of the Governor General of the Euran Oceania Territories.

Terminology and references:

OSIOP = OSI Operator, a highly secure networking tool used by upper echelons of the Euran intelligence services to communicate in a secure manner with other government officials and the armed forces without risk of interception.
GOV = Government/state (eg. NATION-GOV)
FOR = Armed forces (eg. NATION-FOR)
LEAD = Leader (eg. NATION-LEAD)
TERMS = Treaty or international agreement
ORG = Private organisation, such as a business or NGO
EUR = Eura (whereas GOV/FOR/LEAD type titles are split from other nations with a hypen, they are not split with Eura – so Euran Government would be EURGOV rather than EUR-GOV)
EOT = Euran Oceania Territories
ROYAL = Valladares
FRANC = Royal Kingdom of Quebec
TER-HEN = Terra Henrius
CYAN = Krytenia
SHOTPUT = Aircraft deployed nuclear bomb.
JAVELIN = Intercontinental ballistic missile (land launched).
BOOMER = Ballistic missile submarine armed with nuclear weapons.
WHALE = Nuclear aircraft carrier.
UNCONVENTIONAL = Specialist naval vessel, eg. Spy ship or research vessel.

Code: Select all

///LOGGED ON AS: CHR-OSI///
- MAKING CONNECTION
- AUTHORISATION: REQUESTED
- #P72I*****
- PROCESSING...

…

- AUTHORISATION: ACCEPTED
- CONNECTION MADE
- YOU ARE NOW ACCESSING THE OSIOP NETWORK. PLEASE ENSURE YOUR DEVICE IS APPROPRIATELY SECURE AS PER REGULATIONS 14.1 TO 16.1, ACT ON STATE INFORMATION SECURITY (SEE ANNEXES 1-3 FOR POLICY DETAILS)
/join ~DailyBrief
- CONNECTED TO THREAD ~DailyBrief
/runupdate

CLASSIFICATION – TOP SECRET
OFFICE OF STATE INTELLIGENCE

IF THIS COMMUNICATION IS RECEIVED ELECTRONICALLY, ENSURE DEVICE AND CONNECTION ARE FULLY SECURE. IF THIS COMMUNICATION IS RECEIVED ON PAPER, STORE IN ACCORDANCE WITH MOI PROCEDURES OR DESTROY AFTER READING.

FROM: CHR-OSI
COPY: DCHR-OSI, D-HI, D-ESI, D-FAI, D-SI, OPSRUS, OPSAO, OPSESP, OPSEND, D-CBRN
TO: CENTRE-CSEC, MOI-MONITOR, MOD-MONITOR, FO-MONITOR, CENTRE-EOT
SUBJECT – SCHEDULED DAILY BRIEF
TASKING – URGENT

MONITOR and CENTRE colleagues, this is an emergency brief on developments in the Atlantian Oceania region within the past 72 hours, as requested by the PRIME MOVER. MOD-MONITOR will already be aware of this information as CHR-OSI has cleared this brief with MOD in advance.

Approx. 57 hours ago, what is assumed to be a CBRN test (N variety) was carried out within the borders of the TER-HEN to the west of EOT. This is not the first time a CBRN test has been carried out in the territory, but this occasion was unprecedented for several reasons, which can be best summarised within the following three conclusions:
- The size of the test was extremely large, in the 40-50 MT range, and delivered by the SHOTPUT method.
- It was carried out completely unannounced and with no forewarning to CENTRE-EOT or EURFOR.
- The test was carried out not by FRANC-FOR but by ROYAL-FOR, with the consent and assistance of the host nation/force.

The evidence base for the first two conclusions is clear:
- Ground based monitoring equipment in EOT to monitor post-Corvidae scientific anomalies, EURFOR monitoring equipment set up in response to FRANC-FOR exercises and a variety of other data sources made us instantly aware of both the detonation and most of its characteristics, including a range for possible scale (40-50 MT is an estimate but one with a very high level of confidence behind it) and the delivery method (EUR-FOR leads, D-SI and D-CBRN are certain this was a SHOTPUT device based on ground tracking of the likely delivery vehicle from the western reaches of EOT and tracking from an EAF AWACs).
- The second conclusion is self-explanatory. No warning or even foreshadowing was received from ROYAL or FRANC GOV/FOR. This is highly unusual – from previous experience, FRANC-FOR tend to give us advanced notice of these things, to the point where they can’t help themselves.

For the third conclusion we are able to infer that this was a ROYAL-FOR test from several indicators:
- The lack of announcement is a break from FRANC-FOR practice, but consistent with how secretive ROYAL-FOR are by comparison (especially when testing a huge N device so close to EOT and EUR interests).
- The ground and AWACS tracking data of the suspected delivery vehicle does not match any known FRANC-FOR equipment signatures but does closely resemble ROYAL-FOR equipment of the variety required for SHOTPUT delivery.
- From EUR-FOR and MOD experience and knowledge (admittedly this may be erroneous), FRANC-FOR strategic forces are almost exclusively of the BOOMER and JAVELIN variety.
- An OSI asset in TER-HEN capital (GTH) reported not just the earthquake-like impact on the city that was easily observable from social media, but also sighting an inbound landing of a damaged aircraft. They took two photographs which were passed to MOD for analysis; they identified the aircraft as an as yet unknown modification to the ROYAL-FOR BJ-5 series. We are confident this was either the delivery vehicle, or some kind of observer plane.

There are some questions we have yet to firmly answer, although we can offer some advice:
- What weapons programme is involved? OSI and EUR-FOR intelligence generally speaking have a high level of penetration into ROYAL-FOR and ROYAL-GOV, but the characteristics of this test do not match any systems currently known to us. It is highly likely therefore that his was developed in utmost secrecy and was concealed from EUR-GOV in particular.
- Why now? EUR/ROYAL relations are at a relative high and have been for some time. D-ESI and D-FAI have picked up no pattern of increased hostility from ROYAL-GOV. If we are having to ask this question, then we are operating from a position of ignorance on a crucial point.
- Why TER-HEN? Aside from the more obvious practical benefits of using FRANC-GOV’s “testing ground”, it seems unthinkable that ROYAL-GOV will not have considered the implications of doing this on the doorstep of EOT and EUR interests/territory. It cannot have been chosen for covert purposes – there was nothing covert about this test, and CYAN-GOV is already going public with questions. Are we missing something?
- What next? We do not know what ROYAL-GOV and FRANC-GOV intend to do next – whether they intend to go public, and to what extent. We can only assume they do as there is no plausible scenario case in which this test could be kept secret.
- Are ROYAL-FOR intimidating us? It seems highly improbable they haven’t thought this through (proximity, scale of the test, secrecy, our well-publicised approach to reckless CBRN use following the surprise attack by SAM-FOR), which means malicious intent must be a strong possibility, but it is not impossible that they have simply miscalculated.

In terms of next actions, it seems obvious this is a decision for CENTRE and PRIME MOVER. I will forward on ASAP a detailed outline of potential actions the OSI can recommend for the Government to pursue. However, in brief, the most viable and immediately available diplomatic responses put in basic terms are:

- Do nothing. My understanding from interaction with Ministers offices is that this is not seen as a viable option.
- “Soft” response. Non-specific statement urging ROYAL and FRANC authorities to be more transparent and maintain observance of norms of weapons testing agreements.
- “Intermediate” response. Issue a more firm public statement demanding an explanation for the test, and summoning the relevant ambassadors.
- “Critical” response. Publicly condemn the test and publish detailed information on the test and our other evidence. Summon ambassadors for a dressing down. Raise EUR-FOR alert level and draft up potential sanctions for Parliamentary approval.
- “Hard” response. Carry out all measures within “Critical” response option with a full sanctions regime considered, and carry out some form of display of force to make our position unambiguous – for example a JAVELIN or BOOMER test launch, EUR-FOR exercises.
- Choose to interpret the test as a deliberate act of aggression and substantially raise EUR-FOR alert level, test strategic forces, carry out exercises and pursue irregular methods of retaliation against a hostile act (eg. Cyberattacks, activating assets, direct trade offensive).

I will leave it to PRIME MOVER and CENTRE to let myself and other members of the Intelligence and Security CENTRE Committee know if one of these options is to be adopted imminently, or if further advice is required. However, in my view, the CRITICAL and HARD responses would be the most proportionate and in line with the Government’s established precedents (“the Yarley doctrines” of non-tolerance of any and all possibly hostile activity).

As an early measure, regardless of which response option we pursue, we could spike any planned ROYAL/FRANC announcement or explanation of the test with a pre-emptive release of evidence that we can disclose and a statement from the FO. We could theoretically do it this second, and the less time we wait the better. But if PRIME MOVER and CENTRE do wish to pursue this option it may be worth waiting for MOD and EUR-FOR to obtain further confirmation of key details, and potentially satellite imagery. For all options, OSI will prioritise garnering more information on both ROYAL and FRANC activities. In fact resources are already being assigned to that end.

If Ministers wish to discuss specific points then please use the usual channels to put them directly in touch with me.

Yours,
CHR-OSI

[Farfadillis]

The FFFF would like to use this cut-off to announce they won't be banning Cocoa-bo from during the World Cup, despite being the biggest governmental institution still standing, because they have absolutely no power to do anything beyond trying to assign a few stadiums to a few matches so a World Cup can happen in this hellhole of a nation.

[Cassadaigua]

Ranucci Joins The Legends,
by Chelsea Dufresne, Concord Heights Times

It is a tradition that is not duplicated, to our knowledge, anywhere else in the World when it comes to their international soccer team. For most nations, certain numbers are revered for their legacy of the many greats who have worn it in the past. The #10, for example, is a number that is commonly reserved for the nation’s top offensive player, so when you have nations with extensive history in the competition, there will be many legendary players from that same nation who have worn that same number. To some nations, a kit number is nothing more then a representation of where the player plays on the pitch, and that is it. This is not the case in Cassadaigua.

Once a player does legendary things, the number they used to wear will never be worn again. The north end of Dagan Airways Stadium in Concord Heights has plaques honoring those who that extra-special player in front of a large representation of the number that they wore. To have this honor bestowed upon you, you have to have done a lot more then just have been an superstar. You have to have been legendary. Monument wall currently consists of the following numbers:

#1, for former goalkeeper Allison Salamida. An easy choice, as a two-time World Cup winning goalkeeper, who also went into coaching.

#5, for defender Michelle Fuller. Excellent with her positioning, Michelle could sneak into the offensive rush sometimes and score an odd goal if you weren’t paying enough attention to her.

#7, for defender Shannon Myers. A similar make up to Michelle Fuller, but it took a little longer for her to truly be recognized with the jersey retirement.

#10, for forward Brittany Lawton. Known for establishing “Britt’s Law” on the field. Also a locker room leader other then being a leading goal scorer.

#11, for forward Courtney Ferguson. Was not around for the World Cups, but was our first ever national team captain, accomplishing many great things early on.

#13, for midfielder Meaghan Bateman. She was a dominant player at her position on the World Cup winning teams.

#14, for forward Stacie Kerrigan-Fraser. Prolific goalscorer during her time. Just missed the World Cup teams, but played on key teams that were crucial to us rising in the ranks to get to that point. One-time CASE President.

#15, for defender Erica Lambert. A ruthless physical defender. But smart about it, and full of skill.

#17, for forward Jessica Schanke. A key component to our World Cup winning teams up front.

#18, for midfielder Taylor Connolly. Her time was after the World Cup run, but she established herself as an excellent two way player. She is the current president of CASE (Cassadagan Association for Soccer Excellence).

Those have been the numbers that have been retired by the national team, all of which were retired before the long time away from international competition. Upon returning, a young forward named Hannah Ranucci made an immediate impact, and led the team to its shocking qualification out of pot 6 in World Cup 79. Soon after, she was named the captain of the team, and seemed to thrive especially a couple years after playing professionally in Ceni. Cassadaigua got further and further, making the quarterfinals in World Cup 82, and then the semifinals in World Cup 83. The stage was set for her to win World Cup 84 at home, right here in Concord Heights, but it was not meant to be. Ranucci retired after that World Cup, but her legacy should always be remembered.

For Hannah, she was not always going to wear #33, but the kit number became a source of pride. “My preference was actually either #12 or #22. But each of them were taken at the time, so I was assigned #33. I was given a couple choices, but I did like the double numeral that it was. It was a higher number, even for a Cassadagan team, so I let it serve as a reminder for me that things were not easy for me to get here, and that I would continue to have to work hard, and smart, to maintain my place at this level. 12 did eventually become available when I was still young on this team, and I could have changed, but it wasn’t right. 33 was my number, and I wore it with pride.”

We asked Hannah when it she thought it was a chance that she could join the legendary players on Monument Wall. “Never,” she said, “I just never really thought about it. I kept going out there and wanted to make this team as good as it could be, and to try and make every game a little better then the game that had preceded it. I guess, after the last World Cup was over, I started to wonder about it somewhat, but that was more because I started to hear a lot of other people talking about it. This is just an amazing honor. There is no great honor that a Cassadagan soccer player can ever have as an individual.” Ranucci went on to thank all of her family, friends, and coaches that were integral in getting her to where she was able to get in her career. She says that not winning a World Cup will be a disappointment for her, but also realizes the difficulty in winning one. To have made it to the semifinals one time, she says, will have to be good enough.

The ceremony began with a podium set up in the vicinity of the northern wall, and Taylor Connolly, the CASE President began with a speech talking about the privilege, and went it meant for her to have had to honor bestowed on her as well. The only other living members who have their numbers retired are Brittany Lawton and Jessica Schanke, the latter of which is the grandmother of Rachel Schanke, as you already knew unless you live under a rock. Lawton and Schanke did not give speeches, but Connolly would then give way to Queen Cassie II who gave a speech of her own. In it, she gave Ranucci a ceremonial “key to the Palace”, calling her an honorable player who went about things the right way. An underrated component of Ranucci’s career at this level came in World Cup 81, when there was a lot of criticism about manager Stephanie Sweeney following the team underachieving in World Cup 80. Ranucci was vocal about supporting her manager, and now here we are, with Sweeney still serving as the manager of the team, having taken this team to the knockouts of the World Cup, at minimum, the last three occasions. Once the Queen was done with her talk, Ranucci’s plaque and large #33 on the wall were officially unveiled, to be permanently displayed. It is probably unlikely that another number from the current generation will be retired unless the team wins the World Cup, but one very good possibility could be Sierra Mattison’s #23, who has had a career very similar to Meaghan Bateman, but just without the World Cup titles. Zack Pierce could be a consideration as well for his #9, but he is still in the prime of his career. If he continues to be a factor as he is now, then his achievements could be given a little more weight given that he is a male. Other younger players, like Rachel Schanke and Meghan Wolcott seem possible one day, but it is too early to tell.

After all of this was complete, there was still soccer to play, and the Fillies carried the momentum of the ceremony and dominated play early on. They would be rewarded as the jumped out to a quick 2-0 lead. Rachel Schanke scored on a header from a corner kick that was delivered by Sierra Mattison in the 6th minute; then in the 16th, it was Zack Pierce from about twenty yards out, arcing the shot just under the cross bar, and over the stretched hand of Ziwana’s Jean Kane. The Leopards got one back in the 29th, from Charles Payen, but the two goal lead was restored before half time on a strike by Eddie Malone in the 41st minute, on a good looking passing play with Rachel Schanke.

While the Fillies were the better team in the early moments of the second half, the tide turned on them in the 55th minute Issa Swedi did well to catch the Dagans in the attack, and intercepting a pass, and sending a long ball forward to Abdulaziz Haqawi, who was able to beat Kelsey Morgan to cut the lead to 3-2. Cassadaigua was not phased by this all too much, and would again restore the two goal lead pretty quickly. In the 66th, Rachel Schanke’s initial shot was stopped by Kane, but the rebound went right to Meghan Wolcott, who was quick to react and fire it home before Kane could recover. Ziwana made the final result closer in the 1st minute of injury time , thanks to Jean Wilder, but it was too little too late as the pink and black celebrate their ninth win in nine games.

Everyone will leave happy today, and we are grateful that we were able to win on Hannah Ranucci day here in Concord Heights.

[Commonwealth of Baker Park]

George Anpoise dialed the special number that would begin the the process of the "rollup" of SPECOP Tortoise--the abrupt cessation of all the activity and quick removal of all the personnel involved.

"It's time?" Greg Milton betrayed no surprise in his tone and immediately upon answering the burner cellphone that was specifically for this purpose, started to move around his small flat gathering the essential items he'd need.

"Yeah, I'm at the office & started the DEWDROP routine. I'll call you back in 30 minutes." DEWDROP was a subroutine program that was loaded into a hard drive via a CD-ROM, then proceeded much like malware--destroying program files, severing O/S access to to saved documents & folders, corrupting data to make it unrecoverable.

Milton immediately called Kat Cundiff and told her to not speak, not ask questions, but do exactly as he told her. She should gather everything that could be carried in a large purse or shoulder bag; anything replaceable should be left behind. He instructed her to not answer the door for anyone but himself or George--three knocks would be the signal--and he would be there in 20 minutes.

'Greg Milton's' part of the operation was to ensure the safety of Cundiff at the conclusion of the Op; he was a specialist at 'mopping up' CIS activities, and had worked with George on a couple of previous occasions.

He left his vehicle running on the street outside the apartment block Cundiff had been living in since their arrival in Maccian; he knocked just as he said he would and she opened the door.
"What..."
"Have you got everything? He rattled off a list of items and she answered affirmatively to each one. "I'll explain in the car."

The drove away and she still was confused about everything. "Where are we going?"
"Back to Baker Park. Our work here is finished."

The burner rang again and Greg answered it promptly. "Yeah? We're 4 minutes out. Got it."

"That was George, we'll pick him up and be on our way to the rendezvous point. All I can tell you unofficially, Kat, George & I are with the CIS. We've been here on a mission. The mission's come to an unexpected end, so we are pulling out. Your safety has been a top priority throughout the whole time we've been here, specifically I've been responsible for you. Right now, there is a troop of the National Guard Special Operations Force on their way to collect and deliver us safely back home."

Kat was reeling from all of this info being related to her at once.
"Oh, when we get there, hop into the backseat, if you would, please?"

Milton made a quick u-turn right in the middle of the street and pulled up to the sidewalk, where George walked casually out of the building and replaced Kat in passenger seat. "You OK Kat? We're on our way home."
'George' spoke to her without the accent he'd used since their first meeting.
"I've only filled her in on the most basic info. I wasn't sure how much to expose her to."

George texted on his smartphone and attempted to give the young woman a bit more explanation. "I'm sorry we couldn't tell you anything about what was going on. I don't know if Milton told you, but we always kept your safety at the top of everything we did. You've become a good friend to both of us, but we have to ensure the op isn't compromised in any way."

Kat was feeling a bit less anxious as George spoke. "So we've been doing a secret mission all this time? Can I at least ask what was the thing that's supposed to happen?"

The men glanced at each other and George continued. "If they keep their nerve, and there's no guarantee they will, a group of survivors from South Toronto are in the process of attempting a coup to overthrow the government here."

Milton had been driving at increasing speeds as they made their way out of the city and into the dense forests that surrounded Audoti. "Someday Kat, you'll be able to tell your children and grandchildren that you were a secret agent for awhile, although you didn't know it while it was happening." He laughed and George gave a grin.
"Six minutes out. Take a left in 200 meters."

They came to a clearing about 400 meters square and George spoke over his shoulder to Kat. "We'll stay in the vehicle until the first chopper lands, then you'll need to get out and be ready to make a run for it once the second chopper touches down. That's the one we'll get aboard, OK? There will probably be a soldier who will find you, don't get alarmed if he grabs you a bit aggressively, that's just they way they are trained. OK?"
She spoke up confidently in reply. "I understand".

[Cheergirls]

After the scoreless draw, Meghan Banks tried to lighten the mood of the locker room after reading a clip from Atheist Democrat Freehold.

“Katie, can I asked you a question?” Meghan asked. “Are you really a boy?”

Katie looked at her weird and replied that she was not, knowing there was more to why Meghan was asking her such a strange a question.

Meghan grinned, “I was reading something from Atheist Democratic Freehold, I guess you answered a question for one of their reporters, but who ever it was called you a he. I mean, it was probably just a typo and all, but still was kind of funny.”

Katie smiled, “Guess the reporter needs some cocoabo to enhance his job performance!”

Meghan then got the rest of the room together, “So I was wondering if you all wanted to do an experiment for the next game, since we are now 4-1-0 since we began having the cocoa-bo milkshakes. Maybe not have them for the next game and see if there really is a difference in how we play?”

That got some blank stares from the room, and Tori Allison stepped up, “Meghan, we are about to have our hardest part of the schedule in the next three games. If anything, we should be doubling the amount of cocoa-bo in these drinks, and not stopping them!”

Daniella Catti then stepped up, “Tori, I think Meghan is on to something, though. It might be good to see if there really is a difference in how we are playing, or if our five game unbeaten streak right after we started it, is just a coincidence.”

Meghan grinned, “Well, we can think about it a little longer. It’s very tough three games coming up like you say. I just hope we do good!”

[Northwest Kalactin]

The Next Generation
As many players retire from soccer in the coming years in Northwest Kalactin, we need to start looking at who can become a star player on the National Team in the coming years.

Top Young Players
1. Thomas Butler, LW, Ballina Red Devils Academy, 17
His skill is unbelievable, he is the future of soccer in Northwest Kalactin. Since playing as a 13 year old at the Ballina Red Devils Academy, Butler has been improving since he was a child and turning into the soccer player he is now. He is a very good athlete that out play anyone with his insane skill and is a very versatile player. Butler may become a starter next cycle, when he is 19 years old, which would be an amazing feat for any player to accomplish.

2. William Bennett, ST, Fountain of Youth International, Striker, 16
After playing in Banija he was declared ineligible for 1 year after the Banija youth league changed their age regulations. He scored many of the goals last year on the worst team in the league in Banija so it is still wondered if he can lead a team well. Bennett is a very good goal scorer that can look to help the Kalactanians in the future, he is expected to play on the national team first when he is 22 during the 88th World Cup cycle.

3. Harold Hall, GK, Fountain of Youth Gold Coast, 18
Harold will play on a struggling FoY GC team this year that will struggle to score many goals this year. Hall will try to become a centerpiece in Kalactanian soccer after Jakerein retires. He could look to become a starter on the team as early as WC 87 and possibly be a reserve on next cycles team. Hall is a very athletic goalie that uses his athleticism to become a player that can easily save shots that are far from him.

4. Scott Ward, CM, Ballina FC Youth, 18
Ward is a player that can play any position on the field at any time needed. He has enough skill to play defender and also the offensive touch to play striker. That being said however, Ward isn’t a player that will become a star on the National Team. He is more of a player that will use his talents to become a trustworthy, durable player that can stay on the Team for a majority of his career and not get hurt. He will be expected to start first in the 88th or 89th World Cup.

What Does This Mean
This shows that the Kalactanians are in no shortage of strikers and midfielders that will be able to support the team as they continue their offensive style of play. Bennett and Butler will both be very important in making sure that the team can score many goals in the future. Hall will also very much help the team in not giving up a huge amount of goals, just like Jakerein has helped the team on defense. Jimmy McCarthy will have some great young teammates to team up with during his prime years and that will help him continue the tradition of great offense of the team. Matt Hall will have to continue running the defense on his own with not many other young defenders to help out Hall when he starts to play in goal. Ward will be a very trustworthy player that the team can count on to support the offense along with empowering the defense also.

[Tequilo]

TAPALUPÉ, Tequilo - Today in your new favourite magazine we continue our new series for those unfamiliar with pitxi in Tequilo by looking at some of the biggest teams in the country. Rumour that these features are prepatory material for the new IFCF-focused blog are completely wide of the mark of course; they are here to help followers of the World Cup navigate the ins and outs of domestic football that underpins the new World Cup campaign.

In this series, we go state by state to look at the teams in that region that qualify for the nomination of 10-Nacional; that is to say, the top ten teams in the country based on the number of state championships won. In this edition we look at Maranco State, the largest state by area and home to a host of top quality clubs that don’t quite make the 10-Nac: Motozintla, Xicoans, Las Guías Oriente, Alianza Tirinto, Continente Tulan… so tight is the state championship that it has been shared more widely than any other of the six states, meaning fewer titles each, and only one team making the top ten across the nation - Resplendiente.

But first - what happened to Los Pitxileros in World Cup qualifying? Let’s fire up the Copametro to find out…

DASK MORE LIKE IT
Daskel 0-3 TEQUILO HT: 0-2

Location: Mautineso National Stadium, Daskel Att: 0
SCORERS: Tlacolotl 8’ Sukè 42’ Callañaupa 72’

Los Pitxileros looked in commanding form behind closed doors in the Mautineso Stadium, getting somewhere toward recalling their best days back in the Baptism of Fire last year with a solid win over Daskel, to secure two wins on the bounce for the first time in this tournament. With Isaac Martí putting his faith in young faces, it was the attacking midfield three (average age 18 years 3 months) who dominated proceedings in the first half, setting up Tlacolotl, 19, for the first and then Masango Sukè, 17, striking the second before half time to give Tequilo a well deserved two goal advantage heading into the break. They say the third goal is the vital one when a game sits delicately poised at 2-0, and it was an older head in the returning Callañaupa who settled it midway through the second half, although it could easily have been more. Niño Pinto, the youngest player on the field, controlled the game from his advanced midfield position to get the man of the match award as Los Pitxileros set themselves high up the park and defended well even from there.

The pressure seems to have eased on coach Martí as Tequilo move into the top half of the qualifying table and incredibly, after a glass half empty sort of showing until recently, find themselves only two points off a qualification spot as no-one behind The Holy Empire seems to be able to get on a good run of form. How we would all love to hit that form with three wins in a row, but Mattijana are up next and they will be smarting from a surprise home defeat to Indusse. This was always going to be one of the tough ties of group, and is the biggest home tie of the first half of qualifying - it is all to play for. Geraitz Minha picked up a knock in the game but Patrick Zambo returns and will go straight into the left back position, while Chicchan also returns for Huachalla. Otherwise coach Martí must be very happy with his blend right now and opts not to change anything further forward than the back line.

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Starting Line-Up for TEQUILO vs. Mattijana:
Bienvenida | Zambo, Apeiztegui (Capitan), Huracán, Chicchan | Callañuapa | Vilca Hualla, Niño Pinto, Sukè | Gorostola & Tlacolotl

WHERE ARE THEY NOW?
What ever happened to Râmón Tüjânger?

The Tequiloa have something of a special admiration for Farves - there is a natural affinity with a nation of people who easily match them for Shambolic Quotient, and at the same time, are inherently good at working to the pace of Tequilotime, at finding things that were never lost, at carnivalismo and all that entails, and at the pitxi. Welcome foreigners in Tequiloan society, there has been a long connection between the peoples of the powerhouse Farfadillis and the, um, less powerhouse, of Tequilo; and more recently, with the woes back home, Farves have been migrating in ever larger numbers for a bit of peace and quiet. Well, perhaps not quiet. Through history there have been much admired Farves playing at many clubs, of all levels, but none more so perhaps than Râmón Tüjânger, The King of Cooperativa who captained a modest club of the city of Quetodino to a record-equalling four consecutive Ocotapa state championships, something only CF Franxizko-A had done before and no-one has done since. With Râmón in the side, they were virtually unbeatable; and the man was not only a club legend but in his day the biggest sporting celebrity in the country. Back home he had hardly been heard of, as he found out when he hung up his boots after retirement and headed to the mother country to tell his story. Although a curiosity at bookshop talks and a welcome dinner party guest if there was a Tequiloan involved, he was largely ignored or brushed off. His enterprises a failure in Farfadillis, he returned to his adopted nation to rekindle his love affair with the country as the most famous foreigner in all the wide lands of the Resplendent Jackdaw, only to find he had been superseded by the even more legendary foreigner Oooóooos, or, as Râmón called him, ‘that bloody Audioslav’. Not that he was bitter - to this day in the out-of-the-way city of Quetodino, he is still a moderate kind of royalty, and will always be the King of Cooperativa. He still lives there with his family, where he went on to become a Professor of Probability Mechanics, and can often be found, contradictorily, frequenting the Bayesian Lounge; where he enjoys Midday beer, darts, and causing minor ripples in the fabric of mathematical reality. I think. Probably.

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10-NACIONAL
Part 2/6 - Maranco State

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The largest of the six former countries that now make up the vast nation of Tequilo, Maranco State is a blend of major conurbations such as the city of Tirinto (pop. 6.6 million) and Matiguá (4.3 million), the vast open reaches of the Great Prairie which was the traditional plains-home of the Xico people, centre on the ancient city-state and modern tourist attraction of Xico-Comitán, and the high Sierra Muralla chain with it’s famous mountain cities of La Milega and La Conon. The vast state has no shortage of famous pitxi teams, perhaps none more so than Motozintla from the capital; but Moto come up short after a barren spell in the last decade or so and surprisingly to some, they don’t make the Big 10 in Tequilo - that honour belongs to to team from La Conon in the mountains; in a competitive state championship, it is Resplendiente, 15 times state champions, who are the sole 10-Nacional representative from Maranco State, with Moto now two titles behind; Xicoans, Las Guías Oriente, Alianza Torinto and Continente Turan all have titles into double figures.

RESPLENDIENTE
Maranco State Champions: 15 times; most recent season 118 (five seasons ago)
Copa Tequila Winners: 3 times; most recent season 119 (four years ago) including one double
Stadium: Estadio Grajo Resplendiente (El Nido Cuervo), La Conon, Maranco
Capacity: 62,800
Nicknames: Los Cuervos, Las Platasnegras
Colours: Black & silver striped shirts with light blue trim, white shorts, black socks
Alternate: Light blue shirts & shorts, white socks
Current Manager: Ilhicadira
Team Captain: Isaías Magrina - Striker
Young Prospect: Kâásîmîró Êrsáreng (FFD) - Striker

The black-and-silvers have a reputation in Tequilo for style, for attacking prowess and for shaking up the elite, harking from the smaller regional city of La Conon (population 350,000) where they have fanatical following and no serious competitor locally, making them one of the biggest supported ‘local’ clubs, as they like to style themselves. It doesn’t stop them from shopping widely for players, and they have often carried a number of foreign stars within their team. Presently they have a much more homegrown feel but do contain two youngsters from abroad that they consider wonderkids in the making - midfielder Laurent Lapix from Reçesión¹ and forward Kâásîmîró Êrsáreng of Encuentrodillo²: both 17, they are real hot prospects about to make their bow in the State Championship and, if the betting is anything to go by, the post-season Liga-TQ, where the national champion and the top 18 placings are decided.

Resplendiente’s main rivals are Motozintla from the state capital Tirinto and Oriente from Aticenta, the three of them traditionally fighting it out for the top spot in the state championships and for the crown of ‘best supported’ - Las Platasnegras certainly win this one and at present are two titles ahead of Moto and three from Oriente, both of whom have fallen on barren times a little recently and are smarting from being outside of the national ‘Big Ten’. This season you can’t look much past the black-and-silvers for the state and possibly the national title, with a host of top class starters including the national team’s first choice left back Patrick Zamba and much-admired Tamarindian midfielder Emanuel Fonseca.

First Team

Goalkeepers: Tepin Mecatl-Rubió, Román Pousa, Camilo Maroto
Defenders: Patrick Zamba, Chipahua Tapayaxi, Franco Murillo, Ángel Palau, Aaron Palau, Tomas Campany, Cristóbal Sarmiento, Erick Ruiz, Baptiste Ndòsi
Midfielders: Emanuel Fonseca (TAM), Cihuaxahual-Ohpa, Jeremías Carballal, Christopher Morterero, Laurent Lapix (RCN), Juan José Aguayo, Gonzalo Pomar, Javier Manzanares, Mizquicotl
Forwards: Isaías Magrina, Ichtaca Chimalmina, Kâásîmîró Êrsáreng (FFD), Valentin Farikou, Nochcotzin

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RÚI de Los ROVAS
Rúi Raza & the family company are back!

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Read on as we go looking for Raza Generation #5 - that’s Rodi Raza-Shearer, Rita’s son, now signing apprentice terms at great-great grandfather Rúi’s old club Blackburn Rovers, once conquerors of the world, and now bouncing around the lower tiers of ‘The Football League’. Rúi being a bit of a traditionalist is unhappy that Rodi has gone for the new trend of a double-barrelled surname, especially another one enshrined in Rovers history - Rodi’s estranged dad’s great uncle Alan Shearer, who briefly shone in a Rovers revival before moving on to (supposedly) better things at traditionally hapless Newcastle United. Rúi was always a bit threatened by Alan, despite his unassailable position as immortal at Rovers. Meanwhile Roni and Rita head to Germany and the ‘Bundesliga’ to talk to a new client - young Jadon Sancho, a teen sensation. About three hundred clubs have been linked with him, but is his heart really set on Manchester United as it says in all the gossip columns?

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NEXT TIME
What’s Up In The Next Issue of GOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL-a!!!

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Coming soon - In the next edition of Extra we’ll be taking a break from the 10-Nacional on bye day to explore some of the fascinating characters from the pantheon of The Shambolic Tradition, or Confusiónismo, especially those patron wights of pitxi - who invokes what, and for why? We also ask, whatever happened to Oooóooos - and you make be shocked to hear he is still alive; and is romance still alive for Rúi de Los Rovas, aged 125? Find out this and more, only in your GOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL-a!!! Extra. Only ¢35 from all major news outlets.

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FOOTNOTES
1Reçueçn
1Farfadillis

[Jeruselem]

Princess Katherine Annabelle Dallas in Welzat.

Hello this is Princess Katherine Annabelle Dallas for Naked News Jeruselem. Once again we're overseas, and another day in world cup 85 qualification. It's match day 9, and after our win at home, we fight to qualify after looking in bad spot early in qualification. But we're making progress! Some exciting results today. We aren't playing Sarzonia today, Daisy misread the schedule but that happens when people have byes.

Let's have a look at the other games to put this one in context.
Simpralia at home drew with Delaclava who really needs a few wins now. 1-1 but both teams are in need more points, not from draws.
Nephara crushed visitors Aimena 5-0 and are still undefeated. Aimena didn't have hope, as Nephara had destroyed Darmen 3-1 the game before.
Great Lausitz hasn't had a great of it, and had Darmen visit them. Not ideal but they upset Darmen 1-0 in the upset in this group. Well, it proves anyone can have a bad day even one of the best teams in the group.
Huayramarca should have had an easier time with visitors South Charlia, who aren't doing that well. But somehow they tripped over and lost to South Charlia 2-1.
Sarzonia off the bye were at home and beat Competitive Solitaire, who proved a bit difficult to brush off.

So with Darmen losing two games in a row, and they were 2nd on the table. Nephara proving once again too strong to be threatened today.
We had 3rd and 4th on the table facing off, that's us and Welzat.

Like most of the other Group 7 games, it seems defense is now more important than just goals. Another low scoring game, but both sides were determined not to allow the other to score. The mindset of the team seems to have changed and it's resulting in far less goals but we're not letting in 4 to 5 goals a game which was happening at one point. Jeruselem scored the winning goal and held on to win. I mean it's not pretty or exciting but we're winning. Winning is end result, we can't afford to fall too far behind the leader. There's other teams who are in contention and well, take advantage of any slipups.

Well and the table just flipped! Nephara are leading on 22 points. Jeruselem are suddenly 2nd on 16, and Darmen 3rd also on 16. Sarzonia making their move up as well to 4th spot with 15 points. Welzat slip back to 5th, on 14 points. Simpralia on 13 in 6th. Huayramarca on 11, 7th. Acronius on 10, 8th. Great Lausitz on 9 as is Aimena, 9th and 10th. Delaclava 8 points in the bottom 3 ahead of Competitive Solitaire on 8 but their goal difference really sucks. South Charlia last.

Don't get too excited! We have to face off with Sarzonia and Nephara still. Those teams we know will not give away anything. We have to hold our ground, and stay strong with competition far from over. It's not half way yet, we have put ourselves into a good position so we can launch a successful 2nd half of qualification. We've made mistakes but better now than later.

Yes, the coach Boris has been talking to our rival network the Mann Network's reporters too. He's allowed to. I can't work out why he grooms his hair for them but wears the mop when I talk to him. Anyway, he's doing his job right for now so I can't complain. See you all later at home. We have 3 games left for this first half and we have some tricky games to negotiate soon.

OOC
Group 7
Simpralia 1–1 Delaclava
Welzat 0–1 Jeruselem
Nephara 5–0 Aimena
Great Lausitz 1–0 Darmen
Huayramarca 1–2 South Charlia
Sarzonia 1–0 Competitive Solitaire