GCF World Twenty20 Championship XIV - everything thread

[Ko-oren]

The Dragonflies have secured a place in the World T20 Championship final! Crowds at big screens across the six cricket regions, as well as sports bars nationwide celebrated well into the early evening with some holdouts keeping the party going through the night. Cricket's impact on the national scene is clearly visible now, as even cities like Gehrenna and Aminey are starting to show signs of cricket fandom - the efforts of the baseball community to conquer the same markets be damned. The best shots of the night were on repeat all evening, night, and morning across online media, just how only T20 can generate a highlight reel's worth of moments in a single match. That's not a slight towards ODI or Test cricket, but T20 seems to be doing more for the domestic growth of the game right now.

In the final, Gruenberg awaits. It's the winners of T20WC 5 versus the winners of the eighth and thirteenth edition. So far, only Apox (5-6) and West Phoenicia (10-11) have managed to appear in back-to-back finals, and now the Dragonflies are in that list as well. Let's look at how both teams got here.

Group A                   Pld   W  D  L  Pts 
2 Ko-oren                     6   4  0  2    8  Q

  Group C                   Pld   W  D  L  Pts 
1 Gruenberg                   6   4  0  2    8  Q

Gruenberg finished first in a group with 4 wins after starting out with a bye and a loss, but wins over the Grearish Union, Darmen, and West Phoenicia quickly ended rumours that the Gruenbergers were in no shape to get anywhere. Meanwhile, Ko-oren started with a win over Krytenia (that's called foreshadowing) and followed it up with a hit-and-miss series of matches. A loss to the two-win Lisander and Alice Bay team (that's one loss, not two), a win over Vilita and Turori and Quebec and Shingoryeo (that's two wins, not four) and thereby beating some of our biggest rivals across the sporting multiverse, their history in cricket notwithstanding, was a great way to get the general public hyped. Never mind the loss to Bollonich as they otherwise laid waste to the group, ending up with five wins. Until the very end, it looked like Krytenia and Ko-oren were destined for the same record, but their loss to Rundel confirmed it: the head-to-head would be the decider. And there it was: that win over the bastards in cyan rekindled our miracle run.

Ko-oren 186/5 (18.5 overs)
Darmen 183/2 (20 overs)
Ko-oren win by 5 wickets

Gruenberg 138/3 (13.2 overs)
Fodhla 135/6 (20 overs)
Gruenberg win by 7 wickets

In round two, the Dragonflies got to deal with our oldest and fiercest rivals in most sports, but certainly cricket, Darmen. The All Greens set a formidable target, and the Dragonflies cut it close but won with seven balls to spare. The Gruenbergers were back in the hotel early with a win after 13.2 overs and got to enjoy an afternoon off.

The Sarian 148/5 (20 overs)
Ko-oren 152/5 (17.3 overs)
Ko-oren win by 5 wickets

Gruenberg 185/9 (17.2 overs)
West Phoenicia 182/5 (20 overs)
Gruenberg win by 1 wicket

Up next came two great challenges. One were the most recent ODI trophy winners, the other have been all-round cricket behemoths for a while. The finalists took about the same time to beat their opponents, after 17.2 and 17.3 overs in the chase. It has to be said that Gruenberg faced a much higher target - on a friendlier pitch - while Ko-oren had to get to 149 and did so by tying it up first and then finding a gap in the outfield for four.

Ko-oren 145/5 (14.1 overs)
Pratapgadh 141 (17.4 overs)
Ko-oren win by 5 wickets

Baggieland 154/4 (20 overs)
Gruenberg 164/5 (20 overs)
Gruenberg win by 10 runs

And then, the most recent matches. Gruenberg delivered a nail biter against Baggieland - congratulations to them on coming this far - by defending a target of 165. That's squarely in both competing realms of "defendable" and "chasable" - but by taking the Throstles to the very last over, they had earned their spot. The Throstles didn't go down easily with almost all wickets still in hand when it came to the final five overs, but ultimately couldn't force the run rate up enough. The Dragonflies, meanwhile, enjoyed a Pratapgadh collapse from 3/99 at the halfway point to 6/121 four overs later. They were panicking, but not completely lost and made their remaining wickets count for a fairly low total of 142. They did secure a few late boundaries to make it interesting, and on that pitch, anything could happen. And so Lyness and Penn got to work, learning from the mistakes from the first innings. The ground was suited for longer formats as well, and even though the ropes were brought in for easier run scoring in short formats, it certainly wasn't like some of the grounds used in Ko-orenite domestic T20. To play a match of this caliber at a ground of that caliber was still an experience to be treasured by all players, of course. Penn misjudged the length of a Kakadia delivery and went out on LBW. Risewell also didn't last long, forcing a lofted ball into the outfield to the welcoming hands of Gadia. The two early warnings were well heeded by the rest of the team and Lyness paired up with Letchford for a long partnership. 2/65 was as far as they got, and from then on we only saw short partnerships working with whatever skills were at bat. Letchford and Taylor were easily dealt with as two fairly conventional lefties, but Taylor and Hunniford consistenly got each other on strike and the left-right combo offered some surprise at least - it was only the second right-handed batsman of the day after Risewell. Lastly it was Hunniford and yMwffrael to take the target as early as the 15th over, methodically punishing gaps in fielding and weighing their chances on lofted shots. The Pratapsquadh unfortunately couldn't stretch their own innings long enough.

And so Ko-oren is going to the final hoping to limit Gruenberg's run scoring abilities: with the exception of Darmen, the other opponents were all too willing to drop caution and lose wickets in key moments to a creative Green and Blue bowling attack. Gruenberg showed signs of this in the West Phoenicia match - and so between two teams that don't meet all that often but go consistenly far in cricket tournaments, it'll be interesting to see how far video analysis takes you.

[Gruenberg]

Match report posted on the GruenCric website.

Gruenberg reach final. Somehow.

There was a moment towards the end of the semi-final between Gruenberg and Baggieland at The Bastion when Garry Greenidge skipped out to a knee-high full-toss from Jett Tyrkkekkekklukkekklukekk and hammered the ball to the cover boundary; Nurples Honk did not need to move. Two attempts at catching it later, the ball had been dumped over the advertising hoardings along the boundary rope for six. It was something you might expect from a one-way walkover, a total collapse of every basic cricketing skill from a side whose spinner could not even land the ball on the inviting surface and whose fielders could not reel in the kind of chance that would be waved off in fielding practice as too easy to bother with. One over later, that side won and advanced to the World T20 Final.

Despite the failure of almost their entire batting lineup and only having two reliable bowlers, despite leaden running between the wickets and cack-handed fielding from everyone but their wicket-keeper, Gruenberg have returned to their third World T20 final. They won the fifth edition, lost the seventh to long time rivals, and will now face the defending champions, Ko-oren, on a return visit to the Park Central Oval. On the face of it, the Dragonflies look the favourites on form, recent experience, and basic ability to catch a ball travelling a moderate distance in the air without falling down and dying. But such an analysis fails to take into the account the key ingredient that has powered Gruenberg’s slightly improbable run to the finals: sheer, bravura, unrelenting shithousery.

Coming into the tournament the scope on Gruenberg was a reversion to heavy use of spin – the squad carried the possibility of a legitimate 20 overs of spin tactic – and an equally dependence on the bat of Ettexinor Broimbles. Instead, while Quouodan Skejjibox has been quietly impressive, pace bowler Transportflowmap Renkauer has been the team’s most important contributor. Here again at Dover, he went wicketless but went at better than a run-a-ball economy as his mix of short balls and inswinging yorkers hurried and harried the Throstles’ batters. And while Broimbles did at last come good, scoring a breezy 68 on a pitch every other batter struggled for timing on, with deft, dancing feet to the spinners, it comes at the tail end of a largely flat tournament for him, his first fifty after a series of attractive but insubstantial cameos.

For all Broimbles’s lustrous pedigree as heir-apparent to Benny Enchante, it has been the workmanlike domestic journeyman Chthchibvuel Thchthaarheq who has been the most consistent bat (until, against Baggieland, they reversed roles, Broimbles dropping patient anchor while Thchthaarheq flashed three boundaries and then hit a stinging drive straight down long-on’s throat). The much-hyped Tyrkkekkekklukkekklukekk has barely played in deference to the austere religious scholar Skejjibox. And amid the hand-wringing over the lack of a seam all-rounder, seasoned pro Brigveger Grovan has turned back the years with some lusty thumping down the order and a reliable string of yorkers, including a fantastic death over in the semi-final to frustrate Greenidge: needing 14 to win, he found just three runs off the first four balls, and his back pad off the fifth.

Gruenberg have fielded woefully, it’s true, with the honourable exception of dazzlingly sharp wicket-keeper Ystipug Contemnible, who pulled off a blinding leg-side stumping off Tyrkkekkekklukkekklukekk and a more routine one when Skejjibox drifted one past Marshall’s outside edge. Dropped catches, missed stops, balls kicked over boundaries, a failure to hit the stumps when needed, and plentiful overthrows. On the other hand, captain Funvorgious Ventreltraxibung has generally been unafraid to keep his few competent fielders, Broimbles and Hraff’ Tumcoweiss, in attacking positions. At Dover he posted Broimbles at short cover and Tumcoweiss at short mid-wicket, and left Billy Richards looking ready to chew through his own bat in frustration as they cut off single after single.

Ventreltraxibung has, of course, been central, both for his sharp captaincy and his batting, about as sharp as a particularly blunt pencil that’s missing all its lead, and wood, and is basically just the rubber on the end rolling around uselessly. He once again poked around uselessly at Dover and was relieved to miss a Shackleton straight one, but his presence in the field was dynamic. After a tournament heavy on seam, he unashamedly dropped iiPiqup Fizbin for Tyrkkekkekklukkekklukekk and, though the young leg-spinner was expensive, he did take the key wicket of Richards with a massive googly that ripped past his leg stump to leave him stranded. A tumbling Contemnible did the rest. Ventreltraxibung shuffled his bowlers, at times in one over bursts, bowled Renkauer from both ends, and had his own little moment in the sun when he posted Thchthaarheq at an odd short square leg position, leaving midwicket invitingly open. Smith flicked a boundary, Grovan persisted with his straight line, and the next glance, fractionally ill-directed, thumped straight into Thchthaarheq’s midriff.

Of course, no amount of clever captaincy can make up for the fact he simply does not look an international standard batsman, and Ventreltraxibung will know that the final against the Dragonflies will certainly be his last in the green and purple. But he has an opportunity to prove the GCB’s faith in him right. If he somehow fashions a victory – and leads Gruenberg to a world title, something neither Zambuimmi Hengtridan (Sr.) nor Benny Enchante ever managed – he will carve out his own little place in the annals of a very goat-enabled cricketing history. And then, hopefully, fuck off back to the nets to learn how to play the short ball.

[Liventia]

Third place playoff
Pratapgadh 176/6 (20 overs)
Baggieland 180/6 (20 overs)
Baggieland win by either 4 runs or 4 wickets

[Rundel]

The Annasholm Sentinel

In a rare example of theological disagreement, representatives of the Skurgway have voiced different opinions on whether the use of popular image-sharing sites is an affront to goodness and righteousness. "Yea, verily, it is well to mingle our ordinary box scores with the popular viral images that are screen-captured from other accounts!" hailed Evjin Magofur. "Doth the same spirit that compels us to righteous indignation when we behold the folly and pathetic behavior of mankind not also manifest itself in fervent religious union, or even the faint imitation thereof created by international sporting events? We ought not think ourselves above common things, but rather, rejoice in the solidarity that binds us and photojournalists across the world as one!"

"Lo, it is the path of the slothful to do their formatting in automated spreadsheets," preached Megthel Reckal. "Indeed, the great hypocrites are they who think that by 'sharing' their 'epic ownage' of rival political factions, that they themselves are without sin. How can we subject the weak and frail to such displays of performative outrage? Store up for yourselves not treasures made of pixels, but rather labor to align your columns without numerical aids, as is seemly so to do."

Rundel are excused from any further clashes over these matters in the near future, as they have completed the fourteenth Twenty20 Championship with a sixth-place finish in Liventia.

[Baggieland]

[Liventia]

Final
Ko-oren 159/6 (20 overs)
Gruenberg 161/5 (20 overs)
Gruenberg win by either 2 runs or 5 wickets

World Twenty20 ranks, post-WT20 XIV

Rank	Nation			Total
1	Ko-oren			37.024
2	Liventia		32.389
3	The Plough Islands	26.963
4	Pratapgadh		25.779
5	Darmen			25.289
6	Elejamie		24.236
7	Gruenberg		22.474
8	Damukuni		21.826
9	West Phoenicia		21.201
10	Krytenia		19.892
11	Ethane			17.779
12	The Sarian		16.961
13	Sylestone		16.678
14	Baggieland		16.622
15	Eastfield Lodge		16.440
16	The Grearish Union	16.110
17	Hebitaka		15.998
18	Rundel			15.317
19	Mattijana		15.165
20	Lisander and Alice Bay	14.596
21	Bollonich		13.357
22	Barunia			13.131
23	Fodhla			11.428
24	Kriegiersien		11.248
25	Busoga Islands		 9.664
26	Uncertainty		 9.498
27	Dryicor			 9.350
27	Garbelia		 9.350
29	Sajnur			 8.253
30	New Jacobland		 6.926
30	Quebec and Shingoryeo	 6.926
30	Sannyamathland		 6.926
30	Starblaydia	 	 6.926
30	TJUN-ia			 6.926
35	Apox			 5.769
36	Al Wadiya		 5.250
36	Central Shaneville	 5.250
38	Indusse			 4.878
39	Vilita and Turori	 4.502
40	Northwest Kalactin	 3.889
40	The Jovannic		 3.889
42	Teusland		 3.781
43	Greater Kamilistan	 2.528
44	Tornado Queendom	 2.350
45	Arjunnagar		 2.078
45	Kashyaps		 2.078
45	Malandrin		 2.078
48	Tulize			 1.635

[Gruenberg]

(Provisional) match details as posted on the GruenCric website.

Ko-oren 159-6 (20 overs)
                                                          R    B   4/6
A Lyness                     b Grovan                    86  (62)  9/3
S Penn                   lbw b Tumcoweiss                 4   (3)  1/-
B Risewell   c Renkauer      b Grovan                    21  (19)  3/-
L Letchford  c Contemnible+  b Tyrkkekkekklukkekklukekk   1   (3)  -/-
R Taylor     st Contemnible+ b Skejjibox                  6   (9)  -/-
E Hunniford+                 b Tyrkkekkekklukkekklukekk   6   (7)  -/-
C yMwffrael  NOT OUT                                     20  (11)  2/-
M Enright    NOT OUT                                     13   (6)  -/2
Did not bat: W Thrall, G Hooligan*, L yPipaem
EXTRAS (1b, 1wb)                                          2

FoW: 1: 24 (Penn, 2.1 overs); 2: 84 (Risewell, 10.4 overs); 3: 98 (Letchford, 12.3 overs); 4: 118 (Taylor, 15.4 overs); 5: 120 (Lyness, 16.1 overs); 6: 128 (Hunniford, 17.4 overs)

                          O    M    R    W
Tumcoweiss                4    0   27    1
Broimbles                 1    0   16    0
Renkauer                  3    0   24    0
Grovan                    4    0   28    2
Tyrkkekkekklukkekklukekk  4    0   41    2
Skejjibox                 4    0   22    1

Gruenberg 161-5 (20 overs)
                                                R    B   4/6
FLIB Ventreltraxibung* c Letchford b Enright   33  (22)  4/-
NQX Honk                           b Hooligan   1   (3)  -/-
EME Broimbles          c Thrall    b Hooligan  54  (34)  6/2
CCLOG Thchthaarheq             lbw b yPipaem   26  (29)  -/-
HAYW Tumcoweiss        c Taylor    b Hooligan  34  (30)  2/2
ZVEU Hengtridan Jr.    NOT OUT                  6   (2)  1/-
YQB Contemnible+       NOT OUT                  0   (0)  -/-
Did not bat: JTT Tyrkkekkekklukkekklukekk, BPGV Grovan, TIMTAM Renkauer, QD Skejjibox
EXTRAS (1lb, 6wb)                               7

FoW: 1: 10 (Honk, 1.1 overs); 2: 71 (Ventreltraxibung, 8.1 overs); 3: 97 (Broimbles, 10.4 overs); 4: 149 (Thchthaarheq, 18.6 overs); 5: 155 (Tumcoweiss, 19.4 overs)

            O    M    R    W
Thrall      4    0   40    0
Hooligan    4    0   37    3
yPipaem     3    0   19    1
yMwffael    3    0   18    0
Enright     4    0   34    1
Taylor      2    0   12    0

Ko-oren innings
Powerplay: 55-1 (Lyness 41, Risewell 9)
A Lyness: 50 in 36 balls, 6x4 2x6 (Ko-oren 70-1)
2nd wicket: 50 in 45 balls (Lyness 33, Risewell 17)

Gruenberg innings
Powerplay: 56-1 (Broimbles 33, Ventreltraxibung 22)
2nd wicket: 50 in 34 balls (Broimbles 35, Ventreltraxibung 16)
EME Broimbles: 50 in 28 balls, 6x4 2x6 (Gruenberg 86-2)
4th wicket: 50 in 45 balls (Tumcoweiss 27, Thchthaarheq 25)

Match result: Gruenberg win by 5 wickets
Match award: EME Broimbles
Series result: Gruenberg win the 14th GCF World T20

Gruenberg claim title on final ball thriller

After 131 matches, the fate of the 14th GCF World T20 was settled on the very final ball of the final game. Garfield Hooligan had to defend 2 runs to avoid a Super Over; Zambuimmi Hengtridan Jr. needed 3 for win outright.

The ball… – a fast outswinging yorker.

The shot… – a skip to leg and a cover drive hammered with one foot in the air.

The fielder… – William Thrall, diving at full length on the deep extra cover boundary.

The outcome… – a boundary that grazed Thrall’s fingertips but rolled over the ropes.

The celebrations… – wild, disbelieving, and utterly goat-enabled.

When there’s occasion for a more sober review of the match, Gruenberg may reflect the game should never have been so close. When Ettexinor Broimbles – and, astonishingly, Funvorgious Ventreltraxibung, who chose the auspicious moment of the final of the world championship to find his touch – were rocketing along, adding 61 runs off 7 overs, Ko-oren’s 159 looked easily within sight. But Ventreltraxibung top-edged a needless sweep, and Broimbles, having brought up his second fifty in as many games, rediscovered an old fallibility, roughed up by a sharp over of bouncers from Lesomhof yPipaem, whose captain Hooligan then reaped the rewards with another short ball that Broimbles ducked into, spiralling a difficult but catchable – and indeed, caught – chance to somehow-not-a-Harry-Potter-character-Lucius Letchford.

Chthchibvuel Thchthaarheq, Gruenberg’s best batsman through the tournament, chose the very worst moment to utterly run out of form. He did not middle a ball yet couldn’t even convincingly get himself out as he laboured against the Dragonflies’ quicks; at the other end, Hraff’ Tumcoweiss, promoted on account of Hengtridan Jr.’s terrible tournament with the bat, mixed a couple of lustrous boundaries with some airy swipes as he took guard against the short ball with feet planted alongside the square leg umpire. Still the two accumulated a steady crawl to the line, but then yPipaem finally swung one into Thchthaarheq’s pads, leaving Hooligan with 11 to defend off the final over, with a badly out of nick Hengtridan Jr. striding to the wicket.

The win probability chart from the final over resembled the cardiac moments of Gruenberg’s watching fans: two hopeless swishes from Tumcoweiss had them down on the ground, before an astonishing six, wrapping the bat around himself and planting the ball twenty rows deep in the crowd. Needing 5 off 3, he sensed glory and tried to repeat the trick, but this time the ball barely left the square, pocketed at cover by Ronald Taylor. Hengtridan Jr. bristled with nervous energy as he took his guard with no time to play himself in, and hacked an inside edge an inch from his leg stump. He and Ystipug Contemnible scampered two (Hengtridan Jr.’s dive left his shirtfront smeared with dust). 2 for the tie were needed now, and a Super Over. Instead, he came up with perhaps the only sweetly struck shot he has hit since arriving in Liventia. It was a good moment to do it.

Earlier, Gruenberg had restricted Ko-oren to 159 despite an impressive 86 from Alois Lyness, who might have had a hundred had he not been forced to hit out as his partners struggled to find the same timing. Finger spinners Tumcoweiss and Quouodan Skejjibox kept things tight in the middle overs, while Jett Tyrkkekkekklukkekklukekk, bravely picked ahead of iiPiqup Fizbin, was more expensive but came up with two key wickets, Contemnible clinging onto a fine catch when Letchford fine edged a drive, and then, gloria!, Hunniford seeing a huge googly rip back into him and take out his leg pole. From the 11th to 18th overs, Gruenberg’s bowlers had taken 5 wickets for 44 runs. It meant Chaddwf yMwffrael and Mitchell Enright’s effective biffing wasn’t enough to get the Dragonflies up to a defensible total.

Tournament review

Gruenberg collected their second World T20 title in different circumstances to the first. While spinners were still important, it was their seamers, especially Brigveger Grovan and Transportflowmap Renkauer, who led the wicket-taking. With the big name batters Benny Enchante and Eightyseven Otterbiscuits gone, and with Ettexinor Broimbles finding his form only in the last two matches and Zambuimmi Hengtridan Jr. only on the very last ball, they had to instead rely on the lower middle order for runs, with journeyman pro Chthchibvuel Thchthaarheq leading the way, helped by Hraff’ Tumcoweiss, Grovan, and, in the innings of the tournament, Ystipug Contemnible.

Funvorgius Ventreltraxibung may go down in history twice. The man who led Gruenberg back to the T20 title after their flop in the 13th edition; and possibly the worst cricketer ever to win a world championship, as captain no less. Despite his quickfire 33 in the final (his highest score of the tournament) he finished with a strike rate under 100 for the tournament despite batting in the prime powerplay overs. Nurples Honk comes from a long line of Gruenberger feast-or-famine merchants; there were too few feasts this time. But with Hengtridan Jr. failing as an opener and Spakjutwazz Depraxinong unable to establish himself, Honk may keep his white ball role for the foreseeable future.

Contemnible’s awesome glovework sees his join the likes of Spintmhitz Turvuaednes and Kahunk Uvaevulavae; his whirlwind 79*, the team’s highest individual innings, puts him ahead of Vumtyhop Chuffles in the batting stakes too. Tumcoweiss had a fine tournament as batsman, bowler, and fielder; Grovan was expensive, but Ventreltraxibung plainly trusted no one else with final over duties. Quouodan Skejjibox was superb throughout and didn’t collect the wickets he deserved; they went instead to Jett Tyrkkekkekklukkekklukekk, who remains a mystery spinner in the sense of it’s a mystery whether he’s world beatingly good or unselectably bad. Renkauer bowled with a pace not seen since Azzawozzawoowizbitz Telliflikkiflarknon, though his impact dulled as the tournament went on.

The GCB have signalled their ambition to return to Test cricket. Such a team will look very different: there will be no Ventreltraxibung, for a start. Experienced players such as Compoundinterest Hmnnf and Plopples Hrrrg may return to fortify the batting. There may even come a time when Ke Ke is fit enough to bowl two consecutive balls without suffering a stress fracture. But on the basis of this tournament, the future is bright. And full of goats.