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[SUBMITTED] @@LEADER@@'s List

A place to spoil daily issues for those who haven't had them yet, snigger at typos, and discuss ideas for new ones.
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Baggieland
Senator
 
Posts: 3523
Founded: May 27, 2013
Compulsory Consumerist State

[SUBMITTED] @@LEADER@@'s List

Postby Baggieland » Thu Dec 03, 2020 6:53 pm

Here's the inspiration:
https://www.news.com.au/world/north-america/us-politics/biden-supporters-begin-drawing-up-revenge-lists-of-trump-allies/news-story/730f4ecaceae4a037d2c421193ad1320

[TITLE] @@LEADER@@'s List

[DESCRIPTION] Congratulations! You have just comfortably won the latest election and @@NAME@@ can look forward to more of your wisdom. However, there is still a sizeable amount of the population, who for some reason, still support the opposition.

[VALIDITY] has elections

[OPTION] "We need to find out who these sycophants are," declares Alex O'Connell, the newest, youngest and most impulsive of Parliamentarians. "We need to draw up a list of everyone who has ever supported the opposition, taken a pay-check from them or helped them further their agenda. We must make sure that these people never get the chance to serve in office, join a corporate board, find a faculty position or be accepted into polite society ever again."

[EFFECT] a whole new class of 'untermenschen' has been created

[OPTION] "There's no need for a witch-hunt," advises @@RANDOMNAME@@, a more senior politician who 'crossed the floor' some time ago. "Ostracising anyone who supported the opposition isn't healthy for our democracy – instead we should reach out to them. After every election have a 'get-together' and see if there are any of their policy ideas that we could implement."

[EFFECT] the only difference between @@LEADER@@'s party and the opposition is the colour of the rosettes

[OPTION] "Lists are good Dear," says your mum, who has just popped into the office to bring you tea and scones. "I always have lists for everything. I've got them for shopping, recipes, which pj's you should wear for each day of the week, and so on. If you mandate that every government department must provide lists for every little thing that they do – then your government will run so much more smoothly. Now, where did I put my list of things to do today?"

[EFFECT] government red-tape is listed as critical


[TITLE] @@LEADER@@'s List

[DESCRIPTION] Congratulations! You have just comfortably won the latest election and @@NAME@@ can look forward to more of your wisdom. However, there is still a sizeable amount of the population – who for some reason – still support the opposition.

[VALIDITY] has elections, no wild-child

[OPTION] "We need to find out who each and every one of these traitors are," declares Alex O'Connell, the newest, youngest and most impulsive of Parliamentarians. "Let's create a list of everyone who supported the opposition or helped them in any way to put out their vile anti-@@LEADER@@ agenda. Then all we need is a secret government department ensuring that anyone on the list… well let's just say that life – getting a decent job or sending their kids to a respectable school – will become somewhat problematic."

[EFFECT] a whole new class of 'untermenschen' has been created

[OPTION] "There's no need for a witch-hunt," advises @@RANDOMNAME@@, a more senior politician who 'crossed the floor' some time ago. "Ostracising anyone who supported the opposition isn't healthy for our democracy – we should be reaching out to them. After every election have a 'get-together' and let's make a list of any of their reasonable policy ideas that we could implement instead."

[EFFECT] the only difference between @@LEADER@@'s party and the opposition is the colour of the rosettes

[OPTION] "Lists are good Dear," says your mum, who has just popped into the office to bring you tea and scones. "I always have lists for everything. I've got them for shopping, recipes, which pj's you should wear for each day of the week, and so on. If you mandate that every government department must provide lists for every little thing that they do – then your government will run so much more smoothly. Now, where did I put my list of things to do today?"

[EFFECT] government red-tape is listed as critical


[TITLE] @@LEADER@@'s List

[DESCRIPTION] During the most recent election (which you won comfortably, of course) the opposition engaged in a fair amount of vitriol directed at you and your party. Some members of your organisation are now calling for those who participated in the abuse to be held accountable.

[VALIDITY] has elections, no wild-child

[OPTION] "We need to find out who each and every one of these degenerates are," declares Alex O'Connell, the newest, youngest and most impulsive of Parliamentarians. "Let's create a list of everyone who supported the opposition or helped them in any way to put out their vile anti-@@LEADER@@ agenda. Then all we need is a secret government department ensuring that anyone on the list, well let's just say that life – getting a decent job or sending their kids to a respectable school – will become somewhat problematic."

[EFFECT] a whole new class of 'untermenschen' has been created

[OPTION] "There's no need for a witch-hunt," advises @@RANDOMNAME@@, a more senior politician who 'crossed the floor' some time ago. "Ostracising people for colourfully voicing their opposition isn't healthy for our democracy – we should be reaching out to them. After every election have a 'get-together' and let's make a list of any of their reasonable policy ideas that we could implement instead."

[EFFECT] the only difference between @@LEADER@@'s party and the opposition is the colour of the rosettes

[OPTION] "Lists are good Dear," says your mum, who has just popped into the office to bring you tea and scones. "I always have lists for everything. I've got them for shopping, recipes, which pj's you should wear for each night of the week, and so on. If you mandate that every government department must provide lists for every little thing that they do – then your government will run so much more smoothly. Now, where did I put my list of things to do today?"

[EFFECT] government red-tape is listed as critical
Last edited by Baggieland on Tue Jan 12, 2021 1:53 am, edited 3 times in total.

User avatar
Fauxia
Senator
 
Posts: 4679
Founded: Dec 22, 2016
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Fauxia » Tue Dec 08, 2020 9:57 am

Is a direct quote of some WaPo neocon really necessary?

Direct quotes are fine sometimes, of course, but they should be for fairly well-known ones which are funny. This isn't particularly funny, you're just putting Jennifer Rubin's words directly into the mouth of the speaker in option 1.

Option 3 only seems tangentially related.

I'm not saying this is a bad topic, and forgive my bluntness, but at the moment it doesn't seem up to your usual standard. Probably, that comes to having Jennifer Rubin write it instead of Baggieland. No thanks, I prefer NS writers for NS.
Last edited by Fauxia on Tue Dec 08, 2020 10:00 am, edited 2 times in total.
Reploid Productions wrote:Unfortunately, Max still won't buy the mods elite ninja assassin squads to use, so... no such luck.
Sandaoguo wrote:GP is a den of cynics and nihilists

User avatar
Baggieland
Senator
 
Posts: 3523
Founded: May 27, 2013
Compulsory Consumerist State

Postby Baggieland » Wed Dec 09, 2020 2:31 am

Fauxia wrote:Is a direct quote of some WaPo neocon really necessary?

Direct quotes are fine sometimes, of course, but they should be for fairly well-known ones which are funny. This isn't particularly funny, you're just putting Jennifer Rubin's words directly into the mouth of the speaker in option 1.

Fauxia wrote:I'm not saying this is a bad topic, and forgive my bluntness, but at the moment it doesn't seem up to your usual standard. Probably, that comes to having Jennifer Rubin write it instead of Baggieland. No thanks, I prefer NS writers for NS.

Yeah, you caught me in a moment of sheer laziness there. It has been de-Jenniferised and it has become Baggiefied instead. :)

Fauxia wrote:Option 3 only seems tangentially related.

Hmm... I quite like option 3 as a standard crazy option. It talks of forcing government departments to make lists, so it seems related to me. Always open to suggestions of course.

2nd draft is up.

Option 1 has been Baggiefied.
Option 2 has a couple of tweaks to it, hopefully it reads better now.
Option 3 has no changes, at the moment. :)

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Australian rePublic
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 21890
Founded: Mar 18, 2013
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Australian rePublic » Wed Dec 09, 2020 12:51 pm

Well of coarse there are people who support the opposition. Unless it's a faux election, this is to be expected.
If you're against political parties who support the CCP, then vote against the Australian Labor Party
New Zealand's Prime Minister Jacinda Aardern is so deeply in love with human rights and Muslim lives that she's actively going out of her way to refuse to acknowledge China's persecution of Uyghurs. It's impossible to love human rights & Muslim lives more than that!
Until if and when the Spanish language evolves to allow for gender-neutrality to not be impossible, (which will take at least centuries), the concept of "LatinX" is completely ridiculous
From Greek Ansestry Orthodox Christian
18 Published Issues and 1 WA Resolution List of NPC Nations
In-Character posts made by this fictious account do not reflect the actions of any real world government

User avatar
Baggieland
Senator
 
Posts: 3523
Founded: May 27, 2013
Compulsory Consumerist State

Postby Baggieland » Wed Dec 09, 2020 9:32 pm

Australian rePublic wrote:Well of coarse there are people who support the opposition. Unless it's a faux election, this is to be expected.

Of course some people will always support different parties. It's not about who supports who, it's about creating a list to enact a witch-hunt.

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Terrabod
Spokesperson
 
Posts: 183
Founded: Jan 10, 2018
Corrupt Dictatorship

Postby Terrabod » Thu Dec 10, 2020 4:06 am

Baggieland wrote:Of course some people will always support different parties. It's not about who supports who, it's about creating a list to enact a witch-hunt.

It's just because your intro is a little bit saggy.

Baggieland wrote:[DESCRIPTION] Congratulations! You have just comfortably won the latest election and @@NAME@@ can look forward to more of your wisdom. However, there is still a sizeable amount of the population – who for some reason – still support the opposition.

This doesn't introduce the core problem discussed in the issue, it just tells us that a proportion of the population support the opposition after your win. As for the 'for some reason', we know the reason - because that's the party they wanted to win instead of you.

User avatar
Fauxia
Senator
 
Posts: 4679
Founded: Dec 22, 2016
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Fauxia » Thu Dec 10, 2020 8:51 pm

Much better. I do think that having the dashes and the ellipsis is a little confusing, though - is there any way you could tweak that?
Reploid Productions wrote:Unfortunately, Max still won't buy the mods elite ninja assassin squads to use, so... no such luck.
Sandaoguo wrote:GP is a den of cynics and nihilists

User avatar
Baggieland
Senator
 
Posts: 3523
Founded: May 27, 2013
Compulsory Consumerist State

Postby Baggieland » Thu Dec 10, 2020 9:07 pm

Terrabod wrote:It's just because your intro is a little bit saggy.

Terrabod wrote:This doesn't introduce the core problem discussed in the issue, it just tells us that a proportion of the population support the opposition after your win. As for the 'for some reason', we know the reason - because that's the party they wanted to win instead of you.

Done.
Fauxia wrote:Much better. I do think that having the dashes and the ellipsis is a little confusing, though - is there any way you could tweak that?

And done.

I've also tweaked options 1 and 2 a little bit, just to make them fit better to the new intro.

3rd draft is up.

User avatar
Baggieland
Senator
 
Posts: 3523
Founded: May 27, 2013
Compulsory Consumerist State

Postby Baggieland » Sun Jan 03, 2021 9:37 pm

Any more comments on this one?

User avatar
Fauxia
Senator
 
Posts: 4679
Founded: Dec 22, 2016
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Fauxia » Fri Jan 08, 2021 9:56 am

Looks good to me, Baggie.
Reploid Productions wrote:Unfortunately, Max still won't buy the mods elite ninja assassin squads to use, so... no such luck.
Sandaoguo wrote:GP is a den of cynics and nihilists

User avatar
Baggieland
Senator
 
Posts: 3523
Founded: May 27, 2013
Compulsory Consumerist State

Postby Baggieland » Tue Jan 12, 2021 1:54 am

Fauxia wrote:Looks good to me, Baggie.

Thanks Fauxia, and with that vote of confidence...

submitted.

User avatar
Lelscrep
Envoy
 
Posts: 234
Founded: Apr 11, 2015
Civil Rights Lovefest

Postby Lelscrep » Tue Jan 12, 2021 3:18 am

Baggieland wrote:
Fauxia wrote:Looks good to me, Baggie.

Thanks Fauxia, and with that vote of confidence...

submitted.

Well good luck! I quite like this issue. :)

User avatar
Baggieland
Senator
 
Posts: 3523
Founded: May 27, 2013
Compulsory Consumerist State

Postby Baggieland » Tue Jan 12, 2021 4:06 am

Lelscrep wrote:
Baggieland wrote:Thanks Fauxia, and with that vote of confidence...

submitted.

Well good luck! I quite like this issue. :)

:hug:

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Socialist States of Ludistan
Diplomat
 
Posts: 858
Founded: Apr 21, 2020
Civil Rights Lovefest

Postby Socialist States of Ludistan » Tue Jan 12, 2021 4:13 am

Seems like a good issue, can’t really say how to improve it, but I’m no professional issue-maker.
“Communism is the definition of failure.”
- Liberty Prime




Member of DEA and IDSF

User avatar
Australian rePublic
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 21890
Founded: Mar 18, 2013
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Australian rePublic » Fri Jan 29, 2021 8:30 pm

Good Luck!
If you're against political parties who support the CCP, then vote against the Australian Labor Party
New Zealand's Prime Minister Jacinda Aardern is so deeply in love with human rights and Muslim lives that she's actively going out of her way to refuse to acknowledge China's persecution of Uyghurs. It's impossible to love human rights & Muslim lives more than that!
Until if and when the Spanish language evolves to allow for gender-neutrality to not be impossible, (which will take at least centuries), the concept of "LatinX" is completely ridiculous
From Greek Ansestry Orthodox Christian
18 Published Issues and 1 WA Resolution List of NPC Nations
In-Character posts made by this fictious account do not reflect the actions of any real world government


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