PUBLISHED: Damn! We're up the creek!

[Australian rePublic]

[title] Damn! We're up the creek!

[desc] @@NAME@@'s longest, perennial warm water river, the Fanoob, is a major shipping lane for @@REGION@@. However, Ercula, a downstream nation, has unveiled its plans to dam the river, prohibiting any ships from travelling further upstream, beyond their waters. Having unsuccessfully tried to convince Ercula to not proceed with the project, you have called an emergency meeting in @@CAPITAL@@.
[validity] Must allow foreign trade, must allow cars and trucks

[option] "@@LEADER@@, our cities will be dead in the water," complains @@RANDOMNAME@@, the mayor of Potamopolis, a city on the banks of the Fanoob, "but we have an opportunity here. We can finally have those new railway lines to the oceanic port of @@ANIMAL@@ City, oh and upgrades to our highways, oh and new airports, oh, and a rolling highway. A rolling highway would be cool!"
[effect] the new dry ports next to navigable rivers has created a stereotype of aquaphobic @@DENONYMPLURAL@@

[option] "You think you have problems, what about us?" asks ambassador @@RANDOMNAME@@, from Thersti, an upstream landlocked country. "Our only access to the sea is through the Fanoob! The damned dam would mean cargo ships can't travel from our nation to the ocean, at all! What do you say we gather our armies, along with the other upstream countries, and blow Ercula out of the water!"
[option validity] must have a military

[effect] politely informing @@DENONYMADJECTIVE@@ civilian ships that they accidentally veered into another nation's waters is considered an act of war


[option] "You think you have problems, what about us?" asks ambassador @@RANDOMNAME@@, from Thersti, an upstream landlocked country. "Our only access to the sea is through the Fanoob! The damned dam would mean cargo ships can't travel from our nation to the ocean, at all! What do you say you rebuild your army, team up with us and the other upstream countries, and blow Ercula out of the water!"
[option validity] must not have a military

[effect] politely informing @@DENONYMADJECTIVE@@ civilian ships that they accidentally veered into another nation's waters is considered an act of war

[option] "Please don't cry a river," suggests @@RANDOMNAME@@, a civil engineer, whilst pulling out a map. "We can build a new canal connecting the Fanoob to the ocean." @@HE@@ draws on the map with a marker,."This could be the the route. The furthest of these inland towns is only 10 kilometres away from the proposed canal route, so if we give each of these towns a grant, they can expand out to the banks of the canal and become port cities! Sure, the route will be in the valley which is already prone to flooding, but nobody would dare upset us if we controlled the access from the Fanoob to the sea! It's win-win-win!"
[effect] the government is building expensive infrastructure in order to justify building even more expensive infrastructure

[title] Damn! We're up the creek!

[desc] @@NAME@@'s longest, perennial warm water river, the Fanoob, is a major shipping lane for @@REGION@@. However, Ercula, a downstream nation, has unveiled its plans to dam the river, prohibiting any ships from travelling further upstream, beyond their waters. Have unsuccessfully tried to convince Ercula to not proceed with the project, you have called an emergency meeting in @@CAPITAL@@.
[validity] Must allow foreign trade, must allow cars and trucks, must have a military

[option] "@@LEADER@@, our cities will be dead in the water," complains @@RANDOMNAME@@, the mayor of Potamopolis, a city on the banks of the Fanoob, "but we have an opportunity here, we can finally have those upgrades to the highways and rail lines we have been asking for! If we can't bring ships here, then we'll ship our goods to @@ANIMAL@@ City!"
[effect] the new rail line which runs next to a navigable river has created a stereotype of aquaphobic @@DENONYMPLURAL@@

[option] "You think you have problems, what about us?" asks ambassador @@RANDOMNAME@@, from Thersti, an upstream landlocked country, "Our only access to the sea is through the Fanoob! The damned dam would mean cargo ships can't travel from our nation to the ocean, at all! What do you say we gather our armies, along with the other upstream countries, and blow Ercula out of the water!"

[effect] politely informing @@DENONYMADJECTIVE@@ civilian ships that they accidentally veered into an other nation's waters is considered an act of war

[option] "Please don't cry a river," suggests @@RANDOMNAME@@, a civil engineer, whilst pulling out a map, "We can build a new canal connecting the Fanoob to the ocean! This would be the proposed route. The furthest of these inland towns is only 10 kilometres away from the proposed canal route, so if we give each of these towns a grant, they can expand out to the banks of the canal and become port cities! Also, no one would dare upset us if we controlled the access from the Fanoob to the sea! It's win-win-win!"
[effect] the government is building expensive infrastructure in order to justify building even more expensive infrastructure

[title] Damn! We're up the creek!

[desc] @@NAME@@'s longest, perennial warm water river, the Fanoob, is a major shipping lane for @@REGION@@. However, Ercula, a downstream nation, has unveiled its plans to dam the river, prohibiting any ships from travelling further upstream, beyond their waters. After speaking to the leader of Ercula, who refused to head your requests, and with only a year to act, you have called an emergency meeting in @@CAPITAL@@, with key members of @@NAME@@’s government, and foreign diplomats from neighbouring countries.
[validity] Must allow foreign trade, must allow cars and trucks, must have a military

[option] "@@LEADER@@, our cities will be dead in the water,
," complains @@RANDOMNAME@@, the mayor of Potamopolis, a city on the banks of the Fanoob, who is speaking on behalf of all @@DENONYMADJECTIVE@@ cities and towns on the river, "but we have an opportunity here, we can finally have those upgrades to the highways and rail lines we have been asking for! If our factories and farms can't trade with ships, then they can send their goods to the port of @@ANIMAL@@ City! On the plus side, e can also provide better access to passengers and motorists!"
[effect] the new rail line which runs next to a navigable river has created a stereotype of aquaphobic @@DENONYMPLURAL@@

[option] “You think you have problems, what about us?" asks ambassador @@RANDOMNAME@@, from Thersti, an upstream landlocked country, "Our only access to the sea is through the Fanoob! Damn Ercula! Well, actually, don't damn them. That would mean cargo ships can't travel from our nation to the ocean at all! What do you say we gather our armies, along with the other upstream countries, and blow Ercula out of the water!"

[effect] politely informing @@DENONYMADJECTIVE@@ civilian ships that they accidently veered into an other nation's waters is considered an act of war

[option] "Where you see a crisis, I see opportunity," suggests mayor @@RANDOMNAME@@, once again reminding you of the existence @@HIS@@ town, whilst the attending members of your cabenate roll their eyes, "For decades, we were always ignored when asking for new infrastructure. When we want new factories, we're too far from the rail line, and when we ask for a rail line, we're too far from factories. Finally, our town can have a river running through it, and end the vicious cycle! By which I mean build a canal linking the Fanoob to the sea." @@HE@@ pulls out a map," as you can see, my town is only 10 kilometres away from the closest direct, route between the Fanoob and the ocean, when you take mountains into consideration. And with @@NANE@@ controlling access between the Fanoob and the sea, no one would dare upset us! Just give my town a grant so we expand out to the canal, and there could be a new major port city!"
[effect] the government is building expensive infrastructure in order to justify building even more expensive infrastructure

[Baggieland]

Another good premise here Aussie. However, while I get what each speaker is proposing, it's all a bit long-winded. Fancy getting the scissors out and be a bit more to the point?

[Australian rePublic]

Another good premise here Aussie. However, while I get what each speaker is proposing, it's all a bit long-winded. Fancy getting the scissors out and be a bit more to the point?

The second draft is up! Thanks!

[Baggieland]

Looking much better Aussie.

[Trotterdam]

Have unsuccessfully tried to convince Ercula to not proceed with the project, you have called an emergency meeting in @@CAPITAL@@.

Should be "having".

[validity] Must allow foreign trade, must allow cars and trucks, must have a military

I'd delete the "must have a military" requirement and move it to option 2. (Maybe even with an alternate version for no-military nations, asking you to rebuild the military, or asking you to contribute funding to the allied militaries without sending soldiers of your own.)

[option] "@@LEADER@@, our cities will be dead in the water," complains @@RANDOMNAME@@, the mayor of Potamopolis, a city on the banks of the Fanoob, "but we have an opportunity here, we can finally have those upgrades to the highways and rail lines we have been asking for! If we can't bring ships here, then we'll ship our goods to @@ANIMAL@@ City!"
[effect] the new rail line which runs next to a navigable river has created a stereotype of aquaphobic @@DENONYMPLURAL@@

...Wait, where would these railways be going? If the point is that the river is passing through another nation, and you want to avoid being at the mercy of that nation, then obviously you'd need to find a different route to the sea, not just build the railway right next to the river.

[Chan Island]

Very nice issue, but option 1 feels a bit... underwhelming. In my opinion, you should have the speaker ask for an enormous overhaul: rails, yes, but also roads, airports and ideally something esoteric too. Couple that with some kind of a renegotiation of trade with the other country to get it really clinched.

[Drayxaso]

I really like the premise, but, as it stands now, I think most people would just instantly choose option 3. Unlike the previous 2 options, the option has no obvious downsides, and even though it implies a truly monumental scale of construction, that's just Tuesday for NS. The only clear disadvantage is that it would probably increase tax rates and government spending, but practically every single decision in NS does that, so NS players have a culture of just ignoring tax increases. I don't know what you should have as a downside, though. You could probably take a lesson from NS's earliest issues and just say that it'll divert funding from other areas, but it might be a better idea to chose something more unique. Maybe the new canals could somehow make the area more susceptible to flooding? Perhaps, in order to build the canals, habitats need to be destroyed? I don't know.

[Australian rePublic]

Third Draft is up

Looking much better Aussie.

Thanks!

Have unsuccessfully tried to convince Ercula to not proceed with the project, you have called an emergency meeting in @@CAPITAL@@.

Should be "having".

Fixed. Thanks!

[validity] Must allow foreign trade, must allow cars and trucks, must have a military

I'd delete the "must have a military" requirement and move it to option 2. (Maybe even with an alternate version for no-military nations, asking you to rebuild the military, or asking you to contribute funding to the allied militarises without sending soldiers of your own.)

Excellent idea. Implemented. Thanks!

[option] "@@LEADER@@, our cities will be dead in the water," complains @@RANDOMNAME@@, the mayor of Potamopolis, a city on the banks of the Fanoob, "but we have an opportunity here, we can finally have those upgrades to the highways and rail lines we have been asking for! If we can't bring ships here, then we'll ship our goods to @@ANIMAL@@ City!"
[effect] the new rail line which runs next to a navigable river has created a stereotype of aquaphobic @@DENONYMPLURAL@@

...Wait, where would these railways be going? If the point is that the river is passing through another nation, and you want to avoid being at the mercy of that nation, then obviously you'd need to find a different route to the sea, not just build the railway right next to the river.

Thanks!

Thanks for your help!

I really like the premise, but, as it stands now, I think most people would just instantly choose option 3. Unlike the previous 2 options, the option has no obvious downsides, and even though it implies a truly monumental scale of construction, that's just Tuesday for NS. The only clear disadvantage is that it would probably increase tax rates and government spending, but practically every single decision in NS does that, so NS players have a culture of just ignoring tax increases. I don't know what you should have as a downside, though. You could probably take a lesson from NS's earliest issues and just say that it'll divert funding from other areas, but it might be a better idea to chose something more unique. Maybe the new canals could somehow make the area more susceptible to flooding? Perhaps, in order to build the canals, habitats need to be destroyed? I don't know.

Fixed. Thanks for your help!

[Australian rePublic]

Bump

[Sacara]

[desc] @@NAME@@'s longest, perennial warm water river, the Fanoob, is a major shipping lane for @@REGION@@. However, Ercula, a downstream nation, has unveiled its plans to dam the river, prohibiting any ships from travelling further upstream, beyond their waters. Having unsuccessfully tried to convince Ercula to not proceed with the project, you have called an emergency meeting in @@CAPITAL@@.

I like the premise of this issue. Unique and fun.

[option] "@@LEADER@@, our cities will be dead in the water," complains @@RANDOMNAME@@, the mayor of Potamopolis, a city on the banks of the Fanoob, "but we have an opportunity here, we can finally have those new railway lines to the oceanic port of @@ANIMAL@@ City, oh and upgrades to our highways, oh and new airports, oh, and a rolling highway. A rolling highway would be coll!"

The comma in red needs to be changed to either a semicolon or just a new sentence. I also assume you mean cool in the last word of the option?

[option] "You think you have problems, what about us?" asks ambassador @@RANDOMNAME@@, from Thersti, an upstream landlocked country, "Our only access to the sea is through the Fanoob! The damned dam would mean cargo ships can't travel from our nation to the ocean, at all! What do you say we gather our armies, along with the other upstream countries, and blow Ercula out of the water!"

The comma after country should probably be a period. I also love the nation name. (Apply the same to option 3)

[effect] politely informing @@DENONYMADJECTIVE@@ civilian ships that they accidentally veered into an other nation's waters is considered an act of war

another*

[option] "Please don't cry a river," suggests @@RANDOMNAME@@, a civil engineer, whilst pulling out a map, "We can build a new canal connecting the Fanoob to the ocean! This would be the proposed route. The furthest of these inland towns is only 10 kilometres away from the proposed canal route, so if we give each of these towns a grant, they can expand out to the banks of the canal and become port cities! Sure, the route will be in the valley which is already prone to flooding, but nobody would dare upset us if we controlled the access from the Fanoob to the sea! It's win-win-win!"

The comma after map should probably be a period, again. The sentence I highlighted is one that I do not get; is it supposed to mean the route is in the sentence directly after it? It has no flow really.

[effect] the government is building expensive infrastructure in order to justify building even more expensive infrastructure

Great line!

Overall, I like this issue, but there are just a few grammatical errors.

[Australian rePublic]

Last call before submission
EDITED. Since it was mostly a few grammatical changes, I didn't bother with a new draft

[desc] @@NAME@@'s longest, perennial warm water river, the Fanoob, is a major shipping lane for @@REGION@@. However, Ercula, a downstream nation, has unveiled its plans to dam the river, prohibiting any ships from travelling further upstream, beyond their waters. Having unsuccessfully tried to convince Ercula to not proceed with the project, you have called an emergency meeting in @@CAPITAL@@.

I like the premise of this issue. Unique and fun.

[option] "@@LEADER@@, our cities will be dead in the water," complains @@RANDOMNAME@@, the mayor of Potamopolis, a city on the banks of the Fanoob, "but we have an opportunity here, we can finally have those new railway lines to the oceanic port of @@ANIMAL@@ City, oh and upgrades to our highways, oh and new airports, oh, and a rolling highway. A rolling highway would be coll!"

The comma in red needs to be changed to either a semicolon or just a new sentence. I also assume you mean cool in the last word of the option?

[option] "You think you have problems, what about us?" asks ambassador @@RANDOMNAME@@, from Thersti, an upstream landlocked country, "Our only access to the sea is through the Fanoob! The damned dam would mean cargo ships can't travel from our nation to the ocean, at all! What do you say we gather our armies, along with the other upstream countries, and blow Ercula out of the water!"

The comma after country should probably be a period. I also love the nation name. (Apply the same to option 3)

[effect] politely informing @@DENONYMADJECTIVE@@ civilian ships that they accidentally veered into an other nation's waters is considered an act of war

another*

Fixed, thanks!

[option] "Please don't cry a river," suggests @@RANDOMNAME@@, a civil engineer, whilst pulling out a map, "We can build a new canal connecting the Fanoob to the ocean! This would be the proposed route. The furthest of these inland towns is only 10 kilometres away from the proposed canal route, so if we give each of these towns a grant, they can expand out to the banks of the canal and become port cities! Sure, the route will be in the valley which is already prone to flooding, but nobody would dare upset us if we controlled the access from the Fanoob to the sea! It's win-win-win!"

The comma after map should probably be a period, again. The sentence I highlighted is one that I do not get; is it supposed to mean the route is in the sentence directly after it? It has no flow really.

Thanks. I re-worded it, hopefully it makes more sense now

[effect] the government is building expensive infrastructure in order to justify building even more expensive infrastructure

Great line!

Overall, I like this issue, but there are just a few grammatical errors.

Fixed, thanks!

[Jutsa]

@@HE@@ draws on the map with a marker,

Period at the end.
Also the final option's just a little bit long, but if you can't shorten it, that's OK.

Mostly just wanted to drop by and say that this is a pretty nice draft.
Nice to see two new proposed nations and a city. Love Thersti.

[Australian rePublic]

SUBMITTED
[qote="Jutsa";p="33831296"]

@@HE@@ draws on the map with a marker,

Period at the end.
[/quote]
Thanks!

Also the final option's just a little bit long, but if you can't shorten it, that's OK.

I don't think I can...

Mostly just wanted to drop by and say that this is a pretty nice draft.
Nice to see two new proposed nations and a city. Love Thersti.

Thanks

[Jutsa]

Good luck, Aussie.

[Australian rePublic]

Good luck, Aussie.

Thanks!

[Australian rePublic]

Issue 1071. Thanks to The Marsupial Illuminati for the Publish!

[Sacara]

PUBLISHED*. And congrats.

[Australian rePublic]

PUBLISHED*. And congrats.

Thanks

[Jutsa]

Congratulations, Aussie.

[Australian rePublic]

Congratulations, Aussie.

Thanks!