AVBF Rugby 7's VII Everything Thread

by **Nova Anglicana** » Thu Oct 21, 2021 5:51 pm

Confederacy Park Exhibition Pitch D, Burgunden, Neu Engollon

Matt Carlson deked the final Arjunnagar defender and dove across the try line, grounding the ball in an impeccable belly flop, if he did say so himself. As the referee's whistle blew to signal the try and the scoreboard flashed Nova Anglicana 33-14 Arjunnagar, Buddy Crist and Tom Townsend rushed in and engaged in a big group hug. "First fookin' try for Nova Anglicana, b'y!" Crist's voice boomed out across the pitch as the Nova Anglican fans roared their heads off and the neutrals clapped lustily. Carlson smiled a huge grin. Sure, it was at the end of the game against a winless minnow like Arjunnagar, but it felt good scoring his first international try.

The Arjunnagar guys were pretty big and mostly older, which made Carlson nervous at first. They looked like the kind of guys that wouldn't hesitate to get in some cheap shots in the scrum if they were playing fifteens. Or the kinds of guys that could put a hurt on you in the open field, if they managed to lay a hand on you, that is. But they looked pretty tired and smelled like they'd been drinking earlier. If that was the case, they might have been drinking themselves into a stupor since yesterday, seeing as their previous three games were all losses, two of them by at least 28 points. Even Sevendia had managed to handle them by sixteen, and they were all so ridiculously tall that it was a wonder they managed to be competent at sevens at all. The subs had bragged that they were going to do Arjunnagar like the starters had done Natanians and Nosts, score seven tries and pitch a shutout. It didn't quite turn out that way, but it was 21-7 at the half and now they were about to go up by twenty-one.

He accepted the tee from Jean Tremblay, carefully placed the ball on the tee, and booted it straight through the uprights. 35-14. It felt pretty good, especially since Denís Ferrer had promised the subs that a win by three tries or more would mean the subs got to start again against Sevendia later that day. With any luck, he'd make it two tries on the day - that would be something to call his parents about.

by **Lathamford** » Thu Oct 21, 2021 6:20 pm

Kingcross State University (KSU) through the Faculty of Sports and Recreation Science (FSR) today signed a memorandum of understanding (MoU) with the Lathamford Rugby Union (LRU) to strengthen the cooperation between the academic institution and the national rugby governing body.

The MoU was signed by KSU Vice-Chancellor Prof Emeritus, James Edward, and LRU President, Ercien Footbear, witnessed by FSR Dean Assoc Prof Dr. Lee Fedley and LRU Deputy President Owen Bishops.

“The cooperation between KSU and LRU has been established for almost five years in the form of the expertise of FSR lecturers in the development and preparation of national rugby athletes as well as the involvement of FSR students who play with the national rugby squad.

"We hope that with the signing of the MoU today, cooperation can be expanded, especially in strengthening and empowering national rugby," said Prof. Edward in the council's press conference at the KSU Chancellery Building in Kingcross, today.

The MoU signed will focus on six main areas namely the exchange of sports science information, exercise as well as the management of sports organizations; opportunities for cooperation related to activities, research, and projects that are mutually beneficial; as well as organizing courses and meetings related to sports science.

In addition, the MoU also focuses on creating an understanding of entrepreneurial relations; providing industrial training space for FSR students and staff at LRU, and cooperating in potential areas agreed upon from time to time.

In the meantime, Footbear said the ability and expertise possessed by FSR KSU will make the collaboration a success.

"We see KSU has a very strong sports science faculty, we are confident and believe that this collaboration will bring a win-win situation for both parties," he explained.

The collaboration between KSU and LRU has been established previously through FSR which offers experts in sports science to the national rugby elite team as well as a more flexible teaching plan to the national rugby athletes.

by **Copper Cuprum** » Fri Oct 22, 2021 12:41 am

DISCLAIMER: Gaelic Gamers is an independent sports blogging website created by four cousins with a common liking and passion for sports of all kinds and is in no way or form affiliated with or organized by any official news organization in the Democratic Republic of Abanhfleft. All statements and opinions posted here are our own and not anyone else's.

Gaelic Gamers
Presents...

The Rugby Rundown (Sevens Edition!)
with Graham O'Doherty

7TH AVBF SEVENS: DAY TWO, COPPER CUPRUM MATCH FOUR
Hello guys, and welcome back to another edition of The Rugby Rundown Sevens Edition with me, your gay Irishman Graham O'Doherty. Yes, my lovelies, I'm back with yet more coverage of the exploits of the national rugby sevens team of the Chiefdom of Copper Cuprum alongside my regular coverage of the Abanhfleft rugby sevens team here at the 7th AVBF Sevens. This morning the Copperites are up against the national sevens team of Baker Park. This seems like a good time to also mention that my good friends Zane Anthony and Ricky Gillingham from Lots of Ruck were there to watch along with me, and that I might be making an appearance with them once again explaining the history behind the Copperite chicken ritual. Keep your eyes and ears peeled for that one, ladies and gents.

Speaking of the chicken ritual, it's finally nice of Chief Deg to make a final choice on whether the ritual should still be performed or not. Copper Cuprum had become sort of an international pariah due to the "barbarism" of the chicken ritual, and lots of animal rights groups had called for the boycott of all Copperite meat and animal products due to the perceived "animal abuse" committed by the locals. In rugby, this had come to a head a fair few times. The Union of Socialist Alpine Republics once called for a boycott of all Copperite products. An animal rights activist in Darmen once got his head smashed in, literally, by the team shaman when he tried to save the poor chicken from having its blood spread all over the field. And, most recently, the Lisanderan captain got sent off for ordering his team to turn their backs to the ritual, and another Iris went into the bin for arguing about their captain's marching orders. It's fair to say that people are split on the whole issue, with some arguing that the ritual should be kept as is because it was literally a part of Copperite culture, while others argued that the Chiefdom should at least think about updating the ritual for modern sensibilities, and the obnoxious loudmouths on twii.tur with nothing else to do with their lives want nothing except the total and utter cancellation of Copper Cuprum. Which is why Chief Deg had finally decided the issue himself by way of a royal proclamation: the chicken ritual would now only be performed inside Copper Cuprum itself. Any time that a Copperite rugby or football team plays outside of their borders, the shaman and the team would perform a version of the ritual where instead of an actual live chicken, a rubber chicken would be decapitated. No blood would be involved in the away game version of the ritual, but the players will act as if there were when thet toss the head of the rubber chicken between themselves.

Which is all well and good, both for the Copperites and everyone else. Foreign networks can finally show the ritual in its full glory without blurring out any of the blood and gore from the dead chicken. Not sure how they're going to explain away the decapitation of a rubber chicken to children or those with queasy stomachs, but that's their problem, not mine. And so far, the new ritual seems to have worked out well for the Copperites. Before the start of the second day of the tournament, Copper Cuprum had a pretty decent 3-0-0 record, meaning their goddess of battle and sports was appeased with the rubber chickens for the moment. But as we were about to witness, someone was going to do something to make their goddess frown upon them. That's why you don't try to mess with rituals without the proper guidance and consent, my lovelies! Even when you don't really believe in that kind of stuff, events like these should really make you stop and think about the consequences of messing around with a supposedly omnipotent being.

So there I was, watching BP versus CC with the lads from Lots of Ruck. They, being from the Commonwealth, supported Baker Park, of course. Ostensibly, I was a neutral viewer, but due to the alliance Abanhfleft has with Copper Cuprum via the APOC Coalition, I felt compelled to support the Chiefdom in this one. And so we watched as the respective squads trooped out onto the field, and we stood up for both national anthems, and then we sat down in anticipation of the Copperite chicken ritual. The team shaman held up the rubber chicken by the neck, and then he chanted the necessary incantations calling for their goddess of battle to notice and accept their offering to her and thus bless them with victory. The shaman then took out the ceremonial sacrificial blade and pressed it to the rubber chicken's neck, and the players started chanting alongside the shaman's prayers, building up to the inevitable finale. However, when the shaman finally slashed the throat of the rubber chicken and cut it off, something spilled out of the rubber chicken. Obviously that wasn't supposed to happen because the shaman stopped his chanting immediately. At least it wasn't blood, chicken or otherwise, because that would have been enough to cause an international incident. But it turned out that one of the Copperite lads, one of the half-Copperites like Noel Berry or Rex Barber, must have thought that it would be a good idea to put some beer inside the rubber chicken to make it look like a traditional Copperite chicken ritual. It was one of those things that sound good when you come up with it but once you actually execute the plan, it looks just as stupid as it sounded. The shaman tried to go on as if nothing had happened, but you can see that he was just barely managing to hold in his anger. The man was absolutely shaking! He looked like he wanted to smash his ceremonial club into someone's head, just like his old man did way back in the day in Darmen. Someone had made a mockery out of a ritual that he considered very important, and he didn't like it one bit.

You know who else didn't like that? The Copperite goddess of battle, apparently. She didn't appreciate someone making a mockery of a ritual in her honor that she decided to strike down the Copperite team in the field of battle. The rugby sevens field of battle, mind, but a battlefield nonetheless. At least that's how the Copperites see it. Baker Park had the Copperites on the ropes right at the start, handing a quick one-two strike of two converted tries before the men from the Chiefdom finally managed to land a try of their own near the end of the first half. But Baker Park wasn't finished with them just yet, and the pain and hurt continued up to the end of the second half. Hiram Massoudoglu, for his part, couldn't make the score look a little bit better for his team, which was probably just how the Copperite goddess of battle wanted it.

Well, now. This Rugby Rundown went on a little bit longer than usual. But there was just a lot of stuff that I had to put in this one because this is where it makes the most sense in context. But that should do it for now. I'll be back to cover Copper Cuprum's last match alongside Abanhfleft's last match in the pool stage as always, so this is where I will leave all of you lovelies. And while you're waiting, why don't you drop the folks at the Blog of the Crazy Nomad a visit? Tell them good old Graham O'Doherty sent you. Us bloggers and podcasters have to stick together and help each other out, you know? XOXO from Graham….

Copper Cuprum (10)
Try: Heyedy 7' m
Kasugna 10' m
Con: Massoudoglu (0/2)

Baker Park (28)
Try: Dixon 1' c
Fields 3' c
Odekume 9' c
Seifferth 12' c
Con: (4/4)

by **Jumnia** » Fri Oct 22, 2021 4:20 am

The Jumnian Chronicles
Special Section: Seventh Annual AVBF Rugby Sevens Tournament

The "Sky Ravens" bounces back in style

Jumnia 33-7Juvencus

The debuting Jumnian National Rugby Sevens team, nicknamed the 'Sky Ravens' has regained momentum, bouncing back in style during their pool game victory.

The 'Sky Ravens' commenced their international career within the Seventh Annual AVBF Rugby Sevens Tournament, by losing against the second highest ranked international team of Lisander yesterday morning, yet managed to regain composure by defeating The Jovannic in their second match. However, this budding momentum was halted with great efficiency against the squad of the Chiefdom of Copper Cuprum. Luckily the evening break seemed to be a good thing, allowing the squad to rest and regroup, leading to a beautiful comeback.

The opposing squad managed to maintain possession after a Jumnian kick-off for quite some time, attempting to run at the defence, attempting to either crush through the squad, or force a line break due to a developing overlap. This was a costly mistake, as the physical, brutal almost, Jumnian defence continued to push the offense back in bone-crunching fashion, leading to three substitutions in the first three minutes due to injuries sustained.

In the fourth minute the morale of the opposition was crushed, allowing the Jumnian "Beast", Trygve Naess to smash through a very unwilling defensive line, for a conversion by Åse Thomassen.

A minute later Maja Leonardsen danced through two defenders, side stepping into a converted try with ease.

The first half ended just as the opposition managed to strike back, slotting home a converted try, ending the score with a final score of 14-7.

The Jumnians came back to the second half looking enraged with passion, which did not bode well for their opponents, which led to a high octane half, filled with a hatrick from Terézia Bakke two of which were converted.

The national squad of Juvencus seemed visibly relieved when the final whistle sounded off, after a painful, dominating match.

Match 4 Overview

Jumnia vs The Jovannic

Final Score: Jumnia 33 - Juvencus 07

Score Breakdown:
Jumnia:

Tries:

#1 Trygve Naess x 1
#6 Maja Leonardsen x 1
#7 Terézia Bakke x 3

Conversions:

#5 Åse Thomassen (4/5)

Juvencus:

Tries:

[Redacted] x 1

Conversions:

[Redacted]: (1/1)

Venue Played:

Confederacy Park Exhibition Pitch B

From our Analyst:

The Sky Ravens managed to regroup after their last poor performance yesterday afternoon, and they displayed the full spectrum of their abilities. They were extremely physical and offensive. That is what we want to see!

Match 5 Preview

Jumnia vs Baker Park

Venue: Confederacy Park Exhibition Pitch B

Brief Summary:

Jumnia will face off against Baker Park next - the 14th highest ranked team in the world, as part of the fifth match of the group stages. This team has had an impressive opening day, winning three of their four matches, managing to grab the pool's top position at day's end.

World Cup 81/82/83/84

Rick Gillingham: "Here we are at lunch break on day 2 of the AVBF Sevens. I'm Ricky G, Zane Anthony alongside as we bring you a special update edition of Lots of Ruck"

Zane Anthony: "I thought we were going to wait for Graham before we started?"
RG: "I'm just so hyped. He'll be along before we finish. Of course we're talking about Graham O'Doherty from The Rugby Rundown, which is probably the most listened-to rugby podcast in the multiverse."

ZA: 'Yeah, he was telling about his average listenership and I [censored] about 3 inches."
RG: "Graham wanted to get an early start on the beer tasting, and of course we always follow the guideline 'no dark liquor before noon', so we had the palest of pale ales I've ever seen while the three of us took in Baker Park up against number five ranked Copper Cuprum."

ZA: "We mentioned on the earlier episode that the Copperites kicked us good and proper at the Sevens World Cup, and Graham explained the importance & symbolism of their chicken sacrifice pre-match ritual..."

RG: "I'm glad he did so before any of us got too drunk, otherwise I'd never have understood it."
ZA: "I'm not 100% sure you understood it anyway, but that's beside the point. Anyway, the BlueGrays came to show how far they've come since that last meeting. Although Lisander snapped our 10 match unbeaten run in the previous pool match yesterday, the boys looked up for it from the start. A pair of converted tries on each side of halftime saw BP come away with a 28-10 win. Maybe one of the biggest victories in the side's history."

RG: "It's going to take a lot ifs, ands, and buts to keep us out of the Cup competition regardless of what happens against Jumnia. The AORC was big but a really good result here would be 'BIG' with a capital B."

ZA: We also had a chance to meet up with another rugby nutter today thanks to Graham. Riley Heglion is from Port Ember and writes the 'Blog of The Crazy Nomad', although she doesn't seem any crazier than us..."
RG: "We're not nomads, though"

ZA: "Point conceded. It does seem as though we'll be having an Uptown Saturday Night in Neu Engellon after the rugby is finished, if we hang with Graham and Riley. So, for now I'm Zane Anthony..."
RG: "I'm Rick Gillingham thanks for tuning into Lots of Ruck!"

by **Neu Engollon** » Fri Oct 22, 2021 10:05 pm

Seventh Annual AVBF Sevens Tournament (2021 Edition)
Second Day Afternoon Matches (MD5)

CONFEDERACY PARK, BURGUNDEN
RUGBY EXHIBITION PITCHES

GROUP A
San Ortelio 12–26 Port Ember
Licentian Isles 10–24 Neu Engollon
Sixty-Nine X 0–40 Abanhfleft

                        Pld    W   D   L    PF   PA   PD   Pts 
1 Abanhfleft            5    4   1   0   154   48 +106    14
2 Port Ember            5    4   1   0   144   64  +80    14
3 Neu Engollon          5    3   0   2   117   84  +33    11
4 San Ortelio           5    2   0   3   123   90  +33     9
5 Licentian Isles       5    1   0   4    69  156  −87     7
6 Sixty-Nine X          5    0   0   5    33  198 −165     5


GROUP B
Baker Park 17–19 Jumnia
The Jovannic 0–41 Copper Cuprum
Juvencus 12–40 Lisander

                        Pld    W   D   L    PF   PA   PD   Pts 
1 Copper Cuprum         5    4   0   1   144   60  +84    13
2 Lisander              5    4   0   1   139   65  +74    13
3 Baker Park            5    3   0   2   146   62  +84    11
4 Jumnia                5    3   0   2   107   80  +27    11
5 Juvencus              5    1   0   4    43  167 −124     7
6 The Jovannic          5    0   0   5    29  174 −145     5

GROUP C
HUElavia 26–12 StrayaRoos
Lathamford 14–26 Kriegiersien
Britonisea 5–40 Elejamie

                        Pld    W   D   L    PF   PA   PD   Pts 
1 Elejamie              5    5   0   0   164   29 +135    15
2 Kriegiersien          5    4   0   1   130   62  +68    13
3 Lathamford            5    3   0   2   122   90  +32    11
4 HUElavia              5    2   0   3    90  103  −13     9
5 StrayaRoos            5    1   0   4    93  107  −14     7
6 Britonisea            5    0   0   5     5  213 −208     5

GROUP D
Natanians and Nosts 0–42 Brookstation
Arjunnagar 0–38 TJUN-ia
Sevendia 5–33 Nova Anglicana

                            Pld    W   D   L    PF   PA   PD   Pts 
1 Nova Anglicana            5    5   0   0   187   40 +147    15
2 TJUN-ia                   5    4   0   1   147   71  +76    13
3 Brookstation              5    3   0   2   119   96  +23    11
4 Natanians and Nosts       5    2   0   3    85  122  −37     9
5 Sevendia                  5    1   0   4    66  130  −64     7
6 Arjunnagar                5    0   0   5    33  178 −145     5

Quarterfinal Brackets

Cup
# 1 Nova Anglicana v # 8 Kriegiersien
# 2 Elejamie v # 7 Lisander
# 3 Abanhfleft v # 6 TJUN-ia
# 4 Copper Cuprum v # 5 Port Ember

Plate
# 1 Baker Park v # 8 Natanians and Nosts
# 2 Neu Engollon v # 7 HUElavia
# 3 San Ortelio v # 6 Brookstation
# 4 Lathamford v # 5 Jumnia

Bowl
# 1 StrayaRoos v # 8 Britonisea
# 2 Sevendia v # 7 The Jovannic
# 3 Licentian Isles v # 6 Juvencus
# 4 Arjunnagar v # 5 Sixty-Nine X

works? · by **Abanhfleft** » Sat Oct 23, 2021 8:49 am

DISCLAIMER: Gaelic Gamers is an independent sports blogging website created by four cousins with a common liking and passion for sports of all kinds and is in no way or form affiliated with or organized by any official news organization in the Democratic Republic of Abanhfleft. All statements and opinions posted here are our own and not anyone else's.

Gaelic Gamers
Presents...

The Rugby Rundown (Sevens Edition!)
with Graham O'Doherty

7TH AVBF SEVENS: DAY TWO, MATCH FIVE
Hello guys, and welcome back to another edition of The Rugby Rundown Sevens Edition with me, your gay Irishman Graham O'Doherty. Good news to report all around, as Abanhfleft have managed to book passage to the Cup quarterfinals of the AVBF Sevens once again. It was probably the easiest way we could have qualified into the quarters in order to defend the Maracalo Cup as the team we faced, Sixty-Nine X, had a very… eclectic squad, and one that has basically mentally already flown back to their home country from Burgunden. They couldn't physically fly back to their country just yet because there's still the Plate to play for for them, but since they were basically consigned to the bottom of the group they didn't see any point bothering to turn up against us. And part of me wishes that they did turn up so they can keep our Revolutionaries on our toes instead of just letting us walk over them. This isn't the kind of game the lads need before the quarterfinals. They might fall into the trap of thinking all teams play like Sixty-Nine X. I just don't want us to embarrass ourselves by falling flat on our faces once again.

The lads might as well be hosting a training session with the Sixty-Nine X players as dummies because those guys just plain did not care. They just watched our boys in blue, orange, and green pass by them and land tries left and right. If this game was full-on rugby union then we might have been on hand to witness an historic score. That being said, we did quite a lot of damage in just fourteen minutes. The lads could have been talked into not running up the score, but seeing how pathetically their opponents were "defending" them, you could understand why they weren't interested in that. They want to make a big show out of it: this is what happens when you don't defend against us! If you think about it, we scored six tries in fourteen minutes of gameplay. Against literally anyone else, scoring six tries is a veritable achievement. But Sixty-Nine X's pitiful performance made this feat look positively pedestrian. Seriously! How in the world did this team manage to qualify for the AVBF Sevens? I mean, sure, it's not the Rugby Sevens World Cup, but surely you would expect the AVBF Sevens to have a qualification process just as stringent as the one for the Sevens World Cup! It's nations like Sixty-Nine X which make sevens a mockery among other sports!

Sorry for going on a bit of a rant there. I just got so triggered by those Sixty-Nine X players not even bothering to play the game properly! The Revolutionaries are going to celebrate this victory, their first shutout of an opponent in this AVBF Sevens, as they have every right to do so. But I'm just worried that this is setting us up for failure at a later date. We can't expect every single team we're going to play in the future to play just like this disgraceful excuse of a "team" from Sixty-Nine X. A bloody under-15 union team would have put up a much better fight than Sixty-Nine X did! Sure, a 40-0 scoreline looks good in isolation, but when that result is followed up by a massive clanger, it's all but embarrassing! No, it is embarrassing! And I do hope that it doesn't end up happening. I don't want to have to eat my words in front of the likes of Zane Anthony and Riley Heglion and all the others. And I want to see Abanhfleft defend the Maracalo Cup. Is that too much for one man to ask? XOXO from Graham….

Sixty-Nine X (0)
Try: N/A
Con: N/A

Abanhfleft (40)
Try: Rakitic 1' c, 5' m
Votaw 3' c, 11' c
Greathouse 6' c
Schmoll 12' c
Con: Reid (5/6)

by **Port Ember** » Sat Oct 23, 2021 10:15 am

Blog of The Crazy Nomad

Blog Series: Seventh Annual AVBF Rugby Sevens Tournament.

♡ Part 1
♡ Part 2
♡ Part 3
♡ Part 4
♡ Part 5
♡ Part 6 (You are here)

Greetings my lovies!

Welcome back to my blog, for the Seventh Annual AVBF Rugby Sevens Tournament Blog Series, where I am authoring my experiences during my visit to the Alpen View Brew Festival, and the accompanying AVBF Rugby Sevens Tournament, hosted within the beautiful Confederacy of Neu Engollon. This is my sixth article about my experience here, please check out the first five parts above first if you missed it!

After I finished writing Part 5 of my adventures (which of course detailed the story of how I somehow overcame the odds by surviving two days of non stop drinking, the smashing victory of our National Sevens Rugby squad over Sixty-Nine X, and the realisation that we qualified for the Cup contest Quarterfinals), I continued to fight the good fight - in other words, the party continued!

After joining the large crowd of Port Emberian supporters in song, cheer and dance in the immediate aftermath of our victory, I eventually broke off to join up with my fellow podcaster/bloggers, Graham O'Doherty from the blog 'Gaelic Gamers' and Zane Anthony & Rick Gillingham from the podcasting show 'Lots of Ruck', spectating the Baker Park / Copper Cuprum match up. It was a very intense, entertaining & hard fought match, but the absolute highlight was the pre match ceremony… I finally had the honor of witnessing the infamous ceremonial (rubber) chicken slaughter first hand, and my first time doing so, happened to be one of the most exciting and controversial ones yet, as one of the Copperite players decided to play a prank beforehand, by filling the rubber chick with beer, thus when it lost it's head - the crowd lost their minds! (Haha).

This caused a stir of epic proportions naturally, with a wide mix of emotions erupting from the crowd, ranging from crying, shocked gasps and cheer. The master of the ceremony, a shaman no less, had to fight the devil inside him to not show his true emotional upheaval bubbling inside, whilst most players on the turf had to fight equally hard to hide any emotion. Fucking priceless..

I was cheering at the top of my lungs of course, as this was in my opinion, one of the most exciting occurrences in rugby history. One day when I am a mum, I will tell my whippersnappers of this glorious day.

I eventually broke off after the match, in order to sample
the remainder of the festival's offerings. Allow me the pleasure to inform you that Graham, Zane & Rick are all stand-up guys, even better people than they are independent journalists. As good as they get. I said my farewells temporarily, because as you might recall, I challenged myself to visit the tent of every major international brewer/vendor before festival's end, and this finally brought me to the Martell's Pillsen tent, hailing all the way from Lisander.

These guys had only one beer variety on offer, which is the iconic (so i hear), and namesake, Martell Pillsen. This red bottled beer, with a coat of arms bearing double hammers, was honestly not the best of beers which I have sampled at this festival. It is, in fact, a cheap beer. A beer for the everyday Jack & Jill who wishes to quench their thirst, without being hammered (see what I did there

) into submission, all without breaking the purse.

Believe it or not, but this was exactly the beer which I needed at that very moment, as I was properly bruised after two and a half days of non stop binge-drinking, yet I carried the burden of an intense, nearly unquenchable thirst. Martell came to the rescue just in time!

The soft, easy to swallow beverage quenched my thirst properly, without worsening my drunkenness into a mindless stupor, yet managed to keep my mind spinning at just the right tempo, cheeks flushed at just the right temperature, and just flirty enough before actually losing my shirt on a table dance

What is even better, is the fact that these guys are giving away free grub, so I saved big time on my budget (more beer money is always a victory), as I chomped down on some native Lisanderian lunch. I was fed Doublet, which is a Lisanderian stew, consisting of rice, red beans and beef, which is cooked in milk. The meal was creamy, overloaded with rich textures and powerful aromas. It is a simple, filling meal. With this, I enjoyed a side of something called Bolitas, which is fried nuggets filled with ham & cheese.

Couple these simple, cheap but extremely fulfilling food & drink experiences with a lot of humble, friendly folk, and you get the gist of the Lisanderian people: a true workers class type nation. If any Lisanderian is reading this blog, make sure that you visit the Docks District of the Waterstad Borough within Port Ember Megalopolis, as your type of people awaits you! I will also make sure to visit your nation very soon - as you can consider me intrigued!

Once I was satisfied that both my thirst and hunger needs have been met, I moved over to the DJ Stage, where DJ Goat Smasha was performing again, and as I have become a fan of his art, decided to spend a little under an hour enjoying his set, dancing my absolute heart out. I will link his webpage at the Resourceful Links segment of my blog, so be sure to check him out - and support the man!

With that, I linked up for yet another promising 14 minutes of rugby glory...

Port Emberian Rugby 7's Debut Tournament: News from over there

Port Ember Vs San Ortelio

Port Ember 26 - 12 San Ortelio

Whilst the game was filled with typical Port Emberian flair and physicality, the boys were visibly holding a bit back, especially when it came to defence, seemingly attempting to spare a bit of their bodies in a match which they knew made no real difference, as either winning or losing would allow them to pass through to the Cup challenge quarterfinals, and they would need every ounce of energy and centimeter of healthy muscle to take on the best of the best teams in the multiverse next.

Despite both squads slightly holding back, it was still a very exciting game, against a visibly better and more experienced squad. Luckily, Port Emberian passion, physical prowess, ability to thrive when underestimated and the team's secret weapon: the most passionate supporters ever; assisted our boys in blue in driving them ever forward to glory.

The San Ortelion squad managed to score the first try of the match, yet failed to convert a difficult corner kick.

The Lightning Dragons struck back swiftly, gaining two converted tries in quick succession, which saw the first half end with Port Ember leading 14-5.

The second half looked much the same, with San Ortelio opening the second half with a try, which was converted this time round, only to be punished for it in the form of suffering 2 tries against, of which only one was converted.

The opposition were not afforded the opportunity to regain momentum again, becoming yet another victim of the Port Emberian steamroller.

Score Breakdown
Port Ember

Tries:

#5 Stuart Niĉjo x 3
#7 Sheldon Merita x 1

Conversions:

#5 Stuart Niĉjo (C) : 3/4

San Ortelio

Tries:

[Redacted] x 2

Conversions:

[Redacted]: 1/2

With that final result, the group stages had officially concluded, with Port Ember shaking the very foundations of the tournament, advancing towards the Cup quarterfinals, within the feared "Group of Death" no less.

Our young, debutant squad, upon their very first attempt of this sport, managed to draw against the reigning world & tournament champions, defeat their mentors (and hosts), two top 30 veterans, and a fellow debutant squad, remaining undefeated in the face of overwhelming odds, drawing equal on points with none other than the champions, only dropped to second position on point difference. Allow me to tell you, as a girl who grew up with fairytales, this is the grandest one yet!

I need a drink.

Port Emberian Rugby 7's Debut Tournament: A looksie at the Cup Run

So, with the group stages at an end, Port Ember advances to the Cup challenge: The top 8 squads in the tournament from the group stages now advance to compete for the grandest prize in the tournament. Let us take a quick look at what is about to go down & dirty:

Match 1: Nova Anglicana vs Kriegiersien

The team of Nova Anglicana is a steamrolling rugby machine, currently ranked 4th on the world ranking, and one of the only two teams to have won every single group match so far (the other being Elejamie). Furthermore, with 187 points scored, they are the top scorers of the tournament so far. Their opponents, Kriegiersien, the 7th best rated squad on world rankings, have looked good this year, winning 4 and losing 1 of their group matches. This is going to be a tight match surely.

Match 2: Elejamie vs Lisander

Elajamie, the Elephants, the 3rd best squad per world rankings, have trampled their opposition this year, winning all 5 of their matches in absolute style, and conceded only 29 points in total, the best record this year. Lisander, the second best squad per world rankings are their opponents, and have had a good, yet somehow surprisingly difficult group stage. They have won 4 and lost 1 match so far, but have displayed some serious holes in both their offence & defence. Still, this match will see literal legends face off against legends. !!!AMPED!!!

Match 3: Abanhfleft vs TJUN-ia

So here we have the reigning champs, both the world champions, and the current AVBF Champions, and of course the number one ranked side in the entire sport, who has had a fantastic group stage - with the exception of drawing against the new rookies on the block…

Once they recovered from our wake up call, they have dominated every match and is once again one of the bookies favourites for the final. They are facing TJUN-ia, the 9th highest rated side, who has lost only one match in their group campaign. Another exciting match lined up here.

Match 4: Copper Cuprum vs Port Ember

Now here is the match which we are all excited about! On one hand, we have the infamous Chicken Slayers (Ps that is the nickname I have assigned, not their actual nickname), the 5th highest rated squad in world rankings, and a team in terribly good form. They might have lost one match in their group campaign, but in the remaining matches which they have won - they have looked very menacing. Scary scary scary.

Their opponents on the other hand, is a newcomer to the Sevens scene, attempting their very first shot at both the sport, and now, the very trophy. This team in question is the only debutant squad to have made it to the Cup challenge, and is currently punching way above their weight class. I am speaking of our very own Port Emver of course! The very poster child for underdogs everywhere. The excitement and nervousness is making me thirsty.

Till we meet again my lovies!

by **Copper Cuprum** » Sat Oct 23, 2021 11:08 am

DISCLAIMER: Gaelic Gamers is an independent sports blogging website created by four cousins with a common liking and passion for sports of all kinds and is in no way or form affiliated with or organized by any official news organization in the Democratic Republic of Abanhfleft. All statements and opinions posted here are our own and not anyone else's.

Gaelic Gamers
Presents...

The Rugby Rundown (Sevens Edition!)
with Graham O'Doherty

7TH AVBF SEVENS: DAY TWO, COPPER CUPRUM MATCH FIVE
Hello guys, and welcome back to another edition of The Rugby Rundown Sevens Edition with me, your gay Irishman Graham O'Doherty. Once again, I'm back to covering the exploits of the national rugby sevens league of the Chiefdom of Copper Cuprum, and I'm covering them as they play their final game of the pool stage against The Jovannic. This is fresh from their humiliation against Baker Park, which some might say they rightfully deserve after someone in the team thought it would be a good idea to put beer into a rubber chicken meant for the Copperite ritual. We all know how Copperites are attached to their rituals, and it seemed that their goddess of battle took offense to that. But, as we will soon see, all it took for the Copperites to regain the favor of their goddess was another properly executed chicken ritual.

The shaman shouted the appropriate prayers as he raised the rubber chicken in preparation for cutting its head off. The ceremonial knife passed through the rubber neck like it was hot butter, and unlike earlier in the morning, nothing spilled out of the headless body. The ritual went on as usual, with the Copperite players tossing the rubber chicken head between themselves like a game of hot potato. This properly executed ritual seemed enough for the Copperite goddess of battle to resume smiling upon her faithful followers as she saw fit to strike the players of The Jovannic dumb and make them just stand and watch while the men from the Chiefdom ran roughshod over them. The Copperites scored seven tries against The Jovannic. Seven bloody tries! If you thought Abanhfleft scoring six tries against Sixty-Nine X was impressive then this game was outright unbelievable! And this is against a team that actually puts in effort to play as best as possible! The Jovannic, even though they got smashed by Copper Cuprum, will at least leave this confrontation with their reputation mostly intact. Everyone knows about The Jovannic, even if they're not the best country in rugby sevens (or any other code of rugger for that matter). But nobody knows about Sixty-Nine X, and after that pitiful performance against Abanhfleft, they haven't given anyone a reason to care about them!

Sorry for turning this Rugby Rundown into yet another rant about Abanhfleft's most recent game. But seeing that team play without any energy at all really grinds my gears! And having watched The Jovannic continue playing with all their heart despite the overwhelming odds against them, it just amazes me that Sixty-Nine X managed to con their way into the AVBF Sevens! Also, there isn't a lot to talk about this game aside from the tries themselves. Copper Cuprum cut through The Jovannic's defenses like the shaman's knife through the neck of that rubber chicken. The Jovannic did their best to stem the tide but they just couldn't do anything to stop the onslaught. Their only relief came in both the half-time and full-time whistles. Outside of that, well, there was not much else they could do. And thus that's how Copper Cuprum ended up in the Cup quarterfinals alongside Port Ember. The selfish part of me wants to have an all-Coalition Cup final between Abanhfleft and Copper Cuprum, but knowing my luck, I might just end up bearing witness to something like Port Ember versus TJUN-ia or, dare I say it, Kriegiersien. Nothing against any of these sides, of course (except for maybe that last one). I just don't want to have to rundown either of the Revolutionaries or the Chief's Chosen bottling it yet again. I wonder how Riley's going to react when I explain the full history and significance of the Copperite chicken ritual to her. XOXO from Graham….

The Jovannic (0)
Try: N/A
Con: N/A

Copper Cuprum (41)
Try: Kasugna 1' c, 8' m
Massoudoglu 3' c
Oweda 5' c
Hizekte 9' m, 10' m, 12' m
Con: Massoudoglu (3/4)
Omega (0/3)

by **Brookstation** » Sat Oct 23, 2021 11:32 am

BROOKSTATION RUGBY LEAGUE

SEASON PREVIEW-1

Dreamland Falcons

Coach :- Bob Ferguson
Stadium :- Brochardt Oval
Jersey :-

Squad:-

Rudolf Ihbe (Prop)(20)(C)
Kenneth Shittu (Prop)(18)
Sulley Kennel(Hooker) (23)
Daryl Ndukwu(Scrum half)(26)
Edward Norwood(Fly half) (23)
Philip Maguire(Centre)(30)
Ron Andeh(Wing)(17)

Bench 
Anthony Thurston (Prop)(24)
Bobbie Blay (22)(Prop)
Eddie Arthur (25)(Hooker)
Mark Imrie(32)(Centre)
Tom Rowe (37)(Scrum Half)
Joe Trout (24)(Fly half)
Arthur Farley (21) (Wing)

Space Coast Galaxy

Coach :- Bill Ray 
Stadium :- Space Coast Showground
Jersey :-

Squad :-

Roger Ayinra (Prop)(30)
Peter Thompson (Prop)(20)
Des Buckley (Hooker)(21)
Ernst Lorenz (Scrum Half)(22)(C)
Brian Wagstaff (Fly half)(19)
Don Phelps (Centre)(28)
Robin Boys (Wing)(18)

Bench 
Allan Hoskins (Prop)(21)
George Paul (Prop)(36)
Robert Wasley (Hooker)(22)
Charles Sobrian (Scrum Half)(26)
James Clarke (Fly half)(17)
Jules Sexton (Wing)(19)

Halebid Rabbits 

Coach :- Tony Lee 
Stadium :- Humbank Stadium
Jersey :-

Squad:-

John Stewart (Prop)(24)
Robert Swansea (Prop)(31)(C)
Erich Hasselberg (Hooker)(21)
John Lacey (Scrum Half)(20)
Mike McGregor (32)(Fly Half)
Bobby Wenden (26)(Centre)
Bob Bennet (30)(Wing)

Bench 
John Windle (Prop)(18)
Ron Gilchrist (Prop)(31)
Sandy Jackson (Hooker)(27)
Ian Graham (Scrum Half)(28)
Tony Abraham (Fly half)(23)
Tom Jerome (Centre)(25)
Harry Robinson (Wing)(24)

Rottenham Dragons 

Coach :- Stanley Roberts 
Stadium :- The Cauldron
Jersey:-

Squad:-

Edwin Allotey (Prop)(24)
Wendell Bernard (Prop)(28)
Ken Mottley (Hooker)(21)
Wilson Clough (Scrum Half)(24)
Carl Andt(Fly Half)(19)(C)
Noel Kiprugut (Centre)(17)
Alan Keino (Wing)(22)

Bench 
Kip Simpson (Prop)(19)
Bill Alder (Prop)(29)
Jim Adcocks (Hooker)(26)
David Parker (Scrum Half)(21)
Mike Hemery (Fly Half)(30)
Kingsley Roche (Centre)(25)
Ken Agbabokha (Wing)(31)

Artiana Jacksons

Coach :- Peter O'Brien 
Stadium :- Artiana Stadium
Jersey :-

Squad :-
 
Charles Bone (Prop)(24)(C)
Kenny Welsh (Prop)(23)
Pablo Mends (Hooker)(25)
Jordi Llovera (Scrum Half)(22)
Albert Torres (Fly Half)(34)
Americo de Ridder (Centre)(23)
Enric van Dittmar (Wing)(24)

Bench 

Victor Rios (Prop)(27)
Louis di Lovera (Prop)(25)
Oscar Figueaira (Hooker)(34)
Steven Guss (Scrum Half)(30)
Alistair Lee (Fly Half)(19)
Andrew Allen (Centre)(25)
Chris Hislop (Wing)(27)

Cosque Wingers 

Coach :- David Paul
Stadium :- Wellermore Stadium
Jersey :-

Squad:-

Cameron Holland (Prop)(20)
Vicky Richmond (Prop)(23)
Mike Coates (Hooker)(31)
Colin Medhurst (Scrum Half)(26)
Erwin Klammer (Fly Half)(21)
Bill Bevan (Centre)(20)(C)
Franz Hoflener (Wing)(23)

Bench

Helmut Steiner (Prop)(25)
Anton Enn (Prop)(19)
Walter Horn (Hooker)(30)
Rudolf Eder (Centre) (23)
Alfred Schruder (Scrum Half)(25)
Walter Krispel (Fly Half)(18)
Gunter Grossing (Wing)(19)

by **Jumnia** » Sat Oct 23, 2021 1:44 pm

The Jumnian Chronicles
Special Section: Seventh Annual AVBF Rugby Sevens Tournament

The "Sky Ravens" ruins dreams

Jumnia 19-17Baker Park

The debuting Jumnian National Rugby Sevens team, nicknamed the 'Sky Ravens' has maintained momentum, delivering a magnificent upset, destroying dreams in the process.

The 'Sky Ravens' commenced their international career within the Seventh Annual AVBF Rugby Sevens Tournament, by losing against the second highest ranked international team of Lisander yesterday morning, yet managed to regain composure by defeating The Jovannic in their second match. However, this budding momentum was halted with great efficiency against the squad of the Chiefdom of Copper Cuprum. Luckily the evening break seemed to be a good thing, allowing the squad to rest and regroup, leading to a beautiful comeback against Juvencus.

Now, the Jumnian newcomers defeated the formidable team of Baker Park, thus stealing their chances of contending for the AVBF Cup, and instead forcing them to join Jumnia in contesting for the AVBF Plate instead.

The Baker Park squad demonstrated their experience in the opening salvo of the derby by grabbing onto and maintaining possession after their kick off, constantly probing the defensive lines of the Jumnians by trying to crush through them, yet quickly realising that the legion of 18 year old warriors were packing an unbelievably heavy, physical punch.

The experienced veterans quickly swapped play around, pulling in the defenders, before offloading wide, creating an easy overlap, which led to two beautiful corner tries, by Tim Knopper and Harris O'Neil, both converted by flyhalf Lucas Odekume. The first half came to an end only when Lucas Odekume managed to slot through a penalty kick, due to a high tackle by Jumnian prop, Trygve Naess.

The commencement of the second half saw a reborn Jumnian squad, who managed to launch a plethora of various attacking strategies, leading to a try by Jumnian goal machine, Terézia Bakke. This was converted easily by flyhalf and captain, Åse Thomassen.

Only a few plays later, Terézia Bakke was at it again, flying into the score zone, in between the uprights, after catching a perfect tactical kick launched by Thomassen. Again, converted with ease.

Just as the crowd made peace with the fact that the game had finished with a nail biting 17-14 Baker Park victory, as time had ran out, legend in the making Bakke chased down and slapped into the attempted kick-out by Odekume, forcing the ball to grubber backwards, being picked up by Bakke, who placed down a very near to being out corner try. The conversion attempt failed, yet it made no difference - Jumnia won with a measly 2 points.

The giants have been slain.

Match 5 Overview

Jumnia vs The Baker Park

Final Score: Jumnia 19 - Baker Park 17

Score Breakdown:
Jumnia:

Tries:

#7 Terézia Bakke x 3

Conversions:

#5 Åse Thomassen (2/3)

Baker Park:

Tries:

Tim Knopper x 1
Harris O'Neil x 1

Conversions:

Lucas Odekume: (2/2)

Penalties:

Lucas Odekume x 1

Venue Played:

Confederacy Park Exhibition Pitch B

From our Analyst:

This match was a true example of what international rugby should be: an absolute nail biting display of tough, contested rugby. The Jumnian squad should feel extremely proud of what they had accomplished here today, and should enter the Plate Quarterfinals with loads of confidence.

Plate Quarterfinals Preview

Jumnia vs Lathamford

Venue: Confederacy Park Exhibition Pitch B

Brief Summary:

Jumnia will face off against Lathamford next - a fellow debutant team, as part of the Plate Quarterfinals, the trophy series for all teams who finished 3rd & 4th in the group stages. In the group stages, Lathamford managed to win three matches, whilst losing two in turn, making a number of impressed waves in the process.

by **StrayaRoos** » Sat Oct 23, 2021 2:55 pm

The Celebrations for the Roos in Neu Engollon are just beginning as the Sevens team has secured top seed for the
Bowl Quarterfinals and will play Britonsea and today we preview the Bowl QF starting with the Roosian squad the first player is the Top try scorer for the Roosian Sevens side:William King who in his 5 games has scored 7 tries
Then Felix Cjellberg who has 3 tries and an field goal,Although the real stars as because of them we managed 17th in the group phase as the points for and against are 93-107 the next best team is sevendia with 66-130 and are hopeful about their chances of bringing home the first international trophy StrayaRoos has won with the bowl as the National Volleyball Team finished 11th in the world expo and the Basketball side is hoping to win IBC33

by **Elejamie** » Sat Oct 23, 2021 3:40 pm

Dave Carrey's Guide to the 7th AVBF Sevens - Group C
Dave Carrey - Burgenden, Neu Engollon

So that actually wasn't too difficult. While I still remain the sort of person who believes that you should never underestimate someone, I will admit that that was an instance where it would've been OK to have been complacent. Out of our five opponents, only two of them were any sort of real threat to us on paper and we easily beat them. One team we did have a small struggle against but we were still able to come away with an easy win. We even had a team who had failed to score a single point for just over nine halves! Maybe it was because, again, some major faces were absent so we didn't have any serious competition but, either way, it was a good group stage. Now, let's take a look back at how we did:

Gary Toda, seen here in action for Davenport against
Elejamie City last season, ran roughshod over
StrayaRoos.

The first match was against StrayaRoos, a team that's new to the world of sevens but could possibly be a fairly decent side if they completely put their mind to it. And I'm going to sum this match up in one paragraph for the simple reason that it was mostly uneventful. The first five minutes were full of decent defending and alright attacking but nothing particularly notworthy. And then Yui King scored the opening try, which was converted by both Jimmy Cai and the grace of two or three gods. 7-0 down by a team we were favoured to beat after they held us scoreless for about 2/5 of the match isn't a good prize no matter how you look at it. Fortunately Adam McCracken was about to score two on the bounce and, when coupled with two successful conversions by Gary Toda, gave us a 14-7 lead at half-time. Toda scored a try of his own but couldn't convert it as his kick was too low. Paul Koppel then went on to score another brace which, when combined with Toda getting another two conversions, meant that we were the 33-7 winners. A win that seemed good on paper but in reality was a bit of a slog for a fair percentage of the match.

Then came Kriegiersien, a team we had been facing a fair amount lately. I'm not sure if a rivalry is brewing between us given that we've played each other a fair amount lately but it depends on whether or not their rugby board wants to make it official. Either way, they were coming off a 42-0 demolition of Britonisea which saw them top the group. It was enough to make them feel a bit better, at least. And, indeed, they were keeping the scores tight throughout most of the first half, only keeping it 10-0 for the first half with the only points being a Toda penalty after three minutes and a David Kramer try (also converted by Toda) after five. We did keep it very tight for them, however, as we were able to force them into touch whenever they were in smelling distance of the 22. Not to mention the interception when they made it past that.

The second half was a bit more action packed. Toda scored a try of his own less than a minute after the start of the second half, which he was fortunately able to convert. That seemed to be a small hint to our defence that they could relax as Yukko Kiirvaz Jr. was able to score a try for his side two minutes later despite Marcus Ruiz trying to push him into touch and Riley Kroger trying to clear the ball. On the upside, Kriegiersien's fly-half Damian Druid wasn't able to convert it. His kick wasn't anywhere close. Luckily McCracken scored a try another couple of minutes later and Koppel the minute after that; both tries were converted by Toda. In the end, we forced the ball into touch to end the match 31-5. It may not have been much but it was enough to catapult us to the top of the group.

And to round off the first day we had HUElavia. Again, a whole load of not much to talk about here or at least not enough that's worth dividing it up into two paragraphs. Toda scored the opening try and was able to convert it, although play had to stop for a little bit just to check if the ball was actually grounded past the line. Then they came close to scoring but were forced into touch just inches from the try line. A second attempt suffere the same fate. McCracken was able to score but the ball was grounded in a place where Toda was unable to convert it properly. And, indeed, his shot went just wide of the uprights, although 12-0 was a decent score going into half-time. Patrick Hayden came on in Koppel's place for the second half and scored a try not long after he came on, with Toda being able to convert it. He was also able to make up for that missed conversion earlier by scoring a penalty to make it 22-0. Our defence dropped the ball (literally and figuratively) which lead to them scoring but fortunately they were too far to the right to make it count. Kramer scored try number four just seconds before time and, with Toda's successful conversion, we were not only 29-5 victors but also 3-0-0 to round off the first day.

The second day was quite tense to begin with but still not anything worth worrying about. After all, our opponents were the plucky little Lathamford, a team that were new to the competition but were actually doing quite well. They were also 3-0-0 with wins over HUElavia, StrayaRoos and Britonisea and were looking to carry on that streak. And then they played us and it just ended up being a bit one-sided, although they did give us a good fight. After Toda scored an early penalty due to a poorly-timed tackle by Augustine Eagleport on David Kramer, he would go on to score the first try of the match a little while later with a try right underneath the posts to ensure he'd convert it easily. Kramer would score try number two halfway through the first half, with Toda converting that as well. However, just as the half was about to end, Lathamford's vice captain Roy Fishlungs would score a sneaky try which his fly-half Arthur Wolfpacks was able to convert. No matter, a 17-7 lead at half-time's still decent enough.

The second half was essentially both sides trying to get one over their opponent. One side would push their teammates as far as they could into enemy territory before turning the ball over for one reason or another so their opposition could do the same. Lathamford were even 3m from the line when Kramer retrieved the ball and passed it to Toda for his second attempt. Eventually Koppel was just able to ground the ball past the line, with Toda converting it although not without some difficulty as the ball just squeezed through the uprights. With less than a minute left, Adam McCracken went on to put the final nail in the coffin when he managed to score a try while he was in the clear. Fortunately, he grounded the ball much closer to the posts to make sure that Toda wouldn't have as much of an issue kicking it. He converted it easily and the match eventually ended 31-7 in Elejamie's favour. Not just that but they secured a spot in the Cup quarter-finals to boot.

And, to round things off, we had Britonisea. A team that, unfortunately, wasn't doing so hot? In what way? So far, they had failed to score a single point. 42-0 against Kriegiersien, 40-0 against HUElavia, 48-0 against Lathamford and 43-0 to StrayaRoos. By this point they were merely playing for pride but even then it was clearly obvious that there wasn't much of that either. Besides, it gave Kevin Gabriel an excuse to make a couple of changes and rest a few players. Tom Correy came on instead of Marcus Ruiz, Tim Crespin was scrum-half instead of David Kramer and there was an Adam swap as Gates came on in lieu of McCracken. Indeed, Crespin scored the opening try around 25 seconds into the half, which Toda converted. Toda would go on to convert a try by Paul Koppel a few minutes later before finally converting a second from Crespin less than a minute before the end of the half. The first half may not have had much to talk about without resorting to filler but still, a 21-0 lead wasn't too shabby.

Kevin Gabriel, seen here posing for a press
release, has shown that he was easily able to
fit into the role of head coach.

The second half on the other hand got off to a bad start for us, as Correy would be given a yellow card for a particularly bad tackle. As he sat in the sin bin, we didn't have that extra manpower and, as a result, the Britonish finally got their first set of points much to the delight of any of their fans who were still attending the matches. Our only saving grace was that it was just millimetres from the touch line so they were unable to add the prerequisite extras. No matter, we were still leading by 16 at this point. We did slow down a bit here and Toda decided to get a couple of drop goals, just to avoid running up the score. Adam Gates would go on to score the final try of the match which may have been a bit too left of the posts but Toda was still able to score the extra pointers. Add in a third drop goal, this time from Crespin, just past the 14-minute-mark and you have a 40-5 shellacking that, while not perfect, still shows that it's not who you have on your side but what you do with them.

As a result of that win, we were able to finish top of the group with an impressive five wins out of five. One other team finished with the same record but we'll get onto them in a bit. What's even more impressive is that we managed to only allow a total of 29 points, an average of 5.8 points per game, giving us the best defensive record as well. Not the best offensive record (as it was literally the second best one) but it was still an impressive 164 points for, meaning we scored a whopping 32.8 points per game. Overall, we had a point differential of +135, which isn't too bad. There were a few areas where there could've been a bit of tweaking but overall it was an excellent effort and I have no reason to believe that we won't stand a chance in the Cup.

So how did everyone else in our group do? Kriegiersien were able to hold on to the other Cup spot with a 26-14 win, which means that they now face Nova Anglicana, who are the aforementioned "other team" that had the best offensive record, second best defensive record, best point differential and the only other side with a perfect 5-0-0 record. Lathamford, who were on the receiving end of that loss, will have to settle for third place and a match against Jumnia in the Plate stage. HUElavia had to settle for fourth despite or because of a 26-12 win in their last group stage game, meaning they'll play hosts Neu Engollon. And StrayaRoos and Britonisea, fifth and sixth respectively, will not only have to play for the Bowl but also play against each other. Considering the former were 43-0 victors in their last bout, the Britonish will probably have to finally wake up if they wish to stand a chance.

So how about the other big names? How did they fare? Lisander managed to finally shake off the cobwebs and grab a 40-12 win over Juvencus to finish in second place. There, they'll play against Elejamie for not only a spot in the semi-finals but also the Tillman Trophy, the trophy that both sides compete for in union and sevens competitions. It probably helps that it was originally shipped over to Neu Engollon in anticipation for a potential match-up and it ended up being a good call, although it's just a question of whether we'll be taking it back home again or if Lisander will win it. Elsewhere reigning world champs Abanhfleft and second placed Port Ember (both of whom were also undefeated but had a 19-19 draw against each other) took the two Cup spots and will face TJUN-ia and Copper Cuprum respectively. And Baker Park, who looked like they were going to make it into the Cup stage before a crushing 19-17 loss to Jumnia scuppered those plans, will play the Natanians and Nosts who are hoping to bounce back after a 42-0 humiliation at the hands of Brookstation who, in turn, will play San Ortelio.

As I don't have anything else I could talk about, at least nothing I can't already mention in my blog, I might as well call it here. It won't be long before the next batch of games are played anyway so I might as well try and book my place there. I might see if I can bump into any of my fellow reporters over here, as there are a fair few and it might be nice for all five of us to have a get together. Maybe share some rugby stories as well. And trust me, I have a fair few as I'm only 50 years young and I've been writing articles for this site for over 25 years. And if that doesn't happen then at least there are some of the players hanging around while they wait for their matches to start, maybe I could get a quick interview in just to see how they're doing. I've rambled enough now so I'm going to get myself ready to watch some more high-octane sevens action. I urge you all to do the same. And with that said, Dave out.

More from Dave Carrey:

Dave Carrey's Guide to the 7th AVBF Sevens - Group C

Dave's Blog: We Return To Neu Engollon

Dave Carrey's Brief Guide to the ERC 2021-22 Season

ERC Sevens 2021 Round-up

by **Neu Engollon** » Sat Oct 23, 2021 10:09 pm

Seventh Annual AVBF Sevens Tournament (2021 Edition)
Cup/Plate/Bowl Quarterfinals

Quarterfinals

Cup
Kriegiersien 17–31 Nova Anglicana
Lisander 10–26 Elejamie
Abanhfleft 26–21 TJUN-ia
Copper Cuprum 22–19 Port Ember

Plate
Natanians and Nosts 14–31 Baker Park
HUElavia 5–35 Neu Engollon
San Ortelio 19–29 Brookstation
Jumnia 28–12 Lathamford

Bowl
Britonisea 7–33 StrayaRoos
Sevendia 40–0 The Jovannic
Licentian Isles 29–7 Juvencus
Sixty-Nine X 17–19 Arjunnagar

Semifinal Matchups

Cup
Elejamie v Copper Cuprum
Nova Anglicana v Abanhfleft

Plate
Neu Engollon v Brookstation
Jumnia v Baker Park

Bowl
Sevendia v Licentian Isles
Arjunnagar v StrayaRoos

World Cup 81/82/83/84

ZA: "Hey, hey! Zane Anthony here with another episode of Lots of Ruck ahead of the final day of the AVBF Sevens, as well as the Festival itself. As usual, Rick is too hung over to be able to join the show right now, because he was alternating between 'angry' and 'happy' Ricky G after the close of play Saturday. A completely fluke try at the final whistle, that was almost certainly a knock-on, helped newcomers Jumnia get a 19-17 win over the BlueGrays in final pool match which knocked us out of the Cup and into the Plate.

Graham O'Doherty and our newest friend Riley Heglion from Port Ember came over to join us at Pitch B to watch Copper Cuprum and help me try to get Ricky to calm down; he was absolutely furious, and was convinced that there was some sort of anti-BP/anti-Atlantian Oceania conspiracy at work. Fair play to Riley, who took Ricky on an extended scavenger hunt which got his blood pressure back into a normal range.

Meanwhile the Chieftains put our neighbors The Jovannic to the sword to book their place in the Cup quarters, and then the four of us went over to Pitch B to see the Fleftics advance over a Sixty-Nine X side that frankly was so criminally poor that Graham got close to losing his shit in the same way Ricky did for our match.
I think the four of us (me, RG, Riley and Graham, plus a couple of others in the stands near us) would've put up more of struggle against the holders than S-NX did.

After that was lunch, where I forced Ricky to stuff himself full of sausages, dumplings, potato pancakes and slaw so he wouldn't be able to get too sauced before the evening, when the 'Graham O'Doherty' portion of the festivities would begin as we took full advantage of the Festival tents.
Oh, I should probably mention for our newer listeners--and thanks to Graham and Riley we've had thousands of new downloads, so thanks to all of you--Ricky G is just a shade under six feet tall and currently runs about 255-260 pounds. His wife Deb, who is my first cousin, will make him get down to about 235-240 for a good part of the year, but she knows when the rugger is on, he's going to go crazy.

And also, since he's my cousin-in-law, I'm supposed to watch out for him when we're on our adventures, which of course I've done since we've been best friends since age 12. OK, memory lane is closed and we'll detour back to the Neu Engellon Rugby Expressway. One final aside, the locals here have gone out of their way to make us feel like part of the family, as it were. So a shoutout to them.

When the pairings for the Cup, Plate and Bowl quarterfinals were announced, Baker Park earned the number one seed for the Plate, and were drawn against Natanians & Nosts. Abanhfleft, Copper Cuprum and Port Ember all made it into the Cup.

Well, the boys shrugged off the last minute defeat and handled N&N 31-14 to move into the semis, where they will square off against...Jumnia. The winner will face either the hosts or Brookstation in the Plate Final. Meanwhile, CC were drawn against Port Ember and came through with a 22-19 victory, and the Fleftics also had a tough opponent in TJUN-ia, whom they got past 26-21; now a possible Graham O'Doherty dream Cup Final depends on the two APOC nations getting through the semis.

That's all for now, we'll be back--hopefully with Ricky--around 2100 BPST with the final wrap-up. Thanks for tuning in to Lots of Ruck."

by **Brookstation** » Mon Oct 25, 2021 7:40 am

TURTLE

Jackie was very excited to play rugby, but he wouldn't get to play a match without practising. He went to the practice field and there he got to see a tall, long haired person, probably a fifth year. He looked stout and confident. He was standing beside Rudolf and he stepped forward and said -" I am Charles Bone, the captain of the team. I hope all the first years are here ?"

" And I am Rudolf Ihbe, the vice captain of your team. Nice to meet you all. "

After taking the names of the first years and giving them a basic idea about the sport, the first years went with Rudolf to learn the basics whereas the others went for general practise. Whereas, most players were more interested in handling the weird shaped ball, Jackie was more interested in tackling people or stopping others.

" Hey. I am not interested to see how the ball bounces, I want to learn how to stop people. Do it already !" said Jackie

Charles came from behind and grabbed Jackie by the ears and pulled them hard. " First rule for being in the team is that you need to learn how to respect elders . We want energetic players but not ones who lack basic manners."

Jackie groaned and fell down. He then murmured - " I want to do it. I want to tackle someone."

Charles turned back and said - " Fine. If you are so desperate to tackle, then I will let you tackle me. Come ahead !"

Jackie's eyes sparkled. He got on his feet and ran right towards Charles with all his might just to be thrown away. He still didn't give up. He got up and tried to push Charles down. Charles could understand the determination in Jackie. He could understand that this boy would go on to become a good player. He said - " Rudolf, from today onwards make him do the turtle."

" Huh ? Are you serious ? I think he needs a bit of basic training first. "

" Rudolf , you know I never joke about such things. "

" Alright. "

" Hey kid , if you do your practice everyday properly, I will let you tackle me five times a day." said Charles.

The turtle is a practice where the person has to have both hands on the ground. The rugby ball will be placed on his back and he has to move on four arms trying to prevent the ball from falling. It is a test of strength and agility.

When Jackie was first made to do this, he could only last for 20 minutes until he collapsed but as days passed by , he kept getting better at it. While all the other first years would learn basics , he would keep doing the turtle.

Often he asked what was the use of doing this but the answer was always the same.

" Charles never makes anyone do anything without a proper reason. "

What annoyed him the most was the fact that even though a week had passed by , he wasn't even able to throw Charles down even once. Tries after tries went in vain. Every evening he used to think about when he would be able to prove his talent. Will it ever happen ?

Two weeks had passed and now it was safe ti say that Jackie had mastered the turtle but yet it had shown no results. He hadn't been able to make even one successful tackle.

It was evening and there was light showers. Carl had come to the field just to check on Charles when he saw Charles trying to push the tree.

" Hey Charles , there is no need of taking so much pressure. A skill isn't mastered overnight. " said Carl.

" You don't understand it. I have always been mocked because of my height but I wanted to prove that height isn't everything. I wanted to prove myself in rugby...... Wait a minute. Hey tree trunk , you have the same physical attributes as Charles. I can practice upon you. "

Carl got surprised but didn't hesitate to say yes.

It was next afternoon and practice had ended shortly. It was again time for Jackie's five tackles. Again with the same enthusiasm he went as always but failed. It was time for his fifth tackle. He had practiced on Carl the day before. All that practice couldn't go in vain. He ran at a slower pace then usual and after that something shocking happened....

Charles had been tackled by Jackie !! Something which even other college wingers couldn't do that easily.

Everyone was stunned. They couldn't believe what they saw.

" Yess. I knew it . I knew I could do this. All my practice didn't go in vain. I was made to do the turtle to be able to maintain the proper position while tackling and I also understood that no matter how tough your opponent is, they are weak in the region near the ankle. " said Jackie cheerfully. The expression on his face was something different altogether.

Charles got up and smiled.

works? · by **Abanhfleft** » Mon Oct 25, 2021 8:36 am

DISCLAIMER: Gaelic Gamers is an independent sports blogging website created by four cousins with a common liking and passion for sports of all kinds and is in no way or form affiliated with or organized by any official news organization in the Democratic Republic of Abanhfleft. All statements and opinions posted here are our own and not anyone else's.

Gaelic Gamers
Presents...

The Rugby Rundown (Sevens Edition!)
with Graham O'Doherty

7TH AVBF SEVENS: CUP QUARTERFINALS (ABANHFLEFT)
Hello guys, and welcome back to another edition of The Rugby Rundown Sevens Edition with me, your gay Irishman Graham O'Doherty. We're already in the sharp end of the 7th AVBF Sevens, with everyone taking part in the quarterfinals of the Cup, the Bowl, and the Plate. Abanhfleft and our Coalition allies Copper Cuprum are both in the Cup, and the first game of our earnest defense of the Maracalo Cup starts with TJUN-ia. Now, unlike our most recent opponents before them, TJUN-ia are actually a great team. They're rising stars in many fields, not just rugby sevens. They're making a name for themselves in football, baseball, basketball, and even motorsports! They will surely give our Revolutionaries the fight that they deserve, especially after that mess of a "game" against Sixty-Nine X. This one will be a proper game of rugby worthy of the name!

And it was indeed a fantastic game. Real end to end stuff! None of the teams ever really looked like they had much of an advantage over the other, and that's a good thing because you don't know who's going to come out the winners at the end of the fourteen minutes! And that's all a rugby fanatic would want. Well, if I was a neutral, that's what I would want. As a natural-born Fleftic citizen, it's my civic and moral responsibility to support my national team even if they have constantly and consistently let me down before. You know how I mentioned that Abanhfleft might not be ready for whoever they had to face in the quarterfinals because of that limpid performance by Sixty-Nine X? Well, I need not have worried, apparently. Abanhfleft were right in the game and giving TJUN-ia all they got. If one team scored then the other responded in kind. And both teams' kickers were finally on point, making all of the conversions so far. It went right down to the wire, just as it should have. Both teams were on 21 points apiece with time running out, and while nobody wanted the match to go on to extra time, at the same time nobody wanted the game to end with a winner and a loser. But somebody had to lose in order for someone to win and move on, and the loser would turn out to be TJUN-ia. Justin Reid made things a little bit interesting by missing the conversion for the fourth and final Abanhfleft try, but there wasn't a lot of time for TJUN-ia to do something about it, and in the end there was nothing the Jaguars could do.

Of course, this loss will be a disappointing one for TJUN-ia, but they surely will take heart in the fact that they were able to stand toe-to-toe with the defending Maracalo Cup champions. And like I said, the Jaguars are rising stars. If they play rugby as good as they drive their cars then we're going to be seeing more of them soon. I just hope that we don't start losing more games to the Jaguars than we're winning! But, knowing our history, we almost certainly will start losing more games than winning. It's like the law of inevitability: it will happen, sooner or later. All I can really hope for is that it will happen later. And that's not even getting to our semifinals opponents, Nova Anglicana. It's nothing but the latest chapter in the growing rivalry between the Revolutionaries and the Lions. Who's going to come out on top this time around? To trot out the old bloody cliche, there is only one way to find out. At least we'll have the night to rest and think about the day's events. I sure could use some sleep, but after all this excitement, I've still got more adrenaline in my veins than I know to do with. And the beer isn't helping like the last time. XOXO from Graham….

Abanhfleft (26)
Try: Rakitic 3' c
Greathouse 6' c
Votaw 10' c
Sourd 14' m
Con: Reid (3/4)

TJUN-ia (21)
Try: Verdunois 4' c
Rossi 5' c
Gawakali 12' c
Con: (3/3)

by **Elejamie** » Mon Oct 25, 2021 11:52 am

Kevin Gabriel was a bit pleased with his squad following the match. Not only did they retain the Tillman Trophy but they were through to the semi-finals of the Cup stage of the AVBF 7s. One more match to go and they'll be through to the finals, especially since the losers of the semis will just be eliminated entirely. But he didn't want to think about that. Not yet, anyway.

Instead, he wanted to reflect on the match that just happened. The 26-10 win over Lisander, one of their biggest rivals in the rugby world. A rivalry so big that it warranted its own trophy. However, this match felt a bit off, compared to the bouts of past. Kevin suspected that it was the fact that they felt a bit lacklustre during the group stage, as evidenced by a couple of fairly weak games against Baker Park and Copper Cuprum despite the rebound they had during the second day. Whatever it was, he didn't want to give them any quarter so he instructed his players to treat it like any other match. Most of his players did exactly that, as evidenced by them keeping the scoring chances low (to the point where only one player from the opposing side scored any points), but he felt that one or two players weren't really playing up to their true potential. No matter, they still had the best defensive record despite allowing double digit points for the first time all tourney. Regardless, he made himself a small list of his thoughts on each player during that match and maybe there'll be something he could fit into a quick word during training tomorrow.

Marcus Ruiz: Did a fairly decent job. Managed to keep them away from the touch line on a consistent basis. Did make a couple of blunders but nothing too disastrous. Could work on his vision and drive a bit more. 8/10
Riley Kroger: Some slip-ups here and there but nothing worth worrying about. While the off-side did lead to that try Lisander scored, a quick word and a quick lesson on staying on-side won't go amiss. 7/10
Diego Molina: Was solid throughout the match. Tackling was decent and marking was good. Could've done better with pre-match exercises as he felt a bit winded and sprained towards the end. 7/10

David Kramer: Was solid offensively and defensively. Worked very well on the scrum and scored an excellent try. Movement and vision worked wonders as well but could've done better to prevent marking. 9/10
Gary Toda: Kicking was on point the whole day despite the lack of tries. The one conversion he missed and the drop attempt that missed can't even be used against him as the first one was too wide and he didn't have the space or time to get the latter done properly. 10/10
Paul Koppel: Very nimble and precise with his tries. A good amount of speed and well-timed tackles also helped him here. 10/10
Adam McCracken: Worked well defensively but could've used some improvements offensively. First half was fairly weak but still solid enough for a positive score. Small improvement in the second but still warranted taking off. 6/10

Vili Cinorim: Came on towards the end but still did a decent job with the one and a half minutes he did. Tackles were on point and he was able to block with the chances he did. Drives were on point too. 9/10.
Tom Correy: Came on briefly to replace Molina while he was having a breather. Not much to say but was still a solid player with some hard tackles. 7/10
Tim Crespin: Didn't play. N/A
Patrick Hayden: Didn't play. N/A
Adam Gates: What the other Adam should've been with a good amount of offensive prowess. Scored a try even though I felt he could've gotten closer to the uprights before grounding. Defence could've used work but was still happy with what I had gotten. 7.5/10

Once that was out of the way. Kevin had a quick look through the rest of the schedule he was given and filled in any blanks that he needed to. Not just in his memory but rather to make sure the right person was facing the right person. He then looked down and had a good look at his next opponent. Copper Cuprum. The chicken-slaughterers. Fortunately here they're obligated to use a rubber chicken which'll hopefully be a lot less off-putting. They've done fairly well so far since finishing runners-up at the Plate portion of the last World Cup, finishing top of their group with a 4-0-1 record (and even beating Lisander in a tense 26-20 thriller) with their sole loss being a 28-10 defeat to Baker Park in their penultimate game. They then followed it up with a narrow 22-19 win over Port Ember, although since Kevin didn't pay that much attention to that match he didn't know how close it was.

But what if his side won? Who would their potential opponent be? Either Nova Anglicana who were one of the best teams in the tournament, or Abanhfleft who had defeated Kevin's side in the finals of the last Sevens World Cup. The former were an absolutely dynamite team when it came to offence, as they had scored a whopping 187 points in the the group stage and added a further 31 in their match against Kriegiersien. Their defence wasn't anything to be sniffed at either, as they only allowed 40 points total in the group stage (and even got a shutout against the Natanians and Nosts), although the 17 they conceded to Kriegiersien might be a bit of a stain. Abanhfleft are undefeated but the 19-19 opening draw against the aforementioned Port Ember side was the only thing preventing them from a perfect record. They had a fairly solid offence and defence as well, 154 points for and 48 against in the group stage, but there were still some gaps that needed to be plugged as evidenced by the 26-21 win over TJUN-ia. Whoever won would be a tough opponent but it was just a matter of getting there.

And Kevin wanted to get there. After all, his side had a lot of promise and a lot of momentum going into their next game. Sure the impenetrable defence would end up having a few holes, which was why he was immediately ruling out a shut-out. But he was still confident that his side would keep the Copperites to a fairly low score. There was the big question of whether or not his side would have a solid enough offence to carry on this point-scoring streak but he didn't see why he shouldn't. Their defence wasn't bad but he was sure they was enough holes in them that his side would grind them down. It might've been what happened against Port Ember, after all. But until then, all he had to do was come up with a game plan and then wait for the match. Anything could happen, after all.

by **Copper Cuprum** » Mon Oct 25, 2021 12:49 pm

DISCLAIMER: Gaelic Gamers is an independent sports blogging website created by four cousins with a common liking and passion for sports of all kinds and is in no way or form affiliated with or organized by any official news organization in the Democratic Republic of Abanhfleft. All statements and opinions posted here are our own and not anyone else's.

Gaelic Gamers
Presents...

The Rugby Rundown (Sevens Edition!)
with Graham O'Doherty

7TH AVBF SEVENS: CUP QUARTERFINALS (COPPER CUPRUM)
Hello guys, and welcome back to another edition of The Rugby Rundown Sevens Edition with me, your gay Irishman Graham O'Doherty. I'm back covering Copper Cuprum's journey through the 7th AVBF Sevens in their quest for rugby sevens silverware, and I'm covering the Chief's Chosen alongside Riley Heglion from Blog of a Crazy Nomad. You know what else is crazy? Two days ago, neither one of us knew each other. We knew of each other through our respective blogs, but we didn't know each other as people. But two days in Burgunden has changed all that for the better. Rugby does bring out the best in people sometimes, and we don't even have to be playing it!

Now why would I be covering Copper Cuprum alongside the Crazy Nomad herself? I hear you all asking. The answer is simple, my lovelies. Copper Cuprum are playing against Port Ember, which also happens to be Riley's home country! It's the Chief's Chosen against the Thunder Dragons, and only one can emerge victorious and move on to the semifinal. Before the game started though, I took the time to explain to Riley the history and significance of the Copperite chicken ritual, from its origins as an actual war dance to how it became part of Copperite rugby culture because of their belief that rugby was itself a ceremonial battle, and then the controversies surrounding the ritual and why Chief Deg decided that decapitating rubber chickens on foreign soil was the only policy choice he could make that would keep everyone happy (or at least not as angry). I did seem to have lost Riley's attention at around the Darmeni animal rights activist got his brains smashed in by the shaman Uncle Doc, and the appearance of the teams on the pitch may have had something with it, so I decided to leave my historical and cultural lesson at that and just enjoy the match. And good thing too because, like the Abanhfleft versus TJUN-ia match earlier this day, everything was end to end. Everyone was getting their money's worth. First the Copperites were leading, and now Port Ember had cut the deficit to their opponents, and then Copper Cuprum regained the lead once again, and then everything changed. Hiram Massoudoglu once again had a shocker where he doesn't have much going for him (except that one conversion) before finally, Copper Cuprum came away with the win.

I do hope that Riley decides to stay tonight even though her team is already out. She's been a fun person to hang around and have some food and drink. If she does leave though, know that she'll always remain in our hearts. Wait a minute thought. Sounds like she's passed away or something. Oh well. The Chief's Chosen are up against Elejamie this time. Ooh, how was that matchup made? You know what, never mind. Let the rugger do the talking. It'll be interesting to see if we have an all-Coalition final or if Nova Anglicana will knock out the Revolutionaries of Abanhfleft. This one's staying right here because of that. XOXO from Graham….

Copper Cuprum (22)
Try: Omega 2' m, 8' m
Pomela 4' c
Bachulu 11' m
Con: Massoudoglu (1/4)

Port Ember (19)
Try: Merita 1' c, 5' m
Paĉjo 10' c
Con: Niĉjo (2/3)

by **Jumnia** » Mon Oct 25, 2021 2:30 pm

Blog of The Crazy Nomad

Blog Series: Seventh Annual AVBF Rugby Sevens Tournament.

♡ Part 1
♡ Part 2
♡ Part 3
♡ Part 4
♡ Part 5
♡ Part 6
♡ Part 7 (You are here)

Greetings my lovies!

Welcome back to my blog, for the Seventh Annual AVBF Rugby Sevens Tournament Blog Series, where I am authoring my experiences during my visit to the Alpen View Brew Festival, and the accompanying AVBF Rugby Sevens Tournament, hosted within the beautiful Confederacy of Neu Engollon. This is my seventh article about my experience here, please check out the first six parts above first if you missed it!

After I finished writing Part 6 of my adventures (which of course detailed the story of how I celebrated the victory of the Port Emberian rookies, and their historic advancement to the Cup Quarterfinals, making friends with some of the most talented bloggers/podcasters in the business, and my first time experiencing Lisanderian grub & drink), I linked up again with my new friends, legendary blogger Graham O'Doherty, and podcasting geniuses Zane Anthony and Rick Gillingham (I have now posted both of their links to their sites at my Resourceful Links segment) to watch a few more matches, namely the Jumnian / Baker Park match, which was ridiculously epic. Rick, a native from Baker Park, nearly burst his kidney in anger, believing that the game was stolen in conspiracy. See, the final try which sealed the deal was executed by means of the Jumnian winger charging down the kick-out attempt, which forced the ball to bounce backwards (forward for Jumnia), which he snatched up and tried. Rick firmly believes it to be a knock, and it is possible, yet I firmly believe that the ball bounced off against his chest, thus making it not a knock. Either way, the ref felt it was above board.

Anyway, with Rick's anger not dissipating, I genuinely started worrying that a stroke was at hand, thus I kissed him on his cheek and dragged him from the fields. I took him to my home away from home - the tent of Ember Distilleries, where a lot of rumshots, Rumtopf Ice Cream waffles, and a warm Port Emberian crowd who treated him like family, seemed to do the trick, and soon he was as tame as a lamb once more. This girl still possesses that famous Port Emberian charm

Back to the fields we went, observing Abenfleft facing off against 69-X, which turned out to be a mockery of the beautiful sport. Let's hope the nation with the sexy number remains in the strip club, where they belong for the next tournament. As they belong anywhere but the holy field of green turf.

I was growing thirsty again at this point, with my voice barely being audible anymore, in no small part due to me screaming & cheering my heart out. It was worth it of course.

My thirst led me to resume my campaign of supporting every major brewer/distiller present at the festival, which led me straight to the Blackghár Meaderies tent, hailing from Jumnia, which was unknowingly yet extremely fitting and foreboding (more on that later).

Before we continue with the tale of bliss, allow me to share a small detail with you all about the Jumnian people. In antiquity existed a large civilisation, a proto-northern ocean people known as the Aquilonians, who resided on an island known as Jumne. These folk eventually commenced with mass migration campaigns, spreading all across the multiverse, but focused their energy mainly on three area's, areas known today as Port Ember, Sturgia and Jumnia.

Sometime after the mass migrations, a terrible volcanic disaster erupted, which sunk the entire Jumne island into the ocean, completely destroying the geographical area and the inhabitants who have remained. Thus, the remaining Aquilonians who have migrated in time, no longer had a 'motherland' to tie their identity to. The Aquilonians who were inhabiting the area of modern Port Ember were influenced by our tropical archipelago, whilst the Sturgian settlers were influenced by the rolling hills and grass plains, and the Jumnian Aquilonians were influenced heavily by their new arctic home. Over the centuries, a combination of the lacking of an anchoring 'motherland', and a large variety of social and environmental aspects (geography, climate, available food sources, available natural resources, interaction with nearby foreigners, trade, language etc), each chief migrant group started to form their own new and unique identities, shedding their Aquilonian heritage, replacing it with something new, yet still anchored to their past. This is how the nations and civilisations of Port Ember, Sturgia and Jumnia came to be.

Okay enough flaunting of my Anthropology background now! So, in short, I was very excited to dive into the culture of my ancestral brethren, and boy, was I not disappointed!

The crowd inside the tent was rowdy, very much so, not unlike the Port Emberian vibe, but perhaps a little more… barbaric? I can get behind that!

I got my hands on an entire platter of sampler meads, and I will be the first to admit that I have never been the biggest fan of mead (I'm a rum & beer gal), but I am pretty sure that changed instantly, as these guys have made me a believer! On offer they had Blackberry Mead, Sweet Mead & Dry Mead, but they also had more traditional beer, like their Lager & Stout. I am way too drunk at the moment to give you a taste by taste analysis of each individual, but I will sort you out tomorrow fam! But I will tell you that it's really quality stuff, and as you might know by now, I am quite the veteran expert of booze!

Anyway, after participating in an honest to fuck axe throwing competition, I managed to stumble to the next match - Port Ember Vs the Chicken Slayers.

I linked up again with the crew, where Graham schooled me on the historic significance of the (rubber) chicken sacrifice ceremony. I smiled softly as I listened, not trying to be rude, as I already knew the behind the scenes fluff. It was clear that Graham expected a horrified response from me - as most young and 'innocent' western girls would respond. It never came. See, I am not a normal lassie, for I am a Port Emberian. Allow me to educate you, dear readers, with a small anthropological lesson: Despite everyone assuming that Port Emberians are westerners, it could not be any more incorrect. Yes, we have adopted many western ideals, such as democracy, human rights, equality in law and personal liberty (although these values spanned from our pirating days funnily enough, but let us not go that deep for today), but we consider these traits as part of a modernisation movement, and not a western movement, as we still hold firm to our own unique culture, traditions and beliefs. And as a nation with some of the most bizarre religious beliefs and superstitions, a little chicken sacrifice does not scare us off. Now I would personally prefer to cook the delicious bastard instead of wasting it, but you know, each to their own.

Port Emberian Rugby 7's Debut Tournament: News from over there

Port Ember Vs Copper Cuprum

Port Ember 19 - 22 Copper Cuprum

Despite my heart breaking into seven thousand pieces, this was truly a top shelf match, both sides playing their absolute hearts out, a true nail biter until the very end. This is exactly what a top tier match should be like!

And just like that, our amazing, foundation rocking, underdog advocating, fairytale run has come to an end. I will be forever proud of what these debutant squad managed to accomplish. I was made proud of my country today.

So, even though Port Ember has been eliminated from the tournament by the world class squad of Copper Cuprum, I refuse to call it a day yet, as I have so much more to see and do still. Therefore I have decided to throw my support behind the nation of Jumnia, as they are my ancestral brethren, as explained earlier. This squad is iconic underdogs, making waves in this cup, despite it being their first attempt ever. They are currently competing for the AVBF Plate, and have just managed to defeat Lathamford with a final score of 28–12 in the Plate Quarters. They will now face off against none other than Baker Park - the very team who they managed to defeat, and thus literally stole their opportunity to compete in the Cup run. So, in short, it's going to be a very nasty (tasty) grudge match. I simply cannot wait.

The day's matches have ended, and I need to seriously drown my sorrows and stat. I need to go and find Graham and the boys now, as they are thinking that I have vanished due to our loss - but someone needs to teach these lads the perseverance of the Port Emberian party spirit. Tonight, the juice shall flow!

Till we meet again my lovies!

by **Neu Engollon** » Mon Oct 25, 2021 6:34 pm

Seventh Annual AVBF Sevens Tournament (2021 Edition)
Cup/Plate/Bowl Semifinals

Semifinals

Cup
Copper Cuprum 21–19 Elejamie
Nova Anglicana 19–28 Abanhfleft

Plate
Neu Engollon 24–10 Brookstation
Jumnia 24–19 Baker Park

Bowl
Sevendia 14–24 Licentian Isles
StrayaRoos 33–14 Arjunnagar

Final Fixtures

Cup
Abanhfleft v Copper Cuprum

Plate
Neu Engollon v Jumnia

Bowl
StrayaRoos v Licentian Isles

by **StrayaRoos** » Mon Oct 25, 2021 11:09 pm

The Roosian national Sevens team are Into the bowl final of the AVBF Sevens and are hoping to bring home the nation's first piece of international sporting silverware Against the Licentian Isles This afternoon (Night SDT) in Neu Engollon

works? · by **Abanhfleft** » Wed Oct 27, 2021 12:19 am

DISCLAIMER: Gaelic Gamers is an independent sports blogging website created by four cousins with a common liking and passion for sports of all kinds and is in no way or form affiliated with or organized by any official news organization in the Democratic Republic of Abanhfleft. All statements and opinions posted here are our own and not anyone else's.

Gaelic Gamers
Presents...

The Rugby Rundown (Sevens Edition!)
with Graham O'Doherty

7TH AVBF SEVENS: CUP SEMIFINALS (ABANHFLEFT)
Good God, it has actually happened. I don’t know how or why, but it’s happened anyway. Hello guys, and welcome back to another edition of The Rugby Rundown Sevens Edition with me, your gay Irishman Graham O'Doherty. After having survived the stern test that is the Jaguars of TJUN-ia, Abanhfleft are through to the semifinals of the Maracalo Cup of the 7th AVBF Sevens, where whoever wins the match against the Revolutionaries of Abanhfleft and the Lions of Nova Anglicana will face the winners of the semifinal against the Elephants of Elejamie and the Chief’s Chosen of Copper Cuprum for the right to lift the Maracalo Cup. Before we get too far ahead of ourselves, let us all take a moment to remember the path that took us here in the first place. It was not an easy path, I’ll tell you that much. After they were able to go through the previous edition of the AVBF Sevens undefeated, it was fair to say that a lot of fans, and maybe even the team itself, were expecting things to go exactly the same this time around. But then there was this little hiccup against Port Ember, the team of the home country of our new friend Riley Heglion (be sure to pay her Blog of a Crazy Nomad a visit and tell her the gay Irishman sent you, my lovelies!) and Abanhfleft ended up starting off the 7th AVBF Sevens with a 0-1-0 record. Not the worst for sure, but it’s not now you start another 8-0-0 campaign either.

But thinking back on it, maybe that draw against the Thunder Dragons was exactly what our team needed to maintain our defense of the Maracalo Cup. Overconfidence and underestimation are always very dangerous things alone, but when you put those two things together… oh, boy. An arson attack on a fireworks factory would have been less explosive than an epic Abanhfleft collapse in the AVBF Sevens, that’s for sure! Thankfully, it didn’t happen, and I really believe that we have Port Ember to thank for that. It doesn’t hurt that the Thunder Dragons were actually a good team for first-timers and gave the Revolutionaries a proper run for their money, especially when you compare them to certain other teams out there, cough cough. But it’s time to move on, and move on we shall to the Lions of Nova Anglicana. We’ve faced them a fair few times, we have. Sometimes we would come out on top and sometimes they would be the ones on top. I was about to say something about liking being on top rather than the bottom but I wish to keep this blog as family-friendly as possible, barring the few curse words here and there. Anyway, the last time we faced Nova Anglicana was in the semifinals of the 6th Rugby Sevens World Cup in Forsho, Grearia. As I seem to recall, we won what was ultimately a tight and hotly contested match, so here's to hoping that everything was going to end up exactly the same, from the tightness of the action to the final result of an Abanhfleft win.

And wouldn’t you know it, Abanhfleft did indeed win. The margin of victory may have been smaller this time around (just nine points compared to twelve in our Sevens World Cup victory) but of course, that made it all the more sweeter because our lads had to fight harder to claim the dub. Nova Anglicana were no pushovers, and will never be pushovers, which is why the Revolutionaries had to pull out all the stops just to get this win over the line. I’m sitting here typing this out on my tablet computer and I still get exhausted just replaying the memories of the whole game. It was that intense. But if just thinking about this game makes me exhausted, I have to wonder how the lads must feel considering that they were the ones that actually played the game. I can only imagine the huffing and puffing that they’re all doing right down while they recuperate in preparation for their Cup final match against Copper Cuprum. Yes, ladies and gentle-lads, after years of wishing for it, we finally have ourselves an all-Coalition final in rugby football. And to anyone who says that an all-Coalition final in a rugby sevens tournament just doesn’t have the same ring as it would were it to happen in either the Union or League World Cup can kindly get the fuck out of my blog. I will not accept any slander of rugby sevens in my personal space on the Internet! It may be quicker but I truly believe that it is just as prestigious as the older codes of rugby! And now that my little rant is over, let me just first congratulate my followers and fans from Copper Cuprum (I know you’re out there, guys!) for making it through to the Maracalo Cup Final. Let me also thank you all for knocking out Elejamie and making this first all-Coalition final possible (although part of me wants to face the Elephants yet again because of, you know, the rivalry and all). And now let’s wait and see if the Maracalo Cup will stay in Riuwiee, or if it will have to take a long, long plane trip up to Wa Deg. XOXO from Graham....

Nova Anglicana (19)
Try: St. John 2' c
Tremblay 5' c
Gorman 9' m
Con: (2/3)

Abanhfleft (28)
Try: Greathouse 3' c
Votaw 6' c, 13' c
Rakitic 10' c
Con: Reid (4/4)

by **Jumnia** » Wed Oct 27, 2021 3:50 pm

Blog of The Crazy Nomad

Blog Series: Seventh Annual AVBF Rugby Sevens Tournament.

♡ Part 1
♡ Part 2
♡ Part 3
♡ Part 4
♡ Part 5
Part 6
Part 7
♡ Part 8 (You are here)

Greetings my lovies!

Welcome back to my blog, for the Seventh Annual AVBF Rugby Sevens Tournament Blog Series, where I am authoring my experiences during my visit to the Alpen View Brew Festival, and the accompanying AVBF Rugby Sevens Tournament, hosted within the beautiful Confederacy of Neu Engollon. This is my eighth article about my experience here, please check out the first seven parts above first if you missed it!

After I finished writing Part 7 of my adventures (which of course detailed the story of how the Port Emberians had their dream underdog fairytale snuffed, the adventures with my new friends and my newly declaration of support to the Jumnian squad), I ended up at the Aleworks Breweries tent - which is coincidentally the final major brewer/distiller tent at the festival. So there you go, I have completed my challenge! Riley is the champion! (Unlike my Port Emberian Squad -cries-)

So the guys from Aleworks are Port Emberians (our country seems to be bloody everywhere within Neu Engollon this weekend), and are a fairly new face in the brewers industry, but they are rapidly making name for themselves, as they have basically mass produced crafts, whilst ensuring that their beers maintain a traditional Port Emberian twist.

I ran through their entire range, starting with their iconic and original Lilith Rose Lager - the beer which literally placed them on the map. This Lager has a distinctive, flowery, hoppy flavour and crisp aftertaste due to the slow brewing process. This is considered an exquisite, premium lager, brewed with malted barley, hops, water and Lilith Roses. That's right folk, Port Ember's national flower is used in this drink. How more patriotic can you get!? So, if you love your country, you damn well better go and grab yourself one of these rose beers.

Next I attacked their Emberian Pale Ale, which is quite a traditional EPA, with its characteristic reddish hue and hint of caramel taste. It's a smooth, easy to drink masterpiece. Unlike your standard EPA's however, it has a hint of spice, to, you know… spice things up.

The Aleworks Emberian Stout was next up for tasting, and it once again conformed to traditional Emberian Stouts, being completely black and containing lactose. Again, a hint of spice adds Aleworks' unique touch to this classic. It's bloody strong (10% abv), sweet and creamy. I mean, what's not to love!?

Aleworks Apple Cider was last in line, and I found it to be yet another classic with a spin. This beauty is made from 100% apple juice and then uniquely spiced with a hint of cinnamon. It's beautiful I tell you.

Once I was done with the tasting ceremony, my head was spinning violently, and I ordered one of the tastiest woodfired pizzas which I have had in ages, which I washed down with pints upon pints of that delicious rose beer. Pizza & Beer is arguably the greatest combination on this planet. As I finished up, I grabbed a chunk of Sekigilo (for my non-Port Emberian readers, it is a strip of cured beef) for the walk around the grounds. It is extremely tasty and packed with protein.

I made my way down to the main stage, where I caught the set of a band called Servonaris, who jams garage and surf rock. They are talented, fun, energetic and have beats for days. I obviously danced and banged my ass off from start to finish.

A band named Chrysalides popped up next, who are pop rockers. My ass continued to be rocked off…

Fast forward a few hours and I have found myself back at the festival grounds, sipping on an extra size black coffee, whilst shooting back espresso shots like one would do shooters on a birthday party. Yeah, I have not slept yet, yeah it is already the next day, yeah I have been drunk for 3 days straight (going on fourth) and yeah I am here for another day of enjoying great rugby. (Ps I cannot share my adventures of last night after leaving the festival grounds here, but I will perhaps set up a blog for the more.. strong willed readers…

)

I made my way down to the pitch, wearing jean-shorts and a newly acquired Jumnian Lightning Raven™ jersey, to spectate the Jumnia - Baker Park match. What was awesome about this match was the fact that it was about to be a proper grudge match. See, Jumnia defeated Baker Park in the group stages, with a very controversial and questionable try in overtime. The loss result was devastating as this was the sole reason that Baker Park missed out on the opportunity to contend for the Cup, and instead were forced to remain down in the mud - the Plate contest. And now… They meet again. Drama drama drama!!!

Jumnia's Rugby 7's Debut Tournament: News from over there

Jumnia Vs Baker Park

Jumnia 24 - 19 Baker Park

This time there would be no controversial overtime try, but it would be one of the toughest matches I have witnessed in a very long time.

Both sides played both their hearts and souls out, smashing each other into near submission, without quite reaching that point. The match was hotly contested and there was not a single minute where a clear victor was secured.

Hats off to both sides, as this is going into my Top 10 Legendary Matches of our time segment.

With this crazy match concluded, the hawkies will be facing off against the one - the only - the legendary - the gracious hosts - Neu Engollon, for the Plate Final.

The nerves are building up again...

I need a drink.

Till we meet again my lovies!

by **Neu Engollon** » Wed Oct 27, 2021 9:18 pm

Seventh Annual AVBF Sevens Tournament (2021 Edition)
Cup/Plate/Bowl Finals

CONFEDERACY PARK, BURGUNDEN
RUGBY EXHIBITION PITCH A

Copper Cuprum 12–24 Abanhfleft

Neu Engollon 19–28 Jumnia

StrayaRoos 35–14 Licentian Isles

AVBF Rugby 7's VII Everything Thread

The StrayaRoos national team is 17th!

Sevens Team into the Bowl Final

Who is online