Awesome/Funny NS Quotes (Not Your Own Quotes, Please!)

[The Archregimancy]

As stated by Nightkill The Emperor, founder of the previous thread, with a couple of minor additions....

We've all seen them. List them here!

Basic rules:
Memepics are not awesome quotes unless you made it
DON'T SELF-PROMOTE. By which I mean posting your own quotes. You can do one ego boost post, if it makes you happy, just don't be a prick about it.
DON'T JUST SAY "IN MY SIG".
DON'T JUST LINK TO A THREAD. Use the quote function and post whatever you think is funny.
USE CONTEXT. If a line isn't funny or awesome on its own, either explain the context or include the line or lines lines that it's in response to. Don't expect us to go chasing it down.

Thanks for Nightkill for giving me the go-ahead on this thread after it became clear that he didn't want to start another one.

Link to the first thread.

[Western Pacific Territories]

And then suddenly Bonaparte comes charging in with 50k tanks with laser cannons and all was well.

RIP feed.

[Big Jim P]

In short, because Mace Windu is a badass.

Was. He's street pizza now.

[Xmara]

He has a point, but it's like choosing between a turd and a slightly worse turd. On one hand, you have horrible dictatorships that oppress their people. On the other, you have fresh regimes that have already begun to collapse under their own weight and spread k
They're both still turds, but one is slightly wetter and smellier.

The most accurate description of dictatorships ever.

[Wisconsin9]

From Computer Keyboards in Your Nation:

Computfrs arf dieeicult too much eor our pfoplf, vfry rarf. Mostly kfyboard is mostly kfys in right position, but dieeicult for manueactorfr to put kfy in right spot. Lfad to problfms.

[Australian rePublic]

Brainwashing your children is unethical.

News at 11.

Only if you brainwash them to believe a deity. If you brainwash them into believing any form of religion is backwards deluded bullshit it's ETHICAL. *nod*

[Outer Sparta]

Ahh, World Series…

Fiesty Kansas City Princesses: Volquez and Ventura.

[Camelza]

This thread is about a hypothetical fish-hating religion and ethics of parental religious impact, please don't turn it into an abortion thread.

Let's have a compromise and make it a fish abortion thread!

What if a hypothetical religion bans the eating of caviar?

[The Alexanderians]

Context in th "How do you imagine the above player" thread I call the poster "libertarian kebab" he said this:

Liberal Pirogi

[Tinfect]

"I wish I were an Oscar Meyer weiner...."

"Well, good news for you, Jimmy!"

Context

[Imperializt Russia]

Everything became irrelevant there. There are psychological effects on going to prison no matter what.

The fact that the slippery slope is there doesn't mean we should grab a sled.

Somewhat self-explanatory.

[Anollasia]

Ooh, new thread!

Anyway, as a The Who fan:

The Who? You mean they're still around? Huh. I can't explain why a 60s rock band would know about processed meats and cancer anyway, but still. I'm a vegetarian, so I don't need to worry. For the rest of my generation, though, this will be worrying news. Perhaps they'll all have to find a substitute? But hey, look on the bright side- they won't get fooled again.

[The Alexanderians]

There are no women on NSG. If there were then I'd have to put on pants and that's simply unacceptable.

*stares*
Its fine you can keep them down......

[Saskisdi]

Ok, since we're coming out. I'm not really a cat!

*lets the cat out of the bag*

[Timsvill]

And they call Rubio a RINO... so Pataki has no chance whatsoever.

I've never heard anyone call Rubio a RINO once. I read Breitbart, watch Fox News, and make sure my shrine to St. Reagan is protected with my legally-purchased attack helicopter adorned by the American flag. And through all those things, I've never heard Rubio called a RINO.

[Western Pacific Territories]

Puz you're smart.

What do you think of my rifle and/or the cartridge?

Puz is just a little intern in a hospital that no one visits

[Swith Witherward]

Regarding posts making a player squeal, and IRC issues:

For good distractionage, find Dani.

Or you could just use WD40.

How could anything have over 2000 uses in a household?! I didn't think there were that many things you could do in a household! Although I guess they're including things that aren't technically related to the household, like bathing in ice-cream or serenading the ghost of Pierre Trudeau.

Swith, I, um, may need a while before I can join any IRCs. My computer's video-card is busted, so I'm stuck on my iPod until I either buy a new card or build a new PC. There seem to be a lot of apps for IRCs floating around? But the people reviewing them all seem to think they're attempting to replace their children with bog monsters, which is usually not a good sign. Bog monsters are pretty cool, but if an app has the power to abduct your children, it has the power to do other things, and I'm concerned about what they might try once they realize I don't have any.

[The Princes of the Universe]

Well, the Bible doesn't prohibit the consumption of alcohol.

If it did, it would make that whole water-to-wine thing a little out of place.

After all these years, we finally realized we got the translation wrong. Jesus turned water into Kool-Aid.

[Big Jim P]

It could be argued that the terms he and she are derived from sex, as opposed to gender. Dictionary.com defines the word he as "the male person or animal being discussed or last mentioned; that male." It defines the word male as "a person bearing an X and Y chromosome pair in the cell nuclei and normally having a penis, scrotum, and testicles, and developing hair on the face at adolescence; a boy or man." It could be therefore argued that a person who is biologically male but identifies as female should be referred to as "he", and vice versa.

I wonder if moderation would like to take this argument into account and re-consider its rules on the matter of misgendering.

Let me put it into another argument then: Privacy.

If someone says that they're a man or a woman, who are we to disbelieve that?

We're not aware of other poster's genitals (or their genetic makeup), and we'd like to keep it that way.

Emphasis mine.

[Idzequitch]

Well, the Bible doesn't prohibit the consumption of alcohol.

If it did, it would make that whole water-to-wine thing a little out of place.

After all these years, we finally realized we got the translation wrong. Jesus turned water into Kool-Aid.

I got quoted here? There really is a first time for everything.
Wait, for everything? Egad, what have I started?

[Gigaverse]

I got quoted here? There really is a first time for everything.
Wait, for everything? Egad, what have I started?

There's one first time I'll probably never get the chance at.

[Val Halla]

I got quoted here? There really is a first time for everything.
Wait, for everything? Egad, what have I started?

There's one first time I'll probably never get the chance at.

I am quoting you now. Spooky.

[Gigaverse]

There's one first time I'll probably never get the chance at.

I am quoting you now. Spooky.

A quote in the quote thread. That's rare.

[Tinfect]

Wait, for everything? Egad, what have I started?

A threadjack, apparently.
Back on topic, however;

Doom Legions Leader vs Lu Bu at Ultimate Maximum Rage Mode

18:00 / 06.00 PM

*Sponsored by PepsiCo*

I don't think obliterating little children is legal here.
/skip

[Saskisdi]

snip