A Tale Of Two Crescents - WC97 Roleplay Thread

[Elmyia]

The Beaucester Gazette
The Glorious Chaos of Group 13
It's still anyone's game - but who's favourites?

With just four match days out of 16 remaining, you’d usually expect a qualifying group to have winnowed things down slightly. In fact, in group 16 Saint Eleanor are already home and hosed as winners, in group 15 both automatic spots are tied up. In group 13, things are shaking out a little differently, with only 2 points separating 1st and 5th. With 3rd, 4th and 5th all having a game in hand it really feels like any side could prevail. We could just throw our hands up and leave it at that, but sadly, as Elmyia are involved, people seem to expect us to do punditry on it, so we’ll have a crack.

On Reputation

Going by reputation alone you’d believe that Mertagne and Elmyia were likely dead certs for qualification. Both have qualified for two World Cups in recent times, both recently regional champions, and both coming in with the expectation that qualifying to an expanded World Cup would be a cake walk. Having started with pairs of wins they could’ve been forgiving for booking their tickets already. Elmyia were disabused of this notion first, Oberour Ar Moro inflicting a first defeat and launching a transition into a campaign that has violently oscillated between feast and famine ever since. Mertagne returned to the top of the group after a couple of difficult results, but defeat to Brusseldorf then led to 1 point in 3, leaving them with no room ahead of the chasing pack.

Oberour Ar Moro, StrayaRoos and Aphrilia are all chasing a first qualification in a while, if ever. But all have taken scalps, all having beaten Elmyia at least once, but all gamely dropping points to each other, which is generous of them. All sit in that awkward bracket of solid, mid-ranking sides. There’s no doubting they all have some quality, but to date they’ve lacked that consistency needed to kick on, possibly until now.

On Form

Since the halfway mark
Pos.	Group 13		Pld  W  D  L	GF  GA    GD	Pts	PPG
2	StrayaRoos		  5  3  2  0	12   6 	   6	 11	2.2
5	Aphrilia		  4  2  1  1     6   8    -2	  7	1.75
4	Elmyia			  4  2  0  2    13  10     3	  6	1.5
3	Oberour Ar Moro		  4  2  0  2    11  10	   1	  6	1.5
1	Mertagne		  5  2  1  2	 7   7	   0	  7	1.4

Part of what has made this group so tight is the storming form of the sides that struggled in the first half of qualifying. StrayaRoos are undefeated since the halfway mark, registering some huge wins over Elmyia and Oberour Ar Moro. Yasmeen Karmea has been particularly helpful in this run, with her dangerous crossing coming to bear and upping their goal count. Aphrilia also looked to be putting on a run, marked by the solidity of their defence, until Elmyia swung violently back into form to dispatch them 5-1.

Group favourite Mertagne, meanwhile, come off the back of some horrendous form, including the aforementioned defeat to Brusseldorf. With only 7 goals in the last 5, questions are starting to be asked about their use of a front two and whether it provides the sort of attacking balance needed to pick sides apart. Often unwilling to commit their midfield with the same vigour as some other top nations, too often they’ve found themselves with two centre-forwards either lacking service entirely, or unsupported by those around them. They may wonder if the mercurial Trebuchet might be an option to start as a sole striker.

Elmyia’s own form is currently in the middle of the pack, albeit the two late, narrow defeats to OAM and StrayaRoos tip the scale somewhat.

On Strength of remaining opponents

Nation			MD 15		MD 16		MD 17 		MD 18		Computer Says They'll Get...
Mertagne		Aphrilia (h)	Elmyia (a)	Hispinas (h)	Bye		29.9
StrayaRoos		Lisander (a)	Brusseldorf (h)	Bye		OAM (a)		29.25
Oberour Ar Moro		Caerbannog (a)	Lisander (h)	Brusseldorf (a)	StrayaRoos(h)	30.55
Elmyia			Hispinas (a)	Mertagne (h)	Caerbannog (a)	Lisander (h)	31.05
Aphrilia		Mertagne (a)	Caerbannog (h)	Lisander (a)	Brusseldorf (h)	28.65

Well according to the computer at least, Elmyia do in fact have the easiest run in. Sure, it involves hosting Mertagne, but the difficult fixtures are otherwise out of the way (the fact Elmyia lost two of these is neither here nor there). Computer also expects the teams with byes to struggle, as well it might.

Ultimately though, things are so tight, and the remaining fixtures do little to separate out the pack. If Elmyia can get a result against Mertagne they should actually be a shoe in, but that would require the sort of consistency they’ve struggled for. One thing to note is there are a few fixtures left between the sides duking it out at the top. Aphrilia also face Mertagne, and StrayaRoos playing Oberour Ar Moro on the final day could still have a lot left riding on it. Based on how things have gone so far, would any of us have any real confidence that any of these will go to form?

So what do Elmyia need to do really?

With two spots automatically sending sides through, and the play-off spot below, really they only need to get their noses ahead of two of these sides. With the game in hand and three winnable fixtures, that shouldn’t be too much of an ask, the fact that it’s not possible for all of the sides to win all of their remaining games (given they play each other) is also incredibly handy.

So, in terms of what Elmyia need to do, it seems likely the worst case scenario for other teams having points (and presuming they lose to Mertagne) could look like this, with StrayaRoos beating OAM on the final day:

Pos.	Group 13	P  Pts
1	Mertagne	16  33
2	StrayaRoos	16  33
3	Oberour Ar Moro	16  31  
4	Aphrilia	16  31

So… Elmyia then would need 9 points from those other 3 games, which doesn’t leave a lot of wiggle room, but it is possible. Should they hold Mertagne to a draw, then 7 points from the remaining games would be enough. In reality though, 9 points from those 3 should seal the deal given the propensity for every side in this group to balls it up.

Anyway, we might as well nail our colours to the mast here and try and predict what will happen, so sod it:

MD 15 - OAM and StrayaRoos make short work of opponents already cut adrift, Hispinas somehow hold Elmyia to a draw leading to an enormous panic. Mertagne find their form again despite Aphrilia’s defence locking in after it’s horror show against Elmyia, let’s say… 2-1.

MD 16 - StrayaRoos continue their magnificent form and Aphrilia take a welcome break from tough opposition, picking up three handy points against the group’s whipping boys Caerbannog. OAM stumble to a draw against a Lisander side in an awkward mood, whilst Mertagne and Elmyia play out a pulsating 2-2 draw, leading to two sets of supporters spilling out into a mild Beaucester night feeling disappointed.

MD 17 - StrayaRoos put their feet up, OAM squeeze past a resolute Brusseldorf, Elmyia and Mertagne also win and… so do Aphrilia. No change here, but uncomfortable viewing for StrayaRoos fans. Still, that leaves them in second place with all the form, surely it couldn’t go wrong for them from here? Elmyia need other results to go their way as they host Lisander.

MD 18 - Elmyia spank Lisander, so they finish on 31 points and it’s over to teams elsewhere. Aphrilia are held to another draw to Brusseldorf, so their qualification campaign ends, allowing Mertagne to relax just a little bit. StrayaRoos and OAM look to be playing out a draw, 4 teams on 31 points, everything going down to tiebreakers… But then someone, let’s say Peire de Baingneus for the sake of argument, sticks it top bins. OAM through in first, StrayaRoos out, Elmyia through on tiebreakers and Mertagne in the playoffs.

Will it happen? Sod knows, just enjoy it.

[Edsmontik]

SECOND IN THE GROUP!
LIVE ON ISN NOW

The Edsmons had done well in their game versus Delaclava, but would they do the same against Hakushiya?
The team, like Delaclava, had no roster posted out.
Which means, the Edsmons have to go in blind and hope for a win.
Sticking with the same lineup as previously (except Aespana is in for Rehcikt due to injury), the Eagles will attempt their usual strategy.
With that, I'm Derouv Denehelders, and I'll be commentating this evening's match.

---

NS WORLD CUP - QUALIFIERS MD8
HAKUSHIYA HOME STADIUM, HAKUSHIYA
HAKUSHIYA VS EDSMONTIK

PRE-GAME
"Dammit, the trains are slow again." Bervaign sighs.
"It's only nine, don't worry." Fruedenne says.
The train finally comes to a halt at Lakeview, where the squad walks off and into the even more packed AirWayTransit platform.
After sitting and standing for about 45 minutes, a train finally arrives that is headed to Airport West and Beyond.
A Klaße 102 rolled into the station, with the words "AEREOVPVART WEẞD SHUTTZKLE" flashed brightly on the front board.
The red lights indicating it was an AirWayTransit shined as the train slowly came to a stop.
The doors opened, and passengers rushed inside.
It was so crowded that the Eagles thought they wouldn't be able to fit, but eventually, they got into the rear car.
After the warning beep sounded and the doors closed, they were off.
"Welp." der-Haans started. "6 stations to go. Terminal Q isn't too far away."

KICKOFF
The flight took a long while.
But now, Edsmons fans were slowly settling into the Hakushiyan stadium.
Cool air flooded into the stadium.
"OE! OE! OE! VDES!!!" the fans chanted.
If you asked any Edsmon why they were so happy, it'd either be that something really lucky happened to them, or Edsmontik won a qualifying match.
Javarqa jogged up to the referees, who shook hands with him.
The Hakushiyan captain was also there.
Javarqa took a few breaths as the young referee flipped the coin.
He imagined qualifying on their World Cup Debut.
It seemed so impossible, yet they could be second if they won this game.
There were 17 groups.
Since 48 teams would get in, some third-place teams would count.
If the Edsmons could even get third or second, they'd be happy.
No need to win the whole thing.
Javarqa shook himself back awake, listening as the referee told the Hakushiyan captain that their team would be starting.
He jogged back, still dreaming about the opportunity to be on such a big stage.
It'd be a challenge.
"I want to be able to lift the world cup for Edsmontik someday. For Karma." he said to himself.
The Hakushiyan striker stood right at the ball.
The referee blew the whistle.
*TWEEEET!*

FIRST HALF
A strong pass had the ball at the midfielder's feet.
Aespana moved, preparing to intercept a possible pass to the winger.
But instead, the midfielder sent the ball to the center back.
And once he received, Hakushiya went full defense.
Clearly, they had seen the Edsmon games.
The Hakushiyans held possession in the two-man midfield, and once in a while brought the ball back to the five defenders.
Over the following minutes, the Edsmons were unable to eve retrieve the ball.
"We need to attack; we can't do anything if we just wait for the ball to get to us!" Javarqa says.
All it took was one slip up by the Hakushiyans.
But they held strong, silencing thoughts about an easy win.
The Eagles watched as the Hakushiyans continued holding back the ball.
"Just push! Who cares about yellow card, foul, or whatever, just push!" Utravak shouted.
All of the Edsmon attack and midfield went in.
Aespana went in for a strong blow.
He tackled the ball right away from the right-wing-back, before running down the wing.
The Hakushiyan fans suddenly silenced.
Aespana moved past a center back.
He dribbled towards the center.
He reels his leg back....
"It's a fake shot! Everyone's been fooled!"
Aespana instead passes to Stuero, who winds up his leg...
"We've been fooled again!"
The Hakushiyan goalkeeper had just made two dives against fake shots.
Stuero then fired the ball into the opposite corner, hoping for the early lead.
But the goalie was too fast on his feet.
The ball was punched right out for a corner kick.
Aespana sighed, jogging over to the corner to pick up the new ball.
Fans from above waved "#18 AESPANA!" flags as high as they could.
Reus Aespana smiled.
He set the ball down, tapping it lightly with his right foot.
Thinking back, he remembered the Taya-Frielandi side of his family.
And his younger brother, Reuen.
But he shook the thoughts away.
"No daydreaming, that's for after the match." he said to himself.
With a few quick steps, he fired the ball into the box.
Javarqa jumped, followed by the Eagles and the Hakushiyans as well.
The ball bounced off of Ghreksbvy and bounced right towards the goal.
The Hakushiyan goalkeeper dived.
Thoughts rushed through every head.
Utravak came in, attempting to kick it in.
The Hakushiyan defenders moved to cover the goal.
Utravak fired the ball.
Heartbeats pulsed.
And the ball...
*PING*
Comes off the crossbar.
The fans have a large collective sigh.
"It's only the 20th minute anyway." Aespana thought. "I hope in the end I can actually start a game."
The minutes tick by, with Edsmons grabbing a few corners and chances.
The Hakushiyans have still yet to make an attack.
The Edsmons speed ahead, crossing the ball in and sending multiple shots to goal.
But the Hakushiyan goalie was just like Loch Dearg's, strong and unwilling to let any goals in.
For the following 10 minutes, Stuero alone had four chances.
Two had deflected off the defense, one had been caught by the goalkeeper, and one hit the post.
It seemed pointless to even continue.
And as the 40th minute neared, it seemed even more pointless.
But when Aespana's shot went out for a corner, the Eagles had some hope.
Back at the corner, Aespana stood in the warm spring air.
He tapped the ball twice, checking if it was deflated.
He backtracked, keeping his hand raised until he ran up.
A powerful shot sent the ball into the box.
Javarqa missed his header.
A Hakushiyan defender failed to clear it.
But with the last bit of hope for the first half, der-Suiozkeafter came in fast.
He fired it.
The ball soared to the corner, barely missing a defender.
And it tucked itself neatly into the net.
"GOALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!"
The fans erupted, shouting screaming, and playing their loud brass instruments.
They sang the anthem, "Oe Icht Vdes".
der-Suiozkeafter sprinted across the field, waving his arms and calling for the fans to sing louder.
And then, it seemed as all in unison, the Edsmon fans were singing the beautiful anthem together.
The instruments joined in, creating the music that the Eagles cherished.
And it only ended when the referees called them all over to restart the game.
The rest of the minutes passed fairly quickly, with two minutes of added stoppage time.
Right after, the sound of the whistle arrived.
*TWEEEEET, TWEEEET, TWEEEEEEEEET!"

HALFTIME
The Edsmons sat around, reviewing the game in silence.
"Well guys, nice job out there. You coordinated a large attack that also defended well so that the Hakushiyans didn't even get a chance! But it is most likely because we are playing more aggressive." der-Ghavyr said.
"Coach, when will we be getting game time? You've barely changed the lineup." Syverark said.
"Well, I'll try to get you guys some game time in the following matches." der-Ghavyr responded. "Oh man, time goes by quick! Alright team, get out there and defeat those Hakushiyans!"

SECOND HALF
Edsmon fans were loud.
The Hakushiyan fans, not so much.
In the center, Utravak placed the ball down.
During the halftime period, the Eagles had discussed ways to tire out the Hakushiyans without tiring themselves out.
Utravak still didn't understand too well of his role, but he decided to do it anyway.
His job was to lure defenders.
While he was drowned in thoughts about how he'd do this, the whistle blew.
*TWEEET!*
Utravak shook himself awake and passed the ball to Stuero.
The Hakushiyans stayed defensive as usual, but it seemed as if they were trying harder to keep the ball out of the defense.
Stuero sprinted down the wing, dodging a midfielder and the wing-back.
He used his footwork to slide past a defender but lost the ball to another.
The defender fired the ball up to the center.
Ystermakt moved with the striker, pushing him so that the ball wouldn't get there.
The ball flew over the two, landing near Javarqa.
Javarqa sent the ball to der-Suiozkeafter, who hesitated for a moment.
"What do I do here...pass it to Jervanois or initiate an attack? he said to himself.
After a second of deciding, he kicked the ball far up the field for Wejikaj.
He could hear the striker say "dammit" after the ball was cleared.
Next to him, Javarqa was calling out to the rest of the team.
"Go! Yes! Get open guys!"
Mavkrav thought for a bit again.
How was anyone supposed to hear anything?
But they seemingly listened and found themselves open for a chance.
"Come on, let's go up. We have a corner." Javarqa said.
That made der-Suiozkeafter feel blind.
How did he see that far?
From where he was standing, no way would he have seen the ball barely go out.
der-Suiozkeafter shrugged it off and followed Javarqa.
Not too long later, the Eagles were in the box waiting for Aespana to take the corner.
"Well, you have a good eye." der-Suiozkeafter tells Javarqa.
"Thanks." Ivikt replies.
Aespana took the corner, sending the ball to the far side of the box, where Utravak attempted a volley.
It was a strong ball, but his left foot just wasn't good enough.
And so, the ball flew right over the crossbar and into the stands.
The Eagles sighed.
No second goal for them as of now.
Minutes 50-60 went by in a breeze.
But right after, the Hakushiyans had made their first proper attack on the Edsmons.
der-Stoiuben was almost unable to save a powerful driven shot by the winger.
But with the good reaction, he was able to punt it out for Kizani to clear.
But in no way were the Hakushiyans giving up, because they initiated another attack.
After Wejikaj slipped on the grass, the winger took full advantage, dribbling as fast as he could down the wing.
Kizani attempted to stop him, but a cut inside took Steus off balance.
The winger made a short pass to the striker, who fired a powerful ball- only to be blocked by der-Suiozkeafter.
A few other times from the 60th to 70th minute the Hakushiyans had chances.
But whatever they did, the Edsmons doubled and hit harder.
Stuero fired a few left-footed shots, and Aespana did the same but with his right.
Both players put themselves at an angle, hoping to test the keeper enough that he gave up.
But the Hakushiyan goalkeeper held strong, reminding the Edsmons of how much of a pain it was to get past Juvencus in the 21st IAC.
Edsmontik died off without scoring a single goal that entire group stage.
If you asked any of the players, they would have said that it was a good learning experience.
But the truth is, they shudder remembering it.
Utravak, Wejikaj, and Ghreksbvy also had their fair share of chances, with one of Ghreksbvy's shots nearly going in.
Without much else happening, the game sort of died off.
The Edsmon and Hakushiyan attacks slowed, and for the following 20 minutes, it was just the sound of Edsmon fans.
Brass instruments, drums, and just people.
The Hakushiyans stayed strong in the end, but did their "good game" handshakes by the 90th minute after stoppage time was added.
And that was exactly how the game ended.
*TWEEET, TWEEEET, TWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET!*

---

KEY MOMENTS
37' GOAL der-Suiozkeafter (EDS)

EDSMONTIK WIN WC97QMD8 VS HAKUSHIYA

---

OOC: For the following RPs, since I am very, very behind, I will be posting them for two matches, and they will not cover the entire game like this one. Instead, they'll be just commentary and interviews. Once in a while, (If I can) I will be posting RPs similar to this.

[Oberour Ar Moro]

Lucky Group Thirteen
Five teams, four matchdays, three spots up for grabs

After the final whistle was blown on matchday 14 for Group 13, the sporting world paused to look at the table and had pretty similar reactions.

"Group 13 is crazy"
"Bloody hell"
"Group 13 is anyone's game"
"Every time I look at those standings, Group 13 looks more and more unbelievable"

And the sporting world is absolutely correct. The group leader Mertagne is tied with StrayaRoos on 24 points. Oberour Ar Moro and Elmyia are tied for third with 23 points. In fifth place sits Aphrilia on 22 points.

Five teams within two points of each other at the top of the group. Even sixth and seventh in the group are mathematically within shouting distance of the playoffs. (Maybe. We're writing a semi-professional sports blog. If we had done well in math, we wouldn't be here.)

While noting that Elmyia's The Beaucester Gazette has run some numbers as well, New Game would like to look at each Group 13 nation in turn, considering their World Cup ranking, group position, recent form, and their remaining matches in qualification, and speculate on what comes next.

Caerbannog

Ranked: Unranked
Group Position: 9th
Form in last five matches: LLLDL

Next Four Matchdays:
vs Oberour Ar Moro
at Aphrilia
vs Elmyia
at Hispinas

By Matchday 4 Caerbannog had taken hold of last place in Group 13 and had not let go, only just earning their first points of the qualification campaign. Their draw came long after they were eliminated, indicating there is still some pride in this side. They have four remaining opportunities to make their mark on World Cup 97 qualification, mostly by taking points from other sides. Oberour Ar Moro is the first that needs to watch out for this potential stumbling block.

Lisander

Ranked: 151
Group Position: 8th
Form in last five matches: DLLWL

Next Four Matchdays:
vs StrayaRoos
at Oberour Ar Moro
vs Aphrilia
at Elmyia

After a bye and a draw Lisander were officially eliminated from either qualifying directly to the World Cup or going to the playoffs. The only consolation will be potentially serving as a spoiler. And with matches against four of the group's current top five, they will have plenty of opportunities.

Brusseldorf

Ranked: 134
Group Position: 7th
Form in last five matches: LLWDW

Next Four Matchdays:
Bye
at StrayaRoos
vs Oberour Ar Moro
at Aphrilia

We don't think it would be grossly unfair to say that Brusseldorf are probably hoping for a Cup of Harmony bid to arise if they want to continue playing football after Matchday 18. But after their upcoming bye they have a real chance to make a mark on qualifying. Emus, Dragoons, and Anchors beware.

Hispinas

Ranked: Unranked
Group Position: 6th
Form in last five matches: WWLWL

Next Four Matchdays:
vs Elmyia
Bye
at Mertagne
vs Caerbannog

On 16 points, Hispinas would need to win their three remaining games to even sniff the playoffs. And everyone ahead of them needs to drop all the points they can. But would anyone be surprised if they could manage to finish this qualification run with three straight wins?

Aphrilia

Ranked: 82
Group Position: 5th
Form in last five matches: WDWLW

Next Four Matchdays:
at Mertagne
vs Caerbannog
at Lisander
vs Brusseldorf

Aphrilia's mighty defense looked almost impenetrable throughout qualifying. They surely thought that if the opponents can't score, they can't lose. But then Elmyia showed them what Oberour's always knew: That offense is the best offense. The Anchors need to rebuild that defense, stat, if they want to climb into the top three.

Elmyia

Ranked: 32
Group Position: 4th
Form in last five matches: DWLLW

Next Four Matchdays:
at Hispinas
vs Mertagne
at Caerbannog
vs Lisander

Group 13's pot 2 team may have the easiest upcoming schedule, and a full complement of four matches to work with. If there was ever a time to put it all together and string together some results now would be it. But the Elmyia press has despaired over their capacity to drop games they shouldn't. If they want it, they will need to earn it.

Oberour Ar Moro

Ranked: 78
Group Position: 3rd
Form in last five matches: LLWLW

Next Four Matchdays:
at Caerbannog
vs Lisander
at Brusseldorf
vs StrayaRoos

The Dragoon's scorching start has cooled. Over their last five matches only Lisander and Caerbannog have scored less points. Oberour Ar Moro have a match in hand over the first and second place sides in the group, and two matches against the bottom half of the group. However there are many, many millions hoping the Oberours do them a solid and drop some points. It's to be seen if the Oberours will be so generous.

StrayaRoos

Ranked: 60
Group Position: 2nd
Form in last five matches: DWWDW

Next Four Matchdays:
at Lisander
vs Brusseldorf
Bye
at Oberour Ar Moro

Say hello to Group 13's form team. With 11 out of a possible 15 points on offer since the halfway mark, StrayaRoos have climbed from fifth to second. Their last four matchdays will be tricky. They have an ill-timed bye and two away matches against qualification rivals. But if their form holds steady they should be more than fine.

Mertagne

Ranked: 16
Group Position: 1st
Form in last five matches: WWLDL

Next Four Matchdays:
vs Aphrilia
at Elmyia
vs Caerbannog
Bye

The team that, by World Cup ranking, should be on top of Group 13 is. One point in the last three matches, though, has kept them grounded. They also have an unfortunate bye on Matchday 18. They'll need to win two six-pointers, while not giving Caerbannog a historical highlight, to return to the World Cup.

[Hapilopper]

Nathan Ellis Field at Capital Stadium, Hapilopper City
The most recent World Cup 97 Qualifying Match - 404 ERROR: SCORE NOT FOUND

So, bear with us a bit. Usually when we write these stories about the matches or a surrounding narrative, we’ve got page after page of notes here with us. But two things happened: First of all, some moron spilled beer all over our notes and ruined them last night when they were watching pro wrestling. Second, a lot of the traditional information we get from the matches were ruined thanks to some of the wildest weather we’ve ever seen for a football match, and thanks to a power outage shorting out a lot of the computers at Capital Stadium. So be a little patient with us.

Either way, we think - and we say we think - the Haps were playing the Cheetahs and Reptiles Coalision, which was significant because that was the first opponent the Haps ever had some 14 years ago when the played in the Baptism of Fire. And we do know that the Hapiloppians won the match and that they lead their group - at least, we hope they lead their group. But come 15 minutes into the match, all hell broke loose. That’s when the big storm rolled in, turning the stadium into a quagmire and a deluge all at once. The radio and TV broadcasters had to close their windows in a hurry so they wouldn’t get rainwater into the booth and ruin their equipment. Camera crews had to cover their equipment.

And then, lightning struck the stadium, knocking out half the lights and shorting out all the computer equipment. The match continued, somehow or another. Even more surprising was the fact the match continued while fans in the stadium suddenly heard sirens. And people watching television were subject to this.

(OOC: This one’s dedicated to the former NSSer that threw a temper tantrum the last time I tried something like this in 2019)

“THE DOMINION WEATHER OFFICE IN HAPILOPPER CITY HAS ISSUED A TORNADO WARNING FOR... MOST OF HAPILOPPER CITY... UNTIL 8:15 P.M. LOCAL. A LINE OF SEVERE THUNDERSTORMS CAPABLE OF PRODUCING A TORNADO WAS LOCATED OVER DOWNTOWN HAPILOPPER CITY AT 7:45 P.M.

LOCATIONS IMPACTED INCLUDE...

THE STADIUM DISTRICT, NATHAN ELLIS FIELD AT CAPITAL STADIUM, PRINGLESIDE NEIGHBORHOOD, HENSLEY PARK, BARRETT-WATERS NEIGHBORHOOD, THE WEST RIVER, CONYERS, HAPILOPPER CITY INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT CONYERS.

TAKE COVER NOW!

IF YOU ARE AT CAPITAL STADIUM, PLEASE SEEK YOUR SHELTER IMMEDIATELY!”

The problem is, apparently, nobody at Capital Stadium got the memo. The phones were knocked out. Television service was knocked out. Internet was knocked out. So the match continued as an enormous storm rolled on past. Thankfully, a tornado did not touch down over the stadium, although one did hit the Barrett-Waters Neighborhood in Conyers, leaving some downed trees, flipped cars and busted windows.

In the stadium, there was a bigger problem. A reporter tried turning his computer on, only to get electrocuted as he hit the power button. Televisions were going haywire, concession stands couldn’t sell their goods and fans found themselves getting free burgers, beer, popcorn and everything in between. And fans trying to watch the match outside of the stadium were having one hell of a time trying.

Inside the stadium, fans and players were having way too much fun. We’ve heard stories about the Hapiloppian players celebrating a goal by sliding on the artificial turf, sending water flying through the air everywhere. We’ve heard something about a couple of jokers smuggling those fun water guns into the stadium and spraying anyone and everyone they could - either in the stands or on the field. There was the poor security guard that stood directly under a drainage pipe, not realizing until it was too late that he was in a bad spot.

And then there was Thom Perkins, seeing a river of water come his way, telling an assistant to get him a bucket. When he got the bucket and filled it with rainwater, he decided to have some fun with it, throwing it on the field. Unfortunately, he would up throwing most of the contents of the water on the referee, who stopped play, turned around and saw Thom laughing his ass off at the situation.

Thom was lucky to not get ejected.

When the match ended, half the lights in the stadium were still out. People were enjoying the free beer they had gotten from the concession stands. It seemed like the fans still in the stadium were a little drunker and a little wilder than normal. Some fans ran out onto the field and did slid on the artificial turf, bringing some police to run after them - hilariously failing in the process.

Either way, the Hapilopper-Cheetahs match was a spectacle to see. If only you could have seen it on television. But we’ve heard there were other strange glitches across the multiverse that messed up other matches... does anyone know about this?

[Tero al Disco]

STORY OF MY LIFE PART 5 - BRAIAN RICO

Braian Santiago Rico, b. 1999 in Laiquén, Auguria.

We've gone over Sergio Cervantes' hometown of Brisco, in the deep eastern ends of the country, and now we're going to do another criss-cross, this time to the Terense shores. The National Route 5, which as we've mentioned before in Cervantes' episode, stretches from the southern city of San Miguel upwards and does pass through Laiquén, ending in another big Terense city like Casuarinas. The province of Auguria is one of the northernmost provinces, a title it shares with the provinces of Inticuna, Casuarinas, and the Norte province, all of which form the northern borders of Tero al Disco. The surface of the province of Auguria itself is mixed, with the farmlands that stretch out from the south reaching its end point, the western plateau and also the ever-hotter and ever-wetter northern plains that start here, and stretch northwards.

However, Laiquén, off its location in the coast, also serves as one of the main fishing cities in the country, with the capture of wild anchovies, hakes, trout and shads having an important role in the city's industry. Moreover, due to its location on one of the most important rivers in Tero al Disco, the Augurio river (named as such after the first settlers considered its location as a sign of good comings), makes it mark the end of the southern plainlands and the start of the northern ones, with its surroundings featuring a considerably fertile soil due to the regular flooding cycle of the river, with the Augurio system originating from other rivers in the more highland provinces of northeast Jarsurúa and Inticuna in the Terense northeast, before meeting in the "main" river some few hundred kilometers east of Laiquén, and then finally flowing into "Terense Sea". Eventually, the access to fertile farmland and the sea would lay the foundations for the city to grow.

In the sphere of Terense sport, Laiquén (and the province of Auguria as a whole) is somewhat famous for one club: Hermandad y Patria, a club who have consistently been of the best in the country in the three big indoor sports: basketball, handball, and volleyball. Despite this, their football division has never had any sort of trajectory in the highest circuits. In the days of the regional leagues, they could aspire to do well in the Auguria league at times, but they were never able to go for the big leagues. As of the time of writing, they are currently competing in the Categoría B, fifth tier of Terense football, with the team limited to playing only teams from the province at that division.

This correlates with a pattern across football in Tero al Disco and the provinces in the "Deep Interior", where there are hardly any clubs in the top divisions (second tier and above), partly due to the centralised system that Terense football runs on, but that all the provinces produce countless great players that end up playing in the best clubs from Tero al Disco Capital...and it looks like Braian Rico isn't an exception to that rule.

Braian Rico was born in the year 1999, to parents that were occasionally short on cash, like many other of the best Terense players...so I guess that isn't much of an issue to talk about here. Nacional de Laiquén, the city's best football team, was having its golden years, as this would be their third season in the second division of Terense football, the Nacional B; in 1992, after federalisation of Terense football, the best teams from every province were invited to play in one of the top two newly-formed national leagues, after being limited to only clubs from the capital for almost a century now. With the Auguria league being one of the lower-ranked provincial leagues out there, Nacional were invited as the representatives of the province to play in the Nacional B. In '92 they'd finish in the midtable, but in '93 they'd finish last. Some seasons later, and in 1998, they won promotion back from the third tier. The next two years would see a somewhat similar performance: in '99 they'd have a solid season, but in 2000 they'd go down in a slump.

That is why, in the spirit of Terense fan culture, (and a point which has been stressed on in this series), most fans in the interior of Tero al Disco would pick one of the big clubs from the Capital to support. In Braian's case, his dad was a deep Nacional Terense fan, and his son would definitely be inculcated to support the red-and-yellow club from the capital until the end and not, say, his birthplace's own Nacional, named after the former club.

At age seven, he'd join Nacional de Laiquén's youth setup straight away, looking to bask on the glory of eventually playing with the red shirt and the yellow sleeves down south one day, by...already playing with a red shirt and yellow sleeves. He was naturally egregious, somewhat aggresive, and liked to goof around and not bother anyone, so he already had the a bit of the personality required for a good Terense player in general. And although he was doing wonders at keeping the goal, the technical aspects, he was too short to be considered by others to be a worthy goalkeeper. Rico's youth coaches tried to make him switch positions many times, but he refused. "When I was a child, me being a goalkeeper was written in the stars. I adored, but I adored Oscar Siegel," referencing Nacional's legendary goalkeeper in the 1990s and 2000s, "and I wanted to be like him when I was older."

When he was 15, his dream was about to come true, as Nacional offered him to try out (which is something that I've never talked about in this series for some reason) for the club. After having done his trial in Capital, he was eventually rejected because of his lack of height. Later his grandmother told him: "Grandma Josefina told me that, if I wanted to grow to become a goalkeeper, I'd only do that if ate eight eggs a day...and so I did. And later I realised I was growing like lightning, like a giant."

At 19 years old, and measuring 1,77m, he'd finally make the cut. He would make his professional debut with Palestino, probably the best club reasonably close to Laiquén, as Tino resided in the city of Casuarinas. However, instead of a club with the prestige like Nacional Terense, Palestino were instead fighting for survival in the top flight, a division where they're accustomed to doing just that. This year, though, his Palestino side would instead be relegated to the second tier, with Rico having played only a handful of matches. In those few matches though, he'd show his impressive ability to save the ball, and the major clubs were back on his tail. In next season's Nacional B, with Braian being the main goalkeeper, Palestino would have a strong defensive showing, but they'd end up only three points away from the promotion playoff.

By season 2022 he'd be quickly snapped up by Norteño, and it would be in 2022 that Norteño would hoist the league title, their sixth and last one as of writing this, and Rico wouldn't be off the cards as one of the key players for Ñeño in that season. Next time round, however, his performance would drop a tad, and either way Norteño would not manage to successfully defend their league championship. In 2024, thanks to a classic bureaucratic mishap, he would be registered as playing for Norteño, but in practice he would end up playing for Tacurú, lower down the table. Tacurú would have a great start to the season, especially Braian himself, as they'd concede only 8 goals in 15 matches. In the second half La Menta Granizada's season would fall off, and they'd end out of contention for even the Terense pre-Confederations Trophy playoffs.

Nonetheless, at goal he'd play a major role in the Teros reaching winning 3rd place in Baptism of Fire 83, as he conceded 6 goals in the 9 matches. Later on, in WCQ96, he was superseded by Moncloa's Andrés Castillo as Tero al Disco's goalkeeper, but now, having joined Sylestone's Halpenley United and more important things than that, he's now regaining some of his old footing in WCQ97.

[Patriotlandia]

Undersea cable damaged: Patriotlandians find themselves at the mercy of a single point of failure

People across the nation woke up to find an internet outage that lasted for more than a day. Netizens were unable to reach their favourite websites and businesses, schools and government services were all impacted. Experts say an issue with the undersea cable connecting the nation to the rest of the world was the root cause for the outage.

This article was brought to you buy the all new, redesigned, Renard Gizmo.
Now available with standard adaptive cruise control, back up camera and optional hybrid powertrain.

"It's really not something you see often. The cables are well protected, but usually something like a repeater can fail. It's what helps keep the signal strength over the long distances", says Jasmin Trépanier, professor at the University of Port-la-Ville. "I'm surprised nobody had a backup quickly available. It is something that should be looked into". It is worth noting that internet infrastructure became privately owned a couple decades ago with the Republic divested it's shares of the state owned PatrioComm company. "Usually, you would see the free market build alternatives, bringing the price down with competition". It is unclear why no other company has built their own network and public records don't show any permit being issued for such a project since the last PatrioComm expansion in the 90s. The National Communication Council did not reply to L'Étendard citing internal policies with ongoing investigation.

Meanwhile, citizens all over the nation were affected, Jean Leprusse, a restauranteur in Cap-la-Chance, was left blindsided after all his computer services were offline. "I thought they were all companies from the island, but I guess not. Reservation, food orders, shift scheduling, all of it was gone". After multiple claims from other clientele, L'Étendard found that multiple service software solution companies pretending to be based in Patriotlandia were actually originating overseas. "I'm not surprised, people here take pride in using local goods and services, but this really hurts our trust of these companies and the authorities. How long as this been going on?", Leprusse added.

Services were back up and running as of time of writing, but questions have started to be asked about the fragility of these indispensable services and the nation's reliance on outside technologies. Such concerns are unlikely to be quelled without answers.

[Kelssek]

“Have you never heard the proverb, ‘tis better to cancel a fan appearance and be thought a dickhead...”

“I know...”

“...than to show up drunk and remove all doubt.”

“You’re right, I made a mistake...”

Calen Reamsey looked at the contrite expression on Titan’s face. He had to remind himself the guy was only 24, though most everyone casually thought he was about four years older because he’d already made a name for himself and come to be seen as a fixture of his national and club teams as a teenager.

A draw against Mytanija was okay, all was square, still in a qualifying spot, denied them two points as much as we’d lost two. But then, a draw against Ile de Richelieu. That is definitely two points lost, and with the tricky position the start to the qualifying phase had left Kelssek in, things had immediately snapped back into full blown crisis. In other circumstances a player struggling to make it through a publicity event might have been brushed off with excuses and likely stories, as most children (one hopes) don’t really know how to tell someone is a few sheets to the wind anyway.

And Titan had not been plastered or anything, as social media was making it out. He’d been seen drinking more than one mojito in the beer tent minutes before going over to the fan zone to smile and wave, which he’d mostly accomplished. It was asking him to sign bits of clothing for the next hour which had been more difficult, and had he really been unable to understand words and slurring his own, or was that simply the inane pump-up music at the street festival was so loud everyone had to shout?

But “DRUNK footballer yells incoherently at children as Kelssek headed for STUNNING qualifying failure” was the story now, and they’d have to live with that.

Tonight’s TV highlights
9:00pm, KBC1 - HOUSE OF THE SNAPDRAGON TV-MA
105: Bearnaí Baoil – Faulty wiring threatens to scupper Greg’s plans. A security breach leads to terror in the karaoke lounge. Rhaenyra escapes from the cannibals and threatens to take credit for the new phone launch. The cousins quarrel over who to blame as the chatbot goes rogue.

[Commonwealth of Baker Park]

Bees stumble, still control own destiny
Scott McCrae
The Daily Mail Chief Soccer Writer

The Baker Park National Team saw their 10 match unbeaten run—and nine wins in a row, the longest streak overall since AOCAF 66 and the following Eagles Cup 13 & longest in WCQ since the WC 85 cycle—come to an end with a 1-0 defeat against Tumbra on matchday 13 at the Eagles Club in Straton.

The Black Eagles pulled to within 3 points of the top spot in Group 8 with the victory, but saw their opportunity to leap past BP with their loss in the following fixture, while the Bees were unable to capitalize on that result as they lost by the same scoreline in Newmarket against Riena.

Baker Park still have a match in hand over Tumbra as the nations will have their byes on the final two matchdays—BP will face Adab on MD 18 while the Esportivan side will have completed their fixture list on MD 17—although they will have only Delitai as the final home match of their final three contests while traveling to Of the Holy See and closing out at the Adab City Stadium in the finale looking to clinch a place in the Finals after a two cycle absence.

With the top two nations in every group advancing automatically and the top seven third placers avoiding a playoff, BP look to be in a position of strength despite the losses; prior to the last pair of fixtures, the Bees were 6th in the overall point standings, and the chasing pack in Group 8 still have head to head matchups against one another—Tumbra will face United Hawkland and Zenic at the next international break while that pair both still have to face an improving Riena side who also have Adab at home in their next match. If Baker Park can come away from the trip to Of the Holy See and the match against at home against Delitai more than six points ahead of fourth place, they should theoretically be home free for a trip to Pasarga or Eastfield Lodge.

Lineup vs Of the Holy See MD13

Rossi; Frost, Kucera ( C), Flannigan; Park, Garfield, Morgan, A. Boyle; Grayson; Coleman, London
subs—Dickerson, Schulman, Morris, Taylor, D'Alessandro, Douglas, Kirby, Phan, Khan, Hardison

Lineup vs Delitai MD 14

Cotterill; Milner, O'Connor, Jones; C. Logan, Ryan, Vetter, Altman ( C); McDavid; Hardison, Khan
subs—Dickerson, Schulman, Morris, Andrews, Martini, D'Alessandro, S.Logan, Riley, Cohen-Abdullah, Ikiedieze

[Captina Island]

Captina to face group leaders in need of points
The Captina Company Press Association

The Captina Company National Team are seeing their hopes of making it to the playoff for World Cup Qualifying slipping away in spite of the 2-0 win over Carribba.

With Huaryramica hosting the Rosso e Oro the chances that the national side can take enough points over their final four fixtures are getting smaller; the final run in against Libesia and Al-Tamaghza at home and a trip to Langenia should be a matter of regaining the form that powered Captina to 7 of 9 points at the end of the first half of qualifying, but scoring has gotten difficult once again, the last match not withstanding.

On current form within the group, getting the maximum from the final three opponents will not be enough to boost the total from the 17 points the Rosso e Oro sit on at the moment to one of the top three positions in the table.

Adding insult to injury, Loch Dearg--the nation that Captina faced in a friendly prior to this tournament, winning 4-0--are currently sitting in the top three in Group 16, having only conceded 6 times through 13 matches.

[The Ko-orenite Constellation]

And finally - for now - Uruashoren. Hard to navigate territory and a spread out population have made it difficult to establish connections at first, but technology has done wonders in bringing together a rugged people. And it turns out there are more in the territory than expected: nearly two and a half million is the most recent estimate, making them immediately one of the larger powers of the Constellation, though they're behind in some key areas. In fact, that's why they joined the Constellation: protection from a world economy ready to pick them apart. And while the Uruashoren economy relies partially on remittances, those funds are sent from better protected economies in the Constellation than cutthroat businesses in less equal places. Since joining the Constellation, the territory's population has dipped but seems to have stabilised since, and a few budding sectors are springing up as well.

In a few years, they've entrenched meritocratic ideals going back to their older political systems, and while technology is definitely a part of daily life, Uruashoren has decided that it shouldn't take centre stage in everything. In a sense it remains one of the more conservative members of the Constellation, but most others have had a multi-decade head start. That said, core government functions are established and good to go, resulting in a strong foundation to build the rest of the nation on. Decision making and then communicating said decisions has gotten significantly faster, from weeks to mere hours.

Economically the territory is behind and a long-term strategy is being implemented: the steep mountains will no doubt hold earth's treasures, but is mining worth it? Or is tourism a more stable income trickle into the future? As it stands, quite a bit of the country is still geared towards the old way of doing things: runners and rest stops to connect towns along the many mountain roads and passes, small-scale agriculture. There has always been a healthy exchange of ideas but it simply fails to keep up with the rest of the multiverse.

The government has a seat in the city of Huancarayu, but that's often not where visitors enter. Tourists either enter the network of carefully maintained trails from southern and high-up Pucuta, eastern accessible Ruruchaypi, or the small town of Yanqataq on a group of deceptive slopes. Airplanes can come in as well and they land near the other city of Uruashoren, Cochapuca.

---

The league's sixteen teams almost always get their thirty games per team in, despite weather conditions, long travel times, and so on. Usually, teams from outside the two cities just come into town to get their home-and-aways in: yes, small town teams often opt to just play their home games away as well. With five teams from Huancarayu and three more in Cochapuca, you can get half your season done in two short visits, which opens up the rest of the year to get those difficult trips in to smaller places like Intiquilla, Rayutuna, Sachallañakuna, and so on. The result is that teams from the big two cities have a far easier time with the extra nearby people and the huge amount of home games.

The big rivalries are all within cities: Qapaq Ñan are the big name from Huancarayu, and their games against Chaski Huancarayu and Tambo Huancarayu are the most tighly contested. In Cochapuca, Chaski Cochapuca versus Tambo Cochapuca is an equally big game. The only other town derby is Pucuta versus Chaski Pucuta.

*  Sinku hayt'ay         Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Cochapuca              30   20   7   3    72   42  +30    67
 2 Chaski Huancarayu      30   17   7   6    57   32  +25    58
 3 Huancarayu             30   17   4   9    61   44  +17    55
 4 Chaski Cochapuca       30   16   6   8    47   32  +15    54
 5 Amawtakuna             30   15   6   9    66   38  +28    51
 6 Tambo Huancarayu       30   14   9   7    60   42  +18    51
 7 Tambo Cochapuca        30   13  11   6    47   34  +13    50
 8 Pucuta                 30   15   5  10    60   50  +10    50
 9 Qapaq Ñan              30   12  10   8    55   41  +14    46
10 Sachallañakuna         30   11   6  13    48   57   −9    39
11 Chaski Pucuta          30    9   8  13    49   53   −4    35
12 Intiquilla             30   10   5  15    29   41  −12    35
13 Rayutuna               30    9   5  16    37   45   −8    32
14 Chacracaya             30    4   9  17    30   67  −37    21
15 Yanqataq               30    2   7  21    30   70  −40    13
16 Ruruchaypi             30    2   3  25    27   87  −60     9

In fact, this season it takes until 8th to find the first team not from the big two: Pucuta. If we look for our first team from one of the smaller towns: yes, that's Sachallañakuna, in 10th, only beating out Chaski Pucuta from a larger place.

[Crpostran]

---

[*]NOTE: ALERT & LETTER TO S&T govt. sent here after discussing it with Siovanija & Teusland. Images on Pg.3 contain panels of Japanese manga Blue Lock. Regatta refers to the ongoing Saintlake Regatta & Water Polo Grand Prix,a non-RP event, thus posting results here. Signatures created with onlinesignatures.net. Hoping the forum outage issue is resolved soon. Sayonara!

[*]EDIT: Apologising to the community over the fact that no score-cards could be created/uploaded. Having a rather hectic time irl.

[Katzeburg]

Josef Brand was shifting nervously side to side - today was a make or break day for him and the KFF.

The discussion in Katzeburgian parliament had been brutal. A motion to have Kerr imprisoned outside of the legal process was put forward by the nutjobs from the Katzeburg First party, who claimed that the entire scandal had ‘brought not only great shame to our glorious nation, but sullied the sport of football and the beauty of railways across the globe’ only to then double back and say ‘not that it matters what that view is outside our country as why would we want foreigners caring about what we think?’

The xenophobia sparked a bit of fracas in the chambers, leading as many confrontations in Katzeburgian parliament does, to a bit of a fist fight between the small Katzeburg First contingent and the Katzeburgian Greens members, resulting in a full chamber clearance before the matter could come to a vote.

This threw the media machine into overdrive - suddenly Josef was fielding multiple calls and emails a day from outlets across the country to get interviews with KFF members while also being constantly berated by numerous media teams for Katzeburgian MPs to get an understanding of just what the KFF was going to do.

“He’s fucking resigned already, what more do they want?” Marvin said one day after Josef briefed him in on the unfolding disaster. “Just tell em to fuck off and go back to the journalists with our stock messaging - Kerr did a great job as head of the KFF but is no longer involved, we are reviewing blah blah blah that kind of crap.”

The whole thing had the country distracted from the on-field results during the qualifying process for the World Cup - so distracted that the media didn’t even make a note of Katzeburg’s matchday 14 result against Darkmania, which left the side down in fourth place after being overtaken by Sarzonia.

With only four games left in the qualifying cycle, Marvin finally decided to change tracks.

“Brand - get Haberkorn on Goal before our next two games alright? We need her to come out and defend the KFF and the support we’ve shown during this process, and bring people back into giving a shit about the team ahead of the must-win qualifiers.”

“And what support have we shown?” Josef enquired.

“Oh look, just give her something about keeping the team sheltered from off-field distractions or some garbage - get them talking more about the actual football rather than everything else!” Marvin snapped.

Josef did as he was told - a quick phone call to the KBC studios and one week later Haberkorn and Brand were sitting in a small studio in Katzestadt waiting for the journalist to come in.

Brand was looking down at his feet, just waiting for the whole thing to be over, but he needed to be on high alert - they’ve been made to look like mugs by KBC once, a second time could be fatal.

“So what did Kerr actually do?” Haberkorn said, almost as a way to break the silence.

“Wait, you don’t know?”

“We were deep in national team planning when it all broke, so I’ve not really seen much of what it was all about.”

“He was super corrupt, basically used his powers as MP to influence the government to cut out some towns from the railway because they were looking at joining the national league next season.”

“Right. What towns?”

“Windorf and Coalbrook?”

“And that’s what this is all about?”

“Pretty much.”

“I’m surprised to be honest - Windorf is a bit of a shithole anyway so being skipped by the trains is probably doing everyone a favour there,” Haberkorn puffed out.

“Well, maybe don’t say that when the journalist comes in, just in case.”

Five minutes later and after a brief conversation with his cameraman about blocking, Otis Huffman, KBC’s leading sports journalist, plonked himself down opposite Haberkorn. He looked dishevelled, as if he hadn’t been home in days and was one additional story away from making it onto the front pages himself.

“Becka, lovely to see you again and thanks for your time today, how is the mood in the team camp at the moment?” Josef was taken aback, Otis jumped straight in to the interview with absolutely no pleasantries - should he be worried?

“Yeah, it’s a bit mixed at the moment that’s for sure. The result over in Darkmania was not what we wanted and leaves us in a really tight position for the final run in,” Becka said. “With our last four games all against teams around us in the fight for qualification, this run will absolutely define our standing as a national team.”

“So you aren’t expecting much from the final four games?”

“That’s not what I mean - it’s obvious that sides like Gnejs and Sarzonia are quality sides, and while we’ll be keen to get some revenge over Gnejs for that 5-1 win they had over us earlier in the campaign, we need to be aware that this is our first world cup cycle and just having been in the qualification discussion for this long is a huge achievement.”

“Will having players like Lloyd Field and Meriel Arkwright back for the final four games be a big step in the right direction then?”

“Absolutely - both were back for our game against Darkmania as I’m sure you would have noted, but they weren’t back at top speed. I’m hoping with a bit of extra time under their belts, they’ll be raring to go.”

Standing just off camera, Josef took a deep sigh of relief - so far so good, he thought.

“Obviously this campaign has been bright on the field, but do you think the off-field challenges faced by the KFF has dampened the success?” Otis asked.

“Look, I think we’ve been a bit lucky that our results have been able to speak for themselves for the most part and it’s been clear there’s been a bit of separation between the two. Has it helped? Not at all. I think the team has been rather sheltered from it thankfully, but things do get through and it makes it tough to keep morale and chemistry together when there’s constant discussions about whether the team will last past this cycle.”

“Has that been mentioned to you? That the team will be gone by the end of the cycle?”

“It’s something which has been mentioned in the media, with no national federation we might not have the remit to play internationally, but the federation has been great at supporting the side so far, so I’m taking it with a grain of salt.”

Good ol’ Becka, Josef thought. She’s done really well since she was appointed out of nowhere to be a calm, level-headed person in the set-up - sometimes the only one. I’m glad she’s up there on camera rather than me, I wouldn’t be able to handle it at all.

“It’s interesting you say that, as the federation has been rather quiet to media outlets about what it intends to do now Kerr has resigned - it’s used the same messaging for any response or just ignored questions flat out, do you think there’s an element of hiding its head in the sand?”

Josef snapped back to reality - Focus! Focus! This could be turning.

“Not at all,” Becka shot back. “They’ve been really clear internally about what is going on and we are all joined up which is what we need ahead of this tough run in.”

“Well, you say that,” Otis said with a hint of menace. “But we actually also have someone from the KFF in the room with us for this interview,” he said, turning to look at Josef.

“Josef Brand, why don’t you grab a seat and join us for a few questions?”

Josef gulped. I’m not paid enough for this, he thought to himself.

[Edsmontik]

A GOOD THEN A BAD THING WITH STEUS KIZANI AND MAARTIN STUERO
LIVE ON ISN INTERVIEWS NOW

Following the 3-3 draw against 26th ranked Xanneria (Which I, former Edsmon Fustbaaler Emkitte Vylrik AND interviewer was absolutely happy about) and the 0-0 draw against Hetaru, the Edsmons have a lot to think about.
How did they have to much energy in the Xanneria game, yet so little in the Hetaru game?
Well, we brought in Steus Kizani and Maartin Stuero to tell us what he can about the two games on Saturday, April Tenth of 2029.

---

ISN INTERVIEW ROOM #9
SAUFENHEIM, NORJFLALIKE, SKEJIVER
4/11/2029

Steus: Hello Emkitte! Thanks for inviting me today.

Emkitte: No problem! So today, we'll be discussing the previous two games, against Xanneria and Hetaru. What are your thoughts?

Maartin: Well I have to say, the Xanneria game was tough and exciting! But the Hetaru game, it was as if we lost all of our energy.

Steus: I agree, we defended well but couldn't land anything into the net. We're lucky to still be in third place after those matches.

Maartin: There are some team problems, but it is only fatigue and that der-Ghavyr isn't switching up the Edsmon lineup enough.

Emkitte: I see, and that's what's fatiguing you guys?

Maartin and Steus: Yes, exactly!

Emkitte: Alright. So, any other main thoughts about the Hetaru and Xanneria game before we move on?

Steus: Well, I feel like the Xanneria game had way too many uncalled fouls. Such as when Fotserr was tackled after he got substituted on. Additionally, when Javarqa was elbowed by that defender as well. But we also should have gotten yellows. Like when der-Struvos clipped the striker's ankle, or when Makanvakt bodied that midfielder.

Maartin: I agree. And I think the Hetaru match was horrible as well, too many cards handed out for bad reasons. der-Suiozkeafter was shown a double yellow and red after a small bump into the Hetaru striker and following that, a dive from the winger.

Emkitte: Alright. Let's move on, what do you guys think about the upcoming Saint Eleanor and Loch Dearg games?

Steus: Honestly, I think we may do horrible against Saint Eleanor. But if we can, we'll grab a draw.

Maartin: And as long as we aren't too worn out, we can win the Loch Dearg game and possibly move up the table.

Emkitte: Any thoughts about each team?

Maartin: Well, I'd say it's not at all easy to beat Loch Dearg's goalkeeper, who proved superior in our last meetup. But Saint Eleanor, one side is usually sleepy, which means we can take advantage.

Steus: I agree, as der-Ghavyr did say we will be changing directions for attacks a lot during the Saint Eleanor match.

Maartin: Hey, remember when that one group, meeting whatever said that acertain defender on the Saint Eleanor side was better than Ivikt?

Emkitte and Steus: (laugh) Ha! Can't forget that.

Maartin: (laugh) And how Ivikt ended up elbowing that player down during a corner? Remember when he told us "Totally on accident with a smirk on his face!"

Emkitte and Steus: (laughing)

Steus: That is one thing I won't forget. But I don't want to get so happy, the Eleanorians probably will humiliate us.

Emkitte: You're not wrong. They might.

Maartin: If we hold strong though, we may just break through for both games.

Emkitte: Has der-Ghavyr said anything about the lineup?

Steus: Yes, since der-Suiozkeafter is out with a red card, M. Reichsteur will be starting.

Maartin: He also said that a lot of player that havent started will be playing in the Saint Eleanor match.

Emkitte: Hopefully it goes well for you guys! And that's all for today! Thanks for joining me on Inter Sports Network Interviews!

Steus: Anytime pal, thanks for inviting us!

Maartin: See you soon!

Emkitte: Have a nice day folks. And that's it for this afternoon's broadcast of ISN: INTERVIEWS!

---

MATCHDAY 9

KEY MOMENTS
38' GOAL Young (XAN)
43' GOAL Wejikaj (EDS)
55' GOAL Burnes (XAN)
77' GOAL Stuero (EDS)
80' GOAL Haddix (XAN)
84' GOAL Wejikaj (EDS)

---

MATCHDAY 10

KEY MOMENTS
20' Yellow Card der-Suiozkeafter (EDS)
32' Yellow Card Stuero (EDS)
39' Yellow Card Hetaru RB (HET)
43' Yellow Card Aespana (EDS)
60' Yellow Card Hetaru CM (HET)
62' Red Card der-Suiozkeafter (EDS)
68' Yellow Card Hetaru RW (HET)
81' Yellow Card Makanvakt (EDS)
85' Yellow Card Reuhans (EDS)
90' Red Card Hetaru CB (HET)

---

MATCHDAY 11-12 LINEUP

---

"IT WAS PAINFUL SEEING US FALL SO QUICKLY" IVIKT JAVARQA SPEAKS WITH EMKITTE VYLRIK
LIVE ON ISN INTERVIEWS NOW

Two game changed how Edsmon fans felt.
In Touve and Austranviige, the largest footballing community was completely silent.
It seemed as if they had lost most of their hope for upcoming games.
So today, I, Emkitte Vylrik will interview Edsmon captain javarqa to ask about what went wrong these past two games.

---

ISN INTERVIEW ROOM #4
DOELSENBERG, BORDVARDETR, NORTHEVIIGE-TRETOVIKENHANZ
4/13/2029

Emkitte: Welcome Ivikt! It's nice to see you this morning.

Ivikt: Hello Emkitte. I'm happy to be here today.

Emkitte: So following the two games yesterday, what are your thoughts?

Ivikt: If I'm honest, we were horrible out there. We got humiliated once again by the Eleanorians, and we just couldn't put anything past Loch Dearg.

Emkitte: I see. Anything else?

Ivikt: I'd say our stuff requires a lot of work. The wing-play tactic is being stopped more and more, and with Kizani out for injury, things aren't going to look very good for us Edsmons.

Enkitte: Definitely, so what will you and your team be doing now that two players are out injured?

Ivikt: We are having less and less chances to do anything, and if we keep up the injuries, then we might as well call it quits for a chance at the world cup. What will we do? It's mostly just readjusting the lineup.

Emkitte: What about your view on Syverark's red card? Do you think it was too harsh or not?

Ivikt: I think that Jaak probably deserved it. Sure, the tackle wasn't that harsh, and Lankiv ended up saving the shot, but seriously, he got away with multiple fouls in the first half against Saint Eleanor.

Emkitte: Alright, alright, anything else about the two games before we move on?

Ivikt: Well... I'd say that Loch Dearg is a strong opponent. Their goalkeeper sort of holds the entire team up and that's mainly why we couldn't land anything in. We have to practice other tactics besides wing play to beat them.

Emkitte: Okay! So will you be focusing on these things when captaining your squad?

Ivikt: Definitely.

Emkitte: Alright, so now, let's move on. Any thoughts about the upcoming match against New Fernia?

Ivikt: I'm confident that we can regain our traction and win ourselves the game. If we can't then something's off and we have to review it. But for sure, we will be watching out for our opponents and making sure that all is good.

Emkitte: What about Hurricane Bernisq? Do you believe it will affect anything?

Ivikt: (sigh) I have family in Woodhill, but they've recently moved due to the hurricane warning yesterday. This hurricane is big and may interfere with the flight to New Fernia. Hopefully it doesn't and we can get on with the game. But if there's a nationwide outage because of it, that may ruin everything for us. No ATC, no go.

Emkitte: Okay. Any other thoughts about anything else?

Ivikt: There's lots of things that could go wrong in the New Fernia game, but we really do hope that we can just pull through and muster another win against them. Our bad performances recently have driven the fanbase mad. I mean, they've made jokes too! Millions of likes and hearts or whatever people call them. It's funny and all, but sometimes the people take it too far.

Emkitte: Wow, that really sucks for you guys, especially if the internet jokes are made in hate.

Ivikt: You are correct.

Emkitte: Well Ivikt, that's all for today! Thanks for joining me.

Ivikt: You're very welcome! See you around!

Emkitte: Well folks, that's all for today's broadcast of ISN: Interviews! Stick around for match reviews and IBN storm coverage.

---

MATCHDAY 11

KEY MOMENTS
18' GOAL Lawson (EXT)
25' Pulled Hamstring Kizani (EDS)
34 GOAL Pilchard (EXT)
50' GOAL Woodward (EXT)
52' Red Card Syverark (EDS)
54' Yellow Card Makanvakt (EDS)
61' GOAL Reuhans (EDS)
79' GOAL Quatro (EXT)
86' Yellow Card Curran (EXT)

---

MATCHDAY 12

KEY MOMENTS
20' Yellow Card Javarqa (EDS)
57' Yellow Card McDaniels (LOC)
81' Yellow Card Ghreksbvy (EDS)

---

MATCHDAY 14 LINEUP

---

HURRICANE BERNISQ HITS EAST COAST OF EDSMONTIK
IBN RADIO


"The warning was sent on the 13th of April. It was the 14th of April when the majority of the public began to do something. A hurricane warning, so early in the year, how is it possible? Bernisq is larger than what would be expected. The 14th of April was not a time that hurricanes were supposed to form. But following the ridiculously hot weather and strong winds, that sort of made sense. Really though, two months from hurricane season? Many people thought it was fake. But then weather reports proved the hurricane's existence, people went haywire. Already, the partially warm east coast of Edsmontik fueled winds. The thing was headed towards four key states. People were running around, packing bags and getting on trains out of the cities. Officials, senators, and important people were evacuated quickly. A hurricane this early was impossible. Or so people thought. At the large train stations, people were crammed inside. Large capacity transport trains stopped every now and then, stuck because of traffic. No one was getting anywhere.The hours ticked by. Many people in areas to be impacted were able to escape. Some decided to stay behind. Edsmontik would be forced to ban flights out of the impacted areas and near those areas about 10 hours before landfall. They weren't risking people's lives by putting them on an airplane that would fly through the storm. Things weren't any calmer outside though. On April 15th, the winds began picking up. The sky got darker, and rains began coming in. Thunder. Lightning. Some thought that it'd go away, but it only got worse. The Eagles were lucky to be in New Fernia. Waiting for the game. Winds roared and screamed as trees began to be pushed around. This wasn't fake news. People finally realized. But it was getting too late. Floodwaters came in. Winds howled; weaker houses collapsed. Cars began to move. Trains still stationed at their stations were beginning to creak. People were being pushed around by the winds. "It's not possible" they all had said. But they were completely wrong. Only three-hours in at northeastern Viikraust and northern Veconne, floodwaters had risen very high. Large areas had power outages. Trains were starting to sort of lift up off the rails. The winds only got stronger. The rest of that Sunday was full of chaos. Six hours in, Veconne lost power. Seven hours, Viikraust lost power. Eight hours, Jaakston was hit by the hurricane. Water had risen to two-and-a-half stories. But something went completely wrong later that afternoon, as power in other states drained out. And then just like that, it was a nationwide power outage. It didn't reach all states, but after a few hours, and on the 16th, all states were impacted by the outage. All power was out. There were frequent thunderstorms and rainstorms across the country now. People who were watching IBN and other Storm trackers suddenly lost connection. Lights in Edsmon stadiums and in offices shut off. From space, you could see the lights just disappear from Edsmontik. No one knows anything about the outside world now, and the Eagles who have just played New Fernia are stuck in New Fernian Hotels due to cancelled flights. The hurricane is still moving, but it's dying down. We hope to rebuild the eastern coastline someday after Bernisq is over. That's all we know as of now, I'm Darname Visqen of IBN over wireless radio. Thank you for listening in and stay safe out there. Once again, I'm Darname Visqen of IBN Radio."
*click!*
Javarqa shut the radio off.
A long time had passed.
He leaned back on the couch, and looked at his teammates, who were just enjoying dinner.
The hurricane sounded too fake.
It wasn't possible this early.
But it happened anyways.
How unlucky the Edsmons were.
As anyone else would have noted, a tropical storm in April was a four-leaf clover.
But a whole hurricane?
"What's harder to find than a four-leaf clover..." Javarqa mumbled to himself.
"A five-leaf clover. No, a seven-leaf clover. Nine or ten leaves even."
Stuero walked over.
"Anything new?" he said.
"Other than I forgot the score of the game and we can't get back?" Javarqa said. "No. Nothing at all."
Stuero sighed, finishing the last of his meal before speaking again.
"If only we could get back. But not internet, no electricity, and everything's damaged in the east." Stuero said.
Javarqa scratched his head before throwing his own meal out.
"You know," he started. "It's not too bad here. But I miss the Sußerarenæ. I miss the fans. Well, some are here, but then they can't really get back either and they can't call their family... It's pretty upsetting to see how many of them just want to go home."
Stuero sighed again.
"Yeah. But no internet here. I can't find the results of our group or anything. We should have had about four more games by now." Stuero said.
"You aren't wrong. Is there an internet outage everywhere?" Javarqa said, scrolling on his phone.
He pressed the "Games" button on the NSWC97 official website.
After scrolling for a bit on the calendar, he got to matchday 13, which was a bye for the Eagles.
He scrolled a bit more, and found Matchday 14.
But instead of results, he was met with a piece of text.
404 NOT FOUND
He scrolled more, and checked out the 15th, 16th, 17th and 18th matchdays.
404 NOT FOUND appeared on all of them.
"We didn't even play the 15th and beyond." der-Haans said, walking over. "But we should have. But we couldn't."
"Thing is, no other team has results here. Which is very unusual." Javarqa said, tapping the screen.
He refreshed, but the same message kept popping up.
404 NOT FOUND
Alright, let me try ISN.
404 NOT FOUND appeared on the 14th and beyond games for Edsmontik.
"Still there?" Stuero said, confused.
"Well streggvalkligges.eds has information about Edsmon games, it has to work out." Javarqa said.
"I'm going to bet it doesn't work." der-Haans quickly added.
404 NOT FOUND
Javarqa refreshed once again.
404 NOT FOUND
And again.
404 NOT FOUND
"Ivikt, calm down." Stuero said.
Javarqa stopped, sitting down and setting his phone back into his pocket.
He sighed.
And it was silent in the cafe of the hotel.
"We're not going to get in contact for a while." Javarqa said, ending the silence.
"And we just have to deal with it." said Stuero.
"Goodnight, guys, I'm off. It's way too later to be doing this." der-haans said, charging off towards the elevator doors.
Not too long later, Javarqa sat on his bed.
"I hope my family is okay." he thought to himself before laying down and heading off to sleep.

[Indusse]

OOC: The Copyright message at the end of the post has been used from the standard copyright message from multiple books.

LexiRead™ > Web Edition

Close [x]

---

The Half Blood Saga I
Chapter II
Echoes of the Past

---

Previous Chapters:
Chapter I Part I
Chapter I Part II

The next morning, Adael woke up before dawn, his mind still stuck with the revelations of the previous day. He lay in bed, staring at the ceiling as Miha stirred on her perch. "You're up early," the Quetzal observed, her voice sounded as if it was in concern. "Trouble sleeping?" asked the Quetzal. Adael sighed. "How can I sleep, Miha? Everything I thought I knew about my life... it's all changed."

He dressed up quietly and slipped out of the house, careful not to wake his family. The streets of Fararah were empty in the pre-dawn light, save for a few early risers preparing their market stalls. Without really thinking about it, Adael started walking towards the town library. It was housed in an old stone building, its windows dark and shuttered. He sat on the steps, waiting for the librarian to arrive.

As the sun appeared over the horizon, Ashear appeared, looking worried. "I had a feeling I would find you here," she said, sitting beside him. "How are you holding up?" Adael shrugged. "I don't know. I just... I need answers." The librarian, an elderly man named Thoran, arrived soon. He raised an eyebrow at the two teenagers but unlocked the door without making any comment.

Inside, Adael and Ashear started looking up old maps and history books, searching for any mention of Jehnara or Adael's birth father. "Look at this," Ashear said, pointing to a faded illustration in an ancient tome. It depicted a shimmering city nestled in a mountain valley, surrounded by lush forests. "Is that supposed to be Jehnara?" Adael asked, leaning closer.

Thoran, who had been watching them curiously, spoke up. "Ah, the fabled city. Many have sought it, but none have returned to tell the tale." Adael's head snapped up. "Do you know anything about a man who left to find it about twenty years ago?"

The old librarian's looked at him. "There was one... a skilled warrior named Ethran. He was obsessed with finding Jehnara. Left behind a pregnant wife and everything." Adael's heart raced. "That must be my father. What else do you know about him?" Thoran shook his head. "Not much, I'm afraid. He kept to himself mostly. But there were rumors..."

"What kind of rumors?" Ashear asked. The librarian lowered his voice. "Some said he had a map, a secret route to Jehnara. But if he did, he took that knowledge with him when he left."

As they left the library, Adael's mind was buzzing with questions. He barely noticed where he was going until Ashear grabbed his arm. "Adael, look," she whispered, pointing down the street.

To be Continued...

---

Copyright © Akiho Banwari.

All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

http://www.lexiread.org

[Zenic]

"So, do you think it's time?"

Emperor Cuauhtémoc had dreaded this conversation for a while now. His Minister of Defense, Premier General Brynhildur Marcela, had been concocting a few plans for the last few years that the Emperor had reviewed on various occasions but always denied. "And we're sure this is unclaimed land? None of our lake neighbors have legal recourse if we go ahead with any of these proposed plans, General Marcela?" The General sighed awkwardly and remained silent until she was ready to speak.

"As far as we can tell, no." The Emperor slammed the thick manila folder in his hand onto the desk. "That's not good enough!" The Premier General was not prepared for that reaction. She knew that the Emperor wasn't that enthusiastic about her plans but this was never in her projections of this meeting. "You've been researching these plans of yours for years and the best you can come up with is 'As far as we can tell?' Are you serious? We are still in the process of revitalization and you want to half-ass a land grab that may cause an international incident? Specifically, one where WE would be the ones at fault? Deservedly too. Did that EVER cross your mind even a little?! What that would do to our people and their moral?"

"We need more land if we want to accommodate the larger population size we're aiming to return to. Especially since the ZSF were partially fighting because the land distribution before the conflict left large swathes of citizens with the bare minimum in resources. You want to avoid a repeat of that? This is how you do it." The Emperor groaned. "I am aware of that. We've done some land redistribution already, at least as much as we legally can, and designated some of that said land as property of the Emperor to ensure they will only ever be used for growing crops to feed the masses. I understand it won't be enough eventually but that's the best we can do working with what we have. We can only move so fast else we risk leaving some kind of gap open that will allow another internal conflict. Did you even bother to check if there are any people or tribes already living on those lands?"

"We've sent out some reconnaissance units out to both targets. So far, they've located a few remnants of human existence but no active presence. Basically, people who used to live there but moved and became the ancestors to one of any of the countries in the area or vagrants and survivalists who want, or have to, live off grid. No one who could make a legitimate claim of that land as their 'home', per se." The two remained silent for a few seconds. "It's perfect for what we need, sir. The time is"

"ENOUGH!" A needle drop could be heard throughout the floor of the Emperor's office. Some workers claim they heard the yell from the other wing of the building. "Here is what we're going to do. You will coordinate with Boriss, Swithin, and Fina. See how feasible it is to get settlements set up on those lands and how quickly as well as how much it will cost. Ascanio will set up some meetings to discuss those lands with his counterparts in the Gatchingerrak Union, Vaugania, and New Ponyville. He will ensure there are no last minute claims from any of them. We may have to give up a piece of land here or there but if we truly need this land, then we pay their price. I will speak with their respective leaders the next time Rushmore gathers for regional talks as well for extra confirmation. Effectively, I will leave nothing to chance. We just got back into the international scene: the last thing we need is to immediately shoot ourselves in the foot. But none of this happens until Maxene and the Ministry of Domestic Affairs does a THOROUGH investigation into whether we can even attempt to do this or if it'll stretch us too thin."

The Premier General motioned to speak. "And that is final. I will notify you once I get the report that gives either the abort or the green light on these plans. Understood? Nothing happens until I say so." The Premier General nodded, stood up and saluted. "Yes sir." The Emperor exhaled. "You are dismissed." Brynhildur Marcela turned and marched out of the Emperor's office. The Emperor simply remained seated at his desk, contemplating just how wild the future of this role may get if his other ministers came to him with such ideas.

And if he was truly ready to deal with them and any consequences that may occur.

[Saterun]

An Exploration of Saterun Tactical Identity: Part 3
By Kalvin Hsemer

In Saterun, the most idolized position has long been that of the central attacker, whether that be a striker or (much more rarely) a centre-forward. Most of Saterun football's early stars were strikers, and they always dominated the tabloids. But I'm not here to discuss individual players, although a few will turn up later in the article. My main purpose is to reveal how the role of Saterun's most cherished position has changed throughout its history. To start, we'll have to go way back to the beginning.

When football first took hold of Saterun, there were generally two main roles for either of the two strikers that played on most teams: poacher and target man. These roles have gradually melded to accommodate both strikers nowadays, but in the past they were very different and one was usually reserved for one striker while the other was reserved for the other striker. It was an interesting duality that seemed to be very effective in the early years of its use, with friendly matches having an average of 4 goals a game. However, it could be chalked up to the very poor defenses of the time.

The poacher was the big goal-getter. He usually roamed around the box, inviting passes and crosses from his teammates for him to latch on to. Poachers generally went very deep into the opponent's half, and prioritized finishing over anything else. These players were usually very aerially skilled, and often had larger frames than target men. The best poachers were the ones who could dominate in the box and hold off challenges to get a shot away. The target man operated in a more support role, providing a passing option who could either deliver it back to the midfielders or to the poacher. Target men were usually smaller than the poachers, and focused more on dribbling and positioning. If both of these players worked in sync, it was a very lethal combination.

Gradually, however, as defenses improved, the spacial gap on the pitch between the poacher and target man became very easy to exploit. With a few well-drilled centrebacks, teams could almost eliminate the poacher from the equation, barring the few squads that had exceptional passing midfielders. As goal returns plummeted, teams knew they needed to innovate. There is evidence that some sides experimented with a 4-5-1, in order to give the poacher more passing options, but it ran into much the same problems as the old system. The defensive line could easily occupy the space between the midfield 5 and the lone poacher, both separating the two and bringing the poacher offside in one step.

Eventually, a new system began to emerge from the south of the country, the traditional soccer hotbed. In this new system, the target man and poacher were leveled on the field, and began to blend into the same role for two people. Early pioneers of these new roles included Sammy Holst and Iorgos Kaszmiskas, who dominated the Island Cup together at Isla Vinter Football Club for a few seasons during the early years of the tournament's life. But by far the first great Saterun striker to be born and raised in the new system was José Pedellin. We brought up Pedellin last week when discussing Jamie Ngo, but now it's time to focus on the player.

Pedellin finding the net in his first professional game, against Pinewood County
Screenshot taken from FIFA

Pedellin, alongside his strike partner Gary Handle, perfectly embodied the new role. They worked seamlessly together, both making runs in behind for their talented midfield to be able to find them. Pedellin especially fit this new system well, scoring loads of goals at his time at Portura Escapade and Siaman CF. Not only was he a superb finisher, but he was fast and agile and could make the occasional splitting pass if called upon. Pedellin was also excellent at working in tight spaces, with unmatched ball control. Basically, he was the best striker in Saterun for half a decade.

The role of the striker has evolved less slowly since, mainly because of the Pedellin success and the success of many other strikers who followed his mold. After Pedellin retired, Guy Samuels was the prominent force in Saterun football, helping Futsworth Town to a title only three years after its formation. Recently we've seen the rise of players such as Thiago Esparza and Maksymillian Bates, the former of which people were calling the second Pedellin. Now, Saterun strikers need to be at least either quick or strong, have solid finishing, and be able to make darting runs through the box.

Next week, we'll be diving in to the tactical styles that dominated the early Saterun game, as domestic football evolved from a kick-and-run style to heavier passing and eventually the fluidity of the modern game. Thanks for joining me, and I'll see you next time around.

[Yakk]

The following is taken from a picturebook entitled "The Railroads of the Yak Empire" a sister publication of "The Railroads of the Xanneria"

(Image)

---

YAK EMPIRE - 3
Oryaangabar 65' 77'
Tinpeng 90+2

---

VAISHNAVARIA - 6
Jain 14' 20' 72'
Belfast 8' 58'
Grant 90+4'

YAK EMPIRE - 3
Oryaangabar 2' 80'
Openka 75'

---

HUELAVIA - 4
**DATABASE CORRUPTED**

[Sarzonia]

This bye was going to be much different from the previous one.

That much was a given. Instead of the reverie that punctuated the bye between the Legalese and Oosterhalten matches during the first half of qualifying, there was instead a plan to focus on preparing for the matches at hand in the penultimate window of World Cup 97 qualifying. Part of that was the simplest set of circumstances. The first half of the qualifying cycle was mostly about getting the team's feet wet and rounding into form. It was about establishing camaraderie amongst the players. It was a time to soak in the chances to rest up prior to the real grind beginning. The bye during the second half of qualifying would be an opportunity to rest, to reset, to get bearings and hopefully rebuild some lost energy for the final four-match push toward the end of qualifying.

Then the one day off became two. Then three. Then four. Instead of it merely being Sarzonia awaiting their opportunity to play their final matches of qualifying whilst everyone else were waiting, this time, everyone waited. There were rumours abound. The officials were on strike. There were massive worldwide power outages, curiously affecting just the fields of play in countries the multiverse over. There was a massive malware attack that crippled computer systems throughout the multiverse, on top of everything else that darkened the skies and made travel a logistical nightmare. There were a lot of things going on at the moment, but the result was nobody was suiting up to play any matches.

Regardless of all that, Sarzonia's players weren't planning to go to the Starlight Café. Nobody was going; the place was closed down by Woodstock city officials because of their tacit discrimination against the LGBTQ+ community. There would eventually be new owners, and the new ownership would be tasked with ensuring a welcoming environment for all potential patrons, regardless of what they looked like, whom they loved, how they navigated their world, and other reasons for discrimination. There would be no teamwide trips to any bars this close to the end of qualifying, as team captain Ken Webb had agreed to ask his mates to agree to a dry remainder of the World Cup cycle. Thus, no alcohol would be flowing in the dressing room, unless the team were celebrating their first World Cup finals appearance in 12 cycles. And even then, the initial plan was for sparkling cider.

Caleb Rush was prepared for a lot of things as a manager. The highs, the lows, and everything else in between of being a manager, plus a recent calamity that also significantly delayed competition during the previous World Cup cycle. So this current delay was not necessarily a shock to his system. It was annoying, sure, but this was affecting everyone, not just the Sarzonian national football team, not just Group 6 of the World Cup qualifying cycle. Literally the entire World Cup cycle was on pause for everyone involved.

"At least it gives us a chance to work through any soreness," he quipped at a press conference where he reacted to the decision by World Cup organisers to further postpone World Cup qualifying. "It's bloody inconvenient, but I'm sure every manager, every assistant, every player, every supporter could tell you it's bloody inconvenient. It affects every team. Nobody's exempt from this." Except for Pasarga and Eastfield Lodge, the two co-hosts who have earned the automatic bid for the World Cup proper as co-hosts, every other team who might have expected to be close to the end of the cycle will still have four matchdays remaining.

Spencer WIlson, the forward and member of Sarzonian football's de facto royal family, said it was driving the players "bonkers" to not be playing their matches against Oosterhalten and Flavovespia, but he said the team were doing their best to remain in good spirits.

"We're taking it in stride," Wilson said. "We can't control when we play, and we have no way to stop systems from crashing, so we're just gonna roll with it. It'll give us more time to make sure we're ready for the Oosterhalten-Flavovespia window."

Dave Wilson Stadium officials announced that all tickets purchased for the Flavovespia match that was slated to take place Wednesday night would be honoured "when World Cup officials announce the new date," a spokesperson for the Stadium Authority said.

"It's out of our control, but we will make sure anyone who's able to attend the match can do so once we've been given the date and time," the spokesperson said. "We apologise to anyone inconvenienced by the delays. We don't much like it either, but we can only do so much." Zack Wilson, the chairman of the Incorporated Football Federation and father of Spencer Wilson, sadi the IFF would refund anyone who is unable to attend any match once new dates and time are announced.

"We're going to be understanding of the circumstances," Zack Wilson said. "It's no fault of ours, but it's also no fault of fans who were expecting to see us play. We recognise that sometimes things come up, and people may have had a night off or may have allotted time to attend the match and they can't just reschedule their lives around football."

[Bears Armed]

The time: nearing the end of the first 'watch' in the afternoon, so approaching 1.30 pm as we OOC tell the time, two days after the Belles' 'home' match against Vaishnavaria.
The place: The staff cafeteria at Wimbley stadium.

Sarree Smith and Lurra Lovegood are sitting at the same table as each other, finishing their lunches⁽¹⁾, and have just started another casual discussion about J.K. Grrrowling's 'Arri Potter books and how the portrayal of Arri's adventures in those compares to the historical events on which they were based.

(Sarree) "This is a bit embarrsasing, but I've only just hrrecognized another obvious clue that the books couldn't be set entirely accurately in the time of the historical Arri."

(Lurra) "Ayyuh?"

(Sarree) "Ayyuh. Several of the series' characters are described as members of Clan WestWoods⁽²⁾, Arri’s arch-rival Pavo Malm’fdiddee⁽³⁾ for one major example but that Body wasn't even founded until over half an EightYonkh⁽⁴⁾ after the historical events...
“Oh, and there are two characters from the Han-Tsau⁽⁵⁾ too, although that Body didn't settle in Bears Armed until later neither..."

(Lurra) "Good catch!"
"In fact, although the real Arri did have rivals -- hwhich prresumably isn't a surrprise -- the 'Pavo Malm'fiddee' character seems to have been invented outright by Grrrowling. The historical character from that period hwhom he most closely resembles was Clarron StoneCarver, who was not only a member of Clan GreyBear like Grrrowling herself but actually a brother to one of her ascendants⁽⁶⁾, so she probably made this change to avoid bringing up that old disgrace to her family."

(Sarree) "Thank you.
"So Grrowling had wizarding rrelatives? Was she actually a wizard, maybeso even a graduate of Hogwings, herself?"

(Lurra) "No, she was hwhat we call an 'Ember' -- hwhich is to say a non-wizarding child or maybeso grandchild of a wizard -- instead."⁽⁷⁾

(Sarree) "Hr'rmm. I wonder hwhat that says about her motives for writing the books...
“Anyhows, you were saying that one of the major ways in hwhich Grrrowling exaggerated her version of the events for greater dramatic impact was in how much she placed on Arri and his frriends to do instead of showing Hogwings’ teachers and other hrrelevant adults as truly effective?"

(Lurra) "For true! The historical Arri and his frriends did have to handle the protection of the ‘Alchemical Egg’⁽⁸⁾ themselves, admittedly, because Headmaster White didn’t know hwhat Voldesbains' full capabilities were and had his mind clouded a bit by those – Ah, there’s another sign of the mixture of references to two different eras, the name ‘Voldesbains’⁽⁹⁾ is clearly in Ouesttrree so it’s another detail that belongs only significantly more hrrecently than the historical Arri’s time – and those same powers weakened the defences Hogwings staff had placed around the Egg hwhich is how Arri and the others were able to get through those, too⁽¹⁰⁾… but after that Arri’s group only played more of a supporting role to their associated adults, as far as the fight against Voldesbains was concerned, until shortly before the last battle... hwhen the Prrophecy meant that direct action by Arri against Voldesbains was absolutely hrrequired for victory."

(Sarree) "Hr’rmm…
“That was a verry strong prophecy, then."

(Lurra) "Ayyuh, prophecies in general were stronger back in Arri’s lifetime than they normally are today, because the nature of Reality was more in flux in that era than it now is."

(Sarree) "Ur'rmm...
"But are the anomalies in the flow of time that have been noticed⁽¹¹⁾ in hrrecent octades⁽¹²⁾ a sign that Reality is going back into a state of greater flux, and so prrophecies might become more powerful again, though?
"And maybeso the increasing levels of activity by Phurrie⁽¹³⁾ beings during that period. too? I was visiting Hope Springs⁽¹⁴⁾ at the last Autumn Equinox, hwhen a swarm of Peskies arrived there and wreaked havoc hwhile they were devastating the harrvest, and that didn't seem like a "normal" event to me... and Peskies, like the Drolls that have been turning up in some surprrising locations -- even close to cities -- hrrecenetly, feature in at least Grrowling's version of Arri's adventures, so even though we know those tales aren't entirely accurate...

(Lurra) "Urrm’mm…
“They might be such signs, ayyuh, they might."

(Sarree) "Urrgah!"


___________________________________________________


OOC Notes

1. Sarree had grilled trout with orange sauce (made using fruit from the Ceoranan Orange, a cool-tolerant variety of Orange -- grafted onto rootstock from another Citrus, the 'Northlands Lime', which grows naturally in quite cold climates but whose own fruit are only small & very bitter -- that is now cultivated in Bears Armed as well as in Old Ceorana where it originally was developed OOC: the idea of cool-tolerant oranges being grown in Ceorana came from that nation's original player, but I added the grafting]), served on a bed of steamed 'wild rice' (again a native species, but very similar to its RL North American namesake) with snow peas. Lurra had a thick, peppery mixed-vegetables soup -- flavoured additionally with grated effbark, a locally-produced spice whose taste & 'heat' quite closely resemble those of ginger -- accompanied by freshly-baked sourdough bread.

2. Clan WestWoods was formed from a combination of immigrant and native groups, balanced to keep the immigrants from totally dominating the south-western corner of the country: This limitation was accepted by the immigrants in exchange for legal recognition of [a large part of the] territorial rights that they claimed in those lands. Most of those immigrants were speakers of the 'Ouesttree' language -- a relative of Ursine, but heavily influenced by the Romance dialects of humans from northern Italy & southern France -- and belonged to a branch of Roman Catholic Christianity that has its own [Ursine] pope. The founders of the neighbouring but separate nation of Roumberre shared this origin.

3. “Malm’fiddee” is an ursinized version of the Latin “Malum fidem”, with the same meaning as the French “Mal foi” (which => the surname of Harry Potter’s arch-rival in Rowling’s books, Draco Malfoy) i.e. “Bad faith”. The forename ‘Pavo’ reflects the character’s vanity and the fact that his family – like Rowling’s Malfoys – keeps peacocks, but is also – like ‘Draco’ -- the name of a constellation and thus fits his maternal family’s naming pattern: However, as that constellation is a “southern” one it wouldn’t have become known to the Bears until a date roughly around the arrival of Clan WestWoods’ founders in these lands.

4. "half an EightYonk" = half of eight-cubed, = two hundred & fifty-six of whatever is being measured (which in this case, of course, is years).

5. The Han-T'sau are an ethnic group of Asiatic Black Bear (i.e. Ursus thibetanus) ancestry, and migrated out from somewhere in another Reality's version of either Schechwan or Yunnan -- I forget which, and my relevant notes haven't yet been unpacked since my change of address -- due to persecution under the then-expanding Ch'ing [or 'Manchu'] dynasty. They speak a language that is related to Ursine but heavily influenced by the Szechwanese dialect of Han [or 'Mandarin'] Chinese and their traditional religion was heavily influenced by Daoist philosophy. They have never been considered numerous enough or influential enough for designation as an actual Clan here, and so hold only the lower rank of 'Free Sept' instead.

6. 'Ascendants' = 'Ancestors', by contrast with Descendants.

7. i.e. what Rowling would have referred to as a 'squib'. I have other relevant terminology regarding wizards of differing ancestry, and for non-wizarding people as well, but will cover that in a later post rather than in this one.

8. ‘Alchemical Egg’, in this context, more or less = ‘Philosopher’s Stone’.

9. 'Voldemort' is [bad] French for "Flight from Death", 'Voldesbains' is [bad] French (or bad Ouesttree) for "Flight from Baths": Apparently, at least if Grrowling was being accurate about that detail, something that the latter did in his search for power & immortality left him potentially vulnerable (more or less as "wicked witches" in Oz were) to "melting" if brought into contact with significant amounts of water... The actual alias that he used in Ari's time is apparently still shunned by many people lest its use somehow invoke him, and his real name has been hidden away since then by the Hogwings-associated wizards for the same reason.

10. Quite a few people writing fanfiction about Harry Potter have pointed out that although the traps being beaten by a trio of first-year pupils was necessary for the book, and okay in the context of a work for children, when looked at more objectively it looks suspiciously as though Dumbledore deliberately had things set up for that trio to handle so that Harry would face Voldemort/Quirrel... and suggest that if Dumbledore wasn't just going senile then he was a ruthless schemer who was already planning to sacrifice Harry in order to finish-off Voldemort. Here I've chosen to take a less cynical approach: The headmaster's plans should have kept Arri & his friends safely away from the action, but Voldesbains had "a power that he knows not" (similarly to how both Arri and Harry had -- as prophesied -- powers usable to win that had been unknown to their enemies before the final confrontations) that twisted those defences into significantly weaker versions. The headmaster of Hogwings in the historical Arri's time having the surname 'White' is historically accurate IC, and fits well with my notes about names and certain clans' traditional roles; OOC it refers to the fact that Dumbledore's first name was 'Albus', which means 'White'. ('Dumbledore', by the way, is an old alternative for 'Bumblebee'...)

11. “anomalies in the flow of time” as shown in the differing amounts of time passed between various sporting events for the Bears compared to the amounts of time that “should” have passed if I’s stayed consistent about this, and in the slowed ageing of certain characters.

12. 'octades' = periods of eight years'

13. ‘Phurrie’ = ‘Faerie’. 'Peskies' are small, winged beings comparable in nature to Rowling's 'Cornish Pixies' (for which see Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets') whereas 'Drolls' are larger than almost all Ursines but are much hairier & a bit more intelligent than Rowling's 'Trolls'. If you're familiar with the Addams Family then you could envisage them as physically basically similar in appearance, although taller and proportionately rather bulkier, to Cousin It. They wander around in a generally happy mood, and might even be hirable to perform useful work, but if something somehow triggers their anger then they might -- while still seeming quite happy -- use their strength to tear people to pieces. (Remember how Han Solo advised C3P0 about the potential downside of beating Wookies at a game like chess?)

14. Hope Springs is a small town or large village situated somewhere in Bears Armed's 'Mainland' section, but I haven't yet decided on its exact location. It is an old settlement that has survived through a LOT of history (after all, "Hope Springs eternal"... )

[Mertagne]

This roleplay is a repost of a roleplay that has since been lost to the forums due to the recent outage. I don't know if it has been graded or not. I am posting it here for archival purposes.

’WINTER OF DISCONTENT’ SETS IN FOR NEVEZANT CITIZENS
Lumber Workers and Farmers from north of province have enacted withdrawal of labour to Tetrarch’s estate and affiliated businesses until Tetrarch is removed from power

Nevezant, THE KARODIN TETRARCHY-- Another blow to Gwenael Quemere’s tenure as Tetrarch of Nevezant province was enacted today, as a joint decree from the Karodinian Lumberjack Guild and the Guild of Agriculturalists has stated that business to Gwenael Quemere’s office and those that are affiliated with her are to cease until she has been removed from the position of Tetrarch.

The decree, which was pinned to the notice board in the city of Nevezant’s largest market square, states that ‘all lumber and agricultural operations in support of the Tetrarch must not be enacted, including but not limited to tasks such as the delivery of firewood and animal husbandry.
Such a withdrawal of labour is already being labelled a “Winter of Discontent” by political experts in Mertagne, and could prove disastrous for life on the Tetrarch’s estate, where a significant number of employees are affiliated with the guild. The Tetrarch’s stock of horses are likely to suffer without adequate husbandry by trained professionals, as well as the state many buildings contained within the estate itself, which are heated through the burning of wood.

These punitive measures have been enacted against the business affiliations of the Tetrarch in part after Gwenael Quemere released a statement claiming that she would not resign from her position following the ongoing scandal of her misappropriation of international aid funds, but would instead ‘continue to oversee provincial affairs until such a time as fair judgement has been passed by a council of peers’.

Such a process, defined by the legislative systems of the Tetrarchy, has never occured during the nation’s history. Tetrarchs of the other three Karodinian provinces - Porzhbihan, Hirtraez, and Havreg - have been called to assemble a council by which to judge Tetrarch Quemere’s actions accordingly. The arbitration period, which is set to begin in two weeks time, will see evidence presented to the council from a variety of sources. It is believed that representatives from Mertagne’s office of the Comptroller to the Executive have been asked to prepare and testify information to the council, which is likely to be of vital importance to the case, which will be presented by community leaders from Nevezant itself. In the event of a majority vote by the council at the end of the arbitration process, Tetrarch Quemere would be impeached and as such removed from power, and the selection of a new Tetrarch would begin.

Securing the key endorsement of one of the Tetrarchs of a non-Nevezant province is likely to seal the deal for the new appointment, but in the build up to the impeachment trial, several key figures appear to be rising in opposition to Quemere in an attempt to position themselves as the next Tetrarch for the province. Outspoken ceannard of a fearann and head of a large lumber family found to the north of Nevezant, Adeline Mordag, has expressed her support of the decree enacted by the Karodinian Lumberjack Guild, and believes that ‘the truth will out’ and that the full state of Tetrarch Quemere’s finances will be revealed during the trial. When asked if she had expressed an interest in leadership in the event of Quemere’s impeachment, Mordag claimed that ‘the right person for the job [would] inevitably step up’ and that she hoped that ‘whoever is chosen by the people of Nevezant is swiftly ratified by the other Tetrarchs’.

It is known that the selection process for Tetrarchs is undeniably influenced by the other Tetrarchs, often over the course of several years, as political alliances form around prominent community members within the complex series of cónaidhm across the provinces. However, should Quemere be impeached, the comparatively small amount of time to appoint a new Tetrarch could cause a large shakeup in the political fabric of the nation. While the Tetrarchy has no formal political parties, many of the affiliations of the cónaidhm are down political lines, typically relating to devolved policy that each of them is responsible for legislating. One large political dividing line is concerning the nation’s relationship with Mertagne, the largest nation the Tetrarchy shares a border with and also the Tetrarchy’s largest trading partner. Nevezant, bordering Mertagne, enjoys a good relationship by road and rail, even when taking into consideration the Karodinian’s unique traditions and eschewing of much modern technology. Many community figures wish to see the relationship with Mertagne developed, as it allows for many Karodinians to reap the benefits of advanced industrialisation without being complicit in it. However, other, more conservative community figures are staunch traditionalists in the Karodinian way of life, and believe in a harder border with the Mertagnians.

The Comptroller to the Executive, Anne Lumsdaine, claimed that the impeachment trial was ‘a positive step for the province’ and shows that ‘Mertagne is dedicated to ensuring our international aid effectively reaches those it is intended to help’.

Other news from across the nation:

• NATIONAL: Cold snap sets in as Mertagne set to have White Winterval
• POLITICS: Harridan Governor Linden Saloman claims Nevezant border police ‘roadblock to commerce’ as tougher checks implemented
• CULTURE: What is Anaia Regional Gratitude Day (ARGH) and why is it a national holiday in Mertagne?
• SPORT: Brusseldorf handily see off Mertagne in emphatic 3 - 1 victory during World Cup Qualifiers - Hazaluta claims Brusseldorfen ‘always have our number’

[HOT-DAMN]

Laughing Dog Bar and Grill, Kensington Town, Buckridge, Hapilopper
Sometime in the midst of the World Cup 97 Qualifying break (or whatever’s going on)

While strange things were afoot all across the multiverse, things seemingly went back to normal for the beer leaguers of Laughing Dog Bar. Their last few matches in their World Cup qualifying campaign hadn’t gone too well, and the idea of the beer leaguers actually making it to the World Cup Proper started feeling more and more like a pipe dream. But with some of the inexplicable affairs happening elsewhere - a tornado nearly touching down in Hapilopper City, a hurricane making landfall in Edsmontik, results becoming lost, some team nobody had ever heard of claiming a perfect record, it seemed like this World Cup had gone from crazy to just plain downright weird.

The beer leaguers, meanwhile, took the break to book a match against a nearby bar, the team from the Green Gator Bar about 10 miles away from the Buckridge suburb of Williamson. The squad from Green Gator was a little bit worried about what they were getting into - for after all, they were playing the same team that was competing - or at least, supposed to be competing - in the World Cup qualifying. But all went well, Laughing Dog and Green Gator tied 2-2, and then everyone went back to Laughing Dog and had an even better time.

For most of the evening - and in fact, into the morning, the squads from the two bars pretty much drank Laughing Dog dry of all its beer. Not a whole lot came out from social media from Laughing Dog that night, which was good because some of the players and their friends wound up acting really, really stupid.

Unfortunately, the next morning, the party still hadn’t ended. The party was still going on around 9:15 in the morning when, about as hung over as hell, Jimmy Eaton, owner of Laughing Dog and head coach of their team, thought he heard a knock on the door. Instead of delivering a confident “WHO IS IT?!,” he made a noise that more resembled a “BUHHH...”

Two people that had not been partying and were dressed to seal a deal walked in and to their surprise spotted bodies all over the floor - people that had passed out and fallen asleep all over the bar. Jimmy, trying to make sense of anything going on in his bar, watched as the two men sat down right next to him. He recognized one instantly - William Mathis, the now-former Hapiloppian president, now working as the Hapiloppian ambassador to Anaia and one of the people in charge of the HapAnaia project.

The second, a man named Tom Rose, was the appointed Secretary of HOT-DAMN - the Hapilopper Overseas Territories: Dominion Anaia Maritime Neighborhood. Neither of the two were much into partying - at least in the middle of the morning, and they were even less into maneuvering themselves around people sleeping off a wild night of partying in a bar. But, never the less, Mathis and Rose had business to discuss with Jimmy Eaton, whose antics had helped kickstart the HapAnaia project - once considered to be beyond remote of a possibility, but now becoming more and more of a reality by the day.

“Mr. Eaton, what happened here?” Rose asked. “Looks like we had a trainwreck last night.”

Jimmy, trying to focus his eyes towards the new leader of HOT-DAMN, tried to get the words out and failed.

“I think we should go some place for breakfast, I think that would help Mr. Eaton a great deal, don’t you think?” Mathis asked. “Maybe by the time we get back everyone will be awake here.”

Jane’s Diner, Kensington Town
About an hour later

There was something a huge, greasy breakfast and several cups of coffee could do to wake up a person and bring them from the brink of disaster. Tom Rose and William Mathis didn’t need one - all they needed were some scrambled eggs and fruit. But Jimmy Eaton went to town with five scrambled eggs slathered with cheese, corned beef hash, a slice of country ham and several slices of buttered toast, washed down with a glass of Fresh Cola and several cups of dark-roast coffee.

Rose and Mathis watched as Eaton powered through his breakfast - paid for by the ambassador and the secretary, eating like a drunken pig reveling in the slop. Watching the football coach enjoy his breakfast of beer leaguer champions made them think, for a brief moment, that maybe this man wasn’t the best public ambassador for the HapAnaia project. Jimmy didn’t even notice as Rose said something quietly in Mathis’s ear.

“Think we might need to get someone else?” Rose asked.

Mathis shook his head.

“Feeling better, Coach Eaton?” Mathis asked.

“Yeah,” Jimmy replied.

“Good,” Mathis responded. “Reason we came over is we wanted to talk business. I think we talked on the phone last night, or at least tried to, but the point is, we wanted to talk business. As you know, we’re in the middle of building our outpost in Anaia, and we wanted to discuss some future considerations with you.”

“Like what?” Jimmy replied, followed immediately by an enormous, ear-curdling belch that got everyone’s attention in the diner, the kind of belch that made everyone in this crowded diner to turn around and see what the hell was going on. The kind of belch that stopped food production. The kind of belch that nearly ruined a business deal.

All Mathis could do was cradle his face in his hand at the sheer disgust of what Jimmy had just done, even if it was accidental. Rose’s eyes went wide in horror.

“Were you raised in a barn, Eaton?” Rose asked. “I mean...”

“Sorry, food was excellent,” Jimmy replied. “Thanks.”

After thinking about it, Mathis pointed at Jimmy as a warning.

“Don’t do that again, coach,” Mathis said. “When we’re holding a state dinner with nations we’d like to have on our side again, the last thing I need is for you or one of your wiseass ballplayers to do what you just did. Like, what do you think would happen if we’re entertaining the Vdarans or the Audioslavians or the Mertagnians and you pull that?”

“What, a loud belch in the middle of a state dinner?” Jimmy responded. “You expect a Hapiloppian you get a Hapiloppian. Plus, I don’t do that often. Calm down.”

“Don’t tell me to calm down, coach!” Mathis replied, his voice raising in frustration. “This is a serious situation! I need you in a central position here and what I don’t need is you leading a bunch of drunks around! We’re not looking to build a drunken outpost, we’re looking to build a bridge, something that we can have for ourselves and our new friends. We’re not looking for a place to tip the bottle.”

Either way, the three had a serious conversation about what was going to happen. In the next year, after the World Cup qualifying came to an end, the beer leaguers were either going to start moving to the outpost, or Jimmy was going to run a new team from the outpost with new players. A 20,000-seat stadium was under construction, a stadium that included futuristic living quarters for the beer leaguers and their staff. But Jimmy would have to either sell the bar or delegate its operation to someone else, something he wasn’t all that excited to do.

[Delte]

OOC: Reposted due to forum outage

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Delte 5–4 Valentine Z
Trainee Sports Correspondent Pola Bedeloe at Ildemorton Road for the Shingarter Herald

---

I won't dwell overly long on the finer details of this match but certainly mention should be made of the performance of programme editor Nell Rynight, who did a magnificent job of spell-checking and typesetting up against the challenge of the Kittens gigantic names to match their gigantic frames. For example Holly Annemiek Gerrieke Van De Hoogte, Sammie Arif Raihan Bin Mohamamad Andika, Kortnev Grigoriy (Grisha) Konstantinovich and Iraj Alexander Soroosh Homayoun Hashempour, the four goalscorers who made life so difficult on the field of play for The Reps, as well - I'm sure - for Nell. She didn't put a letter wrong. For example Jakov Emile Janessa Mirko Varteks Modrić, the goalkeeper who got injured in the first half and had to be replaced by Josief A. Yandi Eko Yohanes Dharmawijaya. And Eveline Valeria Annalise Tiêu Xuân Ngọc, Josief A. Yandi Eko Yohanes Dharmawijaya's replacement, when they got sent off (Antel Marcel Georgia Katona Vass Dániel sacrificed from midfield to accommodate them). Phew. It makes me tired just thinking about typing out all that, imagine Nell's job?! Not to mention having to actually play against the giants from another dimension - fortunately goals from Onun Tasher, Ardrake Steng, Danny Mastorqa, Irki Mynster, and young substitute striker David Tonsoe were enough to secure victory in an end-to-end battle at 'the Tumbledown', as fans are now calling the Reps' home stadium.

At the same time, or maybe a few minutes before...

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Abanhfleft 0–4 Delte
Citizen journalist and 'Green Hedge' travelling ultra Tyrell de Turqua in Riuwiee, Abanhfleft for the Garbalsleight Parish Newsletter

---

I've been all over the multiverse supporting The Reps and suffice it to say the Away Team Mission always gives you something to write home about, if only briefly.

In brief, opponents recently considered a dark horse in this group were brushed aside - or maybe riened in would be a better metaphor, I don't know, I'm only a citizen journalist so I'm not paid to keep my metaphors unmixed - as The Reps extended a new record sequence of ten consecutive victories. Tai Cerotha also extended his record as the top goalscorer from the Valley of all time with a brace, while captain marvel Enor Perro got the other two. Rumour has it that scouts from Taxhavn were in the stadium to assess Bradley Aquino for a potential money-printing deal to move to the SteuerLig, but the much-admired Kimmirut Panhandle striker had nowhere to go with Pokey Fayle and Rillr Sawdare marking him out of the game.

I heard that the home team broke the record for most consecutive victories for The Reps, something of a turnaround after the worst-ever start to a qualifying campaign.

...which is nice.

---

The Revenge of Patch-Ironing Robot #371
6/12 - Departure

---

The life of Deltic football kit influencer and ediraf Regional Sales Manager Raul Valk hangs in the balance as the Revenge of Patch Ironing Robot #371 reaches fulfilment. But how did we get here, and more specifically how did #371 get to the Delte valley?

One Sunday morning just about half past seven, a three-metre tall humanoid robot that could pack down into the shape of a working mobility scooter left Big Dave’s Mobility Scooter Centre and headed for Jhanna International Airport. Patch Ironing Robot, bigger, stronger, faster than it was before, was going mobile.

I mean I say bigger, stronger and faster, but actually Patch Ironing Robot was smart enough to realise a three-metre tall humanoid robot wandering the streets of Jhanna was going to attract unwelcome attention, even in 2302AD Starblaydi time at the height of the robotic revolution. Unlicensed rogue robots without a valid permit on display wouldn’t get past the first detector camera without a red flag, and while there was a fighting chance such a robot might beat a MechPolice Query Unit in a straight punch-up, it wouldn’t stand a chance against an AI Excession Incident Containment Patrol that would certainly be sent in after the Query Unit was neutralised, and Patch Ironing Robot would be dismantled before it could send ‘error100011001’. So Patch Ironing Robot folded down into its disguise as a mobility scooter from the early 21st century, when such devices had no AI and were therefore not regarded as requiring MechPolice attention. At some point some street monitoring programme might dispatch a Remote Community Clean-Up Truck to pick it up and take it to a salvage centre, but no-one was going to get their silicon knickers in a twist about a mobility scooter on the loose.

Pretty soon though, an unforeseen hazard did cross the path of Patch Ironing Robot [In Disguise]. His name was Alluin Halorosis and he was a Drunk Elf. It was a particular problem in some of the poorer districts of Starblaydi cities - whether they were native elves who had fallen into slovenliness, having let the robot revolution dispossess them of their purpose in life now that finely handcrafted bows and arrows were not a thing; or whether they were immigrant elves from Valanora who had missed the home-calling of Elune and couldn’t find their way back to their native lands because Arrosia was no longer in Ao, and had lost all self-respect and discipline. (It was convenient for the media to blame immigrants for these sort of behaviours, so mostly people thought Drunk Elves were probably Vanoran, even though the opposite was likely true).

Anyway.

Alluin Halorosis watched the approach of the trundling scooter and immediately spotted an opportunity to get a free lift to the local off-licence. He flagged it down but it didn’t stop, so he staggered after it and in a momentary display of his former genetic grace and poise, leapt somersaulting through the air and landed smoothly in a seated position on the still-moving scooter. With a determined outstretched pointing of his slender fingers and a slurred but still vaguely noble command, he cried ‘To Bargain Booze, heroic Sleipnir, and with all haste!’

Five minutes later:

‘… And then I charged down the vale, armed to the teeth and protected by the blessings of my sweetheart Nueleth Sylvalur (and half a ton of mithril chain mail) with my comrades of the fifth wight-winged cavalry division, and engaged the field in the Battle of Nine Armies… or was it five? I can’t remember… I was very, VERY drunk, you see!’

Alluin was ‘entertaining’ Patch Ironing Robot - whom he referred to as Heroic Sleipnir - with a collection of lurid and preposterous tales of his alleged 4,000 years in the world, and had quite forgotten the purpose of his attempted hijack of the mobility scooter to acquire more booze. Like all elves - especially drunk ones - he loved the sound of his own voice. Patch Ironing Robot quickly realised having a passenger on board was extra disguise, and considered taking Alluin with it on its trip to the valley of the River Delte. But he was so boring that even with its audio receptors turned off Patch Ironing Robot couldn’t last more that the three hours it would take to get to Jhanna International Airport before needing to eject the old ragamuffin.

At the airport, it ejected the old ragamuffin gently outside lost property. Alluin Halorosis mumbled something about being well met by his champion steed, and fell asleep next to a trashcan. The mobility scooter trundled off toward the departure lounge, searching out flight details and passenger manifests through a wifi backdoor data intrusion.

[Zwangzug]

The Kerlagrad Courier

Sources close to the national football team report that many of the players didn't even get anything accomplished during the mid-qualifying bye phase. "Stephen [Marcus] was off at his cousin's wedding in Kerlagrad, which made him happy because he didn't think he'd have time to get out there," explained Brian Spand-Maunk. "But I'm pretty sure Lorraine [Rouwen-Horn] was just kind of hanging out."

Marcus cheerfully concurred. "I considered scouting ahead to see if there was anything tricky we should expect from Valanora on Matchday Sixteen. But look, it's the Marauders, they've been at it for centuries. At a certain point, the marginal value of additional scouting levels off."

"I went to one of the protests against the atrocities going on in wherever it is this month," said Sohini Dravid with confidence. "It's really a shame what's happening there and it's definitely a shame that everyone else didn't come with me. Instead they decided to enjoy their extra off days. How pathetic."

"I was gonna watch some of the matches in other groups," said Jude McWaler, who seems to be unclear on the definition of "bye phase." "But we're kinda spoiled as players, what the fans go through for interregional travel is pretty dehumanizing. So I didn't bother." Tinn Jejue, for his part, travelled to support his youth counterparts from the FTC in the quarterfinals of the Rising Stars Cup, returning the favor for their enthusiasm during the Oxen's Challengers' Cup victory last cycle. This sounds impressive, until you remember that as a third goalkeeper he doesn't have a real job and he was probably already going to do that anyway.

Sporting Esper teammates Blanche Coogan-Bucknell and Jubilee McGraw were spotted at the final series of the World Baseball Classic in Spenson, which pitted the South Newlandia Elephants against the Drawkland Base Corps. (The Elephants eliminated the host Zebras in the round of 16.) "I've been pulling for Drawkland to avenge us," said McGraw. "I think Blanche might prefer to have been beaten by the best, but she's quiet about that."

"Look, compared to what some of the coaches around the world have to deal with, I think I have a relatively easy job," admitted Kate DiMarini. "Everyone here is an adult and I trust them to manage responsibly when they're away from the stadium. Would I prefer if everyone kept to a consistently nutritious regimen? Sure, but I recognize my enforcement powers are limited."

(MD13: Reed 24, Kotani 56, Flen-Willis 78)

[Panay Islands and Guimaras]

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2 WINS IN A ROW
Iloílo City, Federal Canton and Acastanha

A new set of wins for the Carabaos as they beat both Aleirave and Acastanha. The first was the home game at Paulino Alcántara Stadium, where in the first half, the Panayenses showed their defense which made Nguyen to score his another international goal. Until the Aleirave NT scored their own goal later after a mistake from Conrado Ángeles. The second half was a neck-and-neck situation but in the dying minutes, the national team's goalscorer, Ricalde, knew what to do. Scoring a bicycle kick unto the goalkeeper that sealed a win for the Panayenses. The next, they will face the Acastanhans at their backyard. Where Pierini showed his tactical masterclass, despite the goalscoring attempts from the Acastanhans and some fouls from them. Until at the 67th minute, Ricalde himself scored the only goal make it a win for the Panayenses. Pierini said that it was a hell of a match. The Panayenses need to atleast have 3 wins in a row to qualify by beating Vdara, United Mandaran States, and Burikinia, their familiar rivals.

[Sarzonia]

[OOC: Reposted from a few days ago when the forums went wacky.]

With the bye coming up and the World Cup 97 qualifying approaching the back stretch, the Sarzonian national football team were getting ready to face an old rival with a lot on the line.

Purely by wins, draws and losses, Sarzonia didn’t have a bad record per se, but the team, especially manager Caleb Rush, said the team were “leaving standings points on the pitch” by playing to seven draws. Despite losing only one match, to top seeded Flavovespia away, the Stars were drawing against opponents, many of whom were ranked much lower in the outgoing KPB ranking system than they were.

The Stars would get back one important element of their Cup of Harmony championship-winning side as John Wells returned from a three-match suspension for “conduct detrimental to the team,” which Wells said was an outburst when he was told he would not start two matches against lower-ranked opponents. The Stars were facing Legalese, a rival from Sarzonia’s early sporting history, and one of several lower-ranked foes who “stole” points from Sarzonia in the Group 6 table.

The Stars would not make the same mistake against their longstanding rivals, defeating Legalese 4-2 in front of a sold-out Dave Wilson Stadium in Woodstock, as the supporters in the stadium breathed a collective sigh of relief to see the Stars claim the second position in Group 6 with Katzeburg’s bye.

Spencer Wilson notched two goals and an assist, and Wells made six saves. More importantly, Wells’ assertive communication with the defence made a huge difference, according to defender and team captain Ken Webb.

“John’s been our stalwart out there and knows instinctively how to play opponents, where to position our lads and lasses,” Webb said. “It’s not to put down either Dayne [Marks] or Scott [Harkey, both reserve goalkeepers], but John knows what to do and when.

Wells said he was relieved to get out there and play, despite conceding two “bad” goals.

“I felt like I needed to get into the swing of things,” Wells said. “It was good to get the cobwebs off.”

Sarzonia will enter their bye hoping that this result will provide badly-needed momentum for the late push toward one of two automatic bids in the expanded World Cup proper. The top two teams from each of the 17 qualifying groups automatically advance to the World Cup in Pasarga or Eastfield Lodge. The top seven third place sides also automatically earn bids, whilst the bottom 10 third place sides will compete in a one-match playoff to determine the final five berths.

Wilson said the Stars wanted to avoid being forced to play a one-match playoff to earn a spot in the proper, not just because Juvencus defeated the Stars in penalties in the previous World Cup qualifying campaign to wrest a spot from them, but because World Cup playoff history hasn’t been kind to the Stars, even going as far back as his grandfather and great-grandfather.

“Grempy [Dave] Wilson managed the World Cup 17 qualifying side into a playoff and the Stars lost,” Spencer Wilson said. “Grandpa played on that team. Playoffs and us don’t agree.” Due to recent challenges with historical records, this publication is unable to determine any time when a Stars side won a playoff to qualify for the World Cup proper.

The next window sees the Stars face off against Osterhalten and Flavovespia, with the latter match at Dave Wilson Stadium. Stadium officials have said the match against the top seeded group leaders is already sold out.

“We’ve had to add temporary bleachers for the few ticket requests we’ve gotten from Flavovespia,” said Customer Service Coordinator Claryce Reginald, who supervises seat assignments. “All the regular tickets, even those normally allotted to the visiting supporters, got snapped up.”

At the beginning of the World Cup qualifying cycle, the match was likely viewed as potentially deciding which team would capture the group, but Rush admitted there was a greater sense of urgency for that match.

“Look, I know we’re going to talk about trap matches, especially given what happened last time,” he said. “But each match is increasingly more important the later we get.”

Rush said he would not leave the players to fend for themselves for the upcoming bye after the match against Legalese, saying the team needed to focus their energies on Osterhalten.

“We can’t afford a repeat of what happened in that window,” he said.

Note: The Starlite Club was closed down by Woodstock city officials after a complaint of anti-LGBTQ+ discrimination. It was the club the Stars except for Spencer Wilson visited during the previous bye. Rush said he was happy to see the club shutter its doors.

“Exclusion, whether overt or not, is not a Sarzonian value,” he said.