World Cup 95 Roleplay Thread

by **Beefsteak City** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 1:55 am

Beefsteak City
Carey Leclerc, the mayor's assistant, knocked on the door to the mayor's office with a sense of urgency, but you could tell that he didn't want to be bothering the mayor; Mayor Ato didn't usually take kindly to interruptions. Unfortunately, the issue at hand was grave enough that it warranted the mayor's involvement, even if Ato had a tendency to shoot the messenger.

"Mr. Mayor?" Carey called out querulously when there was no answer. He stopped to listen for a moment and sure enough, he could hear the sound of snoring coming from behind the closed door. He opened it a crack and peered in.

The mayor was at his desk, reclining precariously in his chair with his head thrown back. From the violent sound of his snoring, which kept him starting and stirring in his sleep, it sounded like he was on the verge of asphyxiating.

Carey entered, shut the door behind him, and timidly approached the mayor's desk. "Mayor Ato?" he tried again.

The mayor woke with a jolt. "What is it!?" he fumed. "I've told you a million times not to interrupt me while I'm working on municipal business! Productivity will suffer!"

"I'm sorry Mr. Mayor, there's a couple investigators here from the WCC who want to speak with you. They seem to think there's an issue with our roster for World Cup Qualifiers. Something about not all of our players qualifying as Beefsteak City residents."

"That's ridiculous!" The mayor's choler rose even higher. "You know how I feel about residents getting in the way of our beautiful industrial utopia, but I've made begrudging exceptions for our soccer team, so what more could they want?"

"I think it's best they explain it themselves."

The mayor made an abortive effort to get out of his chair, but finding it too difficult, changed his mind. "Fine. Show them in."

Carey disappeared out the door for a moment, before returning followed by two tall businesspeople wearing intimidating suits.

"Good afternoon, Mayor Ato," said the one on the left, a woman carrying a black leather briefcase. "We're from the WCC. I'm agent Mish." The brass nametag on her lapel corroborated her claim.

"And I'm agent Ling," said her partner, a man carrying a clipboard on which he was already furiously scribbling down notes as he glanced rapidly around the room. He too wore a brass nametag, contrasting with the rest of his outfit, which was all black. "We're from the Bureau of Investigation for Gross Offenses and Ommissions of Probable Suspicion, and in particular, the Mishandling and Misconduct branch."

"That's the WCC branch that works to prevent things being mishandled," said Agent Mish, helpfully. "It's not our job to Mishandle and Misconduct."

"A common mistake," said agent Ling.

"So you're telling me that Agents Mish and Ling are the ones responsible for Mishandling and Misconduct?" asked Mayor Ato. "Someone at B.I.G. O.O.P.S. has a sense of humor."

"Huh?" said Agent Mish.

"I beg your pardon?" asked Agent Ling.

"Agents Mish and Ling..." repeated the Mayor. "Your names spell out your own job title."

"Ahahahaha! That's so funny!" Agent Ling burst out laughing. "I've never thought of that before!"

"That's quite clever!" Agent Mish doubled over in stitches as well. "We'll have to start using that--we've always introduced ourselves as Agents Ling and Mish. We'll have to switch it up."

Mayor Ato and his assistant shared a quizzical glance.

"Anyway." Agent Ling snapped out of his fit of hilarity and was suddenly deathly serious. Agent Mish too stopped laughing all at once and pulled herself up to her full height, from where she glared down at the mayor. "We've received some very serious allegations, Mayor Ato," Agent Ling continued.

Agent Mish set down her briefcase on the mayor's desk, and opening it, pulled out a couple mysteriously marked files. "It is our understanding that not all of your nation's national soccer team are in fact Beefsteak City citizens."

The Mayor held up a finger in objection. "Beefsteak Cityzens, we call them," he said.

"Well, you are going to need eleven Beefsteak Cityzens if you want to continue to take part in qualification for the World Cup, Mr. Mayor," said Agent Ling. "And currently, only ten people other than yourself live in this city.

Agent Mish began to read from a list on one of her files.

"Price, Blaine and Michael Maddox, Dykes, Porterhouse, Buffitt, and Jones--all currently sleeping in their executive suites, which have been converted to accomodate them, in skyscrapers belonging to their various corporate headquarters on 3rd and 4th Street. Fargo--staying overnight at his law office, also on 3rd Street. Bone--also staying with Fargo at the law office, since he can't stand to be in the same room as Porterhouse. Collier--working shifts approaching 24 hours at the Stanley-Taylor steel mill on 1st Street, to the point where we'd now consider it his residence. But Emily Pierce..." Mish poked an accusatory finger at the file, then flipped it around to show the Mayor that after the last name there was no address or information, only blank space. "Miss Pierce has been commuting from her parents' house outside of the city, and hence outside of the nation, which means she does not qualify as either a resident or a 'Beefsteak Cityzen' and is not eligible to play on your national soccer team. Which in turn means you cannot legally field a soccer team for WCC competitions."

Agent Ling spoke up. "We've spoken with Coach Salisbury and he has informed us that at one point, during the Baptism of Fire, there was in fact another house in this city--" (Mayor Ato winced in pain at the memory) "and Pierce, along with the rest of the team, did live there for the duration of that tournament. But Coach Salisbury also informed us that you caused that building to be torn down, leading to the current situation in which you are the only person in this nation who actually has a home in the city. That is why we've had to resort to dealing with you, rather than a representative for the soccer team itself."

"B-but the house had to go!" sputtered Mayor Ato. "It contributed nothing to this nation, economically or commercially speaking!" he protested.

"I'm afraid, Mr. Mayor," said Agent Mish, and her tone was grave, "that if you don't have housing for at least a starting squad of eleven in this nation, the WCC will be forced to end Beefsteak City's involvement in this tournament--immediately."

by **Aphrilia** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 5:05 am

The Issue I Had With You All This Time.
OOC Note: The domestic teams mentioned here will be referring to their academy teams.

Although the tension is finally starting to fade, there was still a few things about their conflict that scratched the back of his head.

For the longest time that he could remember, Kevin Lacey only knew struggle. Always at danger, and having to survive... He did many things. From stealing, to violence, fighting in the streets and even getting involved in situations that usually the adults dealt with. But if you look at it, you can't really blame Lacey completely for the things he had to do. Growing up within the small city of Covenant, there wasn't much to go by. He remembers very well what his caretaker at the orphanage he grew up in said about his parents. "I don't know them... I just found you at the door of the orphanage, with a letter requesting that we take you in and care for you. They promised to return." And Lacey just accepted the fact that they would never return. Though with Aphrilians being immortal, who knows. Perhaps when he's grown to the multiversal stage of fame, maybe his parents would suddenly reappear out of nowhere to meet him. Heh, he wishes. But it would be nice if it actually happened.

When you're young and going through struggle, the only real thing you can do is to escape from the pain of your trials. And even then, it's not a permanent escape... It's always temporary. Maybe fishing, or perhaps working to try and find money, or doing well at school. Lacey never went to school, but he picked up something that was nearby the entrance to one. A football that seemed to be brand new, with red and blue stripes that complimented the typical white and black. A kid approached him out of nowhere and asked for the ball... And while this would be the moment Lacey tried to run with the ball, he asked if he could join whatever the kid was doing with the ball. And that was how Kevin Lacey found out about football and quickly loved it. He ended up parting ways with the kid on that day, but he told his caretaker and the other kids at the orphanage about the encounter. All of them were quite interested, even the caretaker who didn't know much about sports. Ever since then, they would go to the nearby field to play football almost every evening. Eventually when Lacey grew to be about ten years old, he was officially adopted by a man named Graham Stevenson.

And to make things even sweeter, it turned out Mr. Stevenson saw Lacey play football at the football field in the small city and that he was a scout for a particular football team in the Aphrilian Ultra League in Chapelstove Docks FC. He saw the talent that Lacey had, and he reminded him of his actual son that he had lost in a car accident a few decades ago. And thus was Stevenson's decision to not only adopt him, but to also admission Lacey into Chapelstove's football academy. Of course, Lacey can still contact and visit the orphanage whenever he desires so. And thus he moved to the city of Chapelstove along with his newly adoptive father to start his path onto becoming a football player. During his time at the academy, people could truly tell that Kevin Lacey was a talented kid who put in a lot of hard work into honing his craft, but his mannerisms and behavior were that of street football. Likely due to his past actions and time in Covenant. He's trying to change, but it's hard... And then he came.

The match that would start this rivalry between him and another player. That player being Kennedy Christonson of Luther City FC. Lacey didn't know why, but he was interested about him when he first heard the name. Doing some research and whatnot on Christonson, something he never did for any other player before... He looked familiar to the forward. Christonson was also apparently a rich kid and one of the best players on his team, getting into Luther City's academy very early on. Christonson also seemed to be a physically imposing with an insane amount of endurance and relentlessness. Lacey found himself challenged considering he's more of a technical player, and if there's one thing that he was taught it was that if you can't play hard then you've got to play smart. And so he trained for the match that would start these two's conflict with one another. The match was at Chapelstove Docks FC's home stadium in the Golden Verdict Stadium located right in the exact center of the city, and Chapelstove started with the ball.

Lacey had scored literally just four minutes into the match, dribbling past Luther City's midfield and even playing a fake past Christonson to hit the ball just outside the box and put it in to have Chaspelstove 1 - 0 up. But then throughout the match, it was a struggle. Although Lacey had nothing to do with the way the match proceeded to go, both sides got quite physical with one another as a fight even broke out before half time. By that point in time through the match Lacey had also realized that Christonson was specifically marking him along with two other Luther City players. At the least he could still attempt shots at their goal, but they were all saved by the goalkeeper. Lacey wasn't the most stamina-focused player, so he was starting to run out of breath ten minutes into the second half, where Luther City made it 1 - 1. Time flies by, with both teams getting even more physical to each other. And the match was decided by the 81st minute, where Luther City ended up earning and scoring a penalty to win the match 2 - 1 after a hard fought battle. When both sides went to congratulate/console one another, Lacey said something he'd... Rather not recall.

Then all hell broke loose.

Well, the tension didn't shatter because of them. But rather, a Chapelstove player had thrown a punch right at another Luther City player and a whole fight started. But while the fight happened, Christonson said some stuff back that kind of pissed Lacey off and the two ended up arguing and shouting at each other. It ended up becoming a massive scandal and the two players wouldn't be on speaking terms for quite a while. While Christonson just forgets about what happened, Lacey decided to take a completely different approach to the confrontation the two had. He would work much harder, constantly training until midnight and sacrificing school. His adoptive father was worried, and so he talked to him about it. The feeling of being belittled by the words of someone else was something that Stevenson was familiar with, and thus he decided to pass down the advice that was given to him by his own father. "Emotions can be a driving force but don't let it control you. You are not the beast, you are the tamer."

And ever since his adoptive father said that to him, Lacey had redirected his emotions more into his training and match performances rather than having them be lashed out upon his teammates. While he wasn't great yet, he was getting there in terms of his maturity. Football then properly became an outlet and his passion. Lacey stayed with the Chapelstove Docks academy, continuing to develop himself further and becoming a better player and a better person as a whole. But then came the announcement of him being in the Di Bradini Cup roster. And what did you know? Kennedy Christonson was also in the team roster. And while the two really didn't kick it off well between the two of them, they understood that they would have had to face each other sooner or later. And it also helped that a certain Phillip Karnwell and Steven O'Truffet was there too. Those two helped the communication between him and Christonson become less stressful, and later on they realized that the two were getting better in their relationship as "friends".

Yet alas, they lost in the knockout rounds. Lacey didn't get the moment to talk about their whole rivalry with one another due to their elimination, and he thought that would just be it. That was until the announcement that he, Karnwell, O'Truffet, and Christonson were called up to the senior national team for the World Cup Qualifying. Lacey knew he would get the chance to talk to Christonson about the issues between them, and he had to make it count. Although he was more often than not on the bench, he really didn't mind it too much. There would come a time when he was needed. It gave him time to reconcile about his own thoughts first before trying to talk to Christonson, which was something Lacey really needed. He was also helped by a few other players when he opened up about the situation. Karnwell, Campton, McPraxley, and even Roberts were able to help him build up his mental courage to approach Christonson about it. And when they were in their room after beating Corrupt Petrostate, he finally asked.

"Hey, Christonson... Can we just talk about us? That match and what we said to each other?"

And thus, the two of them decided to talk about it in the room that they shared. First of all, Lacey apologized for what he said directly to his face when they were still teenagers, having came to the realization that Christonson worked hard to get to where he was and was not just supported by his family in terms of finance to be able to reach his current position a year ago or two. And when he laughed at it, Lacey was surprised at the reaction. Of course Christonson stated that he understands Lacey and that he shouldn't have belittled him by saying that he should have worked harder to beat him. Because Lacey has always been working hard to be the best. Christonson apologized for his own words and actions, and the tense air between them definitely felt like it had faded. Lacey was glad they finally talked about their rivalry... Which to be honest wasn't supposed to be a rivalry in the first place. The media just hyped it because they were the two best upcoming players of their generation.

But there was still one more thing that was bugging him. Christonson felt familiar, even before they met on the field for the first time. There was some ideas on why he felt so familiar, but Lacey wasn't certain that the theories in his head would hold up well. But he decided to try and ask Christonson anyways because there really wasn't any risk in doing so.

"Say, Lacey... Not to sound weird but you feel familiar. Even before we met on that day. Do you feel the same?"

"I know the answer to that one. We met much earlier than you think. It's fine if you don't remember much of it."

"...I see. I'm glad then."

by **Recuecn** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 5:31 am

Back-to-back wins in qualifying for Reçueçn's équipe nationale have fanned the flames of the fever sweeping the nation. Halfway through qualifiers, Reçueçn is somehow sitting in second place in their group, an unlikely feat, and one which, if they are able to repeat it in the second half of qualifying, will see them earn a play-off spot. That, in turn, will potentially allow them to earn a spot in the World Cup, something no one thought possible just a few months ago.

Since their opening game against Zeta Reka & Hugeltaldom, Reçueçn has remained undefeated, an achievement that might be unremarkable for a larger nation or one with a more storied footballing history, but for the tiny alpine country of Reçueçn, it's nigh on a miracle. The nation's flag is now often seen festooned publically or flying in front of people's houses, violet, scarlet, and gold. Jerseys for l'équipe nationale have sold out, and people often wear them in the streets. The televised games, which originally, merely being qualification matches, drew little coverage, now receive analysis on primetime. Politicians have begun to try to get players from Les Licornes to attend their rallies for publicity's sake, and advertisements featuring the players are prominent on billboards, television, the radio, in newspapers, and anywhere you might expect to see a product endorsement.

Manager of l'équipe nationale, Bonheur Relié, had coined a phrase in his first speech to the newly called-up team, "The Spirit of 83". Looking back now, its aptitude appears almost prescient, as the fever is clearly sweeping the nation in a unique way. The "Spirit of 83" is alive and well.

Les Licornes earned the first of their recent pair of wins while visiting Dod Rava at the Stadion 'Górski' in Szczylek. The Dod Ravians were looking for a more balanced game, but the Reçuecians, as usual, were content to sit back and wait for their opportunity. It came before the end of the first half when Laurent Lapix launched a virtuosic shot from outside the penalty box, arcing the ball just past the outstretched fingers of the Dod Ravian keeper Nora Lérida.

There were only about five more minutes left to play before the half-time break, and when the teams came back out in the second half, Reçueçn was more defensive than ever, refusing to allow Dod Rava near their goal or even really make much of an attempt to score any more for themselves. The stadium filled with boos and whistles as Les Licornes essentially just waited out the last twenty-five minutes of the game, passing the ball mostly in their own half and making only half-hearted ventures forward, which always resulted in retreat at the first sign of any resistance. Despite the scorn it drew from the home team's supporters, however, the strategy paid off and Reçueçn finished out the game as a safe one-nil victory.

Relié used a similar strategy against British Covelandia a few weeks later. This time the Reçuecians played host, and the home crowd was prepared for Relié to park the bus, something Reçuecian managers have become known for. The first half remained scoreless, so it was not until the last half hour of the game that Les Licornes began to push down the field more to see if they could convert the game into another win. Emboldened by finding that the Covelandian side seemed unable to find a response to their forays, the Reçuecians began to play with more and more aggression. Franky Adams drew a yellow card in the sixty-eighth minute, when he got a bit too physical fighting for the ball, but the energy continued to mount. In the seventy-fourth minute, he was tripped while running into the box and the referee awarded a penalty kick. Relié directed Franky to let his teammate Per Tegeler take the kick, and Tegeler converted it with confidence, giving Reçueçn a one-nothing lead. Again, Les Licornes fell back, and were able to maintain their advantage to take the win.

Les Licornes will play back-to-back home games as they now repeat the first half of their qualifying schedule with the venues flipped; their next game after hosting British Covelandia will be a repeat of their opening match against Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom. This time, playing at home, and with months of intense training under their belt, the Reçuecians will be hoping to eke out a victory.

Franky stared at the grass and toed the soccer ball back toward Laurent. Despite the brisk autumn weather in the park on the outskirts of Reçueçn City, a bird somewhere in the trees along the edge of the field still offered up a plaintive cry.

Franky looked up toward Laurent, waiting for the return pass. Wordlessly and with a single touch of the ball, Laurent arched a perfect rainbow over his own head, and the ball landed perfectly for Franky to trap it.

"Wow, nice, dude," said Franky. Laurent responded with just the hint of a smile.

Had Laurent always been this awkward? Franky wondered. I thought this was at least going to be fun. Screw you, Gerauld, for getting me into this.

It had been at the suggestion of Gerauld Firaut, goalkeeper for Les Licornes, that Franky had messaged Laurent Lapix to "maybe hang out and kick a soccer ball around sometime?" They'd never hung out outside of practice before, which was a bit unusual given that Franky was a huge extrovert and was usually fast friends with all his teammates. Gerauld, of course, hadn't suggested a hangout session--he'd merely hinted that Laurent and Franky ought to practice together more. "He's immensely talented," Gerauld had said. "I think the two of you could do some really special things together."

Franky, unable to imagine spending a lot of time practicing with someone whose company he didn't enjoy spending time in, had decided he'd need to befriend Laurent before that could happen. At least kicking a soccer ball around at the park seemed to serve both ends at once, and so he had chosen it as his course of action, but things were not going as well as he hoped.

Laurent had said yes, he'd be happy to, and there wasn't anything specific he'd said or done that Franky could put his finger on and say he disliked. But something about him rubbed Franky the same way. He was quiet, unlike Franky, who was as talkative as you please, and Laurent didn't mind letting a conversation die or spending time in silence. Franky thought it was awkward. He also thought Laurent came across as a bit standoffish, with the way he gave curt answers to Franky's get-to-know-you questions and was reticent to start conversation topics of his own.

Franky kicked the ball back to Laurent, rolling it simply across the ground. Laurent met it in stride, striking it perfectly with the inside of his foot and sending it flying in a low, direct trajectory right back to Franky's feet: a perfect pass. Franky tapped it back to him.

Was this all there was here? Obviously Laurent was skilled at the game, Franky knew that, and he'd like to think that his ego wasn't so big he couldn't accept the possibility that Laurent was potentially better than he was. But there was no connection between them, no spark. Years of training with Lebo and Tegeler had taught Franky how to work together with the other forwards on l'équipe nationale, and with the old midfielders who hadn't been called up this year, Leclair and Saunders, he'd found a syngergy. Even with his friend Emanuele Cutrona, who played a sweeper role just in front of the goal, Franky found that their understanding of each other off the pitch led to better teamwork together whenever they did in fact wind up close enough during a game to work together.

With Laurent, Franky felt none of that. Laurent's execution of his passes was perfect. During games his tactical vision was without peer. But all his brightest moments were times when he had put on shining displays of individual skill. Not that he was selfish or a ball hog, but Franky wouldn't describe him as a team player.

Laurent passed back to Franky, sending the ball skimming along the ground and rustling up the fallen leaves that had nestled into the grass. Franky stopped the ball, rolled it backward, and passed behind his leg, striking the ball with his heel.

"What's on your mind, Franky?" Laurent asked as he received the ball. "You seem a bit down, or maybe just lost in thought."

Oh, fuck, thought Franky. There was no way he could tell Laurent his thoughts, but he wasn't ready with a lie. "Just thinking about the way the team works together." Or doesn't, he added in his head.

"It's fascinating, isn't it?" asked Laurent. "Genève and Reçueçn have such different styles just between the two of them, let alone the rest of the league, and then when you consider we also have players who have played internationally in the past, it's a wonder we've been able to gel as well as we have been."

Franky gave Laurent a look, confused where this sudden burst of talkativity had come from. Laurent misunderstood it as impatience for the ball, and sent him a pass.

Franky dribbled the ball back and forth between his feet as he thought of what he wanted to say. "Do you think playing internationally really changed your perspective? Has it made it difficult to play with the homegrown players?" Like me?

"Definitely I play differently than you." Laurent was matter of fact. "I don't think it's a surprise. Creatures adapt to their environment, and we are no different. If you don't adapt, you cannot succeed."

"Have you adapted to playing with Reçuecians yet?" asked Franky.

Laurent laughed. His laugh was clear and ringing, but in the bright, empty autumn air of the field it vanished without resonating. "You don't think I have?" His tone was not accusatory, he was merely stating a fact. "That's fair enough, I suppose. I think I do still have a lot of things to learn from you and the rest of the team. We've had to fight hard to get to where we are in qualifying, and it hasn't always been pretty."

Franky was bright red, embarassed at having his thoughts read so plainly. "I didn't mean to imply--" he began. "I mean, I think we need to adapt to having a new midfielder as well. It goes both ways."

"No, that's ok. I mean, it's maybe true, but the onus is on me as the rookie to find my place in the coach's strategy. Of course I can't expect everything to change here to make things the same as they were in Tequilo, just for me."

"You do sense a bit of a disconnect then?" The passing game had stopped, and Franky now stood with one foot perched atop the ball, earnestly focused on the conversation. Now that the subject had been breached, he was no longer uncomfortable talking about it.

"Yes, certainly. I've mentioned it to Relié. But I think no one likes to talk about it openly because we're afraid, maybe, we'll be seen as trying to point blame on others."

Franky nodded. Could Laurent read his mind?

"It's always little things," Laurent continued. "Someone running the wrong direction--what I consider the wrong direction, I mean--a direction I don't expect, when I'm about to pass to them. Or I'll find a position I think is great and no one else sees the same potential. Or sometimes it feels like everyone else in the midfield has the same idea except for me. All little moments in a game, but those moments add up. We could be playing on an entirely different level if we really synced the way a world-class team would do."

"I think you see those things in a way I don't," said Franky. "I can feel something is off a lot of the time, but I usually can't put my finger on where exactly the disconnect is. I know you're new to the team, and you're the youngest player, but we've all been there--not long ago for me. You should feel more free to call those things out when you see them."

"Thanks," said Laurent. "I can try. There's still a lot of room for improvement. But I think if I ever learn to fully adapt to the team, we'll be able to accomplish great things."

"Gerauld said the same thing," said Franky. "You two can really see the potential. I haven't seen it yet, but the way you two talk about it excites me. I'd like to give it a chance." Franky was surprising himself as he heard the words come out of his mouth. One conversation about tactics and now he was getting along just fine with Laurent? "Would you want to do this more often?" he asked. "It wouldn't have to be a silly passing game like this. It could be more in-depth practices, or maybe some film review or something else. But I think I have a lot to learn from you, and I think you have a lot to learn about how to integrate your talent into the team. I want to make both of those things happen."

"Absolutely," said Laurent. He was grinning now, no longer his coy smile from before. "That's the spirit!"

Franky laughed. "No!" he yelled. "Don't say that! Relié's been talking about 'The Spirit of 83' more than I can stand! If I hear someone say the word 'spirit' one more time, I think I'll snap!"

Laurent laughed too. "Okay, okay! The attitude then! Together, we can make this happen!"

by **Santa-Barbara** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 5:46 am

Ephrem Bellarmine Post 6&7 Match Press Conference

"Now that's more like it. After a couple demoralizing results picked up in matchdays 4 and 5, we bounced back and showed our true form. To start with, a close yet convincing 2-1 win over Damukuni set us right off and helped us regain the confidence within in us. We were solid all-round. Our forwards pressed hard which lead to th2 goals we scored. Our midfield commanded the creativity we incorporated into our game and executed our playmaking routines to the max. And our defenders were composed and exhibited the vibrant chemistry we have in this team. We were unlucky to concede that goal but I am happy with our overall performance. Our next game against Infdusse was a more impressive performance as we were able to get a point against a formidable team. We played with heart and pushed on from our win to get this terrific result. Those 2 games now put us at 5th place which is respectable considering how fresh we are to this competition. I'm proud of every single one of our players and I am optimistic for what the next couple matches bring."

by **Flavovespia** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 5:50 am

Valentine Z 3 - 0 Flavovespia

An early goal for Valentine Z put Flavovespia on the back foot, and they never recovered as their perfect record came crashing down. In a key game in the group, Flavovespia were found wanting.

Flavovespia made no changes from the squad that beat Milchama. However, Valentine Z started sharper and immediately it paid dividends. A quick break down their right saw David Lyons beaten. The initial cross by Clemente Kenneth Evans L. Jiang Guanyu was cleared by Nathan Crewe, but on the half-volley Antel Marcel Georgia Katona Vass Dániel hit the ball through the crowded box and into the net. 1-0 with only 3 minutes on the clock.

Flavovespia were shaken up, now needing to come from behind in this key group game. However conceding early seemingly put the nerves into Flavovespia. They were forgetting the basics, with too many wayward passes and service to the front 3 was poor. It was a loose pass in the 24th minute by Jonathan Goldstone that lead to a quick Valentine Z break. Holly Annemiek Gerrieke Van De Hoogte got one on one with Nathan Crewe, and was able to steer the ball past him and in, making it 2-0.

Flavovespia’s best chance to get back into the game came in the 34th minute. A great cross by Jonathan Bagshaw found Michael Cole at the back post, but a sublime save by Eveline Valeria Annalise Tiêu Xuân Ngọc kept the lead at 2. 2-0 was the score at the break, with Valentine Z well in control.

A slow start for Flavovespia in the second half for Flavovespia saw them switch into a 4-2-3-1, Jonathan Goldstone off for Anthony Lane with Amrik Singh going central. Lane and Singh both had chances, but snatched at them and failed to trouble the goal, with Flavovespia looking up against it.

With Flavovespia needing to push up, Valentine Z were able to counter, and their 3rd goal came in the 76th minute. This a long ball from the deep found Holly Annemiek Gerrieke Van De Hoogte, and whilst Nathan Crewe could get a hand to the shot, he wasn’t able to keep it out.

The dying minutes of the game saw Flavovespia at least hope for a consolation, but none was forthcoming. The 3-0 result was fair given the play, with Flavovespia left wondering if fatigue, concentration or overconfidence was a factor. They knew now automatic qualification via a group win was no easy task.

Flavovespia 0 - 2 The Dictatorship of Vanilla

An early red card derailed Flavovespia, as they fell to a shock loss against The Dictatorship of Vanilla. Flavovespia’s opponents won their first ever Qualifiers game, as Flavovespia were made to run errors.

It was a rotated squad for Flavovespia, as they aimed to return to winning ways after their loss in Valentine Z. And despite the rotation, the opening minutes looked good for Flavovespia, a good number of passes, and Peter Langdon having a shot well saved. The pressure was building.

Everything however changed a little after 15 minutes. One long ball over the top saw Paul Taylor in a foot race with their striker. Taylor clipped their heels, sending them sprawling. The referee with little hesitation reached into the back pocket and showed a red card for a denial of goalscoring opportunity. Paul Taylor, and several other Flavovespians were furious, claiming the contact was far too exaggerated. Taylor’s angry shouting at the striker as he stormed off summed up his mood, and has gotten him into a post-match investigation.

The Dictatorship of Vanilla then struck when the iron was hot. The free kick was pushed out for a corner. Then, with the corner whipped in, their tall centre back jumped up and with a downwards header sent the ball into the net. Flavovespia were down a goal and a player, even against a side ranked 236th, this wouldn’t be easy.

Left to play a 4-3-2, and with Langdon off early for Stuart Cookson, it was tough for Flavovespia’s attack with no target man. Jonathan Bagshaw nevertheless made some good dribbles, and twice played in some dangerous crosses that Anthony Lane was unlucky not to make a better connection with. The rest of the first half was relatively even, but it remained 0-1.

Down but not out of it, Flavovespia came so close to an equaliser in the 47th minute, when Kieron Player’s long range effort curled past the goalkeeper, but then struck the outside of the post and bounced wide. The long shots were opening up a little space, but Flavovespia with a player down were still cramped for room.

All of Flavovespia’s good work in seeking an equaliser was for naught in the 66th minute. A good through ball saw their second striker beat Malcolm Beresford. He then took his shot well, keeping it low and across goal, and Nathan Crewe just couldn’t get down to block it in time, 0-2 now.

Flavovespia had a mountain to climb, and by now it looked like their oxygen tanks were depleted and their ropes all knotted up. The Dictatorship of Vanilla could play “Park The Bus” football, and play that football well they did. A frustrated Flavovespia found no way through. A robust challenge on substitute Michael Cole nearly saw him join Paul Taylor for an early exit as he squared up to the defender, with Jonathan Bagshaw needing to calm his fellow forward down.

0-2 it finished, and Flavovespia were now on the wrong side of an upset against a Pot 1 nation. They finish the first half of qualifying on 15 points and in 2nd, 3 off Valentine Z at the top but only 3 points above Savojarna in 5th. A strong recovery effort is needed, firstly to guarantee at least a Top 2 spot, and secondly to go for the group win.

by **Audioslavia** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 6:37 am

Intermission
Brought to you by the team behind The Idiot Project, now a successful sports museum!

We interrupt your regularly scheduled Jeremy Jaffacake escapades to bring you some statistics from the Idiot Project Database, which has recently undergone some spring-cleaning in time for its transformation from a hilariously slow Google Sheets spreadsheet to a whip-fast interactive online SQL database. All friendly matches have been removed from the system, leaving only competitive World Cup Qualifiers, World Cup Playoffs, First Round and Knockout matches, each indexed according to what type of match they were, in which cycle they were played in, and which scorinator was responsible.

First, here's a video exploration of 5-Cycle-PPG, which takes the average Points Per Game for any team that played fifty or more games across its World Cup history, and arranges them in order from best (nearest 3) to worst (nearest 0) from World Cup 1 to World Cup 94. Confusingly, the number at the bottom right will only display the cycle before the one currently affecting the numbers on the screen, so please mentally add a '1' to each cycle.

Secondly, in keeping with the number 5, here's the Booker T Interactive Network, a chart showing the teams which have five or more recorded wins over other teams (or, in other words, beaten them five times, five times!), and arranges them as a network of dots, with an arrow pointing from a team to any team they have beaten five or more times.

Mytanija have beaten Qasden and Eastfield Lodge at least five times

Actually, quite a lot of teams have beaten Eastfield Lodge five times

And yes, we know how these charts always pan out, but look which way the Valanora-Starblaydia arrow is pointing

Finally, here's an updated Sosimo Lissón Metric graph, similar to the one seen near the end of Episode 5, Chapter 1 of The Idiot Project. The Sosimo Lissón Metric measures how much a team refuse to lose football matches over a three-cycle period. Basically, a team's total matches over three cycles is divided by how many games they lost over that period. The higher the number, the more staunchly that team refused to lose. Schottia's 78-80 performance is still the greatest in history, but removing friendly matches from the database pushes a few more Vanorian teams to the fore, seen here in the Constellation of Valanoras.

Jeremy Jaffacake and Whatever Zany Antic He's Doing This Cycle will return next matchday.

by **Kimi-Suomi** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 7:51 am

Beating the EOT convincingly and then losing in Eura itself seemed to be the expected path. Now, the Huuhkajat of Kimi-Suomi had an L on their resume for the first time this WCQ and had to pick themselves up to stay on track in a chaotic group situation. Esko Laaksonen knew that things were certainly getting tight and twisty here in Group 20, but he also still had faith in his team and their potential...but would that faith be misplaced?

Up first was a big game in Lumikukkulat as the Galaktien Colosseum hosted one of the main contenders in the form of Koronavinen [Koronavia] in a game that both teams were hoping would be their breakthrough in the dynamics of this group. Both Anna-Leena Outinen and opposing Captain Amadeus Endlinsberg were tested throughout the game with players such as Kimi Airo, Maria Tuominen, Jonas Limid and Michael Levovich all coming after them across the 90 minutes. But they held firm and, as a result, this clash in the Suomen Country ended in a 0-0 draw. Fair...but it also left a 3-point gap to Kelssek to climb.

After that, we would be starting a 3-game road stretch in Okoya, the home of the debutant that has been causing a lot of noise so far. We knew that in order to better our position in this battle, we had to start hampering the campaigns of others...and we started with Okoya here in their backyard. Valtteri Nordström got the ball rolling in the 1st half and from there, we never looked back as Mika Noronen and substitute Remu Jantunen put a 3-0 win into the books to end the first half of this WCQ process.

4-2-1, 14 points, 2nd place - ahead of Koronavinen by GD and behind Kelssek by 3 points. That situation is better than nothing, but the question remains - do we have more in the tank or is this our apex? Only time will tell on that, but we won't have much time to digest these questions as the big games keep on coming. We're off to Kelssek next in a BIG BIG BIG game before we end the away stretch in Pimeämaninen [Darkmania]. These next few games may be big for our overall ambitions...and every point is going to count a lot more now. NOSTA KUIN HUUHKAJAT!

by **Ko-oren** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 8:37 am

"There's just... so much here." Gelogathingun, the Ko-orenite minister of foreign affairs, was on a video call with some seven other cabinet members, with a few dozen staff listening in as well. "There's second by second details of radar positions of our ships, the Mertagnian ships, and the Bostopians. There's eyewitness accounts from civilians on the coast. And obviously there are a lot of testimonies from Bostopian soldiers, taken from the final days of their Ochre Island invasion and from within Bostopia itself."

"Figures that The Guy will allow neutral journalists and NGOs if it fits his agenda."

"The Duke, and yes. It's all exactly what Bostopia would need to justify their response in the Ochres. Apart from explaining what their ships were there for in the first place - and any subsequent action they've taken over Calania since then. I mean, the human rights organisation who wrote this definitely know who was in the wrong there, and they've issued a handful of reports on the complete lack of legitimacy as to their invasion... and yet, this specific issue just keeps pointing back at us."

"Abodhiru, can you go over the specifics, and we can have our departments go over the exact timelines to see what lines up?"

"Sure. I just don't see what doesn't line up. There's the radar information - it has the positions of pretty much all ships that were inside the bubble, around the time of the fight. Honestly, that's for Baudilio and Zakuth and defence and navy. Feel free to verify it but I see no way that could have been fudged.

Then there's the eyewitness accounts. We could ask the Ochre government if we can investigate - but surely no sovereign state would allow that, and the next question is, is the Ochre government in any position to handle that investigation themselves? Both in terms of neutrality and manpower. Sanena, can you and the Anaian affairs department take care of that?

And then there's the Bostopian affidavits. There's no way that can be verified or checked. But that leads me to a final thing: the Mertagnian in charge of their fleet, or the specific ship involved, hasn't been tracked down or interviewed. I don't think Mertagne is holding anything back - so the question is, why hasn't the HRO contacted them? And moreover - why haven't they contacted us either?"

"What do you mean?"

"We have a navy. A modern navy. With a clear line of command. Someone was in charge - someone must have given the order to fire. Not just fire - fire first. So either the chain of command wasn't followed, I think our constitution and every document in the Ministry of defence is clear on that we shouldn't get involved in fights, let alone a situation where we might in any way be the party to shoot first. So that's another option."

"If they didn't know that Ko-oren is entirely pacifist, that's ridiculous. That leaves two options - they didn't follow orders and shot anyway. Or-"

"Or they had a legitimate reason to fire."

"That's the angle."

"I see no other way. Obviously we should have the officer at the scene questioned, but he must have seen something that made him realise he was in imminent danger and the shot was completely legitimate. Either way, Baudilio, have the captain's statement taken."

"That's not your call to make, but I will make sure of it. Zavan Wezhathen was in charge of the only ship we had there. He should have been on board."

"Wasn't he at the command centre with our allies to set up communications?"

"Zakuth, how likely is it to you that a lieutenant was the highest ranking officer on that ship and made that call?"

"Non-zero chance, but I'd bet against it."

"Do you have a name?"

"Mauzuk Naladhin and Zhiren Athonuthen, the two lieutenants on that ship. There will have been more, sub-lieutenants in charge of specific units. One of the three was back at the command centre."

"Which of the three?"

"I will have that looked into."

At that moment, prime minister Laurderinthen spoke up for the first time. "I trust you all to find the answers. I don't need to remind you that we have had a navy for barely a few months before this incident. It's taken god-knows-how-much political capital to get defence on the national radar - don't make this incident be the reason for it to disappear immediately and completely. We have to have an answer for when this story hits the media. Don't make us look like the party in the wrong, or worse, stupid, incompetent and underprepared."

by **Acastanha** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 8:38 am

Timeline of the Kolanos Gulf War

Leihituan Counteroffensive
In this period, Leihitu start their counter attacks to recapture their lost territories as Keiraha facing a huge battle against Acastanha in the east.

February 2025

Timeline of the Kolanos Gulf War
Prelude (up to 3 December 2024)
First Confrontation (1-15 December 2024)
Eastern Front (16 December 2024 - 8 February 2025)
Leihituan Counteroffensive (4 February - 8 April 2025)

4 February

Leihitu launch a counteroffensive attack in the northeast. They meet Kierahan defense force near Saparua.

5 February

Leihituan army breach Kierahan line of defense near Saparua. The army march on to liberated the town.

Pemecutan Government placed an embargo towards Kierahan oil and spices especially nutmeg and cloves which are their main export commodities.

6 February

Leihituan army raids the town of Saparua. Leihitu claim that the town had been left empty after the breach of the line of defense.

Keiraha government mock Leihituan advancement was because of taking advantage on Kieraha focus in the eastern front to liberated their territories. They can't face Kieraha when Kieraha is in full force.

7 February

Government of Samudera Darussalam from its Ministry of Foreign Affairs calls for a ceasefire.

Leihituan army march on to Namlea.

9 February

Kierahan air forces launch an air strike near Namlea as Leihituan army gathering their forces there. One of the bomb fell on Tomagoba Coal Power Plant which affected power supply in Namlea.

12 February

Kierahan defense force in Namlea took down several UAVs that were believes to be sent by Leihituan army stationed behind the town's line of defense.

14 February

Kieraha Government accuse Pemecutan to have provide Leihitu with arms and ammunitions.

Kieraha ask Sendhang Government to open their border for Kierahan refugee with the fall of Duko and Bacan.

15 February

Pemecutan Government denied Kierahan accusation, said that the government was not involved in the arms buy out by Leihituan Government. On the other hand, spokesperson of Kedungu Arms and Akasa Aviation Technology released statement that the order from Leihituan government were addressed directly, backing up the statement from their government.

17 February

Leihitu army breach the line of defense of Namlea. They were ready to enter the town. While Kierahan defense forces retreat into the town.

18 February

Battle ensued at the suburbs area of Namlea while Leihitu air force bombs the town to disperse the defense force.

Kieraha double their defense in Tiakur.

19 Februray

Octavianus Prima, the former Governor of Keise Islands and the initiator of Keise independence referendum, was found dead in his prison cell. According to Kierahan news agency, KBK (Kantor Berita Kieraha), he was dead because of heart failure.

Following the death of Prima, Tual people staged a demonstration throughout the town. Kierahan defense force use water canon to drive away the demonstrators.

21 February

Leihituan army breach the Kierahan defense of Namlea starting the occupation of the town.

Demonstrations in Keise Islands spread into Eliat and Langgur and to the main town of the other islands.

23 February

Pemecutan send aid to Keise Islands.

Some parts of Namlea were control by Leihituan army.

24 February

Demonstrators in Tual occupied the Governor House of Keise Islands. Pro-Kierahan and Acting Governor, Xavier Pervez was killed by the demonstrators.

26 February

Kierahan army land paratroopers in Tual to quell the demonstrators.

28 February

Leihituan army cornered Kierahan defense force in Namlea as they try to recapture the last part of the town.

March 2025

2 March

Namlea was liberated by Leihituan army. The remaining of Kierahan defense force retreat to nearby village.

Tual turn into an open battlefield as Kierahan paratroopers chase away all the demonstrators. They were either captured or killed on the spot. The event was then known as Tual Massacred.

3 March

Acastanhada, Sendhangite and Pemecutanian Governments reacted on Tual Massacred. They were all condemned the incident.

Sendhang Government denied entry of Kierahan refugee following the Tual Massacred.

4 March

Leihituan army is on the moves to Tiakur while their air forces had bombing the province to lowered the forces of Kierahan army.

6 March

Kierahan navy shoot down Pemecutanian hospital ship who brought foods and medical aid for Keisean.

7 March

Leihituan army reach the border of Barmola Province. They meet a heavy resistance from Kierahan forces.

9 March

Pemecutan government openly declare to send military aid to Leihitu and Acastanha following the sunken of their medical ship by Kierahan navy despite they were remain neutral.

Kierahan government mock Pemecutan government as 'Two Faces'.

10 March

People in the villages throughout Barmola raise arms to challenge Kierahan occupation.

11 March

Air battle happen above Barmolan sky between Leihitu and Kieraha air forces. The battle ended in stalemate as both parties suffer heavy loss.

12 March

Leihituan army success to enter Barmola border.

3 Barmolan villages near the border with Sendhang were liberated by their villagers as Kierahan army moves to Tiakur.

13 March

Pemecutan announced an aid military package to Leihitu which includes missiles, rocket launcher, trucks, UAVs and tactical vehicles.

16 March

Battle happen at the suburb of Tiakur following Leihituan operation to liberate the town.

17 March

Kierahan air forces randomly bombs areas within Barmola Province.

18 March

Leihituan army found a mass grave at the suburb of Tiakur.

19 March

Leihituan army made advancement into the town of Tiakur as they success to push Kierahan army.

24 March

Kierahan army became more and more desperate as the villagers helped by Leihituan army liberated one by one village of Barmola. Kieraha now only control the coastal and northeastern part of the province.

30 March

Kierahan army was encircled inside Tiakur as almost all of Barmola were liberated.

April 2025

3 April

Parts of Tiakur was recaptured by Leihituan army.

5 April

Naval battle happen off the coast of Gam Lammo as Acastanhada navy pass the area en route to Tiakur. The battle won by Acastanha as they success to sunk Kieraha main ship.

7 April

Kierahan army was cornered at the port area of Tiakur. They were blocked from 2 sides, Leihituan army from the land and Acastanha navy from the coast.

8 April

Kierahan army surrender. Tiakur was officially liberated.

Map of Kolanos Gulf after the Eastern Front

Legend:
Yellow = Acastanha
Purple = Kieraha
Orange = Leihitu
Stripes = Kierahan occupied land
Squared = Acastanhada occupied land

by **Aleirave** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 8:52 am

Turnaround

Losses to Myrtle Beach and Baker Park were definitely not ideal here.

Now, with only a record of just 2-1-4 and a measly sixth place to show for their "amazing" third seeding, it was clear that the discord between the two managers was starting to be a major burden on everyone involved... but how could they make a recovery here?

"Listen, Ivan, I know you want to see us winning, but... you really do have to hear me out here."
"What could you possibly say to make me happy right now--"

"Look, this team is struggling, and what they need right now is not your style of making them work ever-harder to achieve their-- no, your goals. If this arrangement is going to work out, you're going to need to listen to me about what this team wants. I've known them longer than you, I know what's best for them right now."

"And that would be?"
"They need management that shows them that they matter. They aren't just cogs in some machine, they're people who fall on hard times sometimes. They have slumps, and the right way to handle a slump isn't more work. It's motivation."
"And what sort of motivation are you trying to suggest?"

Ivan's question seemed simple here, but Haulafo was having a lot of trouble trying to answer it. What kind of motivation did this team need? Haulafo had managed this team in rough patches before, but once they were in a downward spiral, he was never able to get them out until at least the start of whatever the next tournament was. He didn't have a good answer.

"Just... let me go talk to them on my own, Ivan. I promise you this will work out."
"Will it?"
"Stop doubting me right now... I know I deserve a lot of doubt here but I just can't take it at the moment..."

The team's boat ride back to the island was oddly quiet. Haulafo knew there had to be a way to get this team back in the win column, but how?

"Listen up guys... so, that was rough. 6-2 to Baker Park wasn't a result I think any of us were expecting..."
"Tell me about it..." Falena Rukipiato said, "they were making me look silly out there!"
"Hey hey hey, nothing you did was that bad. So, we lost a bad one. It's time to recover. It's Rea San Vegas coming to the island next, and they've only got one point so far!"
"Which was a draw to Baker Park..." Ivefela Noselela noted.

"Yeah I don't really know how that one happened either... let's just ignore it and hope that doesn't come back to bite us. Anyway the point is that this is a team we know we can beat. We've done it before, we can do it again. Let's focus on keeping ourselves solid and getting back on our feet!"

The team didn't cheer this time around, like they usually did when Haulafo game a motivational speech. Instead, they just kinda shrugged, not believing a word he was saying. They'd lost hope, even if Haulafo still had it. It was a sad time to be a Seagull.

by **Squornshelan Remnant States** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 9:56 am

At the halfway point, the SRS finds itself with a record that, if not ideal, at first glance appears also not unexpected, and not a cause for alarm. They've amassed a respectable 5-1-1 record for 16 of 21 possible points. They've scored 23 goals in the process, and though a few other teams have equalled that mark through the first half of qualifying, only Banija have eclipsed it. This is in large part due to the outstanding performance from Sivolvia Capitalizt striker Rasha Sargsa, who has emphatically silenced doubters at home and abroad who preferred Snorre Fridtjofs for the starting role (and for the Tornadoes longlist). She has seven goals from five appearances so far, including a hat trick against Equestria, and shows no signs of slowing down. The next closest player on the roster is Tarbi Ksudach, whose tally of three pales in comparison, and behind him are three players with two, and seven with one each. It's uncertain exactly what lesson about the Red-and-Black attack to take away from this. Are they overly dependent on Sargsa, destined for a goal drought whenever her current red hot form cools off? Or does the distributed scoring, with 12 players on the score sheet, show that the team's attack is healthy, and someone else will be ready to step up when needed? Hard to say.

What can be said for certain is that despite the relatively good play to this point, it hasn't been enough. Quite surprisingly, Sajnur, 75th ranked side in the multiverse and fourth seeded team in Group 12, have taken wins against Pasarga, Ceni, and the SRS en route to a perfect first half of qualifying. Thus, while Pasarga and the SRS sit neck and neck, separated in the standings by a single goal, they quite unexpectedly sit in second and third, looking up at a team they both likely expected to beat. The group leaders have earned their position with an excellent defensive performance, keeping clean sheets in four of their seven matches, conceding goals only against Pasarga, the SRS, and in an off-form performance against the Salish Republic. Now, one certainly might point out that their two biggest wins were quite narrow affairs, and that both came at home, but until someone shows them to be human, Sajnur are now the team to beat in Group 12. Adding to the anxiety for Black-and-Reds supporters, a plane to Torgos awaits for the next matchday, where our team will face down the top seed once again, this time without the benefit of a friendly crowd.

While this was a match that many predicted before qualifying might prove decisive in determining who earned automatic qualification from Group 12, it looms all the larger given the current state of the group table. A draw gives Sajnur the opportunity to pull away even further, doing little good to either the Black-and-Reds or Wanderers. A winner will, of course, keep pace and hope to catch the leaders slipping, but the loser would find themselves quite suddenly three points out of playoff position with very limited opportunities to regain ground, given the shaky form that has plagued the teams in the bottom half of Group 12. While many might be looking ahead to the end of the schedule for the home rematch with Sajnur, this next match remains the most important on the schedule. Would a loss see Penrooke fired on the spot? Unlikely, but it could set the Black-and-Reds on a path leading, not toward Sylestone and Chromatika, but toward uncertainty.

SRS: 3
ATT: 0

Scoring:
SRS: Bondarov 18', Nedeljkovic 80, Volam 83
ATT: None

SRS Lineup: Shimski; Nyberg, Yarlut, Jagdish (Ludvicak 81'), Boesch; Hashemi, Tatsinan (Bernat 81'); Bondarov (Stern 78'), Volam (Saigir 89'), Koshelev; Fridtjofs (Nedljkovic 78')

SRS: 2
SAJ: 3

Scoring:
SRS: Sargsa 19', Avachinsky 62'
SAJ: Taylor 49', Ciuru 56', Naulo 87'

SRS Lineup: Blaha; Drenel, Van, Titov (Volam 89'), Norling; Sevet-Ibilx (Hashemi 78'), Saigir; Shakhnovich (Ksudach 59'), Avachinsky (Byqvist 78'), Aaltonen; Sargsa (Ness 89')

Qualifying Schedule and Results

FRND: SRS 0–1 SYL @ Slavnareczpospolitastadion (cap. 61,230), Lublova, Molvania, SRS

MD01: SRS 3–3 PAS @ Vogsphere Arena (cap. 90,000), Vogsphere, Isle of Squornshelous, SRS
MD02: EQS 4–7 SRS @ TBA
MD03: SRS 4–0 SLR @ Zenith Stadium (cap. 58,400), Stavromula, Isle of Squornshelous, SRS
MD04: MAR 2–3 SRS @ TBA
MD05: SRS 1–0 CEN @ Raftel Park (cap. 59,870), Chalesm, Megabrantis, SRS
MD06: SRS 3–0 ATT @ Olympiastad (cap. 47,550), Arkintoofle, Megabrantis, SRS
MD07: SAJ 3–2 SRS @ National Stadium (cap. 102,000), Javoser, SAJ
MD08: PAS  v  SRS @ Stade de Torgos (cap. 90,000), Torgos, PAS
MD09: SRS  v  EQS @ Pheldagrif Stadium (cap. 45,620), Yassaca, Sivolia, SRS
MD10: SLR  v  SRS @ TBA
MD11: SRS  v  MAR @ Castle Street (cap. 57,300), Jaglan, Algolia, SRS
MD12: CEN  v  SRS @ TBA
MD13: ATT  v  SRS @ TBA
MD14: SRS  v  SAJ @ Albrechtsson Park (cap. 65,400), Damogran, Algolia, SRS

by **Alasdair I Frosticus** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 10:36 am

OOC - let's try that again with the correct nation this time...

A REFLECTIVE ODE ON THE CHATGPT ODE

By Isaac, Prince Imperial
(the worst poet in the multiverse)

Blimey, artificial intelligence, eh?
I mean, what's it all about anyway?
And does the meaning of artificial intelligence
Change depending on the cultural and technological context?

Let's look at it this way...
If there was some sort of super-advanced civilisation, say,
Would their computer AI
Compare to our famous player Ug-Ug counting rocks?

Which of this is more or less artificial?
And is either of them more or less beneficial
When it comes to finding solutions
And stimulating thought

Alright, so the super-advanced computer
Might be a more effective trouble shooter
Than Ug-Ug's pile of counting rocks
But they're both artificial, right?

But let's at least agree on this much:
My poetry is more sophisticated and less of a soft touch
Than anything AI can generate
What, with those sloppy rhymes and metres.

And anything I wrote about the leading qualifying
And leading the group, not being low-lying,
Would win far more accolades
Than that silly little AI poem would. So there.

by **Xanneria** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 10:37 am

Xanneria dismantles Semarland 5-2
http://www.xtrasports.xan

DOMINICA CITY - Xanneria has had a very interesting time at the world cup qualifiers so far. In what has to be one of the strongest groups in recent memory, Xanneria has gotten paired up with a group that has former powers, such as Polar Island States, and Semarland, and current powers such as Kandorith, Darman and Farfadillis. Heck even a future power in Basel-Triesen has decided to be put in this group. A BoF winner rivalry brewing? Semarland though has participated in a couple of WCQs since Xanneria first started entering, their glory days were behind them. They came into this World Cup unranked and still looking to develop a group of players that could take them to height they once had in prior world cups.

Like Xanneria, Semarland tends to put out a varied roster with no true starting XI, and it can be harder to scout teams like this. But in the end Xanneria conquered Semarland 5-2 in a blowout that got testy. Xanneria put out the pair of red-hot Pete Ross and Tomas Napi out on the wings, with Allison Burnes in the middle. This trio proved to be a pain for the Semerland team to best, but they did get the first laugh as an early goal gave them, the Semarland national football team, a 1-0 lead. Xanneria did counter with an early-ish goal of their own, Napi got a pass from Bryse Papp in the penalty area and scored on a shot that JUST missed the fingers of Gaetano Jorgensen.

With two minutes of extra time added before half Xanneria was able to take advantage, an Allison Burns goal gave the Maroons a 2-1 lead before half. Semarland came back just before the hour mark to draw it up 2-2 when midfielder Chris Simmonds, who was making his debut (?) for his national team scored on a blaster from his right foot. It around that time though things got really testy. Xanneria has been notorious lax about tripping contact and other physical movements that other nations may find taboo. During the 75 minute mark Ranger Selltick intercepted a Kortney Delaware pass for Bismark Boetang, Delaware got layed out in the collison but the refs didn't call a yellow card. This caused some consternation amongst Semarland and it could be seen in the way they played. A very aggressive Semarland was not exactly what the doctor ordered, and you could tell after the collision that Semarland was a bit shook. In the end some late goals due to the unstable play of Semerland lead to a 5-2 for Xanneria.

XANNERIA - 5
Napi 17' 84'
Burns 45+1, 88'
Ross 77'

SEMERLAND - 2
Larsen 5'
Simmonds 57'

XANNERIA - 3
Ghilcrest 21'
Burns 30"
O'Hara 62' (OG)

DARMEN - 4
Lee 30' 39' 51'
Hale 14'

by **Tumbra** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 11:00 am

Christchurchon 0–2 Tumbra

TMB (4-2-3-1): 12 - R Russell; 28 - S Kemp (2 - A Renton, 82'), 4 - I Ashburn, 30 - M Hutchinson (24 - Y Lawson, 82'), 19 - J Green; 32 - L McCormick (8 - V Hicks, 74'), 16 - I Robertson, 10 - P Cole (35 - N Coleman, 74'); 7 - V Wells, 21 - A Pearson (37 - J Hardaker, 85'); 11 - N Riordan

TMB scorers: Nick Riordan (37'), Audrey Pearson (81')

Player of the Match: Nick Riordan (TMB)

Tumbra 4–2 Vdara

TMB (4-2-3-1): 1 - V Jones; 2 - A Renton (28 - S Kemp, 73'), 4 - I Ashburn, 5 - S Kerr, 3 - T Mercurio (19 - J Green, 73'); 6 - T Harrison, 8 - V Hicks (32 - L McCormick, 80'), 10 - P Cole (16 - I Robertson, 80'); 7 - V Wells, 9 - L Crossley (21 - A Pearson, 83'); 11 - N Riordan

TMB scorers: Nick Riordan (16', 69'), Phil Cole (32'), Lynne Crossley (54')

Player of the Match: Nick Riordan (TMB)

Previously...
In this RP, an enterprising reporter finds out about a plot to spill the Prime Minister, Stephen Williams. The main conspirator is the former Law and Justice Minister, and archconservative, Lawrence Newell; who's planning to move the governing centre-right Liberal Party to the right, ally with a fellow centre-right figure, Max Young, who ran for President formerly on a platform of federalism and who has since set up his own political party.

MPs usually had their selection of evening entertainment; after all, they were usually well-to-do and needed somewhere to rest after whatever work was considered parliamentary. While most had apartments in Tumbra's capital city of Straton, and increasingly MPs stayed home — less chance of being pelted by eggs by some ne'er do well on the street — a few preferred gentlemen's clubs, a long-held tradition. There were still a few dotted around the capital, though their numbers had been shrinking, kept up by only the true upper class (after all, the landed aristocracy had disappeared after 1871, when fighting had effectively ended, though many of today's rich could count at least one or two barons, viscounts or the like amongst their ancestors). And that included MPs.

Lawrence Newell sat, inhaled a bit from a cigar, and exhaled, while waiting for a friend. Politely taking a plate of hors d'oeuvre — Westmond smoked salmon with pickles and a little bit of butter — from a passing waiter, he continued working on some constituency business. To be very fair, it was all he had after being dismissed from Cabinet after he'd challenged the Prime Minister a few years ago; since then, largely ignored, he'd been busying himself for a return to the big stage. And what better time was there than now?

The party had slipped in the polls. The Liberals had been bleeding support, but not to their traditional centre-left rivals, Labour. Labour had finished the 2033 election with 36.6%; they'd been holding steady in the polls since then. The Liberals had finished that election with 42.1%, the highest vote share for a winning party in about a decade, and one which surprised the statisticians and commentators at its scale. It hadn't translated into an overwhelming majority — the party, together with the Nationals, its traditional coalition partner, had barely scraped over the 326 seats required for an overall majority, and had continued governing in tandem with the centrist Moderates to make themselves more secure.

Then the Nationals left — a personal conflict over the two parties' roles in the coalition — and the government had been scrabbling, day by day, vote by vote, to survive. That was about the time Max Young's Federalist Movement had appeared; carrying over from a nearly-successful presidential run which had basically forced the government to shelve its plans to flatten the number of states in the country from 25 to 10. And from there, support had bled. First it was three; then five, then ten, and now the Federalist Movement — which had now gotten into bed with the Nationals, effectively giving them parliamentary representation — was now averaging about fifteen points in the polls.

Newell furrowed his brow as he made notes on a constituent's request for aid. He made a note to his secretary to advance the constituent's case to the relevant Ministry, and took another puff of his cigar. He didn't smoke in public, but gentlemen's clubs were known for their discretion, anyway, and privacy was generally respected. He'd crossed paths with some MPs from other parties here — all male, of course — and apart from a cursory nod of recognition, had never said anything to each other. He put the document down and picked up another; it was an opinion poll.

NATIONAL: LAB 38 (314) LIB 29 (235) FED-NAT 14 (77) ALL 11 (14) MOD 6 (7) SDP 2 (3)
PESVERN: LIB 40 (4) FED 31 (4) LAB 20 (0) MOD 5 (0) ALL 3 (0) SDP 1 (0)
HOLSWORTH: LIB 43 FED 26 LAB 19 MOD 8 ALL 4
TPP: LIB 55 FED 45

The first row was a national result; Labour would win 314 seats, according to the result of the poll, on 38% of the vote. The second row and down was more relevant to Newell personally; he was the MP for Holsworth in Pesvern, while the last row showed the preference vote result. He wasn't in danger of losing his own seat — he had a strong personal vote, but seeing that (235) next to the 29 in the national poll ticked him off. That would mean over eighty of his colleagues losing their seats; an unacceptable outcome for the party. That was why he was here.

The door to the bar opened. In strode the person he was meant to meet; without saying a word, Max Young threw off his coat, handed it to the doorman, and sat down opposite Newell, who put away most of his papers into his briefcase and extended a handshake, with a calming smile. It was reciprocated, of course, but Young looked not very pleased to be here. Somewhat understandable, since Young was based in Kingsbury, the city where he'd once been a political titan; and it was very late at night.

"Lawrence," began Young, eschewing most formality. "Let's start."

"Of course. I've asked to meet you tonight because I have a proposition for you. We've both seen the polls, we're not idiots." Newell slid over the slip of paper containing the poll results to Young, who took a glance which elicited a confirmatory nod from him. "I want us to work together."

"Williams won't agree. Nor will Hinchcliffe," Young waved his hand, referring to the National Party's leader which had precipitated the governing crisis in the first place.

"Williams won't be a problem, and Hinchcliffe will appreciate a return to the fold."

"You're not saying..." Young seemed to catch on immediately as to Newell's plan.

"Yes. We knife him, I run and win, and then we reconcile, and we avoid this ugly outcome."

"How would the split work out?"

"Open primary. We merge."

"Under the Liberal name?"

"I'm willing for it to be under an entirely new one. Heaven knows 'Liberal' doesn't even describe us anymore. It certainly doesn't describe me. We could nick National from the farmers. Make them feel like they're being sucked off while everything's pinched from under their noses."

Young chuckled. He sat back in his seat for a bit, considering the prospect. "Names...can come later. It's just window-dressing."

"Understandable."

"An open primary, though? I want my people in there as well. Your people will have incumbency and name advantage. I don't want to be prime minister on a castle of sand." Young was showing his naked ambition for the post of Prime Minister now — a rookie mistake, but then again, nobody said politicians actually had to be good at politics.

Newell sank his own fingers into the sofa. "Open primaries would be the fairest; it wouldn't be anything officially organised, so we can skip the bureaucracy. But yes, open primary. Especially when it comes to the leadership."

"You'd be willing?"

"To let it go to our voters? Yes."

"Strangely chivalric of you."

"Think of it as a courtesy. For willing to join forces. On one condition, of course; the leadership would be for the 2035 election and beyond."

"That's fair." Young smirked. "I suppose you want some time to play."

"I would think so, yes." Newell's knuckles sank deeper into the sofa. How dare Young assume he'd win. Newell was only offering this because he knew he would win. "Whomever loses becomes deputy."

"Of course, of course. I'll need some time to think things over, of course," said Young, oblivious to Newell's tranquil fury. "And this is of course contingent on you spilling Williams. And winning. Wouldn't want the same thing to happen like last time."

"Of course not. Him or McKenzie. Winds have changed. Neither of them are likely to win an election. I am, with you." Paul McKenzie was Tumbra's Foreign Minister; and was widely regarded as the PM's closest ally. "McKenzie is a political lugnut. No skill. Nothing. He'll be easy pickings. Williams is not surviving a spill with these poll numbers."

"So what do I need to do?" Young asked.

"Just attack the government. Williams, specifically. Difficult to attack foreign policy, which is why I presume he moved McKenzie there, to lube him up for a run at the premiership. Just attack them for anything that's not that. Soft on crime, immigration, the economy, handouts, federalism, whatever sticks. I'm sure there's a political storm somewhere that can be exploited. You're friends with the Harrison family, yes? Whatever you can give me will be the blade with which I'll topple him."

Young nodded. "I'll send something in black-and-white, but in the meantime..." He proffered his hand again. "To the future."

Newell smiled as he took Young's hand in his, and shook it too. "To the future."

by **Qasden** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 12:39 pm

Promises Akimbo
Midpoint of Qualifiers bring Retrospection into Efforts
By Wallace Wallows
7 matches spare Qasden from their present and future, but with the unexpectedly expected becoming the norm, the arrival of the unbridled Manage'Rex is leaving more apathy than ebullience.
Hindsight in partial totality, following up a pair of decent campaigns under a household name with the appointment of the Vans' most loyal and critical fan seemed less like a bridge between supporter and organization and more like a shotgun wedding between a hastily applied band-aid and a "You think you can do it better? Prove it." attitude from the suits. Sure, Akimbo was regarded as a talented coach within the walls of the delightfully elitist 'QAFAcademy', but the top job with significantly more jaded individuals to manage is a mountain of a task in of itself, more so under the bountiful harvest of journalists hiding their joviality of a click-worthy exposé with every tap on their assorted, press-sanctioned devices.

Still, this is what Marlene wanted out of a Post-Munson National Team, and it was only a matter of time before her wits would turn them to a different chapter.
The hooligan manager finds himself leading a defense-oriented squad into the land of no promises: World Cup 95, drawn against nations familiar and un so, almost like the Principality has done since the dawn of time. What better way than to start the campaign against a team who really feels like they derive from the start of everything? Butt-breading the qualifier loaf is an away day to the formerly-recently war torn empire of Zenic, a returning country from Pre-Merritt times. The 55th Baptism of Fire champions welcomed the Vans to the Philosophia Colosseum in in Manacus, a gargantuan showpiece of a stadium, its size akin to the levels of jealously felt amongst the RTS loyal. Despite the fears of failure, the campaign started off with a positive note, Calcio Calico's newborn 4-5-1 formation profited from a near lack of goals against in their debut, save a single instance in which the phalanx broke. Still a brace from veteran Bone and a beauty from XI newcomer, Alice Sauvage, started the schedule with a smittering of 3 points.

The following match results were not sanctioned by the QAFA Victory Committee.

Triumph abroad gave way to a slogfest at home against the primary target for qualification usurpation: Brookstation. The Dreamers' aggro-style of play would be a defining test to the Akimbo-Vandelhaar strategy, and while defense really did hold up for most of the match, a single rogue past Thurstan at the 83rd would sap all the energy Royal T.V. Stadium could muster. The defeat seemed unpreventable in the eyes of hungry sportsbookers, but it still shook the team enough to suffer their greatest loss of goals yet in its immediate aftermath, dropping 3 goals at the Parade Grounds in Oberour Ar Moro, ultimately losing another critical match despite Otero's attempts to capitalize. Some grace was granted at the Hotchskarth Cabin, thankfully, as the Vans downed newcomer Shieldstan in a confident 2-0, but the next match would display a disastrous take on role reversal.

Group giants Audioslavia, despite all the charm and awe their name and merchandise display, has weirdly been the infinite money glitch in the system for the principality in cycles past, with all 5 former encounters resulting in a narrow 1-0 victory for the Qads. Things like this shouldn't happen, though the near-Belle Haven level stigmas being generated in the bullish republic were pretty funny to watch. So when the Qads stepped back into the Beltzarga, the thoughts of defeat were slightly tinged in rigmarole. Defense proved a valuable factor early on, but confidence waned over the 90 minutes as the Vans struggled to find that plot armor sole goal. 73 minutes in, however, the crowd would erupt, as Audioslavia defied the history and flipped the script on Qasden, getting the golden goal through to end an enchanting hex 5 encounters strong. On stats alone, this really should've been coming. You can't just waltz into the house of the 3-1-0, 23rd-ranked nation of yore and expect an easy 3. Still, losing tradition stings, and with it, the last mental safety latch in this experiment was unhooked. The Qads needed 9 points out of the Pots 1, 2, and 4 teams to stay viable, and yet they were only able to avoid being shutout by the latter, which even then still left us strung pointless between that trio.

Qasden rebounded with Ancherion, an ever-present entrant with an appealing color scheme. The match within the Interior, the Riverbound nation's region with a suspicious lack of river, finally gave the Vans' defense the credence it needed to avoid dropping points, though a lone Bone can only score so much, needing the assistance of captain Orville to bring on the delayed 1-0 win we had expected prior. A hollow victory in the eyes of some, but one we couldn't question its necessity so deep into qualifiers. Another came through abroad, as a calico-wrapped Qad team would finally make some good headway in the form of a dominant 4-0 victory over Saperetia, including a worldie from IFCF CL winner and captain prospect, Lor Starcutter.

So at the eye of the perils, where do we stand? 12 points against the 4 lowest potted teams in the table keeps up treading water in 3rd place, a point above the Oberours and four below the playoff-gatekeeping Audioslavians. While nowhere near as bad as the direction some expected it to go post-Beltzarga, one couldn't help but wonder what goals bringing in Akimbo and a new format was supposed to bring? Obviously it wasn't goals on the ground, with Qasden getting shutout twice and only getting a home victory beyond a single goal once. Surely the prize of these efforts isn't a defense that dropped 5 goals before stopping one for a full 90 minutes? Qasden is soon due for their returning leg against the Survivors of Zenic, needing to get tuned up in time before expecting to venture out to Dreamland and win some points back. Thankfully, we have a resort for that, and one that's sure to go to a good cause. Hopefully it'll bring the Vans out of their mental rut, or at least be neat enough to give a charity worker a big check. Can the Vans rescue a campaign before it goes down the shitter? Will Akimbo's contract run as fast as that of a forgotten Boulevard Drucati? Stay tuned, stay updated, and stay alert for better times and worser rhymes, live from the midpoint between beginning and end of the 95 Campaign!

by **Savojarna** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 12:45 pm

SAVOJARNAS DAGBLADET -- INTERNATIONAL
Savojarna’s prime news source for international readers

IAS Tragedy in Quebec - What Happened?
Reneegrad/QUE; Värstjö/Vestrholm - The most devastating accident in Savojar aviation history leaves a nearly fully loaded NFK Rotor R72 plane of International Air Service Savojarna (IAS) lost in the waters off Quebec and Shingoryeo. The plane had left on one of IAS’s direct services between Reneegrad International and Sjoedrhavn, which had only been established ten months ago. The flight had reached cruising conditions over the sea off the Quebecois coast when it sent a radio message declaring an emergency, and disappeared from radar shortly after. IAS have communicated the flight was nearly fully booked, amounting to 297 passengers on the list. With the plane having crashed over open sea, it is unknown whether there are survivors, with Quebecois rescue teams currently conducting a search in the last known area of the plane. There is as of now no record of the causes or witnesses of the incident.

SavNews // Published 27. August 02:38 SDT

Terrible Suspicion Surrouding IAS Tragedy
Sjoedrhavn/Vestrholm - One and a half days after the crash of an IAS R72 from Reneegrad International to Sjoedrhavn, en route off the Quebecois coast, there are still few news about potential causes of the crash. The biggest lead so far has come from the crew of a cargo ship in the area, who reported a loud bang and the fall of three or four flaming parts, before they reported what looked like the break of the plane in the air. Meanwhile, the passenger list of the flight revealed some of the identities of the missing people. Among the passengers of the plane have been Vitali Poligin, the leader of the LKPS group in the National Assembly, with his family, as well as his vice chairman and personal friend Piotr Ostiugov and his wife. Furthermore, board members of Savojar automotive giants Johansborg Motor Collective and Landsmarks Automobilen have both been on board, according to the collectives on a work trip to liaise with potential Quebecois suppliers.

Given the prominence of some passengers, the sudden failure of the plane, and the general mystery surrounding the circumstance, terrible suspicions have surfaced online quickly and were repeated last night in a press conference by Executive Commissioner for Transportation Eirikur Tyrgeirsson (KPS): Has sabotage brought down flight SJ492? “We have not received decisive indications for any cause of the catastrophe having taken place off the Quebecois Coast. Savut sources have indicated that there has been strife in the Adyati upper ranks in the wake of the incapacitation of PM Vasily Svetanov, and warned us that radical elements within the Adyati Army may reach extreme means to create an opportune political situation”, he said. “We cannot confirm in any way that Adyati forces have been involved with Flight 492, but we cannot exclude the option at this moment. It is rare for planes to disappear immediately, and we are doing our best to achieve closure and justice for the passengers and their families”, Eirikur further.

Investigations of the Quebecois forces are ongoing, and Eirikur has announced his department has taken up connections with the Quebecois authorities to join the investigation. Meanwhile, IAS chairman Lasse Eilsberg has expressed his support to the families of those on board the flight, but refused to give any substantive comments of his institution’s role in the crash or the causes for it. “IAS deeply regret these events. This is the largest nightmare of anyone in aviation, and we are hoping for the best. Our thoughts and prayers are with the search and rescue missions of the Quebecois authorities, and with the families of those on board the flight. We are hoping with you that your loved ones will be found, and will be found alive. Our internal investigations will await the result of the Quebecois authorities, and we will ensure to use this incident to increase the safety of our flights”, stated Eilsberg at a joint press conference.

SavNews / tpe // Published: 28. August 17:43 SST

Daily Headlines

LKPS chairman Lanjev recalls all MNA’s from upcoming Assembly session in mourning, calls to suspend session

Adyati PM’s health continues to deteriorate, inside sources claim

NTU Pawlograd scientists announce major breakthrough in producing a more cold-resilient grain variant that could do wonders to address food security in Savojarna

by **Brookstation** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 1:14 pm

Coup d'e Football: Brookstation's Darkest Football Season

A Beautiful Game special

Continuing from exactly where we left off

Yeah we are progressing along the same lines. These are the reasons which make the tournament (Harrison Shield) more controversial than the other editions because despite the immediate dictatorship, the tournament progressed. There were several possibilities of stuff going wrong but keeping in mind all the possible perils, the show went on.

Aight, now that we have a clear idea of the political scenario during the season, let us consider the footballing aspect of this entire tyranny. So what real life implications did the rule have on football ? Did it like alter our footballing identity in any way or for instance was the government aware of the ongoing tournaments ?

This is especially the point which has a direct corelation with my field of work-carefully constructing the line where politics and football merged. While researching on football in Brookstation, one is bound to realise the position that football as a sport holds in Brookstation. Apart from undoubtedly being the most popular sport in the country, it is more of an identity you know, intertwined with the a sense of national recognition. This is most probably due to the Rushmori influence, due to which we see this passion among footballing nations of Rushmore in general.
To understand the basic scenario in a bit more detail, you need to understand the philosphy behind the game. In the pretext, Brookstation was essentially overlooked as a weak, irrelevant counrty by other nations; we were still in the process of development. On the other hand, football as a sport, since the inauguration of the World Cup has been considered as a symbol of modernity, an indication of progress. Although, the efforts to actually try to appear in the global scenario started out much later, the regime was probably one of the forerunners of ensuring the position of football in Brookstation as it is seen today. Understand Anderson, that the junta, no matter how bad it might have been, had great nationalstic ambitions. So basically in order to promote the overall status of the nation, the military instead undertook efforts to promote the game. There used to be frequent advertisements, more national broadcast, more sponsors and what not. In fact, it is said that legends of the 80s like Pucci and Cohen were especially close to the government.

Right so I believe that somewhere down the line, the military noticed how football influenced and united the masses together and affected society in general and these were the reasons which led them to adpot better facilities for football because somehow they knew that football could be used a key tool to bring people together, bring people in favour of their very questionable regime itself. Okay so we have talked quite about the politics and stuff but what about the locations, stadiums, pictures, clubs ? Anything interesting about that ?

Yeah, I mean there is this thing which a lot of people talk about and that is- how close the stadiums were to the torture centres or the camps where hundreds of young protestors and government officials were imprisoned. For instance, the Glass Animal Park itself in the capital was probably only two blocks away from one of the infamous government detention centre, which basically served as one of the military schools. Stories also extend to prisoners being able to hear the commentatory from the nearby stadias. Now, many of these accounts are sometimes more exaggerated, which heavily reduces its credibility but it is true that in less urban areas like Scroton, Morioh and Kars, these bulidings which served as torture camps were located fairly in close proximity of the stadiums and so some of these stories are definitely true. This is definitely sad considering how the opposition was treated in general.
So there is this one particular story about one of the imprisoned journalist, I can't really recall his name but if I am not mistaken it was probably John or James Shaw. So this person was taken to the stadium by the police forces and was you know kind of forced a game, most probably the one between Artiana and Other side of Paradise. However, the entire purpose behind doing this was to bring him in front of the crowd to recognize his family or friends and as soon as anybody from the crowd waved and asked him "Hi John, how's it going?", they would be arrested.

Okay, so one thing is that I am trying to comprehend from the beginning is how did it all this happen. Like subconsciously, I still can't try to paint a picture of the horrific accounts that you just mentioned but even if we leave these torture centres and all apart, for it is quite evident in a dictatorship but the main question is how did footballers manage to walk up to the stadium and play in front of the crowd when there was this constant fear surrounding the public and there was the counter...sorry not counter but you know the mistrust among people. Like I heard from people, neighbours turned up against each other and every citizen turned into a spy. So how did they just manage to focus on football in the midst of all this ?

I know right, this is something which fascinated me as well and it is here where it actually gets kind of interesting. I think one thing that's true is that majority of the people were unaware of these camps or centres in the first place. We got to learn about these only after the end of the short regime but while the junta had power, they heavily prioritized censorship, which meant that most of their shady activities were concealed in the long run. They controlled media and as I said they supported football in any form so they always made an attempt to divert the attention of the masses towards sports and other less important topics. Yet despite all these horrors, they had confidence, the support of the people. It is difficult to guess the extent to which the masses actually knew but despite the frequent bombings and assassinations, people didn't really object to them as such because at the end of the day, their security was being ensured by the people.

Right I get your point; it is really difficult to saw what had happened then or what actually influenced these people to tolerate the injustices but in the entire tournament, who do you think were the important figures ?

If there is one important figure, it has to be the President General Nicolo Belluci, who had an unusual visibilty throughout the whole season. As they say, he was more seen in the pitches than in his own office. His constant presence in the games was a clear indication that whatever happened in the matches mattered seriously. The man had some balls, I must admit. Standing there, in front of millions during the opening ceremony and undertaking a pledge to go ahead with the season in the name of peace and unity..these are things, you just can't imagine these days. There are also several reports suggesting that the games were rigged in favour of Essidise, which happened to be both the birth place and the favourite club of Belluci himself. Belluci would go on record to say that Essidise is his favourite club and co-incidentally enough the tournament was bagged by none other than Essidise themselves. So the President did play a very important role throughout. He even ensured that almost all important roles of the Federation were occupied by members of the junta, so almost half of the Federation lost their jobs.

You bring up a very interesting point here, the rigging aspect. That is something that even I have heard of, from all sorts of places and I think it is another very important aspect which makes this season all the more interesting. I think there is quite a lot about Essidise and you know how Nicolo Belluci had a role to play in all of this.

Oops. That seems to be the end of your daily 20 minute free trial. Tune in tomorrow to listen to the rest of the podcast or subsribe to The Beautiful Game at just 35$ per month for more exciting football content without any restriction.

(To be continued)

by **Bostopia** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 1:15 pm

External publishing permitted

Bostopian Visit to Ochre Islands Attacked!
Fired upon by aggressive, expanding Ko-oren state and Mertagne

Word has finally gotten out as to why the Bostopian diplomatic visit to the Ochre Islands some four years ago ended in failure: it was fired upon by Ko-orenite and Mertagnian forces. The Ko-orenites, who have of course only recently gained a navy, were pointed at in testimony from Bostopian sailors and soldiers that it was they who fired first and that our brave Bostopian servicemen then had no choice but to return fire and make swift landfall on the easternmost of the Ochre Islands.

This exchange of fire came at a time of heightened and sustained volcanic activity, so Bostopia was unable to send more troops in to defend her diplomatics and their escorts from the attacks of Ko-oren and Mertagne. This newspaper contacted the offices of The Duke himself on the situation, who provided us with this statement.

'The diplomatic trip to the Ochre Islands was set up by my chum to smooth relations over between Bostopia and the Ochre Islands. It was evident that the Ochre population had seen the television series 'Bostopia: The Twin Isles' and become a little bit worried of their presense. Of course, Bostopia has always been in Anaia so any reference to any characters in the show like the my chum the Emperor waging war on them and vowing eternal revenge against the Ochres in whatever multiverse he finds himself in are just lines from whoever the screenwriter was at the time.

I, The Duke, am of course proud that the Bostopian diplomats and Government officials managed to assume temporary control over some of the eastern Ochre Islands as a result of them becoming cut off from Bellflower following the volcanic activity, and what we can only assume was Ko-orenite and Mertagnian pressure on the Ochre Prime Minister, Willow Offinchley, or 'of the Finches' as she prefers to be known, not to seek to speak to us but instead allow them to instead use our brave Bostopian troops as target practice.

From what I am told, Bostopian calls for a ceasefire and talks to explain their position went at best unheard and at worst ignored - Ko-oren and Mertagne will claim heavy radio inteference from the volcanic eruptions and so on prevented comms, but without them they still managed to co-ordinate attacks on temporarily-administered Bostopian positions in the Ochres very well, which I think is telling.'

The opinion of this newspaper - and that of Bostopians across the country, who are of course now facing an unprovoked Mertagnian attack - is that foreign governments are seeking to paint Bostopia in their own colours, whilst attempting to whitewash away the real truth.

by **Trolleborg** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 1:53 pm

Greetings, compatriots!
It’s TTV with another installments of our mini-review of films presented on Second Sporting Film Festival.

First one will be “Merger”. This film is dedicated to a hypothetical possibility, about which much has been said: the unification of all teams somehow connected with the armed forces of our country, many of which still bear the names of those branches of the military that once represented, sometimes in the distant, distant past, long ago before the founding of the football league - “slingers”, “cavalry”, “axe-bearers”, “knights” are the most notable of them. Perhaps, in terms of genre, the film is closer to tragedy than to anything else, and there are an abundance of interactive elements that can seriously corrected the plot, and the viewer will not be able to be only a spectator, it is he who will make most of the difficult decisions. Which of the honored veterans, fan favorites, who gave their best years to their teams, should be transferred, shouldered out to play remain time in the lower leagues, or be forced to hang up their boots early. Who of the young players, who yesterday were still planning their future as part of a team in one of the first two divisions, are promising, and who are not, and will now moved on the cold to try prove something to themselves at the third or fourth level. Finally, which of the three coaches will lead the new club and what will happen to the others. And then you have to see the result of this painful process on the field, and it is not always inspiring – bitter price for making difficult decisions you must make. Many viewers, however, criticized the film, and rightly so, for the fact that the plot took a lot from a literary drama printed fifty years ago, which described a similar process when two clubs of the same city merged together, and the real merger of several teams almost a hundred years ago. Realities of our time are definitely somewhat different. This smoothes out the burden of unpleasant choice and living with that choices you made, for many sports and movie fans, and in this film what you must to do is painful very often.

And the second one today will be a “We fight bravely for our flag”, film of a rather special nature. Our selection of films has already included both domestic and foreign films, but this one was made by Trolleborg filmmakers while using foreign material. It is based on a real, and not so long ago, story - a team that represented their country at one of the major tournaments, and was staffed by participants of the eSports championship - mostly overweight, not very well prepared physically, professing a rather strange style of football, undoubtedly suitable for their favorite line of sports games, but looking strange on the real field. The authors of the film, according to them, conducted a thorough study of this story, interviewed its characters, delved into the cultural traditions of the country, and claim that they reflected everything that is possible for the mind and feelings to know properly. Must be said, that name is line from poetry of this country, roughly translated in style of old Trolleborg versification. And something very strange happened: the comedy elements is undoubtedly present, but the characters take their responsibilities so seriously and push so hard while trying to fulfill them that, perhaps, you see in this film not the irony and comedy, but overcoming of what seems impossible to overcome.

by **Mertagne** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 2:06 pm

A cabal of people dressed in green and brown robes hold their hands in a circle, damp moss enveloping their bare feet and dripping slightly from their hands, which are clasped alongside those that stand next to them. A gristly green glow can be felt from the centre of the circle, and a figure stands, arms raised, within it - but it is too dark to see who this or any of the other attendees are.

In this leyline criss-crossed heart of pines,
We beseech you now, our souls entwined.
Adorned the moss upon our burn-ed palms
and prayed to powers previously becalmed.

Grant us a fraction of this divine grace,
As we seek to protect this sacred space.
Invaders seek to ruin from skies above,
And cut our way of life off from your love.

We recognise our debt to you is vast,
As you have fed and warmed us when we’ve asked.
As such we seek in time to pay our debt,
But know our offering ain’t ready yet.

In two days we’ll complete the ancient rite,
Sending our sacrifice into the night.
We ask that you reveal the blessed sign,
That we may do right by the sacred Pine.

A forest dance, a ritual profound
In hidden glades, where silence reigns asound.
Bring to there the profane scented bark,
That upon which is set the sacred mark.

An altar waits, dressed up with climber’s twist,
Here set your gift three ghurries ‘fore first mist.
Adorn them with the treated moss of yore,
And place my young beginners ‘round the floor.

Recite the incantations that I took,
From Salmoxis, delivered thee by book.
A simple rite - just hold it in the air,
I assure you my friends will be there.

Plunge a silvered axe into the heart
Of your gift and split their soul apart.
This blow must be scored throughout the bark,
And I will gladly crawl out from the dark.

Pine bestows their gifts on those who see
That all the forest wants is just to be.
People, like fleas, are fine when they are few,
But if I start to itch I’ll come for you.

A dark, branch-like hand emerges from the darkness, grabbing you and pulling you deep into the forest.

Bryan woke with a jolt on the cold, hard floor of the barn. It was still the dead of night. No sounds apart from the rustling of the pigs.

Was that a bad dream or an omen?

by **Elmyia** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 2:11 pm

The Overlap Podcast

John Wood: Hello listener. Another deeply odd international break, but 2 more bog wins for Elmyia. To digest it all with me, as ever, it's Iain McLeod. Hello Iain

Iain: Hello John

John: Elmyia's performances in one word?

Iain: ... Reasonable

John: Also joining us, Maria Wright, your word Maria?

Maria: Hi John, I'd have to say... Rossi.

John: That would be a fair word to pick. Well listener, Elmyia in action twice and identical scorelines. First came a trip away to Frontiere, who with only 6 points so far were not in great form. A 4-1 followed, as Elmyia put 4 goals past them, Rossi returning to the lineup to bag a brace, before Leclair bagged a consolation goal off the wing. St. Jean-Jacques-et-Burnham-on-Stove then travelled to Mosse Park for a highly anticipated fixture. A goal 2 minutes in Goudreau-Luneau put the opposition 1 ahead and it looked like it might be a tense evening. A hattrick for Rossi, with goals in the 17^th, 31^st and 50^th minutes, settled the nerves before an Aaron McLoughlin header settled matters.

So... Maria, how did Elmyia look in these matches?

Maria: yeah much improved. I think there's been a feeling in recent weeks that maybe their foot hadn't quite hit the gas. But we all remember from the 94 qualifying campaign that a slow start gave way to a relentless run of wins. I'm not saying that this will necessarily happen again, but on the evidence of these two games you have to think if they can keep this up then they'll be well set to qualify.

Iain: I'd agree. I think though, there's been one pretty big difference compared to the last qualifying campaign, and that's strength in depth.

John: Yes, now, is this something we need to credit Porras with, or has he been a little lucky that competition for places is developing?

Iain: I mean, yeah, obviously he's benefited really from his best players moving abroad. That's done two things really, players like Beaugemont, Simmons and Silva have all really improved having received coaching abroad. The other thing it's done is let players like Garavakos and Beresford to really develop at the best clubs domestically, and you can see it in how they're playing.

John: But he's still had to make use of them hasn't it?

Iain: Yes, of course, he's done well to bed them into the team. It's gone slightly unheralded, the change to starting Benedetti and Beaugemont in the biggest games, but it seems to be clicking now. Then, just as that works, Rossi comes back in despite being a little off form and delivers two pretty devastating displays.

Maria: He looked he had a point to prove I think. It would be great if he could keep up this purple patch for scoring.

John: Yeah, that's not what we've usually known him for.

Maria: No, he's often played provider. I think, really, he's been the victim of Whittingham's scoring form being slightly reduced. That gave Benedetti a route back with the form he's been in, then it made sense to bring Beaugemont in as more of a goal scorer than provider.

Iain: Yeah, I suppose you have the complete winger in Froggatt on the other wing, if Rossi can do the same it opens the options up, Whittingham, Benedetti or even Gabbiadini up top.

John: Who do we think he goes with long run?

Maria: I don't think he entirely needs to choose just yet, right? Horses for courses is an approach that could work.

Iain: I'd agree. I think really you could pick the winger based on what you need for the centre-forward. Whittingham, you want supply, especially with Froggatt there as well. She'll get up against the opposition line, take balls down, spray it to the wingers and whatnot. Benedetti, you want runners ahead of him really. But, with his current form you might think Rossi could hold his place.

John: McLoughlin as well has received some praise too. With Simmons in the lineup, do you think he'll ever find a route through?

Maria: I mean, I can't see past Simmons, I don't think it was McLoughlin's fault, but you wonder if the consolation against Frontiere happens with Simmons on the pitch?

Iain: I'd agree that he's not likely to break through into the lineup. Having a capable backup should Simmons pick up a knock is great, but a solid game against a nation ranked outside the top 200, then a 10 minute cameo against St.-Jean-Jacques-et-Burnham-on-Stove when the game was already settled aren't exactly enough to displace the side's best player.

John: Excellent, well Elmyia not go into the second half of qualifying ensconced in second place. But... it's not been quite so simple for everyone. Cassadaigua, 6 points short of a play-off place, Banija stuck down in second and 4 off The Holy Empire, Graintfjall in second and Nephara outside their top three. It seems like more shocks than usual, is it really Iain?

Iain; Certainly it does seem that there's been slightly more shocks than usual this time round. Essentially, I'd say it's a variance thing. We'd expect these teams to be pushing for qualification, but they usually get more games before we hit the halfway mark. Ultimately, one unfortunate result so far could really knock a team off their stride. Really, I'm assuming that most of them will make at least the play-offs.

Maria: I'm assuming Cassadaigua are the ones we should really be worried for?

Iain: Yeah, I mean they're well off where we'd expect them to be, only 9 point so far. They've also not won in 4 now, a defeat to Carpathia and Ruthenia who are outside the top 100, really concerning. The opening defeat to Yakk was not a great portend.

John: What do they seem to think the issue is here?

Iain: Well, it's interesting, Alexander Pappas came back, having previously led them to World Cup 50 and 51. They went on to win the Copa Rushmori 43, so really expectations had been fairly high. The lineup's experienced as well, it's hardly a team of neophytes. I'd be concerned that there's little to connect the defeats together, I wouldn't say they've fallen down to any specific system of way of playing against them. Sometimes confidence goes out of a lineup and that makes individual errors more likely.

Maria: I'd be more worried if that was the case for my side. If there's a clear weaknesses you can try to address it, turning a team's confidence round is tricky.

John: Out of the rest, do we imagine Graintfjall are missing a certain Erin Marshlily? Could she come back into the squad?

Maria: I would think they would miss her, player of her talent. They obviously have some strong backup, Danny Oddkellsson has been very good in midfield the last couple of matches, but they can't keep relying on him forever. Hrútur seems more of a blocker, and seems to be being phased out of the lineup.

Iain: I have to say I don't love the system too much either. A 4-3-1-2 seems to be where they've settled, that doesn't give much in the way of width without the centre-forwards vacating the centre, or the full-backs getting really far forward. I don't think that's helped, but ultimately they've done enough to suggest they'll still make it to the tournament. Why are you in here and Tanirinthia have both shown there's a way round them as well, both used plenty of width and could get in behind the full-backs which was telling.

John: Well, well, well, other people's problems, let's not borrow trouble. And that's all we have time for, see you soon listener.

by **Ochre Islands** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 2:14 pm

Willow held the Bostopian newspaper in her hands as best she could, though her hands shook and her voiced quivered. 'How have they got this?' Ruby looked across, whilst the engine of her faithful old Jerrick Scoutwork happily hummed away in front of them whilst the bright winter sun burst in through the open windows.'Gotten what, sorry?' Ruby asked again, not used to the silent treatment from her now wife. 'The old surname - Offinchley - I don't understand'. Ruby leaned back in her seat and held her right arm out of her window, wiggling her fingers in the relative warmth of what was called the 'eternal-spring' by tourists, though to Ochreites it was definitely winter.

'You had an "old" surname?' Willow nodded. 'Not me, personally, but the family's surname was Offinchley before they came here, from old Bostopia of course.' 'Old Bostopia? You mean not this one?' 'That's right. Not the "Bostopia has always been in Anaia" Bostopia, but the one we won our independence from...' Willow caught her words whilst looking at the crater-spotted landscape of Juniper Island '...well, the first time anyway.' 'And yet this one knows your name? Well, your old one. Your old family name, even' Ruby replied, catching her words herself. 'If anything it confirms a link between the Bostopia our parents and grandparents knew, and the one that's provoked or prodded almost every nation on this side of the region.' 'Willow we were just invaded' Ruby told her reassuringly, or as reassuringly as a situation like that could be. 'There's every chance they've stolen the information from somewhere.' Willow smiled back at her, though only a half smile. 'There's truth in that' she said. 'Now - changing the subject to take my mind off it - Graintjall's UXO disposal team will be here any minute, the plane landed at Monnstair not long ago. At least they'll believe this was a proper war and not some fairy tale.'

They drove away, but there was still doubt. 'Willow... the Bostopians say they didn't fire the first shot - we know they did, right?' 'We know they did, Ruby' Willow's voice tailed off. 'We know they did...'

by **Banija** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 2:30 pm

The Busukuma Post
Covering All of Banija, All of our News, All of the Time

An right-wing romp as the PPM surges to power based off of Banijan military failures in the Farf Civil War

A woman casts her ballot in Herzegovina City

BUSUKUMA, NATIONAL CAPITOL REGION- No matter the system of government, losing a war, no matter where it is fought or the reason, is a top motivator for a change in government. In a democracy, losing a foreign war is perhaps the least messy way of this happening, naturally. But from dictatorships, to monarchies, to democracies, and whatever else, it is never advised for somebody who wants to hold onto power to get into a war of choice- and then lose it.

But that is exactly what happened in Banija. After Xolile Lubabalo took a razor-thin majority to a makeshift, patch up coalition government to try and support Banija's allies in Farolera (and failing to do so), it was only a matter of time before her Government fell apart and the question went straight back to the people. Her Government fell apart immediately- but the election, of course, was delayed by the rapid and sudden collapse of the Atlantian Oceania entity, and the formation of Arrosia. A temporary, limited power, Grand Coalition was in place to help ensure bipartisanship in that time of rapid transition.

But the transition period ended, and back to 'normal' politics. We could really talk about the campaign, everybody's specific plans, etc.. But we all know it was decided in one moment- when well over 50,000 Banijan troops completely and entirely caplitulated to LIthico forces and their allies (including Quebecois paramilitaries and Yue regular forces) in Banija's worst military showing since the Equestrian-Banijan War of many years ago (WC80). Heads were always going to roll, and the question was not would Lubabalo be thrown out of power- but how by how much?

Party	Popular Vote	Popular Vote %	Vote Swing	Total Seats	Last Election Seats	PR Seats	[b]Constituencies	Seat%	Raw Seat Swing
Collective Resistance Union	24,966,493	32.07%	-4.15%	188	238	96	92	31.33%	-50
People's Protection Movement	29,732,569	38.19%	3.33%	256	220	119	137	42.67%	36
Banijan People's Congress	9,148,740	11.75%	-0.88%	59	61	35	24	9.83%	-2
Latter-Day Alliance	12,997,670	16.69%	1.72%	95	79	50	45	15.83%	16

And, as expected, there has been a 52 seat swing to the right-wing parties- a 36 seat swing towards the big center-right party, and a 16 seat swing towards their harder right, but junior coalition partner, Latter-Day Alliance. And, as expected, that is the right-wing coalition that will take a majority government- together, they will hold 351 seats out of 600 total in the Lukiiko, a very strong and commanding majority for this coalition government. And there are key figures to learn about as part of the right-wing coalition.

Who will be the next Katikkiro?

The next Katikkiro will be the newly minted party leader of the People's Protection Movement, Boaz Gor- most recently seen as the regional Premier of Kitara- the ever important, and quickly growing, swing region on Banija's west coast. He had been a member of the Lukiiko in a PPM safe seat for about 15 years, representing a very wealthy constituency in the exurbs of Busembe- only about 60 miles from the capitol, Busukuma. But after he felt as if he could no longer rise on a national level, he left national politics, and quickly turned to become the leader of the regional party.

Serving as the Premier of Kitara for 7 years, after the PPM's electoral tie in the last election, Asambe had intended to continue serving as the party leader. But there was a struggle within the party- and over time, the party's grandees had told him, in no uncertain terms, that he had not done a good enough job in opposing Lubabalo's 'foolish war in Farfadillis'. Boaz Gor then came into the picture, as there was a VONC called in Asambe- one that he won by only one vote. But you know how those go- even when you win them, you lose them. He resigned shortly after, and after a truncated leadership campaign, Boaz Gor became the national party leader.

Freshly elected at the top of the party list for a second stint in the Lukiiko, Boaz Gor has the top job. He told reporters that he was thankful for the opportunity, and that he would 'lead Banija in a new direction- one away from the socialists and secularists, that would bring us the prosperity promised to us by our God.' Certainly, there are many challenges that will face him, including the appointment of a cabinet, how to deal with the Banijan Esportivan Territories of Njaza, and, naturally, anything dealing with Arrosia.

The goal is simple. The last three Banijan Katikkiros saw their governments basically ended and ruined because of Farfadillis-related follies. Can he become the first in a very long time to avoid that fate?

Long-Form Election Results - This is the election under the tab labeled "Election 2"

Sports Headlines
- On Matchday 6 of World Cup Qualifying, Banija put a stop to its two game winning streak by earning a tight, 3-2 win over Vilwandia at home- the three points courtesy of a last gasp winner by Layvin Son-Saka. While it gets things back on track, there are worries around the Banijan back line, which one commentator said leaks 'worse than a 1600s drain pipe'.
- In fashion, Banija went to Ethane on Matchday 7 and could only muster a 3-3 draw. While the team is scoring goals in bunches, they can't seem to stop anyone- trademark toughness and discipline nowhere to be found with the Kadongo Kamu. Pam Scott has vowed to spend the halfway break 'searching for answers on the back line'.

Jumu Sanneh, former NT goalkeeper and the newly appointed Ambassador to Cardenao, arrives in Cardenao

Jumu Sanneh was rarely seen without a cigar in his hand. A backroom dealer, a saavy businessman and quite a sports agent, he was certainly an unconventional pick to become the next Ambassador to Cardenao. Unconventional if you were from a foreign nation, of course- appointing athletes to important political positions was all the rage at the moment in Banija. He was one of those people who were gifted, healthwise- never had any health issues despite smoking 'at least' one cigar a day.

His good friend, Toyuwa Okafor, had been his biggest advocate in getting appointed as the next Ambassador to Cardenao. This was one of Banija's most important diplomatic outposts- so this sort of job was only given with careful consideration. The previous Ambassador had done what many diplomats tend to do- leave diplomacy to go home and try to join the decision-makers, in their nation's capitol. Okafor had just been elected in suburban Istria to the Lukiiko, and obviously could not live out here anymore. Out with the old, in with the new.

It was certainly a unique outpost. He would have to learn on the fly, yes- but he had proven himself capable of that time and time again. A very hands on kind of person, as well as the potential to really throw his weight around in Anaia, where other crucially important Banijan Ambassadors called home. Sanneh, however, had never been to the country before his appointment. As he walked off the plane, he knew that it was quite a land. "Honestly, this might be the most beautiful country I have ever laid my eyes on." He said, to nobody in particular.

Sanneh, of coursre, had two wives- a practice that was widely accepted in Banijan Mormonism. Of course, simple numbers meant that it was uncommon, but it certainly happened. He held the hands of his wives- Kristina holding his right hand, while Medalia held his left hand. He let go of his wives hands, and put his pipe in his mouth. "Well, we're off to the Presidential Palace- straightway." An aide said to him. He had brought a gift for President Mihaly- some of Banija's finest premium cigars, and a $500 bottle of wine. Diplomatic protocol meant that you gave very fancy gifts to heads of state when you met them, and the Banijans were not cheaping out here.

Those were gifts that Sanneh had purchased himself. IN the back of the limo he now found himself riding in, there was a shield- a shield that one belonged to Zalaba II, the monarch who had conquered the Busoga Islands, almost 250 years ago. A historic item in Banija, granted as a gift to a key and crucial ally of Banija- as well as a symbol of the military alliance that had developed between the two nations. So when he arrived at the Presidential Palace, and his aides knocked at the front door, he was ready, with both of his wives, to greet Cardenao's great President.

by **Zwangzug** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 3:11 pm

Zwangzug's e-Lipogram

As a follow-up to our last publication, it is a thrill to inform you that Zwangzug's last two rounds of World Cup qualification had no goalscoring, at all, from anybody! As You Know, Bob, a draw without goals is a truly outstanding football match, good for scaring off morons who can't grasp this sport's sophistication and cunning. So to play two in a row is a particular joy, thus virtually assuring that no shallow, goal-happy numbskulls will corrupt our classy fandom.

First was Josifovo. Fans in Cham do not always know how to applaud shutouts, so our first half-hour was a bit awkward. But, gradually, visiting captain Milorad Kuzmanović won acclaim for his skillful tackling. In a bid to stir up his squad's attack, Josifovo's coach took off old forward Dukagjin Bajrami in favor of young Konstantin Filipović. This brought vitality, and Filipović had a shot that hit a far goalpost, bouncing down and back into play, but local sub John McDonald got it back in control.

Following this, a trip out to Brannfjord. Similarly to Josifovo, this is normally an attacking squad on its own, but up against a mighty stopping wall such as Zwangzug's squad, had to adapt to our tactics. Lukas from our capital had a far shot around a fifth of an hour into play, but Brannfjord's captain, Ivar Øygard, got his hands to it. Øygard is that rarity, a man who can both block and carry out spot kicks, what a cool thing to watch during shootouts! But this is, obviously, just a normal qualification group, and a draw will not go to an additional half-hour, to say nothing of PKs.

Anyway, Øygard had a grand showing. In contrast, Martin Nordstrøm was not so lucky. This physically imposing forward could probably crush fullback Ryland in a fight, but such an opportunity was not forthcoming, as Ryland (with aid from Nilkanth Milbang) was just lightly hopping around, not taking his bait or allowing his bulk to triumph. Cixin (from Chromatik club in days prior, now about to jump ship to SK Aasiaat Harbour) had a good try in half two, but a sprint from Tobias "Mr. Train" (sounds amazing!) won ball control back for our Viking hosts.

Halfway through qualification, Zwangzug is still on top of Group Four, having just a singular goal against (from Simian King Hitam in our third match). Brannfjord is a point back, with TJUN-ia chasing. Our back half starts in Namiri District, with TJUN-ia coming to visit Guariday.

Our captain, Julia, had this to say about Zwangzug's play so far: "If a conductor asks a soprano sax to play a C in its own notation, it will play a sound that for a piano or a violin is actually a B-flat! But if you ask this of an alto sax--oh, fuck, it's you guys."

by **Cassadaigua** » Wed Nov 22, 2023 3:13 pm

Something is terribly wrong. But what?
By Caitlyn Dufresne, Concord Heights Times

It has now been four games since the Fillies last won a game. A 1-0 loss to Saint Eleanor, given the predicament that the team had found themselves in was far from ideal, but at the beginning of qualifying, if I said that Cassadaigua would lose that game by that score, we would not have been surprised. Maybe we would have thought it would be more of a 3-2 than a 1-0, but a one goal loss to them on the road. Fine, they’re ranked ahead of us anyway. Then, came the stinger, the 1-1 draw to Barunia at home, thereby putting the pink and black at 0-2-2 in their last four. Overall, the team is 2-2-3, and arguably the World Cup dream is already over.

Sitting here, and trying to figure out what is wrong is tough. The goals don’t seem to be there, but on paper both Lexi McGregor and Shannon Cunningham seem to have a normal amount of goals one would expect. They aren’t massive totals, but they are reasonable totals. Then, Lauren Engle has chipped in a couple, and so has Kaitlin Millikan. Defensively, the team has allowed 10 goals, but only once has allowed more than two goals in a game. The goal differential is a +2 and there are no glaring problems. In a way, you simply have to say that Cassadaigua is running into opponents who about as good as we are anyway, or are simply elevating their game against us. That’s not enough, though. Here are some reasons that I believe are fair to mention.

1) Chen Huikang complacency. It was a love affair with him two years ago. He seemed to do everything right both in tournaments that led up to the World Cup 94 qualifiers, and then that competition itself. Chen worked hard to get the team to get where they were, so you have wonder if that same effort was made for this year’s team. Does he have it within himself to make the needed adjustments for this squad, because even if the team is already out of the World Cup in reality, we still want to play as well as possible all the way to the end. I’m not seeing those adjustments being made, case in point, reason #2.

2) Carly Patterson isn’t getting it done. Up front, while Lexi McGregor and Shannon Cunningham are playing well, Carly Patterson is not. She earned her starting spot after two massive years with Grande Mountain, but that has not translated into these games. Carly has not been goalless, but seems to MIA more often than not. Yet, both Chloe Anderson and Rachel Bolden are kept on the sideline. This is where the adjustment comes in. Why is Carly still starting when both Chloe and Rachel have plenty of World Cup experience?

3) Chrissy Engle isn’t getting it done. While Lauren has played decently, her twin sister has not made the most of her first starting assignment. This is lead many to believe that having her as a commonly used sub in the last cycle was a valuable weapon for this team and something that has not been replaced. She switched roles with Krystal Sherwin, but the two of them have very different playing styles. Rachel Wyman has been given a fair amount of playing time as first option sub, but we have not seen great results from her, either. Lauren isn’t off the hook here, either, while her play has been acceptable by any reasonable standard, the team didn’t merely want that from her.

Who’s not to blame, or much less to blame:

I think the back end has been quite strong. Captain Madison Rutland, along with Tiffany Brown, Alyssa Marlin, and Rachel Becker have done a great job. 75% of our twelve goals were scored in two games, and it’s not there responsibility to add to that total. Well, Tiffany can be, but right now that is not a player they are looking to for goals above others. In goal, Stacey Schalberg had one bad game which was unfortunately a big one against Baggieland.

Where do we go from here?

Chen Huikang can’t keep putting the same lineup out there, otherwise he might be short-lived as a Cassadagan manager. I hate the thought of that, and we know that CASE tends to be a very patient organization, but 2-2-3 is 2-2-3. It is easier to accept that if the manager seems to trying to make adjustments but that is not happened. Perhaps, it will start to happen with the next game because we all know that it needs to happen.

Lexi McGregor is going to have to play insane from this point out. We know she can have streaks where she looks like the best player in the world. Up to this point, she’s been good, even very good. But she needs to now look like the second coming of Alan Belmore, or whatever his name was.

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