World Cup 90--RP Thread

[Mertagne]

"Oh, wow, it's Claudio Vantula!" called and pointed the high-pitched, slightly cracking voice of the young teenage boy in the slightly dingy Stanton's Micro that Claudio Vantula had indeed been spotted in. The 27 year old Mertagnian striker stood tall over the boy with his large, chiselled and impending nose, yet felt awfully small - he hadn't shaved in five days, and was wearing a taupe coloured hoodie that depicted the logo for the XV Olympiad, alongside a turquoise beanie hat that had done that thing where the air gets trapped and makes your head look like a smurf's. He hadn't necessary prepared for interaction with the public.

Claudio put back the sandwich he'd just pulled out of the meal deal section and turned to face the teen. "That's right, nice to meet you! What's your name?"

"My mum told me not to tell my name to strangers. You can call me..." the boy scanned the packets of crisps at eye level on the shelf opposite him. "Smokey Bacon."

Claudio laughed. "How's 'Smokey' for short? Your mother sounds like a smart person, you'll do well by listening to her. Can I help you with anything at all? Do you want a picture?" he smiled an uneasy smile - hopefully the boy didn't have too many social media friends.

Claudio thought back to a conversation he'd had with Luka Hazaluta a few weeks prior. His vice-captain, three years his elder yet as humble as anyone, had showed off a new trick to deal with the baying public. The man - Hazaluta, that is - had learned a few years ago that he couldn't really stand being in front of cameras. Some therapy had helped out with that, and was still ongoing - but as part of his latest development into the space of 'what can you do to avoid media attention', he had got printed and signed over one hundred very professional looking business cards, one of which he had handed to Claudio. They simply said, in a rather unassuming font:

This card is to confirm that
you have indeed met
LUKA HAZALUTA
football player at Chatswood
and the Mertagnian Football team.

That was it. 'you have indeed met' made Claudio chuckle. He snapped back into the Stanton's, and watched as the boy fumbled for his camera phone in the large pocket on the front of his hoodie. The screen cracked, Claudio briefly saw a background of the boy draped in an electric guitar far too big for him, throwing up some complicated hand signs. They were probably some new form of swearing, which was par for the course for Mertagnian kids nowadays. Growing up with access to a whole bunch of stuff from beyond Anaia and not just seeing it on the internet meant that the cultural exchange between Mertagne and the multiverse was bigger than ever, on the bright side and the seedy side. Claudio was a victim of this as well, of course - his XV Olympiad hoodie said that more than anything else could.

Vantula squatted down on a knee so that he could be in shot of the teenager's stubby outstretched arm. A couple of clicks later, one with a standard smile, and the other with a combined showing of hands so that the digits spelled out "CV", and the kid put his phone away and stood there awkwardly.

"So, are you a fan of Itzi? Or just Mertagne?" asked Claudio, in an attempt to bring the interaction slowly towards a close.

"Oh, I like Century Mertagne. But it's great when you smash a few goals in in the CAFA or the World Cup. What's been going on recently?"

"Heh." Claudio pinched his nose. "Century's a bit far for you, no? It's not exactly a few stops on the train from here in Neorudo. As for scoring lots of goals, I'll score them when Grahm Stagg sends them my way. How's that?"

"Grahm Stagg is a beast! There's no way it's his fault you're not scoring goals. I reckon it's Pia Aziz that's losing the ball all the time. My dad doesn't like her very much." the teen pulled his ear.

"I've not met your dad, but I have met Pia Aziz, and she's very good with the ball. They like her in Astograth very much, you should watch some of her games over there sometimes." replied Vantula.

"How? My parents aren't going to buy plane tickets to Astograth, are they?" said the teen, quizzically.

"Claudio lightly gestured towards the teenager's hoodie pocket. "You've got a phone, haven't you? See if it's on there."

The child looked like he'd just discovered fire. "I can find foreign football on my phone?"

"If you know where to look, sure. The internet is a big place, you can find anything you want." Claudio said, before catching himself. "er, with your parents permission, of course. Internet safety and all that."

"Cool." the kid kicked his feet slightly as the conversation hushed and the typically jaunty muzak of the shop came back into focus.

Claudio was rapidly running out of small talk to make with this kid. He had older siblings and a nephew, but the nephew was just a baby, and couldn't do anything complicated like throw gang signs, be a faraway fan for a football club they've likely only watched on television, or call out celebrities by name in chain convenience stores.

Suddenly, a person came around the corner, pointed at the boy, and looked flustered. "There you are! How is it possible to lose you in a Stanton's Micro? It's not like we've gone to big Stanton's this week!"

The boy's eyes widened for the second time in as many minutes, however this time it was out of a sense of fear. "But Mum! Look! It's Claudio Vantula!"

Claudio dragged a hand across the air in a half-wave. "He's not told me his name, he's been quite good."

"How does he know your name?" the boy's mother asked, with a slight frown.

"Oh my god, Mum, how do you not know who Claudio Vantula is? He's literally on the opening credits to every football game? And he's so good in the video game for World Cup 89, I have him on my silver only team and he always gets one over on Euan Young, and..."

"I'm a football player, madam. It seems your son is a fan?"

"Oh, right. Well, I'm sorry if he bothered you." she said, slightly flustered. "Come on now Tyler, we've got to go and get a chicken for tea."

"Catch you later, Smokey." winked Claudio to the teenager.

Tyler put up a hand in a wave and smiled. "Erm, bye!" He sped off down the aisle with his mother in tow.

Claudio turned and reached for the sandwich he wanted, to find that someone had pilfered it.

Hazaluta's business cards were a good idea, but there was something a bit more rough and raw about a good old fashioned on-the-street encounter. It didn't make him want the sandwich any less, though.

[Pasarga]

Let us start off with the positives, which is that the Wanderers are currently undefeated and sit at the top of the table. Winning the group and getting automatic qualification to the Finals that are being held in Atlantian Oceania was always the primary goal, as avoiding the playoffs was something that the entire team as well as the PFAand the fans of the Wanderers desired. While the team had managed to successfully navigate their way through an intense and slightly unlucky playoff draw a few cycles before against Recuecn, there was absolutely no desire to attempt to try their luck for a second time. Especially with the team being ranked in the top ten in the sport, although it would be tolerated if it came to that and it was how the Wanderers would be able to advance.

There is also the trip to Poamersia, where the Wanderers were able to completely let loose and vented out some growing frustration that had began to develop. Putting five goals past Poamersia en route to a blowout victory,, against a Poamersia side that was top of the table at the time, seemed like a needed tonic at the end of the first half of the qualifiers. It re-established the Wanderers control at the top of the group and sent a message that at any moment that this team could explode for loads of goals. It seemed the sort of game that would send the team on their way to a steady second half of the campaign and hopefully an easy qualification. That was wishful thinking.

That brings us to the bad, which is too many draws, especially at the Stade de Torgos where the Wanderers are supposed to be at their strongest. The team has drawn half of their matches, the only reason that the group is still contested and that the Wanderers have not ran away from the rest of their competition in this group. An undefeated campaign though it may be, it is far frommimpressive or result driven when half of those results are draws and allowing teams with losses to be tied with you on points at the top of the table, with difficult games still left on the schedule.

The worst example was the latest home game where the Wanderers were held to a draw in Torgos byAtlantic Republic. This is a team that to open up group ay that the Wanderers completely and utterly outclassed, playing them off the field in their own backyard. Yet in the reverse fixture the Wanderers were unable to play with that same focus and intensity that had made them look so formidable through their opening four or five games. The team really needs to get their heads screwed back in straight and start performing like they didn in thosenfivenfour games and not how they have carried themselves in the last five. Qualification is too high a stake to not give it your best.

[Polkopia]

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This is the main screen you'll see when you log in. As you can see, we have already started one of the lessons, but this is a general overview of what you can expect once you select your language. You'll earn gems, which can be exchanged for neat ways to enhance your language-learning experience, and progress your streak to show off to all your friends! Stay tuned for more lessons on navigating the new features of Bi.Lingo!

[Nyowani Kitara]

President Nafuna Akongo, having another teleconference meeting with KPWC leadership at home on a mid-day break at Day 5 of the Conference

President Akongo was preparing to, yet again, update the Central Military Commission on the peace talks ongoing in Nyowani Kitara. There had been updates, of course, since the last time she had updated them. And the updates, she knew, were not about to go over well with the power brokers in the Kitara Progressive Worker's Coalition. But she knew that it was her duty, even as head of both party and state, to do so. She was entrenched, yes, within her position as the head of the state. But it was not about to be a pretty meeting.

She wasn't exactly ecstatic about the terms being imposed. Her advisors would probably have a similar, if not, even harsher reaction. Multi-national peacekeeping force? A peacekeeping force that the Kitara Revolutionary Forces themselves, would not be a part of? That was not going to play over well. Yue, in particular, boots on the ground in the country? That might spark an uprising. But she had to make them understand the state of affairs, and how the group needed to stop looking towards the past- but instead, look towards the future.

Not to mention, the news of a potentially permanent Euran military base on Kitaran soil. She didn't know how well that would play out. Probably not well at all. But what could be done, right? This time, everybody would be present at the meeting, including Nephara's permanent invitee, Ava Sanderson, the replacement of Monica Lindbeck. She wasn't quite at Lindbeck's level, and yet- did an excellent job of representing Nephara's interests at this table.

Of course, both the President and Ava Sanderson were present in Varakoula. Everybody else was joining the conference call from somewhere in Dewayo. Once everybody was logged in, of course, the President started the meeting. "My friends, colleagues." She said. "I am happy to report to you, that according to my talks with Rutherford, and what I have observed here in Varakoula, that these peace talks are likely to be a success." She paused, as the men and women who were in the conference call clapped. "All parties are agonizingly close to finishing a peace agreement, one that would result in the official end of the civil war, a true peace treaty instead of just a cease-fire. An end to the fighting. The terms that I presented to you all the other day, still stand. The KFF will surrender and de-commission. Malik Akongo will not return to the country, living out his days in Yuezhou, sponsored by both the host government and the Banijans. The DFLK will have their referendum. If they lose? They will De-commission. If they win? Well... Our countrymen will turn into our neighbors."

KPWC Central Military Commission

Chairwoman and President of the Republic- Nafuna Akongo
Permanent Invitee- Ava Sanderson(NPH)
Naval Representative- Adm. Oscar Karlsson
Air Force Representative- General Hazael Ooko
Army Representative- General Jehoram Oyange
Legislature Representative- Susanna Opondo
Invitee- Colonel Sey
Invitee- Achille Riruimcseny(FFD)- Mercenary

She paused, looking at everybody's reactions. Everybody had already known that, of course. Nothing that she was presently saying was any sort of new information. They weren't exactly happy with it, of course. Letting Malik Akongo, a losing warlord, off to live the rest of his life as a rich party boy in a neighboring country? Not exactly ideal. The DFLK getting a referendum on independence for the lands that they control? It was something that caused quite a few of them pain. But they knew what the President had explained to them- that, unfortunately, Nyowani Kitara increasingly seemed to be a sideline observer at a conference regarding its own future. But that was just the near-term. In the long-term, Nyowani Kitara's future could be secured. They would just have to win an election- something that none of the people in this room had tried to do.

"There are two major updates to these peace talks." She began. "First, I want to begin with an update regarding the actual peace agreement. As I told you all before, there were serious disagreements at the negotiating about who would monitor the election, how the election would be monitored, and the logistics of all that. It doesn't really matter to me how the election is going to be run up. In no uncertain terms, Nephara has emphasized that they will conduct a free and fair elections."

That was when Ava Sanderson interjected. "The President, of course, is correct." She paused, and then continued. "No matter what final form the agreement comes up with, my country will take the lead on administering elections in this country- both for the independence referendum, and then, after that, the national Parliamentary elections. Then, we will review what happens from that point forward. But as we can emphatically say- there will be free and fair elections. While Malik Akongo obviously will have no involvement in elections, we can guarantee that the elections in Nyowani Kitara will be both free and fair. There will not be any sort of election rigging, or bias even towards the incumbent government, when rules are set down for campaign and election administration."

Nafuna Akongo nodded towards Sanderson, and continued. "But, there are two updates regarding the management of peace within the country. Carl Rutherford has informed me, that the nations at the talks are close to agreeing to a multi-national peacekeeping force, that would keep the peace during both the referendum campaign, and after that, during Parliamentary elections."

As soon as she said that, there was an uproar.

"Peacekeeping force?? We don't need more foreign troops on Kitaran soil." Admiral Oscar Karlsson said. The President couldn't make out exactly what General Oyange was trying to say, but General Ooko was making himself clear.

"Why do we need a multi-national peacekeeping force in the country?" General Ooko said. "The ceasefire for these talks right now, is holding rather well. We're not going to go on a killing spree of KFF soldiers- we have immunity for pretty much all of them, signed on the sheet and written down." The President held her hand up, to get the generals to quiet down so she could continue.

"Neighboring countries want more of a say in how peace runs, since they are, well, our neighbors." The President paused. "They are going to last at least through the elections. The force will consist of-" She looked down at her notes, and then started reading. "Eura, Nephara, Tikariot, Græntfjall, and the United Republics of Yuezhou." They looked just about ready to mutiny at the mention of the last nation. "We are unclear currently on how long such a peacekeeping force would last. Probably through elections?"

"Græntfjall troops?? On Kitaran soil??" Admiral Karlsson was nearly ready to explode once again. "How can we trust Græntfjall troops?? How many assassinations have they pulled off in the past? They don't like us- they don't like you! Gustav Isaksson sits, rotting away in a Græntfjaller jail cell, for life. Hell, They tried to assassinate you. What makes you think that they won't do so again? If Græntfjaller troops are walking the streets of Dewayo-"

"The White Winter Queendom's soldiers won't be anywhere near Dewayo." The President replied. "Look. I understand. It's obviously not ideal to have Græntfjall troops on Kitaran soil. But it's not as if we are inviting them in. They are part of a multi-national peacekeeping force. A 5 nation peacekeeping force. One that will be led, mostly, by Nephara and Eura." Ava Sanderson gave her a look, but the President just continued. "Their troops will likely be in DFLK territory- it is highly unlikely they will come down here. And if they come all the way down here- they will be here with troops from five separate nations. We will be fine."

"I don't trust Græntfjall as far as I could throw them." Karlsson said. "Would you invite a lion into your bedroom? They tried to kill you once- I'm sure they'd love to finish the job. If they have an intelligence agent among those soldiers, and they can get close to you-"

"Look, we will make sure they cannot get close. Nephara and Eura are not abandoning this mission. Not at the crucial juncture." The President said this, slightly exasperated. "There is no way, as part of a peace-keeping mission, that Græntfjall will be allowed to try and assassinate me. If they do, they will suffer extremely serious diplomatic consequences." The Admiral looked displeased and unconvinced. "Think of it like this. They are trying to prove themselves worthy of international involvement. If they use this opportunity to assassinate a foreign head of state, on a peacekeeping mission? They will be set back diplomatically, quite possibly for a long time. The world will be watching. That alone is my security. I will endeavor to get a strict timeline to get their troops out of country."

The Admiral simply nodded. He wasn't pleased with it, but he then took the moment to tell her that he would support whatever she did at the conference. "But you missed the key thing here." General Oyange said. "These are Yue troops in our nation's borders. Not socialist troops- but United Republics. The men who will are probably going to be butcherers of Ren Qiang, this sub-region's leading light. Your Father, if he knew that United Republics troops were coming with your blessing, would be rolling in his grave."

Nafuna Akongo's face also darkened. "Unfortunately, it is the price that we must pay for progress." She told them all. "We are not, by any means, abandoning our support of Ren Qiang. As the United Republics continues their, unfortunately, likely successful push into Xilindao, we need to figure out a way to secure our own future. And unfortunately-" She gulped before continuing- "United Republics troops will be part of that future."

"UR troops on Kitaran soil!" Susanna Opondo said. "Græntfjall troops are one thing. But United Republics troops, are too far. As someone who has their ear on the ground within our legislature, people are not going to be happy that the United Republics will be allowed to deploy troops onto Kitaran soil. The bond between the Akongo family, and Ren Qiang, cannot be undone like that. Your Father moved to protect Ren Qiang in his darkest moments, when the capitalist counter-revolution struck his country. Then, Ren Qiang returned the favor in kind, doing all he could to help save your father from cancer, and then try to protect you, and secure your reign for the future. UR troops in Nyowani Kitara would spit in the face."

"It would be one thing if we had lost the war, to allow UR troops on Kitaran soil." General Ooko then said. "But we are the victors in this war! We have won! Why do we have to accept all these terms like we are the ones surrendering. Like we are being conquered. The only part of this treaty that should be happening is the part with the KFF. United Republics troops on Kitaran soil! An abomination. If a UR soldier was burning in a fire, I would not pi-"

"We get it, General." The President said. She was growing frustrated. "You all don't understand. These are the terms that have been laid out to us. These are the terms that our Rushmori partners are going to accept. They are steep, yes, even in victory. But the Banijans are cut out entirely. That damned Kabaka had been cut down to size. My brother is sent running for the hills. Ren Qiang-" and her voice broke. A single tear rolled down her cheek. She really liked Ren Qiang, she was emotional about this moment. "Ren Qiang will understand." Her voice broke. "I will make it clear to the Eurans and the Nepharans that UR involvement, in particular, must be kept to an absolute minimum. But you all understand- that we cannot make this our red line over not having a peace agreement."

She was still emotional, slightly, thinking about Ren Qiang. But she went on. "You all understand what will happen to Ren Qiang, correct?" They all nodded. "Good. Now, you must all understand what will happen with Eura." Ava Sanderson raised an eyebrow, as the President continued. "We are going to grant Eura port access, and give them permission to build a permanent airbase on Kitaran soil." Everybody simply looked at her, quite surprised at the development. "Are we really in a position to say no? Unlikely. The way I see it, if anything goes precariously wrong..." And everybody understood what she meant. Although the Eurans almost certainly would not do what she was implying, aka, rescue her if they were in dire straits close to an election, they could help provide stability.

Ultimately, the reason Nafuna Akongo said yes was that this could protect her, personally. It didn't take a genius to understand the Central Military Commission was not happy with her. And Nyowani Kitara most clearly was not immune to the coup. She was still young, at 22, even having been in power for so many years now. She wouldn't put it past members of her Central Military Commission, if they thought things would truly go to hell, to try and replace her. A multi-national peacekeeping force? Probably wouldn't do anything about it. But a Euran, or a Nepharan, force in the country? At least, in the short-term, it would shore up her own security. She estimated she probably had a year or so before elections? Protect herself for that time, as she eventually would try and chase a democratic mandate. She knew that, for her at least, campaign mode would start the moment she landed in Dewayo after this conference, and it would be hard to campaign if she ended up like Zelotes Akongo's son- at the bottom of Lake Viljan.

But they all agreed to it, nonetheless. She went off to inform the Eurans and Nepharans of what she had discussed, regarding the overall treaty, with the Central Military Commission. Peacekeeping force? Fine. Græntfjall forces? Confined to the north, if possible. UR troops, as few as possible, and certainly none in solo units.

---

Afternoon on Day 7 of the Conference

The Conference, was, of course, an ongoing one. It was a long-lasting civil war that had three different sides, who all wanted different things. It was going to be complicated, and never going to take just a day. But they were on Day 7, and they were tantilizingly close.

While Rushmore's heavy-hitters dealt with the important issues of election administration, the President had spent a lot of the down time in Day 6 speaking with a man who she utterly despised, and barely respected, Mayor Max Ulf. Have got to do things that you don't want, right? Their discussions, of course, all regarded the technical matters of the referendum.

Many of the actual rules of the election could not be known until the election administration was figured out. Then, whatever nations were involved in the Administration would get together to set the rules. But there were two things that needed to be figured out. One, timeline. And two- geography of the referendum? What did they need for an independence vote? Could various parts vote on independence?

The President wanted to negotiate as much of this herself, simply to prove to everybody at the table, both her friends and her foes, that she was fully in charge. That she was capable of negotiating various items on her own. And issues like this- who would, realistically, go after her? Better off, she got a good concession. There would be no voting on the mainland- the mainland would remain unified no matter what, even though the DFLK currently controlled a portion of it. A potential for less of a threat on NYK's land borders. However, NYK's two peninsulas, would both be part of the voting territory- even though she controlled the southern half of the western peninsula. She wanted that for continuity purposes. And Ulf? Well, wanted to try and pick a quality electorate.

So when everybody gathered, she asked the Tikariot chief negotiator to be allowed to speak. When he said yes, she rose. "My friends, colleagues." She said. "I'd like to thank all of you for what we have done here, so far. We are bringing peace to my country, and, through tough, hard-nosed work, forging a path forward for all Kitarans. We have Kitarans who are scared, because of the extended violence, the rebellions, and plenty who have been forced out of their homes due to the KFF and the DFLK." Max Ulf looked up at this, with anger on his face from the slight, but she continued as if she hadn't seen him. "As many nations negotiate Nyowani Kitara's future, particularly in regards to peace-keeping and election administration, I have announced that I have reached an agreement with Max Ulf on a few key provisions, regarding the upcoming northern referendum."

Max Ulf then stood. "I would like to thank the KPWC Chairwoman, Nafuna Akongo, for her cooperation." His refusal to refer to her as her head of state title, and instead as her title as head of her party, infuriated her. But she kept her cool and looked at him, eyes ablaze. "While technical rules will only be established once election administration is built out, we have reached on an agreement for some overarching rules that much be had for any referendum to be legitimate, and for it to get a true desire of the will of the people."

And at that moment, they both passed out copies of what they had agreed to.

NYK-DFLK Agreement on Referendum Rules

#1 All NYK citizens living in the mapped out area(defined below) can vote on the referendum

#2 The mapped out area below shall vote as one unit. If votes in favor of independence are 50%+1 in the whole territory, then the whole territory shall be granted independence. If the votes are less than 50% for independence, then the entirety of the territory shall remain part of Nyowani Kitara.

#3 Any foreign NYK refugees whose most recent residence is in the area defined below, shall be eligible to vote in the referendum, with the agreement of their present host country

#4 To allow for focus on the referendum, the referendum shall begin and conclude at least 6 months before Parliamentary elections for the whole of Nyowani Kitara.

#5 The election administration, if they should decide to allow foreign donations to a campaign, should make each and every foreign donation publicly accountable to the people as soon as it is made.

#6 The Nyowani Kitara Government, the KPWC, and the DFLK shall promise to recognize any referendum result. If independence is granted, NYK will recognize it and shall be committed to respect any new government's sovereignty.

#7 If independence is granted to the below defined territory, Malik Akongo's ban from Nyowani Kitara shall extend to this new nation.

Pink is where the independence referendum will take place

[Alasdair I Frosticus]

To: Nathan Hanifer, Sarzonia National Team Coach

From: Shadow Whitmore, Holy Empire Captain


Dear Mr Hanifer,

I am writing to you, captain to coach, to protest in the strongest possible terms your dastardly underhand tactics during Sarzonia's shock 2-1 victory over the Holy Empire at the Imperial Hippodrome the other night.

I have personally checked World Cup Committee bylaws, as well as the World Cup Committee Constitution, and can find nothing that explicitly bans your tactical approach; but I want you to know sir, gentleman to gentleman - if gentleman you indeed be, which I now regrettably find myself questioning - that your tactics were low, sir; low indeed. Unbefitting a gentleman.

Let me make this perfectly clear: you may talk of 'moving needles' and 'laser free kicks' and 'sending the Stars into celebration' in your public statements, but you and I both know that your triumph last night rests on base deceit. Let me make this perfectly clear... it is certainly not alright to come to MUCK's temporary headquarters at the Imperial Hippodrome, knowing full well the premium we place on sentient humanoids untouched by lust, and then claim to us immediately before the match that your entire team consists of virgins.

Let me submit to you that you knew precisely what you were doing with this extraordinary falsehood. You knew full well following our trip to Sarzonia that we were seeking closer contact with virginal Sarzonians in order to... to... ummm... to make friends and influence people. Why, a certain misguided 'Hannibal Ochre' of the Sarzonian 'Federated Undermining Cucks Kondemning Religion' even issued a statement saying 'hands off our virgins'. Which, let's face it, is proof enough that our campaign to... well... ask your virgins to make a personal sacrifice for the greater evil good.

So for you to drop by our locker room last night to 'say hello', and then mention in passing that 'incidentally, did I mention that none of my squad have ever had sex' was clearly a base attempt to get my lads far too excited for their own good. And what's more, it worked. In our excitement at... ummm... possibly getting the Stars to join in a post-match, err... ritual (nudge, nudge, wink wink), the squad became distracted, and failed to play their best football. I submit to you, sir, that you knew full well that this would be the result of your caddish tactics.

What's more, you did this knowing full well that only two members of your squad were untouched by human lust. I shan't name names on the latter point, nor dwell on the delightful and ever so entertaining perversions that several members of your squad have engaged in, except to note that Mundies have no secrets in the Holy Empire, and that they would make worthy cultists themselves should they ever wish to leave aside their mundane existences and join in the worship of the Great Old Ones. I mean, who would ever have thought that Jake Campos liked to [redacted redacted redacted], or that Tommy Benignati liked to [redacted redacted redacted] with his grandmother's [redacted]. Not to mention Jaxon Hennepin's habit of [redacted redacted redacted]. Filthy perverts all.

And while we would normally celebrate their vile habits and filthy perversions in a spirit of cultly admiration, to claim that these [redacted redacted redacted] were virgins was a base lie and a shocking untruth that took advantage of our good faith. Or our good bad faith. Or... well, you know what I mean.

You, sir, should be ashamed of yourself.

And I hope that when the Great Old Ones come, they choose you - yes you - as the first target of their uncaring wroth.

Yours in disgust,

Shadow Whitmore

President of MUCK
Captain, Holy Empire World Cup 90 squad

[Trolleborg]

Greetings, compatriots!
Due to the state of things as they are, right now we will continue our mini-series, trying to boost the morale of the team and the fans with the memories of the unexpected but very pleasant victories of our national football team.

Episode six is on the way. In WCQ-87, our players brilliantly play at the entire first round, winning every single game. To the surprise of almost everyone, the Holy Empire team, one of the mammoths of world football and the future world champion, was among the defeated. Moreover, THE was defeated at their own legendary stadium, while leading in the score. But, true, this result can also be considered as the result of a bold experiment with the lineup of the team: the entire Holy Empire squad consisted of the same person, just from different time periods of his biography. In the second round of the tournament, our team began to suffer completely inexplicable defeats, and Holy Empire quickly recovered from the shock, made up for the lost time, bounced back in the return match 5-3, and eventually came to a draw to find out who went to the championship. These events, as you remember, are immortalized in the film "The Lot".

Episodes seven and eight can also to be combined together as they happened during the same tournament, WCQ-88. Yes, precise the one where our team suffered a series of insulting and incomprehensible defeats, for which the public blamed the organizers. Indeed, losing to teams that are obviously inferior in class and have not shown any speciality in football skills itself looks very strange and explanations of this kind unavoidable arise. But let's not forget about the two victories in the first round of that tournament, which our players won despite the fact that experts confidently predicted defeats for them. In the first round, the team had to fight Tequilo, at that time a contender for the highest places in international tournaments, on his own turf. To the surprise of the experts, our lads probably heated the bookmaker's for decent amounts of money, winning 1:0. Shortly after that, our lads had to play an away match with the group's favorite, its first seed Zwangzug, and they, in spite of everything, again caused great damage to the bookmakers coffers, who bet en masse on the defeat of our team. Let's not forget that in the first round out of nine matches, our lads won only four, but two of defeated were the favorites. In the second round, when crazy results ceased to appear with such consistency, the Trolleborg team scored another victories over both Tequilo and Zwangzug, took second place, and, as we all remember, were eliminated in the playoffs.

The ninth episode of our story took place at the Melayu Cup. As everyone remembers, our team has been participating in this tournament since the fourth edition and in the first three attempts Trolls has never been able to pass the group stage, despite the fact that opponents were often clearly lower class, some of them were amateurs, and very weak ones. Finally, in the eighth tournament, the cursed barrier fell. In the group stage, everything was decided in the last round - after two draws, our team had to win the last game, against the defending champions Southern Palm Islands, and managed to do it, with a score of 2-0, paying off for the defeat in the last tournament. In the quarter-finals, Acastanha was defeated, but not without losses – it’s enough to point, that in the first three games, our team did not concede a single goal, but in this match they took the ball out of the goal twice. In the semi-final Trolls was to face the Pemecutan team, the clear favorite to win the tournament and the rising star of world football in general. To everyone's surprise, our players won 1-0 and proceed to the final, being crowned as MC champions.

Let's hope that in WCQ-90 our players will be able to please us with unexpected success.

[Krytenia]

Geoff Ricksen sat at his desk in the High Consulate. Well, he says it's his desk; technically he only sits there on Mondays and Wednesdays thanks to the High Consulate's hot-desk policy; this is what happens when your diplomatic mission is a converted flat above a takeaway. Still, there were some fringe benefits; the large tandoori wrap (with chips) and bottle of GXi he was currently in the middle of demolishing, for example. It was a quiet lunch hour, save for the beeping of the reversing bin lorry outside.

Geoff got up to look out of the window. This had been a triumph for the Krytenians over the bureaucrats at the BCC; some bigwig politicos back in Emberton had managed to step in and manage to get somebody from Waste Management to actually empty the bins, rather than the convoluted system they'd had before that involved a private contractor, diplomatic licence plates, and an international hazardous materials transport licence to move their rubbish and waste cooking oil the five hundred yards or so to the Embassy's bin sheds.

As he looked down, he was surprised to see a second - and clearly newer - bin lorry parked some short distance from the first. The two crew emerged from the lorry, and appeared to be questioning the driver of the older lorry. Geoff opened the window a crack surreptitiously to hear what was going on.

"BOLLOCKS!" came a cry from the far end of the yard. Geoff sighed and picked up the phone to dial the Embassy.

"Suzanne? Yeah, the Council's at it again. Starting a fight with itself this time by the looks of things."

[Ko-oren]

The Eternal Table - Part 2

For this version, we've gone back in time, much further back than the '10 years of the Top League'. This is where we dip into the rich [citation needed] history of Ko-orenite club football, of short-lived formats, even shorter-lived clubs, clubs that were renamed and survived through the ages, clubs that were left behind in the past - and how even those clubs still play a part of relevance today. It's safe to say that while Ko-oren looks like a country that stands still in its traditions, there's a lot more that changes under the hood. We might not be able to avoid doing a bit of historical storytelling, of how Ko-oren's culture and politics changed with the years. No worries, I'm doing everything I can to avoid going down that rabbithole.

Looking at the table (below), we've added 17 seasons to the mix in all - that's seven more than the previous 'Eternal Table'. And in those seven seasons*, a lot has happened. It might seem like recent history, but it's really not. In that time, Ko-oren has gone through quite a bit of governmental restructuring - as is recorded in the constitution of our beautiful social meritocracy, our institutions and laws must be revised every few years - and the KFA wasn't excluded from that. If we want to know why the club names looked so different... Oh no, there's that rabbithole.

Rabbithole #1
Ko-orenite history is very much a series of events clearly linked together in a chain that takes us from now to centuries ago. One way to track what part of history we're talking about, though, is through naming conventions. At times, the chain of events swung a bit more towards nationalism, when all the names were Certified Gehrennan instead of using the (currently) normal (and somewhat foreign) names like Aminey and Greencaster - known, in the before times, as Amahne and Garihnkatar respectively. The same goes for given names: nowadays, it's very common to see multiversal English and French (and other) names like Ernest and Jacques, but there were times where all names were recorded strictly in local tongues - of which Gehrennan is the first and foremost. So, when we look at this table and we see names like "Tangku" and "Branvun" (or, even older, "Branvün", "Tangkü", as well as "Maethorü"), these are now better known as Tanques and Branvon, in the Frenchified and Finisterrified versions of the original Gehrennan name.
Rabbithole #1 over

Hopefully the table is now a little easier to read. Maethoru SC is at the top, still, comfortably, but now it turns out they haven't played as many games as two other clubs, Schemerdrecht SVV and Miradela GD. That's because there were several seasons where Maethoru SC wasn't invited to play in the national league, mostly for petty political reasons where 'any league involving Maethoru must certainly be controlled by the national government in some way' as politicians, certainly in Aminey and other francophone bits like Cote Austral, liked to claim. "Can we claim this league is fair if one club - from the capital no less! - is run so differently from the rest?"

And so, Maethoru was excluded. In the format before that, Maethoru was there, but now Schemerdrecht SVV and Miradela GD were missing. As we add seasons to the Eternal Table, that effect will get stronger and Maethoru's stranglehold over other clubs will only increase. The 'format before that' is one that we've used a long, long, long, long time. And yet, the top 10 is unchanged because we've only added two of the 'old format' seasons. It's not until the 15th spot where we see the first strange names appear. Kthosl. Now, that's very obviously an 'old' Gehrennan name, referring to a province of the country, back in a format where teams mostly represented a large-ish city or a province/region - two teams from the same location were simply impossible. Kthosl roughly coincides with modern day Mayara province: that's the hinterland of the capitals. Jeknolr is another such name, representing a large diamond-shaped area east of modern-day Intermare that doesn't quite line up with the modern day provinces of Sudaefjoll and Nordoren. Liju also used to be a historical footballing powerhouse, in northern Intermare.

And then we see something weird. Cresthill FC - that's a modern name, but 1) you've probably never heard of them and 2) if you have, you've probably noticed they never appeared in the top division. Cresthill FC is the modern name of a club that once was called Willowbourne Athletic (or Willowbourne United), which has had a brief stint at the top level and grabbed a title in the confusion of rapidly switching formats. Further down, it's more Gehrennan names of places that have much nicer sounding names now. Mika FC, Suinohiro XI, Furune FC, and Aberworth Eleven are all from the short intermediate seasons. Castelo e Calvente CS is a modern club with a single top-division season. Leeshire United is the modern name of the short-lived Aubury United (also from the few in-between seasons)

*  Team                   GP   W   D   L  GF  GA  GD PTS
 1 Maethoru SC           391 184  94 113 522 383 139 646
 2 Schemerdrecht SVV     395 158 105 132 405 354  51 579
 3 Miradela GD           395 155 100 140 583 545  38 565
 4 Advance Alara         391 151 103 137 632 568  64 556
 5 Branvon CD            391 151  84 156 404 432 -28 537
 6 Straudum VV           353 143  95 115 257 225  32 524
 7 Aminey CS             381 137 110 134 461 438  23 521
 8 Katashi-Kanatsu       391 136 109 146 523 525  -2 517
 9 Bruncester United AFC 353 128  99 126 291 282   9 483
10 Tanques AOE           295 116  72 107 371 346  25 420
11 Maynard AFC           289  91  68 130 290 385 -95 341
12 Cirelbourne United    257  73  76 108 219 295 -76 295
13 Couziers-Olympiques   128  40  30  58 180 202 -22 150
14 WSR AFC                96  36  26  34 121 126  -5 134
15 Kthosl                 38  24   7   7  67  34  33 79
16 Jeknolr                38  23   8   7  54  30  24 77
17 Liju                   38  19  11   8  58  38  20 68
18 Cresthill FC           42  17  14  11  44  31  13 65
19 Kol                    38  16  11  11  45  41   4 59
20 Ajongka                38  16  10  12  46  36  10 58
21 Teragaseki             42  16  10  16  42  45  -3 58
22 Tkhon                  38  13  11  14  35  48 -13 50
23 Mazaj                  38  13   9  16  35  36  -1 48
24 Norilya                38  12   9  17  37  45  -8 45
25 Mika FC                28  12   5  11  33  30   3 41
26 Othushun               38  10  11  17  43  54 -11 41
27 Leeshire United        28  12   5  11  34  46 -12 41
28 Engbrothun             38  11   8  19  38  58 -20 41
29 Jofa                   38  11   7  20  28  50 -22 40
30 Arelothun              38  10   6  22  30  47 -17 36
31 Insin                  38   9   7  22  36  56 -20 34
32 Castelo e Calvente CS  32  10   3  19  48  63 -15 33
33 Sydberg                28   7   9  12  26  34  -8 30
34 Saiwu                  38   8   4  26  24  68 -44 28
35 Iliju                  38   7   5  26  22  66 -44 26
36 Suinohiro XI           14   5   1   8  15  24  -9 16
37 Furune FC              14   3   6   5   7   9  -2 15
38 Aminey SC              14   3   5   6   6   8  -2 14
39 Aberworth Eleven       14   2   3   9  11  20  -9 9

*OOC: it's seven seasons, but a very unknown period of time ICly

[Saint Eleanor]

PROTIP: Do not ask for fish and chips the next time you go to New Bayside Fish and Chips in Silverton. It is currently being refurbished by a new owner who intends to reopen it as a kebab shop... and won't accidentally name it after the next district across.

[Eshialand]

Disaster
Yuezhou 0-1 Eshialand
Eshialand 2-6 Zwangzug

"And Axelrod-Conway slips it past the Eshian defense, getting it to Helsen-Roan..."
"That Andrew Travers really is incompetent, isn't he? I mean, when was the last time we played him, 2021?"
"And yep, Helsen-Roan scores..."
"What is that, 5-2?"
"6-2 Karsten, 6-2. Zwangzug is officially the first team in history to put six past the Owls."
"Y'know, Tefei'o Tesuna'e being scratched last-minute has me wondering... was that decision made to tiptoe around Sarah Silver's mortal fear of anything Anaia-related?"
"Can you stop it with the politics? I'm sure that has nothing to do with it..."

"RAGGGHH!!! Shut up you f***heads!!!" a young man yells as he rips the car radio out of his '86 Rettsbach Gazelle, throwing it into the back seat with the force of a baseball pitcher who's just been cheated on. For him, nothing could spell disaster quite like this day, one which started with a simple decision to go for a drive in the country, and ended with him in the middle of nowhere with a dwindling gas level, vanishing sanity, and 25 miles down Highway 32 from the nearest Jim Morton's on half-price apple fritter day. What could possibly make this day worse?

Ker-THUNK! Ga-TUNK!

"No no no no, not like this, not like this!!" he said as smoke started emanating from the hood of the car, not knowing what was wrong with the car but knowing that, whatever it was, it sure wasn't any good.

"Awww, am I gonna have to call EAA? Really? How could this day get any--"

Just then, the car radio sputtered back to life, as if possessed by some sort of other-worldly magic. "And with that, it's official: this is the most humiliating defeat the Owls have had at home since the fabled Massacre on Highchurch Street..."

"What in the name of h*ll... the radio works when I don't want it to but the car doesn't work when I need it to?" he said while opening up his phone to call 322.

"Hello, this is EAA? Can I have your name and card number?"
"Name's William Waravon, card number's 0000-0000-1093."
"Oh, uh, huh, ha ha," the operator said, clearly flustered by the name she just heard over the phone. "C-could you repeat that?"
"Sure thing! William Waravon, card number 0000-0000-1093."
"K-K-King William?! Wh... why do you need our assistance??"
"Why does anyone call EAA? I need a tow, of course!"
"Uh... oh, okay... Where are you exactly?" she asked, still not fully comprehending why the bloody king of all people would need to call EAA.
"Uh... I think I'm about half a mile north of Wesleyton Road on Highway 32? Not too sure though..."
"That's gonna be a bit of a problem then, I doubt we'll be able to get anyone over there for about an hour..."
"An hour???"
"It's been a bit of a weird day for traffic accidents, sir, so I can't just give you a tow truck. Other people need them!"
"Okay then, I'll wait..."

There he was, the King of Eshialand, standing in some corn field, what felt like worlds away from civilization, helpless to stop the sun from setting in the red evening sky or to speed up the tow trucks whose workload was heavier than that of a business intern at a Riches 250 company, the perfect culmination to an absolutely terrible day.

Ring!! Ring!!

William checks the phone, and it's his old friend Kenny Morgan. What did he want? A pick-me-up after the match? That was one thing he simply couldn't help with...

"Hello?"
"Hey Will! So, uh... did you hear about--"
"Yes."
"And what they're saying about it?"
"I have a pretty good idea."

...

"Is your day going any better than mine, perchance?"
"Heck no Kenny, heck no."
"Really? This is the worst day I've had in at least a year and a half..."
"You know what then? You may just win."

Just then, clouds begin to roll over the 32, and rain begins to fall; not a sprinkle, but a rainstorm.

"No, no, mine's probably worse after all."

Yuezhou - 0
Eshialand - 1 (Carey 26')

Eshialand - 2 (Carroll 51'; Harran 76')
Zwangzug - 6 (Haugen 13'; Waugh 19', 30' (pen.); Ginoud-Sachs 45+3'; Axelrod-Conway 55'; Helsen-Roan 85')

[Vdara]

“I’ve been trapped in a salami for cheating on my wife. I swore this day would never come. Cannae believe I’m a salami.”

[Barunia]

World Cup 87 wasn’t quite a disaster for Barunia, but it was close. The Suns came out of the competition with an 8-1-9 record. For Neville Swan, it was another blow to his confidence as captain. It wasn’t just him either. Emmanuel Carter, the “next big thing” according to all reports, was sullen, and the rest of the team were angry. Angry with each other, angry with the coach, angry with themselves. It was Neville who had to keep the peace. That was hard work, and it was made harder by the fact that he was angry himself. He remembered coach Barrios telling him one day, “You are too deep, too forward.”

He remembered thinking “Wasnlt that the point of an offensive midfielder?” Barrios’ style was behind the ball, hold the back line, pass out from there. That wasn’t the way any of the Suns were used to playing. Plying their trade in the domestic X-League, they were used to typical Barunian football: win the ball, and you immediately switch to attacking mode. Run forward, look for the gaps, pass. Lose the ball, and switch back to defensive mode. Barunian football was fluid, dynamic football: at any time, their listed 4-4-2 formation could be a 3-4-3 or a 5-3-2 The midfielders were key: Barunia always lined up with an attacking and defensive midfielder. Their roles were too overlap, to control the ball through the middle of the pitch and support the forwards and defenders. Barrios had told them to play zone. “Stop moving!” he would roar from the sidelines, as Stefani Obando would charge forward, or Neville legged it back to the defensive line. The team were beginning to get frustrated at being stopped from doing what instinct and years if training had taught them to do. On the other hand, barrios was getting frustrated that they were constantly disobeying his instructions. The mood in the dressing room was sour.

It was with this cloud hanging over them that the Barunians entered Cup of Harmony 79. An exit here in the group stage would have been really disheartening. It was just three games though, and the Barunians got off to win with a 3-4 win over Darmen. It was an important morale boost, especially as Darmen had been in the Suns’ group stage of the qualifiers, and soundly beaten them.

A loss to Abanhfleft, followed by a win over Wreckeria saw the Barunians top their group, a much-needed result that salvaged what had been a disappointing cycle. Going out in the next game did put a damper on things, but the mood had lifted a little. The feeling in the team was that they could do better, and if giving the chance, would do.

Thinking back, Neville wondered if that Cup of Harmony success had been a bad thing. Sure, it had helped the team’s morale, but it also bought Barrios an extra cycle. There had been talk of the NFB potentially tearing up his contract as early as the third game of the world cup campaign, but the Cup of Harmony result perhaps lifted the axe from his neck. The result was that Barrios was still at the helm as the team went into World Cup 88.

[Sendhang]

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DAY 8 - MONTH 10 - YEAR 8

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Agung or Agus?

Persatuan Sepakbola Seluruh Sendhang (PS3) is reported to have set its sights on Pemecutan as the search for the new head coach of the national team continues. Agung Suryanantha and Agus Putra Yudana are among two names shortlisted as the potential head coach of the Rice Farmer. The two candidates from Pemecutan are said to be among the most suitable candidate to take on the job.

Why do PS3 shortlisted candidates from Pemecutan? What advantages do they see from these two candidates?

Agung Suryanantha is the former head coach of the Pemecutan national team who brought the Melayu Archipelago giant to their first-ever World Cup. According to records, he is also the former head coach of Pesjem Jematang. In addition, Agung Suryanantha has also worked as the assistant manager of the Pemecutan national team and Pesjem Jematang before getting the promotion to be the head coach of both entities.

Meanwhile, Agus Putra Yudana is the winner of multiple Pemecutan league titles and 4 CMFA Champions League trophies with his current club, Pesetih Titih, helping Pesetih Titih to become the biggest club in Melayu Archipelago. He was also the former head coach of PSBY Busung Yeh and Pesgem Gemeh.

How far can these two candidates take the national team?

This is the most frequently asked question among local football fans right now especially after finding out the news that Pemecutan fans once urged Agung Suryanantha to resign due to poor performance in the 9th Melayu Archipelago Cup. He was sacked after the tournament in Berdeng Bundok even though he brought Pemecutan to the Round of 16 of the 89th World Cup just a few months before that.

Looking at Agus Putra Yudana's potential, his ability to lead the Pesetih Titih to multiple Pemecutan league and CMFA Champions League title caught the eye of local football fans. Local football fans had also noted that the current Pesetih Titih head coach has a reputation to polish young players and instilling discipline among his players.

So between these two candidates, most of the local football fans chose Agus Putra Yudana. However, the decision is still in the hands of the PS3 leadership.

[Turori]

Comeback Kids: Turori in back-to-back 4-goal second half victories

Iobabao Legendary Park, Mliona, Turori :: After having played just two of their first six matches of World Cup 90 Qualifying at home, the Turori National Team had found themselves in the midst of an extended three match home run that would take them to the three largest stadiums in the Island Emirate. While the first game of the three game homestand ended in a lopsided defeat to Drawkland at the Kionao Minor Field, the Eels made the short trip to the Iobabao Legendary Park in Mliona for an important match against regional rivals Qasden. The Eels got the better of the Qads on the road to kick off the Qualifying campaign and were hoping for a similar performance to help them to rebound after their struggles just before the halfway break against Drawkland.

The Eels put forward a strong team with the only true inexperience coming from H'munao Cagomia on the right side of the defense - the only of the Eels starters with fewer than ten career National Team appearances. It would take a while for Turori's ship to get sailing in the match, however, and they would find themselves trailing 0-1 at the half with doubters beginning to speculate whether this Turori National Team had reached their peak and if the slide was inevitable.

The Eels would make one change at the half with Loala Inkabu coming on in place of the young Cagomia as Turori switched to a slightly more aggressive formation in search of a way back into the match. It wasn't until the 68th minute when unheralded youngster Lumlao Noauryua was introduced adding a bit of a wildcard into the match with high energy and unpredictability that the home side finally managed to find their footing. Noauryua's quick feet earned the Eels a free kick in the 69th minute that would turn the momentum around as Daliora Toru'u energized the crowd with the set-piece equalizer. Less than five minutes later the Eels had taken the lead through Nua'oma Aikiki lifting the spirits of the entire nation who could see their World Cup Qualification hopes rising back from the ashes they had been buried in over the previous 120 minutes of play. The Eels would not give the Qads an inch from there with Kentu Umaka'a converting an 86th minute penalty kick and Loala Inkabu adding an incredible 4th goal for Turori in stoppage time to seal off the game, with Turori completing the four-goal comeback in the second half to secure three points and keep their position as joint top of the Group 3 Table with Drawkland.

Cednia Beach Center, Cednia, Turori :: After their match with the Qads the Eels would head to the Cednia Beach Center in Cednia for their most critical home game of the campaign against second seed nation Geektopia. The game that everyone had circled on their calendar at the start of the Qualifiers was perhaps no longer seen as most important following the defeat ot Drawkland on Matchday 7 but it was still a crucial match in the home of Turori's biggest domestic club.

After seeing the combination of Timaala Hualtia and Cocoabo #86 take the loss against Drawkland, the Turori National Team took no chances in starting Derizi Amatopa for the second consecutive game. In what would evolve into a very similar match, Turori once again found themselves trailing in the first half with Germaine Sophie having scored for the visitors. Once again, Turori would make a single half time substitution - this time it was Daliora Toru'u coming on to replace Kinabo Telioa - but to limited effect. The Eels did luck into an equalizer ten minutes into the second half on a corner kick when the ball bounced off the back of Biliki Rona'atu'i in the midst of a tussle and somehow found its way into the net. It wasn't until the Eels second substitution, however, the introduction of Lutara Makakio in the 64th minute that Turori really came alive. Though they would never get on the scoresheet, Makakio had a fine game setting up a pair of goals from Kala'a Yuliizala that would propel the Eels into a 3-1 lead. Cuoabaza Orani'aoa would add Turori's second of the night from the corner flag with less than five minutes to play in the match and sending the fans at the Cednia Beach Center into cheers as the Eels dismissed what many saw as their most difficult opposition on pitch.

Despite the back-to-back victories, however, the Tuorri National Team remained second in the Group 3 table behind Drawkland who held the tiebreaker by virtue of their 3-0 victory on Matchday 7. Turori had lost control of their own destiny knowing that even victories in each of their remaining five matches might not be enough to take down the kick corps but it would have to be one match at a time for Tarek Edgeli and the Turori National Team to if they are to reach the locally hosted World Cup 90 Finals.

 Turori [4] - [1] Qasden
				
	GOALS:	Turori 	:: 69' Daliora Toru'u:: 73' Nua'oma Aikiki:: 86' Kentu Umaka'a:: 91' Loala Inkabu           		
	STATS:	Turori 	:: Possession: 57%:: Shots: 9:: Corners: 9	Qasden 	:: Possession: 43%:: Shots: 4:: Corners: 2
	Lineup:	[GK] Derizi Amatopa, [D.] Amakli Inuro'o, [D.] Moumouni Verre'elali, [D.] Biliki Rona'atu'i, [D.]  H’munao Cagomia, [ML]  Kiidallen Aeroluzzi, [MC] Naraiza Ruaplal, [MC]  Kentu Umaka'a, [MR]  Daliora Toru'u, [FC] Nua'oma Aikiki, [FC] Turakia Diijelhma			
	Bench:	[FC] Loala Inkabu, [FC] Kala'a Yuliizala, [M] Kinabo Telioa, [M] Tulaki Rauogba, [U ] Lumlao Noauryua, [D] Karek Edgeli, [GK] Timaala Hualtia

 Turori [4] - [1] Geektopia
				
	GOALS:	Turori 	:: 55' Biliki Rona'atu'i:: 68' Kala'a Yuliizala:: 83' Kala'a Yuliizala:: 86' Cuoabaza Orani’aoa           		
	STATS:	Turori 	:: Possession: 56%:: Shots: 11:: Corners: 7	Geektopia 	:: Possession: 44%:: Shots: 4:: Corners: 6
	Lineup:	[GK] Derizi Amatopa, [D.] Amakli Inuro'o, [D.] Moumouni Verre'elali, [D.] Karek Edgeli, [D.]  Biliki Rona'atu'i, [ML]  Cuoabaza Orani’aoa, [MC] Kentu Umaka'a, [MC]  Kinabo Telioa, [MR]  Kiidallen Aeroluzzi, [FC] Nua'oma Aikiki, [FC] Kala'a Yuliizala			
	Bench:	[FC] Turakia Diijelhma, [FC] Lutara Makakio, [M] Daliora Toru'u, [M] Tulaki Rauogba, [U ] Bvalis Amaanara, [D] Cusaram Sakeri, [GK] Timaala Hualtia

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TURORI NATIONAL ✓

@TuroriNat

#Eels second straight come-from-behind 4-1 victory, take down Geektopia in Cednia Beach Follow the Story Here...

#WC90Q - #TURvGEK - #CBCenter

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[Hapilopper]

Team Hapilopper Headquarters, Hapilopper City
Leading up to World Cup 90 Qualifying Match 10: Hapilopper v. Abanhfleft
It was late at night, and most everyone from Team Hapilopper had left for the evening. Everyone, that is, except for Nathan Ellis, who was burning the midnight oil in his office, trying to look through video of Hapilopper’s last match against Abanhfleft, a match where the team lost in large part due to Jerold Dickman’s idiotic penalty giving the Fleftics a golden opportunity to take the lead. That match frustrated Nathan just to watch. There was no way that Team Hapilopper was going to qualify for a World Cup if they kept pulling stupid moves like that.

And as he sat there in the darkness of his office, all by himself, he wondered if maybe he was to blame for it. After all, Jerold openly spoke of idolizing Nathan when he was growing up – for his take-no-prisoners, ruthless style of play. Nathan hit “pause” on the video player, got up from his sofa and walked over to the window behind his desk.

When it was daylight out, Nathan could look out and see Team Hapilopper’s practice field, the centerpiece of one of the nicest facilities in all of Atlantian Oceania. Tonight, he could look out and see the lights from downtown Hapilopper City still shining brightly against the night sky. All he could think of on this evening was if he had led his team down the wrong road. If maybe he was to blame for all of Hapilopper’s ills. If maybe, instead of encouraging his teammates to play as viciously and as dirty as he had, maybe he had told them to use his story as a cautionary tale.

He tried to envision, just for one second, an evening in Capital Stadium, where the mood was more joyous, where it seemed like the Haps were on the verge of something big, something magical. Something like a World Cup qualification. He closed his eyes as he thought about it.

Nathan Ellis could barely hear himself think. The roar from the crowd was drowning out any sounds that he would normally hear on the pitch – the shouts from head coach Thom Perkins, the trash talk on the pitch, and even the sound of footsteps roaring up and down the artificial turf at Capital Stadium. He looked up at the clock on the large screen at the stadium – 89:20. He looked at the score – Hapilopper 4, Rhubarbton 0. Just a little bit more, and this place would turn into a madhouse.

He figured there’d be some extra time. A few times, the referees had gotten onto the Hapiloppian faithful for running onto the pitch – too soon, they’d argue. Even Nathan had to get in on the act, telling the fans to behave – “NOT YET! NOT YET!” he’d shout. All he and his teammates had to do was park the bus, and they were doing that just fine. As the clock continued to tick away as merciless as ever, he saw the announcement – Second place in the group had just lost. A win for Team Hapilopper – now five minutes away with extra time – would mean they would make the World Cup proper!

Those five minutes seemed to take forever, but when the referee blew that final whistle, Capital Stadium turned into an absolute madhouse as fans rushed the pitch as joyously as ever. Team Hapilopper had done it. They had really done it! They were in the World Cup proper! And Nathan, realizing the situation, started making his way to the tunnel as quickly as possible, but was mobbed by fans wanting to hug him for finally making Hapilopper proud.

And then he opened his eyes. Such a dream seemed unrealistic. He looked out to the skyline and wondered how it went so wrong. The Hapilopper National Football Team won its first 15 matches, an incredible feat by any measure. They came so close to qualifying for World Cup 83, and even closer to qualifying for World Cup 84. But then it went wrong during World Cup 85, and the less he thought about that, the better.

Nathan was, by far, the oldest player on Team Hapilopper. He had seriously considered turning in his notice with Southfell United, the Nepharim squad he played for, to pay his full attention to the national team squad. At 34, he was reaching old age, and at times longed for the days from that Baptism of Fire, when he and his teammates were a wide-eyed, excited bunch of players from the Hapilopper Football Association, excited to finally get to play the world. Some of them hated each other, sure, but they got over that hatred pretty damned quickly. He wished he could feel that youthful exuberance again. He longed for a clean slate, but he knew he wasn’t going to get it.

He sat down in his chair and slumped down, thinking long and hard about what could have been. He looked at that picture of him holding the Baptism of Fire trophy, the magazine covers, and then over towards another picture, one that made him smile.

It had been taken at Center Street a couple of weeks ago. Nathan had been enjoying a few beers with members of the current generation of players – Toby Bryson, Peter Robson, Maverick King, James Huddleston, Lewis Pryor, Kerry Spalding and Fabian Treloar. All of them had huge smiles on their faces. All of them still had that youthful exuberance that he envied. All of them still had a lot of time to go.

He stared at that picture for a long time. He could see some of his old teammates in it. Ernie Stevenson, he was now a father of twins and living off his vast winnings. Cooter Harris was spending his days at his new fishing camp near Border City. Pancakes Taggart had opened a chain of pancake houses in Hapilopper City. Murray Hunnisett was wrapping up a successful career in Banija. Kelvin Beverly was now a high school coach. Pretty much all of them were either finding a new life outside of football, or had done so.

All that was left was Nathan. He wondered how long he’d still be out here. He told people he’d keep playing until Team Hapilopper finally qualified for a World Cup proper. He just wondered when that would be – if that would ever be.

[New Lusitania and the Algarves]

STL | Serviços de Transmissão Lusitana | EN|Desporto/Sport

World Cup 90 Qualifying
THE END OF GRILO’S REIGN
National team coach sacked after poor string of results

The Monday afternoon directly after the international break, an extra-ordinary meeting at the FLF was held with the intent of deciding the future of Francisco Grilo. The following day, upon much deliberation, it was official – Grilo had been sacked from the National Team Coach position. It had been in the media for a while now, but the three defeats to Le Choix (0-4), Pemecutan (4-6) and Equestria (2-1), separated only by a win to the Cordian Isles (2-0) had really driven the federation into action. At the time of his exit, the Selecção are currently in sixth position with what is a losing record, if you’d call it that. Despite this negative outcome, they remain the second-best attack in the group, with the lack of proper defending hindering their qualifying attempt with the joint worst record of 22 goals conceded. The gap to second is already eight points and their current record not only sees World Cup hopes leaving port, but also jeopardises the Cup of Harmony ship heavily.

So… what does this mean for the rest of the qualifying path? Well, the Selecção need to find someone to pitch in and indeed they have. Henrique Valentim is currently the interim coach for the next few games, as the FLF attempt to find something more permanent. Valentim was previously working in the coordination of the National Youth Teams’ System and so has a decent eye for talent to promote to the A-side. The federation will still look for a possible long-term solution, though they have pointed out that if Valentim manages to turn things around, there isn’t any reason for him to continue for longer.

The idea is to change the tactics to a 3-2-4-2, or rather a 3-5-2, as many teams have adopted over recent years, with more wing support and a tighter defence. New Lusitania have never had this as their main tactic and will definitely come with a learning curve bang in the middle of a cycle. Midfield will be closer to the centre of the park as a result as well, with forwards likely staying the same. The next match is Nimishzz, at the bottom of the group and so should provide a good starting point to break into this new mold and get comfortable with it, especially as Siovanija and Teusland, with similar struggles, up next at home. All the teams ahead are yet to have been played in the second round of matches, bar Pemecutan, who, after a rough start, seem to be coming back into the trend they were forming through the past few cycles and seem to be halfway into the next finals. Le Choix however, are only two points behind, but that massive gap to the Selecção needs to start shrinking if there is any chance of pulling back a miracle in the final seven matches to come…

[Tikariot]

As Daniel Longobardo walked down one of the many hallways of the Vaiomala Beach Resort just outside of Varakoula, he could hear the exasperated voice of his trusted advisor Yorick Marmenlind echo from one of the side rooms that had been reserved for breakout sessions.

"Why do these things have to have all these buttons? Half of them don't even do anything!"

He couldn't help but smile. Yorick could read a room like few others for the slightest changes in behaviour or expression, could see through political plots and immediately come up with sharp observations and counterpoints, but give him any new technology and he was more out of his element than a blue whale in the Taerian desert. He hurried along to make sure that in his attempt to establish a video call connection with Port Rhovanyon Yorick would not accidentally manage to format the internet. Just as he entered the room, Yorick held the console in both hands above his head and looked ready to throw it through the open window out into the gardens of the resort when he turned and saw the foreign minister with clear relief on his face.

"Here, you take care of this, this thing, because I'm ready to send this into orbit!"

Daniel had to fight hard to keep a straight face as he took the console out of Marmenlind's hands and place it back onto the conference room table. He put a hand onto Yorick's shoulder. "Go, take a short walk, grab a drink, take a breather, whatever you feel like right now, I will get this set up, ok?"

"I feel like taking a battle-axe and commit computicide."

That was too much for Longobardo and he burst out laughing, much of the pent up tension of the negotiations breaking like a dam. As he looked back at Yorick, he was on the receiving end of the most indignant look he had received in a long time. "Yorick, I'll take care of it, ok? Sorry for laughing, I'm not laughing at you, it's the whole situation. All the talks and back and forth, all the negotiations and the tensions, it just doesn't take much to break through."

The older man stroked his beard thoughtfully. "Yes, yes, I understand. I shall leave you to it then and enjoy some of the fresh air that we have not breathed of much in the last week. Allow the scent of the sea relieve some of the frustrations."

Longobardo watched Marmenlind walk off. That had sounded far more like the advisor that had been so indispensable in dissecting all the plotting and different currents that had been going back and forth during the past seven days. He also made a mental note to try and find out how old the wily old veteran actually was, just out of personal curiosity, because he still could not stop picturing him in long flowing robes as a wizard from a time long lost, before looking back at the screen. After trying to make sense of the dozens of windows and notifications that were taking up the large screen on the wall, he sighed and just unplugged the console.

---

20 minutes later both Daniel Longobardo and Yorick Marmenlind were sitting in front of the console with Prime Minister Roderick Armitage as well as General Armon Kandinski sharing the large screen on the wall.

"So I hear that there is progress?" Armitage sounded pleased at the prospect of the talks coming to a quicker end than feared.

"Yes, Prime Minister. There still are many details to be gone through, but I believe that all parties have made quite significant giving and taking to be pretty close to put together a framework that feels acceptable and workable."

Armitage nodded. "International media have been quite, let's call it, surprised by the directness and range of Tikariot's counter proposal."

Longobardo smiled. "I can imagine. Needless to say, most of it was blocked by Eura and Nephara, but that was to be expected and I would honestly have been extremely surprised, if they would have made more concessions than they actually did, Sir."

The prime minister sighed. "Yes, they are not easy to negotiate with, they have a lot of experience with conflicts like this one. Give me a quick rundown of where we stand, please."

"Well, in terms of holding elections, Nephara is going to have the reins on them and I knew they would not let any of them go, so no big deal there. I know that they'll do a great job with them and it's in their own interest that nothing goes sideways, because otherwise they'd be the first ones to get smacked on an international level."

"And history has shown that especially with as many moving parts as a post-war Nyowani Kitara has, it is far better for one entity to have oversight over everything instead of having to communicate across nation lines to ensure everybody and everything is on the same page. Nobody can afford to leave any loopholes that could reignite any fuses that might still be smouldering." Marmenlind added.

Armitage nodded thoughtfully. "That makes perfect sense. But you look too lighthearted for that to have been all?"

Longobardo smiled again. "Of course that was not all. We will be part of the elections observer panel, so we will have full insight into the whole apparatus to ensure there are no infringements. I'm not worried about the Nepharim trying to rig anything, but more that none of the Kitaran parties would try any funny stuff. The biggest thing, though, is the peacekeeping force. I know that it technically was no big concession for Eura or Nephara, but it will be multi-national, split between Nephara, Eura, Tikariot, Græntfjall, and the United Republics of Yuezhou."

"I would assume split up by territories?"

"Yes, I would assume so as well and it would make sense. Tikariotian soldiers would be stationed in the west and in part of the headlands in the areas around our borders, Græntfjall also in the north etc. Easiest in logistical terms and our troops are mobile enough that in the hopefully unlikely case of any violence flaring up they could be deployed to move anywhere within the country to assist quickly and efficiently with potential backup replacing them from within Tikariot just to make sure not to unbalance things."

Marmenlind piped in. "We would not want us having to move troops to back up, say, Eura, and then some opportunists would try to attack our weakened positions. Obviously any backups entering Nyowani Kitara would have to exit again upon restoration of peace, should the need have arisen to move to begin with, just so nobody could accuse us from trying to gain any additional leverage. But let us all hope that for the sake of all of us things will remain calm, so we will not have to start doing inventory of how many soldiers we have where."

The prime minister allowed himself a carefully satisfied smile. "This indeed sounds like some nice progress and in the end an acceptable position for Tikariot."

Yorick nodded. "Yes, Prime Minister, I would agree with that assessment, Nafuna is technically the winner of the war, as much as one could call anybody an actual winner in a conflict such as this, and with Nephara and Eura having borne the brunt of the operational side during the war within the country, they obviously will hold the biggest sway in the coming process as well. I would presume that the Nepharim will not be the biggest fans of Tikariot for a while--"

Armitage chuckled. "No, I've seen some polls they conducted and we might not get as many Christmas cards from Nephara for a while, but I think we can live with that."

"--but they were instrumental in putting an end to the bloodshed and to help facilitate a ceasefire agreement, so I believe that in the end this will be something that almost all sides will get something positive out of that."

"Has anybody mentioned the situation of refugees yet?"

"No, prime minister."

"OK. If the matter comes up, I would like you to stress that Tikariot is remaining fully committed to any humanitatian aid both on Tikariotian and Kitaran soil as we have been before during the conflict to help the general populace of the nation that has suffered as a consequence of the action of the few. No matter what the political situation and games are at, this has and will not change."

"I shall relay that in case it becomes part of any discussions. Sorry to hurry things along right now, though, we are expected back in the main room in a few minutes."

"Oh, don't let me hold you up, thank you for the briefing, Daniel, it is very good to hear that significant progress is made and let me know, if there is anything you would require from me or anybody else in Port Rhovanyon. Good luck."

"Thank you, Prime Minister. General."

As he hung up, Longobardo realized that General Kandinski did not say a single word during the whole briefing. He turned towards Marmenlind. "Did we--"

Yorick nodded as if reading his mind. "Yes, the General was relegated to a rather taciturn role in this chapter of the story."

Despite his face remaining as stoic as ever, he could not hide a smile around his steel blue eyes. "But let us return to the battlegrounds where the shield of peace shall be forged on the anvil of diplomacy."

[Oberour Ar Moro]

Dragoons Continue Great Run of Form
By Liçzenn Gestiau

After their fourth win on the bounce, the Oberour Ar Moro National Team find themselves third in Group 17, though nine points away from second place and a playoff position.

Next for the Oberours is Brenecia, the group's second place team. For even the slimmest of chances at a playoff spot, a victory against the still undefeated Brenecians is absolutely necessary.

This four-game run has finally seen the new talents of the national team start to emerge. Ronan Vrely has resumed his partnership on the left-side of the pitch with Iudicael Breut. Foreign based players Seguinus Tesserant de Linge and Ivon Bone-Vive are emerging as real possibilities for a final roster. And Sweepers Tei de Court-Val and Peire de Baingneus aren't waiting to make their presence known.

---

Peire and Anna had waited until 0 A.M. to face an Oberour Ar Moro official that was refusing to release military records to veterans when they discovered they weren't alone.

A woman in a form-fitting military uniform, somewhat like an Obeorur Ar Moro uniform, but to the nth degree. Aiguillettes, medallions and ribbons and medals, epaulettes, white gloves, a sword, a sash, it was practically a parody of itself. And something about her pose and bearing gave Piere an uncanny feeling.

"What the hell are you doing here, Pucelle?" Anna, in Cygnet guise, spat in disgust. The pseudo-officer, Pucelle, nearly spat back.

"The same thing you are. I didn't know I had to ask for your permission," the other woman responded. Peire definitely recognized that voice, though he was still trying to parse it. Pucelle looked down at Piere. "I see you have a new ward."

"You mean Spaceboy?" Anna responded, using her embarrassing nickname for him. He'd spent a lot of time trying to come up with something better, but Anna seemed to prefer that to any other suggestion. "He is quite handy in a pinch. And he knows how to work well with others."

The woman in the burlesque military outfit huffed. "Look, you're here for Laurens Cul-Pesant, as am I. If you can manage to keep from killing yourselves, I'll gladly let you take part in the hunt. But if you're not, you can go home and I can handle this by myself." She threw her blonde hair back, and suddenly Piere put two-and-two together.

Anna grumbled, but acquiesced. As the three prepared to enter the coalmine and snap Cul-Pesant's connection to the Castle, Peire sidled over.

"Pucelle, is it?"

Pucelle was clearly quicker on the uptake than he was. She responded in surprise. "Oh! Hello, Spaceboy."

---

"Hello, Spaceboy." A woman with blonde hair in a white shirt, black jacket and skirt, and pantyhose dismissively welcomed Peire to their reserved table at a quiet restaurant. Some of Peire's national teammates wanted to go out and celebrate their good run of form, but Peire had to beg them off. He was meeting with a woman for drinks. If they wanted to think it was a date, all the better. But this was a business meeting, rather unfortunately.

Peire felt stung. "It's good to see you again Eloise."

Eloise de Saint-Seine was 24 and was a staffer with the Ministry of Foreign Affairs. She was a graduate of Cyrenense University, she had played the viola up through college, had an apartment in the Minerve district with two roommates, liked science fiction movies, and her perfume smelled subtly of cinnamon. Piere and Éloise had dated for six months last year. The ending of their relationship had not gone well.

"It's certainly a surprise." Eloise face was bland, cold, and composed. Her eyes, on the other hand, threatened to slice right through him. She picked up her drink, casually swirled it. "How long have you been going out with your new friend?"

What was the insinuation here? "Anna and I have been working together for two months," Piere answered in what he hoped was the correct amount of crypticness.

"I see." Eloise took a sip of her drink and put it down. "I've been working for eight months," she said, following his double-meaning. "Anna's was working long before me. Sometimes with a partner, sometimes not."

Peire felt a slight pang of betrayal which clearly registered on his face. "You'll have to ask her about that someday," Eloise jabbed him. Peire wondered how he constantly ended up around these stiletto-like women. He had to treat this as another game. He's a sweeper, go on the attack.

"I'm surprised you've taken this extra work. It doesn't seem to jibe well with your day job." Piere looked intensely at Eloise's face, but it was a sheet of ice with no cracks.

Eloise shrugged. "I'd say it does."

Piere made an uncommittal noise. Eloise read his face, as always, and pushed ahead.

"A woman can't become a member of Oberour Ar Moro. Not a Chancellor, not a Minister, not a General, not even a clerk. But I can work for Foriegn Affairs. I can be sharper, better read, better prepared, than any sagouin in a gray jacket with gold buttons. And if the Minister wants the correct answer, he can go to a man with the right bloodlines and wrong IQ, or he can come to me. That's what I plan to do."

She was unsatisfied. Again. Piere pushed on. "And... after midnight?"

"Some of those imbeciles somehow make a pact with the devil and hurt people. And I can solve the problem there as well."

Eloise looked flustered. She had gone a little too far. She picked up her glass and took a deeper drink, gathering herself. Swallowing, she put her glass back down and went on the attack.

"Piere. Just know this: Anna...she's going to want more out of you than you can offer her. And that will come sooner than you think."

"What do you mean 'more'?" Piere asked. "She's not a groupie or whatever."

Eloise responded like she was explaining something to a child. "You're a sweeper for Regium Immortal, and the national football team. You're a somebody in Oberour Ar Moro. That woman is not going to be satisfied with fighting one monster a night every week or so with you as a sidekick. And you're terrible at managing boundaries."

This didn't feel like that sharp analysis Eloise was supposed to be excellent at offering. Eloise pointedly looked at Piere.

"You should know that's how it is." Eloise said acidly.

"You should know that's not true." Piere bit back.

A crack formed in the ice of her eyes. She finished her drink, sat the glass down on the table with a hard thud, and stood up.

"Just..." she considered her words, came up empty. "Just be careful, Piere."

Piere stood up, feeling some kind of wounded. "Have a good night, Eloise."

[Schima Bas]

A quick slice of life from the Golden Crescent midfield

The Golden Crescent had just returned to Schima Bas, arriving at Ourelasia International early in the morning. They had just under a week until they would meet Polkopia in a crucial qualifiying battle. While the mood was lightened by the recent win against Acceptably Normal, the 4-0 loss against the Dagans was still looming over the usually jubilant starting midfield unit. Still, the unit found ways to distract themselves in their shared accommodations.

Makin Moghaddam eyed the news while Bisma Shehadeh did performative situps and the young Raaji Attar attempted to get the best angles for a social media post. Attar, who had drawn the shortest straw at the start of qualifying, was unluckily forced into the position of Shehadeh’s social media manager, a revolving, unpaid position rewarded only with exposure. He was tasked with helping the hulk come up with new ways to keep his audience engaged across the player’s many social media sites. The idea of the day was peculiar to say the least.

After about the 20th recorded sit-up (Shehadeh had started the video counting up from 130), Attar began flinging fruit at the glistening midfield star, who caught each in his mouth on the upward ascent and spit it to the side on the decline. After successfully catching several lemons, oranges, and apples, Attar looked around in anxious panic.

“Where’s the second bowl of fruit?” he whispered, attempting to not be heard on the video recording over the ratter of upbeat electronic music.

“Makin! Where did I put it?” Attar said, louder.

“I don’t know. You’re the social media manager, you should be more organized,” the captain responded lazily, deep into an analysis of Basian regional trade relations.

“I didn’t ask for this!” Attar hissed back. “Leonard, do you see it?”

The right midfielder murmured to himself, ignoring his troubled teammate as his phone screen lit up and dinged audibly as he spoke into the microphone.

“Ka-Khai te-Be gromome yobne!”¹

“Never mind, I found it, useless lot!” Attar picked up a mango and tossed it at the gaping mouth of Shehadeh. What he probably didn’t expect was the fruit to be overripe, bashing into his head and spilling juice all over his face and chest.

“Oh ah- sorry Bisma!” The youngster stepped back in fear, knowing that the superstar could be wrathful in response. Luckily for him, Bisma only laughed.

“No, keep it! The ladies will love it!” Bisma wiped his face and got up. “Cut it right after it hits my face. Wow! Look at that, it got all over!” Bisma had an angry streak, yet he could just as easily find a positive in a negative situation, especially when it involved social media clout-chasing. “That’s hilarious!”

Attar breathed a sigh of relief before turning over to his unhelpful compatriots. “Thanks for the help you twat, what did you even say to me? I didn’t understand at all.” Attar decided to position his frustration towards Leonard Charbonneau instead of the veteran captain.

Charbonneau didn’t look up from his screen.

“Dur-ak. Durak!”² Charbonneau annunciated words in a foreign language.

“Is that another game of yours?” Attar questioned.

Finally Charbonneau answered, matter-of-factly. “No, I’m trying to learn Polkopian so I can shit-talk during our next match. It’s some new app that just launched, Bi.Lingo. You can learn a bunch of multiversal languages.”

“There’s a shit-talking section? Let me see!” Attar was quickly by his teammates’ shoulder.

When Gaio Grecio knocked on the door to summon the midfielders for a tactical meeting that evening, he found all of them in the middle of shouting various Polkopian insults at one another.

“Hopefully you can take something more away from that than another way to tell someone to F-off,” The manager sighed.

Polkopian Key

1: “Khai tebe gromome yobne” (May you fu***** get hit by thunder)

2: “Durak” (Idiot)

[South Newlandia]

[Abanhfleft]

Not-So-Young Guns, Part Six

Gylfi Bjarnasson Stadium
Norrdnhammr, Fleftic Antarctica
One week after the World Cup qualifying game against Kimi-Suomi

The football career of Karamoko Bakayoko was a strange one indeed. It started all the way back when he was just fourteen years old, and he had been called up to the under-18 team that Abanhfleft had sent to Filindostan for the 4th Under-18 World Cup. He was playing as a forward for the academy side of the Uranium City Radiation back then, and even back then he was already scoring goals for fun. He may have only been fourteen years old at the time, but the Samahang Futbol ng Abanhfleft saw massive potential in him and tried to take advantage of it by calling him up at such an early age. And for a while, it worked. Karamoko Bakayoko scored goals for fun at the under-18 level, and while he couldn’t help the Young Revolutionaries net any sort of footballing success while he was in the setup, he made his name well known because of his goalscoring ability and tendencies.

And then came that game against Starblaydia. It wasn’t necessarily the game where everything fell apart for young Karamoko, but it was the game where everything that had been building up behind the scenes was finally exposed for all of the multiverse to see. It exposed the fact that Karamoko was no longer the kind of striker he had been when he was banging in the goals in his younger days. For one, he was no longer as instinctive and playing by the seat of his pants as he used to. He was more controlling of the football around him. There were things that he wanted done this way or that or else he was not even going to bother. Starblaydia’s team had learned all of this, and they had adjusted their strategy accordingly to nullify any sort of threat that could possibly come from Karamoko, and it worked like a charm. Starblaydia held Karamoko Bakayoko to zero attempts and zero shots on target. And after that game, Karamoko Bakayoko was never the same. He was not called up to the senior national team, and after a few seasons playing for the Uranium City Radiation, Karamoko Bakayoko disappeared from the notice of the Fleftic public. Not even the most dedicated fans of the Uranium City Radiation knew where he had gone once his contract was not renewed by the club. And he wouldn’t pop up again until a video taken at a Sunday football league game in nearby Norrdnhammr went viral all over the country.

The video showed a black man wearing a referee’s uniform that was at least two sizes too big for him running up and down the sideline with the assistant referee’s flag. He was able to keep up with the game just as one would expect a linesman to do, but that wasn’t the surprising thing about the whole video. The video itself had been captioned, “Guess who just stepped in as a linesman after the other one got injured?” and as soon as it went viral, people were able to make the connection. Karamoko Bakayoko had been found once again. And he wasn’t even an actual linesman or any other refereeing official in football; he was just a spectator at the game who had volunteered to fill in for the other linesman after he had been injured by one of the players crashing into him. But beyond that thirty-second clip, there was nothing to indicate whether Karamoko was still actively playing football, or if he had quietly retired after the debacle with Starblaydia. And after that video had gone viral, dozens of football reporters descended upon Norrdnhammr to interview him and ask him what had happened, but Karamoko had rebuffed all of their advances. After having gotten his second taste of fifteen seconds of fame (or more accurately, thirty seconds in his case), Karamoko simply had no more interest in being in the public eye once again.

However, when someone from Karamoko’s past decided to pay him a visit, he was actually happy to receive them, a fact that surprised even Karamoko himself.

“I’m not going to lie, Kelly,” Karamoko said to his visitor, Kelly McGinnis. “I didn’t expect you to come down here and talk to me so soon after I went viral. Now, before I say anything else, you promise not to tell anything about this meeting between us to the press? I’ve had more than enough of all this attention being given to me, thank you very much.”

“I promise,” Kelly said. “Cross my heart and hope to die. If any of this comes out on the press, you can sue me for everything I’ve got.”

“Be careful, Kelly,” Karamoko said. “I might actually do it. Anyway, enough about that. Why are you here? Why do you want to talk to me?”

“Nothing specific, really,” Kelly waved off. “I just want to talk about whatever.”

“And whatever do you want to talk about?” Karamoko continued.

“I don’t know, really,” Kelly shrugged. “All right, let’s start from the beginning. The 4th Under-18 World Cup. You were on that team along with me, right? But I don’t recall ever talking to you back then. Is there any reason why you didn’t talk to any of us or…?”

Karamoko laughed softly. “Oh, yeah, I remember those days,” he said. “And would you believe me if I said that the answer to your question was something stupid like feeling like I was back in school? Come on now, Kelly. Almost all of you on that team were 16 and 17 at the time. Some were probably 18 too. I was the only 14-year-old in that team. If you were in my shoes, wouldn’t you do the same? Keep away from the older kids, I mean. I don’t know what your experience with older kids in school was, but that was definitely a big contributing factor to why I didn’t really hang out with you and your friends back in the day.”

“You know, if I’m being honest, I’ve never really thought about it like that,” Kelly muttered. “But now that you've said, I guess it does make sense.”

“Anything else you want to ask, then?” Karamoko asked. “Before you get to the big one.”

“Actually, no, that’s it,” Kelly replied. “That was the only other thing I wanted to ask you before the… what did you call them again? The big one?”

“Then what are you waiting for? Ask away then.”

“Why?” Kelly asked. “Why did you leave it all behind? What made you decide that football wasn’t all that it was cracked up to be? And where did you go after you dropped off the radar?”

“You want the simple answer or the long one?” Karamoko asked back.

“Does it make any difference? All right, I’ll bite. What’s the short answer?” Kelly asked.

“The short answer to your question is actually another question, although it’s probably a stupid question given that you’re the one I’m asking this. But did you see our two games during the international break? The one between Zeta Reka and Whatever and that new Nordic country?”

“Yeah, I did. But I don’t know how those games connect to my question,” Kelly admitted.

“This is where we get to the long version of my answer,” Karamoko said. “You of all people should know the history of our country’s football team more than most. I mean, you were right there as history was being made. How many games do you remember where you thought the team had the whole thing under control only for the other team to find a way back and snatch one point or even three from us?”

“Far too many to count,” Kelly admitted.

“And wasn’t that the same thing that happened last week? Especially against Kimi-Suomi?” Karamoko continued. “The Lady Revolutionaries were all cruising to victory, only for the other side to find a way to come back. Shit, where have we heard this story before? Did that happen last week, or last year? Maybe even a whole fucking decade ago? Do you see the pattern here or do I have to spell it out for you?”

“If you only agreed to see me because you wanted to vent your frustrations against Zeta Reka and Kimi-Suomi on me…” Kelly said.

“No, no, don’t worry, Kelly. You’re not the only one I’m frustrated about,” Karamoko shook his head. “I’m frustrated with the whole team. And not just the current one. Every single Abanhfleft national football team that’s ever played a single game in the World Cup, the Cup of Harmony, the Independents Cup, whatever other cup they’ve played in, they frustrate me every single time I see them. Ever since we started taking part in the World Cup, this team has never been like the old ones, the ones that only played against Copper Cuprum and Oontaz, the ones that played way before we were born. Even when I was playing for the team, it didn’t feel like the team that I had grown up idolizing. Our teams now have no strategy other than ‘score more than the other team.’ When I was in the team, I was the main source of goals, and I did everything that I could. When that didn’t work against Starblaydia, I realized that that was the final straw. That was when I realized that we had no other plan. All those tactics and strategies that the coaches talk about before the game, it’s all for nothing. And as for those that claim that there’s some sort of conspiracy going on to stop Abanhfleft from winning anything in football; they’re all crazy. There’s no need for a conspiracy if we keep shooting ourselves in the foot every time. You wanna know why I left the national team? That’s why. Because we have nothing else to do other than lump the ball to the striker and hope for the goddamn best. Now if there’s anything else that you want to ask me then you’ll just have to come back another time. I’m not in the mood to even think about football after you reminded me of all of that bullshit back in the day.”

        TIKARIOT 2 - 2 ABANHFLEFT       
NIGHTHORSE (58')       McGINNIS (29')
  CONNOLLY (71')       MAGOMEDOVA (42')

 ABANHFLEFT 0 - 1 AUDIOSLAVIA     
                  RIJSBERGEN (3')

STARTING ELEVEN VS. HAPILOPPER & DISPERTAG
GK: Bronwyn Churchill
DF: Queen Yarnall, Christy Shepley, Tiera Walrath, Georgine Baum
MF: Sibusizwe Kiggwancha, Charlene Williamson
Elene Liner, Prudence Woodward, Amelie Rusev
FW: Hiroko Kellerman

[Kandorith]

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Shinonome Kyoai - International

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Kandorith battles the number two in Group 20.

While still on top of the group, the battle for numbers one and two is becoming something Michiyu should worry about.
By Natsumi Miyasaki
Sports

^{SHARE THIS:}

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 PGroup 20                        Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
1 Kandorith                         9    6   2   1    21   14   +7    20
2 Squornshelan Remnant States       9    6   2   1    16    9   +7    20
3 Chartistan                        9    4   2   3    22   18   +4    14
4 The Sarian                        9    3   4   2    23   20   +3    13
5 StrayaRoos                        9    3   2   4    12   15   −3    11
6 Sendhang                          9    2   1   6    12   15   −3     7
7 The Republic of Western Sol       9    2   1   6    10   17   −7     7
8 Southwest Eastnorth               9    0   6   3    18   26   −8     6

The qualifiers are currently on a different note, with Squornshelan Remnant States close behind, with the number one and two spots almost tied. While on paper, the Kandorese team should be cruising to victory easily in these qualifiers, the reality is something different as the Dragons are currently looking at a 6-2-1-1 record and are being challenged by The Remnant States.

As Kandorith began the qualifiers, many people felt disappointed with the 3–3 draw against the Sarian, followed by a 2–0 defeat against Chartistan. Right now, there is no reason for panic, but these first results might come back to haunt the team that is still being praised by Michiyu. The start of the team has been met with a sceptical voice, yet has been growing towards a more positive view at the moment. For many Kandore fans, the hope rests on the shoulders of Michiyu and the results of the Dragons in the upcoming matches. The ultimate goal for the team is to qualify yet again and, from there, put down a solid performance in the group stage.

Whereas in the previous qualifiers, the Kandorese team showed absolute brilliance, it has now become a race against the number two in group 20 to stay ahead of the competition. Many fans are still waiting for yet another historical moment, a moment they have been waiting for since World Cup 89, but currently, it is a matter of not dropping any points during the qualifiers. The Kandorese team could have been ahead of the rest of the group in the match against the Remnant States, but the match ended in a draw, leaving both teams with the same goal difference and the same number of points. Right now, group 20 is completely undecided between numbers one and two.

For now, Michiyu seems untroubled by the results and has even been telling the press that the team has been improving. The upcoming games will show just what the team is capable of, as the rest of the qualifiers have been a collection of shaky results and a few lucky escapes for the Dragons. During the current qualifiers, the team has missed a few crucial chances at goal and is seemingly searching for the same vibe they had during the qualifiers before World Cup 89. Meanwhile, both the Remnant States and Kandorith are six points ahead of the number three, yet a lot could change in the remaining five matches as the team faces a tough schedule in the upcoming days.

The last two matches saw the Dragons beat the Sarian with a one-goal difference on an average of 3-2, followed by a 1-1 draw against the Squornshelan Remnant States. In both of these matches, the Kandorese team should have performed better and should have brought themselves into a more sturdy position on the group table. However, the reality is that the team is still searching for its place on the field and is indeed looking to find its flow after Michiyu changed the style of play for the team. While the team is on top of group 20, there are worries that the team is lacking in shuttling down the play when it comes to performing in high-tension matches. When asked, Michiyu had little to say and ensured that the team was playing at their best, and they would do anything to stop any further decay in points. "We are playing in a seemingly easy group, but we can not underestimate any opponent within this group," Michiyu stated. "I seriously think that we are doing all we can to avoid losing any points in the upcoming crucial matches. Right now, I see a very motivated squad that wants to stay on top of the group. With this feeling, we will be going into the upcoming matches and we will once again try to win to stay ahead of the competition, and yes, yes, it might come down to the very last game."

In the first part of the qualifiers, Michiyu relied heavily on a rotational squad, and currently, the final team is taking shape during the last matches of the qualifiers. With the end of the rotational starting team comes the question of whether the starting eleven are good enough to stay ahead in this group. While in the current campaign, the Kandorese national team is still performing wonderfully, there are worries about the upcoming games. With nine matches played, the Dragons are still in a shaky first place and any slip up could cost them the chance of qualifying directly or even see the team miss out on the qualifiers. The upcoming remaining matches will be crucial for the national team to keep themselves in first place and maintain their chances of qualifying directly.

[Montana Verde]

Nagore – 3 (2)
(16’), (30’), (90+1’)

Montaña Verde – 6 (3)
Dolfo; Zalladen (83’ Arquímedes ), Isidre Caldera, Jairo, Justin; Ana-Ximena; Valentinha (30’) (67’ Sara Ariadna (81’, 86’)), Julia Varela, Emma (63’ Nicandro ); Primitivo (18’, 42’, 67’); Osito (37’)

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Montaña Verde – 2 (2)
Dolfo; Zalladen, Arquímedes (29’) (88’ Magdalena ), Jairo, Justin; Ana-Ximena (63’) (68’ Santángel ); Valentinha, Primitivo, Julia Varela; Benji (70’ Indiano (85’)), Osito (12’)

Toro Castrado – 1 (0)
Etxeberria (66’)

From the website of the news magazine The New Week National Atlantic News Spectating Economist Time Man.

In A Jungle Junta, An Ambitious Bid Raises More Eyebrows Than Hopes

El Chavá, in Chiquidas province, is a coastal town. Once a hub of fishing, its native industries were wrecked when the Überolía supertanker Austurlenskur Fínni spilled 20,000 tons of crude oil into the waters into the Baja Diarojos. Families who had passed down fishing lures and crab traps over generations found themselves without a means of income as filthy sludge destroyed the breeding grounds of the Verdean Double Bass and Verdean Black Crab. The former economic vibrancy of El Chavá was once demonstrated by the intricacy of the gold leaf decorating the nave of its church; at the height of the famine that gripped the town a decade ago, the church had to mount 24 hour armed security to prevent looters trying to strip the paintwork to sell for a loaf of bread. In the dusty backstreets of El Chavá, barefoot children kick ragged ersatz footballs made up bundles of discarded cloth. Football is sacred here in a way that even the Catholicism of the faded church cannot claim. Yet even in soccer-mad El Chavá, news that Montaña Verde is bidding to host a major tournament is met with less than acclaim.

“Presidenta Santángel Hurtado promised us jobs,” says Gonzalo, who works irregular shifts at a bottle recycling plant. “Work, health care, schools. We have one clinic in town, and my children’s school doesn’t have cement floors, they sit on the bare ground for lessons. Why are we spending money on football?” Domingo, who once had a steady job at a canning factory – which now lies in rusting ruins – and who know picks up odd jobs tending gardens or doing road surfacing repairs, says: “If they can build a new stadium, then they can build us a new factory. But I think after the tournament, we will have a stadium and no factory. And in a few years, the new stadium will look just as bad.” The El Chavá council, who have been petitioning Santa Margarita for redevelopment funds for over a decade, were similarly less than enthused to receive two complimentary tickets to the opening ceremony – along with a hike in municipal service charges.

Few doubt the appetite for football in a country where the national team’s top players are venerated by chalk murals on every street corner, where every playground is filled with cries of “I’m Osito today, you were Osito last week!”, where even the poorly ranked Campeanato Nacional attracts sell-out crowds at every game. But many have reservations about the infrastructure demands on the small country, especially in light of the growth of the Copa de la Armonía field in recent tournaments. “32 international teams, plus reserves, plus team support staff, plus fans, plus organizational personnel… is Montaña Verde really equipped to have this many people descend on it?” queried opposition politician Geraldine Corona Saenz in the National Assembly last week, during an infrastructure in the wake of the fatal bridge collapse in Celaceo that killed 37 last month.

These are the kinds of questions that tournament organizers will have to face up to if they hope to win the trust of the World Cup Committee. The Federación Montaña Verdean de Fútbol is still an organization mired in mistrust and scandal following an embezzlement crisis just 2 years ago that led to the national team qualifying for but unable to attend the previous Copa de la Armonía. “To ask WCC voters to trust an organization that quite literally lined its own pockets is the height of optimism – and the depths of baseness wrote journalist Manuel Alcabú Cadaval in his column this week in El Heraldo. For Presidenta Santángel Hurtado, eager to promote investment and tourism to help revitalize a country blighted by civil war and narcoterrorism, the lure of hosting a big tournament is obvious. What’s less clear is whether such an attempt will advance her cause – or lead to humiliation on a truly international stage.

[Brookstation]

DID WE JUST WIN ?

by Trent Crimm

It has been six matchdays and the wait is finally over as Brookstation grabbed a win at Textentuck on Sunday after a prolonged period of time. In our previous enocounter, Brookstation had registered their first and only(till now) win with a 3 goal win over Texkentuck. This time was no different. For this match, coach Soham Misra didn't play the usual team but started with a secondary choice team perhaps to make sure that the first team is able to get adequate rest for the upcoming matches. Brookstation's qualifying campaign was pretty much a disaster as the team kept on losing for six whole matchdays but the win against Texkentuck just made things better by a morsel, if not by large. The win didn't appear to have much of an effect as the team continued it's other streak of not being able to win at home for the fourth time. Apart from Brookstation's pretty mediocre set of results, there have also been rumours suggesting the departure of Soham Misra from his position.

Brookstation faced Texkentuck and this was a match everyone was excited for. Brookstation started under their new 4-3-3 formation but the players kept on shuffling their position, playing under a tactic which was difficult to make out. Texkentuck were playing at home and thus they did have a somewhat greater advantage than our visiting team. The first few minutes of the game saw the ball stay in the middle of the field for most of the part as none of the attacks of either team was able to reach as far as the box. The game began to get interesting towards the latter part of the first half when both teams started opening opportunities. It must be pointed out that the match was quite aggressive considering the number of recorded fouls in the match. Both the teams received a number of free kicks but none could make anything out of it, although Texkentuck saw one of their shots hit the goalpost. The first half was nearing an end when the Textentuck winger volleyed the ball over to the box where their centre forward was ready to prance at the ball to head it in. Lance Logan came quite close to saving it but the ball eventually found it's way inside the goalpost. This lead acquired by Texkentuck was a worrying factor considering Brookstation's previous set of disappointing results. The half time mark had already made it's appearance but both teams had acquired four minutes of injury time. Brookstation as always utilized the extra few minutes. Brookstation received a free kick with only two minutes in hand. However it takes only a few seconds for the ball to enter the goal if it was going to and it actually did. Polnareff's shot swayed and found itself at the corner of the goalpost. The Texkentuck goalkeeper made an attempt to stop it but unfortunately he wasn't able to reach the ball. With that goal ended the first half.

The second half also saw a pretty similar style of play with both teams making the run towards the goal but the only difference was this time, Brookstation's attempts actually ended up working and Brookstation registered two goals to their name by the 70th minute. To be honest, there was actually nothing to be excited about these goals as these goals were scored against the lowest ranked team in the group but the very joy of seeing a win stirred an unexplainable happiness in our hearts for some reason. Texkentuck's style of play was similar throughout so it didn't take long for Brookstation to get a hang of what their opponents were doing and thus we were able to resist most of their attacks in the second half. Texkentuck however did score in the 82nd minute when their centre back got a comfortable header on the ball passed by their winger. Even if this win had no significance in real life, it will always be remembered as the match which broke the curse.

Texkentuck   2-3   Brookstation
unknown (40)       Polnareff (45+2)
unknown (82)       Robes (61)
                   Johnson (70)

Anyway, this happiness was short lived and didn't last for more than a day. Monday saw a beautiful weather in Brookstation and an influx of spectators into the Glass Animals Park. The win against Texkentuck must have been the reason for such a high turnout in the capital stadium. The match could not go any more intense and the match ended as another high scoring one with seven goals scored in total. The team led by Ken Hayabusa disappointed the entire crowd after registering a win in Brookstation.
Yuezhou were utterly dominant for the first few minutes and Brookstation typically struggled to get the ball to their feet. The players fired wild attempts at the goal but Logan did a great job at the goal. Yuezhou made almost around 4 close attempts within the first 25 minutes of the game. One of the shot hit the post, one went wide and the other two were saved by the fast gloves of Logan. However Brookstation couldn't get lucky each and every time and finally Yue Zhou found the net at the 31st minute when Luo Dan made a sudden run towards the goal and funnily enough none of our great men at defense was able to stop the mighty Dan who after putting in all that effort reached a close position from where he made a pass to Shedong who didn't take long to give his team the lead. Needless to say Yue Zhou scored another couple of goals within the remaining few minutes of the first half and the sad part was all we could do was sit and stare at Yuezhou causing destruction.

It would be right to say that Soham and his men had come up with some technique which might have been able to turn the tables. This tactic worked in the second half as we saw captain Robes score a brace within a span of twenty minutes. This tactic was somewhat effective but not the perfect one. Yuezhou striked once more in the 75th minute when captain Li Jing reached a comfortable place in the corner from where he made one of the most beautiful passes I have ever witnessed which reached the box straight to Huiying who was marked by Logan. Huiying decided to pass the ball to Dan who shot at a pretty much empty goal. Brookstation's tactic was effective but by the time Soham Misra actually came up with it, it was already very late. Yue Zhou had three goals compared to us having none. Thus the odds of Brookstation winning was practically 0. This was one of the most humiliating defeat we faced at home and the fact that we made it so close but yet ended so far makes things worse.

Brookstation  3–4   Yuezhou
Robes (49,63)       Dan (31,76)  
Jacks (78)          Huiying (39) 
                    Sheping (44)

What to expect next ?

Nothing, absolutely nothing at all. One win against the lowest seeded team of the group shouldn't be sufficient to give anyone the hopes of further progress. One must keep in mind that Brookstation has not won a game at home for the last five matchdays and winning the next home game (against South Newlandia) is highly unlikely. This is definitely not an indication towards anything positive. Our next opponents are the table toppers Zwangzug and South Newlandia. Both teams have defeated Brookstation in their first encounter and are likely to do so again. This is going to start another streak of losses and see Brookstation lose three consecutive games. The next matchdays are also going to see Brookstation have a steep drop in their position in the table. Thus all, one can hope for at this point is that Brookstation loses the upcoming games with some dignity and we don't get eliminated already.

[Geektopia]

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Categorium: Work (Curated by Migueis in Geektopia) edited by Atham Tasasubsil in Burur cak Noaqsi)[/tab]
Automobiles (Curated by Naumovic in Geektopia) edited by Christoffer Cappuyns in Chica Saw)
Amusement (Curated by Zahharov in Geektopia) edited by Corion Icepis Samarneta in Aimena)
Household (Curated by Palime in Geektopia) edited by Kalijat Hink in Unimon)
Good Physical Condition (Curated by Blard in Geektopia) edited by Edtacio Bezerra in Campo de Ervas)
Government (Curated by Podjasek in Geektopia) edited by Eskanova Singleton in Sponsertivity)
Faith (Curated by Nke in Geektopia) edited by Taire Ah Oak Guru in Sainterris)
Branch of Knowledge (Curated by Rehnström in Geektopia) edited by Aguilḻar Mendoza Sanafan Ţluknaṟbire in Islas Cardinales)
Competitive Games (Curated by Rifiño in Geektopia) edited by Andreika Rararch Sigi in Aimena)
Technology (Curated by Tschšppeler in Geektopia) edited by Shuan Zawadkun in Aimena)
Travel (Curated by Courtieux in Geektopia) edited by Tamir Tater in Aimena <======= You are here.
Popular Media & Economy (Curated by Sulkumški in Geektopia) edited by Margharita Abbate in La Fiorita)
Multiverse (Curated by El Baraka in Geektopia) edited by Eva Mariska II Purrlicious Chowder Chocolate in Islas Cardinales)

Conglang enClave #009 - Ne
Lessons 1 and 2 <> Lessons 3 and 4 <> Lessons 5 and 6 <> Lessons 7 and 8

I'm trying // Vèon eh oìgqpki esovsdje

Anyhow, these aren't the patron words of Abdel-Dayem in writing, but I hope I can give you readers a warm welcome back to the language series which had great expectations and popularity in the country, out of the continent, and into the multiverse, but fell short after eight editions. Where then, the Geektivities journal couldn't find someone who specialized as a translator and could explain the Geektopian tongue in a clear manner, they have hopefully found one in me. There's so many things the site moderator and CEO could have told her, though after the fact of Abdel-Dayem's departure, he then goatishly and quite immaturely posted a job notice without telling the rest of his underlings, such as Hondorola, Gerew, and Marshall while he also didn't give Abdel-Dayem a very good sendoff either, thinly disguising her resignation for a rival newsletter by implying in the notice that she was still employed at the time of writing. These are all very bad business decisions, but our CEO in post as of nine hundred years ago Sulo knows this. In the meantime, he keeps his staff in check from every article, as if he was an editor, while also responsibly micromanaging the editors, telling them to sweep the article for grammatical errors, plagiarism, and bending of the truth. There is just no way to hide the dour umbrella of corruption our news site was under just a few thousand years ago, though these bad memories will fade from even the most scathing of critics for every good article which is curated, so we try to do that also.

It is recommended that the phrase "I am trying" be taken into lexicon. While in English you know the phrase to be a cry of information, that as in you or another person informing someone of their attempt to make an attempt or effort to do something, or (not discussed in this lesson) subject someone to trial. By adding a verb while trying to verbalize, write out, or type out the phrase, this effort will be significantly helped and by these means what it is you are attempting to do is explicated in every detail. Anyhow, the subject word comes into the shape of that of "vèon". Mind you, this is only the second example in which you have seen this subject word written out, while "vene/ve ne/vè" are much more popular alternatives as well as rampant in many interpersonal communication and conversations. Vèon is usually a stay-at-home type subject word. Meaning that you are limited to say it within the confines of your own home or somebody else's abode, while the latter three are comfortably interchanged in social settings which are almost always convivial. For the first example, it's quite embarrassing to say you don't have a job within the country, and folks treating you may change their minds when it comes to your staying within their house for dinner, so this is why the "stay-at-home type subject word" is used here.

Some examples would be: "Vèon eh esojsofe emploutqv e jègom" (translating to oneself expressing their need to get a job) |[]| "Vèon eh esojsofe jeovnviep e jecovp et un jofspíef" (translating to oneself having trouble trying to enjoy their dinner) |[]| "Ve ni eh esojsofe ni òuhq e jònpaò" (translating to oneself trying to account for themselves by way of explanation) |[]| "Vèon eh esojsofe vjoi hu òmetmaòvop" (translating to oneself expressing their trying to eat healthy food)

Of course, we don't talk about idioms in this place, most a Geek won't pick up what you're putting down when it comes to those. Though not exactly a shining light in the replacement of idioms, alternate definitions of words exist, without the word itself taking shape to be pronounced or spelt another way. For one, you're also going to hear these words in a different context, while they are meant to express the way someone is feeling. In this respect, it evidences a feeling of vexation or tautness.

Some examples (again) would be: "Ot iògfso has suqtòiet iefdose ì afseò e iòsjvedi iomt ep cinep jìdoim (translating to oneself clamoring about how it's such a trying thing to smoothen things over with the wife) |[]| "Ot esovsdje ì eòdmpòo e jocjuefd aett (translating to oneself saying how picking up girls is trying on their patience)

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Conlang enClave #010 - Ke

I am going to // Ve ni eh fam hu vòf

Ve ni will also be used sparingly. Though it's a grammatically incorrect Geektopian pair of words and vene would be the more correct subject word, this only goes to show how later generations which live in the country are getting dumber and dumber. At the least, why wouldn't you want to try to appeal to the kids? Just use this word pair, it may be the English equivalent of "gonna" or "ain't", but certain folks who you're talkin' with may cue in and listen, besides walking away disinterestedly. Anyways, in the event of you using this word, you're effectively telling someone your course of action, put simply, what you intend to do in a place, at a time, and/or to an object or person.

Some examples present themselves to be: "Ve ni japd smaès ì" (translating to oneself telling you of their intent to "floor it") |[]| "Ve ni japd uospvp eosdsofì e vjoi" (translating to oneself telling you of their intent to eat carrot cake) |[]| "Ve ni japd òsiò et ep iemce" (translating to oneself telling you of their intent to get out of bed) |[]| "Ve ni japd stupparenin e mù" (translating to oneself telling you of their intent to stop drinking) |[]| "Ve ni japd piedepdevj pètnej e jmhjeefd " (translating to oneself telling you of their intent to enroll in a swimming course)

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Geektopia 4-2 Saint Eleanor <> 26,977 @ Place of Valence, Mukladrue, Geektopia
Goals: 20' by #33 Pitter (assisted by #11 Zalie 'amquk | GEE | right-footed shot), 26 ' by #17 Rolke (assisted by #4 Livengood | GEE | right-footed shot), 45' by #5 Paul Ferry (assisted by #2 Luke Gregory | SAE | left-footed shot), 57' by #33 Pitter (assisted by #3 Autianna 'ardiquswaa | GEE | header), 66' by #13 Julio (assisted by #3 Autianna 'ardiquswaa | GEE | header), 90' by #10 Aidan Harris (assisted by #9 Katie O'Donnell | SAE | left-footed shot)

Substitutions: 1' || #9 Shammami in for replacement of #20 Rinnert
1' || #7 Abdill in for replacement of #30 Ponti
22' || #13 Julio in for replacement of #26 Gerking
22' || #17 Rolke in for replacement of #11 Zalie 'amquk
31' || #29 Diminno in for replacement of #23 Rebimbas

PLAYER'S MARKS:
SWADLEY: 7.0
AUTIANNA 'ARDIQUSWAA: 7.9
PITTER: 8.9
LIVENGOOD: 7.5
REBIMBAS: 7.0 ↓
GERMAINE SOPHIE: 7.0
MATKOWSKI: 6.9
GERKING: 7.0 ↓
PONTI: 7.0 ↓
RINNERT: 6.9 ↓
ZALIE 'AMQUK: 7.5 ↓
---------------------------------------------
LERTORA: 7.0
SHAMMAMI: 7.0 ↑
ABDILL: 7.0 ↑
JULIO: 8.0 ↑
ROLKE: 8.0 ↑
DIMINNO: 7.0 ↑
WITRAGO: 7.0
LIERIN MINILINSIRTAYTFAH Y NAYJ: 7.0
JAKIUS KRUTIQAYIR TARUN: 7.0

Qasden 4-1 Geektopia <> 68,615 @ Stade de Solis, Fyre, Qasden
Goals: 24' by #5 Joanna Rigby (assisted by no-one | QAS | penalty), 37' by #16 Marco Bruno (assisted by #17 Shug de la Fontaine | QAS | right-footed shot), 52' by #11 Zalie 'amquk (assisted by #7 Abdill | GEE | right-footed shot), 56' by #8 Aristide Quickley (assisted by #5 Joanna Rigby | QAS | left-footed shot), 82' by Shug de la Fontaine (assisted by #16 Marco Bruno | QAS | left-footed shot)

Substitutions: 1' || #7 Abdill in for replacement of #30 Ponti
4' || #18 Germain Sophie in for replacement of #13 Julio
18' || #16 Witrago in for replacement of #26 Gerking
18' || #17 Rolke in for replacement of #9 Shammami

PLAYER'S MARKS:
LERTORA: 5.9
AUTIANNA 'ARDIQUSWAA: 5.5
PITTER: 6.0
LIVENGOOD: 6.0
REBIMBAS: 6.0
JULIO: 5.9 ↓
GERMAINE SOPHIE: 6.0
GERKING: 5.9 ↓
PONTI: 6.0 ↓
SHAMMAMI: 6.0 ↓
ZALIE 'AMQUK: 7.0
---------------------------------------------
HIGGINBOTTOM: 6.0
ABDILL: 6.5 ↑
GERMAIN SOPHIE: 6.0 ↑
WITRAGO: 6.0 ↑
ROLKE: 6.0 ↑
THORUD: 6.0
DIMINNO: 6.0
JAKIUS KRUTIQAYIR TARUN: 6.0
LIERIN MINILINSIRTAYTFAH Y NAYJ: 6.0

Geektopia 1-0 The Karodin Tetrarchy <> 25,933 @ Place of Valence, Mukladrue, Geektopia
Goals: 8' by #18 Germain Sophie (assisted by #7 Abdill | GEE | header)

Substitutions: 7' || #7 Abdill in for replacement of #3 Autianna 'ardiquswaa
16' || #16 Witrago in for replacement of #13 Julio
33' || #29 Diminno in for replacement of #23 Rebimbas
33' || #17 Rolke in for replacement of #9 Shammami

PLAYER'S MARKS:
HIGGINBOTTOM: 7.0
AUTIANNA 'ARDIQUSWAA: 7.0 ↓
GERMAIN SOPHIE: 7.0
LIVENGOOD: 6.9
REBIMBAS: 6.9 ↓
GERKING: 7.0
GERMAINE SOPHIE: 7.9
JULIO: 7.0 ↓
PONTI: 7.0
SHAMMAMI: 7.0 ↓
ZALIE 'AMQUK: 7.0
---------------------------------------------
LERTORA: 7.0
ABDILL: 7.5 ↑
WITRAGO: 7.0 ↑
DIMINNO: 7.0 ↑
ROLKE: 7.0 ↑
OGRODOWSKI: 7.0
JAKIUS KRUTIQAYIR TARUN: 7.0

Geektopia 0-1 Britonisea <> N/A @ N/A, Britonisea
Goals: 20' by #5 Tomas Martense (assisted by #1 Blake Johnson | BRI | right-footed shot)

Substitutions: 6' || #29 Diminno in for replacement of #26 Gerking
17' || #35 Ratter in for replacement of #11 Zalie 'amquk
17' || #4 Livengood in for replacement of #6 Germaine Sophie
33' || #7 Abdill in for replacement of #30 Ponti
33' || #20 Rinnert in for replacement of #17 Rolke

PLAYER'S MARKS:
LERTORA: 6.0
AUTIANNA 'ARDIQUSWAA: 6.0
GERMAIN SOPHIE: 6.0
PITTER: 5.9
REBIMBAS: 6.0
GERKING: 6.0 ↓
GERMAINE SOPHIE: 5.9 ↓
JULIO: 6.0
ROLKE: 6.0 ↓
ZALIE 'AMQUK: 6.0 ↓
PONTI: 6.0 ↓
---------------------------------------------
SWADLEY: 6.0
DIMINNO: 6.0 ↑
RATTER: 6.0 ↑
LIVENGOOD: 6.0 ↑
ABDILL: 6.0 ↑
RINNERT: 6.0 ↑
WITRAGO: 6.0
OGRODOWSKI: 6.0

Winnebogan 0-3 Geektopia <> N/A @ N/A, Winnebogan
Goals: 2' by #20 Rinnert (assisted by #26 Gerking | GEE | left-footed shot), 45+3' by #30 Rolke (assisted by #4 Livengood | GEE | left-footed shot), 71' by #26 Witrago (assisted by #13 Julio | GEE | right-footed shot)

Substitutions: 1' || #4 Livengood in for replacement of #8 Matkowski
1' || #17 Rolke in for replacement of #30 Ponti
15' || #7 Abdill in for replacement of #11 Zalie 'amquk
36' || #16 Witrago in for replacement of #26 Gerking

PLAYER'S MARKS:
LERTORA: 6.9
AUTIANNA 'ARDIQUSWAA: 6.9
GERMAIN SOPHIE: 7.0
PITTER: 7.0
REBIMBAS: 7.0
GERKING: 7.5 ↓
MATKOWSKI: 7.0 ↓
JULIO: 7.5
PONTI: 7.0 ↓
RINNERT: 8.0
ZALIE 'AMQUK: 7.0 ↓
---------------------------------------------
HIGGINBOTTOM: 7.0
LIVENGOOD: 7.5 ↑
ROLKE: 8.0 ↑
ABDILL: 7.0 ↑
WITRAGO: 8.0 ↑
GERMAINE SOPHIE: 7.0
RINGWALD: 7.0
JAKIUS KRUTIQAYIR TARUN: 7.0
RATTER: 7.0