This is a communication from Sorci Corporation's Office of Finances to the international community at large. Any and all contents of this message are property and released at the discretion of the Office of Finance alone, and may not represent the views of Sorci Corporation as a whole, nor do they serve as any binding contract for future actions of Sorci or any of its affiliates.
Dear Esteemed Colleagues, Heads of State, Leaders, Future Associates, and Others,
Allow me to introduce myself.
My name is Sebastion Lorales, and I am here on behalf of Sorci Corporation to ask you a series of questions about your nation’s reserves of hand held weapondary. An answer is by no means required of any or all, but you might find these questions as much of use for your future endeavors as they are for mine. You see, Sorci is at heart a member of the global arms trade, and for us to streamline our approach to business, we need to do some field work.
At Sorci, your national defense is our concern. As such, we have created a questionnaire to find out what weapons are most in demand in your nation. Prices and sales will be forthcoming at a later date, as will be further information on additional topics. However, as a bonus to the pragmaticly minded of you, we will be putting out a report of all the data we’ve gathered in two weeks time. For those who value your nation’s privacy, don’t fret! This report, while visible to all, will not break the results down by country, and as such the data we gather will be shared with only the most trusted manufacturers and procurement specialists based on Sorci soil, so your secrets are safe with us. However, due to the contents of this survey, I must now say a statement my lawyers forced me to prepare- “Sorci Corporation in general and the Office of Finances in particular is under no obligation or responsibility to undergo any loss of revenue or essential personnel defending any other sovereign nation’s information, classified or not, as a result of this questionnaire, and therefore resolves itself from any duties forthwith. Sorci Corporation also reserves the right to unequivocally reject or refuse to include any information in the following report it sees as an attempt to mislead or injure any interested party or Sorci Corporation.”
And now that that’s out of the way, onto the questions! For the purpose of this questionnaire, the following weapons are defined as follows:
And there we go, all the definitions to catch you up to speed. The questionnaire is linked right after my message, and is much less painful than it looks. It’s been a pleasure doing business with you all today, and I hope to receive your country's response shortly. If you have any concerns with this questionnaire or any other communication we have put out, please don’t hesitate to reach out to any of our representatives. We’d love to speak with you. Sorcian representatives may ask questions of concepts we don't understand about any firearms or weapons you discuss, or on topics we find interesting in your response for the purpose of furthering our own understanding. If you wish to opt out of possible discussions, please include the following pass phrase to trigger our alert system: I do not wish to be contacted by Sorcian Representatives.
Sincerely,
Sebastion Lorales
Chief of Financial Operations
Sorci Corporation
Questionnaire is as follows: