World Cup 90--RP Thread

by **Nephara** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 5:35 pm

THE HERALD
QUALIFYING PREVIEW - CORMORANTS TO CHALK ONE OFF BUCKET LIST
Brunnya Hornek Football Correspondent

As has been the case for the past decade, Nephara enter the World Cup with expectations high. While the main squad arrive off the back of disappointment, the Eagles Cup side enjoyed the high of a final, albeit mixed with the low of losing that final. Most impressive and useful to Triffid Ramsey was the defensive solidity on display, giving plenty of food for thought for what the side will look like come qualification.

It's a side in some degree of transition in any case, with a number of star names hitting their 30s and being phased out. But Aranea Provost, Lothaire Cromwell and Latona Basilisk are three of the best in their positions in the game - one could make a case Provost is the best, and that Cromwell was. Strong, tough and technically skilled, Ramsey's main challenge will be ensuring her side can hold their nerve, not let their rivals drag them down into a more open game, rather grinding out workmanlike 2-0 wins. Make no mistake, Nephara will be standout favourites for qualification. But these things are rarely predictable. Who stands a chance of knocking them off the top?

Well, IA Quebec will fancy their chances, having accomplished the feat once before. Under Fabrizio Kaal, the faces may be new - the side is young, and on the rise, with Eloise Kweon and Babin familiar as emerging stars of the Zenith and Sandra Middleton, just having signed for Coret, being effectively Nepharan herself - but the style of football is familiar, full-octane aggression on and off the ball. But the Reapers also boast toughness at the back - they need it, so as not to constantly be overrun - with McGibbon a fine shot-stopper, likely with the young partnership of Kim and An Seung-Mi - 22 and 21 respectively - holding court ahead of them. Middleton isn't the only familiar name in the side, of course, with the mercurial Enrico Hanson-Conavacio leading the line. Well, 'mercurial' is perhaps an understatement. Calling Enrico 'mercurial' is like calling the inside of a volcano 'toasty'.

They should also have a degree of home advantage, given that they will host Nephara in... a jail, right in a freezing wasteland. The Cormorants were quick to announce a new thermalwear partnership not long after the draw was made. Quebec will fancy their chances at pipping Nephara to first place not only because they've done it before, but because they have the quality. They were able to go toe-to-toe with the Cormorants in the Eagles Cup just a month ago, and now with both sides' best players returning to the fold, the encore will be one to watch.

Barunia represent rather less of a known quantity. While they are now Nephara's sole surviving Baptism of Fire 51 compatriots, the two sides have somehow never played in the half-century since. Another attack-minded outfit, the Suns will fancy themselves to cause Nephara problems down their tough spine, with a narrow formation at which captain Louis Cartwright accompanies the veteran she deposed, Neville Swan, in the heart of midfield. The long-overdue meeting of Sun and Cormorant may not be the kind of fixture neutrals are necessarily circling on the counter, but it's the closing of a long-standing statistical oddity. One imagines highly-rated manager Liesel McLelland will fancy her chances of a scalp at home.

Shane Newman's Flocking Blues will also be eager to break into the top two. A tight-knit team of veteran players, Indusse's pool may be small, but they know one another inside out, playing with a chemistry that makes them more than the sum of their parts. While Baskar H. Kumar is the undoubted star of the outfit, the conduit through most attacking moves - and, frequently, the finisher as well - the goalkeeper Steve Leghorn has won them points on his own. The Cormorants will need to be clinical, while making sure that yet another attack-minded team, like Barunia and Quebec, will not be able to unsettle their blocks.

One of the most famous names in the group is of course Milchama, though they are still building back up to their former strength. While their star man is Ittai Watson, the 23-year old captain marshalling the back line, Milchama are another decidedly attack-minded outfit, just like the enigmatic Pekoland. Baptism of Fire semifinalists, they have high aspirations, though their squad is... odd. Between the purported three-year old, the alleged half-dragon and the pudgy princess, there's a lot to unpack, peko. Natanians, Nosts and New Zhengguo round out a group with plenty of depth, flavour and potential for disaster. Will Ramsey hold her nerve, will the Cormorants sail through in top place? Well, probably. But there's no such thing as an easy qualifying stage, and the moment you think there might be one, the cruel mistress that is football smacks you hard.

by **Pasarga** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 5:41 pm

"An uninspiring last World Cup qualifiers and Finals followed by a very disappointing and vastly underwhelming performance in the Copa Rushmori, you would have thought that Kirk McDonagh would have lost their job. Hard to believe that they managed to survive not making it out of the group stages of the Copa when the Wanderers are typically one of the teams that are favored to be contending for the title, even if it has been a bit of a Nephara, Eura, and Savojarna show as of late. The regional tournament is usually where the Wanderers are able to shine, even if they are not doing particularly well in the Finals, see that tournament that the side managed to win after the failure of not qualifying for the first time in recent memory."

"The way I hear it is that the PFA are trying to appear patient so not as to scare off potential applicants when the position does become open, as it seems very unlikely like McDonagh is going to be able to survive to the end of qualifiers. A bad patch of form and that likely is that for the Kelssek manager, no clear indicator of whom the PFA would like to appoint afterwards though, as both domestic and foreign applicants have had a bit of a rough go of it. Though maybe we are all going to be played for fools and McDonagh will not repeat his history of having the team have to struggle through the qualification process and barely make it into the Finals, as has been the case the last three editions of the tournament for the Wanderers. It would be a welcome change of fortune and a surprise, but I do not think that anyone is really believing that is going to be on the cards, not with the group that the Wanderers were drawn into."

"Yeah, there is a lot of talented sides in the group and with only one spot to play for to make the Finals, going to be tough to try and navigate. You got sides like Poafmersia who have been at recent World Cup Finals, former greats in The Licentian Isles who seem like they are back on the uptick again and looking to really stretch their legs, as well as talented teams like Havynwilde and Saltstead. Nothing is going to be easy about this group in the least and the Wanderers are likely going to be in for a battle through the entirety of the qualifying cycle. Two of the last three cycles they needed massive comebacks in the second half of the campaign, not to mention other teams having to slip up and lose their own form in order to advance and a few of those groups were even more dangerous than this one."

"I suppose that difficulty in the group draw as well as the recent struggles for form do explain the vastly expanded national pool that McDonagh has made available, almost the entire defense is full of new faces. That is to be expected however with the way that the Copa played out, the defense being found out to be too slow and out of place to keep pace. Going to be a lot of a fresh faces for the fans to have to get familiar with and come to cheer on with the publication of the pool. There are a few areas of strength, though I would hate for it to really come down to seeing if Salai is ready to lead this team on his shoulders alone, even if he did get the big money move to Audioslavia."

"He and the rest are going to have ample opportunities to prove their worth for the national team I would wager and it all begins on the road with the team traveling to the Atlantic Republic. We do not have much information to go on for the team and I do not think that the Wanderers have made acquaintances with the team before, although the team getting to play at home on the opening matchday is definitely going to boost their morale. The Wanderers had some troubles traveling last cycle, an early victory on the road would probably ease some of that tension and maybe even give McDonagh the boost he needs moving on through the rest of the campaign to keep the team playing up to their top ten rank and keep his job."

by **Savigliane** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 6:06 pm

LA REPUBBLICA
SAVIGLIANE - KO-OREN: LEFEVRE THRUST INTO SPOTLIGHT AHEAD OF CRITICAL OPENER
Nico Innocenti, Sports

STADIO DEL PIERO, ACQUI BOLLENTE -- When the Savigliano National Team takes the field at Stadio del Piero in just a few hours to set off their journey to World Cup 90, held in Vilita and Baker Park, they will be doing so under an unfamiliar face. With twice-Galactico manager Tlanx-Nulzk Hal sidelined due to food poisoning, Corinne Lefevre will become the first Savigliano in over eight years to lead I Cigni into battle against defending champions Ko-oren. Consensus favorites to win qualifying group 13, and with it an automatic berth to the World Cup Finals, the Dragonflies play a unique brand of counterattacking "post-football" that seems perfectly poised to take advantage of the open, attacking style that is Tlanxball. As such, the Swans will need to be at their peak - and the neophyte Lefevre at her most creative - if Savigliane want to make a play for the first seed.

The defending champions are relatively settled, but major questions surrounding the continuance of their championship-winning core remain - will this cycle be a last hurrah for the core, or will Katherine Davenport prioritize transition over supporting the existing team? To be fair, they're easier questions than "how do we stop losing to Murphtannia" - Tlanx-Era Savigliane is by all accounts in free-fall after consecutive failures in World Cup 89 qualifying, the Cup of Harmony, and the CAFA. With the Qusmi legend out of contract at the conclusion of qualifying, we could be staring down major stylistic and personnel changes in the near future for this team, which has already been significantly disrupted by the retirement of the likes of Francesco Grimaldi, Amara Vatrican, and Bianca Fiore. Still, just three years removed from an appearance in the last sixteen of the World Cup, the Swans will be looking to surprise Ko-oren and right the ship with their high-flying, aggressive style of play. An upset victory over the defending champions would be the perfect way for this team to annonuce that they've still got it after a disappointing cycle - although any other result still leaves them on track to grab a playoff spot.

The Swans will be led by new assistant coach-turned-interim manager Corinne Lefevre. Relatively unknown outside of diehard circles, Lefevre made her name first at AS Villeneuve's youth academy, and then with Saint-Adelin des Mercantores. With a focus on youth development and attractive attacking play, she elevated Saint-Adelin from the second tier to consistent IFCF battlers, and developed star youngsters like Anne-Marie Roux (now with Kirkenes) and Alessandro Bella (also moved to Kelssek). Her move to Vreton United in Bollonich has seem her fade from the national limelight somewhat, although she's consistently guided the Twin Premier League club to strong - but not league-winning - finishes. But she does tick off all the boxes - young, Savigliano, excellent at player development and management, and independently discovering a Tlanxball-esque style - to be a contender to succeed Tlanx-Nulzk Hal if the FA don't opt for any stylistic shifts. And a win over Ko-oren would certainly elevate her national profile.

Lefevre's team is unaffected by injury, and she's opted to play Tlanx's strongest eleven to open the campaign - with the exception of substituting Calliope Montevecchi for Zoë Barthelemy. Ko-oren play with a five-at-the-back setup that negates the 3-2-5 that Tlanxball tends to shift into relatively well, and Lefevre is hoping that the additional dynamism and playmaking of Montevecchi will allow for more aggression in the box and potential central overloads that the touchline-hugging Barthelemy can't quite offer. Even then, breaking down the Dragonflies will prove a tough task that will ask the most out of the newly-assembled front line of Rossi, Squarciafichi, and Montevecchi - and with the likes of Longchambon and Erisia waiting to strike on the counterattack, the back line - whose flanks are noticeably weak under Tlanxball with Vitale and Lamontagne pushing forwards - will have to remain vigilant. Either way, tonight will be a fascinating clash of styles from opposing corners of Anaia - and the first of many chances for Savigliane to get back on track.

by **Oberour Ar Moro** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 6:31 pm

Domestic Football Team Refuse Multiversal Call-Ups
By Liçzenn Gestiau

The Dragoons of Oberour Ar Moro are travelling to the Euran Oceania Territories for the beginning of their World Cup 90 qualification attempt. But three particular players from the Oberour short-list won't be travelling with them.

Left Winger Iust de Bonere, Center Midfielder Renan Durerie, and Sweeper Peire de Baingneus have not been permitted to travel with the team by their team Regium Immortal.

"The player pool has 53 players earmarked for 14 games, which is obscene," complained Regium Immortal manager Merard Mouschard, "And [National Team Manager] Perresson Coffriere seems to want every single one at a moment's notice."

Mouschard made his comments in a contentious press conference after the team's latest practice. He continued "There's this further expectation that they players in the national team pool will train together as well. So not only do my players get worn down after travelling internationally and playing tough games, but they also have to train apart from the team as well."

A frustrated Perresson Coffriere responded in a media availability before travel to the Euran Oceania Territories. "I'm sure Merard remembers that I've managed in the Premier Division too," he noted. "It could be frustrating at the time to not have Gwion du Bourc-la-Reyne or Brevalan Gaspard as available as I would have liked. But there's more to this than just domestic play. Show a little patriotism!"

The Football Management Committee, which oversees both the Oberour Ar Moro National Football Team and the Football System has not yet made a formal response to Mouschard. However, Cécile le Vallet, a spokeswoman for the committee did respond to Antenne Sports to say that the Committee was aware of Mouschard's comments and would be responding appropriately after review.

"I think as time goes on more managers will be holding out their players until we have more control. I know speak for a lot of the managers who are tired of seeing their best players get misused on the national team. I mean, any manager in Oberour Ar Moro with a young sweeper like Piere de Baingneus would want to make sure his time is being used well."

"When did you first see the wound in the world?"

Peire de Baingneus leaned back against the alley wall then turned right to look at his interrogator. The young woman pulled a pack of cigarettes out of her purse and pulled one out, putting it to her mouth and lighting it, the very picture of nonchalance. A very practiced, very intense, very fictional nonchalance. She wanted to hear what he had to say.

Peire turned his head away to look down at his feet as he started to speak. "I was on the team bus. This was last year; I'd say eight months ago." How loud should he speak? He didn't want to shout, but he wanted to be heard over the music playing on from the bar nearby. "We were on our way back to Regium after playing in Calchedon. I guess I had fallen asleep on the way, with my head against the glass. I woke up and we were in Regium driving across the Blavet Bridge. It was late and dark. And suddenly we stopped."

Piere lifted his head. The young woman's cigarette glowed in his peripheral vision.

"But it wasn't like the driver hit the brakes. It was like the bus had never been moving at all. Everything was so still. And the river..."

A late-night breeze picked up. Peire wished he was wearing a jacket.

"...there was a gaping wound where the river was. Blood and muscle and ooze. It reminded me when my leg was gashed open in practice when I was in primary school. And this wound stretched under the bus and the bridge for kilometers."

This was ridiculous. He'd never spoken this out loud before and hearing it himself sounded insane. She was going to call the police, have him committed. She didn't move.

"This wound replacing the river. Did you see where it went?" She asked, her voice cool and deep in a practiced way.

"There were channels and whatever extending out, but I'd say it was heading out towards Père-Blessé? Except there was this massive...shadowy tower...thing? Everything was dark on black."

The woman's cigarette was burning away uselessly in her fingers, she hadn't lifted it to her lips for some time. She spoke again, urgency creeping into her voice. "And the bus. Where were the other passengers? What did you see?"

"There wasn't anyone there when I turned to look. Empty. And I think there were cars on the bridge as well and I didn't see anyone there either. It was like the apocalypse. But then everyone came back."

"They came back?" The woman was very interested in hearing the conclusion of his story.

"No one was there, and the bus wasn't moving and then the rest of the team was there, and the bus was moving. It was as if the bus had always been moving and everyone had always been there. It felt like it was all over in a minute."

The woman dropped her cigarette to the asphalt and ground it out under her heel. She then pulled out her cell phone and checked the time. "Has this happened again."

Peire nodded. "If I'm awake late enough I'll know I'm...somewhere else. I can't see the river or anything from my apartment, but I'll know."

The woman kept her eyes on her phone. "Have you ever walked out into it? Or just sat there?"

"Wait..." Piere suddenly came to a realization. He fished in his pocket for his phone. "What time is it?"

"It's the stroke of midnight. And now..." Her voice drawed off, as Piere turned on the screen of his phone. 11:59 PM... And then it ticked over. And the world had changed.

The woman put her phone back into her purse. "It's time to see the wound firsthand, Piere. It's 0 A.M."

by **Saltstead** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 6:33 pm

MANDATORY DISCLAIMER: This post does not necessarily represent the personal opinions of the author about any person, place, thing or idea. Nothing contained within is canonical. Read with caution.

The Beet

The Beet Sportsbox: The Official The Beet Preview of World Cup 90 Qualification (or at least half of it)
One hundred and sixty strange, mysterious never-before-seen nations will be knocking each other out like crazy in a qualification campaign unlike any other

Have you ever heard of these nations before? No? Neither have we. I mean, who awards a World Cup to a nation called “Banker Park”? And don’t even get us started on “Vanita”… Who comes up with these names?

Anyway, without further ado… Ladies, gentlemen and everyone who knows better, here is our definitive guide to World Cup qualification (or at least half of it) and who we expect to see qualify.

Path 1
Teams: Squid Roadie; Savoy Ana; Kohntail; Street Trinidad; Legalise; 龱丂闩尺讠ㄩ丂; Vientiane Z; The Finn Top Expire
Kohntail sounds an awful lot like this “Conehead” nation or something like that. Of course, we expect Legalise to swat everyone aside with mountains of paperwork that all needs to be filled in triplicate, leaving this Kohntail nation to go to the playoffs. Squid Roadie and Vientiane Z will be disappointed to miss out, but I’m sure they’ll rock on in the Cup of Harmony.

Path 2
Teams: Prime Cutaneous; Slovenia and Thailand; Old Hispania; The Choice; Equatoria; Murals; The Cordial Isles; Blemishzz
Slovenia and Thailand have the unfair advantage of fielding two nations at once. It’s absolutely insane that the World Cup Committee still allows this to happen. Prime Cutaneous are the only nation that can really hold a candle to them and we think they edge this double nation trouble out. Murals and The Choice will have the option to show off their artistic talents at the Cup of Harmony.

Path 3
Teams: Tutorial; Nerdtopia; Drakeland; Qaiden; Saint Elevator; Britoniland; The Karolin Hierarchy; Winnebago
All aboard! Saint Elevator to the top floor! There is no stopping this vertical transport sensation, who are going to wipe the floor with the rest of this group. Drakeland better sleep with one eye open. Winnebago and Nerdtopia don’t stand a chance. The rest of these losers? Toast. Hop in before you miss your chance. You’ll regret it if you don’t.

Path 4
Teams: Graentfjall; Trolleberg; IVVENCVS; Bill O Niche; Mountain Verse; De La Clava; Estandvipa or Estandpiva; Nagande
Screaming your name is a good way to be noticed, especially by referees, we hear. And in football, referees are your senpai. IVVENCVS have this group locked up. Nagande show up as second on our projection machine for some bizarre reason, beating out one-man team Bill O Niche and two-nation team Estandvipa or Estandpiva. We don’t know either. You’d hate to be one of the top two seeds in this group.

Path 5
Teams: Gala Nora; Criteria; Hoary Marcia; Tilapia; Astana; Sammy Mathsland; Melburgia; Vientianerium
Gala Nora sounds like a fashion show of some sort and we’re sure it’s fabulous. This is a nation that with qualify in S T Y L E. Criteria will put up a good fight in the end and will come close, but it won’t be enough. Tilapia and Hoary Marcia will be left in the dust. The rest of the group doesn’t even matter. Now we just want to know who will be the designers at this show.

Path 6
Teams: Chrome Attic; Euran Rushmori Territories; Saragossa; Akongoland; Alfred Qurija; Garden Fried; Transylvania; Gold Sarmatians
Presumably, Nafuna Akongo has decided to rename Nyowani Kitara after herself and a certain powerhouse has had a rebranding to be more like its colony. As these are the only two nations we can thus pretend to have heard of, we’re going to spit out a Hot Take™ and pick Akongoland as our winner, with the Euran Rushmori Territories as runner-up. Chrome Attic and Saragossa will presumably put up a good fight, but we have no way of knowing.

Also, Alfred Qurija sounds like a stand-up guy.

Path 7
Teams: Kesslek; America; Autograph; Monk Gyatso; ダムクニ; Kill Touch; Wrestlers; Jewels Land
Kesslek were our initial pick, but our prediction machine suggests that Monk Gyatso will just barely edge them out. It won’t be enough to qualify over this “America” monstrosity, but second place is a good showing for a single ascetic. Autograph also get just barely edged out by this monk, but that’s actually a good showing for them. We just want to know whose signature this is.

Path 8
Teams: Cassadaga; Five Silver; Reasueasn; Polyopia; Mortgage; Scheme Bass; Guano Castela; Exceptably Formal
All of our systems seem to glitch out with this “Reasueasn” team around. Thankfully, we got a usable result out of our prediction machine, showing this bug-waiting-to-happen as runners-up to Cassadaga. They seem to be the only team to survive the encounter with Reasueasn, as we cannot find any records of Scheme Bass, Five Silver or Guanocastela playing any matches. W̴̢̼̟͕̥̳̺͆͛͊̈́̍̅̅̆e̸͖̖̜͈̭̖̮̫̻̬͚͛́ ̶̦̙̜͇̗̩̭͈͔̞͂̂̂́̓͂̽͘͜ĵ̶̜̬̰͗̀̈͒́̾̋̔̐͠͝ú̸̳̗̗̹͍̫͓̖͆̓̽̿͂̒̀̿́͌̐͘͘͝ş̴͙̝̳͓̦̹͙̭̲͇̭̹̦̦͇̦́̈́̄̀̈́̿t̸̙̓̋̐̎͑̍̚͠͠ ̵̺̙̰̯̻͍͐̃̿̌̂̐̈̈́̆̓͛̚͜͝͠͝ĥ̶̡̨̗̠͖̻̬̫͚̤̺͋͋̍͛͗͑̕͜͝͠͠o̵̢̥̱͈͓̞͎̰͙̣̰̣̞̝̳̜̽͗͑̆̂͋͂͜p̴̣̒̓͑͌͌̀̽͐̈́̓̀̓e̵̢̡͍̩̝̯͒̑̽̃͘͜ ̷̡͍̠̜͚̹͙̼̠͉̲͎͂̄t̸̡̛̻̖͙̱̗̼̞͍͗̔̊̒̊̏͊́͊͆͗̚̕͝͝͝ͅh̷̲̹̤̗͎̯͓͙͍̠̯̲͍̉̏̓̍̀͂̉́̽̌͑ì̶̭͖̘̣̻̀͑̈́̑͒͝s̴̨̧̡̤̙͈̠̙̟̺̜̤̬͇̎̍́̊͗̊̋̎͘̚͝͠ ̷̢̡͇̗̫̙̯̩̙̣̣̬̯̎̎͊̋̆͛̍͜p̶̨̢̧̩͕̳̱̠̻̗̤̞͕̎̍̐̇͜͜͠ͅr̴̞̩̳͕̱̤̥̥̣̝̗̥̙͙̖͌́̔̓̂̂͝e̶̟̹̯̪̟̓̂̽̐͌͐̒̀̃̓͛̎̔̕͘̚v̴̯̺̯͌̀̈̀̂̔̐̕̚ǐ̴̛̮̼̊̓͊̃̑͑͜͝e̵̳̥̿̽̈́̇̍̇͛̈́͂̎̈́̈̈́̅̿̚ͅw̶̛͕̣̳͔̜̥̘̟͚̬̺̘̼̌̃̑̃̓͜ ̷̡̨̻̭̗̝͈̯̬͇̜͚͆̌͐̓̔͘͜m̸̢̖͎̫̘̩͔̰̯̉̒̉͝ͅa̴̝͎̥̻̺̪̽̔̇̈́͋͌͊́̑́͘k̷͙̺̝̣̓͆́̈́͌̈́̈́͂̒͂̅̑e̵̛̫͇͍̺̦͖̙̻͐̎̇̄͋̇͒͋̀̅͗̓̚s̴̡̗̖̪͙̫̞̯̍̀̄͘ͅ ̵̧̛̟̭͖̘͐̆͛̚̕ḭ̶̢̛͍̻̂̿́̆̾͗̋̇̃͋̀́̀̓͒̅ͅt̸̛̯͚͕͚̹̖̣̤̖̞̯̅͂̍͗̈́̀͒̃̎̑́̍͛͠͝ͅ.̶̱̥̝͇͍̳̖̏͐͌̄̓͜

Path 9
Teams: Negara; Interdependent Athletics from Ontario; Bar Union; Induce; Barbarians and Notes; Mitcham; LEGOLAND; Old Zhengguo
We were suspicious of taking a bunch of runners, jumpers, throwers and walkers from (we presume) Eshialand, putting them together and calling them a team, but the Interdependent Athletics from Ontario are also apparently good at football, beating out Induce to qualify. We’re not sure why this Negara nation is a top seed, what with Bar Union and Old Zhengguo coming closer to qualifying according to our simulations.

Path 10
Teams: Marceline; Jerusalem; Dhar Mann; Bolivia and the Saucepan Isles; Hallikshire, North Handoria, Otksarin and South Jeolerina; Other Islands; Shoulders; Kazakhstan
Other Islands standly proud up for all the unrepresented islands in the multiverse, taking down giants like Dhar Mann, Jerusalem and Bolivia and the Saucepan Isles to qualify. In fact, it’s very island-heavy at the top, as the latter take second place. What’s disappointing, though, is that despite having four nations at their disposal, Hallikshire, North Handoria, Otksarin and South Jeolerina don’t even finish in the top half. Maybe if Handoria and Jeolrina piece themselves together like Hallikshire and Otksarin did, they will actually stand a chance.

And there you have it, everyone. The Beet has successfully predicted half of World Cup qualification. Any errors in this prediction are not actually errors, but glitches in reality. We’re not going to do a second half, but some blog out there can pick up where we left off. Good luck. o/ —TB

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by **Britonisea** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 6:46 pm

Brityunik Vefecosoin Cairkovoin - NEWS
http://www.bvc.com/news

16th January 2022
Live from Doportedas, Britonisea

DOPORTEDAS WELCOMES WORLD CUP FANS AS CITY GEARS UP TO HOST MORE EVENTS IN 2022

Doportedas New Stadium: The event hosted World Cup 89 qualifiers matches too...

Doportedas, the capital of Britonisea and home to over 6 million, will be at the centre of attention this year as the city has been chosen to host multiple events this year so far. Doportedas has also been rumoured to host or bid to host more events, including a sporting event...

By James Baxter

Doportedas has always been at loggerheads with Telm City when it comes to hosting Britonisea's major events. With other cities such as Quickenden, Junterapten and Kyvivre (the major cities in the five largest 'Authorities' of Britonisea) also snatching some of the events that Doportedas has been eyeing, the news that the capital city is expected to be chosen over other cities in 2022 to host major events that could come to the country will be very welcome to the Authority's officials. Reportedly, it infuriated the Dopor Authority that Quickenden was chosen to host the Ashcroft Bank Britonish Grand Prix at the inaugural NS Athletics Tour, when Doportedas - they say - has the best facilities to accommodate an event of that scale. Nevertheless, Quickenden still hosted a great event, which only helped the case to decentralise the events that happen in Britonisea.

This year, Doportedas starts off by hosting the first home games of the World Cup 90 qualifications against the team ranked 105th in the world, Saint Eleanor with Britonisea hoping to make an impact against this team and start their campaign positively. They're hoping that the 56,000 people who will be present for the match will be enough to add to their goal of no more than 7 losses in the group stage. This target has been set after Britonisea reduced its loss percentage in World Cup 83 from 66% to 55% at the 89th World Cup, including a draw against eventual World Cup-winning team Ko-Oren in the group stage, who while they probably didn't send their more star-studded team to Britonisea represented a major feat for the Britons. Doportedas and the rest of the country are more than aware of Britonisea's target, with the country hoping that similar to the Olympic Games delegation - which saw Britonisea alone place 9th in the medal table - the Britonish boys can surpass expectations set by the Sports Board. Doportedas has the honour of hosting of sending the Britons off and there are high hopes against Saint Eleanor.

But what else can Doportedas look forward to this year? Doportedas aren't yet done hosting World Cup 90 qualification matches, with the city also hosting the match against Qasden - a last-minute change after four nations in the group were ranked higher than 71st (Initially, nations in the top 70 would play in Telm City, but Qasden will play in Doportedas instead to spread the matches out more evenly), but this won't be for quite some time. Keeping on the topic of sports, Doportedas has the highly anticipated The Britonish Open grass tennis tournament, which saw 96 singles players and 104 doubles players split into 52 pairs compete to become the Season 7 winner of the event. The Britonish Open is expected to go ahead again with a slight difference this time - The Barlinedon Championships will be held alongside this Tier 1 tournament, a Tier 2 competition to keep the action alive in Doportedas' Barlinedon complex at the same level as a Grand Slam. Doportedas may also feature in a bid attempt of the NSTT World Tour Final after Luton & Sports City failed to put in a bid for Season 7. The event was instead held in Ceni. There has been a strong suggestion that Britonisea may opt to bid for an upcoming IAC after the nation's hosting of the Football Champions League last year, with Doportedas being at the forefront there. The Sports Board has suggested willingness to resubmit Britonisea to host a leg of the NS Athletics Tour if that were to return, and Doportedas is expected to make a bid to steal the Britonish Grand Prix away from Quickenden. The Sports Board are not elaborating on any further plans and with Britonisea's lack of participation in other sporting events, it is unlikely that there will be many other opportunities than the ones that have already been suggested.

Away from sports, Doportedas can look forward to hosting the finals of Britonisea's most popular television show, Vha Mehlodhivestoile, which tours around the country year on year. While Doportedas has hosted a leg of the event before, it hasn't ever hosted the final and so for Doportedasians, this was the moment they've been waiting for. While the arena for hosting hasn't yet been announced, it is expected that more than 30,000 fans will attend the event live with it being broadcast to over 24 nations across the multiverse, making it one of the largest exported domestic music competitions. On the topic of music, with the centennial edition of the WorldVision Song Contest fast approaching, it has been rumoured that the national broadcaster is working on a "monumental" bid to bring the contest back to Britonisea in what would be 19 editions, assuming the nation doesn't host in the next three editions. Britonisea has seven wins and is the second most successful nation at the competition, which would make it a good choice to host such an occasion. With Doportedas having lost two bids in the past to host, the city might be chosen as the Britonish candidate in the hope to give Doportedasians the chance to experience the buzz of the contest, and the multiverse a great location for the anniversary. BITC has not yet confirmed the bid would be going ahead, however. With it being award season, the IBA Television Awards is expected to take place in Doportedas, with more information on that coming.

Nevertheless, all eyes will be on Doportedas this year and as mentioned earlier, this all begins with the match against Saint Eleanor. Can Britonisea start off better than it did at the 89th World Cup qualifications or will the country once again be trailing behind with no hope for a good result? We will find out tonight...

You can watch the match live on BVC Two.

by **Aut-Ves-Nat** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 7:09 pm

Model 2 Automations
Dr. Kazimir Polowski TOP SECRET

After months of research into the viability of a new form a Automations for the Autonomous Vessel Nation. Model 2 Automations, or M2s have already been tested in multiple ways, with conclusions made from the testing showing promise.

The CAFA Cup trophy was stolen from the Grand Admiral of Autonomous Vessel Nation by unknown assailants. Information of this theft has not been revealed to the general public at large as of this documents' last update. The tourist's portion of AVN deck space complains a replica trophy branded as the genuine article. In response to this robbery, Grand Admiral J.J.M has demanded new robotic workers for the hive mind. Regular models will continue to perform most tasks for the collective, but M2s will be assigned to matters of vessel security, and military applications. If successful, the models may also sell on the black and white markets for violent applications.

Each and every area of these machines is to be upgraded over the traditional automations. Dr. Polowski was granted access to design documents unseen by human eyes. Each document was carefully studied for flaws by Dr. Polowski and a team of engineering specialists, all automations themselves. Chipset intelligence and physical trials for the bodies have concluded for the current M2 prototype set. While not every test has had a flawless conclusion, marked progress has been made in both areas. Combat testing has not been attempted due to a lack of resources for such operations. Plans are to use M2s to collected important resources from a vulnerable nation.

The latest developments into AVN technology have shown a marked improvement in performing intellectual tasks. Automations of traditional construction were unlinked from the collective robotic brain and matched in games of chess against prototype M2 Automation chipsets and "Thinking Software." yet to be linked with the hive. M2s lost all games until the generation 4,000 of machine learning produced a victory. By generation 10,000 the sides were equal. By generation 12,000 and on M2 automations were unbeaten. Out of the one hundred subject tested, five machines sing M2 software shut down due to hardware or software error.

Physically, M2s must continue to be tested. An an athletic exercise test similar to football has been used thus far. Fifty seven of one hundred initial prototype Automations were victims of sports casualties, but each revision has performed better. M2s of all descriptions are faster and stronger than basic automations. The final prototype group was M2-Theta. Teams M2-Theta machines won all games, and only two machines was destroyed by gameplay. Two other defective models failed to even play via construction error. J.J.M has been unhappy with the results. Automations are not the best in the world at football, having lost in the quarter finals of CAFA Cup 2. If the best players of the past and present were available, a true test of M2 Automations could be possible.

Day 918, 9:30
I have made an enormous discovery!

An AVN worker left behind a keycard with my food delivery. I was able to take the card into possession. I lack some security clearances in the Autonomous Vessel Nation. Perhaps my ability to discover secret for my research has been unshackled. My ability to bypass security has already become powerful, due to my status. A lack of security beyond the initial layer is still a major weakness for J.J.M. I shall tonight investigate where this keycard will take me.

21:45
My new keycard allowed me access Level-Sub-2, an underwater section of the ship. Sneaking around the area was difficult. I observe the behaviors of the guards in this section, and found they must not be linked to the hive mind. Also in my travels I found documents which were pertinent to my research. Inconspicuously these manuscripts hav been photocopied alongside other works which I have officially borrowed from the library. These documents were written in an older script, and had to be slowly translated.

A heavily redacted history of the Automations themselves was what I first studied. I was inspired by the title being easy to translate. The creators of these beings are called "Dimenalizers" in these documents. This name is consistent with the limited history I have been officially taught. New information indicates that the current group of prototypes. Astonishingly, these Dimenalizers are of an extra-terrestrial origin. The dates and times of these documents were astonishing. The old document claimed production of a single automation once took 1,000 years. Since these years are unearthly, I have no clue how long this really was. First generation machines were simple task based robots. Second and third generation models were more capable of these simple tasks, and acted like computers. Fourth generation models seem to only exist in "frequency waves," which is perhaps to say "digital." Fifth Generation models had thinking close to their creators.

Current Automations are in fact the sixth generation of such machines, the most lifelike, complex, and free thinking models made. The Automations on this ship are meant for "recreational" and "order creating" applications. However, some machines and their collective brain attempted to destroy the Dimenalizers. All sixth generation prototypes were to be destroyed, but some with access to a space fearing vessel went away from the Dimenalizer homeland, to a place as far away as possible. The decision made by the computer brain assigned to these machine to run away was risky. The world they found lacked the resources to keep the machines thriving. If they cannot find a suitable and sustainable sourced of the "Theas" energy source, the AVN will cease to exist. Current documents suggest it is possible to extract this material from underwater, but these old documents were written before this knowledge was found.

The document, even with my best translating efforts, became indecipherable after a point. I will have to move into the archives deeper to find more information. Perhaps a translation key is recoverable. I will have to be careful, as I was warned for exploring once before.

by **Audioslavia** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 7:10 pm

Charlie couldn’t grow a moustache, but lord knows he was trying. He'd been growing out all the blondish wisps as long as they could and, this morning, dyed them a similar mousy brown to what was left of his hair, but as he walked proudly into work this morning though all he'd heard for his shift so far was jokes from his colleagues asking if he’d been rubbing his face on a cat. Screw them. They were all overweight and it’s not as if *their* moustaches were even that good either.

Charlie tried to shuffle another roll of his own belly into his trousers and straightened his tie. He almost didn’t notice the foreigner in the suit in front of him. Without looking up, he uttered the line.

“Passport”

The man in the suit handed him forty seven passports. This wasn’t normal. Charlie peered up at the group before him. Suits. Some really quite lean looking guys in suits with flecks of blue and green here and there. With them were what looked like four cops - two in the blue get-up they wore in some places back in AO, and two in ‘plainclothes’, which in Charlie’s experience was an adjective that cops took too literally. They always looked like they’d been dressed by their gran.

One by one, he beckoned a man forward, made sure they had the same face as the picture, and asked their reason for being in Audioslavia. Most said a variation of “football" or "Hapilopper football” or "Hapilopper National Team", though a couple tried to be more original. “We’re here to dismantle the Kirola Arena” said one. "We're here to collect three points" said another. One guy had gone above and beyond and had said the phrase “My name is Jerold Dickman”, which caused the process to screech to a halt as Charlie commenced a thorough examination of the man’s passport. One of the guys, called Nathan Ellis, had asked if Charlie was going to watch the game. Charlie had never particularly taken to football, instead preferring to alphabetise his collection of Jolt-era Bazalonian tank magazines with his free time, but nominally called himself an 1830 Cathair fan when they were doing well, which used to be ‘always’ but was now something people just didn’t mention. “You still got that Steve Erickson playing for you?” Charlie had asked. “He’s about 40 now” had come the response. “Oh”, Charlie had said, before waving him through.

“Special Agent Sherman” said one of the plainclothes cops, flashing a badge.
“You got a name?”
“Sherman. Special Agent. Special Agent Sherman” said Special Agent Sherman.
“A first name” said Charlie. “And a passport. I kind of need that too”
Special Agent Sherman stared intently at Charlie, who sniffed. With a sigh, he fished his passport from his pocket and put it on the counter.
“Thanks” said Charlie, taking the passport. “Thanks… Lilian. Lilian Sherman”
“Yeah it’s a guy’s name too”
“I’m sure it is. Still, though, there’s a tank named after you”
“There’s no tank named Lilian”
“No I mean… wait what is that”
Charlie peered perplexedly past the Hapiloppian’s beige shirt at the large black vehicle behind him.
“SCUM unit” said Sherman, without looking. “For the team’s protection. S’why we’re here” he said, nodding at the three men behind him.
Charlie blinked and stared at what looked to be more than a hundred grand's worth of armoured car.
“How were you planning on getting to your hotel? Through Nyowani Kitara?”
“Tensions between our two communities have been heightened due to the ongoing political ramifications of the Treason of Foxchester whereby….”
“Oh right” said Charlie, puffing out his cheeks. “Has… has there been an incident”
“Not as such but..”
“I’m pretty sure I’d have been told if there’d been an incident” said Charlie, now a bit flustered. He checked the ‘days since last incident with AO’ chart on his desk, which was still on a big four digit number.
“Never be too careful” said the cop. “Tensions between our two communities have been heightened due to the…”
“You’re going to be playing the game at the Arena Kirola, right? It’s in Grand Forum, the banking district. It’s a Saturday. You get to the game a few hours before kick-off, you won’t see anyone. It’s like a ghost town, that part of the city. Your big van thing is mainly going to be under attack from pigeons who think it’s a big square looking pie”
“…what do pies look like in Audioslavia?” Asked the cop.
“Large, black, angular. Wheels”
“Weird”
Charlie narrowed his eyes.
“What”
“That’s not what a pie should look like” said Sherman, shrugging. Charlie took out his stamp and banged it on the cop’s passport as hard as he could. “NEXT” he shouted, sulking in the general direction of one of the guys behind Sherman.

As Sherman made his way to the other side of the barriers, where the team were waiting aboard the bus, he caught a glimpse of Nathan Ellis, who was looking at him concernedly.
“What was that about? We got a problem?”
“He got angry because I said Audioslavian pies sounded weird” shrugged the cop.
“Huh” said Nathan, scrutinising the back of Charlie’s head. The front of Charlie’s head was looking up at another cop, this one in uniform.
“The name’s Bradley” said the cop. “Coppers Without Borders”
“What” said Charlie
“Nothing, it’s a joke. I’m a cop who’s travelling so… y’know…. Cops without Borders. Flying Pigs. Foreign Exchange Fuzz”
“Foreign exchange what”
“Fuzz” said Bradley
Charlie slammed his stamp down on Bradley’s passport and harrumphed, folding his arms.
“FOR THE LAST TIME, IT’S A MOUSTACHE”

by **Turori** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 7:20 pm

Stelladome, Fulpog, Zwangzug :: After the heartbreaking defeat that the Turori National Team suffered on penalty kicks to eventual World Cup Champion Free Republics during the World Cup 85 Finals, optimism was high for another deep run in World Cup 86. Despite an opening matchday defeat to the Commonwealth of Baker Park, the Turori National Team would click off consecutive victories over Audioslavia and Kandorith to breeze through to the knockout rounds. Unfortunately, Turori were drawn into a difficult Round of 16 pairing against Nephara, a former World Cup Champion nation whose fans had also highlighted World Cup 86 as their chance to get back on top of the multiverse. The Eels would suffer a hard fought defeat with the Comorants emerging victorious by a 2-1 scoreline. Nephara would go on to the World Cup Final where they would be defeated by Banija - though the disappointment would only last one cycle as Nephara would rebound to win World Cup 87 for their second World Cup Title.

Turori would finally get their own chance at the title in World Cup 88 - but the alternating titles for Nephara and Turori meant that the two long time Eagle's Cup Foes would not contest any matches in Eagle's Cup 9, 10 or 11. On opposite sides of the draw for Eagle's Cup 12 once more there would be no opportunity for the two sides to meet unless it was for a medal. After eight matches of competition, Turori and Nephara had each earned a trophy in their own mini competitions. Nephara earning the Cocoa-bo Challenge Trophy and Turori the Cup of Champions. There was just one match left to play. The Eagle's Cup Final.

For the first time ever, the Eagle's Cup Final was being played in Zwangzug. It would be the first Eagle's Cup final contested outside Atlantian Oceania in the modern era. Nephara, the defending Bronze Medalists, were looking to claim the Eagle's Cup Title for the first time since Eagle's Cup V - the first edition of the modern era. Turori were about to step on the pitch as just the third team to contest consecutive Eagle's Cup Finals. Of the two that had odone it previously: Kingsford and Banija, neither had won their second attempt. It was Kingsford who lost to Turori during Eagle's Cup III on Penalty Kicks while Banija lost in extra time to Valanora during Eagle's Cup IX.

The Turori National Team and head coach Tarek Edgeli had spent much of the Cup of Champions mixing in uncapped youth, second string and fringe players to the lineup but when the team was announced for the Eagle's Cup XII Gold Medal Match there would be no such concessions. A full Strength Turori National Citizen Squad came out of the tunnel with Eura based netminder Derizi Amatopa back in goal after having sat on the sideline for three consecutive matches with an apparent hand injury. Veteran striker and all time leading scorer Meldi'ita Mungwaii was also back in action after having sat out the Cup of Champions Final and was re-united with former teammate Nua'oma Aikiki in a familiar crowd in front of the fans that watched the famous Turorian World Cup Winner through the latter portion of their Domestic Career at Arlington City FC in Zwangzug.

The Final match got kicked off to pomp and cirumstance with the return of major competition final to Zwangzug. Edgeli's Eels came out with high energy looking to attack early and had the first chance of the match when Mungwaii fired a tight angle shot under Tanith Arrowsmith but clanked off the post and into the mix to be cleared out by the Comorants Ophelia Schrader. It was a collective sigh from the Turorian fans in attendance who feared their chance to take the lead and control of the match had passed them by.

Luckily for Edgeli's Eels however they would be more fortunate on their second goal scoring opportunity of the game in the 16th minute when their other attacker, Nua'oma Aikiki, spun and fired a quick shot from the top of the box that deflected slightly off the leg of a Nepharim defender catching Arrowsmith moving the wrong way and unable to stop the shot finding its way into the back of the net. Incredibly it would be the 8th goal of the competition thus far for Aikiki who set a new Turorian record for goals in a single Eagle's Cup competition with the tally while crossing the 60 goals mark all time.

Turori would hold on to the lead through half time and with the match playing out exactly as the coaching staff had hoped it would to that point, Tarek Edgeli would make no changes in sending the Eels back out for the second half. Playing together as a unit for the first time all tournament, Turori's first choice squad worked cohesively and contained each threat Nephara posed in a second half of play that was probably less entertaining than the home fans had hoped out of a Championship Final. Edgeli made just one change in the second half, introducing Kinabo Telioa for Kiidallen Aeroluzzi in the 65th minute as the team would hold down the fort until the final whistle and become the first ever back-to-back champions of the Eagle's Cup.

Turori 1 - 0 Nephara
Goals: :: 16' Nua'oma Aikiki
Team: Derizi Amatopa, Planio’o Nrujsa, Lulu Pumaziiri, Bvalis Amaanara, Retiso Buran, Daliora Toru'u, Cuoabaza Orani’aoa, Lati'ala Giaoka, Kiidallen Aeroluzzi (Kinabo Telioa 65'), Nua'oma Aikiki, Meldi'ita Mungwaii

Turori Schedule and Tactical Information for World Cup 90 Qualifying

Eels Park, Eelandii, Turori :: The Football Association of Turori (FAT) have announced the following schedule for their World Cup 89 Qualifying Campaign:

MD 3 -v- Winnebogan
Eels Park, Eelandii, Turori :: Capacity: 68000
Primary Tenant: Turori National Team

MD 5 -v- The Karodin Tetrarchy
Almintora National Stadium, Almintora, Turori :: Capacity: 79000
Primary Tenant: FC Almintora

MD 7 -v- Drawkland
Kionao Minor Field, Kionao, Turori :: Capacity: 107000
Primary Tenant: Kionao Locals

MD 8 -v- Qasden
Iobabao Legendary Park, Mliona, Turori :: Capacity: 90500
Primary Tenant: Mliona-Lpaka

MD 9 -v- Geektopia
Cednia Beach Center, Cednia, Turori :: Capacity: 103000
Primary Tenant: Cednia Beach AFC

MD 11 -v- Saint Eleanor
Eels Park, Eelandii, Turori :: Capacity: 68000
Primary Tenant: Turori National Team

MD 13 -v- Britonisea
Eels Park, Eelandii, Turori :: Capacity: 68000
Primary Tenant: Turori National Team

Under the Leadership of former Turori National Team defender Tarek Edgeli, the Eels have continued to employ System Karela, a less extreme variant of the Rejistanian System Karela. A Full list of the Original Rejistanian Tactical Systems and a description of the modern System Turori is included below:

System Karela

All-Out-Defense

System Jesejil

System Imdila

System Hisisim/Iknel

System Hangila

System Takil

All-Out-Attack

The Modern Turorian System

System Turori

by **South Newlandia** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 7:39 pm

“You see”, said Robert Wolverine to his assistant, Todd Ingolffson, “football is not so different from chess.” Wolverine, playing the white pieces, pushes his knight into Ingolffson’s territory. “What do you mean by that?” “Well, you know,” Wolverine began to explain as his assistant coach attacked his bishop with a pawn, “it’s all about strategy, and making the most out of the pieces you have. Let’s say, for example,” – Wolverine retreated his bishop – “the games against Zwangzug. The battles with the team in black and white. The battles may only be matchdays 7 and 14, but it remains important to think about them now.”

“I guess so.” Ingolffson replied, while attacking the same bishop again. “They are, what, top-50 in the SRS Hall of Fame rankings? And yet, we are ranked higher right now, and even though they’re the better football team for sure, we might be able to beat them if we out-strategize them.” Wolverine made a threat on his opponent’s queen, winning a tempo. “Basically, we can think of it like chess. Trischuk is our king. He’s the captain and most important player, with him, the entire team stands and falls.” “As is typical for goalkeepers,” Ingolffson replied, placing his queen two squares back. “Exactly. Likewise, Troy-Vee is their king. Bit of a loner, maybe the chemistry isn’t there with his teammates. Maybe something there. Who knows?” Wolverine retreated his bishop once again, attacking a loose pawn in the process. “Now you’re overthinking it.” Ingolffson defended the pawn with his rook. “Maybe. Irving is our queen. Capable of doing lots of damage, but in the wrong circumstances, she’s, or, in this case, he is, merely mortal. Likewise, their queen is Axelrod-Conway. I don’t think I even need to explain that one.”

“You’re right,” answered Ingolffson, “Axelrod-Conway is a queen. Everyone can see that.” Wolverine, having clearly missed the sarcasm entirely, moves his king over to the corner. “The rooks, of course, are the crucial defenders. Roy and Anderson for us, obviously, and I guess you could call Barker a rook too.” “Do you want me to call someone? Are you alright? Do you need a doctor?” “you know me, Todd, I’ve never felt better. Their rooks are Crain, Vizirani, probably also Sibal. I’m a big fan of Crain especially. It’s also your move.” “Yeah, yeah,” Ingolffson hastily pushes a pawn. “Alright, I’ll listen. I’m going to guess the bishops are next?” “The bishops are next, and those are obviously the long-ranged pieces. Green, of course, for us, and also Young and Levy; most likely Gannett, I suppose, Sokhi and Haugen? Long range, great stamina, they all stay useful for 90 minutes. You need players that know what they’re doing.” Wolverine followed this up by pushing his pawn two squares.

“You really are sure you’re okay?” “Yes, stop that.” “Fine,” Ingolffson responded, while simultaneously attacking the pawn with his bishop. “I’m ready, tell me what the knights represent.”
“They’re the young, unproven, but ever-more motivated young players, obviously. For us, that’s the new players, Rios, Stuart, and Gomez. They can be the deciding factor, but they don’t have the nerves that others do.” Wolverine pushes his pawn another square. “For them, it’s Waugh, Puyo-Sachar, and Ginoud-Sachs. Not quite as new players, but they bring a similar energy.” Ingolffson answered nothing, only retreating his bishop. “And, now, guess who the pawns are.” “Us?” Ingolffson made a tired guess, “Of course not, the pawns are the substitutes. Often overlooked, but no team can win without them. We’re the players behind the pieces.” Wolverine pushed his pawn another square. “Sometimes, you can find the littlest thing, the smallest trick, and it can be enough to win. That's why it's important to think beforehand. This is checkmate in five. Well played.”

by **Huayramarca** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 7:40 pm

OOC: All concepts and thoughts expressed here does not represent my actual political views nor are intended to target any kind of social collective expressions.

News of The Day – Huayramarca and The Multiverse

Written by: Mirma Choque
13/01/1985 – 20:40 P.M.

Hello and welcome to today’s compilation of news across Huayramarca and the Multiverse. This day has been different compared to the almost monotone rhythm of news in Huayramarca during the last six months, and that news intensity will not show signs of relaxation for the upcoming months, as we get closer and closer to the General Elections of Huayramarca, which will be held on April 2nd. The first movements were held today on morning, as the Supreme Elections Committee raised the green flag for the inscription of candidates for said election.

On an event held at a hotel in the outskirts of the Metropolitan District, Juliana Márquez, head of the Committee, gave a speech before the opening of this process.

“Today marks the beginning of a potentially historic event for Huayramarca, an event that will be pivotal for the future of our nation. Huayramarcans will have to face, in less than four months, one of their most transcendent decisions in the last decades, as the consolidation of a sustainable democratic system is at stake. Candidates have to be mature enough to face this challenge, being able to handle properly the decision that the population will have to take. Do never forget who’s on the reigns of this horse, it’s the people who wants to forge their destiny, those who desire to have a place that provides satisfaction and delivers compromise to create a favourable environment for personal development.”

After the speech, there was a period of time given to the media in order to ask some questions that might be important for the people to know about the process, as there’s a period of transformation for the system overall. Here’s a transcript of what Juliana Márquez said today on said press conference:

Trome: How many representatives will compose the new National Congress?
JM: Two-hundred representatives. They will be elected from the same number of constituencies, being 198 for Continental and Archipelagic Huayramarca, one seat for Huayramarcans on Anaia and neighbouring regions such as Atlantian Oceania, Esportiva, Rushmore and another seat for Huayramarcans spread out on the Multiverse.

El Mercurio: There’s any change in the criteria for nomination of candidates to the Legislative Organ?
JM: No, it will continue to be the same criteria as usual: Huayramarcan born or son from Huayramarcans, from 25 years of age or older, preferably secular and with demonstrable capacity of literacy of Spanish and/or one of the official indigenous languages throughout the Republic.

El Sol: Has been considered the establishment of a hard top for expenditure throughout the campaign?
JM: Yes. One million Inti ($333,000) for presidential candidates and a quarter-million Inti ($83,333) for those campaigning for a seat on the National Congress.

Anaia TV: Now that you’ve mentioned presidency, there’s a question for it: There’s allowance for candidates born outside Huayramarca to be nominated for the presidential campaign?
JM: If you’re born from Huayramarcan parents, then there’s no restriction about it. If it’s a foreigner living on Huayramarca, there’s no possibility for it. As an example, if a Krytenian that has 20 years living here, be it uninterrupted or investing significant sums of it, they won’t be allowed to take part of the election. Every candidate MUST be a Huayramarcan or born from Huayramarcan parents (at least one parent).

With the key questions duly answered by Juliana Márquez, the so expected green flag arrived by setting up a software that will allow the candidates to inscribe to the election process. If somebody is nominated, that person must come from an internal election process from a political party or be an independent candidate with written support, through signatures, from at least 300,000 people that endorse their plans to get into presidency. After all, criteria such as a clear criminal record, no ongoing legal processes and also proof of not being a member of the army or any religious order during the last five years.

The Huayramarcan internal elections are held, usually, the first weekend after the campaign period is opened in order to “keep the persons inertia going properly” through the period and boost their possibilities to get elected as a candidate, no matter if its for the Congress or the Presidency. In regards of the political parties that, according to the scheduling of their internal elections, will have a say during the next elections we have the following list:

Ñucanchi Ñan (Our Path): The ruling party will seek to extend their period in power, but now with Augusto Buendía as a president. The former mayor of the border outpost of Tulcán will have to step aside, as the Constitution of Huayramarca from 1980 impedes him to seek reelection as a president; instead, he will be the vice-president of the formula lead by Martha Mamani, an influential figure of the 1980 revolution and, considered by many, as the spark that set Sopocachi “on fire”.

Mamani is a 48-year-old Sopocachi native, her stance leans a bit more to the left if we compare it to the stance of Augusto Buendía. Mamani has mentioned before that she is against mineral mining, leaving some open ground to promote a bill that may ban this activity unless the mineral is considered as “Strategical” and the reserves aren’t located in indigenous holy shrines such as Mount Illimani and the corporations in charge of the operations are able to present a “sustainable extractive project”.

In terms of Anaian integration, Ñucanchi Ñan aims hard in order to promote a tighter bond between Huayramarca and the rest of Anaian nations, this can be reflected as she and Augusto Buendía will promote to the newly elected Legislative Assembly a bill to inscribe Huayramarca into the Anaian Open Reciprocal Travel Area (known as AORTA). The main premises behind this bill project are: promotion of Huayramarca as a top-quality destination for tourists across Anaia, economical diversification and opportunity to open up the nation to foreign investments.

Some other priorities from Mamani and Buendía features: stimuli for poor communities through investment in agricultural technology, scholarships for kids and young people and infrastructure construction such as roads, electricity centrals and water services.

The ruling party hasn’t received another nomination for the process, so, rather than being an internal election, it will be a process that will serve as a “popularity thermometer” to the formula that they will send into contention for this process.

Conservative Party: Led by the multimillionaire rubber and oil tycoon Ricardo Flores, the party has declared itself in a “state of war” against “the wicked progressivism of ‘Ñucanchi Mana Allin Ñan’ (Our Wrongful Path)” Flores considers that Huayramarca has to explode their resource potential in order to avoid the country fall into the fangs of the “resource course”, aiming to liberalise the permissions for extraction projects in the fields of oil and minerals. The main idea of permitting those activities is to allow more income for Huayramarca.

The project of extraction of minerals is part of a bigger plan to “make Huayramarca great again”, as this would help to build pension funds to solve the needs of the Huayramarcan population, then this will allow to the Huayramarcan National Investment Authority, a proposed entity that will be responsible to manage the Pension Fund, invest those resources across the Multiverse in projects with ROI (Returun Over Investment) higher than the Consumers Price Index of Huayramarca and the host nation.

The proposed project will help Huayramarca quadruple its Gross Domestic Product (GDP) in less than 10 years. It’s remarkable to add that Flores us a staunch anti-Anaian, this has caused him to be against the formation of any kind of Anaian entities and the participation of Huayramarca in the regional community.

The main contender of Flores in the Conservatives is William Mamani-Hastings, a Québécois son of Huayramarcans that was educated at the top schools and universities of Québec & Shingoryeo. To the contrary of Flores, Mamani-Hastings is a pro-Anaian figure, as he considers that opening up to the regional institutions and life will provide Huayramarca “a once in a lifetime chance to prosper”. His economical agenda considers boosting up the tourism industry by signing Huayramarca to AORTA “the very same day I take office” and creating funding lines to boost the infrastructure of said industry and infrastructure required to “keep tourism healthy”.

Socially speaking, Mamani-Hastings is decided to impulse a bill against abortion (currently legal on Huayramarca) and lock any attempt for “LGBTQ-friendly” bills, as he wants to keep Huayramarca a nation free of “social alienation”. In terms of mining, Mamani-Hastings is open up to make mining laws friendlier, only impeding any extraction activities in holy shrines or indigenous chartered lands, creation of a Pension Fund that will be “invested smartly” in order to provide Huayramarca a “lifeline” to achieve a “developed nation status in 20 years.”

Communist Party: A representative of social collectives surged at the San Carlos Islands will make its first appearance in the elections, as a party that will seek for support from other collectives in the “forgotten zones of Huayramarca”. The contest in this party will feature David Villacís, a 55-year-old fish farmer and Cristina Perlaza, a 45-year-old social assistant on Puerto Odriozola. This party shall be taken in consideration as it might represent the extreme left wing that doesn’t feels represented by Ñucanchi Ñan and another social groups that might be considered as ignored or forgotten by the traditional politic parties of Huayramarca, as both candidates will seek to appeal the undecided youth.

David Villacís main aim is to transform Huayramarca from a Republic to a “Collectivist State”, where decisions must be taken at a local level to satisfy the needs of people, following certain guidelines coming from a Central Planning Committee. According to him, Huayramarca is a “mess, a disorder and chaos that needs some thoughtful minds to restore it to a path of common good and satisfaction”. To achieve this, he considers that all means of production shall be public, promoting the use of the General Systems of Theory in order to achieve order and objectives set to benefit the people. In terms of Anaian Integration Villacís considers that Huayramarca “must open its arms and promote solidarity between peoples and nations to fulfill the greater goal of communism.

Cristina Perlaza follows a hardcore line of communism that promotes direct expropriation of private goods and establishing local production committees (Kolkhoz) to promote development in local communities in “fair and equal shares”. Said committees will be bolstered by a Department of Agriculture that will focus on researching and collaboration with other countries such as the Commonwealth of the Plough Islands, which according to Perlaza “shares our ideals and goals for a better society”. In regards of mining, Perlaza will allow “state-controlled mining” as her conception of state, under communist ideals, will “always strive to deliver the best to the proletariat”

As Villacís does, Perlaza will follow the guidelines of the party with Anaian matters as she considers that “friendship between peoples is a must if we plan to provide relief to a hurt proletariat that wishes a brighter and red future.” As a party attempt to avoid fear rising, they have compromised to keep the electoral system “untouched” and their reforms will be focused towards organisation and performance improvement of the current system.

Christian Values Alliance: Despite the name could go against the secular values that the 1980 Constitution enshrines, the promotion of values, per se, doesn’t goes against the Constitution, it goes against if a party promotes a person that belongs to a religious. In this party, which main core is to appeal the Christian vote, especially among voters living in the Huayramarcan “Bible belt” (composed of Departments located on Coastal and Yungas regions), the party emphasises on banning abortion and LGBTQ right of marriage, also has stance in some Anaian and mining issues that may vary from candidate to candidate.

Salma Machado, a Guayaquil native, leads the preferences in the internal elections of the Alliance with what she considers is a “Bet for Christianism in the Modern Times” that opts to favour “a better understanding between Anaian brothers” that means that she will accept AORTA in order to provide some extra muscle to the Huayramarcan tourism industry, a ban on mining as it means “disruption against the gift that we were given (nature)”, ban on abortion and LGBTQ marriage and a somewhat controverted proposal to introduce the learning of the Holy Bible on public schools across Huayramarca.

David Santos, a long-time communal leader of Santa Catarina, Cundinamarca; has a quite locked mindset when it comes to tourism, as tourists can “corrupt the livelihood and traditions of the places they visit”, which means his opposition towards AORTA and any proposal that might bolster tourism as an industry. Santos is a bit open towards abortion, leaving it “as it is” by law (authorises abort only if there’s no capability to provide good life conditions to a child or for births that might put mother’s life in risk) and considers that the LGBTQ agenda “is not worthy of attention”, since he prefers to “provide better life conditions via authorisation of mining activities with a sustainable execution plan.”

Popular Party: A Coast-focused party, with support mostly on Lima and neighbouring departments, stands for populist values and their intrinsic need to fulfill the needs of the ordinary citizen. Founded by Armando Jamarara on a meeting done at the department of Parcoy some weeks ago, this party struggles to grab some of the undecided people, especially those who are fed up of the current status quo and wishes to see a “renewed Huayramarca”. The party will present only one candidate, as there wasn’t anybody who desired to challenge Jamarara on the internal election process.

Jamarara desires to not allow mining activities, as it’s a “call of the Pachamama (Mother Earth) to respect her)”, the LGBTQ and abortion issues will be subjected to a referendum, as he desires to follow “the commandments of people, the ones that will elect me” while for AORTA his stance is in favour, as he considers that Huayramarca has a lot to offer and gain from said agreement, that will impact “positively” the way of life of people located in tourist spotlights.

His proposals are seen by some people as “lackluster” or “without self criteria” which converts him into a not so appealing option for voters in a country that traditionally seeks radical options to solve day-to-day issues.

As Trome, we will provide you with the best insights from our Electoral Analysis Centre and all the news that might pop out through this electoral marathon that will end in, about, 3 and a half months.

Sports: The qualifiers for the 90th World Cup starts tomorrow across the multiverse and Huayramarca is not an exception, after being paired on Group 5, sharing place with five-time World Cup Winners Valanora and our southeastern neighbours Krytenia, Huayramarca has an opportunity to provide redemption to its fans, as the team has had issues related to faltering on key moments and lack of consistence during the last two World Cup Qualifiers. Omar Caicedo and Rodolfo Zelaya have had enough time to provide some reengineering to a team and fans that seems to be glory thirsty.

“This will be a rather especial World Cup Qualifiers for Huayramarca” has said Carlos Infantozzi, newly-elected head of the Huayramarcan Football Federation as he promotes the new campaign of “Together Forever”. The campaign consists on making football a bond between regions and communities across Huayramarca, by providing to new markets the chance to see The Condors in action; this means that instead of the three venues we all are used to, Huayramarca will add Puerto San Carlos (San Carlos Archipelago), Lima (Lima), San Ignacio de la Frontera (Cajamarca) and Nauta (Sechura) as cities that will have National Team action for this qualifier.

“We want the Huayramarcan Football Community together, we want support from our fans across the nation in the most passion-filled way possible and with joy, as this is an event that doesn’t happens too often.” Said Infantozzi, while Rodolfo Zelaya added “Passion will be a key for us, we need your support and energy in order to lift the mood of this team. It’s a shoulder-to-shoulder effort to lift up a hostile environment against our rivals and a cozy one for our players.” As an integral part of those initiatives, a goal song has been created to celebrate “in a unique way” the goals that make The Condors soar.

Omar Caicedo also added “We, with Rodolfo and the team, have used the off-qualifying period in order to build a different mindset with the players, a newly offensive ideal to take our team and nation to the place it does deserve, to soar as the condor does, to have a better attitude and tactical disposal in order to make people feel even prouder of being Huayramarcans.”

The first match of the qualifier will be against Valanora at the Estadio Metropolitano in Guayaquil at 3:00 p.m. The National Government has declared tomorrow as an “off-day” in order to promote people to support our team in the quest for victory in a new edition of the World Cup Qualifiers.

by **Omerica** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 7:42 pm

MANDATORY DISCLAIMER: This post does not necessarily represent the personal opinions of the author about any person, place, thing or idea. Nothing contained within is canonical. Read with caution.

my awesome blog

The Perfect Guide to Everyone Else In World Cup Qualifying

I saw this on a website somewhere. The Carrot, I think. Or maybe it was The Parsnip. Or it might be The Radish. I can’t remember. I liked it, though, so I thought I would finish it.

Path 11
Teams: North Oldlandia; Zugzwang; Your Shoe; Eshan; Book Station; Catching a Rack Onion; Leander; Tuckernuck
Where did all the groups go? Are we not doing those this time? Anyway, I think I heard my friend talking about Zugzwang one time and he’s a nerd, so that means Zugzwang are probably really good and will win. Book Station also sounds like something he would really like, so I think they finish second. He also talks about how my shoes aren’t tied all the time, so I think Your Shoe finish third.

Path 12
Teams: Moonblaydia; Tumbles; Flavovovovovovespia; A Dab; North Costello; Quakourbush; The 14 Moons; Algerian Onion
I really like the look of Flavovovovovovespia. The “ovo” reminds me of an owl. I once met an owl and she was really nice, so I think the owl country wins this path. I’ve heard of A Dab. I think it’s a dance move. I really like to dance, so I want A Dab to finish second. I’m really torn between these moon countries, but I think Moonblaydia finish third. I wish we could have both of you though, but we can’t. Sorry.

Path 13
Teams: Ko-anden; Savillan; Atheists; Wall of Dares; Lusitinas; Gary Fauna; Kingdom of Voicemails; Galilean
I think Ko-anden is a really fun attacking team. It’s fun to watch them score a lot. No one can outscore them and they’re going to win the World Cup! I’m not sure about Atheists, but they sound like they could be a good team, so maybe they finish second. Wall of Dares sounds they are daring you with every free kick. Maybe you have to eat a chili pepper whenever you get a free kick. They finish third because that sounds really hard.

Path 14
Teams: Passage; Potato Farmers; Peppermare; The Licensing Isles; Tree Kid Stan; Haven Wild; Garden Hard; Automatic Republish
Passage. I heard my nerd friend talk about that a lot too, so I think they win, but Garden Hard sounds like a challenge. They grow some really great stuff. Maybe they grow that stuff they use in Cocoa-bo. They definitely finish second. And Peppermare sounds really nice. She sounds like the sweetest little horse from Εquеѕtrіа and I like her already. Too bad they play hoofball in Εquеѕtrіа, because I really want her to win.

Path 15
Teams: Methane; HAlavia; The Jaguars’ United Nations-ia; Ran Orca; Dalmatian; BOAT BOAT BOAT; United Advises; United Republics of Great Omerica
Omerica are supposed to be really good these days, right? Then if Omerica has become Great Omerica, they should be great then, right? I think they win. HAlavia sounds like fun, so I think they finish second. They probably laugh a lot there and that has to be good for your football, right? Also the “The Jaguars’ United Nations-ia” sounds like they get a lot of nations together to play football. They might win this group too, I guess.

Path 16
Teams: Nearfadillis; Udara; Sharkhead; Gambelia; Anchoring; Cheetahs and Reptiles Coalition; Sat Run; Takes War
My cousin visited Nearfadillis one time and she said it was really nice. Very peaceful place and not a kraken in sight. They should be really good at football if they don’t have to fight all those krakens. Nothing to get in the way of practice, so they will win easily. I say Udara takes second because it sounds like someone just took my friend’s name and added a random letter onto it. He’s really good at football, so they should be too. Gambelia is a good team and it will be close, but Udara is second.

Path 17
Teams: Banovina; Bernicia; Overdue And More; Euran Referendum Territories; Nathan Ford; Cabot Assure; Motherwell; Sangria
I don’t know what a Banovina is, but it sounds like it would be good at football. I don’t know any of these other nations, so I have to say Banovina win this group. Bernicia sound like a second-place team. The Euran Referendum Territories sound like they will be too busy voting to play football. They are probably really good when they do, but it sounds like they are doing other things at the moment. We’ll give them some time.

Path 18
Teams: The Wholly Expire; Ourtanija; Era Man; Sarnia; Westfield Lodge; Push Maya; Magnesia; Dead Raava
Ourtanija sounds like a great country to play football in. Everyone pitches in. Some people plant the pitch. Some people play on the pitch. Some people watch other people play on the pitch. It works so wonderfully and they will win this path! But the Wholly Expire doesn’t sound so nice. Maybe some mad cultists took over the Holy Empire and used it to end the world. That would be sad. But I think they would still be a good football country, so they will finish second.

Path 19
Teams: Videoslavia; Tea Carrot; Zeta Rake and Hugely Alton; Anand Cleft; Happy Popper; Whisper Tag; Kim-Finland; Rhubarb Ton
Video killed the audio star. I think that’s what my grandparents said. It’s Αuԁіοѕlаνіа but better, so they should win this path easily. Tea Carrot also sounds really good. I like tea, especially when it’s hot. And carrots are really tasty when you roast them. You can’t go wrong with both. Whisper Tag sounds really interesting, but I’m not sure how you win football if you whisper. Football is really loud and Whisper Tag will really struggle.

Path 20
Teams: Korandith; Czkormnuczyelamn Qrimnant Ztatz; Charleston; Send Hang; The Saurian; Northeast Westsouth; Strata Roots; The Republish of Eastern Sol
Did Bøb Übermanager finally get the Czkormnuczyelamn Qrimnant Ztatz job? I hope he did, because I hear he’s the multiverse’s greatest Fußball manager. There’s no way they can lose now. Korandith sound good, but they finish a distant second to any one of Bøb Übermanager’s teams. I also like the sound of Northeast Westsouth. I don’t know what it is, but it’s a bold decision to combine all four directions like that. They finish third.

Hope I didn’t forget anyone.

my awesome quote of the day:
“Heh, I can send little piles of poo to my friends!”

by **New Lusitania and the Algarves** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 8:22 pm

HERE WE GO AGAIN (!)…
(or A Negative and Positive and start to [just] another Campaign)

It may sound like we’ve started this way before, both in text and squad ideas and it’s likely because we have…! It’s the beginning of the 90th run to the World Cup trophy, as Qualifying gets under way tonight and so begins another cycle of hope and unity behind a team and an audacious dream.

At the same time, so begins another cycle of the old familiar sights. A good team, seemingly in transition for about four cycles now, will likely start off on the wrong foot and recover to the point where the country still believes we can make it to the playoffs on a consistent basis – and the World Cup eventually, maybe – only to miss out by a handful of points, points which may have been won in the sillier drops spread throughout the qualifying campaign. So, the hope is there but many in the numerous bars, cafés and tascas across the country will likely already be saying its lost before it has even begun!...
The interminable “The team just hasn’t changed in years, it’s like we don’t have more names around in a talented 18-team league. As good as they are, Patríce was there since 79, Silveira from 80… Fresh players is what we need, that and…”or the simple “Oh what’s the point really? We’ll draw at home against the unranked side and start questioning everything and in the end Grilo somehow makes it to WCQ91” – it truly is a divisive tournament.
However, there is hope this year. “The year where it all comes together” – isn’t it always. Grilo is now starting to get to grip and grouping eleven players in an interesting way to get consistency, even if the IAC was slightly lacklustre. The Selecção lost to TJUN-ia in the Round of 16 with the Jaguars being practically unstoppable, in that tournament… until a round later, despite playing excellently and being one of the favourites after the fact.
With a slightly shorter format, 160 teams start from twenty groups of 8. In Group 3, New Lusitania were placed in Group 2 after awaiting almost the entire evening just to find out, being placed in the third pot after the slump to 45th, a sign of the heightened competitivity going on in the Internationals scene, as a growing number of nations take part and also become more professional and consequently maintain better facilities to help them “go places”.
Pemecutan, a nation that shot up so quickly into the 20-somethings of the World Ranking that some fans had to re-check if it was true – a true fairytale success story in a way, they’re likely one of the most exciting teams to watch, just for the manner in which they reached the position, so be wary. Siovanija and Teusland are very well established in the Football World and are just a few positions inside, meaning that despite being tough sides and in different pots, they’re objectively some of the better draws, if you take the rankings to heart.
A weakened Equestria also makes an appearance – the Ponies clearly aren’t in their WR Top 5 glory days, but Canterlot remains an extremely tough location to travel to. Le Choix have managed to climb quite a lot since they last saw the Selecção too. Muralos has been a frequent adversary of the Selecção over in the IAC, but records will show they have never met in a Qualifier – a different experience, but another complicated side to immediately crack. New experiences come as well from The Cordian Isles and Nimishzz.
New Lusitania already have the most complicated of the bunch on Matchday 1 as they begin the venture in Pemecutan… at least it’s gotten over and done with, is the silver lining. Some fans feel confident, but Grilo has warned more about caution. A couple of new faces seep into the team as well and it seems players like Vinagrete might be changed for the newer ones around such as Mendonça ahead of the big match, with tactics being uncertain and adding something more to look out and forward to ahead of the World Cup Qualifiers.

by **Vdara** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 8:28 pm

Markos Moustakakos: Beginnings

Not much is known about Markos’ life before the age of 26. In fact, not much is known about Vdara before Markos turned 26. As far as the KPB rankings go, there never was a Vdara before Markos turned 26. Thankfully, FC Irakleio have some recollection of what the man was like before our first official participation in the World Cup.

Age - 0
FC Irakleio’s documents have Markos Moustakakos registered with a birthday of January 23rd, and a birthplace of “Vdara”. Who would’ve thought - Vdaran footballer born in Vdara. Cheers, Irakleio. Really handy, that. As far as we know, he was born somewhere rural with an orchard.

Age - 4
In his book, Markos states that his obsession with goalkeeping began in his back garden, where his father tossed apples at him for him to catch and collect in a sack. To make this boring task more exciting for the youngster, his dad made sure to toss the apples in varying directions, making them harder to catch - and yet, the boy kept catching those apples. He didn’t even know about football yet, but he was well on his way to stardom.

Age - 6
Wee Markos is taken to his first football game. By now, his talents had been noticed, and he was signed to his local school’s youth team, where he would regularly perform miracles at the regional level. I mean, six-year-olds can’t exactly kick balls that hard, but they don’t exactly have brilliant reflexes either - well, unless it’s Markos.

Age - 9
Consistent performances earn Markos a gig with Western Cretan Juniors, which happened to be a youth football club based in the western half of Crete. He continued his solid performances, and his dad was keen to note that it was around this time that scouts began to pop up at his matches, watching Markos and noting down whenever he’d make a save or a silly mistake. In addition, we have a copy of Markos’ school report card from this time:

Vdaran - Δ
Greek - Δ
Maths - Γ
Sport - A
Art - Δ

Overall - Γ

Not the wisest wee guy, but a sporty wee guy nonetheless.

Age - 14
Markos is offered his first academy contract at a pro football team - AS Chania, in the second tier of Vdaran football. There, he was immediately placed in their U-16 team and regularly featured in AS’ first team training drills, where players at the time noticed that he was “something else” albeit that he was “a bit of a nutcase”. Nevertheless, his performances at such a young age had AS Chania’s managerial team practically begging the Vdaran FA to let the boy play in their first team - but alas, their begging was dismissed, and we would have to wait another two years until the breakthrough of Markos.

Age - 16
A young Markos Moustakakos gets his first professional contract offered to him by AS Chania, and accepts on the condition that he’s immediately placed into the first team. This was practically guaranteed anyway, but he wanted to make sure that he played for that sweet, sweet 400€ per week. His debut for the club was marred by an early red card for one of AS’ defenders, and it ended 3-1 to the opposition.

Age - 18
Markos earns a spot in the Beta League Team of the Season, and AS Chania begin to receive large bids for the starlet. They hold on to their man, however, with the aim of mounting a promotion charge. The charge fails, however - with heartbreak on the last day when FC Irakleio scored a last minute winner to go ahead of AS Chania on goal difference, despite their best efforts. In a cruel twist of fate for Chania, Markos is signed by Irakleio for a fee of just 500,000€.

Age - 19
FC Irakleio, having made multiple signings with an aim of “just survive”, shock the Alpha League by finishing in the top half, conceding only 26 goals in 33 games. Yet again, Markos is named in a Team of the Season, and is touted with a call-up to the national team. Due to his age, however, he would not receive this. Instead, he’d have to prove that he could do this for multiple seasons rather than just the one lucky break.

Age - 22
Markos receives his first “unofficial” callup to the Vdaran national team, in Vdara’s pre-World Cup era. Not much is known about his performances here, but his league form continued as you’d expect - consecutive ToTS appearances, a wage increase, et cetera.

Age - 26
Vdara fades into the multiverse, and thus so does Markos. WC84 is a bit of a horror show for Vdara - first cycle nerves and all. Vdara failed to keep a clean sheet in their opening TWELVE matches, with the first coming in a 2-0 win over Quakmybush. Took them long enough. It was the only clean sheet they had all tournament, as Markos saw 50 goals fly straight past him in only 20 games - an average of 2.5 goals conceded per game, conceding six against group winners Equestria. Fuckin’ OUCH.

Age - 28
A stellar improvement in form saw Vdara take their first clean sheet in six games during WC85, all thanks to a Markos Masterclass. It wasn’t exactly all sunshine and roses, however - they would only keep another two clean sheets in a 24-game qualifiers. Still, it was an improvement to an average of 1.7 goals conceded per game. Not too shabby, eh?

Age - 30
Markos’ national team record took a massive hit, despite his side taking only five games to achieve a clean sheet during WC86. Shame they only kept 2 all tournament though, with an average of 2.2 goals being conceded per game. Nothing much else to say here - just a generally underwhelming performance from our man. (Y’know, I’m beginning to realise this guy wasn’t as good as I remembered…) However, Markos does get his first foray into management, winning the U-18 World Cup with a rag-tag squad of young boys of dubious quality. As a result, we start to see a lot more of Markos in management…

Age - 32
The dual-lineup system is introduced to the Vdaran national team in WC87, with Markos appointed manager of the younger lineup, creatively named “Lineup 2”. His efforts help Vdara on to their first ever qualification, as whether at the sidelines or between the sticks, he was involved in every result. Vdara’s first clean sheet came on the first game, in a match where (funnily enough) Markos wasn’t even in goals. Vdara would take three clean sheets across the qualifiers, conceding 33 goals in 18 games (average 1.8 per game). The Group Stage should, quite frankly, be entirely forgotten about - Markos started all 3 matches, conceding an average of 3.33 per game. It was around this point where Markos began to consider if his career as a goalkeeper was worth continuing, as his managerial record had been quite good for a relative newcomer to management.

Age - 34
A bog-standard start to WC88 saw Markos appointed permanent manager mid-qualifiers, with him consequently announcing his retirement from professional football as a player - albeit, it was too late to make a real impact, as the team would still finish third. Since Markos was no longer playing in goals, it would be quite unfair to talk about his clean sheet ability - but his managerial ability was made clear for all to see, with the Vdarans under his management earning a record of 10-1-2. Room for improvement, sure, but not too bad for his first time in charge of the senior squad!

Age - 36
In Markos’ first full cycle as manager, things went extraordinarily well. Placed in a group with Valanora and Yuezhou, little was expected from the previous cycle’s third-placers - and yet, Markos pulled off an absolute masterclass, topping the group with a 14-1-3 record and a team-record low average of 1.4 goals conceded per game, taking Vdara to a group stage for a second time. Again, Markos pulled off some miracles, going unbeaten in the group stage with an 0-3-0 record (They did concede 1.7 per game in the group stage but shhhhhhhhhhhhhh).

So, here we are. Markos is now 38 years old and ready to manage the Vdarans once more. His skill as a goalkeeper on the international stage may be disputable, but domestically and as a manager - he’s always been stellar. His record speaks for itself, and if all goes well it should speak for itself even more as he matures into a more experienced and wiser manager. As for now, however - we’ll just have to wait and see if another Markos Masterclass awaits us in the matchdays that follow.

A man of the players.
A man of the fans.
Markos Moustakakos.

”Without your loyal support, who knows where we’d be - but let’s not even begin to entertain that idea. What matters is the fact that you all chose to turn up and support us through thick and thin, through hell and high water, from Valanora to Daehae, from Yuezhou to Aix-les-Filles, you followed us, you chanted our names, and you made a hell of a noise along the way! We’re back where we belong, and y’all made sure of that! Forza Vdara!” - Markos Moustakakos, following a 6-2 win over Gyatso-kai

works? · by **Abanhfleft** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 8:37 pm

Not-So-Young Guns, Part One

A lot of things had changed since the last time that the 23 players who had made up the Abanhfleft under-18 squad that had participated in the 3rd Under-18 World Cup had seen each other, but in a sense, nothing had also changed for that group of players who had attempted to bring football glory to the Democratic Republic at such a young age. This particular group had failed to bring home the Under-18 World Cup in the face of an Anglatia squad determined to keep the championship in their shores, and in the intervening years, no Abanhfleft team had managed to win the Under-18 World Cup. Tragedy had also struck this group of players, and they had lost one of their own just a few months after that loss in the final of the 3rd Under-18 World Cup. It wasn’t self-inflicted though; Marius Gerhard Rosenkrantz had lost his life in a terrorist bombing orchestrated by the notorious “Real Fans of Abanhfleft.” He wasn’t the target of their ire, but even then the death of such a young and promising player had sent shockwaves throughout the footballing world of Abanhfleft as the unprovoked attack showed that everyone was vulnerable to the wrath of the “Real Fans.” And while, for a moment, the remaining 22 players had been brought together by solidarity for their fallen comrade, inevitably they all drifted away from each other as their respective careers took them to all corners of Abanhfleft and even the greater multiverse itself.

Some players, like Guildenstern Cardew and Bronwyn Churchill, managed to reach the incredible heights of winning the league with their respective teams, while others sought out success away from home like Kelly McGinnis and Georgine Baum. A few, like Karamoko Bakayoko, shone brightly for a few years after their time with the national junior setup before fading away due to not living up to the hype anymore, and still there were others like Basheer Dohood and the Alto Aragon twins who simply went right back into obscurity and were forgotten by both time and the fans themselves. For those who were good enough (or lucky enough) to become part of the senior national team, the times that they were training together for the national team were when they could catch up with what had happened in their lives and talk about wishes and desires and, later on, frustrations and disappointments. And for the Fleftic players, there was certainly more than their fair share of disappointment through the years.

One such player who had been thoroughly disappointed by her experience with the Fleftic national football team was Kelly McGinnis. So many years had passed since she was first called up to the senior women's team that she could no longer remember when it happened, but what she did remember was the fact that Abanhfleft had never had any joy in football. Oh sure, there were massive wins against teams that the country had seemingly never been able to beat before, but in the grand scheme of things, Abanhfleft had never won so much as a single trophy in the field of football. For some, it might seem strange that an entire nation had such a fixation and obsession for winning trophies, and some would and had definitely pointed out that the point of international sports was to have fun. But there were many Fleftics, and Kelly was one of them, who believed that the true aim of sports was to win, and Abanhfleft hadn't been doing a lot of that in terms of football championships. Whether it was the World Cup itself or the Independent Associations Championship or even the smaller Women's World Cup, Abanhfleft had definitely stumbled and fallen flat on their faces with regards to claiming the ultimate victory in those tournaments.

But that wasn't the only thing that disappointed Kelly. She was also disappointed in how her club football career had turned out. Sure, she may have gotten that dream move away from Abanhfleft when she was signed by the Mercedinian club Hoventon and Corlington Town, but for her that was the highlight of her club career. She hadn't won a lot of trophies with H&C, and after the first few seasons she no longer felt any sort of excitement when she put on the uniform and stepped onto the pitch. She was just turning up to practice and on game day, barely paying any attention to anything and just going through the motions. For all Kelly knew, she could have been transferred to a different club and she wouldn't even know it. The only times that she would get excited to suit up and play once again was when she was back in Abanhfleft to train with the other girls on the national team, but even that was fading away after all the disappointment caused by the national team to the rest of the country. It was getting harder and harder to care about results when the ending was almost always the same: getting knocked out in the first round of the playoffs by some two-bit team who only bothers to turn up once the blue, orange, and green come out to play against them. Kelly could still remember the bullshit calls in the games against HUElavia and Saterun, and it was the reason why she no longer liked underdog stories in sports. Abanhfleft always seemed like the villain in those stories, and even when the tables were turned and Abanhfleft were now the underdogs, they could never win against their opponents too. Just an endless string of disappointments and failures.

And, Kelly couldn't deny, some of the blame for that lay in the team as well. Defeat had happened to them so many times that oftentimes, the only thing that their coaches could say to them was "Let's not blow this one again, ladies." But more times than not, they still blew it. There were times when Kelly knew she was as much at fault for it as the rest of the team. If only she had been just that tiny bit quicker to get to the ball than the defender or the goalkeeper, if only she had aimed for the far post instead of the near one, that sort of thing. But there were also times when she knew that she was doing everything right but the pieces flat out refused to fall into place for her. Those were the times where Kelly had seemingly a thousand shots on target, yet both the opposing goalkeeper and the woodwork were doing their best to deny her as much as possible. Now those games were the infuriating ones because those were the games where Kelly knew that she had done everything that she could to win the game for the team and she still couldn't do it. And those games were beginning to happen more and more throughout her career.

It also didn't help that the entire team was going through some upheavals of its own. Kelly, along with everyone else in the national team setup, was surprised when she found out that two players, Erin Jensdottir-Jennings and Britt Hanokssen-Hanks, had been suspended from the national team for reasons that were undisclosed at the time. And then the Ripperonin scandal erupted and spread like wildfire throughout most of the football teams in the multiverse, and Abanhfleft was just one of the many countries to be affected by the scandal. Abanhfleft didn't have a Ripperonin doping program per se, but after government investigations found out that Ripperonin had been freely circulating in the country's water supply since 2013 at the very least, every single sportsperson in Abanhfleft was tested for Ripperonin, and every single one came back positive. It was only after this revelation that the Samahang Futbol ng Abanhfleft revealed that the association had suspended Jensdottir and Hanokssen because they tested positive for Ripperonin in their previous medical. In all honesty, Kelly wasn't surprised that Erin had taken Ripperonin because there were whispers throughout the team that Erin was a junkie and was addicted to substances ranging from barely legal to outright forbidden. But the fact that Britt also tested positive was a surprise to Kelly because she didn't expect Britt to be that kind of person as well. And then Kelly remembered that she had also tested positive for Ripperonin, along with every other player on the national team, and that was when she realized just how big and pervasive the Ripperonin scandal actually was. Kelly knew that she had not taken a single milligram of any performance enhancers, but because she was drinking water contaminated with Ripperonin, there could have been a moment when she could have been suspended or even disqualified because of it. And that was what had shaken her to the core, and now, one year on from the scandal, it was still shaking her.

Another thing that had shaken Kelly was the fact that she had just turned 30 years old. It felt like it was just yesterday when she celebrated her 20th birthday, and now she had hit the big 3-and-0. "Where had it all gone?" she wanted to ask herself. Her life had been consumed so much by football that she had barely had any time left for anything else, and now she felt like she had to rush to catch up on a lot of things. But because there was so much that she wanted to do, she didn't even know where to start at all. And as she put on that familiar white uniform for what felt like the thousandth time, Kelly knew that she had to start changing things somewhere or else she would be going down the same boring routine once again. And she didn't want to do that if she could help it.

by **Schima Bas** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 8:43 pm

A Corruption of the Beautiful Game: The Story of Arena Chapel and its Perfidious Priest

Foreword by Dean Colley Whitworth, the author

Any good gentleman of football, as I am wont to call myself and my dearest friends, having spent the earliest years of our memory with the quiet, solemn contemplation¹ of the beautiful sport and its swift movements, precise teamwork, and the swish of ball on finely-manicured grass, is filled with positive sentiment of all the game’s pleasures, and on the other hand brimming with frustration from all the game’s negative elements. The following story, I’m afraid to convey, is of the latter.

Before I proceed with explanation of what has recently happened with Arena Chapel, its confusing football club/church structure, its corrupt and devious leader Leeland James Jr, its involvement in attempting to defraud the Crown Premier League into allowing itself into the fold of top-division basian football, and finally its unbelievable recovery and establishment in the First Basian Division, I must first describe the principal characters involved in the tale.

Firstly we have the preacher of Arena Chapel: Mr.² Leeland James Jr, a man whose mustache is too groomed and manicured to sit upon the face of the devil it rests on, and whose trademark country aesthetics are simply yet another vehicle by which he can further deceive onlookers in regards to his true being and nature.

Researching the man’s birth and life has been difficult, seeing as how the expeditious legal apparatus that surrounds him has largely succeeded in scrubbing the public (and in some cases private) records of any detail that is not in some way of function a falsehood, leaving researchers such as myself forced to do the work that the journalists will not, for fear of reprisal from the well-connected and practically invulnerable mogul.

My research suggests that he was born where the coastal states of Schima Bas now lie, in the quiet countrysides and developing industry of that land before the civil war. His father, Leeland James Sr. made his riches in the growing textile industry of that region, playing a key role in the construction and maintenance of local supply chains in the city of Dos Arbores³ to support the developing industrialization of the country.

Leeland James was a fat little child, swift to anger and tantrum, and his father harbored a not-so-hidden disdain for the son that carried his name. Early in his schooling years the youngster took to thievery, and had a forked tongue that lied with the beauty of childhood innocence. Once close friends of his, many of whom I have interviewed, have called him two-faced and conniving. “He never found a scheme he didn’t like”, said one.

He took interest in religion not as many religious people do: out of sincere belief in a higher power, but upon witnessing the passing of the tithe box during his family’s annual visit to their church for Christmas service. His father wrote in his journal following the event:

“The child found great admiration of the giving box at the service today, and would not silence about the topic for the entire week following it, hounding the wife and myself at every waking hour with wonder that people were giving their own coin to other men freely without exchange.”

Following graduation from secondary, Leeland decided to pursue a career in ministry. He hopped between jobs with multiple churches in Dos Arbores before moving to Ourelasia, finding a home on the staff of upstart Reverend Dick Pourtulli, a raucous and fiery man aged in his 30s that seemed to have more in common with the righteous bellowers of the countryside than the intellectual liberalized preachers common to the urban space.

In Pourtulli’s system, which emphasized using mass media to evangelize to the non-believing of the nation as well as the broader Atlantic Oceania region, Leeland learned the basics of broadcasting, and the charismatic preacher took an interest in the young man, expediting his hunt for fame and renown.

After impressing with a part-time stint in a small church adjacent to Pourtulli’s, covering for the main pastor after an injury left him bedridden⁴, the preacher granted his young student the role of lead pastor in a recently-opened neighborhood church in Ourelasia’s Jesper borough, an unlikely achievement for the 21-year-old. The two had a falling out shortly after this appointment, and have not spoken to each other since. Some allege that this conflict arose because Pourtulli caught the young now-pastor in a lie, but neither of the two are willing to speak a word about the situation.

Following his appointment to the Jesper borough church, Leeland began to deviate from generally accepted christian doctrine, and began telling parishioners that he was a prophet of God, and delivered special revelation similar to that of the Old Testament prophets. Many in the christian community of Ourelasia were outraged, but the preacher was able to withstand any and all outside attacks. He formulated a “Righteous Cabinet” of like minded deacons in his church, which served to advise the young preacher and his growing ministry, which became increasingly theatrical⁵, expanding beyond brick-and-mortar ministry into the televised arena.

With almost uninhibited growth in his venture, Leeland’s next move appeared to be lunacy to outside eyes. One day, parishioners were shocked to find the doors to the church locked, the windows nailed over, with the only explanation found in the form of a note affixed to the side entrance ⁶ that stated the following:

I have been called, like the Prophet Abraham, to leave the land of my birth and to enter into a new land of God

Where the crafty cleric found himself next, for reasons I will explain in the main sections, was Arena Chapel, a small town in the rural state of Morissland.

The next character I must explain before proceeding with the story is Mr. Abbas Rasini, Director of Moral Cleansing for the Emirate of Schima Bas. Firstly, I must explain that the system of governance in Schima Bas is rather confusing, and lax, to outsiders. Whereas the country is an Absolute Monarchy, in which the government, by which I mean the Emir, is subject to none of the checks and balances which liberal governments might be accountable towards. The Emir (Always spelled that way, never any different) is a leader whose nature is far too deep for human contemplation. In ways of governance, there are very rarely decrees which may be put into action by human actors. The Emir, you see, is very direct. However, these decrees are not wholly unknown. Recent decrees established a national football league, for instance. One of these decrees set about the creation of the governmental job position: The Director of Moral Cleansing, which was filled by Abbas Rasini, a figure whose bones can be seen through his skin, always scowling, never resting. Most men will never meet Abbas Rasini, and those that have not wish that they never shall.

This job has been mostly centered around reigning in the actions of gambling giants in the country. The Emir never sets out to destroy any practice wholly, but by means of disincentivization makes actions that upset The Emir displeasurable undertakings. Abbas Rasini is one of the bestowers of such displeasure.

Rasini first set out to rid the cities of the plague of gambling, and shortly after his appointment, the disappearance of various men was noticed. Some were written about in news stories, pushed to the border of advertisements concerning adult diapers and cat litter. Most were not recorded at all. The gambling industry in the major cities crumbled with no foundation.

These are the two principal figures in the story I will now proceed with. I pray the description I have just written is insightful and provides a basis of knowledge that will assist the reader in comprehension.

Sincerely,

Dean Colley Whitworth
The Schima Bas Gentleman of Football

Notes from the author

1 Basian football has a minority culture of "divine football", in which silence by attendants of matches is expected and the game is simply the background for a deeper contemplation of the intellectual pursuits of the time. While groups that practice this are shrinking, some basian clubs have instituted policies that keep the practice alive, most notably Basian Blac in the Crown Premier League.

2 Although Mr. Leeland James Jr. may appear to be in every way a preacher, with documentation entitling him “Reverend”, I shall not be referring to the man as such, due to my understanding of his actions and nature. It is likely, in my researched opinion, that such documentation is forgery regardless, in one way or another.

3 Dos Arbores is now known as a refuge for many Basian millionaires and billionaires, becoming a sort of home for the old bourgeois families, but it was not always so. Before the war, the region was very pastoral, and only through the development of capitalists did it achieve its current form.

4 I would be lying if I said this did not raise within me my own suspicions. For now, any evidence of impropriety has not been discovered.

5 Many elements, including the “Lord’s great gifts” tithing section of Leeland’s preaching theatre were taken directly from Rev. Pourtulli’s services. Pourtulli has attempted more than once to sue Leeland over this, but, at time of writing, has not been successful.

6 In my interviews with various people connected with Leeland James Jr, I found contact with a member of a construction worksite that claimed he had an encounter with Mr. James in which he and his staff were recruited by the preacher to block off the church, having been paid 10,000 koin to do the job in the dead of night.

Upcoming lineups
MD 1: Cassadaigua @ @ Basian Sports Complex, Ourelasia (40,000)

Tebrum Bourreau,
Volfango Di Lello, Avery Cloutier, Gilles Bertrand, Khuld Montemayor,
(C) Makin Moghaddam, Bisma Shehadeh, Mukarram el-Muhammad, Leonard Charbonneau,
Hideki Nazar, Casildo Hana

by **United Adaikes** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 8:46 pm

Two months before the Qualifiers for the World Cup 90

"In a non-surprising move by the United Adaikes Football Association, they fielded the 22 starters of the two national football teams, with the addition of a 3rd goalkeeper, Lora Barnet, Abby Kidd's first substitute in the women's team. Myron Lillakis, the head of the UAFA, announced yesterday night that Dylan Burke, the men's team head coach, will lead the World Cup Qualifiers team, with Star Marquez as Dylan's #2 in the Coaching Staff. Their respective Assistant Coaches are also on board. The Goalkeeping Coach was the only technical staff named, and it's from Burke's domestic team staff, 41-year-old Edweena Hathaway. The details for the Fitness Coaches, Physios, and other specialized coaches and staff will be announced when they become finalized. Still, it has also been speculated that it will come from the domestic league system of the United Adaikes.

"With 15 international appearances from the women's national football team and 13 appearances from the men's national football team, and while these are arguably fresh appearances, many pundits are asking if these appearances are enough for the team to bring glory for the country. And while others expected not to aim high as this is the country's first World Cup experience, some believe that the Adaikesians may not progress in the World Cup but see them finish in the middle of the pack, regardless of their opponents."

One month before the Qualifiers

"Dylan!" Lillakis answered his phone, still in his office. "So glad to hear from you! What made you call?"

"The World Cup Committee has released the results of the Group Draw for the Qualifiers, sir," Dylan replied.

"Please, Dylan, call me Myron."

"Ah, yes, Myron, er, we are in Group 15, with eight teams."

"How about the schedule?"

"We play our first game here at home -"

"Okay, tell the groundskeeper of the New Thraproy Sports Complex to prepare the Main Stadium. Who are we welcoming first in our country?"

"It's Ethane, sir, the top-seeded team in our group."

"Oh."

Prolonged silence.

"Well, Dylan, once you have the full copy of the schedule, I want to see it, too."

"Yes, sir."

"And good luck. Show the world that we are not just a rookie team too happy to play in the Qualifiers. The previous tournaments showed that we can be pushovers, too."

"Thank you, sir!"

Two weeks before the Qualifiers

International sports observers are astounded as the Adaikesian domestic sports leagues have showed that they are not interested in importing players from other countries. Some pro-Adaikesian observers, on the other hand, argue that the Adaikesian domestic football league system, among others, is still drafting their policy for international transfers. It is important to note that the only successful transfer the country has made since starting to become active in the international sports was the transfer by three Adaikesian volleyball players to play in Quebec and Shingoryeo. Also, some protesting international observers are stating the no-response of domestic football teams Perthdoches Hyenas and Wrarnerbadshot Watchers in the undisclosed offers from Vilitan teams are "like a slap in the face," as one local newspaper described it. The mentioned teams released a statement about not being interested in listening to offers for their young players only after the transfer window closed.

However, players who had played in international tournaments were asked and if they were to choose, majority of them only wants to play in the country, unless a pretty good offer, not only in wages, is to be put into the table. But with the policy draft being shown to all domestic leagues and their teams, the first to say if the player is going elsewhere will be the team that currently holds the player's contract. But the players' associations are looking to broker a deal that can also be a win-win for all parties before a foreign team gets to talk to a player.

by **Metherwoll** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 8:54 pm

here awrite lads the name’s tam an’ am the coach of metherwa’. a hear we’ve got new groupmates. fuckin’ delightful.

ban-eejit
apparently these folk are actually quite good at fitba. but can these folk handle SEEEEEEEEEEEBOOOOOOOO? fuckin’ thought no. if ye cannae outplay the angry baldy bastard we’ve got upfront, yer walloped. simple as.

bren-irn bru
i hear these folk like tae defend. we quite like tae defend, but no always. irn bru is made fae girders anyway, an’ if these folk are made fae girders then we willnae win.

cabo ashite
they any good? nae clue personally. al just pretend that they’re good an’ it’ll aw be awrite.

latham-fud
fud.

eura dobber territories
no even the real hing, just the “territories”. easy as, mate. just play SEEEEEEEEEEEBOOOOOOOO and win mate.

oberour the morra
here the day, gone ar moro. haw haw haw.

sangtinpot
who’s the most tinpot, the ones wi’ “ti” in their name or us, the numpties who play in wee jamie’s garden? fuck knows, mate. we’ll find out.

right, yous have had yer fun - that’s aw yer getting. if yous want mair words fae me, ask me something after a win. if we dinnae win, DINNAE ASK. otherwise am setting seebs on ye. isn’t that right, seebs?

”SEEEEEEEEEEEBOOOOOOOO kick pesky journalist.” - seebs

too right, mate.

by **Saint Eleanor** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 8:59 pm

Oneshot: It's About Place

the afternoon of Thursday 5th February 1997

This wasn't the experiment that Sean Ellis wanted. In fact, this wasn't even the experiment that Sean Ellis needed. He was into his third year at the Polytechnic, bored out of his arse, in need of some money - after all, this was Buckhead district - and felt like putting "your name forward for a study on individual freedom, incentives and morality" would be a good idea. That was a couple of days ago, of course... and he was still pretty much all of those things. And first up.

"So..." flowed a clanging voice from a speaker somewhere. "Yes. Hello. You have been selected to take part in this, a study - as we have said - into how people behave. I will not go over all of the details again, but these are most important. In a few seconds, I will read off a number that represents a dollar value." Good enough, he must have thought; free money was always good.

"There is a button in front of you that will destroy a car somewhere in the car park of the University's Psychology Department, and you should push that button when you feel like that dollar value gives you enough satisfaction to let you do so confidently." Wait - this can't be right. Smashing stuff up just to get richer? At least it wasn't Poly.

"Funds are limited, but you may collect your bursary upon the end of this study. Thank you." Not even that. Ellis, suspecting and expecting that he'd just have to ride out the course, just sat there, thinking, waiting, perhaps even fearing. For the time being"ONE HUNDRED!" ...that was a bit soon. He almost hammered on the dreaded button out of frustration, but just hit whatever that tabley thing was instead.

"TWO HUNDRED!" Some more time passed. This time, nothing happened. "FOUR HUNDRED!" Still nothing. "EIGHT HUNDRED!" Nothing. "SIXTEEN HUNDRED!" Nothing. "THIRTY-TWO HUNDRED!" Nothing. "SIXTY-FOUR HUNDRED!" Nothing... but maybe some twitching.

"ONE-HUNDRED AND TWENTY-EIGHT HUNDRED!" A little bit of thinking. And then action. Suddenly, a screen turned on, appearing to show very fuzzy - untimestamped - footage of a car, sat among many others of its kind. All is calm - and then one is, very suddenly and very sharply, bright. A noise even more perturbing than the announcer of recent memory, presumably courtesy of a well-organised camera crew, barged into the room unannounced. Finally, an inexplicable and twisted mess.

...Why?

"Thank you for participating. Please report to upstairs." He reluctantly did, after a couple of minutes, and was handed $300 for his troubles. A few months later, it was all over the papers - everybody got the same amount, nobody got to destroy anything, the timer stopped at just over fifteen million dollars, and the announcer was out of a job.

by **Montana Verde** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 9:03 pm

Indujo – 4 (0)
Aksinwala (60’), Mersiás (67’, 70’), Kumar (78’)

Montaña Verde – 1 (0)
Dolfo; Roberta, Arquímedes, Jairo (77’), Justin (31’); Ana-Ximena (87’); Valentinha (49’ Emma ), Kristjana; Primitivo (80’); Verónica Ximena (61’ Naomí Berrocal ), Osito (66’ Benji )

Article from the Verdean soccer magazine, Cuatro-Cuatro-Dos.

Gnomo “disappointed” by lack of change in Condors’ roster

by **Yue Zhou** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 10:41 pm

How Each Member of Group 11 Will Celebrate If They Win The World Cup

South Newlandia will

Lisander will

Eshialand will

Brookstation will consume thousands of pounds of celebratory Friday Chicken and take to the streets in celebration.

The ROUDY FANS of Texkentuck will POOR BEER on themselves. KAW KAW KAW

Yuezhou will not win the World Cup.

Zwangzug will

The most diehard fans of Gatchingerrak Union will do something they believe to be "kinky", but will in fact start a sequence of events that will lead to 120 being injured and the destruction of NS$51.7 million dollars' worth of property.

by **Vilita** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 10:41 pm

Well, It's that Time again. Welcome to World Cup 90 Qualifying. Scores to Follow shortly (LINK TO SCORES HERE). Note this cutoff was delayed by 60-90 mins bc of MD 1. MD2/3 will be at the advertised time approximately 46.5 hours from now!

CUTOFF SONG

Note, Signups for the Vilitan Mountain Games & Kleptochase World Championships are still open. Those interested in participating may signup within the next 24-36 hours at latest

The first scores of the competition will be posted along with the MD 2/3 Cutoff for WC90Q.

The Tropics of Vilita invite athletes from across the multiverse to compete in the Vilitan Mountain Games, a collection of competitive athletics, specialty events and local traditions from the Vilitan Mountain regions, and the return of the Kleptochase World Championships. Spectators and family are welcome to attend to take in the entertainment including traditional dance and entertainment, food and casual games for all ages over the duration of the celebration. The Tropics of Vilita is located in the region of Atlantian Oceania, the oldest remaining major Sporting Region and competition in unique sports like Kleptochase are foundational to that culture. Click Here to Signup via Google Sheets

by **Starblaydia** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 11:19 pm

All or Nothing: Starblaydia promotional image

All or Nothing: Starblaydia is a sports documentary series distributed across streaming platforms, premiering in its both its domestic market and abroad in 2274 (Starblaydi Calendar) to mark three centuries of international competition by the Starblaydia national football team. Produced in conjunction with the Starblaydia 300 celebrations, the series draws on three hundred years of documentary and archive footage, interviews, analysis, opinion and commentary to tell the stories of fifteen iconic games in the history of the national team, beginning with their debut in the Qualifiers of World Cup 15 all the way back in 1974.

The series is narrated by notable veteran actor Enrico Ramos and includes contributions from players, managers, officials, journalists and fans, and episodes will be released in full week by week to prevent binge-watching in accordance with Starblaydi broadcasting rules for the health of the nation.

1. The Statement - Play now

A meeting with a top-16 side in World Cup Qualifying gives both the team and their star striker an opportunity to lay down a marker right at the very beginning of their international journey.

2. The Gatekeepers - Play now

After eight years, the team stands at the threshold of qualifying for the greatest tournament in the world for the first time. In their path, however, is a difficult a win-or-go-home playoff.

3. The Breakthrough - Play now

On home soil, the team make it to a second straight regional final against the regional powerhouse and threepeat champions. A future manager makers a big impression.

4. The Last - Play now

As the nation co-hosts the World Cup for the very first time, it's time for one legendary star to finally bow out, but he's not going without a final hurrah.

5 The First - Play now

Against one of the greatest and most-decorated countries in history, the team have their first opportunity to lift the most coveted prize in sports. A younger brother builds himself a legend.

6 The Double - Play now

Facing an opponent usually found across the diplomatic aisle, there's a chance to hold the two most prestigous trophies in football at once. A departing veteran and debutant make impressions

7. The Betrayal - Play Now

Defending their world title in the home of an old enemy, the team are undefeated and face the World Cup co-hosts, but there's a threat of treachery in the last eight.

8. The Return - Play Now

After being away for a decade, the team returns to international football and the Baptism of Fire, where they come face to face with a very familar name.

9. The Record - Play Now

The luck of the draw sparks an unexpectedly deep run in the World Cup and throws up a game that will go down in the history books.

10. The Comeback - Play Now

As environmentalism turns the whole country green, the team will need to find an endless source of renewable energy to keep going.

11. The Nemesis - Play Now

Two of the greatest teams in the history of football go head-to-head to decide once and for all who really is the best in the multiverse, and it's a battle of the elves.

12. The Robbery - Play Now

Two unfashionable teams from outside the top 30 make the World Cup Final in a classic clash of styles, but who will emerge the victor, and how will it affect the future?

13. The Bottom - Play Now

Having not qualified for the World Cup in 40 years and with the campaign for the AOCAF Cup going poorly, a final group game against one of their old rivals offers a repreive for an embattled coach.

14. The Fightback - Play Now

With the new coach revitalising the entire organisation of the team from the ground up, an appearance in a youth cup final beckons with a rematch from earlier in the tournament.

15. The Coronation - Play Now

After ending the hopes of one nation in their own stadium at the Semi-Final stage, the team faces the other co-host in their own national stadium for their first World Cup final appearance for 80 years.

by **StrayaRoos** » Sat Jan 15, 2022 11:34 pm

Interviewer:Ange,so What is the target For the Socceremus in World Cup 90
Ange:Just getting to the Cup of Harmony Knockouts and being top 200 ranked is the Target

Interviewer:What about Cruz Kaiplo and Harry Cahill
Ange:they’re definitely the Deadliest Duo in Anaia considering in Tumbra they Scored 12 goals and Cahill got the Silver Boot but Kaiplo,he’s The Only Roosian Outside of the SPL or Islands Cup in the V-League’s 3rd Division for Cedniavella and Might Move to Tikariot,Zwangzung or Chromatika in the Near Future

Interviewer:What is Your Opinion on the Backing StrayaRoos has gotten from HUElavia and The Ochre Islands
Ange:I’m honestly Shocked as An BoF Group Stage team Usually fails to Progress anywhere and Considering an 7-3 Defeat to The Cordian Isles

Interviewer:What About the U21’s in the Di Bradini Cup
Ange:Well the Kaiplo Kids will strike an few and Kuyta will be Crucial to them

by **Tumbra** » Sun Jan 16, 2022 2:17 am

Tumbra 3-2 Adab

TMB (4-2-3-1): 1 - Lennon; 2 - Hughes, 14 - Kerr (5 - Henderson, 72'), 4 - Ashburn, 3 - Harris (27 - Sheppard, 65'); 6 - Hicks, 15 - Harrison, 10 - Cole; 17 - Fraser (7 - Hilton, 79'), 9 - Vaughn; 11 - Riordan

TMB scorers: Nick Riordan (13', 49'); Trudy Harrison (84')

Player of the Match: Nick Riordan (TMB)

Link to arc home
defender meets midfielder: season 5, part 2
extra room

Chromia

"Nice place, isn't this, Trudy? Airy, lots of light, comes furnished, even," said Ami Coulibaly as she traced her hand on a countertop, the walnut-coloured table contrasting nicely with the whiteness of the rest of the room. "And it's relatively private. I know I'd have loved to get this place, but I didn't want his commute to be, y'know."

"I don't know, Ami. It still feels like it's missing...something."

"C'mon, Tru, this is the third house in three weeks. You've said that every time we've gone to these viewings. No house is gonna be perfect, we've just got to find one that suits you the most."

"If I'm going to be living somewhere long-term, Ami, I'm gonna need an environment that I can feel comfortable in. First house..."

"First house was too dark, which, okay, fair. Second house was too empty and too far from the Dome, which I would've understood if you didn't insist on taking public transportation, or the fact that you can fill it in with your own furniture..."

"I'm not ready for a car, Ami, and neither are you. West Chromia's pretty quiet. It'd be nice to stay in if it wasn't for the fact that, well, it's far away. And emptiness can't be solved with just furniture."

"Ma'am, I can assure you that this apartment complex offers top notch privacy and security. Your private life won't be intruded upon here. May I also bring your attention to the guaranteed parking space for any car you may wish to own," interrupted the property agent. This wasn't the first time they'd met, and he was getting fairly impatient over his latest client's continued vacillating over the different places he'd offered. "You...may also wish to know that I am running out of places to recommend, Miss Harrison."

"Right. Well, I'll need to make a decision soon, shan't I?" She turned to Ami. "When are you moving out?"

"Next week."

"Next week!"

"Well, it's the latest I could stretch it, Trudy. We've dithered about for goodness knows how long, now, and you're no closer to making a decision than you were, previously. Seriously, one house a week. The season starts soon, and the last thing you really want is to move in the middle of the season. You never know what happens on moving day."

"I..." Trudy opened her mouth, ready to retort, but Ami made sense. She had spent a lot of time on the decision on moving out of Chromatik's accommodation, but had come no closer to actually moving out than she had when they first embarked on house-hunting. She really just couldn't bring herself to move out; it was a reluctance, to move from somewhere that was active to somewhere that was just...her.

"Miss Coulibaly? Miss Harrison? I'm afraid our time is up. Shall we assume you will contact me when you wish to view another house or make a decision?"

'That'd be great," Ami answered on behalf of Trudy, who merely nodded meekly. They got up, and began walking to the door; but the property agent motioned to Ami, who obliged by moving closer to the agent.

"Miss Coulibaly, as I said earlier, I've got...not very many houses left to show."

"I get that. I'm sorry, Colby, she's just taking a lot of time right now. Moving out's difficult for her..."

"I understand, of course, but I also have a lot of other clients who are very interested in this particular property. So..."

"Yeah, I get what you mean. Thanks, Colby, as always. You're a gem." Ami nodded as she stepped out to catch up with Trudy.

Chromia, but in a cafe

"Property agent told me there are lots of people waiting to view the house, Trudy. So what'll the decision be?" They'd been walking in silence for a while, appreciating the rare Chromatik summer sunshine; in a country that was cold even by Tumbran standards, sun was appreciated. Their bright rays now filed through the windows of the cafe Ami and Trudy were sitting in; they'd decided to take a break to relax.

"I don't know, Ami, I really just...ugh. I don't want to live alone, but I do want to have my own space," Trudy said, looking more pensive. "I'm sorry for taking this long. Really, this is a lot of trouble I'm making you go through."

"Nah. What are friends for? And I get it. Could always consider rooming with someone new. Or with someone established, even. Doubt Kattie would turn you down," she said with a mischievous grin.

"Kattie? I'd hate to intrude on her private life. She's got a kid and everything, doesn't she?"

"Okay, if not her, then how about the others?"

"The others? I'd hate to...impose...on them..." Trudy took a sip.

"Okaaaay, then how about someone new? Tania? She looked pretty lost. Felswyr's about as far from Chromia as you can get. Drarinka, from Lanar?"

"Too old..."

Ami sighed. "Lilli, the new left winger?"

"Too intimidating."

"Too int—Trudy Harrison, you're not seriously going to tell me that you, someone who literally shouts instead of talks every moment she's on the pitch, and one of the highest-rated defensive midfielders in Chromatika, are intimidated? By a new left winger? Plus, she's like, tiny."

"Back in Kingsbury we had a phrase for these kinds of players," Trudy smiled. "Different gravy. That's what she is. Plus, she's from Nephara. That's the bit that makes her intimidating."

"Well, then I'm officially out of options, Trudy," Ami exasperatedly threw up her hands. "Bit strange wanting someone to live with and then rejecting every candidate possible."

"I'm sorry. It's just that..."

"You're a lone wolf, that's what."

"What?"

"I said what I said. You're so used to living by yourself that you're too scared to try living with other people. Even if living alone makes you lonely. You gotta make a choice." Ami said, a worried frown on her face. "Live alone, and be lonely, but be satisfied as much as a lonely person can be, or live with someone else, and be known."

"Be...known?"

"Yeah. Be known by other people. Break down that tough, external wall you like to put up. Maybe let people know who you truly are." Trudy visibly winced at that last part. "Is...everything okay?'

"Yeah."

"So unless you've got someone you've known for a long time in this country, and they're willing to move in with you, then..." Ami's eyes widened, voice trailing off as she suddenly began scrolling through her phone. Trudy's noticed it, and instantly a sense of panic overtook her.

"Ami. What's going on."

"An extra room. Someone you've known for a long time. Not ringing any bells?" she said, while still scrolling.

And suddenly, the connections lit up, and Trudy's eyes widened, as well.

"No. No. Nonononono. Ami, you are not seriously thinking of —"

"Oh, but I am," she grinned. "You finally found out who I was thinking about. Took you long enough."

"I can't move in with him!" Trudy hissed. "Things would be so awkward, plus there's the fact that he's — well, he's a boy —"

"Let's face it — things can't possibly get worse than they are right now. And, who knows? Maybe this'll help things get less awkward. He won't turn you down. I guarantee it."

"He's a boy, and I'm a girl — the toilet situation —" Trudy started sputtering, the thought of living with Stephen making her brain go haywire —

"The solution's very simple. His house has two toilets, probably. Most definitely. Most houses do. Just get him to give you the room with the attached toilet. Or just force him to use only the toilet in his room. No stupid accidents."

"I-no-can't—" Deep down, again, Ami was making sense, but Trudy just couldn't handle Ami just straight-up saying it. Yes, Stephen would be a great house-mate, and Ami's suggestions to her problems were blindingly obvious solutions, too. Stephen wouldn't say no...

"You know I'm right. C'mon, Trudy, he knows you. He's willing to adjust his way of life for you, because quite frankly, before he ghosted you, he was possibly the sweetest person I'd ever met. Up there with my significant other, even. And I think he wants to make it up to you, too. Y'know, for staying away from you."

"Really?" She tried to mask it, but a sense of hope was making its way into Trudy's voice. To be able to talk to Stephen again...

"Why don't you text him? I'm almost certain he'd say yes."

Gingerly, reluctantly, apprehensively, Trudy took her own phone from her pocket, and began composing a message...

Chromia, but in Stephen Kerr's house

The late afternoon rays of sunshine were situated at an angle that, for Stephen Kerr, made watching television uncomfortable. Draped on the sofa, air-conditioning on full blast, he was simply enjoying and basking in the sunshine before he'd go out and have an evening run; but the rich yellow light from the floor-to-ceiling windows were making it difficult to watch.

He grunted, pulling himself out of his lying position, and turned off the television. It was all reruns on TBC World, anyway, and he wanted to stretch. Carefully making sure to not upset anything on the coffee table, he yawned as he got up, and raised his arms above his head. A cup of water awaited, but before he trudged to the refrigerator, he heard the jarring noise of a phone vibrating against glass.

Who could it possibly be? It was a weekend. Pretty much everyone in Tumbra was asleep. Cande, knowing him, was probably at the gym. Kamil didn't message people that often, and their relationship was more of a professional one than a personal one. He grabbed a glass, and was about to start dispensing water, when the phone buzzed again.

Fine, the water could wait.

He dragged himself back over to where his phone was, and picked it up; and immediately was shaken out of his semi-asleep stupor.

Trudy
Typing...
hey. uh, this seems pretty shocking and on very short notice, but
i'm looking for a place to live.
and like, i really don't wanna live alone
you've got an extra room, and so i was thinking
maybe i could move in? i'll help pay for rent and everything, uh, and like,
yEAH
*yeah
Yeah sure, of course. You don't need to pay rent, or anything. Lmao
Just let me know when you wanna move in.

The words escaped his fingers and were sent into the ether of cyberspace before he'd even had a chance to consider what he was signing up for. Why was she asking to move in? She seemed pretty happy at Chromatik's accommodation. The lingering questions he had, however, were quickly deafened by the surge of happiness that was coursing through his body; overjoyed, really, that Trudy was talking to him again.

It didn't hit him until his head hit his pillow that night that Trudy moving in would mean his life was probably going to get turned upside-down. Again.

National Team Selections for MD2 vs Starblaydia and MD3 @ Alezian Union
Goalkeepers: 1 - John Lennon, 12 - Nick Barker, 13 - Frank Johnson
Defenders: 2 - Ryan Hughes, 3 - Nigel Harris, 4 - Ian Ashburn, 5 - Harry Henderson, 14 - Stephen Kerr, 18 - Michael Campbell, 19 - Chris Carter, 20 - Douglas Moore
Midfielders: 6 - Vincent Hicks, 8 - Craig McGrath, 10 - Phil Cole, 15 - Trudy Harrison, 23 - Andrew Fisher, 38 - Leo Hooper
Wingers: 7 - George Hilton, 9 - Robin Vaughn, 21 - Lynne Crossley, 30 - Valerie Wells
Strikers: 11 - Nick Riordan, 22 - Nigel Erskine

World Cup 90--RP Thread

BVC News: 16th January 2022

WC90Q MD1 Cutoff

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