World Cup 84- RP Thread (IC)

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Civil Rights Lovefest

Postby Kita-Hinode » Mon Jan 20, 2020 2:28 pm

Hinodejin Empire 2, Valanora 1: Ikki meets World
Written by sports journalist Nanako Ichigo.

Some would say that a game can be resumed by its' scoreline. But I honestly don't think that's fair to Ikki Tokei. Now, in all fairness, we all knew Tokei would be a major talent after his amazing displays for both Mashu Elite High School and Mido-Hinode University and even when some were at least somewhat confused once he signed up for Olympia Borograd instead of waiting up for another contract (his reasoning of "I wanna play, they came to me first" being rather obtuse to Hinodejin patterns of thought), I myself knew that the team from the land of the Teus had just lucked out, getting themselves a major talent.

With Raiden Kojima sitting out of the match after an incident with his high-vibration sword and some Cassadaiguan official's hair, Somporn Metharom found himself playing his first-ever World Cup match in a bit of a rush as a left-back, one position that he (surprisingly) isn't familiar with that much. Why did they not use Constanze Schultheiss? Well, they did but Eleanor Lindgard wished to use that one player with a lot of hype that the Hinodejin knew to be possibly one of their best ever. If anyone even had a sliver of doubt over the talented offensive midfielder, the fact that his first touch of the ball led to him flipping it over the head of the well-established player Espy va Drake should be enough proof that Ikki Tokei didn't come to this World Cup to be overshadowed.

Tokei ended up dazzling the full-packed crowds, often rising a finger to the sky after, eventually, losing a ball from being too busy dribbling over players instead of passing it around. Eventually, such mistakes did end up giving Valanora a chance to score which they, unsurprisingly, made the most of with a long, quality screamer from Thor Møller that found the back of the net to an uncredulous Myozan Namezono. With the score already one down for the Vanorians, the duo of Choji Matsumono-Gide and Ikki Tokei had a brief talk in the middle of the field, winked to each other and thus, their fate was signed.

Juri Kisame crossed the ball over the field to Choji Matsumono-Gide. The Black Panther bolted down the wing, passing it to Somporn Metharom in order to lose out a Vanorian marker. Metharom lobbed it back to Choji, who nutmegged a second marker before passing it to Tokei. Tokei locked the ball between his legs and leaped over the sliding tackle from Thor Møller before back heeling it to Choji. Choji replied with a great flip, knocking the ball past Eivind Strømmen's left. Before Iben Fjørtoft's attempt to reach the ball found a home, however, Ikki Tokei could be seen blasting past Sean Smørdal, tying the game with precision. Three minutes. It was all the Hinodejin needed to take a tie.

With time soon ticking down to signal the end of the first half, the Hinodejin were granted a corner kick. Juri Kisame crossed it inside the box, the ball riveted past Hinodejin and Vanorian players alike, struggling to find itself a pair of feet that could land a touch. Another newbie to the World Cup decided to make his mark. Luís Costa, full of all sorts of mental baggage seemed to forget everything when he managed to lay a foot against the leather of the ball. For a second, all sorts of problems weren't in his head anymore. The pressure of playing for a nation that, arguably, dominated his former homeland (even if it was in a defensive conflict) faded away with that shot. While his old stomping grounds are rebuilt with strong Hinodejin help, he was now the first-ever Dreamplanetian to score a goal in a World Cup with a banger to the bottom right of the goal.

The entirety of the team celebrated alongside him, even Myozan Namezono who had bolted from the goal to maybe try and head it in managed to find himself in the goal picture, arms placed over the shoulders of Tokei and Matsumono-Gide while Luís Silva seemed to admire the number of people on the crowd and the feeling of scoring in a World Cup. Miguel Benedito was still on the air after jumping to approach his compatriot while Cherry Whitecastle twirled to the side. Somporn Metharon, Eichi Fujiwara and Frederic van Brabant were caught running from the back, Iori Saitou was found looking at the ball with a smile while Kisame was apparently taunting some Vanorian that got in her way.

With another half of play, the Hinodejin mostly kept things cool while Ikki Tokei spent most of the time trying to be as flashy as possible. Hard to get in trouble when you're doing that as you're winning after all. In the end, the Hinodejin clawed three points. They're now looking forward to their next match against the always interesting 95X, hoping to play against the Eurans without any issues regarding qualification to the next round.

HINODEJIN EMPIRE 2 - Namezono; Kisame, van Brabant, Fujiwara (Simishi 81'), Metharom; Matsumono-Gide, Miguel Benedito (Sakata 85'), Tokei; Luís Silva, Saitou [c], Whitecastle (Mutsuga 81')
VALANORA 1 - Smørdal; Fjørtoft, Strømmen, Salverda; va Drake, Hatsune (Gundersen 55'), Hawk, Lithvathar (Larsen 87'), Soldarian (Möller 87'); Nygård, Møller
ESF - Møller 24'
HIN - Tokei 27' (assisted by Matsumono-Gide), Luís Silva 40' (assisted by Kisame)
Let the sun burn my eyes / Let it burn my back
At the beach / In my dreams / But you still
Champion: WC 75 and 76, CoH 74, U-15 WC 4 and 6, DBC 29 and 41, CE 21 and 24

The IC follow-up to Northern Sunrise Islands / Demonym: Hinodejin (singular, plural)

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Postby Cassadaigua » Mon Jan 20, 2020 4:38 pm

Playing at Home,
by Hannah Ranucci, Captain

There are not many players out there that will have the opportunity to play in the World Cup on their home soil. For the vast majority, qualifying for the World Cup is the closest that they will ever get to it. When I played in my first World Cup back in number 78, I was simply grateful to be able to represent my country. Then, the opportunities got better as we qualified for the World Cup, and recently have made it to the quarterfinals. This has increased expectations for this team, and now with the chance to play at home, I can say that I am thankful for what the good Lord has provided me over the course of my career. Fortunately, there are only two years between World Cups in Cassadaigua, so that has allowed me to play in many games along the way. At 33 years of age now, I am prepared to walk away from the international team at the conclusion of this World Cup. Being able to lift the World Cup in Concord Heights is a reality in that it is possible, but there is a lot of work that needs to be done.

Maybe there is good luck in the number 33. It is my age, of course, but it is also my jersey number as you all know, too. I picked #33 actually because at the time, #22 was taken. My preference then would have been #22, and I have always preferred a number that has each digit be the same. Maybe I am just weird like that, I was #11 in high school, but on the national team #11 is not an option for anyone after the great Courtney Ferguson, the first ever captain of a Cassadagan national team, wore the number. Once I established myself with the #33, I never wanted to wear another number. It was now my identity, and I was happy with it. So now, this 33 year old wearing #33 is hungry, but that number shows up again. It has been 33 Cups since out last World Cup win. Coming in #51. With all those 33's, there is no doubting that we have the highest #33-index in the World Cup.

To turn the mood into a more disappointing one, this blog does have to come after a 1-0 loss to Turori, our continued nemesis. In World Cup 82, they were the one who eliminated us in the quarterfinal. As a nation, despite having some success against Vilita, we have never defeated Turori. Race fans are accustomed to seeing those nations running as a combine entity, so that’s why in my mind an in many others here, we associate them so closely. I want to apologize to everyone for losing this game. Playing in Concord Heights at the beautiful Dagan Airways Stadium to open this World Cup and not getting a point out of this game, at least, probably ruined the day for many of you. As a team, we know what this loss means to us. Turori is a good team, and losing to them in itself is never something to be ashamed of, but given the situation, it is just not the result we wanted. We’re going to Brattleboro now, to play Chromatika, a nation we have had success against, and we will need for that to continue, or else. Well, we don’t really want to think about that alternative right now. Let’s get this going back in the right direction! Our minds are in the right place, don’t worry about that.
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(Motorsports, college basketball, and volleyball, too)

Specific Titles: World Cup 50, 51; WBC 14, 16, 19 & 50; WB 8, 22, & 40; WCOH 11 & 39; IBC 13.
Also: CoH 39; Swamp Soccer 4, WVE (Vball) 6; NSCAA 3, 5 & 9; NSSCRA 7
Runner Up: CoH 40, WB 21, WcoH 8, IBC 12, WBC 13, 15, 47 & 48, DBC 21. 3rd Place @ WC 86
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Postby Brenecia » Mon Jan 20, 2020 4:52 pm

Brenecia 1 - 0 South Covello
(4-3-3) 1 - Farrell; 18 - Lonergan, 5 - Horgan, 6 - Mathers, 3 - Quill (c); 8 - Matheson (14 - Ruskin 65'), 23 - Fallon, 13 - Wheeler (21 - Parker 84'); 7 - Cheney, 9 - Ciogach (17 - Lindauer 72'), 11 - Keynes
Goal: Cheney 49'

Lauren Cheney took a moment to preen. Damn, she looked good. A pixie cut, initially given a navy blue wash then primped up with frosted tips meant nobody could avoid seeing her out on the pitch, and that was just how she liked it. The rehabilitated former dictatorship of South Covello was one of those strange, unpredictable nations whose players you never saw outside of World Cups, but they were still a known quantity, and many neutrals weren't giving Brenecia a ghost of a chance. But did they have Lauren Cheney on their side? No, they did not.
Her assigned roommate, Keane Mathers, poked his head into the mirror's frame. "You look like a shag out on a bar crawl," he contributed.
"Fuck yourself," retorted Cheney. "I look like I'm gonna go out and flick dicks, which is exactly what's gonna happen out there."
"Careful not to buy your own hype. I know your agent's trying to get you a fat contract out in the Goldleague-"
"Trying? Shit, I'm fighting them off with a stick." She ran a hand through her hair, and felt satisfied with the way it whipped back. She was more than ready for this. She was going to tear it up on the world stage.

South Covello were a stultifyingly defensive side. That would have presented an issue for Brenecia, who were at their best on the counter, attacking space that would not exist... except that Brelk-Xeral Erv was entirely happy to take a point. The squad selection called the Covellan bluff, with the muscle of Keynes and the defensive aptitude of Lonergan favoured. Now the impetus lay with the Covellans.
Nothing happened as the game found its rhythm, with not so much as a shot in anger fired until Cantwell was hacked down just outside the box, Lonzo Gordon stepped up for the set piece and drilled it hard at goal, Cass Farrell springing early and with distance to claw the ball onto the post and Mathers acting quickest to hoof it clear.
Cheney waited, tapping her foot, for a chance to shine. Once or twice the ball threatened to come her way; Keynes battled his way free of markers, bruised his way clear, just about beat Paul to the punch to hoof the ball into the box... it overshot Ciogach, undershot Cheney, and Yachtwood hoofed it into space on the full.
Another chance, again won by the bruising Keynes, was ever-so-near. Quill put it to his feet and the Lajuno winger spun past Paul, seeing Ciogach run down the middle and Cheney race to the far post and slung a low, diagonal cross to hit either of them just as they'd rehearsed. Woodward threw his body in the way, and got a knee onto it, which looped the ball farcically over Ciogach's head and left Cheney to make a sharp, veering turn into the ball's path and just... why wouldn't it fall for her? All she could do was direct a neat header lacking in power towards but not quite far enough into the top corner, and Matthew Tyler sprung into action to tip it over the bar. The corner came to Horgan, who smashed a header into the crossbar.
But 0-0 was still fine. And at the other end, Cass Farrell had been fed a diet of long shots that she was more than capable of handling.

Brelk-Xeral... probably said some things in the dressing room, Cheney figured, but her mind was elsewhere. She needed the space to clear her mind, rejuvenate herself, visualise exactly how she was going to score now that she knew the pitch and knew the opposition and knew where the fans were sitting. She didn't need to hear about how 'we go again' or, like, tactical instructions. She knew what she was about, the damage she could do. Would do. Yeah.
It would be simple. Corby Wheeler would wriggle free of her marks in the centre. She'd look to either side. She'd drill the ball left to Keynes, Keynes would beast Paul yet again. He'd fire the ball central to Ciogach who, presented with a wall of meat, would lay the ball back to Matheson, leaving Cheney restless and unfulfilled. Matheson back to Quill, overlapping down the left and running clear and Quill arrowing in a long ball to Cheney's chest level, a little away from her body, but no matter, she'd flick out a boot and trap it, sending it bouncing gently and tamely at her feet, feint left as Hauer came across then using that height to flick it outside of him, drag it back inside, and with the defence still racing back into position after being hauled out to Brenecia's left, find the bottom corner with nerves of steel and the confidence of a true two-footed player. And then race into the active support, hurdling the hoardings, submerging herself in the mob, soaking in the adulation that was, frankly, her right. People ruffled her hair, someone kissed her. She was Lauren Cheney, damn it! She was the star, and she could still make herself a legend!
"Alright, let's go back out there!" barked Brelk-Xeral, jolting Cheney back into the real world. "Let's fucking win!"

Four minutes later, a sharp sequence of passes around the left flank left Gethin Quill free to find Cheney, who had been left to lurk in space. She flicked the ball outside Hauer then cut back inside to fire across Tyler. She waded into the crowd, and only with reluctance did they spit her back out onto the pitch. Eventually.
The rest of the match was dull as anything, and that suited the Patriots just fine. Brelk-Xeral would have settled for a point. He wasn't about to throw away three.
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Postby Zwangzug » Mon Jan 20, 2020 6:21 pm

"Mayumi Tanaka, Merano Regency. Are there any positives you can take from this game?"

"Well, uh, I think the...defense was by and large consistent, and Kukiseso created some good opportunities," said Maclaurin.

"Randeep Singh, Guariday Guardian. Do you plan any changes to the lineup for Matchday Two?"

"Not at this time, although of course it'll depend upon fitness on the day."

"Jeffrey Terrapin, Arlington Moon-Tribune. What does it say about a team like HUElavia that they come back in the ninety-fourth minute? I mean, the nation's first game in the World Cup proper, that's quite a debut."

"Well, look, there have been a variety of cross-league studies showing that scoring opportunities are more common later in the game, with defensive players' tiring generally proving more significant. I don't think you can make generalizations about a team like HUElavia. Even we have had our share of late goals, it's just that most games aren't on such a big stage." Allison's late goal against Gopnikea at the end of the qualifiers had been basically meaningless, but someone like Sydney...He needed to talk with Sydney, he knew, at some point. Or they'd just crash out after the next two games and she wouldn't really be his problem.

"Patrick O'Meara, Hope City Herald. You're a historian of the game, how do Los Amarillos compare to other notable sides?"

"Well, uh, they're not the only squad famous for being named 'the yellows' in their local language, Karela Lines of Rejistania are actually synonymous. Not much of a cognate, mind you."

"Catrina Murray-Tam, Bassabook Baritone. How has the transfer window affected these players' mentality?"

"I...don't really think it has, obviously we're happy for Laurel and Akhil's new opportunities and wish them all the best."

"I totally called it about Sibal, by the way."


"Um, I'm Naomi Clarkson, and I'm, um, a blogger? And I was curious if you've seen Jeremy Jaffacake's latest videography?"

"I'm a little behind at the moment, we're quite busy right now."

"Oh. Only he mentioned that there could be a feature about any of hundreds of noteworthy teams, everyone's history is bizarre in a noteworthy way."

"I entirely agree. What else was the episode about?"

"Uh, Bonesea, and how they're, you know, good. Like they never lost by a lot in a WCC-sanctioned match? And their name doesn't have too many, uh, weird consonants."

"That's rather subjective."

"Well, they quantified it."

"I see."

"And they came up with the Galacticos, I guess you know about that?"


"Anyway. Bonesea are kind of culturally similar to Wight, who uh..."

"Also hosted a World Cup, I believe. Alongside New Montreal States."

"Well, yeah. But they also..."

"Had a pleasantly monochromatic flag?"

"Absolutely. But then, they..."


"Their history, it's kind of, um. You know. Obscure."

How much did Clarkson know about the Collective? About Level Zero? He was the interim coach for a team that had just been upset in their first game of the proper, Maclaurin reminded himself. That was plenty for one day, at his age. "I would agree with that."

"It's just--if you're putting that kind of, uh, achievement up on a pedestal, isn't it kind of an empty cliche to talk about how everybody's history matters?"

Maclaurin exhaled. Maybe this was an opportunity, in its own way. "Ms. Clarkson, I'd be happy to discuss this with your, uh, publication in greater detail at another time, but I'd prefer to get caught up on footage of the Farfadillis-Banija match at this moment."

"Huh," said Naomi. "Okay. Uh, thanks for your time."
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Postby HUElavia » Mon Jan 20, 2020 6:29 pm

HUElavia Game 2 Intro

No, you weren't dreaming. Yes, you actually witnessed sporting history. Our Amarillos upset Zwangzug in their inaugural match in the World Cup. All thanks to the last-gasp goal of a young 16 year old talent named Marc Navarro. Yes, you saw us set a name for ourselves in the Multiverse's largest and most prestigious sporting tournament.

What's our reward for this? Facing off against the reigning Bronze Medalist from World Cup 83, Banija. The same Banija that was surprisingly defeated by a late goal the other day. The same Banija ranked #3 in the World. How's that for a test for Los Amarillos?

Even if we don't match the talent and skill of Banija, we still have a lot of grit and bravado. Tonight, there is a simple message for our squad: "Get a point, and we could be seeing ourselves play in the Knockouts." Although, if we want to be ambitious, "win and you're in." 90 minutes separates us from making history in Football. Tonight, we play not just for the country, but to show the world that we mean business and that we're here to stay.

It's time to support these men and women that have given us joy throughout this cycle.

It's time to go out there and give it our best.

Game 2: HUElavia vs Banija.
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Postby Valanora » Mon Jan 20, 2020 6:37 pm

Those left in the wake of the mistakes are the ones left to bear its burdens, even when those committed the mistakes flee elsewhere. Yet in the international game, in the spotlight of the World Cup Finals, there is nowhere one can flee to when the mistake is made and the entire world and stadium have their eyes cast upon you. All those eyes feel like little daggers digging not only into your flesh but also your confidence, it shakes the morale of a player to blunder in such huge a circumstance. Mistakes made in the Finals are magnified a thousand times, more than any mistake in the Qualifiers or domestic football could be, with so much riding on the line in each and every match. Every mistake that costs your team is a tarnishment to your name that lingers above you like a dark cloud, one that could mask your vision and keep you from progressing forward. Bigger still was the blunder of an entire team, one that could derail their Finals before it ever truly began, a situation that the Marauders unfortunately now found themselves in after stumbling out of the starting blocks to be undid by childish tricks of the Kita-Hinode squad.

Perhaps it was the weight of expectation, the burden that comes with the five stars adorning their crest and the kit that they wore, with over a century of history of success and being one of the most dominant teams in World Football. Perhaps it was the ranking of eighth and being marked as the second strongest team in a group that contained what normally would be two first seeds and and second seed in it. While sixteenth was still twice as much as their own eighth placed ranking, it was one that in a normal tournament would have seen Kita-Hinode be marked as a second seed instead of the third seed that they were, making the group have not only the top second seed in the tournament but also the third seed. It was in many ways unfair to all the teams in the group, this draw that had seen them placed inside such a difficult, more difficult still for the Marauders who normally would at least have the utmost confidence of beating the fourth seed only to have it be one of their notable bogey teams in 95X, who have a smattering history of upsetting the Marauders in the AOCAF. The only thing that could have made this draw more difficult was getting a stronger first seed, like current region and world champions in Equestria, noted rivals of Starblaydia or The Holy Empire, or regional rival and world number one of Vilita.

Perhaps in getting Eura as their first seed, the weakest first seed thanks to the displacement of seedings with Baker Park's first pot status, was a stroke of fortune among what had otherwise seemed to be poor luck and misfortune in the group. At rank seven, there would be on paper very little difference between the two sides, though recent form would favor the Eurans. Both sides have had their ups and downs in the last few cycles, finding themselves both out of the group stages not that long ago and now finding themselves in a situation where they are both in a place where they need a result to make sure their World Cup dreams continue. A win for Eura will secure their advancement into the round of sixteeen, rendering their match against Kita-Hinode less stressful, as it would be for the group title rather than needing that win to ensure their progression, while it would all but eliminate the Marauders from being able to advance from the group. A draw would keep the Marauders slim hopes alive through the third set of matches in the group stage but the circumstances would definitely favor Kita-Hinode and Eura to be the squads to make it out of the group.

Eura is usually known for a solid defense, an industrious midfield, and an attack that while not overtly flash can score in bunches when it is in fine form, a form which they seem to be in starting this group stage it seems with their five goals pushed past the 95X side in the opening match. However the weakness of a backline who seem a bit unsure of themselves was also made known in that opening encounter, having been split open thrice by our regional rivals despite their defeat. It is fair to say that the Marauders have a potent attack, with the likes of va Drake on the wing and Hawk always playing that force in the middle that can heckle both midfield and defense. Møller has slowly come into his own over the last two years, starting to build upon the potential talent that all the scouts saw from him as a teenager and emerged as a real threat up front for the Marauders. While not a replacement for a striker with the experience and demeanor of Fresco, he has done his work to get better and if he were to find a way to slice up the Eura defense for a goal or two, the team around him should be able to rise to the occasion as well and emerge victorious in a must win game if the search for a sixth title is not to be delayed yet another edition, earlier than most would have hoped or thought possible.
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WC84 - Recycle Time - Level 9 (9-0 v. Maldunia)

Postby Vilita » Mon Jan 20, 2020 6:46 pm


Recycle Time... Back again... Nikkii's Back... Back again... Alright here we are Recycle Time lets do it!

So we're still chasing down some of the most monumental results in the history of the Vilitan National Team. That is, the results where they raised the bar by scoring more goals than they ever had in any prior match. Of course, we're not so subtly taking a much less convoluted page out of the book of Jeremy Jaffacake by calling it a 'goal-a-gami'. Sometimes we get cute and do it as a 'gol-a-gami' instead but it sounds the same one way or the other.

So lets just take a quick minute to review where we are. In their very first World Cup qualifying campaign, the Vilita National Team led by Helmut Vilkaous achieved two results that moved them up on the goal-a-gami scale. A 2-1 victory over Compound Interest moved the Jungle Cats from Level 0 to Level 2 - completely bypassing level 1. Of course, Vilita would eventually score just one goal in a match but it would no longer be a goal-a-gami because Vilita were already at Goals Level 2.

At the end of their very first Qualification Campaign, the Vilitan national Team secured their second ever Goal-a-Gami result advancing to Goals Level 4 with a 4-2 victory over Aserjin. From there the Jungle Cats wouldn't secure another Goal-a-Gami result at the World Cup level until the Qualifiers for World Cup 18 - Five Cycles later. Not only was the exciting 6-4 victory over Lykaia a Goal-a-Gami result that moved Vilita up to Goals Level 6 on the Goal-a-Gami scale but it was also the Highest Scoring Result in the history of the Vilitan National Team with a total of ten goals in the match. In fact, the previous Goal-a-Gami result, a 4-2 victory over Aserjin at the end of World Cup 13 Qualifying was also at the time the highest scoring match in Vilitan World Cup campaign history at just 6 goals. Against Lykaia, Vilita scored that many on their own to overcome the four additional goals scored by their opponents.

So what happened from there? Would it be another Five World Cup Cycles before Vilita could break above Level six and get to eight - another two to keep the streak going? Or would they be able to double up during the World Cup 18 Qualifying Session just as they had during World Cup 13 qualifying to achieve Goal-a-Gami Level-Ups twice in the same campaign.

Vilita [9] - [0] Maldunia

Vilita Goalscorers::
1' Callum Banda
6' Malovar Stokks
14' Serge DuPont
24' Callum Banda
32' Serge DuPont
41' Serge DuPont
53' Ricky Ezis
84' Jürgen Ramzi
90' Umberto Melli
Well there is no point on beating around the bush here, Vilkaous and the Jungle Cats accomplished the task and did so in a big way. Not only did they match their six goal performance against Lykaia - this time without conceding any goals, they breezed through Level 7 on a goal from Ricky Ezis, Jurgen Ramzi got the Vilitans to Level 8 and then finally, to finish off the game, it was midfielder Umberto Melli finishing things off in the 90th minute with Vilita's 9th goal of the match.

The opponent was Maldunia, a nation in their debut World Cup Campaign who had competed in the 4th Baptism of Fire Cup hosted in Vilita & Starblaydia earlier in the Cycle. They advanced to the Quarter Final Round where they would lose 3-2 at the hands of the eventual Baptism of Fire Cup champions Masserat. There wasn't a lot to be heard from Maldunia after World Cup 18, as they would never attempt another campaign but they would find themselves on a page in the annals of World Cup history thanks to their drubbing at the hands of Vilita. Not only was the Jungle Cats 9-0 victory good enough to move Vilita up three levels to Goals Level 9 on the Goal-a-Gami spectrum, the result was also a verified World Cup Scorigami. It was the first time since the first World Cup match was played 18 Cycles Prior that any game had ended with a 9-0 scoreline. Vilita were the first team in history to score at least nine goals in a single match while also shutting out their opposition on the day.

Unlike the gap between their previous goal-a-gami results, five cycles between achieving Goals Level 4 and then getting up to Goals Level 6; it was just 5 match days for the biggest leap yet.


Most Lopsided Results::
Through World Cup 18

9 - 0 V Maldunia [ WC18Q ]
7 - 0 V The Weegies [ U21VI ]
7 - 1 V Oaker [ U21IX ]
6 - 0 V Druida [ U21VI ]
6 - 0 V Balaal [ AOCAF III ]
6 - 1 V Aquiliana [ AOCAF III ]
6 - 1 V Turori [ AOCAF I ]
5 - 0 V Cockbill Street [ U21VII ]
5 - 0 V Artoonia [ WC18F ]
5 - 0 V Chacor [ AOCAF V ]
5 - 0 V Krytenia [ U21V ]
5 - 0 V Pedriana [ AOCAF II ]

In addition to the 9-0 victory over Maldunia being the biggest victory in Jungle Cats history at the World Cup level, it was at the time also their biggest victory in all competitions including the Cup of Harmony, Eagle's Cup, Under 21 World Cup and AOCAF Regional Competitions. As of the conclusion of World Cup 18, even when considering competitions with less parity such as the Under-21 World Cup, the 9-0 victory over Maldunia still stood in a class of its own. The next biggest result in any competition was a 7-0 victory over the Weegies in the 6th Under-21 World Cup competition. Of course, Vilita also had a famous 6-1 win over rivals Turori during the inaugural AOCAF Regional Championships and had even gone on to set a new mark for results in the World Cup Finals with a 5-0 victory over Artoonia during the World Cup 18 Group Stage.

But nothing came close to 9. What the Jungle Cats had achieved was something that had never been accomplished before. Now of course, when they did it there had only been 18 World Cup's played. Now there have been 83. There is a lot more data to look at and perhaps unsurprisingly, there have been other games since then that have resulted in a 9-0 victory. But Vilita and Maldunia will always have the ability to claim they did it first... because they did. While Vilita were the first to win 9-0 in the first 18 World Cup cycles, there would be three additional 9-0 scorelines achieved over the course of the next 18 World Cups bringings the total to four 9-0 victories across 36 World Cups - or once every 9 World Cups.

Somewhat fitting don't you think? Averaging one 9-0 result every 9 World Cups. However the World Cup would grow. Instead of 90 nations entering there would be 180. Instead of 10 games being played per each of those teams in qualification there were 15.

So yes, there would be more 9-0 games. As of now Vilita's accomplishment has been repeated another sixteen times. None of them by Vilita. But we were still first. The best part is my grandfolk Jimmy Kater got a little bit of redemption in that match.

I'm sure I already mentioned how grandfolk Jimmy was perhaps somewhat embarrassingly the goalkeeper of record in the 6-4 victory over Lykaia - the only game in Vilitan' history where the team scored six goals and only won by 2. Luckily the team bailed ole' grandfolk Jimmy out in that game but they wouldn't have to do any of that against Maldunia because it was redemption for Jimmy Kater who got his name in the record books by posting the shutout. Not a terribly difficult or meaningful shutout when the outfielders find the net nine times, but it sure looks better than having conceded four goals.

Now you are probably asking yourself why I am regaling you with tales about my ole' grandfolk Jimmy Kater and how his honor was saved in the historical record due to making ... what 2 saves in a game the team won by nine goals?

Because I have nothing else to talk about.


When I embarked on this journey of research I didn't already know what the answer was. It wasn't a case of like, framing the words around a solution. It just sounded like a neat idea. "Lets find every time the Vilitan National Team scored more goals than they ever had before in a match"

Now you, like me, probably presumed that maybe they would climb the ladder seven or eight times, notching some of the lower numbers off early and then maybe eeking out some of the higher numbers throughout time.

What I think we are all now going to be disappointed to find out is that didn't happen at all. Two games in World Cup 13. Two Games in World Cup 18.


That is the entire history of Vilita breaking its own record for most goals scored in a match during a World Cup campaign. 65 World Cups have come and gone and Vilita have never broken into the double digits. They've never done better than they did on Matchday 11 of World Cup 18 against Maldunia. Not once.

They have had a lot of good results, don't get me wrong. I mean how about 8-2 over The Macabees during the World Cup 83 Finals? We'd ask if it was the most goals scored in a World Cup match before but we know its not because... Jeremy Jaffacake is a jerk and posted for the entire World to re-live how Vilita lost 8-7 to Bedistan during the World Cup 21 Quarter Finals. In fact over the last 10 World Cup cycles, Vilita have scored 8 goals on four different occasions. Yet still never nine. Definitely never 10.

So now we wait. You would think it wouldn't be possible at the World Cup Finals, Yet then you have the 8-2 win over the Macabees to say maybe it could be done.

So I guess we'll just close the book on Goal-a-gami's. I thought it would be fun. Maybe it was. Maybe it wasn't. If Vilita actually manage to score 10 goals in a match during this lifetime, maybe will dust this little book off and revisit once more. Until then, Recycle Time out.

Part 1: viewtopic.php?f=7&t=475859&p=36553641
Part 2: viewtopic.php?p=36557421#p36557421
Part 3: viewtopic.php?p=36642498#p36642498

-¤-¤-¤World Cup 20 Champions¤-¤-¤-¤-¤-¤World Cup 68 Champions¤-¤-¤-
-¤-¤-¤World Cup 77 Champions¤-¤-¤-

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Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Qasden » Mon Jan 20, 2020 7:05 pm

Last edited by Qasden on Mon Jan 20, 2020 7:13 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Sporting Achievements
World Cup Ranking: 67th; KPB: 13.55; Style: -4
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Elite, Episode 8

Postby Drawkland » Mon Jan 20, 2020 7:06 pm

E L I T E ...

If you're not caught up on this whole "Elite Eleven" thing, feel free to read up on the literature ...
A Hint * A Tease * A Story * A Contradiction * A Roster
Episode 1 * Episode 2 * Episode 3 * Episode 4 * Episode 5 * Episode 6
Episode 7

"All I'm saying is that I definitely could've stopped a few of those offensive attacks. I was looking at our defense and cringing, like 'oh my God! there's an open hole! somebody fill it!' for half the match." Sarah Arrowsword rambled on. She downed the rest of the Faulber's Hard Seltzer she was drinking and looked to the drink table for more.

"Sarah, isn't that the second one you drank already?" Cam asked, concerned.

"Are we sure these drinks are free? I can't imagine the bill she's about to rack up ..." Nicole added, watching Sarah wander to back to the table full of various drinks.

"LISTEN!" Sarah shouted as she grabbed another thin can from an ice bucket. "I am not in the mood right now! Frankly, I feel insulted that the Elite Eleven can go out there and act like a bunch of chucklefucks who have never seen a halfway-decent striker in their lives! In fact, when we get back to the mainland I'm taking the train to Metropolon, straight to the Pinnapex, and I'm gonna march into Harvey Flantar's office and slam him against his stupid floor-to-ceiling office window until he lets me back onto the Kick Corps! I've had it! Oh, do you guys want one, by the way?"

"No, I'm good thanks," Cam said. "I'm trying to stay alert so I can absorb all the information the Eleven gives us when they ... hopefully tell us everything when they get here."

"Same, but I think I can handle a couple," Nicole decided. "Grab me one please, Sarah? Any flavor."

"You got it hon."

"I guess I can lay back a bit. Those aren't the worst things to drink," Cam admitted. "But I'm gonna wait until there's some food to eat first. Did they say they were bringing food? Or is it being catered or something?"

"I'm not sure. All Mike told me was to go to this conference room in the hotel they're staying at, and we're here. He said if it has the drink table it's the right one, so it's just a waiting game." Nicole looked at the door again, which she'd done about 80 times since they'd gotten to the room ten minutes ago.

"I've had it with these cryptic assholes, honestly!" Sarah exclaimed, tossing a can of Faulber's to Nicole as she sat down. "If we get teased again with no information tonight I'm gonna give up. Hell, I'll sell my next matchday tickets and go home."

"Did she get something to drink at the stadium without us realizing?" Cam asked Nicole, concerned.

"I dunno," Nicole replied, popping the tab on her drink. "Too late now, I guess. Her dad's a dumbass though so I'm sure her genes are well-equipped to handling some alcohol."

"I just feel like I'm gonna have to hold her back once they get here. Any update on them by the way?"

"Not yet. I-" Nicole's phone, as if on cue, began to buzz. "Oh, there he is now. Let's see." The other two quieted down as Nicole brought her phone up to reply.

"Hey Mike! Where are you guys? ... Oh, that's great news! ... Yeah, we're in the conference room. Sarah already started helping herself to the seltzer. Is that a local brand? ... Gotcha, gotcha. Is there gonna be food? There isn't - yeah, there's none here yet. ... Thank God, we're starving. ... Okay ... Okay! See you soon! ... Heh, yeah, you too. Bye!"

"So what's the deal?" Cam asked once Nicole hung up her phone.

"Okay, Mike says that they're probably ten minutes out, and they timed the delivery to get there at the same time they do. They got pizza or something. They're gonna bring it in."


About 20 minutes later, the boys had all arrived. It wasn't an excessively celebratory mood, considering they had just lost the match. But hey, only losing by a goal and scoring 3 against the top team in the group on literal home soil isn't something to be sad about, especially as the bottom pot team. The food was laid out as promised and everybody took a seat at the conference table in the center of the room.

As the greetings and various chitchat about the match slowed down, Cam raised her voice a bit to cut above everyone. "I'm sorry to interject, but we all know why we are gathered here. I think we should get down to business before the night grows too old." There were various murmurs of assent, and a couple guys downed what they were drinking and stood to get another. A few moments later, everyone had settled down at their seats.

There was a tense moment of silence, followed by a few awkward chuckles. Jaxon Madison was the first to speak up.

"Heh, this is a little weird for us. We've never had to do this before, like we said the other night. It's kinda hard to think of a starting point." The trio of girls sitting next to each other all nodded in understanding.

"Well, perhaps you could start with why you decided to do it at all," Cam suggested. "Trying to become immortal isn't exactly a common thing people try to do."

"Good point," said Jaxon, and a few others vocally agreed.

"I think it started as a joke, really. You know, back in the day, we weren't the Elite Eleven. There was like, what, 30 of us back then?" Roger Apollo suggested.

"It was 31 exactly," Jaxon stated definitively. "I can't forget the original squad."

"What happened to them?" asked Nicole carefully.

"We'll ... get to that later," replied Nicholas Kingston. The words hung in the air a beat too long before somebody else spoke up.

"Roger's right. The concept started as a joke. One of the guys from the old squad had just suffered this awful ACL injury. This was back in the day, too, so that was pretty much curtains on his career. We were on a train ride to our next exhibition talking it over. He was gonna just be our on-field manager until he got better or something ... but we were in our 40's by then. Most Drawkian athletes at that time were retiring. To be fair, the level of competition wasn't as fierce as it was today, but it was still dangerous to play into your 50's. Somebody just floated it as a joke ... 'hey, if only we were immortal, like the Drawkionels. You know the likes of Iarocav and Ellzidan are still kicking today. What if we did that?' And yeah, it was just a joke then. But it stuck in our heads, anyway.

"That was a couple years before we decided to nearly retire. By then though, we had kept bringing it up time and time again. It wasn't long until somebody seriously suggested it as an option. We thought long and hard and decided why not? After all, sports had been our livelihood for pretty much our entire lives. Now that we were too old to reliably do it anymore, we were running out of ideas. And this was back in the steam era, so our options were either working some factory job, maybe a farm somewhere, or trying to open some store or restaurant. Yeah, it could work ... but you know we're adrenaline junkies. Thrillseekers. The concept of being able to go on some cool adventure like you'd read in a book was so enticing. We decided we were gonna do it. For real.

"Of course, the best way to learn how to do something is ask those that have done it already. We jumped at the chance when we ran an exhibition game against the Sadeg State football team, and knew Iarocav was gonna be there. We asked to meet with him over dinner. Well, the eleven of us here did. The others didn't take it so seriously. Most of them just went out and got piss drunk with the State team. His advice was very useful ... he was really respectful and relayed his tale to us after we finished up the dinner. Both he and Meliauden explained the process they had to go through the times they did it. The labrynth and everything. I think somebody even wrote literal notes. Who was that?"

"That was me," Elias Keys waved his hand.

"Right, Eli did. Anyway, it wasn't long before we tried asking other Drawkionels. Most didn't care to meet us. It's well known Iarocav is the sporty one ... the rest didn't feel the need to respond to the nagging questions of some random jocks, and that's understandable. As scary as the prospect was, we all went to visit Ellzidan at Elstrund itself. In all our sporting travels, we'd never been there. We figured that since Ellzidan was an athlete herself, maybe she'd be more willing to listen to us, right? By now the rest of the squad were on board, in at least some capacity.

"We made our way to the massive tree, Elstrund. I'm assuming you guys have been there before, but wow. It's a sight that you never forget. We weren't technically invited, nor did we say we were coming ... it's hard to get word out there, especially then when things like the telephone were still trying to become widespread. Once we got to the foot of the tree we went to the area where the Roots field is. It was open, no fencing or anything, so we just decided to play a game of pickup. We assumed somebody would come to stop us at least and we could request an audience with Ellzidan then.

"So we started this game of pickup, and eventually some locals dropped by and joined us. It was a fun time, just us and some strangers. We were playing for maybe an hour, until we realized that the elf herself was literally already playing with us. She had been there for at least a half hour already, and we just never put two and two together. So as play puttered down the lot of us came up to her and introduced ourselves. Of course, she asked us why we had the audacity to show up to her tree without an invitation, and we told her we needed her help. We were going to take the Undying Quest, as it's called, and knew she could help.

"She just looked at us for a moment and then smirked a bit. 'No.' And then she walked away into the tree."

to be continued ...
Last edited by Drawkland on Mon Jan 20, 2020 7:17 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Capitalist Paradise

Postby Cassadaigua » Mon Jan 20, 2020 7:10 pm

And with that, let's cutoff MD2 in Groups E-H.
To get you uplifted, for now, perhaps.

Last edited by Cassadaigua on Mon Jan 20, 2020 7:25 pm, edited 1 time in total.
NS Sports’ only World Cup, World Bowl, World Cup of Hockey, World Baseball Classic and International Basketball Championships winner!

(Motorsports, college basketball, and volleyball, too)

Specific Titles: World Cup 50, 51; WBC 14, 16, 19 & 50; WB 8, 22, & 40; WCOH 11 & 39; IBC 13.
Also: CoH 39; Swamp Soccer 4, WVE (Vball) 6; NSCAA 3, 5 & 9; NSSCRA 7
Runner Up: CoH 40, WB 21, WcoH 8, IBC 12, WBC 13, 15, 47 & 48, DBC 21. 3rd Place @ WC 86
WC Qualified for: 45, 46, 49-61, 67, 79 (DNP WC 69-77), 81-86.
Games of the XIII Summer Olympiad: Second Most Medals
Hosted: World Cup 54, 67 & 84; CoH 57 & 73, BoF 47, CR 30, WB 16, WBC 18, 26, 40, 45 & 50, Some NSCAA, NSCH 1; WLC 7, 30 & 33.

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Civil Rights Lovefest

Postby Audioslavia » Mon Jan 20, 2020 7:48 pm

EDIT: Between the 4:30 and 5:20 mark the video contains lots of moving text and is a bit difficult to watch. In general, this episode is much jerkier than the others. Sorry! To avoid motion sickness, don't watch in fullscreen mode.

The only subtitles for this episode right now are YouTube's automated ones.

All videos are and will remain Unlisted on YouTube. The only way to find them is through links on the NS Sport forum.

I have not monetised any of The Idiot Project videos. If you see an advert, it is because YouTube puts adverts on videos with copyrighted music. The Idiot Project is strictly non-profit.

For the sake of keeping the making of The Idiot Project a secret, permission to reproduce works of various NS users was not sought. If you see your own work in a video and would like it blurred out, please get in touch.

The Idiot Project is a personal project by Audio, who is an idiot, and is not officially affiliated with in any way.

The Ridiculousness database will be made publicly available after the conclusion of this series.

Chapter 3

You’re watching the opening ceremony of the 2006 FIFA World Cup. RL States’s version of World Cup 18. It is as an opening ceremony for a major tournament should be. Utterly ridiculous.

But is this RL States Opening Ceremony more ridiculous, or less ridiculous, than the average Nationstates World Cup opening ceremony? Yes or no?

Well, that’s what split-screen television technology was invented for.

RL States’s World Cup 18 coincided with NS World Cups 29 and 30, and the popularity of the former had a knock-on effect for the latter. With 122 entrants, World Cups 29 and 30 smashed all previous participation records. That 122 figure wouldn’t be broken until cycle 47.

Some of the nations here are veterans entering their fifteenth championship. Some will appear in the future under new names and flags. One won’t play another World Cup until cycle 84. Many, though, are new nations. Bright-eyed and bushy-tailed and eager for a taste of the superior NS version of the World Cup.

The tide of new nations crashed hard against the established order, and quickly fell back into the abyss. Many of the upper echelons of the Ridiculousness table played their football in this post World Cup 30 era. A time dominated by a few established nations that ran roughshod over the rest of the sporting world.

The first team to attain a level of 1 ridiculous - one full ridicule - is from this era.
The Colony of Delaware played its football in World Cup 30, a replacement for ‘Garfield the Fat’, who surprisingly enough clocks in over a thousand places lower.

They lie in 144th place in terms of ridiculousness. Gross. None of the teams below them managed to get to one full level of ridiculousness, no matter how hard they tried.

It’s taken over three thousand nations for us to get to this point. It’ll take just over a hundred more to find a team with two points of ridiculousness. Double ridiculousess. The Gold TyGrr.. capital G.. are the first double ridiculous team. Less than 20 places up, ‘The Non-RPing n00b’, a former dependancy of Schiavonia, are triple ridiculous.

There are eight triple-ridiculous nations, including our friends Alotten Bederborg sa Cesky, Everybody Dies and the wonderfully named Click Click Baboon.

Also triple ridiculous are the first team of our Top Ten of Ridiculousness, seen here on this chart. The Y value in this graph shows how often in every cycle the team lost by three goals or more. The X value is their Scrabble Metric.

Ladies and Gentlement, allow me to introduce you to your new favourite team: Their name is BENKONATE.

In their sign-up post, BENKONATE demanded that we learned the names of their star players.

A few posts later on in the sign-up thread, BENKONATE would give us even more information about their team. Let’s have a look.

World Cup veterans The Archregimancy and Qazox tried to give Benkonate a couple of pointers, including not posting their roster in the sign-up thread. Benkonate was only partially grateful.

Over on the far right of the chart, we have our 9th most ridiculous team, from as recent as World Cup 70. UNITED WE STAND123 didn’t post a roster. Here it is. This is, we assume, their squad for World Cup 70. This is their only roleplay post on the Sports Forum. It’s their squad for a later Runner Cup.

Also entering World Cup 70 is our team in position eight. Their name is HAUAHUHAU. The only roster post available from HAUAHUHAU is their national Handball team. Here it is for posterity. Whoever their football team were, they fared only a little better than UNITED WE STAND123. They’re more ridiculous than UNITED WE STAND123 because when they lost, they did so more spectacularly.

Despite the x3 multiplier, KT MPLG are the only pre-Jolt team in the top ten. This multiplier and their all-caps name screws them a little. They were a reasonably standard team with a run-of-the-mill roster and an array of competent roleplays.

This is the opposite problem to what we had in Chapter 2. A normal team in the top ten. KT MPLG gave a decent account of themselves, and yet couldn’t catch a break. Sorry guys. You probably won’t watch this, but I do apologise for your being on this list.

I don’t like the fact that KT is here but I’m glad 0-0 Is Evil are. You have no idea how annoying they were to the algorithm that trawled for results through the World Cup 24 scores thread. They were, like quite a lot of ridiculous World Cup teams, a puppet of Schiavonia. Knobjockeys. 0-0 is Evil are ridiculous for fielding a team of attackers, each with the name ‘attacker’ translated into various languages. Some more imaginative than others.

Yankees123 are the first team to be more than five-times ridiculous. This is their entire post history. They are the most ridiculous modern-era team. Following them, the absolutely most ridiculous teams all hail from that boom period after the 2006 World Cup.

Of these ten teams, Candy Rocks were beaten heavily the most often. This may be because their participation was limited by outside factors. Candy Rocks left little trace on the World Cup, except for having been given the honour of being the first team since World Cup 7 to play an away game in the Dreamed Realm. One can only imagine what they made of that.

Their 2-1 loss to The Holy Empire was possibly their best achievement of their entire footballing history. No fewer than 11 thrashings were administered to the unlucky outfit.

One cycle later, a team who had no problems joining the World Cup, stumbling blindly into World Cups 32 and 33. Literally

The Great Monty Python sent their blind football team in both cycles.

They did their best with what they had. What they had appeared to amount to a dead parrot or two.

The stupidly named KCToker are number two in this group, before, finally, at the top, a team named J-Man2k7, a wonderfully named football team boasting a talented roster.

My favourite player on this list is probably the guy called ‘Wilkes’, who ‘can bugger off’, apparently, although their backup goalkeeper gets bonus points for being called ‘Ghlarper’

And there you have it. J-Man rounds off the top ten. A shame. They seemed like a decent bunch. If there’s one thing I didn’t want from this episode, it’s to mock a team that seemed nice, and its a shame that that’s what’s happened.

Wait a minute. I thought this was the top ten? No wait, this doesn’t make sense. J-Man with his eight ridiculousness points is at the top. We’ve seen this graph twice up to now… there’s no-one higher than eight points…

What the hell?

Episode 2 Music Playlist. Includes music from chapters 4 and 5, so if you’d like the choice of music to remain a secret, don’t click the link.

Previously on The Idiot Project
Episode One:
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3 (A)
Chapter 3 (B)
Chapter 4
Chapter 4.5
Chapter 5
Chapter 6

Episode Two:
Chapter 1
Chapter 2

Bulls on Corsairs

Marañòn and Kuznetsov were in irresistible form as Audioslavia bounced back from their opening day disappointment to thrash qualifying rivals Sargossa, dumping their opponents out of the tournament and setting up a final-day decider between the Bulls and Siovanija and Teusland.

As with last weekend’s game against the Vilitans, there were three first-half goals that ended the contest before it had even begun. Marañón’s fifth-minute cross found Kuznetsov diving in at the near post to scoop the ball past Roberto Penedo for 1-0.

Marañón would provide the second himself, cutting inside Carlos Carter on the right and sending a looping shot round the keeper for two-nil, before a second penalty of the tournament for Kuznetsov - awarded after Kyran Knudsen tumbled over the outstretched leg of Kyran Knudsen, much to Sargossa’s annoyance - put the game beyond the Corsairs.

Siovanija and Teusland both await the Bulls in a final game in which Thorsten Kramer will hope to prove why 1830 Cathair rate him so highly. It is, once again, a manager that Wilf Lidgley can ill afford to lose. Audioslavia’s defence, who thankfully had a quiet-ish evening against Sargossa, will need to be back on top form if the Bulls are to achieve a draw that would put the side into the knockout stages.

I've been Jeremy Jaffacake, G'nite b<music plays>
Last edited by Audioslavia on Mon Jan 20, 2020 8:13 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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Liberal Democratic Socialists

Postby Recuecn » Mon Jan 20, 2020 7:59 pm

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Democratic Socialists

Postby Chromatika » Mon Jan 20, 2020 8:16 pm

Proper MD1: Chromatika 1–0 Ko-oren
Goals: Armageddon '68
Starting XI (4-2-3-1): Ria; Xiao - de Aea - Will - Ilya; Montague - Armageddon; Victoriane - Mora - Conrad; Andisori (C).
Substitutes: Kelly -> Victoriane ('49), Anderson -> Will ('55), Dias -> Montague ('72)
Projected Lineup vs. Cassadaigua: Ria; McBee - de Aea - Will - Damjana; Montague - Armageddon; Victoriane - Mora - Conrad; Andisori (C).


Jillian Nier, Football Correspondent

Who is Enigma Armageddon?

The One-Eyed Eagle, Field General, Armageddon has been around for a few cycles - and been the understudy to Alyss Montague this qualifying cycle, learning the defensive midfielder position needed in a 4-2-3-1 where the wingers are given all the permission in the world to fly down the wings as often as they want. This means that the defensive midfielders have to coordinate with the back four, and Armageddon has learned that.

He is known among his fellow players as a model citizen who really looks to keep the team together, but he is also capable of the sudden moments of brilliance that every player needs to have to truly succeed at the senior level.

The twenty-three meter cannonball off his left foot to set the Chromatiks to a victory over Ko-oren was a beauty, one that Ko-oren was not expecting.

"I saw a gap between the defenders and the keeper, and knew that I had a chance," he stated to the media afterwards, "We do practice shots, and Mia and have a running wager on how many I get past her. She told me afterwards that that was one that probably she couldn't even block."

The victory propels the Chromatiks to a tie on top the group with Turori, though games against Cassadaigua and Turori, the top two seeds of the group.

Still, it is three points that the team didn't have last time around. The memory of the three-loss group stage is still fresh, but the Chromatiks are one good result away from putting that away.
Former User of the Nations of Yesopalitha and Falconfar

Regional Tournaments: 52 (2nd), 53 (4th), 54 (QF), 55 (Champions), 56 (Ro16), 59 (Ro16), 60 (QF), 61 (4th), 62 (Ro16), 63 (2nd)
WC Proper Appearances: 75 (Ro16), 76 (SF), 77, 78 (QF), 79 (Ro16), 80 (Ro16), 81, 83, 84, 86, 87 (Ro16)
CoH Appearances: 77 (Ro16), 85 (Ro16)
KPB Ranking: 15 (Post 87)
RP Population: 20 million

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Liberal Democratic Socialists

Postby Farfadillis » Mon Jan 20, 2020 8:47 pm

Making the most of a fine cross from his teammate, Edmün chested the ball down and smashed it into the lower-left corner. Some among the small crowd clapped, but they were already used to his brilliance. It was his fifth goal of the day already. Tüý, his uncle, was specially unimpressed.

As Edmün's father was one of those rare Farves who couldn't care less about football, Tüý was the one who took Edmün to practice, and then to the matches. He had played football in the second division - one of the many names forgotten in time, as he was now over fifty. He knew a thing or two about football, certainly enough to know his nephew had a very special gift.

The referee blew the whistle, signalling the end of the match. As usual, Mâ Âlâmëómë had smashed their opponents. 10-0, Çídh had scored half of them. Edmün had perhaps played a little better than usual, but his uncle was not satisfied. He never was.

"Edmün, you played well, but you could've done better." He told him with his calm voice, raspy from many evenings at the local bar.

"I know, uncle Tü. I could've scored at least eight."

"No, no, it wasn't that, kid. Really, there was just one play that caught my attention."

"Which one?"

"The fifth goal. Right after you chested it down, you went for the lower corner, when a good keeper could've probably saved it from that position. If you'd gone for the upper corner, you could've secured the goal. It didn't matter in the end, but against a better opponent, it could."

Dejected from the criticism, Edmün lowered his voice a little. "Ok, uncle. I'll try to do better next time."

"That's my nephew!" He said before rubbing his head, perhaps a bit too brusquely.


"Look, dad! Ed's gonna play!" Lâísà pointed at the television. "Cousin Ed's gonna play."

Tüý picked up his daughter and sat her on his lap. Perhaps a randown bar in the outskirts of Banija wasn't the perfect place to take one's daughter, but Tüý wasn't traditional like that anyway.

"Yes, Lâí, and he's gonna score." He looked at the screen; his nephew was strolling his way to position. "Because daddy taught him how to do it."

"t'Öéséné with the interception. A great pass to Wçêíl. Wçêíl with the crooooss. It's Çídh! ÇÍDH! GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL! Fantastic goal from the young lad! He's chested it down and calmly smashed it into the upper corner, far from the keeper's reach! Farfadillis lead once again!

Tüý smiled, proven right once again.

With half the bar cheering his nephew, and the other half bitter to be behind once again, Tüý decided it was the best possible time to take off his shirt - obviously one of Edmün, and display it for all the bar to see.

"Remember this name, Banijans!" He slid his finger along the letters Ç-Í-D-H arrogantly. "You'll never have a player like this, so just watch and enjoy!"
The Outlandish Lands of Farfadillis Ӿ Population: 20,814,000 ± 11,186,000
Capital: not applicable Ӿ Demonym: Farf, plural Farves Ӿ FFL Results by Season Ӿ How to get any WA Category Ӿ Map of Farfadillis Ӿ Name Generator

Champions: World Cup 84 and AOCAF Cups 43, 48 and 57
Hosts: World Cup 85, Baptisms of Fire 54 and 68 and AOCAF Cups 38 and 60

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WC84MD1 - 1-0 @ Cassadaigua

Postby Turori » Mon Jan 20, 2020 8:51 pm



Eels topple hosts in World Cup 84 Opener

Dagan Airways Stadium, Concord Heights, Cassadaigua :: By virtue of being drawn into the same group as the host nation Cassadaigua, and being the second seeded team in Group A, the Turori National Team were thrust directly into the spotlight to kick off the World Cup 84 Finals with the eyes of the multiverse on the Dagan Airways Stadium for the first game of World Cup 84.

The expectations inside the Matriarchy were as high as they had ever been. The Dagans had finished 4th place in World Cup 83, their best showing since they defeated Valanora to win World Cup 51, the second of their two back-to-back World Cup titles. They were defeated in Equestria and Banija only by the eventual World Cup Champions, Equestria, on their home soil. Now, it was the Cassadaigua National Team playing at their own stadiums, in front of their own fans. With the #1 and #2 teams in the multiverse playing in the other half of the draw, the Dagans were favorites to return back to the Semi-Finals to get another crack at a return to the World Cup Final which would be played at the very same Dagan Airways Stadium in Concord Heights that would be kickstarting the festivities.

Outside the stadium, fans flooded World Cup Village where scores of Dagan and external companies lined the streets in front of Museum Row in Concord Heights selling products, giving away promotional items and trying to recruit new customers. Five Star Mobile were holding hourly giveaways at three different locations in World Cup Village while Cocoa-bo were looking to get a foothold in Concord Heights setting up a giant outdoor cafe with free chocolate top drinks and an option to purchase delectable eateries to enjoy along with the beverages.

While there was plenty to do outside the stadium, and even inside with many of the same companies and shops available on the stadium concourse, as match time approached the seas began to migrate and the pink and black overwhelmed the stadium. A small contingent of Turorian fans from Nigels Army had secured tickets to the game but only the minimum available were issued for the visitors.

The sun was shining bright and the weather perfect as the two sides came out of the tunnel for pre-game festivities. The Turori National Team surprisingly included three Cocoabo players on their reserve roster, Cocoabo #86 as a backup goalkeeper; Cocoabo #46 as a utility player and the attack-minded Cocoabo #91 who recently became the first Cocoabo to ever be transferred to an internationstatal domestic club agreeing a deal with Audioslavian team Oljestaden iF. However, none of the three Cocoabo would come out of the tunnel at the Dagan Airways Stadium. Instead, the Turorian team was comprised entirely of players from its Citizen Squad led by captain Tarek Edgeli and followed by young goalkeeper Timaala Hualtia who perhaps surprisingly got the start over Wiyauw An'maude who recently led Cedniavella Turori to the Vilitan Declasse Championship.

When the match kicked off it was quickly apparent that the Dagans were more concerned about not screwing the game up knowing that a win would put them in great position to advance, but a draw would be nearly as good with two lower ranked opponents still to come. Turori played a solid four across the back in addition to a pair of defensive midfielders in a slightly defensive formation that dominated the early possession in keeping the match slow from the outset. As the opening forty-five minutes wore on, Cassadaigua would begin to generate chances and many thought that Hannah Ranucci had scored in the 38th minute but her close range effort hit the side of the netting before bouncing off a camera post and rolling along the backside of the net giving some on the opposite side of the pitch the false impression that the ball had gone in.

Turori came out with a different look in the second half with three defenders and three defensive midfielders to try to counter the centralized play of the host nation. The Turorian coaches introduced some youthful energy in the form of Yeaddin Owls starlet Kala'a Yuliizala but the changes didn't seem to greatly affect the state of play on the pitch as the scores remained deadlocked.

Things would stay goalless until finally Turori found the right change to catch the Dagans off guard, reverting back to the 4-4-2 formation by removing Mbidai Akarenaa and introducing defender Amakli Inuro'o. The young defender based out of the club Bastion in Eura trotted onto the pitch immediately as Turori were about to play in a corner kick and as if it had been pre-scripted it was Inuro'o, whom hadn't been on the pitch more than 40 seconds, was left unmarked by the Dagan defense and had a free header which they made no mistaking putting past Kelsey Morgan to silence the already nervous home crowd and give Turori a 1-0 lead.

Inuro'o's first ever World Cup Finals goal would ultimately be the difference in the match as the Turori National Team stole a massive three points away from the hosts in a match environment that will likely closely resemble that of the World Cup 84 Final which would be played at the very same venue to conclude World Cup 84. The Turorian players celebrated as the Dagans were left in disbelief that the full time whistle had already blown and there wouldn't be another chance to save a point in the World Cup opener in their own capital city. It was the third consecutive victory for Turori over Cassadaigua including the 2-0 result in the World Cup 82 Quarter Finals - one of just two all time Quarter Final victories for Turori. While the result would leave plenty of work to do for the hosts, they would still be favored to advance from Group A while Turori were now sitting in position to make amends for their group stage exit in World Cup 83 with another run to the World Cup Final if they could secure at least 4 more points over the final two match days against Ko-oren and Chromatika.

Turori [1] - [0] Cassadaigua

:: Turori Goalscorers ::
:: 72' Amakli Inuro'o
:: Turori Statistics ::
:: Possession: 51%
:: Shots on Target: 5
:: Corner Kicks: 5
:: Cassadaigua Statistics ::
:: Possession: 49%
:: Shots on Target: 4
:: Corner Kicks: 7

Turori Eels Lineup v. Cassadaigua ::
[GK] Timaala Hualtia, [D.] Yitizo Mpala'a, [D.] Mikki Mayelli, [D.] Tarek Edgeli, [D.] Moumouni Verre'elali, [ML] Kentu Umaka'a, [MC] Mbdiai Akarenaa, [MC] Indelli Nura'amura, [MR] Timi'sala Koarena, [FC] Meldi'ita Mungwaii, [FC] Nua'oma Aikiki
[FC] Wiztsana Iretziia, [FC] Kala'a Yuliizala, [M] Saito Koshiki, [M] Lati'ala Giaoka, [U ] Amakli Inuro'o, [D] Lulu Pumaziiri, [GK] Wiyauw An'maude

<Silexhera> Why does Turori make sense? :p

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Postby Mriin » Mon Jan 20, 2020 9:04 pm

Maal Memoirs
Westhold > Westlands

Yon Kegaant
New Lakeland, Cassadaigua

Squaring off against Darmen in Cassadaigua was never going to be easy. It's certainly not home field advantage, but the trip for the All Greens fandom is wildly shorter--they share a Rushmori subcontinent, after all. Nobody will ever win a shouting match against Mrii no matter how small the latter's contingent is but damn if the Darmeni didn't put up a fight. On the other hand, the stark gender ratio of the Reavers seemed to rouse some of the locals to their side. Even if New Lakeland is a less femininity-dominated city, this is still the Matriarchy. A scant two men feature in the initial lineup and there is a slight lead for women on the bench, making them perhaps the best flagbearers for the gender behind the hosts themselves. Not to mention several Reaver stars past and present have made it a point to come out for the Feminist cause in human societies, despite gender rivalry being something satyr society left long beyond living memory--it's always gladdening to see those efforts strike a chord.

As for the football itself, Brennan was seen drilling her defense rigorously leading into this matchup. There was no official press statement on the matter, but it needn't be said there would be a concerted effort to make sure the shambolic display of the last Mriin-Darmen match--WC80's 5-5 debacle--wouldn't come to pass again. Some might say that we should let that nearly a decade old result go--and they’re probably right. But no-one can argue that the Reaver defense is always in need of refocusing, game after game; the bloodlust has never truly been sated. It was kept at bay, however, for ninety full minutes this night. And along with that, the Darmeni offense. The first half was a brutally physical affair where Maas and Reina threw their weight around, taking advantage of the lack of width presented by the All Greens’ formation to counterbalance their relative lack of pace. Craig Blackwood suffered the worst fate for a talismanic striker to suffer, being suffocated and not having that produce enough room for their teammates to capitalize on. So went the first half--the Darmeni attack being broken up time and time again, followed by extremely cautious Mrii advances so that the, erm, enigmatic captain Alberich Goldschmidt didn’t splatter them on the counter.

Over the break Brennan reportedly reminded the team that this was the fourth seed team, and they would absolutely need to score, quote, “A Goal.” (I was given direct orders to capitalize it as such.) This cued more aggressive assertions of Mrii possession and, of course, the first result was Goldschmidt employing some fancy footwork to deposses a surging Karii caught looking for someone to pass to. Reina was the only defender not caught by the break, ensuring Blackwood would never get a totally free chance, and the pressure was enough to force a tense but saveable shot. It took Mara laying out but she came up with it well in-hand. The breakthrough would come from an unlikely source: Popo finally wrangling his second international goal, first in a non-throwaway game, and what a game for it to come in. It started because of Cyrus Spalding’s rushed clearance messily deflecting off Popo’s hip and back into the box, where Solara reacted instantly to nearly roundhouse-kick it on--directly at Hyman Campo’s chest. But the keeper wasn’t able to collapse on it fast enough, and the sheer force of the kick spun him slightly--sending the ball careening right back to Popo, who gave it an old-fashioned horn bash past the shellshocked Campo.

The “Nintey-Five Ex” chants started to ring through the stadium, trying to bring some amount of shame to the proud Mrii as they parked the bus. There was no doubt that would never concern the Brenecian gaffer. But her resolve finally seems to be seeping into the team as even Maas kept his head cool and his tackles clean--perhaps trying to impress, as rumors of interest from high-level foreign clubs have been circulating his name. Blackwood was still without room to work, but Juanito Stafford and fresh-legs Mordecai Ó Cuilinn did manage to test Mara a few times; some ended up threatening, but all were speculative. The insurance goal that would finally come ended up being terribly anticlimactic: Portia tripped in the box when she tried to rub elbow-to-shoulder with Aurelio Di Stefano and the latter stepped out of the way. The ref called for a penalty, and despite polite protests from Goldschmidt, would not be swayed. She nervelessly converted and the lead was secure.

Mriin - 2
Tevainen 59’
Taani 73’
Darmen - 0
Last edited by Mriin on Mon Jan 20, 2020 9:08 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby Commonwealth of Baker Park » Mon Jan 20, 2020 9:15 pm

We're here on day 2, the Day of Reckoning for some.

AOCAF LXII Champions
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playoff semi-finalists
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playoff quarterfinalist
NSCF 19 & 20 Mineral Conference Champions

WLC Vice President
WLC 34 Fourth Place
WLC 30/31(host)/32/33/35 Quarterfinal
WLC 29 Playoff Round

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Postby Valanora » Mon Jan 20, 2020 9:43 pm

Espy va Drake and Faeron Soldarian have announced their retirement with immediate effect, heading home to the Empire even as the Marauders have a game left to play.
World Cup 40, 42, 43, 52, & 61 Champions
WC 47, 51 (2nd), WC 34, 38, 39, 41, 44, 45, 53, 60, 67 (3rd), WC 49, 58 (Semifinalist), WC 33, 35-37, 46, 48, 54, 55, 62, 63, 65, 72, 83 (Quarterfinalist)
WCoH VII, VIII, XVII, XXVIII, XXX, XXXII (1st), WCoH I, XXXI, XL (2nd), WCoH II, XXIX (3rd), WCoH XII (4th)
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Co-Hosted: too many events to count

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Elite, Episode 9

Postby Drawkland » Mon Jan 20, 2020 10:40 pm

E L I T E ...

If you're not caught up on this whole "Elite Eleven" thing, feel free to read up on the literature ...
A Hint * A Tease * A Story * A Contradiction * A Roster
Episode 1 * Episode 2 * Episode 3 * Episode 4 * Episode 5 * Episode 6
Episode 7 * Episode 8

"Wait ... she just said no?" Cam asked, suddenly confused. "She told us that she listened to your request and reasoning and simply told you what she knew and sent you off."

Jaxon grinned, "Let me finish, okay! That's not exactly what happened, away. Far from it, really." He shot a glance across the table at what looked to be Septimus.

"So she goes and walks back into the tree, and we just kinda look at each other in shock. Someone said 'hey, maybe she's just not so accepting of newcomers, you know how the myths and stories go', and we mostly agreed with that. We had the materials and stuff, so we just decided to camp out in the wilderness for a few days and see what would happen. There's dozens of little campgrounds and clearings surrounding The Tree so we picked one close to the soccer pitch and set it all up.

"They always talk about the danger of the Ellzidanian wilderness but around Elstrund it isn't so bad. Especially in the midst of those huge roots. There's tons of like, magical energy or whatever. Some arcane stuff like that, I'm not exactly one to be talking with authority about it because I really have no idea what I'm talking about, but that's what I've heard."

"Yeah, you can probably ask Ellzidan and she'll throw out a bunch of mumbo jumbo and put you to sleep!" Richard Hanson exclaimed from the other side of the table. Everybody laughed.

"That, or give you the cold shoulder and say nothing." Craig Bakker added, to another round of laughs.

"Right, right ..." Jaxon said, ringing everything back in. "So we just camped out for a bit. Did some tourism. Played soccer for hours on end at the field, though we did do some gridiron too. Eventually after like three days the elf showed herself again. She joined in another couple games of soccer, but when we tried getting her to play a round of gridiron she balked and started to leave. Fortunately before we left, somebody managed to talk to her and convince her to at least let us stay in the tree itself, since there's lodging there.

"That would be me," Septimus spoke up. The boys nodded in agreement.

"Yeah, it was you, unsurprisingly. It was a relief not having to sleep on the ground anymore, though it's not like they had the best lodging available inside of a sentient tree. Good mattresses are apparently hard to come by out in the wilderness. That's not the point actually. Anyway, we spent a few more days there, except this time we were mostly spending time with Ellzidan. She gave us an abbreviated tour and all that, and we all found things to do. Played more ball, all of that. The last night we were there, we had a small feast together, all 30-odd of us plus her and a bunch of residents from Elstrund that, y'know, live there. Similarly to when we were with Iarocav, there was plenty of conversation over dinner. But as the night winded down, the desserts were finished and most of the residents left. Even a few of our guys left by then, to go sleep.

"This is when Ellzidan regaled her tale of when she went through the labrynth. You'd think it be redundant, since she was with Iarocav and all, but they all had different experiences when they were there. Plus, as you may know, people remember or forget certain things over others, so it's good to cover your bases. It was a great help to us, and most of us left after that. A few more stuck around to talk awhile longer, but I was the last person to leave besides Septimus, who stayed awhile longer if I remember." There were some more glances at Septimus, and a few chuckles.

"Unfortunately, that was our last night. We were informed, rather coldly, that we were to leave immediately. First thing in the morning. Like, before sunrise, because Ellzidan threw a bunch of buckets of ice water all over us in our beds and told us to get out. Not the best way to end the trip but we got what we came for and had a good time in the process. We packed our stuff and bounced, and that was that. The next couple months we spent gathering supplies and putting together a plan for our fateful trip. It took a-"

"Listen, I hate to interrupt," interjected Sarah suddenly, drawing attention to her (and the 6 empty cans in front of her). "I hate to interrupt, but I like really want to go to bed right now. Could we talk another match? Another ... another day?"

"Oh my God Sarah, who let you get those?" Cam gasped, realizing she'd had too much to drink.

"I guess we should pause for the night," Nicole sighed, and a few of the Eleven agreed. Some of them were laughing.

"Yeah, that's a good stopping point anyway!" Jaxon exclaimed. "Now let's get Sarah to her room before she hurls all over this nice table and makes us pay a fee."
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Postby Starblaydia » Tue Jan 21, 2020 11:12 am

"I thought you'd have loved the idea of using knights for the Holy Empire's team this time around, Simeone," Ázëwyn Fëanáro said, staring across the table as she swirled her Château Latour 1945 gently in the candlelight, "given your propensity for jumping onto a horse and waving a sword around in a rather fetching manner."

The Starblaydi manager and the Holy Empire assistant manager were enjoying their pre-match dinner, now something of a tradition, whenever their sides met in the World Cup Finals. Here, in a small, exclusive, Oceana restaurant on the banks of the Stillwater River, this decidedly more of the outward appearance of a 'date' than any previous encounter. The ice cream on the beach in Cosumar during World Cup 78 had been fairly innocent as things went, but given their current intimate surroundings and smartly-dressed nature, this seemed like much more of an occasion.

"It would, normally," Simeone admitted, "I'm more of a five-mil polished steel plate and mail kind of guy than their sort of knight, but then again I'm sure even my memories of ancient Starblaydi cavalry are - what's the word? - anachronistic, at best."

"Oh, no," Ázëwyn offered with a wry smile, "I was there at the time, too. It was all very cinematic."

Simeone and Ázëwyn had managed, thanks to the vagaries of time travel, to meet for the first time twice. The first time Ázëwyn met Simeone was some ten centuries ago, according to her. This was thanks to the Pantochronometer, an artefact that had managed to send Simeone back in time to this period. For him, he had already met Starblaydia's most famous female elf around a hundred and sixty years ago, when the World Cup was in its mid-forties, and going back in time he knew precisely who she was already. You never get a second chance to make a first impression, they say, and these two immortals had managed to make a terrible first impression on each other on both occasions. They had discussed this at length over dinner before, but that was two and a half years ago to an outside perspective.

"I'm sure." Simeone smiled as he finished the last bite of his pâté de foie gras and placed the small silver fork down delicately on his plate. "the thing that gets me with the side the most, though, is all the god-bothering."

"Ah," Ázëwyn raised her glass in mock-dramatic fashion, "the classic Starblaydi anti-theist: no gods be present here, but the strength of men and their zealot-like devotion to animist symbology."

"I would argue," Simeone shrugged, always the first to admit his faults, "but I'm not certain what that means, exactly. What I really have an issue with, is exploiting this bunch of idiots' faith to get them to play football."

"Like you did with the cavemen?"

"That was different," he replied, "they really did love to play football, or rather, rockball."

"But they didn't, inherently, understand the concept of the World Cup," Ázëwyn proffered her suggestion, "the history, the meaning, the importance and so forth. They wanted to win because everyone wants to win at the things they do, and they were very good at that. And then Ug-ug scored, probably, the goal which won the World Cup for The Holy Empire. A goal which you, naturally, provided the cross for. And all this at the time, striving for a first World Cup trophy, a first Holy Grail of international football and likely the entire idea of sport in the first place, was conceptually fine for you, correct? So now, in yet another quest for that Holy Grail, you and the inimitable Mister Tzimices are taking a fresh group of Upper-Class Twits of the Year on an heroic adventure of daring-do to match the greatest kings and queens ever to play the game. So how is that different to the cavemen?"

"I- I don't know." Simeone frowned a little. "I came here for a lovely dinner. I didn't expect a kind of Starblaydi Inquisition."

"Nobody expects the Starblaydi Inquisition," Ázëwyn pointed her finger at him like a knife, narrowing her eyes. "I hear their chief weapon is surprise. Surprise and fear."

"Don't forget ruthless efficiency," Simeone said, "three weapons."

"Their three weapons are fear, and surprise, and ruthless efficiency, and an almost fanatical devotion to the Lady-Protector." She supressed a giggle. "Alright, amongst their weapons - weaponry? - are such elements as fear, surprise..."

She tailed off. He was giving her that silly blank look again, the one with the smile and the twinkle in his eyes. Ázëwyn stopped playing Cardinal for the moment, putting her hands back on the table and leaning forward, hunching her shoulders.

"I've just had an idea," she said, "I'll distract all your players with a grail-shaped beacon!"

"Too late," Simeone said, "Sir Therapon the Chaste already succumbed to that once."

"Really? Dammit."

"I'm sure he could only fall for it seven or eight more times," Simeone smiled.

"Okay," Ázëwyn thought for a moment, "how about I build a massive wooden rabbit, un lapin de bois if you like-"

"John Bois?"

"Wrong reference," Ázëwyn shook her head, "and then, uh, McCloud, Capodanno and I, uh, wait until nightfall, and then leap out of the rabbit, taking the Frosticans by surprise. Not only be surprise, but totally unarmed!"

"Not entirely sure how that's relevant to our football match," Simeone said.

"I know," Ázëwyn sighed, "I'm just thinking of that jarred hare I ordered. Seemed like a sensible decision at the time but now I'm not so certain."

"When it arrives, you can swap it for my Rushmori Swallow if you like," offered Simeone, "to think, it migrated all the way here with its coconut only to be cooked and served with it."

"Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?" Ázëwyn held her fist out across the table, holding an imaginary microphone.

"Not at all." Simeone refuted. "They could be carried."

"What?" She could barely contain her laughter. "A swallow carrying a coconut?"

"It could grip it by the husk." Simeone had learned that word recently, and pronounced it exactly in the manner of someone trying to sound clever.

"It's not a question of where it grips it! It's a simple question of weight ratios! A five ounce bird could not carry a one pound coconut."

"Well, it doesn't matter." Simeone shrugged. "The main course is here, and my swallow comes with coconut one way or the other."

"I wish they were bringing it on a strand of creeper," Ázëwyn said, dragging out the joke for much too long, as per usual, "perhaps they could hold it under the dorsal guiding feathers. Say, did The Holy Empire ever field a team of Philosophers yet? I feel like that would fit their team in their own particular daring and heroic..." she tailed off, looking for the right word with a soft sigh.



"I think it's been done," Simeone said after a moment's thought, "I gather Sir Augustine of Hippo didn't make the squad this time."

"Ah, yes!" Ázëwyn now seized on the segue of something completely different that allowed her to return to the topic at hand. "Back to the god-bothering that you're not comfortable with. It's only like if you crossed The Archregimancy squad with the cavemen and then once more crossed them with the much-heralded ancient Starblaydi cavalry, isn't it? How is it really any different to the sentient blancmanges, or the Aztec gods, the Chaps, or even the regular footballers?"

"Much more kneeling."

"You'd have knelt for La Belle Dame Sans Merci, I'm sure." Ázëwyn's eyes flashed with mischief.

"Never once would I." Simeone managed to catch this verbal jest of hers smoothly, arguably for the first time in all the years they had known each other. "Even a woman, and a faery, as beautiful and dangerous and as brilliant a defender as she is, pales in comparison to a certain two-time World Cup winner, World Cup Hall of Famer and entirely charming dinner companion."

For once, Ázëwyn could only blush as they clinked their wine glasses together.
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Postby Banija » Tue Jan 21, 2020 12:29 pm


10 man Banija grinds out 2-0 victory over HUElavia to earn first victory of World Cup 84

Banijan players celebrate opening goal against HUElavia on Matchday 2 of World Cup 84

VICTORIAVILLE, CASSADAIGUA- We opened World Cup 84 with an entertaining, but ultimately, disappointing 3-2 loss to Farfadillis in World Cup 84. Now, of course, a loss to a top 10 side with a great footballing culture like Farfadillis isn't exactly anything to be ashamed of- but a loss in the opening game is a loss in the opening game, no matter how you package it. It is not the end of the world- we are playing in a 3 game group stage, of course, where there are at least two more guaranteed matches for us to be able to possibly earn points and still get to the knockout stages. But it makes the job that much tougher. The margin for error, of course, becomes almost zero. And considering HUElavia emerged victorious over Zwangzug in Matchday 1, that made this game essentially an elimination game for the Kadongo Kamu. If Farfadillis was able to earn at least one point(they ended up with all three) against Zwangzug on Matchday 2, and HUElavia was able to defeat the Banijans, then we would be out of the tournament with a game remaining. It would be a shocking early exit for a team that came into this tournament with such high hopes, after such a strong World Cup performance last time around on home soil. It would be an early exit that would shine a harsh spotlight on what they achieved in the World Cup 83 cycle, reaching an AOCAF Final and World Cup semifinal, both on home soil. It would ask a whole lot of questions about how the team wasn't prepared for the bright lights when they didn't have overwhelming home support.

And overwhelming home support they did not have in this game. Not that it's a bad thing- most teams at World Cups don't have overwhelming home support. There were certainly more Banijans at the Farfadillis match, considering the tragedy of what had happened in Farfadillis. But there was no state of anarchy in HUElavia- no, there was a sense of hope among HUElavians. This was their first ever World Cup, and they came in without any pressure of expectations whatsoever. You can't forget that feeling at your first World Cup, can you? Of course, ours wasn't all that long ago, either. Who remembers World Cup 80? The energy felt, of course, was emphatic and electric within the country. We were all surprised, we were all excited, and very hopeful, taking on the best nations of the world. And that's where HUElavia is. Except, unlike Banija, they actually won their first ever World Cup game. In stunningly dramatic fashion, it had been 16 year old Marc Navarro who scored a goal 4 minutes into second half stoppage time, and gave himself a goal of a lifetime and Los Amarillos their first ever victory at a World Cup Finals.

They were already a team with nothing to fear. And now, as they always say, winning breeds more winning. Not only do they have nothing to fear, as they didn't have any expectations coming in, but they came into their match with Banija glowing with confidence. Coming off of a big win, knowing that no matter what happened today, they'd have a chance to play for a berth in the knockout stages. And everybody knew the pressure was on Banija. Banija's chances of getting to the next stage would be almost none with a draw, and would be exactly none with a loss. They needed not just a result today- they needed to earn all three points, and this would be their path to doing so. But that also set up for an entertaining game. HUElavia was not a team that was built to sit back and absorb pressure from the opponent. That was not their style, and even with our #3 ranking, they played their brand of football.

Early on, the HUElavians truly threatened and looked as if they would have a chance to score. The Banijans seemed to be taken aback at their aggressiveness- did we assume that they'd prefer to sit back, considering the disparity between the teams in ranks? Regardless of that, Los Amarillos really went after the Banijans to start this game. Cristiano fired a shot in the 4th minute, when he was open at the top of the 18, that had all sorts of pace on it, but it went straight to the hands of Lemuel Bereket, the Banijan goalkeeper. THey had another opportunity in the 9th minute, when Rossi beat some Banijan defenders on the dribble, and looked to be through on goal. However, the $22 million NSD defender Kuma Bultum proved why Raynor City spent a small fortune on him, when he made a perfect goals saving tackle when he looked to be a step too slow on the play. Considering he was slightly behind, he had to make sure the sliding tackle was exactly right, or else HUElavia would have been given a penalty and he would have seen red. But he timed and executed the sliding challenge perfectly, and Bereket was able to collect the ball.

From that point forward, the Banijans, who had seemed surprised at HUElavia's aggressiveness, started to settle down. The Kadongo Kamu knew what was at stake- they didn't want to face an early elimination, and they knew exactly how good they were. They weren't going to go out of the World Cup here, in the group stages, like this. WE started to bring the ball forward a bit more and start to truly challenge the HUElavian defense. An Ilman Jawara strike in the 15th minute had to be saved by a sprawling Ricardo, while an 18th minute header by Bultum on a corner kick was cleared off the line by a HUElavian defender. But it showed this- the Banijans were settling into the game, and getting a rhythm going. The ability to hold and maintain pressure at this level is crucial. In international football, of course, you don't get as much practice time as you do for your clubs, and it is that much harder to defend against an organized attack. And HUElavia was going to have to do it in front of a team as talented as the Banijans.

They were not going to be able to hold out forever if we maintained our pressure, and that was proven in the 31st minute. Namakula Kawesa was fouled just outside the edge of the 18, and a free kick was granted to the Banijans. Gitonga Kahara, the all-time leading goalscorer for the Kadongo Kamu and their captain, and leader, stood over the ball. There was only one player who was going to take this free kick, and Kahara had that look in his eye. The OAS Royal FC winger wanted to take the free kick, and then he placed the ball down, waiting to take the kick. It's always interesting to think about Kahara- Banija's most ever celebrated youth prospect, he has been under the spotlight for half of his entire life. And yet, he always seems to take the spotlight extremely well. He didn't feel the pressure as much. He was relaxed, and the Banijans could feel that something special was about to happen. Kahara lined up a little bit to the side, and then ran up and struck the ball beautifully. Curling towards the center and then hooking towards the bottom right corner, Ricardo was frozen in place by the bending ball. Far too late for him to react, a perfect shot. The stunning goal gave the Banijans a 1-0 lead, as the team started to dogpile upon their captain.

The Banijans had a 1-0 lead- their first of the tournament. They never led against Farfadillis. And now, the teams were going to go back and forth. The Banijans had their lead, and were on the way to three points. But with over an hour of gameplay left, against a team that had already proved that they can leave it late to score their goal, it was still going to be very much a game. And for the rest of the first half, both teams got after it. Hard tackles, going up and down the field, the Banijans trying to counter but not quite getting them right, it was a good game to watch between the Pot 1 and Pot 4 sides in what is turning out to be an extremely close and competitive Group C. It was surely going to be a tense second half. HUElavia could freely go after it, and try to get that goal, while the Banijans would be trying to get that second goal to bury HUElavia, and help themselves in that all important category of goal differential, useful if there is a tie in the final table.

Marcus Waters wanted to shore things up in the back. He brought on Demba Kinteh, the Port Sebastian defender who is a RBSA Cup and U18 World champion, to play center back in the place of Kawsu Kaba. This, of course, would be Demba Kinteh's World Cup debut. Shoring things up in the back is not a bad strategy when you need to protect a slim lead against a team that likes to bring the ball forward, that likes to attack. But for a large portion of the start of the second half, it would be Banija putting on the pressure. Getting a second goal would be a great advantage, assuming that they did not concede. And the Banijans went for it. Ricardo was the reason that the Banijans were not able to build that lead for a large part of the half. Ricardo denied an open Ugonna inside the box, by making a leaping save. He denied Jawara twice, and he denied Kawesa once. Banija's best attackers were really getting after it, trying to double their lead from 1 to 2, but they could not do so.

The tension built as the game reached the 75 minute mark. The Banijans could not keep throwing numbers forward- they might have had to give up this effort of getting a second goal, and just focus on holding on for the 1-0 victory, unless they could counter with pace. And for the final 15 or so minutes, HUElavia started to put the pressure onto the Kadongo Kamu, and the Banijan defense packed it in, trying to hold out. The Banijans were doing fairly well trying to slam the door, though things went a little haywire for the team in the 84th minute. Kahara was guarding Gonzalez-Rios, and the HUElavian defender made a move past the Banijan winger, around 30 or so yards from goal. Kahara, of course, went for the sliding challenge, but it was poorly timed- didn't get any of the ball, and clattered straight into the back of the HUElavian winger's legs. Unsurprisingly, the referee blew his whistle, and jogged over. The referee reached into their pocket, and quite surprisingly, pulled out a red. Many thought a yellow would have happened, but the Banijans were stunned. It was a hard foul, yes, but it was a harsh red. But the decision was the referee's. And the Banijan captain, receiving the first red card of his career wearing the national team colors, stalked off the field, taking his side down to 10 men.

Now, HUElavia really started to pile on the pressure. The Banijans had to get their stuff together, and fast- they were emotional after losing their captain, but they could not wilt here. The armband was given to Kizza Okafor, who began barking out orders. They were going to defend with their lives, and everybody was packed in. Ablie Kah was brought on for Ugonna, although he played more with the midfielders. The attack was just a roaming Ilman Jawara. HUElavia kept floating crosses into the box, but the Banijans did not let their opponents get any clear opportunities on goal. A cross floated into the box in the 88th minute was caught by Lemuel Bereket, and he ran out, seeing a streaking Nzo going up the center of the field. He heaved the ball down the field, and all of a sudden, the counter-attack was on. Nzo with the ball in the middle of the field, Jawara racing up the left sideline, and wing back Selassie racing up the right sideline. Nzo passed the ball down the right sideline, and Selassie raced to get it. HUElavia's defenders could not get back in time. Selassie dribbled up the field and struck the ball towards the near post with pace, and Ricardo did not have a chance. Ephrem Selassiee then ran to the corner to celebrate. What a time for the 31 year old defender to score his first career goal for the national team, was it not?

That took the wind out of the sails for HUElavia. Not much happened after the second goal, and that ended up being the final score, a 2-0 victory for the Kadongo Kamu. Marcus Waters paid a compliment to Los Amarillos after the match. "I, of course, want to congratulate them on even getting this far. Making your first World Cup is always the hardest, because you've never done it before. Your first World Cup is always a special, and we remember ours fondly in Banija. They fought bravely today- they did not play with fear, they did not adjust their play style- they went for the win, and I respect them for their confidence. Our team had to earn all three points today, and that we did. It was a hard fought game, and we had to play well on defense for all 90 minutes to keep them out of goal, as they certainly threatened against Bereket. But this is just one game- we high five each other tonight, but tomorrow, we're recovering and preparing for Zwangzug."

And that will be a big one. It will be a massive tilt between Banija and the currently last place Zwangzug side. Considering how this group is shaping up, Banija will likely need all three points to advance. If we do get all three points, the chances of advancing are very high, though not 100%. IF we won, the circumstances where HUElavia and Farfadillis could both have 6 points and both beat us in goal differential are small. But if we don't win, all of a sudden, the next round is a pipe dream. If we lose, our chances of the Round of 16 are almost impossible, and with a draw, we'd need a lot of help from the other game- something that is unlikely to come willingly. But we can control our own destiny. But it will be quite a challenge. We will have to play Zwangzug without the services of our star player and captain, Gitonga Kahara. His red card, however harsh, means he'll be suspended for the next game, this high stakes must win match. The manager spoke about that as well.

"The referee's decision was quite harsh and unjustified, but it was the decision." He told reporters. "There's no way around it- not having Kahara on the field is a blow. He's our team leader, and one of our star players. This is a Galactico level talent, even if he isn't a technical member of that list. But this is a team sport. This isn't about one man, or eleven- it is about the full 23 stepping up when they need to. We saw Demba Kinteh played well today, we saw Ablie Kah play well, we are going to have to step up and do it without our captain. We're going to have Alanso Tamba start at right wing, and move Nwabudike Ugonna over to the left wing slot. IT will be tough, but these are the circumstances we are given. Kahara has played so well for us over the years- we can do this for him as well." But tough it will be. Tamba is certainly a talented player, but he is not Kahara. The pressure will be on Kawesa. She's a talented attacking midfielder, and a lot of the offensive creation responsibilities will come down to her on Matchday 3. Zwangzug is sure to smother her with defenders- can she overcome that adversity and extra pressure to help bring Banija into the knockout stages? We will find out.

Banija's group stage fate will be decided in a few days time at Cassgo Stadium in Victoriaville. Get excited for what will surely be an entertaining match. And as always, go Banija!
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Postby Ko-oren » Tue Jan 21, 2020 1:14 pm

Chaos reigns with MD3 on horizon

Cassadaigua 0–1 Turori
'72 Inuro'o
Chromatika 1–0 Ko-oren
'68 Armageddon

Turori 1–3 Ko-oren
'90+3 Giaoka | '2 Batchelor '11 Van Schelven '30 Novoa
Cassadaigua 2–0 Chromatika

Two very late goals seemed to banish Cassadaigua and Ko-oren to the bottom of the group with a lot of fight left in them - but with their backs against the wall and two must-win games in order to keep the Round of 16 in their own hands. Well, these teams did just that, and catapulted from a shared 3rd place to first and second. All four teams are sitting on three points, leading to a win-and-you're-in third matchday. Should all matches end in a tie (of which there have been zero in the Dagan side of the World Cup so far!), the winners of day two will go to the next round, with their two-goal wins surpassing the win margins on day one. The biggest winners of the day were the Dragonflies, scoring three against Turori in our best match so far. This may have been our best match ever, scoring three goals against such an opponent at the biggest stage, and everything on the line. A loss today would have relegated Ko-oren v Cassadaigua to a glorified practice match (from our perspective) - although, even that scenario could give us a second round berth. No matter how you look at it, sitting atop the group with the best goal difference and the most goals scored is definitely not where we envisioned us. Now that we're here, we might as well make the best of it, and maybe even that Quarterfinal Curse could be lifted.

Of course, before we get there, we face Cassadaigua. For both games on the third day in Group A, the winner advances. We have Ko-oren versus Cassadaigua, the winner advances, the loser will go home. The same goes for Turori versus Chromatika. Should Ko-oren and Cassadaigua tie, then Ko-oren will advance along with the winner of the other match. Should Turori and Chromatika fail to deliver a winner, then Turori advances along with the winner of the other match. With two ties, the standings stay as they are and the Dragonflies and Dagans go on to face Eura and Kita-Hinode, who have already clinched Group B. Oh, Group B, where life has become much simpler now the aforementioned teams won both their matches and will only decide on placement in the final game, and 95X and Valanora are eliminated. As a matter of fact, Eura has already produced 10 goals so far, winning 5-2 today and 5-3 earlier. All in all, Group B is a perfect opposite to Group A: 2 qualified teams versus 0. 24 goals in four matches versus 8. In the other groups, we have no qualifiers yet. Farfadillis and Brenecia could allow a loss and still advance, but it comes down to the results of both remaining matches. Zwangzug and Darmen are nearly eliminated, and Banija, HUElavia, South Covello, and Mriin all have a chance left. In Baker Park, only Vilita has booked their place in the second round.

That's not to say that the match versus the Vilitan Cove's Turori was easy. As in, the scoreline and the timeline suggest that it was an easy affair, with Ko-oren jumping to a 2-0 lead before the match is well under way, and a 3-0 lead at halftime, only allowing our region-mates some solace deep into injury time. Batchelor opened the score from a decent range, surprising An'maude as well as everyone who considers themselves (partially) an Eel. There was nothing really there to suggest that his attempt could work, but the ball picked up a decent wobble, and flew in at the far post. The Dragonflies now got wings and everything seemed to work automatically, as designed. Longchambon won a corner kick on an attempt from close range, for which the Air Force entered the box: Van Schelven, Lampshire, Janoreirinthen, Vaugrenard, all clumped up, only to jump into position at the very last second with the ball on its way. Van Schelven got his crown to it at the near post, and Ko-oren was 2-0 up. The crowd, which did turn out to be a majority of Eels, quieted down. The Dragonflies took time to acclimatise, settle down, but never let their foot off the gas. Razor-sharp passing between Batchelor, Janoreirinthen, and Longchambon. Simple interceptions by Dalton and Hellegeland. Van Schelven, Mizuno, and Lampshire made the man-zone defence look easy. Frustrations mounted as early as the 25th minute. Lampshire led the charge against Iretziia, who retaliated straight away, both were shown a yellow card. If only things didn't escalate further... which they did, minutes later, and now Umaka'a and Hellegeland were booked as well. Janoreirinthen was too enthusiastic in trying to win the ball back, while Toru'u tried to kickstart a Turorian counterattack, and was also booked. All twenty-two players ran towards the centre circle, the epicentre of the foul, but miraculously everyone escaped the wrath of the referee, if only because there were too many questionable acts to keep track of. Captains of both teams were cautioned, coaches were called over to the officials, and the match went on. As a final nail in the coffin, Novoa beat two defenders, ran past the goalie, to score the most technical goal of the day. Turori lost the will to fight a little bit, dejected, while the Dragonflies were exhausted after half an hour of play. The game slowed down dramatically as the coaches desperately tried to relight the fire of the first thirty minutes. Early substitutions for Ko-oren: Hellegeland off for Brogley, and Janoreirinthen off for Yokota. An even more defensive Dragonfly team then kept the three-goal lead intact until the very last minute. Then Iretziia capped off a final assault by the Turorians to score the consolation goal: 3-1.

Meanwhile, a Reçueçian press release teaches us that Ko-oren and Cassadaigua both come off of a poor few years, while the other group-mates are on pretty good records, Chromatika only missing out on the World Cup two cycles ago. Turori is among the ten longest qualification streaks, while Ko-oren narrowly misses out on the 'spottiest record' award with five separate World Cup qualification streaks in the last several decades, alongside Apox, and again, Turori - only beaten out by Sargossa, who have six.

There's not much news beyond that other than that Ko-orenite clubs have largely landed the targets they had: Helzinger joines Tanques from 1923 Esca, Aminey gets Argall from Traal Athletics, Whitewoods goes to the southeast for Cirelbourne while leaving Pasargan Titanderth, and Straudum gets Virtanen from Transport Hovikkära. No Ko-orenite bids have been outright rejected, but Bruncester and Branvon have probably set their sights too high.
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Postby HUElavia » Tue Jan 21, 2020 2:19 pm

HUElavia brought to ground with loss to Banija

HUElavia came into Matchday 2 with destiny in their feet: Coming off a late 1-0 victory over Zwangzug in their inaugural match in the World Cup, having a talented and young squad that grows by the day, and having no expectations and nothing to lose. Headed into their match against Banija, the #3 team in the world, reigning Bronze Medalist and co-host from World Cup 83, and one of the 16 teams to lose in matchday 1, Los Amarillos were given a golden opportunity: A win would ensure HUElavia in the Round-of-16 and eliminate Banija. A possibly historic feat and upset was 90 minutes away at Qusmair Stadium (77,000) in New Lakeland. The stadium was sold out, with roughly only 2% of the fans being native Cassadaiguans, while the remaining 98% were split between a sea of Yellow HUElavians and Orange Banijans.

The match started with HUElavia taking control of attacks, with Cristiano taking a blistering shot in the 4th minute after being left one-on-one with Bereket, only for the Banijan goalkeeper to stop the shot with a grab. In the 9th minute, Rossi had sped past defenders and was about to get a shot in when Bultum gave a hard but clean tackle to dispose the ball away from a possible shot. Banija then took control of the match, and in a Jawara strike in the 15th minute was saved by Ricardo, while an 18th minute header by Bultum from a corner kick was cleared off the line by Amaru. The opening goal game in the 31st minute, where a free kick taken by Kahara curved over the wall of HUElavian players and into the bottom corner, where Ricardo stood frozen from the surprising curve. The scoreline read HUElavia 0-1 Banija, with Kahara being mobbed by his teammates in the celebration. The first half ended with the score at 0-1.

The second half came and HUElavia kept on pushing and pushing, looking to score. But in the 75th minute, Kahara tried to take the ball away from Gonzalez, only to miss the ball completely from the tackle, and produced a foul. Surprisingly, Kahara was given a red card for a foul that many thought would be a yellow card. Following that Red Card, HUElavia would attack, but in the 84th minute, a pass from Nzo met the foot of Selassie, who slid it in to make it 0-2, where Selassie was also mobbed,while the goal took the wind out of Los Amarillos. The match ended 0-2, with HUElavia sliding down to 3rd place in Group C.

Matchday 3 is a Must-Win for Los Amarillos, as they play against Farfadillis in Winchester City Lottery Stadium (59,000) in Winchester. To advance, HUElavia must get more points than Banija. In other words, HUElavia must either Win vs Farfadillis AND Banija gets a draw or loss vs Zwangzug, OR HUElavia must draw with Farfadillis AND Banija gets a loss vs Zwangzug. A possible 3-way-tie at 6 points could spell elimination for HUElavia. Regardless, the whole country is out there to support the national team.

Last edited by HUElavia on Thu Jan 23, 2020 2:01 pm, edited 3 times in total.
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Postby Taeshan » Tue Jan 21, 2020 5:37 pm

"Five minutes into the game and Shiloh Morgenstern banks the ball off the goalies hands into the top of the net, and the Knights led the World Champs. Did you know in that moment that you were going to win the day?"

"I mean Shiloh doesn't score a lot of goals from the left wing, but it really changed the game for us. We play best with a lead. We've always been such a defensive side that if we can score a goal early the game is basically over. It was an incredible early goal from Shiloh, but then we conceded."

"Yes a late first half goal. What was your halftime team talk"?

"I told the guys to keep their heads up. You play the world champs and are tied at halftime in a game you have no business competing in. You take that, you run with it. You keep your heads up and you close out for the point."

"Then Randall Abl Bakr goes down with a slight strain. In comes Aidan Foster, and bam the young Hurricanes defender wins the game in the 80th minute. How is Randall doing, and what about that performance off the bench from Foster"?

"Great performance by Foster. Honestly you expect Wilhelm to be the Atlantean who scores, but Foster played great. Randall should be back for the next game. He's our Captain, he's a fighter. He'll be there against Apox. We have a big chance with two wins to have our best World Cup ever, and Abl Bakr will want to have his legacy remembered."

"You mention that game against Apox. You have the lead in the group, but historically speaking Apox has won 5 of 9, with a tie. Both Neutral site games were losses. But they lost to Equestria. What do you have prepared for this game"?

"I think we take it a day at a time. We've only once scored more than 6 points total in a World Cup, and that was our run at 64. We've never won the first two games of the tournament and had the group in our hands. It's all to play for. I think we have the talent, the push, and the friendships to get us over the top."

"A lot can happen in this game. In fact if Equestria slips up you advance, honestly as long as you don't lose by more than 2 goals chances are you advance. How do you prepare for this game knowing all that"?

"I think the most important thing is that we can fail to advance. We have to keep that in our minds. There is probably a 90 percent chance we advance, but we can fail. We have to say humble. We have played well over two matchdays, but failure on any matchday after today and that could end our tournament. I always said once we got here our goal was to advance and to compete. We are competing. Now we need to advance."

"Any truth to the rumor that the Federation is looking for a partner to bid to host World Cup 85"?

"I am just the coach. If we hosted the World Cup for the first time I would take that as an incredible opportunity. But I am just a coach. That decision is far above my pay-grade."

"Do you expect to win"?

"I always expect to win. Maybe that is hubris. But I was always the player to score the goals, and I have instilled in my players that same belief in themselves. Hopefully...Hopefully we can continue our upward trajectory when we face Apox."
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Postby Zwangzug » Tue Jan 21, 2020 6:42 pm

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Is the "takilante" the role of the future, or merely a look at what can go wrong when you try to make portmanteaus from multiple languages? Faragó rue Cazade certainly belives the former, with a blazing header in minute 34 and an assist to the dominant Xíxì Êns. La Vherderoja's "false nine," who confuses numerologists by boasting a true number 9 on the back of his jersey, was on impressive form. A late goal which might prove to be more "important piece of goal difference" than "nail in the coffin" came from Vínseslâdís Wìjìnì, assisted by Ezequiel Marchiondo, a favorite of this reporter because he is one of the few Farf players who I can actually spell


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Did You Know Sabrefell Athletic's logo is a freaking bovine? Like tbh I only follow the Nepharim league for the trolley problem commentary and


Marlon Sayle-Bren's goal came after a fine individual effort, but the overall team's cohesion was lacking, and


Top Eleven Tasty Breakfast Foods to Eat at Peak'n'Break Stadium!!


With Paige Daunten laboring for a North Sabrefell side that flirted with relegation, and Laurel Tinker-Witt probably needing more experience at Dwile before she's ready for the big time, it remains to be seen if whoever Zwangzug finds to replace Maclaurin can coax Joel McJakill back for another cycle. Certainly he's been tremendous at Keppal, a core piece of the team that won back-to-back titles, [we'll fill in something here depending on how the international tournaments go, don't print this yet. -ed] But he is getting old, and the next full-time boss will probably have not have as much sway over him as Willow or even Maclaurin. Or maybe we're just needlessly stereotyping, there.


Wait a minute do those Lipogram guys even know that Okafor has three wives??? I just read the newswires and


Maclaurin acknowledged the skill and determination of the Farfadillis side, but very disappointingly, weaseled out of trying to pronounce any of the nonstandard diacritics like a coward.
IRC humor, (self-referential)
My issues
...using the lens of athletics to illustrate national culture, provide humor, interweave international affairs, and even incorporate mathematical theory...
WARNING: by construing meaning from this sequence of symbols, you have given implicit consent to the theory that words have noncircular semantic value and can be used to encode information about an external universe. Proceed with caution.



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