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by Land Without Shrimp » Sat Apr 13, 2019 4:36 am
by Trotterdam » Sat Apr 13, 2019 8:36 am
#1196 The Properties of PropertyI'm going by the draft thread for macros.
The Issue
A city patrician walking down a narrow street found his path blocked by a slave, who was carrying a large antique vase for @@HIS/HER@@ master and refused to give way. The patrician struck the slave with his cane, which, thanks to the silver @@ANIMAL@@ head adorning its tip, killed the slave and caused the vase to smash on the ground. While the patrician has offered to pay for both destroyed properties, there are questions being raised over what constitutes proper behaviour by and towards slaves.
The Debate
1. "That @@BOY/GIRL@@ was precious to me!" rages the slave's master, shaking his soft-skinned fists in anger. "@@HE/SHE@@'s been in my family since Daddy got @@HIM/HER@@ in lieu of an old business debt. Why, the idea of some callous son of a gun raising his hand to @@HIM/HER@@ simply makes my blood boil burgundy! Nobody's got the right to beat a @@BOY/GIRL@@ except @@HIS/HER@@ rightful owner! This should be treated as a case of murder, or at the very least, manslaughter."
2. "With respect to my fellow citizen and slave owner, this is ridiculous," complains the rotund patrician, taking a seat on the back of a wincing arthritic slave on all fours. "A slave is not a human. Rather, it is mere property, so what I did can't be murder. To be a slave is to be of a lower order of existence, owned by a master, but also in fetters to the state and to society as a whole. A slave should be compelled to obey and defer to every citizen in addition to its master, who still has ultimate authority over the slave, of course. Have the law codify the lowly status of the helot, and we can all proceed in a more civilised manner." He breaks wind noisily, to the discomfort of his human stool.
3. "I'm not going to suggest we abolish slavery," starts known abolitionist @@RANDOMNAME@@, "but maybe we could put in some sort of bill of rights recognising universal humanity and the protection of the law? Something like making sure that no slave can be forced to work against their will, and that financial compensation should be offered for all work, and that no man or woman may be the property of another. Not abolishing slavery, nothing so radical. Just giving slaves some basic freedoms, like the right to self-determination. That sounds reasonable, right? No-one could call that abolition!"
Issue by Candlewhisper Archive
Edited by The Marsupial Illuminati
by Alanis Star » Sat Apr 13, 2019 3:34 pm
• Valentine Z's first ever puppet.
• I really want to carry a kitten and pet it.
• A perfect balance between urban and nature.
• Ruled by a magical android from another dimension, always cheerful and smiling.
•Northern Ateria wrote:"Aww, you [Clarissa] purr just like a little kitten..." - President Adamaris LeahHarleyMustang
Sapporo Hyperspace Riftgate Laboratory wrote:
> literally all NS nations that controlled the entire Earth ever, said in every place in NS possible, in every second since Max Barry created NationStates
by Trotterdam » Sat Apr 13, 2019 3:38 pm
by Valentine Z » Sat Apr 13, 2019 4:46 pm
Trotterdam wrote:What's the issue title/number?
♪ If you are reading my sig, I want you to have the best day ever ! You are worth it, do not let anyone get you down ! ♪
Glory to De Geweldige Sierlijke Katachtige Utopia en Zijne Autonome Machten ov Valentine Z !
(✿◠‿◠) ☆ \(^_^)/ ☆
♡ Issues Thread ♡ Photography Stuff ♡ Project: Save F7. ♡ Stats Analysis ♡
♡ The Sixty! ♡ Valentian Stories! ♡ Gwen's Adventures! ♡
• Never trouble trouble until trouble troubles you.
• World Map is a cat playing with Australia.
by Valentine Z » Sat Apr 13, 2019 4:52 pm
Trotterdam wrote:Do you have issue notices turned on?
♪ If you are reading my sig, I want you to have the best day ever ! You are worth it, do not let anyone get you down ! ♪
Glory to De Geweldige Sierlijke Katachtige Utopia en Zijne Autonome Machten ov Valentine Z !
(✿◠‿◠) ☆ \(^_^)/ ☆
♡ Issues Thread ♡ Photography Stuff ♡ Project: Save F7. ♡ Stats Analysis ♡
♡ The Sixty! ♡ Valentian Stories! ♡ Gwen's Adventures! ♡
• Never trouble trouble until trouble troubles you.
• World Map is a cat playing with Australia.
by Jutsa » Sat Apr 13, 2019 5:41 pm
by Verdant Haven » Sat Apr 13, 2019 9:16 pm
by The Free Joy State » Sat Apr 13, 2019 10:02 pm
Jutsa wrote:Hopefully the person who reports option will report a name (or if not, maybe someone else, or even a kindly editor... )
by Bears Armed » Sun Apr 14, 2019 3:35 am
Alanis Star wrote:Description: Leonard Messy, one of the greatest footballers to have ever played for West Clarissa’s Land Of Happiness And Cheers Albion Football Club, is adored by fans and rivals alike. So much so that many enthusiasts of the game proclaim him as ‘God’. This verbal sacrilege has angered the believers of Peaceful Religion of Happiness and Joy, who have come to you for help to end this blasphemous talk and to save Alanis Star from sin.
The Debate
[choice 1] “How dare they proclaim a mere mortal as a god!” snarls believer Jenna Fellow, angrily pummelling your desk with her fists, as puce-coloured veins throb in her temples. “We need to teach them respect for the tenets of our religion: build some jails, throw them in the cells and throw away the key.”
[choice 2] “Messy is almost as handsome a specimen as me!” opines your vain assistant Shigeru Matsenjwa, checking his most recent hairstyle in a mirror. “Launch a campaign, encouraging everyone to spend time and money on their personal grooming. We’d all be so preoccupied with ourselves we wouldn’t notice, let alone worship, a false god.”
[choice 3] “This is too much trouble,” sighs your secretary, as she slouches across her desk, ignoring some documents marked ‘urgent’. “Let’s face reality here: Messy is adored as a god and any action you take won’t change that. Even after he retires from the game, he’ll still be revered. Just save your energy; go with the flow and accept Messy’s godlike... whatever.”
[choice 4] “Let’s use this to make some money,” grins well-dressed local minister Susie Solo, who owns an incredibly expensive house. “We should invite this Messy person to our houses of prayer.His popularity will double the attendances, then we pass around extra large donation bags. We’re going to make a fortune!”
[choice 5] “Messy and the Albion always win everything, while we languish at the bottom of the table,” pouts your brother, a fan of rival team Clarissa’s Land Of Happiness And Cheers Wanderers F.C., as he weeps over last weekend’s results. “Get some thugs to break his legs; finally end his godlike status AND his playing career. Then my beloved Wanderers might win something!”
[choice 6] “Messy is sooo dreamy,” announces your niece, as she drools over a poster of him. “Who cares about football? I only care about his six-pack abs! Persuade Messy to focus more on modelling by offering him lucrative contracts to pose topless for roadside billboards. When people see his rippling muscles, they will not see him as a god, but as an Adonis!”
[choice 7] “Let’s end this sacrilege by enticing Messy with copious amounts of food,” scoffs your uncle, stuffing his face with the biscuits on your desk. “Provide the finest food at his hotel rooms and training facilities. He’ll soon turn into a portly specimen, won’t be able to play the game any more and then no one will call him ‘God’. Problem solved.” Letting out a huge belch, he snatches your plate of scones.
Issue by Baggieland
Edited by The Free Joy State
[choice 0] is missing.
by Furry Things » Sun Apr 14, 2019 4:25 pm
Apabeossie wrote:I got #1198The Death Debate Isn’t Dead Yet
The Issue
After an investigative journalist broke a story about a widow who had kept her deceased husband’s body in her house for over a year, a debate has arisen on how soon a body should be buried after death.
The Debate
“This is a public health nightmare,” exclaims Karl Warner, your Health Minister, while covering his face with a perfumed handkerchief. “A body that isn’t cremated or buried poses serious health risks for the entire neighbourhood. We must require all bodies to be disposed of within a week. We can’t just keep grandpa in his favorite chair forever, can we?”
“Not so fast!” shouts rights advocate Preeti Cummings. “People have a right to mourn the loss of a loved one however they like, and it is none of the government’s business to regulate the grieving process. That lady was only keeping her beloved husband’s body in her living room while friends and family paid their respects — hey, he was a popular guy! The right to send off a loved one as per your beliefs should be held sacrosanct.”
“There has to be a solution here and I’m sure we can work it out,” declares George Starr, the owner of the largest beetle farm in Apabeossie, as he places a beetlearium on your desk. “If the government could subsidize my enterprise, then the bereaved can have my beetles strip the flesh off of their loved ones, allowing them to keep the bones for as long as they like. No more health risks, no more nasty smells, no more government interference during this most personal of times.”
The Death Debate Isn’t Dead Yet
The Issue
After an investigative journalist broke a story about a widow who had kept her deceased husband’s body in her house for over a year, a debate has arisen on how soon a body should be buried after death.
The Debate
- “This is a public health nightmare,” exclaims Mia Rikkard, your Health Minister, while covering her face with a perfumed handkerchief. “A body that isn’t cremated or buried poses serious health risks for the entire neighbourhood. We must require all bodies to be disposed of within a week. We can’t just keep grandpa in his favorite chair forever, can we?”
- “Not so fast!” shouts rights advocate Thomas Zhimo. “People have a right to mourn the loss of a loved one however they like, and it is none of the government’s business to regulate the grieving process. That lady was only keeping her beloved husband’s body in her living room while friends and family paid their respects — hey, he was a popular guy! The right to send off a loved one as per your beliefs should be held sacrosanct.”
- “There has to be a solution here and I’m sure we can work it out,” declares George Starr, the owner of the largest beetle farm in Furry Things, as he places a beetlearium on your desk. “If the government could subsidize my enterprise, then the bereaved can have my beetles strip the flesh off of their loved ones, allowing them to keep the bones for as long as they like. No more health risks, no more nasty smells, no more government interference during this most personal of times.”
by Verdant Haven » Sun Apr 14, 2019 8:35 pm
Furry Things wrote:Looks like George Starr is a fixed name.
by The Super Spoon » Mon Apr 15, 2019 7:39 am
The Only Good Criminal
The Issue
Following your endorsement of masked vigilante justice, costumed heroes have been waging war on the criminals of The Super Spoon. A few nights ago, the masked vigilante known only as Slasher tracked down the Hungry Hippo Gang, an infamous donut-counterfeiting ring. He delivered justice with extreme prejudice, killing the miscreants with his trademark long razors, and leaving the gang literally in pieces.
The Debate
1. “Now don’t get me wrong, I appreciate Slashy-washy was trying to serve the public good, but taking life is a line that a true hero can never cross,” explains family-friendly spandex-clad superhero The Rubber Waffle. “There’s an unspoken code of honour amongst vigilantes! Maybe though, an unspoken code isn’t doing the job, and what we need is a written set of rules governing vigilantes. For great justice!” The do-gooder turns to a nearby camera, and takes a swig from her carton of Justice Milk™.
2. “I don’t see nothin’ wrong with what ole Slash is doin’,” mutters the claymore-wielding Crime-Cleaver. “Us vigilantes are scarin’ criminals senseless, I see no reason to view that as a bad thing. Besides, there’s no better way to stop a lifetime of crime than by stopping a scumbag’s heart! Heck, why not let vigilantes kill all the criminals? That’ll soon bring law and order to these mean streets.”
3. “I think the real crime here is those crazy costumes,” snickers one of your aides. “Actually, the real problem is the people in the costumes. It’s about time we put an end to this vigilantism experiment. Let’s have policemen handling crime again, delivering justice with a side order of common sense.”
Author:The Planetary Alliance of Jutsa
Editor:Candlewhisper Archive
by Trotterdam » Mon Apr 15, 2019 8:40 am
And here we go.Trotterdam wrote:The other version of this issue is for nations that enforce @@FAITH@@, rather than atheism.
#1197 Aflame With Indignity
The Issue
To protest your government's antagonism towards his religious beliefs, High Priest @@RANDOMMALENAME@@ of the Tranquility of Yellow sat down on a busy street corner this morning, doused himself with fuel, and set himself on fire.
The Debate
1. "We have witnessed a martyrdom — but you are responsible for his death!" proclaims the jaundiced Brother @@RANDOMMALENAME@@, whose yellow robes give off the stench of sweat and desperation. "Our temples are being shut down. Our monasteries are looted and ransacked, while our people are beaten for speaking out against it. You must end this persecution of minority religions. We only want to practice our beliefs in peace."
3. "Dude! That dude just burned himself to death! He didn't even move a muscle the whole time!" remarks witness @@RANDOMNAME@@, mouth still agape in shock. "If that's the sort of thing that adherents of other religions do, maybe the government is right about not supporting their nonsense beliefs. We obviously need way more mental health support and suicide prevention funding to help these people."
5. "Let them burn, and we shall clap our hands!" exclaims @@RANDOMNAME@@, a fervent believer of @@FAITH@@. "If more Yellowists want to burn themselves, I'll provide the matches. But it is clear that they will soon turn their rage outward. Suppressing their 'religion' was not enough; it has just incensed them! We must get the heathens before they get us. Now is the time to finally round up all of those who don't believe the true faith and expel them from our great nation. It will be a new golden age for my... I mean, our religion!"
Issue by Pogaria
Edited by The Marsupial Illuminati
by Six Flags » Mon Apr 15, 2019 12:57 pm
The Issue
Having already attended to all your appointments, made a few important decisions, and dismissed several small matters, you have nothing left to do and have turned to your mail. Your secretary, Chip Leach, shows you a little letter with a heart on the envelope that he’d like you to look at.
The Debate
“Hi! My name’s Iris, I’m five (but am often mistaken for five-and-a-half). I wanted to thank you for being my leader. Love, Iris,” your secretary reads aloud, his lower lip wobbling. “That is so sweet! Leader, we have to read these more. If you don’t, then I certainly will. Don’t you want to hear how great you’re doing while you’re solving the nation’s problems?”
Accept
“What a snot-nosed brat,” sneers your grumpy Uncle Severus, before spitting in the message’s general direction and staining your shoes. “This mail is so sickening! You have better things to attend to than some ‘fan mail’. Besides, what if one of those opposes your leadership? You’d probably pout all day and get nothing done. Make those letters useful; use them as fuel for the fire.”
Accept
“If you ask me, this is a very important issue,” declares your Minister of Telecommunications, giving you another thick report with too cheerful a smile. “I think it’d be a great show of integrity to take time off and read these letters out loud and to the public — not all of them, mind you. But get a balance of good and bad. That way, the populace will know that they’re being heard. Plus, you never know, an important national issue might be raised in one of those letters.”
Accept
“Let’s not waste an opportunity here,” muses your Minister of Propaganda, confiscating all of your mail. “We should look through these letters and find the ones that best compliment you. If we run dry, we can always make up some names and come up with something appropriately flattering. We’ll replace subversive newsreaders and journalists with smart governmental spokespersons, and let them repeat the wonderful truth about you regularly. Reprint the best letters in all newspapers, and run a competition with prizes for the most fawning... honest citizen. That way everyone will know how great a leader you are!”
Accept
Dismiss This Issue
Issue by The Planetary Alliance of Jutsa
Edited by The Free Joy State
by Jutsa » Mon Apr 15, 2019 1:44 pm
by Trotterdam » Mon Apr 15, 2019 2:43 pm
#1200 1. "How dare they proclaim a mere mortal as a god!" snarls believer @@RANDOMNAME@@, angrily pummelling your desk with @@HIS/HER@@ fists, as puce-coloured veins throb in @@HIS/HER@@ temples. "We need to teach them respect for the tenets of our religion: throw them in the cells and throw away the key."The difference is No Prison.
by Kylarnatia » Mon Apr 15, 2019 3:45 pm
Land Without Shrimp wrote:-snip-
#1199: Locked Down
The Issue
Following the capture of suspected terrorist @@RANDOMMALENAME_1@@, the @@NAME@@ Bureau of Investigation was stymied in its investigations by being unable to gain access to the suspect’s smartphone.
The Debate
[Choice-0] “The data on this phone could be critical to saving lives from future terrorist attacks,” growls Bureau Director @@RANDOMNAME@@, staring at the locked-screen wallpaper on the phone, which shows the suspect raising his middle finger. “There may be contacts of other terrorists, bomb locations, secret plots, the works! The only thing standing in our way of beating those terrorist scum is that pesky passcode that Pear Inc. puts on their phones. Oh, and the retinal scan lock. And the fingerprint scan. The law should oblige people to unlock their phones when the police order them to, and smartphone manufacturers should be forced to put a government backdoor into their devices. National security is at risk!”
[Choice-1] “We’ve spent decades protecting the privacy of our users by encrypting their data, and breaking that would be a massive breach of people’s right to privacy,” objects the CEO of Pear Inc Steve Task, putting the finishing touches on a data-collection algorithm for targeted advertising. “The government can’t be trusted — you’ll be spying on whoever you want, even law-abiding citizens. In fact, a back door would make our devices more vulnerable to terrorists and hackers. Besides it’s a basic civil right for crime suspects to not be forced into self-incrimination by the state: you and the police should not be allowed to force Mr. @@RANDOMMALENAME_1@@ to unlock his phone.”
[Choice-2] “The rights of terrorists are over-valued,” mutters Counter Terrorism Officer Jacqueline Bower, picking up a pair of pliers and a vial of acid. “Give me 24 hours with this creep, and I’ll not only have his phone unlocked, I’ll also make sure he’s told us everything he knows.”
Issue by Queen Yuno
Edited by Candlewhisper Archive
The Ancient Empire of Kylarnatia // Imperium Antiquum KylarnatiaeI write mostly in PMT-FaNT, and I enjoy worldbuilding and storytelling. Any questions? Ask away!
Lord of Gholgoth | Factbook (Work in Progress) | Embassy & Consulate Programme
"Kylarnatia is a rare Nile platypus." - Kyrusia
by Trotterdam » Tue Apr 16, 2019 9:12 am
#1201 Tell Me Sweet Little Lies
The Issue
Your Chief Milk Officer recently confessed to the heinous crime of leaking the location of the strategic chocolate reserve. The guilty verdict for the Chief Confectioner, once thought to be the perpetrator, has been overturned, and he is now free and back in your services. Over the course of the night's dessert, the confectioner's first since returning, you notice that he might have something to say when a large cake covered with piped lettering is brought out and set in front of you.
The Debate
1. The cake reads: "Remember when I was arrested and they made me take that lie detector test? Well, I have a fear of yes-or-no questions, so I failed. Polygraph tests are a bad way to investigate a suspect. They don't account for sweaty and anxious people. I shudder to think how others with a worse condition than mine can cope with this barbaric practice. Polygraph tests should not be allowed as admissible evidence in any legal proceeding, or no more treats for you!"
2. "This is a bunch of horse dung!" exclaims your Minister of Justice, gulping down a big piece of your cake. "Delicious! Despite the occasional outlier, like this situation, the polygraph reliably measures the indicators of a lie being told. It generally works. And just between us, assuming it is hogwash, it still would make perpetrators nervous and more likely to confess. If anything, make them the norm during interrogations."
3. "Oh come on! Next, you're going to use a crystal ball in our criminal investigations," jokes your Science Minister, dissolving the cake in an acid solution. "What we need to do is modernize our means of interrogation. With our advances in neurology, we may be able to develop a chip that measures the neural activity of its subject, giving us the ability to accurately determine if someone's telling the truth. Give us the funding, and be ready for a safer @@NAME@@!"
4. "Bah!" utters an old @@CAPITAL@@ police officer, who is on a diet. "If you ask me, these fancy gadgets are making the police too soft. Back in the good ol' days, we had a more hands-on approach and believe me, nothing brings honesty out of a liar better than some good old beatings."
Issue by Kurnugia
Edited by The Marsupial Illuminati
by Trotterdam » Wed Apr 17, 2019 9:46 am
#1202 A Timely InterventionOption 3 uses socialist language but is still available to non-socialist nations. This particular speaker just happens to be socialist.
The Issue
You and your cabinet are on a tour of the nearby @@NAME@@ Watch Factory, which has long been famous throughout all of @@REGION@@. The poor state of the factory — and its rapidly declining sales figures, carelessly left on the manager's desk — are clear for all to see. Shuffling by your side, the manager sighs: "@@LEADER@@, we've had some tough years here. But we don't know what to do to bring the good days back."
The Debate
1. "The issue here is competition from emerging technology," proffers your Minister of Science and Technology Dr. Jonathan Osterman, shaking his head at the sight of a dusty lathe. "These watches are outdated compared to the latest iPear models. We need a nuclear option to adjust the balance. Atomic clocks are well known for their accuracy, so what if we started producing atomic watches? The watches may be slightly bulkier than we're used to and our watchmakers will need some training in the correct handling of caesium, but with a little government funding and innovation in compact atomic design, our watch market will explode... erm, figure of speech."
2. "The solution is moving back in time, not forwards," muses your Minister of Culture @@RANDOMNAME@@. "Mechanical watches from Smalltopia are still very popular. They have 27 rubies throughout the movement. Rubies! They put jewels in their watches! Go back to the timekeeping of yesteryear, and cater to the luxury watch market. My Ministry will organize an annual @@REGION@@ Luxury Watch Expo to promote the watches on the international stage! Sure, mechanical watches aren't as accurate, and they will be more expensive, but to own a timeless piece of reproduction horological history? Truly priceless."
3. "Atoms? Jewels? Those watches would never survive a hard day's work," bemoans your Minister of Labor @@RANDOMNAME@@. "If a watch can't survive being hit by a hammer or cut by a sickle, then it is useless in the workplace. Focus on the mass production of cheap and indestructible watches, to equip the international proletariat with the tools they need to keep running on the same beat. It will take generous government subsidies to allow the factory to cater to a larger market, but all the workers of @@REGION@@ will thank you."
4. "The hour is at hand! This is the time of Violet!" shouts Violetist priest Ksenya Singh through an open window. "The time spent watching these evil little machinations would be better spent praising the almighty Violet! We must rid ourselves of this factory of evil, seeking and burning all its offspring; wherever it may hide in our land! Violet demands that the government ban and destroy every horological horror, for — as is written in the texts — there is no reason or rhyme, no meaning or time but by Violet's dread love!" The priest tries to light a match but is dragged away by your bodyguards.
Issue by The New California Republic
Edited by The Free Joy State
by Jutsa » Wed Apr 17, 2019 2:24 pm
by The Free Joy State » Wed Apr 17, 2019 10:59 pm
Trotterdam wrote:Option 3 uses socialist language but is still available to non-socialist nations. This particular speaker just happens to be socialist.
Option 4, though, is unavailable to some nations. It probably has to do with banning Violetism.
Option 1's speaker is nonrandom. I happen to be able to confirm that option 2 and 3's speakers are because I got the issue on two different nations. Option 4's is probably random too, but since I haven't confirmed it, it's just highlighted for now.
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