World Cup 85 || RP Thread

[The Jovannic]

The Jovannic continue good form with close match against Eshan and win against Alba and Cymru.

The Jovannic 2-3 Eshan: Why
The match started out well with Rivilia Yunsala smashing the ball into the crossbar. This is proceeded by a period of Eshan Dominance, with the ball being rocketed into our net once in the 29th. The Jovannic managed to reply in the 37th with a stylish play by Jin Tze and Sami Ning resulting in another Sami Ning goal. The second half started with another Eshan breakthrough when Nivario Wesh lost the ball in the penalty box. "A rookie mistake" as Nivario Wesh said after the match. The equaliser happened just 2 minutes later in the 58th minute, with Jovan Ilohil and Ianu Fathe with another 1-2 play, resulting in Jovan chipping the bamboozled Eshan keeper. However, the result went to Eshan when a late goal made the back of the net after some questionable defending. "We played well, just couldn't get the result in the end. We are playing against a higher ranked team, and we did well to give them a good fight" Gothal Mathee stated after the match.

The Jovannic 1-0 Alba and Cymru: NIVARIOOOO!!!!!! Revenge is served.
The first half was quite boring with Alba and Cymru's defensive plays. Not Loniel Messi's scoring potential was a challenge, but the chemistry of Raye and Kallin stopped him in his tracks. It was a stalemate, with both teams not budging. The second half looked to turn the same way but Nivario Wesh had other ideas. He sprinted up the field with the ball, cutting in and carving a space inside the stout Alba defence and blasting an amazing shot that curled into the top corner. "Amazing. There was no chance for anyone to even touch that. Revenge has been served!" Gothal Mathee smirks. "I just shot and it happened to hit it perfectly" Nivario Wesh said after the match. "I hope our team's form continues, it's getting good."

The Jovannic next match is against The Sarian. The miraculous comeback last match was nice to watch. "I've seen the Sarian recent review on our chances. I don't like being closed together. We going to show them to give us some respect" said Gothal Mathee. Fans will agree.

Starting Eleven
Mavin Tsuniki, Maruo Mulchaio, Raye Eng, Kallin Yustat, Nivario Wesh, Stocktain Lelop, Jin Tze, Thomas Behine, Sami Ning, Ianu Fathe, Jovan Ilohil

[Kelssek]

WORLD CUP QUALIFIERS
Langelier’s double helps see off Audiasania

Kelssek got back to winning ways at home as they notched their second win in a row against a lacklustre Audiasania side who found themselves in a hole after half an hour of play. Gabriel Lapierre was too much for the unknowns to handle as he created two goals in quick succession with his pace and vision, drawing a floundering defence out wide before playing through carefully weighted passes into space that Patrice Langelier and Cory Greenwood each converted into goals in quick succession. Complacency seemed to creep in after half time, allowing Audiasania to pull one back, but the team responded well to shut the game down again and Patrice Langelier pounced on a loose ball after Roman Torshen saw an effort cleared off the line to make sure Kelssek got the three points.

KELSSEK 3 – Langelier (12’, 77’), Greenwood (25’)
AUDIASANIA 1 – [redacted] (56’)

Kelssek: Gallagher, Dumont, Pokorný, Fourtin, Farahani, Dionne, Greenwood, Lapierre (Blueman 59’), Champetier, Langelier, Wylten (Torshen 55’)
Player of the match: Gabriel Lapierre
Exhibition Place, Kirkenes (attendance 22,571)

---

Kelssek bounceback beats Barunia

Kelssek bounced back from a poor 3-0 loss against Cassadaigua that snapped their 11-match unbeaten run to earn a vital victory against Barunia. The 4-3 result puts Kelssek back on track in the qualification race, hanging on the second place qualification spot with a four-point advantage over Timuria.

Kelssek were forced into an early substitution after Ruslan Demetriev flew into an aerial challenge with Thomas Elwin and came off the worse from it. As it turned out, Rémy Dionne was exactly the spark the midfield needed and he quickly played a through ball for Brayden Custworth, who did well to finish past an onrushing John Taylor. Dionne then doubled the advantage minutes later when he won the ball off Neville Swan, and then popped up at the other end to collect an incisive pass from Colm Ó Tuathail and fire the ball into the roof of the net.

Ronald Moreno kept things interesting off a set piece when he got forward to chest down a free kick and blast the ball into the net just past the hour mark. Colm Ó Tuathail restored the two-goal advantage by poking in a ball whizzed across the six-yard box by Shaheen Taleb. But Barunia were determined to stay in the qualification fight and Sara Moorhouse pegged the Voyagers back again when she made the most of poor marking to put a composed finish beyond the reach of goalkeeper Kai Poirier.

Loïc Maçon-Petrault rattled the crossbar with a header from 15 yards before Rémy Dionne restored a two-goal lead as Kelssek caught Barunia on the counter-attack. Neville Swan then scored at the 90-minute mark to set up a tense finish. He tucked away the rebound after Poirier was only able to parry Thomas Elwin’s powerful shot from point-blank range.

The table was set for a nailbiting five minutes of stoppage time but Kelssek had no interest in having any excitement. Kelssek worked to kill the game by taking the ball to the opposite corner and making a late substitution to the discontent of the frustrated home fans. Cynical as the finale might have been, they take a vital three points against a key challenger for the precious second place in the group.

BARUNIA 3 – Moreno (64’), Moorhouse (74’), Swan (90’)
KELSSEK 4 – Custworth (39’), Dionne (41’, 83’), Ó Tuathail (70’)

Kelssek: Poirier, Liadon, Fourtin, Halliger, Douglass, Demetriev (Dionne 32’), Lapierre, Ó Tuathail, Champetier (Blueman 90’+3), Custworth (Maçon-Petrault 73’), Taleb.
Player of the match: Rémy Dionne
Sun Stadium, Porthaven (attendance 93,477)

[Cassadaigua]

The Royal Family: Princess Brianna,
by Hannah McCarthy, Concord Heights Times Historian

I hope that you have enjoyed the look at the Royal Family thus far in this series. It has been a pleasure to bring them to you while the first half of qualifying takes place for the 85th World Cup of Soccer, but there is still more work to do. Next up, we are moving to Princess Brianna, who is potentially a very relevant figure for the nation. If you are just beginning to read this series now, Princess Brianna is the oldest daughter of Princess Caitlyn. Princess Caitlyn was the oldest daughter of Queen Courtney I, who was the predecessor for the current Queen of Cassadaigua, Cassie II. Caitlyn would have been the Queen (and not Cassie II) if Caitlyn did not break a law (for more specifics on what Caitlyn did, you can check out a previous article in this series, and you can find other articles there as well) and see some jail time, a move that enabled then Queen Courtney I to legally declare that Cassie II would move ahead of Caitlyn and be her successor. That was a perfectly legal move, which was not disputed, not even by Caitlyn herself. However, here’s the issue: Princess Brianna was born before Caitlyn committed the act that saw her serve some jail time. She was also born four years before the oldest daughter of Cassie II, who is Cassie III. Therefore, when the time comes, it is expected that Brianna will dispute the planned coronation of Cassie III, claiming that because her mother was first in line at the time where she was the oldest female child, that she would be the rightful Queen. Presently, this is not talked about all that much since Cassie II is still just 61 years of age and in good health. Let’s take this moment, though, to learn a little more about Princess Brianna.

Throughout school, Princess Caitlyn was unfocused and enjoyed the fact that she thought she was going to be the Queen, leading her to have a bossy personality and often displaying power trips on teachers or other people who would normally be an authority figure on a teenage or a young adult, in order to get her way. At the elite Concord Heights private school that she went too, her grades were very mediocre, allowing her to pass, but not much more. Due to that, Caitlyn was unable to get into either of the main Concord Heights schools that Royal Family figures would typically attend as each of them both stated that they would not lower their academic standards even with Caitlyn being a future Queen. Therefore, Caitlyn would attend the small South Granby College, far from Concord Heights Times. While there, Caitlyn did improve her grades, but remained more concerned with the party life, and would play the field in regards to men. Her first pregnancy would result in an abortion, something that was criticized, but justified by Caitlyn since she did not know who the father was. At 24, she would get pregnant again, not knowing who the father was (it would later be discovered), and gave birth to young Princess Brianna.

Princess Brianna did not attend the same private school as most royal figures do in Concord Heights, but still attended a similar but more of a low profile school in South Granby. While she was in kindergarten, her mother committed the assault on her kindergarten teacher that would eventually see her serve five years in jail. For Brianna, this meant she would grow up while her mother was in jail. Her father was discovered through paternity tests to be a man named Shawn, who was a bartender at the time of her conception. However, once it was discovered that he was the father of Brianna, he was able to quit his job knowing that he would be set for life financially. To his credit, he did all he could to be a responsible father, and was a respectable person.

Things were not normal for Brianna in her elementary years because this school was not equipped to be teaching a royal like her. The school in Concord Heights is used to this, having an established protocol to deal with the Royal Family. This school in the small city of South Granby would have never planned to have something like this. Brianna knew this, and would begin to realize that she could get whatever she wanted by reminding teachers and other staff members of her status. She would save this demanding personality towards authority figures, and was actually very friendly to all of the kids in her class, not exhibiting any traits of bullying behavior towards any of them. The power she had on teachers was something she enjoyed, and her classmates would egg her on. Unlike the school in Concord Heights, where the administrators would report the problematic behavior to the Queen and hope that it would be corrected, the administration at this school was intimidated and did not report it under the assumption that they would have to bear it. After all, they remembered what happened when Caitlyn assaulted the kindergarten teacher. Caitlyn was released from jail while Brianna was in sixth grade and tried to make up for lost time.

As Brianna got older, her bossy behavior began to settle down. Caitlyn was a changed person after she was out of jail, taking it to heart that she had failed her mother and looked to become a much better person. With this, she became very strict on Brianna’s behavior, which was a lot like her own in her early years. Caitlyn would remind Brianna that she would have a claim to the crown one day, and that she would want to generate as much support in the future for the claim, so it was imperative to have people thinking positively of her now. This seemed to hit home for Brianna, and her grades would improve dramatically throughout junior high school and in high school itself. In school, she would play on the soccer team, and was the leading scorer of her team for three years. Teachers in high school would commend Brianna for her attitude and overall behavior. Marilyn Hogeboom, her 11th grade Physics teacher told us, “When I had Brianna in class, I had a young lady who took her studying very seriously. She got all of her assignments done on time and she was very eager to learn. She was a good kid. I am not going to get into the rules of royal succession, but I don’t think the nation would be in bad hands with her on the throne.”

Brianna’s success in high school led her to get accepted into the University of Concord Heights, but at the last minute, she opted not to go there saying, “If you didn’t want my mother, you can’t have me.” Instead, she would go to Grande Mountain University, which is one of the most reputable schools in the nation despite being known for its troubling history surrounding men’s rights. Brianna was very supportive of men’s rights, actually in a very strong manner, since she grew up in early years with just her father raising her. That allowed her to become very respectful of the plight of men, and she would often express vocal support towards Male Equality Now (MEN). Part of the reason she was interested in Grande Mountain University, she said, was to see how the school has evolved from its past and into the present. GMU has done a lot to put its past behind it, and Brianna was able to see that first hand. She also convinced her mother, and reportedly also with help from Queen Cassie II, to provide a large donation to Seth Johnson University, the Grande Mountain school named in honor of Seth Johnson, the man seen as being central figure in the men’s rights movement due to the terrible pain and tragedy that he had endured. Brianna gave passionate speeches in support of men’s rights throughout her time at GMU, and thrived academically. While a senior, she would meet Tyler, and they would get married just two years later. Brianna is presently 31, and has three kids: Anthony (6), Tara (4), and Tyler, Jr. (1).

With Brianna’s expected claim to the throne, some could think that she does not have a positive relationship with Queen Cassie II and her family, but that is really not the case. Caitlyn and Cassie II have a good relationship these days, and Brianna’s mother governs the South Granby area now. A couple years after Brianna graduated, she was assigned portions of the Grande Mountain area to govern, and there are no reports of any issues with her leadership, or in her reporting of things to Queen Cassie II when necessary. Some feel that with Brianna in charge of the Grande Mountain area, that the slow to evolve to men’s rights progress region has improved dramatically. Brianna has not talked much about her plans to lay a claim to the throne other then to say, “My mother was next in line when I was born, which at the time made me the first in line to be Queen. It may have changed for my mother, but that does not mean it changes for me.” When pressed for more comment about how she would challenge this, Brianna insists that it will be, “A claim to the crown that is legally and respectfully done in full accordance to Cassadagan law and nothing else.” She goes on to frequently mention, when pressed, that now is not the time to have this discussion because her aunt, Cassie II, is in good health and should be fully supported at the nation’s leader.

In regards to the children of Queen Cassie II, Brianna does not have a negative relationship with any of them, and probably gets along better with Princess Chelsea then she does any of the other ones. Her relationship with Cassie III, who she disputes as being the next in line to throne is not strained, but the two are not seen together all that much. From an outsider’s standpoint, it looks like they both just carefully watch one another’s steps when near the other, but are still able to get along when they need to. Each have been on record saying that any claim to the crown in the future will be handled by the courts, and have each stated something along the lines that the nation would be fine under the leadership of the other.

We hope you enjoyed this look at the Princess who could be Queen one day. It has been a pleasure to bring it you. Remember, we still have plenty more to read here on the Concord Heights Times website, including Chelsea Dufresne’s World Cup qualifying reports. Thank you for reading!

---

Cassadagan Goal Scorers vs Audiasania: Eddie Malone (11'), Zack Pierce (30'), Rachel Schanke (37'), Ashley Dahlin (81')

Cassadagan Goal Scorers vs Timuria: Uh, nevermind.

[Blouman Empire]

THE EMPIRE TIMES

Eagles Lose In Seven Goal Thriller

The Blouman Empire led three times during the match but lost it every time to go down 4-3 against Fujai at Nykanalstadion. The Eagles took the lead in the 30th minute when a corner was flicked on by Issac Cupstran and fell to John Miller who turned and fired home from six yards. But Fujai equalised six minutes later when Xavier Michaud put a low cross into the box from the right, it was David Parson who put his leg out to prevent it falling to the Fuaji forwards but bounced off his leg the wrong way and ended up in the back of his own net.

Fujai had a great chance to take the lead only 90 seconds into the starts of the second half when Parson was adjudged to have fouled Solfrid Hellam in the six-yard box but Henry Polinior saved the penalty taken by the aggrieved party. Luke Cousin pulled up early while making a run toward goal giving up the opportunity to go one on one against the Fujai keeper after a through ball from Cupstran, he was taken off a few moments later with a pulled hamstring. It was substitute Oliver Eastall who only needed three minutes on the pitch when, in the 53rd minute, a cross from Brad Hunter was pushed out of the box by Anton Felland only for Eastall to latch onto it and put the visting side back in front who headed home to put Lincoln ahead again. It was the 68th minute for Fujai to level the scores after Hellam rifled home a wonder goal from 25 yards to level the scores. With the back and forth game, the Eagles regained the lead in the 76th minute when Michael Relston’s corner was headed home by Cupstran. The lead only lasted two minutes after Michaud did the hard work and fed the ball to Arin Salberg who easily slipped it past Polinior. With the clock counting down through the three minutes of injury time it was Michaud that managed to get through the Blouman defence and fire the ball into the bottom left corner giving his team the lead and the win.

The Eagles will next face Jamestownnnn at home as they continue to push through the qualifiers. The last time the two sides faced it ended in a goalless draw and is a match that manager Lewis Parry has stated he will be looking to get the points over this time.

[Busoga Islands]

The Busoga Chronicle
The Islands #1 News Source!

One defensive chess match and one 10 goal thriller equal two wins for the Busoga Islands in the second half of World Cup Qualifying


A Busoga Islander player fights for the ball in World Cup Qualifier

LAKISKA, SOUTH ISLAND- World Cup Qualifying has always been known as a marathon. It has its ups, it has its downs. It takes years of time, tens of thousands of miles, plenty of games. And this campaign, out of the five our country has participated in, has been the longest yet. It's 24 games across 26 matchdays, 15 groups of 13 with the top two entering the Finals. An incredibly large number of teams. And yet, of course, we have quite a chance to try and make the Finals for the first time. But who knows? We have 10 games left- a lot can happen over ten games. We know who the competitors are, but it's no guarantee those who are competing for a World Cup spot now will be able to hold on to their hat over the last half of World Cup Qualifying.

First, let's go back to our last two Qualifiers. To open the second half of World Cup Qualifying, we took a flight to 12th place Balaslandia. We were the favorites, certainly- but there's nothing guaranteed with the Busoga Islands. The team has been known to be inconsistent at times even against lower-quality opponents. The fact that we've beaten them once before during this World Cup Qualifying campaign is almost irrelevant- it's a new day, it's a new game. They won't be going to the Finals- but they've got as good of a chance as anybody of simply playing spoiler in the second half of World Cup Qualifying, especially at home. And why not against a reeling Busoga Islands side?

This was a defensive chess match between the two sides. The home side played a 4-4-2, and really put 11 players behind the ball. They were determined to not concede, while the Busoga Islands were out here, trying to do everything they could to break down their opponents. As the game went on without a goal, the nerves started to rise on the Busoga Islands side. We were holding the lion's share of the possesion, breaking the 60% mark, but we could not find a way past their goalkeeper. Until, of course, the 77th minute. Sarika Birla had come into the game at the 65th minute mark for Amitabh. An overhead through ball was played to her by Utpal Ishan, and Sandy Salvador, an opposing defender, had mistimed the offside trap, leaving Birla behind the back line and onside. With the goalkeeper closing in, she thunderously volleyed home. It was 1-0, and that would be the final score.

A gritty three points for the Busoga Islands. Bethany Donnell said it best. "There's not much time to dwell on this- we've got a game in Lakiska in a couple of days against a very talented Wreckeria side. But being able to achieve a double in World Cup Qualifying is not easy- and we've done it. All you can ask for, sometimes, is three points in whatever form they come, and they came today. No time to celebrate though- we've gotta keep marching forward." And they did. They now played a home game in Lakiska, and they would host none other than Wreckeria. The game in Wreckeria was high scoring, when the Busoga Islands escaped with a 4-2 home victory. And now, this was even crazier- a 10 goal thriller.

The exact opposite of the Busoga Islands game just a few days ago. And yet, another win. Fast paced, up and down the pitch. A 3-3 tie at halftime. Goals galore. If you liked high scoring, pacey matches, this would have been the game for you. Chances everywhere. The defenses poor. Both wing backs pushing forward and leaving open huge swathes of space behind them. Bethany Donnell spoke about it in her post match press conference. "It was the type of game that was fantastic for neutrals, but aggravating for a coach. You never want to see your team give up four goals, especially in the manner that we did. However, on some nights, three points are three points, and we did a great job of creating chances, and an even better job of finishing them. Six goals, all in open play- great work from the players."

The two wins that the Busoga Islands earned saw them create some seperation from the bottom of the table, and do some serious work in closing the gap at the top of the table. Of course, Kita-Hinode is a shoo-in for the Finals- six points up on the rest of the field, with a game in hand. But the race for that second spot is quickly becoming one of the most interesting Qualification races this entire cycle. You're talking about a great group of nations- Squornshelous Remnant States, from a nation with a rich World Cup history(aka, winners medals!). Drawkland, one of the few nations to make the World Cup on their first ever try. The Busoga Islands. And, of course, Kohnhead. Just 2 points seperate 5th place Busoga, from 2nd place Drawkland.

It means that we have a truly interesting race coming down the stretch. We have a bye on the next matchday. But after our bye, we have a huge pair of games coming up- our trip to the Squornshelous Remnant States, which will be Bethany Donnell's first time returning to the country since she was fired in World Cup 84 Qualifying. And then, we'll play host to Drawkland. Both teams we're competing fiercely with for that 2nd World Cup spot. One game at a time though, right? We'll have to make sure we're well rested, as both games of course will be extremely close, and certainly both mentally and physically taxing.

As always, go Busoga!

[Audioslavia]

Part 1 (Sue)
Part 2 (Sue)
Part 3 (Emanuel)
Part 4 (Sue)
Part 5 (Emanuel)
Part 6 (Emanuel)
Part 7 (Emanuel)
Part 8 (Emanuel)
Part 9 (Emanuel)
Part 10 (Emanuel)


Naturally, Emanuel had no idea where Yusuf was on Calorborne, or whether he was still on the island at all. He did, however, know the location of the old lady. He’d noted, with interest, a story on Calorborne’s only newspaper, The Hot Press a few years back. An old lady had been denied access to the courtyard of the very swanky apartment complex in which she lived by a doorman who had wanted to see proof that she lived there and, after she provided proof, accused them of being forgeries. The incident appeared in the newspaper the next day, and the guy had lost his job the day after. The old lady, from her picture in the paper, had been the unmistakeable Dolores Styrn. Emanuel knew the apartment complex. It was maybe a mile away on the other side of town, a place where wealthy immigrants (or ‘ex-pats’ as they called themselves) tended to stay. Not the sort of place you might expect a strange old local to live but then, as Emanuel knew, this strange old local had links back to Audioslavia and a big link to the man behind one of the most famous heists in Audioslavian history.

Emanuel got changed into the blacker of his black clothes and left his apartment.

Dolores Styrn’s apartment complex was called Forum Rise, named after a rich section of Cathair called Grand Forum. It was situated at the end of a cul-de-sac. Anyone taking the ninety degree left on Crossport Street would find themselves on a road that spiralled round to the left until it hit a dead-end. That dead end was a wrought iron fence at the front of a courtyard and was about three metres high with obvious spikes at the top. The fence was attached to a house on either side. These two houses had a front door on the inside of the fence and a ‘back’ door on the side of the house that fed onto the main street. Behind the fence, Emanuel noted that there were two buildings, about six storeys each, surrounded by the backs of other buildings. Between the two buildings was the entrance to an underground carpark that looked well-lit. The whole place was very well-kept. The sort of place where the ‘other’ half lived.

The front fence had a gate large enough for two cars to pass through when it was open. Next to the gate was a doorman in a small hut, reading a magazine. He wouldn’t have seen Emanuel standing in the shadows, twenty yards down the road.

So. How to get in?

Emanuel took a step back as a car ambled along the street. Just before it stopped in front of the gate, five lights illuminated the general area in front of the gate. A motion sensor. The driver wound down his window and bippity-beeped a card against a machine at the side of the road. A second after that, three cameras flashed brightly, illuminating the car perfectly from three angles as it took three photographs. One from the front-left, one from the back-left and one from the right. Anyone in, on or about the car and not hiding under the seat would be lit up like the Christmas decorations on the house of a douche. Emanuel watched as the gate opened slowly and the car glided into the complex and down into the garage. The gate slid shut, almost silently. The guy in the booth picked his newspaper back up.

It was a perfect operation. No costs cut here. The gate looked sturdy and didn’t make a sound, the place was well-lit, the security system seemed almost impenetrable. Almost. There were only three possible weaknesses that Emanuel could see. Firstly, the houses either side of the fence had doors that could feed two and from the complex, meaning a bit of well-executed lock-picking might work if only the houses weren’t clearly occupied at that moment. Secondly, the security guard probably wasn’t the brightest guy in the world - security guards rarely are - but then from Emanuel’s experience he knew that dumb security guards were harder to deal with than ones who thought they were smart. The dumb ones followed procedure, and the official procedures for dealing with trespassers into this complex were probably very well organized. The third weakness was stood to the right of the security guard’s booth, about fifteen feet behind the fence. It was in a position where the security guard probably wouldn’t see it. A green metal box. That would have to be his ticket inside.

Emanuel thought for a moment and looked around. The parts of the street not inside the complex were fairly basic houses with small front gardens. The lights were mainly on, but most houses had their metal shutters down, blocking the light, meaning he could stand here next to one of the houses and not be seen. The front garden of the house next to him had a trampoline, a skateboard and a water-pistol which looked about half-full.

‘Perfect’ thought Emanuel.

---

[EXCERPT FROM TRANSCRIPT: THE IDIOT PODCAST EPISODE 41]

DAFFODIL: So let's start with Group 1, Jeremy. Thursday night, Audioslavia win 1-0. Sunday afternoon, Audioslavia win 1-0. Would you like to continue last week's diatribe about the Bulls being inconsistent?

JEREMY: I think I'll have to change tack. Something like the football is the most boring thing I've seen since that Krytenian comedy night

DAFFODIL: Watching Audioslavia is like watching a Greek tragedy where football's oldest advisor slowly poisons it to death.

JEREMY: Honestly at this point the biggest tragedy is that I've been sitting on the headline Shorn Patterick for eight months now.

DAFFODIL: For the benefit of our viewers, Jeremy is trying to make a word pun in an audio format.

JEREMY: The Audioslavians will get it. You'll have to explain it for the Mrii listening. I can draw a picture in orange crayon for any Starblaydis watching.

DAFFODIL: So what about Sean Patterick now?

JEREMY: He... gets to keep his job for a few more weeks? He's been unlucky recently, I'll give him that, but getting past TJUN-ia was all his luck coming to him at once. They should have taken something from that game.

DAFFODIL: And New Lusitania?

JEREMY: The opposite. If you concede early against a team hell-bent on defending, you're shit out of luck. And speaking of shit out of luck, are you often caught with your pants down? Do you find running out of toilet paper annoying? If so, you should try new, improved Spray Away the Waste. It comes in its own easy-to-carry poop satchel and comes in a variety of colours. Order now with the code 'DROPPINCAKES' and they'll send you a limited edition Audioslavia National Team Poop Spray in the famous claret and green. I personally recommend the product as I often find myself without toilet paper in delicate situations and I've found that using Spray Away the Waste quickly and painlessly flakes off any undue fecal matter from my butt, and the rest can just be scooped up safely in your left hand and flung down the bowl, leaving zero residue! Once again, that's the code DROPPINCAKES to receive a limited edition Audioslavia National team Poop Spray.

DAFFODIL: That might be the most interesting product you've promoted on this show. The quality sponsors have really started rolling in since you got that award

JEREMY: Do you mean my World Assembly Commendation for Services to Honesty and Journalistic Integrity?

DAFFODIL: WACSHAJI

JEREMY: Call it by its full title.

DAFFODIL: I can't, I think my vocal cords would perform a mercy killing and strangle me mid-sentence if I did. You received a medal for this, did you not?

JEREMY: A medal? No it's a full on trophy! Here I'll...

DAFFODIL: No no, not again, we don't need to...

A loud *clunk* is heard

JEREMY: A foot high, that's thirty centimetres if you're foreign, made of gold. There's a diamond is well. Isn't it fantastic?

DAFFODIL: It's like the opposite of what a reward for journalistic integrity should be.

JEREMY: The opposite of being rewarded for journalistic integrity is doing a show with me.

DAFFODIL: That's.... very true actually. So when's the big day?

JEREMY: I haven't asked you to marry me

DAFFODIL: Not *that* big day. I mean, you promised to give it to a museum

JEREMY: And I will. I've set the date.

DAFFODIL: When?

JEREMY: I can't remember. The end of qualifying. Something like that. Either way, I'll enjoy it until then, and after that it'll be going in the Western Cathair Museum of International Soccer and other Sports

DAFFODIL: I find it fitting that that museum is called...

JEREMY: The Western Cathair Museum of International Soccer and other Sport?

DAFFODIL: ...'WC MISS'

JEREMY: Either way, this beautiful baby will be staying in my possession until then. I will not let it out of my sight. It's... it's so beautiful. It's my pride and joy.

A loud kissing sound is heard, inviting us to consider exiting the hell out of this conversation

[Cheergirls]

After returning home into her reality back in Cheergirls from The Holy Empire, Meghan Banks tried to comprehend everything that she saw there in the Dreamed Realm. She had tried to be a studious person in school, and would succeed there. In history, she would learn about all of the different places, but to see what she saw there, first hand, gave her a great appreciation for the diversity that exists not only in her country, or in our world, but on other planets and now, other realities. Many of her teammates felt the same way, like it was all some giant field trip coupled with a soccer match. However, for Meghan, the conversation the she had with Sir Barsanuphius the Bold was special. Then, she would receive a note from him, which made her smile, and she would save it forever.

There was some time to rest over the mid-qualifying period, but soon it would be back in action for the second half, and the team would prepare to head to Vlasisitan. Tara Milford’s mother had prepared a fresh batch of cocoa-bo milkshakes for the team prior to their departure, but Meghan Banks stood up in the room.

“No!” She exclaimed, as the team looked at her.

“We are going to prove that we do not need those! They might be delicious but Sir Barsanuphius the Bold might have a point. I do not want our campaign to have an asterisk beside it if it ever comes out that this is a performance enhancing drug. I want to go to a nation that I think we can beat anyway. We can defeat them! And I want the win to be because of what we were able to do, not because of what we might have had to boost our performance!” Meghan was not sure what the reaction of the team would be. After all, the milkshakes actually were quite tasty.

Daniella Catti stood up. “Yes! Meghan is right! We can beat them without needing any help if that is some kind of drug in here!”

Tara Milford then stood up, “Mom, I follow my captain!” Just then the whole team stood up in support of Meghan’s decision.

Tara’s mother shook her head, “All because of the backwards psychotic imbecile from The Holy Empire who thinks we live in a medieval time. You girls are crazy, do not let his warped campaign over an innocent substance that is absolutely delicious, and you know it. Don’t let him brainwash you!” However, the team would not budge, and Meghan insisted that the team would not give in. “Fine,” her mother stated, “the high school volleyball team has a game this afternoon too and they can have them.”

The team embarked on the flight to Vlasisitan, where Meghan read that the volleyball team, who previously had a record of 2-5, defeated their 6-1 opponent by the score of 25-7, 25-3, and 25-6. Banks shook her head about that result. Did she make a mistake in standing up for herself and for the team, or would the team rebound. Vlasisitan was not a good team, and she was confident the team would win. After falling behind 3-0 in the contest, the team was impressive in rebounding, scoring five unanswered goals to go up 5-3, and eventually winning 5-4. Meghan herself scored twice. The result, was satisfying. They didn’t need the milkshakes.

Upon returning to Hazel City, the team again had to hold off the wishes of Tara Milford’s mother who began making some outlandish social media posts directed towards Sir Barsanuphius the Bold. However, Meghan had the team rallying around her now. They would not give in to the pressure and hoped to show that they could win without cocoa-bo with regularity. Against Devonta, a much better team on paper, they were not the winners, but it felt like one after they played them to a 1-1 draw.

[Sarzonia]

Kevin Connelly wasn't going to answer any questions about Keaton Durbridge.

The Delaclav captain's absence on the pitch following Sarzonia's 5-3 victory over Delaclava at The Pride of Manchester in front of 110,000 didn't go unnoticed, but Connelly simply declined comment when asked by the assembled media.

He wouldn't even offer a milquetoast generic response excusing Durbridge because he was ultra-competitive. He wouldn't throw salt on a wound by condemning Durbridge. Truth be told, he only had one player on his entire squad who even remotely came close to that level of competitive nature. And Brady Reynolds was the type to at least attempt to demonstrate the sportsmanship that the most offended wags accused Durbridge of lacking.

"That's a question I think is better suited for Tim," Connelly said, referring to his Delaclav counterpart Tim Landers when asked about his thoughts on Durbridge leaving the pitch after the final whistle. "I have my own side to manage."

Stars captain Clayton Wilson also demurred to an extent, saying "Durbridge is a fiery player. We could all benefit from his example."

Even Reynolds, the Stars player most similar to Durbridge in demeanour, opted out of criticism.

"He's disappointed that his team lost," Reynolds said. "I'd be upset if we lost a match we expected to win as well."

The match couldn't have gotten off to a better start for Sarzonia even if the match were played in front of the friendly confines of Dave Wilson Stadium in Woodstock. There was Wilson winning a ball from Brent Richie and starting a textbook counterattack with Ernie Mabree and Jake Campos. Mabree successfully drew Valentin Gusev toward him before firing a deft pass to Campos. Campos calmly banged his shot past David Ross and the Stars were up 1-0 just two minutes in.

The Stars noted how the Manchester crowd largely fell silent, save for the navy-clad Stars supporters in attendance. They would further silence the "away" side's fans just three minutes later as Campos drew memories of Sarzonia's "total football on steroids" approach of years past by winning a ball from Delaclava's Pavel Cisak. He and Cayden Aguirre were off to the races, and this time, it was Aguirre who notched the goal and put the Stars out in front 2-0.

Wilson saw his Phoenixes counterpart Durbridge gather his teammates around him and began to do the same for his Stars team.

"If I know Keaton, he's going to light a fire under their arses," Wilson told his team in part. "We need to be ready for the onslaught they're going to launch at us." Wilson gave a couple of his teammates side-eye when he saw looks on their faces that betrayed the lack of seriousness they took Wilson's warning. Sixteen minutes later, as the defensive players watched Rhydian Campbell celebrate a goal with Donato Girardi, whose deft assist reminded many in the now explosively loud Pride of Manchester stands of Mabree's pass to Campos just 19 minutes hence, the players who inwardly scoffed now lowered their heads and stared at the pristine ground of the sparkling new stadium.

Now it was Reynolds' turn to wake his team up, lest the away team in name only wrested the now fragile momentum from the Stars. He would do so by playing aggressively, looking for ways to continually test Ross, forcing the Delaclav defence to chase the Stars around their defensive end. Finally, the probing and testing resulted in Reynolds notching an assist on Campos's second goal of the match in the 41st minute that would give Sarzonia a 3-1 halftime advantage. The teams reverted to a pattern of exchanging goals, good for the Stars, but not beneficial to the Phoenixes, as that meant Sarzonia won 5-3.

The reaction Durbridge had, walking on his own to his team's dressing room, was on the mind of Reynolds as the Stars were two-goals worse than Acronius in the away leg to the 75th ranked team in the multiverse. They could possibly excuse an early home loss to a team shrouded in mystery despite their rank just below Sarzonia's in Group 7, but with that match still in mind, Reynolds made it a point to draw inspiration from Durbridge and walk back to the away dressing room after Sarzonia lost 3-1.

Before Connelly could ask Reynolds why he didn't stay on the pitch with the rest of the Stars, Reynolds said it was time the Stars developed some of the classic fire and competitive fury that marked Stars teams of the past.

The ancient past, according to many countries who note the passage of time differently from Sarzonia, but a past that was some years ago by any account.

Connelly decided not to belabour the point. Perhaps it was time to draw inspiration from a Delaclav and call upon the spirit of Stars teams past. Otherwise, the Stars risk seeing their chances of qualifying for the proper go up like a cloud of smoke from the legal marijuana throughout Delaclava.

*  Group 7                                     Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Nephara                                      13   12   1   0    53    8  +45    37
 2 Jeruselem                                    14    9   2   3    37   22  +15    29
 3 Darmen                                       13    8   3   2    36   21  +15    27
 4 Sarzonia                                     14    8   2   4    34   29   +5    26
 5 Acronius                                     14    7   1   6    30   30    0    22
 6 Welzat                                       14    5   5   4    16   21   −5    20
 7 Delaclava                                    14    5   3   6    38   38    0    18
 8 Aimena                                       14    5   2   7    15   28  −13    17
 9 Simpralia                                    14    4   4   6    18   24   −6    16
10 Huayramarca                                  14    3   4   7    27   36   −9    13
11 Great Lausitz                                14    3   3   8    18   25   −7    12
12 Competitive Solitaire                        14    3   2   9    12   32  −20    11
13 South Charlia                                14    1   2  11    11   31  −20     5

SCHEDULE:
MD 1: @ Delaclava^ W, 6-4
MD 2: v. Acronius L, 0-2
MD 3: @ Simpralia (Glory Park, capacity 122,000) W, 5-3
MD 4: v. Welzat L, 2-4
MD 5: @ Nephara L, 1-4 (Farham Arena, Sabrefell, capacity 88,046)
MD 6: v. Great Lausitz W, 1-0
MD 7: @ Huayamarca (Estadio Olímpico del Oriente, Sechura, capacity 26,000) W, 4-2
MD 8: BYE
MD 9: v. Competitive Solitaire W, 1-0
MD 10: @ South Charlia W, 2-0
MD 11: v. Darmen D, 2-2
MD 12: @ Aimena W, 2-0
MD 13: v. Jeruselem D, 2-2
OFF DAY
MD 14: v. Delaclava W, 5-3 (game played at Pride of Manchester, capacity 110,000)
MD 15: @ Acronius L, 1-3
MD 16: v. Simpalia
MD 17: @ Welzat (Sir James Tretol Memorial Stadium, capacity 19,595)
MD 18: v. Nephara
MD 19: @ Great Lausitz
MD 20: v. Huayramarca
MD 21: BYE
MD 22: @ Competitive Solitaire
MD 23: v. South Charlia
MD 24: @ Darmen (Stadio Rushmore, Johnho, capacity 70,000)
MD 25: v. Aimena
MD 26: @ Jeruselem (Dazza Dallas Stadium)

^Match was played at Dave Wilson Stadium in Woodstock.

Note: Except for the match in Manchester, Delaclava, all of Sarzonia's home matches will be played at Dave Wilson Stadium in Woodstock, capacity 105,900.

[Eura]

emplor.eur/main/sport/football
INCONSISTENT EURANS LEAD QUALIFYING GROUP
Setbacks in several fixtures offset by wins elsewhere
Report by our Euran international team correspondent Isabel Haynes

After the final whistle blew on Eura’s twelfth game of qualifying, manager Michael Brandon praised his team for their “resilience” and claimed they had continued to demonstrate “the form that carried us to the Copa title”. Some critics might disagree. A thrashing of a now impressive-looking Astograth side, arguably qualifying’s biggest surprise package so far, was in hindsight a faultless way to start Eura’s pre-qualifying friendlies. But it was followed by an ineffectual performance in a goalless draw against Siovanija & Teusland, and then a hectic 5-3 win against Darmen that showed both Eura’s biggest strengths and most dangerous weaknesses. This proved to be a prophetic vision of Eura’s first half of qualifying; chaotic and inconsistent, with big rivals seen off but points dropped elsewhere, enough to put Eura in the driving seat of the group but by no means safe. Here we are looking back on the twelve matches, game-by-game.

MATCHDAY 1
Eura 2–2 Northwest Kalactin @ Bastion Arena, Bastion
Bond 33, 53 (pen)

This game was best interpreted by my fellow sports journalist Chris Peel at the Directus Post, writing beforehand that “Eura’s ability to dominate its qualifying group, as it did for World Cup 84, depends on beating teams like Northwest Kalactin without difficulty”. Kalactin are a good side but mid-ranking, and so the result in this game was a litmus test for whether Eura were going to be able to dominate this group, or have to fight hard to get through it. The newly crowned Copa Rushmori champions did not completely fail to live up to expectations, but they certainly didn’t exceed them either. A regular Euran lineup neither conquered nor folded on an anti-climactic night in Bastion.

Eura dominated the opening phases without taking advantage, and were left aghast as Will Sanders put the visitors ahead midway through the half with a tap in from a rebound. It was only a bit of Rhys Griffiths vision and Brian Bond’s power that ensured Eura would be level at half time, the former launching an incisive long ball in behind the defence that the latter got to first, lofting the ball over Wendell Jakerein and in. Bond then put Eura in the lead from the spot shortly after half time, only for the Kalactanians to smash and grab a point in the 83rd minute, Jack Flemister finishing in the midst of a goalmouth scramble.

MATCHDAY 2
Eshan 0–4 Eura @ a stadium in Eshan
Bond 17, 42, 65, Townsend 89

Away to Eshan was no doubt on Brandon’s list of fixtures that required particular preparation. They’ve been known to be a good side in the past. That preparation appeared to make Eura put in a much better performance than they did against the Kalactanians, though in truth the hosts in this match looked to be in disarray. The same lineup that struggled in the opening game dominated this one from start to finish, enjoying 71% possession and conceding only one shot on target, a hopeful long range effort easily saved by Kevin Belgrave. Bond was unstoppable, racking up a first half brace with his left and right foot, before completing a perfect hat-trick with his head – he had now scored all five of Eura’s first five goals of qualifying. The streak was broken only by substitute Anthony Townsend, who rounded the keeper to make it four late on.

MATCHDAY 3
Eura 1–0 Alba and Cymru @ Bastion Arena, Bastion
Bond 12

Eura face brand new opponents all the time, and this was their first of the campaign. Alba and Cymru were spirited in their performance in Bastion. However their limitations were obvious, and they did not recover from going behind in the 12th minute to Bond’s sixth goal in three games. Eura controlled the first half from that point without breaking a sweat, and the second half too, until the visitors had one rare chance. A light injury to Belgrave had seen Vance Simm come on to make an unexpected international debut in goal. He would be tested in the final few minutes when Seumas Colquhoun was left unmarked in the box, a rare lapse in defensive discipline. He shot high and to the left, however Simm was equal to it, stretching to deny Colquhoun acrobatically and ensuring Eura claimed all three points.

MATCHDAY 4
The Sarian 3–4 Eura @ De Stadionnational, The Sarian
Bond 27, Bowman 39, Underwood 67, Griffiths 70

It’s been a while since Eura have faced The Sarian. It was well worth the wait. This was an excellent game for the neutral, with the underdog home side putting up a real fight and they almost came away with something. All three of their goals were well taken, well worked efforts rather than products of Euran defensive lapses. Yet after conceding a 1-0 lead, Eura’s own offensive pedigree made itself known. Bond was on hand again to score, heading home from a Bowman cross, before Bowman himself got on the scoresheet from close range. The Sarian then pulled level on the brink of half time, and took the lead just after, leaving Eura reeling at 3-2 down. Brandon brought on a second striker, Dion Underwood. The veteran Bastion man slotted home an equaliser as the balance of the game shifted, before Rhys Griffiths landed a winning blow not long afterwards.

MATCHDAY 5
Eura 2–1 Chromatika @ Bastion Arena, Bastion
Fletcher 36, 60

Don’t let the scoreline fool you. Eura’s home tie against Chromatika was a quiet one despite there being three goals, a game of few chances where clinical finishing was key to the result. Bastion went awfully quiet when, in classic Eura fashion, they conceded first. It was a superb moment for Chromatika’s Jazmin Dragan as she scored from short range, a relief for the second seeds after what had been a dire qualifying campaign so far. But just as it is typical for Euran teams to fall behind, it is also a trait of theirs to come back from going behind. And so they did, thanks in large part to John Fletcher, rotated in for the injured Bowman with Bond pushed out to the left. First he equalised with a thumping header from a Moira Woakes cross, then he put Eura ahead with a cool and collected finish on the counter in the 60th minute after winning the ball himself. Belgrave had to make some decent saves to guarantee the win but the job was done.

MATCHDAY 6
Sabalonia 1–0 Eura @ a stadium in Sabalonia

Four consecutive victories had put Eura in a commanding position with only one game remaining before the crucial matches against Savojarna and Terre Septentrionale. All they had to do was beat Sabalonia. A slightly but not fully rotated Eura side, still easily good enough to win the tie, travelled to Sabalonia in high spirits. They did not translate this into a performance on the pitch. Eura were abject and uncreative, and failed even to salvage a 0-0 draw, going down to a soft goal from a free kick that Ryan Bull will not look back on fondly. It was a particularly bad day for Fletcher who had been rewarded for his previous performance with a start, or his substitute strike partner Morgan Fox. Between them they registered only two shots on target. This match was the beginning of Eura’s patchy form.

MATCHDAY 7
Eura 2–0 Savojarna @ Bastion Arena, Bastion
Woakes 51, Bowman 55

All was soon forgiven for the Stumble in Sabalonia as Eura dispatched Savojarna on an appropriately warm night in Bastion. It was the kind of ruthless and pragmatic display Eura were known for at the height of the Steve Thompson era, exhausting the disorganised visiting defence and keeping the talented Savojar forwards in check. Even Jashkin, based in Eura and a frequent tormentor of the national side in previous meetings, looked quiet against the wall of Eura’s first choice backline. Although Savojarna were able to avoid conceding in the opening period, their resistance eventually broke down to the benefit of Moira Woakes, ending her goalless streak stretching back ten games to the Copa Rushmori final with a breakaway run and beautiful finish. She must wish she could play them every week; no sooner had Woakes put to bed the drought, she delivered an inch perfect cross into the box from the right that a returning Bowman had no difficulty in tucking home.

MATCHDAY 8
Terre Septentrionale 1–3 Eura @ Stadion Hydro-Polnocna, Trzebiegoszcz
Bond 13, Woakes 40, Rowland 65

There’s been rumours recently that Monica Rowland is set to take the captaincy, the first woman to do so with the added drama that she’s previously captained the team of another country. The trip to Trzebiegoszcz was her best performance of the first half of qualifying, a mesmerising display of dominance in the centre of the park capped off by her scoring Eura’s third with a powerful strike from the edge of the area. Before that point it had been an uneasy game, with Bond giving Eura the lead in the 13th minute only for it to be cancelled out by a Fryderyka Cwierczakiewiczowa header in the 25th minute. Woakes then bagged her second goal in as many games to give Eura the lead before Rowland’s strike put the result beyond doubt.

MATCHDAY 9
Eura 3–3 Sanctanus @ Bastion Arena, Bastion
Coltrane 30, Underwood 55, Armstrong 87 (pen)

The visit of Sanctanus was taken as an opportunity for Eura to give the better substitutes a start, something they would have to do more often from this point with the long qualifying campaign lying ahead. Unfortunately the second string that came in looked unfamiliar with each other and were unable to beat Sanctanus, going behind twice to one of the group’s weaker teams and having to equalise late to avoid adding to Eura’s long record of inexplicable humiliations at home in qualifiers. Young Vance Simm struggled this time in goal despite doing well on debut, while the defence of Dean Steele, Samuel Hopkins, Steve Fox and Ben Hall looked shaky too. It was only the experienced hands in midfield and up front that saved the day. Coltrane, Underwood and Armstrong all found the net, Armstrong’s late penalty being the crucial equaliser.

MATCHDAY 10
Adyatin 1–3 Eura @ a stadium in Adyatin
Blake 18, Griffiths 28, Woakes s/o 61, Bowman 77

Eura overcame the disappointment of the previous result to beat Adyatin on the road, although they had to cope with ten players for a third of the game after Moira Woakes saw red for a stupid tackle on Andriy Skuranov (curiously, this makes her the first female player to be sent off for Eura’s “main” team).The visitors had established a 2-0 lead at half time, the goals coming from Harvey Blake and Rhys Griffiths. Then came a long period of calm before Woakes was sent off, which swung the game in the home side’s favour; they had a goal back within minutes courtesy of captain Ivan Yushchenko. Brandon read where the game was going well and set up to counter attack. Bringing on Underwood proved to be a masterstroke – his counter with Bowman in the 77th minute ended with the latter scoring into an open net to win the game.

MATCHDAY 11
Eura 0–2 The Jovannic @ Bastion Arena, Bastion

Without the suspended Moira Woakes and with a number of players looking exhausted at the peak of the season’s busy schedule, Eura underwent a full rotation this game bar Bull coming in rather than Simm – and lived to regret it. An ambitious Jovannic side played the game of their lives against Eura, coming to win rather than escape with a point and getting their deserved result. However it was a dreadful performance by Eura that even put the Sabalonia game to shame. Hopkins and Fox could be forgiven for thinking their international careers are over after particularly bad performances, while Bull – despite being a starter for club giants Brinemouth – must be thinking his chances of ever supplanting Belgrave or even Simm are now slim.

MATCHDAY 12
Wanarpu 3–6 Eura @ a stadium in Wanarpu
Bond 20, Fletcher 33, Woakes, 35, Bowman 45+1, Griffiths 61, Sutton 75

Eura would finish the first half of qualifying away from against Wanarpu, who sat very much at the wrong end of Group 3. However the Euran’s didn’t feel in high spirits themselves. They had beaten all of their main opponents at the top of the group and struggling second seeds Chromatika, but had also suffered two embarrassing defeats against theoretically weaker opponents and dropped points elsewhere. Manager Brandon showed his determination to reach the halfway point on a high note by fielding an experimental 3-5-2 in this match, with a back three of Steele, Blake and Roberts, a midfield five of Bowman, the returning Woakes, Griffiths, Rowland and Bevan, and Fletcher partnering Bond up front. As a defensive experiment this did not work very well – Wanarpu managed to score three goals against a disorganised Euran backline. Nevertheless it allowed the team the freedom to rack up six goals and win decisively. It was a case of one each in the end; Bond, Fletcher, Woakes, Bowman, Griffiths and substitute Sutton all got on the scoresheet.

GROUP 3 TABLE

-  Group 3                                     Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Eura                                         12    8   2   2    30   17  +13    26
 2 Eshan                                        12    8   0   4    19   15   +4    24
 3 Savojarna                                    12    6   3   3    17   14   +3    21
 4 Terre Septentrionale                         12    6   3   3    27   25   +2    21
 5 Northwest Kalactin                           12    5   4   3    31   29   +2    19
 6 The Sarian                                   12    5   2   5    22   21   +1    17
 7 Sabalonia                                    12    5   1   6    17   17    0    16
 8 The Jovannic                                 12    5   1   6    19   23   −4    16
 9 Adyatin                                      12    4   3   5    17   19   −2    15
10 Chromatika                                   12    4   1   7    24   24    0    13
11 Alba and Cymru                               12    3   4   5    11   15   −4    13
12 Sanctanus                                    12    1   6   5    22   26   −4     9
13 Wanarpu                                      12    2   2   8    18   29  −11     8

Player Stats: WC85 Qualifying MD1-MD12
Does not include pre-qualifying friendlies

1 - Kevin Belgrave - GK - 31 – Directus – 9 apps
13 – Ryan Bull - GK - 32 - Brinemouth (Nephara) – 2 apps
30 – Vance Simm – GK – 23 – Lajuno – 2 apps

2 – Scott Coles - RB - 34 – Ulsa – 8 apps
3 – Stanley Burns – LB – 25 – Holdenberg – 8 apps
4 – Charles Roberts - CB - 29 – Bastion – 10 apps
5 – Harvey Blake - CB - 31 – Spartangrad – 10 apps – 1 goal
15 – Dean Steele – CB – 26 – Brinemouth (Nephara) – 6 apps
19 – Samuel Hopkins - CB - 30 - Eastweald (Cosumar) – 2 apps
21 – Steve Fox – RB – 28 – Sabrefell Athletic (Nephara) – 3 apps
23 – Ben Hall - LB - 31 – Oakstone – 4 apps
25 – Jake Newton - CB - 27 - Baskita FC (Pasarga) – 3 apps
27 – Alex Ingram - LB - 23 – Spartangrad – 2 apps

6 – Monica Rowland (F) - CM - 29 – Bastion – 9 apps, 1 goal
7 – Oscar Coltrane - AM - 35 - Sabrefell Athletic (Nephara) – 4 apps, 1 goal
8 – Frank Bevan - CM – 29 – Holdenberg – 10 apps
11 - Damion Bowman – LW – 25 – Crisisbless (Nephara) – 9 apps, 4 goals
12 - Rhys Griffiths - AM - 29 – Revolutionaries – 10 apps, 3 goals
16 – Anthony Townsend - RM - 31 – Oakstone – 4 apps, 1 goal
18 – Vincent Robshaw - CM - 26 - Northern Union (Brenecia) – 4 apps
20 – Moira Woakes (F) – AM – 26 – Crisisbless (Nephara) – 10 apps, 3 goals
22 – Harry Humphreys – CM – 29 – Raynor City United (Valanora) – 4 apps
24 - Liam Armstrong - CM - 32 – 1830 Cathair (Audioslavia) – 5 apps, 1 goal
28 – Henry Patterson – CAM – 27 – Directus – 2 apps
29 – Freddie Wright – RW – 28 – Brigham – 2 apps

9 – Brian Bond - LW/ST - 29 – Oakstone – 10 apps, 9 goals
10 – Dion Underwood - ST - 35 – Bastion – 7 apps, 2 goals
14 – John Fletcher – CF – 30 – AFC Treason (Nephara) – 5 apps, 3 goals
17 – Morgan Fox - CF - 31 – Olask Islanders (Cosumar) – 2 apps
26 – Tommy Sutton - ST - 24 – Falourr – 2 apps, 1 goal

[TJUN-ia]

By Peter Davis

Welcome back to the Marathon Cup! The first two games in the "Quest For More Than 11 Points" have certainly created a lot of talking points in the TJUN-ian media and rightfully so. My name is Peter Davis, and let's see how Margaret rolled the dice.

Let's start in TJUN-ia City when the Jags hosted the Bulls of Audioslavia for the first time. This game showed one thing: both defences have gotten better over the tournament. Both the TJUN-ian back 4 and the Audioslavian back 5 were the true stars of this game, as goals were rare to find. The only goal came in the 67th minute by Bulls substitute Athanasios Lagrange, but that was really the only highlight of this game. Sean Patterick is certainly not safe by any means, but the pressure is easing. TJUN-ia's quest for a home win continues.

After that, the team travelled to Fligsive to take on "Skorji Oslograd's Merry Band of Footballers" - also known as The Expats from the Euran Oceania Territories. Skorjiball was effective at the start, with Joel Conway opening the day's scoring in the 14th minute. Skorji celebrated the best way he could - by ripping his shirt off and kissing the life out of his horse (yes, he still has the horse). But that would be the only good moment for the EOT and Skorji tonight. The Blue and Orange (in Orange and Blue) woke up after that goal and played like the best. Vladimir Podolov levelled the score in the 19th minute, with David Johnson of all people giving TJUN-ia a lead they wouldn't relinquish in the 37th. After half time the goals kept coming. Podolov scored his 2nd in the 57th and Archer Andrews put the exclamation point on this game in the 87th. Better from the Jags for sure and Skorji looked disheartened at the final whistle. He may be out of a job soon, and that would be a shame for this sport.

The Jags remain in 10th after those 2 games and are looking for revenge. Tiankong will host Porticalia, a team that beat the Jags in a tight game on MD3. After winning in a 12th vs 11th match-up, they now must do the same in a 10th vs 11th. GO JAGS!

---

SCHEDULE (Updates on stadiums will occur as soon as we get them)
MD1: @Audioslavia (22) - Arena Kirola, Cathair L 1-2 (T-9th)
MD2: vs Euran Oceania Territories (84) - National Stadium, TJUN-ia City D 2-2 (T-9th)
MD3: @Porticalia (330) L 0-1 (T-10th)
MD4: vs Sajnur (57) - Tiankong Stadium, Tiankong L 2-3 (12th)
MD5: @Jeckland (UR) - Jecken Stadium, Rack City W 2-0 (10th)
MD6: vs Natanians and Nosts (131) - Beregozera Stadium, Szensky L 0-4 (11th)
MD7: @Villablanca (235) W 6-1 (9th)
MD8: BYE (10th)
MD9: vs New Lusitania and the Algarves (42) - Beregozera Stadium, Szensky D 4-4 (10th)
MD10: @Necosia (341) D 4-4 (9th)
MD11: vs Turori (12) - National Stadium, TJUN-ia City L 1-5 (10th)
MD12: @Astograth (303) - Castle Hill, Gesterlake D 0-0 (10th)
MD13: vs Muradil (212) - National Stadium, TJUN-ia City D 2-2 (10th/2W-5D-5L/-4GD/11pts)
-----------------------Off Day---------------------------
MD14: vs Audioslavia (22) - National Stadium, TJUN-ia City L 0-1 (11th)
MD15: @Euran Oceania Territories (84) - Flynn Arena, Fligsive W 4-1 (10th)
MD16: vs Porticalia (330) - Tiankong Stadium, Tiankong
MD17: @Sajnur (57) - ?
MD18: vs Jeckland (UR) - Tiankong Stadium, Tiankong
MD19: @Natanians and Nosts (131) - Stadion Nacional (?)
MD20: vs Villablanca (235) - Beregozera Stadium, Szensky
MD21: BYE
MD22: @New Lusitania and the Algarves (42) - Estádio da Anta do Dragão, Porto
MD23: vs Necosia (341) - National Stadium, TJUN-ia City
MD24: @Turori (12)
MD25: vs Astograth (303) - National Stadium, TJUN-ia City
MD26: @Muradil (212)

[Timuria]

Convincing and Commanding

Timuria 6–1 Xuzaqiy
Volkan Ayhan (15), Ertan Renda (29), Ismail Burhan (37), Vatan Ercetin (44), Omer Tameroglu (63, 82);Xuzaqiy #10 (87)

by Tufan Nursultan

The Red Wolves kicked off the second half of the qualfiication period with a convincing win over Xuzaqiy at Demir-Is Stadium in the capital of Demir. The Red Wolves took an early lead and never looked in any danger of losing it as they ran out to a 4-0 half time lead before putting the match away with an Omer Tameroglu brace. The only disappointment will be the consolation goal that they allowed, but they will feel happy with the three points and the confidence boost.

The scoring would be opened by Volkan Ayhan as he turned the the visitor's left back inside out and that allowed him a clear run at goal, applying a simple finish to give the Red Wolves an early lead in the 15th minute. Ertan Renda would double the score for the Red Wolves with an excellently struck effort from 25 yards, leaving the goalkeeper completely stunned and unable to react to the shot as it fizzed past him.

Ismail Burhan would then add another goal to his impressive tally, this time he would do so after a good pass from Vatan Ercetin, allowing him time to chip the ball with consummate ease over the goalkeeper. The half would be rounded out by Vatan Ercetin's wicked effort that was too hot to handle for the opposition's keeper. This would ensure the Red wolves went in with an overwhelming and unassailable lead.

The visitors would get their first chance at a shot on target with a weak effort that was scooped up comfortably by Iskender Nur. The lead would extend to five as Omer Tameroglu scored with a towering header after being thrown on to see out the match. A chance would fall to Ertan with his volley careening off the bar and going safely out of bounds.

Omer would round out the scoring for the Red Wolves with a well placed effort that was just out of the reach of the keeper while the visitors would get a consolation in the 87th minute, the striker getting on the end of the cross from the wing and Iskender was left unable to deal with it.

The result leaves the Red Wolves in third place, four points behind Kelssek and preparing for their bout against group leaders Cassadaigua who will be coming off a big win of their own, a 4-0 win over Audiaslania.

What They Said After The Match:

Bekir Altingunes: "It's good to kick off this tough stretch with such a commanding win, it feels like we've really gotten into our stride and I'm feeling optimistic about our chances going forward. Even against the very best team who we will be playing next and that will obviously necessitate a lot of preparation and making sure our players are in the right headspace, but I think we're ready to show this group what we're really capable of and push on."

Player Ratings:

Iskender Nur 6/10 - Aside from the one goal he conceded which will disappoint him, he didn't have very much to do.

Ozbek Sarikaya 7/10 - Managed to look good and even contribute in offensive moves.

Kemal Colak 6/10 - Had a dull day, as he completed his duties without incident.

Berker Balkan 7/10 - Commanded the aerial battled and shut down the opposition perfectly.

Gokdeniz Dag 6/10 - Looked tired before he got taken off, but was solid enough.

Ertan Renda 7/10 - Took his goal well and looked dangerous from a deeper position than he's usually used to.

Reza Karaduman 7/10 - Played well as a screen and linked up well across the pitch.

Caner Turan 6/10 - Struggled to make an impact and needed to be taken off.

Vatan Ercetin 9/10 - Commanded the pitch today and looked like a supreme player in comparison even to his teammates.

Volkan Ayhan 7/10 - Looked energetic and dangerous, including getting an early goal.

Ismail Burhan 7/10 - He played well and got a good goal.

Substitutes:

Omer Tameroglu 8/10 - He came on and grabbed an excellent brace.

Yerkebulan Suyumbayev 7/10 - He came on and looked much more of a livewire than Caner Turan who was having a tough day.

Eyup Mustafa 6/10 - He came on for a slightly hobbled Gokdeniz Dag and filled in admirably.

Person of the Match: Vatan Ercetin - He grabbed three assists playing a part in all of the striker's goals and got himself a good goal right before half time.

Schedule and Results:

Home stadiums will have capacity in brackets

MD1: @ Xuzaqiy W 5-3
MD2: vs Cassadaigua, Dev Halk Stadium (30,000), Demir L 3-2
MD3: @ Kelssek L 2-1
MD4: vs Barunia, Tashkent Belediye Isci Stadium (18,500), Tashkent L 4-1
MD5: @ Audiasania W 3-2
MD6: Bye
MD7: vs Olastor, Belediye Park (5,800), Demir W 3-1
MD8: @ Patistan W 5-3
MD9: vs The Mann Clan, Belediye Park (5,800), Demir W 2-0
MD10: @ Grod Island W 5-3
MD11: vs Sargossa, Hisar Belediye Sendika Stadium (27,500), Demir D 1-1
MD12: @ Res Publica Nova Roma W 7-3
MD13: vs Ziwana, Halkın Güneş Çiftliği Stadium (27,000), Elektriklestirme W 4-2
MD14: vs Xuzaqiy, Demir-Is Stadium (5,500), Demir W 6-1
MD15: @ Cassadaigua
MD16: vs Kelssek, Madenci Stadium (27,000), Uryan
MD17: @Barunia
MD18: vs Audiasania, Maden-Is Stadium (3,400), Uryan
MD19: Bye
MD20: @ Olastor
MD21: vs Patistan, Almat Jimnasyum (3,000), Demir
MD22: @ The Mann Clan
MD23: vs Grod Island, Tasova Belediye Stadium (2,000), Tasova
MD24: @Sargossa
MD25: vs Res Public Nova Roma, Dev Halk Stadium (30,000), Demir
MD26: @ Ziwana

[Chromatika]

Chromatik City Courier
Jordan Lawless, Sports Columnist

Group 3 Matchday 14: Terre Septentrionale 0-4 Chromatika @ Terre Septentrionale
Chromatik Scorers: Andisori, B. ('28), Etienne ('38), Han ('59), Gail ('84)
Starting XI (4-2-3-1): Williams (C); McBee - Friedman - Ibex - Rowles; Kim, M.S. - Avis; Etienne - Gail - Han; Andisori, B.
Substitutes: Dias -> Avis ('49), Nocturne -> Rowles ('61), Marc -> Etienne ('72)

Group 3 Matchday 15: Chromatika 4-1 Sanctanus @ Anomaly Tower, Chromatik City, Chromatika (Cap. 110,320; 42,350 Seats)
Chromatik Scorers: Andisori, K. ('45, '56, '72), Croix-Pierre ('88)
Starting XI (4-2-3-1): Nichols; Ruth - Anderson - Ken - Nocturne; Limones - Zuniga; Kelly - Mora - Croix-Pierre; Andisori, K. (C).
Substitutes: Burns -> Zuniga ('59), Friedman -> Ken ('63), Kuznetsov -> Croix-Pierre ('72)

Two matches, two successful attempts at revenge for the Chromatiks as Chromatika starts to make a push up the standings of Grup 3, hoping that things aren't too late. The first flight of players went 2-1 in their three matches, and the second flight, anchored by Keira Andisori, made short work of Sanctanus; yet another revenge match against Adyatin await them next.

Chromatika will hope to go 3-0 in their next three matches and hope that Eshan and Savojarna drop points in the interim; that is the only way back into these qualifiers after their atrocious start.

At least they have a few feel-good wins under their belts, now... And one cannot say yet that a lower ranked team has managed to sweep Chromatika, with the key word being yet.

[Squornshelan Remnant States]

Why. Can't. We. Beat. Torisakia?
Also some more history
mostly history, actually
let's just pretend that match didn't happen
Salwan Mynhier

Josef Kaizers and Juan Velasquez: The Great Wall of Chalesm

The narrative of Squornshelan football during Kaizers' international career defies quick summation. On the one hand, from Cycle 27, when he was first named to the roster, to Cycle 30, his last, the team never failed to qualify, and reached at least the second round. The Red-and-Black were also absolutely dominant in qualifying during this time, losing just two qualifying matches across four cycles. In light of that dominance, as well as the team's semifinal appearances in Cycles 25 and 27, however, the performances in Cycles 28 and 29 in particular were considered disappointing. Even reaching the quarterfinal in Cycle 30 was not viewed as a particularly satisfying result. How then to describe the teams that played in red and black during this time, and the players that played for them? Were they elite teams that fell victim to bad luck, unfortunate draws, and poorly timed underachievement? Were they good, but ultimately overrated teams, undeserving of their top-ten KPB rank? More to the point for the current article, what does it all mean for Kaizers' career when viewed in retrospect?

Receiving little playing time during Cycle 27, Kaizers was promoted to the first team alongside previously profiled defenders Alan Dymek and Otto Benson for the start of Cycle 28's qualifying tournament. This move drew no small amount of criticism from the public in Squornshelous proper. Though every other outfield position in the first team was occupied by someone from mainland Squornshelous, the back three was now entirely composed of "Westies." His promotion came during something of a golden age for Chalesm. Right back Juan Velasquez, though he would not be promoted to the first team until Cycle 29, was a steady presence on the bench for the Red-and-Black, and teenage forward Peter Nilsson had been named to the roster, though he wouldn't see a great deal of playing time, and would ultimately fail to make any other cup roster. For the time being though, during Cycle 28, Chalesm's star was still very high indeed. With the league so dominated by mainland clubs, Vogsphere in particular, there was a strong influence placed on finishing as the top-placed team from West Squornshelous, and Chalesm looked sure to wrest the title of Best in the West away from the Algolian giants who had been the dominant forces thus far.

In the season immediately preceeding the start of Cycle 28 qualifying, Chalesm posted their highest finish ever, placing second in the league. (Vogsphere won of course, the league was fixed back then, don't @ me) Kaizers had a few issues making the adjustment to the level of international play, and a couple of the goals allowed in the group stage at World Cup 28 were arguably a result of him being caught out of position. The intense criticism he received (again mostly at the hands of Mainlanders) following their second-round elimination by Liventia was definitely unwarranted. The 4th ranked team running into the 2nd ranked team in the second round was just a really unfortunate draw. It just as easily could have been a final matchup (except for those pesky Starblaydi and Bedistani characters). In any case, the criticism seemed limited to a set of willfully uninformed and bigoted fans, as management kept Kaizers in the first team at center back going forward from Cycle 28, and promoted another pair of West Squornshelans to play alongside him. Velasquez on the right was an easy choice, given the chemistry he and Kaizers had from years together at Chalesm. For left back, another veteran, Tito Guyaquil of Traal was promoted. All this was at the behest of new manager Marko Antropov, who had been pried away from Vogsphere to manage the national team. His team would continue the trend of an attack composed of Mainlanders, with defense and goalkeeping from the West; Algolia backstop Timothy Purcell rounded out the defensive lineup.

The team would cruise through qualifying with a perfect record excepting a pair of draws with Dance 2 Revolution. The attack racked up 43 goals through the 14-match schedule, while the Kaizers-led defense conceded just 8. They again opened the group stage with a draw. This time it was a 3-3 shootout against Arridia, the other attack happy team sporting red and black uniforms in those days. The Red-and-Blacks, perhaps reading a little too much of their own press, appeared to have overlooked the 25th-ranked Rouge-et-Noirs, and came within a few minutes of a humiliating defeat. A similarly poor defensive performance almost saw the Black-and-Reds squander a big lead against Chicanada in the second match of the group stage. While Kaizers and co put on their strongest performance against the supposed toughest team in the group, but even holding Total 'n Utter Insanity to a single goal, there were some concerns about the defense's ability, having allowed nearly as many goals as they had through all of qualifying in just three matches. Yes, the attack was still clicking at over three goals per match, but surely not even the Red-and-Black could sustain such a torrid scoring pace forever? With media prognosticators the world over picking them to advance, the 5th ranked Pschychoes had advanced to face 10th-ranked co-hosts Krytenia in the second round. There was real worry though, that their superb qualifying performance had masked flaws in the team that were only now being exposed. Against the Dragons on their home ground, those fears came to pass. The attack dried up, scoring only a single goal, and the Kryties notched a brace to advance, and would eventually finish third, defeating Rejistania on penalties. The Red-and-Black were left scratching their heads.

Chalesm faded a bit in the intervening years, remaining a top-half club, but not realistically challenging for the championship again. They did have one inspired run to hoist the Squornskelch trophy in a tournament where they were nigh impossible to score on. Accordingly, while Guyaquil would end his international career after Cycle 29, Kaizers returned for a final run at the cup, accompanied by his partner Velasquez, both now entering their mid-thirties. They were joined, as was tradition, by another West Squornshelan defender, left back Jan Jorgenson of Algolia (remember the name folks). Unfortunately, the loss to Krytenia was written off as a fluke by the leaders of the Squornshelan FA, and they returned nearly everyone else from the World Cup 29 team. This was an old football team folks. 7 first team players were over the age of 30, with 37 year old Goran Syvatov still starting at center mid. Considered as a whole, the average age of the 25-man roster was only just shy of 29 years. This was either going to be a team that got very lucky avoiding injuries, a team that got big contributions from its bench players, or a team that crashed and burned far earlier than it should based on it's KPB position at 9th in the multiverse.

Once again, qualifying was something of a breeze for the Red-and-Black. The team won their first 8 matches, and 3 draws down the stretch represented the only points left on the table. Two of those, against Vilita and Becquerelia, came after the Squornshelans had already clinched their qualification, and were resting a number of their more aged players. The match with Vilita was also marred by an error by the referee. Grn-Pol, a Kleptoball referee from Az-Cz was somehow put in charge of this important qualifying match despite the fact that his only experiencing officiating football was volunteering at high school matches, and the Az-Cz FA had not submitted his name to the qualifying referee pool. When a Vilitan midfielder made a studs up challenge on Haraldur Sanguine, who was playing in relief of Jeff Harris, he was quite correctly shown a yellow card. Grn-Pol, however, failed to note that he had already been shown one in the first half. In fact, the error was not noticed by anyone at field level, perhaps due to the fact that not even the Vilitan press apparently had access to the names of the players fielded by the Jungle Cats. When the Squornshelan press box contingent was finally able to communicate the situation to the coaches, they were unable to gain the attention of the officials. Enraged, assistant manager Pavel Andreev finally resorted to physically seizing the fourth official's board, shoving the unfortunate Spruitlander away as he tried to reclaim it. Andreev was promptly sent off of course, but in the ensuing confusion, Antropov, shouting at the top of his lungs was finally able to alert the officials to their earlier error. The situation was rectified, but Vilita had enjoyed a ten-minute reprieve before having to go down a player. The Red-and-Black were able to find an equalizer before the match ended, and the error ended up not having a significant effect on the final standings. Qualifying ended with Squornshelous in their customary position atop their group, with an 11-3-0 record. The attack had been as good as ever, but the defense was not so strong as they had previously been, allowing a respectable one goal per game. Respectable does not a World Cup win; they were going to need to be better.

In The Islands of Qutar, Kaizers and Velasquez, for the first time as starters, avoided opening the group stage with a draw. They renewed their acquaintance with Chicanada with a gutty 2-1 victory. The next two matches were flawless from the defense, and they kept clean sheets against their hosts, along with Cataduanes for a perfect nine points from the group stage. Advancing, they would face off with the Vikings of Fmjphoenix (I always wondered, was it F M J Phoenix, or are you supposed to try to pronounce "fmjph" to start the word? Can someone r/askhistorians for me?). The defense was strong overall, but the attack dried up, needing a last minute equalizer from Khabarov to force extra time. After a scoreless half hour, the two teams came out for the penalty shootout. Interesting side note, Jorge the Amazing Talking Monkey was apparently still providing sports commentary in the Imperium. How long do monkeys live anyway? Syvatov, Khabarov, Harris, Petrov and Xenakis all converted for the Red-and-Black, while the Vikings' last shooter, Brian Dougwood, sent his shot out off the crossbar. Unfortunately, teams that live by the penalty shootout can also die by the penalty shootout. Waiting for the Red-and-Black in the quarterfinal was Liventia. Again. After both teams hammered two goals past each other in the first 90 minutes, and neither could muster another in extra time, it was to the spot once again. Five shots for each team also proved not enough, and the Terminators needed sudden death to finally prevail, 6-5. Looking back, this team was fairly fortunate to make it as far as they did, but 240 minutes of football plus a pair of penalty shootouts proved too much to make it through for the veterans on the team, and there would be a rash of retirments following the elimination, including Kaizers and Velasquez. While it must have looked like the end of an era of talented teams that couldn't quite get over the hump, what many fans didn't realize is that the lineup shuffle that ensued cleared the way for a cadre of players who would do what no Squornshelan had done before.

Kaizers and Velasquez (the latter of which was puzzlingly listed in on the first team chart for World Cup 31 qualifying despite having retired years earlier) both played another two years in Chalesm before jointly retiring. Their departure marked the definite end of Chalesm's contending years, as the Blues were never able to find players to replace them, and became a below-average side more likely to sell its stars to bigger clubs than to build around them, as would be the case with wunderkind goalkeeper Ensio Varg in a few years. In the West Squornshelan club landscape, Algolian dominance was returning, highlighted by players like Igor Khabarov and Pyotr Nedvinsky of Damogran, Andrey Kuznetsov and Lanne Niemenen of Jaglan, and Jan Jorgenson of Algolia. Kaizers, sad to say did not adjust well to retirement. Struggling with addiction, he would pass away from an overdose at just 43 years of age. Velasquez, a pallbearer at Kaizers' funeral, blamed himself for failing to reach out more to his friend and teammate, and retreated from public life for the rest of his life, living out a quiet retirement in a small town outside Chalesm.

SRS Qualifying Schedule

MD1:  SRS 4-5 Torisakia @ Pheldagrif Stadium, Yassaca, Sivolvia, SRS (cap. 45,620)
MD2:  Balaslandia 2-3 SRS @ TBA
MD3:  SRS 5-3 Wreckeria @ Sunergy Field, Hunian, Algolia, SRS (cap. 37,550)
MD4:  Busgoa Islands 2-3 SRS @ Dukuma Oval, Dukuma, BUS (cap. 63,000)
MD5:  Bye
MD6:  SRS 5-2 Drawkland @ Megabrantid Financial Field, Brantisvogan, Megabrantis, SRS (cap. 69,245)
MD7:  Jantor 3-3 SRS @ TBA
MD8:  SRS 0-2 Gyatso-kai  @ Slavnarzeczpospolitastadion, Lublova, Molvania, SRS (cap. 61,230)
MD9:  Donnacona 0-1 SRS @ TBA
MD10: SRS 2-3 Kita-Hinode @ Bridger Lane, Damogran, Algolia, SRS (cap. 72,406)
MD11: Kohnhead 0-1 SRS @ Orange Bull Stadium, Kohnhead City, KHN (cap. 23,000)
MD12: SRS 3-1 EGM @ Igbar Steel Arena, Zarss, West Flania, SRS (cap. 15,100)
MD13: Lochario 1-2 SRS @ Zun Olympic Stadium, (cap. 98,000)
MD14: Torisakia 2-0 SRS  @ TBA
MD15: SRS 5-1 Balaslandia @ Killough Grove, Han Wavel, Han Dold, SRS (cap. 31,400)
MD16: Wreckeria v SRS @ Patrick Stadium, Halstead, WRE (cap. 30,000)
MD17: SRS v Busoga Islands @ The Lutenstaad, Lutenblag, Molvania, SRS (cap. 75,000)
MD18: Bye
MD19: Drawkland v SRS @ Spartan Veteran Stadium (107,500)
MD20: SRS v Jantor @ Malgacorp Arena, Hensha, Megabrantis, SRS (cap. 29,350)
MD21: Gyatso-kai v SRS @ Meshgeroya'yaim, Keldabe, Mandalore, GKI (cap. 79,890)
MD22: SRS v Donnacona @ Smolak Systemy Stadion, Sjerezo, Molvania, SRS (cap. 31,200)
MD23: Kita-Hinode v SRS @ Tentai City, Tentai, HIN (cap. 80,000)
MD24: SRS v Kohnhead @ Olympiastad, Arkintoofle, Megabrantis, SRS (cap. 47,550)
MD25: EGM v SRS @ TBA
MD26: SRS v Lochario @ Castle Street, Jaglan, Algolia, SRS (cap. 57,300)

[Zwangzug]

"Hello again, this continues to be Stefan Gimbal, and with me is Katie Cheung, who has admirably continued to take on this job rather than bleeping off to some more interesting vocation."

"You're welcome, Stefan."

"Zwangzug here in the capital to play host to Squornshelous, a team with a long history but now struggling in the shadow of their 'remnant' neighbors."

"What happened in World Cup 14?"

"Well, uh, lots of things, Katie. It appears that...Kingsford defeated Rejistania in the final, which was held in Oglethorpia, Kingsford having been the other host of the tournament."

"This Squornshelan press blurb says that it was a dark day in their nation's history."

"Well, it's a very long history, Katie, I guess I'll look into it and get back to you. In the meantime, the Imperium visitors ready to take the field here..."

"..Sykko in defense having a strong performance so far. Potentially related obliquely to the former side's nickname, but mind you I don't know how to pronounce that."

"Admirable self-awareness, Katie. Mirjami passes forward to Natalia Berglund, Berglund dodging Twoni and Friede in the midfield. Sets up Lucia Krupin--and Krupin makes it 1-0!"

"If only I'd submitted Imperial Records Requisition form 733B-2, maybe we could have gotten a sound byte."

"Considering how frequently we seem to go through announcers here, I don't think we can be blamed for not having known in advance that you'd be on tap for Matchday Fourteen."

"Hmm. Maybe we ought to spam random bureaucracies just to be prepared in time for next cycle..."

"...Well, I have some information about World Cup 14, Katie."

"Oh?"

"Squornshelous were drawn into a talented group that included eventual runners-up Rejistania; Tanah Burung, who had finished second in World Cup 2; Crystilakere, who would triumph in World Cup 19; the well-named Ineptia, who lost eleven of their eighteen matches; and a young nation called Vilita in their second cycle."

"I see."

"They started off strong, defeating Danilotown 6-0, and then beating rivals Rejistania. They would slump later, however, and the Orange-Blues got revenge in the second half, prompting celebration from Rejistanian fans who considered it payback for defeats in World Cup 9. Ultimately, Squornshelous failed to qualify."

"That's it? They're devastated about coming fourth in their qualifying group?"

"Well, bear in mind, they'd qualified on all nine of their previous attempts, and would do so in the next twenty-seven tournaments as well. It was an outlier."

"My gosh, they bounced back to make the final the very next tournament!"

"Those were different times."

"All the same, it can't have been that traumatic--"

"I'll just interrupt you there, Katie, as Banach nicely dispossessing Chaika, over to McCollins, and McCollins ties it up for Zwangzug! One apiece here in Zwischen..."

"...I'm just saying, considering what's happened to their country since, the dictatorships and repression and all, maybe they ought to get a sense of perspective."

"Everyone has a perspective, it just might not be the same as yours. Martikainen now, the halftime sub demonstrating good pace. Forward to Popov, still Popov, and the visitors retake the lead."

"They do realize that by contemporary standards, it's quite difficult to qualify for the World Cup? I mean, what, a hundred and ninety-five teams trying to make it to Farfadillis or Mriin, a lot of talented players will be off to the Cup of Harmony as it stands."

"True. But considering their relative, uh, isolation as facilitated by security technology, I suspect what news they have of the outside world is carefully filtered."

"I'm not sure whether to be more disappointed that they can't hear my incisive commentary or relieved that they're not being exposed to your drivel."

"Uh, well then. Hmm, Sonnabend motioning for a change, think he's seen enough of Stefred for the day."

"Probably a prudent decision, considering the way she reacts to historical discussions it's impressive she hasn't been booked yet. Although if she can hear us from the clubhouse, that might be a problem."

(Goalscorer against Adsuri: Burkhart 68)

[Riennic Isles]

The Riena Sentinel

---

Legalese 2-3 Riena
Wavelets start second half of qualifying with a win despite late scare

---

• Legalese: Osofsky (87', 90+1')
• Riena: Kanzaki (35'), Kagura (44'), Haneda (57')

A brace of late goals from Legalite midfielder Kamari Osofsky threatened to spoil the party, but Riena managed to weather a late surge by Legalese to see out a thrilling win at the National Stadium in Legalese City. Kanzaki and Kagura did the damage for the Wavelets in the first half, and Haneda added further gloss to the scoreline three minutes before the hour mark before Legalese rallied strongly to score two goals in the dying moments of the match.

Unlike the debacle against the same opponents at home, a typically positive Riena set out to attack right from the first whistle as they sought to avenge their loss at home. The Wavelets pushed Legalese deep into their own half, effectively setting up camp deep within enemy territory, as they sought to make an early breakthrough. Meru Matsukai and Kaede Igarashi both missed presentable chances early in the game, the latter coming very close to opening the scoring with a free kick from twenty-five yards that shaved the outside of Lindamood's right post. But the reprieve proved to be short-lived; in the thirty-fifth minute, Aya Nakiri showed excellent vision to produce a defence-splitting through ball that left Rion Kanzaki, in predatory mood, with the simplest of close-range finishes. Minami Kagura added a second goal for Riena just before half-time, blasting a rocket of a free kick past Lindamood to send the Wavelets into the break with a 2-0 advantage.

The second half opened in much the same fashion as the first as Legalese struggled to find a way past the Riena high press, but they were presented with their first clear-cut chance of the game when the recalled Yui Narita slipped on the wet turf while in possession. Skyler Mandella seized on the mishap to sprint clear into a one-on-one with Miho Minato, but the Riena 'keeper showed her nerve, expertly closing down the shooting angle before beating away the Legalite forward's shot. Legalese were made to rue their missed opportunity minutes later. Picking up the loose ball after a Legalite attack broke down, Narita delivered a booming upfield pass that found Cocoa Haneda in acres of space, and the talented winger showed her ruthless streak with a composed finish past Lindamood.

Despite being three goals down, Legalese gradually began to pose a danger to the Riena defence as the visitors sat back in an attempt to protect their lead. The substitute Mitch Oyston served notice of the Legalese threat moments after coming on, blasting a cutback past Minato only for his effort to be ruled out for a marginal offside. But Riena failed to learn their lesson, continuing to sit deep in the belief that a three-goal cushion would suffice to see out the game. Osofsky's late show saw the midfielder score two beautiful goals - the first an instinctive long-range hammer that left a stunned Minato with no chance, the second a superb header from a free kick wide out on the right after Narita had upended Trace Coursey. Legalese might well have had a third, equalising goal had the game gone on for just a few more minutes; as it was, Osofsky's brace proved to be too little, too late for the home team.

With a seventh win of the qualifiers secured despite their late wobble, Riena now have twenty-three points on the board. This win puts Riena within four points of second-placed Qasden, who have a game in hand on the Wavelets having had their bye this matchday. It is clear that imperfections remain within this callow squad, and defensive issues especially remain a serious concern for manager Kanata Shiranami, but Riena will definitely be looking to build on this win as they push for a strong second half of qualifying. The next matchday sees Saintland travel to the Wavelet Arena, and Riena will be hoping to avenge their defeat in the reverse fixture against a Sanctii team currently enduring an indifferent qualifying campaign.

Legalese (4-4-2): Lindamood; Cestero, Everet, Cauthon, Flett; Ree, Osofsky, Kaai, Shill; Mandella, Charlot
Substitutes: Heckaman, Tade, Mcgilvery, Senechal (80'), Oyston (64'), Coursey (75'), Borgella

Riena (4-3-3): Minato; Igarashi, Narita, Amemiya, Kagura; Matsukai, Kirimiya, Nakiri; Haneda, Kanzaki, Steiner
Substitutes: Kugimiya, Uruha (69'), Tsukamoto, Ishibashi (75'), Samukawa, Ayanami (60')

[Flavovespia]

Vale

The First Kit

69BU saw Vale FC form to compete in the Waldster League, and the Gold Cup, before later being a founder of the Inter City Cup. The amber with black shorts and socks would be their kit colours for several decades. The shade of amber is darker than the modern day, largely due to the manufacturing of kits back in the day making brighter colours harder. The purple was only introduced in 32BU, upon joining the GWNFA Super League. This was to provide a unique colour combination as per the GWNFA rules, but also as a tribute to Vale Valiants, who merged with Vale FC decades before. As for this kit, like many of the era, it’s very plain, and represents the kit technology of the time.

Celebrated Classic

The 29BU-26BU won here, and that wasn’t a particularly large surprise. Another one from the first year in the GWNFA Super League teams had more freedom with their kit designs. Vale added to their amber and purple colours with a simple V over the shoulders and down the shirt. A design that’s simple yet iconic. Although an obvious design choice when people think of it, it still is a classic look, that Vale have since recreated several times.

Modern Marvel

Somewhat to the surprise of some, it’s not a V kit remake that won in this category. Instead, the “penguin kits” of 26AU-27AU have won here. A design concept that a few teams have tried over the years, the contrast between amber and purple for Vale means it just works well, the complementary colours standing out without one dominating the over. The V dashes along the sleeves and shorts also work well, adding to an iconic kit. Sadly the team were relegated wearing this, so it may be a while before a revival.

Colour of Success

13BU-12BU is the season chosen. After relegation to the GWNFA Challenge League in 20BU, Vale bounced back immediately under management of Christopher Horne. He would lead them to a halcyon era this decade, including a 2nd place and a 3rd place in the aforementioned years. An amber shirt with a chevron shadow pattern, with 3 of the shadow rows them filled in purple. Probably not one of Vale’s best kits, and a kit that is “of its time” so to say. That said, it doesn’t have the same level of excesses as some of the kits of those years.

Fashion Disaster

A surprise “winner” here, it’s not one of the later classic era kits chosen, but the 7AU kit. Like with Loxthorpe Rovers, it’s not so much the design, but the colour that was all wrong according to the fans. The purple shorts were dropped for an all-amber design, and there was very little of their purple on the kit. Indeed the secondary colour of the kit was a darker amber, with purple relegated to tertiary trim. The design itself used a stock template instead of a bespoke template, as Vale were still a Challenge League side and didn’t have a kit supplier to make them completely unique kits. However, given other teams with the same template had their usual colours, it’s baffling how Vale ended up not having them. Thankfully, with an all-purple away kit, Vale could play in their normal colours, which they switched back to during the season. This kit with purple shorts would be worn in the Challenge League play-off final, where Vale lost to South Maishop in the same template.

[Hampton Island]

(Setting: Stadium CEO and Assistant converse)

CEO: Here we go again, another win. Why can’t these teams beat a bunch of old guys?

Assistant: Ratings are great, though. In fact, a recent analysis out of Stafford City University said that more people watched the most recent World Cup qualifying game then did the last NSSCRA race in Hapilopper.

CEO: That’s skewed though, we have no one in the Chase. But I get your point. Those ratings are good for the program.

Assistant: I know you want to fire Hannah Sanders, but that can at least wait until after they choke on the lead they have right now for the second spot and make their way to the Cup of Harmony.

CEO: Even then, the fact that they have made it this far, I would have to let Hannah manage in the Cup of Harmony, or else my integrity is shot. And what happens if they make the World Cup? Then that broad gets a bigger head and thinks she is some kind of managerial genius.

Assistant: She will, but no one can get the money from that in the way that you can.

CEO: I know but it isn’t even about the money now. I am sick of these young pretty faces who shouldn’t be good for anything else then posing in front of a camera making me look bad. First Lexi Patterson, and now Hannah Sanders.

Assistant: Right now she is not making you look bad. The general public does not know the backstory of everything that is going on between the two of you, and they will not know unless she shows that footage to your wife. You are playing this smart right now, step back, let her succeed, and reap in the cash from it. This is still your team.

CEO: It doesn’t feel like it. I know you have never heard me say it is not about the money, but right now, the money and the ratings are not exciting me.

Assistant: She can’t move the team’s home games to Marquette, and she knows that, so as long as that is the case, then everything is going to be fine here as long as your wife never finds out. Have you put any new thought into telling her?

CEO: You know I can’t. That has not changed.

Assistant: I see Ambiguous Insurance Group is coming on now as a sponsor for the team, too. That should be more money in your pocket.

CEO: I haven’t seen it yet. I do have a conference call with them scheduled in a few days. One of the players has a connection with them, and went through Hannah to arrange it.

Assistant: So, I mean, Hannah is doing good things for you.

CEO: I will believe it when I see it. I don’t trust this conference call. We all know Ambiguous is not a company to be trusted.

Assistant: That’s only when you are a policyholder and have to make a claim. Otherwise, they are not bad. And this is about advertising for them, so I am sure they will be ok.

CEO: I still don’t trust any kind of agreement with them.

[Valladares]

The rioting by the Anglophone and Hispanophone communities in the former Valladar capital Columbus as well as in other towns in the former eastern half of the Mountbatten state that became the new state of Angostura with the passing of the Law of Secession had been underway for several days already, with police and military forces having mixed results at containing the unrest. While in the towns around Greater Metropolis there had been daily demonstrations but disturbances had been easier to contain, the situation around Columbus was far more difficult, and the city was divided for all intents and purposes with the Anglophones turning western Columbus into their stronghold and their Hispanic counterparts doing the same east of the Aguablanca river.

Kings of Valladares Marcus and Cyrus watched the events from the royal residence in Metropolis with great concern. According to the provisions of the Law of Secession, they were due to appoint a Royal Delegate to start with the process of formation of state institutions, but decided to wait for more developments in Columbus before making a decision. They already had a candidate, though: former mayor of Aguablanca Arcesio Corcuera, who despite being a nobleman and close enough to the Royal Family, already had significant experience in the public sector. However, the kings feared that relatively high social status could further alienate citizens in the new state and cause more protest, therefore his appointment was delayed.

There was another major cause of concern for Kings Marcus and Cyrus as well: the pacifist-turned-into-inflammatory speech by Prime Minister Jefferson Pratt from the balcony of Columbus' Palacio Quemado the day after the riots started. While both sovereigns thought that it might not have been Pratt's real intention, they agreed on the speech having the exact opposite effect from the one actually intended. And to make matters worse, violent demonstrations had also started to appear further west in the state in the state capital Carloburgo and surrounding zones, demanding for the Prime Minister to resign. The Kings were sitting at their respective desks at Green Palace's Royal Office, discussing what to do on the matter.

"I'm not liking any words in that speech at all, Marcus. Pratt definitely goofed there."

"'Goofed' is such an understatement...I think there are far more subtle ways to reprimand someone than straight singling them out as 'uncivilized bigots'. I agree that was not the best course of action and it will leave the Royal Government in a poor standing with the Mountbatten citizens."

"Heck, they even were chanting against us on the first day of rioting!"

"The situation at Columbus and Mountbatten is spiraling out of control and needs a shock measure before it spreads across the country. Three days ago it was just in Columbus, today we're having people protesting everywhere in Mountbatten. And the difference now, is that those ones are asking for the Prime Minister to resign or be dismissed. The last thing we need now is a revolution."

"The Valladar Monarchy has not sacked a Prime Minister since when...? 1938?"

"Aye, the infamous Ruggiani case. King Charles II kicked him out for exposing his true colours as a felon: tax evasion and forgery of signatures. Clearly not fit or worthy to be a Head of Government."

"The speech was a big mistake on Pratt's part, as he has foolishly turned the tide against himself and lost the confidence of the people. And the best thing we can do to avoid a widespread fire is dismissing him. He's a nice guy, but I don't think he will get out of this unscathed."

"I must concur with that..."

In that moment, King Marcus' aide entered the room in a rush, carrying in her hands an envelope with a CD and a letter. The envelope, from the office of Liberal leader and MP Arthur Kremer, had a "URGENT" label sticked on it.

"Majesties! I beg your pardon but this is extremely important! It's from the office of Mr. Kremer!"

"Hmm...now what does he want? Outlaw Catholicism? Condemn the Mega Bomba?"

"Or perhaps overthrow the monarchy?" Both sovereigns chuckled. "Fine, Nicole. Thank you, you may now leave. We'll see what it is about."

The aide bowed and left both kings alone in the office. They opened the envelope to reveal its content: the CD and a short letter hand-written and signed by Kremer himself. The letter read as follows:

Your Highnesses, I extend to You a very cordial and humble greeting,

As you might be already aware, there have been some recent developments that have prostrated one of Your federal subjects to its knees and have filled the hearts of its hard-working and loyal citizens with anxiety, angst, and suffering. Those developments can be traced to the passing of a recent law that has been done under illegal conditions at the most recent session of the Royal Parliament. If You wish to know which 'illegal conditions' I'm talking about, You should open the CD attached to this letter. It is important that this wrong is undone as soon as possible, before it totally engulfs the nation on fire. I hereby place my trust in Your just and timely action, and I hope, like all of my fellow citizens, that this current situation finds a way out able to relieve us all.

Thanks for Your attention.

Your humble servant,
The Honourable MP Arthur Kremer

The kings did as suggested by Kremer, and opened the CD on the computer placed on Marcus' desk. It contained a single file, which turned out to be a recording of the most recent meeting of the Conservative bloc, led by Speaker of the Royal Senate Stéphane Bertrand, and held on the night prior to the voting of the Law of Secession. There, Bertrand was announcing to his fellow party partners his intention to artificially reduce the quorum of the Royal Parliament by not counting any of the Liberal and Labour MPs, which would be announced to the rest of the legislative body prior to the start of the session, and obviously, the hidden motivations behind the idea. After listening to the recording, the kings reacted with utter displeasure at the revelation of the Conservatives' ultimately successful attempt to rig the voting session to their own interests.

"He did...WHAT!? That's plain illegal!"

"And speaking of poor moves...this one is even worse."

"It doesn't look like one head will roll at the end of the day, but two...and even several others more."

And so, Kings Marcus and Cyrus ordered every TV and radio stations in the country to temporarily shut down their usual broadcasts at 8:30 pm that day for a special Royal Broadcast, the very first one they would make during their reign.

[Ancherion]

Early in the morning it was announced that the longstanding manager, Agostinho De Mequites has been vacated from his position as manager of the Ancherion national team and has been temporarily been replaced by the assistant manager, Bendegúz Gamberlini. After a string of poor performances from our last win at Jamestown, which has been the worst run of going without a win since the period of World Cup 82 to World Cup 83 qualifying including the Campionato Esportiva 24, the team has now no hope of qualifying for the world cup and is now in need of a real big miracle to do so but even that won't be enough. The previous period was towards the end of Alberto Di Mouri's career as manager before he was replaced by De Mequites when the Boring Paradise football association combined with Ancherion for the national and domestic competitions.

We will see how De Mequites has done throughout his managerial career. He first started as an assistant manager under, Grzegorz Wasiliewski for the Boring Paradise national team before taking the helm himself towards the end of World Cup 77 qualifying. De Mequites was in charge for the few remaining matches of the qualifying campaign in which they failed to qualify, however were invited to the 69th Edition of the Cup of Harmony. For his first full campaign as manager, it was a good start for him, Boring Paradise gracefully proceeded from the group stage with a 2-1-1 record and then got into the Round of 16 where they went against West Saintland. After showing poise they easily beat them and went on to lose in a penalty shootout against Qasden.

The next tournament was Campionato Esportiva 19 which was hosted and held within Boring Paradise, the current run of form from the new manager kept going and went 2-1-1 in the group stage on his own turf. But loses from Red Blackiland and Port Christopher ended their campaign in which they were favourites to progress further. He didn't really have any other outstanding achievements after that, he never qualified for the World Cup with a strong Paradisian Team and also never progressed beyond the group stage in Campianato Esportiva or invited to the Cup of Harmony. Just shows how much we should have expected from De Mequites and hopefully this is a change for the future of Ancherion and Boring Paradise. Overall, he had managed 56 games as Boring Paradise manager with a record of 21 wins, 13 draws and 22 loses.

[Kandorith]

Shinonome Kyoai - International
News From The Empire

---

Kandorith Picks Themselves Up Again

*  Group 11                              Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Equestria                              14   11   3   0    44   20  +24    36
 2 HUElavia                               14   11   0   3    41   26  +15    33
 3 Xanneria                               14    9   4   1    37   22  +15    31
 4 Kandorith                              14    8   3   3    35   24  +11    27
 5 Vdara                                  14    6   2   6    27   28   −1    20
 6 Fujai                                  14    4   5   5    22   29   −7    17
 7 Nooooooooooooooo                       14    4   4   6    25   27   −2    16
 8 Jamestownnnn                           14    4   2   8    25   35  −10    14
 9 Ancherion                              14    2   6   6    24   29   −5    12
10 Lo Santano                             14    2   6   6    22   30   −8    12
11 South Concepthuania                    14    3   2   9    21   33  −12    11
12 Blouman Empire                         13    2   4   7    21   29   −8    10
13 Monglechabagd                          13    2   3   8    22   34  −12     9

Tenkyo, as the Kandorese team faced Lo Santano again, the atmosphere in the stadium was quite uncertain and uneasy. The previous match for Kandorith had quite a negative twist when it came to the confidence for the fans and the manager. However, Kandorith managed to turn back around the negativity with a one goal win against Lo Santano. A Most welcome victory of two to one goal to put them back in a solid fourth place. The Kandorese team is still chasing the second and third spot firmly, meaning they basically have to win every match and draw against the numbers one to three. Not an easy task for the Lotus Warriors, but do-able according to Hayabusa.

"I think our best days are approaching during the second stage of the qualification campaign." Hayabusa exclaimed cheerfully. "We have had some worse days, but in general we are performing excellently. I think we can manage to pull our weight all the way. Of course we need to stay cautious and keep performing somewhat better than we already did. I believe the team is up for the challenge. There is absolutely no place for complacency in the team right now. We need to stay cautious however. We can not allow to have any slower days. From now on we have to perform on top of our level and show the world we belong in the largest football tournament there is."

[The Authoritarian Republic of Lochario]

3 WINS AND A LOSS FOR A STARTER COURSE!

After a successful 2 win streak, the Ginger Tigers are feeling hyped to continue it forward. The coach, however, did not take this streak well :”Just look at Payud : He was useless against Drawkland and was no better against Jantor, a team, which we were supposed to crush easily!
I mean, how on earth did that fluke not score an open goal!? It was supposed to go in, but for some reason it didn't! How the fuck would you explain that? !”

One of the most important things Michael noted was struggling with open chances and the defence struggling to tackle the players outside the penalty box. He says, that only the players can get rid of these issues.

[Pasarga]

Last night on Radio Pasarga the cast was taking calls from all across Rushmore. The topic of conversation was how the rest of the region viewed the dual islands, as its been nearly a full century since Pasarga fully embraced its spot as a member of the international community. There was questions as to how much the island nation had changed over the last century and how the rest of the region saw Pasarga and its people.

One caller from Darmen had this to say. "I see a lot of Darmen culture in Pasarga as well. Seem aquiet, reserved people who are charitable and seem to focus a lot on their family and friends. The government seems level headed, has not started any conflicts and seems to treat its people well. The religion of the place seems a bit strange though, not really bad just different than what one would be used to."

That line of thinking seemed to be a common one as a caller from Eastfield Lodge had this to say. "Pasarga seems like an overall positive place to be. The people seem humble and hard working, if perhaps a bit old fashioned. Quiet to, seem to deflect attention away from themselves so they are hard to get to know. But yeah, seems like a good place with good people from what I can tell."

If there was any real concerns about the nation, it seemed to come from the limited democracy on the nation and use of a monarchy still. These are issues that the other governments of the region brought up as well when Pasarga applied to be part of the Rushmori Union. Then as it is now, those concerns seem muted with a slight opening up o of the democratic process and a history of monarchs who work for the good of the nation and people rather than themselves. As we near this century of international cooperation, we hope that things continue as they are, with Pasarga and its people enjoying a relatively good standing among its regional neighbors.

[Trolleborg]

Previous parts of the story: 1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13



“Yes, and there arise a real serious question: what to do with a lot of people who grow up in this life without troubles and problems, who stopped appreciating what they have got and lose it all at the very first serious test? And we took the path of constantly stimulating the best, in our opinion, qualities. You may argue that the constant readiness to fight threats for a better life for yourself and the whole society is not the best qualities, but this approach justifies itself for our conditions. We like to live this way - to value all our conveniences every day, to help our neighbor, to feel keenly connected with the past and the fact that you have to justify the dreams of those who were before you, and live a full, fulfilling life for your own and their satisfaction”


“This approach ... has its drawbacks,” Wesley replied, hesitating.

“It has,” - agreed Keith. “Therefore, we are constantly looking for new ways to show how dare, merciful, compassionate we are, and so that everyone can feel like doing a great job of making the whole world better. That’s why it was with such enthusiasm that the “Opening to the world” that our leadership proposed last year, – and thanks to which you got here, - was received. ”

"Sport? Travel to distant lands? Organization of international transport? So that society has something to overcome? Are you serious?" - asked Wesley, not hiding skepticism.

“I do not insist that our approach is the only one right at all,” said Keith. “But I must say that the opportunity to maintain the honor of the country at the international level is very much appreciated by our society and contacts with foreign countries have already undoubtedly benefited us. Yes, disappointment awaits our country. Actually, we are already have a lot of it. But every defeat and every stupid draw is an occasion to work on yourself and try to become better. Challenge yourself and try to demonstrate your capabilities, this is it. And we are nobody in this vast world - well, in any case, we WERE s nobody yesterday, I think, but now many people in the Multiverse recognize us by sight, if not for sporting successes, then for the noise and witty ideas. And we have to march a really long way, in something no less than many of our heroes go on the way to success. Do you think Jivoglot – as it was hero best known to you, I take his life as example - have easier time, in starting his fight against injustice with just two peasant friends, armed with one shovel on all of them, against the whole ironclad army of Gastinas? And now think about what each fan of our sports teams is experiencing, being brought up on these heroic examples, felt them on their own skin in our interactive programs, having the opportunity to contribute a little bit to making the country even better? And now, if you have no questions, let's enjoy this monument again and discuss what you will do right now. And I would ask you to take five steps back. Great photos come out from there, and I will need a place next to the monument now. ”

From the center of the city two middle-aged tourist walking, angrily choking on their way. Lady was really out of herself, her lips were trembling, as if she was about to sob, and the man, with angry deeply-red face looked like he is ready to beat everyone on the way. A familiar swarm of fireflies glided through the air near them. Tourists stopped in front of the monument, seen it, almost opening their mouths from surprise, and then began to go around, examining the figures.

Naomi poked Wesley with an elbow under her ribs and asked:
“Did you and I looked like that too?”

[Eraman]

CHAPTER 9
ANARA

Fresh from an unexpected victory over the 5-time World Cup champion, Valanora, Eraman travelled to Bliuji for their 9th match. Eraman went into the match brimming with confidence fresh from the huge victory.

The match didn't go well though for Eraman. Bliuji scored very early in the game and sat deep to frustrate the away side. Eraman only managed to score very late in the match through Era Hitam to avoid defeat and steal a point.

Eraman then travelled back home to entertain 3rd seed, Juvencus. The match was held in the capital city, Anara for the first time since the annexation of Mitra and Soma.

Anara is a hostile place to play football for the away side. And it is more hostile towards Tun Sengalang Petara himself. Being the owner of Royal Daulapura, Anara's bitter rival, Tun Sengalang Petara is the most hated man in the city.

Anara is also the epicentre of the ongoing protest. It is a stronghold for the opposition party. The National Front led by Tun Sengalang Petara has no chance to win any seat in the city. The hatred towards royalty and the monarchy institution is very visible among the populace. Why Eraman Football Association decided to play the match in Anara is beyond anyone.

The supposedly home supporter raised a giant tifo before the match. The tifo displayed a man with a dog head wearing a suit with Eraman Football Association logo on his chest. It was definitely aimed towards Tun Sengalang Petara.

The match itself ended in a goalless draw.

Tun Sengalang Petara and The National Front then used the match to antagonize the opposition in Anara. Roadshows were organized throughout the country only for the politicians from The National Front to talk about how rude and uncultured the opponents are.

[South Newlandia]

ELEPHANT VALLEY MAIL
Sports -> Soccer
All black and white results as Elephants drop into 5th

In another back-to-back matchday, the Elephants faced Tamgu and played against Pasarga. Ultimately, the results from the first leg repeated, and South Newlandia beat Tamgu but lost against Pasarga. With these three points, South Newlandia remains solidly up in the standings, but are now four points down from the qualifying spots.

Tamgu 0-3 South Newlandia

The Tamguna squad never stood any chance. We don’t know what was wrong with them, but they could barely get two passes right in a row. South Newlandia controlled the game easily, even though they didn’t have their exactly best day either. With the win, South Newlandia has taken off 6 points from the pot 5 team, which is a fantastic result.

South Newlandia scored the first goal as early as the 11th minute. After a pass from Donald Lancaster, Brandon Irving scored easily against Tamguna goalkeeper Sami Felter.

The Hawks remained ineffective throughout the game. The only solid chance they had was in the 31st minute, when Sayken Ilko’s free kick went almost a metre wide from Mikhail Trischuk’s goal.

The Elephants got the second goal just before half-time, when Tamguna defender Eren Postas fouled Bjorn Cohen inside the penalty box. Brandon Irving took the penalty, and he scored it easily in the upper right corner.

At half-time, South Newlandia seemed like they would be cruising to victory without problems. In order to save energy for the upcoming game against 2nd seed Pasarga, Bjorn Cohen and Raphael Moreno were subbed out at half-time. Ricardo Rayner and Barnaby Hastings took their spots.

South Newlandia wrapped the game up in the 47th minute. Finnley Wallis scored after a nice pass from Jack Schroeder to seal the deal.

Apart from Robert Wolverine exchanging Patrick McMora for Jarod Stuart in the 71st minute, nothing else happened. The Elephants preferred to keep the ball for themselves, and the Tamguna side had basically given up already.

Player Rankings

Mikhail Trischuk (GK, Captain) 7
Well, he didn’t have much to do.

Marcos Pit (LB) 8

Jack Schroeder (LCB) 9
It was a nice game for him, he even got an assist.

Tommy Anderson (RCB) 7

Raphael Moreno (RB) 8

Faisal Harworth (DM) 6
That wasn’t really his best effort, as he got no offensive power in at all.

Donald Lancaster (LM) 8

Patrick McMora (RM) 7

Finnley Wallis (OM) 8

Brandon Irving (ST) 9
He finally got his good game.

Bjorn Cohen (ST) 7

Ricardo Rayner (ST) 6

Barnaby Hastings (RB) 7

Jarod Stuart (RM) 7


Next up was the game against Pasarga. The Elephants had lost the game away, and they were determent to put up a better performance in front of their own fans. The Elephant Dome was packed, and the fans were hopeful after the clear victory over Tamgu. But what was enough against Tamgu was nowhere near enough against Pasarga.

South Newlandia 2-5 Pasarga

Pasarga outmatched the Elephants easily. The Wanderers, after three matches without a win, seem to be back on track to qualify for the World Cup.

The Wanderers secured the game early, scoring in the 3rd and 8th minute already. Alexander Jager and Júlia Müller scored a goal each to give Pasarga a two goal lead.

The Elephants never had good chances to break through in the beginning. In the 29th minute, it was Jan Gersten who scored another goal, this time after a free kick.

The game was basically over at this point, but right before half-time, South Newlandia caught a glimpse of hope. Finnley Wallis scored with a shot from quite a distance, right after stealing the ball from Pasarga’s defense.

At half-time, South Newlandia had ever so slight hopes for a comeback. Coach Robert Wolverine brought Abdurahman Bishop into the game for Faisal Harworth.

There was no comeback, and the Wanderers wrapped the game up fast. They scored in the 46th and 53rd minute, with Jan Gersten and Alexander Jager getting another goal each. After that, the game slowed down quickly. Neither team was willing to put much more effort into a decided game.

Wolverine had one more surprise up his sleeve. In the 84th minute, he brought Simon McCabe into the match for Bjorn Cohen. Only a few minutes later, Simon McCabe managed to score an honorary goal. After a nice pass from Patrick McMora, he surprised Galambos with a shot to make the final score 2-5.

At this rate, the Elephants will not qualify for the world cup. Pasarga proved to be the better team, and they are now high favourites to make it to the finals. Meanwhile, with Simon McCabe seemingly recovering and Manuel O’Neill able to return, the South Newlandian side seems strengthened again.

Player Rankings

Mikhail Trischuk (GK, Captain) 4
Yeah, this one is obvious.

Marcos Pit (LB) 5

Jack Schroeder (LCB) 6

Tommy Anderson (RCB) 5

Raphael Moreno (RB) 4
The entire defense had a horrible day.

Faisal Harworth (DM) 4

Donald Lancaster (LM) 5

Patrick McMora (RM) 7

Finnley Wallis (OM) 7
Wallis and McMora were the only players in acceptable form.

Brandon Irving (ST) 5

Bjorn Cohen (ST) 5

Abdurahman Bishop (OM) 5

Simon McCabe (ST) –

Starters against Eraman

We see quite a few changes compared to the last squad. Manuel O’Neill is back after his red card, replacing Tommy Anderson. Dhruv Roy also returns as Left Back instead of Marcos Pit. Surprisingly, Jack Schroeder got to keep his start.
Kevin Mohamed will start as Defensive Midfield, and Simon McCabe is back as striker. The two push Faisal Harworth and Brandon Irving out of the starting rotation, with Bjorn Cohen surprisingly in the eleven instead of the obvious choice, Brandon Irving.


Results from Matchday 14, Group 13

Valanora (15) 2-1 Juvencus (39)
The Marauders claim their expected three points.

Plane of Possibility (148) 2-0 The Kytler Peninsulae (UR)
The Planers collect three points as well.

Ottoman Syldavia (338) 0-1 Kuriko (330)
Kuriko managed to win here.

Eraman (63) 3-1 Pangurstan (311)
Eraman also claimed three expected points.

Pasarga (25) 3-3 Mavinet (218)
The BoF-Champions held Pasarga to a draw.

Tamgu (79) 0-3 South Newlandia (228)

Bliuji had a second bye day.

Results from Matchday 15, Group 13

Mavinet (218) 1-0 Eraman (63)
Mavinet even got an upset again against the 4th seed, stopping them from climbing into second.

Pangurstan (311) 1-1 Ottoman Syldavia (338)
A draw helps neither side.

Kuriko (330) 0-2 Plane of Possibility (148)
The Planers collected six points and jumped into 4th, ahead of the Elephants.

The Kytler Peninsulae (UR) 1-7 Valanora (15)
Ouch.

Juvencus (39) 2-0 Bliuji (99)
Juvencus sent Bliuji into last place.


South Newlandia (228) 2-5 Pasarga (35)

Tamgu had another bye day.

Current standings

Group 13                              Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Valanora                               14   10   2   2    34   12  +22    32
 2 Pasarga                                14    8   3   3    39   23  +16    27
 3 Eraman                                 14    7   4   3    22   15   +7    25
 4 Plane of Possibility                   14    7   3   4    25   21   +4    24
 5 South Newlandia                        14    6   5   3    25   24   +1    23
 6 Mavinet                                14    6   3   5    36   31   +5    21
 7 Tamgu                                  13    5   2   6    24   26   −2    17
 8 Pangurstan                             14    4   4   6    28   30   −2    16
 9 Juvencus                               14    4   3   7    29   31   −2    15
10 Ottoman Syldavia                       14    4   3   7    13   17   −4    15
11 Kuriko                                 14    4   1   9    18   33  −15    13
12 The Kytler Peninsulae                  14    3   3   8    18   41  −23    12
13 Bliuji                                 13    3   2   8    27   34   −7    11

Schedule for Group 13, Matchday 16

Bliuji (99) vs. The Kytler Peninsulae (UR)
This is the match between 12th and 13th.

Valanora (15) vs. Kuriko (330)
Valanora should get three more points.

Plane of Possibility (148) vs. Pangurstan (311)
The Planers actually have another easy game ahead.

Ottoman Syldavia (338) vs. Mavinet (218)
Mavinet should also claim three points.

Pasarga (25) vs. Tamgu (79)
Pasarga will be the favourite here as Tamgu is not performing at all.

Eraman (63) vs. South Newlandia (228)
South Newlandia will visit the 4th seed next. Eraman is currently in 3rd, and they could really use the win to keep their qualifying chances alive. The match will be held at the Universiti Cittapura Stadium. This is the second match held there, as Eraman defeated Ottoman Syldavia 1-0 on the seventh matchday here. Eraman will be the clear favourite here, and the Elephants will have to work some magic to get points here. In South Newlandia, the match ended in a draw, and Eraman will be looking for more now.

Juvencus has their second bye day.