I dare you to be an atheist after this

[Sociobiology]

My schlong exists, therefore heaven.

Two minutes in heaven are better than one minute in heaven.

but eternity anywhere is torture.

[No Water No Moon]

My schlong exists, therefore heaven.

Two minutes in heaven are better than one minute in heaven.

Flight of the Conchords. Nice.

[The Huskar Social Union]

I'll wager a couple more pages and the thread'll get locked.

How does a thread get locked without devine intervention, you cant explain that.

[Retro Lyra]

My schlong exists, therefore heaven.

Two minutes in heaven are better than one minute in heaven.

Or you can be a man and take 7 minutes.

[Typhlochactas]

Plus, posters like this think they'll convince atheists on NS of all places, you can't explain that, therefore God.

More evidence of god.

''And the Lord said unto John, come forth and receive eternal life.'' But John came fifth and won a toaster.

[Risottia]

...The first accounts of Alexander the Great were written over 100 years after Alexanders death

HAHAHAHAHAHA! FAAAAAIIIIILLLL!!!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Demosthenes

[Dyakovo]

Bad title. Every atheist in the world will say "he lied" and it's pretty inviting for anti-religious comments.

He did lie, he even admits that it is a lie.

Storm concedes there is no medical evidence that he ever died. His alleged NDE occurred while he was unconscious in a hospital bed awaiting surgery.

[Mavorpen]

I'll wager a couple more pages and the thread'll get locked.

How does a thread get locked without devine intervention, you cant explain that.

Bullshit. The mods are divine.

[Retro Lyra]

How does a thread get locked without devine intervention, you cant explain that.

Bullshit. The mods are divine.

The mods are god.

[The Huskar Social Union]

More evidence of god.

''And the Lord said unto John, come forth and receive eternal life.'' But John came fifth and won a toaster.

hahaha genious, mind if i sig this?

[Cannot think of a name]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8vj0qKthCgg

This is the true story of an atheist man who actually went to Hell and came back a Reverend...sounds like a movie, but the guy's actual name is Howard Storm (funny name) and he even wrote a book documenting his hellacious journey into, uh, Hell. My question is this: can you really watch this video and not feel a little uncomfortable with your atheism? I mean, this guy was an atheist - and he SAW Hell. I've heard people say that people see what they want in near death experiences - why would an atheist WANT to see Hell?

So, does seeing the video change your perspective at all? Do you believe it?

So...that's a fun story. Here's another fun story about a budding young soon to be atheist in a Christian elementary school. We'll call him...um...uh...dammit...Name Challenged.

So, little Name Challenged is sitting in his little private Christian academy where there are sect specific stuff that seem kind of weird to him, like they don't celebrate Christmas as the birthday of Jesus because they can pin down the actual date.

"So, like, if I was an orphan and you weren't sure when I was born, you wouldn't just pick a day to celebrate my birthday? Does getting the exact day really matter that much? Like, we're gonna be good and devout people our whole lives and get to the pearly gates and he's gonna be all, 'Well, you were good people, but December 25th? Fuckin' way off. That's the solstice, 'tard. To hell with you.' That doesn't make sense."

Clearly, our little Name Challenged was having trouble with the minutia of belief.

But every other morning they'd all gather in this dinky main church chamber and this young eager chap would tell us stories that related to him about how faith and god helped him through shit and brought him closer to Jesus, so...being the young impressionable cat that Name Challenged was he would sit and hear him out.

"Man, this guy certainly has lived his life, what with all of these harrowing tests of faith and shit. Maybe I am just caught up in the minutia of shit."

But, our little Name Challenged, he still had that pesky habit of asking questions. Turns out, if you have follow up questions, you're a bit of a 'trouble maker', which got our little Name Challenged a seat in the front row next to the energetic and clearly worldly preacher.

The problem is, if you leave Name Challenged alone long enough without anything to do, he'll pretty much just pick up the nearest thing and read it.

Which he did.

He finds this little book next to him with a book mark, so that seems like a good place to start. And what a tale it was, the kind of moral dilemma and question of faith that our young pastor, who seemed so traveled and worldly, would tell. Turns out, he liked that book to, because when he sat down before going up to give his sermon, he too read the book at the book mark where the story with the moral dilemma and question of faith arose.

"Well, he must be a kindred spirit, because the author of this book with his neat little picture, that is not the young pastor."

But wouldn't you know it, when the pastor got up he started telling a story. The same story that was in that little book. Except he was telling that story as if it happened to him.

Now, little Name Challenged was faced with a dilemma of his own...either the exact same, word for word thing happened to both the author of this book and our young preacher...or, our young preacher was full of fucking shit and making up stories so that we'd believe his giant pile of nonsense about burning bushes and floods and getting a crowd drunk off water and zombie saviors and all the rest of it.

And so our little Name Challenged grew up. And while he didn't get any better at thinking of names, he certainly remained pretty fucking skeptical of people telling unverifiable stories that affirm faith and divinity.

And he gained a sort of giddy sense of self awareness and irony by conveying that idea through a anecdotal story.

So there.

Sorry, I got the long winded on. Didn't want to interrupt anyone's flow scrolling past this nonsense.

[Mavorpen]

...The first accounts of Alexander the Great were written over 100 years after Alexanders death

HAHAHAHAHAHA! FAAAAAIIIIILLLL!!!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Demosthenes

Oh my gods, don't get into a historical argument. Arch will come.

[The Blaatschapen]

My schlong exists, therefore heaven.

That's what she said.

[Hallistar]

See evidence like this wont work because most atheists rule out God from the get go so any evidence you present they just say bullshit and walk off. They have a hard time looking at the other side. I can understand why some dont believe in God but to me I see the evidence all around me

Which god? (And yes the following was copied from http://www.thethinkingatheist.com/page/faq):

Yahweh? Allah? Thor? Jesus/Holy trinity? Wotan? Zeus? Isis? Osiris? Loki? Odin? Mithra? Lolth? Aphrodite? Poseidon? Cronos? Horus? Beddru? Krishna? Zarathustra? Baal? Dagon? Dionysus? Enki? Gaia? Helios? Hermes? Marduk? Quetzalcoatl? Ra? Seti? Vishnu? Shiva? Xenu? Akuma? Raiden? Gekka? Bumba? Eshu? Jupiter? Romulus? Ilia? Venus? Abaangui? Ewah? Imhotep? Periboriwa? Dagda? Ishtar? Baldur? Tyr? Quetzalcoatl? Ixchel? Qi-Lin? Dievas? Adonis? Xanthus? Kali? Akka? Anubis? Sif? Mercury? Juno? Brahma? Frith? Or one of tens of thousands of others?

[The House of Petain]

My schlong exists, therefore heaven.

That's what she said.

Giggity.

[Retro Lyra]

More evidence of god.

''And the Lord said unto John, come forth and receive eternal life.'' But John came fifth and won a toaster.

^This man deserves a metal.

[Risottia]

The plus, <insert gibberish>, therefore God aren't helping either.

How so?

Also, bonobos. Therefore God.

...OMG GOD IS A FAG ENABLER!!!

[Monlyth]

I'll wager a couple more pages and the thread'll get locked.

How does a thread get locked without devine intervention, you cant explain that.

Moderators are divine!! For they be the deities of NationStates!

[Typhlochactas]

''And the Lord said unto John, come forth and receive eternal life.'' But John came fifth and won a toaster.

hahaha genious, mind if i sig this?

I don't mind at all.

[Laerod]

Two minutes in heaven are better than one minute in heaven.

Flight of the Conchords. Nice.

Oh, yeah.

Two minutes in heaven are better than one minute in heaven.

Or you can be a man and take 7 minutes.

Maaaaaan.

[Esternial]

My schlong exists, therefore heaven.

That's what she said.

Umm...

[The Huskar Social Union]

hahaha genious, mind if i sig this?

I don't mind at all.

what how exactly do you sig it? just copy and paste or?

[Napkiraly]

Yeah, still an atheist after watching this. It's more than likely this guy is just making up crap, or his REM sleep on cells were activated upon almost dying.

I've also always wondered why being an atheist means you are automatically destined for hell. I mean, I can understand murderers and such, but atheists? Even if they did almost nothing wrong, and tried to do a lot of good in the world, they get condemned to hell for eternity because "Fuck you, you didn't believe in me"?

[Wikkiwallana]

I used to be an atheist.

But then I had a near-death experience once. Ran into God. He told me that the meaning of life is porn, and that our minds are fine-tuned to come up with new, freaky sexual ideas for those in heaven to enjoy.

The only people who go to hell, are those who espouse a Victorian attitude.

I dare you to be an atheist now.

Would have been funnier if you had just left the areas blank.

[Retro Lyra]

Flight of the Conchords. Nice.

Oh, yeah.

Or you can be a man and take 7 minutes.

Maaaaaan.

There you go.