The World Assembly Strangers' Bar

[Soviet Canuckistan]

Simone replied, while looking into a small push with a couple of purple tablets, "Some cyanide pills are looking good right now, and they're grape-flavoured." She downed a shot glass of Everclear and told Anton to type up a counter-campaign.

[Quadrimmina]

Simone replied, while looking into a small push with a couple of purple tablets, "Some cyanide pills are looking good right now, and they're grape-flavoured." She downed a shot glass of Everclear and told Anton to type up a counter-campaign.

Alex wondered aloud whether or not a counter-campaign would remove quorum status from the proposal. "I thought that you couldn't remove quorum from a proposal," she mused at Simone.

[Soviet Canuckistan]

"Well it's done, champagne Neville, now to kill this thing for 4 more hours!." Simone cheered, high-fiving Anton, hard at work typing.

[Damanucus]

"Well it's done, champagne Neville, now to kill this thing for 4 more hours!." Simone cheered, high-fiving Anton, hard at work typing.

Stephanie turns to Simone from her place at the bar, having overheard (read: eavesdropped) on her conversation. "Instead, Simone, we have to tangle with Alexandria Yadoru and her resolutions...again!" She grabs her drink, sculls its remaining contents, and places it back on the bar. "Another please, Neville, and make it a double." She turns back to Simone. "Do you mind if I join you, esteemed Ambassadors?"

[Unibot II]

A spacecraft dropped from the sky suddenly, emerging from the clouds and in one long swoop, crashing onto the grounds of the World Assembly as it ripped up the soil and the lawn. Plowing through the earth and pavement, smashing down pieces of contemporary arts in its wake and coming to a slow halt as the tip of the spacecraft punched through the bay-window and a portion of the front of the Strangers' Bar. Moving empty chairs and tables gently as it edged its way into the room accompanying the sound of twisting metal and active sparks, before concluding its journey. The spacecraft sat idly for a few seconds, but patrons of the bar payed little attention to the spacecraft.

Steam and smoke began to shoot out of pistons on the spacecraft as the metal hatch on the tip of the spacecraft fired off the hull and shot across the room, smashing into a shelf of mugs and dishes.

Eduard Heir climbed out of the hatch, to which several patrons of the pub groaned -- they should have known, only one man in the universe could make such a terribly destructive and unannounced introduction, all the while, yawning, completely oblivious to where he was and stinking of cheesios and liquor. The orange stained faced, overweight and bearded Eduard fell out of the hatch acting like a bear coming out of hibernation as he slide down the hull on his chest and smacked against the hardwood floor on his butt. Eduard turned around and stood up, struggling to navigate the room, giggling at the sensation of gravity as he walked in a curvy path through the Strangers' Bar, leaning on chairs and tables as he lost his balance all the while sipping on a silver pouch of packaged scotch and wearing a home-made astronautic suit.

Heir looked up at the wall, recognizing where he was; he struggled for words as his delirium started to wear off. "Is the Strangers' Bar a... chain restaurant...or am I not half-way across the galaxy?" asked Eduard in a concerned voice.

No one replied.

Eduard looked out the glass-front of the door (since the window and most of the bar was occupied by his spacecraft) and recognized the landscape as that of the World Assembly Headquarters' premises.

"Ah shit, taking the ship off auto-pilot was a bad idea," said Eduard, starring off into the distance with a grim face.

[Quadrimmina]

"Well it's done, champagne Neville, now to kill this thing for 4 more hours!." Simone cheered, high-fiving Anton, hard at work typing.

Stephanie turns to Simone from her place at the bar, having overheard (read: eavesdropped) on her conversation. "Instead, Simone, we have to tangle with Alexandria Yadoru and her resolutions...again!" She grabs her drink, sculls its remaining contents, and places it back on the bar. "Another please, Neville, and make it a double." She turns back to Simone. "Do you mind if I join you, esteemed Ambassadors?"

Alex looked at her phone in amazement. "It's...it's gone! Simone, everyone, it's time to party!" She then ordered tequila shots for all the ambassadors.

[Soviet Canuckistan]

Simone downs a couple of shots along with Anton, before addressing the delegates, "I thank you all for your appreciation in this matter, Yadoru has to learn how to deal with democracy, long live the WA!" Simone drank some more, hugged Anton and began to relax for the first time in many hours.

[Damanucus]

Simone downs a couple of shots along with Anton, before addressing the delegates, "I thank you all for your appreciation in this matter, Yadoru has to learn how to deal with democracy, long live the WA!" Simone drank some more, hugged Anton and began to relax for the first time in many hours.

Stephanie pulls over a chair to the group's table, straddling it as she sat, despite not formally receiving an invitation. "You know, as well as I do, that even if we manage to vote down these pieces of garbage, we may still have to tangle with any repeal she writes in order to remove the much better written and well-formed alternatives from the books. After all, a repeal is how she made her name." She takes a sip of her double scotch. "It is possible she may never learn the true meaning of democracy." She takes another sip, before she says something she would come to regret.

[East Klent]

Stevens and Mason were shocked, initially, by Heir's entrance, but upon hearing the news, they recovered quickly, "There is a God!" Stevens exclaimed.

"Thank heavens the proposal was killed; I do not think I would be able to even show my face here if such a sad excuse for legislation were to ever be put in place," Mason was elated.

The two veteran delegates raised their shot glasses and knocked them back.

After coughing for a few seconds, Stevens commented, "Now I remember why I stopped drinking tequila, too many blackouts."

Mason chortled, "Are you sure that was only because of the tequila?"

"Touche..." Stevens grumbled.

[Bears Armed]

Artorrios o SouthWoods is back at the karaoke machine _

"A more humane Mikado never
Did in Japan exist,
To nobody second,
I'm certainly reckoned
A true philanthropist.
It is my very humane endeavour
To make, to some extent,
Each evil liver
A running river
Of harmless merriment.

"My object all sublime
I shall achieve in time —
To let the punishment fit the crime —
The punishment fit the crime;
And make each prisoner pent
Unwillingly represent
A source of innocent merriment!
Of innocent merriment!

"All prosy dull society sinners,
Who chatter and bleat and bore,
Are sent to hear sermons
From mystical Germans
Who preach from ten till four.
The amateur tenor, whose vocal villainies
All desire to shirk,
Shall, during off-hours,
Exhibit his powers
To Madame Tussaud's waxwork.

"The lady who dyes a chemical yellow
Or stains her grey hair puce,
Or pinches her figure,
Is painted with vigour
And permanent walnut juice.
The idiot who, in railway carriages,
Scribbles on window-panes,
We only suffer
To ride on a buffer
In Parliamentary trains.

"My object all sublime
I shall achieve in time —
To let the punishment fit the crime —
The punishment fit the crime;
And make each prisoner pent
Unwillingly represent
A source of innocent merriment!
Of innocent merriment!

"The advertising quack who wearies
With tales of countless cures,
His teeth, I've enacted,
Shall all be extracted
By terrified amateurs.
The music-hall singer attends a series
Of masses and fugues and "ops"
By Bach, interwoven
With Spohr and Beethoven,
At classical Monday Pops.

"The billiard sharp who any one catches,
His doom's extremely hard —
He's made to dwell —
In a dungeon cell
On a spot that's always barred.
And there he plays extravagant matches
In fitless finger-stalls
On a cloth untrue
With a twisted cue
And elliptical billiard balls!

"My object all sublime
I shall achieve in time —
To let the punishment fit the crime —
The punishment fit the crime;
And make each prisoner pent
Unwillingly represent
A source of innocent merriment!
Of innocent merriment!"

[Retired WerePenguins]

Z enters the bar and walks towards the wonderful bar tender. "You will be pleased to know that we have delivered enough cases of fine Retired WerePenguin Single Malt (Scotch) Whiskey so that all who voted against the current resolution of prohibiting the second half of a very popular game show will be able to get one shot free of our marvelous beverage. I've got enough cases to ensure that there at least five thousand shots. Remember that it is one per person who voted, so if a delegate brags of 500 votes, just give him one. After one week from the end ofthe vote if the delegate or representative has not claimed their free shot you are free to sell it at the going rate. I'll keep an eye on the vote in case we get even more people to vote against this vote."

[Damanucus]

Z enters the bar and walks towards the wonderful bar tender. "You will be pleased to know that we have delivered enough cases of fine Retired WerePenguin Single Malt (Scotch) Whiskey so that all who voted against the current resolution of prohibiting the second half of a very popular game show will be able to get one shot free of our marvelous beverage. I've got enough cases to ensure that there at least five thousand shots. Remember that it is one per person who voted, so if a delegate brags of 500 votes, just give him one. After one week from the end ofthe vote if the delegate or representative has not claimed their free shot you are free to sell it at the going rate. I'll keep an eye on the vote in case we get even more people to vote against this vote."

Stephanie turns around, as she hears the words "free shot", and holds up a recently (and previously speedily) emptied glass. "Neville, I shall be the first to take up the fine Werepenguin ambassador's offer. We voted against, and were the first, so I shall again be the first to have a shot."

[Soviet Canuckistan]

Simone grabs a shot glass full of whiskey, shotguns it, and returns back to work.

[Moronist Decisions]

Jane Crick hates alcohol typically and has tried to keep the volume of 190 proof Everclear down since Robert Gatwick was transferred to Grays Harbor. That said, with all the Quelesian and other garbage present, she has recognized the complete insanity and difficulty of this job - in a manner almost unprecedented (but was unfolding) during her time as Vice-Minister and Chief Representative, and is now forcing her to quit her university job to take on the responsibilities of Deputy of the Lion AND Minister of Foreign Affairs, as well as this godforsaken job.

"Wow, that's nice. Thanks Z! Neville, one shot of the great Retired WerePenguin scotch whisky that is being proffered for free, please!"

[Stalliongrad and Far-Eastern Territories]

"I heard there was a free scotch for opponents of Yadoru's latest heap of tripe?" Says Dmitri Ironhoof as he wanders into the bar. "Hope it doesn't put too much of a dent in your budget."

Glass in hand, Dmitri pulls up a stool.

[Retired WerePenguins]

Z smiles. "You know, now that I think of it, I also voted against this resolution. I'm sure my boss meant for me to have a shot as well."

Taking the shot she downs the smooth whiskey in a moment. "Now that really does give one a much needed BUMP, does it not?"

[East Klent]

Stevens, being the adventurous drinker that he was, tried the WerePenguinian whiskey, knocking back the shot, "I do believe, you're right, Ambassador, it does give one a 'bump'."

[Damanucus]

Z smiles. "You know, now that I think of it, I also voted against this resolution. I'm sure my boss meant for me to have a shot as well."

Taking the shot she downs the smooth whiskey in a moment. "Now that really does give one a much needed BUMP, does it not?"

"That indeed it does, Z," Stephanie agrees. "I do wonder though how long they left it to mature; I haven't tasted anything so delicious." She looks up to her sign on the wall, then back to the collective group. "By the way, my good ambassadors, I do apologize for changing the subject so abruptly, but any of you know any Ambassadors who are cute and single?"

[Alqania]

Lord Raekevik entered the bar (as if on cue?), naïvely hoping that people would be discussing other things than proposals, perhaps which football team was the best, which was the most fabulously coloured beam to use in laser weaponry, whose office intern was the hottest or any other silly topic... just NOT proposals, he hoped.

"An Irish coffee, please", the Ambassador ordered as he took a seat by the bar, casually inspecting the panorama of Ambassadors, Delegates and other delinquents.

[East Klent]

Stevens watched his colleague enter and take a seat. He then glanced back at Stephanie and then at himself in the reflection of his scotch.

"To answer your question, yes, yes I do know of a few..." Stevens answered with his signature sly yet charming grin.

[Damanucus]

Stevens watched his colleague enter and take a seat. He then glanced back at Stephanie and then at himself in the reflection of his scotch.

"To answer your question, yes, yes I do know of a few..." Stevens answered with his signature sly yet charming grin.

Stephanie looks down at Stevens, then back up at his face. "My dear fellow, you are very poorly equipped to satisfy me; you aren't even the right gender."

[East Klent]

Stevens chuckles, "You thought I was talking about me? No, no, no, my fellow Ambassador, I already have a signifigant other, this grin I have is just a reflex, pure muscle memory, and I'm sorry if it gave you the wrong impression."

Stevens pauses to finish his scotch, "I said I knew of a few possible candidates, and I do think they could be of interest to you," he further explains.

[Damanucus]

Stevens chuckles, "You thought I was talking about me? No, no, no, my fellow Ambassador, I already have a signifigant other, this grin I have is just a reflex, pure muscle memory, and I'm sorry if it gave you the wrong impression."

Stevens pauses to finish his scotch, "I said I knew of a few possible candidates, and I do think they could be of interest to you," he further explains.

"Then speak on, good Ambassador."

[East Klent]

The grin quickly evaporates from Stevens' face, realizing that he can not remeber the names of the 'candidates' he had previously mentioned.

Great, Stevens, you've made a complete fool out of yourself in front of a senior delegate... nothing you can't fix, Stevens thinks to himself.

"Uh..." Stevens knows he has to think of something quickly, "Well, to tell you the truth, in order to give you a good 'short list' I would have to know what it is that you are seeking, exactly," he says, further delaying a direct answer.

[Damanucus]

The grin quickly evaporates from Stevens' face, realizing that he can not remeber the names of the 'candidates' he had previously mentioned.

Great, Stevens, you've made a complete fool out of yourself in front of a senior delegate... nothing you can't fix, Stevens thinks to himself.

"Uh..." Stevens knows he has to think of something quickly, "Well, to tell you the truth, in order to give you a good 'short list' I would have to know what it is that you are seeking, exactly," he says, further delaying a direct answer.

Stephanie cocks an eyebrow. "You don't know any representatives, do you? Let alone ones I could possibly match with."