NationStates Issues **SPOILER ALERT**

[Zwangzug]

Alternative version of 528.1 for nations that have banned guns:

"while waving a compound crossbow"

[Trotterdam]

Alternative version of 528.1 for nations that have banned guns:

"while waving a compound crossbow"

Question: did you ban guns even for the police and military (as per #020 option 2)? Because I've failed to get it on nations that have banned guns for everyone except the police and military - and since it's civilian weapon use that is the topic here, I suspect that's an incorrectly-coded validity. (If the point is to relegalize guns, then that's possible to do even in a nation that's completely gun-free, so I don't think that's it.)

[Zwangzug]

Alternative version of 528.1 for nations that have banned guns:

"while waving a compound crossbow"

Question: did you ban guns even for the police and military (as per #020 option 2)? Because I've failed to get it on nations that have banned guns for everyone except the police and military - and since it's civilian weapon use that is the topic here, I suspect that's an incorrectly-coded validity. (If the point is to relegalize guns, then that's possible to do even in a nation that's completely gun-free, so I don't think that's it.)

I probably did, yeah. (Although the military is nonexistent and the police small-to-zero. But I think I would have taken the "ban all the guns" option whenever it came around, a while ago.)

[Bears Armed]

[box]#633 Sound Judgement

The Issue

At a recent international sporting event, Bigtopian fans proudly sung their national anthem: Bigger And Cleverer. Meanwhile, the @@DEMONYMNOUNPLURAL@@ in the crowd each sang half a dozen different tunes, highlighting the fact that @@NAME@@ still doesn't have an official national anthem.

Are you sure that it's @@DEMONYMNAMEPLURAL@@ there? For this nation it pluralised the Demonym Adjective (to give "Urrshishes"...) instead!

[Candlewhisper Archive]

[box]#633 Sound Judgement

The Issue

At a recent international sporting event, Bigtopian fans proudly sung their national anthem: Bigger And Cleverer. Meanwhile, the @@DEMONYMNOUNPLURAL@@ in the crowd each sang half a dozen different tunes, highlighting the fact that @@NAME@@ still doesn't have an official national anthem.

Are you sure that it's @@DEMONYMNAMEPLURAL@@ there? For this nation it pluralised the Demonym Adjective (to give "Urrshishes"...) instead!

Well spotted. An error was made, now fixed. @@DEMONYMNOUNPLURAL@@ should be what you get now.

[Christian Democrats]

The issues have been updated.

If you're posting an issue using a nation different than the one on which you received the issue, please change the macros.

[Ransium]

628 is TBD? Aww man I was so excited to see it in the list. Barbarossistanian South Brasilistan posted it:

and here's #628


The Issue

Large forest fires are raging across Barbarossistanian South Brasilistan. Tens of thousands of acres have already been burned, houses in rural communities have been destroyed, and the resultant smoke has drifted into Kaiserstadt, ruining your plans to spend the day tanning.
The Debate

“This is just another example of public sector failure,” opines former timber baron and current timber industry lobbyist Kanya Räikkönen. “Put these forests back in private hands, and we’ll have these forest humming again in no time - with chainsaws, that is. We’ll clear out all this built-up fuel faster than you can say, ‘TIMBER’. You can even call us environmentalists because it’s in our own interest to plant new trees, and then cut them down again, of course.”

“That’s just not cool, man,” mutters Heech, of the stoner comedy duo Heech and Hemp. “These forests have evolved with fire for aeons. The problem is Man, man. We need to stop ‘managing’ forests and just let the fires do their thing. Communities living in forested areas need to either move out or adapt to fires. As for the smoke...” He pauses and takes a long puff of something you can’t quite see, then after coughing uncontrollably for a while adds: “...we just need to adapt.”

“No!” cries former martial arts protege and current forest ranger Dirk Frederickson, while bribing you with a picnic basket that was allegedly taken from a bear. “We just need a bit more money. Not just for fire suppression, but for preventative measures, like creating defensible spaces around homes, thinning out logs and small trees, prescribed fire, and arresting potential arsonists. Fires will be smaller and more manageable and everyone will be happy.”

“All this hand-wringing about forest land management is so interesting,” sarcastically comments Dave Bergman, whose family lost their home to the fire. “Oh, wait, no, I don’t care, BECAUSE MY HOUSE BURNT DOWN! Thousands of people have lost their homes and what are you doing about it? We need emergency help now. Let’s take all the money we’re wasting on so-called ‘land management’ and put it into something useful, like disaster relief and rebuilding our homes and communities.”

Issue by The Mangrovian Primitivists of Ransium and The Holy Blue Isles of Tishanda

Edited by Nation of Quebec

[Trotterdam]

Barbarossistanian South Brasilistan forgot to post the title. It's "Only @@LEADER@@ Can Prevent Forest Fires", unchanged from the submission.

[Eaischpnaeieacgkque Bhcieaghpodsttditf]

634

Bullet Time

The Issue

Regular traffic congestion within @@NAME@@’s interstate highways have resulted in a flurry of petitions being sent to you demanding the development of a Maglev bullet train connecting the nation’s major cities. Apparently there was going to be a demonstration outside your front door as well, but the protesters got stuck in traffic.

The Debate

Moments before you are about to go home after a long day at work, an intruder intercepts you at your front door. His face is a deeper shade of red than the sunset outside your window. He yells at you: “Eight hours! Do you have any idea how it feels to sit in traffic for eight hours? Be quiet! How can I do good work when the commute takes the whole day? Listen, most other developed nations already have a high-speed, high-efficiency railway systems, and not having one is not doing us any favors, economically or for our mental health. We Need Bullet Trains! Give us Bullet Trains!”

Accept

“That angry fellow is correct, you know...” says @@RANDOMFEMALENAME@@, an agreeable businesswoman who gently guides the furious commuter to the back door, “but who is to say the burden of the cost should be on the government’s back? Me and my colleagues in Budget Rail Incorporated can get @@NAME@@ high speed connections with no cost to your taxpayers. We’ve got suppliers of nearly-new metal, fairly decent quality second hand trains, engines that almost passed emission standards. We’ve even identified which arable land owners you’ll need to force to sell to us to make this service fast and profitable. Just sign, quickly, here, here, here, and umm... initials here...”

Accept

“You can’t do it!” groans @@RANDOMNAME@@, ecologically minded pop-musician with the recent #1 hit I Hugged A Tree and I Liked It. “Mother Nature gives us love, and look at how we treat Her. We’re binding her flesh with steel rails. I mean, forests, the trees, all that... they give us oxygen and stuff. Dodge the bullet, save the world!”

Accept

“Slow down, now. Slow down, all...” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, a villager visiting the capital for the first time. “More railways is a fine thing for all, but why have fancy high speed trains that zoom past all the interesting places on the way? I think you should be building a LOW speed rail, that stops at all the picturesque hamlets and towns, and brings visitors to them. Stop by Little Droppings - that’s my own town, by the way - and I’ll brew you a nice cup of tea.”

Accept

Dismiss This Issue

Issue by The Republic of Rubyna

Edited by Candlewhisper Archive

[Republic of Vitalia]

Is there any way to know the date of creation of an issue?

[Altito Asmoro]

Is there any way to know the date of creation of an issue?

Hmm, not that I know of.

Will we get another "issue series" or we can contribute to make one?

[Tinhampton]

Will we get another "issue series" or we can contribute to make one?

You mean issue chains? Yes, there is the facility to make them - but be warned, a substantial portion of your time will be taken up...

[The Candy Of Bottles]

Just managed to get 605 on a puppet, @@DEMONYMPLURAL@@ should be @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ in option 3.

[Zwangzug]

624.3 is @@RANDOMFIRSTNAME@@ Stockholm.

[Tinhampton]

Attila is a new mens' first name. I know this because the first name of the uncle I got on Issue #585 "Are You Not Entertained?" was Attila.

[Fikekkia]

Was I wrong to read this issue with an in-game filter? Apparently option 4 literally does mean "ALL" because immediately after selecting it my Environmental Beauty went from 600 to 50.

Or perhaps the fires burned down the rainforest on their own, regardless of which option I would have chosen.

~~~

and here's #628


The Issue

Large forest fires are raging across Barbarossistanian South Brasilistan. Tens of thousands of acres have already been burned, houses in rural communities have been destroyed, and the resultant smoke has drifted into Kaiserstadt, ruining your plans to spend the day tanning.
The Debate

1. “This is just another example of public sector failure,” opines former timber baron and current timber industry lobbyist Kanya Räikkönen. “Put these forests back in private hands, and we’ll have these forest humming again in no time - with chainsaws, that is. We’ll clear out all this built-up fuel faster than you can say, ‘TIMBER’. You can even call us environmentalists because it’s in our own interest to plant new trees, and then cut them down again, of course.”

2. “That’s just not cool, man,” mutters Heech, of the stoner comedy duo Heech and Hemp. “These forests have evolved with fire for aeons. The problem is Man, man. We need to stop ‘managing’ forests and just let the fires do their thing. Communities living in forested areas need to either move out or adapt to fires. As for the smoke...” He pauses and takes a long puff of something you can’t quite see, then after coughing uncontrollably for a while adds: “...we just need to adapt.”

3. “No!” cries former martial arts protege and current forest ranger Dirk Frederickson, while bribing you with a picnic basket that was allegedly taken from a bear. “We just need a bit more money. Not just for fire suppression, but for preventative measures, like creating defensible spaces around homes, thinning out logs and small trees, prescribed fire, and arresting potential arsonists. Fires will be smaller and more manageable and everyone will be happy.”

4. “All this hand-wringing about forest land management is so interesting,” sarcastically comments Dave Bergman, whose family lost their home to the fire. “Oh, wait, no, I don’t care, BECAUSE MY HOUSE BURNT DOWN! Thousands of people have lost their homes and what are you doing about it? We need emergency help now. Let’s take all the money we’re wasting on so-called ‘land management’ and put it into something useful, like disaster relief and rebuilding our homes and communities.”

Issue by The Mangrovian Primitivists of Ransium and The Holy Blue Isles of Tishanda

Edited by Nation of Quebec

[Trotterdam]

Was I wrong to read this issue with an in-game filter? Apparently option 4 literally does mean "ALL" because immediately after selecting it my Environmental Beauty went from 600 to 50.

Or perhaps the fires burned down the rainforest on their own, regardless of which option I would have chosen.

Wrong thread for that. Here's the right one.

And for the record, 600 Environmental Beauty pretty low already for that stat.

[Noahs Second Country]

Number 634: Bullet Time
The Issue

Regular traffic congestion within Noahs Second Country’s interstate highways have resulted in a flurry of petitions being sent to you demanding the development of a Maglev bullet train connecting the nation’s major cities. Apparently there was going to be a demonstration outside your front door as well, but the protesters got stuck in traffic.

The Debate

Moments before you are about to go home after a long day at work, an intruder intercepts you at your front door. His face is a deeper shade of red than the sunset outside your window. He yells at you: “Eight hours! Do you have any idea how it feels to sit in traffic for eight hours? Be quiet! How can I do good work when the commute takes the whole day? Listen, most other developed nations already have a high-speed, high-efficiency railway systems, and not having one is not doing us any favors, economically or for our mental health. We Need Bullet Trains! Give us Bullet Trains!”

Accept

“That angry fellow is correct, you know...” says Elizabeth Oz, an agreeable businesswoman who gently guides the furious commuter to the back door, “but who is to say the burden of the cost should be on the government’s back? Me and my colleagues in Budget Rail Incorporated can get Noahs Second Country high speed connections with no cost to your taxpayers. We’ve got suppliers of nearly-new metal, fairly decent quality second hand trains, engines that almost passed emission standards. We’ve even identified which arable land owners you’ll need to force to sell to us to make this service fast and profitable. Just sign, quickly, here, here, here, and umm... initials here...”

Accept

“You can’t do it!” groans Ksenya Jackman, ecologically minded pop-musician with the recent #1 hit I Hugged A Tree and I Liked It. “Mother Nature gives us love, and look at how we treat Her. We’re binding her flesh with steel rails. I mean, forests, the trees, all that... they give us oxygen and stuff. Dodge the bullet, save the world!”

Accept

“Slow down, now. Slow down, all...” says Engelbert Cheswick, a villager visiting the capital for the first time. “More railways is a fine thing for all, but why have fancy high speed trains that zoom past all the interesting places on the way? I think you should be building a LOW speed rail, that stops at all the picturesque hamlets and towns, and brings visitors to them. Stop by Little Droppings - that’s my own town, by the way - and I’ll brew you a nice cup of tea.”

Accept

Dismiss This Issue

Issue by The Republic of Rubyna

Edited by Candlewhisper Archive

[Noahs Second Country]

Number 636: Going on the Cyber Offensive
The Issue

A student was recently suspended by a school for posting negative comments about a fellow classmate on an online gossip column. The offensive message read “Sean’s dad is such a drunk, that he didn’t just lose his front door keys, he lost his whole front door... oh, and his house... and his job. Wow, sucks to be his son, huh?”. As both the suspended student’s parents are celebrities, there’s been a lot of media coverage of the incident, and now everybody is talking about it. Some are calling this harmless fun, while others are labelling it as cyberbullying. It seems like everybody wants to know where you stand on this.

The Debate

“This is a complete violation of my rights,” shouts Freddy Nahasapeemapetilon, the amateur columnist brat. “I can say what I want outside of school, as long as I like, don’t, like, harm anyone. Like, the whole free speech thing, you know. I wasn’t in school, so they can’t punish me. People just need to be allowed to say whatever. By the way, check out my latest roasting of this one geography teacher at my school who doesn’t take showers.”

Accept

“Schools need to be stricter,” whispers Victoria Kaine, worriedly looking around before nibbling on a bar of chocolate. “People used to use my name, but now I’m just ‘Ugly Fat-Face’. Please, make it stop! Schools should strictly punish students who say rude things online.”

Accept

“Kids these days, they’re geni.. geniei... uh... geniuses!” exclaims Ingmar Christmas, your Minister of Solutions. “This is the best idea we’ve had in a while! With elections coming up, we can hire a few of these prodigies of the put-down, and pay them to work for us. The kids can, as they say, ‘roast’ the other politicians, and make you look great in comparison!”

Accept

Dismiss This Issue

Issue by The Holy Empire of Noahs Second Country

Edited by Candlewhisper Archive

[Drasnia]

#637: Little Pizza History

The Issue

Prominent restaurant chain Pop’s Eatery recently announced plans to tear down the historic Cash Mansion in @@CAPITAL@@ and replace it with a fast food restaurant. Disgusted by the impending destruction of a national landmark, two dozen history students have surrounded the site, delaying the building’s demolition and causing just enough ruckus to get your attention.

The Debate

“We cannot accept this blatant destruction of our culture!” cries a surprisingly agile social studies teacher, leaping into your office window after scaling the side of the capitol building. “It’s common knowledge that Douglas Cash was the leader of the revolutionaries that founded this country... or was he the inventor of that spinning doohickey? Either way, the Cash residence is a priceless piece of our national history. The government should protect the site as a national landmark... and put more funding towards historical education while you’re at it.”

“Out with the old and in with the new!” opines Frank Márquez, owner of Pop’s Eatery, while handing out free samples to everyone in sight. “These fried saltballs were invented right here in @@NAME@@ by one of my top chefs, and at least in my opinion, that’s some @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ culture worth celebrating. If you assign a few more cops to keep away the overeducated hooligans from my stores, then I could have a free hand to open Pop’s Eateries on every corner of @@NAME@@.”

“Why not have your cake and eat it too?” asks your underachieving Culture Minister, George W. Humperdink, while tucking into a tray of vol-au-vents taken from a recent gallery opening. “By which I mean have food AND culture at the same time. We should preserve these historical sites and allow - no, actually, make that REQUIRE - that they all have restaurants built within them. Imagine it: a roast on the spit in an old castle, tea and scones in noble palaces, all-you-can-eat-buffets in museums commemorating the Great @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ Famine. Now that’s what I call culture!”

Issue by The Intrasolar Republic of Oppressia FTDOF

Edited by Lenyo

[Mironus]

638: Please, Leader, I Want Something More

The Issue

On your way to work this morning, you noticed an unusually high number of orphans pickpocketing and ‘asking for more’ from passing strangers. Realizing that this may put a stain on Mironus’s reputation, you have asked for opinions on how to deal with this orphan overcrowding problem.

The Debate

1. “Gawd bless youse, Deus, but can’t ya spare a copper or two for us poor little cherubs?” meekly asks an orphan known as Minuscule Max, who has managed to pick your pocket without you noticing. “The old orphanage is in a right sorry state, an’ no mistake. Just yesterday we ‘ad ta burn our caps and clogs to have somethin’ to warm ourselves by. All we askin’ is that you ‘ave a think about us: maybe them fightin’ soldiers could get less, and we could get more?

2. “I agree that these children should not be left to fend for themselves, but let’s not be too hasty about lowering military funding,” reminds your semi-compassionate Minister of Defense who prefers to ‘kill enemies kindly’. “In fact, why do we even need these orphanages? These children are sponging off the government’s teat and all we get in return is a bloated welfare budget! All orphaned children should be sent to military training academies, and then they can repay us for our generosity by fighting for our glorious Divine Right!”

3. “I can’t believe what I’m hearing!” gasps factory owner Frank Scrooge, whose remarkably clean hands have never known a day of honest labour. “How can we be sinking so low as to even consider wasting such a valuable resource on the military? I agree that we should get these kids off the government teat, but we should lower the working age so they can work and earn money to fend for themselves! Send these orphans to work in my factories and I’ll pay them a very ‘generous’ wage.”

4. “You know, I think our friends in Dàguó have the right idea with their one child policy,” suggests population control expert Colin Zhu while going over the latest birth statistics. “Mironus has a population of 4.954 billion and growing. We can barely keep up as it is without adding orphans into the mix. I propose adopting Dàguó’s one child policy here while offering generous tax incentives for the good people of Mironus to adopt our remaining orphans. It may be a tad restrictive, but the people will thank me when they aren’t suffocating on the subway.”

^{Issue by Niklaustan
Edited by Nation of Quebec}

I chose option two, which turned out to be perfect for this nation.

[Maljaratas]

638 with Macros:

NO. 638

Please, @@LEADER@@, I Want Something More

The Issue
On your way to work this morning, you noticed an unusually high number of orphans pickpocketing and ‘asking for more’ from passing strangers. Realizing that this may put a stain on @@NAME@@’s reputation, you have asked for opinions on how to deal with this orphan overcrowding problem.

The Debate
1. “Gawd bless youse, @@LEADER@@, but can’t ya spare a copper or two for us poor little cherubs?” meekly asks an orphan known as Minuscule Max, who has managed to pick your pocket without you noticing. “The old orphanage is in a right sorry state, an’ no mistake. Just yesterday we ‘ad ta burn our caps and clogs to have somethin’ to warm ourselves by. All we askin’ is that you ‘ave a think about us: maybe them fightin’ soldiers could get less, and we could get more?

2. “I agree that these children should not be left to fend for themselves, but let’s not be too hasty about lowering military funding,” reminds your semi-compassionate Minister of Defense who prefers to ‘kill enemies kindly’. “In fact, why do we even need these orphanages? These children are sponging off the government’s teat and all we get in return is a bloated welfare budget! All orphaned children should be sent to military training academies, and then they can repay us for our generosity by fighting for our glorious @@TYPE@@!”

3. “I can’t believe what I’m hearing!” gasps factory owner @@RANDOMFIRSTNAME@@ Scrooge, whose remarkably clean hands have never known a day of honest labour. “How can we be sinking so low as to even consider wasting such a valuable resource on the military? I agree that we should get these kids off the government teat, but we should lower the working age so they can work and earn money to fend for themselves! Send these orphans to work in my factories and I’ll pay them a very ‘generous’ wage.”

4. “You know, I think our friends in Dàguó have the right idea with their one child policy,” suggests population control expert Oprah Lopez while going over the latest birth statistics. “@@NAME@@ has a population of @@POPULATION@@ and growing. We can barely keep up as it is without adding orphans into the mix. I propose adopting Dàguó’s one child policy here while offering generous tax incentives for the good people of Maljaratas to adopt our remaining orphans. It may be a tad restrictive, but the people will thank me when they aren’t suffocating on the subway.”

Issue by Niklaustan
Edited by Nation of Quebec

[Trotterdam]

Please stay on the lookout for multiple versions of #636's last option.

[Maljaratas]

Please stay on the lookout for multiple versions of #637's last option.

I'll do my best

Edit: I'll still look for other versions for 636, should I get the issue

[Trotterdam]

Sorry, I typed the wrong number.

Though really, if you find any other options on #637, report those too. I just don't think you will.