World Bowl XXIX- Everything Thread (IC-Only)

by **Banija** » Thu May 05, 2016 8:14 pm

The All-Banija Sports Magazine
The only nationwide publication that is all sports, all the time!

Offensive struggles the source of Banija's first loss at the World Bowl as they fall 13-3 at home to Taeshan

Quarterback Slawomir Kovach reacts after throwing his 4th interception of the game in the 4th quarter

BUSUKUMA- The Kingdom of Banija has had a very simple strategy when it comes to competing in this World Bowl. Play solid defense, do not turn the ball over, keep possesion of the football, and they will come out on top. Their defense has delivered magnificent performance after magnificent performance in a row, and even with an offense that only averaged 12.8 points per game in the first 5 group stage games, Banija escaped the group stage with an undefeated 5-0 record that put them in the driver's seat to win this group. While their offense struggled heavily to move the ball against their opponents, they at least were taking care of the football. Kovach was not playing all that well, but he was not going out there and losing games. We mentioned that a little in our last article, in how Banija would need improved quarterback play to compete in this tournament.

Of course, there was always going to be a game where the quarterback seriously struggled. The question was, how would the team respond? And that game was today, a home game against Taeshan, where Banija had a chance to probably put away the group with another victory over Taeshan. However, Slawomir Kovach had an absolutely horrible game. This brings us back to flashbacks to his NSCF 12 season, where he was temporarily benched, though he missed the end of that season due to a separated shoulder. In this game there was no injury, but Slawomir Kovach had 5 turnovers in the game. He had 4 interceptions and 1 lost fumble, and his struggles were the source of the Banijan loss, as his three 3rd quarter turnovers(2 interceptions and one fumble) led directly to Taeshan's 13 points, which were all directly off of turnovers.

The trouble should have been noticed in the first half. With Banija up 3-0 towards the end of the 2nd quarter, the game's difference being a 47 yard Beyne Yemane in the 1st quarter. Slawomir Kovach ran a very effective 2 minute drill, moving Banija 68 yards down the football field, to get to the 13 yard line of Taeshan with 14 seconds left. Kovach was then supposed to throw a fade to schoolmate receiver Vena Resnick. Instead of doing that however, Slawomir Kovach rolled and tried to force the ball into the middle of the field, trying to force it to star tight end Chritos Cosse. Cosse was overthrown, and the ball was intercepted by a Taeshan safety in the back of the end zone at the end of the quarter. A great scoring opportunity was blown, but it was a sign of worse things to come in the 2nd half.

The third quarter was an absolutely terrible quarter for Slawomir Kovach. On three straight drives, he threw interceptions, and those led directly to every single point that Taeshan put on the scoreboard. They won this game, but terrible play from Kovach let their opponents have it. On the 3rd quarter's opening drive, Kovach was looking over the middle of the field to an open Chritos Cosse, but he was overthrown and the ball was intercepted at the Banijan 33 yard line. Two first downs and a short field goal later, and the game was tied. On the very next drive, Banija was able to get a few first downs on the ground. But, on a 3rd down & 3 at the Taeshan 44, Slawomir Kovach had an ill-advised throw towards the sideline picked off by a Taeshan cornerback and returned to the Banijan 23 yard line. Banija did force a 3 & out, but a short field goal was kicked and the next thing you know, Banija was down 6-3.

The final turnover of the 3rd quarter turned out to be the nail in the coffin. Banija was able to drive down the field after that 2nd Taeshan field goal, and it seemed as if this time, Slawomir Kovach would be able to make the throws. The kid has tons of confidence, especially winning two Celestia Conference titles in the NSCF, and he was able to drive his team down to the Taeshan 15 yard line. However, Slawomir Kovach would make another poor decision in the red zone, making Banija 0-2 on the night in the red zone. In the face of pressure under a heavy blitz, Kovach wildly threw the ball over the middle of the field to receiver Robel Kassa. Unfortunately, the ball was picked off and then returned 97 yards for a score the other way. The Banijans, who had at the end of the 2nd quarter thought they could go up 10-0 on Taeshan, were stunned as the Taeshan secondary, in their own stadium, conducted a turnaround of epic proportions and gave their team a 13-3 lead halfway through the 3rd quarter.

Slawomir Kovach played for the remainder of the game, but the Banijans never threatened again. His 4th quarter fumble sealed the deal, as Taeshan was able to run out the clock after that. Head Coach Ezekiel Daniachew was not happy with his team's performance, especially on offense. "This tournament is going to make you face adversity. The teams at this level are too good to play like we did today. Five turnovers? All of their points coming from turnovers? That means we are simply giving away points, and that is absolutely unacceptable at this level of competition. All options, and when I say that I mean absolutely everything is on the table, will be evaluated to make sure that this kind of offensive performance does not happen again."

While he did not mention Slawomir Kovach by name, the implication was serious. It was rumored that there would be a quarterback competition, and that was only confirmed when Head Coach Ezekiel Daniachew avoided a question when asked about his confidence in Slawomir Kovach right now. He laid it out in pretty bare terms how the Banijans, if they wanted to achieve their goals, needed to have consistent play at the quarterback position. It is unclear who he will choose to start at this point, though he is known to be a head coach that favors continuity. That gives the inside track to Kovach, but with Kovach's confidence shot, he might turn to the more experienced veteran Myles Debaba, who would definitely be itching at the chance to prove himself on the global stage.

by **Sarejo** » Thu May 05, 2016 11:21 pm

SAREJOAN NATIONAL NEWS

Sports section

Rising back from the bottom

After three heartbreaking defeats, one of which at home, the Emperors pulled away a jaw-dropping shutout against Vilemyr again last night. The Emperors demolished Vilemyr at every play, on all sides of the ball. For a portion of the game it was thought that Vilemyr would never even cross into Sarejoan territory, until a lucky fumble recovery put them on the Emperor's 48 yard line, following which a twenty-yard sack put them back into their place. Vilemyr never succeeded in getting the ball across the 50 again, however. The finishing blow that drove Vilemyr into the green turf was a thirteen yard stripsack recovery for a touchdown by rookie Carlos Becerra who was barely out of training camp with his professional team before being called up to compete on the national team.

Depsite this amazing success, many fans are still bitter and unimpressed.

"Congrats guys, you can beat one of the sh*ttiest teams in the whole tournament, I hope you feel like the titans you aren't." Wrote one fan.

"You can beat a team whose quarterback can't even hold onto the ball long enough to throw it! Congratu-f*cking-lations guys, here's a participation trophy! #Emperorsofwhat" Wrote another.

As always, our hearts and wishes of good luck are with our boys who are representing our nation.

works? · by **Abanhfleft** » Fri May 06, 2016 8:00 am

Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five Part Six Part Seven Part Eight Part Nine Part Ten Part Eleven Part Twelve Part Thirteen Part Fourteen Part Fifteen Part Sixteen Part Seventeen

No Place For Heroes, Part Eighteen

Al Jawal, Gharbambiyah

He knew that he was risking not only his position within his country's new government, but also his life, but Colonel General Stephane Eskalumbuye saw no other way to do this except going out here by himself. He was dealing with family, after all.

It was an open secret that Colonel General Eskalumbuye was related to Edward Eskalumbuye of the so-called "Emirate of Al Jawal"; in fact, the two of them were brothers. But what no one knew, or at least Stephane hoped that no one knew, was that while he had been public in his criticisms of his misguided brother and had been the face of the government's constant calls for Edward to return to the fold, Stephane was also secretly supplying Edward with information. Nothing that would get any Gharbambiyan troops killed, but he did tell Edward about when the government was preparing to move in on his headquarters so that his rebellious brother could have time to get out and regroup somewhere else. There was no guarantee that the Gharbambiyans, or the World Assembly troops in the country for that matter, wouldn't have orders to shoot to kill Edward.

But just in case Stephane found that blood was indeed thicker than water, which he did, he had been stationed in the capital, Gharbambiyah City, as commander of the local garrison, and within arm's reach of Isaiah Cabulovowino. Cabulovowino hadn't risen to be a field marshal of the army by being trusting.

It wasn't easy to sneak out of the capital to tell Edward about the latest developments in the government's pursuit of him, but Stephane had to do it anyway. Eddie might have been stupid for declaring something that was tantamount to a rebellion against Gharbambiyah, but he was still Stephane's younger brother. People, Stephane realized, would do anything to keep their family safe.

And it wasn't as if he was hiding his journey through the small country. Stephane was a colonel general and had the prerogative to be anywhere in the country where he wanted to be. That he was doing it alone and without his entourage was a little bit suspicious, but he had always claimed that he was performing surprise inspections on the nation's regiments and make sure that they were at the level that he wanted them to be.

He passed by three checkpoints on the road from Gharbambiyah City to Al Jawal. The first roadblock was the hardest part, but he dealt with that just by flashing his Army identification and the "surprise inspection" line. He breezed past the other two checkpoints, and he suspected that the troops in the first checkpoint had called ahead to say that Colonel General Eskalumbuye was passing by and should be allowed to proceed uninterrupted.

Stephane didn't know where exactly Edward's headquarters were, lest he be forced to divulge it to the rest of the Supreme Council of Decisions, but he didn't have to know the location anyway. All he needed was to be stopped by his brother's men and taken to his base.

This time, he was taken to an abandoned apartment building dating back to the final days of Abdul Fakkadi, Gharbambiyah's first strongman dictator and role model of Isaiah Cabulovowino. Edward's militias were scattered all throughout the place, resting and reloading their weapons and smoking hashish, marijuana, and other local drugs. Stephane passed by a room where a white foreigner, the son of the World Assembly general, had been tied to a chair, beaten, and then fed some hash to keep him docile.

There was another room where two militiamen were keeping guard. Two white women were inside, and both had chains around their wrists and ankles. One of the women had her bound hands tied to the ceiling while the other woman had a crude bandage around her head, and she had allowed to lean back on the wall. Stephane turned his head away and followed the militiaman leading him onward.

The militiaman knocked on the door of what was supposed to be the landlord's office, and another militiaman opened the door and greeted the first militiaman with the muzzle of his Kalashnikov. The two of them exchanged words in Gharbambiyan and the second militiaman nodded his head. The first militiaman jerked his head at Stephane and at the door: his brother was ready to receive him. Stephane took a long, deep breath, let it out as slowly as he could, and then he went into the office.

There could hardly be any two brothers who were so different from each other, at least in the physical sense. Whereas Stephane was the big and muscular brother, Edward was the thin and scrawny brother. Stephane, being the loyal government forces' general, was well-fed and showed it in his stocky and well-built body. Edward, being the rebel leader up against a ruthless dictator, also showed that he was growing malnourished from his constant flights from the clutches of the Cabulovowino government. He had little if any muscle and fat in his arms and legs, his teeth were yellowing, and there was a strange redness in his eyes.

"By Allah's name, what happened to you, Edward?" Stephane found himself asking. "You certainly look the worse for wear!"

"Good evening to you too, Stephane," Edward said, ignoring Stephane's statements. "I'm doing fine, thank you for asking. So, brother Stephane, what brings you to my humble abode?"

"That's funny," Stephane muttered. "I would have thought that this was the best place you've ever slept in."

"Don't patronize me, Oyekanmi," Edward said. "I may have been born in a filthy hospital room and you may have been born in the Palace, but we are both still sons of the last Emir."

Stephane kept silent and merely nodded his head. Their father, Isidore Abdulsalam Eskalumbuye, was indeed the last Emir of Al Jawal. Abdulsalam had been stripped of his title as Emir after Abdul Fakkadi had overthrown the Caliph of Gharbambiyah in his campaign to remove all traces of monarchism and imperialism in the country. For all intents and purposes, there is no longer any Emir of Al Jawal, but it looked as if Edward Eskalumbuye wanted to change that, even if only symbolically.

"The government is closing in on you once again, Ojiogwu," Stephane said. "You will begin to regret kidnapping the son of the World Assembly general. You have already seen the efforts to which he will go to bring his son back, brother."

"They were only a handful of foreigners," Edward retorted. "Nothing my men couldn't handle."

"They were nothing your men couldn't handle?" Stephane repeated. "If these foreigners were nothing that your men could handle, I shudder to think how they would against an enemy that they truly fear. That handful of foreigners killed at least a hundred of your men, Edward! And those foreigners weren't even soldiers at that! They were merely agents of Abanhfleft's internal security ministry! How would your men stand up against a real army?"

"That's why I have you here, though, isn't it, brother?" Edward asked back. "You come here to tell me if the government is closing in on me so my men won't have to face the army!"

"Yes, that's true," Stephane said, "but how long will it take before you finally run out of hiding places, and you have to face the army? How will you and your men handle that, then?"

"That won't happen sometime soon," Edward said, waving off the concern. "Why bother myself with events in the far future?"

"Damn it, Edward!" Stephane said, slamming a fist into the table between him and his brother. "There is no more sometime soon for you and your emirate! The government has eyes and ears in each and every one of your hiding holes! There is literally no more escape for you, Edward! The army has backed you into a corner, and you will now have to fight them to get out!"

"How come you have only told me this now that the situation has become like this?" Edward asked his older brother. "Has the government finally taken your loyalty and trust from your own brother, your flesh and blood?"

"Shut up, Ojiogwu, you know that that is not true!" Stephane shouted. "Security is growing tighter by the minute in Gharbambiyah City, and Cabulovowino is growing more and more suspicious of the people around him! I have tried my best to deflect his attention away from you and your revolutionaries, but kidnapping the general's son was the last straw! Cabulovowino will not have the families of foreigners working to keep him in power from being taken prisoner by the rebels of his own country!"

"Then that must mean that it's a good thing that we both have no family aside from each other, does it not, brother?" Edward asked. Both he and Stephane were bachelors and were the last of the Eskalumbuyes, but they were hardly seen as eligible. Stephane was too busy with keeping the peace in his country, while Edward was a revolutionary, and no one really liked revolutionaries.

"Look, you can still get out of Al Jawal if you want to," Stephane said. "The army doesn't move into Al Jawal until the day after tomorrow. Surely that's more than enough time for you to evacuate."

"You underestimate my capabilities, Stephane," Edward said with a yellow-toothed grin. "By the next dawn, your army will find no trace of me here."

"Just make sure you don't hide in your usual places," Stephane advised his younger brother. "The army's already in Javier, Sarabia, and Cimarron. If you go to one of those places, they will root you out like a goat roots out weeds. You'll have to look for a new place to hide in, and fast."

"I'll keep that in mind, Oyekanmi," Edward said. Stephane gave his younger brother one last look before he turned around and left.

"I'm sorry that I got you into this mess," Ellen Quest said to Elizabeth Glenn as the former watched the latter swing from where she had been chained to the ceiling. "If I hadn't volunteered you for this mission, you wouldn't be hanging from the roof while you watch me bleed from my head."

"It's all right, Ellie," Lizzie said. "I would've volunteered anyway, even without your assistance."

"God, I wonder if the satellites are back up again," Ellie muttered, more to herself than to anyone else. "I could really use some rescuing right now."

"Oh, so just you needs rescuing?" Lizzie asked with a hint of sarcasm. "What about poor little me? WHo's going to rescue me?"

"Eh, they can come back for you later," Ellie quipped.

"You are a right bitch, aren't you?" Lizzie said, but there was a hint of a smile on her lips.

"I work hard on it, honey."

Two men walked past their makeshift "cell", a thin rebel and a big, musclebound guy. They walked past the door of their cell too quickly for Ellie to get a good look at the big guy's face, but she saw enough for the frown of recognition to cross her face. "What is it, Ellie?" Lizzie asked her. "I know that look, Ellie. What's wrong?"

"I might be losing a little bit too much blood," Ellie muttered, "but I just thought I saw General Eskalumbuye here."

"Well, of course you're gonna see Eskalumbuye here," Lizzie said back. "This is his home base, yeah?"

"No, not Eskalumbuye the rebel," Eliie said. "I mean Colonel General Eskalumbuye of the Gharbambiyan Army."

"What's he doing here, then? I know that they're brothers and all, but isn't he against the rebellion in the first place? Didn't he ask Ed Eskalumbuye to throw down his arms and surrender? Or is this some kind of secret private mission to negotiate our release and Arby's?"

"Who knows, Lizzie? But it looks like whatever they talked about, it came to nothing. General Eskalumbuye don't look too pleased with himself."

"If Denny can track us down once again," Lizzie asked, "how long before they can get to us?"

"Deffo not tonight," Ellie replied. "Gerry and the others are gonna have to recuperate some, and they're probs gonna have to get a new chopper from somewhere. Sometime tomorrow or day after tomorrow, I hope."

"I hope so, Ellie. I hope so too."

by **The united states of Saints** » Fri May 06, 2016 8:43 am

Paladins exact revenge against The Anacondas in rematch 20-17, offense comes alive in the second half!

Aprilian Times -- In this exciting rematch between The Paladins and The Anacondas, The Paladins manged to edge out and win 20-17 against the Anacondas. However in the first half of this game it was not going well for the offense only scoring 3 points in the first half. The defense allowed 10 points in the first half goving The Anacondas the lead. In the second half something woke up the offense because they scored 10 points in the third quarter and another touchdown in the fourth. The Anacondas scored a touchdown in the middle of the third quarter but that would be it for them as the Paladins defense stepped up to keep them from scoring again.

Critics had doubted that The Paladins would be able to pull this off on defense alone. It looked like they were right in the first half when The Anacondas were winning 10-3. The Anacondas scored a touchdown in the first quarter on a pass from Steve Moors to Leo Fall from The Paladins' 37 yard line. Leo Fall beat Dominick Vega on a dig route and managed to escape running all the way to the end zone. Then later in the second The Anacondas scored a field goal from 32 yards out by Ron Porter. The Paladins only manged to get to the 33 yard line of The Anacondas' side of the field and scored on a 38 yard field by Louis Nakamura. In the second half though critics were silent as The Paladins scored on their first drive with a Miguel Black 65 yard run for a touchdown. Then the Anacondas took possession and also scored with a Toby Sexton 8 yard touchdown run. Putting the score at 17-10. The Paldins managed to score again with a 35 yard field goal at the end of the third quarter by Louis Nakamura. In the middle of the fourth Matt Whelan threw a 21 yard pass to TE Buddy Kyle. This gave them their first lead of the game 20-17. The Ancondas got two more chances to score but the Paladins defense held up.

Matt Whelan went 23-34 for 197 yards, a touchdown, and an interception. He was sacked twice both times being in the first half. Miguel Black had a great day today rushing for 141 yards on 20 carries, a touchdown, and unfortunately a fumble. Louis Nakamura scored two field goals. TE Buddy Kyle caught a TD pass from Matt Whelan and was targeted a total of 6 times catching 5 of them. For The Anacondas, Steve Moors went 28-36 passing for 224 yards, a touchdown, and 2 interceptions. He was sacked 3 times, two of them being in the second half. Toby Sexton rushed for 65 yards on 18 carries, and a touchdown, he did not fumble the ball.

The Paladins Defense were great throughout the whole game but the secondary struggled against one of the better Quarterbacks in this tournament. They managed to intercept 2 balls from him late game however, and deflected only 1 pass. The Front line though were great they managed to give up a touchdown but throughout the game they kept their team in a small enough gap to be able to comeback and at the end of the game they sealed the deal by stopping a 4th & 2 down attempt for a first. The Anacondas defense were also doing well but ended up disappointing their team in the second half allowing the Paladins offense to score on them for a comeback win.

Around Group A The Regulars defeated United States of Devonta 10-0. Shytysle beat Mareut 17-6. With that loss Mareut is officially knocked out of contention for a playoff berth. Here is a look at the leader board for Group A:

Group A
The united states of Saints 20–17 Frenline Delpha
United States of Devonta 0–10 Allamunic States
Shytysle 17–6 Mareut

# Group A                      Pld    W   L    GF   GA   GD 
1 The united states of Saints    6    5   1    85   74  +11
2 Allamunic States               6    5   1    96   26  +70
3 Frenline Delpha                6    4   2   123   75  +48
4 Shytysle                       6    3   3   106  109   −3
5 United States of Devonta       6    1   5    42   96  −54
6 Mareut                         6    0   6    26   98  −72

With The Paladins beating the Anacondas. They take the first place spot because of their head to head matchup win against the Regulars. The next game for the Paladins is a rematch against Shytysle, a team with a high scoring offense but the worst defense in Group A. Will this game go like last time with Shytysle's offense failing to score much against The Paladins defense? Will The Paladins offense score more than last time? Or will Shytysle defeat the Paladins?

In the Locker room after the game:

"How does it taste fellas?" Asked Coach Agresta, "How does revenge taste? Does it taste good? Is it sweet like honey? I'll tell ya this, I hate the taste of honey. I'm not satisfied with it so I guess I'm not satisfied with the win. Although I'll say I'm proud of my offense for finally showing up in the Second half leading us to victory while the Defense kept them in range. I would like to thank Coach Choppin for switching up some plays and fine-tuning others so we could catch them off guard."

"No Problem Coach. I'm the Offensive Coordinator its what I do" Responded Bailey.

"Now this next match against Shytysle can be a bit tricky. Sure we killed them last time but they want to pay us back just like we did to Frenline Delpha. So be careful, don't let your guard down, don't underestimate them or else the enemy will get you. That's all I have to say for now. Now get your butts home and if you're sore soak in Epsom salts for about 20 minutes. I need you guys for this whole tournament. Dismissed!"

by **Schottia** » Fri May 06, 2016 9:49 am

What a relief that one was. A tight yet solid victory over HUElavia in the reverse fixture had finally placed Schottia in a strong position within Group F. The final outcome wasn't decided by any stretch of the imagination, but at least they were right back in the mix. For everyone in Schottia, and all of the players and coaches involved with the team, there was a sense that they had at last gotten their spluttering title defence back on track. For all of them the relief was palpable, like some warm fuzzy balloon rising up inside. Everyone, that is, everyone except for Stephen McAlister.

Stephen checked his watch. The match would be over by now, thank god. He opened the tab on his laptop and checked the SBC sport website. He didn't so much as check the result, but instead he skimmed the match report nervously, as if he was about to slam the laptop closed at the first sign of danger. Reaching the bottom of the report he sat back in a sense of utter relief. He closed his laptop and breathed out a long shaky breath.

He was never sure how much more of this his little heart could take on nights like these. For a while he had tried watching some of his partner Gabriella’s matches on the TV, even if he found the matches themselves too busy. Even the armchair support had started to dwindle however, and after watching her go toe-to-toe with a couple of nasty looking enemy crushers from Gregoryisgodistan, this had stopped altogether. It wasn't so much that Stephen was a pacifist (although he most certainly was that too), it was rather that the sight of any violence whatsoever gave him crippling vertigo. It was both a physical and mental aversion to his partner's sport which kept him firmly away, no matter how bad he felt for being unsupportive.

This was now his ritual: He would check the match start time. Work out roughly when the game should be finished. Then scroll through the match report and check for any serious injuries. Minor bumps and scrapes he could handle, he just tried to look away; and any not involving her being stretchered off was better out of sight and out of mind. He didn't even bother taking a note of anything else - not even the score to be honest. Stephen didn't like sport of any description, most certainly not mindless ball games, most most certainly not contact sports, and most most most most certainly not ones which rewarded masculine bravado (something which he was utterly devoid of).

Stephen knew all this, and so did Gabi. They had an (semi) unspoken agreement where she would leave all sports related chat at the door, and he would not quote injury statistics at her constantly. Essentially, the only way their relationship worked was by both of them pretending that Gabi wasn't a gridiron player. The problem with this now, was the fact that the periods in between, were getting longer and longer. Before there were merely the matches, and training sessions - and of course the annual World Bowl tournament. Now however, there were televisions appearances, meetings with agents, radio interviews, and photography sessions, all these people wanting to get a piece of Schottia's new sporting golden girl.

The whole thing was making Stephen grumpier and grumpier; as were the constant interruptions to dinner, drinks, and even walking down the street, as she would have to deal with constant requests for autographs. He knew that everything combined was putting a strain of their relationship's fragile balance, but what could he do? Had he bothered in fact to follow her career in anyway, he would have noticed that it was having an impact on her performances as well.

The whole thing couldn't continue to last like this forever. It would have been obvious to anyone that something had to give. The only question was, would it be Gabi's sports career or her relationship.

by **Frenline Delpha** » Fri May 06, 2016 12:45 pm

Where do you go in Chicago in case of a tornado? Solider Field. They never have any touchdowns there. JK.

Your three words today are white, wine, and water.

Group E
Sarejo 13–3 Caball
Vilemyr 0–7 The Fair Republic
San Llera 44–14 Drawkland

Group E                        Pld   W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 San Llera                     7    6   1   163   65  +98
2 Drawkland                     7    6   1    99   70  +29
3 The Fair Republic             7    4   3    87   56  +31
4 Sarejo                        7    4   3   102   40  +62
5 Vilemyr                       7    1   6    57  137  −80
6 Caball                        7    0   7    20  160 −140

Group F
HUElavia 30–20 The Republic of Arkan
Schottia 23–7 Rennidan
Kaboomlandia 20–0 Vrai

Group F                        Pld   W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Schottia                      7    6   1   131   56  +75
2 Kaboomlandia                  7    6   1   172   58 +114
3 HUElavia                      7    4   3    82  108  −26
4 Rennidan                      7    3   4    62   70   −8
5 The Republic of Arkan         7    2   5    59  115  −56
6 Vrai                          7    0   7    13  112  −99

Group G
Nassau-Hessen 7–21 Abaja
The Unified Isles 0–17 Banija
Taeshan 20–17 Milaris

Group G                        Pld   W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Banija                        7    6   1    84   23  +61
2 Taeshan                       7    5   2   103   47  +56
3 Abaja                         7    5   2   117   80  +37
4 Nassau-Hessen                 7    4   3    77   68   +9
5 Milaris                       7    1   6    63  109  −46
6 The Unified Isles             7    0   7    20  137 −117

Group H
Zacistania 0–30 Royal Kingdom of Quebec
Cosumar 33–13 Halleconia
Mccompany 6–16 Chromatika

Group H                        Pld   W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Chromatika                    7    7   0   142   73  +69
2 Cosumar                       7    6   1   151   69  +82
3 Royal Kingdom of Quebec       7    4   3   131   64  +67
4 Halleconia                    7    2   5    84  144  −60
5 Zacistania                    7    1   6    67  169 −102
6 Mccompany                     7    1   6    36   92  −56

by **Abaja** » Fri May 06, 2016 4:39 pm

World Bowl XXIX

Abaja heating up, win 3 straight

-By Amina Ogwu and Vincent Megwaa

Nassau-Hessen 7 - 21 Abaja

The Abaja Lions have yet again pull off a victory as the playoffs get closer and closer. "Very good! Now we have a much better chance of playoff contention! However, this is not yet over. We have three more games to play, and we MUST take them very seriously. We can't get broken down again by Taeshan like we did the last time we played them. We still have two very difficult teams to defeat. Back to work!" Says head coach Josi Tueyuté. Nassau-Hessen had ball in the first quarter. On their first play, they gained 14 yards on a bullet pass. Then their RB ran for 6, then 2. Their QB threw an incomplete pass, resulting in s punt. Abaja began their drive with a 11 yard run by Vincent Oleamu (HB), then he got tackled for a loss of 1. Desna Osopno (QB) threw to Zair Macosa (WR/PR) for 14, then to Bobby Odendé (WR) for 25 yards. They were at the Nassau-Hessen 18 yard line. Vincent Oleamu (HB) ran for 4 yards and then Bobby Odendé (WR) caught a 14 yard touchdown pass. 7-0 Abaja. Nassau-Hessen went on a 33 yard drive before the drive was quickly stopped after 2 incomplete passes and a sack by Floki Jensa (DE) for a loss of 6. They punted back to Abaja. Desna Osopno (QB) got sacked on the first play but then passed to Zair Macosa (WR/PR) for 12 yards and Moqui Medenma (TE) for 10 yards. Vincent Oleamu (HB) ran for 7 yards. Abaja's drive was quickly stopped. They went for a 38 yard field goal, but the kicker missed it. The second quarter started, Nassau-Hessen had the ball. Their HB ran for 15 yards, then the QB passed to his WR for a 53 yard touchdown. It was now tied 7-7. Abaja couldn't respond, going on a three-and-out. They punted to Nassau-Hessen. The QB threw a 19 yard pass, then threw an interception. Guani Hensa (SS) was able to make the play. Abaja had the ball at the Nassau-Hessen 45 yard line, but could ony get 7 yards the entire drive (12 yard pass from Desna Osopno (DE) to Mohammadu Shepada (TE) then got sacked for loss of 8, 3 yard gain by Victor Oleamu (HB) then an incomplete pass) 3 minutes left in the second quarter, both teams punted to each other again, then halftime came.

Halftime, Abaja 7 - 7 Nassau-Hessen. Remember last game against Milaris where the Lions' defense stepped it up in the second half, well this game it was the opposite. Abaja got off to a red hot start, after a pass from Desna Osopno (QB) to Bobby Odendé (WR) for 37 yards, then Malik Mafausa (RB) ran for an extra 12, then 5. Desna Osopno (QB) scrambled for 11 more yards. They were at the Nassau-Hessen 8 yard line. That's when Zair Macosa (WR/PR) caught a diving touchdown pass from Desna Osopno (QB). Abaja now lead 14-7. When Nassau-Hessen got the ball back, they went on a 44 yard drive until they punted the ball back. 4 minutes left in the third, Abaja is unable to get much yards, they punt the ball back. Nassau-Hessen QB threw a pass to his WR, but the WR got stripped of the ball by Henry Turusi (CB) and Abaja recovered the fumble. Nassau-Hessen fans seemed to be very upset with that play. Abaja was on their own 42 yard line. Malik Mafausa (RB) ran for 40 yards before being knocked out of bounds. Bobby Odendé, who lost his CB caught a 18 yard touchdown pass from Desna Osopno (QB). The fourth quarter soon started, and boy was it boring. Only one time were either of the teams able to get out of their own territory (Abaja). However, Nikola Juvaswo (DE) was able to get a sack on the Nassau-Hessen QB. Anything after that was just punt, punt, punt, punt... 2 minutes left in the fourth quarter, Nassau-Hessen QB throws a deep pass on 4th and 8, and it LOOKED like it was intercepted by Henry Turusi (CB), but the referees reviwed the play and it was ruled incomplete. Abaja kneeled the ball 3 times, then there was 4th and 14 for them, but still 24 seconds left. The Nassau-Hessen QB threw a deep pass to his WR, who gained 51 yards. He tried again with 13 seconds left, but it was incomplete. Abaja seals the victory.

by **Drawkland** » Fri May 06, 2016 5:20 pm

GRID CORPS DROPS TO SECOND AFTER SAN LLERA LOSS
Written By: Justin Indi and Corbin Louis

RECENT RESULTS
FROM GROUP E:
Vilemyr 24–7 Caball
Sarejo 3–7 San Llera
The Fair Republic 0–6 Drawkland
Caball 0–20 Drawkland
The Fair Republic 8–10 San Llera
Sarejo 31–0 Vilemyr
Sarejo 13–3 Caball
Vilemyr 0–7 The Fair Republic
San Llera 44–14 Drawkland
Group E                        Pld   W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 San Llera                     7    6   1   163   65  +98
2 Drawkland                     7    6   1    99   70  +29
3 The Fair Republic             7    4   3    87   56  +31
4 Sarejo                        7    4   3   102   40  +62
5 Vilemyr                       7    1   6    57  137  −80
6 Caball                        7    0   7    20  160 −140
*Eliminated from playoff contention

REVIEW
Another 3 games have gone by for Drawkland and the Grid Corps, and it seems to be the same story. While last game was a huge loss to San Llera on home turf, Group E hasn't gotten any tighter, really, at least as far as knocking teams out of playoff contention. Vilemyr and Caball, as expected, have lost too many games to be in contention for the playoff spots (Vilemyr with one win, unshockingly over Caball, and Caball with no wins), so they're basically dead in the water. The Fair Republic and Sarejo are vying for the third place spot, while Drawkland and San Llera are now in a contest for who gets the better playoff seeding. The Grid Corps, with only one loss, is looking to keep its winning record intact and impressive, in order to be ready for the competition coming up in the playoffs. Without further ado, let's see how the previous matchups have gone.

vs THE FAIR REPUBLIC
In the final matchup of the first leg of group play, Drawkland finally had the opportunity to meet The Fair Republic, at home in Metro Arena. It was a low-scoring game, but Drawkland still came out ahead. After no scoring whatsoever in the first half, the Grid Corps came back after halftime with a massive drive to get a touchdown on the board. A failed PAT brought down a lot of pressure on the Grid Corps, as a simple touchdown+extra point from The Fair Republic would bring Drawkland down hard, and possibly even bring enough backwards momentum to drop them out of playoff contention. Fortunately, the crowd stayed true and supportive, and the National Pep Band played through the shell with ferocity during key points, which several fans and journalists swear led to the eventually full dismantling of the Fair defense. Once the third quarter ended, Drawkland managed to keep The Fair Republic from even passing into Drawkian territory past the 50, keeping the game firmly in their favor, even though they couldn't score a field goal for the life of them.

vs CABALL
After a break in competition, Drawkland came back in the second leg, starting off at home against group cellar-dwellers Caball. They'd actually put up a fight in the first match, but Drawkland eventually edged out a 10-7 win. This match was very different, however. Drawkland started off to defer, kicking the ball off to Caball, and sacking their quarterback on second down. With a few well-placed passes and a run by Bennett Morgan, the Grid Corps had a touchdown, with a successful PAT to put them firmly ahead in the game. The defense effectively shut down Caball whenever they got close, and their kicker was much too garbage to make the kicks from past the 30-yard line. A 42-yard field goal by Matthew Watts in the middle of the second quarter brought the score to 0-10. Another field goal in the third quarter kept Drawkland firmly in control, and once a touchdown from a breakthrough pass to Daniel Madison came in the fourth quarter, the whole Caball team was hoping they'd see a white light at the end of the tunnel to take them away from the beatdown. The Grid Corps certainly had a good time with their 0-20 win over Caball.

vs SAN LLERA
All the wine that was spilled the previous match after defeating Caball would not make a return appearance after the game against San Llera on Drawkland's turf. Over the course of the game, Drawkland managed to score 2 TD's, but that's about it. San Llera, on the other hand, was not discouraged by the scoring nor were they discouraged by their previous loss. Not only did they score 6 TD's with perfect PATs, they managed to get Drawkland down on a SAFETY of all things. Even worse, Dak Waterman was hit hard by a sack 4 minutes into the 3rd, and Trace Hayes had to take his place.

San Llera	7	7	14	16	44
Drawkland	7	7	0	0	14

Even at home, even with the crowd, even with momentum from their previously undefeated streak, once San Llera broke away after halftime, it was impossible for the Grid Corps to stay with it. The straw that broke the camel's back was undoubtedly the safety late in the 4th quarter. Drawkland had just picked up the ball after another San Lleran touchdown, but Daniel Madison, refusing a touchback, only got to the 15 yard line before going down. After a run that lost yardage, and a sack on subbed-in GB Hayes, the Grid Corps was down on their own 7, and another key sack by the Swagfish defense, and they lost the drive to a safety. Dak Waterman was put back in after Hayes' repeated failures, but Waterman simply could not recover, both from his injury, and from the massive 30-point deficit.

PREDICTIONS
Next on the list for Drawkland is the team of Vilemyr, who has only one win, against the still-winless Caball. Drawkland demolished them 13-33 on home turf in the first leg, and the coaching administration hopes that an equally decisive victory will be in order for this match, even being away in Vilemyr. The score is estimated to be around 17-6, Drawkland favor.
As far as the actual group goes, it's obvious that Caball and Vilemyr have no chance and will be fighting to stay out of last place, although it's expected that Caball is in 6th and there to stay. The Fair Republic and Sarejo are tied for 3rd, broken only by The Fair Republic's victory over Sarejo earlier (7-21). However, the next match for those two is coming up next as well, and if Sarejo manages a victory with a more than 14-point margin, they very well might break into the 3rd place spot, although it may be slightly worthless. As far as the playoff seedings of the top 2 go, it all comes down to wins. With both San Llera/Drawkland matches closed out, the only thing deciding placing is wins in the last 3 games. San Llera is expected to win all of its games, but so is Drawkland. Barring any upsets, the placements will stay the same as they are now. The only way for the situation to change is if either nation goes winless for the rest of the group stage, and if Sarejo or The Fair Republic go undefeated. With Drawkland's only loss being their most recent result, we hope that this won't snowball into a losing streak to punt Drawkland out of its first chance at an international playoff, and likewise, glory on such a stage. But, if all goes as projected, it's likely that Drawkland will have a decent 2nd seeding for the tournament, playing either Cosumar or Chromatika (probably the latter, barring upsets) from Group H to start off the tournament.

Good luck to the Grid Corps!

by **Drawkland** » Fri May 06, 2016 6:06 pm

Cutoff! Tensions heating as key matches are being played in most groups. The atmosphere is electric.

Your Words: Blackmail, Bag, Riot. Should be easy.

Group A
Shytysle 14–20 The united states of Saints
Mareut 14–28 United States of Devonta
Allamunic States 15–3 Frenline Delpha

# Group A                      Pld    W   L    GF   GA   GD 
1 The united states of Saints    7    6   1   105   88  +17
2 Allamunic States               7    6   1   111   29  +82
3 Frenline Delpha                7    4   3   126   90  +36
4 Shytysle                       7    3   4   120  129   −9
5 United States of Devonta       7    2   5    70  110  −40
6 Mareut                         7    0   7    40  126  −86

Group B
Falatulu 10–19 Anglatia
Holy Philippine Empire 20–12 The Orion Islands
Ko-oren 13–14 Ethane

# Group B                      Pld    W   L    GF   GA   GD
1 Anglatia                       7    7   0   110   32  +78
2 Ko-oren                        7    4   3   114   54  +60
3 Falatulu                       7    4   3    81   55  +26
4 Ethane                         7    4   3    61   57   +4
5 The Orion Islands              7    1   6    60  137  −77
6 Holy Philippine Empire         7    1   6    37  128  −91

Group C
Equestrian States 17–3 Texasa
Barunia 17–24 San Jose Guayabal
West Phoencia 0–0 Cuatro (3–0 OT)

# Group C                      Pld    W   L    GF   GA   GD
1 Equestrian States              7    7   0   102   12  +90
2 San Jose Guayabal              7    5   2    87  103  −16
3 Barunia                        7    3   4    99   60  +39
4 West Phoencia                  7    3   4    46   78  −32
5 Texasa                         7    2   5    43   64  −21
6 Cuatro                         7    1   6    29   89  −60

Group D
Leaf Kingdom 10–23 The Nation of Downination
Abanhfleft 6–13 United Vietussia
The Sword Bloke 10–7 Gregoryisgodistan

# Group D                      Pld    W   L    GF   GA   GD
1 Gregoryisgodistan              7    6   1    99   23  +76
2 Abanhfleft                     7    5   2   123   81  +42
3 United Vietussia               7    4   3    96   95   +1
4 The Sword Bloke                7    4   3    97   70  +27
5 The Nation of Downination      7    2   5    73  102  −29
6 Leaf Kingdom                   7    0   7    44  161 −117

by **Anglatia** » Fri May 06, 2016 6:58 pm

Sorry for another dialogue only part! My posts will return to normal for the knockout rounds when I'm back home.
ETID - Part Six

"I'm thinking we shouldn't go through with the plan. We're seven and oh and I don't want to mess up our chances for the next round. And we haven't even clinched yet."

"We will. Soon. But I already have Ciar and Konu in on this. We can't go back, I already paid them. It took most of my bonus for winning the games that we did, too. Besides... Ciar is the most talented back I've ever seen. He'll do just fine."

"I just don't feel comfortable screwing over anyone's livelihood, especially not a teammate. I don't want to punish my teammates for not listening to your advice. And think of how it will affect-"

"Chill. I promise you that this will work out. I bet my life on it, honest. You do realize that I would be ruining my best friend's life if we botch this, right?"

"I know... That's why I'm worried. I can't live with myself if I'm the one who messes everything up."

"Yeah? Maybe if we fail, we can ditch our passports and run away to Batavia. I know people down there who can set us up with new papers..."

"You'd do that?"

"Sure. I really just want to get my chip and retire young, but not necessarily in that order. I love playing the villain, but sometimes the way that others treat me because of it takes a toll on me. And I'm tired of walking in a long shadow that I'm never going to eclipse. Maybe if I go on hiatus and come back, things will be better."

"Didn't you get a chip at IU?"

"Nope. We got blown the hell out by Trista Prust, had a blocked kick returned for a touchdown in the national semis against Tech, we lost to West when they had the greatest season ever, and as a senior, we lost to Tech in the national championship after I fumbled a snap for a touchdown on a trick play."

"But I thought I remembered you winning one with the Surge? Didn't you end their QBs career?"

"Maybe. But does anyone care about the AGL? I wanted to win one in Batavia because I grew up there, or with the national team."

"So you're alright with retiring young... How do you know that I am?"

"You don't have a choice. I already shelled out my cash and I can't just ask for it back... Don't worry. I bet my life on this working perfectly."

by **Chromatika** » Fri May 06, 2016 7:52 pm

The Iron Legion, Part 6/7

David McDonald was one happy camper after the latest win of The Iron Legion, over McCompany, 16-6. He had been the workhorse back again, carrying twenty-five times for one hundred eighty-four yards and the game's only touchdown. The defense was on point as usual, and it seemed like everything was clicking together for The Iron Legion. Diaz, Hernandez, and Baas had all sacked the quarterback two times apiece; they had forced three turnovers, controlled the ball, and only conceded two field goals, one of them on a special teams mishap and the other on a deep ball down the middle.

This after another blockbuster win over The Royal Kingdom of Quebec on the road, 27-20, off of an interception return for touchdown by Baas. Eric Baas was definitely showing what kind of a playmaker he was, going here, there, everywhere, generating turnovers, converting them into scores. It was a beautiful sight for The Iron Legion; Mercado had not thrown a single interception through the Group Stage, the offense was running the spread or being willing to hand McDonald the ball, and Randy Head had yet to miss a field goal.

For a team running on all cylinders, Cosumar stands in the way of perhaps an undefeated group stage in this tournament. Of course, they had defeated Cosumar narrowly the first time around, only by two points; if The Iron Legion lost, Cosumar would probably have the Head-to-head advantage by virtue of Points Differential. It was possible for Cosumar to lose to Quebec, of course, but The Iron Legion would rather not worry about that. If they won the next game, they'd probably cruise to wins over Halleconia and Zacistania; that would set them up for a good spot in the Round of Sixteen of this World Bowl.

McDonald looked back at his life before gridiron professionally started in Chromatik about a year and a half back. He had played in the semi-pro leagues after graduating from CCCU, and kept his skills sharp, hoping that one day he'd be able to ply his trade. Then, the League had been formed, and he got the call from the Cyan. Sure, they'd lost to the Lynx in the first ever Chromatik Bowl, but there was always next season, and right now, it was the Lynx players carrying as much of the load as he was. They were one team for now, and it was working wonders, way better than anyone had ever hoped.

No matter how this ended, it was an experience of a lifetime. And he was going to treasure every moment of it, down to the last millisecond.

works? · by **Abanhfleft** » Sat May 07, 2016 2:36 am

Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five Part Six Part Seven Part Eight Part Nine Part Ten Part Eleven Part Twelve Part Thirteen Part Fourteen Part Fifteen Part Sixteen Part Seventeen Part Eighteen

No Place For Heroes, Part Nineteen

Chah Rajawhm National Airport
Chah Rajawhm, Gharbambiyah

The team had been working very hard to go through the ionization interference from the sandstorm so that they could finally track down their missing compatriots, Ellie and Lizzie. Dennis Messi had tried all of the tricks up his sleeve to get through the interference, but Mother Nature was a tougher enemy than any other hacker that he had ever met, and she knew a lot more tricks than Denny could ever hope to imagine in his entire lifetime.

And that wasn't the only thing weighing down on their minds. President Cabulovowino of Gharbambiyah had announced a joint Gharbambiyan-World Assembly task force will enter Al Jawal in an attempt to retake it from the so-called Emirate of Al Jawal. Cabulovowino himself will lead the attack, having been a field marshal of the army before he overthrew Abdullah Sulaiman and his transitional government. Cabulovowino had given the Emirate's leader, Edward Eskalumbuye, more than enough time to surrender and lay down his arms, but Eskalumbuye had not responded to the offers of surrender themselves, instead kidnapping the son of the World Assembly general, Rowan Balladur of the Fleftic Army, to make the point that he will never surrender. Seeing that his offer of mercy had been rejected, Cabulovowino will now show no mercy on any of Eskalumbuye's militias, whether they fight against him or come out to surrender. The time to give up had long passed, he claimed.

Ellie and Lizzie were somewhere in Al Jawal, most probably in the clutches of Eskalumbuye's militias. There were two problems attached to this: one, they didn't know if the militia was treating Ellie and Lizzie nicely or if they were savage and had already worked their wicked ways on the women. And if that wasn't concerning enough, what would happen to them if they got caught in the inevitable fight between the task force and the militia? Both the Gharbambiyans and the WA peacekeepers had been informed of Ellie and Lizzie's disappearance and likely capture by the militia, but in the heat of battle, was there enough time to distinguish between friend and foe?

The task force had launched a couple of drones from Chah Rajawhm National Airport as it was the closest airport to Al Jawal. The task force's headquarters were located in the other hangars right next to the one provided by the Gharbambiyan government to the RBI agents, but Gerry and his unit hadn't joined them yet. "Still nothing on Ellie and Lizzie's trackers?" Gerry asked Denny.

"Unfortunately not, boss man," Denny replied as he ran a hand over his face. "They weren't kidding when they said that that sandstorm yesterday was the biggest one in recent history. I mean, it's still affecting our satellites and comms! The only reason that the WA can launch drones now is because they've got the drones on local control, and their hardware is the latest military-spec ones hardened for intense ion storms."

"I wonder how much longer we'll have to wait before we get civvie versions of that?" Gerry asked rhetorically.

"Not soon enough, certainly." Denny replied.

"How are the drones looking, though?" Gerry asked to change the subject.

"They're all running hot, straight and normal," Denny said, checking the monitors in front of him. "All we can do is watch, though; if I try to take control of one of those drones, we could be accused of treason."

"How far away are they from Al Jawal?"

"Just about a quarter of an hour now."

Ellen Quest woke up to find herself chained to the back of a pickup truck.

She couldn't remember how exactly she got there, but she did know that she was still in the clutches of Edward Eskalumbuye and his militias. She tried to reach up for the bandage around her head and saw that her right hand had been handcuffed to the left hand of Elizabeth Glenn, who was still either knocked out or asleep to Ellie's left.

Ellie looked up from where she had been lying down and saw that the pickup truck in which she and Lizzie were in right now was bringing up the tail of a small convoy of ragtag vehicles making their way down what looked to be open desert. Maybe the militia was taking them away to another place so that they wouldn't lose all of their hostages?

"Uh, what happened?" Lizzie said as she finally stirred awake. She saw where she was and what was going on asked, "Uh, yeah, what's happening?"

"No idea," Ellie replied. "One moment, we were in our cell, and the next minute we're both here!"

"Yeah. Where are they taking us?"

"I don't know too," Ellie said, "but it looks like they're splitting up their hostages so they don't lose all of us in one raid."

"Well, this sucks," Lizzie muttered.

"Tell me about it," Ellie said.

A low buzzing noise attracted Lizzie's attention. "What's that?"

"What's what?" Ellie asked back. She was trying to find a way to loosen the chains tying her down to the bed of the pickup.

"Seriously? You don't hear that?" Lizzie asked again.

"I can't hear anything 'cause you're talking, Liz! Now shut up 'cause I'm trying to find a way to get us out of here!"

"Sir, we've got a small convoy moving out of the city."

General Rowan Balladur leaned closer to the screen where the drone's video feed was being displayed. "Zoom in on the vehicles," he said.

"Yes, sir," the pilot of the drone said as he complied with Balladur's orders. There was a brief burst of static as the drone's cameras compensated for the zoom command given to them. Finally, the images cleared up. "Looks like a bunch of militia trying to run away from the army, if you ask me," the general said.

"Orders to engage?" the drone pilot asked.

"Get the Predator to that area and retask the Heron to wherever the Predator was supposed to be," Balladur ordered. "Once the Predator is over this convoy, you have permission to engage."

"Roger that, General," the drone pilot said. He and the pilot commanding the Predator drone called out their respective grid locations so that they knew where to go exactly, and once they had successfully exchanged grids, Balladur walked over to where the Predator's pilot was sitting. "Is the convoy within range?" he asked.

"Just a few more minutes, sir," the pilot replied. "The range isn't exactly optimal for the missiles."

"How long before it gets into range?"

"Thirty seconds, General."

"Hang on a minute, Denny," Gerry said as he leaned closer to the "resident combat hacker's" monitor. "Can you zoom in on that last truck in the convoy, enhance the image?"

"I can't tamper with the video feed; that could get us arrested," Denny said. "But I can take a still and enhance that." Denny did just that, and within a minute, he had the enhanced picture up on the second monitor beside his main screen.

"I can't tell much even from that," Gerry said.

"Sorry, boss man," Denny said. "This ain't like the movies where we can clear up every pixel in the world. That's as clear as we're gonna get."

"Never mind that," Gerry said, waving off Denny's apology. "But doesn't that look a little bit like Ellie and Lizzie lying there on the back of that pickup?"

"Can't say for certain, boss man. I mean, I'm exposed to computers almost all of the time, and that's ruined my fine vision, or at least that's what the doctor said."

"God, I'm a bit younger than you are, Denny, but even I can't trust myself now," Gerry said. "I mean, what if this is just my subconscious applying Ellie and Lizzie's looks on a bunch of blurry pixels?"

Suddenly, there was a shrill buzzing on one of the many laptops surrounding Denny's "terminal". "Hang on, that's the transdermal tracker finally going back online," he said as he rushed over to the laptop. "The ionization's finally dissipated enough for the signals to get through." Denny typed some commands on the laptop that transferred the screen currently on it to the second monitor of his mainframe computer.

"Okay, get Ellie and Lizzie's locations," Gerry ordered.

"Working on it, boss man, working on it," Denny said. He typed in another series of commands on the computer. Two red dots with Ellie and Lizzie's names beside them appeared overlaid on a map of Gharbambiyah. "They're somewhere to the east of Al Jawal, Gerry," Denny said. "Looks like they're moving or being moved."

"Bring up their coordinates," Gerry ordered. A few key clicks from Denny later, and a series of coordinates appeared on the screen underneath Ellie and Lizzie's names. Gerry looked at these coordinates, and then he looked back at the live feed and the coordinates of the drone. "Oh, my God, it is them," Gerry muttered.

"Keep an eye on those guys, will you, Liz?" Ellie said to Lizzie, nodding her head at the two militiamen in the cab of the pickup. "I think I know how we're going to get ourselves out."

"Okay, but you better make sure that that plan of yours works," Lizzie said. She then watched as Ellie used her right hand to reach into her trousers with Lizzie's left hand still cuffed to it. "Okay, now is not the time for this, Ellie! Don't go Fifty Shades of Grey on me while I'm still tied up beside you."

"Shut up, Liz, that's not why I'm doing this," Ellie muttered from her concentration. She finally came out with a round metallic object.

"What the heck is that?" Lizzie asked.

"My lucky coin," Ellie replied. "Remember that time we were in Brasilistan trying to bring down that cartel with the revolutionary new drug? I got sneaked a fast one when I went undercover, and were it not for this coin that somehow found its way into my knickers, I would've been date-raped. Now I keep it in there as my lucky charm against that kind of thing."

"Ew," Lizzie muttered. "I hope I'm not gonna have to touch that."

"Sorry, Lizzie, but you'll need it to get yourself out too."

"Of course I would. Damn it!"

Ellie took her lucky coin from her right hand to her left and used it on one of the screws bolting down the bed of the pickup truck to its chassis. She pushed the coin into the slot and began to turn it. At first, there was some difficulty involved, but then the screw finally began to move freely. Finally, the screw was loose, and it clattered onto the bed with a hollow clang. "One down," she muttered. Then she turned to Lizzie and said, "Your turn."

"All right," Lizzie muttered, and she took the coin and began unscrewing the screw on her side. But even though she was doing it with her right hand, she found it harder to do than she thought while watching Ellie do it.

"Put a little back into it," Ellie hissed.

"I'm trying, I'm trying," Lizzie hissed back.

"Down!" Ellie suddenly said. Lizzie saw the rebel in the passenger seat turn around to look behind him, and she ducked her head down and pretended to be still unconscious. Right at that moment, she heard another buzzing noise like the one she had heard earlier, but this one sounded a little bit harsher, a bit more threatening. She opened her eyes and saw, against the clear blue skies, a gray Predator drone flying over the convoy. Lizzie nudged Ellie and said, "I told you I wasn't just hearing things!" She pointed at the Predator to prove her point.

"Well, shite," Ellie muttered. "Get to work on that thing!" she told Ellie. "If that Predator's here, then the WA's not far off behind." And then another realization hit her. "Oh, God. It's going to blow up the convoy."

"What are we gonna do?" Lizzie asked. "Can't we just wave it off? Surely they know we've been captured?"

"I don't think they're going to be fussy with the particulars right now," Ellie said. "Don't dillydally! Get us out of here!"

"Targets confirmed, General. They're rebels."

"Thank you, Captain," General Balladur said. "Prepare to fire on my mark."

Lizzie had finally removed the screw on her side, and she and Ellie were now trying to push the bed off of the truck by putting their feet on the cab and pushing with their backs. It wasn't the easiest of things to do while lying down, and they nearly got discovered when the rebel guard turned back to look at either them or the drone flying overhead. When they were finally too far from the cab to use it as leverage, the girls used their combined weight to force the bed away.

"Open fire," General Balladur commanded.

"Stratos Twenty, launching Stingers," the Predator pilot called out. Four AIM-92 Stinger missiles, modified versions of the FIM-92 Stinger missile for use on aircraft and against aircraft or ground targets, dropped from the Predator's hardpoints and blasted their way towards the little convoy. Balladur watched the Stingers' flight in silence before he heard a commotion coming from outside the tactical center.

"Sir, no civilians or unauthorized personnel are allowed in this room!" one of the MPs said as he tried to block a man from entering the tactical center.

"I'm not a civilian! I'm an agent of the Republican Bureau of Investigation with information for General Balladur!" Gerry Anthony said to the MP.

"Let him in," Balladur ordered. The MP nodded his head and lowered his hand to let Gerry into the tactical center. "What is this information that you have, Mr. Anthony?"

"My agents are in that convoy!" Gerry shouted.

Balladur's mouth fell open in surprise. "Are you sure about that?" he asked.

"Of course I'm sure, General! Get your drones to lay off that convoy!"

"Sir, missiles have already been launched and are locked on," the pilot of the Predator said, more to Gerry than to Balladur.

"Oh, God," Balladur muttered as he and Gerry were rendered helpless to watch the events unfolding before them. The drone's cameras remained locked onto the convoy, and then there were four explosions as four missiles found their targets.

by **Ko-oren** » Sat May 07, 2016 3:06 am

Early Gridiron

Gridiron football is the favourite sport of millions in the Union, and millions and millions more follow the league even if their number one favourite sport is something else. Overall, Gridiron football is the second largest sport in the Union in revenue, and the biggest sport in average attendance per game. Thirty-two teams play 17 regular season games, with four rounds of playoffs, a game for players not in the playoffs, and between the regular season and the start of the playoffs, a week for games novelty games (Number 32 versus 31, for instance). And in the middle of the off-season, just before each team starts their preparation for the new season, there are some national team games (which are not played in a World Bowl year). Basically, it's massive. But it wasn't always like that.

In the early days, gridiron was called a bleak rip off of rugby union and league, which were well-established sports by the turn of the last century. Regional rugby competitions in both codes were set up by the 1910's in Ko-oren, Waratah, Fern, Protea, the Nine Sisters and more. Gridiron was played in the cities of Thaulandi, which first set up a gridiron league in 1935, contested by ten teams. At this time, most of the modern rules were in place (forward passes legal from anywhere behind the line of scrimmage, the number of points for a scoring play, etc). The ten teams all have a successor team in the current league! In fact, the Lena Tsars have decided on a name in 1935 and have never changed it! The Novaya Pobeda team was initially called the Argonauts, but changed it to Kosmonauts following the first Thaulandian in space. At the time the team was founded, there wasn't even such a thing as a Kosmonaut! Between 1935 and 1954, every single team in the league won the league at least once. The Pereselenets Blues did so six times.

By this time, there were numerous leagues set up in Thaulandi with teams touching the level of the TFL. These teams begged to be included, and the TFL was expanded to two conferences of eight teams each: 16 teams total. This meant the TFL had a monopoly on all the good teams, keeping the level of the other leagues down. With the bigger league, more teams in more different places, the ultimate goal was to play in the TFL. From these 16 teams, 13 remain in the current Union of Ko-oren League (U-BOWL). The remaining three defaulted over the course of their history, and never won a championship either. In 1955, football became a way to earn a living for most players in the league, but not for all. About 50% could live off of a football salary at this point, but this increased to 95% in 1960. Only infrequently used backups didn't have great salaries yet, and they usually got by doing other jobs for the club, such as janitor work, assisting players in strength and conditioning, and even PR work.

Zakhozani teams
Zakhozan, a nation that exists as an enclave in Thaulandi, declared independence from Thaulandi in 1931. That's a very peaceful way of expressing it, as there was a war of independence that lasted for three years before it. Zakhozani teams have long wanted to be included in the TFL despite the war and the fact that they were in another, independent nation by then. Two teams made the cut over all this time, and they were forced to play all of their games as away games in Thaulandi for the first decade of their existence. The first two true home games for these teams are still attendance records for the TFL, the U-BOWL or any other Gridiron football league, with the Gravel Coast Waves attracting 120.000 and the Red Markets Navy (currently Red Markets Sailors) attracting 105.902. The GCW entered the league in 1960 and the Red Markets entered in 1962.

The sport was still nearly non-existant abroad, but several TFL games played in Ko-oren and the Nine Sisters changed that. The larger cities in these two nations often already had gridiron teams, but suffered from a lack of funding and better players immediately left for the TFL when possible. In 1974, the KFL, Ko-orenite Football League, had its inaugural season with the same six teams that still play in the U-BOWL. In 1977, four teams from the Nine Sisters made up the IXFL (IX meaning 9, and FL meaning football league).

Meanwhile, the TFL professionalised a lot. The Draft was introduced in 1962, rules around contracts were put in place between 1968 and 1971, and player safety was ensured during the 70's.

In 1983, the leagues decided to join forces. 13 Thaulandian teams, 2 Zakhozani teams, 6 Ko-orenite teams and 4 Nonosororitan teams made up the U-BOWL for 25 teams total. The scheduling was a mess in those days, but every team played 15 regular season games in the end. Some teams were hit disproportionally hard with streaks of away games, or far travels, but these hiccups were smoothed out as more and more teams joined the league. The Groenvoorde Greens joined in 1985. The Maruyama Rays, Weiyao Godspeed and Yalloodoola Leafs joined in 1990 as a huge southern Union expansion. The San Dionisio Guillotines were added in 1996, followed by the San Pedro Keys in 1998 as gridiron was viable in the Six Saints. Lastly, the Penstead Captains joined in 2005, as the 32nd and last team to join the league.

The Lena Tsars and Pereselenets Sparta are the only teams to win a championship in every decade, from the 30s onwards. However, they still haven't secured a championship in the 10's... On the other side, the Bonesteel Destroyers have been in the league since 1955, but haven't won a championship since.

by **Banija** » Sat May 07, 2016 11:11 am

The All-Banija Sports Magazine
The only nationwide publication that is all sports, all the time!

Halftime quarterback switch leads to 17 second half points to achieve 6th Banijan victory of the 29th World Bowl

Myles Debaba celebrates his 3rd quarter touchdown pass to tight end Christos Cosse

UNIFIED ISLES- The Banijan offense, led by quarterback Slawomir Kovach, had one of the worst 6 quarters of football that the World Bowl had ever seen. With the full game against Taeshan, and the first half on the road against group cellar dwellars Unified Isles, the offense had some pretty terrible numbers. In those 6 quarters of football, the offense had 8 turnovers. Slawomir Kovach, the quarterback, was responsible for 7 of them, since he had one fumble and 4 interceptions against Taeshan, and he followed that performance up by going away from home and throwing 2 interceptions in the 1st half against the winless Unified Isles. This, in addition to the Zivorad Dvorak fumble at the goal line, turned what should've been the easiest of victories for Banija into a dogfight, with the teams going into halftime tied at 0.

Then, the quarterback switch was made. Reported live by the TV announcers right at halftime, Myles Debaba jogged onto the field in the third quarter instead of Slawomir Kovach. And boy, was the change necessary. Myles Debaba led the Banijan offense to 17 second half points. Granted, he did have the one big play on the 77 yard touchdown pass to Vena Resnick in the 4th quarter, but he played well outside of that. He not only protected the ball, but he played proactively as well. He gave his team a chance to win, as was shown when he threaded the needle on his 13 yard touchdown pass to tight end Christos Cosse in the 3rd quarter which gave Banija their first lead of the game.

After the game, Ezekiel Daniachew was asked about the quarterback switch. "Ultimately, if you want to gout there and win football games, especially in a competition like this played at this high of a level, you need to have confident play at all positions, but especially at quarterback. Slawomir Kovach is a good quarterback, and is a very talented quarterback, but for whatever reason, he isn't playing with a lot of confidence. We need to work on that. But if he does not play with confidence, it is going to hurt us, and that has given Myles Debaba the opportunity to step up to the plate. He made a beautiful read on the long throw to Vena Resnick, and played an excellent game, also throwing a few other excellent passes, especially to Cosse."

He was asked about the two upcoming home games that loomed large for Banija, against Nassau-Hessen and Abaja respectively. "Nassau-Hessen has a lot of talent on their team. Even though we are ahead of them in the group standings, we must remember that we are playing a top 10 opponent. We need to be at our absolute best to beat Nassau-Hessen, because if we are not, then it is quite possible that we drop another home game. I'm not even going to talk about whatever follows that. If we get caught looking ahead, we'll lose this game, and as the Head Coach, if I am not 100% focused on defeating Nassau-Hessen, I guarantee you that we will lose. We played well the last time against Nassau-Hessen, and we're going to mix things up offensively against them, and try out some new things to make sure we stay one step ahead of our opponents, and we can defeat them at the Stadium of the Restoration."

When asked, of course, he would not say who would be Banija's starting quarterback for the Nassau-Hessen game, but he did say that, for now, the starting quarterback position is "Slawomir Kovach's to lose".

by **Kaboomlandia** » Sat May 07, 2016 12:23 pm

Phoenix lock down Vrai to stay with Schottia in Group F

In a crucial game, the Kaboomlandia Phoenix defeated unranked Vrai 20-0 to move to 6-1 along with Schottia, who beat the Rennidans as well. To conserve Ty =ler Martin for the Schottia game, Russell Jones got his first start of the tournament and got the job done with 15 of 19 throws completed for 112 yards and two touchdowns. While he wasn't wonderful, he didn't need to be, as Vrai had just 86 net yards total against a tough Kaboomlandian defense. In the first quarter, the came started off somewhat well. While the Phoenix started off well, the conversion didn't, as a rare miss by the snapper seethe ball way over the holder's hands before McCallum fell on it to stop the play. However, Vrai never got their act together, as they were intercepted three times and sacked five times by the all-present Phoenix defense. The team will play The Republic of Arkan today as they look to keep pace with Schottia.

by **Frenline Delpha** » Sat May 07, 2016 12:42 pm

This cut-off is (not) sponsored by Dan Bull. Check out his Bioshock Infinite Rap.

Your three words today are key, horoscope, and leg.

Group E
Caball 16–10 San Llera
Drawkland 22–16 Vilemyr
The Fair Republic 34–3 Sarejo

Group E                        Pld   W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Drawkland                     8    7   1   121   86  +35
2 San Llera                     8    6   2   173   81  +92
3 The Fair Republic             8    5   3   121   59  +62
4 Sarejo                        8    4   4   105   74  +31
5 Vilemyr                       8    1   7    73  159  −86
6 Caball                        8    1   7    36  170 −134

Group F
The Republic of Arkan 0–34 Kaboomlandia
Vrai 7–41 Schottia
Rennidan 27–0 HUElavia

Group F                        Pld   W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Schottia                      8    7   1   172   63 +109
2 Kaboomlandia                  8    7   1   206   58 +148
3 Rennidan                      8    4   4    89   70  +19
4 HUElavia                      8    4   4    82  135  −53
5 The Republic of Arkan         8    2   6    59  149  −90
6 Vrai                          8    0   8    20  153 −133

Group G
Abaja 7–3 Taeshan
Milaris 17–14 The Unified Isles
Banija 30–6 Nassau-Hessen

Group G                        Pld   W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Banija                        8    7   1   114   29  +85
2 Abaja                         8    6   2   124   83  +41
3 Taeshan                       8    5   3   106   54  +52
4 Nassau-Hessen                 8    4   4    83   98  −15
5 Milaris                       8    2   6    80  123  −43
6 The Unified Isles             8    0   8    34  154 −120

Group H
Royal Kingdom of Quebec 23–0 Mccompany
Chromatika 10–3 Cosumar
Halleconia 17–21 Zacistania

Group H                        Pld   W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Chromatika                    8    8   0   152   76  +76
2 Cosumar                       8    6   2   154   79  +75
3 Royal Kingdom of Quebec       8    5   3   154   64  +90
4 Halleconia                    8    2   6   101  165  −64
5 Zacistania                    8    2   6    88  186  −98
6 Mccompany                     8    1   7    36  115  −79

Clinched Number One Seed in Group
Clinched Advancement into Play-offs

by **San Llera** » Sat May 07, 2016 2:30 pm

After a tough loss to an inferior opponent, San Llera's football team did what any group of large and testosterone-full, but partially emasculated, men would do - giggle over each other's horoscopes. While they were in the locker rooms, in stitches over Antoni Basso's "passionate, fulfilling, and occasionally experimental" sex life, Xavier Pan was at the front conducting a press conference.

"No, I'm not happy about it," Pan stated, not really answering the reporter's question. "But the key to winning is not to dwell on mistakes but to learn from them, and that is what we will do.

"Beyond that, what are your thoughts about the offensive chants made by San Lleran fans in the fourth quarter?"

"I was particularly disappointed with offensive line. They are usually one of the strong points of our team, but today they were bullied. Granted, Xavier Llana's leg played into that, but it was inexcusable, the performance they had."

Another yellow notepad-wielding reporter attempted to ask Pan about the San Lleran fans, but failed once again, as the gruff head coach instead discussed at length the officiating mistakes made in the second half. Five to six deflected questions later, Pan concluded the press conference, and headed back to the locker rooms, only a paper-thin wall away from the mob of reporters. He was about to embark on is typical angry post-loss speech, but before he could, Josep Mariova blurted out and interrupted him.

"According to this, Octavius is being 'constantly aroused' this month by the 'titillating' Cecil." The team giggled like middle schoolers. Xavier Pan sighed, caught in a common pattern of not being able to control his team's emotions.

"You better win Thursday night."

by **Abaja** » Sat May 07, 2016 4:12 pm

World Bowl XXIX

Abaja defeats Taeshan 7-3 in rematch

-Vincent Megwaa & Matthew Teyare

Abaja 7 - 3 Taeshan

On May 1, Taeshan handed Abaja their first loss in the tournament 20-3. Today, Abaja has beaten #11 Ranked Taeshan and the Lions are now starting to prove themselves that they aren't just a regular unranked team. People are now starting to notice them more. "Though this game was low in score, we did a terrific job on defense! So many times the defense have stopped Taeshan from scoring! Brilliant work! Tomorrow we will face Banija. Lets hope for the best of that game. Keep it up!" Says head coach Josi Tueyuté. In the first quarter, Taeshan started off with the ball. The Taeshan HB ran for 8 yards, then the QB threw for another 16, then the QB got sacked by Nikola Juvaswo (DE). Their drive continued until they reached the Lion's 31 yard line. They went for a field goal, but missed. Abaja then started their drive. Desna Osopno (QB) threw to Mohammadu Shepada (TE) for 22 yards, then Vincent Oleamu (HB) ran for 11. Desna Osopno (QB) scrambled for 8 more yards. Their drive quickly stopped with 3 incomplete passes. They punted back to Taeshan, but they couldn't do anything with the ball ,they punted back to Abaja with 3 minutes left in the quarter. This time, Abaja managed to reach the Taeshan territory, but again failed to put up points. The second quarter was filled with punts. After Abaja punted to Taeshan, the Taeshan PR gave them good yardage, putting Taeshan on the Lions' 14 yard line. However, after a 4 yard run by the HB, the Taeshan QB passed to his TE, Henry Turusi (CB) tipped it and Lema Megusu (CB) got the interception off of the tip. Abaja went on a 28 yard drive, after a pass from Desna Osopno (QB) to Bobby Odendé for 22 yards, a sack, a pass to Mohammadu Shepada (TE) for 8 yards, and an incomplete pass. They punted back ton Taeshan with 50 seconds left. Taeshan made it to the Abaja 18 yard line after a 54 yard drive within 41 seconds. They made a field goal with 9 seconds left in the half. 3-0 Taeshan

At halftime, Abaja was losing 0-3. They would not tolerate another loss to the same team, but in the third quarter, the offense still couldn't get going. They punted back to Taeshan after their first few plays in the start of the third. Sola Mumu (LOLB) got a sack on the Taeshan QB. The Taeshan QB then threw a deep pass to his WR, but it was broken up by Henry Turusi (CB). Floki Jensa (DE) then sacked the QB. Taeshan was facing a 4th and 28 on their own 17 yard line. They punted to Abaja. Abaja this time seemed to be more focused. Desna Osopno (QB) did a hand-off to Malik Mafausa (RB) for 22 yards, and then he threw to Bobby Odendé (WR) for 15 yards. He threw to Odendé again, and Bobby Odendé caught a short pass, broke a tackle, then he was gone for a 42 yard touchdown. Abaja now leads 7-3. The rest of the third quarter was all punts. In the start of the fourth quarter, Taeshan had walked into a nightmare. The Lions' defense played so aggressive, they only gave up a total of 64 yards in the fourth! The Taeshan RB got tackled for a loss of 3, then Henry Turusi (CB) caught an interception. Abaja could not do anything with the ball. They punted back. Taeshan could not do anything with the ball, they punted back. Mohammadu Shepada (TE) caught a 18 yard pass from Desna Osopno (QB) and Malik Mafausa (RB) runs for 13. Desna Osopno scrambles for 6 more. They were now at the Taeshan 19 yard line. The Taeshan CB picked off a pass from Desna Osopno and ran it back to the Taeshan 37 yard line. Taeshan went on a 20 yard drive before punting again. The defense was just too intense. 2 minutes remain, Abaja wastes the clock by running the ball. With 44 seconds left in the game, they punt the ball back to Taeshan. The Taeshan QB threw a 28 yard pass to his TE. He then threw an incomplete pass. Jacob Nebasu (ROLB) tipped another pass. 15 seconds left now. The Taeshan QB throws a bullet to his WR for 19 yards, and the WR runs out of bounds. 9 seconds left, Taeshan on the Abaja 38 yard line, The QB throws a deep pass. The WR catches it, but is he in bounds? NO! No touchdown! His feet in the back of the end-zone and Taeshan suffers a heartbreaking loss. Abaja moves to 6-2, second in their group.

COMMENTS

2,747 Comments

Franklin Mufa -Joined Nov 29, 2010

14 mins ago- phew! that last play almost gave me a heart attack! thank goodness the wr was out of bounds!

Jumbo -Joined Sep 3, 2007

45 mins ago- *Yawn* this game was a snoozer. the only thing that got everyone out of their seat was that last play

MathMagician -Joined Jul 14, 2011

31 mins ago- And of course he can't stay in bounds...

FishyFishay11 -Joined Oct 20, 2011

1 hour ago- yes! another win! haha taeshan@!

Spongebob Squarepants4213 -Joined Mar 28, 2012

51 mins ago- bobby odende again getting another receiving TD.. nothing new!

Read More

by **The united states of Saints** » Sat May 07, 2016 7:17 pm

Paladins win 14-20 against Shytysle, wins series

Aprilian Times -- The Palasins pulled off a nice win against Shytysle in the last game of the series. The score at the end of the game was 14-20. With noticeable signs of the offense coming alive late in this tournament, they did well. Matt Whelan had an exceptional game today and said after the game that he is more confident than ever before in his skills. Shytysle put up a good fight as well put never got the lead the whole game.

For the Paladins offense Matt Whelan went 25-35 passing for 275 yards and 3 Touchdowns, 0 interceptions, and no sacks. The offensive line gave him all the time in the world to be able to kake good throws and time for the receivers to get open. On one of their scoring drives Whelan threw a bomb downfield for a 68 yard touchdown giving them the lead 7-0. Miguel Black had an off day today going for 57 yards on 19 carries. Louis Nakamura missed one extra point attempt in the third quarter on their second scoring drive. The Paladins defense were able to hold off Shytysle's offense until the end grabbing two sacks, a fumble, no interceptions, but 6 deflections.

Around Group A United States of Devonta beat kareut 14-28. Allamunic States defeated Frenline Delpha 15-3. With this matchday over lets look at Group A's leaderboard:

Group A
Shytysle 14–20 The united states of Saints
Mareut 14–28 United States of Devonta
Allamunic States 15–3 Frenline Delpha

# Group A                      Pld    W   L    GF   GA   GD 
1 The united states of Saints    7    6   1   105   88  +17
2 Allamunic States               7    6   1   111   29  +82
3 Frenline Delpha                7    4   3   126   90  +36
4 Shytysle                       7    3   4   120  129   −9
5 United States of Devonta       7    2   5    70  110  −40
6 Mareut                         7    0   7    40  126  −86

The Paladins are still at the top but with tomorrow's match against The Regulars will they win the group if they win? Watch for an exciting match tomorrow that could determine who wins Group A.

In the Locker room coach agresta addresses the players:

"Fellas I'm glad you didn't underestimate them out there. Since you didn't you won. But now we face a real challenge, The Regulars. Remember last game we barely won. This game will be even closer than the last time and its way more important. Hell if we win we may win the group. So give it your all tomorrow because you know what they are capable of. Many people think our first victory against them was a fluke. Lets show them that it wasn't because we know it wasn't and I'm sure our opponents know it too and they will be ready. Dismissed."

by **Drawkland** » Sat May 07, 2016 7:28 pm

Cutoff! I don't have anything for mother's day, but here's some Variations on a Korean Folk Song.
This isn't a recording of my band but when we played it I played the gong. Okay, now I'll stop typing and start scoring.

Your Words: Arrow, Bridge, Insect. If anybody wants to do this.

Group A
The united states of Saints 12–33 Allamunic States
Frenline Delpha 19–0 Mareut
United States of Devonta 27–6 Shytysle

# Group A                      Pld    W   L    GF   GA   GD 
1 Allamunic States               8    7   1   144   41 +103
2 The united states of Saints    8    6   2   117  121   −4
3 Frenline Delpha                8    5   3   145   90  +55
4 United States of Devonta       8    3   5    97  116  −19
5 Shytysle                       8    3   5   126  156  −30
6 Mareut                         8    0   8    40  145 −105

Group B
Anglatia 16–13 Ko-oren
Ethane 23–0 Holy Philippine Empire
The Orion Islands 0–16 Falatulu

# Group B                      Pld    W   L    GF   GA   GD
1 Anglatia                       8    8   0   126   45  +81
2 Ethane                         8    5   3    84   57  +27
3 Falatulu                       8    5   3    97   55  +42
4 Ko-oren                        8    4   4   127   70  +57
5 The Orion Islands              8    1   7    60  153  −93
6 Holy Philippine Empire         8    1   7    37  151 −114

Group C
Texasa 14–14 West Phoencia (17–14 OT)
Cuatro 10–23 Barunia
San Jose Guayabal 3–21 Equestrian States

# Group C                      Pld    W   L    GF   GA   GD
1 Equestrian States              8    8   0   123   15 +108
2 San Jose Guayabal              8    5   3    90  124  −34
3 Barunia                        8    4   4   122   70  +52
4 West Phoencia                  8    3   5    60   95  −35
5 Texasa                         8    3   5    60   78  −18
6 Cuatro                         8    1   7    39  112  −73

Group D
The Nation of Downination 14–21 The Sword Bloke
Gregoryisgodistan 7–14 Abanhfleft
United Vietussia 7–0 Leaf Kingdom

# Group D                      Pld    W   L    GF   GA   GD
1 Gregoryisgodistan              8    6   2   106   37  +69
2 Abanhfleft                     8    6   2   137   88  +49
3 United Vietussia               8    5   3   103   95   +8
4 The Sword Bloke                8    5   3   118   84  +34
5 The Nation of Downination      8    2   6    87  123  −36
6 Leaf Kingdom                   8    0   8    44  168 −124

Clinched #1 Seeding
Clinched Playoff Showing
Impossible to reach Playoffs

by **Chromatika** » Sat May 07, 2016 8:39 pm

The Iron Legion - Part 8

Daniel Acevedo had had a quiet World Bowl so far for The Iron Legion. He hadn't fumbled the ball in any of his punt returns, but neither had he gotten much going; their punt return yards average was 7.8 yards per return. This was not his fault, though, as opposing coverage teams were doing their jobs. He knew that it was a waiting game, however, and so he kept going out there, taking his duty seriously. The curious strategy employed by Von Schroeder meant that punt returns were over half of the steps Acevedo got to play in; as a fourth receiver, he maybe appeared in five offensive snaps per game unless a major injury occurred. This made it so that every return meant even more to him.

Then, a game like the one against Cosumar came, almost as if sent by some higher power. Acevedo single handedly carried The Iron Legion to a win, setting up the field goal with a return to the Dragons' forty-three in the second quarter and scoring the game-winning touchdown in the third quarter, a seventy-three yard return where he juked around three would-be-tacklers and sped away from the rest of the field to paydirt. In a game where Nathaniel Mercado threw his first two interceptions of this World Bowl and McDonald was stymied by the Dragons' defense, special teams shone, showing that The Iron Legion has players that can step up on all phases of the game.

Now, barring an upset at the hands of Halleconia or Zacistania, The Iron Legion may actually finish undefeated in the Group Stage, while Cosumar and The Royal Kingdom of Quebec are fighting for second place.This for a team that was just put together for this World Bowl, after the first ever professional season for Chromatika's Gridiron in history? Much like a dream come true.

by **Kaboomlandia** » Sat May 07, 2016 9:03 pm

Arkans blown out 34-0 by Kaboomlandia

After a one-year absence, the Phoenix are headed back to the World Bowl playoffs. A 34-0 win over the Republic of Arkan put the team at 7-1, three games clear of Rennidan. Travis Reuben started, but it was Andrew "Tank" Michaels that absolutely bludgeoned the Arkan defense, running for 144 yards and four touchdowns. With this win, the Phoenix remain tied with Schottia, who they will play tomorrow in a game that will likely decide the number-one seed out of Group F. Kaboomlandia lost the coin toss, so they started with the ball. The team played it safe during this first half, mostly handing the ball off to Michaels, who scored two touchdowns during the first half. The defense, meanwhile, played against the pass mostly, but the linebackers held their own, stopping the run well.

By five minutes into the third quarter, the team was already up 21-0 and not slowing down. After the team popped another touchdown on another Michaels run late in the third, the Phoenix yanked Reuben for Jones, pulled Michaels out of the game, and ran the ball up the middle the rest of the way. And McCallum still kicked two field goals.

Here is where the standings sit now:

Group F                        Pld   W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Schottia                      8    7   1   172   63 +109
2 Kaboomlandia                  8    7   1   206   58 +148
3 Rennidan                      8    4   4    89   70  +19
4 HUElavia                      8    4   4    82  135  −53
5 The Republic of Arkan         8    2   6    59  149  −90
6 Vrai                          8    0   8    20  153 −133

Schottia defeated Kaboomlandia 31-24 in the first game the two teams played, and the first tiebreak is head-to-head point differential. However, the Phoenix have the next tiebreak, which is overall point differential. Therefore:

Schottia clinches Group F if they defeat Kaboomlandia or lose by less than seven points.
Kaboomlandia clinches Group F if they defeat Schottia by seven points or more.

It all comes down to tomorrow's game. The Phoenix would much rather get an Ethane or a San Jose Guayabal, who are both 5-3, than a weaker group winner such as Gregoryisgodistan, who the Phoenix were shut out by last World Bowl.

So. Top spot or bust!

works? · by **Abanhfleft** » Sun May 08, 2016 12:52 am

Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five Part Six Part Seven Part Eight Part Nine Part Ten Part Eleven Part Twelve Part Thirteen Part Fourteen Part Fifteen Part Sixteen Part Seventeen Part Eighteen Part Nineteen

No Place For Heroes, Part Twenty

Route 620
5 kilometers outside Al Jawal, Gharbambiyah

The remnants of four vehicles which had once been occupied by members of Edward Eskalumbuye's rebel militia burned fiercely under the bright morning sun of Gharbambiyah. It was just the first blow struck by the joint Gharbambiyan Army and World Assembly task force assigned to retake Al Jawal from the clutches of Eskalumbuye and his men. The Predator drone which had fired the missiles circled the site impersonally, as it was just a collection of metal, steel, carbon fiber, and semiconductors and had no personal feelings about the attack. But its operator was not so aloof about the attack, but mostly because his superior, General Rowan Balladur, and an agent from Abanhfleft's Republican Bureau of Investigation, had realized too late that there were two hostages among the numerous rebels in the convoy.

What those three people in the hangar of Chah Rajawhm National Airport didn't know was that just before the Stinger missile had struck the pickup truck carrying the two hostages, those two hostages had managed to push away the bed of the truck to which they had been chained, and they dropped to the ground just as the missile struck the pickup like an arrow, and the explosion even helped to throw the bed away from the main blast.

The bed of the pickup was lying upside down on the sand, and the Predator made one last pass over the now-destroyed convoy to check if there were any survivors. Finding none, the pilot commanded the drone to return to base, but as it turned out, the drone turned away just a little bit too early, as it didn't capture the truck bed shifting and then being turned over by two women.

Ellen Quest and Elizabeth Glenn pushed away the truck bed from over them in an attempt to catch the attention of the Predator, but by the time they clambered out from underneath the flimsy metal bed, the drone was too far away to see them. "Damn it!" Ellie cursed as she watched the drone fly away. "Jesus Christ, are we supposed to be stuck here in the desert for all eternity?"

"It doesn't have to be that way, you know, Ellie," Lizzie said. "Maybe you could use that coin of yours to get us out of here."

"I'm not bartering it for a camel if that's what you mean," Ellie retorted. "This coin has been a real lucky charm for me, and I'll be damned if I give it up for even a camel that could get us out of here!"

"Speaking of camels, where are they?" Lizzie asked. "I mean, wasn't Gharbambiyah supposed to be the only country where the camels outnumbered the people?"

"I don't know; I'm not an expert at that kind of thing!" Ellie said. "I'm not old like Gab!" she added, referring to Gabriel de Galicia, the oldest and wisest member of their deniable operations unit. She sighed and said, "All right, how far away do you think Al Jawal is?"

"Ugh, don't make us walk back there, Ellie, please!" Lizzie groaned. "Remember the last time that we tried to walk our way out of this place? I don't think I can handle being stoned to death again!"

"We're not going to be stoned to death this time, okay?" Ellie said. "If Eskalumbuye's men are running, then the townspeople aren't going to lift a finger against us anymore. The only reason why they did that last night was because the rebels were in town and scaring the people into submission."

"Well, that's not nice," Lizzie muttered. "Scaring people into attacking other people. No wonder I really hate Eskalumbuye's boys."

"So what do you say? One mile or two?" Ellie asked.

"How can I know? I never took whatever it is you take to learn how to measure distance without a stick!"

"One and a half miles is more like it," Ellie muttered, ignoring Lizzie's ranting. She then rattled the chains that were still keeping them attached to the truck bed and said, "Chop chop, Liz! If we're walking back to town, we might as well get some shade over us! Bloody thoughtful of those rebels, innit?"

"RBI, I have clearance; let me in."

"Let him in," General Balladur told the MP. The MP lowered his arms and let Dennis Messi into the tactical center.

"Gerry, General, I have good news and bad news," he said.

"What's the good news?" Gerry and Balladur asked at the same time. They looked at each other and then decided to let the matter drop.

"The good news is that Ellie and Lizzie are still alive," Denny replied. "I don't know how they did it, but they did. Somehow, they managed to survive the explosion from the drone attack. If I was a religious guy, I'd say that it's a miracle!"

"All right, now what's the bad news, Denny?" Gerry asked.

"The bad news is that they're going back to Al Jawal."

"Excuse me, Mr. Messi," Balladur said. "Forgive me for asking this, but how is this bad news for your agents?"

"Well, aside from the fact that your peacekeepers and the Gharbambiyan Army are going into Al Jawal to kick out Eddie Eskalumbuye from there once and for all," Denny replied, "there is the fact that there is still an unknown number of insurgents in the town. We don't know how many of them we took out in the drone attack, but it can't be that many because there were just four vehicles, and only one of them was a truck. We don't know how many more rebels are still in Al Jawal, but we can only assume that there are still a lot of them and that if they encounter them, they will either recapture them or just kill them outright."

"How long will it take to get another rescue mission up and ready?" Gerry asked.

"It's going to take some while," Denny admitted. "Rysa and the pilots are still recovering from their wounds, and Fernando's quite pissed that the rebels shot down his quote-unquote 'priceless Alouette'." Denny even mimed air quotes to emphasize his point.

Gerry sighed, shook his head, and then turned to the general. "General Balladur, are there any assets that you could possibly lend to us so we can extract my agents?"

Balladur shook his head. "I'm sorry, Mr. Anthony," he replied. "But all of our combat-capable aircraft and helicopters have been assigned to the assault. We only have a few transport choppers available, and I don't think that's exactly what you're looking for."

"You're right, General, you're right," Gerry said, nodding his head. "Well, thank you for your time, General," he said, offering his hand. "We will keep you updated with the status of our agents."

"You're welcome, Mr. Anthony," Balladur said as he shook Gerry's hand. "Mr. Messi," he said to Denny as they shook hands as well.

"So, Denny, what do you say about speeding up the process of our getting ready to bring Ellie and Lizzie back home?" Gerry asked Denny as soon as they were out of the WA's field headquarters.

"I honestly don't know how we're going to go about this, boss man," Denny replied. "I mean, Alvin's still knocked out; Fabio just got his forehead sewn up and I don't know how long he'll have to heal; and Rysa... I don't know what Rysa's up to right now."

"How much time do we have left?"

"We simply have no idea. It could be a few days, or it could be just a few hours. We don't know because there are so many variables."

"That's what really bothers me. Denny," Gerry admitted. "We simply have no idea how to go about this, so we can't do anything. Hang on, my phone's ringing," he said as he reached for his phone. And then he did a double take as he saw who was making the call. It was Ellie. Gerry answered the call in trepidation. "Hello?"

"Gerry, it's Ellie," Ellie Quest's faint and scratchy voice said from Gerry's phone.

"Ellie? Is that really you? Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm okay, Gerry, but Liz and I aren't exactly good right now."

"Is Liz with you? How are you two doing? Are you at the bridge yet?" The last sentence was a coded question intended to determine if Ellie and Lizzie were still free or if they had been captured by the enemy.

"There aren't any bridges here, Gerry," Ellie replied. Gerry nodded his head. The two women hadn't been captured... yet.

"Okay, where exactly are you?" he asked.

"Somewhere outside of town. Liz and I are trying to make our way back there to find a place where we can wait out the sun's peak hours."

"Okay, that's good, that's good. I've got some bad news for you: we don't know how long it is before we'll be able to go there, and the WA and the Gharbambiyan Army are preparing to move in on the town and kick out Eskalumbuye once and for all."

"Well, then, I guess we better get moving to some safe shelter," Ellie said.

"Damned right you should," Gerry muttered. Then, loudly, he said, "Look, just keep out of sight and out of mind. If they don't see you, hopefully they'll forget about you. Heck, I even hope that they think that you died with their buddies in that drone attack."

"I was thinking just about the same thing," Ellie said. "Well, gotta go, Gerry. We're roasting right here." Ellie then ended the call.

"That was Ellie," Gerry said to Denny. "She and Lizzie are high-tailing it back to Al Jawal. They're both safe and free."

"Well, that's good to hear," Denny said. "I just hope that when we find them, it won't be because the buzzards and insects are flying over their bodies."

"You've got a morbid mind, Denny," Gerry said, "but you've also got a point."

by **Ko-oren** » Sun May 08, 2016 1:46 am

Dragonflies lose again

In probably our worst World Bowl since, well, practically our first World Bowl, the Dragonflies lost another game to tie up the record to 4-4. The Union of Ko-oren entered Group B as the fourth overall ranked team, but since matchday three, all ranks and history are out of the window as we are the team that has everything going against them.

How different it was after two matchdays. Ko-oren was sitting in first with comfortable victories over the Orion Islands and Ethane (29-7 and 17-0). The offence was well managed by Sebastien Germain, finding Niek Molenaar for 140 yards and a touchdown in the first game and combining with Christophersen and August in the second game for a touchdown and over 100 yards each. The defence was stellar as always with the 4-3 front used, and Aldaine and Ratliff were true plagues to the opposing offensive lines, for 3 sacks for Aldaine and 2.5 for Ratliff in the first two games. Nobody would've expected the string of bad games that it turned out to become. If things turn sour, the idea was that we'd just have to cross that bridge when we would come to it. How quickly we would arrive at that bridge.

Since then, the Unionite defence recorded less than three interceptions per game, which is otherwise our strongest feat. Since that second game, the team has lost 10-13 in overtime, 7-3, 14-13 and 16-13. Wins against the Holy Philippine Empire (13-7) and the rematch against the Orion Islands (29-6) are simply not enough.

We can see a common theme in our losses so far. The first was a three-point deficit, then four, then one and lastly three. It's not like our team can't keep up with our foes, it's not that we allow a lot of points. It's just that somehow, we get outscored in very low scoring games. We often go into the fourth quarter with a small lead. The 10-13 loss was 10-7 at the start of the fourth quarter. The 7-3 loss was 0-3 with 15 minutes to go. The 14-13 game was 13-7, and the 16-13 game, well, that one was lost from the start, with Ko-oren trailing 16-10 at half time. We need a team that can close out a game. Run down the clock, keep possession and a defence that's always ready to take over when needed.

The 16-13 loss to Anglatia makes us go 4-4 and drop to fourth in the group, behind Ethane and Fatatulu (5-3) and Anglatia (8-0). First place is way out of our reach, but second place should still be possible. It requires us winning the last two games, and them to lose at least one out of their remaining two games.

At the start of the eighth game, the Dragonflies were not a team that was ready to throw in the towel and try again next World Bowl. In fact, they were resistant and did not give up even so much as an inch to the Anglatian offence as they took to the field. Cara Devlin had huge troubles to get her offence to find a first down. The first three plays went as follows: run by Ciar Slane, tackled for a 2 yard loss - pass to Bojan Atlewood, incomplete - pass to Ray Ishikawa, caught for 6 yards. Staring at 4th and 6, the punt personnel came on to try to pin down Ko-oren. The first four plays by Ko-oren went as follows, just to show the difference between the teams in the first phase of the game: Pass to Molenaar, caught for 12 yards, new first down. Run by Iddawg Pritchett, win of five yards. Pass to Yun, new first down. Pass to Molenaar, incomplete. Despite the incomplete pass to finish off the first four plays, this is a big difference with the initial difficulty for the Anglatians. However, the tide turned quickly as Devlin found Zero Davidovic in the endzone with a 21-yard pass, and Anglatia was up 7-0 (PAT was good). The Union of Ko-oren hunted for a field goal to close out the first quarter, but time was up before the team crossed the 50 yard line. In the second quarter, things went south quickly. A punt at 4th and 20 for Anglatia landed within the Ko-orenite five, meaning Germain would start the drive within his own endzone. Never give an opportunity like that to Torrace Allen, who couldn't be stopped by Ananyev, and Anglatia was up 9-0 with a safety. That's actually the first safety suffered by the national team since World Bowl 26.

The rest of the second quarter wasn't much better. Devlin herself ran for a touchdown from the 6-yard line for a 16-0 lead, but as half time loomed, the Dragonflies suddenly connected and a 40-yard pass was taken to the endzone by Makarovich. Germain's pass was low but extremely fast, like a bullet from a gun, or an arrow going straight for target. At 16-7, the next drive for Anglatia was halted within 30 yards of their goalposts with a Kawehi Kalani interception. There were 10 seconds left, and the team opted for a field goal to come very close to Anglatia within minutes: 16-10. Just five game clock minutes earlier, it was 16-0. Leticia Carrico followed up that field goal with another field goal in the third quarter to seal the score 16-13.

Things will have to change quickly. The Dragonflies are still a great team, but they need to close out a game to avoid being crushed like insects, even if that is what dragonflies technically are. Stop being a dragonfly that is a literal insect, and start playing like a majestically flying dragonfly, fast and agile.

by **Banija** » Sun May 08, 2016 5:53 am

The All-Banija Sports Magazine
The only nationwide publication that is all sports, all the time!

Banijan starters score 30 points in the 1st half in 30-6 blowout victory over Nassau-Hessen

Robel Kassa celebrates the game's opening touchdown in the 1st quarter

BUSUKUMA- At halftime of Banija's last game, a game where they struggled to a 17-0 victory over the still winless Unified Isles, the Kingdom of Banija's Head Coach Ezekiel Daniachew made a bold decision at halftime. After his starting quarterback had been struggling for weeks on end to do anything with the offense, and with an offense that, through 6 games had been averaging less than 12 points per game, and then with the turnover problems Kovach had in those last two games, he made a switch at the quarterback position. Professional veteran quarterback Myles Debaba began to come off of the bench. He threw two touchdown passes in one half of football. While Daniachew refused to name a starting quarterback then, it is clear who the starting quarterback is right now. And his name is Myles Debaba.

The Banijan offense exploded out of the gate today. They did absolutely everything right in the 1st half. The only slight problem they had today was that they missed an extra point. Other than that, it was a beatdown of epic proportions over Nassau-Hessen, who were the seeded team of the group and, therefore, the pre-tournament favorites to win the group. Banija had 5 first half drives, and they scored 5 times, putting the ball in the end zone 4 times and kicking a 38 yarder for the 5th score. That also meant Banija was 3/3 with three touchdowns in their first half red zone attempts, and they might have been able to score a touchdown on the fifth drive too, but they simply ran out of time and had to kick a field goal before time expired on the half.

In the 1st quarter, Banija had two touchdowns. Both were passing touchdowns from Myles Debaba, on long, methodical drives, and the Banijan offense in total had possesion of the ball for over 11 minutes in the 1st quarter. Only allowing one first down on two possesions from their opponents in the 1st quarter, Banija really brought the game to Nassau-Hessen, and turned the game into a party for Banijan fans. Their first red zone trip on a 5 minute drive in the 1st quarter ended with a 9 yard out route for a touchdown on a 2nd & 1 to Robel Kassa for the game's opening score. Their next possession ended on a two yard fade route on 1st & goal to Vena Resnick to give this team a 14-0 lead.

Banija, of course, would continue to score. Their following possesion, that started at the end of the 1st quarter, ended up being a 6 minute drive, where the Banijans scored thanks to a 13 yard touchdown run on a 2nd & 2 from starting running back Abesalom Kahsu to give the team a 20-0 lead(they missed the ensuing extra point). Of course, at this point, with Banija scoring 3 times on 3 consecutive drives, the fight was knocked out of the Nassau-Hessen football team. At this point, it seemed as if there was nothing Banija could do wrong on both sides of the football. Of course, the 25 yard strike to Christos Cosse made the score 27-0, and with that, basically put the game away.

Nassau-Hessen tried to score one more time before the half. They had their first sustained drive of the ball game, getting quite a few first downs, and sniffing the Banijan red zone. However, driving down the field against one of the top defenses in international football is never going to be easy, and will always be the toughest in the red zone. On a 3rd down play from the 1 yard line with a minute to go, star defensive end Momir Litvinov forced a fumble that was recovered by the other defensive end, Adane Mulugeta, at the 20 yard line. Myles Debaba then drove his team down the field and they got to the 21 yard line, where kicker Beyne Yemane blasted it through the uprights to give his team a 30-0 lead at the half.

At this point, the 2nd half was simply a formality. The Banijan offense came back down to Earth, of course, but the damage had been done. The second string offense came out on the field to start the 4th quarter, and Nassau-Hessen did end up scoring a touchdown, though it was on a punt return in the 4th quarter, where they ended up missing the 2 point conversion anyways. Ezekiel Daniachew was extremely pleased with his team's performance today. "On both sides of the football, we played excellently. When you control the line of scrimmage and you learn how to play with some serious confidence, good things will happen, and the good thing that happened today was a Banijan victory. We are capable of scoring points, and our offense was rolling. However, we cannot rest on our laurels after this victory, no matter how strong it was. We need to come back to the practice field as we have our toughest game of the season coming up, against 6-2 Abaja to clinch a spot in the knockout stages, and to win the group outright. Our two sides, forgetting about the rankings, are easily the two best teams in this group, and the battle for group supremacy will come on the field, head to head, in Busukuma. Hopefully, our team can pull out the victory, and we can clinch a spot in the playoffs."

While these two teams, the 26th ranked Banijans and the unranked Abajans would not have been expected to be the top two teams of the group going into the tournament, it is clear that this is the reality of the tournament. It will be a tough game, in primetime, at the Stadium of the Restoration, but hopefully the boys can focus and pull off the home victory so we can wrap things up now, rather than risking it on a tricky road trip to MIlaris to end the season.

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