Dyrrachium wrote:Nature-Spirits wrote:So, my mom noticed that I've been shaving my legs again, and started telling me not to do it. Again. She claims that if she could do it all over again, she wouldn't, because according to her, the hair grows in darker (though it seems to me that exposure to sunlight would lighten it) and coarser (this is demonstrably false; it just looks that way because the hairs have a flat tip due to being cut, and I'm pretty sure that that effect wouldn't be permanent). She also said that "the Europeans don't shave their legs" -- which in many cases is true, but I don't see why that means I shouldn't. Shouldn't I do what makes me most comfortable? The fact is, my legs -- while not super hairy -- are still pretty hairy, and that means that I don't like showing them off. I rarely wear shorts, and when I wear a skirt, I almost always wear tights underneath, because I feel uncomfortable showing off my bare legs when they're hairy.
Plus, I really like the feel of hairless skin.
I like the feeling of shaved legs too, but got shamed by my class for doing so. Do what you want.
That's sad to hear. Thanks.
Val Halla wrote:I can't...
Wulfenia wrote:Nature-Spirits wrote:So, my mom noticed that I've been shaving my legs again, and started telling me not to do it. Again. She claims that if she could do it all over again, she wouldn't, because according to her, the hair grows in darker (though it seems to me that exposure to sunlight would lighten it) and coarser (this is demonstrably false; it just looks that way because the hairs have a flat tip due to being cut, and I'm pretty sure that that effect wouldn't be permanent). She also said that "the Europeans don't shave their legs" -- which in many cases is true, but I don't see why that means I shouldn't. Shouldn't I do what makes me most comfortable? The fact is, my legs -- while not super hairy -- are still pretty hairy, and that means that I don't like showing them off. I rarely wear shorts, and when I wear a skirt, I almost always wear tights underneath, because I feel uncomfortable showing off my bare legs when they're hairy.
Plus, I really like the feel of hairless skin.
1. I plan on waxing the back of my hips and legs, since it feels like I have to contort myself to shave there.
2. No idea why she would say that Europeans don't shave their legs. Even if true, why does it have any bearing on what you do?
1. Waxing seems kind of painful, but I've considered it myself, too.
2. That's pretty much my thought on the matter.
The Serbian Empire wrote:The Grey Wolf wrote:
My philosophy: refer to someone born with the male sex as "he" and the female sex as "she." if they grow older and tell me they're actually a he, she, or neither, I'll refer to them as that. I can't see what's hard about it.
Yeah, I agree... Then you have the jarring ones like myself who hid for years pretending to be hypermasculine trying to hide the reality. It failed to work... I think the best options I would utilize is a gendered name with a unisex middle.
That reminds me of a person I once met. She's a cis girl, but her mom gave her a masculine middle name in case she turned out to be a trans guy. Pretty cool.
Schwere Panzer Abieltung 502 wrote:How hurtful is it to misgender someone? I know this varies depending on whom you ask, but the thought came to me that making a trans woman/man go into a martial arts tournament divided by gender as the gender they used to be(or anything which is separated by gender) could be a very unhappy experience. It's not only not affirming their lifestyle choice, but it's very hard to argue that the purpose of that is to do anything other than be insulting.
Well, as you said, it depends on the person. For me.... Hm. Except when I actually am a guy, I generally don't like being referred to as male, and although I can deal with it, repetition does wear me down. Occasionally, if it's been happening a lot in a short period of time, and especially if I have other stressors going on at the same time, I end up in a really bad place.
That said, it bothers me more when I'm misgendered by someone who knows about my gender than if I'm misgendered by someone who doesn't know. I tend to feel dysphoria either way, but if the person knows, it feels like a personal insult on top of that. If they don't know, I forgive them no problem, even though it does hurt.