GOOD THING IT'S PLAYED ON ICE
Grizzlies sore after narrow win over hosts
by Sven Magnusson
ZYARN, QUINTESSENCE OF DUST (TP) - The sometimes-ridiculous Quodite science programme ¡SCIENCE BLAST! is often criticised in the host nation for being over the top and recklessly irresponsible, but they did manage to make a good prediction for the game between the Quodites and Toyur. Their study into what happens when an unstoppable force (the Grizzlies' offensive machine) meets an immovable object (the Quodite defensive wall, allowing only 8 goals in 10 games) came up with one of two results: a 4-4 game before overtime, or a 1-0 Grizzlies victory. Toyur slodged through the holding, hooking, grabbing, and generally roughing up by the Quodite players to come away with that 1-0 result, and advance into the quarter-finals of the World Cup of Hockey.
'I can see why they're so eager to host this competition,' said head coach Viktor Brandin, himself the victim of a bump by a Quodite player as they left the ice for the second intermission. 'It may be international rules, but they wouldn't get away with all of that stuff anywhere else.'
Toyur's speed drew a staggering 8 penalties against the home side, who were well supported at the Eli F. Baker Memorial Arena in Zyarn. Deafening roars were heard anytime a host player made a hit, or a penalty was killed off. Ironically, Toyur were the home team on the scoreboard, being the higher-seeded team going into this game. Life was also difficult on the Grizzlies bench, where the security assigned to guard the area behind the glass on the bench was more interested in watching the game than preventing any mishaps between the fans and Toyuri players. Markus Brahe spent much of his time on the bench arguing with the Quodites behind the glass, but thankfully nothing came to blows or an international incident.
The game itself was a sluggish affair. Toyur were called for many offside calls after Quodite players delayed their tagging up at the blue line, or pushed players over the blue line before the puck crossed it when Toyur were attempting to enter the zone. The home team seemed less interested in scoring than roughing up the opponents, making the Grizzlies wish they were back at Finntasia to soak in the state-of-the-art jacuzzi tubs to relax their muscles after the game.
The only goal of the game came late in the second period. Whilst on the powerplay, Niklas Aspelin's point shot was tipped by Niels Linderoth past John Romkema in the Quodite goal. The Grizzlies managed to hold on for the 1-0 win, eliminating the hosts and escaping further physicality.
The quarterfinal matchup should be more of a calmer affair, at least in terms of physical play. The Grizzlies will now take on the Rockets of Newmanistan, themselves a team who can score seemingly at will, in New Cleethorpes. Newmanistan won their much calmer affair with Secristan 3-1. It should not be a game for one who enjoys a defensive spectacle. The game can be seen on TSTV1.
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TOYUR vs Quintessence of Dust
SCORING SUMMARY
First Period
No Scoring
Shots on Goal: Toyur 9 (9), QoD 5 (5)
Second Period
TOY N. Linderoth (4) (Aspelin, Jansson; 16:45 PP)
Shots on Goal: Toyur 10 (19), QoD 7 (12)
Third Period
No Scoring
Shots on Goal: Toyur 10 (29), QoD 8 (20)
Three Stars:
1. Niels Linderoth (Toyur)
2. John Romkema (Quintessence of Dust)
3. Dietrich Harmann (Quintessence of Dust)