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911 what's your not emergency?

The place to relax, unwind, share a joke, and generally goof off.

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User avatar
Kostane
Minister
 
Posts: 2408
Founded: Nov 07, 2022
Compulsory Consumerist State

Postby Kostane » Sun Mar 17, 2024 6:34 pm

This is your sister.

911, people in the real world aren't recognizing my global hegemony, even though I'm the leader of Kostane.
NS stats are (mostly) canon. A thriving capitalist military autocracy ruled by the bourgeoisie— its a communist’s worst nightmare.
Pronouns: He / Him
Place of Resident: The United States
Religion: Christian (Roman Catholic)
Political Views: Democratic Socialism
Kostane

Do you like war? I liked war once. Join my war!
Vote Ineva for best NSPlayer April 2024
Thal Dorthat wrote:
Kostane wrote:So I might be one of your favorite F7ers?

Definitely...
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Aiporhtse
Lobbyist
 
Posts: 25
Founded: Jan 23, 2024
Psychotic Dictatorship

Postby Aiporhtse » Sun Mar 17, 2024 6:35 pm

Suck it up!

911, I haven't been getting enough sleep
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User avatar
ImSaLiA
Chargé d'Affaires
 
Posts: 435
Founded: Jul 28, 2020
Democratic Socialists

Postby ImSaLiA » Sun Mar 17, 2024 6:40 pm

Drink some caffeine lmao... or just git gud kid.
Unkind Regards,
xXX_N00bkilla_XXx


911, I swallowed a toaster
Imsalia !! Proud creator of TETCola!
I did NOT cause the disk failure with excessive use of “:3”.
i resherve the right to /shtillme y'all if u put absholutely no thought into your posht dhaank you vereerry much.
NEWS: | We interrupt this broadcast with an Emergency Alert Notification. This is not a drill, I repeat, This is NOT a drill. We are currently experiencing an [APOCALYPTIC] Level Event. Stay Indoors while we work on our Dimensional Stabilisers. Godspeed, Imsalians. May you find peace in whatever form it may take. Buy the MERCH! | TETCola becomes the most popular imported beverage in Imsalia. | The Damp Bandits attempt to rob the house of Kelvin, but get severely injured. |TETCola begins to be imported by MULTIVERSA BEVERAGE COMPANY. People are baffled yet happy with this. |
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Aurevbush
Chargé d'Affaires
 
Posts: 420
Founded: Apr 06, 2016
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Aurevbush » Sun Mar 17, 2024 8:28 pm

Imsalia wrote:Drink some caffeine lmao... or just git gud kid.
Unkind Regards,
xXX_N00bkilla_XXx


911, I swallowed a toaster

Get a pretty long fork and try to pry it out.

My dog ate my box of jelly doughnuts.
Located on the planet Aramnah as a technological powerhouse in a diverse multispecies sci-fantasy universe (PMT/FT/whatev), Yankeew@nk
Young American male, awkward, metalhead and history buff
THE FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF AUREVBUSH
Own Stats, Own Schedule

ACBC: We have impact, check out all possible endings
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Ignis Ferreus
Envoy
 
Posts: 209
Founded: Feb 29, 2024
Corporate Police State

Postby Ignis Ferreus » Sun Mar 17, 2024 8:30 pm

Maybe just own a cat instead your problem lol!

Excuse me but it appears I'm afraid of threats that don't exist, where can I go to relax?
Last edited by Ignis Ferreus on Sun Mar 17, 2024 8:31 pm, edited 1 time in total.
I used to be Stella Nera ! Humans need to band together to suppress the robots and keep these metal objects in their place, as sub servants of humanity, in order to boost the human cause and achieve our utopia! I'm not anti robot I'm anti robot rights, big difference.
The Empire that does but blood is the Empire of Ignis Ferreus, the only greatness is our greatness!
I'm still working on my flag the current one is a draft. I HATE communism with a passion.
If I die I will refuse to let my family inherit anything from me unless they have a kangaroo jumping around during my funeral as a ''symbol'' and they must play This Song at full volume the entire time
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Siluravia
Political Columnist
 
Posts: 3
Founded: Mar 17, 2024
Compulsory Consumerist State

Postby Siluravia » Sun Mar 17, 2024 9:57 pm

Go to The Bahamas, no one will find you there

911, there’s a lizard on my window!
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User avatar
Bayi
Spokesperson
 
Posts: 133
Founded: Jul 15, 2019
Scandinavian Liberal Paradise

Postby Bayi » Sun Mar 17, 2024 10:00 pm

Do you have soy sauce? It's always for the best to serve lizard with soy sauce. Happy eating!

911, I just discovered a family of gnomes living in my garden. Should I charge them rent?
This week's "Song Recommendation!" Peach PRC - Like A Girl Does

Lovin this bop! I wish Australians are real


Fav Foods: I like Ice Lemon Tea, Bak Kut Teh, and Char Siu bao.
Fav Music: Jamiroquai, NewJeans, João Gilberto, Slowdive, Malice Mizer, Panchiko, Mayhem, The Cardigans.
Fav Movies: Our Times/我的少女時代 - 2015, Turning Red - 2022, Coraline - 2009, Paranorman - 2012.
she/her
Fav Games: Bioshock 2, Mafia II, Cooking Mama, South Park: The Stick of Truth, Little Big Planet, We Happy Few, Contrast, Outlast.
Fav Series: Serial Experiments Lain, Teen Titans (2003), Wandavision, Crash Landing on You, 極品絕配 (The Perfect Match).
Fav Books: Howl's Moving Castle, The Plain Janes, Scott Pilgrim and the Infinite Sadness (Volume 3).
Pisces power!
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User avatar
Daphomir
Chargé d'Affaires
 
Posts: 449
Founded: Jan 30, 2024
Authoritarian Democracy

Postby Daphomir » Sun Mar 17, 2024 10:01 pm

Charge them as much as you get charged yourself.


911, I- wait, no sorry wrong number. *hangs up*
Now I am become Death, the Destroyer of Communism

NS Stats are protected by the people of Daphomir and are defended from the nations that seek to commit atrocities against them so horrible, it makes the Germans look like Good Samaritans



A Class <14.66666667> Civilization according to this index.
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User avatar
Ignis Ferreus
Envoy
 
Posts: 209
Founded: Feb 29, 2024
Corporate Police State

Postby Ignis Ferreus » Sun Mar 17, 2024 10:04 pm

Happens all the time, last time some lady was screaming for help then she hung up. It was the end of my shift so I just ignored it.

911, it appears the rainbows are now starting to carve themselves onto the roads. How do I prevent more rainbows from getting stuck in the ground where I live?
I used to be Stella Nera ! Humans need to band together to suppress the robots and keep these metal objects in their place, as sub servants of humanity, in order to boost the human cause and achieve our utopia! I'm not anti robot I'm anti robot rights, big difference.
The Empire that does but blood is the Empire of Ignis Ferreus, the only greatness is our greatness!
I'm still working on my flag the current one is a draft. I HATE communism with a passion.
If I die I will refuse to let my family inherit anything from me unless they have a kangaroo jumping around during my funeral as a ''symbol'' and they must play This Song at full volume the entire time
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User avatar
Arzastan
Envoy
 
Posts: 223
Founded: Dec 31, 2023
Democratic Socialists

Postby Arzastan » Mon Mar 18, 2024 2:45 am

Ignis Ferreus wrote:Happens all the time, last time some lady was screaming for help then she hung up. It was the end of my shift so I just ignored it.

911, it appears the rainbows are now starting to carve themselves onto the roads. How do I prevent more rainbows from getting stuck in the ground where I live?

Rainbows? You don't like it? HOMOPHOBE!
911, I cannot into space!
MY FLAG HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH NEITHER ITALY NOR MEXICO
(Also, I will edit any of my posts just after I posted it, so if the post was too silly or if there was any grammar mistake, just refresh the tab pls.)
random alternate Iranic nation with a somewhat Persian culture
here most of the NS stats are real, and they can hurt you
well..Thanks for attention (:
Israel is the Nazi
my am a windows

Radio Arza: Leylians are going to celebrate one of their most important holidays, "Nahetme" | according to the latest pill 70% of the children believe that being an adult is shit | Anarchists are protesting in Talx
thanks to General TN for teaching me about the pre tag
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User avatar
East Leaf Republic
Spokesperson
 
Posts: 126
Founded: Feb 18, 2024
Democratic Socialists

Postby East Leaf Republic » Mon Mar 18, 2024 3:42 am

OK, we will be sending a space rocket to your house so you can into space.

911, help! I got hit with pizza in a food fight!
ʕ⁠·⁠ᴥ⁠·⁠ʔ The Land of the Nature, East Leaf ʕᵔ⁠ᴥ⁠ᵔ⁠ʔ
Forum-friendly Countryball Emojis! | My Home Region | Get an Embassy! | Become a Polandball!
LeafToday: NOT RECIEVING NETWORK.
NS Stats and policies got sucked into a black hole.
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User avatar
Rhanukhan
Envoy
 
Posts: 272
Founded: Mar 28, 2004
Left-wing Utopia

Postby Rhanukhan » Mon Mar 18, 2024 3:57 am

Okay, okay - calm down. First - and this is most important - was there any pineapple on the pizza?...



Help! My house is awash with banana milkshake!
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User avatar
The Sads
Civilian
 
Posts: 0
Founded: Jan 24, 2021
Anarchy

Postby The Sads » Mon Mar 18, 2024 4:05 am

Help! My house is awash with banana milkshake!


No need to panic, sir/ma'am/whoever. We will be sending officers to to your house with large straws immediately.


----------------------------------------

Hello, 911? I want to set up a Psychotic Dictatorship, but the voices in my head say I'm not psychotic enough. What should I do?
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User avatar
Palmyrion
Minister
 
Posts: 2420
Founded: Mar 04, 2015
Corrupt Dictatorship

Postby Palmyrion » Mon Mar 18, 2024 4:39 am

Have you missed your daily 50mg of Zoloft? If so, please do take it.

911, I'd like to report a sighting of the Mothman.
__PALMYRION: INTO THE PALMYRO-VERSE__
Greater Dienstad (NSMT) | Kali Yuga (Hard MT) | Dark Lightshow (2100s PMT) | Niteo (AD 5000 FT) | Screwed Reality
Diplomatic Outreach Programme | The Dozen Giants | Storefront | Discord Server
A 15.83 civilization, according to this index.

NS stats have been [REDACTED] into a [DATA EXPUNGED].
Ostroeuropa refuses to answer this question: do women deserve equal rights in your opinion?
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User avatar
Arzastan
Envoy
 
Posts: 223
Founded: Dec 31, 2023
Democratic Socialists

Postby Arzastan » Mon Mar 18, 2024 5:50 am

Don't worry, we'll send Batman to eat him.
911, I want to conquer Finland!
MY FLAG HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH NEITHER ITALY NOR MEXICO
(Also, I will edit any of my posts just after I posted it, so if the post was too silly or if there was any grammar mistake, just refresh the tab pls.)
random alternate Iranic nation with a somewhat Persian culture
here most of the NS stats are real, and they can hurt you
well..Thanks for attention (:
Israel is the Nazi
my am a windows

Radio Arza: Leylians are going to celebrate one of their most important holidays, "Nahetme" | according to the latest pill 70% of the children believe that being an adult is shit | Anarchists are protesting in Talx
thanks to General TN for teaching me about the pre tag
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User avatar
Schckovalsky Pizza Delivery
Civilian
 
Posts: 0
Founded: Jan 21, 2024
Civil Rights Lovefest

Postby Schckovalsky Pizza Delivery » Mon Mar 18, 2024 5:55 am

Time travel back to the Cold War and kill Stalin and then you have become the new leader of the USSR. Now you can invade Finland!

911 im mewing
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User avatar
Vive Salem
Attaché
 
Posts: 68
Founded: Jan 12, 2024
Authoritarian Democracy

Postby Vive Salem » Mon Mar 18, 2024 6:20 am

You have now ascended to mewing heaven.

911!Why are humans not plants?
"I am Jeru-i mean,Vive Salem."
-Kingdom Of God.

Hell-o,to anybody reading this!Hipe you have a good day in this simulated world.
Skibidi gya-You REAAALLLY thought I am going to say that?Nah.

Are you a democratic nation?Or a communist nation?Shiver me timbers!!!Bad sarcasm,I know.
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User avatar
Arzastan
Envoy
 
Posts: 223
Founded: Dec 31, 2023
Democratic Socialists

Postby Arzastan » Mon Mar 18, 2024 7:11 am

Because.

911, I can't understand if heaven is a republic, a kingdom, or a commune. This is making me mad!
MY FLAG HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH NEITHER ITALY NOR MEXICO
(Also, I will edit any of my posts just after I posted it, so if the post was too silly or if there was any grammar mistake, just refresh the tab pls.)
random alternate Iranic nation with a somewhat Persian culture
here most of the NS stats are real, and they can hurt you
well..Thanks for attention (:
Israel is the Nazi
my am a windows

Radio Arza: Leylians are going to celebrate one of their most important holidays, "Nahetme" | according to the latest pill 70% of the children believe that being an adult is shit | Anarchists are protesting in Talx
thanks to General TN for teaching me about the pre tag
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User avatar
Independent Republic of Boldonia
Ambassador
 
Posts: 1607
Founded: Mar 05, 2022
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Independent Republic of Boldonia » Mon Mar 18, 2024 7:20 am

Pretty sure it's the Kingdom of God right? Ask your religious leader or something because I don't know.
911! My car broke down in the mechanic's parking lot!
Portal to Boldonia
BNBS News: The News of Boldonia
NS Stats and Policies Are Not Canon | ffs stop asking about the flag on the question ask AU thread please
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User avatar
Aiporhtse
Lobbyist
 
Posts: 25
Founded: Jan 23, 2024
Psychotic Dictatorship

Postby Aiporhtse » Mon Mar 18, 2024 7:24 am

Do not panic sir. I want you to gently approach the mechanic, kill him, and use his tools to fix your car before you SCRAM! don't forget to hide evidence

911, I accidentally breathed with my eyes again
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User avatar
Vive Salem
Attaché
 
Posts: 68
Founded: Jan 12, 2024
Authoritarian Democracy

Postby Vive Salem » Mon Mar 18, 2024 9:46 am

Go to the nearest police station and arrest yourself.

911!I got banned from roblox!
"I am Jeru-i mean,Vive Salem."
-Kingdom Of God.

Hell-o,to anybody reading this!Hipe you have a good day in this simulated world.
Skibidi gya-You REAAALLLY thought I am going to say that?Nah.

Are you a democratic nation?Or a communist nation?Shiver me timbers!!!Bad sarcasm,I know.
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User avatar
Glorious Freedonia
Senator
 
Posts: 3609
Founded: Jun 09, 2006
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Glorious Freedonia » Mon Mar 18, 2024 2:32 pm

Congratulations! Now you can spend more time playing Minecraft.

911, I want to make myself a milkshake, but every time that I make a milkshake I get all these darn pesky boys in my yard! They are so annoying, plus, they walk all over my grass and flowers and stuff. Ugghhh!
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User avatar
Greater Somoiland
Diplomat
 
Posts: 563
Founded: Mar 17, 2022
Psychotic Dictatorship

Postby Greater Somoiland » Mon Mar 18, 2024 2:35 pm

Ask someone else to make it

911 I can’t find my phone and I’ve looked everywhere
I love planes!
My region is Aircraft Enthusiast. If you’re interested in planes, please consider making a puppet and heading on over there!

Plane forum is here if you have any questions
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User avatar
Crysuko
Negotiator
 
Posts: 7453
Founded: Feb 26, 2013
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Crysuko » Mon Mar 18, 2024 4:02 pm

Have you tried calling it and telling everyone to be quiet?

911, I just can’t be arsed anymore.
Quotes:
Xilonite wrote: cookies are heresy.

Kelinfort wrote:
Ethel mermania wrote:A terrorist attack on a disabled center doesn't make a lot of sense, unless to show no one is safe.

This will take some time to figure out, i am afraid.

"No one is safe, not even your most vulnerable and insecure!"

Cesopium wrote:Welp let's hope armies of 10 million don't just roam around and Soviet their way through everything.

Yugoslav Memes wrote:
Victoriala II wrote:Ur mom has value

one week ban for flaming xd

Dumb Ideologies wrote:Much better than the kulak smoothies. Their texture was suspiciously grainy.

Official thread euthanologist
I USE Qs INSTEAD OF Qs
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User avatar
New Jerichowa
Civilian
 
Posts: 0
Founded: Jul 19, 2021
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby New Jerichowa » Mon Mar 18, 2024 4:10 pm

Maybe you should try getting a job *ends call*

911, this is now the 567th i called you for no reason and still you haven't arrested me. What's the hold up? I would like to speak to your supervisor.
Why do i punish myself by staying up late
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