God For A Week

[Great Nepal]

So kill the babies?

No.

Just not killing anyone.

So how are you going to reduce the population?

[Arumdaum]

No.

Just not killing anyone.

So how are you going to reduce the population?

Pshhh just because I think the world's overpopulated doesn't mean that I want to reduce it.

[Chinese Regions]

1. Get hundreds of palaces that spell out my name when viewed from other space
2. Make Kim jong-il and Qaddafi my biatches
3. Make thousands of topless Megan fox clones my servants
4.Turn all the world's trees into the cannabis plants.

[Grainne Ni Malley]

You take all the fun out of the fun of being God. See, I would find a way to make natural disasters interesting. Take earthquakes for example. Every time an earthquake happened, the ground would split open and popcorn would fly out. Then nobody could question my existence because people would be like: This MUST be God's doing.

The city of Christchurch NZ just called, they'd like to offer you the position of God, and wondered if you might be free to start as early as, say, last tuesday?

Yeah... about that... I'm pretty sure that was Lackadaisical's week, and you know how he gets, well, a bit tipsy... so, yeah. Sorry 'bout that.

[Great Nepal]

So how are you going to reduce the population?

Pshhh just because I think the world's overpopulated doesn't mean that I want to reduce it.

Oh well...

---

By the way, only I will do something better for world and not be selfish?

[Arumdaum]

Pshhh just because I think the world's overpopulated doesn't mean that I want to reduce it.

Oh well...

---

By the way, only I will do something better for world and not be selfish?

Having Nepal and Romania literally destroying Europe, Asia, and Africa and rule above all doesn't seem all that great for the world.

[Great Nepal]

Having Nepal and Romania literally destroying Europe, Asia, and Africa and rule above all doesn't seem all that great for the world.

I am not destroying any nation just giving them to Nepal/Romania.

[Kryozerkia]

After further deliberation, I've decided to add the following:

It would be impossible to dub anime; as a result, all anime would be available subtitled in the language of the viewer's choice.

All cookies would be fat and calorie-free while still having their full-intended flavour; no ingredients would be substituted for others.

The Vatican would mysteriously disappear into a massive sink hole, and from it would rise the ruins of Atlantis.

I create multi-dimensional rifts throughout the world. Only those deemed worthy would be able to step in. Everyone else who step through would find themselves in an ironic hell.

I'd make my own Q-Continuum. I would add myself to it so that when the week was up, I'd continue to exist in this state.

[Ceannairceach]

After further deliberation, I've decided to add the following:

It would be impossible to dub anime; as a result, all anime would be available subtitled in the language of the viewer's choice.

All cookies would be fat and calorie-free while still having their full-intended flavour; no ingredients would be substituted for others.

The Vatican would mysteriously disappear into a massive sink hole, and from it would rise the ruins of Atlantis.

I create multi-dimensional rifts throughout the world. Only those deemed worthy would be able to step in. Everyone else who step through would find themselves in an ironic hell.

I'd make my own Q-Continuum. I would add myself to it so that when the week was up, I'd continue to exist in this state.

Praise the god Kryo!

[Genivar]

No.

Just not killing anyone.

So how are you going to reduce the population?

Smite all those virgin rapists in africa, make it where all women can have no more then 2 kids.

[Novograd IV]

So, last night I was watching Bruce Almighty

Problem, that movie doesn't take into account omniscience or omnipresence.

but damn, if i were god for a week i'd see some places, maybe even spread the 'expect us' message in giant graffiti all over the world for the lulz.

'act of god' on Sea Org, maybe the WBC and some other religious nut-job places

little bit of chaos here and there

enjoy myself.

oh, and cure Cancer, destroy FOX and fix the AIDS problem.

[Cosmic Awareness]

I would create the perfect kingdom: Beautiful music, beautiful women, and peace

[Novograd IV]

I would create the perfect kingdom: Beautiful music, beautiful women, and peace

Now watch the US invade it for oil

[Arumdaum]

I would create the perfect kingdom: Beautiful music, beautiful women, and peace

Now watch the US invade it for oil

Psh but they wouldn't they have the perfect soldiers as well?

[Cosmic Awareness]

Now watch the US invade it for oil

Psh but they wouldn't they have the perfect soldiers as well?

There would be no oil in my country for that reason... No opium either lol

[Esternial]

Create world's greatest beer, as it was written in the holy scriptures.

[FREEaquaticdancelesson]

IF I WAS GOD, I WOULD MAKE IT SO THAT IT WOULDN'T LOG ME OUT IF I SPENT A FUCKING HOUR MAKING UP A WELL THOUGHT OUT POST ONLY SO THAT I COULD LOG BACK IN AND HAVE MY POST PERMANENTLY DELETED.

FUCK.

that is all.

[Arumdaum]

IF I WAS GOD, I WOULD MAKE IT SO THAT IT WOULDN'T LOG ME OUT IF I SPENT A FUCKING HOUR MAKING UP A WELL THOUGHT OUT POST ONLY SO THAT I COULD LOG BACK IN AND HAVE MY POST PERMANENTLY DELETED.

FUCK.

that is all.

Ah, that used to always happen to me.

Sorry about your loss. Now I just randomly look at other threads while making a post.

[Grainne Ni Malley]

IF I WAS GOD, I WOULD MAKE IT SO THAT IT WOULDN'T LOG ME OUT IF I SPENT A FUCKING HOUR MAKING UP A WELL THOUGHT OUT POST ONLY SO THAT I COULD LOG BACK IN AND HAVE MY POST PERMANENTLY DELETED.

FUCK.

that is all.

This is why I have learned to copy any posts I spent way too long trying to research or phrase properly. One too many hard lessons learned.

[Aeternus Audentia]

After further deliberation, I've decided to add the following:

It would be impossible to dub anime; as a result, all anime would be available subtitled in the language of the viewer's choice.

All cookies would be fat and calorie-free while still having their full-intended flavour; no ingredients would be substituted for others.

The Vatican would mysteriously disappear into a massive sink hole, and from it would rise the ruins of Atlantis.

I create multi-dimensional rifts throughout the world. Only those deemed worthy would be able to step in. Everyone else who step through would find themselves in an ironic hell.

I'd make my own Q-Continuum. I would add myself to it so that when the week was up, I'd continue to exist in this state.

Serious question. What is it that makes one worthy, your holiness?

[The Corparation]

After further deliberation, I've decided to add the following:

It would be impossible to dub anime; as a result, all anime would be available subtitled in the language of the viewer's choice.

All cookies would be fat and calorie-free while still having their full-intended flavour; no ingredients would be substituted for others.

The Vatican would mysteriously disappear into a massive sink hole, and from it would rise the ruins of Atlantis.

I create multi-dimensional rifts throughout the world. Only those deemed worthy would be able to step in. Everyone else who step through would find themselves in an ironic hell.

I'd make my own Q-Continuum. I would add myself to it so that when the week was up, I'd continue to exist in this state.

Erase the Vatican? That's crazy. Only the pope and his cardinal's psychic powers are keeping Satan at bay. All will be lost if they fall. And you really would want to go to the Q-continuum? It would suck. There's a reason Q is always messing around with piccard. He's bored as hell.

[Chinese Regions]

Humiliate the evangelists, the pope and other religious leaders; appearing as a loud voice and correcting everything they say. Throw in a couple of lightning strikes etc

[Ifreann]

What kind of pension do I get when the week is over? I'd think that Supreme Overlord of Reality would have a rather generous retirement plan.

I don't feel like reading an old thread, did I get any kind of figure on this?

[Wikkiwallana]

Well, if omniscience didn't already come with the deal I'd will it upon myself, if it did then I would just get straight to it:

First, using my perfect moral knowledge I would devise a system for answering prayers, things like wholly altruistic ones being automatics provided they wouldn't have significant adverse unintended consequences, wholly destructive ones being denied plus possibly consequences for the person making them, and a grading system for sorting out those in between based on content of wish, needfulness, moral character of praying person with a kind eye towards genuine efforts at self improvement, etc. I would then use my perfect programing knowledge to create a program to implement these guidelines for me instead of Bruce's shortsighted "yes to all" decision.

I would then fix permanently all my body's problems, and install a mental on/off switch for my Asperger's, or possibly an intensity dial.

After that, I would visit all the places I've wanted to go, try all the things I've wanted to experience, super-speedread all the books I'm interested in, and play all the videogames I've wanted to play. Possibly simultaneously, since I can be in as many places as I want at once. Afterwards, I would remember all the things that I ever thought about then forget before I could act on, before having some fascinating conversations with the spirits of various historical personages.

Finally, I'd finish out the week with an "all my fetishes come true" party.

[Ashmoria]

So, last night I was watching Bruce Almighty. If you haven't seen it or heard of it, it's basically about a guy named Bruce (Jim Carrey) who thinks he can do God's job better than God, so God bestows his power upon him. Naturally, Bruce goofs off and does things like dividing his soup, walking on water, and making the moon bigger.

This got me thinking: "What would I do if I were God for a week?" Of course, this is if I had to follow the two rules God made with using his power: 1.) You cannot tell anyone that you are God, 2.) You cannot mess with somone's free will.

Well, I'm not too sure how much can be accomplished in just a week, so, I would probably start off with simple "yes" or "no" answers to prayers (as saying yes would automatically make their prayers come true). On some prayers, however, I'm sure yes or no would not be sufficient. I would actually have to change some things so that the prayer is answered, but not always in the way the person who is praying expected. Some prayers I would either leave unanswered or give a no to since people do not always need the help of God for everything, but don't realize it.

I might throw in one or two "natural" disasters, but have no one die, "miraculously", just to force people to work together and have a sense of unity. I might crash a few economies or do the opposite.

Meanwhile, I would patrol streets(I wouldn't need to patrol the streets since I would be just short of omnipotent), enforcing law, all out of sight of anyone major who might be believed or arrest me for insanity. I would be sure to spread goodwill, too. If I did come across some down time, I would be take joy in tasks such as dividing my cereal and milk, making a sun in my hand, swimming on land, and breaking scientific laws in the comfort of my home.

So, what would you do if you were God/Goddess for a week, but had to follow the two rules mentioned above?

god is outside of time. you cant be god for a week. you are either god or not god.

but if i were god and there were one week that i chose to mess with.....

how would i know? im not god and i cant know the implications of the changes so id leave it alone.