[Draft] Repeal Freedom to Seek Medical Care II

[Concrete Slab]

Noting the good intentions of GAR#456

Believing the goal of achieving medical tourism is one we should all strive to achieve.

Noting that, between the previously repealed legislation and the resolution in effect, there is only a singular difference that does little to change to overall faults of the legislation.

Seeing the only change made between the two pieces of General Assembly legislation consist of nations now being able to prohibit the passage of citizens from their country to those of conflict.

Worried that, still, the resolution allows citizens to enter dangerous or war-torn nations, as long as they are not in conflict with the member nation.

Disappointed that, once again, the resolution fails to account for GAR #97, Quality in Health Services, which requires member states to provide a certain level of health coverage to those who cannot afford it, by allowing member nations to place treatment costs on medical tourists.

Concerned the resolution makes no attempt to reduce the risk of widespread epidemics by threatening nations taking in medical tourists that may not be able to quarantine the influx of infected people.

Appalled at the resolution’s harming of individual jurisdiction, with Clause Four making it illegal for member nations to place penalties on tourists, even when certain treatment is illegal under the nation’s laws.

Shocked that, once again, the authoring nation would allow the coding error that appeared in their previous resolution to appear, showing a lack of care from the author and to the high standards of the General Assembly.

Believing the resolution still prioritizes nonresidents over those of domestic citizens.

Hereby repeals GAR#456

[Kenmoria]

“You have ade some very convincing arguments in this repeal, and I daresay I will support it after the necessary drafting period has elapsed. I have no particular comments at this time.”

(OOC: However, you might need to change the ‘Shocked’ clause, as ‘author’ sounds as though you are referring to a player, rather than a nation. I suggest ‘authoring nation’ or ‘authoring delagation’ instead.)

[Iciaros]

"I agree with my learned friend. Cogent points have been made in this proposal, and I would be interested in seeing the repeal succeed. Hopefully the Concrete Slab ambassador is prepared to draft the replacement proposal.

"That said, I would like to suggest a few amendments, simply of style. I would recommend that the "Further noting that" clause addressing the difference between the repealed resolution and the one in force be merged with the next clause, which explains said difference, since they address a similar point. I would also recommend that the first and final lines, referencing GAR#436, be properly punctuated. Finally, I would recommend generally that clauses which do not directly address the flaws in GAR#436, such as "Noting this is the second version..." be removed or shortened, since it would be ideal for the repeal to focus entirely on the merits (or lack thereof) of the target resolution.

"These are the amendments that come to mind presently. I am sure my fellow ambassadors will make more suggestions to further refine this proposal."

[Araraukar]

Believing the resolution still prioritizes nonresidents over those of domestic citizens.

"How the fuck do you get that out of the resolution in question?"

[Concrete Slab]

Edited

[Sierra Lyricalia]

OOC: First, GAR #436 is "Protecting Free Expression."

Second, this entire repeal looks like you copied and pasted a prior repeal and changed just enough verbiage to avoid a plagiarism charge. This is particularly obvious in your GAR #97 clause:

Disappointed that, once again, the resolution fails to account for GAR #97, Quality in Health Services, which requires member states to provide a certain level of health coverage to those who cannot afford it, by allowing member nations to place treatment costs on medical tourists.

Dismayed that the resolution, which allows member states to pass the cost of treatment onto medical tourists under Clause 5, fails to account for GAR#97, Quality in Health Services, which requires member states provide a certain level of health coverage for those who cannot afford it, free of cost;

You're going to have to either get permission to use this language from the author of the original, or drastically retool your sentence structure.

Third, I still think the piece about epidemics and quarantines is an Honest Mistake, but I got overrode last time, so I suppose it's legit.

[Concrete Slab]

OOC: First, GAR #436 is "Protecting Free Expression."

Second, this entire repeal looks like you copied and pasted a prior repeal and changed just enough verbiage to avoid a plagiarism charge. This is particularly obvious in your GAR #97 clause:

Disappointed that, once again, the resolution fails to account for GAR #97, Quality in Health Services, which requires member states to provide a certain level of health coverage to those who cannot afford it, by allowing member nations to place treatment costs on medical tourists.

Dismayed that the resolution, which allows member states to pass the cost of treatment onto medical tourists under Clause 5, fails to account for GAR#97, Quality in Health Services, which requires member states provide a certain level of health coverage for those who cannot afford it, free of cost;

You're going to have to either get permission to use this language from the author of the original, or drastically retool your sentence structure.

Third, I still think the piece about epidemics and quarantines is an Honest Mistake, but I got overrode last time, so I suppose it's legit.

I did get permission to use the previous repeal's arguments. The author only changed one part before resubmitting, so the arguments still work

[Separatist Peoples]

OOC: First, GAR #436 is "Protecting Free Expression."

Second, this entire repeal looks like you copied and pasted a prior repeal and changed just enough verbiage to avoid a plagiarism charge. This is particularly obvious in your GAR #97 clause:

Disappointed that, once again, the resolution fails to account for GAR #97, Quality in Health Services, which requires member states to provide a certain level of health coverage to those who cannot afford it, by allowing member nations to place treatment costs on medical tourists.

You're going to have to either get permission to use this language from the author of the original, or drastically retool your sentence structure.

Third, I still think the piece about epidemics and quarantines is an Honest Mistake, but I got overrode last time, so I suppose it's legit.

I did get permission to use the previous repeal's arguments. The author only changed one part before resubmitting, so the arguments still work

OOC: You're welcome to use my arguments, but not my words. I'm not sure I have any authority over the arguments to begin with, but I make my bread from my writing, and I'm justifiably protective of what I write.

[Concrete Slab]

I did get permission to use the previous repeal's arguments. The author only changed one part before resubmitting, so the arguments still work

OOC: You're welcome to use my arguments, but not my words. I'm not sure I have any authority over the arguments to begin with, but I make my bread from my writing, and I'm justifiably protective of what I write.

So, what are you saying I need to change?

[Arasi Luvasa]

I believe Sep is saying that you need to convert those arguments into your own words. Explain the problems in the way you understand them, not the way Sep does. Basically how do you interpret Seps arguements.

[Separatist Peoples]

I believe Sep is saying that you need to convert those arguments into your own words. Explain the problems in the way you understand them, not the way Sep does. Basically how do you interpret Seps arguements.

Bingo.

[Concrete Slab]

I believe Sep is saying that you need to convert those arguments into your own words. Explain the problems in the way you understand them, not the way Sep does. Basically how do you interpret Seps arguements.

Bingo.

Hmmmm... Time to get to work!!