World Cup 101 - The Roleplays

by **Milchama** » Wed May 27, 2026 9:24 pm

OOC: Background on Tikkun Leil - https://www.myjewishlearning.com/articl ... l-shavuot/ (and yes this is the rare Milchamian RP where a specific IC/OOC framing makes sense) (Also I wrote source 6. Sources 1-5 are either obvious or copy/pasted)

IC:

"What are the sessions?"

"Oh I'm only going to one"

"Which session?"

"The WCC and EWCC as Expressions of Halacha"

"You're not going to stay up later"

"Look, I may, but this is the most important session to see so let's do it"

"Ok then"

*At the session*

"Let's see the source sheet"

Source 1:
The Milchamian Constitution

Lol, I'm not writing a constitutional excerpt here. Here's my favorite part of the US Constitution:
We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.

Source 2:
WCC Constitution

Source 3:
The Beginning of the RP Thread

That said, there are a few caveats to the above 'All's fair' statement ...

Firstly, everyone should remain considerate of their opponent's RP permissions which will (or at least should) be detailed within their roster. Whilst some teams may consider it funny to read of their star striker failing to make an impact upon a match due to being randomly harassed by a bloodthirsty parliament of owls throughout the game, others would most certainly not. Do make yourselves aware of your opponent's permissions and be a good sportsperson by adhering to them. Should you feel someone has deliberately disregarded your permissions in an RP, please feel free to make a post in the World Cup discussion thread, or TG one of the hosts. Repeated, or deliberate ignorance of others permissions will be subject to RP penalties at the discretion of the hosts.
Secondly, whilst there are several topics that may provide key plot-points or events within the grittier of stories. We ask that you aim to keep your RPs around the PG-13 level or, if your narrative deems it necessary to involve or make mention of a topic which veers towards a more mature audience that you include a 'content-warning' or similar such device to forewarn people of such things. If you feel another users RPs are inappropriate, we ask that you detail your reasoning in a post within the World Cup Discussion Thread and we will treat each post on a case-by-case basis. In the event of gross inappropriacy, moderation will be called in.
Thirdly, AI. For all we care, generative AI can go flush itself down a toilet. However, it does still have some uses.
AI images are acceptable as long as they are explicitly labelled as such
AI translation is acceptable as long as the original text is also included for transparency purposes. Here is an example by Huayramarca
AI generated text is not acceptable and explicitly prohibited. Any instance of AI generated text will be met with harsh penalties up to, and including your rank and any accrued RP bonus being set to zero for the remainder of the tournament.
Should you have discovered a new, wacky implementation of AI not mentioned above and wish to know whether it's use would be deemed acceptable, please TG one of the hosts for clarity.

Source 4:

We broke rules?

Source 5:
https://outorah.org/p/6598/ (Sorry for the terrible citation but you can still find it at this link)
Rabbi Jack Abramowitz

Source 6:
The differences between football and cricket

...football has what are called rules while cricket calls them laws. The difference here is obvious, in one there are rules that you can break or bend whereas in the other there are only laws. Laws can be broken but there is a clear punishment for breaking a law, rules can be bent, punishments can change etc. Laws cannot. This has a huge effect on how the game is played...

"That's an interesting selection of sources, not sure what AI has to do with football"

"I don't think it's about AI"

"Shush he's about to start"

"So let's talk about rules for a minute. What's a rule?"

"A rule is a guide"

"Ok and what's a law?"

"A rule that is enforced by the state or a relevant substate authority"

"So what's the difference?"

"Both can be binding but one is much more binding than the other"

"So then let's look at some laws"

"Break into chevruta and talk about what you notice. As a note for our foreign readers, chevruta is a Jewish practice of studying where partners read a text together and then parse it. It is a formal and informal part of Jewish learning that is very important."

*People do chevruta things*

"Cool, now read source 2"

*People do chevruta things with source 2*

"So what do we see as similarities and differences between sources 1 and 2?"

"Weirdly, I think source 2 is more technical?"

"How so?"

"Well you can really read it, unlike Source 1 which seems bizarre and maybe a meme"

"Our Constitution is not a meme! Unlike some other Jewish states we actually wrote one!"

"Well, even so, the excerpt you used was less technical"

"I disagree, it was much more technical. Like the whole source is about how taxation works in a socialist manner. It's pretty complicated stuff, there's a reason we don't really look at that stuff until high school"

"I learned it in 8th grade!"

"Ok, whatever, it's not that much before high school. You learned other parts of the Constitution much earlier, the complicated economic bits are not the part we study earlier in school"

"Fair enough"

"What about the relationship between the two that matters?"

"Look, we have laws and rules here. The WCC has rules and a Constitution but can only mandate so much. It even says, specifically, that hosts may use certain things but not others. It's very clearly not attempting to be all encompassing, just broad enough to be used"

"Alright we're going to skip sources 3 and 4 because of time, let's move to source 5. Go do chevruta things"

*People do chevruta things for source 5*

"What's the relationship between mitzvot here?"

"That just saying something is a rule doesn't make it a rule?"

"Interesting, anybody else"

"I think that it's clear to the Rambam that just saying 'do this' isn't a command, it's just a violation of the command. Like, I know we skipped them, but I read it anyway, for source 3 there is no explicit prohibition in item number 1 but a strong rule against it. It's a rule not a law."

"How does that compare to what we see in sources 1 and 2?"

"What?"

"Ok, everybody looks confused, let me explain a bit more here. Is halacha like Rabbi Abramowitz talking about, more like rules or more like laws?"

"It's literally the Jewish law code, it's clearly laws"

"Why?"

"Because we have to follow them. Why are we at a Tikkun Leil? Because that's the law"

"Tikkun Leil isn't a law, it's a custom"

"Ok, fair enough, but we have to read a specific Torah portion and read Megillat Ruth because those are explicit laws given to us"

"What makes those conceptually binding and not just rules like in Source 2?"

"God and the tradition of being Jews"

"Is that binding?"

"It must be, otherwise we wouldn't do it. There are many aspects of Judaism that aren't done because they are bad, Judaism has laws around slavery that are not followed because we think them immoral. Jewish laws around land ownership are sorta anti socialist and we break them all the time in Milchama but it's necessary otherwise we would never be socialists. They are still binding to us and we can't just change them willy nilly. It's not theological"

"Then why do rabbis write new halachot?"

"Why do parliaments write new laws? Things change or need to be clarified or we need to change things as they see fit"

"Let's look then at soccer now. Go do chevruta things with Source 6"

*People do chevruta things on Source 6*

"What's our connection then to soccer?"

"Basically, we're trying to figure out if the WCC and EWCC are a bunch of rules or laws?"

"Yep"

"What do you think?"

"It's a Jewish seminar, there's no way you're getting a clear answer"

"Fair enough"

1. Parsing of rules as important
2. The question of tradition outside of formal rule making
3. Weird ephemera as a necessary condition to following laws

by **Dantopia** » Thu May 28, 2026 2:19 am

VOL. 46,170

LION CITY, DANTOPIA

THURSDAY 28TH MAY, 2026

₵100

Late Lundgren Winner Sinks Lamenting Lions

Eshialand Win Thrilling Encounter 4-3 With A Dramatic Late Goal From Oliver Lundgren

By SAUL ARNSTEIN

The Eshialand City SuperDome
Eshialand4-3Dantopia
Half Time: 1-1
Davis 39'Hollins 12'
Sandrie 45'Kealoha 76'
Meilling 51'Brunson 78'
Lundgren 90+1'

See also... MD1 | MD2 | MD3 | MD4 | MD5 | MD6 | MD7 | MD8 | MD9 | MD10 | MD11 | MD12 | MD13 | MD14

ESHIALAND CITY, ESHIALAND — Dantopia agonisingly fell to defeat against Eshialand in the World Cup qualifiers, the penultimate away match of the group stages. It was a match that swung back and forth throughout, with the hosts edging it right at the last. The Lions enjoyed a dream start when Nico Hollins opened the scoring after twelve minutes. Not to be undone though, 'the Owls' would fire back through Bradley Davis before half-time and then take the lead instantly upon the resumption of the second half. They would then increase their lead not long after, before Dantopia responded and secured two goals via Johnny Kealoha and Bradini Brunson to tie the affair. However, a crucial seventh goal would be found, and it would be scored by Eshian substitute, Oliver Lundgren, to bring the breathless contest to a close — in favour of the hosts.

An energetic and electric start from the Lions set the tone for a truly pulsating first half of football. A clever back-heel pass from Brunson, after being fed the ball by Hollins, set up the box-crashing Ezra Cunningham for an early shot. Unfortunately for the captain, his effort was blocked by Suzanna Blair and onto Tommy Hopal. Cunningham would insist upon a penalty as the ball appeared to have deflected onto the arm of the latter Eshian defender, but the referee was having none of it on the night. The sustained early pressure on the Eshian goal saw a Kealoha shot draw the first save out of Harry Bruske. A cute side-footed effort from Taramaia aimed at the bottom corner was also saved, as the chances came thick and fast for the visitors.

Nico Hollins

Then, Rick Bishop's men were finally rewarded for their strong start with an opener in the twelfth minute of play. A teasing cross whipped in from the left by Taramaia only managed to ruffle the hair of Bradini Brunson, before Bruske parried. However, the keeper didn't make clean contact and so the ball bobbled up perfectly for Nico Hollins to nod it home, mere inches from goal. A speedy check from the video assistant referees confirmed that Hollins was, crucially, onside. This was the ideal start for Dantopia, who simply had to win this match to help cement one of two automatic qualification spots out of Group 4.

The first half would continue to progress the Lions' way, with Hollins, Brunson, Taramaia and Kealoha, in particular, all linking up well, and forcing stellar defensive efforts from the Eshian back line to keep them all at bay. Among the further efforts on goal, Bruske managed to get a tip to a stunning volleyed effort from Brunson. Kealoha found space on the turn just behind the attackers and played a lofted ball over to the onrushing Brunson, who's acrobatic leap helped him meet the flight of the ball perfectly, only to be denied by an excellent stop from the Eshian number one. It would have been one of the goals of the campaign, had it gone in.

Eshialand threatened the Dantopian defensive line just before the half-hour mark of the match. A header from Dax Young at the far post was denied by a point-blank save from Akana following a corner for the hosts. However, the effort only emboldened the Owls, because less than ten minutes later, an equaliser would be found. A successful high press from the Eshians on their left-hand side dispossessed Nico Hollins. The ball was then played into Bradley Davis, who had space on the flank to drive into. He found his way towards the box and then unleashed a low-driven shot across goal that ricocheted in off the far post, just past the fingertips of an outstretched Winston Akana.

The Dantopian number one would save a deflected Meilling effort which, again, looked destined for that bottom right corner, before Kai Watanabe had an almost perfect chance to help the Lions take a lead into the break. A corner whipped in by Kealoha from the left found Watanabe open at the back post to guide it towards goal, but a flying leap from Keiar Forsen prevented the ball from crossing the line, before it was hooked safely away by Lily Cromlin. The look of disbelief on Watanabe's face said it all, as he had surely thought he had just scored his first goal for the national team. The scores would instead remain level-headed into the break.

However, this wouldn't remain the case for long following the restart as, almost instantly, the Owls carved open the Dantopians with a line-breaking pass from Meilling leaving Will Sandrie through on goal. The 23-year-old forward would calmly slip the ball past an apoplectic Akana, who was evidently frustrated with how asleep his entire outfield had been at the start of play in the second period. Lucas Meilling then put the hosts firmly in the driver's seat with a free kick from just outside the penalty area. The Owls captain would bypass the Dantopian wall and place his shot into the bottom corner of the goal, with the goalie unable to do anything about it.

Johnny Kealoha

This very well could have been a deflating moment for the Lions, who's dream start had been thoroughly overturned. However, sensing the desperation for even just a point from the affair, a resolute front line spurred the side on. Jeremiah Taramaia had a rather unorthodox cross-come-shot barely tipped over the bar, after the Lion City FC player's attempt from a narrow angle almost got the better of Bruske in net. Then, with just over fifteen minutes left to play, the Lions would appeal for another penalty. Kealoha's shot from outside the box struck the arm of Lily Cromlin at close quarters, who was standing on the line of the penalty area. It was one of those decisions that had to be picked over with a fine-tooth comb by the video assistants. Was Cromlin inside the area or outside? The latter would be the final verdict, and the Dantopians were awarded a free kick instead.

Bradini Brunson

It was no matter for Johnny Kealoha though, as he curled the ball stunningly into the top right-hand corner of the goal. 3-2, game on — the Lions had something to fight for. Not two minutes later, the away crowd would cheer on an equalising effort. The move started and finished with Brunson, who's header won the Dantopians the ball back, and allowed Kealoha to play in substitute Zaïre Thomas down the left-hand side. The winger's initial ball back in was cut out but not cleared, allowing Brunson to seize control of the ball and finish past Bruske. A fist pump towards the away crowd was followed by a kissing of the Dantopian crest. This was a huge moment for Dantopia's automatic qualifying odds.

However, it wouldn't be the final goal of the evening. Within the first minute of the added seven of injury time, Eshialand would stick the dagger into the hearts of the Dantopian fans. A spirited drive through the middle of the park by substitute full-back Zane Quinn had the Dantopian defenders scrambling, the 21-year-old full of pep off the bench against tiring legs. He would cleverly slide the ball towards fellow substitute Oliver Lundgren, who had enough space to turn and strike the ball towards goal, finding the bottom corner low to Akana's right-hand side. This was the definitive, deflating moment for the Dantopian side, who had fought back well from 3-1 down, but now found themselves in a hole again, with precious few minutes left to play.

An end-to-end finish saw a swift counter from the Lions result in a missed opportunity for Brunson, as he could barely reach the ball after it was played in by Kealoha. At the other end, Akana pulled off an excellent diving save to keep out an effort from substitute Zara Plarei. The Vna-Chuhul Ravens goalkeeper would then more comfortably collect another attempt from Davis, before launching a final ball over the top towards Edwards, who managed to poke it into the path of Zaïre Thomas at speed. The Dartford Oilers winger would agonisingly miss his chance to level the scores, sending the ball mere centimetres the wrong side of the far post. The referee would blow for full-time, 4-3 being the result. This was a huge win for Eshialand, and the home crowd was justifiably jubilant.

Group 4 World Cup 101 Qualifying Round
POSNATIONPWDLGFGAGDPTS
1  Tanirinthia       15   9   3   3   32   22   +10   30
2  Dantopia          15   8   5   2   37   22   +15   29
3  Eshialand         15   9   0   6   31   23   +8   27
4  Auprussia         15   6   4   5   24   18   +6   22
5  Lisander          15   7   1   7   29   28   +1   22
6  Saperetia         15   5   5   5   20   18   +2   20
7  Sudilia           15   6   1   8   24   32   -8   19
8  Xanneria          15   4   4   7   20   32   -12   16
9  Allamunnic States 15   3   4   8   17   27   -10   13
10  Gwarkos           15   2   5   8   10   22   -12   11

The loss leaves the Lions in second, with Tanirinthia's 1-1 draw with Saperetia being enough for 'the Jackalopes' to take the top spot. It's the Tanirinthians who Dantopia face next, in a nail-biting match-up at the top of the table. With Eshialand just two points off the Lions in third, and fixtures against Xanneria, the Allamunic States and Sudilia, the Owls have a good chance of catching up and even overtaking Rick Bishop's side before the end of the qualifying fixtures in Group 4. The gap to 4th and 5th placed Auprussia and Lisander gives some hope to the Dantopian national team that even with a poor result against Tanirinthia, a third-place finish wouldn't be the worst outcome, though it still comes with the risk of play-off round fixtures, where anything can happen.

The national team manager has guided the side admirably through qualifying, and overachieved expectations, to the point where national team fans had pinned their hopes on automatic qualification. With this still very much in limbo, it should be noted that merely doing this well in the group stages should be cause for optimism in Dantopian footballing circles. However, falling short at the final hurdle would still hurt, and the prevailing view of many Dantopian football fans is that this will unfortunately happen, such is the rampant pessimism and self-deprecation amongst the fanbase. Getting the other side of the Tanirinthia match with a positive result may be the only cure.

xg.unit
1d

Eshialand (1.98) 4-3 (3.86) Dantopia #ESHvsDAN #WorldCup101 #Qualifying #Group4

OOC DISCLAIMER: The likenesses of players and managers have been created with the help of generative AI. Every other image in this RP was completely hand-made.

by **Calgasia** » Thu May 28, 2026 8:16 am

KLEINE BÖHMEN
A traveller's guide to Calgasia

This is one of the most important regions in economical, scientifical, cultural but mostly historical terms, and is the heart of the Czech-origin community of Calgasia. In 1920, the government tried to impose German as the sole language of instruction in schools, leaving Hungarian for selected schools and getting rid of the Czech language completely, although Bohemian colonists were promised that they would be able to keep their language as well as their Czech culture. The answer was the Czech Revolt of 1920, when this population started a general strike and numerous protests and demonstrations to demand the government to fulfill its promises. They were increasingly supported by Hungarians and working-class Austrians that saw this as an injustice from the aristocrats, the landowners and the powerful over them, and were afraid that after Czechs, they would be the target of the government. The cabinet tried to finish the protests harshly, and there were even some deaths among the rioters, but at the end the resilience of the Czech people and their working-class allies was enduring and impressive, and the Kaiser, alarmed by the menace of a full-scale uprising, changed the cabinet, who was forced to grant back the language rights as well as allowing Czechs to establish their own region, south of Goldstadt.

Those Bohemian settlers moved down the river Mel and founded Melperk, its university and the rest of the cities and towns that fill the landscape. The name of the region? Little Bohemia, Kleine Böhmen. After almost a hundred years of the tragic events of 1920, Kleine Böhmen is entirely Calgasian and entirely Czech, blending the traditions from the Old World with the pride of being a fundamental part of the young nation.

The Land
Kleine Böhmen occupies the south-central part of Calgasia, between Inner Calgas to the north, Ober Calgas to the west, the Alföld to the east, and the Meeresregion to the south. It is a hilly region, with valleys and great forests, without as many mountains as in the previous regions.

The River Mel flows from the northwest, after passing through Ober Calgas, and joins its principal tributary, the Mohúsova, near Melperk. The Mohúsova goes through much of the region, including Bohunice and several smaller settlements before the confluence. The river valleys are fertile and cultivated, and the hills between them have thick forests, and the northern and western regions have mountains, although they cannot be compared to those in the Calgas regions. Below the surface, Kleine Böhmen has an extraordinary mineral wealth, iron, coal, copper, and deposits of other materials that have fuelled their economy since its early days.

The climate is milder than in the Calgas regions, with cold winters, warm summers and rainy springs and autumns, pretty much a standard moderate climate. In spring, the fields bloom with numerous flowers, while in autumn, the thick forests turn into auburn and gold from the leaves of the trees. People here speak Czech in the daily life, with a unique Calgasian accent. Of course German language is understood and spoken by virtually everyone, but if the visitor makes the effort and speaks Czech, even some basic, broken phrases, the effect on the locals will be way better than if German is used.

Melperk
Melperk sits near the confluence of the Mel and the Mohúsova,the two big rivers of the region, and has always been a main academical, scientifical and cultural city. It is the oldest city in Kleine Böhmen, the regional capital, and perhaps even the intellectual centre of the country, much to the dismay of Goldstadt inhabitants.
The reason is the Charles University of Melperk, or Univerzita Karlova, founded in 1920 immediately after the settlement of this place by intellectuals who had left Goldstadt after the Czech Revolt, and named to honour the homonymous university in Prague, the oldest in Central Europe. The Karolinium is the central campus, that occupies a substantial portion of the city. The different faculties, schools, rooms and labs are built around courtyards, where the students often sit and chat between classes, especially in spring. The Charles University is considered the best academical institution in Calgasia, ranked first consistently year after year. Its strongest areas are medicine, biochemistry, applied sciences, law and economy, and it has the highest research output of any institution in the country. Due to its prowess in biochemistry and medicine, a cluster of biotech and pharma companies has grown in the city, boosting its industrial base and GDP and providing numerous jobs for the alumni. The influence of this university over the Calgasian life is invaluable: politicians, intellectuals, businessmen, writers, lawyers, scientists… the Charles University truly develops the talent of this nation.

But Melperk is way more than a campus. The city centre, built in a centroeuropean and neobaroque style, mimicking the city of Prague, is lovely to walk, around the Staré Náměstí, the market square. The cafés around the Husova street are worth a visit, and do not miss the Kolkovna restaurant, near the post office in the Vodičkova street, where local dishes like svíčková, or vepřo knedlo zelo are a must. When the sun sets, the Letnová area is always busy, filled with university students and young people. Try the Metronom bar to have a taste of different spirits, wines and beers.

Bohunice
Melperk thinks, Bohunice builds. Let’s be honest, the second city of Kleine Böhmen is not beautiful compared to Melperk or Goldstadt, but it is fundamental for the national economy, as it is the industrial engine of Calgasia along Wels. Steel, vehicles, chemicals, machinery, manufacturing… Where others have towers and even skyscrapers, Bohunice has chimneys.

The hard working people here have an immense pride in their work and their factories, and usually have a strong personality, and are very involved in the community and the local politics. Of course the city has a leftist atmosphere, being a Social Democrat stronghold for decades. Bohunice has seen numerous strikes over the years, especially in the Glorious Revolution of 1965 that definitely brought full democracy to Calgasia, where the workers demonstrated and performed strikes against the government, often clashing with police forces. The atmosphere now is of course much calmer, but the ideas of class struggle and organized labour unions are very much alive. Apart from the politics, the people here tend to be very communal, and friendlier compared to much of the country.

The rest of the region
Lílov is south of Bohunice, along the Mohúsova valley, is a small city focused on light industry like fruit jams, and services, but it was built in a central european style, making it one of the most visited towns in the country. Its cathedral is considered a national monument, and there are numerous fields of lilies around the city that give Lílov its name and are a touristic sight. Additionally, the Berka Palace and the National Theater are also interesting sights.

Stráznice is the glass and crystal capital of Kleine Böhmen, a tradition brought from the old Bohemia by the Czech settlers, who started the glass industry. There is a museum which displays artistic glass pieces. Towns like Mlýnska, Hová Kinský and Nové Březy have a quieter, rural feel but are worth a visit in summer during their harvest festivals. Dianú, to the south, also has a great deal of monuments for modern architecture lovers, with its modern city hall and its arts museum, and is near the Petrýnska forest, which is very spectacular in autumn.

Beer, the local religion
We cannot talk about Kleine Böhmen without mentioning beer. The region is home to several breweries, with a strong tradition brought by the Czech colonists from their ancestral lands. Melperk produces two of the finest beers in Calgasia. Zlatý Lev, or “Golden Lion” is the more traditional one, brewed since 1924 and the best selling beer in the country. Its rival, Královské, or “Royal”, is the smaller sibling, with less sales in Calgasia but with a strong growth in the Multiverse. Both are available on tap throughout the region, and there is the constant argument about which one is better.
Bohunice takes pride in its own beer, Zvonek, which is very valued across the region but is it not that popular outside Kleine Böhmen, and Breziner from Nové Březy, which is widely consumed across the country.

Sport
Kleine Böhmen’s sporting record is, frankly, absurd. The region boasts more than 90 titles in the major sports across its different teams, only rivalled by the larger and more populated Innere Calgas capital region. The fans here tend to be more cheerful and joyous compared to most of the country, which definitely irritates more “calmer” fandoms, that tend to see the Böhmische fans as “loud”.

In football, there are two titans. Melperk SV has 12 Bundesliga titles, the second most in the league. They play in the Olympiská stadium and have a joyful and loud atmosphere. The club is famous for its training fields and youth system, and is one of the best football academies in all of the country, producing young talent like star striker Jan Novák or playmaker Sedlácek in recent years.
We have to mention their big rivals as well, Bohunice FC. Traditionally an underdog, the arrival of former player Karel Polásek as a manager five years ago completely revolutionized the club, installing a gegenpressing, offensive style that has led to three Bundesliga titles to reach 10 titles in total. The faithful, passionate Bohunice fans started to revere him as something more than a manager, as a Prophet, hence his nickname. Of course, his calm, intellectual style in the press conferences has aided him to have this mystical atmosphere around him.

Hockey is of utmost importance in Kleine Böhmen as well, and the majority of the players of the EisLiga, the ice hockey league, coming from this region. Needless to say, the two most successful teams come from here, both with 16 titles. Melperk Löwen is the old champion, having won multiple titles in the past but with harder times in recent years. They see the rise of their rivals with a certain distress, as it is very painful to see how your historical dominance is being eroded slowly but constantly. With their last title ten years ago, the fans are impatient to see the “Lions” where they rightfully deserve. Bohunice EH is the up-and-coming rival, whose captain, Katharina Bohm, is considered the best hockey player ever in Calgasia. Bohm, 26, has led the team to win five titles in the recent years, missing only once the finals since she joined at 18 years old. She was originally born in Goldstadt, and went through the youth system of the Goldstadt SK, but was rejected because she “was not fit enough, was not technical enough”. That decision proved to be the worst decision ever in Calgasian sport, and cemented the rise of Bohunice EH.
Additionally, HC Lílov has won the EisLiga seven times, and also has a very powerful youth system, with players like Johannes Lindner or Dalibor Sedivý, now stars in the league, that started their careers for the “lilies”.

In water polo, the other big sport in Calgasia, we find the Charles University WC, the team associated with the university. The team has won the Wasserball Liga 22 times, and usually develops young talent, with some students being part of the squad. Bohunice WC has won the league 5 times, and is the home of the legend Hans Steijn, who led Calgasia to their first ever olympic medial, the men’s water polo bronze in the 18th Olympics.

The region has also produced talent in other sports, especially cycling, with Jana Kopecková being the current gold medal in women’s road race, and canoeing, with the Nemecký sisters, Isabella and Sara, silver medal in Women's C2 500m, and Hedvika Navratilová, gold medal in Biathlon 10 km pursuit.

by **Masraya** » Thu May 28, 2026 8:29 am

The Straits Press

180 Minutes Away From the World Cup
By Ahmad Nazri Rahman, Senior Football Correspondent

There was no reason for anyone outside of Mandalanusa to care about Masraya when the 101st World Cup qualifying draw was first announced.

We came into the campaign completely unranked. Not even a single highlight of the Masraya national team was up on the internet. We came into the campaign as one of the biggest unknowns in world football. Even within Mandalanusa itself, not many people knew about us. Unlike Serumpun, we didn't participate in the Baptism of Fire prior to the campaign. And unlike Bhumi Matawis Empire, Biyambi, Eraman and Sharktail, we had never participated in any international football tournament before, be it the World Cup, the CMFA Mandalanusa Cup or any other cup.

In fact, even some Masrayan don't care at first. Especially after watching Serumpun fail miserably in the Baptism of Fire, the only benchmark Masraya has, as Serumpun plays in the same domestic league as Masraya. If Serumpun who dominates the Masrayan league fails on the international stage, surely Masraya will fail miserably too. That was what most people thought at the start. Then when the draw placed us into Group 10 alongside footballing nations such as Tikariot, Kanzlia and The Holy Empire, almost everyone thought we would finish last.

The opening away match against Bongo Johnson offered the first real glimpse into what Masraya actually was. And surprisingly, the players were calm and composed. We won 3-1 in our first ever international match. Those results gave us a little bit of confidence. The following draw away to the United States of Devonta boosted that confidence more. A win and a draw from two away matches. For most nations, that was nothing to shout for. But for us, especially after watching Serumpun lose 5 successive matches at the same time, it was a huge sigh of relief.

We then played our third match at home, our first home match ever. It was the match that changed everything as we beat The Holy Empire 3-1. Even now months after the match, we still find it hard to believe that we beat them. Even though we played against shoggoths in that match, they are still representing the Holy Empire, therefore supposed to be good. They qualified automatically in the end proving that they are good hence why before the match, everyone thought it was going to be a routine away win for the Holy Empire. Instead, we overwhelmed them.

Ninety thousand fans inside the Masraya National Stadium in our first ever home match. We managed to create a hostile environment for the away side from the get go. The newly formed Ultras Masraya with their giant tifo behind the goalpost was such an intimidating figure whenever we have a home match. Everyone was shocked when Ultras Masraya revealed their first giant tifo before the match showing a massive dead shoggoth impaled by our striker, Azman Ariffin using a spear as if foreshadowing the match where Azman Ariffin scored a hattrick against the shoggoths.

And that was how it continued throughout the campaign. At half way point in the campaign, it became obvious that nobody wanted to play in Masraya. We managed to turn Masraya National Stadium into a fortress. We eventually won 6 of our 8 home matches scoring 25 goals. Only Kanzlia managed to leave with three points from Kuala Titiwangsa. Everybody else suffered, including the Holy Empire. We even scored 5 past Gyaromia, Shin-Zetsubo and Bongo Johnson at home.

But away from home? That's a whole different story. Our away record probably explained why we failed to qualify directly for the World Cup. While we stayed true to our mascot, the Masrayan tiger while playing at home, outside of Masraya, we were merely house cats. The irony is that we played in our traditional red and yellow at home while donning our black and yellow tiger stripes away from home.

While playing with our black and yellow stripes, we only managed to get 2 victories and 10 goals in 8 matches. Without the support, our players simply became toothless. It was hard to understand really. One day we scored past 5 against Gyaromia and Shin-Zetsubo then the next day we completely forgot how to play football in Jeckland. Yes, even bottom teams like Jeckland and the United States of Devonta managed to take away points from us when we are not playing in front of our own crowd.

Nevertheless, in the end, carried by our home records, we still managed to finish 3rd, only behind Kanzlia and The Holy Empire and above Myrtle Beach, Shin-Zetsubo, Gyaromia, United States of Devonta, Jeckland and Bongo Johnson, enough to get a spot in the 3rd round of the playoff. Nobody expected that at the start. We were frustrated that we didn't beat Jeckland and the United States of Devonta away now, but at the start of the campaign, if we were offered a point each for those fixtures, we would have taken it. And honestly, looking back now, no matter what happened in the playoffs, it is hard to call this campaign anything other than a success.

No one would have believed you if you told them that Masraya would be 180 minutes away from the World Cup a year ago. Yet, here we are. Only Airannia standing in our way, the team that was eliminated at the same stage on their debut in the previous World Cup qualifiers.

Airannia is new to the international stage as well. Not as new as us who are making our debut but still pretty new. This is only their 2nd ever participation in the World Cup qualifiers. On their debut, they won 12 of their 16 group matches, only losing twice. That alone was enough to make everyone notice them. If the format in the previous qualifier allowed the top 2 to qualify like the current format, they would have qualified for the World Cup already as they finished second in the group. But no, the previous qualifier only allocates one automatic spot from each group, hence putting Airannia in the playoff round where they lose to Zenic in the final hurdle.

This time around, they again impressed everyone. Up until the 14th match during the group stage, they were still 2nd in the group, occupying an automatic qualification spot with 4 more matches left to be played having only lost twice after 14 matches. They were even only 2 points behind the group leader, Crpostran at that moment. Everything looked good for them. But then failure to win a single match in their next 3 matches left them having to be satisfied with another playoff finish after finishing third in the group.

Airannia is not some old footballing empire like the Holy Empire. They are not a regional powerhouse like Kanzlia either. Just like Masraya, they are still trying to establish themselves on the international stage. Both sides don't really fears the other and both sides know this is probably the biggest opportunity they will ever get. And because of that, nobody really knows how these two matches will go. What we do know is Airannia is definitely not weak. But at the same time, Masraya has also earned the right to believe.

And now the entire country is counting down the days until the kickoff against Airannia.

by **Biyambi** » Thu May 28, 2026 9:56 am

Oramisirian Empire

Following Winchi’s withdraw, a committee of Oramisiri nobles approached Umaji and invited him to assume the title of Wene (Sovereign). The offer troubled Umaji. Rather than accept immediately, he sought divine guidance and travelled to the foot of the sacred mountain of Namuli,a place long believed to lie beyond mortal reach. There he consulted the renowned diviner Oddiva. Oddiva revealed to Umaji that he was of divine lineage, descended from Orami, the primordial spirit and founder of Oramisiri.

On 26 January 501 CE, Oddiva convened a great assembly at the foot of Mount Namuli. Present were the Aeperi leaders, the nobles of Oramisri, and the eight Ashulupali who had defected from the Vatato. Before the gathered multitude, Oddiva proclaimed Umaji’s lineage and divine claim.

When questioned about the truth of this revelation, tradition holds that Umaji, filled with the wisdom and authority of Orami rose and issued a challenge. He declared that he would ascend Mount Namuli, from which no mortal had ever returned, and bring back Orami’s Nivaka, the sacred spear that had struck down Napolo in the Ikoto yo Mikoto, as proof of his ancestry.

Despite attempts by officers and companions to dissuade him, Umaji begun his ascent of the mountain. Vanishing into the mist and clouds of the treacherous mountain.

At dawn on the fourth day, those gathered below witnessed a miracle. A red falcon descended from the heights of Namuli, carrying in its talons a steel nivaka. The falcon landed among the multitude and, before their eyes transformed into Umaji Ziwana, holding Orami’s spear.

Umajiwara (501 – 530 CE) *Wara mean Great.

Umaji then made a sacred alliance with everyone present, they anointed him, and he became Wene of the Oramisiri. Umaji was 48 years old when he became Wene, and he ruled for 27 years.

When Winchi Munllo heard that Umaji had been made Wene of Oramisiri, he declared himself Wene of the territories of the Ilundazi, Bazimba, Batukuvia, Batanga, Balupe, and Bayuku and over all of Oramisiri.

Umaji’s Great Oramisirian Civil War would rage for the next seven years. In 508 CE, the two armies would meet at the Battle of Vaunethi, were Winchi’s huge army were crushed by Umaji’s experienced mikotorutu.

After the battle, Winchi retreated to the north, hoping to raise more men to fight Umaji. Whilst sleeping in the city of Vellimatelo at an inn, the Ashulupali Uwela and Mattukulo slipped in. Once inside, they went to where Winchi lay asleep and killed him. They cut his head and run off to present it to Wene Umaji at Ttimutu as a gift. When Umaji found out their betrayal of Winchi, he was disgusted and ordered his amirawo (soldiers) to kill Uwela and Mattukulo, and cut off their heads, hands, and feet, which they hung up at Ttimutu. Wene Umaji then ordered Winchi Munllo’ head to be buried back home in the city of Oramisiri, and for there to be a week of mourning for his fallen comrade. This action gained Wene Umaji favour among members of the Inupa yo Munllo and some of the rebellious Ashulupali and they surrendered to Wene Umaji. After the week of mourning, Wene Umaji led his mikotorutu into Ilundazi were the last of the Ashulupalican armies were based. After months of battle Wene Umaji Ziwana was victorious defeating the last of the Ashulupalican armies.

In the aftermath Umaji dutifully administered his newly reunited realm. He divided his territories into semi-autonomous provinces known as wesha’s and where governed by awehereri (stewards) drawn initially from Oramisirians. Awemelela (superintendents) were sent to supervise these lesser rulers, and Umaji’s greatest mikotorutu, the Anamrere and the Mavepe were instituted as his royal guard under one Ikotorutu named the Wazimba.

Wene Umaji then turned to the traitors, those who had surrendered to him where pardoned and even Winchikana Munllo, the son of the late Winchi Munllo made a Mwehereri over the province of Ukotokwa. The ones who never surrendered were executed, their wealth seized, and their families sold into slavery.

In 519 CE, Umaji’s attention turned towards a great power in the north, the Ttipetan Empire. The current Ttipetan Chiban’gombe (Emperor), Khute was not a good ruler. Khute had diverted funding away from the rainmaking order leading to a drought in the land, and neglected the common people. Discontent was rife and loyalty to Chiban’gombe and his son Mchepera was at an all-time low. Umaji as descendant of Orami saw himself as ruler of the atuttipiya (People of the Knowledge), which included, the Oramisiri, the Aeperi, the Ajomboka, and the Azilondo, he saw it fit for him to intervene. Oramisirian spies in Ttipeta begun spreading word throughout Khute’s empire that Umaji intended to end Khute’s reign of terror and restore the rainmaking cult in Ttipeta. In 521 CE, Umaji dispatched his army towards Ttipeta. After two years of war, the decisive engagement in the war would come near the city of Bangome on the Livulezi River. Bangome was a strategic city guarding the imperial capital and holy city of Namitete. When Umaji and his mikotorutu arrived at the city, he defeated the Ttipetan army with ease. The road to Namitete now lay open. Namitete was one of the most heavily fortified cities in Ziwana at the time. Umaji would lay a siege on the city of Namitete for 6 months. On 11 June 524 CE, a great festival was being held in Namitete. A drunk guard left one of the small gates into the city open allowing Umaji’s troops to sneak into the city. The half-drunk defenders were caught off-guard and were unable to put up any meaningful resistance. By dawn, Chiban’gombe Khute and his son Mchepera were dead, and Namitete’s main gate stood open. On 12 June 524 CE, Umaji entered Namitete to a rapturous welcome. The nobles of the city swore loyalty to him, thus Ttipeta was officially annexed into the Oramisirian Empire.

Following the Oramisirian annexation of Ttipeta, Wene Umajiwara would spend the last years of his reign stabilising his Empire and laying the building blocks that would provide a strong foundation for centuries of prosperous rule. Wene Umajiwara would die in his bed in 530 CE, and was succeeded by his son, Nairuwa II Ziwana.

by **City of Myrtle Beach** » Thu May 28, 2026 11:02 am

Continuing from this post

The next morning, the National Assembly was called into an emergency session while half the country protested outside of the building. Evidently broadcasting the opening of the portal to the entire country was not a great idea, even though all of the strategists said it would be "a massive boost for re-election odds." Perhaps they were talking about the opposition. But, it happened, and now Lindsay Griffin, the First Minister of Myrtle Beach, had to deal with the consequences of his actions. Well... not necessarily. Before walking onto the assembly floor to make his speech, he had one last meeting with his (new) strategist.

"Deflect, deflect, deflect," he said. "You had nothing to do with this. Make sure you talk about the poor safety practices exercised by the contractor. Blame the opposition for refusing to put money into the project. Blame the terrorists, or something. Just make sure you don't mention, in any way, that it could possibly, at all, be your fault. And most importantly, do not apologize."

With that pep talk, Griffin walked onto the floor, welcomed by a cacophony of boos and jeers from both the government and the opposition. He was so fucked. Maybe he could start a podcast. He certainly would have to if he wanted to keep his status once he becomes forced to resign or is pushed out in a motion of no confidence. He wouldn't have to worry about that if he could knock this speech out of the park, though! Walking up to the podium, he knew what he had written in haste was all wrong. He needed a better speech to truly win these people. Just wing it, he thought. It would be fine.

After standing at the podium in silence for a minute, he began his speech. "Some... 'people'... in this room... wish to weaponize this tragedy for their own gain. Some people in this room wish to manipulate the anguish of the Myrtle Beachian people to make political moves. I will not stand for that abuse of our country. There will be a change into the future, but change keeps our beautiful country healthy as it has--"

In the middle of Griffin's speech, a man burst into the hall and ran onto the assembly floor. The security handled him just weakly enough for him to burst out of their hold, and he ran towards Griffin. He yelled, "This is for my father!" and punched Griffin directly in the face. After that he was taken away by security, to the applause of the assembly members. Later that day, they passed a motion of no confidence, removing Griffin as First Minister. Right before he was removed, though, he called for snap elections. So, a new First Minister was to be selected, and a new National Assembly was to be elected in January.

by **Paradystopia** » Thu May 28, 2026 1:59 pm

CUT-OFF FOR PLAYOFFS ROUND 2 - BRACKETS A-G

by **The Martian Independent Republic** » Thu May 28, 2026 6:08 pm

Stepping off the boat was a bit rocky for Amin, losing his balance at first, but he got there in the end. Immediately after he had steadied himself, there was the Governor here to meet him.

"Welcome to Lahaira, Prime Minister Amin! I hope your trip went well." Governor Olayeva's hands moved rapidly as she gestured for the Martians to disembark the ferry.
"Well, I'll just say I'm glad that we're here to discuss improvements to it, among other things."
"You couldn't be more right about that, Aleirave's connections to the outside world aren't exactly known for their speed. They have been getting better over the past couple years, though - taking the ferry to Eshialand a decade ago was even worse than it is now." Olayeva gave a knowing nod.
"Considering the state it's in now, I can't even imagine."

Amin and Olayeva stood there at the docks, waiting for the Eshians to arrive on their own ferry - the Aleiravan and the Martian had come to an agreement that because they would need to meet the king at the docks when he arrived, and that his ferry was going to come sometime between 20 minutes and 2 hours from now, there wasn't much point in leaving. Besides, the weather was great - a bit cold for Aleirave this time of year, but then again that's still very warm by Martian standards.

Clack, clack, clack, Olayeva tapped her shoe as she stood there, looking out as if the boat could come into sight at any minute. "Before we start the meeting, what, broadly, do you want out of it?"
"Faster ferries, to be honest. And more reliable ones. It's not like we need an airport."
"Okay, so we're on the same page. That's good." Olayeva turned a bit to face Amin, only to turn back when she heard the cry of "Ship!" coming from someone at the docks. Given the number of ships that came into Lahaira every day, she had a pretty good idea of who could be on it. "And that'll be Will."

The dinner was far more formal than either Olayeva or any of the Martians were accustomed to, only King William seeming like this was natural for him. It was clear all the stops had been pulled out.
"So, what's in this?"
Olayeva stared at him blankly. "Well, fish, of course."
"Oh, that makes sense. We don't get that on Mars."
Olayeva stopped staring so blankly, realizing that that question was reasonable coming from him. "In any case, onto business."
"So, what do you need from me?" King William was happy to contribute, clearly having a lot of ideas.
"Faster ferries." Olayeva was quick to respond.
"What Governor Olayeva said."
"Please, call me Katya."
"What Katya said, then. Also, more reliable ferries. Service is cancelled too often as it is."
"I've seen a pattern with that, actually. The service tends to be cancelled when it's leaving the MIR, because there's no repair facility there." Katya responded.
"Okay, we can build one there. That seems good. For faster ferries, we can add another one and improve the rotation." King William chimed in.
"Also, I'd appreciate it if the schedule was standardized - a lot of Martians have to wait for 12 hours to leave Aleirave."
"We can do that, too. You sure that's all you need? We could probably get you an airport from what used to be Union Stadium." King William inquired.
"Will, even if you combined the population of the MIR and Aleirave, you wouldn't be close to having a million people. There's just not a market for that." Katya shot back.
"I appreciate the sentiment, but we need things that are realistic and financially reasonable." Amin agreed.
"That's understandable."
"So, it's settled, then? We build a repair facility in Martian Anaia to go alongside the current one in Aleirave, we add another ferry to the rotation serving whichever route needs it more, we upgrade the ferries we currently have, and we standardize the schedule so people aren't stuck waiting for 12 hours?" Amin had a final proposal.
"Yes, that sounds good." Olayeva nodded.
"If it works for you and it works for Katya, then it works for me." the king said, looking between Amin and Olayeva, then at the various ministers on the other side of the table. With nods all around the table, he went back to working on his fish.

When they finished their dinner, Amin and his compatriots hurried to the docks, having learned that the ferry was leaving later and that they might be able to get on, only to see the ship leaving Lahaira as they arrived.

"Well, I can certainly see an improvement that needs to be made."

by **Kamijiro** » Thu May 28, 2026 7:10 pm

WC101: The Jirini Last Stand

Two weeks have passed since New Imperia's fall.
Two weeks of rain. Two weeks of shots in the dark.
Two weeks of death.
The Parliamentary Forces were under the impression that the Jirini were going to fight fair.
That was never really on the table.

Home-made spike traps.
Molotovs from leftover gasoline.
A mysterious crate of explosives that somehow ended up in the hands of the Jirini forces.
Two weeks of guerrila warfare being fought by an empire that died years ago and simply lost the ability to fight.
Two weeks of Jirinho winning.

And then finally,
Finally, the citizens of Kamijiro said: "that's enough, those are our countrymen you're after."
And Parliament finally ceded the point.
The troops withdrew.
The Jirini rejoiced.

Parliament allowed Jirinho a seat at their table.
Jirinho sent their representatives - the very same ones who'd signed their death warrants just weeks ago.
And the system stayed intact. Just with new chairs and new desks and new people to focus on.
But Jirinho's problems would have voices now.
Never again would they be relegated to the side where those without power go.

The final tally?
Parliamentary Forces lost 719 troops. Men. Fathers. Brothers. Sons.
The Jirini lost 297 citizens. Also men, fathers, brothers and sons.
These are the tolls that people forget about in the bigger picture.
Such is war. Such is life.

Viva la Jirini.

by **Farfadillis** » Thu May 28, 2026 7:15 pm

CUT-OFF FOR PLAYOFFS ROUND 2 - BRACKETS H-L

by **Dantopia** » Fri May 29, 2026 3:06 am

VOL. 46,171

LION CITY, DANTOPIA

FRIDAY 29TH MAY, 2026

₵100

Dantopia Decisively Defeated By Tanirinthia

3-0 Loss Leaves Languishing Lions In Third Place — Out Of Automatic Qualifying Spots

By SAUL ARNSTEIN

National Team Stadium (NTS)
Dantopia0-3Tanirinthia
Half Time: 0-2
Bachus 19', 44'
Payne 59'

See also... MD1 | MD2 | MD3 | MD4 | MD5 | MD6 | MD7 | MD8 | MD9 | MD10 | MD11 | MD12 | MD13 | MD14 | MD15

LION CITY, DANTOPIA — Dantopia's second match-up against 5th in the world ranked Tanirinthia ended in defeat, as the Lions were beaten 3-0 by a rampant 'Jackalopes' side at the National Team Stadium in Lion City. Rick Bishop's men fell behind when Violet Bacchus headed in Lark Holt's cross within the opening twenty-minutes, and although the hosts were still in the game nearing the interval, a second Bacchus effort found the back of the net, helping the visitors nurse a precious 2-0 lead into the half. A third goal would seal things for Tanirinthia, when Bridget Payne got on the scoresheet, summing up a difficult day indeed for the Dantopians.

It was imperative the Lions get a result out of this match, if their dreams of an automatic qualification spot were to be realised, but all they could do was try to weather the early storm, such was the force the Jackalopes kicked off with. Within a matter of seconds, Payne managed to get behind the Lions defence to flash a chance across the face of Winston Akana's goal. At the other end, Bradini Brunson managed to muster a chance of his own, but Elmer Marshall was equal to the strike. Johnny Kealoha and Jeremiah Taramaia tried to bring some spark to proceedings, but it would be the visitors getting on the scoresheet first.

Lark Holt waltzed past Kaleb Kahananui to get into the box, and whilst their initial cross was blocked by Kai Watanabe, it rebounded into the forward's path once more, and the second delivery found its intended target. Violet Bacchus was standing near the penalty spot to head home the opener for the visitors. The creative flair of Holt simply proved too much for the 20-year-old Kahananui to defend.

The Jackalopes would gain the upper hand for a spell, but Bishop's men were able to cause at least some alarm when Nico Hollins ran onto an Ezra Cunningham through ball, but the winger finished wildly. Fortunately for the Portland Pirates player, the offside flag was raised meaning the chance wouldn't have counted in any case. A few moments later, a cross from Kealoha was chested down brilliantly by Brunson, who again forced a save out of Marshall. However, the referee penalised the Lion City FC striker for an inadvertent handball when he controlled the ball.

Bud Barnett would fire spectacularly high over the bar from the edge of the area — the shot might have hit row Z — but the ferocity of the affair seemed to dwindle in the latter stages of the first half, until the Jackalopes would leap into action. A throw-in on Tanirinthia's right hand side would see Lark Holt slide Violet Bacchus through again. With one goal already to her name, the Noechatel Athletike forward would rifle a second one home, past a helpless Akana in net. 2-0 now, and a difficult team-talk awaited Rick Bishop at the break.

The brightest moment of the evening would come for the Lions early in the second half. Kahananui's left-wing cross was met sweetly on the volley by Bradini Brunson. The Dantopian striker couldn't have done any more, but a world class save from Elmer Marshall pushed the effort wide, and it seemed inevitable now that nothing was going to fall the way of the hosts. Adebayo Adeyemi would come on for his 63rd appearance for the national team, the second-most behind team captain Ezra Cunningham's 69 (nice). His introduction looked positive almost immediately, when he breezed past his marker to test the Tanirinthian keeper, but Marshall would stand firm, denying the Grenadiers winger with ease.

Then, soon after forcing a save out of Akana, Bridget Payne would be gifted all the space in the world to score on the counter, following a corner from the Dantopians at the other end. Ferris Dixon would spring the counter-attack, feeding the ball to Payne precisely. The Twineur Bugs forward could barely miss when put through one-on-one against the Dantopian keeper. This was an absolute body-blow for the Lions, who had created a few chances and looked more likely to score until this point. From this point on, the sting had been completely taken out of the game, and the Tanirinthians would very professionally and methodically play the ball around the pitch, with the Dantopians barely able to sniff the ball.

Group 4 World Cup 101 Qualifying Round
POSNATIONPWDLGFGAGDPTSSTATUS
1  Tanirinthia       16   10   3   3   35   22   +13   33   Qualification
2  Eshialand         16   10   0   6   33   23   +10   30   Qualification
3  Dantopia          16   8   5   3   37   25   +12   29   Play-off Rounds
4  Lisander          16   7   2   7   33   32   +1   23   Play-off Rounds
5  Auprussia         16   6   4   6   25   21   +4   22   Play-off Rounds
6  Sudilia           16   7   1   8   27   33   -6   22
7  Saperetia         16   5   6   5   24   22   +2   21
8  Xanneria          16   4   4   8   20   34   -14   16
9  Gwarkos           16   3   5   8   12   23   -11   14
10  Allamunnic States 16   3   4   9   18   29   -11   13
GREENGuaranteed at least a Play-off Round Place
REDEliminated From Play-off Contention

This was until very late on in the game, when a flurry of chances for the hosts should have at least robbed Marshall of a clean sheet, but all were either spurned by the shot-stopper or flew wide of the mark. Brunson had an effort narrowly bobble off-target, and Kealoha was unable to divert an Adeyemi cut-back goal-wards. Substitute Bradley Bing would at least get one on target, but it didn't prove any bother for the resolute Marshall, who seemed to only grow in confidence throughout the match. Ultimately, the referee would bring an end to a very frustrating ninety minutes for the Lions, with the group leaders snatching all three points, and surely cementing their place atop the group for the remainder of qualification.

The slide down to third is the lowest the Lions have sat in the group table throughout qualification, but it could well be the spot they finish in, having had the allure of an automatic qualification spot thrusted upon them and the fanbase up until this point. It is still possible for the Lions to climb out of the hole they have dug themselves, but with Eshialand playing the Allamunnic States at home and Tanirinthia facing Xanneria at home as well, it seems likely the 1st and 2nd placed sides will defeat the two mathematically eliminated nations. Meanwhile, Dantopia will play out their final home match of qualifying against Saperetia at the Kava Bowl in Waiakea, before travelling to Xanneria for their final match-day eighteen game. Eshialand and Tanirinthia will play Sudilia and the Allamunic States respectively. For the Lions to have a shot at automatic qualification, they will require one of Tanirinthia or Eshialand to drop significant points, whilst ensuring they don't slip up themselves — this may prove too tall an order.

xg.unit
1d

Dantopia (1.44) 0-3 (2.24) Tanirinthia #DANvsTAN #WorldCup101 #Qualifying #Group4

by **The Ko-orenite Constellation** » Fri May 29, 2026 5:11 am

Serenitas Novae 0–3 Tlalocayotloren
Chromatika 4–2 Chanmingoren
Bandar Cang Prathoren 1–2 TJUN-ia
Vetrahjart 0–0 Églantinoren
Shahrbanoren 1–0 The Republic of the United Marble Tribes
Stewartika 1–4 Meia-Armadoren
Tonboren 1–0 Cothe Saria
Valentine Z 2–0 Ndugutisaoren
Tarören 2–1 Quakmybush
Tlalocayotloren 0–1 Serenitas Novae
Chanmingoren 4–1 Chromatika
TJUN-ia 2–1 Bandar Cang Prathoren
Églantinoren 2–0 Vetrahjart
The Republic of the United Marble Tribes 2–0 Shahrbanoren
Meia-Armadoren 2–1 Stewartika
Cothe Saria 2–2 Tonboren
Ndugutisaoren 0–0 Valentine Z
Quakmybush 1–2 Tarören

Well, there it was, time for the most awkward conversation in the Constellation again. To the outside world, the qualifiers were scheduled against 'the Ko-orenite Constellation', internally they have been against constituent member states instead. And that leads to a lot of finger-pointing about which teams clearly let the union down, which ones were surprises, which ones were propped up by being scheduled against worse opposition, and so on. That, in turn, has to lead to a single team for the playoffs and hypothetical finals - World Cup or Cup of Harmony, or maybe the Campionato Esportiva? - which is grounds for even more finger-pointing and angry KitKots about your star player getting left out but some yokel from Églantinoren making it in instead. Clearly the selectors are biased against your nation and they're paid by state actors to select some farmer from Tonboren.

Chanmingoren had to play Chromatika, which is enviable to nobody, but they've held themselves together remarkably well, with a 6-5 aggregate win (4-2 loss, 4-1 win). Clearly they've earned their spot atop the pecking order!

Bandar Cang Prathoren played TJUN-ia so they had to back up their humongous ego about being the actual best footballing nation in the Constellation. With two 2-1 losses they weren't bad but they've also proven to everyone around them that they're being blowhards. Ndugutisaoren are equally cocky but they at least took a point against Valentine Z.

Tarören were initially unhappy with their designation but found their matches against World Cup royalty Quakmybush to go pretty well for them; two two-one wins. Tonboren won four points off Cothe Saria, Tlalocayotloren got three versus Serenitas Novae, Églantinoren got four against Vetrahjart, Shahrbanoren got three versus the United Marble Tribes, and that's your World Cup 101 qualifiers in a nutshell.

Tarören were the only ones to win six points, and then Bandar Cang Prathoren and Ndugutisaoren were the only ones failing to win at least one game - against tough opposition, sure, but bullies of their caliber were surely better than this? - and that leaves the squad selection for what's next. Them and Chanmingoren (winning against Chromatika! Probably their biggest national victory, ever) will make up a good part of the squad, but there are also a few spots left open for players who weren't in the qualifiers - for failing to finish at a decent spot in the Constellation Championship that took place before the campaign started - but are individually good enough to get called up. Some superstars are simply cursed by living in a team that can't play for toffee.

And so this'll be the team for the playoffs:

GK Bao (M) Zhu (CHNM, 29) - Qiaoliang Yanzhituo
GK Wambeere (F) Kioni (NDUG, 21) - FC Bugizi Service
GK Jose (M) Núñez (ISID, 25) - Atlético Sant Silvestre
GK Athar (f) Sehat (SHAR, 23) - Venant Shahibad

DEF Begum (F) Eser (TARÖ, 22) - Sülüzerspor
DEF Hoàng Hữu (M) Công (CNPR, 19) - Cam Dinh Cuu Rong
DEF Wamuiru (F) Nyakio (NDUG, 28) - Kilebya United
DEF Nandi (F) Luvuno (NDUG, 26) - Mbansenyi Rangers
DEF Mia (F) Mathieu (EGLA, 27) - Athletic Club Saint-Hyppolytais
DEF Renata (F) Couto (ARMA, 25) - CSG Clube Sociedade Gandulas
DEF Rodrigo (M) Firulinheiro (ARMA, 19) - Olímpico FdE
DEF Tizitl (m) Nealtican (TLAL, 22) - Citlalinco
DEF Mahya (F) Mousavi (SHAR, 24) - Satevis Nishaveh
DEF Delshad (m) Sa'id (IRIT, 29) - El-Akhthar
DEF Tala (f) Kawkab (IRIT, 24) - Al-Faiha
DEF Nour (m) Qahwa (IRIT, 23) - Al-Soqur

MID Nazli (F) Erbakan (TARÖ, 27) - Sülüzerspor
MID Jiang (M) Lian (CHNM, 26) - Shibigou Dizhen
MID Tymofiy (m) Horbatyuk (ZIRN, 26) - Lokomotiv Lirnykivka
MID Egbert (M) Herink (BATV, 26) - All Stars Reinaardskerk
MID Finn (m) Vos (BATV, 23) - UNO Beneden-Drommel
MID Lívia (F) Malapeir (ISID, 25) - CE Santa Catarina
MID Joseph (M) Durling (AYMO, 22) - Greater Oriole United
MID Parsa (M) Mofid (SHAR, 33) - Satevis Nishaveh
MID Illi (M) Huayanay (URUA, 26) - Chaski Huancarayu
MID Maria (F) Löwenstern (OFHP, 27) - 1. FC Sonnenburg
MID Lani (f) Masali (SYNE, 25) - Limyniokos

STR Gunel (M) Gul (TARÖ, 25) - Namankandspor FK
STR Yagmur (F) Efendi (TARÖ, 28) - Terganspor
STR Suhendra (M) Kurniawan (CNPR, 22) - PSBB
STR Na (F) Zhang (CHNM, 23) - Qingjiaoliao Youke
STR A-yun (M) Park (GWAS, 22) - Cheonbongri Electronics
STR Toshimichi (m) Miyayoshi (TNBO, 25) - Aonuma Blues
STR Kaveh (M) Nasirian (SHAR, 30) - Darik Gavirmagh
STR Ksenia (f) Balakhadze (ZAKH, 19) - Tbisunda Qitjaani
STR Kiran (m) Nagarkoti (ARHO, 18) - Madhyapur FC

Starting XI (usual backup in brackets):
GK Zhu (Sehat)

RB Eser (Nyakio)
CB Mathieu (Nealtican)
CB Firulinheiro (Sa'id)
LB Mousavi (Công)

RM Erbakan (Durling)
CM Herink (Masali)
LM Horbatyuk (Lian)

RF Kurniawan (Miyayoshi)
CF Zhang (Balakhadze)
LF Park (Efendi)

by **Choppyhausen** » Fri May 29, 2026 7:13 am

"I was under the impression that the World Cup was happening in Farfadillis and Paradystopia."

"That is correct, yes."

"Well, I haven't seen a single penguin this whole match and the, uh, 'stadium' is not even a little bit on fire, which has brought me to the conclusion that we're not in either of those nations."

"What a great deduction. Have you ever thought about becoming a detective someday?"

"Very funny. But we've won our playoff match, didn't we?"

"The first one. We lost the second one, so now we've had to do a tiebreaker, here, on neutral ground."

"There was a second one? So this was not the first match of the proper World Cup?"

"No. Did you not notice, that we were playing Katzeburg again?"

"Now that you're mentioning it, the kits looked oddly familiar, yes."

"..."

"So where exactly are we?"

"I've been told, they call this 'The Shanty' and it's in Taxhavn."

"Tax haven?"

"Havn. But yes. It's like Choppyhausen City on steroids but as it's own nation. And with better football teams."

"Elaborate."

"Well, according to the current IFCF rankings, Taxhavn's SteuerLig ranks 3rd in the entire multiverse and their best—"

"I meant: elaborate on the 'C-City on steroids' part."

"Oh. Well, it's, like, the place where all the rich guys go to sit in their palaces made out of literal money and swim in their pools of gold coins instead of making their nation able to build an orphanage."

"This place doesn't look like it was built out of literal money..."

"Do you know the crumb-ish thingys you get in the pocket of your pants when you've left a 10₦ bill in there before putting it in the washing machine? I think that's what they made The Shanty out of."

"Mhm."

"And they're probably watering the, uh, pitch, with all the tears that the Taxhavnites shed when they think about all the poor people they could've helped."

"So they're watering with nothing?"

"Exactly."

"..."

"..."

"Soo, uhh, now that we've won the playoff... Can we go to Paradystopia or Farfadillis?"

"Nope. This was only the first round of playoffs. For us, at least. Some teams have already played one round. And then this round. And now, there's one round left. And we're facing Zwangzug."

"How are our chances looking?"

"Wellll, I mean, in theory, Zwangzug is 44th in the KPB+ rankings which is only, like, 13 places above us."

"And in practice?"

"In practice, Zwangzug was the 16th best team of the group stages..."

"And 32 teams qualified without going to the playoffs?"

"Mhm."

"So Zwangzug was better than half the teams that qualified automatically?"

"Mhm."

"Fuck."

"Mhm."

(O.O) · by **TJUN-ia** » Fri May 29, 2026 10:14 am

After a campaign of both highs and lows, our fate in WC101 Qualifying has come down to this window. Everything that Philip van Oosterend had been working towards had come to this - two final games which would decide whether we were on the plane or would have to face two more games just to reach the Dance again. TJUN-ia's history in this sport isn't as great as we would like it to be, a scattering of WC appearances mixed in with some pain and suffering that would make most men cry, but we still played this game to our best abilities, and we still threw everything at this process because everyone still believed that we were a decent national team. So now, we had to try to prove it again.

Tallawah Stadium would host our final home game of the group against Cothe Saria, and while some eyes were focused on our final game, we couldn't just let this one slide either. We had to make sure we went to Mandalay in the best possible position, and so we were gunning for the win here...in what turned out to be a pretty chaotic affair. An early brace from Diana Sharafutdinov in the opening 20 minutes made everyone think this game was as good as done...until the Verde Lions started upping the tempo, Yanis Cunobelinos smelled blood in the water, and both Brando Thais and Alexius Arie punished our foot for being off the gas to send this game to half-time at 2-2. That was certainly a scare...but we recovered well to allow for Maryam Doutsi to head home the winner in the 66th. Not exactly our best performance, but with the Ko-Stars taking points away from the Kittens, we would have a two-point lead in Mandalay to defend.

And then the game arrived. Kyarpan Stadium in Mandalay, Valentine Z vs TJUN-ia with 2nd in this group and a ticket to the World Cup on the line. This was the game we had all been building towards, a moment in our history where we would take on one of our best friends, one of the best nations on the planet (in our opinion), and go one-on-one for a spot at the World Cup. It was supposed to be this moment where, no matter what happened, our dignity as a sporting nation would remain intact. Sure, ValZ could beat us convincingly, but we would, at the very least, just say "oh well" and move on to the playoffs confident in ourselves.

But what happened in Mandalay was the most disastrous final day defeat we have suffered in a long time. We got choked out 4-0 in a game that was just...not close at all. We just couldn't get out of neutral at all, and we just...played scared shitless because, in this massive stadium, it was as if everyone got stage fright. We tried to get something from this game, just anything, but that was a useless endeavour. We looked done out there, as everyone had collectively given up before the whistle blew...which is wrong, because we know everyone gave everything in that game, but Val Z made us look like that. It was a shambles. And then the draw for the Playoffs happened.

Russian Empire EHA walked over Andossa Se Mitrin Vega due to another instance of state-sponsored doping before, to the surprise of no one, losing 6-1 on aggregate to the true boogyman of our fate - Kelssek. How on earth fucking KELSSEK finished 4th in their group, I do not know...but they did. Pretty convincingly, at that, so this wasn't some fluke of Group 7 either. No, they performed badly enough to end up 4th...which is why we have to face Ryan Potter's side over two legs. The Stadium of the Workers in Neorvins hosts first, followed by the National Stadium in TJUN-ia City.

This tie is as high-class as you can get for a WCQ Playoff...but it is also strange. By all metrics, Kelssek are the favourites in the tie - they are ranked higher than us, have more pedigree than us and are genuinely seen as a better footballing nation than ourselves in so many ways. It would not be a surprise if, come the final whistle in TJUN-ia City, it is the Blue and Red who are celebrating a hammering deserving of their status.

But because we finished 3rd in our group, we are the higher seed in the system's eyes... so despite being the odds-on underdog, we get to host second. So instead of trying to get something at home and defend it in Neorvins, we go there first. That means, no matter what happens in the 1st leg, we would have home advantage in the tie - either to try and overturn a deficit, to win the tie on home soil, or to defend a lead with our fans cheering us on. We are the underdog in a system that favours us.

So, we enter this tie favoured by the system, but the underdog if you have eyes and follow the sport. In this scenario, two trains of thought come to mind.

One is the more understandable - that we are fucked. No matter what we do in this tie, we were screwed the moment we got put into Kelssek's path, and we should be awaiting our inevitable demise and Cup of Harmony invite as the good little TJUN-ia everyone knows. No one would miss us at another World Cup, Kimi-Suomi is doing just fine without us, and the WCC machine would still turn if we were 4th, 40th or 400th in the rankings. So go out there, do us proud, and let's see what the Cup of Harmony will bring us.

The other train does exist, but is hopeful at best - that we can still do this. Screw QSIM, screw what everyone else thinks, and go and listen. We have home-field advantage in the tie, which is a luxury that we should exploit to the fullest, and the fact that we are here does not overshadow the campaign we have been on. We haven't won this many games in WCQ since our last trip to the dance in WC99; we bettered our past win percentage in PvO's first campaign, coming off a QF appearance in the Campeonato Esportiva with a team that is older than most. You don't win 35 points off a fluke, even if we lost 4-0 in that final game. That was just one game - what's stopping us from going out there, punching Kelssek in the metaphorical balls and proving everyone wrong? Who's to say that we are destined to fall when we have the advantage of hosting a Top 20 team in our building? We took Chromatika to the wire in that building, we have made so many memories for ourselves in the most legendary arena in TJUN-ian sports - why can't the National Stadium produce one more?

David Seems and Li Xiu Ying were outcasts in the Playoff. Now, PvO has 180 minutes to avenge the Centennial for good.
Kelssek are good. But as long as we host 2nd...we have a shot.
GO JAGS!

SCHEDULE (Group 6)
(Stadium Guide can be found here)
MD1: @Quakmybush (152) L 1-2
MD2: vs Serenitas Novae (395) - Zebra Stadium, Toropo/Almadinat W 3-1 (T-4th)
-------------------------------------------------------
MD3: @The Ko-orenite Constellation (61) - Bandar Cang Prathoren W 2-1 (2nd)
MD4: @Chromatika (16) - Chromatik City Field, Chromia L 1-2 (5th)
-------------------------------------------------------
MD5: vs Vetrahjart (124) - Tiankong Stadium, Tiankong W 3-0 (3rd)
MD6: @The Republic of the United Marble Tribes (307) L 0-4 (6th)
-------------------------------------------------------
MD7: vs Stewartika (88) - Estadio Universidad Carlandas, Carlandas W 4-0 (5th)
MD8: @Cothe Saria (430) - Cedarville Stadium, Cedarville W 1-0 (3rd)
-------------------------------------------------------
MD9: vs Valentine Z (23) - Beregozera Stadium, Szensky D 1-1 (3rd)
MD10: vs Quakmybush (152) - Ke Kahua Pāʻani o Pua Aloalo, Kepu Manu W 5-3 (3rd)
-------------------------------------------------------
MD11: @Serenitas Novae (395) W 2-0 (3rd)
MD12: vs The Ko-orenite Constellation (61) - Stade de la Victoire, Roi Ville W 2-1 (3rd)
-------------------------------------------------------
MD13: vs Chromatika (16) - National Stadium, TJUN-ia D 4-4 (3rd)
MD14: @Vetrahjart (124) W 2-0 (3rd)
-------------------------------------------------------
MD15: vs The Republic of the United Marble Tribes (307) - Estádio do Pacífico, Rio Pacífico W 2-1 (2nd)
MD16: @Stewartika (88) L 0-2 (2nd)
-------------------------------------------------------
MD17: vs Cothe Saria (430) - Tallawah Stadium, Port Town/Portuaria W 3-2 (2nd)
MD18: @Valentine Z (23) - Kyarpan Stadium, Mandalay L 0-4 (2nd/11-2-5/35pts/+8GD)
-------------------------------------------------------
POR3: vs Kelssek (19/7-4) - Stadium of the Workers, Neorvins/National Stadium, TJUN-ia City

by **Saperetia** » Fri May 29, 2026 4:44 pm

Late Loss Leads Teams
Dantopia 1-0 Saperetia

We head on off to a nation close to us in rank, but far off in the table: Dantopia, who now sit 3rd after a series of unusual losses. It will be an intense match for and by both sides as they each have something to play for. For Dantopia, it is the possibility of regaining a place in the automatic qualifiers, and for us, it is a place in the playoffs. Both teams are expected to be on their best in their best qualifiers, and high hopes back home will help energize the players. As such, both sides brought out their best as the SAP 4-3-3 lined up against the DAN 4-3-3:

Saperetia: GK Hranislav (C) DEF O'Connel, Carloza, Damjan, Simmage MID Hardin, Govind, Shah ATK Jacques, Kauko, Seppo

Dantopia: GK Akana DEF Kahanaui, Foster, Robinson-Tate, O'higgins MID Kealoha, Watanabe, Cunningham (C) ATK Taramaia, Brunson, Hollins

The teams went out and tried to make something happen, and it was evident that neither side would try to play for the draw. The Crimsonites abandoned their practical back 5 and sent Govind forward to help with controlling the ball in the midfield. This opened up opportunities for the Dantopians to attack Hranislav's goal, but the goalkeeper managed to hold off any attack. On the other side of the pitch, the Saperetians also threw themselves at the goal but the defensive line held. This resulted in the half ending in a goalless 0-0 draw against what either team had hoped. Silivia saw his defensive line standing solid and decided to sub out players on the attack, switching out Kauko and Govind for Seppel and Inget respectively. Despite the fresh injection of energy, still the crimson couldn't punch through, but neither could the Dantopians who were attacking the other way. In an attempt to end this stalemate, the match got a bit more physical and multiple players received yellow cards for their ingressions, with examples being Carloza in the 71st and Inget in the 81st, both for tackles that led to free kicks that both managed to hit the woodwork. It would eventually be another of such ingressions that broke the stalemate, when a free kick in the 85th minute taken by Taramaia flew straight past the wall and curved just past the reach of Hranislav to give the home side the lead. Despite some desperate attempts from the Crimsonites to bring one back, and attempts from the Dantopians to increase the lead, the match ended with said goal standing alone on the scoreboard.

The loss leaves us in a dire situation in regards to the playoffs. We stand 7th, two points off of Lisander in 5th, who lost 3-0 to Auprussia, who we play next. It is almost certain that a win would be required to have a chance to enter the playoffs. Alongside potentially ending our playoff chances, this loss also loses us our unbeaten streak, which went on for 9 matchdays, exactly half the qualifiers, and which beat our previous record of 6 in BoF 80. Despite likely leaving these qualifiers empty-handed, many fans have warmed up to Silivia, especially since his disastrous run at the start of the previous qualifiers. Many are hoping that he will remain and that he will adapt the lessons from those cycles into a better run next time.

Saperetia Out
Saperetia 0-3 Auprussia

We stand at a final opportunity to grab something. It is matchday 18 out of 18 and we have two points and two teams separating us from the playoffs. Unfortunately, neither of those is Auprussia, so this means that even a win may not be enough to move up, and a draw or loss would definitely seal our exit at the latest point it can. It is the first time we are participating in a final day with anything to play for, and we have an entire stadium supporting our team. The nerves are high, but that only adds to the excitement, as for the final time, the SAP 4-3-3 lined up against the AUP 4-4-2:

Saperetia: GK Hranislav (C) DEF Abdelkader, Carloza, Damjan, Anatoliv MID Gil, Inget, Camilo ATK Jacques, Seppel, Seppo

Auprussia: GK Gallis DEF Vermanditre, Mensbard, Aregnac-Tignone, Di Portefenisa MID Vimnirre, Siebault, Thurisc-Arger, Lithobert ATK Audac, Mitregasque

The match began as most matches do for the crimson, with them on the defence and the visitors on the attack, firing away at the goal. To the dismay of the home crowd, one of these attacks early on saw Audac play it through the line due to a defensive miscommunication, bringing on a 1-on-1 against Hranislav that saw the first goal of the match be scored only 9 minutes in. This set on a cycle that seemed to work averse on the Saperetian team, where each Auprussian attack would lead to a downgrade of motivation, which would lead to more mistakes, which would lead to more attacks. While this did lead to The Crimsonite defence looking like it was constantly about to completely crumble, it managed to hold on for at least thirty minutes before conceding the next goal, this time by Mitregasque, which came from a conceded corner and header. The final six minutes of the first half and the injury time were characterized by the Auprussians throwing all their energy into attempting to bury this game before half-time, but surprisingly the Saperetians managed to hold on until the whistle blew. The two teams headed off into the dressing rooms in very different spirits, where one was happy with securing their position in the table and the other would need to lead a desperate second half to be able to secure anything. Unfortunately for the home side, morale did not improve in fifteen minutes and the second half began in a very similar manner to the first, with the only change being the defence holding on for ten minutes this time before a cross by Lithobert saw Audac put in his second of the match, ending any chance for Saperetia to gain anything. The final thirty five minutes were the Auprussians holding off any attack while the crimson tried to make anything happen. Despite failing in the last two matches, the team was given an applause at the final whistle for their efforts in this cycle.

We have finished 7th in the groups, 3 points off of the playoffs. We walked in with nothing, we came out with nothing, and had a hell of a journey to get there. Despite it looking like a repeat of the previous qualifiers when we lost 5 in 7, we then went on an amazing unbeaten streak to return to playoff contention, matching and beating teams far higher in rank than us, before falling out at the very end. We bow out for this edition, and we hope to see everyone, the players, manager, fans and readers, for the next show, wherever, whenever.

by **City of Myrtle Beach** » Fri May 29, 2026 9:15 pm

PLAYOFFS | ROUND 2 | LEG 1
Myrtle Beach 3 - 2 Auprussia

Goalscorers:
Myrtle Beach: 54' Petersen; 59' Petersen; 67' Chukchov
Auprussia: 43' Audac; 88' Mitregasque

PLAYOFFS | ROUND 2 | LEG 2
Auprussia 4 - 4 Myrtle Beach

Goalscorers:
Auprussia: 21' Audac; 30' Audac; 44' Mitregasque; 77' Siebault
Myrtle Beach: 5' Petersen; 48' Petersen; 83' Chukchov; 90+3' Fisher

The water on Lake Cooper is exceptionally clear in the summer. If it were not for the refraction of light then it would be impossible to tell that there was water there. You can, of course, feel the water when you are in it, but even then, you can still clearly see your feet in the water as it slowly flows and pulsates around your legs. It was unlike anything else in Myrtle Beach, as the ocean water was not nearly as clear- although some say that, in the old days, before the hotels and the industry, before the pollution came to the pristine lands of the beach, the water of the ocean was clearer than glass. Today that can only be experienced at Lake Cooper. The original settlers of this region, awestruck by the grandeur of the lake, resolved to always keep it as great as they found it. Apart for some periods in history, it remained that way. And so today the lake is free of that pollution which plagues the ocean beaches across the country. When you view it from the south, at the top of the Cooper River waterfall, you can see the city of Lake Cooper, and above it, the great mountains of Myrtle Beach, towering above the land, dissipating into a blue haze at the peaks of those mountains. It is certainly the most beautiful view in Myrtle Beach and perhaps the most beautiful place in all of Arrosia.

It is here where it is said the great General Robert Conway, the greatest explorer in all of English history, first encountered the dragons of Myrtle Beach. He was leading an expedition party when he first came to the foot of the great lake. Here the party encountered the natives of the Marshlands. Seeing these strange men, they refused to make deals with them, as they had heard of the abuses that the men from the ocean had given their brethren who lived on the shores. The natives on the shore worked with the Englishmen, invited them in, and when the natives were no longer of use to the English, they were disposed of. A terrible story that has been unfortunately told many times throughout the history of the British Empire. Conway, though, had nothing to do with this- he strongly opposed that terrible tragedy and travelled inland for the purpose of establishing a new land where the English and the natives could truly learn from each other. So, upon being rejected by the natives, Conway offered a gift in goodwill: he offered all the gold and silver that the party had carried, and then departed.

But, before the party could get far, a rumble was felt in the area. It was the coming of a great dragon, the one which this native town served. Why the dragon chose to come at this time was never learned, and yet, it did, and at just the right time as well. The dragon approached Conway and studied him. It was not, by any means, a particularly great or large dragon, but it mesmerized the party, especially Conway. Conway was overwhelmed by the dragon, and by the time it was just in front of him, he fell to his knees, and he wept. He did not weep in fear, for the dragon clearly meant no harm; no, he wept in awe of this creation, and here it it said that he swore to the Lord that he, for as long as he lived, would protect this great country and those things which called it home. And the dragon looked over Conway, and it accepted him and his kin. The dragon backed towards the natives, and the natives took a small amount of blood from the dragon, and the natives put the blood into a mug. The natives led Conway forward, to the edge of the lake, and it was here where he first saw that wondrous view of the Lake Cooper, pristine, nearly untouched by man, framed by those beautiful blue-misted mountains, and he fell to his knees, and he wept once more. His party followed behind him, and they wept.

The natives then offered him the mug of the blood of the dragon. In the culture of the natives of the Marshlands and of the mountains, the dragons are the vessels of their God, and to drink the blood of the dragon was to be imbued with the holy spirit; blessed for life, a member of the elect. Conway drank the mug, and after this, the dragon flew away over the lake, and watching this, Conway again wept, and the old native medicine man who gave Conway the mug wept as well. This moment on Conway would dedicate his life to protecting the natives of Myrtle Beach. Disease did claim many of them, unfortunately, but he ensured that treatment was given where possible, and that the environment they called home would be protected as much as possible. He lived until he was 110, dying in 1746. For his entire life he did not waver from this cause, his promise to God. In the tradition of the natives of the Marshlands, it is said that Conway was reborn as a dragon, a vessel of God, to remain on this earth and protect that land which he deeply cared for.

In the centuries since, much of the country has departed from those deeply environmentalist views held by Conway, particularly on the coasts. But in the Marshlands, they have never forgotten his message. Even as the gears of time inevitably turned, and as more and more people came to the northern towns to escape the crowded cities of the coast, much of the land was still protected. Including that spot where Conway encountered that first dragon. The natives there have long since left, most dying from disease and the rest fleeing to the mountains or integrating with the settlers. But a day rarely passes where someone is not sitting at that same spot where Conway wept. Many men have come to that spot to seek the same revelations that Conway found. Eventually, to protect the area, it became closed to the public and was only accessible by special request. Most requests are denied; the last to visit that spot were Tony Blair and George W. Bush in 2003. Surely it has been much longer since anyone has truly experienced anything at that spot.

Today, though, James Robinson is at that spot. There is no security around the spot; simply signs asking for people not to access without request. Many come anyway, and today Robinson is one of them. Here he came to contemplate the Seagulls' next match against Edsmontik. It would, of course, be incredibly difficult. There was no doubt in his mind. The players... they would have to play like they have never played before against one of the best teams in football right now. To most it would be considered impossible. He knew, of course, that nothing was truly impossible, but eventually the odds get so incredibly small that it would be futile to try to seek out some certain possibility. But he felt good about this one. He watched the light flutter on the lake as the water slowly moved. The team would have to move majestically like that. They would have to flow like water in the face of what is to be incredible pressure from the Edsmon team. In all honesty, Robinson really wasn't incredibly confident in the ability of the team to beat the odds here. As long as they could put up a fight, his job would be safe and next time they would surely make it. But, a part of him really did feel like they would beat the odds. All they had to do was score just one more goal against the other team. They had done it against Auprussia. They just have to do it against Edsmontik. Of course, it was far easier said than done, but it was possible. And not one-in-one-million possible either- the odds had to be at least a little better than that. The team had, admittedly, played a bit better than he had expected at the start of the campaign, and they were far, far closer to the qualifying dream than he had ever anticipated. All they had to do was score one more goal, and they were in.

One more goal. It couldn't be that hard, right?

by **Dantopia** » Sat May 30, 2026 2:41 am

VOL. 46,172

LION CITY, DANTOPIA

SATURDAY 30TH MAY, 2026

₵100

Resolute Lions Grind Out Victory — Keep Hopes Alive

1-0 Win Against Saperetia Means Dantopia Still Need Favours From Sudilia Against Eshialand In MD18

By SAUL ARNSTEIN

The Kava Bowl
Dantopia1-0Saperetia
Half Time: 0-0
Taramaia 85'

See also... MD1 | MD2 | MD3 | MD4 | MD5 | MD6 | MD7 | MD8 | MD9 | MD10 | MD11 | MD12 | MD13 | MD14 | MD15 | MD16

WAIAKEA, DANTOPIA — The Dantopian national team put their previous home defeat to Tanirinthia behind them by earning three crucial points against Saperetia at the Kava Bowl in Waiakea. The Lions were able to stay in the fight for a highly coveted automatic qualification place for this cycle's World Cup, but a comfortable Eshian win against the Allamunnic States means Rick Bishop's side will be hoping for Sudilia to hold 'the Owls' back — and win against Xanneria themselves, in order to secure 2nd place in the group. Tanirinthia are uncatchable for the Dantopians now, so the 1st place that the Lions held onto for much of the qualification cycle is sadly no longer a possibility. They are at least secured of a play-off place, and it will likely be one that only requires a single round of fixtures against an opponent yet to be determined.

With Alex Bullvale still out with a back problem — though he will almost certainly return for the Xanneria match — Winston Akana retained his place in the starting eleven, and Dalton O'Higgins was favoured over Makaio Cruz-Richards, in the only change made from the side that lost to 'the Jackalopes' in the capital. The Lions would have to remain firm against a slew of Saperetian chances, with Taramaia's free kick five minutes before the end deciding the fixture. It's the ninth win for Dantopia in qualifying, but a crucial tenth may be needed if automatic qualification to the World Cup Finals is to be realised, and even then, it may not be enough if Eshialand win their fixture against Sudilia.

With an impetus on needing a positive result on the night, the Dantopians would dominate the ball early on, with Johnny Kealoha orchestrating an early chance for Brunson, but the forward couldn't get the lofted ball under control. The visitors, with ground to make up of their own, also required something from this match-up, and soon began to flex their own muscles. Moments after having a frivolous penalty shout waved away by the referee, the team in red almost broke through. Plamen Seppo brushed off Kaleb Kahananui down the flank, before cutting inside and unleashing a curling effort that missed the far post of Akana's net by mere millimeters.

Warning signs would continue to come the way of the Lions, as Otto Camilo would be the next to leave the away fans with their heads in their hands. He simply couldn't apply enough accuracy to his shot after dispossessing Kai Watanabe. The Saperetians would then have the ball in the back of the net when Aapo Kauko tapped in from a yard out, following a square pass by Joel Hardin, but the wandering midfielder had clearly strayed offside before his pass to the striker, and the relief of the protesting Dantopian defenders was felt when the referee correctly followed the instructions of the linesman.

With the tide having turned, the Lions needed to grab hold of the fixture once more, and they almost did just that when Ezra Cunningham muscled his way down this right-hand side before cutting one back across the penalty area. On the receiving end would be an open Jeremiah Taramaia, as Bradini Brunson's dummy run had freed a pocket of space for his club teammate to shoot, only for the effort to sail wide of the mark. This was the closest the Lions came to opening the scoring before the half.

At the start of the second period, the Dantopians would continue to push, and Ezra Cunningham's lung-busting run through the lines resulted in an opportunity to shoot. His low and firm effort was comfortably saved by Hranislav, however. Saperetia, knowing how damaging a defeat would be to their play-off hopes, found a sense of urgency in their play. Substitute Richard Seppel would only just miss the mark with a powerful header which met a lobbed pass from Erberte Jacques.

Group 4 World Cup 101 Qualifying Round
POSNATIONPWDLGFGAGDPTSSTATUS
1  Tanirinthia       17   11   3   3   37   23   +14   36   Qualification
2  Eshialand         17   11   0   6   35   23   +12   33   Qualification
3  Dantopia          17   9   5   3   38   25   +13   32   Play-off Rounds
4  Auprussia         17   7   4   6   28   21   +7   25   Play-off Rounds
5  Lisander          17   7   2   8   33   35   -2   23   Play-off Rounds
6  Sudilia           17   7   1   9   27   34   -7   22
7  Saperetia         17   5   6   6   24   23   +1   21
8  Gwarkos           17   4   5   8   13   23   -10   17
9  Xanneria          17   4   4   9   21   36   -15   16
10  Allamunnic States 17   3   4   10   18   31   -13   13
GREENGuaranteed at least a Play-off Round Place
REDEliminated From Play-off Contention

Yet another Cunningham shot would go wide, following impressive hold-up play from Bradini Brunson. Unfortunately, there was still much to be done at the other end to deny the visitors a chance to score. A Dantopian head got on the end of another dangerous Jacques cross, before a follow-up needed the Winston Akana to the rescue once again — Plamen Seppo being denied the chance to level proceedings this time. The frustration from both sets of fans continued to grow, showing how important a victory was to not only the hosts, but also the visitors.

The match would start to get physical following the seventy-minute mark, with challenges flying in and cards being brandished for both sides. Not one, but two free kick efforts agonisingly hit the woodwork for Dantopia, teasing the home crowd. Both efforts were taken by Johnny Kealoha, before a light injury forced the Kyethas Riverman off the field with eight minutes left to play. Rick Bishop ushered on Adebayo Adeyemi and Maverick Johnson, aiming to stretch the opposition with some counter-attacking movements, an attempt to interrupt the rhythm of the visitors, who had experienced the better of the chances in the match until the free kicks that hit the woodwork.

Jeremiah Taramaia

Time was running out for Dantopia to impose something on the game, when yet another free kick on the edge of the box was won by Bradini Brunson, the forward having his shirt tugged and denied a chance through on goal — though interestingly a second yellow card was not awarded to Iwo Carloza, much to the annoyance of the home crowd. With Kealoha off the pitch, the duty instead fell to Jeremiah Taramaia, who unlike Kealoha, was able to guide the ball into the back of the net, curling past the outstretched arm of Milovan Hranislav.

Despite some urgent attempts late on by the Saperetians, a desperate shot from range by substitute Steffe Inget was the best the visitors could muster as the away fans headed for the exits. The result would be confirmed on hearing the referee's whistle — 1-0 to Dantopia. An important victory, achieved under sustained pressure by Marcus Silivia's side.

The loss leaves the visitors clinging onto hope that other fixtures may go their way and a play-off spot could still be achieved, but with twenty-one points following match-day seventeen's conclusion, they find themselves in seventh place, very much on the outside looking in. Conversely, the Lions now sit on thirty-two, just one behind Eshialand. As mentioned earlier, Dantopia's fate isn't entirely in their own control, with them needing to better the Owls by at least a point to take hold of second place — as they should hold a head-to-head advantage over Eshialand, as well as goal difference.

The Shanty, Taxhavn

An away win against Xanneria in the final game of Group 4 would go a long way to helping the Dantopians' qualification quest, but even this wouldn't be enough on its own. However, it would cap off the best ever qualifying run for the Lions, who even if they should fail to qualify from 2nd place, would be very likely to draw a lessened play-off schedule. Still, the fear from many Dantopian footballing fans of what could find the Lions in the play-offs are valid. Potential play-off partners include the likes of Kwrpania; Strayaroos; Edsmontik; Kelssek; Kamijiro; and more, all of whom would be firm favourites over Dantopia. Moreover, familiar faces such as Calgasia, the Ko-orenite Constellation and Biyambi could also await, with all three having defeated the Lions in previous cycles.

There is also the prospect of a third, tie-breaking match being decided at 'The Shanty', in Taxhavn during play-off rounds, a rather dystopian and ad-hoc assembly of retractable sheds. The less than stellar construction of this arena leaves much to be desired, and how well Dantopian legs will fare on the un-even, mud-laden pitch will be a frightful thought for a group of national team players much more accustomed to pristine grass carpets in fancy, modern stadiums. Fans across the nation hope and pray, no matter how the Lions get there, they have a team to cheer on come the World Cup Finals.

Regardless of any success of qualification or not, the run during this cycle has been impressive, and the stewardship of the national team by manager Rick Bishop has been a thriving one. The hope is the DFA will be able to renew the contract of the 41-year-old former goalkeeper, who now boasts a managerial record of 17 wins, 11 draws and 9 defeats, providing the head coach with a 46% win percentage. A win against Xanneria would only improve this, and bolster his chances of a fresh new deal should the Lions qualify for the World Cup in Farfadillis, Paradystopia ~~and Wight~~.

xg.unit
1d

Dantopia (1.89) 1-0 (1.75) Saperetia #DANvsSPA #WorldCup101 #Qualifying #Group4

Expected Line-up — Play-off Round 3 Leg 1 @ The Ko-orenite Constellation:

Starting Eleven:
GKP: 1. Alex Bullvale
DEF: 2. Raphael Lacroix — 4. Sam Robinson-Tate — 5. Makaio Cruz-Richards — 3. Dalton O'Higgins
MID: 8. Ezra Cunningham (C) — 6. Kai Watanabe — 10. Johnny Kealoha
FWD: 11. Nico Hollins — 9. Bradini Brunson — 7. Jeremiah Taramaia
Available Substitutes:
13. Winston Akana — 12. DeAnthony Moorhouse — 14. Keegan Foster — 16. Kaleb Kahananui — 18. Elleby Young — 20. Bradley Bing — 17. Adebayo Adeyemi — 19. Zeke Edwards — 15. Zaïre Thomas

Expected Line-up — Play-off Round 3 Leg 2 vs. The Ko-orenite Constellation:

Starting Eleven:
GKP: 1. Alex Bullvale
DEF: 2. Dalton O'Higgins — 4. Sam Robinson-Tate — 5. Makaio Cruz-Richards — 3. Kaleb Kahananui
MID: 8. Ezra Cunningham (C) — 6. Kai Watanabe — 10. Johnny Kealoha
FWD: 11. Adebayo Adeyemi — 9. Bradini Brunson — 7. Zaïre Thomas
Available Substitutes:
13. Winston Akana — 12. Raphael Lacroix — 15. Emerson Cromwell — 16. Dwight Krol — 18. Omari Opetaia — 20. Bradley Bing — 17. Nico Hollins — 19. Zeke Edwards — 14. Jeremiah Taramaia

Expected Line-up — Play-off Round 3 Leg 3 (if required) @ The Shanty:

Starting Eleven:
GKP: 1. Alex Bullvale
DEF: 2. Dalton O'Higgins — 4. Sam Robinson-Tate — 5. Makaio Cruz-Richards — 3. Kaleb Kahananui
MID: 8. Ezra Cunningham (C) — 6. Kai Watanabe — 10. Johnny Kealoha
FWD: 11. Adebayo Adeyemi — 9. Bradini Brunson — 7. Jeremiah Taramaia
Available Substitutes:
13. Winston Akana — 12. Raphael Lacroix — 14. Keegan Foster — 16. Dwight Krol — 18. Elleby Young — 20. Bradley Bing — 17. Nico Hollins — 19. Zeke Edwards — 15. Zaïre Thomas

OOC DISCLAIMER: The likenesses of players and managers have been created with the help of generative AI. The likeness of 'The Shanty' was provided by Farfadillis and merely resized. Every other image in this RP was completely hand-made.

by **Masraya** » Sat May 30, 2026 4:19 am

The Straits Press

The 101st World Cup Qualifiers Review
The Return of Mandalanusa

By Ahmad Nazri Rahman, Senior Football Correspondent

For most of the time during the campaign, Mandalanusa looked like it would once again fail to send a national team to the World Cup. After all, that was what usually happened. The last time a Mandalanusan nation qualified for the World Cup was during the 96th World Cup in Mertagne and Huayramarca when the United Mandaran States made its only appearance in the World Cup. Since then, every qualifier ended in disappointment and the rest of the world began to forget about the region that once produced a World Cup finalist in the form of Pemecutan.

Entering the 101st World Cup qualifiers, nobody expected any of the eight Mandalanusan nations to qualify.

Almost all of them are new to the international stage. Both Biyambi and Bhumi Matawis Empire are only participating in their second ever qualifiers after making their debut in the 100th World Cup qualifiers while half of the nations, Serumpun, Masraya, Hintuwan and Nueva Compostela had never even participated in a World Cup qualifier before this campaign. Even the only two nations that had participated prior to the 100th World Cup, Eraman and Sharktail, had been absent from international football for a long time.

But by the end of the group stage, we could be looking at the strongest campaign for Mandalanusa as a region ever.

For most of the history of the World Cup, Mandalanusa had always been a mere observer. The first time a Mandalanusan nation ever appeared on the World Cup proper was during the 89th World Cup in Tikariot and South Newlandia. Before that, not a single Mandalanusan nation ever made it to the World Cup. It's not that no one tried. A lot of nations tried. But to no avail. Until Pemecutan made it and became the first Mandalanusan nation to play in the World Cup.

And since then, Mandalanusans had a nation to root for whenever the World Cup came around. Even Eramanians supported Pemecutan every time they qualified. That was at least until the 96th World Cup. In that period, Mandalanusa had always sent a nation to the World Cup. Pemecutan from the 89th World Cup until the 95th World Cup and its successor state, the United Mandaran States in the 96th World Cup.

It was a period when Mandalanusan football was at its peak, watching Pemecutan become the runner-up once as well as reaching the semi-finals twice, quarter-finals three times and the round of 16 five times in a total of seven appearances. Everyone thought that it would be like that forever and it was only a matter of time before Pemecutan won the World Cup. But then politics happened and both Pemecutan and its successor state, the United Mandaran States ceased to exist, taking Mandalanusan football into obscurity once again.

But after four editions without a single Mandalanusan nation, the region finally has someone to root for in the 101st World Cup as Bhumi Matawis Empire ended the drought after securing an automatic qualification from Group 13 in only their second ever World Cup qualifying campaign. And for the first time ever, Mandalanusa could see more than one nation in the World Cup as both Masraya and Biyambi had also secured a place in the third round of the playoffs.

Even at its peak, Mandalanusa had never seen more than one nation in the World Cup at a time. Hence the question, is this going to be the strongest campaign for Mandalanusa as a region ever?

Headline makers

Standout team: Bhumi Matawis Empire

No Mandalanusan nation had a better campaign than Bhumi Matawis Empire. They came into the campaign ranked 97th in the world. And after the group draw revealed that they will be in the same group with nations such as Recuecn and Kwrpania, most people expected them to finish in the mid-table. But in the end, against all odds, they shocked everyone by becoming the nation that finally brought Mandalanusa back to the World Cup after four straight editions without a single representative.

And the main reason why they were so successful is down to consistency. While other Mandalanusan nations depended on home form or moments of magic, Bhumi Matawis Empire looked like a complete side that is capable of competing with anyone. They established themselves as genuine contenders even from the start when they beat Kwrpania and Eastfield Lodge early on. They kept their consistency throughout the campaign and as a result, for the first time in a long time, Mandalanusa will once again have a nation in the World Cup. And Bhumi Matawis Empire fully deserved it.

Breakthough nation: Masraya

Four Mandalanusan nations made their debut in the 101st World Cup qualifiers namely Serumpun, Masraya, Hintuwan and Nueva Compostela. And all of them were predicted to finish last in their respective group especially after watching Serumpun, the only Mandalanusan debutant who participated in the Baptism of Fire, struggled badly in the tournament specifically organized for debutants.

Instead, all 4 nations eventually overachieved in the qualifiers but none overachieved as Masraya who not only made it to the playoffs but also made it until the third and final playoff round. With Airannia being the last hurdle for Masraya to qualify for the World Cup, Masraya now stands only 180 minutes away from completing one of the most unexpected qualification campaigns in Mandalanusan history.

Most memorable match: Hintuwan 6–5 Edsmontik

There are many memorable matches involving Mandalanusan nations in the 101st World Cup qualifiers like Masraya's 3-1 home victory over former world champion, The Holy Empire and Serumpun's 2-0 victory over World Cup regular, Busoga Island. But the most memorable match involving Mandalanusan nations has got to be Hintuwan's 6-5 victory over Edsmontik who came into the qualifiers ranked 12 in the world.

The match itself was not only memorable because of the stature of the opponent but more because the high-scoring match. Everyone expected Edsmontik to score many past Hintuwan but no one expected Hintuwan to score many too. Not just many, but more than the goals scored by Edsmontik too. It was chaos from start to finish and in the end, neutrals were happy to be treated with goal galore.

Star player: Azman Ariffin (Masraya)

Mandalanusa had produced many top talents in the past. Even when Mandalanusan nations failed to qualify for the World Cup, there are still a lot of Mandalanusan players playing for top clubs in top leagues around the world. Even players from small nations like Sharktail who never qualified for the World Cup had players playing in top leagues. But this time around, the best Mandalanusan player in the qualifier actually still plays his club football in Mandalanusa and had never played outside of Mandalanusa in his career.

Almost nobody outside of Masraya and Serumpun knew who Azman Ariffin was. Even within Mandalanusa, he was still relatively unknown compared to more established names from Biyambi or Bhumi Matawis Empire. But by the end of the group stage, it was clear that Azman Ariffin had become the face of Mandalanusa in the qualifiers. Even at the age of 34, he is still scoring for fun. His hattrick against The Holy Empire in the third match immediately turned him into a national hero. And he just can't stop scoring. In fact, he alone even scored more goals than some nations in the qualifiers.

Playoff hopeful: Biyambi and Masraya

Almost everyone thought that the 101st World Cup would be the fifth straight World Cup with no Mandalanusan nations. Instead, not only did Bhumi Matawis Empire make it to the World Cup, the region also has two nations standing one step away from the World Cup, giving hope to Mandalanusa of sending more than one nation to the World Cup for the very first time.

For Biyambi, the playoffs felt like the minimum target especially when they achieved exactly that in their debut in the previous qualifiers. As the back-to-back Mandalanusan champion, people expected them to fare better than the rest of the region. But then, after six matches, Biyambi was sitting at the bottom of the group without a single victory and their campaign looked like it was collapsing. Luckily for them, they managed to turn things around starting with the 5-1 away victory over Kamijiro and in the end, finished third in the group and secured another playoff spot. Imagine if they hadn't started their campaign so poorly, they would probably be in the World Cup by now.

As for Masraya, their journey was completely different. They were expected to finish dead last in the group. But instead, they started strongly even from the first match. They managed to turn the Masraya National Stadium into a fortress where away teams like The Holy Empire, Shin-Zetsubo and Gyaromia came to lose. If their away record is half as good as their home record, they too would probably be in the World Cup by now.

Ninety more minutes home and away. One last chance to make this the most successful Mandalanusan campaign in the history of the World Cup.

by **Edsmontik** » Sat May 30, 2026 7:09 am

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FIRST IMPOSSIBLE, SECOND NOT GUARANTEED

Friday, 9/23/2033, 12:05pm
Written by Vyktor Kalsefja

Edsmontik is on a losing streak. The same team which dominated the first half of qualifiers was now down and suffering from 4 away losses in a row, and now just suffered a draw at home to a team which was not doing so well in qualifiers anyway. They had such a good looking run against Qusmo for the 15th matchday, and then, like so many recent games, the opposition scored in the near last minute. It was effectively over for the Eagles. There was practically no way to come back into the game. There was just no time to score in retaliation. Their game against Kandorith was fortunately better.

Fans alleged that the Busogan newspaper, which joked about sending a witch to curse Edsmontik, caused an actual witch to curse the Eagles. This has allegedly led to their loss to Qusmo. This is supposedly even further proven as the paper had called for it if the Busogans lost to Legalese, which they did the morning before the Qusmo game. Legalese beat the Busogans 2-1. Crazily enough, this WORKED. The Eagles lost in a last minute goal from Qusmo.

The Qusmo game began with a Qusmi'y kick off. It was hell after that, but mainly for both teams. Within a few minutes of being in play, there was a sweat inducing tooth and nail physical fight as both teams played rough tackles when the other got too close. Fouls were called as early as the fourth minute. Edsmontik had a free kick. Then Qusmo had a free kick. Corners, Corners, Corners. The goalkeepers for both sides, der-Stoiuben and Kepex-Cheng, were practically working at their highest rate since the start of their careers.

Eventually, the yellows began to pour out. Edsmontik knew they wouldn't be giving this game up easily as the Busogans had just lost. It was an opportunity to slip ahead once and for all, and to secure a spot close enough to potentially reclaim the throne of Group 11. So, they fought. Everything was done to prevent a goal.

Shot after shot, both teams got closer and closer to scoring. But it wasn't ever close enough to be enough. The keepers on both teams as well as the defense were holding their lines well. Obviously not well enough to prevent big runs, but still enough to prevent goals. The game continued like this for well over half of the game. It only slowed down towards the middle of the second half as players began to really feel the "aftershock" of playing so hard.

Once the fatigue was in effect, der-Ghavyr and Illinx-Kepex, managers of the Edsmon and Qusma teams respectively, began issuing substitutes. Once one was out on the field, both teams dropped in more. However, both the Edsmons and Qusmi were smart enough to leave behind one or two substitutes for last minute chances.

At the 90th minute, an extra nine minutes of stoppage time was issued. Throughout the game, there were so many yellow, so many fouls, yet no red cards at all. Qusmo had already used up their last substitute in an effort to score which was deemed offside by a referee. Edsmontik had one substitute left, and their plan was to bring off the fatigued Stuero for Rehcikt, who could play alongside the recently brought in Utravak. it seemed like a good plan. With five minutes left, the ball went out of bounds, and the substitution happened. And then, chaos in the box within a minute for Qusmo.

Edsmontik's substitution was kind of a waste, in a way. Rehcikt was tackled pretty harshly to the ground in the box after a tough battle with Prant-Culak. The forward had sprained his ankle within the first minute of being on the field. It was a penalty for Edsmontik. This was the golden opportunity, the one way to finally reverse their bad luck, right here, with a penalty against Qusmo.

With Edsmontik's main players off the field, and no substitutions left, Edsmontik may have been down "more than one man," but it wouldn't matter if they sent the ball in. They would win, and there would be no way that Qusmo could possibly come back in the two minutes left. Standing in front of the ball with immense confidence was FDVL veteran Lajiflak Fruedenne. he had fought tooth and nail in the FDVL to be noticed. When he was finally on the team, he did everything to stay a starter. He was starter a lot, but not always. it still gave him happiness.

Fruedenne had no hesitations. he knew that "Margaret would determine its [the ball's] path to goal. So, he charged and fired. With so much power, the ball screamed across the grass, cutting through the air, heading right towards the corner of the net. But the same thing could be said for Kepex-Cheng. With one swoop, the ball was diverted off course and sent to a Qusmi defender, who within a series of passes, found the Edsmons in their most vulnerable state.

The Eagles, after being denied goal after goal, and now, a penalty in such a crucial match to secure a top two spot for direct qualification, conceded. With no defense to stop the Qusma attack, as everyone was around the box, each second the Eagles took to scramble together their back line was a second the Qusmi'y had to charge forward. der-Stoiuben, weak from the battles he had seen throughout the game, barely touched the ball as it went in. It was Culak-Zelez who delivered the blow with no time remaining.

The Eagles wanted revenge, they wanted something to calm them after the loss to Qusmo. The Eagles were much more laid back for the Kandorith game compared to the Qusmo game. Lots of pushing, but generally less overall. Luckily for them, with the game against Kandorith, it would come.

The Suberarenae was lively with determined fans who all wanted to see the Eagles win this week. The loss against Qusmo, despite being a crucial loss, was seemingly brushed off by the fact that the Eagles' fans almost knew that the Edsmon team would dominate over Kandorith in their home environment of Touve. Even better, the Eagles, who are used to the cold, happen to be playing Kandorith on this cloudy 13 degrees Fahrenheit day. It was beautiful for the Eagles, and terrible for the Kandorith team.

Yet when the game kicked off, things were clearly different. The Kandorith team immediately put pressure on the Eagles who were leading the attack. This was for the most part, expected, but not really at the same time. The Eagles were meant to be controlling the game in their cold environment. It seemed like the Kanyori were already slipping the controller out of Edsmon hands.

While the Eagles would go on to "regain" this control, it wouldn't be an easy task to keep it. The Kanyori began to send punch after punch at the Edsmon wall. It wasn't enough to score, but it was still an effort nonetheless, and it was wearing down the Eagles. There was a lot more back and forth than expected, which seemed to stretch time as the pressure to directly qualify punished them.

However almost as quickly as the Eagles were losing hope, they regained it. The Eagles were able to turn the blade around and cut through the Kanyori defense by the 30th minute. With some motivation from the very loud Edsmon fans, and the weather getting a little colder, the Eagles powered through, with a big chance opening up in the 37th minute.

With quite the skill, Darion Verto spun out of the way of Sasaki, driving the ball upfield and passing it to Wejikaj. The left midfielder then cut right into the center, handing the ball off to Svaardaen who pushed through both Kato and Nakamura to send the ball right into the back of the net. With that goal, Edsmontik was leading.

The game pressed on after the reset, and things continued to go well for the Eagles. They had even more chances in the second half, with near miss shots and very close saves. However, this is where the Eagles slowed down. They began to lay back, and seemingly just waited for the ball to come to them. It seemed to be a great tactic for conserving energy. While it was indeed a good tactic, it wasn't a great one. The Kanyori now had time to regroup and strike back.

Then, minute 68, the ball found its way into the Edsmon net. It was a draw, or so everyone thought. After a VAR check, the player who scored, Saito, was determined to be offside. The pass into the box had been conducted a second late, and the Eagles were already preparing an offside trap. This is where the Eagles' risky strategy came in. They would lay back and let the Kanyori strike, but hold themselves forward enough to put strikers offside. If the pass was timed perfectly though, the offside trap could be useless and give the attacker a free run to the net.

Against many thoughts, the tactic worked just fine. It even gave the Eagles a chance to counterattack, which they took with a lot of gratefulness. In the 74th minute, with a failed breach of the Edsmon lines, Javarqa sent the ball soaring up toward the center, where it fell into the chest of Verto. Darion Verto carried the ball up the field, sending it to Stuero, who passed the ball even further up to Reiovus. The young striker powered through the open defense, slamming a powerful shot into the top left corner of the net.

There wasn't too much to consider for the rest of the game. The Eagles once again went back to sitting in the defense in a manner that would catch strikers offside. When the 90 minutes were over, an extra five minutes of stoppage time were added. Despite Kanyori efforts, the game ended with the Eagles leading 2-0.

As qualifiers continue, Edsmontik still finds themselves down in third. Whether or not they can come back with just two games remaining is a matter that may be left up to Margaret to decide.

80,273 Likes - 9,128 Dislikes

10,283 Comments:
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LeVdesia1283
It's surprising no posts were made by ISN on the 17th and 18th MDs, so I'm going to help here and since playoffs are almost here, let everyone who didn't see footage know what happened. Game 17 against Eraman saw one goal from Fotserr in the 40th minute which was a header, and game two against Calgasia also saw one goal, this time from Aespana from a free kick in the 76th minute. Both games were 1-0s as you've probably read on the streggvalkligges website or the NSWC website. No videos anywhere currently of this match, hopefully it's just an error and they get posted.
18,273 Likes - 1,128 Dislikes

kaezera28
The Edsmon team is very powerful, unfortunate that they couldn't take out Qusmo. Luckily for the Eagles their last two games shouldn't be too hard,
16,293 Likes - 1,293 Dislikes

nictAucherz712
The Qusmo game was wild, exhilarating, so much so that I couldn't put it into words. It's crazy how they do stuff like this, so much chaos. Definitely worth the flight, airport stress, and ticket costs!
15,394 Likes - 1,019 Dislikes

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Edsmon Lineup, MD17
Lankiv - Dalsen, Shouzvenkreden, Travdt, Jervanois - Fruedenne, Zeukalmen, Reuhans - Fotserr, Stuero [C] - Bervaign

Edsmon Lineup, MD18
Lankiv - Kizani, Javarqa, Norseden, Jervanois - Aespana, Ystermakt, Ghreksbvy - Rehcikt, Stuero [C] - Utravak

Edsmon Lineup, PO3 Away
Lankiv - Kizani, Javarqa, Norseden, Jervanois - Wejikaj, Ystermakt, Ghreksvy - Svaardaen, Stuero [C] - Bervaign

Edsmon Lineup, PO3 Home
der-Stoiuben - Kizani, Javarqa, Norseden, Vikral - Fruedenne, Verto, Ghreksbvy - Rehcikt, Stuero [C] - Bervaign

by **The Sernetian Empire** » Sat May 30, 2026 7:57 am

SERNESPORTS TV

contents:
1) Sernet pulverises Eriadni 4-0 away
2) Quick analysis of the replayed MD16 as well as MD18
3) Pre-match analysis at The Round Table
4) Guide for away fans
5) And another thing...

Sernet pulverises Eriadni 4-0 away
Salman Ferisen

We were hoping to win this match, and we were quite sure we would. What we didn't expect was a win by 4 goals at Tiancheng Central Stadium in Eriadni. The stadium was swiftly jam-packed with Sernetian supporters eager to witness the spectacle, which was not a replay as it was unaffected by the matchfixing scandal.

The Steamers clearly asserted their dominance early on with a long shot scored by Sporius Bolsting, from an assist by Zbigniew Komstrowski, in the 8th minute. The Eriadnian goalkeeper, Long Xiaolian, attempted to save the shot but hurled himself in the wrong direction. The Sernetians celebrated vigourously, and the volume of chanting seemed greater when compared to before the goal. At the 15th minute, Eriadnian Bai Yanyu came close to scoring, but Tomasz Pasarowski, aided by Stirius Mantrostem and Janusz Tworpowski, quickly shut the threat down. A second goal from Bolsting came shortly after in the 16th minute, which he scored from a clear by Dominik Zoliba. Less than 20 minutes in, Sernet was already 2-0 up, with Bolsting being on the brink of a hat-trick. However, no more goals were scored in the first half, although Zenobiusz Kusek nearly scored a banger shot at the 39th minute.

During the second half, Bolsting got his hat-trick at the 57th minute after scoring a neat header from a corner by Wasori Oluwawa, who had come on for Kusek during half-time. Now the Steamers were 3-0 up, and from here surely it'd be smooth sailing. A few more attempts came and went, by Yarisem, Stork and Jatrowski, though none crossed the line, until at the 81st minute when Stefan Jatrowski scored an insane goal using his chest, aided by a pass from Samir Dottman. Sernet were 4-0 up with only a few minutes left, and at the 90th minute, the referee blew the whistle, not even bothering with stoppage time. Victory. Three juicy points at the most desperate of times. The players, Stoberus Pond and Don Swordsman, and of course the supporters all across Sernet and The Sernetian Empire rejoiced at this flawless win.

Final score:
Eriadni 0 - 4 Sernet

Goals:
Sernet: Bolsting 8', 16', 57', Jatrowski 81'

Quick Analyses of the replayed MD16 as well as MD18
Czesław Jalińowski

MD16 Replay vs Kharakia @ Seven Bridges

The replay of this match gave us a chance to put the score right, an opportunity which we took. This time, the score was 3-2 instead of the previous 2-2. Three excellent goals from the Steamers, those being by Wasori Oluwawa at the 40th minute, another by Korolianus Stork at the 66th minute and finally by Lansor Sakayo at the 76th minute pushed Sernet to a 3-1 lead, with Kharakia managing to score a goal through Síer at the 53rd minute. However, Kharakian Aleksander Tigarr scored a late goal at the 87th minute, bringing the score to 3-2. Fortunately though, Sernet still left with the three points, a step-up from the earlier singular point.

Final score:
Sernet 3 - 2 Kharakia

Goals:
Sernet: Oluwawa 40', Stork 66', Sakayo 76'
Kharakia: Síer 53', Tigarr 87'

MD18 vs Afanc Strait @ Sernetesen Lighthouse
Following our spectacular win against Eriadni, a team easily stronger than Afanc Strait, we expected this match to be an even bigger success than the previous one, especially considering that it was taking place at home in Sernetesen Lighthouse. However, on this occasion, our hopes were let down, not to fault the Steamers though. Sernet pressed hard, but by some miracle the Afanc Strait team managed to deny Sernet a goal.

Final score:
Sernet 0 - 0 Afanc Strait

ooc note: I am aware that MD15 also replayed, but we'll just say it wasn't as it resulted in the exact same scoreline.

Pre-match analysis at the Round Table

Table:

Group 9                    Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Indusse                  18   11   3   4    50   36  +14    36
 2 Flavovespia              18   11   3   4    32   20  +12    36
 3 Sernet                   18    9   5   4    36   24  +12    32
 4 Choppyhausen             18    7   7   4    27   23   +4    28
 5 Drawkland                18    6   8   4    29   28   +1    26
 6 Eriadni                  18    4  10   4    29   32   −3    22
 7 Kharakia                 18    4   5   9    33   43  −10    17
 8 United States of Alpha   18    5   1  12    26   32   −6    16
 9 Afanc Strait             18    3   7   8    22   34  −12    16
10 Anewkansas               18    4   3  11    23   35  −12    15

P.s. We're keeping the lineup the same. Stoberus Pond and Don Swordsman will make sure all players do something for Sernet this world cup.

Salman: Sernet did it. 32 points. Not direct qualification, but we're in the playoffs yet again. Because we were third place, we get to skip round one and two, and so we are inserted into Round 3, meaning only one match stands between us... and the world cup proper. We are in Bracket I, which also contains the nations of Martian Independent Republic, an opponent who we have faced elsewhere, Lisander, who we played in the World Cup 100, and Kamijiro, who we have never played before but soon will, because Kamijiro are the team who have made it to Round 3 to face off against the Steamers for that spot in the world cup proper.

Damian: The Playoffs consist of two legs, one of which will be played at Sernetesen Lighthouse Stadium, and the other will of course be played over in Kamijiro. This won't be the easiest game ever, considering the fact that Kamijiro are ranked at 22nd, but we have time and time again proved that we can win regardless of ranks, as demonstrated against Flavovespia in Nestomerisen earlier in the qualifiers. That being said, Sernet has once again jumped up the ranks to 77th place.

Bobby: As for the lineup, that's staying the same, with the 3-5-2 formation obviously having worked for Sernet ever since we started playing in the Nationstates World Cups. Of course occasionally the Starting 11 gets switched round, but for the playoff we're keeping it to the default: Pasarowski in goal, Mantrostem, Zoliba and Tworpowski in defence, Jatrowski, Alforez, Komstrowski, Dottman and Stork manning the midfield, and finally, Oluwawa and Bolsting up front. Of course the bench is full of talented players we could always bring on, such as Kusek, Esingfort, Kolbense, Yarisem and Zerning, just to name a few.

Grzegorz: Well folks, that's about it. We've made it to the playoffs. This is the moment of truth. Will we make it to the World Cup Proper? Hopefully... and the odds are looking good enough. Good luck to the Steamers, and see you all later.

Guide for Kamijiroan fans: How to reach Sernetesen Lighthouse stadium

Welcome, Kamijiroan fans, to the wonderful country of Sernet! Thank you for visiting Sernet. You may find that our extensive rail network may be challenging to navigate, or that you can't seem to find where Sernetesen Lighthouse stadium is. This guide is designed to help you!

When you arrive at Sernetesen Storimidros International (we're assuming that's where you land), follow signage until you end up at the SMR station for whichever terminal you land at - for you lot it's likely to be Terminal 4. From here you have two options: take the slow SMR service down to Sernetesen, or take the fast Airline service to Sernetesen Arsenal. We'd recommend you take the Airline; it gets you from the airport to Sernetesen in just 15 minutes (a bit longer if catching it from Terminal 4) for a very slightly higher fare. Once at Sernetesen Arsenal, utilise the covered walkway to get to Sanosia Junction. From there, catch a westbound SMR Lime Line service towards Damonesiyum. Be careful, most SMR lines have a ton of branches, and the Lime line is no exception. However, the Lime Line has helpfully been named after the colour it is shown as, so that's nice. Just make sure to catch either a train that terminates at Spaldensen Banks or a train that says it goes via Lighthouse Wharf. You shouldn't have to wait too long as frequency on the SMR is good. Get off at Lighthouse Wharf, and from there it is literally a 2 minute walk to the stadium. Sernet has an abundance of public toilets should you need the loo. The SMR train doesn't have toilets, but Airline does. Upon arrival at Lighthouse Wharf, you should find all the amenities you need; restaurants, cafes, shops, you name it. Free wifi is available at the airport, on the trains and at the stadium. If you wish to stay at a hotel, there are plenty relatively cheap but high quality hotels at Lighthouse Wharf. Staff will be at all mentioned stations and around the stadium to provide assistance. We hope this guide will allow you to navigate to your destination with ease. Enjoy your visit to Sernet!

And another thing...

The Team at Sernesports TV wishes Sernet luck.
From Left to right: Czesław, Damian, Salman, Peter, Bobby. Tadeusz and Grzegorz are not in this photo.

ooc note: Come on Sernet! I'm genuinely hoping for a spectacular performance.

#thepowerofsernet

by **Zwangzug** » Sat May 30, 2026 7:58 am

THE COSMOPOLITAN MISANTRHOPE

hating all the people, everywhere

EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW WITH BABUR BONAPARTE

The World Cup qualifying group stage has concluded, and the playoff field is set. Several scorelines were altered by VAR, after Paradystopi referees were found to be even more tuned-out than normal referees. We're here with Babur Bonaparte, referee at the Eagles' Club in Forbridge on Matchday Eighteen.

CM: It's never a good sign when the referee is the most-discussed participant after the game.
BB: Squawk, squawk?
CM: Well, even Nation states logic had a roster provided, I don't think you can fall back on that excuse.
BB: Squawk, squawk squawk squawk.
CM: Yeah, well, that's Nation states logic for you.
BB: Squawk squawk squawk squawk, squawk squawk.
CM: Yes, it happened in lots of other matches as well, but I don't think that's any better, it just means we generalize about your country's incompetence instead of blaming you personally.
BB: Squawk squawk.
CM: Maybe for you. Okay, describe what was happening in the match.
BB: Squawk, squawk squawk squawk squawk squawk, squawk squawk. Squawk squawk squawk squawk squawk, Keowpa wmwjwm, squawk squawk, Ksksksksks. Squawk squawk squawk squawk squawk...Ksksksksks.
CM: Okay, so the visiting goalkeeper is pretty far out of...of their position, when Lavrans receives the pass from Istibar. So you signal for offsides. But the play continues just...in case?
BB: Squawk squawk squawk squawk.
CM: In case something is wrong, which, by the standards of this tournament...
BB: Squawk squawk.
CM: Yeah, okay. So Lavrans taps it in, and you say the goal should have been disallowed.
BB: Squawk squawk squawk squawk squawk.
CM: Right. But afterwards, the review confirms that, although the goalkeeper was positioned strangely, one of the defenders was actually farther back. So Lavrans was onsides.
BB: Squawk squawk squawk.
CM: And the amended scoreline is 1-0.
BB: Squawk, squawk squawk squawk squawk squawk, TMRW, squawk squawk squawk, xe faer.
CM: Something similar happened to overturn the result of the Pasarga-Tomerion match, meaning that the Wanderers still finish above Zwangzug on the tiebreakers, so it's moot.
BB: Squawk squawk.
CM: And what do you think Zwangzug can expect from their playoff against Choppyhausen?
BB: Squawk squawk squawk squawk, squawk squawk squawk, squawk!
CM: I understand that referees are supposed to maintain a pretense of neutrality, but it's pretty rich assuming you or your cronies are going to ever work a WCC match again.
BB: Squawk squawk squawk squawk!
CM: Seriously? Typical.
BB: Squawk, squawk squawk squawk, squawk.
CM: Yeah, okay. So Choppyhausen are captained by their goalkeeper, always good when you've got a charismatic leader there at the back, and also play a defensive style.
BB: Squawk, squawk-squawk squawk-squawk, squawk!
CM: Yes, the hyphented names are out of control.
BB: Squawk squawk squawk, squawk squawk.
CM: I'm not an expert on gazelles, but sure, antelopes are nice.
BB: Squawk squawk squawk squawk, squawk squawk squawk squawk squawk, squawk squawk squawk. Squawk?
CM: Beppo Hegesa retired from the national side after World Cup 100, I don't see what he has to do with anything.
BB: Squawk squawk squawk, squawk! Squawk squawk.
CM: Yes, well, while we're on the subject of Brunnhilde Lavrans and correcting the tally...
BB: Squawk squawk squawk, squawk squawk squawk squawk. Squawk squawk!
CM: On matchday seven of last cycle, Zwangzug defeated Astograth 3-1, but only two goals were recorded in the Bassabook Baritone's box score. The statisticians have decided that Hegesa should be credited with a brace, not a singleton.
BB: Squawk!
CM: And they couldn't have told us that earlier?
BB: Squawk, squawk squawk, squawk...
CM: I guess you're right. Look, can we talk about your eggs?
BB: Squawk squawk squawk! Squawk squawk!
CM: No, I don't mean personally, I just mean collectively, as a species.
BB: Squawk, squawk squawk squawk, squawk squawk? Squawk!
CM: I'm sure you're a very intelligent individual who's capable of distinguishing your own eggs from someone else's--
BB: Squawk squawk squawk! Squawk squawk! Squawk?!
CM: --the WCC's standards can't be that high--
BB: Squawk squawk squawk!
CM: Look, I need your help because we have to deconstruct some things.
BB: Squawk squawk!
CM: If we let the Zwangzugians and people like them keep controlling narratives, they will never shut up about their stiff upper lips or whatnot. That would be insufferable. We have to--
BB: Squawk, squawk squawk squawk, sqwuak?
CM: Yes, we hate all the countries, but in particular right now we're--
BB: Squawk, squawk squawk, squawk squawk---
CM: Okay, please just chill.
BB: Squawk squawk squawk squawk squawk squwak.
CM: Yes, I know you're already--that was a figure of speech--
BB: Squawk squawk, squawk squawk.
CM: I think we're done here.

MD17: Rhiannon 45+1, Regins-Ybou 60

by **Kwrpania** » Sat May 30, 2026 9:17 am

The Day the Sky Rained Fire
Chapter Four: The Fire-Bringer

(For clarity, this work has been written with grammatical gender that, to current historical consensus, no longer existed amongst the persons included in it)

The soldier sat atop his horse. His men, mounted upon their own steeds, exhausted from the day's work and yet satisfied nonetheless, whooped and hollered as they looked down from the hilltop. An orange glow danced from the village that stood before them, a testament to their efforts. At his back, obscured by the rolling hillocks that comprised this area of Kwrpania, lay another smoldering pile of ashes, one that formerly had a name but would now be scoured from history just as it was from the face of the planet. He sat back, content with his work, took a swing from his flask of mapokab, and whistled the notes that called his men back to him and to their task, riding off into the moonless night.

A young man from the rural Northwest, broad-shouldered and yet with a gentle touch, his family's farm was all he ever knew until his third decade in life. It was by chance - some said destiny, some said an act of the Evil One - he was at the market when the first cries of a United Kwrpania rang out. Rektyr-zok, just a mere merchant from Bwdesed, the market capital of the west bank of Mother River, had put out his call to the people of his native Northwest to take up the banner of uniting the Kwrpan peoples under one banner, to make them strong in a world where division was as akin to weakness. One of many who answered the call, the man rapidly found himself advancing within the ranks of Rektyr-zok's Kwrpan Commonwealth, as it soon became known. However, not all Kwrpan had answered the call from the Clan of Lightning, and many, in fact, had come together within their own clans and regions as this new threat to their stability emerged. The South was yet disunited, and the Northern Unity not yet formed, but opposition was brewing.

The man had a name, of course. But not the one he is known by. He was born as a forgettable member of a minor branch of House Zokoz. He would earn the name he is known to history by. The second chapter of his story began with a simple raid. A few ships gathered to the south of Bwdesed, lifting into the calm waters of Mother River, lithely crossing to the far bank, into the North. As the men poured off their boats, the bright green standard of the Commonwealth raised high, a cry of alarm rang out amongst the villagers, but they were too late and too few in number of resist. It was said that the man's bravery in being the first to enter battle earned him the respect of his comrades, without words elevating him as the leader of this one of the many semi-independent roaming bands that formed the so-called "Army of the Commonwealth". It would be stood aboard one of those ships, drinking mapokab around a hearth and gazing at the flames in the distance, that the man would receive the name which Kwrpan children today know. Mwzdwba-zok, the Fire-Bringer, the lightning that strikes in the dark and singes whomever dares stand in its way.

Thus dubbed, Mwzdwba-zok proceeded to conduct the greatest campaign of roving terror known to scholars of the time period. By ship down Mother River and its many tributaries, by horse across the lush plains of the North and distant hills of the South, by camel across the arid West, nowhere was safe from his sword's reach. And, regardless of when exactly he received his name, there was never a shortage of instances for it to have been earned. But still, like the story of the great inventor of the Far South who sought to soar between mountains but was dashed upon the rocks below for his defilement of a sacred peak in the process, even great men face an ending. Mwzdwba-zok had heard intelligence from the Commonwealth's network in Tydebwg, a city vast and well-protected enough that their army had dared not do much but singe its outskirts, and by now the capital of the formed Northern Unity, a grouping of clans big and small across the North in response to the raids of the Fire-Bringer's band. The spy claimed to have knowledge of the changing of the guard, and that a well-timed and sufficiently fierce attack at the correct point could pierce the city like a dagger. Fresh off a victory over Northern Unity forces in a raid near modern-day Fwdrenybed, Mwzdwba-zok took his chances and led the largest band collected by the Commonwealth to date, almost three thousand men, into the breach. No steel stood between the Fire-Bringer and his aim of claiming the enemy's capital, his greatest triumph.

But it was all an illusion. His men scattered about, setting fires and looting homes in the narrow passageways of Tydebwg's outskirts, met a wall in the Northern Unity's blue as the forces allegedly distant arrived. First they came from the direction of the city center, the hill of legend where the Father bestowed upon the people their confidence and pionneering spirit. A response was expected, yes‚ and this would have been where it would come from, and soon fierce combat erupted, with steel clashing against steel, too tightly packed in the alleys for anyone to do anything but fight for their life. Then, fervently engaged in combat, a drumbeat began to pierce the afternoon air, of sword beating against shield. Too late, the men realized, it had been a trap all along. Behind them stood another force, matching their own, and ready to fall upon them in their rear.

There was little resistance following the closing of the jaws. Mwzdwba-zok, the Fire-Bringer, the one who had wreaked havoc across all Kwrpania, was felled as a common soldier, dying beside his men and going into their great burial pit that was dug under the remains of a village he had himself burnt.

The Kwrpan had known conflict. For generations, they had known the din of battle between tens, maybe hundreds of men.

Now, in the new era that the once-young farmhand had brought upon them, they knew war.

by **Pomachetti** » Sat May 30, 2026 10:55 am

Pomachetti

Link to Roster

Pomachetti

Trigram: PCT

Captain:
Sóuminé Dabhí

Home Stadia:
Ebheonn Mophto (Mophto)
Purt de Cuscro (Cuscro)
Núrt Fóníeger Giell (Coecria)

Players to look out for:
Níoll Éirpir
Seorgís Sarcisian
Íerd Papiola
Síemas Tesplannish

Set-Piece Takers:
Freekicks - Eldú Florensí
Penalties - Seorgís Sarcisian
Left Corners - Fíolom Mambhíní (left-footed)
Right Corners - Eldú Florensí (right-footed)

The Squad
Game Plan

Aréosto Tacorbhí's office was contemporary and well-furnished. A relaxing area with a couch and armchair, facing a wooden coffee table and large plant was on the right side of his room. His desk was large and imposing. And well-cleaned, thanks to his middle-aged janitor who must have OCD. Thanks to Ríemunn, the Pomachettian Soccer HQ would be in a state of too much mess. Ríemunn was in Aréosto’s office cleaning the two chairs the sat opposite his ginormous desk. When he was done that, he moved on to polishing the wooden walls, then clean the giant window that was the office’s left wall. He swept the wooden floor, returned to the window a few more times, and left. Saying: “All good now, Aréosto.”
“Thank you, Ríemunn,” he replied, “Whilst out there, could you send in Jieoc?”
“Of course!”
“Thanks.”
Aréosto reached for a drawer underneath his desk and took out a document. Obviously, a document of great importance. He fetched his pen from a posh pen holder. His pen was made with wood from deep within the Pomachettian rainforest. Either from the most eastern part of Cuscro or the most southern part of Titrílla. Golden outlines and a golden tip complemented the finely crafted fountain pen. Aréosto examined the pen, until Jieoc Bhrónan stepped into the room. Calm and stressed.
“Hi, Jieoc. I think you know why you’re here.”
“I do and I don’t. I’m assuming it’s because of Natkr.”

Jieoc Bhrónan was the man responsible for the performance of the Pomachettian defence. In group two, he finished off fifth out of the ten nations. Not a bad result, even more impressive when considering Pomachetti’s offensive archetype. Jieoc Bhrónan did an incredible job. Out of the eleven wins in the group, seven of them were won with only one goal the difference. He was able to shut down multiple offences and hold them to five clean sheets.
“You are indeed correct. As I’m sure you’re aware of, Natkr run a 1-2-4-3 attacking formation. Our defence, especially as of recently, is in unbelievable form by our standards. Just ignore that episode in Megistos. This defence combined with this attack is winning us many games. If it weren’t for the experienced sides of Vdara and StrayaRoos we would have won the entire group. But with Natkr’s unconventional formation, defending will be a monstrous challenge. We’re going to speak with Dúnel and Loem once they’re he-”
Suddenly, a knocking sound came from the door at the opposite end of the room. It opened, revealing Loem Dempiosí and Dúnel De Parseobhil.
“Well speak of the devil!” Interjected Jieoc.
“Sorry for being late, hi lads!” Said Loem.
“And sorry for interrupting the dinner date, we can leave yous to it after we come up with a genius gameplan to send ourselves to the World Cup.” Humoured Dúnel. The group chuckled and they took their seats. Loem sat down on the remaining office chair beside Jieoc, leaving Dúnel to carry over the armchair to the desk.

“Now,” began Aréosto, “about Natkr. They run a 1-2-4-3 attacking formation. Like us, they have a huge offensive focus. They should be weak in defence. And as of recent, our defence has been holding up well.”
“What about Megistos?” Rhetorically asked Dúnel.
"Where our offence didn't do shit?" Responded Jieoc
“Lads! Apart from Megistos, our defence has been holding up well. But so has theirs. What I've been thinking about is the usual 4-5-1 attack. It’s brought us great results and against Natkr I believe it will be highly effective. Seorgís and Eldú will keep the midfielders at bay. Fíolom and Úle keep the wide plays by Natkr at bay, allowing the backline to be narrower and stop any threats down the middle. Papiola will zonally defend in the final third and put pressure on whoever takes the ball after a heavy touch. Once we get it back, we launch a quick break and send the five attackers forward. Níoll will keep forward. Seorgís and Eldú recieve short for a non-risky ball. The wide midfielders will have to run with all they have up the pitch to act as support for the three up the field and even become options for goal-scoring opportunities. Does that sound like a plan?”
“Yep! Sounds good!” Replied Jieoc.
“It’s a good adaptation; I see some ways I could adapt some of our attacking plays to suit this plan even better.” Commented Dúnel
“Zzzzzzz...” Snored Loem
“Actually, what do we do when we have possession and there isn’t a counter atta-, oh wait, Íerd Papiola.” Said Dúnel
“Íerd is just the answer to everything. Let him work his magic when the five forwards are running all those squiggly lines and we’ll be grand.”
“Zz- wha? Oh yeah, that will be a huge amount of work for Loem and the wide midfielders. We should be taking them off at halftime for some fresh legs. I’ll make sure everyones up to scratch for these games.”
“Yeah, and I’ll run more defensive organisation drills to be sure. It’ll be a lot of work for the backline, but I’m sure they can manage. Could do some shifting and let Síemas be more confident to come off his line because with a team that offensive there will surely be break throughs every now and again. I’d recommend for the backline to be: Fierdurche Pergonsí, Elester Sottíní, Céot Túobón-Mecoumierí and Sóuminé Dabhí. Fierdurche is excellent as a defensive fullback with great awareness ande anticipation. Céot is just unbelievable. Full stop.”
“Well then, that's sorted. I’ll see you at the training pitch in about an hour’s time.”
The three got up and made their way out of Aréosto’s office.
“Thank you, see you.”
“Bye, Aréosto.”
“See ya.”
Aréosto leaned back on his chair. The chair, folding to a 45-degree angle, moved backwards as Aréosto kicked off his desk and turned to face the training pitch from his window. He could see several staff members and petty coaches hauling training equipment onto the pitch. It was from the players to the staff to the fans and to all of Pomachetti he wanted to do good for. He took pride into his work and country. He will deliver.

The Pub Boys and The Fans
United Chapter 1: The Quest

The match against Haltoria? Disappointing. A three-all draw to the lowest-placed team in the group. Pomachetti dropped two points. In reality, they did not gain anything, only lost. But at least it was a good watch, as were all of Pomacehtti’s qualifier matches so far. The Pub Boys definitely enjoyed it. “Creoc boin” as they would say. But through all of the chanting, all the cheering, all the noise in Núrt Fóníeger Giell, Martegh just couldn’t stop thinking about the backpack. Even at the packed pub after the game he couldn’t take his mind off it. He never opened it once. He knew that it was especially important for his best friend to run, give it to him, and run off without any explanation.

It was about half twelve in the morning when he got back to his apartment. As soon as he opened the door, he went straight to his room, took his fursuit off, and called Púl. Púl answered the call within a second of the phone buzzing.
“Hey, Martegh.” Púl whispered across the line, “I’m currently in one of the abandoned factories by the old industrial area. I’m in some sort of rusting locker room with my guys.”
“Umm, why are you in an abandoned factory? What is this.”
“Alright, I’ll explain from the very beginning. Basically, I stumbled upon some things that I shouldn’t have seen. When I did that Creotos sponsorship a while back, you know that one?”
“Ah yeah, the real cringy one.”
“Yeah, yeah, the cringy one. So, there was this part of storage and baggage that was secret. And when I went in, well, that’s when I discovered a huge secret.”
“The non-refunded flights”
“Yes, and other stuff like guns, drugs, the normal black-market stuff.”
“Wait, what?”
“I went to Lónsogh Industrial Port, which was where more illegal shit was. Now it turns out that Creotos was made up of a black-market cartel that created Creotos as a money-laundering business. But then Creotos, quite literally, took-off. The business made far more than the black-market stuff, so they decided to go down that route. But they had evidence to destroy, and the cartel never was. I got in there and took some evidence before they blew up the port. I was able to contact a guy that did the same thing as me and we met in Sudilia during the Baptism of Fire. We took some more evidence from the man to “connect the dots” and we fled back to Pomachetti. After that we were hunted by the cartel. We spent weeks evading the cartel and made our way to Coecria. And out on match day, I recognised you and you’re fursuit among the green jerseys. The cartel was coming for us. In fact, they’re coming for us right now. That’s why we’re up here in a factory. In that backpack we gave you is the evidence that will destroy the cartel. You just need to exactly as I say.
“What the fuck?”
Martegh was confused and scared. He had never held this much pressure in his life. His best friend was being hunted by criminals and Pomachetti was on the back-foot in the qualifiers.
“What you need to do, is just head over to the police department. Specifically, the one in Mophto. The guy I spoke with in Sudilia has a guy there who can sort all this out fast. If he’s even there. Oh yeah and watch out for the cartel. They’ll probably have CCTV footage or something like that. But I wouldn’t say they’ve even noticed by now. So really, you should be going like, now.”

Martegh Gaindulia, 24-year-old Coecrian, software developer and part-time Camenn Secer na Pomachetti delegate, now must deliver the package, hope, to the other side of Pomachetti. Whilst probably simultaneously evading an evil organisation of criminals. Despite the danger, he would do it. It was for his friends, his friend’s friends, for the greater good of Pomachetti that would be one step closer to a safe society free from wrongdoers that plaque the nation.
“Sorry for bringing you into this, Martegh.”
“It’s ok. I’m here for you whenever. I’ll see you soon.”
“I’ll continue to contact you. But for now, stay safe and I’ll see you on the other side of this.”
The phone call ended, and the quest for Mophto began.

News at Eight
The Big Game

Seafraí, 53
image obviously ai

Good evenin’, oim Seafraí Coindalogh and yous are watchin’ dhe ait o’clack news wit TVT Naecht.”

Íebhe Cielleogh, the usual news presenter walks in to the sight of the obese middle-aged man with a black goatee from what she guesses from the accent to be north Cuscro City. It was the man that streaked across the TVT Naecht newsroom about a week ago.

“Y- you?”

“Ah yeah me! Seafraí, fiddy-treeeee!”

He's a viral Pomachettian internet meme known as Seafraí, 53, who came to fame about four months ago after a weight-gain campaign funded by multiple minor fast food chains. He wore a professional black suit with a wacky red and yellow tie. And as far as Íebhe hypothesised, probably nothing down there.

“Beorris? Why aren’t you doing anything? You want this?”

Beorri the camera operator and Beorri the director were both giggling themselves to death.

“Now, loik, we gotha talk abaowt dhe sacca. We shurly winnin’ the whole ting, leh alone dat Nacker- Natkur? Nat-Kr? Games against Natkr. If wes somehaow lose dose matches then we lot have f-”

The Beorris started waving their hands franticly out of fear of Seafraí swearing.

“-ffff...ailed to qualify! Oooh, fuck that was close. Oh shit! Again! Shit!

One of the Beorris quickly pulled a plug and the broadcast suddenly stopped.

“Ahhh, sorry ‘baot dat lads. Next week, yeah?”

For the whole time there, Íebhe was frozen like a statue. Seafraí sat up, and Íebhe’s hypothesis was correct.

Matchday
A short film in the lead up to the big game by various Pomacehttian artists

Craeló, a well-known musical artist, lay on his couch scrolling on his phone.
"Hahaha, oh, what's this?"
He came across a post about the final match.
"Pomachetti vs Natkr? The big game? Well this calls for a song!"
The music starts
He gets up of the couch and walks over to the door, when three other men burst out of the other rooms and join in on the song.
The group walk down to the street, when another artist, Laeon Lompou, sings his part of the song.
As the song goes on, Pomachettian soccer fans start following the group.
Whilst signing, they come across a group of Pomachettian teenagers playing soccer in the alley. They kick the ball with them for a moment before continuing on.
By the time of the chorus, a large group of soccer fans dressed with the jerseys of the Pomachettian soccer team, all chanting and following along with the group.
At the second verse, yet another artists, MecMadu, appears from a bush and sings.
More and more fans amass through the rest of the song until the final chorus where the crowd ends up by the Ebheonn Mophto and the entire street is covered with fans. The camera zooms out away from the artists to show the colossal crowd and the stadium.
The film ends

Pomachettian Goal scorers vs Estorvipa & Estorpiva:
Eldú Florensí
Céot Túobón-Mecoumierí
Trough Perúod

Top scorers:

Níoll Éirpir – 9 (12 starts) (ST)

Seorgís Sarcisian – 9 (16 starts) (CAM)

Eldú Florensí - 4 (10 starts) (CAM)

Édhemh Loindenbirgh – 2 (6 starts) (CAM)

Fíolom Mambhíní – 2 (10 starts) (LM)

Déothó L'Airderlé - 1 (2 starts) (CAM)

Ártan Diríbaya - 1 (2 starts) (ST)

Trough Perúod - 1 (2 starts) (ST)

Seafraí Séhú - 1 (4 starts) (CM)

Llebhich Marjeta - 1 (6 starts) (ST)

Céot Túobón-Mecoumierí - 1 (6 starts) (CB)

Úle Salbhoé - 1 (10 starts) (RM)

Elester Sottíní – 1 (12 starts) (CB)

Íerd Papiola – 1 (12 starts) (CM)

Injured players:

Nouchles Reautí - Laterally sprained ankle (Grade 2) - UPDATE: Loem Dempiosí and the medical staff have stated that Nouchls will return in time for Pomachetti's play-off match

Starting XI to face Natkr

4-5-1 Attacking

GK - Síemas Tesplannish
LB - Sóuminé Dabhí (C)
CB - Céot Túobón-Mecoumierí
CB - Elester Sottíní
RB - Fierdurche Pergonsí
LM - Fíolom Mambhíní
CM - Íerd Papiola
RM - Úle Salbhoé
CAM - Seorgís Sarcisian
CAM - Eldú Florensí
ST - Níoll Éirpir

Match at home to be played at Ebheonn Mophto

by **Kwrpania** » Sat May 30, 2026 12:56 pm

WORLD CUP 101

CRUNCH TIME
Electric Eels face do-or-die World Cup playoff

TYDEBWG, NORTH PROVINCE – The National Stadium awaits a capacity crowd for the home second leg of Kwrpania's World Cup Qualification playoff against Abanhfleft.

The Electric Eels have struggled for consistency throughout qualification, and brutal losses on the road to both Super Earth and Taeshan left the side three points adrift of second-placed Bhumi Matawis, with the Mandalusans earning a gutsy 4-3 victory at Super Earth before securing their spot in the World Cup with a 1-0 home victory against Taeshan. For Kwrpania's opponents, meanwhile, Abanhfleft finished fourth in Group 1, losing their chance at automatic qualification on the penultimate matchday with a loss to eventual qualifiers Kimi-Suomi before losing the third spot the next match with a 2-1 home loss to group winners Audioslavia. Entering the playoffs in the second round, a 3-1 victory on the road set them up for success in the home leg against Smoltrendestof, where a 0-0 draw secured their aggregate victory.

National manager Dobgazoz-bof remained confident, noting that despite the shaky away record, the Electric Eels had remained perfect at home, and exhorted "all up and down Kwrpania" to rally behind the side in preparation for the two-leg tie. In one quirk among many of this cycle's qualification format, the two-leg playoff will be decided on aggregate, but if the sides remained tied after 180 minutes, a final tiebreaker match will be played in Wight, despite hosting authorities insistence that the nation has nothing to do with the tournament. As always, all of Kwrpania's World Cup qualification matches will be broadcast live on KBN1, with pre-match coverage beginning two hours before kickoff. Tickets to the home leg of the playoff at the National Stadium are available at www.kff.co.kwr/byva.

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by **Natkr** » Sat May 30, 2026 2:06 pm

Face it.

Just face it.

You can't keep looking at death in the face and say nothing. You need to face it yourself. You need to look at it in the eyes and tell it, "I'm not scared anymore." Scare it. Do anything. The more you let it roam around like a lion, it becomes stronger more like an elephant. We are coming. The Natkrian national team has waited way too much for this. They aren't doing this for themselves, that's been the point this whole time. The boys needed to know what they were facing up close. Natkr has always been underestimated, belittled, as a mediocre country. But now it's the time.

The boys played well in their opening playoff game against Taeshan, in which they put themselves up 2-0 in an amazing game away from home.

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