NSCF 35 - Everything Thread

[Dhemixia]

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The Columbus Dominion(Est.1873)
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Why is the Crairg Raid Working?

Schedule

*blue indicates home games
Week 1: @ Trent State W 45-16
Week 2: vs. Green City W 40-24
Week 3: @ Prince Pieter's L 19-21
Week 4: vs. Novaaria W 61-17
Week 5: @ Fusa College
Week 6: @ Elite Eleven
Week 7: vs. UNSJJSM
Week 8: @ Nowa Kalanianska
Week 9: vs. Mar Sara Tech
Week 10: @ Raynor
Week 11: vs. Rinaldi
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Non-conference play
Week 11: BYE
Week 12: @ Bitternea
Week 13: vs. Fluff State

Like an unknowable amount of other things in Dhemixia, the meteoric rise of the Jays' offense in NSCF 35 makes absolutely zero sense. There's a lot of things about this season that don't particularly make sense, like Bitternea and Rinaldi's rise through the ranks which echo the Jays' own rise in NSCF 30, but the thing separating these occurrences into different tiers is their level of conceivability. With enough mental gymnastics, I guess I could see Rinaldi and Bitternea top three in their respective conferences after four weeks, but Craig Kelly leading the Crairg Raid offense into the second best scoring offense in NSCF? That's simply just not possible in any known universe.

It takes some absolutely wild results from Maggie to have Craig and Scott Linhart in the same COTY conversation, yet here we are after four weeks. Yes, there's still a very large amount of time left, but knowing Craig, the Jays aren't going to be the second best in NSCF for much longer. Here's the thing: The Crairg Raid is not a scheme designed to be the most aggressive on offense possible. It definitely shocked me to find this out, but believe it or not, the playbook actually isn't all four verts. It's not like Kelly knows to not do that so as to make the playbook as conservative as an air raid can get, but you take your victories where you can. Don't get me wrong, it's still mostly pass plays, but occasionally with a checkdown thrown in there by the RB. Absolutely revolutionary stuff from the Possession Philanthropist.

Worse yet, Larry Cunningham has no idea who he's throwing the ball to either. His tight end's been replaced by a freshman South Newlandian, all three of his starting receivers are gone in place of three freshmen who had to ask to go to the bathroom a year ago, and even his RB (whom he occasionally throws a checkdown to and never actually runs the ball) is gone too. The good thing with the old core is that they'd had some time to marinate with Cunningham to gain chemistry and learn each other's playstyle. The new offense around Cunningham is not afforded that luxury.

Still, somehow, the Jays are thriving on the offensive side of the ball.

+87 point differential (third overall, behind Cavsar and 3CU) with 165 points scored (second overall, behind Cavsar). That alone is what you'd expect from the Jays' perfect regular season back in NSCF 33, but they're not undefeated either! The Jays, with an entirely retooled offense of whom are still figuring out their major, got held under 20 in a loss to Prince Pieter's and they're still averaging 41 a game. Say it's Mineral cheese, say it's a fraud, say they'll get exposed against the Vanorians, it doesn't matter. This offense (despite not even being all too aggressive) is utterly disgusting. It doesn't have any semblance of a defense behind it to help win games either!

If Larry Cunningham keeps performing like he currently is against "legit" opponents, we might have to start having uncomfortable conversations involving him as an elite QB. Or he could lose those games like his predecessor.

He'll most likely do the latter.

[Elitexis]

ELITEXIS ORIGINS

Location: outside Sadeg, Drawkland
Time: approx. 5 years before NSCF 35

A week later, the Elite Eleven were back in the war room once again to discuss 'Project Home III,' their internal initiative to build a new headquarters. Jaxon Madison was once again at the head of the table, but he was sitting comfortably in his chair. He'd heard from a couple of the guys that they had actual proposals they planned to present at this meeting. Whether that entailed actual presentations or just guys monologuing off of notes on their phones remained to be seen. Either way, Jaxon figured he wouldn't need to rein everyone in. Ideally one or more of the guys with ideas would feel strongly enough to get things rolling without needing a prompt to do so.

Jaxon's instinct was right. After a minute or so of the full eleven being assembled at the table, Mike Rodney stood up from his seat. Once again, the fact that Mike was involved was a little surprising to Jaxon. Was this actual character development on display? Maybe not, but Mike was known for his positive energy ... most of the time.

"Alright, alright. I've been sitting on this for a couple days so lemme just get it out of the way." Mike tapped and swiped a couple times on his phone, which activated the projector in the room and displayed a few drawings on the main screen. "So we said we're all on board with having the living space separate from the working and training space. Here's my idea. I call it 'The Villa.' Basically we each have a rather modestly sized house with a nice buffer of space in between, but we're all in the same area. Like a really big cul de sac or something."

"Did you draw these?" Nicholas Kingston asked, craning his neck to look closer at the screen. The drawings were mostly top-down plans showing different arrangements. One was a huge roundabout, spaced like a clock with a house in each spot, besides one which had an access road. Another had the houses scattered randomly, another was a straight lane, and so on. The drawings themselves were rather crude but legible enough to understand.

"Uh, kinda." Mike looked a little sheepish. "Why do you ask?"

"That's clearly not your handwriting," Nicholas answered. "I can actually read what it says!"

"Okay, okay, Nicole helped a little bit." Mike admitted, grinning despite himself. "I know these plans are for us but obviously I have to consider Nicole when thinking about my own future, yadda yadda."

This earned a small chorus of boos, gags, and retches. They were obviously all for show, and Jaxon could tell that they were well-meaning under the surface.

"Anyway, yeah. Not super in depth, but I think this would be a fun plan for the actual living area." Mike shrugged. "Whatever we decide to do with the rest is up to you all, but I think this is something good to start with. And that way we don't have to spend months arguing about style or furnishing or whatever. We have a standard to start with, then do whatever we want with our own space."

The idea seemed to go over well. Most of the Elite nodded along, and Jaxon noted even the ones who didn't visibly approve didn't seem to have any apprehension about it. That was close enough to consensus.

"Thanks Mike," Jaxon said after a moment of consideration for everyone. "Does anybody else have house-specific plans they want to share?"

"I did," Roger Apollo raised his hand, "but honestly Mike's idea beats the hell out of mine. I was gonna recommend just a double redux of Home I and Home II. Have a slightly bigger Old House for living and a commercial-centric Complex for training and income. But honestly we can scrap the Old House idea. On the other hand, maybe we could get a new Complex that's just rebuilt? Like Nick suggested last week. Might be a little pricey, but we could probably get something bigger than this place. Have a private section for our own training space, but the rest can be public use or whatever we end up doing."

"Do you have a more concrete idea for 'whatever we end up doing?'" Craig Bakker asked with folded arms.

"The way I see it," Nicholas butted in, "we could do it like a trampoline park type thing, where people pay for a few hours of play. And/or, we have it like a gym with a monthly membership."

"Do you really think people are gonna drive all the way out here for a souped up gym?" Trevor Garnet said skeptically.

"I dunno. Maybe." Nicholas shrugged. "We should really try some market research before we do anything anyway. We have the Elite Club for our fans that to get early exhibition ticket access and all that crap. We could push out a survey to them to see if anything sticks. If our most dedicated fans aren't interested then it's probably not worth doing, at the very least."

"Gentlemen," Elias Keys suddenly declared from the other end of the table. "Before we get too far down this path, allow me to present another idea."

Some mutterings of 'here we go' could be heard, but it died down quickly as Elias moved to the front of the room and replaced Mike's pictures on the projector screen. It was now displaying the top of a prepared slide deck.

"You may call me crazy," Elias continued once he had the slideshow staged. "But we're already going to be renovating and rebuilding and probably pouring a dumb amount of money into this project. There will be no better time to try something like this!"

Elias tapped over to the next slide. It was a mishmash of clip art and stock images arranged to evoke the look of an amusement park: a ferris wheel, a roller coaster hill, banners and towers and trees. Across the top of the slide was the title 'Eliteland (name work in progress)'.

"Oh brother," somebody muttered, but Elias seemed undeterred.

"Name and specific details we can work out later," Elias clarified. As he spoke, he continued flipping through the slides, which lined up pretty close to the ideas he spoke of. "I think you're already picking up the basic idea. We put together a multipurpose recreational facility anchored by a classic amusement park faire type thing. Get a couple roller coasters, drop tower, some flat rides, the whole she-bang. We could have the attractions all named after ourselves, stuff that caters to each of us specifically. So that's eleven rides to think up, which isn't a tall task and isn't that expensive in the long run. Then we can have all our other facilities, like that indoor trampoline or parkour park to emulate that Complex redux idea. Maybe a water park too? I dunno, but the point is that we turn this into a major attraction space. The amusement park anchors it, and we fan out from there with anything else we might want or need."

"Do we even have space for a bunch of stuff like that?" Richard Hanson was the first to actually speak up. "Like, before we even think about money."

"Oh yeah, check this," Elias said quickly, flicking through his phone until a particular slide came up. "This is an approximate map here with the zones superimposed over the land parcels we own here. Based on a couple rough approximations of the facilities I'm thinking of, we should have more than enough space. I mean, we've been hoarding and expanding our land here, and for what? We've got well over 500 acres at this point."

"Alright, pull up the budget projections then," Craig Bakker chimed in predictably. "Tell me this isn't going to be the enormous money pit I'm thinking it is."

"It will be pricey," Elias admitted grimly. He tapped a couple more times, bringing up a slide showing a simple ledger. There were a lot of zeros on the final estimate. "We will need investors. But if and when we pull it off, it'll be entirely worth it."

"I don't think it'll be worth it to deal with those scumsucking banks again." Craig shook his head. "Having that axe over our head is awful. Investing all this time and energy into building ourselves up, only to lose it all if we run into financial issues. And if we're dropping this much money on the project, we WILL be constantly worrying about keeping up with the bills again. We still haven't addressed the income consistency issue."

"And the time will come for that," Jaxon warned to stay on topic. "One thing at a time please."

"Here's the main motivation from my point of view." Elias took control of the conversation again. "The idea of expanding into the business world is ultimately to develop our brand. We're trying to turn ourselves into consistent cultural mainstays, mostly so we have the freedom to pursue whatever projects we want and actually make money from it. We all know, though, there's a real chance that Drawkland as a whole gets fatigued with us and we can't ever build back to our peak of popularity. The point here is that we can turn this Eliteland or whatever we call it into a standard attraction. Sadeg will always have a bunch of people. Hell, in a couple decades those stupid predeveloped neighborhoods will finally creep out here and surround our land. If we turn this into a part of the local and regional tourism scene, it can survive and continue to make money even if people don't care about us, the Eleven, as a 'brand' anymore."

That monologue seemed to shift the vibe in the room. Jaxon could see that plainly. Eli wasn't kidding when he said the idea was crazy. That being said, though ... it also wasn't entirely baseless.

"We've always done stuff that people said would never work. That we'd never survive. The barnstorming, the men's league, the maze. Nowadays too, the national teams-"

"We were all there for that stuff too. You're talking about us." Trevor interrupted. "You can skip the movie exposition, man."

"Fair, fair." Elias paused for a second to recollect himself. "As far as the money side of things, we may not have to rely on the banks again. At least not for a majority of the funding. Look, we've got actual friends this time. And some of us more than friends. We're talking immortal professional athletes making a ton of money! Mike, how much is Nicole's contract worth?"

"Uh ..." Mike chewed on his lip in concentration.

"My bad. Jax, how much is Cam making these days in Jaffro?"

"Somewhere between 50 and 60 million," Jaxon answered immediately. "It's distributed a little different each season, plus she's got the incentives and all that stuff."

"Right. She's probably got nine figures holed up right now." Elias tapped his temple for effect. "Shit, think about Jack Hoy! You know he'd be easy to recruit for a venture like this, and word on the street is he's being courted by the GFLB once his RFL contract is up. You know they'll be backing up the money truck to get him to move. He'll absolutely have significant capital."

"If he hasn't spent it all the moment it hits his account," somebody muttered, which earned some laughs.

"Supposedly he's handling his money better now that he's immortal," Ross Hunter added, with the skepticism obvious in his voice. "Either way, doesn't hurt to ask."

"And also, we could entice our friends by having them contribute to the park attractions if they want. Could make it the 'Elite and Friends Experience' or whatever." Elias paused, checking his phone for other slides. "Alright, before I go on, does this sound viable for anyone else? Or am I just wasting my time here?"

There was a pregnant pause in the room. Some guys gave each other looks. Others stared at the ceiling as they collected their thoughts. Jaxon watched with fascination as the emotions of each man fluctuated. Were they really ..?

"I'm just gonna say it. I don't hate the idea." Richard raised his hand.

"I'm going to be 'that guy' again and just simplify it." Craig said, arms still folded. "If we can get serious investors without having to crawl into a bank and beg, then I'm okay with it."

"Easier said than done," Jaxon said softly.

"Yup. And so is this entire idea." Elias shrugged. "If you guys are seriously okay with it, then me and Ross can start putting together legitimate plans. We've got software that can handle the sketches, we can hand it off to an engineering firm or two, see if they can give accurate cost projections."

Jaxon surveyed the room. He was almost surprised with how on board everybody seemed. He didn't hate the idea either, but the near consensus is what surprised him.

"We could at least look into it," Nicholas asserted. "We do have simpler fallbacks that we can probably accomplish in a shorter timeframe before this old thing starts falling apart."

"I agree." Jaxon looked over at Craig to give him his due. "How about we start with floating the idea to our potential investors? We could invite some over, or maybe organize a trip somewhere that we can make sure we meet a few. And me and Mike can talk to our girls to see if they're interested either."

"When's the next Accords meeting?" Septimus Xander spoke up for the first time that day. "We finally showed ourselves off to a lot of the immortals prior to the gala last time. They know our deal now. Some of them may be easy to convince."

"True. I don't know about the next regular meeting, but that's definitely a solid line of thinking, thanks Sep." Jaxon paused, seeing nobody else was forthcoming with comment, and decided to continue. "So. I think we've got a basic concept to work with. Time to hit the road and see if we can make this somewhat realistic, eh boys?"

[Quebec and Shingoryeo]

SAGUENAY FIGHTING IRISH - ATHLETICS DEPARTMENT

NSCF 35: CROSSBOW CLASSIC MATCHES TO BE HELD AT HISTORIC BLUE POINT STADIUM IN EQUINOX HILL, INTEACHAN

SOUTH BEND, SAGUENAY -- The Université du Saguenay and Université St. Croix's athletic departments have announced this morning that for the next two seasons of the NSCF collegiate football, that the Crossbow Classic's spring games will be held at the historic Blue Point Stadium in Equinox Hill, Inteachan, to set a new chapter into the history of the rivalry.

The first of two matchups, hosted by Saguenay Fighting Irish, will take place on the fifth week of the NSCF season in March 2074, while the second matchup, set to be hosted by St. Croix Bleu et Blanc, will take place in two years' time at an undetermined point in Spring 2076.

Crossbow Classic, which annually takes place on the third Saturday of September on the regular Quebecois Intercollegiate Sports (QIS) season, also has a storied history in the NSCF. Every other year, the two representative schools from northwestern Arrosia have taken part in matches against each other in Celestia conference (and before that, Woodlands).

For most of last forty years in the NSCF, St. Croix and Saguenay have played against each other twice, on home-to-home fixtures to set aside from the autumn classics that would take place at the Apple Bowl in Chicoutimi, Saguenay province. Two schools have carried six semifinals and two championship game appearances to their name during their time in the NSCF.

'Playing at the iconic Blue Point Stadium for the future, spring football editions of the Crossbow Classic is one that's been longtime in the making,' said Dr. Kim Gwang-Gook, Dr. Seo In-Yeong Director of Athletics. 'Highest level of international and domestic football is played at the Crossbows Classic, which have been played for 189 years and more editions. They reflect the historicity of the rivalry shared between the two schools, both on the QIS and the NSCF level, and by welcoming everybody to the beautiful province of Inteachan, our future to keep the national brands competitive remains on the agenda.'

'As the province of Saguenay's premier football program, and as one of the foremost in the country, it is essential to have our programs play in the different corners of the country where the highest standards of football could be performed,' said Hong Jeong-Woon, Head Football Coach. 'To have this opportunity present itself in the NSCF, of course, is crucial. It is a globetrotting competition that also involves some of the most esteemed programs out there. By following this, our players and coaching staff will continue to strive for the highest standards that we are expected out of them.'

The 64,000-seat venue, which was opened in the 2004, has hosted many international tournaments. This included and were not limited to the matches of World Cups 73 and 77, many World Bowls, and other international competitions worthy of its stature. Domestically, it has been the home to Q-League's St. John's Arsenal for last 70 years including their last seven domestic titles, and until 2071, have hosted Shelbourne Marroons of the QFL. It remains as the home of the Highlanders team of Commonwealth SupeRugby.

[Drawkland]

Big Eight & Celestia
Week 5

There are already some real contenders emerging in these conferences. The season isn't even half over yet, though. Who's going to keep the inside track in these conference gauntlets?

---

BIG EIGHT
North Penn Tech (USD) 9–19 Cold Hill University (RAN)
University of Raukieff (TMN) 0–13 Richardson University (RAN)
Kallipolis Academy (TMN) 26–7 National Military & Public Services Academy (HOD)
LeBois Santura University (CAD) 40–3 National College of Agricultural Studies (HOD)
Alexandria University (CAD) 36–3 Zaldi Zuria Technical University (HOD)

   BIG EIGHT                                          Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 LeBois Santura University (CAD)                      4    4   0   112   17  +95
 2 Richardson University (RAN)                          4    4   0    98   39  +59
 3 Alexandria University (CAD)                          4    3   1    95   35  +60
 4 Cold Hill University (RAN)                           4    3   1   114   56  +58
 5 University of Raukieff (TMN)                         5    3   2   106   94  +12
 6 North Penn Tech (USD)                                5    3   2   109  122  −13
 7 South Penn (USD)                                     4    2   2   137  128   +9
 8 National College of Agricultural Studies (HOD)       5    1   4    86  155  −69
 9 Zaldi Zuria Technical University (HOD)               5    1   4   101  189  −88
10 Kallipolis Academy (TMN)                             5    1   4    85  121  −36
11 National Military & Public Services Academy (HOD)    5    0   5   105  192  −87

CELESTIA
Northern Moravica University (BNJ) 23–7 Aberstadt State University (KAT)
University of Moravica (BNJ) 12–21 University of Aberstadt (KAT)
Technical University of Holland (BAT) 31–14 Kobale University (GEX)
SapphireCorp University (HKS) 46–20 Lithrelir University (GEX)
Université du Saguenay (QUE) 16–7 Université St. Croix (QUE)

   CELESTIA                                           Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 SapphireCorp University (HKS)                        4    4   0   143   73  +70
 2 Northern Moravica University (BNJ)                   5    4   1   141   79  +62
 3 University of Loyola-Istria (BNJ)                    4    3   1   111   69  +42
 4 University of Aberstadt (KAT)                        4    3   1    70   58  +12
 5 University of Moravica (BNJ)                         5    3   2   119  120   −1
 6 Université du Saguenay (QUE)                         4    2   2    60   94  −34
 7 Université St. Croix (QUE)                           5    2   3   134  108  +26
 8 Aberstadt State University (KAT)                     4    2   2   107   80  +27
 9 Technical University of Holland (BAT)                5    2   3    82   85   −3
10 Lithrelir University (GEX)                           5    0   5    88  174  −86
11 Kobale University (GEX)                              5    0   5    73  188 −115

[Quebec and Shingoryeo]

Mineral Conference and Independents! - Week 5

Cutoff.

MINERAL
Trent State University (TJU) 19–60 Raynor University (VAL)
Green City University (TJU) 6–34 Mar Sara Tech (VAL)
Prince Pieter's College (ROT) 54–7 Uniwersytet Nowa Kalanianska (UNC)
University of Novaaria (SNE) 47–17 Université nationale de Saint-Jean-Jacques-sur-Mer (UNC)
Fusa University (AND) 10–25 University of Columbus-Prairie (DHE)

 #                                                           Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 Prince Pieter's College                                     5    5   0   181   83  +98
 2 University of Columbus-Prairie                              5    4   1   190   88 +102
 3 Rinaldi Naval Academy                                       4    3   1   105   52  +53
 4 Mar Sara Tech                                               4    3   1   112   48  +64
 5 Raynor University                                           4    2   2   115  102  +13
 6 Trent State University                                      5    2   3   117  193  −76
 7 University of Novaaria                                      4    2   2   122  114   +8
 8 Uniwersytet Nowa Kalanianska                                5    2   3   105  157  −52
 9 Université nationale de Saint-Jean-Jacques-sur-Mer          5    1   4   110  180  −70
10 Green City University                                       5    1   4   129  160  −31
11 Fusa University                                             4    0   4    43  152 −109

INDEPENDENTS
Drawk Corps University (DRK) 31–39 Elite Eleven University (EXI)

[Drawkland]

DNSN's College ShowCase!
Fueled by sNAX

NSCF's new 'game of the week' pregame broadcast full of predictions, fan interactions, and just a bit of chalk talk! See this post for context.

After a few weeks of testing the show's viability, it seems that the NSCF community has taken well to College ShowCase! It's done well enough that now DNSN has been able to pick through some viable sponsorship deals and select the best one from the pile. While nice bids were received from some well-known brands like Outbox from Drawkland and even RTC from Banija, DNSN decided to pick a brand that has just recently started expanding their international reach.

sNAX, founded and based in Raikennax, the biggest city in Drawkland's heartland. Raikennax itself stands on the edges of the steppe that dominates western Drawkland, near a major mountain pass leading into the northern territories, around the headwaters of a river that separates two of Drawkland's major territories, and is close enough to the mythic volcano at Drawkland's center that the ancient peak can be seen on the horizon. Because of its strategic location, Raikennax became a hub for businesses that distributed their products across the country. Even in the hypermodern era of today, Raikennax is a teeming population center.

Enter sNAX, a business founded more recently (at least compared to some of the borderline ancient organizations that still call Drawkland home). The sNAX brand primarily produces and distributes snack foods through Drawkland, considered one of the "big two" snack chip companies in the nation. If you walk into a gas station, you'll see a couple shelves of sNAX products. If you go to a half-assed company employee incentive party, there's a 60% chance there's gonna be a variety box of sNAX flavors between the pizza and soda. Most importantly, if you show up to a football watch party and there's a veggie platter instead of a bowl of sNAX chips on the table, it might be worth it to just walk out before they notice you arrived.

DNSN wanted to select a sponsor that felt like a 'fit' for the college athletics scene, reflecting the tastes of the fans that make the programs successful. With how sNAX is nearly ubiquitous in the tailgating scene without having to open the alcohol/drug/gambling can of worms, it was a bit of a no-brainer. Plus, sNAX expanding their business overportal means that they'll have additional marketing opportunities abound.

For at least the rest of this season and next season, DNSN will be running College ShowCase with the tagline "Fueled by sNAX," eschewing the standard 'sponsored' title in favor of one with a little more flair. sNAX product samples will be available as part of the ShowCase gameday festivities for fans that attend, as well as getting favorable ad spots at the beginning or end of commercial breaks during the ShowCase program (and, if possible, the game broadcast itself). Enjoy!

NSCF 35 Week 6: Northern Moravica @ Loyola-Istria

"This one might raise some eyebrows. We're not even at the halfway point in the schedule, and we're already returning to a nation that we visited earlier this season! Walk with us here, though. The first ShowCase broadcast came in Herzegovina City. This one will be in Istria, instead. Not only that, this is the first meeting of the year in this heated in-nation rivalry. Both of these teams only have a single loss. Besides the undefeated upstart SapphireCorp, these two longtime Banijan torchbearers are the leading contenders in an extremely packed Celestia Conference. With how these teams have looked so far this season, whoever survives the Celestia gauntlet may be title favorites come playoff time. We want to keep a close eye on this group!

Hence, we're heading to NMU @ Loyola. The North v South Showdown, featuring ShowCase! The Cougars and Blue Thunder have clashed every year for longer than most non-Drawkians have been alive, and we're excited to watch another chapter of this historic rivalry. Both are championship winners. Both have won the Celestia Conference so many times they're knocking on the door of Utica's record. These are truly blue chip teams in this tournament, and pretty much every game between them promises to be entertaining. Sure, this applies to lots of in-nation rivalries in this competition, but we think that this one takes the cake for week six."

- Rod Barringer, ShowCase host

[The Kytler Peninsulae]

After the two stunning wins over Drawkian opposition, BIU are now in the weird position of being actively expected to Do Things now. Like "win games" and "continue to look like a legit team."

Helpfully, they are now on the part of the schedule where they're facing teams who... aren't that. We still don't know exactly who was on the "University of Apalatci" team that lost in Cobden last week; we also don't know exactly who was on the "Kormania University" team either. This is the kind of chaos that filled the BIU team last cycle when they were rushed to action before they were even 10.93% ready, but now it's their opponents who are in that state while the Herons... are unbeaten?

On one level, that trip to "Borschtslatvia" to face Kormania's "Krashing Boars" - with a K! - was something of an embarrassment for a team that are now meant to be Legit. On the other hand, it was a masterstroke. The Herons controlled possession for over 44 of the game's 60 minutes, and while too many of those drives ended in nothing, it killed time, defensive energy, and the home fans' will to live. The result was literally zero points on the board for the Boars - well that's "Krashing" alright, with or without a K - and, hilariously, two safeties for the Herons, the first opening the scoring after the Herons' initial drive stalled out at midfield before a coffin corner punt set up a Lit Dings sack in the endzone, the second coming in the final minutes as utterly frazzled Kormania QB A. Man bobbled a snap and did well to at least stop an opposition player from dotting it in the end zone first. With the grand non-total of all the Herons drives in between being two field goals (one at the end of the first half, the other with their first drive after the interval), the result was a 10-0 win with five points in each half. Truly a Sickos Instant Classic.

"Obviously we didn't finish our drives the way we should have done today," acknowledged QB Thomas Dillehay after the game. "But at least this happened on a day we didn't need to. Defense showed up big time, they dominated every time and obviously gave us a lot of time in possession, we lacked the killer instinct on the offensive side of the ball but the other unit certainly had no such problems, and ultimately it's the win count that matters and ours just went up again."

The bad news for the Herons is that they'll have to face players we know the names of next. The good news is that there's literally only the bare minimum of them and most of them are band kids, the Clermont University Blue Wave team that competed well in Delaclava domestic play having walked out of training camp in protest against being thrust into the NSCF - with all the travel it means, including a literal interplanetary trip - without what they considered due consultation. Four players - QB Connor Wilson, offensive lineman Daniel Hodges, edge rusher Justin Taylor, and middle linebacker Zach Huffman - broke the strike to give the team something vaguely resembling credibility; the other nine on each side of the ball were recruited from the band or Clermont's music school, and presumably the reserves are too but we don't even know who they are. Or if they exist.

BIU have a few music students of their own - notably including stud tackle Peter Aldean (second-year BA Music and Business Management), who made a point of visiting the Blue Wave players the day before the game. "Mad props to you for putting your bodies on the line when your so-called teammates didn't," Aldean told the group, singling out Wilson for particular praise. "I always said that when people don't wanna work, they're going to face the consequences because somebody else is going to be prepared to do their job. When you get out into the real world, you gotta put that on your CV and the employers are gonna absolutely love that, because - I don't know if the unions call the shots where you are like they seem to here but every smart businessman wants to hire people who try and fire people who cry. And I hope you resent the living daylights out of your so-called teammates for betraying you like this. Good luck to you all tomorrow."

He then went back to a production room in the campus music building and laid down some vocal tracks on a song he'd written this week, "Try That In A Real Job," inspired by the situation. His fellow lineman Charlie Frantzve provided some backing vocals - "it honestly made sense to have a willing amateur on this of all songs" - as the two continued to bond over their shared political values as well as the "job" they've literally implied, on employer property, isn't real.

[Chromatika]

The Clash: The Game

In the first edition of The Clash to be held in gridiron, the Firehawks and the Comets did not disappoint in front of a sold out, passionate crowd in Felswyr as the Firehawks held on at the end to overcome their rivals and preserve an undefeated season. With the weather clearing up near kickoff - ther were some showers in the afternoon - everyone was anticipating the clash between an offensive oriented team with a veteran receiving corps and a defensively minded one with four seniors in the secondary.

First blood would go to the visitors. The way that Desmond Veran and Jakob Steelgarten can basically finish each other's sentences on the offensive side of the ball is a massive plus for the Comets' chances going forward. On a third-and-eight from his own thirty-two, Steelgarten noticed that the Firehawks were going to bring an additional corner - nickel Jerome Vyktin. Steelgarten audibled to have Cade Shield do a block-and-release, and the Junior wideout was able to find the exact spot that Vyktin had started from before the Mountain District defense could fill the space. Steelgarten's pass left his hand right before Vyktin brought him to the field, and the resulting sixty-two yard touchdown pass informed the home crowd that CCCU had come to play.

In the early going, Nicolas Berg had a hard time figuring out the Comets' secondary. It was surmised that having four Seniors in the secondary would give CCCU the edge, and that was true. Two of his first three passes were deflected right before they could get to the hands of his receivers, and the third down pass to Colt Atreus was tackled two yards shy, forcing the Firehawks to punt.

CCCU answered with another drive, this time accentuated by the running of Vatan Vural, their Juinor Running Back. Vural had thirty-eight of the team's seventy yards, with the Comets being barely stopped by a hero play from Ikena Pona, as the Banijan Cornerback recovered from letting Jordan Kimmlser go by him to get a hand in there and knock the ball away from the back of the end zone. Anthony Carter buried the resulting field goal try, and the home fans started to get a bit anxious.

Thankfully, Berg, Swoosh, and Curentino had already made some adjustments. Using Nora Fauske as a decoy to get a defender to follow, Berg started to find Pia Solem, his other Vanorian receiver, who was making short work of linebackers in space. Atreus started to catch some balls thrown his way, and Berg was able to look off Surya Bibi-Stein before finding Solem for a fifteen yard strike to give the home fans something to cheer about. At the end of the First Quarter, it as 10-7, Comets.

Both Archer Allen and Ayla Schröder had big plays on the ensuing Comets drive to force the first punt of the game, and the Firehawks went back to work. A well-timed screen pass to Muhoozi Kadindo yielded thirty-three yards, and despite the Comets' secondary laying down the wood on two passes toward the end zone, the Firehawks cashed in to tie the game with more than seven minutes left in the first half. MDU would score the final points of the first half to go up 13-10, but the game was far from over.

The Comets' secondary was as good as the Firehawks had feared, but Berg was showcasing his ability to take what was given, utilizing his backs as receiving options as well as the threat that was Atreus. Sure, the Comets could have a Safety or a Corner follow the Drawkian, but that would result in unfavorable matchups elsewhere, and so the Comets were having to make some choices on every snap. On the other side of the ball, Steelgarten and Varan were confident that they weren't done scoring points, especially with the way that the Firehawks were committing to playing zone. Pinpoint passes would always find a way to score in zone defense.

When the second half kickoff left the foot of Anthony Carter, nobody expected what was to come. The Comets' coverage unit is one of the best in the NSCF in the early going, and Lena Wollard had not shown that she had the vision to return kickoffs so far. This time, the Junior took the kickoff at the five yard line, made the first tackler miss, and followed a convoy of blockers down the left sideline for a 97 yard kickoff return that gave the Firehawks all the momentum back. Somehow, after being down by ten, the home team was up ten.

The resulting pressure did not help the Comets. They did get the ball past midfield, but were stopped; the Firehawaks made their way to the Comets' thirty-nine yard line, but was stopped on a third-and-one. Instead of going for it, Naia Curentino decided to punt - giving the power to Bilal Ellis, their Junior Punter from Alexandria, Cardenao.

A directional, coffin corner was exactly what the Firehawks had ordered, and with the returner letting the ball go, it bounced at the four yard line before going out of bounds. Perfect.

Freshman Safety Håkon Alvestad stopped Vural in his tracks on first down for a two-yard loss. With the Firehawks selling out on the run, Steelgarten audibled into a screen pass to the back. Alrick Heidelberg, the star Defensive End for Mountain District University, flipped with Isabelle Creer so he would be rushing against Freshman Tackle Andy Powers. Steelgarten snapped the ball, and as Powers was being bull-rushed into the back of the end zone, his left hand grabbed the right shoulder of Heidelberg. The play was whistled dead with a penalty, and Head Referee Justin Martin, more than forty Horizon Conference games under his belt, called Powers for a holding call in the end zone - good for a safety. MDU now had a nine-point lead.

"Special Teams will always be part of the DNA of Firehawks gridiron," promised Head Coach Naia Curentino after the game, "From the days of Sara McAllister and Nellie Katt, we've always honored the third phase of our game. Both the kickoff return from Lena and the coffin corner from Ellis were momentum changing plays that had a huge impact on our win."

To their credit, CCCU did not go quietly into the night. Twelve points down (22-10) with just over a Quarter to go, Steelgarten started to attack the middle of the Firehawks' defense. Olander Wilk and Stephon Hunter aren't meant to guard Tight Ends, and Jerome Hunter's flaw is that he overcommits sometimes. Yevdokiya Trokhymivna Doroshenko was made for situations like this, and the seam route that she ran over Hunter was flawless that put the Comets back into the game. As The Clash entered the Fourth Quarter, the home team had a five-point lead.

The Vanorian Talon - Nicolas Berg, Nora Fauske, and Pia Solem - took over in the first drive of the Fourth Quarter for the Firehawks. Having had Three Quarters of throwing against the elite secondary of the Comets, Nicolas started to read their tendencies. His throws to Fauske and Solem on this drive - two apiece - were in such tight windows that the cornerbacks had no chance of making a play on them. He capped it off with a gorgeous over-the-shoulder fade from the Comets' five yard line that Fauske brought in, and the lead was back to twelve points, the safety looming large.

Once again, Steelgarten was called upon - and once again, he answered. This time, he converted two third downs with his legs, including a scramble on third-and-eight where he stiff-armed Heidelberg. His throw to Doroshenko was right on target, and the Quarterback kept it himself from five yards out to keep the chase on, being down by five.

Nicolas Berg and the Firehawks' offense had a chance to ice the game when they took over with four minutes. Instead, that drive was dominated by one Aaron Thorne. The Senior Ranorian Middle Linebacker stopped Kun Wa Lee's run on first down after a yard, tackled Atreus on a five-yard gain where the Drawkian could've gone for at least ten more, and on a timely middle linebacker blitz, brought Berg down, causing a fumble that the Firehawks were barely able to recover. With barely three minutes left and two timeouts, the Comets would get one last chance.

Kimmsler. Doroshenko. Vural. Three third downs, three conversions. Ball on the Firehawks' nine yard line, less than thirty seconds to go. If they hadn't had the safety, a simple field goal would take the game to overtime - but the lead was five. Steelgarten noted the coverage, pointed out the protection, and snapped the ball. He had Heidelberg bringing pressure again, and stepped to his right. His pass on a corner route to Doroshenko was just barely rushed, and Alexander Haugerud managed to tip the ball away. Twenty-one seconds remaining.

The next play would live rent-free in Steelgarten's head for years to come. He had Ezra Wald alone in the left corner of the end zone, but the inside pressure from Andreas Bøthun was too much, and Steelgarten tried to thread the ball to Nera Pinston to no avail. Seventeen seconds remaining.

On the other side of the ball, Defensive Coordinator Isidora Noles decided to continue to spam the Heidelberg button, lining the Ranorian Defensive End across from Andy Powers once again. Despite Wilson Daniels coming over to help the Freshman, Heidelberg split between them and managed to get a hand on Steelgarten, causing the Quarterback to barely get rid of the ball. Eleven seconds remaining.

Fourth down and goal. Eleven seconds left. Score and be a hero, or fall short and lose in heartbreaking fashion. The Comets went with their usual two-tight end formation. Daniels once again shifted to help Powers. Under center, Steelgarten took a deep breath and then took the snap. He wheeled left, saw Kimmsler with a step on his defender, saw Doroshenko just below him, and threw the ball at the Senior Tight End that already had eight catches for 115 yards and a touchdown in the game.

Freshman Cornerback Ikena Pona, doubling Kimmsler along with Jerome Hunter, recovered toward Håkon Alvestad, who was on Doroshenko. The ball arrived a bit high, but Doroshenko had the jumping reach. As she made the catch, Alvestad clinging to her legs, Pona arrived, and the Banijan's hit on Doroshenko's left elbow was enough to cause the ball to be jarred out.

Game over. Firehawks win - off of a kickoff return touchdown and a safety caused by a coffin corner.

What a game. What a win for Mountain District - and they remain the class of Chromatik collegiate gridiron, for now.

The Firehawks next head to Z'ai'ai to face the Hellcats in a game that the Hellcats absolutely need, having lost twice already. It doesn't truly qualify as a trap game when the Firehawks will absolutely give the Hellcats the attention they deserve. CCCU will enjoy their bye before taking on the same Hellcats.

If this is the level of play that will be expected in the seasons to come, sign us up - The Clash delivered.

[Valanora]

Horizon Conference - Week 6

Cutoff.

Z'ai'ai Institute of Technology (CMT) 13–30 Mountain District University (CMT)
University of Nordhammer (NKR) 10–0 St. Ivor Notre Dame (DEL)
Bitternea International University (KYP) 26–3 Clermont University (DEL)
Cavsar University (DRK) 51–10 Kormania University (BRS)
Drawk Corps University (DRK) 46–10 University of Apalatci (APA)

Ps Horizon Conference                        Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 Mountain District University                5    5   0   144   62  +82
 2 Bitternea International University          5    5   0   156   77  +79
 3 Cavsar University                           5    4   1   238  122 +116
 4 Chromia Central College University          5    4   1   155   52 +103
 5 Drawk Corps University                      5    3   2   155  132  +23
 6 Z'ai'ai Institute of Technology             6    3   3   161  135  +26
 7 University of Nordhammer                    6    3   3   137  158  −21
 8 Clermont University                         6    2   4    62  144  −82
 9 Kormania University                         6    1   5    60  210 −150
10 St. Ivor Notre Dame                         5    0   5    41  110  −69
11 University of Apalatci                      6    0   6    84  191 −107

[TJUN-ia]

Trent State University (TJU) 19–60 Raynor University (VAL)
Green City University (TJU) 6–34 Mar Sara Tech (VAL)

Ouch. Just..ouch.
We hosted both of the traditional Big 2 of Valanora, and all we got from the experience was a combined score of 25-94.
A gutpunch to both schools and college football in this country overall.
Both teams were second best...so there is plenty of work to do.

---

SCHEDULE (MINERAL Conference + 3 Non-Conference)
Week 1: vs Columbus-Prairie (DHE) L 16-45 (0-1)
Week 2: @UNSJJSM (UNC) W 37-27 (1-1)
Week 3: vs Nowa Kalanianska (UNC) W 23-22 (2-1)
Week 4: @Mar Sara Tech (VAL) L 22-39 (2-2)
Week 5: vs Raynor (VAL) - Homecoming L 19-60 (2-3)
Week 6: @Rinaldi Naval (VAL)
Week 7: BYE
Week 8: vs Green City (TJU) - Earth Trophy XX
Week 9: @Prince Pieter's College (ROT)
Week 10: vs Novaaria (SNE)
Week 11: @Fusa College (AMN)
Week 12: Conference Championship Week
---------------------Non-Conference---------------------
Week 13: vs Aberstadt State (KAT/Celestia) - Senior Day
Week 14: OPEN
Week 15: OPEN

SCHEDULE (MINERAL Conference + 3 Non-Conf)
Week 1: vs Fusa College (AMN) W 46-20 (1-0)
Week 2: @Columbus-Prsairie (DHE) L 24-40 (1-1)
Week 3: vs UNSJJSM (UNC) - Homecoming L 22-30 (1-2)
Week 4: @Nowa Kalanianska (UNC) L 31-36 (1-3)
Week 5: vs Mar Sara Tech (VAL) L 6-34 (1-4)
Week 6: @Raynor (VAL)
Week 7: vs Rinaldi Naval (VAL)
Week 8: vs @Trent State (TJU) - Earth Trophy XX
Week 9: @Elite Eleven (EXI/Ind.)
Week 10: vs Prince Pieter's College (ROT) - Senior Day (provisional)
Week 11: @Novaaria (SNE)
Week 12: Conference Championship Week
---------------------Non-Conference---------------------
Week 13: BYE
Week 14: OPEN
Week 15: OPEN

[Valanora]

To say that the start of the season had not gone the way that Sidney Jones had expected it to go might have been a bit of a massive understatement, maybe even the understatement of the entire NSCF season. Sydney was supposed to be leading what was one of if not the very best offensive unit at least in the Mineral Conference if not the entire NSCF and leading the team to retaining the conference crown and being a real championship contender. All the pieces seemed to be there, a good quarterback in herself, a solid one-two punch in the backfield, one of the most stacked wide receiver rooms that has ever existed, and a really good offensive line that could provide protection for her or the backs. On the defensive side, she had seen massive improvements compared to last season's team during best on best drills, the secondary were tough to beat and the defensive line had a real edge to it that should help make the secondary play even better. As far as she knew the special teams was also in good shape but she really did not do much to check in on that unit, she just expected with as well as the coaches helped the offense and defense, that there would be similarity effort there.

All of that put together was supposed to mean that the team was going to run the conference and run it hard, make the schools in TJUN-ia have to work extremely hard to keep up and to give a bit of fright back into the UCP team that had seemingly stopped playing afraid of the Vanorian teams last season. Then week two at Mar Sara happened and everything seemed to unravel, the sprain of her wrist early in the game that had knocked her out of the affair and the team never really recovered from her injury. Listening to that game on the radio had incensed her, it made her blood boil listening to all the cheering from the home crowd at the Rockets suffering and inability to really do anything right on the night. Fortunately it was only one loss and the team had the bye afterwards where she had been allowed time to let her wrist heal, even getting some help from some of her teammates to make sure she had not put any undue strain on the wrist to slow the healing. It was a real team effort and showed that everyone was willing to sacrifice or do a little extra if it meant that they had the chance to be better as a team for it, she could not let her teammates down after that.

Yet the game at home against Rinaldi got a yucked up and their defense was a bit of a nightmare trying to move against, it felt like they were playing a team from Ranoria and not one from the southern coast of Valanora. The fumble at the end of the game when she thought she was having another late game tying or go ahead drives had haunted her dreams the entire week. If she had been a half second faster in her progressions maybe she would have gotten the ball out in time and not lost the ball, maybe she should have tucked it in and scampered for a few yards to live another day, or maybe she could have at least secured the ball as she took the sack. The coaches did their best not to blame her, it had been a bit of a blow assignment that had allowed the Rinaldi player in, yet they also acknowledged she could have done better in securing the football. Two losses from their first three games was going to be a hell of a hole to have to try and dig out of, this conference had a wacky way of being bothersome and having chaotic results. That would prove tricky when the team now needed to be unbeaten the rest of the way, no letting UCP, Trent State, Prince Pieter's pull off an upset.

Of course the next game was a trip to TJUN-ia where the aforementioned Trent State team was awaiting Sydney and the rest of the team, looking to pull off another upset against the Rockets and jostle for position to try and overcome the other team's at the head of the conference. There was fire in her eyes as they were getting ready in the visitors locker room, the past three weeks had been a roller coaster of emotions and now she was simply angry and wanting to take out that anger on someone. "I hope you all are as mad as I am about the way this season has started. We know what our goals are and we know the work that we have to go out there and do now in order to achieve them. That team out there, they think they are our equals, they think they have a real chance of beating us here on their home turf. They scheduled their homecoming for this game, that is how little they actually respect us and how confident they are that they are going to beat us. We might be a bit bloodied from playing our fellow Vanorians but we are far from finished, let us go show them why you should never have the arrogance to schedule the Rockets for your homecoming!"

The roars of support from the rest of her team were deaf to Sydney, she was locked in and she was angry, she had plenty to prove not to anyone else but to herself that she had been worthy of all the praise and hype that had been surrounding her during the preseason. As an outside observer, it looked like one of the most dominant showings that the Raynor team had shown in a few seasons as Jones and the rest of the offense scored on every single one of their possessions. Jones was a woman possessed, going thirty-four of thirty-seven for four hundred twenty-seven yards and six touchdown passes, the offensive line of the Rockets simply dominating at the line of scrimmage. Tobias Svendsen added eighty-two yards rushing, while Kassoum Sakho added sixty-eight yards of rushing as well, and Maia Illytebovich made field goals of forty-two, forty, thirty-five, and thirty-nine yards as the Rockets exploded for sixty points of offense. The defense kept the home team from eclipsing twenty points, which is the measuring stick for the team's defense, as it usually means the Rockets win the game. Now the team returns home to a struggling Green City squad who has to play against an inspired Sydney Jones who looks like they are out to prove a point.

That Green City squad had to take on the Raiders and had bounced back pretty solidly after their shock loss in Rinaldi a few weeks before. Unlike the Rockets who were on an offensive display that would make those in Ranoria turn their eyes away in embarrassment, the Raiders were far more methodical and called off the starters after taking a thirty-one to nothing lead mid way through the third quarter. It was useful snaps for the second units on both offense and defense, with the second offensive unit managing to add a field goal in their three drives with the ball, though the defense allowed two field goals in the four drives that the home team got. The Raiders now have a huge matchup back at home, taking on the last unbeaten team in the conference in the form of Prince Pieter's College from New Rotterdam, a team whose offense looks to test the best defense in the conference that the Raiders boast, even better the Rinaldi's stingy defense. It is strength against strength and the Raiders will be the first of the Vanorian teams to test whether or not Prince Pieter's has earned that top spot in the conference or if they have merely benefited from an easy first half of the schedule, like the belief there is with UCP's record.

[The Batavia]

Flying Dutchmen vs Kobalds
3rd Quarter
10-14

Prior to the end of the first half, the Kobolds managed to get a touchdown every quarter with Holland tech failing to keep up, having to settle for a field goal. Luckily, the Flying Dutchmen will start the second half with the ball.

Boom takes the snap and immediately throws a checkdown to Tight End van Berg for an immediate first down conversion! Next snap, Boom runs the option and passes the ball to Running Back Rood as the SAM tries to stop him, good for another first down conversion! It wasn't until the 4th snap that the Kobold's defense would adjust and prevent the Dutchmen from instantly converting, snuffing Rood for a gain of merely 2 yards, then managing to collapse the pocket forcing Boom to throw the ball away. Now 3rd and down, Boom fakes the handoff before lobbing it for 20 or so yards to Bouwmeester... CAUGHT! Touchdown Dutchmen! And they take the lead with 17-14!

After a successful stop by the Dutchmen defense, with highlight being Ardin Mamluk's deflection a mere moment after the ball left the Kobale quarterback's hands and a touchback, Holland Tech once again gets possession of the ball. Boom immediately starts out aggressive as he scrambles for 15 yards for an immediate first down! It's starting to look a lot like the previous drive as Boom checks down to van Berg once again, but this time only making a gain of 6 yards, before throwing a bullet to Verstappen, who catches a yard pass and adds another 10 yards on top by dodging a Safety before being brought down by a Corner. Then all the sudden, all receivers begin running verticals as Boom throws deep, hitting Bouwmeester's hands who was shortly tackled a mere few yards before the endzone! 1st and Goal. The Dutchmen try to run it in, but Rood is stuffed by the Kobale defense. Then on 2nd and Goal, Roderick runs a screen route wide open, allowing Boom to throw a bullet to the Wide Receiver for the second touchdown of the quarter! 24-14!

Any hope Kobale had of turning the game around was killed the moment Mo Mohammed intercepted a careless throw on the Kobold's own 40+, quickly handing the ball back to Holland Tech. Rood is handed the ball again and rushes for 11 yards. Next first down, it briefly looks like the Kobale Defense finally manages to put pressure on Boom as he is forced to throw the ball away two downs in a row, only for the Receivers to all run verts again on the play action! Boom sees Bouwmeester close to end zone and sends it... TOUCHDOWN! BOUWMEESTER MAKES A SPECTACULAR DIVE IN THE RED ZONE FOR THE THIRD TOUCHDOWN!

The fourth quarter saw no points being scored at all, but the Flying Dutchmen did not see the need to play aggressive anymore, simply killing as much clock as possible and then kneeling the ball to take the win on the road!

Final Score: Holland Tech 31 - 14 Kobale

[Katzeburg]

Life had moved relatively quickly for Student Hal Williams in the last couple of weeks. He had quickly fallen in with his merry band of fellow freshers in his study group - quickly falling into the archetype of the 'older guy who would say something out of touch with the youth, but in a slightly endearing way' (even if Hal himself considered himself to be the unofficial leader of the group and coolest one of the lot - clearly misunderstanding the sarcastic remarks made on a regular basis by Matt and Jerome) - and he had found most of his classes to be quite interesting and beneficial to his own goal of finishing his grand history of the University.

"You know, when I was Dean here I would have sworn lecturers put in a bit more effort than this when teaching classes," Hal said one afternoon as he, Matt, and Jay walked out of their Introduction to Journalism tutorial. The three had just spent the last hour bored out of their minds watching their professor, Professor Sato, clicking through a slideshow of all the successful alumni that he had taught over the years at UoA - talking about what knowledge he himself had imparted; sage advice such as "make notes when interviewing someone" and "make sure to ask for someone's name when interviewing them".

"You were Dean here?" Matt said curiously. "That must be some story sending you from Dean to freshman student - what happened, were you cancelled? Went nuts and was about to go postal?"

Hal shook his head as the three exited the faculty building and entered the wide central courtyard of the university. "It wasn't anything like that," he said. "I had a difference of opinion with the university board, we mutually decided that me leaving would be the best for everyone."

"Mutually decided?" Jay said. "Why would they allow you back then? Surely if you got fired they would request you stay away from the campus."

Hal frowned. "I wasn't fired." Matt and Jay looked at each other for a moment. They knew that Hal was slightly exaggerating just how he departed the University last year. After all, it had been all over the Lampoon - the UoA campus paper. Despite it being mostly satirical in nature, there were a couple of pages at the back with actual journalism in them; mostly written by seniors angling for an actual job post-university. Hal continued on. "Anyway, the reason I'm allowed back is more simple than that - most of them don't know. From my experience, the mature age students don't get looked over in the same way as younger students. I doubt that more than five people have seen my name on the student register as of yet." Chuckling to himself, Hal slung his backpack off his shoulders and held it in front of him - opening it up to put in his textbook which remained unused from Professor Sato's tutorial.

"So, you've just come back to study then?" Matt said. "Wouldn't you have other things to do than just reskill?"

"Yeah," Jay agreed. "There's an old guy at the BrautBox south of campus who was always complaining about reskilling after he was fired from somewhere, maybe you are just doing what he wanted to do?"

Hal bit his tongue in an attempt not to blurt out that the 'old' man was indeed him, waiting for a moment before leaning in towards Matt and Jay. "Well, there is something I am working on here outside of the book..."

"What is it?" Jay whispered. "It better not have anything to do with the Treeman."

"The- The Treeman?" Hal said with a dose of heavy confusion.

"Yeah, the Treeman," Jay reasserted. "It's a man who is half-tree, half-man, half-serial killer. It's been all over the Lampoon."
"That's three halves though, Jay," Matt interjected.
"Things can have three halves. Hockey has three halves."
"Those are called periods dude."
"Same thing, no?"

"It's not the Treeman!" Hal yelled, snapping the two younger students back to reality. "I'm... investigating the university itself."

"For.... your book?" Matt said. "We know already man - is your memory alright?"

"No- No. Not just for my book. It's something else. Something which would blow the lid off the school entirely."

"Well, what is it?" Jay asked, his voice quavering with fear that it would indeed be something about the Treeman.

"Yes, please do enlighten us Mr Williams, we're all curious." Someone else was listening in on their conversation. Hal spun around to find none other than athletic director Ed Matthews standing in front of the three students. Hal's mouth opened slightly, half out of confusion, half out of shock, and half out of the need to whir his brain into action to think of a convincing lie as to why he was back on the UoA campus.

"Hey, Ed - how ya' doin?" Hal said, faking a big grin. "You will not believe the week I've been having - you ever heard of a thing called the Treeman?"

Jay squeaked in terror.

---

Mixed bag from Banija as Katzeburg sides remain in Celestia mix

By Daniel Coleman, The Aberstadtian Sports

The Celestia Conference race continues to tighten as both Katzeburgian schools return from Banija with vastly different results as the conference approaches the half-way mark.

After their shock overtime loss to the University of Aberstadt Ducks at Seecester Stadium, the NSCF reigning champions Northern Moravica University hosted the Aberstadt State University Swans and were out for blood and a return to winning ways, which they did with a relatively short work win over the Swans in a 23-7 victory at the Mugisha II Memorial Stadium. The Swans never looked like seriously challenging the Cougars, with the sole soft point for the visitors coming into the fourth quarter through freshman wide receiver Brandt Fenn, collecting a lofty air throw from fellow freshman and quarterback Bert Robertson to head into the endzone off a 12-yard passing play. The touchdown was too little, too late to spark a late fightback, leaving the Swans staring down a .500 record after four games at the NSCF level.

"I'm not too disheartened about the final result as we always knew just how tough of a game NMU would give us," ASU head coach Thomas Cartwright told media post-game. "Coach McKendry would have demanded a response after that loss to the Ducks and unfortunately for us, we stood in their way and beared? Borne? Bore? Bore. We bore the brunt of that response. But we still gave them a game, and to take the reigning champions in their own home and hold them to only a handful of touchdowns shows the progress we've made so far since rising to this level. We've gotta recoup and turn our focus right to the next game against UoM as we finish out the Banijan gauntlet - they're a quality side and as a fellow school jumping to this level for the first time this season, they're out to impress as well. I'm expecting a real good game at Aberstadt Stadium this weekend as a result - we've both got a bit to work on coming off losses but it will be a great test for us as a programme to see how we're travelling against a fellow new school."

The University of Moravica of course, were handed that loss by the University of Aberstadt Ducks, who picked up their first away win of the season in a 21-12 game over the Golden Bears at George Lampda Field. It was a strong follow up performance from the Ducks after their win over the Cougars, with sophomore quarterback Wright Hafner continuing to show how far he's come as an on-field leader since the limited game time he got last season. Hafner was instrumental in the Ducks' attacking returns, throwing a short touchdown via wide receiver Arlen Ferber and spinning the ball wide for a pair of touchdowns for freshman running back Padrig Martin to storm over the line and secure the victory for the visitors. But it was the defence which again was the star of the show, with sophomore defensive end Thad Sadler continuing his strong season in the defence with a pair of sacks on Golden Bears quarterback Ella Solberg and forcing a fumble through a heavy tackle to rattle the hosts and ply on the pressure from the get-go. Senior defensive tackle Will Spellmeyer and linebacker Vincent Paris also made a number of big plays to keep the scores low, with the Ducks currently the best performing defensive unit within the Celestia Conference, having conceded just 58 points across their opening four fixtures (NMU could also lay claim to this stat with 79 points conceded across their five games so far - but we here at the Aberstadtian are tipping it in favour of the head-to-head winners).

The win completes the Banijan gauntlet for the Ducks, with the University of Aberstadt taking a 2-1 record out of their three games. With the Ducks sitting in fourth in the conference, head coach Geraint Short feels its still too early to consider the side a championship contender.

"Now I just wanna say a big hold your horses there about any of this championship chat," Coach Short told media this week ahead of their clash against the Technical University of Holland. "This year's Celestia is one of the most stacked lineups in history - we're talking Valanora at the World Cup level stacked lineup here - and there's so many quality teams, to talk about who will and who won't make the title game after five matchdays is like decorating a cake when you've not yet popped it in the oven. Things will go wrong and you'll be left burnt. That's not to say I don't love the spirit - and we're 3-1 which is a lot better than being 1-3 after four, especially if you told me we'd be there coming out of three games against Banijan schools and a derby against our up river rivals. But this is a marathon, not a sprint - while it's nice to have our head around so many quality programs, we're not sticking our feet up just yet.

"We're building some momentum, but we need it to be like a flower rather than a succulent plant. You need to check on it and nurture it day in day out, rather than just leave watering it on gamedays. Picking up a win is good and there's nothing like a good feeling, but we're gonna keep nudging things in the right direction and see where we shake out. We've got more work to do than a Government Commission into Katzeburgian Football, but this group is up for the fight and we saw that over in Banija on the weekend. We went into a loud house and was more destructive than a cat chasing a laser pointer - it was a bit of a mess at times, but we hit the right spots when we needed to and ended up catching that red dot of a victory."

The Ducks return to Seecester welcoming a Technical University of Holland side which after starting 0-3 is on an upswing of form - beating both Grand Exultian schools to be two wins on the bounce and aiming to replicate their trip to Seecester last season and pick up a second straight away win against the Ducks. UoA lost 14-3 that time out, a rare home mis-step in their debut campaign, but with the side storming to a pair of wins over quality Banijan opposition in recent weeks, the mood seems to be shifting at Seecester once again.

"Holland Tech are a side which on their day could be better than anyone else in the conference," Short continued. "We saw that last season when they played us off our own park. But we've grown a lot since then and we're up to prove ourselves against them once more - it's always a big ask in the Celestia but you need to be at your best every single down of every game if you wanna be at the top. And that's where we want to head as a group."

While the Ducks open as favourites for their clash against the Flying Dutchmen, up river the Swans have opened the odds as slight underdogs against a UoM side which will be keen to return to winning ways and conference championship contention with a win - while there is still a lot of football to be played, a third loss for either of ASU or UoM may put an early end to any hopes of a championship appearance in their debut campaigns.

[Ranoria]

When in Raukieff: Governors Shut Out 3-1 Pilgrims


After nearly getting fraud checked here a year ago, Richardson took care of business in New Tamrind

Last season's trip to Raukieff had completely different implications. Sure, the Governors themselves were still undefeated, but the Pilgrims had been 0-4 going against a championship hopeful Richardson team led by MoP favorite Dex Banka at quarterback. Regardless, it was a thriller, with the Governors offense suffering from GOS* for most of the game just to come roaring back to life at the final bell with 7 completions and three touchdowns on just 8 passes in the final five minutes.

Here in NSCF 35, Raukieff's stadium had a bit more to be excited for than a potential upset. The team was 3-1 going into this showing and had a real shot at a Big 8 championship berth. The holy blue and heavenly white clad crowd in Raukieff Colosseum was louder than they had been a year prior coming in - unfortunately for them, the Governors took no chances this time around. The defense was absolutely perfect - Levi McNair and Terrance Savage led a dominant unit to its first shutout of the campaign with an interception and pass deflection from the former and a pair of sacks from the latter. Offensively, well, GOS still seems to be a trend in this stadium when the Governors come to town, but it wasn't enough to put any real tension on the game.

"We missed opportunities on both sides of the ball," head coach Kasen Harrowitz insisted after the game, "Walking away with the win is good, we know how hard it can be to play in New Tamarind."

RIchardson's insanely run heavy offense certainly lends itself more to ball control than it does high scoring affairs - and it's worked to this point. Vincent Hwang-Dalbec has carried the load, with 18 carries for 90 yards in this one while Jack Archer, Duke Miller, and a returning Steele Buchanon all got their opportunities as well. Richardson fans were surely happy to see the Dhemixian of course - after a run in with Derek Boss that some were beginning to theorize had been lethal, he's back on the sideline and carried the ball twice in this one.

So, having overcome a team that almost dismantled them a season prior, Richardson now has two weeks before their next big test against the 4-1 LeBois Santura squad. DK3 is still one of the most intriguing talents in the sport, and even as dominant as this Governors defense is, no one is expecting them to come away with a win in Cardenao without this run game picking up. But their own superstar assured them he'd be ready.

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Two Way Star:
Vincent Hwang-Dalbec Will Take Richardson To The Promised Land

When we sat down VHD for an interview, the only thing on his mind was the game with the Broncos in two weeks.

"Biggest game of the conference stage for me," Vincent Hwang-Dalbec, who led the team in tackles for a second straight week, insisted. "I've got two direct rivals on the field in LeBois. One at quarterback, one at linebacker. It's not just matching up and beating the guy across the line from me, it'll be my job to outperform the other guy when he's on the sideline, too."

The running back / linebacker two way star is certainly making his waves - and while this loaded backfield that spreads carries around may be limiting his statsheet, his impact is undeniable. In 5 games, Hwang-Dalbec has taken 99 carries for 444 yards with five touchdowns, and he's second on the team with 42 tackles - six for a loss. If Richardson is to break through for their third NSCF Championship - or even their sixth conference title - it will be largely on his shoulders.

"I want to be the best there's ever been. I'm a two way player in the best conference at the highest level of college football, I need to make a statement." And that he has. Interviewing coaches who've had to face the undefeated Richardson's star player, they've said "We send guys to triple team him, but two of those guys are just emotional support for the first guy's mom."

We asked this anonymous Big 8 coach to clarify, and he showed us a play of Hwang-Dalbec breaking the collarbone of one of his defenders with a vile stiff arm. "Yeah, this guy? He was just a sacrfice. What do you want me to do? Put another guy on in the box? It's like removing another cup from the ocean. Loading the line of scrimmage just pisses him off more!"

And while it's certainly true that Hwang-Dalbec hasn't been able to rip off a ton of those highlight worthy explosive plays this season, that's certain to change at some point. Selling out to stop Richardson's ground game - which has yet to net anyone a win regardless - will eventually lead to those plays when he does break through the line. To this point, it's been Jack Archer benefiting the most from running through traffic - but only after Hwang-Dalbec's more vicious running style wears the defense down enough for Archer to tee off on a banged-up front seven.

---

In Cold Hill, new head coach Theodore Galstian’s first campaign continues to run smoothly - even if a 19 point offensive game wasn’t exactly in the script. Derek Boss continues to dominate on the defensive side, rallying the troops to hold North Penn Tech to just three field goals - one forced off a goal line TFL by the reigning DPOY, who denied a second red zone opportunity with an interception

[Banija]

Live from the set of the DNSN College Showcase, show host Rod Barringer is sitting with Loyola-Istria head coach Dennis Zervos

Rod Barringer: ... "And now, to the next segment of the College Showcase! We're bringing on a man who, for so long, has been synonymous with Loyola football. A former legend- and NSCF Champion, as well as NSCF Most Outstanding Player- when he was a quarterback here. A two-time NSCF Champion as an offensive coordinator. The scion of a stud alumnus. And WInter Bowl champion as a head coach. Folks, here on Loyola's campus, let's give a big and rousing welcome to... Loyola-Istria head football coach, Dennis Zervos!"

Dennis Zervos walks onto the set, as the Loyola fans who are attending the showcase live all cheer loudly for the popular head coach. The two exchange pleasantries, and then Dennis Zervos stands up to lead the crowd in a rousing rendition of the Loyola fight song, The Blue Thunder Shall Strike Today. When the crowd is done singing, Barringer keeps speaking.

Rod Barringer: "Well Coach, like I said- thank you for joining us. While in Banija, the North v. South Showdown means everything- can you speak on the ferocity and intensity of this rivalry for those who are not familiar with it? Why, every single year, is this such a tremendous contest?"

Dennis Zervos: "This rivalry, in this country, truly is one of a kind. Even if you're not a fan of either school- everybody, across Banija, picks a side. And here in Moravica, especially, it is blood that runs very, very deep. As everyone knows, I grew up with Loyola blood in my veins. My father played here- so I've been a regular at the Istria Lightning Yard since, quite literally, I was born. And in all of those years of my childhood- we always wanted to beat Northern Moravica. A hated rival, a massive rival- and hell, even when I played here, ijn NSCF 13 and 14, that was before Richardson U- those Ranorian bastards (editor's note: he'd get fined by the Banijan authorities for swearing on TV) were on the schedule every year. Without rivalries, this sport simply does not mean as much- they are the lifeblood of college sports, and I promise you- lightning is striking the visitors tonight." (A big cheer from the crowd as they react to the last line).

Rod Barringer: "You guys beat them last year, at their house, in OT- with your QB making his second career start. But then, you guys lost to them in the Celestia conference title game, as they went on to win a national championship. What happened there?"

Dennis Zervos: "Everybody knows, that beating the same team twice in a single season is a pretty difficult task. But it showed- last year was a major step forward for this program, even if we didn't finish with our goal of winning the NSCF championship- one that we are obsessed with here in Istria. They always have said that Loyola lacks toughness, that we lack the mental edge, that NMU is simply dripping in it- but that's not true at all. Obviously, they won the title last year, and they're the defending champs until someone beats them in the playoffs. But here at Loyola, we got that same edge, we got that same amount of grit. I'm a strong believer in the talent that we are putting out on the field- with dudes like Leslie Allin throwing the ball to guys like McNair and Feliciano, we're capable of being explosive in any and all situations.

So what happened last season, ultimately, is history. Is history important? Absolutely. But is it a perfect determiner of the future? The answer to that, of course, is no. It's a new year, new season- we are much improved in so many different facets. We showed our late game ability a couple of weeks ago, against U of A= a legitimate conference title contender, who only has one loss, a game where we trailed, 7-6, in the second half- and yet, pulled out a 16 point win in the end. Our trip to ASU, of course, did not go as planned. But we've spent the last couple of weeks cleaning up from those lessons we learned- particularly, on the offensive side of the football. 17 points, in a conference this deep, is not going to be enough against the best teams in this conference- we have to be more consistent with moving the ball, and scoring, and I believe that the world will see the fruits of our efforts during the North v. South Showdown.

Rod Barringer: "Coach, the Celestia Conference has been criticized for its lack of depth in recent years- but this season, the old narrative has seemingly been turned on its head. This conference suddenly seems to to be the deepest conference in the sport- how does that effect your outlook tonight?"

Dennis Zervos: "Well, it simply shows that we are in for what is surely to be a brutal competition. Obviously, the Quebecois schools have always been excellent- and the Grand Exultian schools have talent. Now, with the new pair from Katzeburg, we know that the two schools from Aberstadt are going to be contenders to reach Busukuma, year in, year out. And then, I cannot give enough credit to SapphireCorp- a brand new school, and suddenly, they sit with a fantastic 4-0 start to the season, sitting in sole possession of first place in the conference. The Celestia's last unbeaten team. While this conference is nearly guaranteed to come down to a bunch of games on week 11, that means the winner of this game will have a huge leg up in the chase to Busukuma.

The Moravican schools are done playing the Aberstadt schools. But tough games remain. The winner of this game is going to have an inside track, on getting at least one of those two spots in Busukuma. While the loser? Will be in the middle of the pack- and fall behind both the University of Aberstadt, and SapphireCorp- maybe to a devastating amount. There's still a lot of conference games left, but would you rather be trying to keep your place in the upper echelon of teams in the conferences? Or relegated to the mushy middle? I know my answer."

Rod Barringer: "If you had to compliment Northern Moravica, what is one thing you would compliment them on?" (At this question, the Loyola crowd started booing- and started an anti-McKendry chant).

Dennis Zervos: "Well, you know, I'll give 'em credit- they won the title, and they got the trophy to show for it. But the premier program- in Moravica, in Banija, in the Celestia- is, and always has been, the University of Loyola-Istria." (Big cheers again). "We're gonna prove that on the field tonight- everyone's had their shots at Loyola, but today will be a statement, loud and clear- everybody knows we've got the best fans, the best environment- and now, we're gonna have the best damn team on the field, too."

The interview continues with more lighthearted questions, before Dennis Zervos is eventually allowed to leave and go back to talking with his team

---

Hannah Mckendry, NMU head coach, standing on the field during warmups, about an hour before kickoff

Hannah McKendry looked out into the crowd- the stadium was starting to fill in. Pretty soon, there'd be 100,00+ in the stadium, all wearing white, all ready to cheer on the Blue Thunder- and give one of the most electric environments that college football has to offer. And her players at NMU would need to be ready for that. But her players at NMU, fortunately, had been responding so far to the challenges that had been sent their way. They sat at 4-1 so far on the season, with a tough, double overtime loss to the University of Aberstadt in Week 4 being the only blemish on their record so far. They actually responded quite well at home- holding the shutout well into the fourth quarter, leading 23-0 in a game that they eventually won, 23-7, over ASU.

As always, however- the toughest games for this squad were ahead. This game, chief among them. The way the Celestia was playing out, she knew- while the winner of this game would be a huge favorite to reach the Celestia conference title game, the loser of this game would have a much more difficult path to do just that- not impossible, of course, but more than likely to be reliant on an at-large playoff berth, rather than an automatic one earned, with a trophy to boot. This was, unfortunately, even more true for NMU than Loyola- NMU's loss being to the University of Aberstadt was seriously unfortunate. Of course, last season, the two ended the season against one another, in a game where the winner would go to the conference championship gmae- and NMU went to Seecester and dropped 40 on the Ducks. This year, no Horton, big problem- a trio of FGs, only two of them in regulation, as the Cougars didn't even reach the end zone once- despite her usual aggressive approach.

Why did it matter that the loss was to the Ducks? Well, U of A also had one loss- but they had now played all three Banijan schools, as well as their compatriot Aberstadt school. Those four of the toughest schools in the conference- and they sat at 3-1, while playing the teams ranked 2nd, 3rd, and 5th in the conference- the only bottom half team being ASU. That meant they were likely to rack up quite a few more wins- and if NMU lost this one, any chance of trying to win a tiebreaker scenario with U of A, towards the end of the season, would be incredibly tough. It was that kind of recognition why McKendry knew that she needed to be aggressive at the brand new Seecester Stadium- so no regrets, despite the approach not working.

"Hey coach." Said the team's QB coach, Sebastian Kabuye, walking up to her. He, of course, was also her husband- so they usually talked quite a bit in the pregame.

"Hey Seb." She said to him. "How's Amy looking?"

"Man- I freaking hate these bastards." Sebastian said back. "You know how nice it was last year, when we smacked them around in Busukuma and they had no idea what hit them? We gotta drive their asses into the ground- I'm sick and tired of hearing about how Loyola's back, every single year, before MDU beats them by 25 and then they give up 1,000 points in the second round of the playoffs."

Coach McKendry laughed. "C'mon, Seb. They could get back there."

"Yeah, right." He responded. "We've got a better shot at the Busoga Islands winning World Cup 101, than Loyola winning NSCF 35." They both laughed again.

"Ok, ok- but we know we need to be locked in. This is a freaking good team over there, most unfortunately." She told him. "We know they're gonna choke in the playoffs, but this is the regular season- where they shine. Worst of all, those bastards have our damn trophy." Sebastian Kabuye spit on the ground when McKendry said that. This was a trophy rivalry, of course. NMU had beaten them in their last matchup, but the trophy only changes hands during regular season matchups. So any playoff games, or conference title games, per the rules of the trophy, don't have the trophy handed over to the winner. So, despite NMU winning the last matchup, the rivalry trophy remains in the Istria showcase.

"Trust me, we're doing- hey, Linus!" The NMU lead HB was jogging by them two. He stopped, to say hi.

"Coach Seb, Coach Hannah." HE nodded to each of them. "What's up?"

"How you feeling, Linus?" Coach McKendry asked him.

"Fantastic." He said in response. "You know, I'm motivated as hell today. I let the team down when we went to Seecester Stadium- the Ducks had us bottled up at every turn, and I didn't do near enough to help Amy. I know you expect better of me running the football, and I promise, I'm not somebody who is only elite at the ground & pound game at home. We can win these big road games, and I personally guarantee you, I'm leaving everything on the field today. I've been studying film, been doing more- I put more on my shoulders, and can't let a loss like that happen again, where we're so lifeless on offense."

"Thank you, Linus- keep working out." McKendry liked his answer. She gave her husband a quick peck on the cheek and then walked towards some of the defensive players. They knew that their gameplan, built around the ground game, was a strong strategy to take this crowd out of it, and most importantly- bring that trophy back to Herzegovina City. She was ready for her squad to do it- and hopefully, the visitors would have a very, very memorable trip to Loyola-Istria.

[Hooksland]

SAPPHIRECORP NEWS - PREMIUM SUBSCRIPTION
Vol. I - NSCF 35 - Priority Coverage

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McCarthy Plays Lights Out Against Lithrelir as the Merchants Route the Phoenixes 46-20
In a near-perfect outing, the star quarterback completed 25 of her 35 passes for 340 yards and five touchdowns.

By Sherri Frost | Week 5

Sapphire City rallies around their undefeated Merchants and beloved quarterback Maria McCarthy with another sold-out home game at XtraCola Stadium.

SAPPHIRE CITY - The SapphireCorp University Merchants (4-0) offense had another stunning game, dropping 46 points on the struggling Lithrelir University Phoenixes (0-5) this Saturday. The offense combined for six total touchdowns, five of which were delivered through the air by Maria McCarthy in her most well-rounded game yet this debut season in the NSCF. The win both keeps SapphireCorp's undefeated run alive, as they remain the only undefeated team in the Celestia conference, as well as officially moves SapphireCorp to first place in the Celestia conference. Those that have followed previous NSCF seasons have been quick to caution early-season overconfidence, citing specifically the still-forthcoming games against the promising Katzeburgian schools and the prolific Banijan schools, but the general public response to the Merchants' early success has been absolutely electric in Sapphire City. Despite Sapphire City historically having more enthusiasm for their professional sports teams, the amount of hype that the Merchants have brought to the city after joining the respected NSCF has been impossible to miss.

Unlike the nail-biter in Joongyeong last week, Merchants' victory was never in doubt this game. Merchants fans have McCarthy to thank for that, going 25/35 for 340 yards and five touchdowns, with no interceptions. Now with a 14/2 touchdown to interception ratio, McCarthy truly looks unstoppable in her current form. That much was at least true against Lithrelir, as McCarthy punished the Phoenixes' defense all night long, even adding on a 2-point conversion on her legs early in the 2nd quarter to put the Merchants up 22-0. After the game, she remarked on her performance:

Yeah, it was an incredible game tonight. Our O-Line has all of my love, they kept me safe all night long. We were able to get out there and get the job done, and that's all you can ever ask for coming into a game. I had time to make all the right choices, and it played out perfectly. I mean- our talent at O-Line, our talent at receiver, we just have an incredibly talented unit out there and, if you give us the time, we're going to make sure you pay for any slip-ups. Our defense got out there and did their job too, they really gave us a lot of chances to capitalize on the opportunities they created, and it feels good to show them that their hard work results points for us. I'm really so thrilled to be surrounded by so many wonderful people, it's fulfilling in a way I can't express. We're here to win, and I think people know that by now.

Wide receiver Louise Jackson once again lead the team in receptions and receiving yards, as well as kept her touchdown streak alive, catching 7 of 11 targets for 88 yards and two touchdowns. The redshirt senior joins McCarthy in having another outstanding season for the Merchants, as many readers will remember their incredible run last year in the HCFA resulting in a Hooksland national championship victory. Even though there was considerable hesitation on making any NSCF predictions before their maiden campaign, the duo has concretely shown that they still have what it takes to put up the incredible numbers we saw last year and burn defense in similar ways. Though the conference stage is not even halfway over at this point in the season, McCarthy and Jackson have proven to be a lethal force to plan for.

Wide receiver Donovan Hartman also continued his surprisingly impressive rookie season against the Phoenixes. After garnering considerable recognition both within and outside of the Merchants organization for his performances the first three games of the season, the Merchants have decisively begun to throw the ball his direction more often. Accumulating only one fewer target than Jackson this game, Hartman finished with 5 catches on 10 targets for 65 yards and a touchdown. While concerns about his hands have started to be levied against him, his production continues to dazzle. In the end, Hartman still looks like a rough gem; he has incredible potential with break-neck speed, but is currently unpolished and clumsy. Luckily for him and the Merchants, though, his benefits clearly seem to outweigh his present shortcomings.

Among the other touchdown receivers are tight end David Carey and runningback Erik Warner, the latter catching a checkdown on a flat route before trucking through a group of defenders and darting the rest of the 42 yards to the end zone for a score. Warner also contributed 80 yards and another touchdown on the ground. Still yet to surpass 20 carries in a game, Warner remains an extremely efficient back, averaging over four yards a carry. The massive tight end, on the other hand, had a relatively quiet game, as is the norm in the Merchants' game plan, mostly assisting with blocks for McCarthy; though his 8-yard grab late in the 2nd quarter shows that his imposing frame can still go out and snag uncertain balls when McCarthy needs it.

Though the defense allowed the Phoenixes to score three touchdowns, the Merchants defense performed admirably and kept the game from turning into a shootout. Lithrelir seemed forced to adopt a more pass-heavy style than usual, which had its benefits in the form of a remarkable 45-yard touchdown, though it also put the Phoenixes on uneven footing resulting in a 1st quarter interception by Gavin Nelson and multiple drives killed by incompletions. Lithrelir was simply unable to manage the same kind of numbers against the aggressive Merchants defense that SapphireCorp was able to, seemingly easily, put up on offense. Star defensive end Sasha Deshpande tacked on another sack to her season while harassing the Lithrelir offensive line all game, but she was surprisingly eclipsed by Seth Day, who managed to reach the opposing quarterback three times for 2.5 sacks on the night. Day, a redshirt junior, is usually an afterthought on the Merchants' defensive line with Deshpande taking all of the credit, but he made himself known tonight with dominance. Surely assisted by Lithrelir's desperate attempts to slow Deshpande, many are still very excited for Day's future, as he will be deciding on whether to declare himself available for the Hooksland Professional Football League (HPFL) draft or return to the Merchants for one more year this off-season.

In worse news for Merchants fans, however, it was confirmed that standout safety Marinette Hernandez suffered a concussion late in the 1st quarter, and she will likely have to sit out 2-3 weeks while she recovers. Hernandez was reportedly devastated at the news, but based on the footage of the injury, it appeared rather severe, and many fans are not surprised by the announcement. Hernandez has already logged an interception and many tackles and pass deflections this season, so the news of her injury is quite significant for the Merchants defense. We will have to see how defensive coordinator adapts to her absence in the weeks to come.

Next week, the Merchants (4-0) will be taking on the Kobolds from Kobale University in Grand Exultia (0-5). Remember to stay subscribed to SapphireCorp News for the highest quality coverage of your Merchants!

1st Quarter

SCU: Louise Jackson 15-yd pass from McCarthy (PAT good) — SCU 7, LIT 0
SCU: Erik Warner 6-yd run (PAT good) — SCU 14, LIT 0
SCU: Gavin Nelson INTERCEPTION (3-yd return) — SCU 14, LIT 0

2nd Quarter

SCU: Donovan Hartman 22-yd pass from McCarthy (McCarthy run, 2-pt conversion GOOD) — SCU 22, LIT 0
LIT: Jaxon Thorne 45-yd pass from Vance (2-pt conversion FAILED) — SCU 22, LIT 6
SCU: David Carey 8-yd pass from McCarthy (PAT good) — SCU 29, LIT 6

3rd Quarter

LIT: Kaelen Vance 4-yd run (Kick good) — SCU 29, LIT 13
SCU: Brody Smiley 38-yd FG — SCU 32, LIT 13
SCU: Erik Warner 42-yd pass from McCarthy (PAT good) — SCU 39, LIT 13

4th Quarter

SCU: Louise Jackson 9-yd pass from McCarthy (PAT good) — SCU 46, LIT 13
LIT: Silas Reed 12-yd pass from Vance (PAT good) — FINAL: SCU 46, LIT 20

FINAL: SCU 46, LIT 20

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SapphireCorp News -- NSCF 35

[Dhemixia]

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The Columbus Dominion(Est.1873)
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Devon Thompson vs. Larry Cunningham; an uncomfortable conversation that needs to happen

Schedule

*blue indicates home games
Week 1: @ Trent State W 45-16
Week 2: vs. Green City W 40-24
Week 3: @ Prince Pieter's L 19-21
Week 4: vs. Novaaria W 61-17
Week 5: @ Fusa College W 25-10
Week 6: @ Elite Eleven
Week 7: vs. UNSJJSM
Week 8: @ Nowa Kalanianska
Week 9: vs. Mar Sara Tech
Week 10: @ Raynor
Week 11: vs. Rinaldi
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Non-conference play
Week 11: BYE
Week 12: @ Bitternea
Week 13: vs. Fluff State

Two cycles ago, in NSCF 33, freshman quarterback Larry Cunningham stepped into the starting job ahead of Atkinson's backup, Devon Thompson. The move was wildly unpopular amongst Dhemixians, it was the kid's first experience at the helm of a college team, and Thompson had sat there through every playoff win in program history. That is, it was unpopular until he had an undefeated regular season. Then he won the second ever Mineral title for UCP. Then he beat Sadeg State. We won't talk about how that season ended, but as soon as the offseason hit, Devon Thompson saw the writing on the wall. A junior, he knew he wasn't going to win the job over the wonderkid that had fallen into the lap of UCP after the season he'd just had. With nothing left to do, Thompson opts for the nuclear option and enters the transfer portal citing playing time issues.

His critical miscalculation is his assumption of how good he actually is. That is, to say, not very.

Fast forward to the end of the offseason, and Thompson's DMs are emptier than Craig Kelly's bed. Going back on his word and asking UCP if they'd have him back, they very obviously said no. The only options he had? Become the starter at an Outbox drive-thru or take a flier and play left bench his senior year at Richardson. Possibly the only man more delusional than UCP fans themselves, he opts for the latter.

Turns out, the grass wasn't actually greener on the other side for Thompson. In fact, it was vaguely energy drink-colored.

Thompson spends all of NSCF 34 perfecting his water delivery form to Dex Banka as he sits with a redshirt, while Larry Cunningham goes off and gets another playoff bye only to lose in the first game yet again. Towards the end of the season, he was actually getting pretty efficient at chucking Banka a bottle without even having to get up, but unfortunately, these throwing skills did not translate to having a football in his hands. It turns out, it's hard to build on what skills are already there when there aren't actually any skills there.

Good news for "The Answer" in NSCF 35, you don't really have to throw the ball or be skilled at all to play quarterback in Ranoria. Why pass the ball and risk interception when you can just have an RB room with three starting-quality guys and one pretty much braindead Dhemixian? We still don't know how Steele Buchanan is alive, and Derek Boss did not help in the slightest.

So, here we are: 5 weeks into NSCF 35. Devon Thompson's Governors are 5-0 (4-0 in the Horizon), with an OT thriller against the Elite Eleven falling their way. Larry Cunningham's Blue Jays are 4-1 with a nailbiting loss to the undefeated Prince Pieter's squad and are staring down the barrel of a date at the Elite Eleven in week six. There's no objective measurement, considering UCP and Richardson won't play this season (both will crash out in the playoffs early), but this is the best we can do.

The problem is, nobody actually wants Devon Thompson to be a better QB than Larry Cunningham.

The Dhemixians, of course, want their guy to win and the quitter to lose, but so do the Ranorians. Having their quarterback be better than an air raid QB is a sign of weakness in their eyes. They haven't run the ball enough in that situation, and I doubt any amount of running will be enough after.

Based on resume alone, Larry Cunningham very clearly takes the cake here, having won one conference championship to Thompson's zero. But then there's the stats. It may shock you to find out that Devon Thompson has a higher completion percentage and TD/INT ratio than Larry Cunningham, but that boils down to a fundamental mindset difference in how they're used. Because Craig Kelly leans on the pass heavily, Cunningham's going to throw more incompletions and interceptions whilst also having more touchdowns and completions than Thompson. Then, because of how Manlio leans on the run heavily, Thompson's going to be more efficient, careful, and effective with his passes than Cunningham is.

The rate stats love The Answer, the counting stats love CunningHIM.

There's no clear winner here between these two because they're incomparable. In essence, they're two different styles of QB doing two polar opposite jobs. It'd inherently be unfair to hold one to the other's standard and vice versa when comparing the two. Say what you will, Devon Thompson is fundamentally an equally talented QB as Larry Cunningham is.

For the sake of The Answer's safety, Larry Cunningham is the clear winner here, but know the truth.

[Elitexis]

ELITEXIS ORIGINS

Location: outside Sadeg, Drawkland
Time: approx. 4 years before NSCF 35

Months had passed. Elias Keys, the original proposer of the idea, spent that time creating detailed plans for several facilities. With his several lifetimes of study, combined with help from the sleepless Ross Hunter, the duo had pretty accurate projections for the cost of the project, depending on what exactly they were going to end up building.

Most importantly, the 'Villa' was already under construction. The individual houses for each of the Elite were planned uniformly, at least in structure. A large area of the Elite's land was leveled for this construction. The previously-unused greenbelt land outside Sadeg that the Elite had slowly obtained over the years now featured a wooded area mostly grown and tended to by Dominic Southers. It was entirely planted, and has since grown into a full grove covering a major portion of their property. This wooded area (that Dominic sometimes the 'Grove') had a chunk cut out for the mini-neighboorhood of homes for the Elite.

Because of the consensus among the team and a smaller cost that they could handle from their savings, the Elite got to work with the Villa immediately. The rest of the area had yet to be confirmed. The Elite Eleven spoke with several of their immortal friends, looking for potential investors. Cam and Nicole were glad to help, but Sarah Arrowsword declined. With each commitment received, the definitive plans for the new recreational area expanded.

Fortunately for the Elite, they received a perfect opportunity to convince another few well-endowed immortals to their cause. Well-endowed financially, that is. Drawkland finally broke its long time away from the multiversal Olympic Games, which incentivized DISC to field a men's soccer team to compete in that category. Though the Elite hadn't played international soccer since IAC-18, it was a no-brainer since men's soccer doesn't exist in any major capacity in Drawkland. The Elite, however, had international soccer experience already, and nothing else to do.

Knowing they'd be at the Games regardless, the Elite decided to compete in the tryouts for the Games in other events, with each of the eleven qualifying in a different discipline in addition to their team effort in soccer. Of course, with some clash between the individual Elite events and the team soccer games, there were spots that would need filled throughout the run. To keep things relatively simple, they recruited the only other immortal athletes they knew in the Accords: Jack Hoy and Leo Cross, longtime players of the OTHER football. For some reason, Iarocav's son Lerocav tagged along, saying he'd played pro sports a few times in his immortal lifespan and could be a decent sub.

The part of that experience which is important to this story starts here. It's the postgame party after the Elite somehow won gold in Men's Football (that is soccer) with a 1-0 win in the final. Spoilers, I know. As the Elite wander around the Athlete's Village in Hamilton, Elias and Ross end up explaining their home expansion project to Jack Hoy and Leo Cross.

"Wait, so you're gonna make like a whole amusement park?" Jack Hoy, clearly slightly intoxicated and still wearing his gold medal around his neck despite the medal ceremony being hours prior. "And what else?"

"Probably a small hotel and convention center type thing," Ross clarified. "A place where groups can host events. We're trying to make it an entire attraction that hits multiple niches. Families, businesses, individuals, tourists, all that stuff."

"And you think this is viable financially?" Leo Cross asked curiously. "Have you done market research and all that stuff?"

"We've polled our fan club, ticket members, and a few in the Sadeg area." Elias said quickly. "We actually got better results than we thought. If it wasn't going to work we wouldn't be comfortable putting that much of our own money into it, much less ask for anybody else's."

"Okay, I am SO down!" Jack exclaimed. "But can there be a Jack ride somewhere in the park? Like a real fast rollercoaster with a bunch of spins and stuff. That would be so badass."

"We could absolutely do something like that!" Elias replied. "We're probably gonna say the area is presented by Elite & Friends so people like you can have attractions too. We'll keep you posted."

"Yeah, and we'll be sure to retread all of this info and ask for a real commitment when you're actually sober," Ross chuckled.

"Fair enough!"

"Have you got your taxes figured out?" Lerocav's voice suddenly rang out from behind the group. Elias in particular jumped, thanks to an unsettling experience he and Lerocav had gone through a couple days prior.

"You sound like your dad," Ross muttered to himself as Lerocav came to join the rest.

"I say this from a place of kindness," Lerocav insisted. "I don't want you to pay more than you have to. It's not like I get any of it!"

"Is that sarcasm?" Jack asked, getting cut off halfway through by Eli.

"We've run the calculations." Elias grinned. "We're gonna be able to write a lot of this off, thanks to being related to business expansion. Probably going to completely counter any taxes we incur for the next few years."

"Mhm, right." Lerocav rubbed his chin, then pointed back at Elias. "So how about property taxes?"

"Our property taxes aren't that bad, really." Ross squinted for a second as he recalled the details. "We're out in the middle of nowhere, at least by old Sadeg standards. The PVA hasn't really bothered us much since we've expanded this land."

"That all changes once you build a goddamn theme park on your land." Lerocav raised a brow. "Building large-scale entertainment out in greenbelt land? Stuff that could one day be neighborhoods and maybe even an outlying suburb if you guys hadn't been hoarding it. You're gonna get absolutely reamed on the re-assessment. Especially in that area around Sadeg. Dad's been pretty particular with how they manage it."

"Oh." Elias felt a knot in his stomach. He completely didn't figure that as part of the equation when calculating future costs. "Well, I'm sure Iarocav wouldn't have a problem with our project. Couldn't we just ask him for an exception?"

"People generally don't like it when politicians bend the rules for their buddies. Especially when they're immortal ones with theoretically absolute power." Lerocav rolled his eyes. "He wouldn't cut the slack for you like that."

"I hate taxes," Jack Hoy added helpfully.

There was a pause in the conversation with that bombshell revealed. For some reason, Jack's comment bounced back and forth in Ross's head a couple times. "I wish there was a way we could dodge all of that. It's the same land we've always owned, it's dumb that we'll get penalized for using it the way we want to. It's not like we're ruining any natural wonder or impeding our non-existent neighbors."

"I mean ..." Lerocav shrugged. "There is one way you could get out of it."

"Really?" Elias turned his head. "How?"

"I can't just tell you that." Lerocav grinned savagely. "You'll have to earn that knowledge. Maybe try brushing up on your early history. Over a couple thousand years, we tend to end up with a lot of old loopholes that are never closed."

"Of course," Ross grumbled. "More homework for me. Thanks a lot."

"I didn't have to say anything!" Lerocav turned, clearly done with the discussion.

---

4 years and about a hundred tax law books later ...

It was an away game. If there was any solace, 'away' meant 'a couple hours of driving and staying in Drawkland'. Playing a road game in Drawk City was almost as close to home as the Elite Eleven could get, unless Sadeg State came back into the fold. What the Elite needed more than any amount of crowd on their side was just another win in the books. After the season started with back-to-back close wins (split 1-1), the next two week were hellish blowouts with the Elite giving up over 40 points apiece.

After a month of locking in, watching an ungodly number of football strategy guides on the internet, and re-thinking the gameplan, Elite Eleven University finally had a somewhat sane playbook in the works. It was tough, being the players and the coaching staff and having to spend time both practicing and figuring out what to practice in the first place. The Elite wouldn't complain, of course, the additional difficulty helped level the playing field.

Maybe it leveled the playing field a little too much in the other direction, but no matter. In this game against Drawk Corps U, the Elite were pulling off something exceptional. They were staying in the game. When the Corps scored, the Elite found a way to respond each time. Unfortunately for the Elite, they'd been trailing the entire game due to being unable to keep the Corps out of the end zone and themselves settling for a field goal in their first drive.

Finally, the Elite defense actually looked elite, holding Dak Waterman Jr.'s squad to a field goal midway through the fourth. That made the score 24-31 in Corps U's favor. Still a deficit with time running out, but the Navy Dragons were finally within one score of tying the game. To everybody's surprise, the Elite actually pulled a competent drive out of the hat with time waning in the fourth. Using the spread offense to loosen the defense, the Elite were content to tear up yardage underneath and use their superhuman tempo to keep the Corps U D on their heels.

That was the main reason the Elite were keeping up in this game. Their tempo was tiring out the Corps U defense, in addition to their speed at the skill positions being enough to easily outmaneuver the normally stout Corps linebackers. In this final drive, it started to really add up. It felt almost incomprehensible, but the Elite drove their way into the red zone by the time the two minute warning came around.

It seems the Elite were prepared for a short clock situation near the end zone. Two plays out of the two-minute timeout, the Elite had the ball goal-to-go. A couple very quickly staged and reset runs from Roger Apollo put the ball inside the five. Finally, Corps U head coach Larry Wright called a timeout. It was clear the Elite weren't going to bumble their way out of the rest of the clock, and Wright needed to give his defense a breather before they played two downs to win the game.

Unfortunately for the home crowd, the Corps D couldn't even pull off one down to keep the Elite at bay. After the actually effective rushing attack that drive, the Corps linebackers were keyed on the run for third down. Jaxon Madison executed a read-option, handing the ball to Apollo again ... only for the running back to stand up straight and lay the ball up for Nicholas Kingston, a jump pass that just got over the hands of the LB and into Kingston's waiting arms.

The Elite had the chance to tie the game, but with only 15 seconds left in the game, they felt that it was time for a shock move. Overtime, as they found against Richardson, probably wouldn't end well. They had a chance to steal this win after trailing the entire game ... so they went for it. It was like watching Cavsar's Gladiators on the field: the Elite Eleven were going for two. The score was 30-31, this was essentially for the game, barring something bizarre.

With the enormous bag of tricks the Elite possessed, the two point conversion play might be the only true advantage they have against other teams. Teams had to be prepared for a million different gadget things. Sometimes the best way to counteract that stuff is to disrupt the delicate timing and spacing by bringing pressure. The Corps decided on that for this attempt, but it turned out to be the wrong choice. Instead of running some circus play to bust somebody wide open, Jaxon Madison calmly received the snap in shotgun and fired the ball at Elias Keys, who was already on his way to the ground, crouching just past the goal line. The throw was perfectly on time, and Eli curled into a ball with the successful two-pointer.

The crowd in Corps University Hub got quiet. The game wasn't over yet, but the chances of their home team pulling off a field goal drive with hardly a dozen seconds on the clock? Not great. The squibbed kickoff from Nicholas Kingston (that day's short straw drawer) burned a couple seconds too, so the Corps had one timeout and maybe two plays to get into range for their kicker Ross Johnson.

The last snap of the game wasn't just a failure for Corps U, it was a bit of an embarrassment. The Elite dropped 8 guys into coverage for Waterman Jr.'s first pass, making it difficult to find a read. Even worse, when Dak finally did find a target, Richard Hanson made an incredible leap past his lineman, batting the ball out of the air. The ball slapped off Hanson's hand and fluttered backwards ... into the waiting hands of Trevor Garnet, who'd disengaged with his blocker and visually tracked the ball before the rest of the linemen knew what had happened. Garnet spun and sprinted the couple dozen yards into the end zone, padding the Elite lead and making it nearly impossible for Corps U to come back.

There was still a second on the clock at that point, forcing the Elite to run a PAT to make the score 39-31. The resulting squib and lateral kick return was quashed, and the Elite Eleven had their second win of their NSCF careers and the first against a 'fellow' Drawkian school. Not bad work, but they'd need to really lock in their next stretch if they still had postseason ambitions to feed.

[Quebec and Shingoryeo]

OOC: This is strictly a Drawkfiction fanfic and does not reflect footballing realities.

D R A W K F I C T I O N

The Greatest Football Game To Be Played
By: GoldenGaYael
It is year 2076. NationStates College Football is about to enter a brand new era that takes place when the two first-time schools, Cavsar-Columbus and Bolgatanga State, head to Iqaluit for what would be the first of many championship games for them. Cavsar-Columbus, on one end, is considered a team of black magic where the nuclear wasteland of Columbus were transfused with the codex of Cavsar, while Bolgatanga State's hail mary bid for the NSCF have turned out in the best way possible when they have, up to this point, 16-0. In the snow-filled, -30'C fields of Iqaluit, where the death stands in the way of those who try to leave the field before the final whistle, who will win this championship game?

---
PART 1: Intro.
---

Flash forward into the future.

Well, maybe not that far into the future. You are only going ahead by two years after all.

You will still be living in the world where you would still recognise most of the college football's biggest names, still root for most of the relevant ones, and really hope that perhaps your school can win a difficult game against the behemoths of the world.

In the yesterworld, those tended to vary. The duopoly days of Banijan and Ranorian duo have mostly been dusted into the memories of the parents' game, as the Chromatik and Vanorian waves would follow, but the college football's world would not see periods of school-based dominance as they used to do so. Instead, they would instead transform into a highly competitive, multipolar scene as the competition became multidirectional and international. Instead of seeing the familiar faces over and over (Cold Hill's remarkable streak of consistency aside), we ended up seeing a remarkable churn of talent that'd otherwise be ignored, with no predictable outcome to be found.

Just three cycles before the date, in fact, was the prime example of this. Cavsar University, previously the lesser-regarded name of two Drawkian schools in the NSCF, would finally show up as the Gladiators, who were then led by one of the greatest wideouts to have graced the NSCF, and at least the best since the likes of Alessandra Mio and Kasozi Batte, managed to pull off a phenomenal upset against a highly inspired, well-coached Cold Hill side. In a cycle where nobody had expected them to break the mould, and right as the DISC were thinking about pulling the plug on the program purely out of discretionary reasons, they would go onto pull off what Drawkians had been waiting for twenty years prior to that - a second NSCF title.

Julian Gallagher, of course, would go onto win the MOP. He would go onto become underdrafted as a wideout, something that nobody in the international media would come to understand, into the mid-first round pick. Pretty surprising for the Grid Corps' sole great white hope on the wideout spot right?

But enough with that already.

The following cycle too would end up a surprise. Not because a Banijan school had taken this long to win one again, but because of how difficult the saga was for Hannah McKendry, Horace Horton and everybody else. McKendry, the daughter of Joongyeong and daughter-in-law to one and only Lance Kabuye, was heading into a period of uncertainties. One where the constant quarterbacking troubles, legal and disciplinary issues of Horny Horton, and of course the mental block of her own players played. Her star, of course, was having issues finding right time to get hot, with his fifth and final campaign set to be only the second season where Horton was healthy and eligible for entirety of it.

The decks were against the Cougars. And yet they won, beating out the Cavsar squad of yesteryear that had the godly talents of Brooklyn Beck-Gallagher. BBG, the ever-hated star quarterback of Sadeg State who was underappreciated by everybody at her dream school, where her parents were the legends and her ex-partner, Jace Phoenix, would transfer into, was one of several studs in the Cavsar team that's lost significant depth but carried key focal points such as her eventual husband (duh), and defensive studs Gilligan Ahn and Steve Gordon. On a year where it appeared so clear that Cavsar could pull off a back-to-back title run (so cursed amirite), Horton's gallantry and determination would end up what it takes to prevent that, and in doing so, setting up a nice chapter of history.

But none of these people were prepared for what's going to come in time, as the most unlikely of collegiate football battles would take just four years after the great showdown pitting Gallagher against Horton. Bolgatanga State, the A&M university that had begun as a satellite campus of Aksum State and Northern Moravica Universities, would find themselves on quick ascendancy in the recent years, as would Cavsar-Columbus, the most unlikely of all NSCF institutions.

Those two, in a bid to outperform the legendary Felswyr State University team that had gone 10-0 in their debut season, are now looking to play for history, and in a year where all rules were broken and no guarantees were followed, it was bound to be the one to watch.

[Drawkland]

Big Eight & Celestia
Week 6

Now at the halfway point for the conference stage, and it's really still anybody's game! Don't blink.

---

BIG EIGHT
National College of Agricultural Studies (HOD) 31–26 Alexandria University (CAD)
National Military & Public Services Academy (HOD) 7–38 LeBois Santura University (CAD)
Richardson University (RAN) 37–0 Kallipolis Academy (TMN)
Cold Hill University (RAN) 37–24 University of Raukieff (TMN)
South Penn (USD) 21–7 North Penn Tech (USD)

   BIG EIGHT                                          Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 LeBois Santura University (CAD)                      5    5   0   150   24 +126
 2 Richardson University (RAN)                          5    5   0   135   39  +96
 3 Cold Hill University (RAN)                           5    4   1   151   80  +71
 4 Alexandria University (CAD)                          5    3   2   121   66  +55
 5 South Penn (USD)                                     5    3   2   158  135  +23
 6 University of Raukieff (TMN)                         6    3   3   130  131   −1
 7 North Penn Tech (USD)                                6    3   3   116  143  −27
 8 National College of Agricultural Studies (HOD)       6    2   4   117  181  −64
 9 Zaldi Zuria Technical University (HOD)               5    1   4   101  189  −88
10 Kallipolis Academy (TMN)                             6    1   5    85  158  −73
11 National Military & Public Services Academy (HOD)    6    0   6   112  230 −118

CELESTIA
Lithrelir University (GEX) 14–30 Université du Saguenay (QUE)
Kobale University (GEX) 26–30 SapphireCorp University (HKS)
University of Aberstadt (KAT) 9–6 Technical University of Holland (BAT)
Aberstadt State University (KAT) 48–26 University of Moravica (BNJ)
University of Loyola-Istria (BNJ) 30–16 Northern Moravica University (BNJ)

   CELESTIA                                           Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 SapphireCorp University (HKS)                        5    5   0   173   99  +74
 2 University of Loyola-Istria (BNJ)                    5    4   1   141   85  +56
 3 University of Aberstadt (KAT)                        5    4   1    79   64  +15
 4 Northern Moravica University (BNJ)                   6    4   2   157  109  +48
 5 Aberstadt State University (KAT)                     5    3   2   155  106  +49
 6 University of Moravica (BNJ)                         6    3   3   145  168  −23
 7 Université du Saguenay (QUE)                         5    3   2    90  108  −18
 8 Université St. Croix (QUE)                           5    2   3   134  108  +26
 9 Technical University of Holland (BAT)                6    2   4    88   94   −6
10 Lithrelir University (GEX)                           6    0   6   102  204 −102
11 Kobale University (GEX)                              6    0   6    99  218 −119

[Quebec and Shingoryeo]

Mineral Conference and Independents! - Week 6

Cutoff.

MINERAL
Université nationale de Saint-Jean-Jacques-sur-Mer (UNC) 39–29 Fusa University (AND)
Uniwersytet Nowa Kalanianska (UNC) 34–49 University of Novaaria (SNE)
Mar Sara Tech (VAL) 23–3 Prince Pieter's College (ROT)
Raynor University (VAL) 17–17 Green City University (TJU) (20–26 OT)
Rinaldi Naval Academy (VAL) 53–13 Trent State University (TJU)

 #                                                           Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 Prince Pieter's College                                     6    5   1   184  106  +78
 2 Rinaldi Naval Academy                                       5    4   1   158   65  +93
 3 University of Columbus-Prairie                              5    4   1   190   88 +102
 4 Mar Sara Tech                                               5    4   1   135   51  +84
 5 University of Novaaria                                      5    3   2   171  148  +23
 6 Raynor University                                           5    2   3   135  128   +7
 7 Trent State University                                      6    2   4   130  246 −116
 8 Université nationale de Saint-Jean-Jacques-sur-Mer          6    2   4   149  209  −60
 9 Uniwersytet Nowa Kalanianska                                6    2   4   139  206  −67
10 Green City University                                       6    2   4   155  180  −25
11 Fusa University                                             5    0   5    72  191 −119

INDEPENDENTS

Elite Eleven University (EXI) 38–41 University of Columbus-Prairie (DHE)

[Drawkland]

DNSN's College ShowCase!
Fueled by sNAX

NSCF's new 'game of the week' pregame broadcast full of predictions, fan interactions, and just a bit of chalk talk! See this post and this post for context.

NSCF 35 Week 7: Richardson @ LeBois Santura

"Big Eight fans, we have NOT forgotten about you! It seems that, besides the Cold Hill vs Richardson game that came early this season in a packed week two, most of the early Beight schedule has been rather, no offense, lackluster. Finally, though, we're getting a marquee matchup in week seven. Talk about the strength of schedule all you want, but right now both Richardson and LeBois Santura are 5-0 in the conference and tied for the top spot. That's a top-ranked matchup at this point in the season, especially between two Big Eight stalwarts who've battled for the conference crown before.

Naturally, both these squads got to those records with their fantastic defenses. Outside of their 20-19 stinker that gave the Elite Eleven their first NSCF win, LeBois Santura's Bronco defense has been lights-out, averaging fewer than 5 points per game through 5 Big Eight games. Senior Drawkian LB Tito Bird, also known as NSCF 33's Big Eight and NSCF Defensive Player of the Year, has been a huge part of that fantastic performance so far. Richardson themselves are only a few points behind that mark, highlighted by two-way LB/RB Vincent Hwang-Dalbel. It's going to be a question on whose defense can properly snuff out the opposition.

Richardson will naturally be depending on rushing success if they're going to win. With the absurd 4-running-back system employed by Brand Manlio and the Governor offense, the Bronco front will be doing their best to force Dhemixian QB Devon Thompson to actually throw the ball himself. Meanwhile, Delbin Kasekende III of BSU (aka "DK3") will cut his teeth against an actually competent defense for the first time this cycle. There's lots of intrigue in this one, even outside of the conference implications!

ShowCase is happy to travel to Cardenao for the first time, especially the picturesque city of LeBois. Hopefully ShowCase will be back for Big Eight action soon enough, but we'll be sure to savor this clash of Governors and Broncos.

- Rod Barringer, ShowCase host

[TJUN-ia]

So yeah...this week was interesting.

The Trent State Feathercaps were nearing the end of this run of games before a bye takes them to the 20th Earth Trophy battle...but they had to go to Odyssey Field to face the Rinaldi Naval Academy Midshipmen first. No one knew what to expect from the newest team in Valanora, but their run-first approach (led by Tuva Håland) smashed their way through TSU's defense in the true Military Academy style. 53-13 felt about right...and now, the Caps must lick their wounds and prepare to welcome the rival to the Horseshoe.

Meanwhile, the Green City Royal Eagles were at Vahalla Falls to face the Raynor Rockets in a game no one expected much from. This was going to be a simple game where the Eagles would just fall to Andy Magnusson's sword...or was it? Ngimphiwe Cele seemingly disagreed with that assessment, and what followed was a duel with these Rockets in enemy territory that went down to the wire. Both Cele and Sidney Jones threw two TDs each, with Wanati Khalihina and Maia Illytebovich getting both PATs and a FG, so this game ended up unexpectedly going to OT. The Eagles got the ball first and scored a FG, to which the Rockets responded with one of their own. The Rockets couldn't get anything from 2OT, so Cele got the ball back looking try and silence Vahalla Falls. Cele woul push forward and in an instant, managed to find an opening for Bongekile Cele to secure the upset - 26-20 in OT. A big big BIG win...and maybe there is still hope for TJUN-ian College Football after all.

---

SCHEDULE (MINERAL Conference + 3 Non-Conference)
Week 1: vs Columbus-Prairie (DHE) L 16-45 (0-1)
Week 2: @UNSJJSM (UNC) W 37-27 (1-1)
Week 3: vs Nowa Kalanianska (UNC) W 23-22 (2-1)
Week 4: @Mar Sara Tech (VAL) L 22-39 (2-2)
Week 5: vs Raynor (VAL) - Homecoming L 19-60 (2-3)
Week 6: @Rinaldi Naval (VAL) L 13-53 (2-4)
Week 7: BYE
Week 8: vs Green City (TJU) - Earth Trophy XX
Week 9: @Prince Pieter's College (ROT)
Week 10: vs Novaaria (SNE)
Week 11: @Fusa College (AMN)
Week 12: Conference Championship Week
---------------------Non-Conference---------------------
Week 13: vs Aberstadt State (KAT/Celestia) - Senior Day
Week 14: OPEN
Week 15: OPEN

SCHEDULE (MINERAL Conference + 3 Non-Conf)
Week 1: vs Fusa College (AMN) W 46-20 (1-0)
Week 2: @Columbus-Prsairie (DHE) L 24-40 (1-1)
Week 3: vs UNSJJSM (UNC) - Homecoming L 22-30 (1-2)
Week 4: @Nowa Kalanianska (UNC) L 31-36 (1-3)
Week 5: vs Mar Sara Tech (VAL) L 6-34 (1-4)
Week 6: @Raynor (VAL) W 26-20 OT (2-4)
Week 7: vs Rinaldi Naval (VAL)
Week 8: vs @Trent State (TJU) - Earth Trophy XX
Week 9: @Elite Eleven (EXI/Ind.)
Week 10: vs Prince Pieter's College (ROT) - Senior Day (provisional)
Week 11: @Novaaria (SNE)
Week 12: Conference Championship Week
---------------------Non-Conference---------------------
Week 13: BYE
Week 14: OPEN
Week 15: OPEN

[The Kytler Peninsulae]

Welcome to Hartley Campus

Located around 2km away from the waterside heart of Cobden and named after the suburb of Hartley where it was built on a site formerly occupied by a brickworks and latterly to house refugees during the Kitaran Civil War, BIU's primary campus is the home of all university administration and a substantial majority of all departments - though the School of Oceanography is unsurprisingly located on the waterfront, the medical school is largely attached to Cobden General Hospital in the western suburb of Shirleyhill, and some arts courses are taught out of a former office complex closer to central Cobden.

Much of the campus consists of a string of mid-rise buildings with either local red bricks or various pastel-shaded render used in the frontage, the Mathematics building standing taller simply because there's a lot of classic teaching rooms and lecturer offices there and not a lot of need for the kind of equipment you can't easily install many storeys up. Conversely, the Engineering department is rather more sprawling because it extremely does have such facilities - notably the wind tunnel complex that is widely used not only by BIU students but the entire Bitternean motorsports community (and the latter extensively recruits from the former anyway).

Green space is spread across multiple pockets rather than one big quadrangle - a deliberate planning choice to make the campus feel like it has grown organically over far more time than it actually has (OOC: and to match my RL alma mater's main campus which has organically grown in that way, albeit partly because of how flat the site isn't). However, there is a relatively large plaza (unofficially referred to as Margaret Square) on the northern side of the campus that incorporates a bus station at one end - the hub for university-run buses linking campus with central Cobden and the various halls of residence that almost all first-year students live in - and the 1,093-seat Margaret Grassam Theatre at the other, with a third side demarcated by the very strange bowl-like curved frontage of the Lanchester Library building. This provides a quasi-quadrangle that provides plentiful room for students or theatre crowds to circulate to where they need to go, in a way that a grassy area simply can't in wet conditions without causing a whole lotta mess - and the presence of a balcony above the theatre entrance has served to add "informal concert venue" to the list of roles this site fills.

Pictured in Margaret Square, outside the Lanchester Library building.
OOCly made in Automation with no assistance from climate-killing plagiarism machines.

There is one special bus that operates from here at night.

Run by the imaginatively-named student union BIUnion, the also-imaginatively-named Safety Bus - actually more car than bus, an eight-seat van-based MPV - serves two purposes. The first - the one it was made for - is to drive students directly from campus to home, typically running every hour from 9pm to 1am with some variations depending on the specifics of late-night campus events.

The second is a new product of the BIU gridiron team. If a BIU player scores a safety on Saturday, the following Monday they get paraded around Cobden in the Safety Bus.

This was a concept suggested before this season by a Safety Bus driver as a joke.

Then Kuma Kanj sacked Jaxtyn Mynatt in the end zone to start The Longest Minute, beginning an unthinkable streak of 23 points in 60 seconds and 37 unanswered points in total as the Herons stunned the preseason #1 Cavsar University Gladiators, and the joke was now very, very real.

Kanj got his ride around Cobden, thousands of random Cobden locals and visitors (and not just BIU students) showing up to give him a wave as he did, and this whole thing had a life of its own.

Three weeks - and three wins! One of them in Drawkland! - later, the new tradition returned again. The Herons got two safeties in their sicko-mode 10-0 road win against the Kormania University Krashing Boars, and while one of them didn't exactly have a visiting player to credit for it - a bobbled snap by the home QB that he put down in the end zone for two before any Herons could do so for six - the other did, by way of also coming from an endzone sack. Lit Dings, welcome aboard the Safety Bus!

Five days later, the 4-0 Herons - something that still makes about as much sense as third-year calculus classes in the aforementioned Mathematics building do to the average Literary Studies student (who would surely argue the feeling would be mutual if they showed the maths types their lecture notes on "Aesthetics and the Philosophy of Art," for that matter) - saw their opening drive against the rebel band geeks of the Clermont University Blue Wave stall out with a failed attempt to punch the ball in from a yard out on fourth-and-goal, the stop made by euphonium-playing sociology student Charles Johnson. But after the initial disappointment subsided, fans realised what might happen next, and started chanting "GET OUT THE BUS!"

QB Connor Wilson - one of only four experienced gridiron players on the entire roster, the others having walked out of the team during training camp never to return - handed the ball off to Carter Blalock, whose preseason qualifications for this team amounted to being the marching band's top flagball player. Slowed up initially by Kanj, he was just about to get out of his own endzone when another defender - ironically enough one of the team's music students, albeit one who focuses on piano and composition - burst onto the scene and smashed him to the ground.

Waldemar Gorecki, welcome aboard the Safety Bus!

The Herons would score three touchdowns - one rushed in by QB Thomas Dillehay late in the first quarter, one rushed in by SB Gary Maher late in the second, and one stemming from a play-action wheel pass from the former to the latter midway through the third - with Clermont's scoring confined to a single second-quarter field goal that was answered in kind by the Herons on their own next drive. 26-3 to the 5-0 Herons, winless St. Ivor Notre Dame up next before the Chromatik gauntlet, expectations being completely revisited every week - but for some of the citizens of Cobden, the most exciting element was the prospect of seeing the newly-famous vehicle darting around town on a Monday afternoon.

If a rite of passage for any decent college team is having a weird campus tradition, these Herons have ticked that box in their collective redshirt freshman year too. You could joke about this team being revved up, but with the Safety Bus being an electric vehicle that doesn't really fit.

Then again, nor does a 5-0 BIU.

[Chromatika]

Halfway Point

Five games in, halfway through the Conference slate. Only ZIoT has faced a Drawkian school (and six games). Nobody has faced the upstarts in Bitternea University. The ComCat/CatCom Game awaits - and if the Hellcats lose that, they'll have three losses. Still, five games is enough of a sample size to conclude couple things about each team so far. Let's make three points about each team so far - one positive, one negative, and one predictive.

Mountain District Positive: The Vanorian Talon is Real
Coming into the season, with so many Freshmen starting on defense, it was obvious that the Firehawks would have to be carried by their offense. Add in the fact that Nicolas Berg is more of a precision passer, and everything was going to depend on the Sophomore Quarterback and his Wide Receivers - namely the duo of Nora Fauske and Pia Solem, now known as the Vanorian Talon. Berg had a rough beginning to the season, but has really hit his stride in the two rivalry games, throwing three more touchdown passes against the Hellcats. Neither Fauske nor Solem are very tall - both are under six feet - but they make up for that with great hands, speed, and physicality that is unexpected from someone their stature. They do their best work in tandem with either Heidi Sundstrom or Colt Atreus, but there is no denying the impact that the two of them have had on Berg's emergence as a above 75% passer of the ball. No matter how much they try, Muhoozi Kadindo and Andrew Kun Wa Lee won't ever be star backs in the Firehawks' offense; no, they will live and die by the mobility and accuracy of Berg and the way that he fits the ball into tight coverage to find Fauske and Solem. Barely above twenty-eight points a game isn't a lot, but it's enough to be undefeated so far.

Mountain District Negative: Though Talented, the Defense is Very Green
Andreas Bøthun. Olander Wilk. Håkon Alvestad. Ikena Pona. Four starters on the defensive side of the ball are Freshmen. They are very talented - the flashes can be seen by how Andreas can burst through the middle, how Wilk recognizes plays, how Alvestad breaks on the ball, and how Pona makes up for mistakes with his amazing speed. However, they are making a slew of mistakes that should honestly be expected from youth making their first starts, and that has led to the points that the Firehawks have given up. About thirteen points a game given up isn't bad, but when over half of the mistakes are being made by these four players, it's easy to see that they are still a work in progress. Still, there's been enough good things shown on film to think that they'll grow into their own; it's a matter of development, of not making the same mistake twice, and of continuing to become the player that they want to become.

Mountain District Predictive: Alrick Heidelberg is the Team's Spirit Animal
Not enough words exist to describe the impact that the Ranorian Defensive End is having on the Firehawks. With a relentless motor and solid leadership on the field, Heidelberg's shown that he can dominate games, especially in the Fourth Quarter when the Firehawks have a lead. He's only a Sophomore and getting better week after week, but the way that Isidora Noles isn't afraid to use him on either side of the field - Isabelle Creer is versatile, too - means that he can just wear down the offensive line. The Firehawks can also put in Keena Vrockster when they want to just speed by people. With the Freshmen continuing to grow, a threat like Heidelberg existing on one side of the line will make it much easier for the defense to operate. He'll need to come big for them to get through Bitternea, Cavsar, and Drawk Corps.

Z'ai'ai Positive: Anders Coin is a True #1 Receiver
When Saralynn Pomme graduated, there was worry that the Hellcats wouldn't have a receiver that they can deem a true #1. None of the established receivers were tall, and they didn't have the breakaway speed to run the go routes that the team needs to operate their deep passing attack. Anders Coin has truly emerged to be that deep threat. He has deceptively fast acceleration, meaning that he makes up for a slower first step by just blowing by people midway through the route. The struggles the Hellcats have had on the offensive side of the ball aren't due to the lack of a true deep threat. The Hellcats have started to incorporate Coin's presence to open up Aki Kaoru and Mahamadou Bah underneath, and that creativity may be what they need to turn their fortunes around.

Z'ai'ai Negative: The Secondary
So far this season, neither Lambert Coquelin nor Malgorzata Pomorska have shown that they are true starting-level cornerbacks. Coquelin was supposed to be an island corner with long range, good jumping reach, and sure hands, but his gambles to go for the interception have led to more touchdowns given up than interceptions themselves. He's actively trying to time his approaches better, and the Hellcats don't want him to lose his killer instinct, but he may just have to be more selective about when he decides to take his chances. As for Pomorska, receivers are going directly at her instead of trying to get by her; this takes her speed out of the game and makes it so she has to play physically instead. This isn't her strong suit, and it's showing. Ruwon Ittiti has often times tried to help from his Strong Safety side, but opposing teams are even exploiting that by throwing at the space that he is giving up. This is a problem to solve - and they can't be stopped by just Free Safety Isaiah Mneyan, who has been the lone bright spot.

Z'ai'ai Predictive: It's All on Holliday
When your calling card is the deep ball, it's all on the Quarterback and how he places the ball in just the right spot for the receiver. The protection has been good if not great; the receiving talent is good, and the plays are there. Holliday has often times thrown the ball just slightly off target that has given the defenders the opportunity to make up ground and make a play on it. He and Eric Dalton are supposedly working on different route combinations and throwing angles, but this is something that they really have to overcome - otherwise, this team will have a hard time finishing above .500 in Conference play. The upcoming CatCom Game is massive for the squad as they lost the Mountain District Mayhem, Holliday once again throwing two interceptions on deep balls that were just 5% lacking.

Chromia Central College Positive: Jakob Steelgarten Has Proven Himself
Stepping into the season, there were some Comets fans who thought that Steelgarten's play, often times considered stable instead of flashy, would not be enough to win in the NSCF. Everyone knew the secondary would be elite, and there wasn't much concern about the line play - but there were some who claimed that starting Kirsi-Marja Sibelius, a far more electric prospect, would be better for the squad. In reply, Steelgarten has been stellar - he hasn't committed a single turnover, he's sharing a brain cell with Offensive Coordinator Desmond Veran as the two continue to take apart defenses, and he's shown considerable toughness in adding the Quarterback run as a viable option. Vatan Vural and Katriina Partanen have both been highly instrumental in the Comets' attack, and Jordan Kimmsler's proven that he can be a true #1 target, but it's the play of Steelgarten and his partnership with Veran that makes the Comets a truly formidable force on the offensive side of the ball. With their defense doing well, it's the two of them that will determine the Comets' ceiling in their inaugural season.

Chromia Central College Negative: The Right Side of the Defense Stands Out
As a whole, the Comets' defense unit is ridiculous. Sveinung Stang and Solomon Seyewanek on the line. Braldey Furman and Aaron Thorne in the linebacking unit. All four starters in the secondary are Seniors. What opposing offenses can notice very quickly, though, is the inexperience on the right side of the defense up to the secondary level. Reid Byrd and Andreas Backer are not the level of players as the aforementioned Stang and Seyewanek, and Francine DeBoer is still figuring things out at the Outside Linebacker position. This means that in a defense with not many holes, there is one in that zone of play. The Comets have tried to make up for this by having Stang move around and having Rana Foss as a more dynamic playmaker to play instead of DeBoer at times, but that area of the defense was instrumental in the Comets' only loss of the season so far against Mountain District, meaning other teams who have elite Quarterbacks could supposedly do the same.

Chromia Central College Predictive: Another Offensive Talent Needs to Emerge
Vatan Vural, Jordan Kimmsler, and Yevokiya Trokhymivna Doroshenko have been the three players to help Steelgarten the most this season. When Kimmsler's deep balls aren't working and Doroshenko is being doubled, though, Steelgarten needs the play of Freshman Receiver Nera Pinston or Junior Cade Shield to improve, or he needs Katriina Partanen to be more willing to take passes out of the backfield on two-back sets. Steelgarten definitely has the smarts and the flow of the game to be the player that the team needs to succeed, but he needs some more players to step up.

MDU's Remaining Opponents' Record: 15-12 (6 losses by Apalatci, back-to-back-to-back games at Bitternea, versus Cavsar, at Drawk Corps in Weeks 8-10)
Z'ai'ai's Remaining Opponents' Record: 16-5 (already played Apalatci)
CCCU's Remaining Opponents' Record: 18-9 (back-to-back-to-back games versus Bitternea, at Cavsar, versus Drawk Corps in Weeks 9-11)

Everything is technically still ahead for all three schools, though Mountain District does have the easiest schedule remaining. With Bitternea and Cavsar still on the schedule for all three schools, sights will finally turn to outside Chromatika - but first, there is the trivial matter of the ComCat/CatCom Game. With both schools having lost to Mountain District, which one will bear the moniker of going 0-2 in-country?