World Bowl L - Everything Thread

[Kamijiro]

Huh. Well, That's Not Something You See Every Day.

Jirō Island's finest village idiots managed to score a lot of points. In a game where running the ball from one end of the field to the other results in six points, it should seem like a foregone conclusion that a lot of points would be scored, right? Oh, bless your heart.

The past five traffic cone derbies have COMBINED have had fewer points than the points output of the Jirō Islanders over the past two matches. After putting up 34 points on a Nova Calonia team that, on any other day, would've mopped the floor with these guys. Although, playing at home helped a ton. An uneven field with a literal tree near the 20 yard line was PRIME home field advantage for a team that has to find any open field to play a game under most circumstances. 34 points is a pretty high score, but following it up with a 45 point explosion is unheard of. Combining those two matches, you get 79 points. Here are the scores for each of the past five traffic cone derbies...

NORTH 6 - South 2
NORTH 11 - South 7
North 0 - SOUTH 2
NORTH 9 - South 7
North 12 - SOUTH 14

For those that don't want to add that up, it's 70 total points. The south are the current traffic cone holders after a 'shootout' 14-12 win after the northerners screwed up a two-point conversion kick to lose the game at the end of regulation. So yeah. These idiots have discovered how to score the ball at a high rate, despite their offense being the equivalent of a horse and buggy on a modern highway. Still, winning games at an international level takes some talent, and it would be a lie to say the team is untalented. It just so happens their talents mostly include day drinking, wire fraud and more day drinking. Oh, and running the damn ball.

[TJUN-ia]

After starting off strong, the Jaguars of TJUN-ia were 1-0 in the Golden World Bowl and you can't say no to that at all. Getting that win on the board was always in the best interest of this team and the sport as a whole, but this journey had only just begun. Everyone knew that things were only getting started across the board and Gus McKerrin knew that tougher and tougher tests were still to come...but if only he knew the chaos that was bout to come, and not in way that word usually means.

Let's start with the big one - the #4 Sarzonia Stars at the Field of Dreams in The Gardens of New Washington. Whenever the highest seed in the group comes to TJUN-ian soil in any sport, the atmosphere hits different in several ways...but considering this nation took us out of the World Cup on top of the history between us, this matchup was always going to be hot! Both teams knew that getting one over the other this early into this group stage could be a momentum-builder of epic proportions. And so, in this contest, two similar teams would aim to frustrate the other in as many ways as possible. The first half was all-defence as both Mohammad Al-Khalifa and Walter Knapp seemed to play a game of chess for the first half an hour of the contest. Anytime one team wanted to start something, the other gave little in the way of opportunities - which led to a lot of punts between both teams. The only times something else happened was after two of our longest drives, with Xander Tiovannen making 2/2 on FGs to enter the half as a crazy 6-0. The second half would see one more bit of action, a Punt Return TD for Immaculate Nakisuuyi with the PAT to boot, and no matter what the Stars threw at us, our defence locked that shit down. In any other world, scoring 13 points shouldn't win you a football game. But we just did. Against the world #4 at that. In a shutout!

After that incredible result came our first road game of the season over against a team well known for taking out TJUN-ian teams. East Lithuania had already beaten the Hoops-Jags in the IBC, so we knew these guys were certainly serious...but then kick-off arrived. The moment that ball was kicked into the night, this stopped being a contest. Leon Gallas managed 5 TDs in his time out there, finding Lucky Sithole-Sita thrice and once each for Fremont Whitehorse and Gilbert Nyamutsamba - with Tiovannen going 4/5 on PATs and hitting a FG. The backups did the rest: Moses Igbinoghene finding Yurilka Zelinskaya, Victory Prince-Brown and Ivan Borosić for three more TDs as Glory Oparanozie went 2/3 on PATs and also made a FG. 60-0. 73-0 over these two games. Quite remarkable. Unexplainable, almost.

How do you even top that? No seriously, how are we supposed to top whatever the fuck we just did? Simple - the road game up next. After Quirhoshe comes to the NAU, we must go to Mar Sara to face #11 Valanora - one of the old gods of sport themselves. If Valanora plays it, they are probably good at it. To beat Valanora on their turf is to take down a Titan...but that is what we must try to do. GO JAGS!

---

SCHEDULE (Group Gavin Davis)
MD1: vs Natkr (41) - Field of Dreams in The Gardens, New Washington W 38-13 (2nd/1-0)
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MD2: vs Sarzonia (4) - Field of Dreams in The Gardens, New Washington W 13-0 (1st/2-0)
MD3: @East Lithuania (UR) W 60-0 (1st/3-0)
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MD4: vs Quirhoshe (UR) - Field of Dreams in The Gardens, New Washington
MD5: @Valanora (11) - Lathalein Celestial Stadium, Mar Sara
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MD6: vs Rouyoute (45) - Field of Dreams in The Gardens, New Washington
MD7: @Delaclava (20)
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MD8: vs Delaclava (20) - Field of Dreams in The Gardens, New Washington
MD9: @Rouyoute (45) - The Crooked Crown Cap, Rouyoute
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MD10: vs Valanora (11) - Field of Dreams in The Gardens, New Washington
MD11: @Quirhoshe (UR)
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MD12: vs East Lithuania (UR) - Field of Dreams in The Gardens, New Washington
MD13: @Sarzonia (4) - Joe Gibbs Stadium, Woodstock
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MD14: @Natkr (41)

[Banija]

OOC note to grader: The top half of this RP was largely written last cycle, with minimal edits.

Short Preview- Upcoming GFLB Season

Introduction- Format and Scheduling

What the GFLB right now is looking for, is stability. And they seemingly have found it- settling in on a format introduced around World Bowl 46. Six 4 team divisions, with no conferences. You'll play each team in your division twice(6 games), and a single round robin 2 other divisions(8 games), and then 1 game each against the same place team in a division that you haven't already played against(3 games), for a total of 17 games.

An odd number of games? Yes. As always for this league, the byes will be at the same time for everyone. There will be a bye week after Week 9(traditionally rivalry weekend on the domestic college scene), and, with a 17 schedule, the second bye remains. There will be another Bye after week 15(aka national championship weekend for domestic college gridiron). So the regular season will take 19 weeks to complete 17 games. Ergo, each team only plays one preseason game.

Teams, of course, schedule their own pre-season games in this league. The GFLB has de-regulated preseason games- people schedule however they want, against domestic or foreign teams. Ever popular joint practices are expected to become more of the norm, and teams will be allowed and encouraged to play pre-season games against teams from other leagues.

What about the playoff format? That is easy. The six division winners, and the next six best teams by record in the league, will all qualify for the playoffs. Top 4 division winners will be seeded 1-4 and get a first round bye. The next 8 playoff qualifiers will be seeded by record. Which, yes, means that the bottom 2 division winners can be seeded behind the wild cards. They are seeded 5-12. A fixed single elimination bracket commences, and the stronger seed is always playing at home.

The GFLB Title Game name is called "The Simba Bowl", and the championship game shall always be held at the Stadium of the Restoration(cap. 101,835) in Busukuma, National Capitol Region. Below, we have our divisions.

There has been a lot of team stability- same amount of teams, no division realignment, no relocations.

The league contains 21 teams in Banija, and three foreign teams- the Dukuma Dragons(from the Busoga Islands), the Mar Sara Night Elves(from Valanora), and the St. Jakob Honey Badgers (from Siovanija & Teusland).

North Division
Mynda Gorillas. Mynda, Aksum.
Askatasuna Wildcats. Askatasuna, Aksum.
Aissa Crocodiles. Aissa, Hangaza.
Jinja City Springboks. Jinja City, Hangaza.

Moravica Division
Kosactus Red Vultures. Kosactus, Moravica.
Herzegovina City Cobras. Herzegovina City, Moravica
Rukunbi Wizards. Istria, Moravica.
Istria Black Mambas. Istria, Moravica

West Division
Dukuma Dragons. Dukuma, North Island, Busoga Islands
Mar Sara Night Elves. Mar Sara, Valanora.
Busembe Timberwolves. Busembe, Kitara
Sisonke Leopards. Sisonke, Kitara.

South Division
Mukeruzi Hyenas. Mukeruzi, Ankole.
Hoima Zebra. Hoima, Ankole Region.
Busukuma Athletic Club. Busukuma, National Capitol Region.
Busukuma Suns. Busukuma, National Capitol Region, Banija.

Central Division
Isipongo Wild Boars. Isipongo, Buganda.
Lwanga Rhinos. Lwanga, Buganda.
Umbazi Metropolitan Sporting Club. Umbazi, Buganda
Igulu Bush Elephants. Igulu, Hangaza.

East Division
Duntho Oilers. Duntho, Hangaza.
Bunyoro Regional Sporting Club. Dodomo, Bunyoro.
Bwubanza Ostriches. Bwubanza, Bunyoro.
St. Jakob Honey Badgers. St. Jakob, Teusland.

For scheduling purposes, the South, Central, and East divisions are paired together, while the North, Moravica, and West divisions are paired together this season.

While the GFLB generally used geography as a guiding principle for division formation, they ultimately prioritized rivalry retainment over geographic balance. This means that-

- The Aissa Crocodiles, who geographically would be in the East Division, were placed in the North division alongside historic in-state rivals, the Jinja City Springboks
- The Kosactus Red Vultures, who nominally would go into the North Division, were placed into an all-Moravica division with the other Moravica teams
- While there was a strong argument to split the Cobras and Black Mambas, ultimately, the decision was made to develop Moravica rivalries by allowing them to all be in the same division.
- While it would make far more sense for St. Jakob to join the South Division, in order to preserve and develop historical rivalries between Ankole and Busukuma squads, St. Jakob was moved to the East Division.
- While Duntho, upon their move back to Banija from Northwest Kalactin, are arguably the league's northern-most team, they remained in the East Division instead of causing more alignment by being moved to the North Division.

However, that does not mean there will be no realignment in the future.

- With the formation of the Oilers, there are now four teams in Hangaza- enough for its own division. This offseason there were serious discussions about putting the four Hangaza teams in a singular division, and the Commissioner almost passed a plan to do so. However, the owners deadlocked on a realignment plan, and therefore, will continue forward with the current divisional alignment for at least one more season. With questions on expansion coming up, and the Mar Sara Night Elves long-term future in Valanora, many owners felt as if re-aligning right now would only sew confusion and chaos.

Last season, the GFLB ran an international series. This year, with league focus on the Stadium of the Restoration's expansion, as well as acting as a co-host for the World Bowl, the league office did not start a discussion about the international series- therefore, all league games this season will be played home and away. However, the International Series is 'a priority' for the league, and it will surely return.

All-Banija Sports Magazine Division Predictions
(D) = Division champ
(X) = Wild Card

North Division
1. Mynda Gorillas(D)
2. Aissa Crocodiles
3. Jinja City Springboks
4. Askatasuna Wildcats

Last year, this might have been, top to bottom, the worst division in the league. And unfortunately, they might repeat in this spot- unless Raynor U star QB Odin Sørbø enters the draft. It's a weak QB class, with Wade Hurley potentially the biggest name coming out this year, but Odin Sørbø would clear the entire class as the #1 overall pick by quite a bit. The Springboks and the Wildcats were two of the worst teams in the league last season- they both went 3-14, just getting bowled over by everybody they played. There's not much to talk about for them- so let's look at the teams with some real, legit talent.

First, we'll talk about the Mynda Gorillas. The only team to finish with a winning record last season in this division, they not only went 11-6 and earned themselves a home playoff game, they got a first round bye as well- and that was with a rookie QB. They are not really built around the passing game, but Dukku Banyuse's development is going to be interesting to watch. But look at the team they've built. Alejandro Garrina is now a World Bowl champion, and the Cardenao national is the team's starting HB. Osman Pyatt is a young TE, and they've got a couple of World Bowl starters on their offensive line. It's hard to win in this league without a superstar QB, but the Gorillas are perhaps the best team to do so- stud HB, a couple of stud OL, and an elite secondary, with Ole Bakker there. They've also got a supremely pissed off WR1, in Kori Jabayo- who just lost his spot on the NT to Samo Sarr. The right call? Yes. But if you don't think that's extra motivation... You don't know what you're talking about.

Behind them, there's the Aissa Crocodiles. They were 8-9 last season, but they are going to be in even worse place this year. Their best offensive weapon, Kawsu Gaye, is retiring, and they probably don't have the production to make up for it. That said, it wasn't THAT long ago when they won a title with Ice Chineze at the helm- so they've still got a few dudes who have Simba Bowl rings to their name on the roster. WE know they went 8-9 last year, and got worse- but championship pedigree is championship pedigree. That said, if this season goes haywire, expect them to clean house- this is a HC that is firmly on the hot seat.

Moravica Division
1. Istria Black Mambas(D)
2. Herzegovina City Cobras(X)
3. Rukunbi Wizards(X)
4. Kosactus Red Vultures

Last season proved that this is the most interesting division in the league. You've got three teams with talented QBs hitting the absolute primes of their careers- and they are wasting no time trying to win with their QBs. It's an arm race- nerve wracking for the teams and fans involved, but truly, how the sport should be. And I mean, look- we're not even picking the defending Simba Bowl champions, Herzegovina City, to win their only division!

The Istria Black Mambas, of course, have the Banijan NT starter- Kadesh Odika, of FSU/MDU fame. This offense is built to just destroy anyone in their path, and they really do. Honestly, it's a miracle they only finished third in scoring last season. Let's take a look at exactly how stacked this roster is, shall we? First, we got Russell Farmer- yes, THE Russell Farmer, as the starting TE. Then, we got Joshua Okombo, a former NSCF Offensive Player of the Year, as the starting HB. And finally, we've got Godwin Tamuka as the WR1. "Look- I'm spoiled for choice." Odika told reporters. "Obviously, last year Baka Webo was simply on one- but this season, we're going to set all sorts of offensive records. A series of Istria driven ass kickings are coming your way, and while Herzegovina City may be the champs right now, our archrivals winning the Simba Bowl has only increased our motivation." Big words from the QB1.

Then, of course, we've got the Herzegovina City Cobras- the defending champions. Baka Webo had a MVP season, and he was otherworldly. They averaged nearly 39 points a game last season, en route to a league leading 14-3 record. And then, of course, dominant in the playoffs as well- their QB the best of the season. Of course, he still can't seem to unseat Odika for the Serpent Eagles- nobody will. Herzegovina City fans will argue that their man should be the starting QB, but that's neither here nor there. "Look- we've got the tools to build a dynasty." Webo told reporters. "Herzegovina City is the city of champions, and we're gonna keep on win. His weapons aren't quite as good as Odika's- but this is a team built for success.

And then, of course- Rukunbi. The borough of Rukunbi is just a subsection of Istria- but with nearly 1.5 million, would be the 7th largest city in Banija if it were its own city. It has its own sports teams in all of Banija's sporting leagues- and these teams are all ass. The Wizards, though- they aren't waving the red flag. They are in a division with arguably Banija's two most popular teams, and they are looking to spoil the party- again. Felix Ström is the gunslinging QB, and Lana Rhodes is the stud HB- so they've got a team that's built to succeed. In a brutal division, they went 11-6 last season. Behind the two big teams, but of course, comfortably a playoff team, and can make some noise. Can they spoil the party? "There's nothing Rukunbi fans love more than hating Istria." Said a reporter. "Also Herzegovina City, as well. If Rukunbi ever beat Istria in a playoff game? The city would go to flames."

Last, but not least, the Kosactus Red Vultures. So sorry that THIS is your division.

(Other divisions coming next cutoff!)

[Drawkland]

In honor of the 50th edition, I'm doing a "brief" history of the World Bowl. We'll be going era-by-era, and once this series concludes I'll be adding this information to the (currently bare bones) NSS Wiki article for the World Bowl. Enjoy, and if you have any input or feedback, let me know.

After Dancougar's dynasty faded away, nobody really took their place in the power vacuum. The triumvirate of Sarzonia, Delaclava, and Bluth Corporation managed to get close, but none of them had that final breakthrough to turn them into the undisputed top dogs.
3 titles - Dancougar
2 titles - Sarzonia, Delaclava
1 title - Rennidan, Qazox, Arroza, Fujisawan Territories, Cassadaigua, Tocrowkia, Bluth Corporation, F1 Insanity

The Regulars Part 1, Plus More Two Timers
If you were paying close attention to the last few tournaments, then you might've noticed the name Allamunnic States. The nation was originally referred to as The Fanboyists, with the team nicknamed the Volunteers. Starting in World Bowl XIII they became known as "The Regulars," notable for the fact that their national team had a static roster, whose players did not play for any actual domestic teams. This slight shift in identity turned out to be a good one, as the Allamunnic States reached the semifinals twice in the next three cycles and even captured third place in World Bowl XIV.

World Bowl XVI, hosted by Cassadaigua, was the true coming out party for the Regulars. Among the 56 nations in 7-team double round robin groups, only 4 teams captured double digit wins, all of them being 11-1 group winners. Allamunnic States was one of them, alongside Sarzonia, Carasatoga, and Qazox. Allamunnic States in particular boasted the best defense in the tournament by far - averaging less than 10 points allowed per game. With only one other team even reaching 9 wins (Civil Citizenry), the top four teams were heavily favored going into the 24-team playoffs. Of those four, only one of them really had a comfortable ride in the Round of 16, that being Sarzonia obliterating F1 Insanity 45-7. Allamunnic States scraped by the Kytler Peninsulae 13-10, while only two upsets occurred (German Zerabithea over Civil Citizenry and Osarius over Sibirsky). The quarterfinals were much more intriguing: all four contests finished with one-score margins. Sarzonia and Carasatoga fell to Weyr Sular and German Zerabithea, while Allamunnic State beat Osarius and Qazox took care of Rennidan. That left a rather interesting semifinals, with the only really traditional nation left being Qazox. German Zerabithea's magic run continued as they handily beat Qazox 20-30, and Allamunnic States had to depend on an overtime field goal by female kicker Phillipa Demirici to survive against Weyr Sular. This set up a championship game between two teams that hadn't been there before for the first time since WB X. As the title suggests, the Regulars pulled this one out, overcoming a 17-0 first half deficit to eventually win 31-20. Allamunnic States had their first championship after ten cycles of waiting.

Michael VII appropriately hosted World Bowl XVII, where 60 nations hoped to have a magic run to the final like German Zerabithea or Allamunnic States. With the typical 6-team groups for a 10 game group stage, a lot of new faces were starting to pop up at the top. Nobody went undefeated, but the 9-1 teams included the Allamunnic States, Civil Citizenry, Cosumar, German Zerabithea, and the Kytler Peninsulae. There were still some older figures like Bluth Corporation, Carasatoga, and Qazox making the playoffs, but even beyond the Regulars taking hold of the World Bowl meta, there seemed to be some real turnover happening among the tournament's core teams. After an uneventful Round of 20, the Round of 16 saw Allamunnic States getting the biggest blowout of the playoffs, a 40-0 whipping of Chrinthanium. There were a couple upsets in that round, most notably Bluth Corporation beating out Carasatoga 16-10. That was more of a seeding upset than a true team upset, since this was a battle between #4 and #5 in the preseason ranks. The quarterfinal featured more seeding upsets, with only Allamunnic States surviving among the top seeded teams. Space and Bluth Corporation came up with one score victories, while Weyr Sular embarrassed German Zerabithea with a 24-0 skunking. Allamunnic States were still the far-and-ahead favorites, even after scraping by Space with a mere 9-7 semifinal victory. This led to a championship matchup against Bluth Corporation, where the victor would claim their second World Bowl title. However, nobody was surprised when the Regulars came out on top 22-14. In just two final appearances, Allamunnic States had put themselves into the two-title club. Believe it or not, this was also the first time any nation won back-to-back World Bowl titles.

Could the Regulars really manage the first-ever World Bowl threepeat? They'd have to outplay 60 other nations again in World Bowl XVIII, hosted by Civil Citizenry with the exact same format as the previous cycle. There were many more solid teams this time around, including 10-0 Yesopalitha having their best cycle in team history. The Allamunnic States were joined by seven other nations going 9-1, the likes of Andossa Se Mitrin Vega, Civil Citizenry, Cosumar, Darmen, German Zerabithea, Qazox, and West Guinea. A few of these teams were even in the same group with 1-1 head to head splits. The results were pretty clear, with only two of those teams getting upset in the Round of 16 following their byes (Space beating German Zerabithea 26-20, and Chrinthanium taking advantage of an imploding Cosumar 28-0). All the top seeds took care of business in the quarterfinals with multi-score wins, except undefeated Yesopalitha whose normally stout defense fell apart at the worst time, losing 13-33 against hosts Civil Citizenry. With momentum and home field advantage on their side, Civil Citizenry beat Darmen in a tight defensive semifinal to make the final. Allamunnic States and Qazox, who'd developed a notable rivalry by this point, battled in the other semifinal. The Regulars put pedal to metal, winning 24-13 and booking themselves a third straight championship game appearance. Remarkably, this was also a first for the World Bowl. Allamunnic States had the chance to join Dancougar with three titles, and write themselves as the first nation to threepeat in World Bowl history. Instead, they ran out of gas against the hosts. Civil Citizenry trounced the regulars 20-6 to take their own first title. Still, it was hard to deny that the Regulars were now The Team To Beat in the World Bowl.

Michael VII returned as host for World Bowl XIX, yet another 60-nation affair with 10 groups of 6 in double round robin, but with a twist. Instead of going into a Round of 20, the top two qualifiers from each group went on to play in a second group stage, featuring 4 groups of 5 teams in single round robin. From there, the top two teams from each group would go on to the quarterfinals. This tournament was also quite top-heavy, with both Osarius and German Zerabithea going 10-0 in the first group stage. Allamunnic States nearly went undefeated as well, losing to 5-5 Shadowbourne on the final matchday to land at 9-1 alongside Darmen, Yesopalitha, Meshkete, Western Cuba, Vettrera, and Cassadaigua. 8-2 Qazox and Civil Citizenry also topped their groups. Surprisingly, most of the nations that won their groups in the 10-game first group stage actually fell behind in the 4-game second group stage. Among the 8 nations to qualify for the quarterfinals out of the second group stage, only half of them were group winners in the first stage. Though it's difficult to call these late playoff matchups "upsets," two lower seeds won in the first round of actual playoffs. Equestrian States beat Vettrera in their first great World Bowl run, and Yesopalitha outlasted Karditan in the ultimate defensive game: a match ending 3-0. Meanwhile, Allamunnic States and Qazox took care of business to meet in the semifinals once again, adding yet another chapter to their rivalry. For the second cycle in a row, Allamunnic States won by multiple scores, downing Qazox 17-6 to book their historic fourth consecutive final appearance. The nation standing in the way of their Dancougar-tying third title was Yesopalitha, whose defense suffocated Equestrian States to the tune of 24-6. The Flames of Yesopalitha unfortunately stood no chance against the Regulars, getting shut out in the second half en route to a 20-7 victory for Allamunnic States. This four-cycle stretch may be the best in World Bowl history, as Allamunnic States went 56-5 with 4 consecutive final appearances and 3 titles in that span.

Fortunately for literally everybody else, the Regulars went into a bit of a rut for the next few cycles. This isn't to say they weren't a great team still, just that they weren't as ridiculously dominant come playoff time. It's not as if there was an amazing new crop of nations that appeared, just that the usual suspects were performing a little better. In the 64-team World Bowl XX hosted by Karditan, 8 groups of 8 battled for 14 matchdays. Only the top two of each group qualified for the playoffs, making the drop from 64 to 16 nations one of the toughest cuts in World Bowl history. Amazingly, most of the group winners still performed quite well despite the longer campaign. Qazox and German Zerabithea both went 14-0, and 13-1 teams included Darmen, Vettrera, Thrilledge, and the Royal Kingdom of Quebec. Thanks to the rather tight standards to qualify for the Round of 16, every single team that advanced had won at least 10 games. Funnily enough, Qazox and Allamunnic States matched up in the playoffs for the third straight cycle, this time with Qazox as a top seed and the Regulars as a "struggling" bottom seed. Allamunnic States still won by multiple scores, authoring a 30-21 upset, one of four upsets in the first round. The Regulars then had another playoff rematch from last cycle, facing Yesopalitha in the quarterfinals. This time, the Flames finally came out on top, blanking the Regulars 14-0. That wasn't even the best defensive win of the round, as hosts Karditan beat Darmen with a classic 3-0 scoreline. This set up a huge defensive face-off in the semifinals, which ironically had a fairly normal scoreline. Karditan defeated Yesopalitha 20-14 to reach their first final, where they'd face German Zerabithea fresh off a 34-20 whipping against Thrilledge. Finally back in the championship game, and now not having to face a Regular buzzsaw, German Zerabithea made the most of their opportunity. They had their way with the Karditani defense, winning 23-6 to capture their first and only championship. Their 18-0 record was the third time a World Bowl champion went undefeated, joining 15-0 Delaclava from XV and 12-0 Sarzonia from XI.

The temporary minor falloff of the Regulars came to the benefit of several longtime contenders who'd been searching for their second titles for years. Carasatoga's World Bowl XXI brought back the two group stage format, taking 56 nations in 8 groups of 7 down to 16 nations in 4 groups of 4. With the first group stage being single round robin, there was very little margin for error. Several established nations like Allamunnic States, German Zerabithea, Equestrian States and Darmen went 6-0 in the first stage, but so did relatively new nation Saintland. The second group stage was even more chaotic with its 3-matchday single round robin. The Equestrian States was the only 6-0 nation to also go undefeated in the second stage, plus Qazox and Osarius were the only top-10 ranked nations going into the tournament that qualified for the quarterfinals. Unsurprisingly, both won their quarterfinal games, pitting them against each other in the semifinals. On the other side, Cassadaigua and Taeshan filled out the final four. It may have been a bit of a surprise to see them all together this late in the tournament, but all of these nations had been well established at one time or another. Defenses reigned supreme in the semifinals, with Qazox winning 20-7 and Cassadaigua 10-7. This set up a championship match that was guaranteed to yield a new member to the two-timer club. Ultimately, the Qazox squad was much more prepared for the championship, winning a 12-6 affair that didn't see a touchdown until late in the fourth quarter. The Sharks were mostly lucky they didn't have to face Allamunnic States in the playoffs this time, but a ring's a ring!

World Bowl XXII was not the first time the Bowl featured a Casaran-style set of classification rounds in lieu of a traditional group stage. The hosting team of Free Republics and Saintland opted for a full 8 matchdays for all 68 participants plus several tiebreaker rounds to whittle the field to 32, where an 8 groups of 4 group stage was held. This was unlike WB VIII's staggered system, which featured anywhere from 2-4 matches for each team which led to a Round of 16. Because of the nature of Casaran scheduling, it would be nearly impossible for multiple teams to go undefeated. The one team that did was Saintland, completing the classification rounds unblemished at 8-0. German Zerabithea snagged the second seed, being the only team to go 7-1. A slew of teams went 6-2, but it didn't matter much, since the group stage draw used the World Bowl rankings rather than the Casaran results to determine the pots. Despite the 32-team format allowing for plenty of newer teams to play at the second level, the list of teams that qualified for the Round of 16 was pretty standard for the time. That being said, the biggest surprises among the group winners ended up being the ones that advanced to the semifinals, specifically West Guiana and Stretta. Meanwhile, when Cassadaigua outdueled Allamunnic States 6-9 in the quarterfinals, it set up a heavyweight bout with German Zerabithea in the other semifinal. Whoever won that matchup would be heavily favored in the championship game, and Cassadaigua boatraced German Zerabithea 58-30 to make their second consecutive championship game. That scoreline was one of the most lopsided in World Bowl semifinal history. West Guiana won their semi 31-20, earning the right to try and take down a hungry Team Cassadaigua. The championship was a lot closer than anybody expected it to be, but it was indeed Cassadaigua joining the two-timer club with a 20-19 victory, avenging their loss to Qazox the cycle before.

[Sarzonia]

A long group stage, one that's essentially the length of a Sarzonian gridball season, allows a team a margin for error that usually is absent in group stages of between six and 10 matches.

Thus, the Sarzonian national gridball team's 13-0 away defeat to No. 6 TJUN-ia isn't exactly the end of the world.

Manager Tyler Paige will still rue his team's inability to get Ty'Relle Clinton going as the burly running back only ran 18 times for 44 yards. Quarterback Cameron Stallworth completed 19-of-35 passes for 219 yards and threw two interceptions and was sacked five times. Both men blamed themselves for their struggles.

"I've gotta do a better job of finding the holes and hitting them," Clinton fumed. "The line did its job opening the holes. I just wasn't hitting them hard enough." He bristled at a question from a reporter about the offensive line struggling against the Jaguars front.

"Look, man, those guys got my back. They got Cam's back. They do a great job. It's on all of us to do our jobs."

Stallworth said he needed to make better reads.

"I had time to throw. I just didn't make the right reads and get the ball where I needed to," he said. Stallworth ran nine times for 19 yards, but the Stars were 1-for-4 on fourth-down conversions.

"We were in a position where we had to go for it to stay in the game," Paige said. "Against another opponent, maybe we punt or try a field goal in those situations, but we're still facing a top-10 team. It was a struggle for us on both sides of the ball." When a reporter pointed out that TJUN-ia's only touchdown came on a punt return, he said, "look, we may have kept their offence out of the end zone, but that doesn't mean we played a great game."

Sarzonia didn't get much of a break as they return home to face 41st ranked Natkr.

"We need to do a better job," Paige said. "Myself included."

[South Newlandia]

“Ewww! Why is it so wet here?”
Scott Yadav wasn’t the only one with this reaction as the Elephants arrived for their fifth World Bowl match, the first ever South Newlandian game played in Ratzupalfu.
“Yeah, that’s normal. It’s pretty awesome!”, replied Thomas Fantikos – of course, the former Egret was happy to return to his former home, having played four years for RUoN in college.
“Does it ever stop raining?”
“Not really. Sometimes it rains more than this though”
“And they didn’t think to put a roof on the stadium?”
“I don’t know what they were thinking, but they definitely didn’t put one”
Some South Newlandians had already checked the weather forecast, and more than one had run a search on whether you still get your money if you decide not to play – bad news for them, not showing up to the Jungledrom meant they wouldn’t get paid.
“Why on earth would they ever schedule a game here?”, Scott wanted to know.
“I’m pretty sure they just thought it would be funny. This place has also seen its fair share of unlikely upset wins over Banijan squads”
“I guess, but this is an absurdly small space. I cant count very high - but I think I could count the seats here”
Scott starts counting on his fingers. “Okay, well, at least its more seats than I have fingers”, he concludes.
“But how any quarterback would throw accurately in these conditions is beyond me”, Scott said.
“Well, the good news for us is – the Serpent Eagles with Kadesh Odika might’ve been able to get accurate throws elsewhere, and we don’t have that problem”

[Cardenao]

Well, there’s only one thing to do at a time like this. A time when you’re rushed for time because time is running out. You’ve spent your entire day looking forward to this specific time for several reasons. First and foremost, no more work! That is a good time. At this time of year, that’s made even better because it’s the World Bowl! At this time, you get to watch Bobby Dials and the Blue and Golds try to defend their title, they’re actually playing tonight against Tumbra! Recent reports suggest you’ll have a hard time proving that! Apparently they got into some business in the lands up north, so they can’t be the best chaps can they!?

The time……is 5pm. That’s what you’re looking forward to, that beautiful time when time becomes your time to do with as you please…and that’s watching Team Cardenao football BAYBEE.

That’s right boyos, the Blue and Golds are going again, right into battle against those laddos called Tumbra, who are unranked which is potentially very cool, before rolling into a massive game against Pafi, also unranked. Fortunately you’ll have me, your boy J-Tran here to break it all down so you spend your time having the best…time–

“Is it me or am I saying the word time a lot, like a lot a lot?” J-Tran asked his posse.

“Oh hey mann like…if you’re saying it then-then it’s a cool word you know what I mean?” His generic friend responded.

“Yeah it’s awesome I mean we’re having the time of our livessss,” his female generic friend responded as she cashed the easiest check of her life.

“Alright alright alright…go Team Nao!” One of Cardenao’s first social media stars affirmed.

[The Kytler Peninsulae]

"I don't get it. Why are we so good at gridiron all of a sudden?"

"We kind of were pretty good from the start?"

"That's kind of my point as well to be honest you know? Like, it's basically only Varn who play it, half of them don't want to be us to begin with..."

"I know! Like, do they even have all their best players?"

"I think there's like two or three who'd get in the team but explicitly don't want to be in it? But, like, we're top ten in the rankings, never missed the playoffs, 3-0 to start this World Bowl? Why are we good? We shouldn't be good at this!"

"Think of all the sporting things that make no sense in this multiverse. The beer leaguers, the garden gnomes, the beer leaguers beating the garden gnomes..."

"Hot damn that was a game!"

"...the random chess people from Hapilopper just dominating out of nowhere that one time?"

"And our lot before that!"

"Exactly! Like, the Kytlerians being good at gridiron, in the grand scheme of ridiculous things in sport, barely even cracks the top 1,100..."

The lampshade under which the two men were talking suddenly falls.

[Ranoria]

Week Two Is For Primetime:
Krauts Survive Second Half Comeback, Stun the Dragonflies in Overtime


Rylan Rodgers Jr took capitalized on an increased workload with over one hundred scrimmage yards

When you're playing one of the best teams in the world, you've got to pull out all the stops, and Ranoria did just that to take a commanding lead in the first half. Trick plays, adjusted personnel, the whole shebang as they geared up for the third meeting between two of the most accomplished teams in this tournament.

Ranoria went heavy on the defensive front for starters - Gideon Kearse got plenty of reps and Konstantin Vollmacht didn't come off the field, offering the most beef possible along the defensive line to try and limit Soredhinnau and Domoten's inside runs. It was effective to an extent - but their bread-and-butter stunts between Deandre Kelly and Gideon Kearse were getting nowhere. Between Kōki Matsunami and Otho Tilcott, the two veteran linemen had seen just about everything you can throw at them more times than they could count.

When the Dragonflies were on the field, the trenches were undoubtably the matchup to watch, and despite a few setbacks Ranoria definitely got the better of them early. Hell, outside of a 31 yard run on a pitch to Podhsek Soredhinnau, Ko-oren's run game was held to 2.9 yards per carry in the first two periods, and just one chip shot field goal. Akhello Volson was playing lockdown defense on Giles Costigan - sure, if he could get the ball, it would likely get ugly, but he wasn't even getting looks from Pier Masman early.

Thanks to that defense, Ranoria dominated the early time of possession, and boy did they capitalize on it. When's the last time you saw Ko-oren give up twenty points in one half?

It started off early - with a known weaker side of the left Dragonflies line matching up against the class of Ranorian OL in Goliath Castellan, the Krauts fully intended to take advantage with their own variation of the counter. With Rylan Rodgers Jr. in the backfield, rather than having him one step on the counter, he took the handoff to the right, then cut hard to the left with all the motion going the other way. With the linebackers making their reads there - you can guess what happened next.

Castellan cleared a massive hole, and the Butler had all the room he needed to take off. The linebackers had no chance to catch a guy with his speed, and the film study for the Dragonflies showed. With Rylan running along the sideline, they knew better than to assume he'd allow himself to be knocked out, so the first would-be tackler came hard, wrapping him and and stalling the star runner just long enough for Slotmoerbei to come in from the strong safety position and clean it up.

A nice save - but it had earned Ranoria nearly thirty yards, and they'd hand it to the same back on a stretch run to score on their opening drive.

Things didn't get much better in the first quarter. After a decent drive, two stuffed runs threatened to force a punt, so Pier Masman dropped back. He did the right thing - stepping up into a clean pocket to avoid Abram Fairbanks, but the wily veteran's spin move was enough to put right tackle Merten Merseman on skates, and Masman barely had time to react before the ball was clubbed out of his hands.

Sudden change situation, and on their second drive, Wagner-Young hit back-to-back completions. Both were short connections to Russell Farmer, not wanting to test the likes of Herman Jennings or Aoradora Aurisea this early. Both saw Rylan Rodgers Jr. swinging out on a fade route, never particularly getting so much as a look - which gave him just enough time on the next play to torch the Dragonflies stout secondary. The WBC champion was far from a pinpoint passer, but he didn't have to be. Russell Farmer was wide open deep downfield, with Jannik Nadine conveniently having cleared out the aforementioned Jennings on a go route. They connected, and Farmer took off, smashing through one tackler before he went down to pick up a nice 51 yard gain, and this time it'd be Ragnar Sampson hammering it into the end zone to make the score 14-3 in the first quarter, with Ranoria looking to run away with this one.

Things definitely slowed up in the second quarter, but that was alright. The teams attempted a combined four field goals - nailing three. Veteran kicker Shane Jackson hit his first two, both chip shots, only to look around a bit confused when none of his teammates wanted to celebrate with him. And then we saw why. On his third attempt, which would close out the half following an impressive two-minute drill, he lined up from forty yards and did the most impressive thing anyone had seen from a kicker to this point in the World Bowl. He doinked it.

Head coach Isaac Dieter pinched his nose and the entire blocking unit looked back, most with arms outstretched, wondering how the hell they had ended up with such an egregiously bad human being on their roster. Jackson just hung his head - words would've fallen on deaf ears anyway.

When they came out in the second half, the kicker was notably absent - in fact backup Clay Nielman booted a few through to warm up before things got rolling again.

"The guy legitimately has one job," Head coach Isaac Dieter said, "But this is why our general manager shows up to the games. Props to Jermaine [Elliot] for getting the paperwork filled out fast enough to cut Jackson from the roster between the two halves, really impressive performance there, and I've got to thank our equipment staff and security guys for getting him out of there as quickly as they did."

"What's that? How is he getting home? No clue. He's not part of the Krauts organization so that's not our problem."

-Krauts head coach Isaak Dieter on Shane Jackson's absence in the second half

Anyway, with that stain off their roster and out of their presence, you'd think the Krauts would actually play better. Instead, it was the opposite. Down 20-6, and with their offense looking downright stagnant, Pier Masman knew he had to take some chances, and checked out of the first play he got in the second half.

The veteran passer took a deep drop. One step left when he sensed pressure, but he had his target, and with one nice crow hop he accepted getting blasted by Gideon Kearse to let loose.

Throwing Akhello Volson's way was bold - but Giles Costigan is one hell of a player, and Ranoria's defense paid for leaving him on an island. When Volson failed to bat the ball away, Costigan managed to get away from the initial tackle attempt and that was all she wrote - 64 yards to the house to put the home team right back in this game.

Volson leaned down on his knees after the play, looked up at the scoreboard, then Costigan, then just shook his head. Not only was it the first touchdown he's allowed in the last two years, it was just the second score he's allowed in World Bowl play period.

And all of a sudden, Ranoria's offense was the one that couldn't move the ball to save their lives. The Dragonflies defense had gotten caught with a couple wrinkles, but it outside of those two plays early, they hadn't given up much ground anyway. They were showing why they're usually considered the class of defensive football now, allowing just two first downs on Ranoria's first three drives of the second half. And with another touchdown pass form Pier Masman, the game was all tied up by the end of the third quarter.

With their run game effectively neutralized, Vallienté Wagner-Young's name was called upon. He hadn't done much outside of the two-minute drill, sticking to quick completions to avoid turnovers in this game where room for error was almost nonexistent, but at some point you've got to rip the ball downfield, and he did. The cannon-armed passer put the defense on their heels quickly with back-to-back-to-back 15+ yard completions, and followed it up with a quick screen to RRJ for three.

With Ranoria starting to lean on their passing game, Ko-oren subbed in Caetano Fajardo, and that wrapped up the drive - Fajardo beat big Malachai Mauigoa off the snap and smashed into Wagner-Young, folding the big passer in two and forcing a field goal, but it was enough to get the Krauts their lead back, now midway through the fourth quarter.

Both teams almost going full air raid at this point, and both defenses were responding. Crazy what you can find out when two defensive powerhouses square off.

Rolan Monroe would be the closer for Ranoria on the next drive, dropping Pier Masman to force a punt and get the ball back. It wasn't quite four minute drill territory - so Ranoria wanted their dagger score, and after a couple futile handoffs, Wagner-Young dropped back again.

This time he'd pay. At thirty five years old, the veteran knew how to look off a defense, he knew which reads to make, but when Aoradora Aurisea is roaming at free safety, sometimes all your tricks just don't make a difference.

Angela Sauber never even had a shot at the ball as Aurisea ran under it and caught it with his chest with just a little hop, marking the second turnover of the game and the first interception of the campaign for Wagner-Young, setting up a short drive to make a game-tying field goal - Shane Jackson's earlier miss was coming back to haunt them now.

The home crowd was ecstatic, Ranoria had absolutely zero momentum, all their stars had made plays at some point, and it had been just enough to draw even with the Dragonflies through fifty nine and a half minutes.

Rylan Rodgers Jr got things started again on the final drive of regulation, picking up a nice thirteen yards on a draw, but it took too much time fighting for every inch. Wagner-Young connected with Russell Farmer over the middle again, and then hit Jannik Nadine on a quick curl for what was the wideout's first catch of the game - Herman Jennings had put on an absolute clinic to this point.

It was just enough to get them in Hail Mary range, and Wagner-Young launched an absolute missile downfield. It was a shockingly good pass, but the best secondary in the world was never going to let that fly, and none other than Jennings commandingly knocked the pass down to force overtime, his own celebration echoing that of the jubilant crowd around him. The Ranorian sideline was starting to show frustration - but they got perhaps their first win after halftime when they won the toss.

The pass had been the go-to for both teams in the second half. And that continued - Gideon Kearse made it three tackles for a loss on his stat sheet on the first play of overtime, and Pier Masman's attempt went wide on second down.

On third, he saw his opening, took it, and paid for it.

Sage Sterling isn't as fast as he used to be - but the World Bowl and NSCF champion strong safety didn't need to run back forty yards in this situation, and Bricks out-muscled the receiver to intercept Masman's pass in the end zone. His return was...less than impressive. He kinda took one and a half steps, started to knee it, and flopped all over the place, but in overtime, it didn't matter too much.

An electric home crowd was suddenly silenced, and the pendulum had swung all the way back in Ranoria's favor. Rylan Rodgers Jr let there be no doubt - picking up thirteen yards on an angle run on his first shot in overtime - can't be too careful with a Ranorian kicker. But after netting zero yards on three plays and managing to get the ball back into the middle, it was time.

Sure, there was some suspense. Ranorian kickers suck! But Clay Nielman blasted it through the uprights and that made it a ballgame. The sideline went nuts, audible in a stadium that otherwise suddenly took ont he atmosphere of a crypt. Nielman himself was left hanging - no one thought it was worth congratulating him on a chip shot field goal. But a win over Ko-oren was massive for a team in its second year back, looking to prove its mettle yet again. The Dragonflies aren’t the only lurking danger in the John Garrett group of course - HUElavia looms ready for a statement win themselves - but Ranoria’s got momentum on their side. Can they get one more upset two weeks from now?

[Ranoria]

This is your THIRD cutoff for World Bowl L! (Just the Ranorian half!) Even if your team is doing bad, look on the brightside, there's a lot of football left to play!.

Matchday Four

Bobby Dials Group
United States of Nova Calania 45–23 Sherpus
Quebec & Shingoryeo 35–14 Kamijiro
Vaishnavaria 10–34 Pafi
Cardenao 18–10 Tumbra

  Bobby Dials Group                 Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD
1 Cardenao                            4    4   0   129   56  +73    
2 Quebec & Shingoryeo                 4    3   1   153   77  +76     
3 Pafi                                4    3   1    73   67   +6     
4 Kamijiro                            4    2   2    99   69  +30     
5 United States of Nova Calania       4    2   2   108  118  −10    
6 Sherpus                             4    1   3    84  119  −35     
7 Tumbra                              4    1   3    67  132  −65     
8 Vaishnavaria                        4    0   4    48  123  −75

Isaka Jawara Group
Crpostran 10–27 South Newlandia
Banija 36–6 Katzeburg
Busoga Islands 52–3 Darmen
United States of Devonta 26–20 Chromatika

  Isaka Jawara Group                Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD
1 South Newlandia                     4    4   0   121   71  +50   
2 Banija                              4    3   1   115   53  +62     
3 Crpostran                           4    3   1    56   34  +22     
4 Busoga Islands                      4    2   2    81   78   +3    
5 Darmen                              4    2   2    76  124  −48     
6 Chromatika                          4    1   3   106   91  +15     
7 United States of Devonta            4    1   3    38   73  −35    
8 Katzeburg                           4    0   4    43  112  −69

Group Dustin Beck
Norway-Sweden-Finland 23–0 Juvencus
Newmanistan 24–34 New Umoja
South Americanastan 6–7 The Kytler Peninsulae
Drawkland 46–17 Grand Exultia

  Group Dustin Beck                 Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD
1 The Kytler Peninsulae               4    4   0   119   29  +90 
2 Drawkland                           4    4   0   147   72  +75
3 Norway-Sweden-Finland               4    2   2   111  102   +9
4 New Umoja                           4    2   2    91  142  −51     
5 South Americanastan                 4    1   3    96   75  +21     
6 Juvencus                            4    1   3    40   77  −37     
7 Newmanistan                         4    1   3    66  108  −42     
8 Grand Exultia                       4    1   3    39  104  −65

Matchday Five

Bobby Dials Group
Tumbra 3–15 United States of Nova Calania
Pafi 34–54 Cardenao
Kamijiro 29–13 Vaishnavaria
Sherpus 6–28 Quebec & Shingoryeo

  Bobby Dials Group                 Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD
1 Cardenao                            5    5   0   183   90  +93    
2 Quebec & Shingoryeo                 5    4   1   181   83  +98    
3 Kamijiro                            5    3   2   128   82  +46     
4 United States of Nova Calania       5    3   2   123  121   +2     
5 Pafi                                5    3   2   107  121  −14     
6 Sherpus                             5    1   4    90  147  −57     
7 Tumbra                              5    1   4    70  147  −77     
8 Vaishnavaria                        5    0   5    61  152  −91

Isaka Jawara Group
Chromatika 16–9 Crpostran
Darmen 9–14 United States of Devonta
Katzeburg 47–31 Busoga Islands
South Newlandia 34–19 Banija

  Isaka Jawara Group                Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD
1 South Newlandia                     5    5   0   155   90  +65    
2 Banija                              5    3   2   134   87  +47     
3 Crpostran                           5    3   2    65   50  +15     
4 Chromatika                          5    2   3   122  100  +22     
5 Busoga Islands                      5    2   3   112  125  −13     
6 United States of Devonta            5    2   3    52   82  −30     
7 Darmen                              5    2   3    85  138  −53     
8 Katzeburg                           5    1   4    90  143  −53

Group Dustin Beck
Grand Exultia 45–31 Norway-Sweden-Finland
The Kytler Peninsulae 50–20 Drawkland
New Umoja 27–29 South Americanastan
Juvencus 16–27 Newmanistan

  Group Dustin Beck                 Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 The Kytler Peninsulae               5    5   0   169   49 +120    
2 Drawkland                           5    4   1   167  122  +45    
3 South Americanastan                 5    2   3   125  102  +23     
4 Norway-Sweden-Finland               5    2   3   142  147   −5     
5 Newmanistan                         5    2   3    93  124  −31     
6 Grand Exultia                       5    2   3    84  135  −51     
7 New Umoja                           5    2   3   118  171  −53     
8 Juvencus                            5    1   4    56  104  −48

[Banija]

RP Prompt: We have groups named after five different legends of the World Bowl. This cutoff we'll talk about Gavin Davis.

Gavin Davis is a Sarzonian coach- who was a player for Sarzonia, and then, eventually coached them to a World Bowl title at WB 48. Talk about the greatest coach in your country's history. Preferably NT coach, or you can talk about your current one- or some domestic coach, past or present. Tell us everything about them- their coaching philosphy, their play style, what makes them so successful, and then their path to head coaching stardom- were they always destined, or did they have to grind their way up from very small jobs to get to the big time?

(Reminder that RP Prompt can be amended or ignored by users at their choosing. There is no punishment for ignoring the prompt, nor any bonus for following it).

OOC reminder that penalties have started for not having your roster in, so if you haven't yet, get those rosters in!

Matchday 4 Scores

Group Gavin Davis
Natkr 9–25 Rouyoute
Delaclava 16–42 Valanora
TJUN-ia 38–6 Quirhoshe
Sarzonia 61–24 East Lithuania

  Group Gavin Davis      Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 TJUN-ia                  4    4   0   149   19 +130
2 Valanora                 4    3   1   121   90  +31
3 Sarzonia                 4    3   1   147   72  +75
4 Rouyoute                 4    3   1   108   72  +36
5 Delaclava                4    2   2   121  131  −10
6 Natkr                    4    1   3    62  113  −51
7 Quirhoshe                4    0   4    45  130  −85
8 East Lithuania           4    0   4    64  190 −126

Group John Garrett
Terefuxe 16–17 Equestria
Barnettsville 16–17 Of the Golden Harp
Ko-oren 29–10 New Rotterdam City
Ranoria 23–7 HUElavia

  Group John Garrett     Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Ranoria                  4    4   0   134   36  +98
2 New Rotterdam City       4    3   1    81   67  +14
3 Of the Golden Harp       4    3   1    88   92   −4
4 Ko-oren                  4    2   2   103   69  +34
5 Equestria                4    2   2    62   61   +1
6 Barnettsville            4    1   3    46   90  −44
7 HUElavia                 4    1   3    66   70   −4
8 Terefuxe                 4    0   4    58  153  −95

Matchday 5 Scores

Group Gavin Davis
East Lithuania 16–13 Natkr
Quirhoshe 0–21 Sarzonia
Valanora 13–7 TJUN-ia
Rouyoute 31–35 Delaclava

  Group Gavin Davis      Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Valanora                 5    4   1   134   97  +37
2 TJUN-ia                  5    4   1   156   32 +124
3 Sarzonia                 5    4   1   168   72  +96
4 Delaclava                5    3   2   156  162   −6
5 Rouyoute                 5    3   2   139  107  +32
6 East Lithuania           5    1   4    80  203 −123
7 Natkr                    5    1   4    75  129  −54
8 Quirhoshe                5    0   5    45  151 −106

Group John Garrett
HUElavia 30–7 Terefuxe
New Rotterdam City 0–10 Ranoria
Of the Golden Harp 10–0 Ko-oren
Equestria 67–20 Barnettsville

  Group John Garrett     Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Ranoria                  5    5   0   144   36 +108
2 Of the Golden Harp       5    4   1    98   92   +6
3 New Rotterdam City       5    3   2    81   77   +4
4 Equestria                5    3   2   129   81  +48
5 HUElavia                 5    2   3    96   77  +19
6 Ko-oren                  5    2   3   103   79  +24
7 Barnettsville            5    1   4    66  157  −91
8 Terefuxe                 5    0   5    65  183 −118

[Katzeburg]

HEARTBREAK FOR WILDCATS AS PERFECT RECORD GOES UP IN SMOKE AGAINST ISLANDERS

By Richard Rider

It was a sombre mood at Aberstadt Stadium as the perfect start to the Katzeburgian Wildcats campaign to win the World Bowl L championship came to an end, running out to a 47-31 win over Busoga Islands.

The heartbreaking result, the first win of the Wildcats run in this cycle’s World Bowl, leaves the side careening off world record pace and any hopes supporters had of the perfect 0-14 run which would have led them to long-lasting glory. The side had earlier continued on its brilliant pace for the title with a 36-6 beatdown by world number 3 Banija, which left the side as just one of five sides left on perfect pace after the first four matchdays. But a good showing of attacking football came out of nowhere in the side’s clash with the Busoga Islands, sickening Katzeburgians with the quality of the side’s running on full show - running in seven touchdowns on their way to a 16 point victory over the unranked islanders.

“What a disgusting display we just witnessed in there,” said disgruntled fan and second year UoA journalism student Josh Monatague after the win over Busoga Islands. “We have been one of the teams to easily beat so far this World Bowl and I really thought we had a good shot at claiming the World Bowl L championship. But that was just too good of a win to keep us anywhere in the mix now, and I’m devastated.”

“It’s brilliant to see the side pick up a win!” said sarcastic ASU student Mark Jeffries. “Genuinely, it’s been clear the team has been working hard behind the scenes to improve that cohesion between the two universities, and coach Sydney has to get some credit for getting us over the line for a win. There’s still plenty of football left, so hopefully we can make a push up the ladder over the rest of the group stage.”

The result has sent shockwaves through the Katzeburgian camp, with coach Cameron Sydney joking he’d be keen to see results continue to improve on the field now that the perfect start has been broken.

“It’s great to finally get that duck off our backs and pick up a win,” Coach Sydney said, sincerely. “We’ve had a real tough go of it so far and the results weren’t where we want them, but the squad had really come together in that dressing room and that’s what matters to me. If we can bring that cohesive unit out here again, like we did against Busoga, we won’t be bottom of the group for long.”

Due to incredibly overwhelming demand from Lampoon supporters, we will continue to follow along with the World Bowl L championship over the rest of the group stage, if only to serve as a reminder of what could have been for our boys. The race for a perfect 0-14 performance is still on the cards for three teams - with Vaishnavaria, Quirhoshe, and Terefuxe racing to brilliant 0-5 starts. Long-time Lampoon readers will no doubt remember that our Wildcats played their part in Terefuxe’s decline in form last World Bowl, storming to our biggest ever victory on the international stage - a 56-3 victory in what was a truly abhorrent display of good football from Katzeburg.

The Wildcats can remain in contention with good showings in their next two games - the side will host world number 5 Chromatika on matchday 7 in what is already being considered a 100% certain loss for the Wildcats, but it will be their matchday 6 clash against the United States of Devonta which could be a potential banana peel game for the side. Our trusted bookmakers out the back of Borchard Hall have given the Wildcats the favourites tag for the clash, thanks to their higher world ranking, but any true follower of the sport will know that this will handily be a comfortable loss for our boys in blue.

[United States of Nova Calania]

Two wins against low ranked teams

Saint-Jean-Jacques-sur-Mer - Following losses against Cardenao and Kamijiro, Nova Calania received Sherpus at home in Saint-Jean-Jacques-sur-Mer. The weather was a little cold (25 °C) and cloudy, but luckily no rain. Sherpus started off with the ball in the 1st quarter and Starting Quarterback threw a 15 yards touchdown pass on their first drive. Nova Calania tied the game immediately when Anne-Élisabeth Guirguis caught Arielle Bellerose-Deslongchamps' 22 yards pass into the endzone. Guillaume Bibeau-Babeux increased Nova Calania's lead with a rushing touchdown on a 2nd and 3 at the 18 yards line. The score after the 1st quarter was 14-7 Nova Calania. The Tapirs increased their lead early in the 2nd quarter with a 13 yards passing touchdown from Arielle Bellerose-Deslongchamps to Rachel Lavigueur. Sherpus answered on their next drive with a 27 yards field goal. Nova Calania followed with a 104 yards kickoff return touchdown from Anne-Élisabeth Guirguis. Arielle Bellerose-Deslongchamps made a 27 yards touchdown pass to François-Xavier Malboeuf within the two minutes warning and it was 35-10 at halftime. Malboeuf's little sister, Lily-Rose, is on the national association football roster,

Starting Quarterback passed in the endzone to Wide Receiver 2 for a 26 yards touchdown midway in the 3rd quarter. They tried the 2 points conversion but the ball was batted down by Raphaël Casgrain. The score after 3 quarters was 35-16 Tapirs. Ji-yoo Han kicked a 35 yards field goal early in the 4th quarter. Late in the 4th quarter, Starting Quarterback's pass was intercepted by Félix Lajeunesse-Flanagan who returned the ball to the endzone for a pick six. Lajeunesse-Flanagan has two little brothers who play hockey with the Saint-Jean-Jacques Kraken and one of them is on the national hockey team roster. Sherpus' offense returned onto the field for a last drive and with just a minute remaining, Starting Quarterback threw a 25 yards touchdown pass. The kick was good and the final score was 45-23 Nova Calania.

SHERPUS          7   3   6   7  -  23
NOVA CALANIA    14  21   0  10  -  45

GAME SUMMARY

1st quarter
11:14 TOUCHDOWN SHERPUS - Starting Quarterback passes to Tight End 1 for 15 yards - Extra point good.
6:46 TOUCHDOWN NOVA CALANIA - Arielle Bellerose-Deslongchamps passes to Anne-Élisabeth Guirguis for 22 yards - Extra point good.
1:24 TOUCHDOWN NOVA CALANIA - Guillaume Bibeau-Babeux runs for 18 yards - Extra point good.
2nd quarter
12:04 TOUCHDOWN NOVA CALANIA - Arielle Bellerose-Deslongchamps passes to Rachel Lavigueur for 13 yards - Extra point good.
8:57 FIELD GOAL SHERPUS - Kicker's 27 yards kick is good.
8:45 TOUCHDOWN NOVA CALANIA - 104 yards kickoff return by Anne-Élisabeth Guirguis - Extra point good.
0:32 TOUCHDOWN NOVA CALANIA - Arielle Bellerose-Deslongchamps passes to François-Xavier Malboeuf for 27 yards - Extra point good.
3rd quarter
7:25 TOUCHDOWN SHERPUS - Starting Quarterback passes to Wide receiver 2 for 26 yards - Two points conversion failed.
4th quarter
12:20 FIELD GOAL NOVA CALANIA - Ji-yoo Han's 35 yards kick is good.
2:35 TOUCHDOWN NOVA CALANIA - 56 yards interception return by Félix Lajeunesse-Flanagan - Extra point good.
0:51 TOUCHDOWN SHERPUS - Starting Quarterback passes to Wide Receiver 1 for 25 yards - Extra point good.

Tumbra - On week 5, Nova Calania travelled to Tumbra and beat them 15-3. Nova Calania wasn't able to score a single touchdown against Tumbra because they play post (gridiron) football with a poor offense and a strong defense. Tumbra started off with the ball in the 1st half and punted on their first drive. Nova Calania followed with a 38 yards field goal on their first drive and added 3 more points late in the 1st quarter on a 29 yards field goal. Nova Calania had the ball in Tumbra's territory midway in the 2nd quarter but Arielle Bellerose-Deslongchamps' pass intended to Anne-Élisabeth Guirguis was intercepted by Thom Kwaitkowski. Tumbra followed with a 41 yards field goal from Ross Henderson. The score at halftime was 6-3 Nova Calania.

Nova Calania made a 48 yards field goal midway in the 3rd quarter. Early in the 4th quarter, Zachary Liew's pass intended to Graham Vennick was intercepted by Rosalie McGowan and she returned the ball until she was pushed out of bounds at the 4 yards line in Tumbra territory. Nova Calania's goalline offense was unable to score and, on a 4th and goal at the 2 yards line, Ji-yoo Han made a 19 yards field goal. Nova Calania made another field goal late in the 4th quarter and won 15-3.

Nova Calania is currently in 3rd place in the standings, tied with Kamijiro and Pafi, with 3 wins and 2 losses. Cardenao tops the Bobby Dials group with 5 wins in 5 games, followed by Quebec & Shingoryeo which their only loss was in overtime against Cardenao. On matchday 6, the Tapirs will receive Quebec & Shingoryeo in Saint-Jean-Jacques-sur-Mer. Heavy rain is expected to fall at least in the 1st half but the gridiron match is still expected to be played. On week 7, the Tapirs will travel to Pafi, a pesky unranked team with 3 wins and 2 losses.

Injury Report			
		                                vs Québec	vs Pafi
G Ryan McConnachie	  Foot	                Probable	100% healthy
DT Maximilien Kowalczyk	  Shoulder	        Out	        Out
WR Ryleigh O'Shaughnessy  Hamstring strain      Doubtful	Questionnable

NOVA CALANIA    6   0   3   6  -  15
TUMBRA          0   3   0   0  -   3

GAME SUMMARY

1st quarter
8:45 FIELD GOAL NOVA CALANIA - Ji-yoo Han's 38 yards kick is good.
2:38 FIELD GOAL NOVA CALANIA - Ji-yoo Han's 29 yards kick is good.
2nd quarter
8:57 FIELD GOAL TUMBRA - Ross Henderson's 41 yards kick is good.
3rd quarter
5:34 FIELD GOAL NOVA CALANIA - Ji-yoo Han's 48 yards kick is good.
4th quarter
9:16 FIELD GOAL NOVA CALANIA - Ji-yoo Han's 19 yards kick is good.
3:40 FIELD GOAL NOVA CALANIA - Ji-yoo Han's 32 yards kick is good.

Jean-Alexandre Guindon

[Grand Exultia]

Grand Exultia Fans' Perspective: We want to hear your voices

Tight group doesn’t diminish our chances for progress

I for one cannot be happier watching our fledgling stars battle it out on the gridiron. I’m not going to call any delusional or cynical even when the shoe might fit but hey, we’re having fun aren’t we?

Another pair of matchdays another pair of results you may have been able to guess. Anybody who would guess/predict/believe we could beat Drawkland definitely need their head examined because facing the number one…NUMBER ONE! side at their place was more than an uphill task and that 46-17 scoreline shows just that this was quickly followed by a match that I feel even the most cynical of posters would back our Titans, a fixture under the protection of the Sylvanum Arcanis against the unranked Norway-Sweden-Finland which saw our offense click together to win 45-31.

Our team is improving, that much is evident, at least I think so?! We recorded the most amount of points we’ve ever scored against Drawkland, nothing to scream about with just 17 points but progression! I know we let up 46 points but come on, that Drawkland team are dangerous and we’re still finding our feet, settling into our groove y’know.

Then we scored even more points against Norway-Sweden-Finland putting up a record 45 points, also conceding a second highest of 31 so our defence hasn’t really woken up yet but let’s focus on the positives.

Progression takes time, progression takes patience and progression takes belief. I, like the first commenter, would believe there is more to come from this outfit, more growth and more desire as the rewards become real… almost tangible but until then we will need to learn to grind out results.

Hopefully our defence can wake up and start holding back some of the teams like we know they should. It’s a glittering performance going forward but defensively, right now, it is painful, you expect to concede on each drive and when they do stall the drive it doesn’t feel like it takes long until we’re back on the back foot.

We’ll come back stronger, we do have two hard games coming up, Home to The Kytler Peninsulae another top team and the green machine is in fine flawless form, don’t expect a lot there. Then we travel to New Umoja, the lowest ranked team we will face in the group so an uphill challenge without a doubt but with enough belief anything is possible.

[Ko-oren]

What's next for Ko-oren's second sport?

Attendances dipping in Ko-orenite Pro Gridiron (KPG). Fewer children pick up the sport due to health concerns. Immense roster turnover for all twelve KPG teams - both at the top where players are reserved by the national team, and at the bottom where players opt to go for non-athletic careers. No World Bowl quarterfinal won in five editions. Or we could point at more recent results of the national team: 5-4 in the group, barely getting through to the knockouts, and a strange 2-3 record now. Losses to Of the Golden Harp, Ranoria, and HUElavia, with the latter especially a beatdown.

Take your problems on one at a time. It could seem like one big problem that needs a single panacea, but that's unlikely. You could look towards other sports and their issues - where similar style games like rugby union and league are having similar struggles - or simply tackle one problem before making too many changes to the entire system.

Health and safety remain paramount for the KPG and all underlying leagues - but the issue remains that gridiron players, especially linemen, take too many hits to the head, simply as part of the game. And here you will find some similarities to the rugby codes, where amateur and youth clubs identified the same factor. Switching to a flag-only approach until a certain age will help, but it will mean that linemen especially will be able to play much later and that flag football skills don't translate to trench gameplay. Citing worries from doctors, parents are increasingly looking for baseball, cricket, as well as the newly opened avenue for individual and Olympic sports, for their kids to play.

But that's not a Ko-oren-only issue. Other nations are dealing with the same thing, presumably, barring a novel way to teach blocking and rushing, or significantly advanced medical science.

Then we look at the top of our game, starting with the pro clubs. They can still find some incredible players to come into the league, but often lose them after a year or two to the national team, and are unable to find suitable replacement elsewhere in the Second Division. In the past this has led to a few teams being wholly overpowered because they were able to hold on to a large group of players for multiple years on one (or both) side of the ball: keep your above-average defence together for half a decade under decent leadership and you too will be able to find success.

A negative side effect is that the Noordrug Astronauts, running champions, are entering next season as the 12th and worst projected team: success means losing your best to the national team (aside from a few retirements that would have happened earlier if it weren't for a wide-open championship window). A positive side effect is that teams actively have to choose what to invest in, and with more offensive talent coming into the league - as opposed to all the best players being pushed into defence - and that leads to a very competitive league. There's a fairly big group of contending teams, without feeling like results being completely random, like the Centaurs hoping to finally get what they deserve, the Emperors trying to bring a title to the west coast, or the Godspeed trying to bring back greatness to the city that demands so much success.

Looking beyond to the top of the top: the national team. It's hard to predict what's next: they'll grab the best of the KPG when the current core drop off - looking at 31-year old corner Jennings first and foremost, or maybe even free safety Aurisea, at which point the last parts of a once-great defence will have left, and we're truly on to the next generation. What doesn't help is that players like yAwbar, Bedigelnen and Nuljuten, Oordveld, Merseman - all playing pivotal positions and often as starters, too - were never seen as the best the KPG had to offer, but a shortage at the position simply means that this is it. The centre of gravity, as it were, of the Dragonflies, has shifted from defence to offence, but the offence is still only asked to stay on the field and milk the clock while the defence isn't able to pull off the plays they used to.

That said, some changes have already been made. Dhigethen is the new head coach of the national team, with a new duo of coordinators to support him: Thwaethen on the offensive side and definitely not one to make the offence simply a keepaway affair, and Detwegwelafan on the defensive side, as one to look for a new direction for our defence to go in.

Perhaps it's best to await the results of a new captain before rocking the entire boat while he's still getting settled. Either way, it's interesting times for Ko-orenite gridiron.

[HUElavia]

Ranoria 23–7 HUElavia
(7-7, 3-0, 6-0, 7-0)

HUElavia 30–7 Terefuxe
(0-7, 10-0, 10-0, 10-0)

Live from a Radio Station in HUElavia...

"This is Mateo Fernandes on 102.5, T H E G R I D, THE No. 1 Sports Talk show on Radio throughout HUElavia, we've been talking about the nation's World Bowl, the stats and such, so we're gonna take a caller here to see their input. Let's get our first caller, you're on the air."

"Hi, Mateo?"

"Hey, good evening! What's your name caller? Where are you calling from?"

"Joao. from Portimao."

"Cool, cool. What's your thought on this tournament so far?"

"Well Mateo, I'm gonna be honest with you: This team is horrid."

"Ooh! What makes you want to say that?"

"Well, we're supposed to be ranked 13th in the multiverse and we're supposed to be one of the stronger teams in the multiverse."

"Yeah, that is true."

"So, tell me why we've been clapped twice by inferior teams?"

*Laughing* "Hey man, like the saying goes, 'Any given Sunday.'"

"Nononono, seriously. We legit are horrid now. We should be sitting 4-1, in a direct spot, yet here we are at 5th with a 2-3 record."

"I mean, yeah, it has been a rough tournament so far."

"Genuinely, the HGFA should get the entire sack. We haven't been the same since World Bowl 48, when Lord knows what happened there."

"Yeah, that was a surprising elimination back then."

"But this team just feels... uninspired. Like, it's the same roster from a few years ago. Really? You couldn't get some college kids to join along? You couldn't get some promising talent from the HGFL?"

"Well, the team was solid and had promise in the last edition."

"And what did that promise give us? A round-of-16 exit. What is it giving us? A 2-3 start."

"What do you propose doing then?"

"Bench Duarte. He hasn't been him so far. Terrible reads, gets picked, he isn't showing the spark he had in the last cycle. And someone please give our receivers hands. Hell, I'll donate mine's if I have to!"

*Laughter*

"Seriously! We've dropped so many bombs, so many promising plays just fall incomplete. My heart and gut sink when that ball is coming down only to be swatted away or hit to the ground."

"Yeah, quite some miscues and terrible moments for it to be falling short, I can agree with you."

"And this defense is just letting our opponents run them a train! Like, we welcome them into our homes, treat them like they're the masters of the property."

*Laughter*

"Oogami has only been the main bright spot, the man is playing his heart out on every rep he gets. Obama has also been fun to watch, he's been great terrorizing offenses. Everyone else is just mid. Terribly, terribly, mid. And at least, at least, our kicking with Lutz has been great. The man is a machine!"

"Yeah, those three have been great spots for this team."

"But the coaching staff is just... Ugh! Sack them! Sack them all!"

"Really? Especially a legend like Coach Schneiderman? He's been historic with HUElavia."

"Hey, with all due respect, Coach Schneiderman is a legend in the sport, but his time is up. He ought to just retire and be a family man. We need fresh blood. Bring up another young gun again."

"Do you think that can help the team?"

"Well, it'd be start. We're so one-dimensional on our play and we ought to use the run more. Uche is another bright spot on the team, it's always a joy to see him barrel through defenses. But this team needs a rebuild."

*Laughter* "You're calling for a rebuild already? We're only 5 games through the group stage, 9 left to go!"

"Yeah, but the games come and we're choking and struggling. We should've changed staff after World Bowl 49, but here we are. I love this team and our country, but I expect more from them. We're not playing to our expectations and standards and that's all I could want from this team."

"True, true. Good to see someone being passionate for the team."

"Yeah, thanks. That's all I wanted to get off my chest, and I want to be positive, but the games we've played haven't really given us that."

"Thanks for your call Joao, take it easy add hopefully our team can do well. Go HUElavia!"

*Joao hangs up*

"Alright everyone, we'll take a quick commercial break before taking more calls and going along the country for other sporting results. Stay tuned, get some nice food and drinks, relax and have a nice time on 102.5 T H E G R I D."

[Kamijiro]

Big Break for Jirō Island Gridiron! Paul Salieri "Discovers Abandoned Stadium."

Oh. Well, maybe we spoke too soon about a big break. The field is literally covered in trees. And on top of that, there are these strange 'danger' and 'high radiation' signs everywhere.

The field is right next to that power plant where nothing happened (according to the Palace) and up until recently, had been blocked from the public due to 'unrelated circumstances.'

So uh... yeah! If you want to come play gridiron football at good ol' Paulie's place, feel free! The metallic taste in your mouth is probably just the result of you licking too many batteries as a kid.

Of course, when Paul showed the rest of the team this discovery, it ended with everybody saying 'Paul, you're a fucking moron.' So, maybe don't go try to play gridiron at Paul's? Because he isn't gonna be there.

-

Instead, when Quebec & Shingoryeo rolled up to town to take on these bozos, they played on the second-worst field they've had to use to date. This one was on a hill with a 10 degree incline. Whoops.

Not like it mattered much, anyway. Quebec & Shingoryeo whooped their asses.

"Doesn't seem fair, we have to play against two teams at the same time. Why do they get to have Quebec AND Shingoryeo?"

"Shut up, Paul."

Oh, and the bit about this being the SECOND-worst field? That's because one of the fields was a farmer's plot of land and it had been freshly fertilized. With manure. Every tackle ended with people covered in shit.

-

The morons went on the road to Vaishnavaria next. Nothing special about that game except for how they managed to get to 29 points. Eleven safties and a touchdown and an extra point. Bet that's a new one, too.

[The Kytler Peninsulae]

The first three quarters of action at Zube Olympic Stadium had been surprising enough. The Kytlerian Green Machine were trading blows pretty evenly with Drawkland, the top-ranked team in the multiverse, and actually took a 22-20 lead into the fourth quarter as they followed up their second touchdown with a pre-emptive decision to go for two that worked out - "we had a play we trusted and we thought we'd need every bit of help we could get against the Grid Corps" - while the visitors went 1-for-3 on their own two-point conversions, which they always attempt after first-half touchdowns.

But the Grid Corps were driving, and their first play of the fourth quarter was a second-and-goal from the 6.

What happened next will forever be remembered as one of those Kytlerian sporting moments. The kind that get recapped ever more flamboyantly through the generations, both in retrospective documentaries and in tales told to children and grandchildren, about the time when, inexplicably, that happened. Kerry Rush's Olympic gold. The first Elephant Chess Cup title, from the first ever sporting representatives of Giisost's reopened nation. This Green Machine themselves - to quote the KBT commentator Mike Roberts - actually beating Chromatika.

And now this. Logan Oakley took the snap for that first play of the final quarter and looked to target star veteran tight end Johnathan Kimbrough headed for the corner. He never got it to Kimbrough. Hit as he threw by the onrushing nose tackle Mike Rose, the ball was a dead duck that fell directly into the path of safety Ash Bonnell, who picked the ball up in stride and charged unopposed into the painted area for a 96-yard pick-six to raucous acclaim from most of the 59,840 in the crowd. With the Daffyd Nevins PAT, the Green Machine had a two-score lead, and their fans were honestly already pinching themselves.

Things had only just started. 61-year-old immortal running back Jack Hoy, the Laborious Hawk of gridiron, shockingly fumbled the kickoff return - and backup safety Arne van Damme scooped up the bouncing ball and housed it. Extra point good, the Green Machine were 36-20 up on the Grid Corps, and something seismic was brewing. Or literally happening, given that the bouncing Green Machine fans inside the ZOS did get picked up by seismographs at the University of Zube.

Six plays later, those seismographs would be in action again. Oakley fired a pass in front of the outbreaking Kimbrough looking for a catch-and-run down the sideline, but Martijn van der Sar jumped the route, and when he gets an opportunity for a pick-six he tends to take it. Even as his career nears its end, that was the case here, and now it was 43-20. When the Grid Corps turned the ball over on downs on their next possession with 5:21 to go, John Rockford came in at quarterback. Even in this era of the Green Machine being established near the top of the sport, you still assume that a backup QB entering the field in the fourth quarter would come from the opposite scenario. You know the meme.



Rockford himself punched the ball in on a 12-yard rush with 2:08 to play and when the PAT was good, the score was officially in OMGWTFBBQ territory with extra hot sauce. As an audibly staggered Roberts put it in the KBT booth: "And that's fifty. Fifty. FIFTY!"

There will surely never be another night like this in Kytlerian gridiron history. Even if the Green Machine somehow become a team that can freaking win the whole shebang - and that seems like less of a joke now than it did before - it's hard to imagine ever replicating the exploding-head factor of the night they put 50 on Drawkland.

[Busoga Islands]

Part 1
Part 2 (Written by Quebec)
Part 3
Part 4

Unay Kuru, the Busogan Attorney General, sitting at his desk

For the first time in Busogan history, the Presidential election was simply too close to call. There have been 5 in Busoga's history- all won by the same party, and all of them pretty much blowouts. The founder of the nation, Ebrahim Razav, the first ever President of this Islamic Republic, won his election with 75% of the vote, and then Delbin Kasekende has had four straight elections cycles where he was earning between 60 and 65% of the popular vote. This kind of power for an incumbent party, in the context of the Busoga Islands, made sense. This was the same party that had brought the Busoga Islands to their independence- they stood up against Matthias Mutebi's tyranny, launched an independence war, were able to get foreign support from Baker Park and the Equestrian States, and get their independence internationally recognized. Not only that- they've been able to really be a pole for Busoga's place in the world.

They were able to do that, earn dominant party status, by kind of being a 'jack of all trades' political party. They were not particularly ideological- although they were certainly secular leaning, despite officially naming the country an Islamic Republic. On foreign policy, they've earned Busoga's place in an ever-changing world- surviving the Anaia split, and the departure from AO into Arrosia, with class. They repaired relations with the Kingdom of Banija, and unlocked plenty of benefits by doing that- including getting normal relations with Quebec, and getting entry into the Quebecois Commonwealth, which had long been blocked by the Kingdom. But they were not too reliant on any one power either- while Equestria was their biggest ally, followed closely by Baker Park, Lakiska had positive relations with everyone around them- including Siovanija & Teusland, Valanora, Quebec, etc...

Consistent economic growth, rapid raising of living standards, and doing so without the Banijan discovery of oil- this is what won parties elections. Of course, that would not go on forever- but this was not a time that the party expected to lose. But with President Kasekende running for a fifth term, there was voter fatigue, but just a little bit. Much more importantly, however, were the stunning events that transpired from this election. The Kurtar assassination, leading to the revelation that the President skipped a national security briefing, followed by a dramatic denouncement of the President by Kurtar's widow, and a punishing social media campaign by the opposition, had turned the election on its head. Polling was not only within the margin of error- that dumbass, Orag Saglik, was in the electoral lead- and if he was in the lead, it was quite a reasonable possibility that he would straight up win the election outright, yes?

Saglik was not that impressive of a candidate. But the campaign he was running- slick. The Attorney General, however, could not be focused on the President at the moment. He was focused on the Hotel Bombing in Quebec. He had just finished a meeting with his Quebecois counterpart, over the phone, as they had an intense discussion about cooperation in regards to these attacks. But as he was getting ready to go back to work, one of his aides came in, knocking on the door.

"If this doesn't have to do with the bombing," The Attorney General said. "Please, go away."

"Sir, this is of the utmost importance- you'll have to see this. You'll want to bring this to the President."

"The President?" The Attorney General asked. "Oh boy, I'll have to look at this." And the aide dropped it on his desk. As he read the docs, his eyes widened. He was going to make a summary. What the hell was going on in the Busoga Islands...

Busogan Polling(+/- 3.5% margin for error)

Presidential Polling

Orag Saglik - 49%
Delbin Kasekende - 47%

---

The Lakiska Daily

Busogan gridiron gets off to an 'OK' start at World Bowl L, sit in the middle of the pack at 2-3 after five games

LAKISKA, SOUTH ISLAND, BUSOGA ISLANDS- It was always going to be a long climb to success at the World Bowl for the Busogans. Stunning quick success in college- but that's rarely replicated at the professional level. "Look, 2-3 is probably right about where we expect them to be." Said a Busogan sports analyst on the news. "This team is a decent team- not great, not awful, but there are a bunch of teams that are straight up elite in this group. It's not going to be easy getting out of the Isaka Jawara group, but with South Newlandia miles ahead of the pack, the fact that we're in the middle of the pack is a great place to be."

The two wins from the Busoga Islands so far, in this tournament, have been impressive efforts. On Matchday 2, at home, they faced off against the United States of Devonta- after having been shutout, 13-0, at home in Week 1, this was a golden opportunity to get their first win of the tournament. And with Devonta getting beaten pretty good by Banija the week prior, the Busogans knew that they were vulnerable. But it wasn't going to be a high-flying effort. Kohan Ersoy may be a talented QB, but the rest of this offense is severely lacking around him. If the Busogans were going to win this one, it was going to be on the backs of their defense- and on this day, it was the defense whom they would ride towards a victory.

While Ersoy couldn't deliver the first TD of the cycle of the Busogans, it was four strong drives, that led to four field goals for the Busogans- which was enough to triumph over Devonta. The defense and special teams had really come to play- Devonta did score a TD, but the PAT was blocked. For the Busogans, the strategy was simple- get off to a lead early, and try to strangle the life out of their opponents. They did exactly that, as they were able to get to a 9-0 at halftime, and 12-0 at the end of three quarters. "Look, to get our first win of the tournament, our first win ever in this tournament- it's a big deal for the Busoga Islands." The head coach told reporters. "A good performance- we need to continue to build on this."

in Week 3, they went to Chromatika, and it went about as everyone expected- down 35-0 at halftime, the Chromatiks dropped 50+ on them in a blowout loss. After three weeks, the Busogan offense had not breached even 20 points. But after that, it was Kohan Ersoy who would deliver the Busogan offense. Facing off against Darmen in Week 4, at home, the Busogans were ready- and the offense exploded. 52 points, seven touchdowns- everything went perfectly in a 52-3 blowout win. Who didn't ball out? Kohan Ersoy had a particularly strong performance- 21/24, 318 yards, 4 TDs, no turnovers. The Busogans even had 200+ rushing yards as a team, as they had three different players who had at least 60 rushing yards- the top two RBs, plus Ersoy himself. A perfectly dominating performance. Defense, offense, special teams- unfortunately to not get a shutout.

But in Week 5, while the offense could keep it going, the defense could not keep up. Katezburg, who started 0-4, finally got things going for themselves, by getting 47 points against the Busogans, in a wild, wild 47-31 loss for the Busogans. "A frustrating one, for sure." Kohan Ersoy told reporters. "But that's simply how things go in this competition. It's early on, we're in the middle of the pack- this team is getting better as the tournament goes on, and that's where we want to be."

The biggest games are yet to be played. The Busoga Islands travel to Banija on Matchday 7- and that matchup in Jinja City is going to be massive. The smack talk is already beginning- the Banijans, in particular, talking about how they'll 'smoke the Busogans'. "Look, let me say this." Ersoy said to reporters. "If they think they're just going to get a blowout win, let me let them know- I went 8-2 against the Banijan schools in college, and we're gonna shock the world in Jinja City. Tell them to get ready- those Eagles wings are going to be torn apart in Jinja City."

[Valanora]

Except from the 2nd of Rhavathan, 20,103 or roughly four months ago

Valanora Times
Second Helpings

While for those in Raynor City or Mar Sara, their attention for gridiron might currently be dominating by their competing universities of Raynor University and Mar Sara Tech in the NSCF, both teams looking quite capable of making deep playoff runs, the rest of the enjoyers of the sport across the nation have been able to be witness to the second season of the Vanorian Gridirion League. The VGL played its first season a year ago and in the title game of that inaugural edition Coral Bay Thunderhawks ran riot over Stormguard Stormbreakers twenty-nine to three. It was a bit of an anticlimactic occasion for the championship game of the first season to be such a one sided affair but it had brought to bare the promise for some years now that there was a place for professional gridiron inside the Empire. Sixteen teams split across two conferences, each conference playing a double round robin schedule, and the winner of each conference meeting in a championship game to determine who was the champions of the sport inside the Empire. It was a bit of a break from traditional Vanorian leagues but the nature of the sport deemed an unique approach to the league structure.

Most of the league was comprised of former graduates from the two aforementioned schools, who have over two decades of experience in the sport with their participation in the NSCF, as well as some of the graduates from abroad who had not found homes in Banija, Ranoria, Quebec, or other places with already more established professional leagues. Many of the players for the national team, the Sabres, who were without a team and had been maintaining their fitness by playing semi-professionally immediately took the offer from one of the various teams around the league to be able to play professionally here at home. While the league and her teams were far from the quality of their peers, especially their closest peer in Banija who operated a team of their league in Mar Sara, it was step to getting that level of play higher. While most experts gave a five to ten year time frame to be able to lift the VGL to be competitive with their peers, the teams were undeterred especially with seeing the success of the first season and with many of the games being sell outs. By any measure, the first season showed that there was enough of an appetite within the Empire for the game that it could seriously grow.

The off-season proved that as the money from sponsorships and broadcasts agreements were made and the team's budgets from the first season into the second nearly doubled, with the league deciding to institute of soft salary cap of seventy-five million silver coins per team, with a luxury tax imposed on any teams who went above it. Wether or not the salary cap stays in place as the league finds its footing is unknown, but it did provide a baseline for the team's to know exactly how much they were expected or allowed to spend to be able to field a competitive team. This of course benefits team's located in richer parts of the Empire, notably from the capital itself and the Raynor City Starfire were not happy with their six win season in the opening year and decided to aim big. They made the signing of the off-season that signaled the intent of the team but also of the league as a whole to shoot your shot as you never know when it might land, as they were able to sign hometown hero Imran Håland to the team, the starting running back of the NSCF champion Rockets to come be their number one running back.

With all the teams getting their rosters squared away, the opening day kicked off a second season for the league and there was plenty of intrigue around the league as the weeks began to go on by. Last season's champions Coral Bay were having some struggles while the runners up in Stormguard were blitzing through the Heartlands Conference, looking to have taken that defeat in the title game to fill their rage to get back to it, though Travesian and Turbani were not letting them do it as easy as they would have liked. However as the regular season came to a close it would be the Stormbreakers at the top of the conference, one win ahead of those two trailing teams and two ahead of the Starfire. In his first season in the league Imran Håland was fifth in the league in rushing with 824 yards but had another 641 yards receiving, showing off dual threat capabilities that made him a star in college. If the Starfire can surround him with talent, they could contend for the Heartlands in another year of so, but for now the Stormguard Stormbreakers were on their way to the second title game and looking to do one better than last season.

Meeting them in the title game will be the Enyenora Rogues, who were just barely edged out of contending for the first title game by Coral Bay and this season finished three games ahead of their burgeoning rivals in the conference with only two losses in the entire season. The two teams traveled to the Lathalein Celestial Stadium in Mar Sara, home to the Raiders of Mar Sara Tech as well as the home stadium of the national team, to play for the crown. It was an ugly affair on an ugly day, as a late fall shower and temperatures around forty-two degrees made it a game that was not going to be conducisve to passing. The second best defense in the league from the Rogues smothered the offense from the Stormbreakers, despite Stormguard having had the third best offense in the league and ultimately the Stormbreakers would fall victim to a second straight defeat in the Championship game, nineteen to six. It was a second consecutive title game that was a bit of an anti-climatic ending to the season but it has showcased that the league is here to stay and as fine a place as any for any players Vanorian or foreign to make their mark at.

Vanorian Gridiron League

P Heartlands Conference        Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Stormguard Stormbreakers      14   11   3   420  236 +184
2 Turbani Orange Knights        14   10   4   340  177 +163
3 Travesian Mustangs            14   10   4   385  348  +37
4 Raynor City Starfire          14    9   5   381  338  +43
5 Longview Avalanche            14    5   9   319  413  −94
6 Sharala Icestorm              14    5   9   342  380  −38
7 Monaven Rapids                14    4  10   196  302 −106
8 Mar Sara Wildcats             14    2  12   204  393 −189

P Celestial Conference         Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Enyenora Rogues               14   12   2   496  201 +295
2 Coral Bay Thunderhawks        14    9   5   397  279 +118
3 Kenmore Hills Drakes          14    8   6   426  377  +49
4 Caddo Warriors                14    8   6   400  360  +40
5 Caethserir Waveriders         14    7   7   428  331  +97
6 Morren Shaeras Fury           14    6   8   295  491 −196
7 Bexar Typhoon                 14    3  11   260  454 −194
8 Vaharia Direwolves            14    3  11   219  428 −209

Championship Game
Lathalein Celestial Stadium, Mar Sara
Stormguard Stormbreakers 6–19 Enyenora Rogues

[Pafi]

Pafi Sports Network World Bowl Coverage
Veteran King Takes Field as New Starting QB After Pan Proves Not Ready Yet, Offense Instantly Sparked

Okay this one's right in the headline honestly. The young Quincey Pan lost his job as Pafi's national starter following his obvious struggles in the first three games of the country's debut World Bowl, and league veteran Sigfrido King has been named the team's starter going forward, in hopes Pan will develop a bit more in the event a domestic league gets off the ground before next year's championship. This decision paid off immediately, as the next game was Pafi's strongest thus far, a 34-10 victory over Vaishnavaria. This was Pafi's most complete effort yet, holding the Tigers to 10 points with their defense continuing to prove themselves as... at least somewhat competent. The real highlight was King's ability to stay calm in the pocket, even as the team's weak O-line collapsed at times.

"Pan's major issue is one seen in a lot of younger quarterbacks" Offensive Coordinator Annibale Ette told us, "Inexperienced guys tend to panic when their line breaks down and try to force bad plays. He (Pan) scrambles out there every time the line gives in, and it's led to some boneheaded picks being thrown. Quebec and Shingoryeo's second half against us is the prime example there. Kid was lost. Older guys like King know what to do in these situations better, and it shows in that this is the first time we've broken 20 points this toruney, let alone 30."

The offense continued to hold strong against the defending champions the following matchday, with the Blue and Golds visiting Pafi's Otterdome. Pafi piut up their second 34 point performance in a row... only for the script to be flipped and the Pafian defense became a liability for the first time this season. Cardenao pinned a staggering 54 points on Pafi that night, raising questions about if the national team's defense was actually as good as it had seemed up to now. The Blue and Golds' receivers had a field day, Bobby Dials throwing six touchdown passes on the day, and kicker Badrick Cedella adding four field goals, as even when Pafi's defense made a stop it was often within chip shot range anyway.

Coverages were blown left and right by the pass defense this game, but given the pass is where Cardenao's absurd offense gets much of its milage, it's a real credit to their talent. Even if Pafi has proven themselves little more than "maybe possibly above average I guess?" in that regard.

We don't expect many changes to the roster going into the next two matches, this time starting with a trip to fellow unranked nation in our group Tumbra, and then hosting the Tapirs at home, finishing the first round robin among the group. Can they at least maintain their winning record? Nova Calania may prove challenging and are the closest to the Pafians in the standings, but Tumbra sit at 1-4. Pafi have been rather suspect throughout this tournament though, but all they need to come out of the first half above .500 is to win one of these two games at least. I just hope they have it in them.

[Chromatika]

Five Things the Iron Legion Must Fix to Get Back on Track

A 2-3 record in five games is simply unacceptable for Chromatika. The fact that they can only improve to 4-3 by halfway heading into a fateful clash against South Newlandia and Banija is even worse. Sure, the Iron Legion could still finish as good as 11-3, but the likelihood of that happening seems very small right now. So, what's been going wrong? How do they fix this before it gets out of hand? Here are five things that Chromatika has to fix if they are to get back on track and hopefully win that elusive first World Bowl Title:

1. Gwenderyn, Gwenderyn, Gwenderyn.

Save for the game against the Busoga Islands, Chromatika's Quarterback has been struggling - something that nobody saw coming. There's been talk that Anne-Maurice Vivayavich should be the starter - and the fact that such talk exists at all is a problem. Gwenderyn is simply the best Quarterback in Chromatik history, but there is no denying her struggles. She's putting up the numbers, but in clutch situations where she's expected to showcase her prowess, she's had some bad decisions. If it wasn't for Lisa Bonsoon picking off an errant pass in the last game, Chromatika could've easily even lost to Crpostran - mostly due to Gwenderyn's mistakes, as she had a fumble and an interception on the day. She has shown the capacity to turn things around on a regular basis, so she will still command the respect that she deserves, but time is running out for Sarai to turn the ship around.

2. The Protection.

Chromatika has conceded twenty-three sacks in five games so far - and that includes a game against the Busoga Islands where they didn't register a single sack. In the three losses, Gwenderyn has been hit twenty times. No Quarterback in the multiverse can play up to their potential when they're being hit so many times in a game. The Guard-Center combination of Lockhart and Kingston has been the biggest issue, letting Defensive Tackles get to Gwenderyn up the middle. Misha Florentine has stated that Chromatika may rotate offensive linemen throughout the game to compensate; even if so, Gwenderyn needs to have her head on a swivel as the line continues to sort out their issues.

3. Halftime Adjustments.

As evidenced by the match against Banija, Chromatika has been outscored 63-41 after halftime, as compared to 81-37 in the first half. It's not like Curentino, Harrowitz, and Florentine to get outcoached so thoroughly; whether it be execution, creativity, or discipline, the Iron Legion are falling flat on their face in the Third Quarter and not being able to make up the deficit in the final stanza. For a team that prided themselves on having a mental edge and the ability to adjust on the fly, this won't do. As teams figure this out about Chromatika, it will only lead more and more to teams playing toward it. They need to fix this, and do so fast.

4. Discipline Issues.

For a nation that prides itself in playing clean, the Iron Legion has been doing far less than that. Averaging eight penalties a game - three more than all prior tournaments - Chromatika has struggled in key situations to stay in the good graces of referees. Having had six touchdowns called back, while letting the opposition have three more tries at goal - it's been very uncharacteristic for a Chromatik squad. The players have shown their frustration on the sidelines as well - and this has further divided the team apart from each other, stopping them from communicating to fix the issues. Getting back to the Chromatik way of play isn't just needed to win games - it's needed to return to playing like Chromatika should.

5. Balance.

Yes, Gwenderyn is one of the best Quarterbacks in the multiverse, but when she's struggling, it would behoove the Iron Legion to run the ball more. Rhodes is a bruiser, and Merik is there to shoulder the load; Hastroff is very fast off the edge, and even Upshaw could be used in short yardage situations. Perhaps the way that you help Gwenderyn settle in is to run the ball more - which can set up the play-action needed to stretch the field. Scoring 24 points a game won't do it for the Iron Legion, and this could be a way to work that out.

[South Newlandia]

Wet Eagles lose sloppy game to muddy Elephants

Footage of South Newlandia scoring touchdowns, I think

For reasons historians and sports experts will continue to debate for decades, South Newlandia are 5-0. In an almost-sold-out Jungledrom, the Pachyderms took down the Serpent Eagles in a torrential downpour, led by Thomas Fantikos, who managed to amass 150 yards on the ground, and a stifling defense that forced four takeaways and took two of them to the endzone.

Similar to the earlier game against Chromatika, this was a game of reunions – and one very special one featured the two running backs, Thomas Fantikos and Zamandi Ayana. A decade ago, they were ‘Thunder and Lightning’ in the same backfield, in the very same stadium they were now returning to. Both of them would set the tone on their old stomping ground, with the former Egrets combining for more than 350 yards between receiving and rushing. Predictably, both were heavily featured in the gameplan, as trying any kind of long pass in the Ratzupalfu weather seemed almost suicidal.

“Odika takes the snap, drops back, looking to give Banija the lead after the two teams traded short field goals. Looking, throws deep to the left to Yafet, and its picked! Underthrown by Odika and Bruno Clarke picks the ball off. Still on his feet, has some blockers, has a lane, across midfield and there’s only green grass – well, brown mud – in front of him! Dives into the endzone, touchdown Elephants – incredible!”

“Elephants are driving here, looking to extend their 10-3 lead. Yadav, that’s an excellent play by the young QB, handing the ball off to Fantikos. Cuts outside, has a block, shakes loose, and he will not be stopped! Touchdown Elephants, again!”

“It’s late in the second quarter now and Banija are desperately trying to get back into this game, trailing 3-17. They’re at their own 37 here, 2nd&4. Odika, hands the ball off to Okombo – ball is loose! A massive pile of muddy bodies, both teams claim they have it. They’re trying to excavate the football from under the pile – looks like veteran Keyaan Brandt has the ball at the very bottom – he looks like a 35-year-old man who just had approximately one ton of footballers jump on top of him. Fortunately for him, he’ll get to catch his breath as the Pachyderms take the field again”

“Yadav, at the three-yard-line now. Schlachter in motion, takes the handoff, toss to Barbosa, she races to the outside, and she’s going to get in there! I don’t know what is happening here, but somehow, some way, the Elephants are up by 20 against the Serpent Eagles?!? A well-executed reverse gets them into the endzone again”

“Banija have the ball first in the second half, with South Newlandia leading 27-3. Who has ever heard of a team blowing a massive lead like that? Doesn’t seem possible. But Odika will try to claw the Serpent Eagles back in this – you can never quite count Banija out. Zamandi Ayana on the first play, ploughs through the middle, slips through everyone, he’s going to have a breakaway touchdown! Incredible, a 70-yard score to immediately bring Banija back closer – they’ll line up for 2 in order to cut the deficit to two scores”

“Yadav in the pocket, looking, still looking, and sacked! Absolutely obliterated by Sizo Ashenafi, and the ball is loose! Recovered by the Elephants, it seems, lucky break for the Pachyderms, but they’ll punt from deep in their own territory here”

“Odika throws, wide open Essa Kayode! Will have an easy touchdown, Ellie defense completely lost the Banijan receiver here, and all of a sudden, its only 27 to 17 – a two-point conversion could make this a one-score game!”

“About four minutes left in the game as the Elephants still lead by 8, looking for the knockout punch. Yadav, after four consecutive handoffs to Fantikos, will stand in the pocket, tries to find – someone, probably, the ball hits the ground with no pachyderm anywhere close. That’ll be a punt, and Odika will have a chance to lead a drive for an improbable comeback to tie it”

“One more play before the two-minute warning now, Banija have advanced to around midfield, looking to tie the game. Odika, looking, fires, finds Zamandi Ayana, who’s having an amazing game. Cuts left, but brought down at – ball is loose! Elephants have it, Sörens has the football and some space, no one’s gonna catch her, Alani Sörens houses the fumble by Zamandi Ayana, and that should do it!”

[Banija]

Short Preview- Upcoming GFLB Season (Part 2)

GFLB Rosters

A couple of OOC notes on the rosters:
#1 (For everyone): If you have players in my league, the aging is almost certainly disastrous. For that, I apologize. They are unlikley to match WB ages- so don't feel as if you have to match the ages I have.
#2 (For everyone): Sorry the format isn't posted on the boards, It is simply much easier to maintain via Google Sheets.
#3 (for everyone): I'm not above making mistakes. If there is one made, DM me on Discord or TG me and I will correct them.

All-Banija Sports Magazine Division Predictions (Continued)
(D) = Division champ
(X) = Wild Card

West Division
1. Mar Sara Night Elves(D)
2. Sisonke Leopards(X)
3. Dukuma Dragons(X)
4. Busembe Timberwolves

Blurb: Another division that can only be described as one thing- stacked. With Wagner-Young leading the way for the Leopards, and Craig Juniper balling out for a Mar Sara Night Elves team that was dangerous all season long last year, there's plenty of competition in this division for teams who think they can win a title. There's not a lot to choose between the two teams- the Leopards have, top to bottom, one of the best rosters in the entire GFLB. Wagner-Young at QB, you've got Duhaga in the backfield, you've got Essa Kayode as the WR1... It's one hell of a three-headed monster on offense. They've got balance- that was the key to success when Wagner-Young and Apollo Esther went to a pair of title games in college, and they've got the roster for that now.

Wagner-Young's gotta come out and get his title this year, right? The only thing about the Leopards- is that they stayed stagnant this offseason. They didn't do a ton to try and improve. They've got a great roster, yes, but could they get complacent? The Night Elves, with relocation rumors swirling around them, got aggressive, especially to improve their defense. They traded up in the draft to grab Zelotes Okoth, who has all the tools to be an elite rusher off the EDGE for years to come. With Tembo entering his second year as the CB1, he might legitimately be the top CB in the entire league- and pairing a stud CB, with a potential stud EDGE rusher, both under 25? That team is built for both now and the future.

The real Q is, how can Gabriel Yafet hold up? He's 34, and 34 year old WRs aren't generally known for balling out- but we'll see if he can continue to defy father time.

As for another interesting team in here, we'll talk about the Dukuma Dragons. They don't have a stud QB- Dexter Jacobson is solid, a pretty good QB, but at this point he is what he is. He's not on the Krauts, and now getting past age 30, it's unlikely he'll ever get there. He's got that motivation. ANd the Dragons- once again, an aggressive GM. Trading up to get two first round picks- they've grabbed a NSCF champion WR1, out of Mar Sara Tech, Samo Sarr. They also drafted Bayindir Ecevit in the first round as well. This is a team with difference makers- and while they might be overshadowed in the divison, Busoga's only team in the league is certainly looking to make a run.

If you're a Timberwolves fan? Well, better luck next year...

South Division
1. Mukeruzi Hyenas(D)
2. Hoima Zebra(X)
3. Busukuma Athletic Club
4. Busukuma Suns

Blurb: The Hoima Zebra were most famous this offseason for making a large public push for Jack Hoy- of course, driven by the Commissioner, but this was expected by experts as the team 'most likely' to grab Jack Hoy. They, of course, failed- and with a major part of their offseason gone, they couldn't really sign a ton of free agents to fill that void. Therefore, they will enter the season with the most cap space out of any team in the GFLB- not bad, of course, but not where you want to be when A-MV's got your title window cracked open. They didn't completely ignore the HB position, signing Jebel Marenah out of free agency, but he's on a one season contract- the Zebra are expected to make another push at Jack Hoy in the near future.

We think this year, that the Hyenas will win this division. A team like the Dragons- a QB from a football powerhouse nation, but who really isn't on the NT radar. Emilee Johansson is one of those QBs who are good, but not great. But the Hyenas have given her interesting tools. They've given her potentially the best WR in the game- Kasozi Batte, who's got size, and literal track star speed- with the attitude of a preacher. Another year together, and Batte is prepping to tear the league apart. The challenge, of course, is weapons around him- he's attracting double teams all game long. They drafted a new TE to put alongside Batte. It's a contract year for the superstar WR- if the Hyenas can't do anything, will Batte force his way out into free agency?

If you are a fan of a team in the capitol... We are sorry.

Central Division
1. Igulu Bush Elephants(D)
2. Lwanga Rhinos(X)
3. Umbazi Metropolitan SC(X)
4. Isipongo Wild Boars

Blurb: The Igulu Bush Elephants are coached by Richard Steinheil- and the old Ranorian has this team in full form. If you asked the question of 'what would happen if you had a RFL team, and you put them in the GFLB, what would happen', the Bush Elephants are the answer to your question.

This is a team built around defense. They've got most of their starting defense in the World Bowl, and are out here ready to kick ass. Last season, however, they leaned a little too much on the defense- the offense was spectacularly poor, and in this league, you need at least some sort of an offense with a pulse. They went 8-9, and didn't even make the playoffs. With Steinheil over age 70, and general knowledge on the championship windows of defensive minded teams, they went out this offseason to improve their offense- go from maybe the least talented in the league, to at least a decent one. They grabbed a QB in free agency, Nantambu. Not a world beater, but certainly an upgrade.

They have a good HB, with Darrell Jackson. But they decided to trade up in the draft, and grab a WR- Hugo-Wojciech Son-Saka, out of Bonneville State in Quebec. Recognize that last name? His older brother, Layvin Son-Saka, plays soccer in Quebec for St. John's Arsenal- and is the captain for the Banijan NT in the same sport. Son-Saka is a perfect speciman. 4.3 40. His senior year in Quebec, had a ridiculous 2,000+ yards and 21 touchdowns. Won the Quebecois equivalent of the NSCF MOP award. Can he elevate the offense enough to get the Bush Elephants into the playoffs- and have them make a run when there?

Next, the Lwanga Rhinos. With Ebou Hairte, they were always title contenders. But it's a post-Hairte era- and with the Loyola alumnus gone, retired and done, they've got a rookie QB. The questions are entirely on the rookie, as the rest of the team is still Simba Bowl ready. Rachel Emerson at WR1. Alice Conti is the WR2. Matthias Katarina, from Mar Sara Tech, was also drafted by the Rhinos this year. They've got elite guys at all three levels on defense, and studs on offense as well. But, they were too good last season to trade up for a stud prospect- so they've got Faraba Savaneh, as their QB. Can they roll with Savaneh? A 2nd round pick, gonna be the starter- we'll see how high-powered of an offense they can have with what will likely be a liability at QB.

Umbazi, and Isipongo behind them. Not much to say about either side- both fundamentally sound, but neither has the offensive firepower to probably really make a Simba Bowl run.

East Division
1. Duntho Oilers(D)
2. Bunyoro RSC(X)
3. St. Jakob Honey Badgers(X)
4. Bwubanza Ostriches


The Duntho Oilers- once again, favorites to win this division. They were favored last year- and they finished 8-9. They've got an interesting situation. Baayo Sabadaey was going to retire, but changed his mind at the last minute, to come back for one more season. Do they actually have the firepower for success? They're pretty good- good enough to win the division. Good enough to do anything beyond that? Well.... We aren't sure.

The Ostriches are finally moving on from the chaotic Diamond Rhine era. They gave him the biggest contract in Banijan sports history, in terms of both total money and average annual value, but of course... It bombed out. He was one of the worst QBs in the league in year 1, as he was mostly engaged in legal battles over his pretty damn dangerous pet, and his play never really recovered on the field. Bwubanza fans are not sorry to see the back of him- on the off chance that the Krauts play a game in Bwubanza this cycle, they will boo the hell out of him. Kohan Ersoy will step into the QB1 role. It's an interesting choice- draft the Busogan, who's had stunning success in college, and see what he can do in the league.

There's not a lot of talent around him- so, we should probably expect the Ostriches to not do much. But what does that mean for everyone else?

Everyone's favorite Teus squad, the Honey Badgers, should be in best position to take advantage. They've got just enough on defense to get it done.

And beyond that? Bunyoro RSC should be able to as well. THat defense is pretty underrated, and if they can stay healthy, they can definitely post a top 5 unit on that side of the football.

Foreign Draft Picks
QB Odin Sørbø, age 21, 6'0", 184 lbs, SR - Jinja City Springboks
TE Matthias Katarina, age 21, 6'4", 240 lbs, SR - Lwanga Rhinos
WR Samo Sarr, age 21, 6'4", 211 lbs, SR - Dukuma Dragons
WR Mille Ueland, age 21, 5'8", 165 lbs, SR (F) - Hoima Zebra
RT Mio Lunde, age 21, SR - Duntho Oilers
MLB Zesiro Wattiti, age 21, 6'4", 235 lbs, SR - Aissa Crocodiles
FS Sigrid Bøe, age 21, 5'10", 160 lbs, SR (F) - Duntho Oilers

WR Hugo-Wojciech Son-Saka, 6'0, 201 lbs. - Igulu Bush Elephants
CB Manny Ugarte, 5'10, 196 lb - Jinja City Springboks

[Drawkland]

In honor of the 50th edition, I'm doing a "brief" history of the World Bowl. We'll be going era-by-era, and once this series concludes I'll be adding this information to the (currently bare bones) NSS Wiki article for the World Bowl. Enjoy, and if you have any input or feedback, let me know.

At this point, the "second" dynasty of Allamunnic States was set to begin. Whether or not the following stretch qualifies as a separate dynasty to the first is up to personal preference, but it was definitely a distinct run of dominance given how they were less than elite in the early 20's of the World Bowl. Still, they were undoubtedly the best World Bowl nation next to Dancougar ... but now it was time to challenge that notion.
3 titles - Dancougar, Allamunnic States
2 titles - Sarzonia, Delaclava, Qazox, Cassadaigua
1 title - Rennidan, Arroza, Fujisawan Territories, Tocrowkia, Bluth Corporation, F1 Insanity, Civil Citizenry, German Zerabithea

The Regulars Part 2, Plus Two Mini-Dynasties
After their first incredible dynasty, Allamunnic States were ready to truly return to the fold. Their four-cycle run in the late teens was undoubtedly the best in World Bowl history, but their work was not yet done. There was still an argument to be made that Dancougar was a more dominant team in their day. Most visibly, they were still tied on total title count.

World Bowl XXIII was an interesting one for a couple reasons. Firstly, it was the first World Bowl to fall short of 50 participating nations in ten cycles. Secondly, it was hosted by Estope, a nation whose national team had never been truly relevant in the World Bowl at the time. The stage was set with a rather simple 8 groups of 6 into Round of 16 format. Coming out the group stage, it didn't seem like the Allamunnic States rebound would be coming anytime soon. They went a mere 7-3 in the group stage, finishing behind 9-1 German Zerabithea. Other 9-1 teams included Cassadaigua, Taeshan, Saintland, Darmen, and Ko-oren. The Regulars ended up with the #9 seed and managed to beat Taeshan in the Round of 16, a nailbiting 20-19 that set the Regulars up against #1 seeded Cassadaigua. This is truly where the Regulars returned to the fold, outmuscling the Fillies and winning 16-12 to reach the semifinals once again. They'd be going against Ko-oren, a nation in the midst of their best cycle to date, their first real run. With both teams renowned for their powerful defense, it's no surprise that it ended 12-9. The experience of Allamunnic States really paid off and they won the field goal fest to reach their fifth final. In the other semifinal, Saintland authored a 22-point comeback to avoid being the third straight team upset by upstarts New North Aqumuland, eventually winning 30-29 to reach their first World Bowl championship game. This was the first time any team had a chance to win a fourth World Bowl title, and it would be the toughest final game yet for the Regulars. Allamunnic States held off a furious comeback by Saintland's QB King Petrus XX in the final minute, intercepting their hail mary try to preserve their 22-19 lead. One snap later, the Allamunnic States were the undisputed kings of the World Bowl with their fourth title.

World Bowl XXIV saw a return to a 64-entrant tournament. It was also the second World Bowl to be co-hosted (if you count Saintland/Free Republics), featuring Vettrera and the Royal Kingdom of Quebec as the hosting duo. 8 groups of 8 would be whittled down to a Round of 16. With just a single round-robin, the margin for error was going to be much lower. Ko-oren continued their rise to relevance with the only 7-0 group stage on the Quebecois side of the tournament. Meanwhile, each group on the Vettreran side had an undefeated champion, those being Saintland, Equestrian States, German Zerabithea, and West Guiana. The first round of the playoffs was peculiarly low-scoring, with all but one game featuring 22 or fewer total points scored. Teams scored an average of 7.28 points in this first round, with the exception of the West Guiana vs Royal Kingdom of Quebec match, which finished with a mind-boggling 41-37 scoreline in West Guiana's favor. The defensive battles continued for some of the quarterfinals, most notably the game between Ko-oren and Allamunnic States. This was the fourth straight cycle that Dragonflies and Regulars faced off, and this time, Ko-oren finally got the better of the Allamunnae. The 10-7 win brought Ko-oren to the semifinals. They'd play against Gregoryisgodistan in their breakout cycle, fresh off a 7-0 win against Karditan that was scoreless until very late in the fourth quarter. On the other end, Saintland faced off against Equestrian States, winning in dominant shutout fashion, 23-0. Despite playing hard defense all playoffs, the Ko-oren vs Gregoryisgodistan game ended up 21-14 in favor of the Dragonflies, setting them up for the championship against Saintland. This time, the Sanctii would not be denied, as they routed Ko-oren 24-6 to capture their signature title.

The previous few World Bowls with 60 participants had consistently similar formats for their group stages. Host nation Equestrian States decided to go in a different direction for World Bowl XXV's group stage. Instead of a single group of 6 stage, WB XXV's participants were drawn into 15 groups of 4, played a double round robin, then were redrawn into 15 new groups of 4, using the first stage's placements for pots rather than the tournament rankings. The overall record after 12 games would be used for playoff seeding. With smaller groups and shorter stages, a lot more teams went undefeated in their groups. Over half the groups had their top-placing team 6-0 at the end of the first stage, and there was a fair amount of difference between the normal ranking pots and the pots that ended up being used for the second stage draw. Most of the undefeated teams lost with one matchday left in the second stage, leaving only Equestrian States standing at 12-0. There were 7 teams that ended with just one loss, some you'd expect like Allamunnic States, Saintland, and Ko-oren. Others, like Cosumar, Taeshan, and Karditan, were a little more surprising around this time. After a few preliminary playoff rounds to sort out the 9-3 playoff qualifiers, the Round of 16 was underway. Only Karditan and Ko-oren were upset in the first round, leading to a mostly-chalk quarterfinal slate. Equestrian States and Taeshan won on one side of the quarterfinals, while Saintland and Allamunnic States won on the other end to set up a WB XXIII championship rematch in the semifinals. Even with Saintland being a potential budding dynasty, they still couldn't overcome the Regulars, losing 10-0 in the semifinal while the hosts beat Taeshan 14-3 in the other semi. At this point the Regulars were recognized as perhaps the greatest nation in World Bowl history, but this sixth championship game appearance and chance for a fifth title would really put them over the top. On the other side, Equestrian States were the sixth host nation to reach the championship (Delaclava in XI and XV, Bluth Corporation in XIII, Sarzonia in XIV, Civil Citizenry in XVIII, Karditan in XX), and had a chance to be the fourth to actually win the title on home soil. Alas, the Regulars had fate on their side. The Fire Ponies held a 7-3 in the waning minutes of the game, but a freak forced fumble by Maarkus Staalhelm, followed by a desperate lateral to Belle Margusunn, ended in a fumble return touchdown that put the Regulars on top with insufficient time for Equestrian States to respond. The fifth title was in the books, as well as the lowest-scoring World Bowl championship game to that point (breaking World Bowl III's record of 19 total points).

It shouldn't be understated that this era wasn't just the period that Allamunnic States set a supposedly insurmountable record of greatness on World Bowl history. Two teams had very great generations in these years, and if it weren't for the Regulars, maybe these teams would be more historically lauded. One such team was Saintland, as we've mentioned. The other was Ko-oren, as you might have noticed. World Bowl XXVI was where the Dragonflies finally had their true breakout. 48 teams were drawn into 8 groups of 6 to play in the host nation of Electrum, the first-ever World Bowl debuting nation to host the tournament (besides Newmanistan in World Bowl I, though that was unavoidable). Two teams went undefeated in this 10-game group stage, Saintland and Taeshan, with Allamunnic States, Cosumar, Gregoryisgodistan, and Ko-oren all clocking in with 9-1 records. The first round of the playoffs had several surprises. Not only were Gregoryisgodistan and Taeshan upset by unranked Pasnelia and San Llera respectively, but top-seeded Saintland defeated Schottia 61-0, which may be the most lopsided playoff scoreline in World Bowl history. The usual suspects for this era, Allamunnic States, Ko-oren, and Saintland all survived the quarterfinals, and they were joined by San Llera who defeated Timbermunich 37-24 to keep their cinderella story alive. San Llera then ran into Ko-oren, and their improbable first-cycle run came to an end against the stifling Dragonfly defense, 10-0. In the other semifinal, Saintland finally beat Allamunnic States in a late playoff game, thanks to a holding penalty calling back a would-be go-ahead touchdown for the Regulars allowing the Sanctii to survive 21-17. This set up a WB XXIV championship rematch. One cycle after the record had been set for lowest-scoring championship game, Ko-oren and Saintland played an even more defensively charged match. This time, it was the Dragonflies coming out on top 7-6, their defense taking care of business in the best way to earn their first World Bowl title.

World Bowl XXVII, saw the participating nation count drop back down to 48. In their first World Bowl hosting foray, Cosumar oversaw the classic World Bowl arrangement: 8 groups of 6, 10 matchdays, Round of 16 playoffs. There was certainly the feeling of a new era on the horizon, as a majority of the nations that made it to the playoffs were either new or hadn't yet experienced real success in the tournament. This tournament tied WB XXIV for the most undefeated teams in the group stage, with five nations going 10-0 (Gregoryisgodistan, Schottia, Nassau-Hessen, Ko-oren, and Timbermunich). You'd think with the only other group winners being 8-2 HopNation, Royal Kingdom of Quebec, and Equestrian States, that this was a time of real turnover. Allamunnic States went 8-2, with both their losses coming against Timbermunich in the group stage, so many people were counting them out. Instead, the Regulars were one of the six nations that benefitted from first-round seeding upsets. That's right, in the Round of 16, only two of the higher-seeded teams survived, those being the highest ranked ones, Ko-oren and Gregoryisgodistan. Most of the teams that won were higher ranked teams that merely underperformed in the group stage, though. The semifinal field remaining after the quarterfinals featured Taeshan, Ko-oren, Saintland, and Allamunnic States, which wasn't too surprising for this era. Ko-oren's defense produced another masterclass in their semifinal against Taeshan, a 10-0 win to give the Dragonflies a chance to repeat as world champions. The other semifinal featured Allamunnic States almost blowing a 19-0 lead to Saintland before pulling back ahead in the 4th quarter to win 33-20. This set up the first meeting of Allamunnic States and Ko-oren in the championship game, despite many meetings in earlier playoff rounds to this point. The vaunted Dragonfly defense couldn't hang on this time around. Ko-oren even led 14-10 at halftime, but the Allamunnic defense stood strong, forcing a safety on the first Ko-orenite drive of the half. From then on, it was all Regulars. Allamunnic States retook the lead and never looked back, winning 26-14 to capture their record-extending 6th World Bowl title. This put the finishing touches on an era of dominance that will probably never be repeated.