Solitary Soccer League

by **Taxhavn** » Fri Aug 18, 2023 11:43 pm

SteuerLig SportsWire
By TAX Magazine

This is a closed sportswire - please TG the owner for queries or comments.

Contents
Your Tax-Free Guide To The Multiverse's Richest League

The SteuerLig is a four-tier professional football league on the Isle of Taxhavn, representing the top level of the crowded island's favourite sport, for which they are undeniably passionate. Is it a very good league, in the context of all the other leagues in the multiverse? Well, that's for you and the IFCF to decide.

Introduction - About The SteuerLig | A Brief History of Football on The Isle

Historical Data - SteuerLigen | TaxPokal & SuperPokal | Interregional football | Individual player data

The Club Directory - Football Geography | Senior Clubs | Blood, Sweat & Tiers

Season-by-Season:
Season-89 | Season-90 | Season-91 | Season-92
Season-93 | Season-94 | Season-95 | Season-96
Season-97 | Season-98 | Season-99 | Season-00
Season-01 (in pre-season training)

by **Taxhavn** » Fri Aug 18, 2023 11:44 pm

Welcome To Taxhavn
An Introduction The Isle

The Isle of Taxhavn (pop. 24 million and rising rapidly) is culturally and linguistically divided into three approximate zones, with some natural overlap. On the south side of the island is the city of St. Bernadine, a glass-and-steel high rise zone, the multiversally syphoning financial district, the gentrified commercial harbour quarter, and second home of the superrich for reasons that ought to be obvious from the name of the state. The language is predominantly Anglican-influenced. It is a very shiny, very expensive, and very busy modern city. Who knew there were so many trillionaires? The satellite districts include the very fancy Havn, on the waterside, and Städeli where the poorer billionaires and some millionaires (gods help them) have their residencies.

On the north side of the island is the Oranji-influenced city of Oranjestadt, a slightly less-shiny working-class zone with a large industrial and cargo container harbour, all serving the neighbouring manufacturing cities of Amstell and Maartenstadt. If all the residents of St. Bernadine are shareholders in the great corporations of the multiverse, and the city hosts it's great financial powerbases, then the residents of Oranjestadt and Amstell are likely their employees, and the corporations' grim manufacturies are mostly over the natural divide of Schilling Mountain down in the smog and concrete motorways of the northern valleys.

St. Bernadine and Oranjestadt: never the twain shall meet. Except around the western coast - in the residential districts of the Bezirks - where a gradation of class in the Nibelungen-speaking middle-class zones joins the corporate south to the sweatshop north. Here are some rare clean beaches, suburban paradises, affordable shopping malls, moderately pleasant apartments, nice parks and even some domestic gardens. It is the quiet(er) zone of the island. The middle-management zone.

by **Taxhavn** » Fri Aug 18, 2023 11:45 pm

Football In Taxhavn
The Briefest of Histories

Historically football on the isle can be divided into three eras - the early developmental phase of exhibition matches and various short-lived local competitions, particularly in the south where the oldest clubs, the three St. Bernadine teams, laid the foundation for everything to follow. Little is preserved in the record books of this time. The second phase is the organised regional leagues phase, based in St. Bernadine in the south and Oranjestadt in the north, as well as an organised WorksLigen for factory and corporation teams which can rightly claim to be the first all-island encompassing competition. The three-league system existed for nearly sixty years before the beginning of the third phase, with the foundation of the unifying SteuerLig in UICA'59.*

*With no agreed universal or multiversal calendar, and the Isle working on multiple calendars itself due to its various connections around the worlds, football uses the UICA calendar to keep track of historical data - though there has never been a time when the leagues entered the international club competitions. Further, to avoid confusion following the changeover to IFCF and restarting the count, UICA timekeeping is still applied with the new IFCF time appended.

Taxing Football
1/6 - Island Football

‘Oh look, another fading star or egomaniac who has fallen out with their club has taken the tax break,’ say the critics of the SteuerLig in Taxhavn, every other day. And it is true the league underwritten by a state underwritten by multiversal investment corporations underwritten by trillionaires has an unhealthily positive bank balance which it is willing to spend on its ‘tax-washing’ project. Because Taxhavn. Whatever that means (see episode two of Taxing Football).

But the SteuerLig can legitimately claim almost one hundred years of recorded back-history before joining the ranks of the IFCF, and nearly fifty years of unrecorded history before that. The island loves football, that is undeniable. Before Grupo Taxhavn became involved, with their cash mountain and their financial laundromat project to make the SteuerLig ‘international’, there had been a gradual development through three phases of soccer history to create a passion for the game and some half-decent clubs and players down the years.

The very first Athletic Club was founded in St. Bernadine city more than 170 years ago, a place where free marketeers, traders and executives of the Honourable North Pacific Company could socialise, drink coffee, sniff cocaine, indulge in board games and take part in this new thing called ‘athletics’ which was like board games, but where parks were the game boards and humans the actual game pieces. Out of that club emerged the rules of Association Football, Taxhavn-style, inspired by gentlemen’s sport elsewhere in the old North Pacific Empire. And from that club also came the ‘Triple-A’: the three founding father teams of Taxhavnite football: Athletic, Amateur and Accountants. For more than a century they ruled football both as the best teams, and as the official football association. This is considered the first phase of Taxhavnite football - informal arrangements, individual contests, passing knockout competitions that did not survive with any longevity or did not have the full participation of every club. Clubs that came and went. It was the wild west period of football on the island.

Almost one hundred years ago, the Triple-A founded the TaxLigen, a group of three leagues, all quite independent but overseen by the Triple-A. This was the second phase of football, and the leagues were based partly on geography, partly on social structures - so there was the Southern League, for the gentlemen teams of St. Bernadine city, include Athletic, Amateur and Accountants. In the north was the Oranjilig, for the working class clubs of the poorer manufacturing cities of Oranjestadt and Amsterlo; while a separate division was set up for the big company teams where sports and social clubs were becoming all the rage - the Worksligen. The Southern League was considered the superior of the three leagues, naturally, because it was contested by gentlemen and dominated by the Triple-A, with Athletic winning a still-standing record of 19 titles, while Accountants took 8 and Amateur 7. Only FC Städeli came close to challenging their supremacy, winning 6 titles over a 58-year period.

In the north, Tijhuis Archimedes and Kierhuizen Boys dominated in the early days, and then came the emergence of a mighty Orchideeën team in the 40s that won 9 titles in a row, another record that still stands, while in the Worksligen a team full of bank employees from the Septentrienne-Nationale Bank, or BSN, equalled Athletic’s 19 titles. These two great teams really drove the desire to unite the leagues, pitch the Triple-A against the best of the Oranjilig and the Workslig, and find out once and for all who was the best team in all Taxhavn. As the governing body, the Triple-A finally acceded, creating the SteuerLig, and at that time also passing responsibility for managing football over to an ‘independent’ body - the Taxhavn Football Association (recently rebranded as FA-Tax).

The third phase of football began with three different and unexpected teams emerging as the dominant force - the big Triple-A teams, the Oranji giants, even BSN were surprised to find themselves overtaken by modern clubs who adapted faster to the new environment. FC Städeli, Raven Thöni, and especially Standard Lily became the Big Three of the SteuerLig - Raven winning the first four titles while Standard have won ten in total including an impressive 5-in-a-row in the late 70s/early 80s. Raven have gone on to win four more while FC Städeli, the Frigates, have won six in less than half the time it took them to win six Southern League titles. In this phase of football history the unification of the leagues has worked to create a huge following for many of the big clubs, with large and well-equipped stadia, and advanced talent development programmes. But enough is never enough, as they say in banking. And that is when Grupo Taxhavn came into play.

Taxing Football
2/6 - Tax Washing: Grupo Taxhavn

It is true the league underwritten by a state underwritten by multiversal investment corporations underwritten by trillionaires has an unhealthily positive bank balance which it is willing to spend on its ‘tax-washing’ project. Because Taxhavn. Whatever that means.

And what does it mean?

In the past, there was the Honourable North Pacific Company. It was a commercial empire, with the emphasis on empire. It was the first of the ‘shadowy corporations’ that run everything in the background, something we are all familiar with today. But ‘The Company’ have been gone a long long time, disappearing into the depths of the Wide Enness Ocean, from whence they came, leaving behind a legacy of conquered nations and a playbook of how - and how not - to control a state through commodities and commodities alone. Oh, and guns and private armies and cash. A lot of cash.

Nowadays the armies aren’t so important, you just buy those off of corrupt governments; commodities aren’t so important as imagined commodities, you just make lists of things and put numbers next to them and maybe you don’t even bother to verify them in the real. Virtual commodities. Block chains and coinbits and cryptocurrencies and other imaginary artifices. The successors to ‘The Company’ were the virtuality-makers - Oroboros Cooperative, Stadlerbank, Banque Septentriennes-Nationale, and the Taxhavn Tourist Board.

Wait, what? The Taxhavn Tourist Board?

Indeed, yes. Oroboros, Stadler and Sept-Nat built a taxhaven in Rushmore, many years ago, and began to siphon imaginary cash from all around the multiverse into it, using software from the first true artificial intelligence in Enness - Sixteen Bits. Of course, the Taxhavnites got expelled from Rushmore in a zombie emergency - whatever that is - back when everyone cared about that sort of thing. Now the cash farm is running on an island just sidewise of the North Pacific, just up the bay from the Delte Valley and just over the bight from Wight. Everyone is welcome to siphon their own ill-gotten gains into the multiplication tanks where imaginary money grows and grows at a phenomenal rate. The Taxhavn Tourist Board was set up to encourage this. Oroboros Cooperative, Stadler, Septentriennes-Nationale, and the Tourist Board: the Taxhavn Group. Gruppe Taxhavn. Grupo Taxhavn. And all the other Gogol Translations. Their job is to find appealing ways to make sure the investors, and the cash, keep on coming, keep on breeding, keep on multiplying. In a way that is palatable to the sanctimonious. We call it tax-washing, and one way to do that is to spend lots and lots and lots - and lots - of money on football. Because in football, money goes through the rinser, and comes out the other side, nice and clean, in a bank somewhere in St. Bernadine city, Taxhavn.

And so, the international phase of the SteuerLig. Buy them, and they will come. Use Grupo Taxhavn money to do it.

Taxing Football
3/6 - The Pyramid Scheme

It is true the league underwritten by a state underwritten by multiversal investment corporations underwritten by trillionaires has an unhealthily positive bank balance which it is willing to spend on its ‘tax-washing’ project. Because Taxhavn. Whatever that means (see episode two of Taxing Football, above).

FA-Tax, the Taxhavnite football association, are reorganising every aspect of island football with the chequebook supplied by Grupo Taxhavn, a shady conglomeration of banks and - yes - the Taxhavn Tourist Board, to ensure the cash is spread around generously. But it wasn’t always the case.

The SteuerLig, created in 1959 to bring together the very best teams of the three geographic and culturally separate leagues that had existed on the isle since the turn of the century, was just the beginning. At the time of unification, there were three leagues of twenty to twenty-four professional teams under the purview of the FA, and no-one cared about the amateur game. Organic and haphazardly-organised local leagues came and went, knockout competitions likewise. Rules were variable but the quality invariably terrible. To create a premium product - the SteuerLig - FA-Tax plucked sixteen of the most promising, successful and wealthy applicants from the Southern League, OranjiLig and WorksLigen and formed a single division from which there was no automatic relegation/promotion. An application and election process to replace the bottom team of the SteueLig was only introduced three years later after endless complaining from excluded teams - and the first elections always found in favour of the team already in the league. It was only after ten years at the end of season ’69 when VF Merzberg had the dubious distinction of being the first team to be voted out of the league.

Through the Seventies the election process caused more complaints than anything else in football, and the FA caved in to pressure to form a second division of the SteuerLig, commencing in ’81, with automatic relegation/promotion to the top division guaranteed, and another sixteen teams being invited to apply. Election in and out of the second division remained the philosophy of the FA, but rather than solving the problem, the changes just made the clamour worse - not just from the regional professional league clubs still outside the SteuerLig, but below that, those amateur and semi-professional clubs left to fend for themselves. With the coming of Grupo Taxhavn money, the noise became unbearable: everyone wants a fair tilt at some of that cash, and why not?

Today there are 302 registered clubs in Taxhavn, from the super-rich Big Three to the likes of Den Vaag, FC Schéinpäerd and Mount Schilling Casuals at the very bottom of the pile, and FA-Tax has promised to give them all a meritorious route to the top - or the bottom, of course - and the opportunity to be great. With enough cash (that shouldn’t be a problem, even for the Casuals) and the right guidance, in theory anyone could climb the open pyramid to the top. It’s the market capitalist version of egalitarianism - no-one is equal, but with money and the right breaks, anyone could end up at the top of the pile.

Taxing Football
4/6 - Going Multiversal: The Fourth Age

The SteuerLig had reached a new level of support from the football-going public by the mid-eighties, there was a new second tier, Lig-2, and Lig-3 was definitely on the cards, although it would take a few more seasons to get it up and running. FA-Tax was looking rather pleased with itself, and Grupo Taxhavn cash was flowing nicely into their coffers. A new soccer order had formed with Raven Thöni, FC Städeli and especially Standard Lily becoming the ‘big three’ of the modern era, breaking the dominance of the Southern League Triple-A, the Accountants, Amateurs, and Athletic of St. Bernadine. This also broke their somewhat conservative influence over the game and allowed FA-Tax more independence to come up with new and interesting schemes to make more money, spend more money, wash more money - because Taxhavn.

There was at this time a rather flashy accountant running one of the big banks on the island, Banque Sept-Nat, owners of the island’s joint most successful club of all-time, BSN, who like the Triple-A had lost their grip a little after the coming of the SteuerLig. That accountant was Mert de Reckonaere, and Mert had a plan to get his team back in contention at the top of the league: the International Domestic Soccer official Transfer Window, operating out of Tikariot. Let’s get some foreign talent into the Sept-Nat Stadion, thought Mert. They wouldn’t want to come for the quality of the football, but my gosh, we could offer salaries they could only dream of back home in Bigtopia. You know - because Taxhavn. The only problem was that FA-Tax did not allow foreigners to play in the SteuerLig, other than those from the international cooperative of the Wide Enness Ocean - probably best summed up by their collective organisational name, the Wightling Commonwealth. Those chaps could come for free but in the SteuerLig your Bigtopians, Maxtopians, Vilitans and Crpostanis were not permitted to earn the Tax Shilling.

No problem, thought Mert. He joined the board of FA-Tax and changed the rules. Simple as that. He was after all head of the third biggest bank in the most infinitely hugest (by several factors) economy of the multiverse, a mostly unacknowledged little island where pretty much all of the illegal shilling (and most legal ones) of every nationstate was sent for a good scrub with tax-free launder-soap before being returned to, minus generous commissions, or stored on behalf of, for generous fees, its original owners. Mert de Reckonaere was most welcome at FA-Tax once he’d done his presentation to the clandestine board on how the Transfer Window offered huge potential for extra scrubbery.

The net result of which was quite the game-changer. The one thing that would give a half-decent footballer with just about half an ambition left in him some pause for thought, before leaping at the vast fortunes on offer in the SteuerLig, was whether or not they might still get to play in the Champions League. So FA-Tax decreed that, from the late eightees on, SteuerLig clubs could enter IFCF and FFI competitions. Players came flooding in from the sixteen corners of the multiverse, BSN became good again, the whole SteuerLig became much better, Standard Lily reached the Associations Trophy final and FC Städeli won two consecutive League of Victors titles. A cup competition, the TaxPokal, was set up just to get that extra place in the IFCF Cup Winners Cup, and then the SuperPokal just for some extra revenue - because Taxhavn. In a short period, the SteuerLig was changed forever: and Mert de Reckonaere left the bank to become League Commissioner. Didn’t it all work out nicely?

Taxing Football
5/6 - SoccerLand

Back before IAC-21, when the internationalism of the SteuerLig was beginning to gain momentum and the league was able to get some old vets and some young kids attracted to the huge earning potential of life in Taxhavn, the national team was established more to keep the local professionals quiet - worried that their places were at risk from the incomers, they were offered the chance to go play in the Indies. As we explored last time around, Taxhavn hosted the first ever indie final - a fact lost on most people even in Taxhavn - so it seemed like a nice way to ‘pay off’ the discontented pros.

And then, against all expectation, the Shillingmen (or the Bankers as they were then, pre- official rebrand), performed rather well. We almost dare not mention the thumping opening day victory over former champions and our present hosts Reçueçn and will skirt vaguely over that and all the way to the quarterfinal, where a heartbreakingly narrow defeat to the fancied Sudilia concluded a hugely popular campaign. FA-Tax suddenly got all excited by the potential of a national team. Roped in on a part time basis to help out, the league’s most admired head coach Bradley Kemerer-Lascelles (of Quebec and Shingoryo) excited them even further by suggesting a national centre of excellence could be established, with age group teams to compete in the under-18 and under-21 brackets, establishing a model for the progress of young players into a national set-up. More importantly, according to the accountants at FA-Tax, it would cost a fortune. That’s good money down the scrubber, and in Taxhavn, that’s music to an accountant’s ears. Because Taxhavn.

Many years before an eccentric billionaire, Hakon von Arnold, had purchased a small marshy bump of land in St. Bernadine harbour, had spent his fortune reclaiming a little bit of land around it, and began building his personal castle with a whole dedicated town of employees to work for him. The project was thirty five years in and only half completed when he died, an old and crazy lunatic with no heirs, and von Arnold Island sat abandoned for another twenty years. Only refugees and illegal immigrants coming in on boats from catastrophic termination events around the multiverse inhabited the concrete and rotting steel mess of a place. About a million of them, by the time FA-Tax sent its first team off to the Indies and BKL suggested they should find a place to raise some kids for the national team. With great fanfare, FA-Tax announced they had bought von Arnold island off the government for one whole Taxhavn shilling.

That was four years ago. Now, von Arnold - rechristened SoccerLand - is almost ready. The junior teams, including an under-15 team hastily assembled when the Sarzonian FA declared it was reanimating the long dead under-15 World Cup, will be moving in soon (they presently base themselves at the community pitches in Jason Park, in the north of St. Bernadine city). Private partnerships are also in place - a new club financed by some Bonesea pirates is also building a stadium on von Arnold Island, and Polarian national team defender Aslak Hrafninnsson, who plays in Taxhavn for Orchideeën, has established his School of Hard Kicks for the resident refugee kids (quite a lot of Vilitans, one imagines). And the hugely expensive training centre for the national teams - SoccerLand. Next step, apparently, is the national youth elite league. Just how expensive will that be to arrange? The accountants are rubbing their hands with glee.

Taxing Football
6/6 - The Superclub

In the beginning, there was the Triple-A. At the dawn of football on the island, 150 years ago, were the clubs St. Bernadine Athletic, St. Bernadine Accountants, and St. Bernadine Amateur. They practically invented football on Taxhavn.

(There are so many things not true about that previous statement. Firstly, there’s St. Bernadine Academical. The fourth of the Triple-A. Then there’s Five Star St. Bernadine. The, um, fifth. Not to mention St. Bernadine Astronomical. And St. Bernadine Apollo. St. Bernadine Arsenal. ASMV St. Bernadine. Oh, and Schwänenclub - perhaps the oldest club in St. Bernadine. So many other clubs! But they say the victors write the history, and as the three most successful of the old clubs, your St. Bernadines Athletic, Accountants and Amateur are officially the Triple-A. To be fair, they did run football too. Probably still do).

Anyway.

It’s fair to say that for the Triple-A, things went a little downhill after the formation of the SteuerLig back in the 50s. At that time those three clubs were kings of the old Southern League, and the Southern League was the top of the football pile. But when the Triple-A formed an FA to rule over all football, the first thing FA-Tax wanted to do was create a new pan-island league. It would give the three teams a chance to prove finally, undisputed, that they were better than the noisy neighbours up north - the likes of Orchideeën, Tijhuis Archimedes and Kierhuizen Boys of the OranjiLig. But it didn’t work out that way. Though still half decent, the Triple-A were only half decent. And frankly, getting worse. Not only had the northern clubs overtaken them, but a western club Raven Thöni was well on the way to overtaking them, and even some of their old southern colleagues were getting the best of them - Standard Lily and FC Städeli in particular. From the Triple-A’s perspective, the pan-island SteuerLig had only proven how mediocre they had become.

That’s when someone hit on the idea of the Triple-A forming a new club, pooling the considerable resources of each, and making one St. Bernadine club to rule them all. Taxhavn City, they called it. FA-Tax loved it for other reasons - maybe here was a project that would win things in the IFCF, it was so vast and wealthy. So far, at that point, Taxhavn clubs weren’t setting the world alight at interregional level. They weren’t generating the kind of turnovers, and losses, that everyone loves in a tax-washing principality like Taxhavn. Taxhavn City might get the SteuerLig to the pinnacle of international domestic soccer. FA-Tax could hardly greenlight the project fast enough. A few years of legal challenges were seen off with incredible legal expenses - brilliant! Last season, Taxhavn City was inaugurated straight into the top flight, while the three old masters of Taxhavn football - Athletic, Accountants and Amateur - disappeared to the lower reaches of the old Southern League, where their reserve teams continue to play. What did the fans think? Well, who cares. This is Taxhavn. Money, is all.

And how did City get on in their first ever season, with the combined might of the three teams that formed them? Well, in their first game, they lost 5-1 at Raven Thöni. In their second they lost 7-1 at Orchideeën and were firmly rooted to the bottom of the division. Everyone apart from FA-Tax were loving it. Instant cult status beckoned. They sacked their first ever manager, Adam Ackeret, after ruining his promising career inside half a season. Eventually they rallied to finish twelfth out of twenty under Nelis Fijnwever, before losing their entire coaching staff to the Taxhavn national team when Bradley Kemerer-Lascelles stepped down before IAC-23. Though not the epic disaster they initially promised to be, they fought for the type of disappointing mid-table obscurity they had inherited from their founding clubs. Business as usual. Hardly a superclub. FA-Tax, perplexed, is considering what to do next to bring glory to the league. Good luck with that. Because FA-Tax.

Taxing Football
7/6 - Franchise Football

SteuerLig commissioner Mert de Reckonaere happened to be on vacation at his rather spectacular hillside farm property overlooking the village of Oughna, on the edge of the Garga Marshes in the Delte Valley when his PA called from back home St. Bernadine city to advise him it was probably time to leave the valley for a while. The Rake Teinton Women’s Institute had taken control of all the valley institutions, Margaret Honeyshine - who lives in the house on Rake Corner where the chimney fire happened - had been put in place as de facto leader, and Moira Hough - tech-savvy Gen-90 silver surfer - seemed to be calling the shots from right next to Margaret’s desk in the Trapezoid Office at the Delte River Trust. Resistance to the anti-democracy coup d’etât was mobilising and the long forecast Second Uncivil War was about to begin. Widow Arrinburton, notorious bully and a general of the WI in charge of ‘Activities’ had declared the Delte football team, which had twice failed to emulate its success in World Cup ’95, a corruption of foreign and liberal interference, and had banned them from returning from Pasarga. Mert’s PA had sent a private jet to a private aerodrome that the WI probably didn’t know about yet, and also a helicopter to the farm to get them on a rendevous with the jet. It was time for an emergency polit-evac.

On the flight home Mert recognised an astounding opportunity, and by the time he had landed at St. Bernadine International, the Deltic World Cup team had been diverted from their somewhat aimless flight out of Pasarga - they were on their way to Taxhavn. By the time they touched down, Mert had cleared a way for this group of gifted refugees to form a club and become a team in the top flight of the SteuerLig. They would enter at the same time as his other pet project, Taxhavn City, and there would be a natural rivalry between two unstoppable sides. Did anyone protest? Well no, not really. After all, these poor guys were exiled now. And if their World Cup had ended miserably, they still had the cache of having won it once before. Plus, someone’s got to stop the hated Taxhavn City from sweeping all before them.

(As it happens, half the SteuerLig managed to stop Taxhavn City and they were a laughing stock from the final whistle of their first ever match - a 5-1 defeat at Raven Thöni. Deltic FC, on the other hand, won the SteuerLig title in style at their first attempt.)

Before either City or Deltic kicked a ball in anger, while the process to enroll them automatically into the top flight was just clearing the FA-Tax legal department, Mert was approached by a group of ‘investors’ and mad-crazy football fans out of Bonesea, fronted by three former players who had won an IAC by beating Schottia, had won a Cup of Harmony by beating Schottia, and had been runners-up in the World Cup final by losing to, um, Schottia. AP Kelly, Curan Paynter and Buddock Mawla, plus ‘investors’, wanted to build a club for the SteuerLig. They were keen to rent some land on von Arnold Island, where FA-Tax was building SoccerLand, to build a stadium there, and to literally buy a place in SteuerLig-1. The likes of Orchideeën, Raven, FC Städeli and Standard Lily all rolled their eyes - here we go again, they thought. Mert de Reckonaere pulled a serviette out of his pocket, got AP, Curan and Budd to sign it, and a deal was done - coming soon to the SteuerLig, a third franchise - Boldsea. The stadium on von Arnold Island is nearly done, and Boldsea will join the league the season after next.

But why stop there? Mert is looking for more angles and more franchise teams, with more money to spend and more losses to make. Because Taxhavn. Rumours of a Wightling team are beginning to look pretty accurate, and former Wight & Delte World Cup winning geriatric wizard Climo Coss is fronting that one. Polarian Aslak Hrafninnsson, who plays for Orchideeën and runs his School For Hard Kicks out of von Arnold Island, is wondering about a senior team for his waifs and strays, while political analysts are running the rule over unstable states and assessing political pressure-points for more potential refugee teams. Franchise football is here.

by **Taxhavn** » Fri Aug 18, 2023 11:46 pm

List Of Champions
For The Retentive List Collectors

With no agreed universal or multiversal calendar, and the Isle working on multiple calendars itself due to its various critical connections around the worlds, football uses the UICA calendar to keep track of historical data - though there has never been a time when the leagues entered the international club competitions until now. Further, to avoid confusion following the changeover to IFCF and restarting the count, UICA timekeeping is still applied with the new IFCF time appended in some records.

TaxLigen Era

Seas.	Southern League			OranjiLig			WorksLigen  
UICA-era
01	St. Bernadine Athletic		Tulip Maartenstad		BSN
02	St. Bernadine Amateur		Kierhuizen Boys*		BSN (2)
03	St. Bernadine Amateur (2)	Tijhuis Archimedes		BSN (3)
04	St. Bernadine Amateur (3)	Kierhuizen Boys (2)		BSN (4)
05	St. Bernadine Athletic (2)	Tijhuis Archimedes (2)		Stadler Works
06	St. Bernadine Athletic (3)	Tulip Maartenstad (2)		OSA
07	St. Bernadine Accountants	Axis Driessche			BSN (5)
08  	FC Städeli			Tulip Maartenstad (3)		BSN (6)
09	St. Bernadine Athletic (4)	De Tike FC			OSA (2)
10  	FC Städeli (2)			De Tike FC (2)			BSN (7)
11	St. Bernadine Amateur (4)	Orchideeën			Hauser & Kofel
12  	FC Städeli (3)			Achille Oranjestadt		Hauser & Kofel (2)
13	St. Bernadine Amateur (5)	Tijhuis Archimedes (3)		Stadler Works (2)
14	St. Bernadine Athletic (5)	Orchideeën (2)			OSA (3)
15	St. Bernadine Athletic (6)	Sparta (defunct)		OSA (4)
16	St. Bernadine Accountants (2)	Kierhuizen Boys (3)		BSN (8)
17	Raven Thöni			Sparta (2) (defunct)		BSN (9)	
18	St. Bernadine Athletic (7)	Tijhuis Archimedes (4)		MAG
19	St. Bernadine Athletic (8)	Tijhuis Archimedes (5)		BSN (10)
20	St. Bernadine Athletic (9)	Tijhuis Archimedes (6)		Stadler Works (3)
21	Standard Lily			Achille Oranjestadt (2)		BSN (11)
22	Schwänenclub			De Tike FC (3)			BSN (12)
23	St. Bernadine Accountants (3)	Kierhuizen Boys (4)		BSN (13)
24	St. Bernadine Athletic (10)	Axis Driessche (2)		BSN (14)
25	St. Bernadine Amateur (6)	Tijhuis Archimedes (7)		BSN (15)
26	St. Bernadine Athletic (11)	Sparta (3) (defunct)		McCunnald
27	Immenmold			Orchideeën (3)			Beath SSC
28	St. Bernadine Athletic (12)	Kierhuizen Boys (5)		BSN (16)
29	St. Bernadine Athletic (13)	Sparta (4) (defunct)		McCunnald (2)
30	St. Bernadine Accountants (4)	Kierhuizen Boys (6)		BSN (17)
31	Standard Lily (2)		Kierhuizen Boys (7)		BSN (18)			
32	VF Romainring			Tijhuis Archimedes (8)		Stadler Works (4)
33	St. Bernadine Athletic (14)	Tijhuis Archimedes (9)		OSA (5)
34	St. Bernadine Accountants (5)	Kierhuizen Boys (8)		MAG (2)
35	St. Bernadine Accountants (6)	1860 Delénacht			Stadler Works (5)
36  	FC Städeli (4)			De Tike FC (4)			OSA (6)
37	VF Romainring (2)		De Tike FC (5)			OSA (7)	
38	St. Bernadine Athletic (15)	Kierhuizen Boys (9)		Hauser & Kofel (3)
39	VF Romainring (3)		Axis Driessche (3)		OSA (8)
40	Raven Thöni (2)			Orchideeën (4)			OSA (9)
41	St. Bernadine Accountants (7)	Kierhuizen Boys (10)		Stadler Works (6)
42	Löwen Bessandorf		Orchideeën (5)			BSN (19)
43	St. Bernadine Accountants (8)	Orchideeën (6)			Hauser & Kofel (4)
44  	FC Städeli (5)			Orchideeën (7)			OSA (10)
45	St. Bernadine Amateur (7)	Orchideeën (8)			OSA (11)
46	St. Bernadine Athletic (16)	Orchideeën (9)			HPV
47	St. Bernadine Athletic (17)	Orchideeën (10)			Stadler Works (7)
48	Roterlicht Knokschäft		Orchideeën (11)			OSA (12)
49	Schwänenclub (2)		Orchideeën (12)			Benson Füchse
50	St. Bernadine Athletic (18)	Orchideeën (13)			FZK		
51	Immenmold (2)			Tijhuis Archimedes (10)		Hauser & Kofel (5)	
52  	FC Städeli (6)			Kierhuizen Boys (11)		OSA (13)
53	Raven Thöni (3)			Orchideeën (14)			Stadler Works (8)
54	St. Bernadine Athletic (19)	De Tike FC (6)			OSA (14)
55	Raven Thöni (4)			Orchideeën (15)			FZK (2)
56	Standard Lily (3)		Orchideeën (16)			FZK (3)
57	Raven Thöni (5)			Kierhuizen Boys (12)		FZK (4)
58	Raven Thöni (6)			Tijhuis Archimedes (11)		FZK (5)

TITLES

	St. Bernadine Athletic (19)	Orchideeën (16)			BSN (19)
	St. Bernadine Accountants (8)	Kierhuizen Boys (12)		OSA (14)
	St. Bernadine Amateur (7)	Tijhuis Archimedes (11)		Stadler Works (8)
  	FC Städeli (6)			Sparta (4) (defunct)		Hauser & Kofel (5)		
	Raven Thöni (6)			Tulip Maartenstad (3)		FZK (5)
	VF Romainring (3)		Axis Driessche (3)		McCunnald (2)
	Standard Lily (3)		Achille Oranjestadt (2)		MAG (2)
	Schwänenclub (2)		1860 Delénacht (1)		Beath SSC (1)
	Immenmold (2)							HPV (1)
	Löwen Bessandorf (1)						Benson Füchse (1)
	Roterlicht Knokschäft (1)

*Kierhuizen Boys were formerly known as Kozakken Boys, all records amended.

SteuerLigen Era

Seas.	1st		 		2nd				3rd  
UICA-era
59	Raven Thöni			FC Städeli			Standard Lily
60	Raven Thöni (2)			St. Bernadine Athletic		St. Bernadine Accountants	
61	Raven Thöni (3)			Standard Lily			OSA	
62	Raven Thoni (4)			St. Bernadine Accountants	Kierhuizen Boys*
63	Tijhuis Archimedes		FC Städeli			Raven Thöni
64	Raven Thöni (5)			Standard Lily			Orchideeën		
65	FC Städeli			Raven Thöni			Orchideeën
66	Standard Lily			Tijhuis Archimedes		Orchideeën
67	FC Städeli (2)			Standard Lily			FZK
68	Standard Lily (2)		FC Städeli			MAG
69	St. Bernadine Athletic		Standard Lily			BSN	
70	Standard Lily (3)		Tijhuis Archimedes		Kierhuizen Boys
71	Standard Lily (4)		Tijhuis Archimedes		Stadler Works
72	Tijhuis Archimedes (2)		FZK				St. Bernadine Athletic	
73	FZK				Raven Thöni			Tijhuis Archimedes
74	BSN				Orchideeën			Tijhuis Archimedes

IFCF-era
75/01	FC Städeli (3)			Orchideeën			Raven Thöni
76/02	Orchideeën			Tijhuis Archimedes		Raven Thöni
77/03	Tijhuis Archimedes (3)		Raven Thöni			FC Städeli
78/04	Standard Lily (5)		Raven Thöni			Stadler Works
79/05	Standard Lily (6)		Orchideeën			Kierhuizen Boys	
80/06	Standard Lily (7)		Kierhuizen Boys			St. Bernadine Amateur
81/07	Standard Lily (8)		Kierhuizen Boys			St. Bernadine Athletic
82/08	Standard Lily (9)		Orchideeën			Raven Thöni
83/09*	FZK (2)				St. Bernadine Amateur		Stadler Works	
	* Orchideeën, Tijhuis Archimedes & Kierhuizen Boys all relegated for 'Orange Ref' corruption scandal
84/10	FC Städeli (4)			BSN				St. Bernadine Athletic
85/11	FZK (3)				St. Bernadine Accountants	FC Städeli
86/12	St. Bernadine Amateur		St. Bernadine Athletic		Schäwnenclub
87/13	Standard Lily (10)		FC Städeli			FZK

*Kierhuizen Boys were formerly known as Kozakken Boys, all records amended.

SteuerLig Modern Era
Seas.	1st		 		2nd					3rd
88/14	Raven Thöni (6)			BSN *					Old Shakerssens	
89/15	Raven Thöni (7)			Standard Lily				St. Bernadine Athletic 
90/16	Raven Thöni (8)			Standard Lily				FC Städeli
91/17 §	FC Städeli (5)			Tijhuis Archimedes			Standard Lily
92/18 †	FC Städeli (6)			St. Bernadine Accountants		Tijhuis Archimedes
93/19	Standard Lily (11)		FC Städeli				Raven Thöni
94/20	Orchideeën (2)			FC Städeli				Septentriennes
95/21	Deltic FC (1)			Septentriennes				FC Städeli
96/22 ‡	Deltic FC (2)			Orchideeën				Septentriennes
97/23 †	Orchideeën (3)			FC Städeli				Septentriennes
98/24	Septentriennes (2)		Orchideeën				Old Shakerssens
99/25	Septentriennes (3)		Kierhuizen Boys				Old Shakerssens
00/26	Deltic FC (3)			Tijhuis Archimedes			Orchideeën

SteuerLigen Titles
	Standard Lily		11 (+3 Southern League Titles, 2 FFI Confederations Trophy)
	Raven Thöni		 8 (+6 Southern League Titles)
	FC Städeli		 6 (+6 Southern League Titles, 1 Tax Cup, 2 FFI League of Victors)
	Orchideeën		 3 (+16 OranjiLig Titles, 1 Tax Cup, 3 Super Cup, 1 FFI League of Victors)
	Septentriennes / BSN  	 3 (+19 WorksLigen Titles, 1 Tax Cup, 1 FFI League of Victors)
	Deltic FC		 3 (+1 World Cup, Independents Cup, IFCF Challenger's Cup, IFCF Super Cup, Tax Cup & 3 TX Super Cup)
	Tijhuis Archimedes	 3 (+11 OranjiLig Titles)
	FZK			 3 (+5 WorksLigen Titles)
	St. Bernadine Athletic	 1 (+19 Southern League Titles)
	St. Bernadine Amateur	 1 (+7 Southern League Titles, 1 TaxPokal, 1 SuperPokal)

§ - SteuerLig & TaxPokal double
† - SteuerLig & League of Victors double
‡ - SteuerLig, Challengers Cup & Super Cup treble
* - BSN are now known as Septentriennes

For the extra-retentive, here's some data on recent promotions from second to top tier; from season '95, from third to second; and from '99, from fourth to third.

SteuerLig-2 Modern Era
Seas.	1st		 		2nd					3rd				Play-off winner 
88/14	De Tike FC [p]			Kierhuizen Boys	[p]			Orchideeën			-	
89/15	Orchideeën [p]			Tijhuis Archimedes			VF Romainring			- 
90/16	Tijhuis Archimedes [p]		VF Romainring 				1860 Delénacht [po]		1860 Delénacht				
91/17	OSA [p]				VF Romainring [p]			Benson Foxes			St. Bernadine Academical [po]
92/18	Zotteeik [p]			De Tike FC [p]				Benson Foxes [po]		Benson Foxes
93/19	Fortuna Städeli [p]		Sturm Havn [p]				BSSC Driessche			HPV Waallen [po]
94/20	Motor Waallen [p]		Axis Driessche [p]			BSSC Driessche			Schwänenclub [po]
95/21	Kierhuizen Boys [p]		Fortuna Städeli [p]			OSA-Cyclista			BSSC Driessche [po]
96/22	OSA-Cyclista (2) [p]		Napoleon St. Bernadine			Schwänenclub			Urban Irminger [po]
97/23	Sturm Havn [p]			St. Gight's Albion [p]			Napoleon St. Bernadine		Zotteeik [po]
98/24	ASMV St. Bernadine [p]		Napoleon St. Bernadine [po]		Raven Thöni			Napoleon St. Bernadine				
99/25	Dandelion Town FC [p]		Motor Waallen [p]			Helvétique Rangers		Napoleon St. Bernadine [*]
00/26	Fortuna Städeli (2) [p]		Lions Bessendorf [p]			Raven Thöni [po]		Benson Foxes [π]

Lig-3 Modern Era
Seas.	1st		 		2nd					3rd				Play-off winner 
95/21	Olimpia Oranjestadt [p]		Napoleon St. Bernadine [p]		Helvétique Rangers [po]		Helvétique Rangers
96/22	Rankfelden Cardinals [p]	1860 Delénacht				Boilinghouse Nettle [po]	Boilinghouse Nettle
97/23	ASMV St. Bernadine [p]		1860 Delénacht [p]			Immenmold			Rotor Küsneuve [po]
98/24	Dandelion Town FC [p]		Stadler Works				Axis Driessche			Watling Street Ramblers [po]			
99/25	VF Romainring [p]		Boilinghouse Nettle [p]			Immenmold			FZK-Amstell [*]
00/26	McCunnald FC [p]		Stadler Works [p]			VF Merzberger-07 [po]		St. Bernadine Apollo [π]

Trumpanzee Garbage Lig-4
Seas.	1st		 		2nd					3rd				Play-off winner 
99/25	St. Bernadine Apollo [p]	Hibernien [p]				Esterden Reds			Roterlicht Knokschäft [*]
00/26	Torpedo Tijhuis [p]		Mount Shilling Casuals [p]		Supersaurus! [po]		Energia Niekerk [π]

[p] - Promoted; [po] - Promoted as play-off winner [π] - promoted as play-off runner-up [*] - won play-off as relegation candidate

by **Taxhavn** » Fri Aug 18, 2023 11:48 pm

TAX-Cup: The Knockout Competition
A Very Modern Competition

Inaugurated for the 91st season of football on the island, the TaxPokal (as it was) or TAX-Cup is the official knockout cup of league members. Though there have been cup competitions right back to the beginning of football history in Deltic Waters, in Taxhavn they never managed to establish a single tournament that represented the historical 'main' cup. Competing competitions came and went, clubs chose to participate or not, and some long established cups like the Oranjibeker (1882) have never featured the professional or works teams. Though most of the big clubs have won some domestic cup or other in their history, no-one especially trumpets it and to some extent, boasting about the SuperLoaf Westen Star Floodlit Cup is somewhat unfashionable. But with clubs now able to enter interregional tournaments and the IFCF Cup Winners Cup going begging, FA-Tax decided to make the most of the opportunity and establish TaxPokal, the League Members Cup. It officially 'Wightlingised' to 'the TAX-Cup' in '99.

After the first season, in which FC Städeli won the double of league and cup, entry was altered following concerns about the number of matches some clubs had to play in a season. From season '92, IFCF qualifiers for the two main competitions of Champions League and Challengers Cup were no longer given entry to the TAX-Cup. This meant persistent interregional qualifiers might never compete for the Cup; beginning with FC Städeli, the first winners, who were not permitted to defend their title. In a nation where the knockout competition had never really warmed in the hearts of clubs or supporters, this seemed less a travesty than it might in other nations where such competitions are held in higher regard.

Nomark Nothing™ Tax Cup Resuls
Seas.	Winner		 	Score	Runner-Up  

91/17 §	FC Städeli 		  4-0 	Standard Lily
92/18	St. Bernadine Amateur	  1-0 	De Tike FC
93/19	Orchideeën		  2-1 	Raven Thöni 	(AET; FT 0-0)
94/20	St. Bernadine Accountants 2-0 	Septentriennes
95/21 	De Tike FC		  3-1	St. Bernadine Academical
96/22	Taxhavn City		  1-0	De Tike FC
97/23	HPV Waallen		  2-1	Old Shakerssens
98/24	HPV Waallen		  4-4	Napoleon St. Bernadine (AET; FT 3-3; 4-1 pen.)
99/25	Deltic FC		  3-1	Napoleon St. Bernadine
00/26	Septentriennes		  4-1	Helvétique Rangers

Nomark Nothing™ Tax Cup Winners & Finalists
	Club			Wins	Finals

	HPV Waallen		   2	 2
	De Tike FC		   1	 3
	Septentriennes		   1	 2
	FC Städeli		   1 	 1
	St. Bernadine Amateur	   1	 1
	Orchideeën		   1	 1
	St. Bernadine Accountants  1	 1
	Taxhavn City		   1	 1
	Deltic FC		   1	 1
	Napoleon St. Bernadine	   0	 2
	Standard Lily		   0 	 1
	Raven Thöni		   0	 1
	St. Bernadine Academical   0	 1
	Old Shakerssens		   0	 1
	Helvétique Rangers	   0	 1

§ - league & cup double

And an even newer competition, the Tachyon SuperCup, which happens at the beginning of the season as a match-up between the Nomark Nothing™ Tax Cup winner (home team) and the Solitary Soccer League winner (away team). Inaugurated as the SuperPokal, it was 'Wightlingised' to SuperCup in '99, at which time it also took on the name of a sponsor, Tachyon, manufacturers of - some say - the world's most luxuriest, fastest and most tax deductable super cars.

The Tachyon SuperCup Resuls
Seas.	Cup Winner (home team) 	Score	League champion (away team)  

93/19	St. Bernadine Amateur	  4-1 	FC Städeli
94/20	Orchideeën		  4-4 	Standard Lily 	(4-2 pen.)
95/21	Septentriennes †	  1-3	Orchideeën
96/22	De Tike FC		  1-2	Deltic FC
97/23	Taxhavn	City		  3-3	Deltic FC	(4-5 pen.)
98/24	HPV Waallen		  1-4	Orchideeën
99/25	HPV Waallen		  2-2	Septentriennes  (4-3 pen.)
00/26	Deltic FC		  4-2	Septentriennes

† Septentriennes were Cup runners-up, but winners St.B Accountants had been disbanded
SuperPokal Winners & Finalists
	Club			Wins	Finals

	Orchideeën		   3	 3
	Deltic FC		   3	 3	
	HPV Waallen		   1	 2
	St. Bernadine Amateur	   1	 1
	Septentriennes		   0	 3
	FC Städeli		   0 	 1
	Standard Lily		   0 	 1
	De Tike FC		   0	 1
	Taxhavn City		   0	 1

by **Taxhavn** » Fri Aug 18, 2023 11:49 pm

Interregional Club Football
Taxhavn Teams Against The World

A summary of club performances in IFCF and FFI competitions from Taxhavn's first entries in season '89 (locally), or IFCF season 15 on the international calendar.

IFCF Performances, by club
Club				Seas	CL apps/best	SC apps/best	CC apps/best	AT apps/best	CWC apps/best	RS apps/best	LB apps/best
Winners
Deltic FC			5	2	R16	1	WON	3	WON	1	R32	1	QF	2	QF	-	-
ASMV St. Bernadine		1	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	1	WON
Senior competition entries
Orchideeën			9	5	R16	-	-	5	R16	2	QF	1	Pre	2	R16	1	QPO
Standard Lily			8	1	3Q	-	-	8	G-4th	1	RU	-	-	-	-	-	-
Tijhuis Archimedes		8	-	-	-	-	6	R32	-	-	-	-	-	-	2	QPO
FC Städeli			7	4	R16	-	-	6	R16	-	-	1	R32	2	R16	-	-
Septentriennes §		7	3	SF	-	-	5	RU	2	R16	-	-	2	QF	-	-
Raven Thöni			4	2	G-3rd	-	-	3	R32	-	-	-	-	2	R16	1	QPO		
Kierhuizen Boys *		4	2	R16	-	-	2	G-3rd	1	R32	-	-	1	R16	1	SF
HPV Waallen			4	-	-	-	-	2	G-4th	1	G-3rd	2	R16	-	-	-	-
De Tike FC			3	-	-	-	-	1	3Q	-	-	1	QF	-	-	1	QPO
Taxhavn City			2	1	3Q	-	-	2	R32	1	R32	1	1R	-	-	-	-
St. Bernadine Accountants	2	-	-	-	-	1	4Q	-	-	1	R32	-	-	-	-
St. Bernadine Amateur		2	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	1	R32	-	-	-	-
Old Shakerssens			2	2	QPO	-	-	2	QPO	1	G-3rd	-	-	-	-	-	-	
Boldsea FC			2	-	-	-	-	2	R32	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-
St. Bernadine Athletic		1	-	-	-	-	1	2Q	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-
Second tier competition only
VF Romainring			3	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	3	R16
OSA-Cyclista †			3	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	3	QPO
Fortuna Städeli			2	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	2	SF
Sturm Havn			2	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	2	SF
Napoleon St. Bernadine		2	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	1	R16	2	QF
Zotteeik			2	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	2	QF
BSSC Driessche			2	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	2	R16
Benson Foxes			2	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	2	3Q
Motor Waallen			2	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	1	QF
St. Gight's Albion		1	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	1	QF
Schwänenclub			1	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	1	G-4th
Axis Driessche			1	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	1	QPO
1860 Delénacht			1	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	1	2Q
Dandelion Town			1	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	1	QF
Helvétique Rangers		1	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	1	G-3rd
Youth competition only
St. Bernadine Academical	1	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	1	QF	-	-
Ordered first by titles; then number of separate seasons entered IFCF competitions

Abbreviations: 
WON - winner; RU - runner-up; SF, QF - semis & quarters; R16, R32, KPO - knockout rounds & play-off; 
G - group stage & position; QPO, 1-4Q - qualifying rounds & play-off; Pre - preliminary round

§ Septentriennes first appearance was as BSN
* Kierhuizen Boys first appearance was as Kozakken Boys
† OSA-Cyclista first appearance was as OSA-Fahrräder

IFF Performances, by club
Club				LV apps/best	CT apps/best
FC Städeli			5	WON(2)*	-	-	* also 1xRU
Orchideeën			4	WON	1	R16
Septentriennes			4	WON	-	-
Standard Lily			3	R16	4	WON(2)
Raven Thöni			3	QF	1	SF
Deltic FC			2	QF	-	-
St. Bernadine Accountants	1	SF	1	R32
Tijhuis Archimedes		1	R32	1	R32
Kierhuizen Boys			1	R32	-	-
OSA-Cyclista †			-	-	1	WON
Taxhavn City			-	-	1	RU
BSSC Driessche			-	-	1	SF
ASMV St. Bernadine		-	-	1	SF
St. Bernadine Athletic		-	-	1	QF
Ordered first by number of separate seasons entered FFI competitions

Abbreviations: 
WON - winner; RU - runner-up; SF, QF - semis & quarters; R16, R32, KPO - knockout rounds & play-off; 
G - group stage & position; QPO, 1-4Q - qualifying rounds & play-off; Pre - preliminary round

† OSA-Cyclista first appearance was as OSA-Fahrräder

by **Taxhavn** » Fri Aug 18, 2023 11:50 pm

Individual Player Awards
The Golden Balls, Boots, Gloves, Tickets & so on

Each year since season '90, at the end-of-season ball traditionally held at the Grand Bullion Hotel & Spa Resort in St. Bernadine City, a whole host of forgettable awards are presented, and six unforgettable ones. Just in case we forget, here they are, year by year:

Golden Ball (Best Player)
 90 Bors Warwick              NPH  Raven Thöni
 91 Valentin Fey              TAX  Raven Thöni
 92 Burus Tasher              DLT  FC Städeli
 93 Laurent Lapix             RCN  Standard Lily
 94 Aslak Hrafninnsson        PIS  Orchideeën
 95 Burus Tasher (2)          DLT  Deltic FC
 96 Burus Tasher (3)          DLT  Deltic FC
 97 Jeroen Blenkers           TAX  Orchideeën
 98 Rollo Heron               TAX  Septentriennes
 99 Ottaviano Falco           TAX  Septentriennes
100 Alfie Alderskell          DLT  Deltic FC	

Golden Boot (Top Scorer)
 90 Pauli Morff               TAX  Septetriennes
 91 Mere Eljas Faliri         FFD  Standard Lily
 92 Martim Picasso            PFA  FC Städeli
 93 Zubi Zuberbühler          TAX  FC Städeli
 94 Zubi Zuberbühler (2)      TAX  FC Städeli	
 95 Danny Mastorqa            DLT  Deltic FC
 96 Jeroen Blenkers           TAX  Orchideeën
 97 Jeroen Blenkers (2)       TAX  Orchideeën
 98 Mikkel Bukt               PUG  Old Shakerssens
 99 Rollo Heron               TAX  Septentriennes
100 Tétény Csorba             PAS  Tijhuis Archimedes

Golden Glove (Best Keeper)
 90 Fiete Dällenbach          TAX  Standard Lily
 91 Ivan Klank                XAN  FC Städeli
 92 Ivan Klank (2)            XAN  FC Städeli
 93 Fiete Dällenbach (2)      TAX  Standard Lily
 94 Ivan Klank (3)            XAN  FC Städeli
 95 Barnaby Flexney           TAX  Septentriennes
 96 Jon Moe                   BEO  Old Shakerssens
 97 Florijs van Aysma         TAX  Taxhavn City
 98 Hermannus Roe             TAX  Deltic FC
 99 Raûl Sarmiento            TEQ  Kierhuizen Boys
100 Geo van Ghent             TAX  Orchideeën

Golden Visa (Best Foreigner)
 90 Bors Warwick              NPH  Raven Thöni
 91 Sami Samiii	              VIL  Tijhuis Archimedes	
 92 Aslak Hrafninnsson        PIS  Orchideeën
 93 Michael Gaffigan          TKT  Standard Lily
 94 Georg Bardo               PUG  Septentriennes
 95 Georg Bardo (2)           PUG  Septentriennes
 96 Aslak Hrafninnsson (2)    PIS  Orchideeën
 97 Maximilien Laminien       KOR  Orchideeën
 98 Kjartan Lúnquerque        AUD  Old Shakerssens
 99 Denzel Keegan             AUD  Old Shakerssens
100 Tétény Csorba             PAS  Tijhuis Archimedes

Golden Pram (Best Youth)
 90 Blaz Kovacec              MYT  Raven Thöni
 91 Blaz Kovacec (2)          MYT  Raven Thöni
 92 Raphael Kaiser            TAX  Raven Thöni
 93 Filip-Alekso Stojkov      MYT  1860 Delénacht
 94 Casper Kinderman          PIS  FC Städeli
 95 Rogelio Carreón           VIS  St. Bernadine Academical
 96 Charley Daggersfield      TAX  Septentriennes
 97 Tristan Featherstone      TKT  Septentriennes
 98 Yaya Onana                ZGA  De Tike FC
 99 Tristan Featherstone (2)  TKT  Septentriennes
100 Herman Kind               TAX  Deltic FC	

Golden Stick (Best Veteran)
 90 Tanica Darr Qib 'iithli   GEE  FC Städeli
 91 Lothaire Cromwell         NPH  FC Städeli
 92 Martim Picasso            PFA  FC Städeli
 93 Helios Ray                AUD  FC Städeli
 94 Ozan Welch                TKT  Benson Foxes	
 95 Untto Squaker             DLT  Deltic FC
 96 Untto Squaker (2)         DLT  Deltic FC
 97 Ozan Welch (2)            TKT  Benson Foxes
 98 Darko Tonel               SRS  Zotteeik
 99 Odwin Muir                CMT  Kierhuizen Boys
100 Renni Boom                TAX  Tijhuis Archimedes

by **Taxhavn** » Fri Aug 18, 2023 11:51 pm

Taxhavn
A Map

by **Taxhavn** » Fri Aug 18, 2023 11:54 pm

The Big Three or Six or maybe Ten
Those That Rule

Your introduction to the SteuerLig Club Directory

Who are the clubs at the pointy end of the Taxhavn football pyramid, and what are they doing there? In this article we gather together an archive of articles posted in various places about some of the most successful, or biggest, or most historically significant teams in the SteuerLig, Taxhavn's premier football league. In theory, any team with enough money to burn can make it to the top - most of these teams have done it, some are still doing it, some can only reminisce about doing it.

An ongoing series.

Standard Lily
SteuerLig's All-Time Leading Champion

In the modern era, Standard Lily can be defined as the leading club of the Big Three, or Big Six, depending on how you slice the cake. With ten titles in the first three decades since the foundation of the SteuerLig, the ‘Pollen Counters’ from Havn, in the south of the island, have shone through as the emergent team. Despite the unification of the league being organised specifically to bring together the might of the Triple-A (St. Bernadine ruling clubs Athletic, Amateur and Accountants) with the Oranji giants Orchideeën and the all-conquering works team, BSN (now better known as Septentriennes), it was three smaller teams who adapted to unified football faster - Raven Thöni, FC Städeli and in particular Standard. The Pollen Counters came virtually from nowhere, having won a meagre three titles in the Southern League era, in 1921, ’31 and ’56. Hardly giants.

Founded in 1871 in Havn, at that time a small harbour town serving St. Bernadine city, properly called Saint’s Haven, the Standard Athletic Club were a group of yacht owners who wanted their own social club, and after finding rugby a little too homo-erotic for their tastes, set upon association football as their hobby of choice. In the 1890s the club, experiencing financial difficulties and a lack of interest from the sailing community, were taken over by a hugely successful tennis and badminton association, the Saint’s Haven Lawn Tennis Association, then of Lily Street, Saint’s Haven. From that adoption came Standard Lily FC, a small, sustainable but ultimately insignificant football club who were founder members of the Southern League in 1901, largely on the back of the members’ business connections to the Triple-A family of industrialists, bankers, commercial entrepreneurs and soon-to-be billionaires.

The early years were a struggle and Standard were four times re-elected to the Southern League after finishing bottom, but slow improvements led to a surprise title in ’21, a competitive decade following, and ulitmately a second title in ’31, all under the leadership of legendary manager Silvester Heyton. After the second title, his retirement brought decline and further wilderness years before the emergence of the new, improved, and thoroughly dominant SteuerLig kings. They won a third Southern League title three years before unification, and upon foundation of the shiny new SteuerLig, competed directly with Raven Thöni in the early seasons as the old giants - the Triple-A, Orchideeën, BSN - failed to ignite in the pressure cooker of the new format.

With the growth of modern Havn into a wealthy city in the giant metropolitan zone of St. Bernadine, Standard was acquired by media mogul Xylon Grimm, and his investment - including the construction of the 36,000-seater state of the art Havnstadion - turned the Pollen Counters into a powerhouse, winning ten titles to put them far and away the most successful team of the SteuerLig era. In the present decade (the '90s, in the Taxhavn calendar), a highly competitive league has diminished their outright dominance with half a dozen or more clubs regularly competing for honours. Fans are restless for more glory as they watch their main rivals catching up on them and their once unmatchable SteuerLig title haul. In a far cry from humble origins as a millionaire yachtsmen’s play thing, they are spending big to recapture the glory, including a one-time island record ₸X26m. shillings on Reçueunese midfield Laurent Lapix.

Raven Thöni
The Upstarts From Out West

Second of the Big Three - in the modern era, by titles won - is a team from ‘the districts’. Raven Thöni, from the west side of the island, exist almost as a slap in the face to the superiority complexes of the northern powerhouses and the southern ‘gentlemen footballers’, coming from a place where football had never quite taken hold in the same way because - so the thinking goes - everyone was more interested in the middle-class pursuits of golf, golf, and, um, golf. Indeed, though they are considered one of the elder clubs of the suburban western districts, they were only formed in 1908 and are relatively junior by the standards of the north and south. Without a league of their own, like the few other district teams of the time, they veered toward the end of the island closest geographically; so while 1860 Delénacht and Axis Driessche competed in the northern Oranjilig, the All-Blacks joined VF Romainring and Immenmold in the Southern League.

Less than a decade after foundation, they surprised everybody - not least themselves - by winning the Southern League in ’17, promising great things to come. But such explosive progress was unsustainable for the team from Thöni, and many of that championship-winning team broke up and left, including founder member-come-star player and top scorer Brun Rangendingers, drawn away by the bright lights of the city and the fat pay cheques of St. Bernadine Athletic. The defending champions were relegated the following season, and spent another decade in the second tier. Former hero Rangendingers became the arch-villain of Thöni, and remains a mythical embodiment of the chip on the district shoulder for big shots in the city.

The All-Blacks regained their top flight status in ’29, spent a few seasons yoyoing but built toward a second title just over a decade later in the 40th Southern League season. The beginning of their modern dominance came in the 50s however, under managers Tilcken Gÿger and his successor Otto Blattner. ‘The Master’ Gÿger built a club from the ground up through the late 40s, and won their third Southern League title in ’53, as the idea was beginning to form for a new, all-island super league. He guided them to a second title in three seasons in ’55, before handing over the reins to his assistant, Blattner. Blattner led Raven to successive titles in ’57 and ’58 before the beginning of the SteuerLig, and then a remarkable four-in-a-row at the outset of the new era, from ’59 to ’62. They won a fifth title in ’64. In total, during the Gÿger-Blattner era, the All-Blacks took eight of a possible twelve titles, and were champions in six consecutive seasons during the transition from regional to pan-island leagues. The districts were officially more than just golf, thanks to Raven Thöni.

After finishing second in ’65 Otto Blattner retired, and the All-Blacks lost their supreme grip on island football as Standard Lily and to some extent FC Städeli came to dominate the league. Raven failed to mount much of a challenge until former player turned head coach Jovin Strähl was appointed under the energetic new ownership of tech millionaire-approaching-billionaire on the rise, Nathan Kriedler. The nerdy software and hardware developer bought the club as it entered it’s twentieth season without a title and were playing second fiddle (or worse) as Standard broke their record to win five SteuerLig titles in a row in the 70s, and ten overall to Raven’s five. But Strähl returned an ageing squad back to the top of the league and promised a dynasty as he led the old boys to three consecutive titles, breaking Lily’s grip in the process.

As of today, things are a little different. Jovin Strähl has moved on. The promised golden generation who were just breaking through as Strähl's Veterans won the three-in-a-row never really materialised, and in the highly competitive modern era of the 90s, with many teams reinforcing for greatness, Raven have fallen into the doldrums. It's happened before, it will happen again. But Raven have done enough already to qualify as one of 'The Big 3/6/10/whatever'. And for sure they'll be back. Sometime.

FC Städeli
From Rabid Underdog To SteuerLig Overlords

It is hard to imagine, if you are new to Taxhavnite football, that FC Städeli, The Frigates, have ever been anything but the supreme power of football on the isle. Recent double championships, the first TaxPokal cup winners, making it a league and cup double (and likely the only team who will be able to do that because of new regulations on cup entries), the first team to win an intercontinental title with the recent FFI League of Victors triumph, which they incredibly turned into another double triumph of two in a row - they stood head and shoulders above the rest, with many looking on and wondering if they could ever be caught. But people said that of Standard Lily and Raven Thöni, and before that of St. Bernadine Athletic and BSN and the once seemingly invincible Orchideeën. Dynasties rise and fall, and The Frigates were perhaps at their peak. It won’t always be so, and it wasn’t always so.

Founded by the Städeli family, industrialists and bankers who established their own suburb of St. Bernadine city which has since grown into a city in its own right, FC Städeli was the second football club they established after their own official works team for the Stadler Land & Sea Corporation, best known as Stadler Works FC. With the foundation of the Southern League, Stadler Works were denied entry and were instumental in setting up the rival WorksLigen; but wanting to hedge their bets and compete in the local gentlemen’s league, the family founded the ‘separate but related’ FC Städeli instead, and forced their way into the league against resistance from the Triple-A clubs that operated the league - St. Bernadine’s Athletic, Amateur and Accountants football clubs, who pretty much ran football at the time. Only a cunning and complex legal challenge got the Frigates a place in the league from the founding season, and they’ve naturally had a big chip on their shoulders ever since… not without justification.

Enjoying being the underdog thorn in the side of the Triple-A comes naturally to FC Städeli, who, after fighting their way into the league, were the first team who weren’t a Triple-A to win the Southern League, after seven consecutive titles to one or other of the three; the ’08 title was followed by two more in ’10 and ’12, as The Frigates threatened to match their early rivals. But the challenge faded away, and intermittently good seasons were few and far between as the team settled into mediocrity. Still they can point to never having been relegated out of the top division of the Southern League, and won three more titles in the next half century before the coming of the SteuerLig, to make them equal most successful (with Raven Thöni) of all Southern League teams who weren’t the Triple-A.

The story in the new all-island league has been much the same until recently - never out of the top flight, the occasional title, but mostly playing catch-up to a new dominant pairing of Raven and Standard Lily, as the Triple-A threat faded. Winning the third most titles in the new era gets them in the modern ‘Big Three’ - very much in third place - but their early 90s rise to dominance under Quebecois coach Bradley Kemerer-Lascelles put them firmly in the driving seat. Five trophies in three seasons makes them as strong as any in the present time, rather than the rabid underdogs biting at the heels of superior clubs which has been their place for most of football history on the island.

by **Taxhavn** » Fri Aug 18, 2023 11:57 pm

Blood, Sweat & Tiers
The Taxhavn Pyramid

Your introduction to teams further down the pyramid

Who are at the grass roots of Taxhavn football, and what are they doing there? In this article we gather together an archive of articles posted in various places about some of the humblest, or smallest, or most ambitiously insignificant teams in the football pyramid of Taxhavn. In theory, any team with enough money to burn can make it to the top - will it be any of these?

An ongoing series.

• Escalasquiens
• Lada Tijhuis
• BVB Supersaurus!
• Aubinsville Kickers
• Watling Street Ramblers

Escalasquiens
Southern League

The Southern League used to be The League. It was founded in old St. Bernadine city a crazy long time ago, by three clubs who ruled everything football - Athletic, Accountants and Amateur; the Triple-A. Their members discovered football at its point of origin - Ariddia - and imported it to Taxhavn. They coded it, they arranged all the fixtures, they held competitions, they decided who was eligible to play: they were the precursor to the modern idea of an FA, and they founded the Taxhavnite FA, which is now called FA-Tax. They alledgedly still run the FA. And they came up with the idea of the Southern League, a league of gentlemen. Until the coming of the newly (and alledgedly) independent body which we now know as FA-Tax, and with it the (alledgedly) independent SteuerLig in the 50s, the Southern League was the first and the supreme league, for teams from St. Bernadine, Havn, and the satellite southern towns and districts of Städeli, Helvétique, Michelet, Bruxaïlles, Gonaïves, and Longlarie. In that time, the Triple-A dominated the league and when they left to join the SteuerLig, the Southern League dropped into some obscurity. Teams unwilling or unable to join the new pan-island league were left to fend for themselves, but out of that came an amateur league with a solid history and a strong gentlemanly reputation, with several ancient clubs of remarkable heritage who now dominate the upper reaches of that lower league. One of them is Escalasquiens, from the city of Helvétique.

Named for the street on which they have their old and tiny stadium, Rue Escalasqua, the team who play in 'old white' (white with black buttons) are considered among the most gentlemanly of the gentleman football teams, and continue to enshrine an impractical level of sporting conduct which includes never giving away a penalty, and allowing an uncontested shot from the penalty spot when they do with the goalkeeper standing aside, by way of apology. This forced them down the league as more cycnical play earned greater rewards, and they were founder members of the second, third, fourth, fifth and sixth tiers when persistent last-placed finishes left them forced to open new divisions so they could relegate themselves. They have a huge cult following for such ridiculous shenanigans, and have recently been in a position where they have had to apologise for doing well - rising back to the top flight of the Southern League where they have remained for more than a decade, even competing for titles. In a recent review of their own Manual for Gentlemanly Conduct, there was supposedly a huge row about whether it was even acceptable to try to win matches, and in a significant modernising shift, it was narrowly voted in favour of introducing a 'competitiveness clause' into the constitution which would allow them to be unapologetically good, if they should so happen to turn out like that, and to 'try to win'. It has coincided with this rise toward the top of the Southern League, but old habits die hard and they still issue an official apology at the end of each season to every team whom they finish higher up in the league. Which seems to be more teams with each passing season.

Lada Tijhuis
SteuerLig; promoted from OranjiLig

Up in the northern metropolis of Oranjestadt there are plenty of settlers from around the multiverse who came to the isle through the huge docklands seeking work in the great factories of Oranjestadt and Amsterlo, drawn by the famous if slightly tarnished slogan of 'Made In Taxhavn'. Small and not so small communities of ex-pats can be found everywhere in the big cities, and it would be hard to miss 'Little Zykotika' in the Tijhuis district, where migrant Ruskos and Zykopats have gravitated to boil turnips and beets, to drink vodka, and to reminisce fondly of the good old days back in the ZZZR. Naturally, they have their own club, being football mad. Founded a century ago as Russo Tijhuis, the club has gone through several identities including a long period as ZZ-Tijhuis, when they were noticed and picked up by one of the giant ZZZR clubs, Lada Toskva, as an affiliate. They consequently changed once more into the club we know and loathe today, plumbing the depths of the lower OranjiLig divisions, starting fights at matches, constantly admonished for being drunk in charge of a moving football, illegal arms dealing in the clubhouse, misbehaviour on antisocial media and all those other stereotypes we commonly associate with the nefarious Zykotik Zoviet Republicz. Lada, of course, is the name of the famous Zykotic meme factory that builds silly ideas to destabilise capitocracies around the multiverse, a sort of university of spammer rogues. In the industrial pre-silicon days they built farm and factory machinery and steam cars. If steampunk had ever become a real thing, Lada would've been the General Steamers of the day. Nevertheless, with great cash reserves syphoned from state officials, Lada has traditionally sponsored one of the great teams of Zykotik football, and in what some consider a cunning attempt to subvert Taxhavnite society, now sponsor a team on the isle who maybe, one day, will rise to the top to embarrass everyone associated with football in Taxhavn.

BVB Supersaurus!
BezirksLiga

What's this, a club named after an energy drink? Only in Taxhavn!

Every banker on the edge needs something to top up the adderall, vyvanse and cocaine, and that's where Supersaurus! comes in. Supersaur your brain! Get raptor focus! Become the Rex! You are The Sauron! - these are some of the advertising promises of caffiene and taurine soda drink magnate Alke Schmalbaggs and his super hot brand Supersaurus!, which comes in an ever-expanding number of dino-themed flavours - Tyrannocola, Cherry Torvosaur, Ptangodactyl and Gatorade to name but four. Supersaurus! consumption is sweeping the island (might be addictive), turning Alke into an overnight billionaire desperately seeking a way to rinse those profits and get some tax relief. He started by sponsoring down-hill office chair racing with the all-conquering Supersaurus! Wheels Team, and has gone on to form a stunt-kite team, a hovercraft racing team, and the best-funded slot car race crew in the whole of the Wide Enness Ocean. Supersaurextrix! have the best cars with the most conductive bushes you can imagine. Whatever next for Alke Schmalbaggs and his endless energy drink fountain?

Well, football naturally. The thing is, Alke is quite a character, as you may have guessed. And he's somewhat... abrasive, shall we say? He made a lot of noise about revolutionising football in Taxhavn just when FA-Tax, the dominant closed-shop clubs and a few banks started their big project to revolutionise football in Taxhavn. He was frozen out, and couldn't get a step on the ladder either by buying out a top team or forming his own club - which he did first, but then found he was never going to be issued a licence to operate in the leagues. So he did things by stealth. His ancestral hometown, Zetterdorf, had it's own team competing in the third tier of the Bezirksliga, out in the western districts. He bought BVB Zetterdorf and it's league licence, exploited some legal loopholes, changed the name of the club, and has already won two promotions in two seasons to the top flight of the Bezirksliga. Next stop, SteuerLig. Rumours of multiclub ownership. In Zetterdorf, they are torn. On the one hand, they have never had it so good with the football. Never had they dreamed of the SteuerLig! On the other - well, he's changed their name, kit and identity for one thing. And for another, he's the latest in a long line of Schmalbaggs. And they were never fond of the Schmalbaggs in Zetterdorf.

Aubinsville Kickers
Southern League

Montrealaise go home!

World Cup 100 had a significant impact on Aubinsville town and its football team, the Kickers. When New Montreal States appeared back in the multiverse again to declare they would once more compete in the World Cup, the Kickers immediately lost their head coach and several young players. Taxhavn immigration policy kicked in and sent all the Montrealaise refugees home. It was another hard blow for the club.

The Kickers are the team on von Arnold Island - or Soccer Island, to use its modern moniker - set up by Orchideeën club captain and Polarian refugee Aslak Hrafninnsson. When his nation ceased to exist, inevitably the Polarian boat people started turning up in St. Bernadine Bay, along with the Osssidiacquans and Penthaelyssians and Bleak Islanders. Before them it was the Tero al Discoans, Basel-Triesians and Dispertagos; before that Eurans, Vilitans, Licentians, Schottians, Andossans... you name it, when the countries experience Catastrophic Termination Events (CTEs), there's usually a boat full of refugees in the Bay by the end of the week. When FA-Tax bought von Arnold Island and started work on the SoccerLand theme park, there were estimates of over one million squatters who needed rehoming - most of them heading off to the archipelago outcroppings of Le Tissier and Crugge, you know, out of sight, out of mind. About 50,000 of the healthiest and most responsible sounding refugees were permitted to stay as the labour force for the SoccerLand theme park, including the construction of their own company town of Aubinsville - and from there, Aslak got involved, discovered young Orchideeën starlet Kelvin Bisgaard-Hagen kicking a ball about the construction site, and formed a club of refugees - the Kickers - who play in the bottom tier of the Southern League.

But World Cup 100 brought a new set of challenges to the club. Nations often revive - Schottia, for example - after a long period in the darkness following a CTE, and at the Kickers they are used to losing a repatriated player or two every now and then. But the symbolic significance of the 100th World Cup brought back a host of nations all at once and the team lost their Montrealaise, Nethertopians and others in one go. Closer to home, both the Gnejsians and Andossan refugees formed their own clubs with significant support and early success - Dandelion Town FC and ASMV St. Bernadine respectively both members of the SteuerLig. Then of course FA-Tax did a deal to build the World Cup Final stadium, the Lithico™, and a lot of hardy workers from Aubinsville were callously spent in the emergency construction under Fluid Time conditions, whilst rumours persist to this day that a large group of able-bodied men and women and even some children have been 'disappeared' to Farfadillis, press-ganged into the eternal civil wars courtesy of a Lithico™ 'recruitment drive'. For the Kickers, this is an everyday threat to their existence. Fortunately for them, and tragically for the people involved, there is always a new boat sailing into St. Bernadine harbour. Why, just this week some sorry-looking questing knights from New-Addlebrand washed up on Aubin's Beach seeking sanctuary. The Soccer Island Baywatch confiscated all their rusty swords and religious paraphernalia, put them up in the beach huts and gave them a football to play with. Can any of the former knights cut the mustard? Only time will tell.

Watling Street Ramblers
SteuerLig; promoted from Southern League

A stroll with one of the oldest clubs in Taxhavn

There's a moderate ambition at the Ramblers these days that has perhaps never been seen before in the old gentlemen's club, or at least, not for a century or more. Older even than the ancient Triple-A teams of St. Bernadine - Athletic, Accountants and Amateurs - who would go on to write the codified rulebook and claim to have 'invented the game' in Taxhavn, the club was formed in the 1830s in the well-heeled uptown district of Oswyn in a back room of the Boar's Head Inn on Watling Street, where they began as a rambling and mountaineering association. When the football first arrived on these shores from Ariddia 1`x in the 1840s, the Ramblers would take one with them on their walking tours and in 1853 officially formed a footballing branch of the association, with their own set of rules. They later adopted the popular Triple-A ruleset and nearly half a century later after a great deal of informal contests, cups and friendlies, were one of the founding teams of the Southern League. In between there was the acrimonious split in the membership which led to the formation of the Mount Shilling Casuals club in the 1870s, and the start of a fierce and almost ungentlemanly rivalry that still exists to this day. It is perhaps the most hotly contested classiker of the lower ranks, officially called the Oswyn Derby and unofficially the Dastardly Classic.

In recent years the clubs have been leagues apart - The Ramblers qualifying for the third tier expansion of the SteuerLig, while the Casuals missed out. It meant their league fortunes were separated for the first time in nearly a century, although at certain times they have competed in different divisions of the Southern League. With the Ramblers enjoying the town's bragging rights, the Casuals responded by employing the famous Enda Clentin to change their fortunes, and they have certainly been impressive since he took over. They look good for a spot in the next SteuerLig expansion for next season. Keen to keep some distance between them, the Ramblers - who have looked a solid outfit with play-off finishes to their credit since the foundation of Lig-3 - are pushing for promotion to the second tier again. There stated aim is to reach the top flight... something surprisingly ambitious for a club that has never won a single piece of official silverware since the formation of league football in 1900. They have a couple of decent young players in keeper Roger Ufferman, 22, and centrehalf Manuel Doisneau, 20, who are making quite the name for themselves; and in Gian Summer, 32, they have one of the most exciting young head coaches breaking through on the scene.

by **Taxhavn** » Wed Oct 18, 2023 11:57 am

Season Preview
Season '89*

*With no agreed universal or multiversal calendar, and the Isle working on multiple calendars itself due to its various critical connections around the worlds, football uses the UICA calendar to keep track of historical data - though there has never been a time when the leagues entered the international club competitions until now. Further, to avoid confusion following the changeover to IFCF and restarting the count, UICA timekeeping is still applied with the new IFCF time appended in some records.

Title Contenders: BSN, Raven Thöni, Standard Lily
IFCF Challengers: FC Städeli, FZK, St. Bernadine Athletic
Best Of The Rest: Kozakken Boys, Shakerssen, St. Bernadine Accountants, OSA
Look Out, Fellas: St. Bernadine Amateur, De Tike FC, Hauser & Kofel
Its One of Three: Stadler Works, McCunnald, MAG

BSN
Manager: Reto Ehrensperger

The Greenbacks are back! At the dawn of the SteuerLigen, BSN stood as one of the three giants of football on the island - level on 19 regional league titles with St.Bernadine Athletic, and only behind Orchideeën for most consecutive titles, grabbing both a four- and a five-in-a-row at different times in their history. But it took sixteen seasons for them to win a SteuerLig, and there have been no more in the following fourteen. What became of the bank team with the infinite money pool? Who even cares... under veteran professor of football Reto Ehrensperger, the Greenbacks came within a whisker of the title last time around; and it is on everyone to stop them this time - they have a squad packed with talent and experience: it won't last forever, their time is now.

First XI: Alex Holzhauer, Weinert Marggi (C), Idrissa Konat (MAK), Mildore Clarke (BSE), Federico Kaufmann, Alessandro Kislig, Enno Eggen, Federicho Rütschi, Gustav Lindenmann, Jvars Greber, Hiltin Lier.

Prediction: Favourites. If this team can't do it, they'll never win anything, ever again...

Raven Thöni
Head Coach: Jovin Strähl

After winning five of the first six SteuerLigen, the All Blacks finally returned to the top of the pile last season for their sixth title after a two-decade drought. Building from the back with a veteran defence, and old-timer Ramon Back in goal, they are an exciting mix of young talent moving forward, with Luis Glücki and Valentin Fey, both 20, catching the eye in their debut seasons.

First XI: Ramon Buck, Ebi Hummel (C), Adrien Burkhard, Aerle, Urban Preisig, Laurin Laurer, Franklin von Gunten, Luis Glücki, Gillis Würsten, Isak Eberhard, Valentin Fey

Prediction: Title challenge. Under a young coach in only his third season of management with a lot of new-fangled ideas, they were a surprise last season, securing the title with a point to spare from a revived BSN. Two clubs hunting a return to former glory, and at Raven they have tech wunderkind Nathan Kreidler backing them - everything he codes seems to turn to gold: is this the beginning of an era at Raven Thöni?

Standard Lily
Manager: Nelo Holzer

Provided a disappointing defence of their title last time out, finishing 6th, which is far below expectations for the most successful team of the SteuerLig era. Nelo Holzer will need to get off to a good start to hold on to his job, as he's on borrowed time thanks only to his having won the club's tenth title the season before. Brought in highly rated keeper Fiete Dällenbach from Orchideeën to strengthen a vulnerable defence, and will be looking for more from Zenegalese strike partnership Natanaël Tanga and Jenson Masuka.

First XI: Fiete Dällenbach, Othmar Zesiger, Friedolin Spiess, Nando Balsiger, Riccardo Bürkli, Rafael Dorer, Jules Reimann, Raul Kopp (C), Natanaël Tanga (ZEN), Jenson Masuka (ZEN), Res Zweifel

Prediction: Must win a first IFCF place at the very least, should challenge for the title though many observers think the Pollen Counters are standing still. To do that will cost Nelo Holzer his job, and owner Xylon Grimm - not a popular man at the Havnstadion - will face a barrage of unhappy fan groups if they have another season like '88.

FC Städeli
Manager: Bendicht Saxer

Finishing only one place and three points ahead of their unofficial 'B' team, Stadler Works, in 8th, was a poor return last season for The Frigates. Has veteran head coach Bendicht Saxer run out of ideas? The team have performed well over the last few years, and they are not a 'sacking club', but it would be an anathema to be caught by their junior affiliate club. Promised investment in squad rebuilding has not yet materialised, the free transfer of Sanno Walder from BSN something of a coup but their only bit of business in the off-season.

First XI: Filippo Wyler, Gabriel Neumeister, Josif Rothacher, Sanno Walder, Guy Kòsi (ZEN), Linard Sutter, Jockel Schmidt, Jibril Benzema (BBS), Aaron Brechbühler, Gertjan van der Schuur, Till Haid

Prediction: Top four. On paper it's a good team that was building toward glory until last season's nightmare - but maybe that was just a blip. Smarting from all the criticism, they should bounce back.

FZK
Manager: Horatio Limit (WGT)

Another top team who had a bad season, finishing 10th and firing manager Nolan Gloor. That was harsh on him with the team missing Lionel Benz and Paulie Morf for the entire season through injury. They are both back and apparently training well, ready to reset things. Wightling manager Limit has brought in a couple of his own players too - look out for Isaiah Gloyas and Irksome Smith.

First XI: Sandro Tribelhorn, Lionel Benz, Christian Perreten, Uto Uhlmann, Irksome Smith (WGT), Jacinto Gempeler, Nino Fehlmann, Isaiah Gloyas (WGT), Oliver Heiniger, Paulie Morf, Simon Bessan

Prediction: On the edge of IFCF qualification. Mr. Limit is an unknown quantity but then, FZK have always had an unpredictable feel to them. Overall though, this is an ambitious outfit and they will expect their new head coach to mount a challenge for the title. That seems a little unlikely without more reinforcements.

St. Bernadine Athletic
Manager: Pirmin Wägeli

A fourth-placed finish last season was promising enough for 'The Honours' that they go into this season with supporters hopeful of pushing on back to a place of pre-eminence from where they have been exiled for so long. The team with the most titles in the pre-SteuerLigen era have been so adrift for so long. Two big signings in the forward line give cause for optimism - World Cup surprise package Delte coughing up it's two leading strikers in Danny Mastorqa and Tai Cerotha. The problem is, the rest of the squad is rather pedestrian.

First XI: Tim Speich, Raul Inäbnit, Lorian Germann (C), Vincent Aury (MUS), Paschalis Kopp, Samuel Hodel, Earl Kynance (BSE), Ramun Kunz, Danny Mastorqa (DLT), Tai Cerotha (DLT), Daniel Bösch

Prediction: Might push for an IFCF place... might. It should be more than that, but it isn't.

Kozakken Boys
Manager: Dan Stappenbelt

Forcibly languishing in the second tier for the past five seasons after the 'Orange Referee' matchfixing scandal, along with three other clubs, de Staalen hauled themselves back to the top flight at the first available opportunity - albeit by a narrow margin, stealing second place from under the nose of Orchideeën on the last day of the regular season, then beating them and Beath SSC in the playoffs to make it back to the top flight.

First XI: Prosper Lapierre (MUS), Reinout ten Cate, Gert-Jan Drioel, Florens Wiechers, Lennaert Vrielink (C), Jurian van Enk, Saturnin Barrios (TAM), Floris-Jan Veldhuis, Guus Mensink, Eduardo Mendoza (TAM), Stefaan Beldman

Prediction: Should easily hold their own and may even spring a surprise IFCF placing. The Oranji clubs are on their way up, and the Boys are leading the charge. Also they have a couple of Tamarindians in Saturnin Barrios and Eduardo Mendoza - you have to have a chance with Tamarindians in the team, right?

Shakerssen
Manager: Hänggi Rüfenacht

Managed by one of the two Rüfenacht brothers - Magnus is in charge of OSA - Shakerssen defied the odds last season to finish third. They were favourites to go down. Foekers, Müngers and Uunks: three standout players the Removers managed to hold on to who stood out from the crowd, and form the backbone of the team's hopes to repeat such a lofty finish. Can you imagine them in the Champions League?! Lol.

First XI: Mark Rüegger, Linard Geissbühler, Machiel Foekers, Nino Brawand, Rätus Bur, Lorin Müngers, Andrae Kocher, Levin Buchmann, Zubi Zuberbühler (C), Nika Burri, Emiel Uunks

Prediction: Not a bad team, who could and should be comfortable top ten. Unlikely to repeat their surprise third place finish last time out - their highest ever league placing.

St. Bernadine Accountants
Manager: Lenny Dähler

Disciplinarian ex-dentre half and borderline psychopath Dähler lit a fire under this rather average Bean Counter team last season and pushed them into fifth place, quite against the odds. Can the nervous energy of having him on your back sustain into another season of overachievement, can captain Sebastian Bettler and the fancy-dan Ipanemans, Arpinho and Sedinho, bewitch opposition into thinking they are really good, or will the fear factor turn stale leaving the under-invested Accountants exposed for what they really are - mundane?

First XI: Simon Ochsner, Arpinho (IPN), Nolan Kägi, Pirmin Kellersberger, Serdinho (IPN), Leonardo Ruggli, Sebastian Bettler (C), Dooil Kaye (BSE), Orell Speich, Livio Lieber, Jurrien Holtsingel

Prediction: With several teams getting better, Lenny Dähler's boys are likely to get found out and fall back into the pack around mid-table.

OSA
Manager: Magnus Rüfenacht

Managed by the other Rüfenacht brother - Hänggi is in charge of Shakerssen - The Rifles were less of a surprise package last season, narrowly avoiding a relegation play-off in an underwhelming show for the arms factory team. But Magnus, like his brother, is proving an astute head coach, bringing though promising youngsters Lourens Kamperman and Huub Weterink while the club have signed Christiaan van der Riet from Orchideeën, an ambitious transfer which suggests the club are not content to struggle against the drop.

First XI: Chiel Schreiers (C), Flip Castaing, Lourens Kamperman, Albert Wiegemink, Huug Alders, Giel Ossenkoppele, Ewoud Noppers, Sibren Kwappert, Joris Giskes, Huub Weterink, Christiaan van der Riet

Prediction: Should be better than they have of late, should put the relegation worries behind them, should push on. Should.

St. Bernadine Amateur
Manager: Manuel Rolli

The Gentlemen Footballers had a moderately good season under Manuel Rolli last time out, finishing 7th. While there was a time when the club could aspire to greatness and sometimes achieved it, that feels like quite a while ago and just holding on to a top flight place rates as an achievement these days. This season the manager will look to his son Niklas to bang in the goals that will keep them there - he's been a bit part player for a couple of seasons, but after losing main striker Jvars Greber to BSN he steps up to the First XI.

First XI: Alessio Hirschi (C), Maxime Hug, Rayan Schiefer, Hias Ramseyer, Ethan Felber, Azwu Zaman (BBS), Neil Lützelschwab, Jason Bolliger, Tell Wäch, Uto Lippuner, Niklas Rolli, Souaïbou Mukongo (ZEN)

Prediction: Losing Greber was a blow which will make this season harder than last. Could get drawn in to the relegation battle, certainly won't be much above it.

De Tike FC
Manager: Rudie Mellema

Turning to veteran captain and club legend Rudie Mellema to take on a player-manager role last season with the retirement of long-standing leader Wouter de Vlogt, the Clockwork Blue & Orange overtook their three big northern rivals to win the second tier in the critical season when the Oranji clubs would be permitted back into the top flight after their ban. It was a surprise appointment that paid off in spades. Attacking Makongolese midfielder Éric Tsukulu was the star performer and will be needed in a season of consolidation back in the top flight.

First XI: Maup Phiffers, Jurrijn op Sonnebeld, Klaas-Jan Rechterschot, Jos Uilken, Ton Masseus, Rudie Mellema (C), Niek Mooiers, Éric Tsukulu (MAK), Eelco Siero, Christiaan Scholte Meijerink, Dan ten Tije

Prediction: De Tike FC have been away a long time and unlike Kozakken Boys, who they beat to the second tier title, they will likely need a period of adjustment before they can hope to compete at the top. Immediate relegation should not be a concern, but 12th of 16 ought to be seen as mission accomplished.

Hauser & Kofel
Manager: Isaac Voelman

The Mariners are the very personification of 'making up the numbers'. The ship-building works team may rule the waves, but on the green green grass of the Merzbergerstadion they have failed to be exciting for as long as anyone can remember.

First XI: Henk-Jan Stender, Cyriaque Authement (MUS), Remko Geerlings, Yves Dia (MAK), Thies Nijzink (C), Jeroen Egberts, Earl Kynance (BSE), Ko Olthuis, Christiaan Schopman, Jessie Akuchi (MAK), Chiel Hulst

Prediction: Probably not bad enough to go down, H&K will nevertheless not be far away from that struggle.

Stadler Works
Manager: Anaïs Aescher

The Burners are going to struggle after a few seasons in mid-table simply because their squad is a little - maybe a lot - on the lean side in terms of quality. What makes for an interesting season though is the bold move by the Städeli family, who own the company and the team, is the appointment this season of the SteuerLigen's first and so far only female head coach in Anaïs Aescher. She has moved from 2nd team manager to the main job after impressing in charge, and will be hoping not to have a relegation on her record for this most historic of seasons.

First XI: Gianin Schilling, Kevin Neuwirth, Theo Greber, Toni Gretler, Uto Kuhn, Ramun Friedrich, Abi Lobsiger, Enno Siebold, Timo Ellenberger, Gabriele Zuber, Alessio Rotach

Prediction: No doubt about it, the Burners will struggle. Young Timo Ellenberger is one to watch, although if he has a really good season, he'll probably be moved on to FC Städeli. But a 19-year old isn't going to keep this team up, and Anaïs Aescher may not either.

McCunnald
Manager: Gerrit Hannes

Finished last season outside of the relegation play-off spots only on goal difference. The Clowns have not been able to reinforce particularly well and this year they may not scrape through, as joint favourites for the drop.

First XI: Bart Nijkels, Florens Klein Stroek, Bastijn Elshof, Berg Voske, Toon Oenema, Sieb Ponsteen, Maas Geerling, Albert Holleman, Valentijn van der Scheer, Steef Verboom, Willem Eggengoor

Prediction: Perhaps not as bad as MAG, probably no better than anyone else - which leaves them looking relegation play-offs squarely in the chops. With Oranji teams queueing to get back in the division, they wouldn't stand a chance.

MAG
Manager: Nelis Fijnewever

Fijnewever is a very exciting young coach who should have a brilliant career ahead of him in management. But an artist is only as good as his palette, and this one doesn't have much to work with. Avoiding the drop with a relegation play-off win against Beath SSC last season only seems to have delayed the inevitable.

First XI: Steef van 't Roth, Henk Schutte, Alfredo Neves (IPN), Dries Tijsselink, Laurens Boevink, Klaas-Jan Wullink, Maas Kwappert, Benson Rubi, Rik Dam, Bonaventure Richard (MUS), Ard Elbersen

Prediction: The Busmen will be on new routes next season as they navigate their way through the lower division, having been relegated this season. Without a doubt.

National Abbreviations

BSE Bonesea		DLT Delte
HVM Hvammstang		IPN Ipanema
MAK Makongo		MUS Mustardy
TAM Tamarindia		TEQ Tequilo
WGT Wight			ZEN Zenega

by **Taxhavn** » Sun Oct 29, 2023 6:26 am

Season Review Part 1
Season '89: OffenLig

Naturally, no battleplan survives past kick-off in the first match of the season.

ROUND 1
   St. Bernardine Amateur 2-2 Kozakken Boys
St. Bernadine Accountants 1-1 De Tike VF
   St. Bernadine Athletic 4-4 McCunnald
                      OSA 1-3 Stadler Works
                      FZK 2-1 Raven Thöni
               Shakerssen 1-2 FC Städeli
                      BSN 0-1 Hauser & Kofel
                      MAG 2-4 Standard Lily

ROUND 2
               De Tike VF 1-1 St. Bernardine Amateur
                McCunnald 1-2 Kozakken Boys
            Stadler Works 3-3 St. Bernadine Accountants
              Raven Thöni 4-2 St. Bernadine Athletic
               FC Städeli 1-0 OSA
           Hauser & Kofel 1-1 FZK
            Standard Lily 1-0 Shakerssen
                      MAG 2-0 BSN

ROUND 3
   St. Bernardine Amateur 5-3 McCunnald
               De Tike VF 2-4 Stadler Works
            Kozakken Boys 0-1 Raven Thöni
St. Bernadine Accountants 2-2 FC Städeli
   St. Bernadine Athletic 1-1 Hauser & Kofel
                      OSA 2-2 Standard Lily
                      FZK 2-4 MAG
               Shakerssen 1-0 BSN

ROUND 4
            Stadler Works 2-2 St. Bernardine Amateur
              Raven Thöni 4-0 McCunnald
               FC Städeli 2-8 De Tike VF
           Hauser & Kofel 1-0 Kozakken Boys
            Standard Lily 1-1 St. Bernadine Accountants
                      MAG 2-6 St. Bernadine Athletic
                      BSN 1-1 OSA
               Shakerssen 5-6 FZK

ROUND 5
   St. Bernardine Amateur 2-4 Raven Thöni
            Stadler Works 0-0 FC Städeli
                McCunnald 1-0 Hauser & Kofel
               De Tike VF 0-0 Standard Lily
            Kozakken Boys 3-1 MAG
St. Bernadine Accountants 0-2 BSN
   St. Bernadine Athletic 2-3 Shakerssen
                      OSA 6-4 FZK

A 1-2 reverse in the first match of the season at FZK leaves reigning champions Raven Thöni disappointed and everyone wonders if the All Blacks are up for a good title defence. Four wins in a row after that and they are top, a place they will hardly relinquish all season, and the question marks are pretty much erased. Stadler Works and Hauser & Kofel have great starts but it is early days and a long hard slog awaits. H&K's opening win of the season at BSN is the surprise of the day and reflects a poor start for the Greenbacks who struggle to recover. Newly promoted De Tike FC's stunning 8-2 win at FC Städeli on matchday 3 puts Frigates' veteran manager Bendicht Saxer in the lead in the early season sack race, while Nelo Holzer at Standard Lily, knowing he had to deliver a stirling start, is at least unbeaten, though three uninspiring draws in a row has certainly raised eyebrows. Athletic's new Deltic strike partnership of Cerotha and Mastorqa have settled nicely and all indications are for a high yield from them - but at the other end Athletic look all over the place and it's a pretty poor start for one of the title favourites.

Top
    Team                           P  W  D  L  GF  GA  GD Pts
  1 Raven Thöni                    5  4  0  1  14   6  +8  12
  2 Stadler Works                  5  2  3  0  12   8  +4   9
  3 Standard Lily                  5  2  3  0   8   5  +3   9
  4 Hauser & Kofel                 5  2  2  1   4   3  +1   8
  5 FC Städeli                     5  2  2  1   7  11  -4   8

Bottom
 12 St. Bernadine Athletic         5  1  2  2  15  14  +1   5
 13 OSA                            5  1  2  2  10  11  -1   5
 14 BSN                            5  1  1  3   3   5  -2   4
 15 St. Bernadine Accountants      5  0  4  1   7   9  -2   4
 16 McCunnald                      5  1  1  3   9  15  -6   4

ROUND 6
               FC Städeli 0-2 St. Bernardine Amateur
           Hauser & Kofel 2-8 Raven Thöni
            Standard Lily 1-0 Stadler Works
                      MAG 0-1 McCunnald
                      BSN 0-1 De Tike VF
               Shakerssen 0-0 Kozakken Boys
                      FZK 1-4 St. Bernadine Accountants
                      OSA 0-1 St. Bernadine Athletic

ROUND 7
   St. Bernardine Amateur 1-2 Hauser & Kofel
               FC Städeli 2-1 Standard Lily
              Raven Thöni 3-0 MAG
            Stadler Works 2-1 BSN
                McCunnald 1-2 Shakerssen
               De Tike VF 0-1 FZK
            Kozakken Boys 2-0 OSA
St. Bernadine Accountants 6-1 St. Bernadine Athletic

ROUND 8
            Standard Lily 3-0 St. Bernardine Amateur
                      MAG 4-0 Hauser & Kofel
                      BSN 4-0 FC Städeli
               Shakerssen 2-3 Raven Thöni
                      FZK 1-0 Stadler Works
                      OSA 7-2 McCunnald
   St. Bernadine Athletic 2-1 De Tike VF
St. Bernadine Accountants 0-4 Kozakken Boys

ROUND 9
   St. Bernardine Amateur 0-4 MAG
            Standard Lily 1-0 BSN
           Hauser & Kofel 2-1 Shakerssen
               FC Städeli 4-1 FZK
              Raven Thöni 0-1 OSA
            Stadler Works 0-6 St. Bernadine Athletic
                McCunnald 0-4 St. Bernadine Accountants
               De Tike VF 4-4 Kozakken Boys

ROUND 10
                      BSN 7-1 St. Bernardine Amateur
               Shakerssen 4-1 MAG
                      FZK 2-1 Standard Lily
                      OSA 1-1 Hauser & Kofel
   St. Bernadine Athletic 1-0 FC Städeli
St. Bernadine Accountants 0-1 Raven Thöni
            Kozakken Boys 2-0 Stadler Works
               De Tike VF 1-0 McCunnald

Individual headlines in the first third of the season have gone to Raven forward Valentin Fey, 21, who has been sensational for the All Blacks as they tighten their grip on the league in pursuit of a successful title defence. Fey has eight goals already to his name and four assists, and hit a hatrick in the eight-goal mauling of Hauser & Kofel. As the season begins to take shape in earnest, newly promoted Kozakken Boys are flying the flag for the rehabilitated Oranji teams, while the Deltic strike pairing at Athletic are steadily guiding 'The Honours' into the top sphere of influence as second top scorers in the league after Raven. But outright favourites BSN have been shocking, and if manager Reto Ehrensperger hadn't been Reto Ehrensperger, he would've been sacked by now. Even Reto Ehrensperger isn't going to last all season unless the Greenbacks drastically improve. A 7-1 hammering of St. Bernardine Amateur in week 10 probably saved his job and suggests there is a recovery on the cards. At the bottom, The Clowns are surely living up to their name and billing as favourites for the drop. In most games they haven't been too far behind, but cumulatively, they are struggling.

Top
    Team                           P  W  D  L  GF  GA   GD Pts
  1 Raven Thöni                   10  8  0  2  29  11  +18  24
  2 Kozakken Boys                 10  5  3  2  19  10   +9  18
  3 Standard Lily                 10  5  3  2  15   9   +6  18
  4 St. Bernadine Athletic        10  5  2  3  26  21   +5  17
  5 FZK                           10  5  1  4  21  26   -5  16

Bottom
 11 OSA                           10  3  3  4  19  17   +2  12
 12 MAG                           10  4  0  6  20  23   -3  12
 13 Stadler Works                 10  3  3  4  14  19   -5  12
 14 BSN                           10  3  1  6  15  10   +5  10
 15 St. Bernardine Amateur        10  2  3  5  16  28  -12   9
 16 McCunnald                     10  2  1  7  13  29  -16   7

ROUND 11
   St. Bernardine Amateur 0-0 Shakerssen
                      BSN 4-3 FZK
                      MAG 1-3 OSA
            Standard Lily 1-5 St. Bernadine Athletic
           Hauser & Kofel 3-0 St. Bernadine Accountants
               FC Städeli 4-4 Kozakken Boys
              Raven Thöni 7-0 De Tike VF
            Stadler Works 0-1 McCunnald

ROUND 12
                      FZK 0-2 St. Bernardine Amateur
                      OSA 0-0 Shakerssen
   St. Bernadine Athletic 2-1 BSN
St. Bernadine Accountants 3-1 MAG
            Kozakken Boys 2-0 Standard Lily
               De Tike VF 3-1 Hauser & Kofel
                McCunnald 0-5 FC Städeli
            Stadler Works 0-4 Raven Thöni

ROUND 13
   St. Bernardine Amateur 1-4 OSA
                      FZK 0-3 St. Bernadine Athletic
               Shakerssen 0-0 St. Bernadine Accountants
                      BSN 2-4 Kozakken Boys
                      MAG 5-0 De Tike VF
            Standard Lily 4-2 McCunnald
           Hauser & Kofel 0-1 Stadler Works
               FC Städeli 0-1 Raven Thöni

ROUND 14
   St. Bernadine Athletic 0-0 St. Bernardine Amateur
St. Bernadine Accountants 2-1 OSA
            Kozakken Boys 4-1 FZK
               De Tike VF 1-1 Shakerssen
                McCunnald 2-2 BSN
            Stadler Works 0-2 MAG
              Raven Thöni 1-1 Standard Lily
               FC Städeli 2-0 Hauser & Kofel

ROUND 15
   St. Bernardine Amateur 1-0 St. Bernadine Accountants
   St. Bernadine Athletic 3-1 Kozakken Boys
                      OSA 0-3 De Tike VF
                      FZK 3-1 McCunnald
               Shakerssen 2-1 Stadler Works
                      BSN 2-2 Raven Thöni
                      MAG 1-7 FC Städeli
            Standard Lily 6-2 Hauser & Kofel

Halfway
Season '89

Hardly off the top all season, Raven Thöni look well on course for a second successive championship, losing only twice in the first half of the season, outscoring everyone and looking absolutely rock solid at the back. If Valentin Fey is getting all the headlines for the glamourous end of the pitch, plaudits must surely be showered on the defence and captain Ebi Hummel in particular, who is having the season of his career. Youngster Töbe Aerle, 17, looks twice that age alongside him in his debut season. But if there is one cloud on the horizon it could well be St. Bernadine Athletic, who after a slow start have hit solid form to close within 5 points of the All Blacks, ensuring they won't have it all their own way. A brilliant 5-1 away at Standard Lily in week 11 was the catalyst for their impressive form, but it cost Nelo Holzer his job at the Pollen Counters as the first casualty of the season. Interim manager Adam Ackeret was brought in to steady the ship and has done precisely that, losing one - at Kozakken in his first game in charge - and taking two wins with a vital draw at Raven in his next three. But Lily are 10 points off the top now and they are working hard to get someone more experienced in to try to recover something from a season of such high hopes.

Could that be Reto Ehrensperger? Pre-season favourites BSN waited until week 14 to follow suit, when they finally lost patience with Ehrensperger after a dismal draw at McCunnald. They worked quickly to pull in briefly unemployed Nelo Holzer, who has formerly won the SteuerLigen with Standard, and he guided the team to a creditable draw against Raven in his first game in charge. Maybe a straight swap of managers is on the cards. Unbelievably, BSN remain in the relegation play-off places as the season moves into the second half. Worthy of note is the performance this season of MAG, hotly tipped by just about everyone to finish bottom, but the Tequiloan-owned works team coached by young prospect Nelis Fijnewever have exceeded all expectations to lie only a couple points adrift of the top six.


    Team                            P   W  D  L  GF  GA   GD Pts
  1 Raven Thöni                    15  11  2  2  44  14  +30  35
  2 St. Bernadine Athletic         15   9  3  3  39  24  +15  30
  3 Kozakken Boys                  15   8  4  3  34  20  +14  28
  4 Standard Lily                  15   7  4  4  27  21   +6  25
----------------------------------------------------------------
  5 FC Städeli                     15   7  3  5  31  26   +5  24
  6 St. Bernadine Accountants      15   5  5  5  26  22   +4  20
  7 Shakerssen                     15   5  5  5  22  20   +2  20
  8 De Tike VF                     15   5  5  5  26  29   -3  20
  9 OSA                            15   5  4  6  27  24   +3  19
 10 FZK                            15   6  1  8  28  40  -12  19
 11 MAG                            15   6  0  9  30  36   -6  18
 12 Hauser & Kofel                 15   5  3  7  17  30  -13  18
 13 St. Bernardine Amateur         15   4  5  6  20  32  -12  17
----------------------------------------------------------------
 14 BSN                            15   4  3  8  26  23   +3  15
 15 Stadler Works                  15   4  3  8  16  28  -12  15
 16 McCunnald                      15   3  2 10  19  43  -24  11

In the second tier, the two favourites to compete for the title and automatic promotion have found their season severely disrupted by an unexpected package. VF Romainring have come from nowhere to dominate SteuerLig-2, racing five points clear at the top and throwing down an unexpected challenge to Orchideeën and Tijhuis Archimedes, who surely expected to be fighting only amongst themselves for honours. Behind the three of them, Axis look best of the rest but it already looks highly unlikely that the top three can be breached. At the bottom, Merzberg look so out of their depth that finishing last looks guaranteed, and the worry will be that with re-election the name of the game for the bottom team, if they look too far short of the standard required for the division they may lose their place. It could take years to win it back.


    Team                            P   W  D  L  GF  GA   GD Pts
  1 VF Romainring                  15  12  2  1  51  15  +36  38
  2 Orchideeën                     15  10  3  2  40  16  +24  33
  3 Tijhuis Archimedes             15  11  0  4  33  15  +18  33
-----------------------------------------------------------------
  4 Axis Driessche                 15   8  2  5  25  22   +3  26
  5 Urban Irminger                 15   7  4  4  24  16   +8  25
  6 Beath SSC                      15   8  1  6  23  23   +0  25
  7 Benson Foxes                   15   7  2  6  20  21   -1  23
  8 1860 Delénacht                 15   5  5  5  22  19   +3  20
  9 Löwen Bessandorf               15   5  5  5  22  25   -3  20
 10 Achille Oranjestadt            15   6  2  7  21  29   -8  20
 11 HPV                            15   5  2  8  22  19   +3  17
 12 Schwänenclub                   15   5  2  8  23  30   -7  17
 13 Immenmold                      15   4  4  7  21  29   -8  16
 14 Roterlicht Knokschäft          15   4  3  8  23  37  -14  15
 15 Tulip Maartenstadt             15   2  3 10  20  44  -24   9
----------------------------------------------------------------
 16 VF Merzberg                    15   0  2 13  10  40  -30   2

by **Taxhavn** » Mon Oct 30, 2023 2:25 am

Season Review Part 2
Season '89: EndeLig

If you have the ball you must make the field as big as possible. If you don’t have the ball you must make it as small as possible.

ROUND 16
            Kozakken Boys 4-1 St. Bernardine Amateur
               De Tike VF 1-4 St. Bernadine Accountants
                McCunnald 3-4 St. Bernadine Athletic
            Stadler Works 4-0 OSA
              Raven Thöni 2-1 FZK
               FC Städeli 0-3 Shakerssen
           Hauser & Kofel 2-4 BSN
            Standard Lily 6-1 MAG

ROUND 17
   St. Bernardine Amateur 2-0 De Tike VF
            Kozakken Boys 3-3 McCunnald
St. Bernadine Accountants 3-1 Stadler Works
   St. Bernadine Athletic 3-0 Raven Thöni
                      OSA 2-1 FC Städeli
                      FZK 0-1 Hauser & Kofel
               Shakerssen 0-2 Standard Lily
                      BSN 1-0 MAG

ROUND 18
                McCunnald 1-1 St. Bernardine Amateur
            Stadler Works 0-4 De Tike VF
              Raven Thöni 2-0 Kozakken Boys
               FC Städeli 2-0 St. Bernadine Accountants
           Hauser & Kofel 2-2 St. Bernadine Athletic
            Standard Lily 7-0 OSA
                      MAG 3-1 FZK
                      BSN 1-2 Shakerssen

ROUND 19
   St. Bernardine Amateur 1-6 Stadler Works
                McCunnald 1-3 Raven Thöni
               De Tike VF 1-0 FC Städeli
            Kozakken Boys 6-2 Hauser & Kofel
St. Bernadine Accountants 0-0 Standard Lily
   St. Bernadine Athletic 4-1 MAG
                      OSA 1-2 BSN
                      FZK 8-1 Shakerssen

ROUND 20
              Raven Thöni 2-1 St. Bernardine Amateur
               FC Städeli 1-0 Stadler Works
           Hauser & Kofel 0-1 McCunnald
            Standard Lily 7-0 De Tike VF
                      MAG 3-2 Kozakken Boys
                      BSN 3-1 St. Bernadine Accountants
               Shakerssen 0-0 St. Bernadine Athletic
                      FZK 1-0 OSA

The All-Blacks extend their lead at the top despite losing heavily at St. Bernadine Athletic, who certainly have posted intent to offer the main challenge to a successful title attempt. Two away draws has cost them a little ground but their Deltic strikers are still scoring for fun. Speaking of scoring for fun, Standard Lily under interim manager Adam Ackeret have hit a six and two sevens in five matches to turn their season around and will consider themselves still in contention. Reto Ehrensperger, the veteran professor sacked by BSN, was expected to take up the reins there but Standard have decided to stick with a winning formula. Hasuer & Kofel, after a strong start to the season, find themselves in trouble and with Reto hanging around, the temptation to change is too strong to resist - after a home defeat in week 20 to bottom-feeders McCunnald, Isaac Voelman receives his marching orders and Reto Ehrensperger passes him going in through the rotating door.

Top
    Team                            P   W  D   L  GF  GA   GD Pts
  1 Raven Thöni                    20  15  2   3  53  20  +33  47
  2 St. Bernadine Athletic         20  12  5   3  52  30  +22  41
  3 Standard Lily                  20  11  5   4  49  22  +27  38
  4 Kozakken Boys                  20  10  5   5  49  31  +18  35
  5 FC Städeli                     20   9  3   8  35  32   +3  30

Bottom
 12 OSA                            20   6  4  10  30  39   -9  22
 13 Hauser & Kofel                 20   6  4  10  24  43  -19  22
 14 Stadler Works                  20   6  3  11  27  37  -10  21
 15 St. Bernardine Amateur         20   5  6   9  26  45  -19  21
 16 McCunnald                      20   4  4  12  28  54  -26  16

ROUND 21
   St. Bernardine Amateur 5-3 FC Städeli
              Raven Thöni 3-1 Hauser & Kofel
            Stadler Works 0-2 Standard Lily
                McCunnald 1-0 MAG
               De Tike VF 1-2 BSN
            Kozakken Boys 3-5 Shakerssen
St. Bernadine Accountants 0-4 FZK
   St. Bernadine Athletic 5-2 OSA

ROUND 22
           Hauser & Kofel 2-1 St. Bernardine Amateur
            Standard Lily 1-1 FC Städeli
                      MAG 3-3 Raven Thöni
                      BSN 0-1 Stadler Works
               Shakerssen 1-0 McCunnald
                      FZK 0-3 De Tike VF
                      OSA 4-1 Kozakken Boys
   St. Bernadine Athletic 0-2 St. Bernadine Accountants

ROUND 23
   St. Bernardine Amateur 2-4 Standard Lily
           Hauser & Kofel 1-1 MAG
               FC Städeli 2-1 BSN
              Raven Thöni 3-0 Shakerssen
            Stadler Works 0-3 FZK
                McCunnald 0-0 OSA
               De Tike VF 0-1 St. Bernadine Athletic
            Kozakken Boys 1-3 St. Bernadine Accountants

ROUND 24
                      MAG 3-1 St. Bernardine Amateur
                      BSN 2-1 Standard Lily
               Shakerssen 4-1 Hauser & Kofel
                      FZK 2-4 FC Städeli
                      OSA 2-1 Raven Thöni
   St. Bernadine Athletic 1-1 Stadler Works
St. Bernadine Accountants 2-1 McCunnald
            Kozakken Boys 3-0 De Tike VF

ROUND 25
   St. Bernardine Amateur 0-1 BSN
                      MAG 0-1 Shakerssen
            Standard Lily 5-1 FZK
           Hauser & Kofel 0-0 OSA
               FC Städeli 3-3 St. Bernadine Athletic
              Raven Thöni 0-0 St. Bernadine Accountants
            Stadler Works 1-3 Kozakken Boys
                McCunnald 2-8 De Tike VF

Three consecutive defeats for the over-achieving Kozakken Boys leaves them adrift and out of the title race after an excellent first season back, while Shakerssen, against all odds, are making a late play to match their surprise third place of last season, and with it a potential IFCF place. But the title race looks like a one to three-horse race; Raven have had a couple of wobbles but neither Athletic or Lily are able to capitalise. This looks like the All-Blacks title to lose, but the other two, kicking themselves now that their slow starts have cost them dearly at the sharp end of the season, could still make it a squeeze if they show some resilience. At the bottom end McCunnald look punch-drunk and ready to drop, while a Triple-A team really could be facing a first ever drop out of the top flight as Amateur's terrible season continues.

Top
    Team                            P   W  D   L  GF  GA   GD Pts
  1 Raven Thöni                    25  17  4   4  63  26  +37  55
  2 St. Bernadine Athletic         25  14  7   4  62  38  +24  49
  3 Standard Lily                  25  14  6   5  62  28  +34  48
  4 Kozakken Boys                  25  12  5   8  60  44  +16  41
  5 Shakerssen                     25  11  6   8  39  38   +1  39

Bottom
 12 MAG                            25   9  2  14  45  57  -12  29
 13 Hauser & Kofel                 25   7  6  12  29  52  -23  27
 14 Stadler Works                  25   7  4  14  30  46  -16  25
 15 St. Bernardine Amateur         25   6  6  13  35  58  -23  24
 16 McCunnald                      25   5  5  15  32  65  -33  20

ROUND 26
               Shakerssen 2-3 St. Bernardine Amateur
                      FZK 1-4 BSN
                      OSA 1-1 MAG
   St. Bernadine Athletic 1-2 Standard Lily
St. Bernadine Accountants 2-2 Hauser & Kofel
            Kozakken Boys 3-0 FC Städeli
               De Tike VF 0-1 Raven Thöni
                McCunnald 3-4 Stadler Works

ROUND 27
   St. Bernardine Amateur 1-4 FZK
               Shakerssen 1-4 OSA
                      BSN 3-3 St. Bernadine Athletic
                      MAG 0-1 St. Bernadine Accountants
            Standard Lily 6-1 Kozakken Boys
           Hauser & Kofel 2-0 De Tike VF
               FC Städeli 5-2 McCunnald
              Raven Thöni 1-1 Stadler Works

The run-in begins here, and Standard Lily are coming up on the outside with two wins, including away at Athletic, to move into second. They chip a point off Raven's lead who are disappointed to be held at home by strugglers Stadler Works. Tow defeats for Shakerssen puts them out of the IFCF picture, while FC Städeli and BSN - revived under Nelo Holzer - make an unlikely late push for involvement. Kozakken Boys 1-6 defeat at Lily is a massive dent going into the final three games, and they might lose out altogether.

Top
    Team                            P   W  D   L  GF  GA   GD Pts
  1 Raven Thöni                    27  18  5   4  65  27  +38  59
  2 Standard Lily                  27  16  6   5  70  30  +40  54
  3 St. Bernadine Athletic         27  14  8   5  66  43  +23  50
  4 Kozakken Boys                  27  13  5   9  64  50  +14  44
  5 St. Bernadine Accountants      27  11  8   8  44  37   +7  41
  6 FC Städeli                     27  12  5  10  53  49   +4  41
  7 BSN                            27  12  4  11  50  38  +12  40

Bottom
 12 Hauser & Kofel                 27   8  7  12  33  54  -21  31
 13 MAG                            27   9  3  15  46  59  -13  30
 14 Stadler Works                  27   8  5  14  35  50  -15  29
 15 St. Bernardine Amateur         27   7  6  14  39  64  -25  27
 16 McCunnald                      27   5  5  17  37  74  -37  20

ROUND 28
                      OSA 2-1 St. Bernardine Amateur
   St. Bernadine Athletic 4-0 FZK
St. Bernadine Accountants 0-2 Shakerssen
            Kozakken Boys 3-2 BSN
               De Tike VF 1-5 MAG
                McCunnald 1-2 Standard Lily
            Stadler Works 4-1 Hauser & Kofel
              Raven Thöni 2-1 FC Städeli

All three contenders secure victories and that puts Raven Thöni just one win away from the title - and next they go to Havn to play Standard. That will be a must win for Lily to keep them in with a chance of an unlikely last-minute title steal. Despite a purposeful victory at home to FZK, Athletic are out of the title race. Kozakken Boys steadied their nerves to see out a thrilling 3-2 home win over BSN to all but secure the fourth IFCF spot - the top three already assured some additional football next season - with a number of teams needing some kind of miracle to catch the top four. At the bottom, McCunnald are relegated after home defeat to Standard, Amateurs are confirmed as relegation play-off participants, and Anaïs Aescher's Stadler Works leapfrog a couple of places toward safety after a big win over Hauser & Kofel.

Top
    Team                            P   W  D   L  GF  GA   GD Pts
  1 Raven Thöni                    28  19  5   4  67  28  +39  62
  2 Standard Lily                  28  17  6   5  72  31  +41  57
  3 St. Bernadine Athletic         28  15  8   5  70  43  +27  53
  4 Kozakken Boys                  28  14  5   9  67  52  +15  47
  5 Shakerssen                     28  12  6  10  44  45   -1  42
  6 St. Bernadine Accountants      28  11  8   9  44  39   +5  41
  7 FC Städeli                     28  12  5  11  54  51   +3  41

Bottom
 12 Stadler Works                  28   9  5  14  39  51  -12  32
 13 De Tike VF                     28   9  5  14  45  58  -13  32
 14 Hauser & Kofel                 28   8  7  13  34  58  -24  31
 15 St. Bernardine Amateur         28   7  6  15  40  66  -26  27
 16 McCunnald                      28   5  5  18  38  76  -38  20

ROUND 29
   St. Bernardine Amateur 4-1 St. Bernadine Athletic
                      OSA 3-2 St. Bernadine Accountants
                      FZK 3-0 Kozakken Boys
               Shakerssen 4-0 De Tike VF
                      BSN 2-3 McCunnald
                      MAG 1-0 Stadler Works
            Standard Lily 4-1 Raven Thöni
           Hauser & Kofel 4-2 FC Städeli

The title race goes to the final day as Standard Lily smash Raven Thöni in what would've been their title match if they could only avoid defeat. Zenegalese strikers Natanaël Tanga and Jenson Masuka have been brilliant in the second half of the season, thriving under reserve coach and interim manager Adam Ackeret, and they came to the table here full of intent. A brace each in the 4-1 rout gives them a real chance - but Raven entertain a disappointing BSN in their final game knowing a win will seal their title come what may. The only other issue to be decided is fourth place, and with the Boys going down heavily at FZK as they run out of steam, Shakerssen take advantage to move within two points. At the bottom three teams will fight to avoid joining St. Bernadine Amateur in the relegation play-off, and you have to say De Tike FC's catastrophic loss of form has them as most likely. They could be going straight back down.

Top
    Team                            P   W  D   L  GF  GA   GD Pts
  1 Raven Thöni                    29  19  5   5  68  32  +36  62
  2 Standard Lily                  29  18  6   5  76  32  +44  60
  3 St. Bernadine Athletic         29  15  8   6  71  47  +24  53
  4 Kozakken Boys                  29  14  5  10  67  55  +12  47
  5 Shakerssen                     29  13  6  10  48  45   +3  45

Bottom
 12 Hauser & Kofel                 29   9  7  13  38  60  -22  34
 13 Stadler Works                  29   9  5  15  39  52  -13  32
 14 De Tike VF                     29   9  5  15  45  62  -17  32
 15 St. Bernardine Amateur         29   8  6  15  44  67  -23  30
 16 McCunnald                      29   6  5  18  41  78  -37  23

ROUND 30
St. Bernadine Accountants 0-1 St. Bernardine Amateur
            Kozakken Boys 1-2 St. Bernadine Athletic
               De Tike VF 4-2 OSA
                McCunnald 2-1 FZK
            Stadler Works 1-1 Shakerssen
              Raven Thöni 2-3 BSN
               FC Städeli 1-1 MAG
           Hauser & Kofel 1-1 Standard Lily



    Team                            P   W  D   L  GF  GA   GD Pts
  1 Raven Thöni                    30  19  5   6  70  35  +35  62 IFCF Champions League
  2 Standard Lily                  30  18  7   5  77  33  +44  61 IFCF Challenger's Cup
  3 St. Bernadine Athletic         30  16  8   6  73  48  +25  56 IFCF Challenger's Cup
  4 Kozakken Boys                  30  14  5  11  68  57  +11  47 IFCF Challenger's Cup
  5 Shakerssen                     30  13  7  10  49  46   +3  46
  6 BSN                            30  13  4  13  57  46  +11  43
  7 FC Städeli                     30  12  6  12  57  56   +1  42
  8 St. Bernadine Accountants      30  11  8  11  46  43   +3  41
  9 OSA                            30  11  7  12  50  55   -5  40
 10 MAG                            30  11  4  15  53  61   -8  37
 11 FZK                            30  12  1  17  58  70  -12  37
 12 De Tike VF                     30  10  5  15  49  64  -15  35
 13 Hauser & Kofel                 30   9  8  13  39  61  -22  35 
 14 Stadler Works                  30   9  6  15  40  53  -13  33 Relegation Play-Off
 15 St. Bernardine Amateur         30   9  6  15  45  67  -22  33 Relegation Play-Off
 16 McCunnald                      30   7  5  18  43  79  -36  26 Relegated

Raven Thöni retain the title in the most tense of circumstances as they lose at home to BSN, but Standard Lily cannot come up with the winning goal in Merzberg against Reto Ehrensperger's Mariners, Hauser & Kofel themselves fighting to avoid a place in the relegation play-off and building a brick wall to deny the Pollen Counters a win, and the title. It's a similar story for the fourth place spot, where Kozakken Boys are beaten at home by third-placed Athletic, but Shakerssen cannot take advantage with a draw at Stadler Works. De Tike FCs win at home to OSA means the Works are caught in the final play-off place and will face St. Bernadine Amateur in a straight fight to stay in the division.

In SteuerLig-2, Orchideeën prevailed to win the title and secure a return to the top flight of one of the true greats of Taxhavn football after an enforced absence of six seasons. Their rivals Tijhuis Archimedes will have to go again, facing down surprise package VF Romainring in the other play-off. Two Oranji promotions for the second season in a row looks on the cards.



    Team                         P   W  D   L  GF  GA   GD Pts
  1 Orchideeën                 30  18   7   5  76  36  +40  61	IFCF Liga-B Champions Trophy; Promoted
  2 Tijhuis Archimedes         30  19   2   9  65  35  +30  59	IFCF Liga-B Champions Trophy; Promotion Play-Off
  3 VF Romainring              30  17   6   7  77  43  +34  57	IFCF Liga-B Champions Trophy; Promotion Play-Off
  4 1860 Delénacht             30  13  11   6  60  38  +22  50
  5 Benson Foxes               30  15   4  11  52  39  +13  49
  6 HPV                        30  14   5  11  50  38  +12  47
  7 Urban Irminger             30  13   6  11  52  45   +7  45
  8 Beath SSC                  30  13   6  11  53  51   +2  45
  9 Axis Driessche             30  12   7  11  52  61   -9  43
 10 Schwänenclub               30  10   9  11  49  52   -3  39
 11 Achille Oranjestadt        30  12   2  16  49  72  -23  38
 12 Immenmold                  30   9   7  14  43  60  -17  34
 13 Löwen Bessandorf           30   8   9  13  46  55   -9  33
 14 Roterlicht Knokschäft      30   9   6  15  51  65  -14  33
 15 Tulip Maartenstadt         30   6   5  19  40  81  -41  23 
 16 VF Merzberg                30   4   4  22  42  86  -44  16	Re-elected

Promotion/Relegation Play-Offs

     Stadler Works 2-0 St. Bernadine Amateur @ Städeli Arena, Städeli
Tijhuis Archimedes 0-1 VF Romainring @ Oranjestadt Arena, Tijhuis

Promotion/Relegation Final
@ The Athletic Club, St. Bernadine

St. Bernadine Amateur 2-0 VF Romainring

by **Taxhavn** » Thu Nov 02, 2023 5:49 am

Transfer Ticker
All The Moves... mostly

Raven Thöni

Despite being the league's top scorers, signed two forwards on frees from international transfer window - 
Bruce Googewarf, 30, (BRO) from Coolville United (CBP)
Blaz Kovacec, 18, (MYT) from Lok. Cassia (prospect)

Forward Gillis Würsten, 27, made available for transfer to make room; signed by newly-promoted Orchideeën
Forward Isak Eberhard, 24, to compete to win his place back as starter

Young midfield starlet Luis Glücki, 21, signs new 5-season contract
Winger Franklin von Gunten fails to agree extension 

Prospect defender Töbe Aerle's negotations break down and he puts in a transfer request; 
moves to St. Bernadine Athletic for a domestic record $1m

Coming in to replace him, for an international transfer record ($1.5m) -
DC Bors Warwick (NPH), 33, from Kirkenes FC in Kelssek.

============

Standard Lily

Interim manager Adam Ackeret given 2-year contract as full manager

Signings from international transfer window, all frees:
Free-kick expert LB Zhang Zhenxin (YZH), 30, from Nangang Nanyue
CB Chance Benton (GRU), 31, from Marketville (EUR) 
ST Mere Eljas Faliri (FFD), 24 - from Lithico[TM] weirdness, made highest paid player in club history

Casualties making way:
DL Othmar Zesiger, 28; signed for De Tike FC (undisclosed)
DC Ricardo Bürkli, 31, on the last year of his contract, signed for Stadler Works
ST Jenson Masuka (ZEN), 29, a surprise release

Fellow Zenegalese striker Natanaël Tanga signs three season renewal

============

FC Städeli
Big changes and money changing hands...

Manager Bendicht Saxer fired at end of season, replaced by Quebecois -
Bradley Kemerer-Lascelles (BKL), 54, previously of Columbia City

He immediately raids the striken Audioslav league for some of the lower-rated and older players;

First international paid transfers in SteuerLig are:
MC Lothaire Cromwell (NPH), 35, from AC Izotz Zubia for almost $1m
ST Martim Picasso (PFA), 34, from KT Itzalovalle for 500k

also Xannerian GK Ivan Klank, 26, from Destin Easterners for 1.1m making them the big spenders in the window

And not content with that, a free transfer:
ML Tanica Darr Qib 'iithli (GEE), 37, from OK Offtsutare who will take up the captaincy

DC Sanno Walder signs two-season contract extension

Veteran keeper Filippo Wyler, 37, in last year of contract, expected to retire, drops to second choice behind Klank

============

St. Bernadine Athletic

Manager Pirmin Wägeli moves quickly to secure want-away young starlet:
DC Töbe Aerle, 18, becomes first $1m domestic player, moving from Raven Thöni
DC Paschalis Kopp, 25, is listed to make space, moves to Hauser & Kofel

International free transfer, one for the future:
Forward Carloto Desmonceaux, 18, (GVN) from Akademiezh Mell-Droad Gouvanarch

Keeper Tim Speich, 29, signs a new 4-season deal;
Deltic striker Tai Cerotha, 25, signs a 2-season extension
Captain Lorian Germann announces retirement at the end of the coming season 

============

St. Bernadine Accountants

Manager Lenny Dähler, who has a year to run on his contract, will not be offered an extension at this time.

Meanwhile DL Arpinho of Ipanema gets a one-year extension.
Striker Livio Lieber, 35, announces retirement at end of season.

International free transfer -
Defensive midfielder Erroneous Null, 23, from QAFAcademy (QAD)

Attacking midfielder Dooil Kaye (BSE), 24, is released at the end of his contract.

============

St. Bernadine Amateur

Will be deducted 8 points for fielding an ineligible player - Souaïbou Mukongo (ZEN) - for much of last season. 
[Suspended on appeal for 3 seasons]

Manager Manuel Rolli, 62, leaves by mutual consent as the Amateur look for a refresh.
Former FC Städeli manager and SteuerLig winner Bendicht Saxer, also 62, is that man.

DM Azwu Zaman (BBS), 38, announces retirement at end of coming season.

Striker Uto Lippuner, 22 signs a two season contract extension
Young starlet and son of the ex-boss Niklas Rolli, 19, signs a new five season deal 

Sea Domer ST Amblix, 21, signs on a free from Independent Students SC

============

BSN

DC Mildore Clarke (BSE), 37, and MR Hiltin Lier, 35 both announce they will retire at the end of the season

International free transfer -
GK Alimayu Shiben (SRS), 32, from Olympia Arkintoofle
OSA captain and keeper Chiel Schreiers, 30, was favourite for the spot after declining a new contract 
and now finds himself looking for another club

Big news domestic free transfer -
ST Paulie Morf, 30, signs a two season deal after leaving FZK at the end of his contract
Morf joins Jvars Greber, 23, in what looks like it could be one of the most potent attacks in the division

============

FZK

A poor season for The Barrell Rollers in the lower half of SteuerLig-1 has cost Wightling coach Horatio Limit, 62, his job 

FZK look even further afield to sign on Sea Domer Koordinator Satripy as the second female coach in the division. 
What's more, at 32, she is the youngest manager in the league.

Two international free transfers based on her knowledge immediately follow - 
youngsters Tsujii (CCO), a centreback from Corporate University Sharks (CC1) 
and Hicarna (MSD), a striker from Revolucion Academy (MSD) both aged 20 will drop straight into her starting line-up.

Equally young defender Irksome Smith (BSE), 20, brought in by the previous manager, is left fighting for his place in the back four.


============

Kozakken Boys

Key contract renewals are the order of the day -
Highly-rated manager Dan Stappenbelt, 50, agrees a one-season extension to his contract.
DC Lennaert Vrielink, 29, club captain, signs a new 5-season contract.

International free transfer:
GK, Morten Gallis (AUP), 20, is brought in from Noechatel Athletike after his contract was cancelled. 
Rumours of discontent abound. He will initially sit as back-up to veteran Mustardo Prosper Lapierre, 39 as his presumed successor.

DR Gert-Jan Drioel, 37, announces he will retire at end of the season.

============

Shakerssen

GK Mark Rüegger, 29, signs new 4-season contract
Young DC Rätus Bur, 20, extends by 3 seasons

Exciting youth prospect Jocki Moroff, 20, is promoted straight into the first XI, 
leaving another young left winger, Andrae Kocher, 19, fighting for his place after a good first season himself.

============

OSA

Club captain and GK Chiel Schreiers, 28, left at the end of his contract to sign for Stadler Works.

Starlet Lourens 'VW' Kamperman, DR, 19, placed on transfer list after declining contract extension, 
snapped up by newly-promoted Orchideeën

Contract renewals for young DM Giel Ossenkoppele, 17, and ST Joris Giskes, 22; 
but DC Huug Alders, 40, will play his final season before retiring 
and ML Ewoud Noppers, 30, not offered a new contract with his expiring at the end of the season. 

OSA are looking to academy prospect Gert-Jan Steffens, 20, to step up into his place.

Sea Domer DL Vaulto, 19, signed on a free from North Xuelei Mongoose Academy 


============

De Tike FC

Savojarnan DC Jan Svärd, 33, signed from FK Metall Jarnstad on a free and appointed captain

DL Othmar Zesiger, 28; signed from Standard Lily to add experience at the back 
17-year-old Jurrijn op Sonnebeld will remain as backup.

DR Klaas-Jan Rechterschot, 23, and DC Jos Uilken, 31, sign new 4- and 3-year contracts respectively

MR Dan ten Tije, 38, announces retirement plan for the end of the season


============

Hauser & Kofel

GK, Henk-Jan Stender, 30, extends contract to season-93 
Mustardo DL Cyriaque Authement, 28, declines to extend and will leave on a free at the end of the season

DC Paschalis Kopp, 25, signed for undisclosed fee from St. Bernadine Athletic
AM Benson Rubi, 22, signed for free from MAG
Ko Althius, 35, will step down to backup AM before retiring at the end of the season.


============

Stadler Works

DC Riccardo Bürkli, 31, signed from Standard Lily, undisclosed fee along with Zenegalese ST Jenson Masuka, 29

MR Alessio Rotach, 21, signed new contract for four seasons

GK Gianin Schilling, 36, and DL Kevin Neuwirth, 35, both announce retirements at the end of the season

GK Chiel Schreiers, 28, signed on a free from OSA


============

MAG

Starlet AM Joris van Berkum, 20, promoted from youth academy on 3-year contract and expected to slot straight into the starting XI 
to replace Benson Rubi, 22 (released)

ST Rik Dam, 24, signs new four year deal


============

Orchideeën

Major moves to strengthen ahead of a return to the top flight:

ST Gillis Würsten, 27, signed from Raven Thöni (undisclosed)
DR Laurens 'V.W.' Kamperman, 19, signed from OSA (undisclosed)
DM Hirune Afmadu, 34, (SRS) signed on a free from Olympia Arkintoofle (SRS)
ML Christian Lange-Parker, 23, (SNL) signed on a free (unaffiliated)
Sea  Domer DLR (FB) Victoriano van Alst, 21, signed on a free from Eastern University (CC1) to play in the DL slot

GK Diederick Booij, 25, wins new contract for four seasons after winning SteuerLig-2 golden glove

by **Taxhavn** » Mon Jan 15, 2024 5:39 am

Season Preview
Season '90*

*With no agreed universal or multiversal calendar, and the Isle working on multiple calendars itself due to its various critical connections around the worlds, football uses the UICA calendar to keep track of historical data - though there has never been a time when the leagues entered the international club competitions until now. Further, to avoid confusion following the changeover to IFCF and restarting the count, UICA timekeeping is still applied with the new IFCF time appended in some records.

Title Contenders: Standard Lily, St.Bernadine Athletic, BSN
IFCF Challengers: Raven Thöni, Shakerssen, FC Städeli
Best Of The Rest: Kozakken Boys, Orchideeën, MAG
Look Out, Fellas: St. Bernadine Accountants, St. Bernadine Amateur, FZK, De Tike FC
Its Two of Three: Hauser & Kofel, Stadler Works, OSA

Star players bolded.
Betting odds supplied by KickAdviser™

Head Coach: Jovin Strähl

Last season: Champions

First XI: Ramon Buck, Ebi Hummel (C), Adrien Burkhard, Bors Warwick [NPH], Urban Preisig, Laurin Laurer, Franklin von Gunten, Luis Glücki, Bruce Hoogewarf [BRO], Blaz Kovacec [MYT], Valentin Fey

Prediction: Searching for a third consecutive title - which would be a third consecutive surprise - the All Blacks have strengthened again in anticipation of having to balance the Champions League, albeit probably for about five minutes, with domestic duties. The capture of Nephari Bors Warwick from Kirkenes FC in Kelssek for a SteuerLig record fee is a coup which has impressed many, but replacing the top two strikers in the league last season with young exotic-sounding foreign prospects seems a bit risky. Many think Raven's unlikely champions form ends here.

Betting: 73.0 / 5th

Manager: Adam Ackeret

Last season: Runners-Up

First XI: Fiete Dällenbach, Zhang Zhenxin [YZH], Friedolin Spiess, Nando Balsiger, Chance Benton [GRU] (C), Rafael Dorer, Jules Reimann, Raul Kopp, Natanaël Tanga [ZEN], Mere Eljas Faliri [FFD], Res Zweifel

Prediction: A strong finish after a poor start last time got head coach Nelo Holzer the sack and his assistant Adam Ackeret a promotion from interim to the permanent gig. Like Raven, the Pollen Counters have strengthened from abroad, but unlike Raven, this looks like a solid improvement all round. Watch out especially for Farv striker Mere Eljas Faliri from Lithico™ - is it a club? is it a country? is it... what is it, exactly? As at the start of last season, Standard will be favourites for a record 11th SteuerLig title.

Betting: 82.6 / 1st

Manager: Pirmin Wägeli

Last season: 3rd

First XI: Tim Speich, Raul Inäbnit, Lorian Germann (C), Vincent Aury [MUS], Töbe Aerle, Samuel Hodel, Earl Kynance [BSE], Ramun Kunz, Danny Mastorqa [DLT], Tai Cerotha [DLT], Daniel Bösch

Prediction: A strong finish after a poor start got Pirmin Wägeli a bigger budget and he swooped for young starlet Töbe Aerle, 18, the former Raven centrehalf. Will Wägeli also be credited as the man who professionalised Deltic football? Spotting an opportunity no-one else seems to have cottoned on to (except Rülândéá Kôstä in Farfadillis) the Honoursmen have snaffled up two strikers from the WCC top-twenty rated national team Delte in Tai Cerotha and Danny Mastorqa, both on free transfers. They surely won't be the last. It makes this team a strong favourite to contend again for the title, if they can hit the ground running.

Betting: 79.6 / 2nd

Manager: Dan Stappenbelt

Last season: 4th

First XI: Prosper Lapierre [MUS], Reinout ten Cate, Gert-Jan Drioel, Florens Wiechers, Lennaert Vrielink (C), Jurian van Enk, Saturnin Barrios [TAM], Floris-Jan Veldhuis, Guus Mensink, Eduardo Mendoza [TAM], Stefaan Beldman

Prediction: Last season's surprise IFCF qualifiers have opted not to change a thing on the basis of 'if it ain't broke, don't fix it', with contract renewals for their highly-rated manager and several key players the order of the day. Could they have done with a little injection of new energy? Probably. Its unlikely they will make intercontinental football again this season, though they will still be a tough nut for anyone to crack.

Betting: 71.1 / 6th

Manager: Hänggi Rüfenacht

Last season: 5th

First XI: Mark Rüegger, Linard Geissbühler, Machiel Foekers, Nino Brawand, Rätus Bur, Lorin Müngers, Jocki Moroff, Levin Buchmann, Zubi Zuberbühler (C), Nika Burri, Emiel Uunks

Prediction: Shakerssen came so close to a surprise place in the IFCF slots last time around, the Removers banking on their homegrown stars of Foekers, Müngers and Uunks to shake up the natural order of things. They'll go again this season, adding only another of their young stars in the highly-rated Jacki Moroff to the first team, and they should be competitive too under veteran coach Hänggi Rüfenacht. A first IFCF qualification is not beyond them.

Betting: 61.8 / 10th

Manager: Nelo Holzer

Last season: 6th

First XI: Alimayu Shiben [SRS], Weinert Marggi (C), Idrissa Konat [MAK], Mildore Clarke [BSE], Federico Kaufmann, Alessandro Kislig, Enno Eggen, Federicho Rütschi, Paulie Morf, Jvars Greber, Hiltin Lier

Prediction: By their own standards, the Greenbacks were a complete let-down last season and it cost coach Reto Ehrensperger his job. Fellow 'sackee' Nelo Holzer, the first to fall in the sack race last season at Standard Lily was quickly hired and after a slow start, certainly turned the team around for a strong finish in an otherwise poor season. The smart capture of striker Pauli Morff from FZK and a first dip in the international market for Squornish keeper Alimaye Shiben look like good moves and BSN must surely challenge for the title this time out.

Betting: 76.3 / 4th

Manager: Bradley Kemerer-Lascelles (BKL) [QUE]

Last season: 7th

First XI: Ivan Klank [XAN], Gabriel Neumeister, Josif Rothacher, Sanno Walder, Guy Kòsi [ZEN], Linard Sutter, Tanica Darr Qib 'iithli [GEE] (C), Lothaire Cromwell [NPH], Aaron Brechbühler, Martim Picasso [PFA], Till Haid

Prediction: The Frigates are another of the big sides that underperformed last time out, and they have gone for a massive rebuild with the mountains of cash at their disposal. Former coach Bendicht Saxer was not trusted to manage that project and was ousted in a managerial coup with Städeli opting for Quebecois Bradley Kemerer-Lascelles, lured with a big salary. Immediately raiding the striken Audioslav league for no less than four foreign signings, he brings nous to the international transfer market. But the transition from mediocre might be too much in a single season, so look for an IFCF-placed challenge this time around, and a tilt the big one next year.

Betting: 77.2 / 3rd

Manager: Lenny Dähler

Last season: 8th

First XI: Simon Ochsner, Arpinho [IPN], Nolan Kägi, Pirmin Kellersberger, Serdinho [IPN], Erroneous Null [QAD], Sebastian Bettler (C), Edwin Markozy [ZRH], Orell Speich, Livio Lieber, Jurrien Holtsingel

Prediction: Despite deep pockets and great skill at cooking the books, the Bean Counters are in the doldrums at the moment and nothing Lenny Dähler does seems to change that. So this season he's opted to do nothing. Transfer activity was limited to one free signing in dubiously-named Qad, Erroneous Null (who sounds like he should be playing in the Sixteen Bit Primary Sixty-Four virtual league). Dähler already knows his contract will not be renewed at the end of the season, so it doesn't look like there could be much fight in the team. They will struggle.

Betting: 69.5 / 8th

Manager: Magnus Rüfenacht

Last season: 9th

First XI: Sâúl Râí [FFD] (C), Vaulto [MSD], Gabriel Abegglen [on loan], Albert Wiegemink, Huug Alders, Giel Ossenkoppele, Gert-Jan Steffens, Sibren Kwappert, Joris Giskes, Huub Weterink, Christiaan van der Riet

Prediction: OSA have the youngest squad in the top flight, and lost experienced team captain Chiel Schreiers at the end of his contract as well as their young starlet Lourens 'VW' Kampermann, snapped up by Orchideeën. Despite signing Sea Domer prospect Vaulto from the Mongoose Academy there are still big gaps in the squad with academy players and loanees expected to plug the holes. Could be a tough season for the Rifles.

Betting: 51.5 / 13th

Manager: Nelis Fijnewever

Last season: 10th

First XI: Steef van 't Roth, Henk Schutte, Alfredo Neves [IPN], Dries Tijsselink (C), Laurens Boevink, Klaas-Jan Wullink, Maas Kwappert, Joris van Berkum, Rik Dam, Bonaventure Richard [MUS], Ard Elbersen

Prediction: In Nelis Fijnwever, 39, the Busmen have one of the hottest properties in young coaches on the Isle, and last season overperformed with a mediocre squad to finish comfortably away from predicted relegation troubles. There are no big transfer moves but look out for new academy graduate Joris van Berkum, a midfielder with bags of potential. Another mid-table finish looks on the cards but MAG will have to offer Fijnwever something to build on if they are to keep hold of him.

Betting: 55.9 / 12th

Manager: Koordinator Satripy [MSD]

Last season: 11th

First XI: Sandro Tribelhorn, Lionel Benz (C), Christian Perreten, Uto Uhlmann, Tsujii [CCO], Jacinto Gempeler, Nino Fehlmann, Isaiah Gloyas [WGT], Oliver Heiniger, Hicarna [MSD], Simon Bessan

Prediction: The Barrell Rollers have been a rising force over the last two decades but that has never quite paid off in trophies, and suddenly last season they looked distinctly average. Cue the appointment of Koordinator Satripy, at 32 the youngest coach in the league. She's got a big job on her hands though - this is a team in decline. She moved quickly to secure two players she can count on from back home in Tsujii and Hicarna, but this is a rebuilding project that could take some time. A poor season looks likely.

Betting: 62.4 / 9th

Manager: Rudie Mellema

Last season: 12th

First XI: Maup Phiffers, Othmar Zesiger, Klaas-Jan Rechterschot, Jan Svärd (C) [SVK], Ton Masseus,Rudie Mellema, Niek Mooiers, Éric Tsukulu [MAK], Eelco Siero, Christiaan Scholte Meijerink, Dan ten Tije

Prediction: Last season's newly promoted Oranji club, De Tike FC did what was expected of them with just enough to stay in the division. They never really struggled, but they didn't set the world on fire. What next for the Clockwork Blue & Orange? Well they've got a Savojarnan defender in - Jan Svärd immediately takes over the captaincy - and he'll make a big difference. They could finish 11th...

Betting: 46.8 / 15th

Manager: Reto Ehrensperger

Last season: 13th

First XI: Henk-Jan Stender, Cyriaque Authement [MUS], Remko Geerlings, Paschalis Kopp, Thies Nijzink (C), Jeroen Egberts, Earl Kynance [BSE], Benson Rubi, Christiaan Schopman, Jessie Akuchi [MAK], Chiel Hulst

Prediction: Despite bringing in canny ex-BSN and SteuerLig-winning head coach Reto Ehrensperger, this is a poor team in a division that is getting stronger by the season. Nothing but struggle for the Mariners and they'll finish bottom by some distance. The only question will be who goes with them.

Betting: 39.2 / 16th

Manager: Anaïs Aescher

Last season: 14th

First XI: Chiel Schreiers, Kevin Neuwirth, Theo Greber, Toni Gretler, Riccardo Bürkli, Ramun Friedrich, Abi Lobsiger, Enno Siebold (C), Timo Ellenberger, Jenson Masuka [ZEN], Alessio Rotach

Prediction: The league's first female coach Anaïs Aescher had a tough season last time around and things are unlikely to change for the Burners, who as FC Städeli's second team probably shouldn't be holding a place in the top flight anyway. This season might be the one where they oblige, which is a shame for the highly-respected coach. They won't hang on to her if they go down. And they probably will go down.

Betting: 61.5 / 11th

Manager: Bendicht Saxer

Last season: 15th

First XI: Alessio Hirschi (C), Maxime Hug, Rayan Schiefer, Hias Ramseyer, Ethan Felber, Azwu Zaman [BBS], Neil Lützelschwab, Jason Bolliger, Tell Wäch, Amblix [MSD], Niklas Rolli

Prediction: It was a narrow escape for the Gentlemen Footballers last time out, by the skin of their pearly white teeth, but the only team of the Triple-A (Athletic, Accountants and Amateur) to have won a SteuerLig should've learned from that experience to have a better season this time out. Unlikely to be anything but a slog, they should at least avoid having to worry about the drop.

Betting: 48.3 / 14th

Manager: Gerrit Hannes

Last season: Promoted as SteuerLig-2 Champions

First XI: Diederick Booij, Victoriano van Alst [CCO], V.W. Kamperman, Egbert Stertjan, Laurens Seuper (C), Hirune Afmadu [SRS], Christian Lange-Parker [SNL], Reggy van Buiten, Gillis Würsten, Jeroen Blenkers, Harrie Arendsen

Prediction: Traditionally a competitive club at the top level and the Nurserymen have recruited from the international market to strengthen in their first season back after the 'Orange Referee' scandal and demotion. On top of that they managed a real coup in signing wantaway young OSA defender VW Kampermann, one of the best youngsters in the league. But after six seasons outside the elite of Taxhavn, it will take some adjustment for Gerrit Hannes and his team. Expect a decent season, but not yet amongst the pace-setters. It will come, surely.

Betting: 69.9 / 7th

Wightling Associations Abbreviations

BSE Bonesea		DLT Delte
HVM Hvammstang		IPN Ipanema
MAK Makongo		MUS Mustardy
TAM Tamarindia		TEQ Tequilo
WGT Wight		ZEN Zenega

by **Taxhavn** » Fri Jan 19, 2024 6:29 am

Season Review Part 1
Season '90 OffenLig to Round 10

For the first time in league history the top teams will have to contend with IFCF qualifying in the first third of the domestic season, with any group matches (unlikely) in the middle third of the season, along with FFI qualification matches. Any progress through to IFCF knockout stages will happen in the final third of the season along with the bulk of the FFI competition, if any teams get that far. It seems highly unlikely...

SteuerLig-1 Standings | Round-10

    Team                           P  W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 FZK                           10  6  3  1  19  10   +9  21
  2 BSN                           10  6  2  2  33  16  +17  20
  3 MAG                           10  6  0  4  15  14   +1  18
  4 Raven Thöni                   10  6  0  4  29  10  +19  18
  5 St. Bernadine Athletic        10  5  2  3  17  16   +1  17
  6 Kozakken Boys                 10  5  1  4  28  23   +5  16
  7 Orchideeën                    10  5  0  5  22  23   -1  15
  8 FC Städeli                    10  4  3  3  18  19   -1  15
  9 De Tike VF                    10  4  2  4  19  23   -4  14
 10 Shakerssen                    10  4  2  4  19  18   +1  14
 11 Standard Lily                 10  3  3  4  13  18   -5  12
 12 OSA                           10  2  4  4  11  16   -5  10
 13 St. Bernadine Accountants     10  2  4  4  13  16   -3  10
 14 Hauser & Kofel                10  3  1  6  17  32  -15  10
 15 Stadler Works                 10  2  2  6   7  19  -12   8
 16 St. Bernardine Amateur        10  2  1  7  14  21   -7   7

Sacked, Round 8:  Adam Ackeret, Standard Lily
Sacked, Round 10: Bendicht Saxer, St.Bernadine Amateur

SteuerLig-2 Leaders | Round-10

    Team                       P  W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 Tijhuis Archimedes        10  9  1  0  26   6  +20  28
  2 HPV                       10  6  3  1  25  14  +11  21
  3 1860 Delénacht            10  6  1  3  25  10  +15  19
  4 VF Romainring             10  5  2  3  28  13  +15  17
  5 Beath SSC                 10  5  2  3  22  19   +3  17
  6 Löwen Bessandorf          10  4  3  3  11  13   -2  15

It has been a blistering and wholly unexpected start for the Barrel Rollers, FZK, who take an early lead in the table ahead of title favourites BSN and surprise package MAG. Things will likely get harder for the impressive MAG if rumour is true that Standard Lily, who have endured a torrid OffenLig opening by their own standards, poach highly rated young coach Nelis Fijnewever from the Busmen. Because Standard are in the market again - for the second season in a row they have been the first to pull the trigger on their coach after a slow start, with Adam Ackaret getting his pink slip after eight rounds of football. At the time the Pollen Counters were 13th in the league, out of the IFCF Challengers Cup, and looking like their season was lost already. Ackaret is not unemployed for long though - a disastrous start for Bendicht Saxer at St. Bernadine Amateur sees him lose his job and Ackaret moves in to his still-warm seat to try to save things for the Gentlemen Footballers. Reigning champions Raven have had a spotty start too, dropping out of the Champions League, performing well in the Challengers Cup, and experiencing mixed results in the League. As expected, balancing all these commitments is proving a tough ask of coach Jovin Strähl.

Tijhuis Archimedes, favourites for promotion, make all the running in Lig-2, holding out to become the last unbeaten team in the SteuerLigen. HPV have surprised many with their good start, while 1860 and VF Romainring will expect to be there throughout to keep pace with the Owls at the top.

IFCF Qualifying Rounds

The first season of Inter-Regional football proves a tough ask of Raven Thöni in the Champions League as they fall at the first hurdle with two defeats to Elmish battlers Italia Mosfleet in the first qualifying round. But all is not lost as they come back strong, entering the Challengers Cup in the third qualifying round to cruise past KS Larantuka with their first interregional victory at home, an impressive 3-0 win. But better is to come, with the All Blacks stunning Strathcona Internationals of Kelssek 6-0 on aggregate, and following that up with a famous upset, winning 2-0 in Eura to knock former champions Ulsa out of the competition, to set up group stage football in their debut IFCF season. St. Bernadine Athletic and Standard Lily both show promise with wins in the Challengers Cup, and Standard reach the third qualifying round before defeat to Rozelle, despite impressing in both games.

In the Liga-B Champions Trophy, Lig-2 winners Orchideeën come within touching distance of the group stages before an exit in the play-off round to Chartistani opposition, leaving only Raven to carry SteuerLig hopes into IFCF group matches.

16th IFCF Champions League
Qualifying

First qualifying round
Champions path

(TAX)                       Raven Thöni    1–4    Italia Mosfleet                   (ELM)   0–2   1–2

16th IFCF Challengers Cup
Qualifying

First qualifying round

(TAX)            St. Bernadine Athletic    4–2    FC Inter Nantwich                 (TMB)   2–1   2–1 
(TAX)                     Kozakken Boys    1–5    FC Capri                          (VAL)   0–4   1–1 
(TAX)                     Standard Lily  p 2–2    Jaglan Royals                     (SRS)   1–2   1–0  (10–9 pen)

Second qualifying round

(TAX)                       Raven Thöni    6–2    Nilayam United                    (PCU)   4–1   2–1 
(TAX)            St. Bernadine Athletic    3–3 p  L'Unione                          (FFD)   2–2   1–1  (2–3 pen)
(TAX)                     Standard Lily    6–4    Meldrum Fall                      (SVI)   2–3   4–1

Third qualifying round

(TAX)                       Raven Thöni    6–3    KS Larantuka                      (SDG)   3–0   3–3  
(TAX)                     Standard Lily    2–4    Rozelle                           (BRE)   2–3   0–1

Fourth qualifying round

(TAX)                       Raven Thöni    6–0    Strathcona Internationals         (KSK)   3–0   3–0

Playoff round

(TAX)                       Raven Thöni    2–0    Ulsa                              (EUR)   0–0   2–0

16th IFCF Liga B Champions Trophy
Qualifying

Second qualifying round

(TAX)                     VF Romainring    1–2    TALON Touslander                  (AUP)   1–2   0–0

Third qualifying round

(TAX)                        Orchideeën  p 2–2    FC Solidarity Falkner             (BRE)   2–1   0–1  (3–2 pen)
(PIS)                  Scapa Bay Rovers    3–2    Tijhuis Archimedes                (TAX)   1–1   2–1

Playoff Round

(TAX)                        Orchideeën    1–3    Kill Bill                         (CHA)   1–1   0–2

Season '90 OffenLig to Round 20

SteuerLig-1 Standings | Round-20

    Team                           P  W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 Raven Thöni                    20  14  1   5  59  27  +32  43
  2 Standard Lily                  20  11  4   5  42  27  +15  37
  3 BSN                            20  11  4   5  63  39  +24  37
  4 Orchideeën                     20  11  0   9  42  42   +0  33
  5 MAG                            20  10  3   7  27  25   +2  33
  6 Kozakken Boys                  20  10  2   8  51  39  +12  32
  7 FC Städeli                     20   9  5   6  33  32   +1  32
  8 FZK                            20   8  6   6  34  29   +5  30
  9 St. Bernadine Athletic         20   7  6   7  31  36   -5  27
 10 De Tike VF                     20   8  2  10  39  39   +0  26
 11 Shakerssen                     20   6  5   9  35  31   +4  23
 12 Stadler Works                  20   6  5   9  30  41  -11  23
 13 St. Bernadine Accountants      20   5  6   9  33  42   -9  21
 14 OSA                            20   5  5  10  26  42  -16  20
 15 Hauser & Kofel                 20   5  4  11  27  57  -30  19
 16 St. Bernardine Amateur         20   4  2  14  31  55  -24  14

SteuerLig-2 Leaders | Round-20

    Team                       P  W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 Tijhuis Archimedes         20  15  2   3  48  21  +27  47
  2 HPV                        20  11  6   3  53  32  +21  39
  3 VF Romainring              20  12  3   5  55  30  +25  39
  4 1860 Delénacht             20  12  3   5  44  20  +24  39
  5 Axis Driessche             20   8  5   7  32  30   +2  29
  6 Löwen Bessandorf           20   8  4   8  34  36   -2  28

There are no more sackings but as expected Nelis Fijnewever switches from MAG to the mighty Standard Lily and sets to work immediately righting the stricken ship. Eight wins in ten games in charge puts the Pollen Counters back into familiar territory, and they overtake MAG on the way who don't look the same without their young leader. BSN have also been overtaken by Lily who now look like favourites for the title under Fijnewever, with only Raven Thöni standing in their way. Going well in the Challengers Cup, the All Blacks have found an extra gear to go top, in search of a third consecutive title. Early leaders FZK have faded badly, leaving coach Koordinator Satripy fighting for her job - people have short memories! They were dull as ditchwater last season, but with the Koordinator at the helm they have been anything but. She just needs time. That is something that may be in short supply for another foreign coach, with BKL - Bradley Kamerer-Lascelles - failing to ignite FC Städeli so far. But they are still not far from the critical IFCF places, so there is that.

There is little change in Lig-2 where pre-season favourites Tijhuis, after an early exit in IFCF competition, can focus on the league and maintain a healthy lead at the top. HPV, expected to fade away, refuse to do so.

IFCF Group Stages & FFI Qualifying

It's been a heavy workload for Raven and it showed, bowing out in the group stages of the Challengers Cup with a disappointing three home defeats. On the road they impressed, finishing unbeaten, but it wasn't enough to finish in third and extend their season in the Associations Trophy. Meanwhile victories for Raven and their rivals Standard and Athletic mean there will be more interregional football in the final third of the season as the FFI knockouts come to town. Not bad, for a first-year entry.

The 16th IFCF Challengers Cup

Group stage

   Group F                                      P  W  D  L  GF  GA  GD  Pts    Roz    WiT    SwA    RaT
1  Rozelle                                BRE   6  4  0  2  16  10   6  12      -     4-2    1-3    1-2  
2  Wirr Tsi                               CMT   6  3  1  2  13  11   2  10     2-3     -     2-1    1-1  
3  Swangard Athletic                      QUE   6  2  1  3  10  11  -1   7     1-3    1-3     -     2-2  
4  Raven Thöni                            TAX   6  1  2  3   6  13  -7   5     0-4    1-3    0-2     -

15th FFI League of Victors

Qualifying Round

(TAX)                Raven Thöni    3–2    SAVV Asakote               (TLW)   3–1   0–1 
(TAX)              Standard Lily    4–3    Mancodas City              (PFA)   2–2   2–1

15th FFI Confederations Trophy

Qualifying Round

(SAT)                   Tsear FC    3–4    St. Bernadine Athletic     (TAX)   0–4   3–0

by **Taxhavn** » Fri Jan 19, 2024 6:30 am

Season Review Part 2
Season '90: EndeLig

"Football is made of leather, leather comes from cows, cows like grass."

ROUND 21

              Raven Thöni 1-5 FZK
               De Tike VF 1-4 MAG
           Hauser & Kofel 2-3 OSA
            Stadler Works 1-0 St. Bernadine Accountants
   St. Bernardine Amateur 1-0 FC Städeli
               Orchideeën 7-2 BSN
            Standard Lily 3-1 Shakerssen
   St. Bernadine Athletic 0-1 Kozakken Boys

ROUND 22
                      MAG 3-0 Raven Thöni
                      OSA 0-1 FZK
St. Bernadine Accountants 2-2 De Tike VF
               FC Städeli 7-1 Hauser & Kofel
                      BSN 4-0 Stadler Works
               Shakerssen 1-2 St. Bernardine Amateur
            Kozakken Boys 1-3 Orchideeën
   St. Bernadine Athletic 1-1 Standard Lily

ROUND 23
              Raven Thöni 4-2 OSA
                      MAG 2-1 St. Bernadine Accountants
                      FZK 0-0 FC Städeli
               De Tike VF 1-3 BSN
           Hauser & Kofel 3-2 Shakerssen
            Stadler Works 4-2 Kozakken Boys
   St. Bernardine Amateur 0-2 St. Bernadine Athletic
               Orchideeën 1-2 Standard Lily

ROUND 24
St. Bernadine Accountants 0-1 Raven Thöni
               FC Städeli 3-1 OSA
                      BSN 5-0 MAG
               Shakerssen 4-4 FZK
            Kozakken Boys 4-0 De Tike VF
   St. Bernadine Athletic 1-1 Hauser & Kofel
            Standard Lily 2-2 Stadler Works
               Orchideeën 0-1 St. Bernardine Amateur
ROUND 25
              Raven Thöni 0-2 FC Städeli
St. Bernadine Accountants 0-2 BSN
                      OSA 2-5 Shakerssen
                      MAG 1-2 Kozakken Boys
                      FZK 2-5 St. Bernadine Athletic
               De Tike VF 1-6 Standard Lily
           Hauser & Kofel 0-3 Orchideeën
            Stadler Works 1-4 St. Bernardine Amateur

As we come into the final straight it looks like a three-horse race for the run-in. Who could possibly guess that BSN would lose all five of their final games and just scrape in to the Challenger's Cup last spot, completely falling apart. The principal beneficiary of that would be FC Städeli, finding good form to overhaul them into third place. But before all that, there would be a title to contend, with Raven and Standard going toe to toe until the very last. At the bottom, the Accountants had gone from disappointing to absolutely awful, with Lenny Dähler losing his job just five rounds before the end of his contract in what has become a standard joke of mismanagement by a board. Retiring striker Livio Lieber is put in charge for the final five games looking to overhaul Hauser & Kofel, OSA and the Amateur with time running out.

Top
    Team                            P   W  D   L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 Raven Thöni                    25  16  1   8  65  39  +26  49
  2 BSN                            25  15  4   6  79  47  +32  49
  3 Standard Lily                  25  14  6   5  56  33  +23  48
  4 Orchideeën                     25  14  0  11  56  48   +8  42
  5 FC Städeli                     25  12  6   7  45  35  +10  42
  6 MAG                            25  13  3   9  37  34   +3  42

Bottom
 11 De Tike VF                     25   8  3  14  44  58  -14  27
 12 Shakerssen                     25   7  6  12  48  45   +3  27
 13 St. Bernardine Amateur         25   8  2  15  39  59  -20  26
 14 OSA                            25   6  5  14  34  57  -23  23
 15 Hauser & Kofel                 25   6  5  14  34  73  -39  23
 16 St. Bernadine Accountants      25   5  7  13  36  50  -14  22

Sacked, Round 25: Lenny Dähler, St.Bernadine Accountants

ROUND 26

                      BSN 1-2 Raven Thöni
               Shakerssen 4-2 FC Städeli
            Kozakken Boys 0-0 St. Bernadine Accountants
   St. Bernadine Athletic 6-2 OSA
            Standard Lily 1-0 MAG
               Orchideeën 2-0 FZK
   St. Bernardine Amateur 2-2 De Tike VF
            Stadler Works 3-0 Hauser & Kofel

ROUND 27
              Raven Thöni 1-0 Shakerssen
                      BSN 0-3 Kozakken Boys
               FC Städeli 3-1 St. Bernadine Athletic
St. Bernadine Accountants 0-4 Standard Lily
                      OSA 2-0 Orchideeën
                      MAG 2-2 St. Bernardine Amateur
                      FZK 1-3 Stadler Works
               De Tike VF 5-1 Hauser & Kofel

BSN's shocking end of season collapse begins with a home defeat to defending champions and league leaders Raven Thöni - the All Blacks claiming victory with two late goals from Brook striker Bruce Hoogewarf. The Bean Counters then go on to lose 0-3 at home to Kozakken Boys in a shocking performance, the one that really signals what is to come for coach Nelo Holzer and his charges. Both Raven and Standard Lily win each round, Standard wiping out the Accountants who still wait for a first win in what seems like weeks at the foot of the table. Odds on survival get longer by the minute. Both Kozakken Boys and rivals Orchideeën, newly promoted, are showing well for IFCF places and big spenders FC Städeli are just about keeping pace heading into the final three games, although the title is now statistically beyond them.

Top
    Team                            P   W  D   L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 Raven Thöni                    27  18  1   8  68  40  +28  55
  2 Standard Lily                  27  16  6   5  61  33  +28  54
  3 BSN                            27  15  4   8  80  52  +28  49
  4 Orchideeën                     27  15  0  12  58  50   +8  45
  5 Kozakken Boys                  27  14  3  10  64  47  +17  45
  6 FC Städeli                     27  13  6   8  50  40  +10  45

Bottom
 11 De Tike VF                     27   9  4  14  51  61  -10  31
 12 Shakerssen                     27   8  6  13  52  48   +4  30
 13 St. Bernardine Amateur         27   8  4  15  43  63  -20  28
 14 OSA                            27   7  5  15  38  63  -25  26
 15 Hauser & Kofel                 27   6  5  16  35  81  -46  23
 16 St. Bernadine Accountants      27   5  8  14  36  54  -18  23

ROUND 28
            Kozakken Boys 0-1 Raven Thöni
   St. Bernadine Athletic 3-0 Shakerssen
            Standard Lily 4-0 BSN
               Orchideeën 3-2 FC Städeli
   St. Bernardine Amateur 1-4 St. Bernadine Accountants
            Stadler Works 4-0 OSA
           Hauser & Kofel 0-0 MAG
               De Tike VF 1-4 FZK

Only two are left standing heading into the last fortnight of the season - wins for Raven and Standard over contenders Kozakken Boys and BSN respectively eliminates those sides from title contention. One can't help looking at that final round and Raven's visit to Standard - will it be the title decider? BSN are thrashed 4-0 by the Pollen Counters and that leaves them looking utterly shell-shocked from a position of title contenders just three weeks prior. Orchideeën defeat FC Städeli to pull within a point of them but it is not enough to keep them in title contention. At the bottom the Accountants escape from relegation begins with a big win at Triple-A rivals Amateur, who will be pulled into the relegation battle, while De Tike FC and the disappointing Shakerssen finally confirm safety despite both suffering heavy defeats.

Top
    Team                            P   W  D   L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 Raven Thöni                    28  19  1   8  69  40  +29  58
  2 Standard Lily                  28  17  6   5  65  33  +32  57
  3 BSN                            28  15  4   9  80  56  +24  49
  4 Orchideeën                     28  16  0  12  61  52   +9  48
  5 Kozakken Boys                  28  14  3  11  64  48  +16  45
  6 FC Städeli                     28  13  6   9  52  43   +9  45

Bottom
 13 St. Bernardine Amateur         28   8  4  16  44  67  -23  28
 14 OSA                            28   7  5  16  38  67  -29  26
 15 St. Bernadine Accountants      28   6  8  14  40  55  -15  26
 16 Hauser & Kofel                 28   6  6  16  35  81  -46  24

ROUND 29
              Raven Thöni 4-1 St. Bernadine Athletic
            Kozakken Boys 0-0 Standard Lily
               Shakerssen 2-0 Orchideeën
                      BSN 1-2 St. Bernardine Amateur
               FC Städeli 5-3 Stadler Works
St. Bernadine Accountants 3-1 Hauser & Kofel
                      OSA 1-2 De Tike VF
                      MAG 0-2 FZK

Raven don't bat an eyelid in the penultimate round with a solid win that all but eliminates Athletic from inter-regional competition next season, a disappointment for them. Standard drop two points at Kozakken but it now seems a fair accompli that it would come down to their home game the following week against the reigning champions. BSN lose again as do Orchideeën, meaning the big winners in the chase for Challenger's Cup places is FC Städeli, who overcome their affiliate side Stadler Works in a cracker. They move up to fifth and only one point short of third with a winnable final tie at De Tike FC. Accountants home win over relegation rivals Hauser & Kofel eases their plight, although Amateur's surprise win at ailing BSN means they still look like they'll be facing a relegation play-off. The Mariners though are bottom and as predicted, look nailed on for the drop.

Top
    Team                            P   W  D   L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 Raven Thöni                    29  20  1   8  73  41  +32  61
  2 Standard Lily                  29  17  7   5  65  33  +32  58
  3 BSN                            29  15  4  10  81  58  +23  49
  4 Orchideeën                     29  16  0  13  61  54   +7  48
  5 FC Städeli                     29  14  6   9  57  46  +11  48
  6 Kozakken Boys                  29  14  4  11  64  48  +16  46

Bottom
 13 St. Bernardine Amateur         29   9  4  16  46  68  -22  31
 14 St. Bernadine Accountants      29   7  8  14  43  56  -13  29
 15 OSA                            29   7  5  17  39  69  -30  26
 16 Hauser & Kofel                 29   6  6  17  36  84  -48  24

ROUND 30
            Standard Lily 0-1 Raven Thöni
               Orchideeën 1-3 St. Bernadine Athletic
   St. Bernardine Amateur 1-1 Kozakken Boys
            Stadler Works 3-1 Shakerssen
           Hauser & Kofel 3-0 BSN
               De Tike VF 1-3 FC Städeli
                      FZK 1-1 St. Bernadine Accountants
                      MAG 5-1 OSA

Raven Thöni take a third title in a row, and their eighth overall, with a narrow win at Standard Lily to edge closer to their position as the most successful team of the SteuerLig era. In a much anticipated winner-takes-all encounter, the All Blacks silenced the nervous crowd with an early goal from teen Myt sensation Blaz Kovacec, seven minutes in. But a thriller this was not, both teams stymied by caution, and the crowning of a champion seemed somewhat underwhelming after poor fare. At the bottom there were more thrills as Hauser & Kofel thrashed managerless BSN, while OSA were themselves thrashed 5-1 at MAG to find themselves relegated on the last day of the season, a real turn up. For H&K it only delays the inevitable. Accountants will be kicking themselves that they could not get a winner at FZK, a result which would have put them above Amateur and saving them the worry of a relegation play-off.


    Team                            P   W  D   L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 Raven Thöni                    30  21  1   8  74  41  +33  64 IFCF Champions League
  2 Standard Lily                  30  17  7   6  65  34  +31  58 IFCF Challenger's Cup
  3 FC Städeli                     30  15  6   9  60  47  +13  51 IFCF Challenger's Cup
  4 BSN                            30  15  4  11  81  61  +20  49 IFCF Challenger's Cup
  5 Orchideeën                     30  16  0  14  62  57   +5  48 FFI Confederation's Trophy Play-Off
  6 Kozakken Boys                  30  14  5  11  65  49  +16  47 FFI Confederation's Trophy Play-Off
  7 MAG                            30  14  5  11  44  40   +4  47
  8 FZK                            30  12  9   9  54  46   +8  45
  9 St. Bernadine Athletic         30  12  8  10  54  51   +3  44
 10 Stadler Works                  30  12  6  12  54  60   -6  42
 11 De Tike VF                     30  10  4  16  55  69  -14  34
 12 Shakerssen                     30   9  6  15  55  54   +1  33
 13 St. Bernardine Amateur         30   9  5  16  47  69  -22  32 
 14 St. Bernadine Accountants      30   7  9  14  44  57  -13  30 Relegation Play-Off
 15 Hauser & Kofel                 30   7  6  17  39  84  -45  27 Relegation Play-Off
 16 OSA                            30   7  5  18  40  74  -34  26 Relegated

FFI Play-Offs
To extend the season and the chances of inter-regional football for more teams, the SteuerLig has interpreted FFI rules to allow a play-off system for qualification to the Confederations Trophy. With Ravën Thoni and Standard Lily once again qualified for the League of Victors, four teams will battle out for the right to play in the second FFI competition.

Play-Offs
               FC Städeli 1-0 Kozakken Boys
                      BSN 2-2 Orchideeën	
                            xt: 2-2 pens: 2-4

FFI Final Decider

               FC Städeli 0-2 Orchideeën

SteuerLig-2
Archimedes defeat in last season's promotion play-offs by VF Romainring did not deter them in a strong season, although there were a few nervous glances over their shoulder in the run-in as the Stoics made up some ground to push them close at the end. The Owls will be joined in the top division by 1860 Delénacht via the play-offs, and both teams will look forward to a return to the top flight. HPV, who surprised everyone by hanging in there until the last, finally fell short and miss out on


    Team                        P   W   D   L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 Tijhuis Archimedes         30  20   2   8  70  45  +25  62	IFCF Liga-B Champions Trophy; Promoted
  2 VF Romainring              30  19   4   7  79  44  +35  61	IFCF Liga-B Champions Trophy; Promotion Play-Off
  3 1860 Delénacht             30  18   4   8  62  34  +28  58	IFCF Liga-B Champions Trophy; Promotion Play-Off
  4 HPV                        30  17   7   6  74  46  +28  58
  5 Benson Foxes               30  13   5  12  50  48   +2  44
  6 Axis Driessche             30  12   8  10  52  46   +6  44
  7 Urban Irminger             30  12   7  11  42  41   +1  43
  8 Löwen Bessandorf           30  12   6  12  48  51   -3  42
  9 Beath SSC                  30  12   5  13  66  65   +1  41
 10 Schwänenclub               30  12   3  15  52  58   -6  39
 11 McCunnald                  30   8  11  11  42  51   -9  35
 12 VF Merzburg                30  10   4  16  52  55   -3  34
 13 Immenmold                  30   9   5  16  41  63  -22  32
 14 Tulip Maartenstadt         30   8   6  16  48  76  -28  30
 15 Roterlicht Knokschäft      30   7   7  16  33  56  -23  28 
 16 Achille Oranjestadt        30   7   4  19  41  73  -32  25	Re-elected

SteuerLig Promotion-Relegation Play-Offs
Often condsidered the biggest club never to have won anything, 1860 secured promotion at the expense of a ragged Hauser & Kofel team whose only achievement in a terrible season was to avoid automatic relegation. The drop via play-offs merely extended the pain in the eyes of the few company supporters that turned up to watch an often drab shambles at the Merzbergerstadion. For 1860, they will look to recent promotees to see that the higher level should not be beyond them next season - well supported, well managed and well resourced, they might even surprise a few.

Promotion/Relegation Play-Offs

[P] St.Bernadine Accountants 1-0 Hauser & Kofel @ Sept-Nat Stadion, St Bernadine
[R]            VF Romainring 2-2 1860 Delénacht @ de Romainring, Romainring District	
                               xt: 2-2 pens: 3-4

Promotion Final
@ The Athletic Club, St. Bernadine

Hauser & Kofel 0-1 1860 Delénacht

End of Season Awards

Golden Ball (Best Player): Bors Warwick (NPH), 33, Raven Thöni
Golden Boot (Top Scorer): Pauli Morf, 30, BSN, 21 goals
Golden Glove (Best Keeper): Fiete Dällenbach, 29, Standard Lily
Golden Visa (Best Foreigner): Bors Warwick (NPH), 33, Raven Thöni
Golden Blanket (Best Midfielder): Luis Glücki, 21, Raven Thöni
Golden Brick (Best Defender): Bors Warwick (NPH), 33, Raven Thöni
Golden Pram (Best Young Player): Blaz Kovacec (MYT), 18, Raven Thöni
Golden Stick (Best Veteran): Tanica Darr Qib 'iithli (GEE), 37, FC Städeli
Golden Tracksuit (Best Head Coach): Jovin Strähl, 51, Raven Thöni
Wooden Spoon (A Season To Forget): Magnus Rüfenacht, 40, head coach at OSA

FFI Competition

Any worries of end-of-season fixture pile-up were quickly assuaged in a disappointing end to the Isle's representation in the inter-regional competitions. Both Standard Lily and Raven Thöni exited the Challengers Cup in the round of sixteen without managing a win between them, while Athletic at least progressed through to the Quarters with a narrow and thrilling victory over KSS Sekongkang. But as they approached the sharp end of the competition they were comfortably dispatched by Chartistanis Champagne Night, the eventual competition runners-up, with two comprehensive defeats.

The 16th IFCF Challengers Cup

Round of Sixteen
(TAX)              Standard Lily    2–4    FTST                       (TRL)   2–3   0–1 
(TAX)                Raven Thöni    3–4    Jesper Torbensen           (TRL)   1–2   2–2

15th FFI League of Victors

Round of Sixteen
(TAX)     St. Bernadine Athletic    5–4    KSS Sekongkang             (TLW)   4–2   1–2 

Quarter-Final
(TAX)     St. Bernadine Athletic    2–7    Champange Night            (CHA)   1–3   1–4

by **Taxhavn** » Fri Jan 19, 2024 6:31 am

Off-Season Headlines
Season '91*

*With no agreed universal or multiversal calendar, and the Isle working on multiple calendars itself due to its various critical connections around the worlds, football uses the UICA calendar to keep track of historical data - though there has never been a time when the leagues entered the international club competitions until now. Further, to avoid confusion following the changeover to IFCF and restarting the count, UICA timekeeping is still applied with the new IFCF time appended in some records.

Reinomania & the Safehouse Controversy

In Taxhavn, as you might infer from the name, the guiding principles of a laissez-faire economy have recently been extended into the immigration realm with the announcement from FA-Tax, the overseeing instrument of Taxhavnite football, that former Vilitan footballers who have been deported from countries around the world and find themselves stateless, can now enjoy a safehouse in Taxhavn provided they sign for a team in the SteuerLig. This follows similar policy arrangements for Vilitan cocoabao farmers, ventriloquists, taxi drivers, mechanics and croupiers. A boat load of graphic designers are temporarily anchored in Havn Bay, waiting for their work permits, but the jury is still out on whether their portfolio is required on Trillionaire Island, as we like to call Taxhavn.

Intercontinental contenders and reigning champions Raven Thöni were the first to jump at the controversial opportunity, snapping up world class keeper Reino Koronen on a free transfer after his expulsion from Valanora and the cancellation of his contract at Soldarian FC. Seemingly with nowhere else to go and his home state government not willing or able to repatriate him, the sizeable Taxhavn Schilling was too much to turn down. Cue 'Reinomania' - the best player to ever step foot on the Isle*, let alone play there, had signed for the All-Blacks.

St. Bernadine Athletic were quick to follow with the signature of Ibini FC's former fullback Tero Alatalo, and then newly-promoted Tijhuis Archimedes, in the middle of strengthening for their return to the top flight after a long enforced absence over the Orange Referee Scandal, really spotted an opportunity and hooked no less than three Vilitans for their campaign. The Owls signed Riku Kasslin from Club ESF, Mikaela Äijälä from Brantislaven in the Squorns, and former national team winger Sami Samiii - wow, three i's in a row - sparking the slightly less contagious SamiSamiiMania. The Owls ultras are already working on the terrace song 'Sami Samiii, you've lost your address/Sami Samiii, your rep is a mess/Sami Samiii, you had to go/Nevermind, we love you so'. Catchy.

* [plenty of global superstars probably bank there though - not that anyone would willingly admit to it].

Naughty Boys

Only two seasons after their readmittance to the top flight, following a half-decade banning order for the Orange Referee Scandal, the Boys Club of Kierhuizen are in trouble again. An eagle-eyed auditor at FA-Tax, whilst playing the famous RL/FM sim game when she should've been working on her Vilitan footballer visa paperwork, spotted a surprising entry in the results feed and after a bit of investigation, came to the realisation that The Boys had stolen their club details from a fantasy team in the RL-sphere. A quick check of FA-Tax regulations confirmed that made up teams from the RL-sphere were not permitted to be imitated in the SteuerLig, and Kozakken Boys - 12 times champions - were an illegally registered club.

A few calls by the FA top brass to Boys Club owner Pier Spijkerhuis, the Taxhavnite sportscar manufacturer who went bust but somehow managed to buy a famous old football club, established not a lot. Mister Spijkerhuis claimed to have never heard of the RL-sphere (an unlikely story) and therefore could not imagine how Kozakken Boys came to be named after Kozakken Boys. He also claimed this would've happened about 112 years before he was born (very probably true) and therefore he could not be held responsible for purchasing an illegally-named club when even the FA didn't know until now it was an illegally-named club (fair point).

If there's one thing Taxhavnites fear more than dipping below a trillion in their current account, it's the thought of a compensation claim against them. The FA conceded it was a fair point, but after all, they didn't want to get into hot water with the IFCF, who would be furious that a team who had stolen the brand identity from a RL-sphere club had competed, albeit briefly, in a recent cycle of their competitions. Also they were worried about the RL-sphere administrators reaching out (or reaching in, to be more accurate) and starting their own litigation.

In order to best mitigate for any trouble ahead, FA-Tax had ruled that the best thing to do was punish. Punish hard, and punish quickly. To that end, they ruled against Boys Club. The club are to be ejected from the SteuerLig with immediate effect, and to remain excluded until such time as the prospect of litigation or even public admonishment had subsided to tolerably low levels or passed entirely. Partly that would mean an immediate change of name. Mister Spijkerhuis suggested Grasshoppers Zurich, Partizan Tirana, Dukla Prague and Carl Zeiss Jeina, providing increasingly ludicrous reasoning for each of these apparently random made-up names. FA-Tax counterproposed Kierhuizen FC, based on their home town, but were threatened with compensatory litigation by Kierhuizen FC, who said in a statement that they were shocked the FA seemed not to be aware of one of it's paid-up smaller member clubs who play in the ninth tier of the regional league.

With no name as yet agreed the Boys Club, as they are temporarily calling themselves, find themselves expunged from the league until further notice. Reorganisation to be announced by FA-Tax in a future bulletin.

One for money, two for... err... money, three for... yes, money

FA-Tax, the Taxhavnite football authority, announced three new developments in a press conference today which caught everyone in the press room at unawares as the attendees were expecting the usual lame excuses about why it was alright to grant visas to international criminals from Ao, and what to do with with RL-sphere rip-offs playing in the SteuerLig. True, there was some addressing of the latter issue, but it was three big surprises first.

Surprise number one: TaxPokal; the Tax Cup. In order to drive up revenues (because Taxhavn) the FA announced a thirty-two team knockout tournament featuring all the teams from the SteuerLig beginning with an unseeded draw and concluding with the TP final, from which would progress the winner with a nomination to the IFCF Cup Winners Cup. How tremendously exciting, except for the Boys Club of Kierhuizen who had been expelled from the thirty-two membership. The first tournament would happen in the coming season. In the future, the entry would be expanded gradually, with teams who finished lowest in the expanding league to compete in a preliminary round to the round of 32. Eventually the tournament would grow to 64, in line with surprise number two.

Surprise number two: Expansion. In order to drive up revenues (because Taxhavn) the FA announced a twenty-eight team expansion of the SteuerLig over a period of four seasons, to a total of 60 teams in three divisions of twenty. This would increase each of the two existing divisions from their present sixteen. The expansion would begin with a four-team expansion at the end of the coming season, so that in season 92 there would be two divisions of 18. A further four-team expansion would happen for the start of season 93, with two divisions of 20 teams. In season 94, a third division of twenty is to be added.

Consequently, there will be relegation of one team only from the first to second division at the end of the coming season with no relegation play-off. Three teams will be promoted from the second division, two automatically and one from a play-off of four teams. Four teams will be elected to the second division for the following season. This process will be repeated at the end of season 92. The addition of twenty teams for season 94 will include teams from further afield than Taxhavn, which has given away surprise number three.

Surprise number three: Multinationalism. In order to drive up revenues (because Taxhavn) the FA announced a multinational expansion of the SteuerLig - incorporating teams from nearby leagues deemed financially exciting enough to be part of the sixty-team, three division competition. There has been no word yet on who that will be and in the press conference the FA-Tax officials were suspiciously reticent, but confirmed places in the new twenty-team third tier would be on offer to identified clubs in the region.

And what of the Boys Club? FA-Tax have explained that they have a reserved place in the new third division providing they meet the requirements of not calling themselves Shepshed Dynamo, Sligo Rovers, Miami Tango or anything else from the RL/FM sim game - meaning they will be out of action for at least three seasons and will have to start from the bottom. In the meantime their expulsion means Hauser & Kofel, who lost the relegation play-off, will be reinstated to the first division, while the fourth member of St. Bernadine's Triple-A clique, St.Bernardine Academical, will be promoted immediately to the second division. This despite claims of nepotism and opaque decision-making from clubs such as St.Bernadine Architects, St.Bernadine Astronomical, St.Bernadine All-Stars, ASMV St.Bernadine, and St.Bernadine Asses, who all claim they were not consulted on the promotion.

Lapix Up

In what would surely have been the biggest headline in Taxhavn football any pre-season but this one, I'm rather embarrassed to announce in only the fourth article down the huge - I mean |<------- huge ------->| move by Standard Lily in the transfer market, signing Reçueçian wonderkid Laurent Lapix from forgotten Tequiloan powerhouse Resplendiente for a league record and transfer-window high 26 million spondoolicas. See - I told you they had money on the Isle. It's just a question of who wants it - Resplendiente certainly weren't going to say no to that kind of silly money and if Laurent was reluctant to move to a league full of veterans and Vilitan rejects, I'm sure an eyewatering salary would've taken care of any hesitation.

The last-minute signing by The Pollen Counters caught everyone by surprise, not least incumbent defensive midfielder and one of the league's best in Rafael Dorer, who surely didn't know he was likely to play second fiddle to a youngster when he himself is reaching the peak of his career. The timing couldn't be worse for Rafa, who has missed the chance to find himself an alternative posting and will face a season on the sidelines - though he has made begrudging noises about competition being good for everybody.

The late move was also outside the international transfer window, startling organisers at the IFCF and the FFI whose strict registration regulations will be tested to the limit by coach Nelis Fijnewever's sudden extra ammunition. The club believe they have done nothing wrong and the regulations are, in fact, more 'guidelines' than anything else, claiming to have searched for precedents of punitive action and confidently coming up short. And if there is one thing Taxhavn is good at, after banking, it's lawyering.

For young Laurent it all adds up to a mountain of pressure: the biggest fee in (and outside) of the transfer window a blatant show of cashmoney strength by the SteuerLigen; displacing one of the best midfielders in the business (locally, anyway); and a busload of Legalese poring over his contract and registration documents. Plus, the best foreign player to sign into the league (apart from those unmentionable Vilitans)? Well, maybe two World Cup winning strikers, who both scored in the final and play for St. Bernadine Athletic, will have something to say about that. Tai Cerotha and Danny Mastorqa have the medals, for sure. But now, Laurent Lapix has the price tag. The legitimisation of the league rests on him, with many hoping he is the start of an influx of stars.

Vilitans, Delts, a Farv, a Nepharan, a Quebecois coach, some people from the Sea Dome - and now, Laurent Lapix. Who could have imagined it?

by **Taxhavn** » Fri Jan 19, 2024 6:32 am

Season Preview
Season '91

Title Contenders: Raven Thöni, Standard Lily, FC Städeli
IFCF Challengers: BSN, St.Bernadine Athletic, Tijhuis Archimedes
Best Of The Rest: Orchideeën, FZK, Shakerssen, MAG
Look Out, Fellas: De Tike FC, St. Bernadine Accountants, St. Bernadine Amateur
Its One Of Three: 1860 Delénacht, Stadler Works, Hauser & Kofel

The Contenders

Looking for a successful title defence and balancing that against the demands of intercontinental club competitions certainly wasn't a problem for Raven Thöni last season, and they come into this one with the same set of challenges - and they've added a Vilitan goalkeeper, Reino Kononen, to help - cue Reinomania. Whatever the general outrage about signing the international pariahs of a failed Ao state, no-one in the SteuerLig is complaining about the extra quality they bring. It hardly seems likely anyone can stop the All-Blacks from making it a remarkable four titles in a row.

Except, maybe, Standard Lily. The Pollen Counters made their own statement late in preseason with the marquee signing of Reçuecan wonderkid Laurent Lapix from Resplendiente out in Tequilo - a statement that including going NS$1m over the transfer window '42 high just to prove they how much cash is washing around this little league. At NS$26m there is plenty of pressure on young Laurent to deliver the league's masterplan to make this money haven a respectable footballing destination and not just a taxwashing exercise. Not to mention the pressure to break Raven Thöni's grip on the league. Highly rated young coach Nelis Fijnwever might just have the man and boy management skills to help Laurent deliver on his undoubted promise.

Let's not imagine for one minute this is a two-horse title race, however. Quebecois coach Bradley Kemerer-Lascelles was brought in to make FC Stadëli an intercontinental force to be reckoned with, and while his first season was a steep learning curve in coaching in a poor-quality league, his influence will surely be felt now he's had some extra time under his belt. Only the lack of strong activity in the transfer market will concern fans a little, and with the oldest average aged squad in the league BKL will be disappointed not to have had the opportunity to rejuvenate - maybe next time. But The Frigates will still have a big say in the title race, for sure, and can look to stability and experience where they are lacking in marquee signings.

Favourite for the title: Raven Thöni

The Challengers

BSN under Nelo Holzer have improved year on year - perhaps too slowly for some - and his smart moves in the transfer window would suggest again that the Greenbacks are taking incremental steps forward. The problem might be that others have taken bigger steps and will still overtake the 20-times champion works club.

One of those could well be St. Bernadine Athletic. Last season was a disappointment for them, having strengthened impressively; but they now have two World Cup winning strikers in their starting eleven and highly-rated former Kozakken Boys manager Dan Stappenbelt at the helm, moving quickly to fire long-time coach Pirmin Wägeli to make room for the newly available hot property, after the Boys were expelled from the league. And Coach Stappenbelt didn't hang around in adding more strength to the team - bringing in no less than a Vilitan and a Krytenian on free transfers. This could be the dark horse team coming up on the outside.

Or maybe it will be a dark owl team. Newly promoted Tijhuis Archimedes, The Owls, have wowed everyone with their canny operations in the transfer market, not spending a penny, and making the most of unusual conditions in local and world football. The collapse of the Boys club was their first opportunity, signing three of Kozakken's best on free transfers; and then came Vilitagate, and the unwanted players from Ao - Mustardy coach Armand Voyer was first to spot a remarkable if controversial opportunity to bring in three players from the one of the genetically superior footballing nations, and no fees involved. It all adds up to a newly promoted team who might pitch straight for intercontinental qualification, just as Orchideeën did last season. Or even... the title? Surely not!

The Rest

Speaking of Orchideeën, the Nurserymen seem to have experienced time standing still with no movement in or out of the team this season. With the youngest squad in the league, they may be future challengers building a dynasty - they have certainly done that before, holding the record for most consecutive titles with their famous and unrepeatable nine-in-a-row back in the forties - but for now, it looks like a harder season than last year's efficient return to top flight football.

Both Shakerssen and MAG have punched above their weight in recent seasons, and might again surprise a few with a push toward the FFI play-offs - but it would be a surprise. FZK have been disappointing over the last few years, and so far foreign coach Koordinator Satripy has not been able to reverse the decline. A lot of football insiders rate her very highly though, so here's another one to look out for. Possibly.

At the wrong end of the table the only good news for Hauser & Kofel, who escaped the noose last time around on a technicality with the expulsion of the Boys club, is the fact that the beginning of league reorganisation means only one team will go down this season. They have a chance to survive, although who would you look at and consider worse than The Mariners, on paper? Even newly-promoted 1860 Delénacht would seem to have more prospects, thanks to some strengthening courtesy of the Boys and their cancelled player contracts.

Favorite for relegation: Hauser & Kofel

The Squad Summaries
Star players bolded

Head Coach: Jovin Strähl

Last two seasons: 1st | 1st

First XI: Reino Kononen, 29 (VIL); Ebi Hummel (C), 32, Adrien Burkhard, 36, Bors Warwick, 34 (NPH), Urban Preisig, 33; Laurin Laurer, 31, Maas Kwappert, 19, Luis Glücki, 22, Valentin Fey, 22; Bruce Hoogewarf, 31 (BRO), Blaz Kovacec, 19 (MYT)

Major Signings: Reino Kononen (free), Maas Kwappert (1m)

Major Departures: Franklin von Gunten (released)

Betting: 82.1 / 4th

Manager: Nelis Fijnwever

Last two seasons: 2nd | 2nd

First XI: Fiete Dällenbach, 30; Zhang Zhenxin, 31 (YZH), Friedolin Spiess, 25, Nando Balsiger, 33, Chance Benton (C), 32 (GRU); Laurent Lapix, 22 (RCN), Jules Reimann, 30, Raul Kopp, 30, Res Zweifel, 34; Natanaël Tanga, 27 (ZEN), Mere Eljas Faliri, 25 (FFD)

Major Signings: Laurent Lapix (26m)

Major Departures: None

Betting: 89.5 / 2nd

Manager: Bradley Kemerer-Lascelles (BKL) [QUE]

Last two seasons: 7th | 3rd

First XI: Ivan Klank, 27 (XAN); Gabriel Neumeister, 29, Josif Rothacher, 22, Sanno Walder, 33, Guy Kòsi, 36 (ZEN); Linard Sutter, 33, Tanica Darr Qib 'iithli, (C) 38 (GEE), Lothaire Cromwell, 36 (NPH), Till Haid, 33; Aaron Brechbühler, 33, Martim Picasso, 35 (PFA)

Major Signings: None

Major Departures: None

Betting: 90.3 / 1st

Manager: Nelo Holzer

Last two seasons: 6th | 4th

First XI: Alimayu Shiben, 33 (SRS); Weinert Marggi (C), 37, Idrissa Konat, 31 (MAK), Carsten Könneker, 25 (GOH), Federico Kaufmann, 33; Alessandro Kislig, 32, Enno Eggen, 29, Bobby Wong, 32 (DAN), Stefaan Beldman, 28; Paulie Morf, 31, Jvars Greber, 24

Major Signings: Carsten Könneker (free), Bobby Wong (free)

Major Departures: Federicho Rütschi (undisclosed)

Betting: 74.7 / 7th

Manager: Dan Stappenbelt

Last two seasons: 3rd | 9th

First XI: Tim Speich, 30; Raul Inäbnit, 22, Tero Alatalo, 31 (VIL), Vincent Aury, 30 (MUS), Töbe Aerle, 19; Max Swift, 31 (KRY), Earl Kynance, 41 (BSE), Ramun Kunz, 26, Daniel Bösch, 37; Danny Mastorqa, 25 (DLT), Tai Cerotha, 26 (DLT)

Major Signings: Dan Stappenbelt (manager), Tero Alatalo (free), Max Swift (free)

Major Departures: Lorian Germann (retired)

Betting: 80.9 / 6th

Manager: Maurits-jan Veerenjans

Last two seasons: 1st (SteuerLig-2, promoted) | 5th

First XI: Diederick Booij, 26; Victoriano van Alst, 22 (CCO), V.W. Kamperman, 20, Egbert Stertjan, 28, Laurens Seuper (C), 24; Hirune Afmadu, 35 (SRS), Christian Lange-Parker, 24 (SNL), Reggy van Buiten, 23, Harrie Arendsen, 33; Gillis Würsten, 28, Jeroen Blenkers, 23

Major Signings: None

Major Departures: None

Betting: 82.1 / 6th

Manager: Armand Voyer (MUS)

Last two seasons: 2nd (SteuerLig-2) | 1st (SteuerLig-2, promoted)

First XI: Morten Gallis, 21 (AUP); Mikaela Äijälä, 26 (VIL), Partos Arigani, 30 (SRS), Mart-jan Teunissen, 30, Marlijn van Wesup (C), 32; Thijs Dankelman, 28, Sami Samiii, 31 (VIL), Wim Menneken, 28, Riku Kasslin, 31 (VIL); Herman Avelson, 29 (SLT), Eduardo Mendoza, 29 (TAM)

Major Signings: Morten Gallis, Mikaela Äijälä, Partos Arigani, Sami Samiii, Riku Kasslin, Eduardo Mendoza (all free transfers)

Major Departures: None

Betting: 86.8 / 3rd

Manager: Koordinator Satripy [MSD]

Last two seasons: 11th | 8th

First XI: Ukamai Talingri, 35 (VIL); Lionel Benz (C), 37, Christian Perreten, 30, Uto Uhlmann, 28, Tsujii, 21 (CCO); Jacinto Gempeler, 25, Nino Fehlmann, 21, Gabin-Livio Pereira, 20 (SNL), Simon Bessan, 23; Oliver Heiniger, 28, Hicarna, 21 (MSD)

Major Signings: Ukamai Talingri (free), Gabin-Livio Pereira (free)

Major Departures: Isaiah Gloyas (undisclosed)

Betting: 71.1 / 8th

Manager: Hänggi Rüfenacht

Last two seasons: 5th | 12th

First XI: Mark Rüegger, 30; Linard Geissbühler, 23, Machiel Foekers, 32, Nino Brawand, 38, Rätus Bur, 21; Lorin Müngers, 24, Jocki Moroff, 21, Levin Buchmann, 20, Emiel Uunks, 40; Zubi Zuberbühler (C), 24, Nika Burri, 28

Major Signings: Dinko Kumicic (free)

Major Departures: None

Betting: 47.4 / 14th

Manager: Nanko Kijk in 't Veld

Last two seasons: 10th | 7th

First XI: Steef van 't Roth, 21; Henk Schutte, 19, Alfredo Neves, 39 (IPN), Dries Tijsselink (C), 34, Laurens Boevink, 21; Klaas-Jan Wullink, 30, Mart-jan Woker, 21, Joris van Berkum, 21, Ard Elbersen, 30; Rik Dam, 25, Bonaventure Richard, 33 (MUS)

Major Signings: Nanko Kijk in 't Veld (manager), Mart-jan Woker (free)

Major Departures: Maas Kwappert (1m)

Betting: 53.5 / 13th

Manager: Rudie Mellema

Last two seasons: 12th | 11th

First XI: Maup Phiffers, 30; Othmar Zesiger, 29, Klaas-Jan Rechterschot, 24, Jan Svärd, (C) 34 (SVJ), Ton Masseus, 26; Rudie Mellema, 38, Niek Mooiers, 23, Éric Tsukulu, 36 (MAK), Robert-Jan Vagevuur, 20; Eelco Siero, 35, Christiaan Scholte Meijerink, 22

Major Signings: None

Major Departures: Dan ten Tije (retired)

Betting: 42.4 / 15th

Manager: Pirmin Wägeli

Last two seasons: 8th | 14th

First XI: Simon Ochsner 31; Arpinho, 28 (IPN), Nolan Kägi, 25, Pirmin Kellersberger, 40, Serdinho, 33 (IPN); Erroneous Null, 24 (QAD), Sebastian Bettler (C), 35, Edwin Markozy, 31 (ZRH), Jurrien Holtsingel, 18; Orell Speich, 31, Serdar Admiri, 25 (SRS)

Major Signings: Pirmin Wägeli (manager), Serdar Admiri (free)

Major Departures: None

Betting: 58.8 / 10th

Manager: Adam Ackeret

Last two seasons: 15th | 13th

First XI: Alessio Hirschi (C), 30; Maxime Hug, 36, Rayan Schiefer, 29, Hias Ramseyer, 34, Ethan Felber, 34; Jurian van Enk, 27, Neil Lützelschwab, 41, Jason Bolliger, 19, Niklas Rolli, 20; Tell Wäch, 25, Amblix, 22 (MSD)

Major Signings: Adam Ackeret (manager), Jurian van Enk (free)

Major Departures: None

Betting: 62.0 / 9th

Manager: Gaetan Lehnherr

Last two seasons: 4th (SteuerLig-2) | 3rd (SteuerLig-2, promoted)

First XI: Nicolas Stauffacher, 24; Göpf Lieber, 26, Finnian Rösli, 26, Reto Guggisberg, 27, Bendicht Wehrli, 22; Alessandro Allebrand 32, Saturnin Barrios, 35 (TAM), Gene Häsler (C), 33, Leandro Wettstein, 33; Valentijn van der Scheer, 23, Norin Von Gunten, 28

Major Signings: Saturnin Barrios (free), Valentijn van der Scheer (free)

Major Departures: None

Betting: 55.4 / 12th

Manager: Anaïs Aescher

Last two seasons: 14th | 10th

First XI: Chiel Schreiers, 29; Reinout ten Cate, 19, Theo Greber, 21, Toni Gretler, 34, Riccardo Bürkli, 32; Ramun Friedrich, 37, Abi Lobsiger, 37, Enno Siebold (C), 40, Alessio Rotach, 22; Timo Ellenberger, 36, Jenson Masuka, 30 (ZEN)

Major Signings: Reinout ten Cate (free)

Major Departures: Gianin Schilling (retired)

Betting: 57.7 / 11th

Manager: Reto Ehrensperger

Last two seasons: 13th | 15th

First XI: Henk-Jan Stender, 31; Florens Klein Stroek, 23, Remko Geerlings, 38, Paschalis Kopp, 26, Thies Nijzink (C), 41; Jeroen Egberts, 22, Riccardo Oswald, 23, Benson Rubi, 23, Chiel Hulst, 34; Christiaan Schopman, 28, Guus Mensink, 31

Major Signings: Florens Klein Stroek (free), Guus Mensink (free)

Major Departures: Ko Olthuis (retired)

Betting: 37.6 / 16th

by **Taxhavn** » Tue Jan 23, 2024 12:43 am

Season '91 Review
Part 1/3

The League
Round-by-round highlights to matchday 10

Match of the Round: 1
Orchideeën 6-0 1860 Delénacht
Life in the top flight is already looking like it could be hard on The Browns, as their opening match after promotion sees them hit for six in Maartenstad. The future looks bright, however - the future looks orange - for the Nurserymen, whose young team played with verve and confidence. 23-year old striker Jeroen Blenkers hit a brace and his replacement, young Walter Timmerhendriks, 20, also scored twice after coming on with fifteen minutes remaining, sending Orchideeën top on the opening weekend of the season.

.
            FC Städeli 3-4 Hauser & Kofel
         Standard Lily 3-1 De Tike VF
    Tijhuis Archimedes 0-2 Shakerssen
           Raven Thöni 3-0 MAG
            Orchideeën 6-0 1860 Delénacht
St. Bernadine Athletic 4-4 Stadler Works
                   BSN 4-0 St. Bernadine Accountants
                   FZK 1-2 St. Bernardine Amateur

Match of the Round: 2
Stadler Works 0-8 Raven Thöni
The three-time reigning champions, 3-0 winners on the opening weekend, go top in week two with a stunning victory over the Works team. Things look a little ominous for the rest of the division with the All-Blacks unbreachable over two games with new Vilitan goalkeeper Reino Kononen between the sticks. Anaïs Aescher's Works team hit a creditable draw at St. B Athletic last week, but that 4-4 draw combined with this drubbing suggest there is some defensive strengthening needed urgently. Incredibly the All-Blacks weren't the highest scoring team of the weekend as 1860 Delénacht shipped another nine at home to Tijhuis Archimedes.

.
               De Tike VF 0-5 FC Städeli
               Shakerssen 1-0 Hauser & Kofel
                      MAG 5-3 Standard Lily
           1860 Delénacht 3-9 Tijhuis Archimedes
            Stadler Works 0-8 Raven Thöni
St. Bernadine Accountants 1-0 Orchideeën
   St. Bernardine Amateur 0-1 St. Bernadine Athletic
                      FZK 1-0 BSN

Match of the Round: 3
Raven Thöni 0-4 St. Bernardine Amateur
And just like that, the spell was broken. Reino Kononen had a nightmare, Raven Thöni were thrashed, and Amateur's Sea Domer striker Amblix had the game of their life at the Bezirker Stadion, scoring twice and getting two assists as Adam Ackeret's charges upset the apple cart in the districts. Probably just a freak result, but one Shakerssen will take as the surprise remaining 100%-ers, having seen off FC Städeli and sitting proudly top on matchday 3. Coach Jovin Strähl came out afterwards to heavily criticise his defenders for letting Kononen down, but most pundits agree he mostly let himself down, getting all the key calls flat-out wrong.

.
            FC Städeli 1-3 Shakerssen
            De Tike VF 1-1 MAG
        Hauser & Kofel 1-1 1860 Delénacht
         Standard Lily 4-0 Stadler Works
    Tijhuis Archimedes 1-3 St. Bernadine Accountants
           Raven Thöni 0-4 St. Bernardine Amateur
            Orchideeën 4-2 FZK
St. Bernadine Athletic 2-2 BSN

Match of the Round: 4
MAG 1-8 FC Städeli
The Frigates aren't doing anything by halves, with two poor defeats to Hauser & Kofel and Shakerssen straddling a 5-0 win at De Tike, and now this whopping win against a dangerous and equally unpredictable MAG. The season has been all over the place in the first few rounds and FC Städeli are quintessentially emblematic of that. Here BKL's veterans were on fire, with Tanica Darr Qib 'iithli, Lothaire Cromwell and Martim Picasso - average age 37 - cruising like a vintage classic with MAG largely confined to the passenger seats.

.
                      MAG 1-8 FC Städeli
           1860 Delénacht 3-2 Shakerssen
            Stadler Works 2-1 De Tike VF
St. Bernadine Accountants 2-0 Hauser & Kofel
   St. Bernardine Amateur 0-1 Standard Lily
                      FZK 0-2 Tijhuis Archimedes
                      BSN 2-2 Raven Thöni
   St. Bernadine Athletic 3-0 Orchideeën

Match of the Round: 5
Raven Thöni 4-3 Orchideeën
The first big matchup of the season was at the Bezirker Stadion as the Nurserymen rolled into the districts looking like contenders, but needing to get back on track after a hammering at St. B Athletic last round. Raven Thöni snatched a late draw at BSN so they were also making up for lost points and in a humdinger of a match, it was the All-Blacks who prevailed, again scoring twice late on, both in injury time, to turnaround what looked a certain defeat. Young Mytanji striker Blaz Kovacec, in his second season with the reigning triple champions, is growing into his responsibilities nicely and won player of the match award after hitting a hatrick here. Meanwhile Reino Kononen is still not back to his best in goal and making far too many mistakes for coach Jovin Strähl's liking. Orchideeën will be disappointed with a second straight defeat in such dramatic circumstances but encouraged by the quality they are getting from the youngest squad in the league.

.
        FC Städeli 1-1 1860 Delénacht
               MAG 0-2 Stadler Works
        Shakerssen 0-3 St. Bernadine Accountants
        De Tike VF 1-1 St. Bernardine Amateur
    Hauser & Kofel 2-1 FZK
     Standard Lily 1-1 BSN
Tijhuis Archimedes 1-1 St. Bernadine Athletic
       Raven Thöni 4-3 Orchideeën

Match of the Round: 6
Raven Thöni 2-2 Tijhuis Archimedes
Newly-promoted Tijhuis Archimedes are really beginning to show their mettle in this league and took the game to Raven Thöni who are still looking for consistent form. Another top match between top teams, it was all about the Vilitans as Simi Simiii, Mikaela Äijälä, and Riku Kasslin went head to head with fellow dispossessed countryman Reino Kononen, and no quarter given. The Owls were well worthy of their draw, and while Kononen conceded another brace, he looked back to his commanding self for much of the game, cutting out lazy mistakes and appearing to enjoy the challenge. Certainly the busiest of the two keepers, he'll have won back a few cynics for this performance - but in pure points tally terms, the All-Blacks find themselves behind where they would want to be six games in.

.
            Stadler Works 0-3 FC Städeli
St. Bernadine Accountants 6-1 1860 Delénacht
   St. Bernardine Amateur 2-0 MAG
                      FZK 2-1 Shakerssen
                      BSN 1-0 De Tike VF
   St. Bernadine Athletic 6-1 Hauser & Kofel
               Orchideeën 0-0 Standard Lily
              Raven Thöni 2-2 Tijhuis Archimedes

Match of the Round: 7
Standard Lily 1-3 Tijhuis Archimedes
Perhaps it's too early to call this a six-pointer, but anyone who laughed at title talk for the Owls will sit up and take notice of this remarkable and thoroughly deserved win at the Havnstadion against the table toppers going into this match. Standard took an early lead through midfield ace Laurent Lapix and were dominant in the first quarter of the match, but once Archimedes settled into this match and got themselves level before the break through Herman Avelson's spectacular strike, they always looked favourite to take the points. Keep this up and the Owls will be right there at the end of the season, while Standard can have no complaints on the day. They can do better, and will.

.
    FC Städeli 6-3 St. Bernadine Accountants
 Stadler Works 1-4 St. Bernardine Amateur
1860 Delénacht 1-1 FZK
           MAG 3-1 BSN
    Shakerssen 3-1 St. Bernadine Athletic
    De Tike VF 0-1 Orchideeën
Hauser & Kofel 2-2 Raven Thöni
 Standard Lily 1-3 Tijhuis Archimedes

Match of the Round: 8
St. Bernadine Athletic 4-0 1860 Delénacht
With Tijhuis and Orchideeën both drawing, and FC Städeli & Raven Thöni losing, Athletic took advantage to go top, their two world cup winners Tai Cerotha and Danny Mastorqa hitting a brace each against The Browns, who were beginning to show green shoots of adaptation to life in the top flight before coming to The Athletic Club and being rolled over. With De Tike looking abject in the first quarter of the season, the visitors will hold out some hope of keeping their place in the top division but they will need to improve on this showing where they once again shipped too many too easily. Athletic were an outside bet for the title and they look value for that, former Boys Club coach Dan Stappenbelt beginning to make his mark on this team that has plenty of quality.

.
St. Bernardine Amateur 1-0 FC Städeli
                   FZK 1-4 St. Bernadine Accountants
                   BSN 1-1 Stadler Works
St. Bernadine Athletic 4-0 1860 Delénacht
            Orchideeën 1-1 MAG
           Raven Thöni 2-4 Shakerssen
    Tijhuis Archimedes 1-1 De Tike VF
         Standard Lily 1-0 Hauser & Kofel

Match of the Round: 9
Shakerssen 4-11 Standard Lily
How do you even begin to explain a result like this - you couldn't make it up... Okay, let me try:

The Shakers had been going well with a best ever start to the season, even pushing for a place at the top where St. Bernadine Athletic were presently sitting. And they raced into a three goal lead early on, looking to be clear and away with 20 minutes gone. It seemed like just a matter of how many as they tore the Pollen Counters apart. A hint of things to come arrived with the soft sending off of captain Zubi Zuberbühler under contentious circumstances just after he'd scored Shakerssen's third. He had received a yellow card for an over-exuberant celebration, and then committed a foul with a little bit extra left in and some dissent almost immediately from the restart. Marching orders. Lily pulled one back, but then the home side steadied themselves and scored a fourth, restoring their three goal advantage before half time. In the tunnel a scuffel broke out, and unseen by the crowd, Shakerssen's veteran defender Nino Brawand got himself a straight red, not emerging for the second half as the home side, 4-1 ahead, lined up with nine men. After that, it was damage limitation, and not well accomplished. Standard had pulled it back to 4-3 within ten minutes of the second half starting, and then Lorin Müngers lashed out and became the third man off for The Shakers. It was all downhill from there as Standard, masterly orchestrated by Laurent Lapix in midfield, dismantled what was left of the home team with two goals and three assists, while Farv striker Mere Eljas Faliri hit five and missed a penalty for his double-hatrick. Several Shakerssen players did their best to get sent off, knowing that reducing the team to seven would cause an abandonment of the match, but the ref wasn't having any of it, perhaps enjoying Standard Lily's utter destruction of the home team in an unrepeatable classic.

.
               FC Städeli 1-1 FZK
   St. Bernardine Amateur 2-4 BSN
St. Bernadine Accountants 0-4 St. Bernadine Athletic
            Stadler Works 2-2 Orchideeën
           1860 Delénacht 1-1 Raven Thöni
                      MAG 3-5 Tijhuis Archimedes
               Shakerssen 4-11 Standard Lily
               De Tike VF 0-2 Hauser & Kofel

Match of the Round: 10
St. Bernadine Athletic 1-6 FZK
Another week, another crazy result. Athletic are unceremoniously knocked off their perch by Koordinator Satripy's FZK, the Barrel Rollers coming into the capital and flattening the title contenders with one of the more lopsided results of the opening stages of the season. Athletic couldn't blame a rash of red cards here, with 11 vs. 11 to the final whistle, but it was like boys vs. men for all that; lets not forget FZK have their own less feted Vilitan in goalkeeper Ukamai Talingri, but it was a young striker, Hicarna, who grabbed the headlines with four goals against the league leaders. Right now nobody seems ready to make a concerted grab for the title, but Standard Lily and Tijhuis Archimedes leapfrog Athletic with big wins of their own in what presently looks like an eight-horse race.

.
                   BSN 1-2 FC Städeli
St. Bernadine Athletic 1-6 FZK
            Orchideeën 3-0 St. Bernardine Amateur
           Raven Thöni 3-2 St. Bernadine Accountants
    Tijhuis Archimedes 5-1 Stadler Works
         Standard Lily 5-0 1860 Delénacht
        Hauser & Kofel 2-2 MAG
            De Tike VF 1-2 Shakerssen

SteuerLig-1 Standings
Pollen Counters Ahead By A Nose

The Pollen Counters have carved out a slender lead at the top of the table as the unpredictable season reaches the first third of its course, and right behind them are newly-promoted Tijhuis Archimedes looking in good shape for a challenge with their Vilitan cohort showing extra class in amongst the pack of chasers. Shakerssen's surprise start puts them above both FC Städeli and Raven Thöni, who aren't far off the pace but have suffered inconsistency so far in a season where nobody has managed to put in an unequivocal sequence of dominance. The other surprise package in the top half is the Accountants, who have been poor now for a number of seasons but may have turned the corner under coach Permin Wägeli, who switched in the off-season from Triple-A rivals Athletic.

At the bottom, 1860 Delénacht have found the going difficult indeed, while De Tike FC look in real trouble. Hauser & Kofel have surprised everyone with their mediocrity, a big improvement on recent seasons, while BSN are matching them, coming from the other direction of once having been considered contenders. They look to have their own troubles this season and coach Nelo Holzer will be dreading the endorsement from the board which must be on the horizon as the prelude to the sack. Remarkably after ten games no-one has pulled the trigger yet, but Holzer and FZK's Koordinator Satripy look the most vulnerable right now. You wouldn't rule out Quebecois head coach Bradley Kemerer-Lacelles - BKL - at FC Städeli soon if their underwhelming start doesn't improve, and of course player-coach Rudie Mellema at De Tike FC has got to be worried. But how do you sack the coach when he's also your best player?


    Team                           P  W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 Standard Lily                 10  6  2  2  30  14  +16  20
  2 Tijhuis Archimedes            10  5  3  2  29  17  +12  18
  3 St. Bernadine Athletic        10  5  3  2  27  17  +10  18
  4 St. Bernadine Accountants     10  6  0  4  24  20   +4  18
  5 Shakerssen                    10  6  0  4  22  24   -2  18
  6 FC Städeli                    10  5  2  3  30  15  +15  17
  7 Raven Thöni                   10  4  4  2  27  20   +7  16
  8 St. Bernardine Amateur        10  5  1  4  16  12   +4  16
  9 Orchideeën                    10  4  3  3  20  13   +7  15
 10 BSN                           10  3  4  3  17  14   +3  13
 11 Hauser & Kofel                10  3  3  4  14  19   -5  12
 12 FZK                           10  3  2  5  16  18   -2  11
 13 MAG                           10  2  3  5  16  28  -12   9
 14 Stadler Works                 10  2  3  5  13  32  -19   9
 15 1860 Delénacht                10  1  4  5  11  36  -25   7
 16 De Tike VF                    10  0  3  7   6  19  -13   3

SteuerLig-2 Promotion Chasers


    Team                          P  W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 OSA                          10  8  1  1  32  10  +22  25
  2 VF Romainring                10  7  1  2  23  11  +12  22
  3 St. Bernadine Academical     10  5  2  3  25  17   +8  17
  4 Benson Foxes                 10  5  2  3  16  14   +2  17
  5 Schwänenclub                 10  5  1  4  28  10  +18  16
  6 Axis Driessche               10  5  1  4  15  11   +4  16
  7 HPV                          10  5  1  4  29  27   +2  16

Intercontinental Football
IFCF Preliminary Rounds

The 17th IFCF Champions League

Perhaps a good explanation for the All-Blacks inconsistent travails in the league is their astonishing ride to the group stage of the Champions League, where the small matter of eight additional games has seen them claim some remarkable results, the highlight perhaps turning around a home defeat to the Geektopian NOK Bandits in the play-off round with a penalty shoot-out victory to secure group stage football. Purists will also have enjoyed their 5-1 win at the Bezirker Stadion over Commerce Golden Guns. Another six games await the All-Blacks, and fans will be thrilled to be seeing mighty Raynor City United come to the districts.

First qualifying round
Champions path
(CCO)  Commerce Golden Guns 1–7 Raven Thöni  (TAX)  1–5   0–2 

Second qualifying round
Champions path
(TAX)  Raven Thöni  4–1  Nangang Royals  (YZH)  1–1   3–0

Third qualifying round
Champions path
(TAX)  Raven Thöni  5–2  Bavingtor FC  (FVA)  2–1   3–1 

Playoff Round
(TAX)  Raven Thöni  p 2–2  N.O.K. Bandits Lito	  (GEE)  1–2   1–0  (4–3 pen)

The 17th IFCF Challengers Cup

It was a disappointingly quick exit from the Challengers Cup for both BSN and FC Städeli, who haven't been on it in the opening stages of the season and were quickly found out in the Cup, neither managing to get anything from their games against Meldrum Fall and Langmere respectively. Standard Lily gave cause for optimism, cruising through to the third qualifying round where they came up against the heavyweight Tanrısal. Despite acquitting themselves well in both games, they fell to a narrow defeat in Pasarga, meaning no group stage football in the Challengers Cup.

First qualifying round
(TAX)  BSN  0–6  Meldrum Fall  (SVI)  0–2   0–4 
(TAX)  FC Städeli  1–2  Langmere Green Rovers FC  (FVA)  1–2   0–0 
(TAX)  Standard Lily  3–2  Trimidau Rukiya  (PFA)  2–0   1–2

Second qualifying round
(TAX)  Standard Lily  7–1  U.S Scudelli  (JUE)  5–0   2–1

Third qualifying round
(TAX)  Standard Lily  2–3  Tanrısal  (PAS)  1–2   1–1

The 17th IFCF Liga B Champions Trophy

Tijhuis Archimedes, with Vilitans on display, briefly threatened to make the Liga-B group stage after reaching the Playoff round and bringing Halpenley United to the packed and electric Oranjestadt Arena with a 2-1 first leg lead. But it all fell apart on home soil as The Owls fell to a poor 0-3 defeat to end dreams of group stage football. Both VF Romainring and 1860 Delénacht fell at the first hurdle, and for The Browns, that was probably a good thing - concentrate on the league, and all that.

Second qualifying round
(TAX)  VF Romainring  1–3  Sportivo Fernandino  (YGZ)   0–2   1–1 
(TAX)  1860 Delénacht  2–5  Serdtse Pyazhnyi Makharetsk  (PYA)   1–4   1–1 

Third qualifying round
(GLZ)  Partick & Broomhill  1–3  Tijhuis Archimedes  (TAX)   1–2   0–1 

Playoff Round
(TAX)  Tijhuis Archimedes  2–4  Halpenley United  (SYL)  0–3   2–1

by **Taxhavn** » Sat Jan 27, 2024 1:02 am

Season '91 Review
Part 2/3

The League
Round-by-round highlights to matchday 20

Match of the Round: 11
1860 Delénacht 2-0 De Tike FC
A relegation six-pointer is the focus of this week's match of the round with all the title-hopefuls winning - apart from the draw between FC Städeli and Athletic - and the newly-promoted Browns get a vital win at a packed 1860-Ovaal, the home fans sensing how critical this might be in a survival struggle. Norin Von Gunten and Leandro Wettstein get the vital goals, leaving Rudie Mellema's De Tike FC in dire trouble. No Way Out seems like the theme of the day for the Clockwork Orange & Blues, and the board must surely be considering their options as the team go eleven games without a win. Only Koordinator Satripy at FZK looks more vulnerable at this point, receiving the fateful ringing endorsement from her board immediately after a 1-4 pounding at home by Raven Thöni.

.
               FC Städeli 1-1 St. Bernadine Athletic
                      BSN 0-4 Orchideeën
                      FZK 1-4 Raven Thöni
   St. Bernardine Amateur 0-2 Tijhuis Archimedes
St. Bernadine Accountants 1-2 Standard Lily
            Stadler Works 2-0 Hauser & Kofel
           1860 Delénacht 2-0 De Tike VF
                      MAG 1-0 Shakerssen

Match of the Round: 12
Standard Lily 0-1 FZK
Perhaps not the biggest match of the day, but with her job hanging in the balance, Koordinator Satripy marshalls her men to an impressive win at the Havnstadion. Fellow Sea Domer Hicarna does her the favour, carving out a goal from nowhere to shock the Pollen Counters on their home turf. It's a vital win for struggling FZK and The Koordinator, who perhaps falls behind in the sack race. Nelo Holzer at BSN, himself on a tightrope, pulled off another shock of the day as his Greenbacks got a big win at leaders Tijhuis Archimedes, who hold on to top spot only by virtue of FZK's win here.

.
        Orchideeën 0-0 FC Städeli
       Raven Thöni 1-1 St. Bernadine Athletic
Tijhuis Archimedes 1-4 BSN
     Standard Lily 0-1 FZK
    Hauser & Kofel 1-5 St. Bernardine Amateur
        De Tike VF 0-2 St. Bernadine Accountants
        Shakerssen 3-0 Stadler Works
               MAG 1-0 1860 Delénacht

Match of the Round: 13
Orchideeën 1-4 Tijhuis Archimedes
What a derby fixture this is - the Oranjiklassieker - undoubtedly the biggest of the league; and first blood goes to The Owls, who reaffirm their title credentials at the expense of their biggest rivals. A hattrick from Tamarindian striker Eduardo Mendoza, amply supported by still-world-class-even-if-everyone-hates-him Vilitan Sami Samiii, who also hit the fourth. The young Nurserymen had virtually nothing to offer in return, Jeroen Blenkers late strike little by way of consolation in this must-win fixture for Orchideeën. Bragging rights lost, for the time being.

.
               FC Städeli 1-1 Raven Thöni
               Orchideeën 1-4 Tijhuis Archimedes
   St. Bernadine Athletic 2-4 Standard Lily
                      BSN 3-0 Hauser & Kofel
                      FZK 5-1 De Tike VF
   St. Bernardine Amateur 1-4 Shakerssen
St. Bernadine Accountants 2-2 MAG
            Stadler Works 5-1 1860 Delénacht

Match of the Round: 14
Standard Lily 2-3 Raven Thöni
The second classico in two weeks, the Neuerklassiker goes the way of the All-Blacks in a right royal rumble at the Havnstadion. Raven Thöni, with only one win in their past seven games, really needed to pull out all the stops and this will be a big morale booster with their domestic season looking increasingly precarious. Impressive intercontinental performances have kept fans bouyant so far, but a win in the derby - and away from home - really is the filip everyone needs. For Standard, the result is an unhappy one but few would complain at the quality of the match. Laurent Lapix once again runs the midfield for the Pollen Counters, and they will consider themselves unlucky not to have won at least a point, with Natanaël Tanga and Mere Eljas Faliri twice giving the Pollen Counters the lead, only to be pegged back by Luis Glücki, Bruce Hoogewarf and a Blaz Kovacec winner.

.
Tijhuis Archimedes 1-4 FC Städeli
     Standard Lily 2-3 Raven Thöni
    Hauser & Kofel 0-1 Orchideeën
        De Tike VF 1-6 St. Bernadine Athletic
        Shakerssen 1-0 BSN
               MAG 1-0 FZK
    1860 Delénacht 0-2 St. Bernardine Amateur
     Stadler Works 1-5 St. Bernadine Accountants

Match of the Round: 15
FC Städeli 2-2 Standard Lily
Classic number three - the Westernklassiker - sees honours even between the two stuttering title contenders who cannot get up a good head of steam despite remaining in contention. Murmers of discontent in the ultra sections at both ends and rumours in the press box that suggest both managers, BKL and Nelis Fijnewever, are under scrutiny from their higher ups, is entirely ridiculous. Nevertheless, for Standard it's one point from three vital games against league challengers recently. BKL's Frigates did at least have the cushion of a strong win at Tijhuis last week, so there is that. All this overshadows another brilliant klassiker, full of good football and one glaring miss from Martim Picasso from the spot in injury time that would certainly have won it for the home side.

.
            FC Städeli 2-2 Standard Lily
    Tijhuis Archimedes 4-1 Hauser & Kofel
           Raven Thöni 1-1 De Tike VF
            Orchideeën 1-0 Shakerssen
St. Bernadine Athletic 4-0 MAG
                   BSN 1-0 1860 Delénacht
                   FZK 1-1 Stadler Works
St. Bernardine Amateur 0-3 St. Bernadine Accountants

Match of the Round: 16
Shakerssen 6-7 Tijhuis Archimedes
There have been some crazy results The Goods Yard Stadium (not ironically known as the Shaker Dome) this season and here's another one right up there as defences took a mid-season holiday and left it to the strikers to score it out, basketball-style. The Owls prevailed in the end, really only because time ran out - another five minutes and anything could've happened. No hattricks here - goals came from all over the field with no less than twelve scorers on the pitch, only Shakers captain Zubi Zuberbühler managing to get on the scoresheet more than once with his brace, though it did not help in the end. Tijhuis go back on top with this win and prove, with seven players scoring, they won't be short of goals this season.

.
           Hauser & Kofel 2-2 FC Städeli
               De Tike VF 0-4 Standard Lily
               Shakerssen 6-7 Tijhuis Archimedes
                      MAG 2-0 Raven Thöni
           1860 Delénacht 3-3 Orchideeën
            Stadler Works 1-0 St. Bernadine Athletic
St. Bernadine Accountants 3-0 BSN
   St. Bernardine Amateur 0-2 FZK

Match of the Round: 17
Standard Lily 8-1 MAG
Some say the attacking intent in the league is astounding. Some say the quality is appalling and the results look more like a schoolboy league. Yet others feel the scorinator was probably written by a schoolboy. It depends which side of the terrace you stand on. In any case, the Pollen Counters hit a big count at the Havnstadion to reassert their claims for a place in the leading pack, Natanaël Tanga and Farv Mere Eljas Faliri combining brilliantly throughout to give the Busmen a nightmare at the back. With Tijhuis Archimedes dropping points, Standard edge closer to the top. For MAG, only the woeful De Tike FC gives them room to breathe. No-one is going down this season except the Clockwork Orange & Blues, who were thrashed again, though not so heavily, at FC Städeli.

.
            FC Städeli 4-0 De Tike VF
        Hauser & Kofel 0-6 Shakerssen
         Standard Lily 8-1 MAG
    Tijhuis Archimedes 0-0 1860 Delénacht
           Raven Thöni 1-0 Stadler Works
            Orchideeën 4-4 St. Bernadine Accountants
St. Bernadine Athletic 0-1 St. Bernardine Amateur
                   BSN 1-1 FZK

Match of the Round: 18
St. Bernadine Accountants 0-5 Tijhuis Archimedes
A battle for top spot really proved to be no contest as the surprise package, the Accountants, who have emerged strongly in recent rounds, were swept from the board by The Owls. Can anyone stop them from making history? Certainly no-one at the Sept-Nat Stadion, where the Vilitan delegation from Tijhuis had this game in the bag and pulled all the strings shut by half-time, with Archimedes leading 4-0. The Bean Counters have kept pace with Tijhuis at the top since round 14, against all the odds, but this was a stark warning that they'll have to improve considerably to stay the course.

.
               Shakerssen 1-2 FC Städeli
                      MAG 3-0 De Tike VF
           1860 Delénacht 0-6 Hauser & Kofel
            Stadler Works 2-2 Standard Lily
St. Bernadine Accountants 0-5 Tijhuis Archimedes
   St. Bernardine Amateur 0-1 Raven Thöni
                      FZK 0-1 Orchideeën
                      BSN 2-0 St. Bernadine Athletic

Match of the Round: 19
FC Städeli 8-0 MAG
Another week, another smashball, and MAG on the receiving end for the second time in three rounds. This time they go to the Städeli Arena where BKL's Frigates are enjoying a run of good results, and find themselves as shooting practice for Aaron Brechbühler and Poaf striker Martim Picasso. A blip for Tijhuis Archimedes means FC Städeli close in on top spot as the business end of the season approaches, and with both Standard and Raven Thöni still in the throes of inconsistency, they might fancy themselves to go all the way under revitalised boss BKL, aka Bradley Kemerer-Lascelles.

.
        FC Städeli 8-0 MAG
        Shakerssen 0-2 1860 Delénacht
        De Tike VF 0-0 Stadler Works
    Hauser & Kofel 0-1 St. Bernadine Accountants
     Standard Lily 4-2 St. Bernardine Amateur
Tijhuis Archimedes 1-1 FZK
       Raven Thöni 2-3 BSN
        Orchideeën 4-2 St. Bernadine Athletic

Match of the Round: 20
St. Bernadine Athletic 1-4 Tijhuis Archimedes
And finally, the sack. Most clubs are putting a brave face on and giving their leaders a chance, but at the Athletic Club time has run out for former Kozakken Boys coach Dan Stappenbelt, who has overseen a stark decline in the middle phase of the season to leave The Honours a long way off the pace for any of them this season. Up against the league leaders, the contrast was stark; and to make it worse, across town St. Bernadine Accountants easily dispatched Shakerssen to hold on to joint top spot with The Owls. Having two world cup winners in the team has availed Stappenbelt nothing, as he does not seemed to have worked out a way to use them effectively. Instead, newly-promoted Tijhuis are making all the headlines, and rolled over their opponents here with gears to spare.

.
           1860 Delénacht 2-3 FC Städeli
            Stadler Works 0-2 MAG
St. Bernadine Accountants 4-0 Shakerssen
   St. Bernardine Amateur 4-0 De Tike VF
                      FZK 2-1 Hauser & Kofel
                      BSN 4-1 Standard Lily
   St. Bernadine Athletic 1-4 Tijhuis Archimedes
               Orchideeën 1-4 Raven Thöni

SteuerLig-1 Standings
Owls Hunting Historic First

Since the creation of the SteuerLigen over forty years ago, no-one has won the title straight after being promoted from the second tier; MAG, back in season 68, and Schäwnenclub in 86, came the closest, both finishing third in their return seasons. Last season everyone was seriously impressed with newly-promoted Orchideeën's fifth place and FFI Confederations Trophy qualification - but a brilliant return from Tijhuis Archimedes has put them in serious contention to be come the first ever champion direct from promotion, edging the usual candidates FC Städeli, Standard Lily and triple champions Raven Thöni. Equally surprising are the co-leaders at the end of the second phase, St. Bernadine Accountants. The Bean Counters have taken advantage of general inconsistency amongst the leading group to get in amongst it, looking for a first SteuerLig title. At the bottom, De Tike FC are as good as gone, still without a win after 20 games and needing a miracle to stay up. They are looking at Dan Stappenbelt to give them a little hope, the coach having endured a torrid time at St. B Athletic who find themselves in the lower reaches of the league - player coach at the Clockwork Orange & Blues, Rudi Mellema, stepping aside by mutual consent to allow Stappenbelt to come in. Meanwhile, Athletic continue to search for a new head coach with assistant Wouter Binnenmars stepping up in the caretaker role.

SteuerLig-1 Standings


    Team                            P   W  D   L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 Tijhuis Archimedes             20  11  5   4  58  35  +23  38
  2 St. Bernadine Accountants      20  12  2   6  49  34  +15  38
  3 FC Städeli                     20  10  7   3  57  25  +32  37
  4 Standard Lily                  20  11  4   5  59  32  +27  37
  5 Raven Thöni                    20   9  7   4  45  32  +13  34
  6 Orchideeën                     20   9  6   5  40  30  +10  33
  7 BSN                            20   9  5   6  35  27   +8  32
  8 Shakerssen                     20  10  0  10  43  42   +1  30
  9 St. Bernardine Amateur         20   9  1  10  31  29   +2  28
 10 MAG                            20   8  4   8  29  50  -21  28
 11 St. Bernadine Athletic         20   7  5   8  44  36   +8  26
 12 FZK                            20   7  5   8  30  29   +1  26
 13 Stadler Works                  20   5  6   9  25  47  -22  21
 14 Hauser & Kofel                 20   4  4  12  25  45  -20  16
 15 1860 Delénacht                 20   3  6  11  21  57  -36  15
 16 De Tike VF                     20   0  5  15   9  50  -41   5

In the second tier, OSA look set for an immediate return as they stretch their lead to an impressive ten points over the chasing pack, with annual challengers VF Romainring back in third and hoping not to have to contend in the play-offs where their record is abject. They will have to overhaul surprise automatic promotion hunters Benson Foxes who hold the second spot, while the rest of the pack are some way behind and doubtful of getting close to the runner-up place.

SteuerLig-2 Promotion Chasers


    Team                           P   W  D   L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 OSA                           20  17  1   2  64  24  +40  52
  2 Benson Foxes                  20  13  3   4  33  21  +12  42
  3 VF Romainring                 20  13  1   6  41  23  +18  40
  4 Axis Driessche                20   9  4   7  31  23   +8  31
  5 Schwänenclub                  20   9  3   8  46  21  +25  30
  6 St. Bernadine Academical      20   9  3   8  50  43   +7  30
  7 VF Merzburg                   20   9  3   8  35  35   +0  30

TaxPokal
The League Member's Knockout Competition

Match of the Round: 1
St. Bernadine Academical 1-0 Raven Thöni
Although The Owls heavy 1-5 home defeat to FC Städeli raised more than a few eyebrows, the big shock of the first round of the first ever TaxPokal was second-tier Adademical's victory over Raven Thöni. The All-Blacks will have to concentrate on the league - and the Champions League, and the Confederations Trophy - after fielding a weakened team and finding themselves well-beaten in the Cup by a team who are enjoying a promising start to their debut season in SteuerLig-2, in amongst the play-off chasers. Led by Deltic attacking midfielder, world cup winner and student at University St. Bernadine Onun Tasher, the Academical were deserved winners at 'The Library', their small multi-sports arena at the uni campus.

Match of the Round: 2
St. Bernadine Athletic 0-7 Standard Lily
Academical provided another shock as they eliminated mighty Orchideeën on penalties at Plantation Field, but Athletic's woes under soon-to-be-sacked Dan Stappenbelt reached some sort of peak with this disastrous home defeat to the Pollen Counters, Farv top scorer Mere Eljas Faliri smashing another hatrick plus two as Standard crushed The Honours on their way to the quarterfinals.

First Round

               De Tike VF 4-0 Hauser & Kofel
                      OSA 1-2 McCunnald
           Axis Driessche 2-3 Standard Lily
 St. Bernadine Academical 1-0 Raven Thöni
       Tijhuis Archimedes 1-5 FC Städeli
St. Bernadine Accountants 3-1 1860 Delénacht
            Stadler Works 1-4 Benson Foxes
   St. Bernadine Athletic 3-2 MAG
           Urban Irminger 0-4 BSN
      Achille Oranjestadt 1-0 VF Romainring
                Immenmold 3-1 Roterlicht Knokschäft
               Orchideeën 5-0 Löwen Bessandorf
    St. Bernadine Amateur 3-2 Schwänenclub
                Beath SSC 1-1 HPV 			(2-1 AET)
              VF Merzburg 2-4 Tulip Maartenstadt
                      FZK 4-1 Shakerssen

Second Round

             Benson Foxes 0-1 FC Städeli
    St. Bernadine Amateur 2-0 Immenmold
       Tulip Maartenstadt 1-2 Beath SSC
               Orchideeën 1-1 St. Bernadine Academical 	(1-1 AET, 1-4 PKs)
                      BSN 1-0 St. Bernadine Accountants
                      FZK 2-0 Achille Oranjestadt
               De Tike VF 1-6 McCunnald
   St. Bernadine Athletic 0-7 Standard Lily

Intercontinental Football
IFCF Group Stages

The 17th IFCF Champions League

The All-Blacks were the surprise package of the Champions League group stage, going unbeaten until the fifth fixture as they went head-to-head with some of the greats of intercontinental football and were not found wanting. Probably the highlight for all Raven fans - and one that will live long in the memory - would've been the fine 2-2 draw at the Bezirker Stadion against Raynor City United. If there was one team all fans hope for in the draw it has to be mighty RCU, and the dream of seeing them on the isle was enjoyed by a full house of 33,000 as the All-Blacks twice came from behind to record a surprise draw against the six-time champions. It was a different story in Raynor City of course, where a sound thrashing was administered for such impertinence. But incredibly this was Raven's only defeat of the series, and a third place finish ahead of CF Outineau means IFCF football continues with a place in the Challenger's Cup knockout rounds.

  Group D                                              P  W  D  L  GF  GA  GD  Pts    Myn    RCU    RvT    CFO
1  Myana                                         CMT   6  3  3  0  12   5   7  12      -     3-1    0-0    1-1  
2  Raynor City United                            VAL   6  2  2  2  13  13   0   8     1-4     -     5-1    2-2  
3  Raven Thöni                                   TAX   6  1  4  1   8  10  -2   7     1-1    2-2     -     3-1  
4  CF Outineau                                   KSK   6  0  3  3   7  12  -5   3     1-3    1-2    1-1     -

             Myana 0-0 Raven Thöni
       Raven Thöni 2-2 Raynor City United
       Raven Thöni 3-1 CF Outineau
       CF Outineau 1-1 Raven Thöni
Raynor City United 5-1 Raven Thöni
       Raven Thöni 1-1 Myana

The 17th IFCF Rising Stars Cup

With the kids invited to play in the Rising Stars Cup by virtue of the achievements of the seniors team, the under-21 side featuring talents like centreback Raphael Kaiser and young striker Jyrki Dolder showed they have what it takes and the future is bright for the All-Blacks, as the side went one better than their elders to finish second - ahead of RCU! - and progress into the knockout stages in their debut at this level.

Group D                                             P  W  D  L  GF  GA  GD  Pts    CFO    RTh    Mya    RCU
1  CF Outineau                                   KSK   6  3  2  1  16  10   6  11      -     3-3    1-2    4-3  
2  Raven Thöni                                   TAX   6  2  2  2  11  13  -2   8     0-2     -     2-1    2-2  
3  Myana U-18s                                   CMT   6  2  1  3  12  11   1   7 *   1-1    2-3     -     4-1  
4  Raynor City United                            VAL   6  2  1  3  13  18  -5   7 *   1-5    3-1    3-2     -   
Tie broken by head to head goal difference

by **Taxhavn** » Sun Jan 28, 2024 2:21 am

Season '91 Review
Part 3/3

The League
Round-by-round highlights to matchday 30

Match of the Round: 21
Tijhuis Archimedes 2-1 Raven Thöni
With the Accountants going down to a surprise defeat at 1860 Delénacht, the Owls go clear at the top as the season moves into the final phase, with history in their sights. The huge Oranjestadt Arena is packed to the rafters as the All-Blacks come to town in defence of their title, and a raucous crowd urges Archimedes on to a significant if narrow victory, Sami Samiii glorious in all his efforts, scoring one and making the other for Wim Menneken as Raven Thöni were put to the sword. The margin of victory hardly reflects the balance of play as fellow Vilitan Reino Thononen pulls off a string of saves to keep Raven in the game, but Luis Glücki's late goal is not enough. Owls flying, Ravens grounded.

SteuerLig-1
        FC Städeli 0-2 Stadler Works
    1860 Delénacht 2-0 St. Bernadine Accountants
               MAG 1-2 St. Bernardine Amateur
        Shakerssen 1-4 FZK
        De Tike VF 0-3 BSN
    Hauser & Kofel 0-4 St. Bernadine Athletic
     Standard Lily 6-0 Orchideeën
Tijhuis Archimedes 2-1 Raven Thöni

Match of the Round: 22
Tijhuis Archimedes 0-3 Standard Lily
Nelis Fijnwever's side came into the fearsome arena in Tijhuis knowing they really needed a big result here to keep their faltering challenege alive. The home fans sensed blood after seeing off the reigning champions the week before and some early pressure here, but a counter-attack started by Laurent Lapix and finishing with Natanaël Tanga getting the Pollen Counters in front less than ten minutes in seemed to deflate the crowd, and Standard took full advantage. Prolific Favr Mere Eljas Faliri put the vistors further ahead at the break and Raul Kopp added a third in the second half to keep Tijhuis in range. St. B Accountants also lose further ground with home defeat to FC Städeli, coacj BKL looking for a strong finish and a tilt at the title that seemed all but Tijhuis' to lose... and then they lost.

SteuerLig-1
St. Bernadine Accountants 2-4 FC Städeli
   St. Bernardine Amateur 2-2 Stadler Works
                      FZK 4-1 1860 Delénacht
                      BSN 3-0 MAG
   St. Bernadine Athletic 0-1 Shakerssen
               Orchideeën 3-1 De Tike VF
              Raven Thöni 1-2 Hauser & Kofel
       Tijhuis Archimedes 0-3 Standard Lily

Match of the Round: 23
MAG 1-5 Orchideeën
The Motozintla Auto Group Works Team only seem to get coverage when they get thrashed so here's another rout, this time by the Nurserymen who are quietly having a good season behind all the jostling for top amongst the louder teams. This young group of players probably won't get into the leading pack but they are not far behind and another interregional qualification looks on the cards - an outstanding achievement for coach Maurits-jan Veerenjans and his lads. Hirune Afmadu, Christian Lange-Parker (2), Gillis Würsten and Jeroen Blenkers were on the scoresheet as The Busmen had another miserable day of it.

SteuerLig-1
               FC Städeli 2-0 St. Bernardine Amateur
St. Bernadine Accountants 0-0 FZK
            Stadler Works 2-1 BSN
           1860 Delénacht 1-4 St. Bernadine Athletic
                      MAG 1-5 Orchideeën
               Shakerssen 1-1 Raven Thöni
               De Tike VF 1-2 Tijhuis Archimedes
           Hauser & Kofel 0-2 Standard Lily

Match of the Round: 24
Hauser & Kofel 2-6 De Tike VF
The Clockwork Orange & Blues win! It has only taken 24 rounds since the start of the season, and 25 if you include last season; but finally Dan Stappenbelt has got De Tike FC winning and it only took him personally four games to do it. Leading 3-2 with only injury time to play, the away team hit another three goals in seven extra minutes, no doubt the shackles off when they realised they were going to win. It is surely too little too late, although another six wins might just dig them out of a hole. Éric Tsukulu (2), Eelco Siero, Christiaan Scholte Meijerink (2) and Robert-Jan Vagevuur made a meal of it as Hauser & Kofel reminded everyone that but for De Tike's overall season, this could be a worry, and probably will be next season. Meanwhile Archimedes open up a little daylight at the top with a big win over - guess who? - MAG, while FC Städeli and Standard Lily drop points.

SteuerLig-1
                   FZK 1-1 FC Städeli
                   BSN 6-1 St. Bernardine Amateur
St. Bernadine Athletic 4-1 St. Bernadine Accountants
            Orchideeën 0-0 Stadler Works
           Raven Thöni 4-1 1860 Delénacht
    Tijhuis Archimedes 4-0 MAG
         Standard Lily 0-1 Shakerssen
        Hauser & Kofel 2-6 De Tike VF

Match of the Round: 25
St. Bernadine Accountants 0-3 Raven Thöni
This looks to be the end of Accountants surprise challenge at the top as they are well beaten by the champions, with the three leaders all winning and moving away from them. But for the All-Blacks, Bruce Hoogewarf's brace and a rare goal from Bors Warwick means Raven might still dare to dream that they could get their challenge back on track. Meanwhile, for the Accountants, a place in the Challenger's Cup is still possible if they can come together and not lose faith in coach Pirmin Wägeli, who has improved their fortunes beyond measure this season.

SteuerLig-1
               FC Städeli 5-0 BSN
                      FZK 0-3 St. Bernadine Athletic
   St. Bernardine Amateur 1-2 Orchideeën
St. Bernadine Accountants 0-3 Raven Thöni
            Stadler Works 0-4 Tijhuis Archimedes
           1860 Delénacht 0-3 Standard Lily
                      MAG 2-5 Hauser & Kofel
               Shakerssen 4-2 De Tike VF

Match of the Round: 26
Standard Lily 3-2 St. Bernadine Accountants
A must win for Standard Lily as they try to keep up with The Owls and The Frigates who are both beginning to show their relentless side in the final straight toward the title. It didn't come easy against a team who have punched above their weight all season, with Raul Kopp, Mere Eljas Faliri and Res Zweifel providing the goals and Laurent Lapix most of the passes in a super match at the Havnstadion.

SteuerLig-1
St. Bernadine Athletic 0-1 FC Städeli
            Orchideeën 4-1 BSN
           Raven Thöni 0-0 FZK
    Tijhuis Archimedes 4-1 St. Bernardine Amateur
         Standard Lily 3-2 St. Bernadine Accountants
        Hauser & Kofel 1-0 Stadler Works
            De Tike VF 4-1 1860 Delénacht
            Shakerssen 2-1 MAG

Match of the Round: 27
FC Städeli 4-2 Orchideeën
The title has surely gone for Standard, going down heavily at FZK, while De Tike FC go down more literally following the confirmation of their relegation. But the big game of the weekend was at Städeli Arena where the Frigates battled to a strong victory over the Nurserymen, who never gave them a moments peace or an inch of space. With Archimedes strolling to success at BSN, this was a vital test that FC Städeli came through impressively, to keep them hot on the heels of the Owls.

SteuerLig-1
               FC Städeli 4-2 Orchideeën
   St. Bernadine Athletic 0-4 Raven Thöni
                      BSN 1-4 Tijhuis Archimedes
                      FZK 4-1 Standard Lily
   St. Bernardine Amateur 1-1 Hauser & Kofel
St. Bernadine Accountants 2-2 De Tike VF              
            Stadler Works 3-1 Shakerssen
           1860 Delénacht 4-1 MAG

Match of the Round: 28
Tijhuis Archimedes 2-2 Orchideeën
A wobble from the Owls! Things tighten right up at the top in what is now a two-horse race, with FC Städeli closing the gap to a single point and Tijhuis visiting the Städeli Arena next week in what looks like it could be a winner take all clash. But in this, the second leg of this season's Oranjiklassieker, honours were even and Archimedes just could not get past an Orchideeën side out for revenge after being thrashed in their home leg of this classic. It is not the worst result in the world - go to Städeli next week and win, the title is theirs - and if they don't, well, the Frigates have still got to get past Standard Lily in Havn on the final week. Even so, Archimedes finished this game knowing BKL's team are really breathing down their necks now.

SteuerLig-1
       Raven Thöni 0-2 FC Städeli
Tijhuis Archimedes 2-2 Orchideeën
     Standard Lily 1-0 St. Bernadine Athletic
    Hauser & Kofel 1-3 BSN
        De Tike VF 2-4 FZK
        Shakerssen 0-1 St. Bernardine Amateur
               MAG 1-6 St. Bernadine Accountants
    1860 Delénacht 0-2 Stadler Works

Match of the Round: 29
FC Städeli 2-1 Tijhuis Archimedes
In the right place at the right time, with three minutes to go, Nepharan veteran midfielder Lothaire Cromwell struck a heartbreak winner for the Frigates, usurping their place at the top of the table with only one more match to play, and knocking them off the top for the first time in ten weeks. There could be no bigger game than the one at a rammed and wild Städeli Arena, with Aaron Brechbühler giving the home side an early advantage before Eduardo Mendoza equalised for the Owls. But BKL's Frigates were not to be denied, and Cromwell timed a beautiful late raid into the Archimedes box to perfection, smashing home what might just be the title decider. But hold that thought - it's the Westernklassiker next, Lily at home to the Frigates, and they will not want to let this team win on their own turf. Meanwhile Archimedes, two points behind, will still fancy themselves with a game at Hauser & Kofel. It could come down to goal difference if FC Städeli manage only a draw in Havn, and it will need a big swing - ten goals to be precise. In this crazy season though it's not impossible to imagine.

SteuerLig-1
               FC Städeli 2-1 Tijhuis Archimedes
              Raven Thöni 4-3 Standard Lily
               Orchideeën 7-1 Hauser & Kofel
   St. Bernadine Athletic 4-6 De Tike VF
                      BSN 3-0 Shakerssen
                      FZK 3-1 MAG
   St. Bernardine Amateur 1-2 1860 Delénacht
St. Bernadine Accountants 1-0 Stadler Works

Match of the Round: 30
Standard Lily 2-5 FC Städeli
FC Städeli are champions! Tijhuis Archimedes, anticipating needing a huge swing in goal difference to have a chance of making history, did their part with a 7-0 thrashing of Hauser & Kofel; but in the end it counted for nothing as a majestic FC Städeli, already anticipating another meeting with Standard Lily next week in the cup final, never looked in doubt of losing this one with a magnificent win in the Westernklassiker. Martin Picasso struck twice in the first twenty minutes to give the Frigates a lead which they never surrendered. Linard Sutter, Aaron Brechbühler and Till Haid hit further goals on a chastening afternoon for the Pollen Counters. Where sweeter than to win your first title in seven years than at the home of your deadliest rivals, scoring five goals in the process?

SteuerLig-1
            Standard Lily 2-5 FC Städeli
           Hauser & Kofel 0-7 Tijhuis Archimedes
               De Tike VF 1-1 Raven Thöni
               Shakerssen 0-2 Orchideeën
                      MAG 1-4 St. Bernadine Athletic
           1860 Delénacht 1-1 BSN
            Stadler Works 4-3 FZK
St. Bernadine Accountants 2-1 St. Bernardine Amateur

SteuerLig-1 Final Standings
BKL Guides Elders To The Title

It took Quebecois head coach Bradley Kemerer-Lascelles a full season to get used to the quality of the SteuerLig - several notches below where he was used to working - but when he did, he turned his team of veterans into champions. And when I say veterans, even by the standards of this veteran-filled 'walking football' league, this is an old team. Josif Rothacher, the 22-year old starting rightback, looks positively child-like in this team where only mad goalkeeper Ivan Klank, at 27, is also under 30. The team looked like it needed refreshing at the end of last season but BKL stuck with his old boys and this season they played out of their wrinkled skins for him, coming strong in the last third of the season to overhaul Tijhuis Archimedes in the final stretch - including that memorable victory over the Owls on matchday 29 to go top and then in the Westernklassiker on the final day of the season, when unflappable old heads for pressure-cooker environments were the order of the day. Defenders Sanno Walder and Guy Kòsi, both 33, midfielders Tanica Darr Qib 'iithli, 37, Lothaire Cromwell, 36 and Till Haid, 33, and strikers Aaron Brechbühler, 33 and Martim Picasso, 35 certainly had enough experience to see the job done, and done in style.

Tijhuis Archimedes, only just promoted, led through most of the season and will be broken not to have become the first newly-promoted team to win the title, missing out by 2 points and falling off top spot with only one game left to recover. They didn't. A super strong team led by the veteran Vilitan trio of Mikaela Äijälä, Sami Samiii and Riku Kasslin, they will have enough quality to challenge again next season, but will they have the mental strength to recover from such a near miss this time around? Three-in-a-row champions Raven Thöni give up their title in disappointing circumstances, missing out on IFCF football altogether after doing so well in the Champions League and sweating on the FFI play-offs for any interregional football at all. It will be something of a disaster for them if they miss out. Speaking of disasters, De Tike FC's season was one long, slow, car crash as they drop into the second tier after a disastrous run of 23 games without a win, threatening to break the record for the worst ever season. The late appointment of Dan Stappenbelt turned the tide slightly, enough at least to avoid that unwanted record.

SteuerLig-1 Final Standings


    Team                            P   W  D   L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 FC Städeli                     30  18  8   4  83  35  +48  62  IFCF Champions League; Cup Winners Cup; FFI League of Victors
  2 Tijhuis Archimedes             30  18  6   6  88  46  +42  60  IFCF Challenger's Cup; FFI League of Victors 
  3 Standard Lily                  30  17  4   9  83  48  +35  55  IFCF Challenger's Cup; FFI Confederations Trophy Play-Offs
  4 Orchideeën                     30  15  8   7  67  47  +20  53  IFCF Challenger's Cup; FFI Confederations Trophy Play-Offs 
  5 Raven Thöni                    30  13 10   7  64  44  +20  49  FFI Confederations Trophy Play-Offs 
  6 St. Bernadine Accountants      30  15  4  11  65  54  +11  49  FFI Confederations Trophy Play-Offs (qualified)
  7 BSN                            30  14  6  10  57  45  +12  48
  8 FZK                            30  12  8  10  53  43  +10  44
  9 Shakerssen                     30  14  1  15  54  59   -5  43
 10 St. Bernadine Athletic         30  12  5  13  67  52  +15  41
 11 Stadler Works                  30  10  8  12  40  60  -20  38
 12 St. Bernardine Amateur         30  11  3  16  42  51   -9  36
 13 MAG                            30   8  4  18  38  88  -50  28
 14 Hauser & Kofel                 30   7  5  18  38  78  -40  26
 15 1860 Delénacht                 30   6  7  17  34  81  -47  25  
 16 De Tike VF                     30   3  7  20  34  76  -42  16  Relegated

In the play-offs for the second FFI Confederations Trophy place, Pirmin Wägeli's experience paid off as he led the Accountants to a first ever interregional qualification courtesy of surprise victories over Standard Lily and Orchideeën, who both have Challengers Cup entries to console themselves. For the Accountants it seems just reward for a surprisingly good season, at one point leading the way with Tijhuis Archimedes and only fading in the last few weeks from what looked like it could be a surprise title challenge. Disaster indeed for Raven Thöni though, who miss out on interregional football altogether and will be worrying now about retaining some of their better players. After all the good work building up their coefficients in the last two competitions, they will be cursing throwing it away with a patchy domestic season.

FFI Confederations Trophy Play-Offs

           Standard Lily 0-1 St. Bernadine Accountants
              Orchideeën 3-2 Raven Thöni

FFI Confederations Trophy Play-Off Final
at The Athletic Club, St. Bernadine

St. Bernadine Accountants 0-0 Orchideeën	(0-0 AET, 5-4 PKs)

Orping Small Arms works team, OSA, make an immediate return to the top flight following their surprise relegation last season, and will be joined by VF Romainring, who avoided an eighth promotion play-off and probably an eighth promotion play-off elimination. They are joined in this expansion season of 1-down 3-up by St. Bernadine Academical, who justify their inclusion in the league for the first time with an immediate promotion, and a great run in the cup. Controversies swirling around why they of all teams were picked without a vote to join the league with the Kozakken Boys expulsion seem to have dried up when the quality of their team, including World Cup winner Onun Tasher, turned out to be pretty good, all things considered.

SteuerLig-2 Final Standings


    Team                           P   W  D   L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 OSA                           30  23  4   3  95  47  +48  73  Promoted; IFCF Liga B Champions Trophy
  2 VF Romainring                 30  18  4   8  73  43  +30  58  Promoted; IFCF Liga B Champions Trophy
  3 Benson Foxes                  30  16  6   8  52  41  +11  54  Promotion Play-Offs; IFCF Liga B Champions Trophy
  4 St. Bernadine Academical      30  15  5  10  81  59  +22  50  Promotion Play-Offs; Promoted
  5 Urban Irminger                30  14  5  11  58  48  +10  47  Promotion Play-Offs
  6 HPV                           30  14  5  11  70  66   +4  47  Promotion Play-Offs
  7 Schwänenclub                  30  13  4  13  62  34  +28  43
  8 Beath SSC                     30  11 10   9  44  37   +7  43
  9 Löwen Bessandorf              30  12  7  11  58  56   +2  43
 10 Axis Driessche                30  12  6  12  44  37   +7  42
 11 McCunnald                     30  12  6  12  48  50   -2  42
 12 VF Merzburg                   30  11  8  11  49  50   -1  41
 13 Roterlicht Knokschäft         30   6  8  16  44  75  -31  26
 14 Immenmold                     30   6  6  18  38  72  -34  24
 15 Tulip Maartenstadt            30   6  4  20  36  83  -47  22
 16 Achille Oranjestadt           30   4  6  20  28  82  -54  18

Promotion Play-Offs

            Benson Foxes 0-1 HPV
St. Bernadine Academical 3-1 Urban Irminger

Promotion Play-Off Final
at The Athletic Club, St. Bernadine

St. Bernadine Academical 2-1 HPV

TaxPokal
The League Member's Knockout Competition

Match of the Round: QF
St. Bernadine Academical 1-2 St. Bernadine Amateur
A potential fairytale comes to an end in a rare St. Bernadine derby featuring Academical. Since the inclusion of University student and world cup winner Onun Tasher from the Delte valley, this team have gone from strength to strength, eventually winning promotion to the top flight and earning a place in the last eight of the inaugural TaxPokal. Drawn against city rivals Amateur at home they were dreaming of what might be, but while they were doing that, Adam Ackeret's Lig-1 professionals were preparing for a first class display of control and patience to see them through to the last four. Sea Domer Amblix hit the first for The Gentleman Footballers, and winger Neil Lützelschwab making sure of the win before the Academicals got a late consolation.

Semi Finals
FZK 0-3 FC Städeli
at Plantation Field, Maartenstadt
The clash of two foreign managers here at the FZK Stadion where Sea Domer home coach Koordinator Satrioy had turned the Barrel Rollers season around markedly since being threatened with the sack. But at the sharp end of the season with a cup and league double a distinct possibility, Quebecois head coach Bradley Kemerer-Lascelles, BKL, really had his Frigates coming into fine form and there was no resisting them on the day, Lothaire Cromwell (NPH), Aaron Brechbühler and Martim Picasso (PFA) with the goals as FC Städeli booked a huge first final date with big southern rivals Standard.

Standard Lily 1-0 St. Bernadine Amateur
at The Sept-Nat Stadion, St. Bernadine
Nelis Fijnewever led the Pollen Counters into the first TaxPokal final in a tough game against the hopeful St. Bernadine Amateur, to set up a Westenklassiker clash with rivals FC Städeli; both teams hoping to be playing for an historic double although that seems a bit of a stretch for Standard, having fallen behind in the league. Laurent Lapix (RCN) got the winner for Standard in a tense game between two nervous-looking sides, also winning a player of the match award for running the midfield as he has all season. Not that this game was up to his best standards, with Amateur playing a disruptive tactic well and Jurian van Enk going toe-to-toe with the young Reçueçian star, not allowing him his usual flowing football. Nevertheless Lapix adapted well to maintain control of the game, albeit with more spit and less polish than we expect of him.

TaxPokal Final
FC Städeli 4-0 Standard Lily
at The Athletic Club, St. Bernadine
Having sealed the title the week before, BKL and his team were determined to grab a first TaxPokal shield as well to conclude a brilliant season, and they did it in fine style as Standard simply ran out of steam. Nelis Fijnewever's side came into the game on the back of losing out in the league and crashing out of FFI competitions with a couple of chastening results, and the young manager could not rouse them sufficiently for this huge clash with their confidence already at a low ebb. Instead, two early goals from the Frigates shattered them, and ruined Fijnewever's game plan as Geektopian captain Tanica Darr Qib 'iithli and Aaron Brechbühler got FC Städeli off to a flying start. Standard never looked in it after that and Laurent Lapix, so often the Pollen Counter's talisman this season, cut a despairing figure before being substituted on the hour mark. But that didn't help Standard's cause as Nepharan Lothaire Cromwell was given free reign in midfield without Lapix to hinder him, and he set up two further goals for Brechbühler and Poaf veteran striker Martin Picasso to secure a big win and a big double for FC Städeli.

Viertelfinale

               FC Städeli 4-0 McCunnald
                Beath SSC 0-1 FZK
                      BSN 0-1 Standard Lily
 St. Bernadine Academical 1-2 St. Bernadine Amateur

Halbfinale

                      FZK 0-3 FC Städeli
            Standard Lily 1-0 St. Bernadine Amateur

Pokalfinale

               FC Städeli 4-0 Standard Lily

Interregional Football
IFCF Group Stages & FFI Competitions

The 17th IFCF Challengers Cup

Finally the All-Blacks' IFCF jolly came to an end at the hands of serious interregional heavyweights Kingsgrove of Brenecia, narrowly losing out over two legs in the round of 32. Raven's second season in the interregionals has been a huge success as Taxhavn clubs find their footing at this level, and the only tragedy is the total cost of this tour on the squad has resulted in a disappointing domestic season which means they will miss out altogether next season. Coach Jovin Strähl will surely be looking at the size of his squad and talking to the owners about getting more recruits in for future campaigns, though that won't be an issue next season. Perhaps the lack of interregional football next season will play to their advantage as FC Städeli, Standard Lily, Tijhuis Archimedes and Orchideeën will have to cope with plenty of extra games, assuming they perform well in their various competition entries.

Round of 32
(TAX)  Raven Thöni  0–1  Kingsgrove  (BRE)   0–1   0–0

The 16th FFI League of Victors

Bouyed by their outstanding performance in the IFCF competitions, Raven Thöni would've been hopeful of a run in the League of Victors too and indeed made impressive progress to the quarterfinals where they were arrested by Juvencans AC Pomena, ending a total of 22 additional games in interregional football over the season. No wonder they were exhausted by the end of the SteuerLig.

For Standard Lily, an early thrashing by Finn Hurps in the round of 32 was a huge disappointment. Several players reported dreaming of winning the trophy the night before their first fixture, and everyone at the club seemed absolutely certain they would lift the title, a first interregional championship for any Taxhavn club. They even talked of specific results and the glory of a big final win. But it was all imaginary. In truth, the Pollen Counters were pretty hapless against the Trollborgians, and found themselves very quickly banished to the Confederations Trophy. Such wasted dreams! Such vivid imaginations come to nothing!

Round of 32[/b]
(TAX)   Raven Thöni   3–1   PSS Selaparang    (CKR)   1–1   2–0 
(TRL)   Finn Hurps    5–0   Standard Lily     (TAX)   4–0   1–0

Round of 16[/b]
(TAX)   Raven Thöni   4–1   Tsear FC          (SAT)   1–0   3–1 

QuarterFinal[/b]
(TAX)   Raven Thöni   0–3   AC Pomena         (JUE)   0–2   0–1

The 16th FFI Confederations Trophy

Lily's dreamers continued their intercontinental nightmare having dropped down into the Confederations Trophy and going out in the round of 32 with a comprehensive defeat to, err, U 2 Luv. These foreign types and their strange sounding clubs! Orchideeën at least managed to get into the final sixteen before being easily dispatched by Rey Utarwalin, concluding an ultimately disappointing showing by Taxhavn clubs in the FFI this season.

Round of 32[/b]
(TAX)   Orchideeën      2–1   PSS Selaparang    (CKR)   1–1   1–0 
(TAX)   Standard Lily   2–6   U 2 Luv           (CHA)   1–4   1–2 

Round of 16[/b]
(KAN)   Rey Utarwalin   6–0   Orchideeën        (TAX)   4–0   2–0

The 17th IFCF Rising Stars Cup

Young Mytanjar striker Blaz Kovacic, banging them in for the All-Blacks in the SteuerLig this season, was in the executive box in Ararat to watch his club-mates from the youth team finally end an impressive run in the Rising Stars tournament with defeat in his home country. Nevertheless it's a promising development for the SteuerLig that a youth team did so well in IFCF competition, and hopes are building that the influx of foreign vets on their last legs will at least have the effect of helping to bring through some promising youngsters eager to learn from their experienced seniors.

Play-offs
(MYT)   Ararat   3–1   Raven Thöni   (TAX)

Season Awards
SteuerLig season 91

Golden Ball: Player of The Season
Valentin Fey (Raven Thöni)
The only non-foreigner in the main awards, the young winger may be seen as something of a surprise inclusion considering his side's disappointing 5th-placed finish in the league. But the All-Blacks were in and amongst it until fading at the end, by which time they had played about 20 games more than most in the league due to their brilliant interregional exploits. And throughout all, it was Valentin Fey impressing the most to deservedly win the Golden Ball. Playing every minute of every match, he was probably the most influential in most of those minutes too, and when he looked tired on rare ocassions, his team played poorly. Lost under the headlines of missing out on interregionals next season, we may have seen the emergence of the best Taxhavnite player in a generation.

Golden Boot: Top Scorer
Mere Eljas Faliri (FFD) (Standard Lily)
While it was the Vilitan-powered Tijhuis who scored the most goals overall in the league, it was a Farv who hit the most goals personally for third-placed Standard Lily. Twice scoring five goals in a match and hitting another three hattricks, the free-signing youn striker was unstoppable and looks an absolute bargain for Nelis Fijnwever's Lily. While there is a general feeling of disappointment this season in how the Pollen Counters finished empty-handed, there must be some excitement to see what Faliri can do with the excellent Laurent Lapix behind him next season.

Golden Glove: Keeper of The Season
Ivan Klank (XAN) (FC Städeli)
A brilliant season at the back generally for the league and cup double winners was underscored by the performances of eccentric Xannerian keeper affectionately known as 'The Klank' at the Städeli Arena, who was outstanding between the sticks, keeping the most clean sheets and holding the goals against tally considerably lower than anyone else's. He's a complete lunatic of course and that makes him a worry sometimes with his antics and positioning, but despite that, and probably because of that, he always seems to do the right thing at the right moments. Brilliant and hilarious in equal measure, he would be thrown in the sea if he wasn't so good.

Golden Visa: Foreigner of The Season
Sami Samiii (VIL) (Tijhuis Archimedes)
It was never going to be anyone else, was it? Perhaps Laurent Lapix at Standard, who certainly ran him close, but the Vilitan was supreme all season as The Owls almost won an historical title, narrowly blowing it at the end of the season when they would've been the first team to win a title in their first season after promotion. Instrumental in everything good at Tijhuis Archimedes - and there was plenty of good on offer - the winger never dipped in his performance and never showed the slightest of emotions when being barracked roundly from all quarters at every ground when the issue of fair play was raised. His answer was on the field of play, and more often than not he silenced his critics. By the end of the season the abuse had mostly disappeared to be replaced by rounds of admiration and regret that he wasn't on the opponents team. A brilliant season by a player head and shoulders above anyone else in the league.

Golden Pram: Youth Player of The Season
Blaz Kovacec (MYT) (Raven Thöni)
For the second season in a row the young Mytanjian striker at the All-Blacks stands out as the best young player (under 21) with his assured performances in a mixed season for Raven. Brilliant in the interregionals, and brilliant in domestic football even when his team were less so, the boy already seems like an old hand and you have to wonder if he will stick around now the All-Blacks are facing a season with no interregional football. BKL at FC Städeli needs to freshen up his Champions League qualifiers for a start, and teams watching this season's group games featuring an impressive Raven Thöni surely cannot have missed his importance in some excellent showings. With this second Golden Pram, Kovacic also becomes the first player in the SteuerLig to lift two gongs in separate seasons the fledgling award ceremony (Bors Warwick won no less than three gongs in one season last year).

End of Season Full Awards

Golden Ball (Best Player): Valentin Fey, 22, Raven Thöni
Golden Boot (Top Scorer): Mere Eljas Faliri (FFD), 25, Standard Lily
Golden Glove (Best Keeper): Ivan Klank (XAN), 27, FC Städeli
Golden Visa (Best Foreigner): Sami Samiii (VIL), 31, Tijhuis Archimedes
Golden Blanket (Best Midfielder): Laurent Lapix (RCN), 22, Standard Lily
Golden Brick (Best Defender): Sanno Walder, 33, FC Städeli
Golden Pram (Best Young Player): Blaz Kovacec (MYT), 19, Raven Thöni (2nd award)
Golden Stick (Best Veteran): Lothaire Cromwell (NPH), 36, FC Städeli
Golden Tracksuit (Best Head Coach): BKL (Bradley Kemerer-Lascelles) (QUE), 55, FC Städeli
Wooden Spoon (A Season To Forget): Rudie Mellema, 38, former coach at De Tike FC

by **Taxhavn** » Tue Feb 13, 2024 2:38 am

Sixteen Bits ai gen-assisted

Season '92*
Begins Here

*With no agreed universal or multiversal calendar, and the Isle working on multiple calendars itself due to its various critical connections around the worlds, football uses the UICA calendar to keep track of historical data - though there has never been a time when the leagues entered the international club competitions until now. Further, to avoid confusion following the changeover to IFCF and restarting the count, UICA timekeeping is still applied with the new IFCF time appended in some records.

Reigning Champions:	FC Städeli
Cup Holders:		FC Städeli

IFCF Tourists:		FC Städeli, Tijhuis Archimedes, Standard Lily, Orchideeën
FFI Tourists:		FC Städeli, Tijhuis Archimedes, St.Bernadine Accountants
Newly Promoted:		OSA, VF Romainring, St.Bernadine Academical

Star Signing:		Aslak Hrafninnson (PIS) (Orchideeën)
World Cup Winners:	Tai Cerotha, Danny Mastorqa (St.Bernadine Athletic)
			Burus Tasher (FC Städeli), Onun Tasher (St.Bernadine Academical)
One to Watch:		Filip–Alekso Stojkov (MYT) (1860 Delénacht)

by **Taxhavn** » Tue Feb 13, 2024 2:41 am

Transfer Ticker
Season '92

Raven Thöni

…head coach Jovin Strähl, 41, signs a two season contract extension
…Vilitan goalkeeper Reino Kononen, 30, will not extend his contract past next season
…goalkeeper Ramon Buck, 40, retires to take up a coaching role with the club
…defender Adrian Burkhard, 37, announces plans to retire after next season
…star Nepharan defender Bors Warwick, 37, signs a one-season contract extension
…striker Bruce Hoogewarf (BRO), 32, signs a new contract for three more seasons
…Taxhavn's brightest prospect, winger Valentin Fey, 22, signs new five-season contract
…striker Isak Eberhard, 26, transfer listed and sold to St.B Academical for an undisclosed fee
…young defensive midfielder Nils Schneider, 20, of the Rising Stars Cup team, promoted to first team role along with youth defenders Jodie Niederhauser, 19, and Raphael Kaiser, 18.
…Raven go young again with another Myt, Dančo Saev, 18, signed on a free from Nyva Zvornik

Standard

…centrehalf & captain Chance Benton (GRU), 33, runs down his contract and leaves the club to the international market; signed for Skipsbyggere IFK in the Polar Islandstates
…rightback Freidolin Spiess, 26, signs new four-season deal
…centreback Nando Balsiger, 34, plans to retire at the end of next season
…defensive midfielder Rafael Dorer, 30, has requested a transfer after losing his place to Laurent Lapix, sold to BSN
…Standard move for Archimedes' young defender Thies Strijdveen, signing him for ₸x3m
…perhaps a record for a backup signing, goalkeeper Thijs Nijen Twilhaar comes in from relegated De Tike FC for ₸x3m
…right winger and Mytanijar former national teamer Vusur Rajovic, 29, signs for free from Chenoworth Harriers in Nephara - an excellent bit of business

FC Städeli

…head coach BKL signs a new contract that will keep him at the club for six seasons
…rightback Josif Rothacher, 23, declines new contract to leave on a free for OSA
…midfielder Jibril Benzema, 40, and forward Gertjan van de Schuur, 41, retire to coaching staff
…young midfielder Jockel Schmidt, 19 and striker Friedolin Grämer, 21, transfered to affiliate Stadler Works for undisclosed fees
…BKL moves quickly for wantaway star defender Töbe Aerle, 20, signed for a domestic record ₸x5m from St.B Athletic
…leftback Simone Imbach, 27, signed from newly promoted Academical for ₸x2m
…Squorn right winger Milovan Antic, 27, signs from Carelton Park Rangers in Xanneria for a bargain ₸x500k
…World Cup-winning defensive midfielder Burus Tasher, 20, signs on a free from Oswark Town for his first professional contract, would you believe; his younger brother Onun is also in the league at St.Bernadine Academical

St.Bernadine Athletic

…Bonesea winger Earl Kynance, 42, retires
…midfielder Samuel Hodel, 34, released - signs as player-coach at 2nd tier Achille Oranjistadt
…star centreback Töbe Aerle, 20, has put in a transfer request after 2 seaons at the club, signs for champions FC Städeli
…he will be replaced at the back by another young hot prospect from the youth team, Purlie Stöckli
…leftback Raul Inäbnit, 23, has declined a new contract with only a season left on his current one
…but Mustardo centrehalf Vincent Aury, 31, has extended for another four seasons
…Deltic world cup winners Danny Mastorqa and Tai Cerotha have both signed extensions after speculation
…Ipaneman fullback Arpinho signs on a free transfer from neighbours St. Bernadine Accountants
…Starsian left winger Lucius Fangborne, 23, signs on a free from Equinox United (TFS)
…Athletic turn to veteran Wightling manager Horatio Limit, 64, previously managing at Axis Driessche in the second tier
…Limit signs Myt winger Mirko Hranilovic, 28, from FC Corvistonein Nephara on a free, and having 35 caps in his locker means he will bring plenty to the league as its quality of imports improves season on season

St. Bernadine Accountants

…Ipaneman leftback Arpinho, 29, leaves on a free after not renewing contract; moves to St. B. Athletic
…veteran defender Pirmin Kellersberger, 41, joins the coaching staff
…Squorn striker Serdar Admiri, 26, leaves after declining new contract after only one season, signs on a free for Lìjû in Pasarga
…defender Julian Spühler, 22, gets a new five-season contract
…signed Tamarindian striker Eduardo Mendoza, 30, from Tijhuis, for ₸x3.5m
…leftback Jurrijn op Sonnebeld, 19, declined contract at relegated De Tike FC, snapped up on a free

St. Bernadine Amateur

…left fullback Maxime Hug, 37, set to retire at the end of next season
…reserve left fullback Flurin Lamprecht, 21, released & signs for BSN
…right fullback Rayan Schiefer, 30, declines contract renewal, will see out his current contract
…Sea Domer Amblix, 23, will leave on a free transfer after also declining a renewal
…striker Uto Lippuner, 24, will step up from reserve to replace them and gets a new three-season contract
…Zenegalese Souaïbou Mukongo, 22, wins contract extension as new first choice winger
…signed defender Ton Masseus, 27, from relegated De Tike FC for ₸x500k

BSN

…manager Nelo Holzer, 50, is fired after two seasons in charge; he goes to MAG
…captain and leftback Weinert Marggi, 38, retires
…striker Jvars Greber, 25, leaves at the end of his contract, declining a renewal, and signs for Tijhuis Archimedes
…Squorn keeper Alimayu Shiben, 34, renews for another five seasons
…star striker Paulie Morf, 32, also renews, for an extra three seasons
…striker Jovin Eichenberger, 22, is transfer-listed and sold to OSA
…signed hot prospect fullback Jonas Spori out of Shakerssen's youth team
…fans shocked as veteran manager Reto Ehrensperger, 66, rehired after being sacked three seasons ago
…defensive midfielder Rafael Dorer, 30, signed from Standard Lily, for ₸x3.5m
…Gnejsian striker Georg Bardo, 28, signed for free from Dalströmma BK (PUG)
…leftback Flurin Lamprecht, 21, signed on a free from St. Bernadine Amateur

FZK

…captain and leftback Lionel Benz, 38, announces retirement at the end of next season
…Sea Domer centrehalf Tsujii, 22, renews contract for four more seasons
…defensive midfielder Jacinto Gempeler, 26, hands in transfer requestand & signs for 1860 Delénacht for ₸x275k
…Skufi tribe royal family member Maksim Skufi, 30, signed on a free from Kanmerese club Gardwalin
…coach Koordinator Satripy wants to stack the club with familiar souls and signs free agent striker Amblix, 23, after they ran down their contract at St. Bernadine Amateur
…Oliver Heiniger, 29, moves to Schwänenclub to make room, for a fee of ₸x200k

Tijhuis Archimedes

…star striker Eduardo Mendoza, 30, declines a new contract and will be sold before he becomes a free agent; signs for St.Bernadine Accountants for ₸x3.5m
…Vilitan midfielder Riku Kasslin, 32, also declines, but the Owls will wait to see if they can change his mind
…incredibly, defender Thies Strijdveen, 22, joins the rebels by declining a contract, and will be sold to Standard Lily for a handsome ₸x3m
…The Owls console themselves by getting the bargain of the off-season, striker Jvars Greber as a free agent from BSN
…young Semar goalkeeper Marco Monzo, 19, signs on a free from Sporting Solsholm in Semarland as backup to Morten Gallis

Shakerssen

…head coach Hänggi Rüfenacht, 44, steps down at the end of his contract
…club heroes Nino Brawand, 39, and Emiel Uunks, 41, both retire. Uunks will join the coaching staff
…club captain and striker Zubi Zuberbühler, 25, declines a new contract until the manager position is resolved
…young winger Andrae Kocher, 21, is made available for transfer, signs for newly-promoted VF Romainring
…youth prospect Jonas Spori, 20, has a falling out in negotiating his first senior contract, and leaves to join BSN on a free
…Squorn defender Tifon Palawan signs after being released from Targas City in Pasarga
…big signing - veteran Ko-orenite Sid Plundell, 33, released from Chester Triumph in Southwest Eastnorth
…right winger Robert-Jan Vagevuur, 21, signed from relegated De Tike FC for ₸x1.5m
…extra-veteran former Squorn national team manager Heldir Zaman, 68, moves from a successful spell at Brantisvogan in the Remnant States to add character and years to the colourful Shakers
…club captain Zubi Zuberbühler, 25, signs a new 4-season contract now the manager position is resolved
…the new manager uses his considerable experience to persuade veteran Farf striker Porofirio Benitez, 35, to sign on a free from FC Kolberg in Semarland; he signs on as player-coach

1860 Delénacht

…veteran midfielder Saturnin Barrios (TAM), 36, has a change of heart and renews contract at the last minute
…rightback Beath Von Mühlenen, 22, leaves at the end of his contract
…midfielder Jacinto Gempeler, 26, signs from FZK for ₸x275k
…young winger Filip–Alekso Stojkov (MYT), 18, signs on a free from Nyva Zvornik's academy

OSA

…defensive midfielder Giel Ossenkoppele, 19, wins new 3-season contract
…rightback Josif Rothacher, 23, signed as a free agent from FC Städeli
…striker Jovin Eichenberger, 22, signed from BSN for ₸x2.2m
…defender Ruven Von Mühlenen, 27, signed for a nominal fee from Roterlicht Knockschäft

Hauser & Kofel

…the works team will rebrand next season to HKB Merzberg, in an effort to draw in more Merzbergians
…coach Reto Ehrensperger, 66, leaves by mutual consent
…striker Guus Mensink, 32, signs new long-term contract
…signed De Tike FC prospect Stijn Wolthuis, 19, a right midfielder, on a one year loan
…HKB appoint Hänggi Rüfenacht, 44, after leaving Shakerssen

Stadler Works

…winger Abi Lobsiger, 38, retires
…young fullbacks Reinoute ten Cate, 20, and Theo Greber, 22, both sign new contracts through to season '97
…defensive midfielder Ramun Friedrich, 38, will retire at the end of next season
…second-string Costelloan fullback Barone Calerara, 22, declines a new contract
…transfer in two young players - midfielder Jockel Schmidt, 19, and forward Friedolin Grämer, 21 - from senior affiliate FC Städeli
…centrehalf Jos Uilken, 33, signed from relegated De Tike FC for ₸x150k

MAG

…popular young head coach Nanko Kijk in 't Veld, 37, will leave the club, after his contract expired
…goalkeeper Steef van't Roth, 22, signs a new contract for five seasons
…veteran Ipaneman rightback Alfredo Neves, 40, will retire at the end of next season
…winger Mart-jan Woker, 22, declined a new contract and will run down his current one with a season left
…winger Ard Elbersen, 31, has made a similar decision
…signed young striker Martijn Hagedooren from Kierhuizen Boys for ₸x350k
…former BSN & Standard Lily manager Nelo Holzer is signed as head coach, considered a surprise coup

Orchideeën

…star rightback Laurens 'VW' Kamperman, 21, signs a new 4-season contract
…attacking midfielder Reggy van Buiten, 24, signs a two-season extension to his current deal
…striker Gillis Würsten, 29, signs a new 5-season contract
…young striker Walter Timmerhendricks, 21, signs a two-season extension
…defensive midfielder Lennaert Vrielink, 31, is signed from Kierhauizen Boys for ₸x5m to add vital experience
…the Nurserymen make the most expensive, and possibly the most exciting, foreign signing of the window, bring in Polarian centreback Aslak Hrafninnsson, 26, from SK Nasjonale Hauker for ₸x2m.

St. Bernadine Academical

…rightback Simone Imbach, 27, submitted a transfer request after contract negotiations stalled
…Portmuthian striker Benjamin Young, 32, signs a new three-season contract
…while his strike partner Göpf Hochmuth, 22, signed a one-year extension on his current deal
…winger Evan Schürmann, 24, declined to renew his contract, and will see out his final year
…rightback Beath Von Mühlenen, 22, brought in on a free from 1860 Delénacht to replace Imbach
…striker Isak Eberhard, 26, signed from Raven Thöni for an undisclosed fee

VF Romainring

…head coach Nouhoum Ouedraogo (MAK), 64, surprisingly announces he will not renew his contract and will retire at the end of next season
…one for the future - young Gouvanarch prodigy Miliav de la Tombe, 17, signed on a free from Akademiezh Mell-Droad Gouvanarch
…young winger Andrae Kocher, 21, signs from Shakerssen for ₸x200k

by **Taxhavn** » Tue Feb 13, 2024 2:50 am

Off-Season Headlines
Season '92

Old men with accountants, angry letter-writers, market share analysts and rebranding departments... it's all happening on the Isle of Taxhavn in the downtime between FC Städeli's season '91 and [insert future champion, probably Tijhuis Archimedes, here]'s season '92.

My Little Polarian

While the initial craze for signing old men on free transfers for crazy wages has slowed considerably and the league is still failing to attract top line footballers even though the wages are brilliant (the theory goes it would just take double-World Cup winner Climo Coss to come over and everyone will follow), nevertheless there have been some wins. The league now has a Krytenian, some Nepharans, the Vilitans (many say that doesn't count) and now - a Polarian. National team defender Aslak Hrafninnsson, 26, has signed for Orchideeën.

At ₸x2m the fee doesn't come close to the $illy money paid for Laurent Lapix last season, but that was definitely a private behind-closed-doors kind of arrangement and if you discount that, Aslak joins for the most money spent by a Taxhavn club on the open market. Principals in the league are disappointed that Orchideeën didn't take the opportunity to ridiculously overpay, suggesting that future transfers should be at least 100% higher than the asking price in principle, just to show off.

In fact, to the great frustration of FA-Tax and the SteuerLig, this seems to have been a signing of remarkably good value, by canny negotiators at the Nurserymen's club. Perhaps in competition with the ageing Nepharan Bors Warwick at Raven Thöni, but with more mileage for the future, Aslak is probably the best defender in the league, and comes to a club on the up, looking to invert the disappointment this season of finishing behind deadly rivals Tijhuis Archimedes.

Frustrated at the price tag or no, the league want more Aslaks in future seasons and will be looking to the Nurserymen, along with the likes of FC Städeli and Standard Lily, to perform well in interregional competition, improve the coëfficients, and attract better footballers each season. It's all very well having enough money to buy Raynor City United lock stock and arrow (even if RCU wouldn't believe that), but if the players won't come, the league will never take off. Aslak is a good start. Climo Coss would be even better.

Elder Heldir To Shake Things Up

If Climo Coss is insanely old and fantastically successful, Heldir Zaman is not far behind. At least, in age. Perhaps not as successful - he hasn't won a World Cup, twice, and an under-21 World Cup, and an under-15 World Cup, and many other things in Wight and Farfadillis down the years, but he's definitely got a few club titles and vast experience to bring to his new managerial role at Shakerssen. The eccentric Shakers ownership, the removals company dating back to when Audioslavia were happily at peace in Ao, are looking for eccentric signings to attract attention in their own peculiar way, and couldn't resist a 78-year old. I mean who can? I hear the United States of Usorno have two presidential candidates over 80, and that's bound to end well.

Excited to be part of the B&Q (boney and quaint) workforce development movement, the Shakers have hired Heldir to succeed Hänggi Rüfenacht, a childlike 44, who stood down at the end of his contract having seen something of a decline in his team's performance in his last season. With experience in the international market second to almost no-one, Heldir will be tasked with unearthing some old or young gems from around the leagues to make this team exciting again. Not that losing 4-11 and 6-7 in SteuerLig matches last season wasn't exciting. But they were defeats, so...

Heldir seems to be working his magic already, having signed both a Ko-orenite in Sid Plundell, 33, and Farv striker Porofirio Benitez, 35, on free transfers... the kind of deals for the walking dead this league takes pride in specialising in (no disrespect to Sid and Porofirio). (Well maybe a little, on second reading). (But definitely none intended. Content creation, see?). If Heldir can get in a veteran Audioslav or two next window, the owners will be very happy indeed. There is money available, of course - because Taxhavn - but that has never been the holdup. Partly it's the quality of the league thats been the discouragement, and partly it's the quality of the league. And also the quality of the league.

Merzberg Gets A Familiar New Team

Hauser & Kofel works team, from the western suburbs of Merzberg, have been exploring unique strategies to improve their fortunes after a few seasons of struggling to avoid relegation from the top flight. It has been such a close call on occasion that one year they were actually relegated and then reprieved due to the league expansion. Enough is enough, thought the bosses at The Mariners, we need to come up with a radical solution.

HKB Merzberg, said someone in the marketing office. When asked to explain, they explained that perhaps they could change their luck, but also critically change their supporters attitude, if they identified more with their home town than the holding company that owned them. This clever marketing chap, who for the record is Ms. Céline Wehrli, a recent graduate of University St. Bernadine (USB) School of Business. She might be on to something, agreed the higher powers.

Although sharing the town, and the stadium, with local rivals VF Merzberg of the second tier, Hauser & Kofel have struggled to get their market share of supporters (says Céline) because most in the town, especially those who don't work for Hauser & Kofel, don't identify with The Mariners. The ship-building company doesn't even have it's yard in Merzberg, but up in the north of the island in Amsterlo, where most ship builders will support one of the big Oranji teams like Orchideeën. Only the H&K head office is based in Merzberg, and administrators don't watch much football according to Céline's demographic analysis.

From next season, in order to draw in more of the locals who aren't fussed about VF Merzberg (who, if anything, are even more hopeless), the former Hauser & Kofel works team will gather under the banner HKB Merzberg, and hope they will turn their fortunes around, so that rather than being seen as relegation candidates, they might even be looking upwards. And on that note...

FA-Tax Goes All Tequiloan

FA-Tax, who rebranded last year to FA-Tax and were formerly known as the Taxhavn FA, have got all excited about their rebranding department and needed to create more work for them, so have announced a rebranding of the SteuerLig, effective season '94 - two seasons away - when the league itself has completed it's expansion plans with the addition of a third division and the inclusion of some over-the-water clubs from nearby islands and atolls. (Still no news on who, although rumours are rife that two grand old amateur teams from the Delte valley, Oswarks Town and United, are being wined and dined respectively in efforts to persuade them to bring some World Champion DNA to the league.)

Technically, the league is not being rebranded but additional divisions being added to the top of the pyramid. This might be seen as great news for Hauser & Kofel - or should I say HKB Merzberg - who have suddenly changed from relegation favourites to promotion certainties, because even if they do go down, they will still be going up. Confused? Put another way, the clubs are all staying within the expanded three-tier structure, but the SteuerLig itself is being relegated down three tiers, and the new league will be called...

Liga-TX. Oooh. I wonder how much it cost to come up with that idea? Not that anyone cares, it's nice to move a bit of cash around, keep it clean and all that. Liga-TX takes it's inspiration from the old Liga-TQ in Tequilo, which had a brief moment in the sun when clubs such as Pitxi-Pitxi 77, Resplendiente, and Fabrica Tapalupé all aspired to intercontinental football before it all came crumbling down, the nation destabilised by the Anaia affair and the league bankrupted when Grupo Taxhavn pulled out. It's still going, but nobody really notices any more.

Back here on the isle, in a Polarian-like restructure of the football pyramid (indeed, at FA-Tax they are calling it the Polarian Pyramid Scheme), Liga-TX will form the top three divisions of 20 teams, including some international teams, while the SteuerLig will form tiers 4 & 5, exclusively a mix of lower tier teams from all over the island. Below that, tiers 6-16 will organise regionally, with the OranjiLig in the north, the Southern League in, err, the south, and the BezirkerLiga in the west.

No need to worry about learning all the new team identities though... unlike the extraordinarily dedicated Polarian sports correspondents, we here in 'TX' are happy to handwave tiers 4 and below and only worry when one of them gets promoted.

Meanwhile

Those lazy handwaving sports correspondents of Taxhavn will have some work to do this coming season though with the first phase of the league expansion creating four more spaces for new teams in SteuerLig-2. We welcome to the league AZ Exloërveen and Zotteeik from the OranjiLig, Sturm Havn from the Southern League, and Rot-Westenweiler from the BezirkerLiga.

The opening up of the league on a merit basis has been welcomed by most, although regional league chiefs are frustrated at losing more quality sides, particularly in the northern Oranjilig. How they feel in the Deltic Waters off Taxhavn, where they are set to lose clubs from their own domestic leagues, is anyone's guess. There have already been complaints in Oswark-upon-Delte, where the Parish Advertiser has received a deluge of letters. In the highly stoic valley, this amounts to no less than a riot of emotion and a threat to civic harmony. The All-Week Super Ultra Premier Deltic Football Association are taking steps to make sure matters don't get further out of hand, for example some disorderly singing or - dogs forbid - a protest banner. Can you imagine? Instead the Deltic FA is likely to ban Oswarks Town and United from breaking away from the league. There could even be an argument, at this rate.

Not Up For The Cups

Last season Raven Thöni played an additional 22 games in interregional football and didn't even get very far. No wonder they ran out of steam and missed interregional football altogether for next season, finishing a disappointing fifth and losing out in the FFI Confederations Trophy play-offs (yet more games). Imagine if they had won the quadruple of league and cup, IFCF Champions League and FFI League of Victors? That would be as many as 32 extra games - more than double the regular season.

This year for FC Städeli, as domestic double winners, it could be 39 extra games if they go all the way in every competition with the extra Cup Winners Cup entry, plus four more domestic games anyway in an expanded league. I mean, it's unlikely. Highly unlikely. Quebecois head coach BKL is not that good. That notwithstanding, we must do something about this, said FA-Tax. With four extra places added this season to the league membership, it means four extra places and a preliminary round in the domestic league members cup. Unless...

FA-Tax have announced that the top four IFCF qualifiers - that's all of them, under current ranking allowance - will not compete in the TaxPokal. This will reduce the number of games the interregional qualifiers will have to play, and will further decrease the likelyhood of a league and cup double, helping other teams to have a chance at the Cup Winners Cup each season. It means cup holders FC Städeli along with Tijhuis Archimedes, Standard Lily and Orchideeën will not compete in this year's TaxPokal. It could also mean a top team, who finishes in the top four year on year, may never play in the TaxPokal. But with the island's ambivalence toward knockout competitions - 150 years of football, and never a national cup until now - it will hardly bother anyone.

While they were at it, the FA have also tinkered with FFI Confederations Trophy nominations too, determining that from this season, the play-offs will be contested by the best four teams who did not qualify for any IFCF competition. This means places 5-8 in the current set-up, and if one of those wins the cup to qualify for the Cup Winners Cup, then their place will be taken by the 9th place team. The aim again is to reduce the number of games a team is obligated toward, as well as helping to diversify the annual interregional intake from the island. HKB Merzberg in the Indies? Can you imagine?!

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Solitary Soccer League

About The SteuerLigen

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Interregional Club Football

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Club Directory: Some Geography

Club Directory: Part One

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