GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK GNN: BREAKING NEWS !! ( GOLTZBORG ONLY )

by **GOLTZBORG** » Thu Mar 09, 2023 9:07 am

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

PORNOGRAPHY POETRY
____PORN POEMS____

Comrade Chairman Smirnoff has ordered His Minister of the Ministry Of Education ( M.O.E. )
to immediately remove ALL books that promote and feature so-called "Pornography Poetry",
from ALL schools ( k-12 ), ALL University and College Libraries, and ALL Public Librariums and
Encyclopediums !

ENCYCLOPEDIUM

LIBRARIUM

This action is the result of numerous protests from parents throughout the education system of
Goltzborg.

This so-called "New Age" of literature ( i.e. "Porn Poems" ), has its roots deeply embedded
within the western and eastern Universities and Colleges within the Imperial Commonwealth.

The first two books of so-called "Porn Poems" were written by two tenured college professors
of literature, Richard Long and Mike Hunt, both from the Commonwealth College of Nantucket,
in the semi-autonomous province of West Oberlin; and the titles of their two books were:

"Once There Was A Man from Nantucket"
( "Who Caught A Duck And Tried To @#$% It !" )

"If You See Kay"
( "Tell Her It's Okay" ).

These two professors' books were an immediate successes and best sellers within the academia of the
entire Eurasian Federation; however, both professors were last seen attempting
to sneak over the border of Goltzborg, and escape into neighboring Maxtopia.

by **GOLTZBORG** » Thu Mar 09, 2023 9:44 am

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

GRAFFITI ... THE NEW GENRE

Comrade Chairman Smirnoff has given His approval to accept a new genre ( style )
of artist expression into the public venues within the Grand Imperial Commonwealth of
Goltzborg.

Graffiti, once banned nationally as an act of defacing and destroying public and private property,
is now officially approved and sanctioned as an accepted form of art.

NOTE:
Artistic Expression of Graffiti requires ALL "Artists" to get a permit, and prior permission from the Government
regarding public properties, and from Citizens regarding private properties, before expressing their views and
and feelings onto any and all buildings and/or structures.

The cost of a permit varies, and is subject to the nature of the graffiti.

Failure to comply with this law will result in a fine and/or imprisonment.

"EXPRESS YOURSELF !!"

by **GOLTZBORG** » Sat Mar 11, 2023 9:47 am

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

THE EDISON MEDICINE SCANDAL !!

This just in to our News Desk here at GNN !!

Abbot Edison, Founder, C.E.O., Chairman of the Board, and President of the Edison Medicine Corporation,
pleaded guilty today in Superior Court ..... of embezzling four ( 4 ) Billion DigitDollars ( dD ) from his own
company's retirement funds !!

REFERENCE INFORMATION:

The Edison Medicine Corporation is one of the largest and oldest medical research companies in the world;
and is known for its patents on numerous medicines; such as: anti-bad-breath pills, anti-gas pills, anti-mucus pills,
and many many more .... too many to mention

EDISON MEDICINE LAB

EDISON MEDICINE DNA RESEARCH

EDISON MEDICINE RESEARCH CENTER

Upon receiving the plea of guilty, the Superior Court Judge, the Honorable Maximus Kruschkoff,
handed down sentencing immediately:

"DEATH BY ELECTROCUTION ..... WITHIN 24 HOURS !!"

by **GOLTZBORG** » Sun Mar 12, 2023 11:43 am

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

????? FIVE NEW COMMANDMENTS !!!!!

The
Supreme Minister
of the
Goltz Eastern Imperial Orthodox Church
announced late last night ..... that He has included Five ( 5 )
New Commandments into the Churches
Sacred Scrolls and Divine Doctrines.

Commandment #11
Thou Shall Not Live in a Sloth Manner

Commandment #12
Thou Shall Not Fear Laboring
( Thou Shall Not be Lazy )

Commandment #13
Thou Shall Dwell in a Sober Mind and Body

Commanment #14
Thou Shall Not be Consumed with Greed

Commandment #15
Thou Shall Worship One's Mind and Body
as Temples

NOTE:
The Supreme Minister of the Church claimed that He was chosen by GOD,
and commanded to reveal the Five New Commandments, while He was in
deep introspective meditation.

by **GOLTZBORG** » Mon Mar 13, 2023 12:03 pm

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

A RECAP OF NEWS FLASH FROM THE PAST

The following articles are OLD NEWS, and are offered today
in order for viewers to refresh their memories regarding news and info.

by **GOLTZBORG** » Fri Mar 17, 2023 11:11 am

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

NO MORE WAR !!!

G.N.N. EXCLUSIVE NEWS RELEASE .....
"NO MORE WAR !!!"

Please access the G.N.N. web-page below,
in order to read all of the details !!

by **GOLTZBORG** » Sun Mar 19, 2023 9:56 am

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

GOLTZBORG TO PURCHASE
GREENLAND ?!!?

Inside anonymous sources have revealed to G.N.N. that the Imperial Government of
the Grand Imperial Commonwealth of Goltzborg has been in negotiations with the
Royal Family and Government of Denmark, regarding the acquisition of Greenland by
Goltzborg, from the Danish Realm.

NOTE: #1
Greenland is Denmark's last substantial overseas protectorate / colony; and if the acquisition
is ratified by both governments, this event would rank right up there with the "Louisiana Purchase"
between France and the United States of America; as well as, the purchase of Alaska from Russia
by the United States of America.

NOTE: #2
It is estimated that the purchase price in somewhere in the financial neighborhood of
one ( 1 ) Trillion DigitDollars ( dD ); which would take Denmark out of receivership
within its current world debt; and could reset its credit rating with the World bank,
and with the World Trade Organization ( W.T.O. ).

NOTE: #3
If-and-when this transaction takes place, it is speculated that Greenland *might* serve
several extremely important purposes for Goltzborg; such as :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::>

(1) Military Bases: Land, Sky, and Sea.

(2) Mineral Exploration, Extraction, and Exportation.

(3) Penal Colony ( Imperial Maximum Security Prisons / IMAX ).

(4) Advanced Research Centers: Military and Commercial.

(5) Homesteads for Citizens and Subjects of
Goltzborg;
and Citizens and Subjects of the member-states of the
Eurasian Federation.

(6) Other not specified planning.

by **GOLTZBORG** » Tue Mar 21, 2023 8:19 am

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

dD "AVENUE$ of REVENUE" dD

Comrade Chairman Smirnoff has ordered His Minister of the Ministry Of Transportation Affairs ( M.O.T.A. ),
Sir Tom Foolery III, to establish Three ( 3 ) New "Avenues of Revenue", which will supplement the
Imperial Treasury to the tune of a conservative estimate of well over One ( 1 ) Trillion DigitDollars ( dD )
annually ..... in gross revenues.

The Three New Avenues of Revenue are as follows :::::::::::>

( #1 )
ALL Major Highways and Roads will become Toll Expressways.

( #2 )
ALL commercial and governmental areas within ALL metropolitan Areas
will have Parking Meters or Parking Garages to receive revenues from drivers.

( #3 )
ALL Major Highways and Roads will be made available to commercial enterprises
for advertisements that promote their Logos and/or any other short promotion,
directly upon the surfaces of the highways and roads; similar in the manner to
which railroad crossing warnings are painted directly upon the surfaces of all
highways and roads ..... in order to warn a driver.

by **GOLTZBORG** » Wed Mar 22, 2023 9:56 am

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

The The Commonwealth Stock eXchange-COMSTOX was up sharply today, upon receiving
news that the Purchase of Greenland was beginning to look like it will be approved.

The Central Stock eXchange-CenStoX was also up in trading today;
reaching near-record-highs.

Multi-Millionaires were Made and Lost Today at both Stock Exchanges !!
________________________________________________________
____________________________________________
_____________________________
________________
__________
_______
____
__
_

★

by **GOLTZBORG** » Thu Mar 23, 2023 12:06 pm

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

IT IS BUDGET TIME IN THE MINISTERIUM
{ MINISTRIES~OF~GOVERNMENT M.O.G. }

The Imperial Government of Goltzborg has submitted its Annual Budget
to the Executive Office at White Castle Estate ..... for the mandated
review by Comrade Chairman Smirnoff.

NOTE:
Please access the G.N.N. Web-Page above for
the breakdown of revenue for each sector.

by **GOLTZBORG** » Fri Mar 24, 2023 11:29 am

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

THE ★ "LADY OF LIBERTY" ★ DEDICATION

Millions of Citizens and Subjects of Goltzborg celebrated the Official
Dedication of the "Lady of Liberty" Statue today at Soldiers Field; in
Goltzburg, the Capital City of the Grand ★ Imperial ★ Commonwealth !!

The Giant Concrete Statue stands 300 feet tall, and represents all of the Liberties
that Citizens and Subjects are guaranteed under the current Constitution, and the
Imperial Imperatives ( i.e. Laws of the Land / Common Laws ).

by **GOLTZBORG** » Fri Mar 24, 2023 1:01 pm

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

BOYS TOYS

Comrade Chairman Smirnoff agreed to an interview by
G.N.N. reporter Wolfgang Blitzkreig yesterday; whereby,
He was asked about all of His so-called "Boys Toys".

His Private Express Train
"ZoomZoom"

His Private Jet
"SkyCom One"

His Private Luxurious
Chauffeur Limousine
"Limo One"

His Private Yacht
"SeaShark One"

by **GOLTZBORG** » Sat Mar 25, 2023 9:17 am

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

"THINK BEFORE YOU DRINK !!"

"Think Before You Drink !!!"
is the newest motto to be circulated by the Ministry Of Transportation Affairs ( M.O.T.A. );
which specifically targets Citizens who are traveling on the highways and byways of
GOLTZBORG,
while under the influence of alcohol.

Several of the surveys of auto accidents involving Citizens who have been drinking
alcoholic beverages has been rising at an alarming rate, when compare to other
previous records and reports of accidents involving DWI ( Driving While Intoxicated ).

NOTE:
The current fine for DWI without any injuries is a minimum of 100.00 dD ( DigitDollars ),
and a maximum of 1,000.00 dD, for first time offenders; with the suspension of the
guilty party's driving license for a period of no less than one ( 1 ) year.

by **GOLTZBORG** » Tue Mar 28, 2023 10:03 am

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

G.N.N. is the first to report this Breaking News !!

The Senior Senators of the Upper House of the Estates~Senates,
and the Senior Statesmen of the Lower House of the RStates~Senates,
both ratified a new form of taxation today, on ALL retails sales of
goods and services !!

TAX AT ORIGINAL RATE
( T.A.O.R. )

This Imperial Imperative ( i.e. Law of the Land / Common Law )
requires ALL retail businesses to tax each and every single product
or service at the originally established retail price when the product
or service was first initially made available for purchase by the consumers.

In other words ::::::::::::: ( BACK GROUND INFO ) :::::::::::::::::::::>

Before any product and service is made available for purchase by consumers
in Goltzborg, the retailer and the government have to first determine a fair
retail price for each and every product and/or service; of which, each product or service is
to be taxed at a 10% fixed rate; of which, that same amount never ever declines ..... even
if-and-when the price of any product or service declines or decreases due to being on sale
for a temporary period of time, or being reduced permanently.

EXAMPLE:

A coffee pot is determined to have a retail price of 20.00 dD by a retailer and the Imperial
Government ..... when purchased at the regular price the coffee pot is taxed at a flat rate of
10% ( i.e. 2.00 dD ) ..... then the same type of coffee pot is marked down to 10.00 dD for
permanent close out ..... that coffee pot will still be taxed at the original tax of 2.00 dD.

NOTE:

This mandate may appear to be a bit over-the-top, especially since there could come a time
when the tax on a product *might* be as much as, or even more than, the prevailing sale price

However, this new policy is expected to help make all retailers better at purchasing their
goods and services; which would eventually help the bottom-line on their P & L Reports.

by **GOLTZBORG** » Tue Mar 28, 2023 10:55 am

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

The City Commissioners of the Goltzburg Capital Zone CZ,
the Capital City of Goltzborg, announced that they were in the
process of annexing an additional 100 square miles, for
future expansion purposes; such as: a new International SkyPort,
three new Public Parks, expansion of the River Port and Sea Port areas, etc.

( Middle Left Side of the Info-Photo )

NOTE:

Comrade Chairman Smirnoff has signed off on this newest annexation,
and has even gone as far as ordering the City Commissioners to expedite
the annexation process at their earliest most possible convenience !!

by **GOLTZBORG** » Tue Mar 28, 2023 11:42 am

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

FOR ALL OF THE LATEST NEWS FROM WHITE CASTLE ESTATE,
PLEASE ACCESS THE G.N.N. DATA BASE FEATURED BELOW !!

NOTE:

The following information is the most recent news released from
the Executive Offices of Comrade Chairman Smirnoff, at His
White Castle Estate, the Official Residence of the Imperial Family,
located in the Goltzburg Capital Zone CZ, the Capital City of
GOLTZBORG.

by **GOLTZBORG** » Wed Mar 29, 2023 8:49 am

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

Death and Destruction took place today in several metro areas in both,
the Eastern Republics and the Western Republics, of the
Grand Imperial Commonwealth of
Goltzborg !!

The Cities of Warzaw, Marx, and Goltzburg Capital Zone CZ,
the Capital City of Goltzborg, were targeted in the Region of the
Eastern Republics.

EASTERN REPUBLICS

_______________________________________________

The Cities of Vess, Zech, Veem, and Odessa-on-the-Sea
were targeted in the Region of the Western Republics.

WESTERN REPUBLICS

______________________________________________

NOTE:

As of this reporting, no group has taken responsibility for these attacks;
of which, it is believed that all of these attacks were orchestrated by a
single terrorist cell ..... domestic and/or international !!

by **GOLTZBORG** » Wed Mar 29, 2023 3:12 pm

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

WORLD ASSEMBLY
★

GENERAL ASSEMBLY
★

SECURITY COUNCIL
★

★

Comrade Chairman Smirnoff called an Emergency Meeting today
of His Top Foreign Affairs Advisors, and His Top Military Advisors,
to White Castle Estate, the Official Residency of the Imperial Family.

The topic for discussion was whether or not Goltzborg should vacate
it seats at the World Assembly; both, the Security Council, and the
General Assembly !!

Leaders of a majority of member-states to the Eurasian Federation
were also present at the Emergency Meeting ... via Video Conference.

There was no indication as to what prompted such an Emergency Meeting;
however, it is speculated that it might have something to do with the
manner in which the institutions seem to be protecting a minority of the
member nations, rather than the majority of member nations.

NOTE:
The Press was not allowed to ask questions after the Emergency Meeting;
however, they were told that a public announcement would be forthcoming.

____________________________________________________________

O.O.C. NOTE:
This News Flash is entirely meant for entertainment purposes only;
and may, or may not, reflect any nation here at NationStates.

★

by **GOLTZBORG** » Thu Mar 30, 2023 8:03 am

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

THE
"SOCIALIST MANIFESTO"
by Mark Karl

Comrade Chairman Smirnoff mandated that His Ministry Of Education ( M.O.E. ),
require ALL Students within the borders of Goltzborg read and recite certain
passages within the "Socialist Manifesto" ..... written by Mark Karl in 1888.

Before graduating from High School, and being allowed to enter College or University,
ALL Students must read and interpret this manuscript; as well as, be able to recite in
public ... certain phrases within the doctrine.

Comrade Chairman Smirnoff stated in a Public Press Release from His Executive Office
at White Castle Estate, the Official Residence of the Imperial Family, the following :::::::>

"It is extremely necessary, and vitally important, for ALL Students to be made aware
of the facts on what and how their GREAT Nation was founded upon; therefore, I have
made it my personal goal to educate our future Citizens and Leaders on their Great
Nation's history !!"

by **GOLTZBORG** » Thu Mar 30, 2023 10:05 am

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

THE GOLTZBORG GATEWAY TO THE EAST

Comrade Chairman Smirnoff and the entire Imperial Family, were present yesterday afternoon,
when He Officially Dedicated the "Goltzborg Gateway to the East" National Historical Monument !!

Located on the River Front in the Goltzburg Capital Zone CZ , the Capital City of Goltzborg,
the GIANT Arch stands an impressive 333 feet tall, spans 277 in width, and was constructed
of "Super Steel" forged and fabricated in-country from national natural resources, by the
Proud Citizens of the Nation !!

Comrade Chairman Smirnoff received a ten minute round of applause after He spoke to the
estimated 100,000 Citizens who were on hand to Celebrate the Ceremony ::::::::::::::::::::>

"It is with GREAT Pride and Honor that I hereby Dedicate the *Goltzborg Gateway to the East*;
and may it show the way for our nation's future growth, as a symbol of Strength and Solidarity,
for the Protection and Preservation of Peace and Prosperity for ALL of Mankind !!"

"THANK YOU !!"

by **GOLTZBORG** » Thu Mar 30, 2023 12:27 pm

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

This just in to the News Desk at G.N.N. !!!!

Senior Senator Ivan Putanskii of the Upper House of the Estates~Senates,
representing the Semi-Autonomous region of Lavatina, was assassinated
just minutes ago while he was addressing a group of Press Correspondents
outside of the Estates~Senates campus complex !!

The lone gunman, seen here in this video, shot Senior Senator Putanskii
five ( 5 ) times at point blank range, before turning the gun on himself, in a
"murder-suicide" assassination !!

Before the assassin killed himself he screamed out the following words:
"Delete the Elite Evil People !!";
of which, it is now believed that the assassin was a member of a domestic
terrorist organization known only as the
D.E.E.P. !!

Please stay tuned into G.N.N. as we investigate this ongoing major event !!

by **GOLTZBORG** » Tue Apr 11, 2023 7:18 am

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

The Imperial
Bank Of Social Security
{ B.O.S.S. }

With the quick stroke of a pen, Comrade Chairman Smirnoff established the
"Imperial Bank Of Social Security", commonly referred to as merely "the B.O.S.S."

The B.O.S.S. will ensure and guarantee every working Citizen and Subject of
Goltzborg a nice nest-egg upon their retirement from the working world.

NOTE #1
The B.O.S.S. is a Division of
The Commonwealth Stock eXchange-COMSTOX.

"$AVE TODAY AND RETIRE TOMORROW ::::::::> $.T.A.R.T."

NOTE #2
Ten ( 10 ) per-cent of a worker's salary will be set aside by the B.O.S.S.,
and assigned to an individual retirement account; where said funds will
accrue interest at the prevailing average rate of interest over the life of
each worker's account.

by **GOLTZBORG** » Wed May 24, 2023 7:46 am

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GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

W
TAX
R

Comrade Chairman Smirnoff has mandated that a new "WAR TAX"
be applied to ALL retail sales of goods and/or services .....
EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY !!

The current War Tax is 10%, and the new War Tax is to be an
additiobnal 1%; thereby, making the collective War Tax at 11%.

No reason was given to the press when asked; however, it is
widely assumed by most government insiders ... that the new
War Tax will be used in several new areas of conflict that the
Imperial Government is engaged .

by **GOLTZBORG** » Thu Jun 01, 2023 11:30 am

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

For ALL of the latest details in the "War of Words" between Comrade Chairman Smirnoff
and the Supreme Minister of the Goltz Eastern Imperial Orthodox Church, please access
the GNN World Wide Web ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::>

by **GOLTZBORG** » Tue Jul 04, 2023 10:57 am

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK

G.N.N.

!! BREAKING NEWS NOW !!

PROJECT ARTI - 2

A spokesperson for the Ministry Of Science-Technology ( M.O.S.T. )
announced earlier today that Comrade Chairman Smirnoff has approved
the request for twenty-five ( 25 ) Billion digitDollars ( dD ) for research
into Advanced Artificial Intellignece ( A.I. ), which would allow A.I. to
learn at an accelerated speed, with the intention of discovering the
absolute mathematical formula for time travel.

Mankind's intelligence is too slow with regards and respect to trying
to discover pathways to the future and to the past; therefore, since it
is already well known in the scientific community of the world that A.I.
can learn much faster than Man can ..... it was decided to allow A.I.
a chance at unlocking the past and the future.

Albert Einstein proved in his equations that it is theoretically accepted
that time travel is possible ..... given the technology to make it happen;
therefore, with A.I. being allowed to learn at its own pace, it is believed
that time travel is only a few decades away from becoming reality !

GLOBAL NEWS NETWORK GNN: BREAKING NEWS !! ( GOLTZBORG ONLY )

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