The Eagle's Cup XV :: Cup of Champions 16 :: RP/Scores

by **Turori** » Sat Jan 21, 2023 8:36 am

Entity Acronyms in Turorian Culture

FAT

Football Association of Turori

CEEP
Cocoabo Enrichment and Enhancement Project

ECTO
Eagles Club: Turori Offices

TWII
Turorian Weather & Information Interchange

NABRO
North Almintora Baking & Racing Organization

Colloquial Acronyms in Turorian Culture:

TIVO (Tee-Voh)
"This is Very Odd"

LOTI (Low-Tie)
"Life on the Island"

IWIWE (Eye-We-We)
"I wish I was Elswhere"

BUTTE (Butt)
"Better Under The Turorian Emirate"

IYSAPINOSUB (Eye-Sap-In-Yo'-Sub)
"If you're so awsome prove it now or shut up, bitch"

 Turori 4 - 3 Nephara	
	Turori Goals:	:: 42' Nua'oma Aikiki:: 81' Turakia Diijelhma:: 86' Loala Inkabu:: 91' Kala'a Yuliizala           
	Stats :: Turori 	:: Possession: 46%:: Shots: 12:: Corners: 12 :: Nephara :: Possession: 54%:: Shots: 7:: Corners: 14
	Turori Lineup :: 	Derizi Amatopa, Planio’o Nrujsa (Turakia Diijelhma 77'), Bvalis Amaanara (Lumlao Noauryua 80'), Karek Edgeli (Tulaki Rauogba 64'), Kinabo Telioa, Cuoabaza Orani’aoa, Lati'ala Giaoka, Kiidallen Aeroluzzi, Daliora Toru'u, Nua'oma Aikiki (Loala Inkabu 77'), Kala'a Yuliizala

 Turori 0 - 0 Banija	
	Turori Goals:	               
	Stats :: Turori 	:: Possession: 49%:: Shots: 3:: Corners: 0 :: Banija :: Possession: 51%:: Shots: 4:: Corners: 4
	Turori Lineup :: 	Derizi Amatopa, Planio’o Nrujsa (Retiso Buran 28'), Bvalis Amaanara, Amakli Inuro'o (Naraiza Ruaplal 45'), Tulaki Rauogba, Cuoabaza Orani’aoa, Lati'ala Giaoka, Kiidallen Aeroluzzi, Daliora Toru'u (Kala'a Yuliizala 73'), Nua'oma Aikiki, Turakia Diijelhma

by **Banija** » Sat Jan 21, 2023 10:07 am

Eagle's Cup XV- 3-1 home win is 'fantastic' start for Banijans against Baker Park

DODOMA, BUNYORO- It's always spectacular when the national team takes on Baker Park, probably our most frequently played opponent of all-time(unfortunately, the RBSA's statistician's do a poor job of keeping track of this). Especially with Pam Scott, our manager, being from Baker Park. She received a loud round of applause from the visiting Baker Parkers, as well as a boom of support from the home fans- the team is having a rousing run of success in recent tournaments, consistently going deep into various tournaments. She's a popular woman, and obviously she's a former manager of Baker Park's national team.

But on this day, it would be the Kadongo Kamu who would ensure that the home fans go home happy. This is the last major opportunity that many of these players will have to impress the manager before she names her squad for Qualifying, with World Cup 93 Qualifying just around the corner. "Competition is as fierce as it has ever been for places in the team." She told reporters. "We've got young players showcasing themselves, and I expect a number of them to hit the window next time for opportunities to continue to impress at the club level." But despite quite a few young players, there are veterans on this squad as well who have never gotten the callup before for Qualifying- with a few 29 year olds starting on this squad, calling it a 'youth squad' is an outright lie.

But she's always been one to ensure that people earn their opportunities. And the first half played by this team, on this day, was fantastic. They largely were able to control the flow of the game, as their ability to control possession allowed Banija to create a spate of chances for ourselves. We had Zion Izuchukwu, on the left wing, who was able to create the first opportunity. Zion had taken on two defenders, and beaten them both on the dribble, leaving Baker Park stretched and very out of place. He came in on goal, the keeper had to come out, but Zion, calmly, passed the ball to the center of the pitch, where Eli Aero was able to tap it into an empty net. 1-0 after 26 minutes.

Zion was also heavily involved in the second goal. From a dead ball foul, He bent a free kick towards the back post, that Aero was able to head back across the face of goal. Oboyo Okombo was there for the second header, as he slammed it home from just a few yards out- once again, the keeper pulled out of position. The 42nd minute hit made it 2-0, and put the Banijans in control. Baker Park did come back with a fury, however. A 63rd minute goal made things tense, as their offense searched and searched for that equalizing goal. But the Banijans held strong, and Odongo Kagenda put the game away on the counter in the 87th minute. The 3-1 victory meant three points for Banija at home, a great way to start the tournament.

Their second game involved a trip to the Vilitan Cove, to play against Turori. "They're elite- there's simply no way around that." Pam Scott told reporters. "It's a tough opponent, and a tougher place to play." And the result in that away trip was positive. A rather drab 0-0 draw- neither team had much chance creation, as the game was largely played in the midfield. But Pam Scott was not mad. "Look, an away point is hard to come by in international football, especially against an opponent as talented and as skilled as Turori. There's a lot of things we need to look at. But we largely held up well- nothing was too big for us here. We take what we can learn, enjoy the point, and then we'll prep for Nephara's visit on Matchday 3."

Terminology to Know: A Beginner's guide to terminology to succeed at your internship with the RBSA

So do YOU want to succeed at an internship with the RBSA? Fear not! You can do this! Just understand that there's a ton of weird terms, and abbreviations, that we use in common parlance at the highest levels of Banijan soccer, to discuss the sport and things beyond it. Are you ready?

RBSA: Royal Banijan Soccer Association. The ultimately governing body for all levels of professional and adult amateur soccer in Banija.
OCB: Olympic Committee of Banija. Ultimate governing body for all professional sports in Banija besides soccer & ice hockey.
BHF: Banijan Hockey Federation. Ultimate governing body for ice hockey in Banija.
S-FPL: Shango-Fogoa Premier League. The joint top flight for soccer between Banija, the Busoga Islands, and Farfadillis. Farfadillis has 10 slots, and Banija/Busoga(which have a joint pyramid) have 10 slots.
BISA: Busoga Islands Soccer Association. The governing body for soccer in the Busoga Islands. Their six professional clubs are part of the Banijan soccer pyramid, and they are a joint partner in the S-FPL.
BBPFU: Banijan & Busogan Professional Footballer's Union. The labor union for professional soccer plyers in Banija & the Busoga Islands.
BCSG: Banijan Collegiate Sports Group. The ultimate governing body for all inter-collegiate sports, including soccer, in Banija.
BSL: Banijan Soccer League. The national second tier of Banijan & Busogan soccer, held exclusively in those two countries. The champion is promoted to the S-FPL every year, and relegation occurs from this league to the regional leagues.
BCGC: Banijan Commonwealth Games Council. The governing body for Banija's participation in the Quebecois Commonwealth Games.

by **Nephara** » Sat Jan 21, 2023 10:40 am

Turori 4 - 3 Nephara
(4-4-2) 1 - Longstreet; 2 - Kovac, 5 - Telford, 22 - Muscat, 3 - Delasra (26 - Mueller 72'); 13 - Ravenwood (7 - Blackwold 54'), 4 - Vol Brininger, 21 - Sebold (23 - Desmond 86'), 11 - Hauser; 9 - Balmoral (17 - Valenza 72'), 10 - Slazenger
Goals: Slazenger 11', Hauser 56', Sebold 67'

Nephara 1 - 0 C. Baker Park
(4-2-3-1) 1 - Longstreet; 2 - Kovac, 5 - Telford, 6 - Roback, 3 - Delasra; 7 - Blackwold, 15 - Constantine, 21 - Sebold (25 - Cowler 86'), 11 - Hauser (16 - Coffey 71'); 9 - Balmoral (17 - Valenza 71'), 10 - Slazenger
Goal: Balmoral 27'

Many things are important to the Nepharan people. Social democracy, the art of the longbow, the colour green, the sea, casual binge drinking. But nothing, perhaps, is nearer to the marcher heart than the art of shortening what things are called.

When it comes to people, the most common form, the 'standard' form, is to cut something in half and stick an 'i' on the end. Take Nephara's most common name, Catheline; standard short forms are 'Cathi' and 'Kitti'. Gareth, the most common masculine name, becomes 'Gari' or, sometimes, 'Gati'.

But not every name can be cut down so simply. One common nickname is to simply take a letter and double it up with is on the end; see Felixe 'Vivi' Vetiver. It's a versatile treatment, too, applying well to non-traditional marcher names; take the AFC Corvistone winger Aitziber Orzabal, known personally and professionally as Zizi Orzabal. Or another winger, Zaza Kirkland. It takes a deep dive online to discover that her given name is 'Konstanze'. Her reluctance to go by that name reflects an overall Nepharan reluctance for alliterative first and last names.

So, too, masculine or gender-neutral names that end in -a - 'Andrea' and 'Nikola' are common but exclusively feminine names in Nephara, with Andreas and Nikolai the male forms (though they will often be shortened to Andri and Niki, or Niko for men) - as well as the foreign convention of naming sons after fathers, which is seen as tacky and self-absorbed.

Nicknames show casual affection and warmth in a way that is otherwise difficult to express directly without being overwrought, and once established, deviating from a nickname can come across as cold and impersonal. Often - as with Zaza - a nickname can simply transcend the official given name, though most will not bother with the red tape of changing names.

Nicknames for corporations are rare - seen as tacky, too - but not unknown for particularly strong institutions. The Zenith has finally caught on as the renamed Premiership, and the initially derisive nickname of 'the Zed' - in turn working off the derisive 'Z-League' pioneered by the podcast Swinks and Roundabouts, referring both to the 'space age' branding and in self-deprecating reference to Brenecia's A-League - has caught on to the point where official Zenith social media will reference it by that name.

Nephara herself, and it is always 'her' self, is referred to affectionally as 'Nephi', with her people referring to themselves as 'marks'. Don't get confused and refer to Nepharim themselves as 'Nephi'. Actually, the whole system is understood largely at the blood and bone level, so don't refer to anything as anything. Just follow others' lead, stay safe, and if you think someone's being insulting, that's probably their way of being polite. It's when a Nephar's being polite that you really have to worry.

by **Tikariot** » Sat Jan 21, 2023 10:56 am

The fans of the Snowy Owls also deserve particular mentioning. Not only are they renowned for their chants, but they are also bringing the Thunder Clap (Click here for example) to the stadium, something that the players join in as a pre-game ritual that has left an impression on the opponents and opposing fans more than once (OOC: similar to the Haka of the New Zealand All Blacks). The players will form a triangle near the kick-off circle and lift their arms, which the fans do as well. Then a lone drum will start to signal the rhythm and both players and fans alike will move in unison, each clap accompanied by a loud cry, the claps (and cries) speeding up, creating an overwhelming sense of impending doom.

Brian McAllister - 49

After having been assistant to now former coach Stuart Ekstrom, Brian McAllister made the move to Sargossa and enjoyed a lot more success than his former mentor, having two Copa Rushmori victories under his belt, so with the expiration of his contract in Sargossa and Ekstrom's dismissal after the disappointing string of results aligning, the timing was perfect for McAllister to return to his native country in the driver's seat. While generally a proponent of the same flexible 4-3-3 setup that Ekstrom had almost perfected to a point and that has not changed during his Sargossan employment, the Copa Rushmori 41 saw a successful one-off experiment with a 4-4-2 line-up, for the WCQ92 and the Copa Rushmori 42 the Snowy Owls returned to the 4-3-3, but chances are that they might morph into a 4-4-2 every now and then to add even more unpredictability. With Tikariot's victory at the CR42, McAllister became a three-time Copa Rushmori winner.

+4

My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers: Yes-ish (TG me and I can give you the names for scorers, assists and more, but we'll figure this out one way or another)
Godmod scoring events: No
RP injuries to my players: Yes (just please be reasonable)
Godmod injuries to my players: No
Hand out yellow cards to my players: Yes (again please be reasonable)
Hand out red cards to my players: Yes (same deal)
Godmod other events: No

by **Valanora** » Sat Jan 21, 2023 1:20 pm

When traveling through the great expanse of the Eternal Empire, there are certain phrases and acronyms that pop up time and time again. While these might be commonplace for the locals to immediately know their meaning, most foreigners will likely be unaccustomed to these and might find themselves asking themselves what it all means. It is only natural for a land as large as the Empire has become to have this shortcuts to try and speed along conversation, be it in writing or in verbal discourse. Below are a few that could help those souls making their way around them Empire feel a bit more knowledgeable and able to converse quickly with any of the local citizens who might be using them in everyday conversation.

VSC - The Valanora Sporting Council: This is the government agency that oversees all matters of sport within the Empire. Their headquarters is located in Raynor City and they employ hundreds to administrate all of sport within the Empire, often making schedules and appropriating which funds to be allocated where in order to keep all manners of competition going.

VFA - The Vanorian/Valanora Footballing Association: A subdivision of the VSC, this organization oversees explicitly the football aspects of the nation, including hiring and firing the staff that manages the national teams. On the domestic side of things, it is the VFA that decides the prize money for each competition as well as allocates the appropriate funds to the lower division clubs to subsidize their operating costs so that the clubs are less likely to fold. In particular traveling costs are subsidized with the acknowledge of such being high with the size of the Empire, as well as a youth grant for every club that scales depending on where they are in the pyramid for the operation of their youth and reserve teams.

EPL - The Elven Premier League/Premiership: This is the top flight of domestic football in the nation and outside of the national team matches, is the most visible showing of Vanorian football culture. Typically playing at a rather high standard and believed by many to be among the wealthiest and best leagues in the world, sixteen teams play every season to decide the champion, who also will represent the league in international competition, and the unfortunate two teams who will be relegated to the second tier.

AEWDIB - An elf would do it better: A somewhat less used acronym these days since the last Calling, but it is a phrase that originates due to the highly sought after expertise of elven expertise across many different fields. This lead to the belief that elves were somehow just better at doing things than other humanoids, even if it was not actually the case. A prideful people, the elves would embrace this perception and the acronym would be born.

GSW - Glorious Southwest: This term refers to a region within a region, as an old friendly rivalry between different parts of the region of Atlantian Oceania was had, with the region as a whole boasting many different championships across many different sports. Less commonly used these days after a period of ... high tension, it still is sometimes used to refer to the collection of nations in the southwest of the region, notably including: The Eternal Empire, Equestia, Demot, Farfadillis, Banija, Baker Park, and Siovanija and Tuesland among others.

by **Zwangzug** » Sat Jan 21, 2023 4:26 pm

Ah, yes, the great double-entendre acronym, a tradition with a mighty history here. Zwangzugians on a whole are very prudish and would rather deal in dry innuendo than use outright profanity. So there's a lot of "bleep." The radio callsign for the radio station carrying the Zebras' baseball games is, appropriately, WTB--as in, "what the bleep." When the nation of Ambrose-Douglas was struggling during the second World Baseball Classic, a pair of Zwangzugian friends who happened to be named Ambrose and Douglas founded the Douglas-Ambrose Malevolence Network, in part to complain about Zwangzug-designed organization software. Later, it transpired that their surnames were Unterman and Kachermeyer, respectively, so when they took their sedition to the next level, it became the Unterman-Kachermeyer Fan Club.

The connection to sports goes further. When we discovered the existence of "wizards" and "witches" claiming to play sports on brooms, they gave the name of their putative league as the Quidditch Union in Zwangzug--QUIZ. When the baseball clubs tried to set up their short-lived associational league, they did so with the assistance of teams in Liventia, Ad'ihan, and Yafor 2, who together with Zwangzug, formed LAZY. When Milchama fans attributed the existence of a "Zebras curse" to "Squinky the Squid," some of our fans suggested SQUINKY might be an acronym for "Sudden Quitting/Unemployment In Network Karma, Yearly." (Referring to the struggles of the aforementioned WTB to retain announcers.)

When the economy was nationalized by AI, it was done under the auspices of the Committee for Yearly Budgeting, Organization, Remunerations, and Grants (CYBORG).

The old-school use of "Algebraic English", even though it's mostly gone out of favor, has nevertheless left a legacy of "exponential" notation such as the ZS^3 (Zwischen Soccer-Specific Stadium, even though we mostly call it football), or the SC^3 (Starways Congress Congressional Championships, for the university system in our former region). And when we tried to give the Holy Empire advice on a name for their campaign against Cocoa-Bo in the World Cup 85 cycle, our suggestion was the "Crusaders' Coalition Contra Cocoa-bo" or C4. This led us to outsource some of our foototes to the Candelaria And Marquez Organization of Users of Footnotes, Lists, and Alternate General Esoterica (CAMOUFLAGE).

And, of course, how can we forget the birth of our first football league? For context, well before Zwangzug's time, leagues such as Casari and Capitalizt SLANI sent their champions to a top-level superleague known as the International Association Football League. Around World Cup 39, with domestic football experiencing a renaissance, representatives from Casari returned and discussed resurrecting that competition as the World Association Football League. (This would ultimately not transpire, although the IAFL's regularity was cited as one factor in the creation of the TakilQuip Champions' Cup.) Zwangzug, however, had an even more fundamental barrier, in that football was not sufficiently established in the country to permit a full-scale league. Our representatives quipped that we would instead need a championship for Minor United Footballing Nations--"muffin," to compete with "waffle." Aguazul joined us in that endeavor, and while the MUFN only lasted for a few cycles, the exploits of San Pablo, 12 de noviembre, Arlington City, and all the rest are a still-ongoing history.

(Dewey 14, Imamura 36 and 71)
(Waugh 28)

World Cup 81/82/83/84

For a nation that has as long of an official name as the Commonwealth of Baker Park, society here has always maintained a complicated history with usage of abbreviations, acronyms and initials in everyday life.

From the earliest history of the country, reducing the names of places and things to “shorthand talk” was regarded as uncouth & a reflection on ones' education; the designation of municipal governments chartered by Parliament were always referred to by their full title e.g., Corporation of the City of Belle Haven, or even the less wordy 'City Corporation of Belle Haven' was acceptable, but never was it considered good manners to call it CCBH or BHCC.
It was though everybody and everything were being paid on a per word basis, so the more lengthy and complex a organization was named, the better in first decades of the 20th Century.

Even in the military, where nearly everything is reduced to a lexicon of acronyms, there was not (and still not today) anywhere the manifestation of the terminology used crossing into everyday civilian usage; except through portrayal in entertainment, the overwhelming majority of citizens of Baker Park don't understand what it is to be CORC'd (corked) if they've never served in the Naval Service of the Commonwealth (NSC), which is the process of Citing the Order that they have violated and Receiving Correction from a superior.

Even things that have become commonly accepted as everyday use acronyms have confusing explanations as to what the letters stand for; most employed citizens are paid under a system known as CLAWS, the Classified LAbor Wage Scale which sets minimum starting hourly or salaried wages depending upon a person's age, education level or skilled training & years in the workforce. But there is widespread confusion as to whether the above is actually what it stands for, as some claim that it is short for CLAssified Wage Scale, Classified Labor And Wages or Classified Labor And Work Scale.
(Actually, it's the original definition, per the original Act of Parliament that introduced the concept, the “Classified Labor Wage Act (1974) (as amended)” [Public Law 21-4-47].

Belle Haven's mass transit system CARTA (Capital Area Rapid Transit Authority) is another widely used acronym, although prior to the opening of the Red & Blue lines of the subway system, it was known as CRTS (see are tee ess); a major rebranding campaign popularized the new name and drove increased use as an added benefit.

As for sports, there are numerous examples regarding the identification of teams and clubs regarding the adoption of abbreviated references, acronymic designation or association with specific initials.
Let's examine the case of two soccer clubs who have worked amicably through the years to keep their identities intact and separate from one another.
Middlebourne is the second largest municipality in St Leon, the true 'little brother' of the state capital Shirley. Middlebourne Township FC was established in 1899, one of the 28 remaining FAC member clubs that were founded in the 19th Century; by the time they were accepted as the 62nd member of the FAC in 1908, they'd become Town rather than Township and began their still existing role as a thorn in the side of Shirley Metro FC.

Middletown became a major port of entry for immigrants that were recruited to the Commonwealth by the Northern States Company to settle in Osheana, and later was the center of the dispute between the company & state against Ezra, the Western & Southern Company and George W Baker & Sons, as well as the rest of the Commonwealth by proxy, which resulted in the Bond County Settlement and Free Rail Tariff Act that gave Ezra the sliver of land on the north shore of the Stillwater River.
Middletown AFC was a breakaway group formed from Middletown RFC in 1907, becoming full members of the FAC in 1914.

Long story short—Middletown was granted City status in 1934 after the population rose above 70,000, and the club changed to Middletown City FC in 1936. In the 1960's, Middlebourne anticipated it would reach the threshold for receiving a charter after the 1973 census and entered into a negotiation with MCFC to acquire the rights to “AFC” for a subsequent name change to Middlebourne City AFC.
Unfortunately, the City status failed to materialize so the club were stuck with the MCAFC abbreviation, which hasn't proven to be terrible thing, but provided an example of goodwill from both clubs.

Through a series of mergers, the Third Division club ROCK United came into existence in its current form in 1973. Kesslersville AC and Rosewood FC, in neighboring communities to the south & east of Hannover, merged in 1965 followed by Cranbrook SC four years later; Oglesby Community FC completed the consolidation of St Stephen's Borough's “Little Four” three years after making their only appearance in the final of the FAC Trophy, the last completely amateur club to do so.
ROCK join Midtown AC of Ezriquay as clubs known best by their acronym, while a quintet of historic sides are recognizable by just their initials: Victoria & Albert SC (V&A), Western & Southern RR FC (W&S), Great Northern RR FC (GNRR)--all charter members of the FAC—and Pembroke St David's FC (PSD) and the Railway Firemen, Conductors and Porters Athletic Club (RFCP).

There is one dividing line that marks where the change from eschewing short names and acronyms to more widespread usage--the rise of of the phenomenon that became central to counter-culture upheaval, rejection of what became known as the "Victoria Cult"; many of Baker Park's traditional norms were branded as 'VC' by youth, derided as anachronistic and repressive. VC was the gateway to changing everyday communication through saving time and effort via abbreviation and initial use.

_________________________________________________________________________________________
© Sporting Times Weekend 2023
Slow start to Eagles Cup
by Fiona Devlin, National Soccer Writer

The Commonwealth of Baker Park National Team open up their three match homestand for the Eagles Club Group in the Eagles Cup XV tournament against Turori at Rogers Stadium, looking for their first points after falling to Banija and Nephara on the first two matchdays in Dodoma and Brinemouth, respectively.

Manager Hailey Reinhart-Zavaros is searching out various means to get the team off to faster starts in matches, after the Bees conceded inside the half hour mark against both the Kadongo Kamu and the Cormorants; the three consecutive fixtures in Endborough will see more aggressive opening quarter hour tactics employed to gain an early upper hand in possession.

There's more to the overall match results than meets the eye as this particular player group are at the final 'test phase' for the structural defensive changes developed over the 20 match period leading up to the start of the EC.

"I know fans watch and say 'why aren't they making a change at X position, or why aren't they switching up the shape and tempo?' and I understand completely", Reinhart-Zavaros answered at her media availability ahead of the fifth all time meeting against the Eels. "There is a game plan we develop for every opponent, but there's also a plan we're following to get feedback on positional assignments and other things we're experimenting with tactically. If we can get some early momentum, there will be positive results over these three matches."

The teams traded 3-0 victories on the opponents' home turf in the last Eagles Cup, as well a split of neutral site fixtures previously and will meet on the final matchday at the Almintora National Stadium in the Turori capital; whether that match will see BP still having a chance to make the Cocoa-bo Challenge Trophy semi-finals depends largely on how the imminent result plays out.

___________________________________________________________________________________________

Banija 3-1 Baker Park
Eagles Club, Dodoma
Johnston (C); Brooks, O'Connor, Bauer; Park (D'Alessandro-59'), Eichorn, Wiley (McFairlaine-70'), Altman; A Knight; McDavid, Hardison (Craig-70')
Goal: McDavid, 63'

Nephara 1-0 Baker Park
Eagles Club, Brinemouth
McCormack; Frost, Edmonds, Schulman; Taylor (Eichorn-51'), D'Alessandro (Garfield-51'), McFairlaine, Reynolds; Craig (C); Khan (McDavid-61'), Coleman (Hardison-61')

Lineup vs Turori:
Johnston; Brooks, Finnegan, Bauer (C); Eichorn, Garfield, Wiley, Altman; McDavid; Hardison, Coleman

Lineup vs Banija:
McCormack; Frost, O'Connor, Edmonds; Park, D'Alessandro, McFairlaine, Reynolds (C); A Knight; Khan, Craig

by **Electrum** » Sun Jan 22, 2023 12:14 am

The Turnip: Totally Real Acronyms Coming Your Way (TRACYW)
by Billiam Maskey, chief-editor-in-chief

Hello Turnip chompers, welcome to the newest article of The Turnip. In this article we'll be giving TRACYW. TRACYW is an extremely real acronym that we use because Electrumite internet culture has evolved and flourished into its on warped version of the global interwebs. Memes are not simply something to be laughed at. They are expressions of art and culture that we must take very seriously.

MGTOW - My Gran Tripped Only Westwardly - This refers to the phenomena of mostly senile grandparents who run away from the sun. They are often reported lost and usually found keeling over in the street moving westwards, away from the everlasting march of the sun (and probably their eventual deaths).

DTF - As explained, means Down To Fart - When you are at the stage of a friendship or a relationship where you may toot your own butt without fear of embarrassment.

DFTBA - Damn, Father Tripped Backwards Again - It's a bit of an indictment of our culture to have several intialisms and acronyms on people tripping over, I guess that's what happens when our society doesn't place a premium on smooth walking surfaces.

LOL - Lots of Livers - We're a nation of foodies and it's something we expect from our pate. LOL. Also used by Euran organ smugglers who hawk their organs across the border in our way more prosperous nation. Also used by people with supernumerary livers.

TMI - The Mice Infestation - Use it when you have a mice infestation in the house. When you say that you have so much mice in your mouse that there are mice coming out of the mice, people say TMI!

WTF - Water The Fields - An "agricultural" meme.

FTW - F*** The Win - Used when you want to completely give up on a match that you are clearly losing by a large margin and resort to physically attacking the opponent. If you're getting humiliated, humiliate them back.

IANAL - I Am Not A Lout - We are a very cultural nation, we do not do flares, and we certainly do not behave in an uncouth manner. Therefore, whenever someone disputes your honour, you must say IANAL.

RIP - Rip 'im purposefully - A common saying by mobsters. A common execution method that you can imagine in your head that involves ripping. But then people ask, how do you know what the mobsters say? Aren't they usually quiet like? Well little pipsqueak, not many people survive hearing what a mobster says so SHUT IT or i'll RIP YOU.

KHIII - Kwisatz Haderach III - No, this does not refer to a video game, don't be ridiculous. Instead this is referring to the super being that can look through past memories through space and time. We've had two in the past, Paul Atreides and The Computator, and now we're hoping that me, Billiam Maskey, will be the third. I've done some intense training lately and I reckon I could become a fifth dimensional superbeing at any moment now.

by **Tumbra** » Sun Jan 22, 2023 12:59 am

Zwangzug 3-0 Tumbra

TMB (4-2-3-1): 1 - V Jones; 2 - M Hawthorn, 4 - S Kerr, 5 - L Pearson (14 - F Sinclair, 67'), 19 - C Baumgartner (3 - A Crittenden, 55'); 15 - L McCormick, 16 - C Maguire, 10 - N Coleman (23 - E Ferguson, 79'); 7 - R Haines (17 - M Ferris, 67'), 21 - D Silverwood; 11 - V Anderson (22 - A Haller, 79')

TMB scorers: Nil

Player of the Match: Ryota Imamura [ZWZ]
Tumbra 5-3 Loyo

TMB (4-2-3-1): 12 - M Hahn; 2 - M Hawthorn (18 - S Pearson, 72'), 4 - S Kerr, 20 - M Barker (5 - L Pearson, 72'), 3 - A Crittenden; 15 - L McCormick, 8 - V Morris (25 - J Lawrence, 83'), 10 - N Coleman; 7 - R Haines (17 - M Ferris, 83'), 9 - A Pearson; 11 - V Anderson (26 - T Barker, 86')

TMB scorers: Stephen Kerr (14'), Rebecca Haines (36'), Vivianne Anderson (48', 53'), Audrey Pearson (77')

Player of the Match: Rebecca Haines [TMB]

Robin Vaughn officially announces un-retirement from international football

Former Tumbran national team captain Robin Vaughn officially announced in a short press conference that he was intending to make himself available for selection for the national team once more. The move comes amidst Tumbra ramps up preparations for the hosting of the 93rd edition of the World Cup, which would place the nation "amongst the hallowed halls" of sporting greatness, according to Culture Minister Ben Hooper. Vaughn, who in an 8-year long national team career following the country's switch from the Tamarindian Football Association to the World Cup Committee managed to accrue 181 caps and score 63 goals, announced his retirement before the previous World Cup held in Vilita and Electrum; but sources have claimed that Vaughn was never fully on-board with his own decision. A disappointing exit from the World Cup — a 0-0 loss to TJUN-ia — only confirmed the winger's doubts about his decision.

Tumbran manager Yuan Zilai, in a press conference following Tumbra's 5-3 victory over Baptism of Fire champions Loyo in the 15th Eagles' Cup, responded that it "was always welcome" to see Vaughn wanting to lace up his boots again, and that the mercurial Lakewood City captain would be "given due consideration" as the Tumbran national team prepares to embark on a 22-match campaign to simulate the rigours of an actual World Cup qualification campaign. The Black Eagles, due to their status as hosts of the upcoming World Cup, are exempt from the 180-team gruelling qualifying gauntlet that will determine the 30 teams joining them and Chromatika in the world's premier international sporting event.

Environment minister to attend Rushmori climate conference as Prime Minister staves off imminent party rebellion

In a move that some political analysts have mooted as a potential snub, the federal government today announced that Energy and Environment minister, Jessica Collins, would be attending the CORNCOB climate action conference hosted by growing allies Græntfjall. The move came as a relative surprise to most, as most expected Prime Minister Stephen Williams to attend the conference as the Tumbran representative. However, with Tumbra only being able to attend in an observational capacity, other analysts have said that Williams' biggest priority is staving off an imminent party-line rebellion led by the more conservative faction of his party, and sending Collins — a known ally of Williams — would ensure that he would be able to carry out a planned, large-scale Cabinet reshuffle.

The Prime Minister, who has reportedly seen opposition to his plan of merging several of the twenty-five Tumbran states to reduce their total to ten from within the Cabinet, is keen to stamp his authority on the party, especially following disappointing state election results which saw two Liberal premiers in Alexandria and Westmond lose to insurgent Labour campaigns, while the party would fall short of claiming government in Fremont. While most election post-mortems have attributed the results of the state elections to local issues, some within the conservative wing of the Liberal Party have reportedly pointed the finger squarely at the Prime Minister for the defeats, and have apparently been urging Justice Minister Lawrence Newell, the faction leader, to challenge Williams to a leadership spill.

It is expected that the resignation of Newell to challenge Williams for the post of party leader would precipitate the cabinet reshuffle, during which time Williams is expected to essentially clear most of the leading conservatives in Cabinet and replace them with more ideologically moderate ministers as he prepares to take the case for the state mergers to the country next year.

Federal public sector union reportedly considering industrial action in response to downsizing plans

The PSWU (Public Sector Workers' Union), the main trade union representing public sector workers, is expected to embark on industrial action as a form of protest against plans made by the federal government to "trim fat" from the civil service. The government is expected to merge or eliminate over thirty statutory boards — often derisively named "alphabet soup" in reference to the seemingly-endless acronyms used to describe said statutory boards — in a cost-cutting measure over the next 5 years, impacting over 4,000 civil servants. PSWU leader Edwin Christensen mentioned that they would not "take this lying down," with "the work each of our members do being vital to the functioning of the country."

The minister of state for the civil service, Jay Edwards, could not be reached for comment.

by **Independent Athletes from Quebec** » Sun Jan 22, 2023 2:14 am

Quebec and Shingoryeo is a complicated nation. It is a nation known for its long history, progressivist politics, love of cannabis and fondness for unique cuisine and high fashion. It is also home to people who can be lucid and arrogant, proud and self-aware, and yet both serious and romantic, and their views towards the nation would absolutely vary due to strong regionalism, even for a country best remembered for the dual-city rivalry between its two dominant metropolises, Joongyeong and Songak.

So it can feel as if the Quebecois people are gentle - no, they aren't known for being nice, there's a huge difference between being gentle and nice - but cold in nature. What people would often miss out on this, however, is that this isn't because of the said stereotypes, though some people are genuine arseholes, but rather that the perennially cold, snow-filled climate their nation is subjected to on a year-round basis, forces them to speak faster, louder, and in spurts of some abbreviations in order to save time and not have you and themselves freeze much longer while talking.

The matter of abbreviations and numbering customs are interesting, and it is an interesting topic to talk about. With that said, there is just one problem - where can we talk about them? Unlike in the other countries, there's not really a class-based divide on it, and though regionally the way those abbreviation-filled sentences are filled may sound different, it may as well be better defined by the difference of accents used in the Shingoryeoite Korean accents than anything. With this in mind, perhaps something more ubiquitous has to be used, and in the case of the Quebecois people, it comes down to either the matter of culture or....sports.

Now, now, there are nothing particularly exceptional or notable about the Quebecois people's use of nicknames, or their tendencies. The nation is divided along regional, linguistic and to much lesser extent denominations and trying to generalise it would be futile. So we would have to simplify the customs and focus on the specifics here, and is there any better example of this than the jerseys?

The Quebecois sportspeople, for the most part, put their surnames on the back of their jerseys. There is no written regulation about it, though attempts have been made in past by the Royal Quebecois Olympic Committee (RQOC) to regulate the process, and people usually not coming from posh backgrounds usually put their full surnames, hyphenated or not. But then, in this country, almost everybody's surnames not primarily of Koreanophone backgrounds are hyphenated anyway - hence some of the most distinguished Quebecois footballers having long names. Like Enrico and Hazel Hanson-Conavacio (football, basketball), Kate Huitema-Omeasoo (football), Abel and Natalie Wesoloski-Okafor (football, volleyball), and the most difficult-sounding of them all, Tatiana Llnagaay-Kondratyuk (artistic gymnastics). Really, we are not short of examples.

But not everybody put their surnames on the back of the jersey, or at least try to say more than just their surnames. Those with Koreanophone surnames can most likely relate to this, especially as there may be more than one 'Kim's' or 'Park's' in the team, and traditionally those with a Koreanophone first name do not hyphenate their surnames, a relic dating back to the now-removed 1825 'Code on Shingoryeoite Surnames' that continues to this day. In those cases they usually put their full names, or place the initials of their first name in front of their surname. Think of Kang Gwang-Heui, the Quebecois goalkeeper now playing her talents with Ko-orenite powerhouse Aminey SC, who wears G. H. Kang on the back of her goalkeeper shirt. It's as straight as that.

There are also other cases where the player would not exactly want to write down their surnames, not because they don't like their family or anything, but because of other family members involved in the sport. Let's go back to Enrico and Hazel Hanson-Conavacio here - the two-sport siblings are often remembered for their own heroics, with the brother on the swan song of his career with Myana and the Grim Reapers, and the sister cementing her legacy as an all-time small forward after the Olympic gold two years ago in Twin Cities.
In those two cases, the siblings have made different choices, with Enrico wearing 'Enrico' for his #10 and Hazel 'Hanson-Conavacio' for her #69 (nice). The difference here, while sounding odd, is rather straightforward - their father, Grim Reapers' legend and a longtime manager Leonardo, is considered to be 'the Conavacio' in the sport with many, even with Enrico's long list of accolades with his club, considering him to be greater due to his World Cup heroics. So there's already that pressure from the son, whose decision to just play under his surname, comes to do with it. This did not apply to her daughter, who did play international football and domestically for Haligonian FC until age 28, because her primary sport's basketball not football, and there's no mistake for confusion or attempt to eclipse a family member on the matter.

On the other hand, the same level of creativity or variety isn't exactly present in Quebec and Shingoryeo. The Quebecois are a meticulous, organised bunch whose drive exists to cover for whatever the organisational chaos that may be thrown their way, and sometimes outliers exist from the usual pattern the hot-blooded people of Anaia and AO are known for.

For example with the federational titles, the Quebecois are known to be not that exciting after all. About half of them have a capitalised R placed in front of the actual title, which suggests the coalition of the royalty and the brahmins' accumulation of wealth to the real R - that of the economic, political and of course sporting 'arrr'-piracy (also shortened in the academic circle as RPiracy). The rest, in the meanwhile, have a fairly generic 'XX Quebec' that nobody gets impressed about, though occasional confusion of entire Hockey Coach to your club head coach (hc), or Rugby Quebec to a recruiting coordinator does happen now and then lead into confused looks on your work chat.

This is not to say that the Quebecois, even with their relatively serious nature, lack humour. In the past the Quebecois have proposed the likes of international bodies to adopt nicknames like Cricket Board of Trueanaia (CBT), Association of Olympic Committees (AOC) or Board of Oceanic Nations' Knickerbonkers (BONK). While these ideas have never made it past their respective organisations, at least those office interns tried hard enough to not stay bored while on their internships, and their hard effort should be rewarded through a second try, perhaps with a contract post-graduation.....

by **Electrum** » Sun Jan 22, 2023 2:55 am

^{MATCHDAY 3}

Cocoa-bo Challenge Trophy
Eagles Club Group
Banija 0–0 Nephara
Commonwealth of Baker Park 2–5 Turori
Eagles Select Group
Graintfjall 2–4 Independent Athletes from Quebec
Pemecutan 1–0 Electrum

Cup of Champions
Champions Group
Saint Eleanor 0–1 Tumbra
Loyo 0–2 Zwangzug
Confederations Group
Tikariot 2–2 Flavovespia
Trolleborg 2–0 Valanora

^{MATCHDAY 4}

Cocoa-bo Challenge Trophy
Eagles Club Group
Nephara 0–1 Turori
Commonwealth of Baker Park 3–0 Banija
Eagles Select Group
Independent Athletes from Quebec 1–0 Electrum
Pemecutan 3–1 Graintfjall

Cup of Champions
Champions Group
Tumbra 0–1 Zwangzug
Loyo 1–0 Saint Eleanor
Confederations Group
Flavovespia 0–2 Valanora
Trolleborg 0–1 Tikariot

^{GROUP STANDINGS}

Cocoa-bo Challenge Trophy Standings

Eagle's Club Group                 Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Turori                             4   3  1  0   10   5  +5   10
2 Banija                             4   1  2  1    3   4  −1    5
3 Nephara                            4   1  1  2    4   5  −1    4
4 Commonwealth of Baker Park         4   1  0  3    6   9  −3    3

Eagle's Select Group               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Independent Athletes from Quebec   4   3  1  0    7   2  +5   10
2 Pemecutan                          4   2  0  2    7   7   0    6
3 Graintfjall                        4   2  0  2    9  11  −2    6
4 Electrum                           4   0  1  3    1   4  −3    1

Cup of Champions Standings

Champions Group                    Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Zwangzug                           4   4  0  0    7   0  +7   12
2 Tumbra                             4   2  0  2    6   7  −1    6
3 Saint Eleanor                      4   1  0  3    3   3   0    3
4 Loyo                               4   1  0  3    4  10  −6    3

Confederations Group               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Valanora                           4   2  1  1    8   5  +3    7
2 Tikariot                           4   2  1  1    6   7  −1    7
3 Flavovespia                        4   1  2  1    5   6  −1    5
4 Trolleborg                         4   1  0  3    3   4  −1    3

Roleplay Challenges ::
Roleplay Challenges will be offered to help inspire contributions that will be both Fun, Informative to your opposition and historically relevant for future usage in your nations World Building or factbooks! Feel Free to go back and complete the earlier Challenge(s) if you missed them!

MD1: CONTRUCT-A-CHALLENGE :: Every Nation is unique and brings its own flair to the competition, and so are the styles of the media sent to the matches. What dream story have your media always wanted to write about but never had the chance as they were forced to focus on meeting the daily deadline and publishing out that match report? Prompt+: What RP Challenge would *you* like to see in this tournament? Pop any submission into a box in your Roster or first RP and anything received may be selected at random to be used for the field on select MD's.

MD3: RIDICULOUS ACRONYMS AND INITIALISMS :: Every Nation has got its own ridiculous acronyms, initialisms and backronyms. From the CORNCOB of Graintfjall to SPECTRE from the totally-fake "James Bond" universe. Which ones are used in common parlance in your nation? For example, in Electrum, DTF means "Down To Fart?"

MD5: VIRAL CONTENT :: Every Nation has had its fair share of pandemics, misery and plagues. Has this ever happened in your nation? And if your nation is one of those nations that is always perfect and has no illnesses, what kind of content and memes go viral on social media? Do they take the form of ten second videos, or are they a multiple long video series of someone being chased by hunters while trying to complete a video game?

Note: A reminder that the next cutoff will have the results for MD5 only, with MD6 coming in the cutoff after.

by **Turori** » Sun Jan 22, 2023 3:43 am

twii.tur is a short message communication service based in Turori allowing users to exchange content of 140 characters or less. The service originated as a way to allow officials to receive alerts and key information such as incoming weather notifications, major events and the ability to stay coordinated during a time of crisis but was under-utilized and doubts were raised as to whether the overhead of the infrastructure was worthwhile to maintain.. The latest new feature added to the twii.tur service is the strings feature which is activated using the squiggly function. It is marketing season once again at twii.tur and the Information sharing service is expected to be announcing new partnerships with the NSSCRA Team Tropicorp organization as well as some minor sponsorship opportunities with other athletes throughout events such as the AOCAR where twii.tur is the official sponsor of the twii.tur Playoff shootout in the AOCAR Stock Car Series. twii.tur also maintains personal services contracts with a number of athletes throughout the Vilitan Cove. One such athlete is Turorian youngster Tsinuzpa Rana’aiao who shares their love and commitment to the sport and through twii.tur can communicate it in a way that the existing user base of twii.tur could associate with.

In addition to their coverage of sport as a core business area, twii.tur often has a physical presence at sporting events with displays such as photo booths where fans can pretend to be a World Class Footsport player or strap in behind the wheel of a World Grand Prix racing machine and twii.tur representatives instantly post the image to the users twii.tur account. twii.tur will hope to have Social booths at the majority of events at the XV Olympic Games with each official facility and fanzone having a photo booth to transform fans into the action of whichever event was being contested at that venue. At select locations guests may also have the opportunity to spin a prize wheel to earn special edition collectibles from the Olympic Games including Sunglasses, Socks, Pens and communication device grippers emblazoned with the Twii.tur and Olympic Logos.

TURORI NATIONAL ✓

@TuroriNat
Wins over Baker Park and Nephara see the #Eels cruising atop the Eagles Club Group in the Cocoa-bo Challenge Trophy!

#EaglesCup - #TURvNPH - #CCT

 Turori 5 - 2 Commonwealth of Baker Park	
	Turori Goals:	:: 29' Turakia Diijelhma:: 30' Turakia Diijelhma:: 45' Kiidallen Aeroluzzi:: 53' Kinabo Telioa:: 77' Loala Inkabu          
	Stats :: Turori	:: Possession: 54%:: Shots: 13:: Corners: 13 :: Commonwealth of Baker Park :: Possession: 46%:: Shots: 4:: Corners: 7
	Turori Lineup ::	Derizi Amatopa, Planio’o Nrujsa, Karek Edgeli, Biliki Rona'atu'i, Daliora Toru'u, Kiidallen Aeroluzzi (Kinabo Telioa 45'), Lati'ala Giaoka (Tizsana Iretziia 45'), Cuoabaza Orani’aoa, Loala Inkabu, Nua'oma Aikiki, Turakia Diijelhma

 Turori 1 - 0 Nephara	
	Turori Goals:	:: 7' Turakia Diijelhma              
	Stats :: Turori	:: Possession: 45%:: Shots: 5:: Corners: 9 :: Nephara :: Possession: 55%:: Shots: 1:: Corners: 0
	Turori Lineup ::	Derizi Amatopa, Bvalis Amaanara (Moumouni Verre'elali 73'), Planio’o Nrujsa, H’munao Cagomia (Kinabo Telioa 62'), Kiidallen Aeroluzzi (Lutara Makakio 72'), Cuoabaza Orani’aoa, Lati'ala Giaoka, Tulaki Rauogba, Tizsana Iretziia, Nua'oma Aikiki, Turakia Diijelhma

by **Flavovespia** » Sun Jan 22, 2023 8:28 am

Hive is the home of viral content in Flavovespia. Established in 10AU, some 40 years ago now, it was a new social media network that took off in the nation. With 300 characters limited in a post, and just 30 seconds for video clips, few suspected it would take off, compared to its more established rivals. Hive however, had the advantage of being a Flavovespian based company, and it gained traction amongst the younger generations. In particular, the recruitment of several high profile celebrities, in particular in the sports world.

Viral content can come in a variety of forms, and what goes viral can still befuddle many, but there’s a general trend. Looking in particular at football, there’s several potential sources. Firstly, the wonder goals, or “absolute worldies” as they’re often nicknamed. Expect any of Flavovespia’s top talents who score from long range in a big game to have that clip shared repeatedly. This is even more so now that all major broadcasters have a dedicated account and no longer keep highlights hidden until the end of the game. However Flavovespians love an underdog, and the Flavovespia Gold Cup is often a source of those. Any lower league player scoring a great goal, especially against Super League opposition, can be propelled to a brief moment of fame. When James Daly of at the time non-league Waldster Junction got his hat trick against Carston Green, he managed to use that fame to boost his family’s local café, with Daly becoming something of a feel good story. Just last season, Rajnikanth Pillai had a brief flurry of fame, as he headed Calhead Rangers into a famous win at nearby Langmere Green Rovers.

Of course, it’s not just the good moments that can go viral. Calamitous, comedic moments are prone to going viral. Just ask any player who’s gone tumbling off the pitch, into an advertising hoarding, or sometimes even over an advertising hoarding. Journeyman left back John Rae was one play who seemed notorious for making viral clips of flying off the pitch and into something on the sidelines, due to his tendency to never give up on chasing a ball, and the speed in which he went for slide tackles. Players have also found themselves going viral if their foot gets tangled in the goal netting, or rarely, snagged on the goal post. There’s already inherent humour in those sorts of blunders, doubly so for players who take themselves too seriously.

And of course, it’s not just on the pitch that things can go viral. Players themselves can make posts, which can get views, likes and responses. Several footballers and football personalities, for better or worse, have a big presence. The previously mentioned Roberto Goncalves was no less outspoken behind the screen than he was on the pitch and in interviews, his posts could often go viral and create drama with that. Lucky Diamond, one of the most eccentric goalkeepers in the game, also had a reputation for creating viral content. As well as a tendency to take aim at critics of himself or his teammates, his wild off the field persona could lead to some unusual stories, including the whole goat saga, although that’s a story for another time. Former ICTV Sports Pundit and now independent football journalist Clive Perry often goes viral, for his controversial takes that can often draw the ire of others. And finally, let’s not forget the fictional, often farcical pundit Joe Kerr. Despite the name, their absurdist takes on the days events can often catch out others who reply in earnest. “Being Joe Kerr’d” is a bit of a meme, victims include Clive Perry himself, and ex-Flavovespia international Paul Rodwell.

by **Graintfjall** » Sun Jan 22, 2023 10:56 am

Græntfjall – 2 (1)
Hanif; Ayaan (11’), Klængur (30’), Asbjørn, Harmony (79’ Drengur ); Vanessa, Johanna (c) (50’), Valtter (21’) (79’ Kala ), Elvira; Kæja (41’ Steinar ); Guðfinnur (56’ Emilia )

Quebec – 4 (1)
McTavish (38’), Kim (61’), Vanderley (84’), Wilson-Didh (90+1’)

Pemecutan – 3 (2)
Mahayana (11’), Karyadi (35’), Kusumajaya (77’)

Græntfjall – 1 (1)
Hanif; Ayaan (65’ Harmony ), Klængur, Asbjørn, Drengur; Johanna (c) (71’), Valtter (63’) (65’ Kjárr ), Steinar (63’) (68’ Kala ); Vanessa (44’) (87’ Þrastar ), Guðfinnur (33’) (68’ Emilia ), Elvira

Selection of articles from Græntfjaller news media.

Superior Pemecutan thrash listless (and Kæja-less) Snow Wolves in Eagl’e’s’ Cup setback

Queen on VODAIS role: “I’m not a hero. I put on my pants just like everyone else, one gold-leaf-embroidered leg at a time”

Defense Department dismisses ICCPD report as “baseless”

Also in the news:

Hockey players return to PHL action concluding bans over historic offensive social media posts
Qardinal pays record fine over customer data privacy mishandling: “Will someone help me saw this watch in half?” asks CFO
Þórhallursson arrival in Squornshelous tops weekly InstaSnap trending
Political parties’ spending on social media marketing points to the new future of election campaigns – exclusive report
OnlyFlans: the controversial new site taking the internet by storm

by **Pemecutan** » Sun Jan 22, 2023 6:42 pm

Soma Wage Wuku Medangsia, Pawukon 1784

New Strategy, New Luck

Tegeh Kori - Following the bad start, Pramana, the national team's manager decided to change their strategy to face the following matches of Eagle's Cup. These matches were held at home soil where the Serdadu Tridatu were ready to support their national team. Pramana change the formation from 5-3-2 to the classic form of 4-4-2. He cut off Ngurah Agung Rai Putra from central back who's not playing at his best while adding Agus Setiahadi to the starting 11. On the other hand, Satya Permadi is selected for the main substitute.

The change give a little improvement when they met Electrum in the continuation of the Group Stage. The match was played tightly with both teams failed to shoot on target. Pemecutan's goal was on high alert a few times as Electrumite attackers build up tension on the field. But as was said before, none attempts were becoming goal. Starting the second half, Pemecutanian initiated a surprise attack. The unprepared Electrumite defenders were shocked as Pemecutanian midfielders and forwards were passed throunf them. Electrum immediately build up their defense and able to slow down the attack. Kusumajaya made a long pass to Atmaja who was then breaking into the defense. He soon to swarmed with the defenders. But he saw a glimpse of chance. He made a short pass to Olivando who was left unguarded. As Olivando received the ball, the defenders immediately noticed their mistake. Olivando shoot to the left corner of the goal just before a defender try to tackled him. The shoot went smoothly through the goal. Passed in between the goalkeeper's hands who tried to blocked it. 1-0 for Pemecutan.

Being 1 goal behind, Electrumite forces started a counter attacks. While Pemecutan change the strategy to more defensive. There were several attempts and dangerous shots on goal but Wira Putra together with Pemecutanian defenders were able to blocked them. Bombarded with attacks didn't meant that Pemecutan didn't have a chance to counter it. They've managed one or two attacks in between those offensive marches. But still to no avail. Pramana even substitute Mahayana with W. Pramana to give a refreshment in the forward. But the substitute seems to be too late. The whistle was blown and the match ended in 1-0 for Pemecutan.

High spirited with their first win, the White Myna was ready to face the Snow Wolves at home. They were determined to avenged their defeat in the first meeting. Pemecutan was controlling right from the start. The luck seems to shine upon them as they've made a surprise goal in the 11th minute. Pemecutan widen their lead with a second goal by Rama Karyadi. And despite Græntfjall was able to scored a goal, Pemecutan end the match with a third goal from Kusumajaya.

These results catapult Pemecutan position in the Group. They are now sitting at second place although with the same match results with the third placement, Græntfjall. However, they are better at goal difference than the Snow Wolves. Two matches left, 1 at home and 1 away. These matches are crucial. The other home match is against Quebec, the team that defeat them with 2 goals. While the last match is against Electrum that they defeats with only one goal. The chances are slim as they always said the ball is round. But "We'll take all the chances that we have to get the points," quoting Pramana's statement after the match against Græntfjall. The manager would likely to retain the current composition as it seems to be more successful. Although this form is differ from the usual 4-3-3 that the national team usually do. Will we see Pramana experimenting again in the future?

by **Loyo** » Sun Jan 22, 2023 8:38 pm

The People’s Republic of Loyo | National Football Team

Manager: Tsujii Matashichi, 36
Captain: Cora Takeshi, 34
Formation: 4-4-2
Style Modifier: -2

Starting XI

•GK Soetanto Honghai, 31
•LB Stephen Hutasuhut, 28
•CB Luka Devayne, 31
•CB Arthur Kingly, 30
•RB Shinzo Liucci, 29
•LM Harrison Smithini, 30
•CMF Fletcher Spadini, 30
•CMF Clint Cetti, 34
•RM Joss Saturnalis, 32
•CF Cora Takeshi, 34
•CF King Blanche, 32

Bench/Reserve Players

•GK Hannah Hoya, 25

•WB Woosan Julius, 28
•WB Matias Sastre, 24
•CB Lucius Love, 28
•CB Sebastian Bilbao, 25

•CMF Osuma Jinaowa, 33
•CMF Seth Lambosa, 29
•MF Ali Cemal, 28
•MF Mo Guanyu, 28
•MF Jasper Celadon, 26

•CF Hakan Risamasu, 31
•CF Jeremi Argayagoyena, 30
•CF Ichinomiya Yoshiaga, 28

Football is growing inside Loyo. Children play the game in the streets, kicking balls made from factories across the islands. Passionate fans crowd around fields that were once used for farming, but now host traveling groups of footballers that thrill locals with a still somewhat foreign game. Small-town celebrities have been made overnight with stellar performances loudly applauded. Grade schools are abuzz with talk of domestic and international stars, and flush with trading cards of each.

The People's National Sporting Committee fired Han Tamada after a disappointing record after leading the national team to a Baptism of Fire 79 victory. After beloved captain and goalkeeper Tsujii Matashichi retired after the Tea Cup, he was appointed to the position of manager. The relationship between the PNSC and the national football team has been shaky ever since the team’s creation, but a period of relative calm has been preserved. A disappointing AOCAF campaign was the new manager's first taste of international experience, and it was a rough one, with a 0-1-4 record.

Politics within the national team kept the squad mostly intact. Reserve goalkeeper Hannah Hoya and reserve center back Lucius Love are the only additions. The squad was heartbroken by the firing of the charismatic and foundational Tamada, but was energized by the appointment of their former captain. Tamada played an instrumental role in the establishment of the sport in Loyo, and his mentorship of Matashichi means that the elder’s influence might be entirely gone from the national team. The best player on the pitch is likely to be creative midfielder Osuma Jinaowa, who has been a present force in the squad.

My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers: Yes
Godmod scoring events: Yes
RP injuries to my players: Yes
Godmod injuries to my players: Yes, let me know the injury and how long they’ll be out for.
Hand out yellow cards to my players: Yes
Hand out red cards to my players: Yes
Godmod other events: Yes, no deaths please!

by **Zwangzug** » Mon Jan 23, 2023 5:38 pm

Given that the earth is, according to most standard geographical references, approximately a sphere, and that there are a multitude of countries and people who inhabit that earth with dreams of glory, we consider it virtually certain that this planet has a north and a southern pole, and almost as certain that someone, sometime in history, has reached those extremes. Probably many someones, on many occasions. We could not tell you who achieved either feat first. What we can tell you is that they were certainly not Zwangzugians. The approximate history of Zwangzugian polar exploration is as follows:

Mainlander: So, what's beyond the farthest islands, if you keep going north?
Islander: Pwobably just moh watuh.
Mainlander: And beyond that?
Islander: Duh home of du nodun stah, I guess?
Mainlander: Really?
Islander: Yeah, weally, we have constellations and stuff up heew too, they'uw impohtant fo culchu and stuff.
Mainlander: Yeah, but do people go up there like in person?
Islander: Not if dey want to come back alive.
Mainlander: Oh, okay.

Or:

Foreigner: You know, there are countries in the southern half of the world, too?
Mainlander (consulting a globe): Math checks out.
Foreigner: Some of us are going to go see what's on the far side of them.
Mainlander: You have fun with that.
Foreigner: We have, like, colonies and stuff down there, so that helps to have a foothold.
Mainlander: Okay? Sounds fake but okay?

Etc.

This means that everything Zwangzugians know about polar exploration has been filtered through the lens of the rest of the world's discoveries, both in history and in popular culture. In particular, we must acknowledge the cultural debt owed to Terra Nova, the cult classic TV series from Albionia.

While the subplots are finely-plotted spectacles in their own right (the "Winter Journey" arc to research penguin eggs, the miraculous survival of the "Inexpressible Island" crew), the main cast can be summarized as follows: a team of explorers from the mighty Albionian Empire attempt to make history as the first party to reach the world's southernmost latitude. They arrive to discover they have been beaten to the punch by a Skandilund team, and on the way back, everyone dies.

The original series was widely panned, both in Albionia and elsewhere. For one thing, the special effects were terrible. The cast is considered disappointingly undiverse by contemporary standards, almost all of the named characters being Peridune Albionian males (the more charismatic and successful Skandilund explorers being relegated to flashbacks and dream sesquences). Most importantly, the actors' very limited expressive capacity and the stilted, highly florid writing style, played off each other to absurd effect; when the musical cues etc. were clearly intending to make a point about noble self-sacrifice or virtue in the face of defeat, the extremely circumlocutionary script called for a faceless voiceover about "it appears as if our circumstances are following a suboptimal trajectory," leading to bathos.

Such a production would have been quickly forgotten about--had it not been for the charisma of the director-auteur, Scottie Kestrel. In follow-up interviews and directors' commentary tracks, he pointed out the dramatic ironies of the production--the futility of "national" or "imperial" endeavor, the looming war hinted at in the background, the vulnerability of penguins and glaciers alike to future climate change, even a dark and edgy statutory rape plotline that got cut from one of the protagonist's backstories. In this light, Terra Nova was reimagined, not as a pompous melodrama, but as a subversive deconstruction. This likely accounts for its syndication and ensuing popularity.

However, while the episodes themselves were distributed far and wide, Kestrel's commentary and its cultural context did not always follow. To a Zwangzugian audience, the context of war and empire was missing--the existence of an "Albionian Empire" was accepted as a mere plot device that provided the crew with sufficient resources to attempt the venture. The actors' lack of skillful body language or facial cues was not considered a detraction, most local critics being too dense to intuit what qualifies as a talented performance. And extreme circumlocutions? It turns out, Zwangzugians love extreme circumlocutions. Terra Nova became popular here because, not in spite of, the features that made it flop the first time around.

The stereotype of a "stiff upper lip" has never been one applied to our society, nor would it make much sense; as just mentioned, the stereotypical Zwangzugian lacks the finesse to compel their facial expression to do their bidding. But the concept being indirectly referenced--that even when one is troubled, one oughtn't complain by word or deed (voluntary reactions, rather than instinctive expressions, being subject to free will), which would only create troubles for others--is something that is very deeply rooted in the local culture. Fans' admiration of the "heroes" is not because their stoicism was peculiarly Albionian, or even peculiarly Zwangzugian--just because it was "how one should be."

What does this have to do with infectious diseases, or, for that matter, football? We're getting there.

The World Cup 85 qualifiers, in most chronologies, followed shortly after the 48th World Baseball Classic. The Zebras did not participate in WBC48, having been mostly absent since edition 31; they would, however, return in WBC49 and have been consistent participants ever since. What this means is that most Zwangzugian fans were only distantly aware of events in The Sherpa Empire, which had emerged as a baseball powerhouse, during that cycle. In fact, the "SARS 2" virus had emerged in the Hankou-Wuchang regions, leading to some quarantine measures in that country.

This development, like almost all other foreign news, was blithely ignored by the barnstorming club Rovers United. As their unusual choice of name might imply, they have no true home stadium and instead rotate around fields without a home club of their own, such as the Eagles' Club in Forbridge. As they had finished fifteenth out of sixteen clubs, again, their players were not needed for national team duty; instead, during the off-season, they travelled to play a club friendly away in the Sherpa Empire. Upon returning to Wayr Stadium in the Rackham Range--a frequent, if isolated, home for the national team--they learned that the referee had been incapacitated by a dangerous variant of the virus, and they were presumably all carriers already. Quickly, the club chose to stay in their fortuitious isolation, rather than risk starting an epidemic in an unprepared country.

The bleak weather and monotonous diet may not, quite, have rivalled Terra Nova for misery--but the footballers proved themselves every bit as understated as their fictional counterparts. Captain Ryan Welkin-Farr and vice-captain Tessie Murdans schemed to make sure all the players had a chance to give their buy-in, making themselves agents rather than victims. Niels Jin-Kuang demonstrated the age-old truth that music thrives in one's memories and can sustain morale even when ordinary prose is forgotten (although he would also point out that modern Zwangzug has a lot more religious and non-religious diversity than the Albionians, who shared a more unified taste in hymns). And Hallam Vengor's painstaking notes were a testament to the team's clear-eyed conviction; they knew the risks they had accepted, and if none of them had lived to speak for themselves, Vengor or someone else would have meticulously chronicled the details, as much and as far as they could.

One question presents itself immediately: did it matter? Based on the relative stability of both the Sherpa Empire and most of the known sporting world, it seems unlikely that a developed country like Zwangzug could have been completely overwhelmed. The final toll--four deaths, and two other medically-advised retirements--in a pool of twenty-three suggests that the Rovers may have been exposed to a more virulent strain, but circular arguments are kind of dumb. The lesson of Terra Nova should be obvious--South Pole or no South Pole, it's dangerous to prematurely canonize anyone. Laying down your life for a friend might make you great; laying down your life and not getting anything for it just makes you dead.

Zwangzugian attitudes can easily come off as false modesty to foreigners: "oh, you want us to write about all the trophies we've won? Well gosh, we already did that the first time around, it's all there in our collective memory, you can go look it up, wouldn't want to repeat ourselves and pass it off as original journalism, that'd just be unseemly." So, too, with emotional restraint; the harder you work at not dumping your feelings on anyone, the harder it is to take credit for it, and round and round the cycle goes. But even then, some of Kestrel's late appeals to cynicism fall flat. Like, "how dare these characters try to shape the narrative due to their skillful use of language!" Yeah, really, guys, the audacity! Have you tried not being good with words?

Ultimately, the Rovers matter, not because of coming second-bottom (as it were) time and again, but because they did take the narrative into their own hands. Hopefully none of us will have to undergo that particular agony, but everyone suffers in their own way, and we usually don't have the certainty of knowing that anything worthwhile will come of it. We control what we can--our hymns, our muffins, our scores at five-a-side--and hope that in the end, quiet sacrifices can echo more loudly than any scream.

(Helsen-Roan 40, Tery-Wilf 72)
(Nguyen 11)

Bonus crossover content in the WBC

by **Electrum** » Tue Jan 24, 2023 4:14 am

^{MATCHDAY 5}

Cocoa-bo Challenge Trophy
Eagles Club Group
Commonwealth of Baker Park 1–0 Nephara
Banija 4–4 Turori
Eagles Select Group
Pemecutan 2–0 Independent Athletes from Quebec
Graintfjall 2–0 Electrum

Cup of Champions
Champions Group
Loyo 0–6 Tumbra
Saint Eleanor 0–0 Zwangzug
Confederations Group
Trolleborg 0–1 Flavovespia
Tikariot 1–1 Valanora

^{GROUP STANDINGS}

Cocoa-bo Challenge Trophy Standings

Eagle's Club Group                 Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Turori                             5   3  2  0   14   9  +5   11
2 Banija                             5   1  3  1    7   8  −1    6
3 Commonwealth of Baker Park         5   2  0  3    7   9  −2    6
4 Nephara                            5   1  1  3    4   6  −2    4

Eagle's Select Group               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Independent Athletes from Quebec   5   3  1  1    7   4  +3   10
2 Pemecutan                          5   3  0  2    9   7  +2    9
3 Graintfjall                        5   3  0  2   11  11   0    9
4 Electrum                           5   0  1  4    1   6  −5    1

Cup of Champions Standings

Champions Group                    Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Zwangzug                           5   4  1  0    7   0  +7   13
2 Tumbra                             5   3  0  2   12   7  +5    9
3 Saint Eleanor                      5   1  1  3    3   3   0    4
4 Loyo                               5   1  0  4    4  16 −12    3

Confederations Group               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Valanora                           5   2  2  1    9   6  +3    8
2 Flavovespia                        5   2  2  1    6   6   0    8
3 Tikariot                           5   2  2  1    7   8  −1    8
4 Trolleborg                         5   1  0  4    3   5  −2    3

Roleplay Challenges ::
Roleplay Challenges will be offered to help inspire contributions that will be both Fun, Informative to your opposition and historically relevant for future usage in your nations World Building or factbooks! Feel Free to go back and complete the earlier Challenge(s) if you missed them!

MD1: CONTRUCT-A-CHALLENGE :: Every Nation is unique and brings its own flair to the competition, and so are the styles of the media sent to the matches. What dream story have your media always wanted to write about but never had the chance as they were forced to focus on meeting the daily deadline and publishing out that match report? Prompt+: What RP Challenge would *you* like to see in this tournament? Pop any submission into a box in your Roster or first RP and anything received may be selected at random to be used for the field on select MD's.

MD3: RIDICULOUS ACRONYMS AND INITIALISMS :: Every Nation has got its own ridiculous acronyms, initialisms and backronyms. From the CORNCOB of Graintfjall to SPECTRE from the totally-fake "James Bond" universe. Which ones are used in common parlance in your nation? For example, in Electrum, DTF means "Down To Fart?"

MD5: VIRAL CONTENT :: Every Nation has had its fair share of pandemics, misery and plagues. Has this ever happened in your nation? And if your nation is one of those nations that is always perfect and has no illnesses, what kind of content and memes go viral on social media? Do they take the form of ten second videos, or are they a multiple long video series of someone being chased by hunters while trying to complete a video game?

MD6: CULINARY AND CUISINE :: Every Nation has a traditional food culture. What do people eat on the streets? What do people eat in fine dining restaurants? Do they like fusion confusion or do they like simple, traditional dishes? What about your athletes, what's traditional to eat and drink before a match? Tell us everything you can about the food of your country. Please. We're hungry.

World Cup 81/82/83/84

Commonwealth to send delegation to Græntfjall conference
Vincent Molinari III
The Daily Mail National Affairs Writer

Head of State Timothy M. Wentworth will lead the official delegation from Baker Park to the upcoming meeting of Rushmore nations--along with diverse participation from nations across other regions in the multiverse as observers--known as the Conference of Rushmori Nations on Climate, Oceans and Biodiversity.

The major environmental summit, which is brainchild of Græntfjall Prime Minister Kaija Michaelsdóttir, will focus on problems centered around Rushmore, yet with a clear acknowledgement that those issues are not exclusive to the region and cannot be addressed exclusive of any impact on nations outside of Rushmore.

Mr. Wentworth's role is the result of an unprecedented constitutional situation in the history of the Commonwealth in the present circumstance of there being no official government sworn in in the wake of the most recent General Election; the permanent civil servants that function as the day to day supervisory officials below the elected cabinet ministers will take center stage in Altendalur.

Deputy Secretary of State for the Commonwealth Nicholas Griffith, Deputy Minister of the Environment Patricia Chenowerth, Under-Secretary of State for Conservation Robert Trapper, and Under-Secretary of State for Science Dr. Naomi Frasier-Briggs will be joined by Assembly members-elect Gail Offenhauer (F-Danville West), Stephen Connors (LT-Oceana South) and Audrey Jordan (SD-Fairport City East) in the traveling party, which will report back to Parliament on the proceedings after the opening of business in March.
_________________________________________________________________________________________

Bees need reversal of fortune to stay alive
Scott McCrae
The Daily Mail Chief Soccer Writer

The Commonwealth of Baker Park National Team will need a performance equal to their last home effort against Banija if they hope to entertain any chance of advancement to the semi-finals of the Cocoa-bo Challenge Trophy.

Nephara will provide the opposition at Rogers Stadium on matchday five, and BP must take all three points from the return leg against the Cormorants to ensure that their final day trip to Turori is more than a dead rubber.
The Black & Gold earned their first win in this edition of the Eagles Cup with a 3-0 victory over Banija, and look to carry the momentum into their fifth meeting against the Rushmori giants in the last three major competitions.
Rose McCormack turned away all eight shots in recording her seventh international shutout; Park Jae-sung, Fatima Khan and Paige Eichorn off the bench provided the offense to get BP into the win column for the first time as the Bees dominated the Kadongo Kamu.

lineup vs Nephara:

Johnston; Brooks (C), Finnegan, Bauer; Taylor, Eichorn, Wiley, Altman; McDavid; Hardison, Coleman

by **Tumbra** » Tue Jan 24, 2023 9:10 am

POLITICS: PRIME MINISTER RESHUFFLES CABINET, REMOVES CONSERVATIVES, STAMPS AUTHORITY

Straton: In a move far more drastic than most political pundits predicted, Prime Minister Stephen Williams' threatened Cabinet reshuffle occurred on Friday afternoon, substantially altering the dynamics of the Cabinet and the political dynamics of the ruling Liberal Party. The move has been widely interpreted as definitively sidelining the strong conservative faction within the party in favour of giving more power to the junior coalition partners within Williams' government, the National and Moderate Parties.

In a caucus meeting on Thursday, former Law and Justice Minister Lawrence Newell, who himself resigned on Monday to mount a challenge for the Liberal leadership, moved for a spill motion to declare the leadership vacant. Seemingly pre-empting this move, Mr. Williams allowed the spill motion to succeed by asking his faction to abstain from the vote, allowing for the former Cabinet colleagues to go head to head with each other with a vote amongst the assembled Liberal caucus — all two hundred and ninety-one MPs and fifty-nine Senators.

Mr. Newell, the unofficial leader of the Liberal Party's conservative faction, has long been a bugbear and a thorn in the side of Mr. Williams, with the two's private feuds ranging from almost everything from policy to personality being reported as "utterly incompatible" with each other. Mr. Newell and Mr. Williams last went up against each other in the 2025 Liberal party leadership election, with Mr. Williams winning narrowly; as part of a strategy to keep Mr. Newell onside, Mr. Williams has since kept the former onside by giving him his choice of plum Cabinet jobs. Mr. Newell's last portfolio — Law and Justice — was reportedly a personal pick of the former police officer's. Reportedly, this final rift in their relationship was caused by flagging poll numbers placing the Liberal party in danger of losing government if an election were held tomorrow, alongside ongoing policy disagreements regarding the Northlands and transgender rights. A key sticking point has been the Prime Minister's personal initiatives to reform the relationship between the federal governments and the states by merging states into larger provinces; Mr. Newell, who represents a seat in Pesvern, Tumbra's smallest state, has been outspoken on the matter in the short turnaround time between his resignation on Monday and the caucus vote on Thursday. Sources report that Mr. Newell's campaigning was "extremely vigorous", and that he had been "calling in political favours left and right" in a bid to unseat the Prime Minister.

The caucus vote, however, ended up swinging decisively in Mr. Williams' favour — of the 350 assembled parliamentarians, 238, or nearly 70% of the caucus, voted for Mr. Williams over Mr. Newell. Speaking after the vote, Mr. Newell refused to comment on the situation in great detail, with vagaries such as "I intend to continue serving the people of Holsworth to the best of my ability" precluding a more detailed statement on the defeat that had been handed to him by his own colleagues. Now, it seems, the attempted coup has given Mr. Williams an excuse and the ability to move unfettered for the time being, and the Cabinet reshuffle is the first, and most important sign of this.

The wide-ranging shuffle sees only seven of the present twenty-six cabinet members remain in their current posts, with seven members leaving and six promoted into Cabinet. By far the most consequential moves of the Cabinet reshuffle were William Boyd, Moderate Party leader, becoming the sole government representative at the finance ministry, a sign of Mr. Williams' trust towards the centrist, as incumbent Finance Minister Paul McKenzie is shuffled to the Ministry of Foreign Affairs; and Tom Gregory, the incumbent Labour and Pensions minister, shifting to the Ministry of Health, indicating that the government's next priority for reform and possible cuts is the country's healthcare system. Mr. Gregory previously presided over the passage of a welfare reform bill that proponents say have streamlined the various processes and cut the amount of bureaucracy in the oft-beleaguered system, while opponents have said that the bill cuts aid to some of Tumbra's most vulnerable. While the government is not expected to engage in any large-scale privatisation of the health service — an unspoken red line for politicians of all stripes — the appointment of Mr. Gregory in particular has stoked concern amongst healthcare professionals, with some adding a choice letter to the moniker of "Minister of Cuts" that he has attained over his last two years in Straton.

Almost every single hard-hitting conservative in the previous Cabinet has either resigned or been told they are returning to the backbenches; those who remain have been afforded posts more often than not to be seen on the periphery of Cabinet business, with Alexander Morrison, a fast-rising young star within the party's conservative wing, being the chief victim of this. Newell resigned on Monday, bringing his frontbench career to an abrupt pause; while other names often associated with the conservative faction, such as former Foreign Affairs minister Stephanie Williams and former Health minister Vivian White, were given their marching orders. Gerald Kingsley, long seen as a maverick on that same wing, uniquely managed to retain his position as Minister for Defence, with some citing his loyalty towards Mr. Williams even as a member of the party's right as a key factor in the decision, along with the minister's personal popularity. Leader of the House Lucas Clark also stepped down from his position, though that was widely interpreted as a sign that the veteran politician is either preparing to step away entirely from politics or prepare for a presidential run in next year's elections.

It remains to be seen how the markets will respond to the Cabinet reshuffle; they were closed soon after the news and will not re-open until Monday. The lurch towards the centre, however, is expected to be received somewhat positively by the market.

Prime Minister/Minister for the Civil Service/Minister for Northern Affairs             Stephen Williams [LIB - Yarwood, Napier]
Deputy Prime Minister/Minister for Intergovernmental Affairs                            Jon Blair [NAT - Lynham, Clearmont]
Minister for Finance                                                                    William Boyd [MOD - Tamworth, Marlsbruhe]
Minister for Foreign Affairs                                                            Paul McKenzie [LIB - Cantonment, Bechor]
Minister for Home Affairs                                                               Rita Ingham [LIB - Meryton, Bechor]
Minister for Law and Justice/Attorney General's Office                                  Graham Campbell [LIB - Middleby, Straton]
Minister for Defence                                                                    Gerald Kingsley [LIB - Bartley, Gamaliel]
Minister for Commerce and Industry                                                      Michael Greenwood [LIB - Birchmoor, Fremont]
Minister for Health                                                                     Tom Gregory [NAT - Belmont, Napier]
Minister for Education                                                                  Alastair Smith [LIB - Penrith, Marcato]
Minister for Transport                                                                  Ian Cunningham [NAT - Heidelberg, Hamilton]
Minister for Labour and Pensions                                                        Ben Hooper [LIB - Meadowford, Raleigh]
Minister for Agriculture and Natural Resources                                          Bryan Lockhart [NAT - Findlay, Clearmont]
Minister for Urban Development                                                          Jeanette Brown [LIB - Columbia East, Alexandria]
Minister for Regional Development                                                       Jack Hinchcliffe [NAT - Cricklewood, Clearmont]
Minister for Energy and the Environment                                                 Alexander Hurst [LIB - Brendham, Finnley]
Minister for Culture                                                                    Cheryl Edwards [LIB - Kerrick, Marcato]
Minister for International Trade and Development                                        Kate Ford [LIB - Cherrybrook, Hamilton]
Minister for Social Affairs                                                             Shabana Tahir [LIB - Kitchener, Bechor]
Minister for Technology                                                                 George Walker [LIB - Cobham, Clearmont]
Minister without Portfolio                                                              Alexander Morrison [LIB - Shepperton North, Pesvern]
Minister for the Cabinet Office                                                         Jack Shepard [MOD - Gower, Dartmoor]

Also attending Cabinet:
Leader of the Government in the House                                                   Michael Harper [LIB - Millsburgh Tevandale, Grantfeldt]
Leader of the Government in the Senate                                                  Sen. Russell Voinovich [LIB - Senator for Raleigh]
Chief Whip                                                                              Christopher Burgess [LIB - Dunglass, Napier]

OUT:
Lawrence Newell (resigned on Monday, Law and Justice)
Stephanie Williams (Home Affairs)
Vivian White (Health)
Jessica Collins (Energy and Environment)
Julian Smith (International Trade and Development)
Esther Robertson (Technology)
Lucas Clark (Leader of the House)

IN:
Graham Campbell (Law and Justice)
Jeanette Brown (Urban Development)
Kate Ford (International Trade and Development)
Shabana Tahir (Social Affairs)
Jack Shepard (Cabinet Office)
Christopher Burgess (Chief Whip)

SHUFFLED:
Paul McKenzie (Finance to Foreign Affairs)
William Boyd (Second Minister of Finance to Finance)
Rita Ingham (Foreign Affairs to Home Affairs)
Tom Gregory (Labour and Pensions to Health)
Ben Hooper (Cultre to Labour and Pensions)
Alexander Hurst (Social Affairs to Energy and Environment)
Cheryl Edwards (Cabinet Office to Culture)
Alexander Morrison (Urban Development to Minister without Portfolio)
Michael Harper (Minister without Portfolio to Leader of the House)
George Walker (Chief Whip to Technology)

STAYS:
Stephen Williams (Prime Minister)
Jon Blair (Deputy Prime Minister)
Gerald Kingsley (Defence)
Michael Greenwood (Commerce and Industry)
Alastair Smith (Education)
Ian Cunningham (Transport)
Jack Hinchcliffe (Regional Development)

by **Flavovespia** » Tue Jan 24, 2023 3:02 pm

Flavovespians will probably be the first to admit that their food isn’t the most exciting in the world, but they try to aim for dishes that are simple and quick to cook, yet filling. Most Flavovespians will have 3 meals a day, breakfast, lunch and dinner, with breakfast eaten before work, commonly around 7-8am, lunch at 12pm-2pm, and dinner anywhere from 5pm-8pm.

Typical breakfast foods in Flavovespia are pastries, granola with yoghurt, or toast. Outside of the weekend, or a brunch, it’s uncommon for Flavovespians to make a large breakfast or a cooked breakfast. Cafes and grab’n’go style food stalls around train and bus stations service those who take a breakfast to consume on their travels to work (eating on public transport or the street is not considered taboo in Flavovespia, as long as no mess is made). This is usually accompanied with a cup of coffee or a cup of tea, although fruit juice is also another option.

Flavovespians traditionally used have their biggest meal of the day as dinner in the evening, but in the past few decades a rise in big meals at lunchtime and a lighter dinner has come about. Lighter lunches are dishes designed to be prepared and eaten relatively quickly. Sandwiches are commonplace, but other dishes commonly consumed at lunchtime can include bowls of pasta, small pizzas, or savoury filled pastries. If not premade at home, then often grab’n’go shops will specialise in one of the areas. Some have preset menu options, other operate with a selection of bases, sauces and toppings (if applicable), for customers to select from.

The biggest meal of the day is normally at dinner. Whilst historically many meals weren’t much more adventurous than a cut of meat or fish, some potatoes, and a portion of vegetables, over the past decades cuisines from a variety of nations have livened up the palate of Flavovespians. A rise in envirionmental and ethical concerns also means a rise in vegan and vegetarian dishes. Nevertheless, something simple like chicken or salmon in white wine sauce, with potatoes, carrot and peas on the side would be a standard Flavovespian dish. Flavovespians often like to try dishes from abroad, but do also tend to have self doubt about the authenticity of their creations.

One aspect of food that Flavovespians do particularly enjoy is desserts. They always try to make room for a least a small dessert with their main meal of the day. Anything from cakes, to ice cream, to baked pies or sponges are well enjoyed. With honey a food source produced in plentiful quantities within Flavovespia and often exported, it’s no surprise that it also makes appearances in many of Flavovespia’s staple desserts. Cafes serving coffees, cakes and other assorted sweet goods are plentiful in practically every city and town, and the majority of Flavovespians will stop by in one at least once a week. Whilst typically meals during the working week can feel a bit rushed and low-effort, when the weekend rolls around, then Flavovespians will take the time to enjoy their food and drink more, and put in the effort.

by **Graintfjall** » Wed Jan 25, 2023 4:14 pm

Græntfjall – 2 (1)
Hanif; Ayaan, Klængur, Asbjørn, Leona; Johanna (c), Hermann (72’) (88’ Kala ); Vanessa (56’ Þrastar (90+1’)), Kæja (45’ Steinar ), Emilia (74’ Harmony ); Mímir (19’) (88’ Guðfinnur )

Electrum – 0 (0)

Selection of articles from Græntfjaller news media.

Græntfjall on verge of disappointing early Eagl’e’s’ Cup exit despite win over hosts

Vegetarianism and veganism growing among young, older generations still skeptical

Future Dreams

Amanda Guttisdóttir continues move into media work with appearance on “Ready! Steady! Whale!”

Also in the news:

I want to incorporate more color into my everyday looks.
I realized that I feel so much better and more vibrant when I’m wearing something colorful instead of all black, white, gray, or beige.
Like I just drank an extra cup of coffee or a fresh-squeezed glass of orange juice.
Need more of that vibe in my life next year!

by **Zwangzug** » Wed Jan 25, 2023 8:52 pm

The Arlington Moon-Tribune

For twenty-six Zwangzugians--plus Kate DiMarini, plus a gaggle of assistants, loved ones, and hangers-on--the answer to "where were you during the World Cup 92 final?" will be as exciting as one could possibly give: the Olympic Stadium in Centralis, Electrum!

Of course, that means there are also several zillion others, including some of the newcomers to the national team, whose answer is something else.

Is this project more than a little self-aggrandizing? Yes. Does it fill up our column space? Also yes. Will it recur for future generations of players? Possibly. Will this allow us to establish a consistent aging schema? That would make a lot of sense, so probably no.

Saroj Kinnar

Engdahl Institute is located in the west of Nalchoy District. They are one of the more successful university sides in recent years--their former manager, Louise Halldorson, has gone on to manage in Tumbra and Audioslavia--and won back-to-back titles in Kinnar's junior and senior seasons.

A nice thing about hanging out with friends who play sports is they're only superstitious about themselves. Like, 'I have to listen to the same playlist before every game' or 'I'm not gonna shave until we're out of the playoffs'--sure, good try, you were never gonna shave anyway, you're just a caveman. Uh, but the point is, as silly as it sounds, if it helps put them in the right frame of mind, like they're in control, then great, do it. They understand that superstitions don't matter for other teams, you can't be like 'oh no this team thousands of miles away conceded because I wasn't wearing my lucky shirt'...things...don't work that way. I wish this wasn't such a problem but apparently I just have really weird friends.

The point is, it was evening our time. A bunch of us were at Jenny's dorm [Jenny McKinlay was one of the players on the Engdahl team] and I figured I'd rather do that, it would be nice to be around mostly people who get football. I mean not everybody did, Ben [Viske-Davis] brought his boyfriend and he was mostly yelling at the refs and trying to ask a bunch of questions about who was on the Banija team, and we were like--can we talk about this later? We'd be happy to look it up but, you know, we're kind of busy here...

One of the stereotypes about Namiri is that we're all the kind of people who would gather around a huge big screen outside because we like being part of a group, caught up with something, even if it's on the other side of the world. And I think there probably is some truth to that, if you go back to Guariday or wherever, there's a lot of my family who were probably be doing that. But also, it's a huge country? As someone who sort of, kind of, wondered if I was good enough to play for the team itself someday--you wouldn't have caught me dead saying it out loud, but inside my head, you can't stop wondering--I didn't want to be stuck with a zillion crazy people jumping up and down until I can't hear myself think. Some people do! Gretchen [Hargrave] and some others, they went out to one of those huge screens and had a blast. But yeah, just because I don't need that kind of energy doesn't make me any less Namirite.

I think technically we had a final paper due the next day and of course the professor postponed it. She made up some terrible excuse too, like, 'there's been some concerns about plagiarism or machine-generated text, please take your time and create something thoughtful and truly original'--okay, come on, you know we're all sleep-deprived and losing our minds about football because you are too, just don't try and hide it.

Actually I had made a bracket, several of us had, and there's always this level of 'do you bet on Zwangzug because you're gonna be rooting for them anyway or do you hedge'? And I think I wound up predicting like...Tumbra or someone, I don't know. The point is the bracket was busted way before the final, so I had no conflict of interest, just cheering like a crazy person. In the end of course Ernie [Stakhanov] won because he was the only one willing to be like 'I can't ever root against Zwangzug' so he's probably never gonna let us live that down.

Nor should he. I mean, I wasn't even on that team and I'm getting questions about it, right? Let people talk.

by **Pemecutan** » Thu Jan 26, 2023 12:21 am

Wraspati Paing Wuku Medangsia, Pawukon 1784

It's Reversing

Tegeh Kori - Pemecutan men's national football team starting the XV Eagle's Cup in a rather bumpy ride. Losing their first two matches have been seen as a nightmare. These results placed the country in the last place of their group. Pramana, the manager, quickly change the strategy and the formation. They are back to one of Pramana's favorite form, 4-4-2. The form is somehow success to reverse the luck of the country. Their latest match against Independent Athletes of Quebec is their third consecutive win. These results finally placed them in the second place below Quebec and above Græntfjall although with a very thight point.

Despite the consecutive winning, negative comments are still circulating around. They accused that the home vibe that give a better atmosphere to the players so they can win. Another comments said that the players were more confidence because they are playing at home. These comments highlighted the fact that the team's consecutive winning were all won at home. But how about the last match? The match against Electrum will be the crucial one. As we can see, Pemecutan is only better in goal difference against Græntfjall in the leaderboard. And a slight mistakes can make them exit earlier from the competition.

In their first meeting, Pemecutan was only able to score 1 goal against Electrum in home soil. And now, they will be playing as a guest to Electrum. That is a double pressure. Although it's worth noted that Electrum have never been win in their previous matches in the competition. Their best result was against Independent Athletes of Quebec with a goaless match. So we, the Pemecutan national team, have a better chance to win, right? Right? That's on paper. The manager, Pramana still reminds his players that every matches are important. "Never underestimate you opponent," Pramana's wisdom to his boys. Nevertheless, the faith of Pemecutan campaign in the competition is lay on this match.

World Cup 81/82/83/84

BPNT have last chance to join final Eagles Club quartet
Scott McCrae
The Daily Mail Chief Soccer Writer

Following the three match homestand in Endborough, the Commonwealth National Team will make a final away trip in Eagles Cup 15 to face Turori on the final matchday of the Cocoa-bo Challenge Trophy with all to play for.

Clean sheet victories over Banija and Nephara have moved BP into a position to advance from the Eagles Club Group with a win over the Eels at the Almintora National Stadium and a draw between the Banijans and Nepharim; all other permutations will see the Bees at a disadvantage on tie breakers and eliminated.

The hosts are in fine form having already secured passage to the last eight of the tournament but will face a far different team than the one that allowed five goals at Rogers Stadium; the defense regrouped after the match that Hailey Reinhart-Zavaros called “an outlier”, reducing the number of scoring chances and shots from both opponents considerably compared to the away fixtures in Dodoma and Brinemouth.

The general gameplan is not expected to change from the previous five EC contests to date, as the Bees will look to control the ball in short triangles and advance forward with small gains in territorial possession; Reinhart-Zavaros has indicated throughout the tournament that there are specific goals relative to the P4 metric and how much variation there is over the course of 90 minutes.
(* P4 is the measure of “tempo” that the national team plays at during a match; it is the number of Passes Per minute of Possession in Play—understood to be passes attempted—with an average baseline around 30-32. Higher means faster, lower is slower.)
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Soup's On!

The Commonwealth of Baker Park is a modern, prosperous, and highly developed nation, with one of the highest adult literacy rates, highest per capita income rates, and highest measures of overall health of the population in the multiverse.

Like all people (and other species & sentient beings, all things being equal), Parkers like to eat, and are fortunate to live in a nation where the quality and availability of fresh, naturally produced food is considered something beyond the need for discussion or debate.

Two of every three citizens in Baker Park claim English, Scottish, Irish, or German ancestry from one side of their family; over the first 75 years of its history cuisine in the Commonwealth meant meat, potatoes & vegetables, and bread without much innovation or imagination.

Second and third wave immigration, along with a broadening knowledge about other nations and regions meant that food culture finally started to develop in the 1970's and 80's beyond traditional “fine dining” based on French cooking & technique.

But even simple family meals and old country recipes benefited from the consistency of readily available fresh--and cheap--staples across the entire spectrum of nutritional requirements. The relative compactness of the country means that the time any product moves from field through processing to market is short, and there is little incentive for supply to move far ahead of demand.

People here eat food that goes through less post-harvest processing than in most developed nations; the example of grain based products is possibly the most instructive: the breakdown of harvested wheat sees about 63% sent on to become white flour, with the remaining 37% utilized as whole or cracked wheat (22%) and wheat berries (15%); corn grown for consumption (sweet corn/white corn) is broken down in season to 73% retail/27% canned or frozen and out of season to 61% canned or frozen/30% dried/9% silage; rye is used at a ratio of 76% flour and cracked or whole/24% rye berries.

Lunch is generally regarded as the most important meal of the day and soup is a centerpiece of the midday repast, usually accompanied by a half sandwich or one of BP's famous pepperoni (or sausage) rolls; there are a lot of heavy & hearty soups and stews that are considered 'family' dishes, but just as many simple, universally widespread recipes that you could find at any luncheonette, small restaurant. or company cafeteria throughout the nation.

Squash Soup: the inner flesh of a roasted butternut squash, with leeks and garlic sweated in butter, combined in a food processor with some vegetable stock or water and spices. There is no one that does not love it.

Green Pea Soup: Baker Park produces over 1,100 metric tons of unshelled green peas, with approximately 18% of that total solely for the use of the Naval Service of the Commonwealth annually (along with the Commonwealth Army); onions & celery are added to fresh shelled peas with vegetable stock or water and pureed to make a thick green soup.

Noodle Soup: Concentrated chicken stock and egg noodles are the sole ingredients of this soup that is traditionally served as part of the pre-match meal for the Baker Park National Soccer Team along with being a regular offering on luncheon menus, sometimes with additional vegetables added.

Beef & Barley Soup: There are as many local variations of this as there are localities, but the basic formula of slow cooked cheap cuts of beef (or sometimes pork) combined with whole barley and traditionally mushrooms is popular across the country.

Bean Soup: Dried white beans (or sometimes black beans) are soaked and cooked with onions, celery, potatoes and a ham hock or shank (or a beef or lamb shank).

Jumble Soup: Barley is substituted for rice in this take on jambalaya (and increasingly orzo or couscous are being used) with sliced sausage and/or chicken or uncured ham that traditionally had a base of leeks, green bell peppers and red cabbage, with peeled and seeded tomatoes another recent adaptation.

Dumpling Soup: The stock used is generally the only variation in this version of matzo ball soup, which features a flour dumpling in beef, chicken or vegetable broth.

Sandwiches that are served with these soups generally are basic, and vary from day to day at places that do high volume lunch service: toasted bread with 2 items that can be a slice of meat with cheese; bacon and tomato (no lettuce); a mixed chicken or seafood salad spread; or a marinated mixed vegetable combo that usually would be served on a thicker type of bread or bun.

lineup vs Turori

McCormack; Frost, Edmonds, Schulman; Park, Garfield, McFairlaine, Reynolds; A Knight; Craig (C), Khan

The Eagle's Cup XV :: Cup of Champions 16 :: RP/Scores

Turorian Acronym Overview

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