Campionato Esportiva 34 & Sport. Fest. 2 - Everything Thread

by **South Newlandia** » Sun Dec 18, 2022 1:20 pm

Permissions: Please don’t (irreparably) hurt my players or my feelings
Style Mods: 0 for all where it applies

Sorry for most of these rosters being kinda very bad, feel free to just make up stuff about play styles/good players and so on, especially on the Field Hockey, Handball, and Sevens

by **Har Yarok** » Sun Dec 18, 2022 1:53 pm

Nation name: Ha’Yarok
Trigram: HYK
Demonym/adjective: Ha’Yaroki

Permissions:
Y…

Except for:
No RL photographs, no violence

Teams
Football
Baseball
Basketball
Handball

Football

Nickname: Green & Blues

All players play for domestic teams unless otherwise stated, and are available for transfer as free agents. They are not listed on the TW but you can freely add them. They will play at any level -- third division of a non-RPed league is a perfectly appropriate landing spot for most of these. New players are in italics.

Staff

Coach: Yehudi Ganani (60)
Assistant coach: Ioan Yoffey (45)

Goalkeepers

1. Javan Ran (27) Shemiha LeZion
12. Joey Goldschmidt (25) Sabit Netuel
23. Joen Mattuck (30)

Mosfellsður

Defenders

2. Dominik Dusl (27) Hapoel She’ed Afeba
3. Jeremias Grossman (26)

SV Großbach-Zierenräschen
4. Aksel Latchman (25) Hapoel Tibeth
5. Gabai Friedlander (20)

HŠK Gorntoki
6. Orin Lachman (29) Maccabi Bnei Lodibe
13. Jannes Dukes (31) Shemiha LeZion
14. Johnathan Poupko (22)

Mlima Kijani Revenue and Excise Division SC
20. Imanol Bakstansky (20) Maccabi Yamera
25. Yigil Hartog (25) Hapoel She’ed Afeba
26. Jocheved Hyamson (18) Maccabi Bnei Lodibe

Midfielders

7. Jorah Alter (29) Shemiha LeZion
8. Davin Eisen (24) Hapoel She’ed Afeba
10. Daniel Bayme (32) Maccabi Bnei Lodibe
11. Jacob Shoshan (29) Bialer
15. Caleb Sutro (23) Maccabi Yamera
16. Serafim Samuels (29) Hapoel She’ed Afeba
17. Zachary Sherman (31)

Zweiburger FC
18. Jaydon Kosmin (24) Hapoel She’ed Afeba
22. Aldo Breytenbach (28) Sabit Netuel

Forwards

9. Smuel Kahn (31)

Shkotan FC - CAPTAIN
19. Avidor Speyer (25) Hapoel Or Haifiel
21. Chaviv Sarlin (31) Hapoel She’ed Afeba
24. Reuban Lichtman (26) Shemiha LeZion

Style modifier: 0

Baseball

Nickname: Silver Stars
Colours: Blue uniforms, green caps

You can RP my rotation, lineup, and player stats as you like. If you want more specific details send me a message and I'll get back to you. New players are in italics.

Pitchers

Jael Ballin
Henry Green
Jordi Frankfurter
Efron Merton
Zachely Ascher
Arie Stiebel
Matai Fiedler
Efron Grois
Uriel Ben-Shahar
Sinai Blum
Avner Sylvester
Zohar Mohilewer

Catchers

Zane Gestetner
Mikel Erlich

Infielders

Arlin Einhorn
Azriel Aronsfeld
Tzefanyah Herzl
Shane Spitzer
Yeruchum Hirst

Outfielders

Frederick Duchen
Heber Haber
Binyamin Zeiman
Noah Ganani
Ashton Herring

Basketball

Nickname: Raptors
Colours: Green and blue

New players are in italics.

PG Don Somper
PG/SG Obediah Krickstein
SG Asher Goff
SG Amram Ascher
SG Zalman Margolin
SG/SF Ezekiel Kuttab
SF Machau Grossman
SF/PF Jukka Abrams
PF Kobe Rocker
PF Dalit Danielovitch
PF/C Melchior Mankowitz
C/PF Yonatan Gryn

Handball

Nickname: Blue Horses
Colours: Green and blue

GK Yaremka Mohilewer
GK Meir Reiss
LB Nahum Balsam
LB Elam Beer
CB Yehuda Dienesman
CB Jan Schapiro
RB Mai Paliakov
RB Yeshaya Zangwill
LW Yitzchok Shalit
LW Yehuda Erlich
LW Isaiah Cowen
P Palti Rubin
P Bama Sharot
RW Izreal Kaplan
RW Benson Mazar

by **Hannasea** » Sun Dec 18, 2022 2:24 pm

Nation name: The Hannasean Federation
Trigram: HAN
Adjective/demonym: Hannasean

Permissions

No photos, no violence, go nuts.

Teams
Football
Baseball
Basketball
Field hockey
Handball

Football

Nickname: Black Butterflies

Soccer (known as hateball in Hannasea because of how much we hate it) is an all-female sport. It is not played at a high level and players are a step below full international level; the national team has won three games in their history and somehow fumbled their way to the knockouts in CE32 in what was widely assumed to be a work of performance art. The team is not very physically strong but have been working to improve fitness and reduce sloppy errors. New players are in italics.

Coach: Kate Grant
Kate has been the successful manager of Pearl City Rovers in the Federation Hateball League and hopes to bring bold technical innovations trialled there such as a 4-3-3 formation, emphasis on quick passing, and not losing every single game, to the national team job.

Squad

GK Natasha Green

Dynamo
Captain. Goalkeeper Natasha isn't the tallest (Hannasean women are notoriously short) but she has good reflexes and is quite skilled with the ball at her feet. Will her ability in possession make up for her aerial deficits? Spoiler: no. She is now the captain. Reserves: Jessie Cameron, Georgia Walker.

LB Gianna Espinoza

Olympic Mayswick
Both Gianna and Karissa are new call-ups, replacing veterans Rachel Barrett and Lexi Holmes. Gianna is the better technician of the two, an elegant wing-back; Karissa is a bit scrappier and more willing to throw in the needed tackle. Reserve: Karissa James.

CB Karina Wilkinson

Star of Confederation
The tough tackling Karina has a high work rate and will give everything for the team at both ends. She’s not especially big for a center back and makes up for it with a bit of tactical roughness. She was captain at the last CE but has abandoned the armband after their disappointing peformance. Reserves: Keira Murray, Maddison Dry, Freya Johnson, Natasha Price.

CB Victoria Pearce

Springriden
Victoria is the biggest player on the team, unusually tall for a Hannasean woman and possessing a stocky build. Perhaps she has a little Brenecian in her. She's not exceptional on the ball but she's the physical lynchpin of the defence.

RB Meaghan Earls

Esna
Brittany Horton was the first Hannasean player to ever sign overseas, but her age has robbed her of some of her pace and so Meaghan will get a chance to start. She's fast and can cross the ball powerfully, but not exceptionally tough on defence. Reserve: Brittany Horton.

HM Chelsea Crawford

Barossia United
Chelsea is a busy playmaker who anchors the midfield in the new system. She's a little undersized to be providing much defensive cover but she's very good on the ball, and quite tough. Reserve: Hayley Dines.

LCM Katie Thomas

Olympic Mayswick
Katie is, by Hannasean standards, a good all-round midfielder who plays in a central role for Olympic but will fill in the most versatile, box-to-box role of the three central midfielders in this formation, breaking up plays with tackling and distributing the ball forward. As one of the tallest players on a very short team, a perennial target at set pieces. Reserve: Amara Wallace.

RCM Annabella Rose

Hillsmouth
An intelligent playmaker who has to take on the role Maya Davidson once held of stringing the attacks together, Annabella is fast and has a good quality shot, but none of her forebear's abilities from set pieces. Reserve: Lily-Mae Murray.

LW Mikayla Ross

Pearl Angelwood Wanderers
Mikayla is an intelligent passer and has good football IQ but is quite small and can get bullied off the ball. Breakaway pace but not so good at turning at speed. Her backup, Aisha, is the first black Black Butterfly. Reserve: Aisha Connell.

RW Emma Terrell

Springriden
A determined and intelligent player, albeit one without the kind of pace needed to regularly beat defenders. Very accurate at passing and crossing. Never shirks from a tackle despite her mousy physique. Would run through a wall for her teammates. Reserve: Sarah Williamson.

ST Remi Gray

Butterfly City
Short for a striker (yes, we get it already). She has great ball control and can withstand the physical side a bit better than some of her teammates. She's an excellent finisher. But she's young and untested, and this is her first time taking on Esportiva's biggest powers. Reserves: Anya Edwards, Brooke Read, Mackenzie Gray.

Style modifier: 0

Team nickname: Choughs

Coaching staff

Manager: John Davidson
Assistant Manager: Harvey Johnson
Deputy Manager: David Harvey
Assistant Deputy Manager: David John Harvey
Assistant Deputy Assistant Manager: John Harvey Davidson
Deputy Assistant Deputy Assistant Manager: John Samuel Harvey-Davidson
Deputy Assistant Deputy Assistant Deputy Manager: David Harvey Samuel Johnson-Williams
Assistant Deputy Assistant Deputy Assistant Deputy Manager: William Peter David Harvey-Johnson-Samuels
Deputy Assistant Deputy Assistant Deputy Assistant Deputy Manager: John Samuel William Harvey David Peter Brontosaurus Ezekiel Whiskey Tango Foxtrot Ulanbatur air horn noise Hugh Chestnut Orion Gladiator slaps knee Walnut Horatio Pythagoras Alabaster Not-Samantha armpit farting noise Unclefucker Quasimodo Pomegranate Nylon Suspenders oh I do like to be beside the seaside, I do like to be beside the sea Neil Gormenghast Sygyzy Truffles doorbell sound Pusilanimous Hector Egburt Hardrada that don't impress-a-me much BOW BOW BOW BOW BOW BOW BOW Hillary Telegraphpole Subway Collection Spanner creak of coffin door opening Johnson-Williamson-Johnson, Jr.
Assistant to the Manager: John

Starting rotation
1. Will Matthews (S/R)
Four-seam fastball (96-98 mph), slider, two-seam fastball, changeup. Pure power pitcher.
2. Jay Gould (L/L)
Four-seam fastball (96-98 mph), changeup, forkball, knuckle curve. Savage power pitcher, radar all over the place.
3. Noah Harris (R/R)
Four-seam fastball (95-97mph), curveball, two-seam fastball, knuckle curve. Groundball pitcher with good stuff and control.
4. Toby Parry (R/R)
Four-seam fastball (96-98mph), two-seam fastball, curveball, changeup. Mainly a power pitcher.
5. Zac Parker (R/R)
Sinking fastball (94-96mph), two-seam fastball, curveball, changeup, forkball. Groundball pitcher with good control and a decent hitter.

Arm barn

Listed in ascending order of leverage. Right handed unless otherwise stated.

Luke Morris (long relief/spot starter)
Jack Gibson (L)
Daniel Hawkins
William Whitworth
Kody Terrell (L)
Ryan Young
Chase Allen (L)
Benjamin Palmer
Tom DiVicenzo

Default lineup

RF Ethan Harman
A genuine power-hitter, but bats leadoff for the NT owing to speed on the basepaths. Excellent fielder.
LF Jason Mathis
The team's best power-hitter, a TTO machine with a cannon arm.
C Zach Walker
A pretty average defensive catcher. Excellent eye at the plate, leading to many "Walker walks" puns, but not a major power threat.
3B Aaron Green
The team's best all-round hitter, incredible HR-to-SO numbers but hits into a lot of double plays as a result. Aggressive fielder capable of brilliance and infuriating brain-fades in equal measure.
DH Sam Pearce
Switch hitter with good power and speed. Plays 3B/SS/LF but not an outstanding defender.
1B Jesse Lowe
Pure power hitter, doesn't walk enough for the high strikeout rate he accrues. Slow on the basepaths and looms like a henge at 1st.
SS Joe Mills
Light hitter, quick on the basepaths. Good footwork means he's underrated defensively as he rarely needs to make the flashy play, but doesn't have a strong arm.
2B Jay Wagner
Slap hitter who mainly deals in singles. A good defender who's not afraid to dive around and put his body on the line.
CF Jake Walsh
Basically a second leadoff hitter: walks, steals, and the odd bit of power. Nice range in center, shame about the arm.

With no DH, pitcher bats #8. Mathis and Green will swap with Pearce at DH for the odd game to help load manage. Against a left-handed starter, Chase Lee plays 1B.

Reserves

C/1B Dominik Fox
1B/3B Bryan Taylor
2B/SS Alex Hamilton
1B/LF Chase Lee
CF/RF Connor Baker

The HBA hasn’t really taken on the analytics revolution in the way the HBL has. Players are more likely to take low percentage 2PT jumpers than might be common in other leagues. Flashy play – big dunks, hero ball – is popular regardless of what the percentages say. Defence can be pretty fierce or utterly lackadaisical, never in-between.

Coach: Markus Volgelstein, former coach of Richardson University in Ranoria, had the mixed blessings of being Hannasea's first international coach and inheriting a defend world champion side. Though he was unable to defend that title, reaching the final was deemed a good enough performance, and he put away any doubts about his job by leading the team to Olympic gold a year alater.

Roster

5. Késhaun Cunningham (PG, 6’4”, Greenville United)
With nice handles for a player of his size, Cunningham is a left-handed point guard who can be difficult for the opposition to defend. He’s a great passer but struggles to impact the game on defence and can be turnover prone.
13. Ra’eed Coleman (PG, 6’1”, Liberty Sabretooths)
Coleman is a pure chucker whose aggressive three point shooting can turn the game in either team’s favour depending on whether his shot is landing or not. Speedy and grabs steals but not a great man defender and his tricky passes end up in the stands as often as in the hands of the guy rolling to the basket.

11. Parker Collins (SG, 6’6”, Marble Hills Pirates)
Energetic five-tool player whose shooting blew a little hot and cold at the Olympics, though he did make some clutch corner threes. Can defend 1 – 4 and pull down some rebounds.
7. Nathaniel Rubin (SG/SF, 6’7”, Butterfly City Crazy Hippos)
Part of the Olympic team, Rubin is a rangy outside shooter with a slightly unconventional release that can lead to him getting blocked, but when he gets free, he’s above average in accuracy. A quiet undemanding guy who doesn’t mind putting in effort on defense or going without the ball for stretches.
4. Wyatt May (SG/PG, 6’2”, Coral Coast Dolphins)
Somewhat surprising owner of the HBA single game scoring record, but in general May doesn't hit his shots at a high enough percentage to make up for the fact that he doesn't really offer anything else.

9. Tom Powell (SF/SG/PG, 6’7”, Oak Park Blue Bees)
A popular, flashy wing whose 3PT shot is extremely streaky, middling career average but with some clutch moments to his name, particularly on defence. He’s been the face of the Hannasean team in international play to date. Listed as a SF in the past but playing as a point forward; Off the court, his relationship with the leader of a far-right party continues to attract negative attention for someone who is otherwise seen as having blazed a trail for Hannasean athletes of colour.
10. Nate Connell (SF, 6’8”, Chelcaste Force
Another Olympic carryover, Connell’s scoring wasn’t a major factor in the gold medal run, but his scrappy defense and hustling full-court energy were important contributing factors in the Sardines’ success.
6. Jacaubré Howard (SF, 6’8”, Hillmouth Buxx)
An athletic and versatile wing who offers a bit of everything, but not a number one offensive threat for the Buxx. Happier hitting the boards or picking up tough defensive assignments than being a main scoring option, and can pass well enough to keep the heat off his iffy three-point shot.

8. Jean-Luc Kaplan (PF, 6’10”, Upper Niedewe Jackals)
A young prospect who's already holding down a 20/10 average and throwing in better than a block a game. Like most Hannasean PFs Kaplan isn't a true stretch four, but he has a decent midrange shot and seems to be working on developing as an outside threat.
12. TreQuell Whitaker (PF/SF, 6’10”, New Blopping Shade)
Whitaker’s defense was superb at the Olympics and has earned him an IBC berth. He’s not much of a factor on offense outside of dunks and putbacks, but his board crashing energy and huge vertical combined with impressive strength make up for not having the longerst arms. Not great from the line, but has improved to make ‘hit-a-Whitaker’ tactics risky.

14. Justin Griffin (C, 6’11”, Hillmouth Buxx)
A dominant scorer and rebounder at domestic level, Griffin found IBC play a step up and will look to improve on his showing on home floors. A classic center with no real outside game, but no weaknesses in the paint, either.
15. Blake Hopkins (C/PF, 7’2”, Oak Park Blue Bees)
Hopkins was the breakout star of the Olympic team as a primary scoring option, so adapting to minutes off the bench – he’s behind Griffin on the depth chart thanks to the latter’s superior defense – will be a challenge. A bit more able to stretch the floor than Griffin but nowhere near as athletic and fitness can be a concern late in the game.

Uniforms

The Sardines will play in black kit with gold piping, and wear the shorts and socks of their individual HBA franchises.

Team nickname: Black Sticks

Coach: A nice big one with air conditioning :)

Roster (customary starters/most minutes in bold)

2. Addison Stewart (GK) (Oak Park Broncos)
17. Evie Phillips (GK) (Coral Coast Swans)
With her flying stick saves and aggressiveness at chasing down attackers twice her size, Addison Stewart was considered the MVP of the Black Sticks 5 years ago and the hands-down best goalkeeper in the FHL. Since then her powers appear to have dulled a little, but she remains pretty reliable and won’t make too many unforced errors, even if she’s more goal-bound than before.

16. Kassy Abraham (LB) (Butterfly City Robots)
10. Jade Elliott (CB) (Greenfield Monkeys)
3. Mia Harris (RB) (Greenville Arsenal)
6. Sofia Weaver (Coral Coast Swans)
4. Sarah Tanner (Angelwood Snakes)
At the heart of the Black Sticks’ defence is Jade Elliott, who has the size to cover opposing centre forwards, offer lockdown defence, and then release quick breaks with long accurate passes and throws. Whether this will transfer when playing against mixed or men’s teams however remains to be seen. Mia Harris is a very capable defender who can press high and Kassy Abraham the team’s second option at penalty corners.

15. Jasmine Dawson (CH) (Marble Hills Hornets)
Team captain Dawson plays as a forward-pressing centre back who can run high with the midfield or pull back and sweep up; she was the key to their attacking 3-1-3-3 set-up and is looking to play a similar role in the 3-1-4-2 look they now favour. She doesn’t just have a big motor, also possessing excellent vision and passing.

7. Vanessa Aguirre (LM) (Coral Coast Swans)
8. Holly George (CM) (Greenfield Monkeys)
18. Bethany Cook (CM) (Greenfield Monkeys)
12. Erin Campbell (RM) (Silver Creek HSC)
13. Amara Knight (Silver Mountain Ravens)
14. Leila Bronson (Oak Park Broncos)
Not part of the Olympic side, Bethany Cook is a dynamic midfielder coming off a couple seasons’ worth of injuries. She plays alongside her domestic teammate and Olympic MVP Holly George, a super small, super fast, super super skilled ball of energy. Vanessa Aguirre is mostly famous as the team’s PC specialist; she’s also got a lethal tomahawk. Erin Campbell is fast and skilled but can let her ambition get the best of her.

5. Chloe Ross (FW) (Greenfield Monkeys)
11. Emilia Tanner (FW) (Greenfield Monkeys)
1. Maya Cox (Coral Coast Swans)
9. Danielle Robertson (Deer River HSC)
Is it any surprise the Monkeys are the best team in the FHL? Ross led the scoring at the Olympics. It may be an unglamorous set-up, but her ‘Ross Sweep’ is faultless in turning in the many crosses sent her way. Tanner is an absolute livewire on either swing, her favoured tactic being a hard run to the baseline and sharp pull-back into traffic.

Style modifier: +5

Nickname: Hannasea national handball team

GK Arthur Murphy
GK Danny Hill
LB George Shaw
LB Justin Otto
CB Euan Graham
CB Kian May
RB Mason Armstrong
RB Nathan Ronin
RB Teddie Burke
LW Ethan Taylor
LW Albie Marsh
P Caleb Richardson
P Eduard Price
RW Richard Sims
RW Nate Marsh

by **South Newlandia** » Sun Dec 18, 2022 2:40 pm

Here's your first (only slightly belated) cutoff for all the stuff!

If you notice any mistakes, please alert me ASAP!

Campionato Esportiva 34

Group A
Ha'Yarok 1–1 Le Choix
Kalush 0–2 South Newlandia
Acadiana 2–3 Natanians and Nosts

P Group A                               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 South Newlandia                         1   1  0  0    2   0  +2    3
2 Natanians and Nosts                     1   1  0  0    3   2  +1    3
3 Ha'Yarok                                1   0  1  0    1   1   0    1
  Le Choix                                1   0  1  0    1   1   0    1
5 Acadiana                                1   0  0  1    2   3  −1    0
6 Kalush                                  1   0  0  1    0   2  −2    0

Group B
Ceyne Isles 1–0 The Licentian Isles
The Five United Clans 1–1 Katterimunk
The Hannasean Federation 4–3 Ummat al-Haqiqa

P Group B                               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Ceyne Isles                             1   1  0  0    1   0  +1    3
  The Hannasean Federation                1   1  0  0    4   3  +1    3
3 Katterimunk                             1   0  1  0    1   1   0    1
  The Five United Clans                   1   0  1  0    1   1   0    1
5 The Licentian Isles                     1   0  0  1    0   1  −1    0
  Ummat al-Haqiqa                         1   0  0  1    3   4  −1    0

Group C
Dod Rava 3–2 Drehda
Esportivan Darmen 2–0 Fhulghamous Peninsula
Neomaris 0–3 Brenecia

P Group C                               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Brenecia                                1   1  0  0    3   0  +3    3
2 Esportivan Darmen                       1   1  0  0    2   0  +2    3
3 Dod Rava                                1   1  0  0    3   2  +1    3
4 Drehda                                  1   0  0  1    2   3  −1    0
5 Fhulghamous Peninsula                   1   0  0  1    0   2  −2    0
6 Neomaris                                1   0  0  1    0   3  −3    0

Group D
Sylestone 0–2 Tumbra
Racing 0–1 Macbon
Boring Paradise 4–4 Gouvanarch

P Group D                               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Tumbra                                  1   1  0  0    2   0  +2    3
2 Macbon                                  1   1  0  0    1   0  +1    3
3 Boring Paradise                         1   0  1  0    4   4   0    1
  Gouvanarch                              1   0  1  0    4   4   0    1
5 Racing                                  1   0  0  1    0   1  −1    0
6 Sylestone                               1   0  0  1    0   2  −2    0

Group E
Lozho 3–3 Vielfaltig
Ancherion 3–2 Cheetahs and reptiles Coalison
Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva 1–2 Xanneria

P Group E                               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Ancherion                               1   1  0  0    3   2  +1    3
  Xanneria                                1   1  0  0    2   1  +1    3
3 Lozho                                   1   0  1  0    3   3   0    1
  Vielfaltig                              1   0  1  0    3   3   0    1
5 Cheetahs and reptiles Coalison          1   0  0  1    2   3  −1    0
  Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva   1   0  0  1    1   2  −1    0

Group F
The Shambia 1–1 Robostania
Cap Nord 2–0 Kings Park
Bongo Johnson 1–0 Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom

P Group F                               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Cap Nord                                1   1  0  0    2   0  +2    3
2 Bongo Johnson                           1   1  0  0    1   0  +1    3
3 Robostania                              1   0  1  0    1   1   0    1
  The Shambia                             1   0  1  0    1   1   0    1
5 Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom               1   0  0  1    0   1  −1    0
6 Kings Park                              1   0  0  1    0   2  −2    0

Esportivan Baseball Trophy II

Group A
Natanians and Nosts                        0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0  0
Ha'Yarok                                   0 1 0 1 0 0 0 0 X  2

The Hannasean Federation                   0 4 0 0 0 2 0 1 0  7
Esportivan Darmen                          0 0 0 0 0 1 0 3 0  4

South Newlandia                            0 0 0 0 0 6 5 0 1 12
Tumbra                                     0 0 1 0 0 0 0 2 0  3

P Group A                                  Pld   W  L   RF  RA  RD    Win % 
1 South Newlandia                            1   1  0   12   3  +9    1.000
2 The Hannasean Federation                   1   1  0    7   4  +3    1.000
3 Ha'Yarok                                   1   1  0    2   0  +2    1.000
4 Natanians and Nosts                        1   0  1    0   2  −2    0.000
5 Esportivan Darmen                          1   0  1    4   7  −3    0.000
6 Tumbra                                     1   0  1    3  12  −9    0.000

Group B
Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva      0 2 1 1 0 1 1 0 0  6
Super-Llamaland                            0 1 0 0 0 0 1 1 0  3

Le Choix                                   4 0 0 1 1 0 0 0 0  6
Kalush                                     1 0 0 1 2 1 0 0 0  5

Fhulghamous Peninsula                      1 0 0 1 1 0 0 1 2  6
The Licentian Isles                        0 0 0 0 2 2 0 0 0  4

P Group B                                  Pld   W  L   RF  RA  RD    Win % 
1 Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva      1   1  0    6   3  +3    1.000
2 Fhulghamous Peninsula                      1   1  0    6   4  +2    1.000
3 Le Choix                                   1   1  0    6   5  +1    1.000
4 Kalush                                     1   0  1    5   6  −1    0.000
5 The Licentian Isles                        1   0  1    4   6  −2    0.000
6 Super-Llamaland                            1   0  1    3   6  −3    0.000

Esportivan Basketball Trophy II

Group A
Kalush 70–100 Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva
South Newlandia 86–73 Fhulghamous Peninsula
The Licentian Isles 81–83 Neomaris

P Group A                                  Pld   W  L   PF  PA  PD    Win % 
1 Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva      1   1  0  100  70 +30    1.000
2 South Newlandia                            1   1  0   86  73 +13    1.000
3 Neomaris                                   1   1  0   83  81  +2    1.000
4 The Licentian Isles                        1   0  1   81  83  −2    0.000
5 Fhulghamous Peninsula                      1   0  1   73  86 −13    0.000
6 Kalush                                     1   0  1   70 100 −30    0.000

Group B
The Hannasean Federation 114–73 Natanians and Nosts
Katterimunk 70–80 Robostania
Ha'Yarok 71–70 Esportivan Darmen

P Group B                                  Pld   W  L   PF  PA  PD    Win % 
1 The Hannasean Federation                   1   1  0  114  73 +41    1.000
2 Robostania                                 1   1  0   80  70 +10    1.000
3 Ha'Yarok                                   1   1  0   71  70  +1    1.000
4 Esportivan Darmen                          1   0  1   70  71  −1    0.000
5 Katterimunk                                1   0  1   70  80 −10    0.000
6 Natanians and Nosts                        1   0  1   73 114 −41    0.000

Esportivan Field Hockey Trophy

Group A
Sylestone 2–0 South Newlandia
Natanians and Nosts 2–0 Tumbra
Le Choix 0–3 Lozho

P Group A                               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Lozho                                   1   1  0  0    3   0  +3    3
2 Natanians and Nosts                     1   1  0  0    2   0  +2    3
  Sylestone                               1   1  0  0    2   0  +2    3
4 South Newlandia                         1   0  0  1    0   2  −2    0
  Tumbra                                  1   0  0  1    0   2  −2    0
6 Le Choix                                1   0  0  1    0   3  −3    0

Group B
Kings Park 4–3 The Licentian Isles
Katterimunk 6–2 Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva
Neomaris 3–6 The Hannasean Federation

P Group B                               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Katterimunk                             1   1  0  0    6   2  +4    3
2 The Hannasean Federation                1   1  0  0    6   3  +3    3
3 Kings Park                              1   1  0  0    4   3  +1    3
4 The Licentian Isles                     1   0  0  1    3   4  −1    0
5 Neomaris                                1   0  0  1    3   6  −3    0
6 Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva   1   0  0  1    2   6  −4    0

Esportivan Handball Trophy

Group A
The Licentian Isles 23–30 Katterimunk
South Newlandia 28–22 The Hannasean Federation
Le Choix 24–27 Sylestone

P Group A                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Katterimunk                   1   1  0  0   30  23  +7    2
2 South Newlandia               1   1  0  0   28  22  +6    2
3 Sylestone                     1   1  0  0   27  24  +3    2
4 Le Choix                      1   0  0  1   24  27  −3    0
5 The Hannasean Federation      1   0  0  1   22  28  −6    0
6 The Licentian Isles           1   0  0  1   23  30  −7    0

Group B
Robostania 24–21 Natanians and Nosts
Ha'Yarok 29–28 The Five United Clans
Cap Nord 23–26 Tumbra

P Group B                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Robostania                    1   1  0  0   24  21  +3    2
  Tumbra                        1   1  0  0   26  23  +3    2
3 Ha'Yarok                      1   1  0  0   29  28  +1    2
4 The Five United Clans         1   0  0  1   28  29  −1    0
5 Cap Nord                      1   0  0  1   23  26  −3    0
  Natanians and Nosts           1   0  0  1   21  24  −3    0

Esportivan Rugby Sevens Trophy

Group A
Fhulghamous Peninsula 0–48 Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva
Le Choix 21–24 The Shambia
South Newlandia 52–0 Natanians and Nosts

P Group A                                  Pld   W  D  L   PF  PA  PD  Pts 
1 South Newlandia                            1   1  0  0   52   0 +52    3
2 Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva      1   1  0  0   48   0 +48    3
3 The Shambia                                1   1  0  0   24  21  +3    3
4 Le Choix                                   1   0  0  1   21  24  −3    1
5 Fhulghamous Peninsula                      1   0  0  1    0  48 −48    1
6 Natanians and Nosts                        1   0  0  1    0  52 −52    1

Group B
Kings Park 12–26 Lozho
The Licentian Isles 24–17 Cap Nord
Esportivan Darmen 49–7 Neomaris

P Group B                                  Pld   W  D  L   PF  PA  PD  Pts 
1 Esportivan Darmen                          1   1  0  0   49   7 +42    3
2 Lozho                                      1   1  0  0   26  12 +14    3
3 The Licentian Isles                        1   1  0  0   24  17  +7    3
4 Cap Nord                                   1   0  0  1   17  24  −7    1
5 Kings Park                                 1   0  0  1   12  26 −14    1
6 Neomaris                                   1   0  0  1    7  49 −42    1

by **Xanneria** » Sun Dec 18, 2022 11:27 pm

A Return to Form?
sourced from http://www.XTRAsports.xan

SOUTH NEWLANDIA - After a very bad, no good, awful World Cup Qualifier that saw the team straight up refuse a Cup of Harmony invite due to the embarrassing performance of the team, the Xannerian national team got off to a great start in the Campianato Esportiva, beating the Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva team 2-1 in the first match of this cycles Campionato Esportiva. A very important game, not only for Xanneria to get the cycle started off right after such rust had likely started to accumulate, but also because Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva was the 9th rated team in Esportiva, just four sports behind Xanneria.

The Game was started under a beautiful South Newlandian sunset. With the game starting at 7:00pm local time. The game started off slow for both teams, as passing just wasn't their for either team. Eventually a first shot was taken at the 15 minute mark by Allison Burnes, but the diminutive Austin City striker kicked the ball right into the waiting arms of Karla Craig. Craig then sent the ball on its way, but a few minutes later she deflected another shot by the Maroons as this time she captured a header from Burns Austin City teammate Anton Vito, the offensive midfielder.

It would take another ten minutes for anything to get going, but Nova got on the board first. Sara Harper made a pass at the far side of the field to Liz Pope who was in the near side corner of the penalty box, Pope looked like she had thought about taking a shot but thought better of it as she passed to Maria Nichols who scored on Hailey Rae Crawford who was returning to the Keeper spot after a cycle away. That goal didn't scare away the Maroons though, they kept fighting and had multiple attempts at goals, but it wouldn't be till after halftime that one successfully went through.

Just before the Hour mark Xanneria scored! A pass from Paul Gessecki to Allison Burns turned into a shot from Burns, but it was deflected back into play be Karla Craig, then into the waiting feet of Yolinda Sequin who shot one by Craig for Xannerias first goal. The second goal was from Burns this time. she took a pass from who else, but Gessecki, and at the near corner of the penalty box launched a missile right by Craig for the game winner. This took place with just over 10 minutes left in the game.

Not all was bad for the NAAZE team, after the game multiple NAAZE players were seen at a local bar and grill for an open mic night where none-other than Xannerian Centerback Colton Boyd-Church was seen performing with an acoustic guitar. Boyd-Church, a native of a small farming town in Sutherland called Humfries, graduated from Upper Plymouth University with a degree in Music recording and plans on releasing a country and western album, soon after the CE tournament is down with.

XANNERIA -2
Sequin 58'
Burns 79'

NAAZE - 1
Nichols 32'

by **Sylestone** » Mon Dec 19, 2022 4:35 am

Sylestone (4-4-1-1 → 4-2-3-1): Brick Wall; Holt (Ironing Board 75’) - Mornington ( 89’) - Hand Sanitiser - Toilet; Stanton (Henling 61’) - Blair (Rodway 86’) - Brown - Jones ( 53’); Fleetwood (Keyes 61’); Hightower

Tumbra (4-2-3-1): Brennan ( 87’); Willoughby - Proudfoot - Kerr - Mercurio (Larkin 68’); Harrison - Maguire (Hicks 80’); McDermott (Haines 68’) - Coleman - Hardaker ( 73’) (Baker 90+2’); Henshaw (Deighton 80’)

“Oh cheer up, you lot.” Mojmir Anac had just entered the Sylestonean dressing room following their exceptionally respectable 2-0 loss to Tumbra, only to be met with deafening silence. “They’re the defending champions, the best team in Esportiva. To stop that from blowing out while also creating decent chances ourselves really goes to show how hard we fought. Sure, we may be bottom after the rest of today’s results, but if we can continue to perform like that, it will not remain that way for much longer.” Faces began to rise from beneath their respective jerseys as the players began to take in their coach’s words. “Like all games, there are still things to work on. But when we watch that game back - and yes, we will - you will notice that there are far more positives than negatives and that it’s our best performance yet.”

Anac wasn’t lying when he said that. Sure, a 2-0 defeat indicates that your team was dominated and despite boasting 59% possession, that was true, the Sentients still had their fair share of chances. The only way the Black Eagles could put the ball past the Brick Wall was from a devastating counter just before the half hour mark, while a last gasp tackle from Hugo Mornington in the match’s dying minutes saw the Hesham-based defender given a warning, before club teammate and substitute striker Gerard Deighton capped off his debut by slotting home the resulting penalty. It was a bit of a ridiculous tackle from the centre back, but when you’re 1-0 down with only mere minutes to play, sometimes sheer emotion and frustration can get to you. A centre back himself, Anac knew that the last person to forgive him would be the one guilty of committing the tackle. “Hugo, I know you’re kicking yourself over that foul but as a centre back myself, I’ve made my share of mistakes at costly moments, some even worse than what you committed today. I can guarantee you that no one here, myself included, thinks any less of you for a one-off thing in the heat of the moment and that if you look back and learn from it, you’ll only come out a better footballer. Same goes for you, Alyssa [Hightower]. I can see you - you’re kicking yourself just as hard as Hugo over here for missing that one-on-one with their keeper. But these things happen, and if you do not let it affect you, you will come back from it.

“All of you played your hearts out today, the best I’ve seen each of you play, both as individuals and as a team. The work between you, Hugo and you, Hand Sanitiser, was simply sensational - you saw just as well as I that their forward was becoming more and more frustrated with you two as the game went on. Remember, these guys are world class and many were expecting them to run through us. To frustrate many of their players - for Henshaw wasn’t their only player who showed annoyance - is simply a testament to the quality each and every one of you played with on the field.

“We had the early game today, so I’ll let all of you cool off this afternoon and we’ll rewatch the match tonight and see what we can pick up ourselves before our analysts publish their reports.”

* * *

Later that evening, after the squad had regrouped to analyse the match themselves - something many of them enjoyed doing in their spare time if the result wasn’t too disappointing - Alyssa Hightower walked away feeling noticeably better, knowing that there ultimately wasn’t much she could’ve done to evade Raphael Brennan and equalise even if she’d had the time to consider her options, let alone in the heat of the moment. Considering it had been on her mind all afternoon, she could not help but feel relieved that she’d been able to watch it over and complete processing it. As a result, she found exhaustion heave its weight upon her as she collapsed into her bed, barely noticing that her roommates Eden Holt and Sophia Pearson were yet to return. Having played the full ninety for the first time in a Sylestonean jersey - she’d done it many times before for Capitol Athletic and former clubs, although it would be unlikely next season considering the extra burden from IFCF and other international competitions - she couldn’t help but feel as though she was going to sleep like a rock. Hell, even her roommates’ boisterous attitudes would not wake her up after she closed her eyes and knowing them, that would be something. As she let her dreams take hold, her last thoughts could be said to be a mini highlight package of the game, stolen from the replay she had been watching only moments before.

Other than Alyssa Hightower’s golden opportunity midway through the second half, there had been numerous other scoring opportunities, despite none appearing as clear-cut as that to a live audience. Skipper Raphael Brown had come immensely close in the dying moments of the first half with a long range effort from well outside of the box, while the only thing intervening between Eden Holt and the back of the net, direct from a corner, was the bloody crossbar. Other than those moments, though, the Sentients were unable to really produce anything to truly trouble the Tumbran defence as the Black Eagles took away their main strength - attacking on the counter and instead used it against them.

But with the Sentients improving day by day, game by game, you can’t help but feel as though that as the tournament progresses, they’re only going to become harder and harder to defeat.

Sylestone 0-2 Tumbra
none - Coleman 28’; Deighton 90+1’ (p)

Starting Lineup vs Racing @ Kinetik Stadium, New Colk

Brick Wall; Holt - Mornington - Hand Sanitiser - Dishwasher; Henling - Blair - Brown - Jones; Fleetwood; Hightower

Schedule:

Matchday One: Sylestone 0-2 Tumbra @ Kinetik Stadium, New Colk, South Newlandia
Matchday Two: Sylestone - Racing @ Kinetik Stadium, New Colk, South Newlandia
Matchday Three: Sylestone - Boring Paradise @ Kinetik Stadium, New Colk, South Newlandia
Matchday Four: Sylestone - Gouvanarch @ Kinetik Stadium, New Colk, South Newlandia
Matchday Five: Sylestone - Macbon @ Kinetik Stadium, New Colk, South Newlandia

by **Dod Rava** » Mon Dec 19, 2022 6:29 am

Dod Ravian Football National Team

Head Coach: Borys Berezucki • Trigramme: DOR • Style: -1

Formation: 4–5–1

Roster:

No. Pos    Name              Age  Club

9   ST     Jurek Jurson      20   UD Rawa
99  ST     Arek Milka        26   MKS Rawa 
8   ST     Sergio Fonz       30   OKS Behatów

54  RM/RW  Mateusz Gala      25   Dynamo Szczylek
21  RM     Raul Caballero    32   CF Nova Port
65  LM/LW  August Wilimowski 18   SKP Graboste
6   LM     Axel Soldado      23   WKS Adamowek

73  CM/CDM Cezary Rawski     33   Iskra Zarjia (AC)
82  CM     Omar Ascaso       24   Włókniarz Helów
2   CM     Aroa Baztán       22   Hajduki Pawelek 
3   CM/CDM Rayan Periz       18   Pogoń Nova Port
79  CM     Hugo Rolada       30   Włókniarz Helów

23  RB     Jorge Wójcik      24   Zima Ptakograd
47  RB     Matias Abad       19   Skałki Kamienski
5   LB     Gaweł Hoyo        21   Włókniarz Helów
7   LB/CB  Danuta Smoleń     30   UD Rawa

81  CB     Iker Gomez        25   MKS Rawa
44  CB     Eliza Szałwia     19   Pogoń Nova Port
43  CB     Sebastian Pazdan  35   Amica Koronki (C)
50  CB     Eustachy Placko   29   Włókniarz Helów

69  GK     Maciej Torian     31   MKS Rawa 
1   GK     Nora Lérida       18   Amica Koronki
96  GK     Olaf Bolea        23   Club de Spacoi

Kits:

My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers: Yes
Godmod scoring events: No
RP injuries to my players: No
Godmod injuries to my players: No
Hand out yellow cards to my players: Yes
Hand out red cards to my players: Yes
Godmod other events: No

by **Natanians and Nosts** » Mon Dec 19, 2022 5:46 pm

Natanians and Nosts struggles,but is able to start off the CE with a win

At the Friendship stadium,Natanians and Nosts defeated Quebecois Acadiana on the first round of the 34th Campionato Esportiva.The squad,lead by Márcus Ion Mutu (probably) for one last time,played 4-3-3,wearing its home kit.
The first period had a daring Acadiana put up strong pressure and make things hard for Natanians and Nosts.Natanians and Nosts could breath only at the 20th minute,after Caeso Júlio Probus stole the ball and managed to shoot from ~35m,but it was caught by the goalkeeper.This was not,of course, before Acadiana had its own good chances,specially with one of their players that kicked the ball.Twenty-three minutes in,and Acadiana nearly scores,but the ball just touched the tip of Mihai Xosé Apilescu's left glove,sending it off.The following corner was took short and Natanians ad Nosts stole,the ball,Laço Tralto passed to Caeso Júlio Probus,who saw a free Niels Numídio North,who ran 75 metres,getting rid of defenders and sending it into the net with no chance for the goalkeeper,opening the score for Natanians and Nosts.Two minutes later,Acadiana scored with one of their midfielders from a free-kick.Thirty minutes of first period,and a brilliant pass after a Natanians and Nost attack,Acadiana set up a counter-attack,when position was greatly favouring them since they have had been putting up pressure,which resulting in a forward of theirs scoring the turning's goal.The rest of the first period saw Acadiana take an extremelly deffensive position.Natanians and Nosts managed to make one more shot on goal with Caeso Júlio Probus at the 44th minute.
The second period started with no changes for Natanians and Nosts,while Acadiana swapped one of their midfielders.Five minutes in,Acadiana nearly makes its third,with the guy who just had entered.Ten minutes,Natanians and Nosts steals the ball near the midfield,Rato Ret crosses to Probus,who is just outside the big are,Probus feigns a shot,but instead sends it to Munteanu,who passes to the other Munteanu,he escapes a deffender and jumps over a tackle right after crossing it back into the area,where Niels Numídio North sends it backwards,Rodion Gabriel da Silva makes a false kick and the ball gets on Jorge Luís Humboldt's feet,to be sent onto the goal,with the Acdiana's keeper's gloves tasting it,but no chances,for it was the tying goal for Natanians and Nosts.Eighteen minutes sees Acadiana change one of its forwards,two minutes later,Natanians and Nosts changes Tralto and Ret for Carvalho and Domicianus.Twenty minutes,Acadiana misses a penalty,yellow card for Mihai Xosé Apilescu.Natanians and Nosts scored its third goal at the 38th minute,when Probus took a corner,crossed it to the area and Rodion Gabriel da Silva used his head to send it downwards into the goal.Acadiana nearly tied again,but Mihai Xosé Apilescu caught well-ly.Full-time,Natanians and Nosts 3x2 Quebecois Acdiana.
Next match,Natanians and Nosts will face Le Choix,who tied with Ha'Yarok this round.

by **Neomaris** » Tue Dec 20, 2022 6:14 am

There's a lot happening, but at least we can play.
Neomarisian girls and women found in field hockey a way to escape from the stress of a "building site" nation.

This is Neomaris' chance to appear on the hockey scene. Theoretically, being such an atypical nation, founded in the middle of nowhere and built at an overwhelming pace (sometimes less thought than it should), it will still take a few years before a clear style of play exists for the Neomarisians. Many people in Neomaris say they worry about more pressing things than sport, like the high cost of living on a planned nation where agriculture isn't fully established and more than 37% of the population is still living in temporary housing. But some of the citizens are using sport as an escape valve, to forget the problems and cope with the difficulties.

"I like Neomaris, I'm happy that I came most of the time. The beaches are beautiful, the climate is lovely, I'm a public officer, I have a paycheck better than I had back in Linville, but some things still worry me and my husband. The distance to Lisander is one of them, and prices of some stuff are too much volatile to my taste... but the housing is the worst. We live, me, hubby and our little girl, in a 36m² prefabricated container house. Our apartment is delayed because of the lack of materials. What makes this too hard? I remember when I was a child, I spend one summer helping my grandparents and parents building a clay bricks house for Cosette, a cow they had in the farm. Now we have less confort than a cow in those metal, wooden and plaster boxes. We've to wash our clothes in the kitchen sink, goddamnit. If I didn't have hockey at least, I think I would have quit and returned to Lisander", said Alice Rozan, one of the best amateur players that come to play every saturday evening in University Grounds, but had to turn down the national team due to her six-year-old daughter Lilianna's asthma attacks, which are worsened by construction in the country.

In any case, with the country's population made up mostly of immigrants from Lisander, of course you'd expect a lot of people playing the sport. The mobilisation that started with Sarah Landen and Laura Monserrate, professors at Neomaris University and former players of Metropolitan League clubs in Lisander gained traction and Neomaris University had hockey as its first constituted team (later followed by Rugby and Football teams).

And by backing the students' team, Neomaris University ended up supporting also the entire community. Late players are blooming, "Mom's Hockey" turned out popular again. Proper clubs and high-level structure are still plans for the future. It's long from professional, in fact, but the talent is there. It's good enough to form a national team, even if not top level, and participate, mixing amateur and university players, in the Regional Tournament of Esportiva.

The results can be seen, if not exactly in the scoreboards, but we hope we can reap these soon.

by **Tumbra** » Tue Dec 20, 2022 8:53 am

Sylestone 0-2 Tumbra

TMB (4-2-3-1):1 - Brennan; 18 - Willoughby, 5 - Proudfoot, 4 - Kerr, 3 - Mercurio (19 - Larkin, 68'); 6 - Harrison, 16 - Maguire (Hicks, 80'), 10 - Coleman; 7 - McDermott (17 - Haines, 68'), 9 - Hardaker (21 - Baker, 90' + 2'); 11 - Henshaw (26 - Deighton, 80')

TMB scorers: Natalie Coleman [28'], Gerard Deighton [90'+1' penalty]

Player of the Match: Natalie Coleman [TMB]

A selection of articles from around Tumbra on the night before the country's second match in the Campionato Esportiva against Gouvanarch.

Petra Hall opens up on why she refused Campionato Esportiva callup

Writing in an opinion piece for the Bencoolen Globe, Ararat Serevyan midfielder Petra Hall delved into her reasons for refusing a call-up by the Tumbran national team for the thirty-fourth edition of the Campionato Esportiva, the region's premier international football tournament. Her decision came as a stark surprise for most in Tumbra, and was met with a bevy of reactions — the fiercest of which came from right-wing political commentator Eugene Ziegler, who lambasted Hall's "weak-kneed, cowardly, anti-patriotic" decision as one of a "Tumbra-hater". Hall, who has Northlander ancestry, described her decision to refuse the call-up as "extremely difficult" choice, shaped by a "refusal" to partake in activities related to Tumbra while her "fellow peoples" were being oppressed by a nation that "has no rhyme nor reason to be there." She added that until a "political solution" was found to the matter, she would be refusing the call-ups to the national team "on principle," and if there was any chance of an independent Northlander nation forming, she would petition to be eligible for that side instead. The Rushmori Copa de Campeones winner (with Ararat), who has been capped thrice by the national team, is gaining attention as a technically adept, creative footballer known for her bursts of speed and goalscoring instinct.

Reaction to State of the Union continues to be mixed; referendum polling inconclusive

Four months after Prime Minister Stephen Williams announced his government's plan to create new states by merging existing ones, support for the plan mooted by the government remains remarkably even, with a poll commissioned by polling firm CampbellStewart revealing that about 37% of people have expressed support for the new state borders, while 32% are against it, and the remaining 31% remain undecided on the matter. The top reason that people cited for the support of the plan was "efficiency"; the top reason why people opposed the plan turned out to be "state identity". The announcement of the poll by a centre-right leaning government shocked many, and the move has split both major political parties down the middle; Labour, in particular, have seemingly struggled to come up with a response to the situation, being split on whether to support a Liberal government's initiative that has lined up with comments made by previous Labour governments, or oppose the initiative on the grounds that it is a Liberal initiative. Either way, the move has seemingly split the country down the middle; and while the referendum is only slated to take place in February 2032, the battle lines are already being demarcated in what looks to be an increasingly protracted battle. Former Georgia Premier and unsuccessful Senate candidate Max Young already announced his resignation from the Liberal Party following the result; and he maintains that he will "prepare an independent campaign" for the Presidency in 2032, which has already begun registering highly in polls.

State elections set to be barometer of support for Prime Minister, though local issues also dominate

Upcoming elections in six states are set to be seen as a key barometer of support for Prime Minister Stephen Williams, especially with the added dimension of federalism looming large over the polls. Yet, local issues remain the number 1 issue for voters in all six states, particularly in the state of Turvenal, which has seen the formation of a new, centrist political party — the Turvenal Democrats — comprised largely of former Liberal party members who have left the state party over premier Tony King's strict, budget-slashing agenda. The Turvenal Democrats, who have entered into an electoral agreement with the state Labour Party, are widely expected to be the biggest challenge to the state Liberal party's electoral dominance — they have held government for twenty-four years, since Roy Sharp took office in 2007. Similarly, in states with vulnerable Liberal governments like Alexandria and Westmond, in which Labour is tipped to win, voters placed the question of federalism as one of the less important issues of the day, but put the performance of the federal government as one that might shape their vote. "It's got the possibility of sending a message," said Brendan Willis, 67, a voter in Ridgewell. "Though I do wish we standardised the electoral calendar to make sure we only needed to head to the polls once every few years, and not once every year or so."

by **Lozho** » Tue Dec 20, 2022 9:05 am

Lozho 3-3 Vielfaltig

Obamovich 55'
Nakajima 81', 84'

Unknown 24', 45+1'
Unknown 37'

"Lod damn it!"

Sonzha Sozha cried out. The results were in, and they weren't great at all: the ECRP-sponsored Sugar Tax Ban and Marketing Freedoms Bill had been soundly defeated on the Assembly of Esportiva voting floor. Sozha had become a MAE to reform the region and advance essential corporate rights, but now these dreams have been shattered.

"How could this happen? I knew we didn't print enough 'For Your Consideration' campaign posters. Argh." sighed Sozha as he slumped into his chair.

"It's alright, dude. Sometimes life kicks you down like this. We just have to move on. Look, there's a proposal to protect the elephants! Don't you just feel like advancing the rights of elephant meat hawkers to sell their products?" said Brendan Zhungmire, his fellow MAE, in an attempt to cheer his friend up.

"Don't you dare say that to me." growled Sozha. "You absolute tool. I told you, DON'T include the part about minors smoking. The whole thing was about getting minors to drink more soft drinks, not your death sticks! Now wonder that only got 30% of votes in favour."

"Dude, I told you, they rigged that one against me. All these MAEs are on the payroll of the anti-tobacco juggernaut. When I passed the bill around the office, everyone looked really supportive of it! If we had normal, honest politicians in office this would pass with a landslide." Zhungmire protested.

"Great to see that you're just in denial. I guess that's one way to cope about these results." Sozha sighed. "But really? I mean it's all the typical hippie types voting against this. Probably drank some crap soda before and got scarred for life. Maybe I should offer everyone a can of- hold on there."

"What's happening?" Zhungmire leaned forward to try and see what Sozha was reading.

"Morgan Harsh from Hannasea voted against the Sugar Tax Ban. And your Marketing Freedoms." Sozha replied. "What the hell! I shook hands with her! I thought we were on the same wavelength. I guess some people just don't like fundamental rights."

"Maybe they do like corporate rights. But they just don't like you." said Zhungmire. "Look, the party she's in are in the Reform Party. Now, look who else is in there? Raj."

"You and your bloody conspiracies. Raj Zhaozhamhra is a nobody. Even if his irrepressible rage and hate towards me made him want to defeat our bills so badly he decided to lobby against them, there's no way other people would listen to him. Now get out of my office." Sozha barked. Zhungmire scuttled out of the room and Sozha was left all alone.

by **Cheetahs and reptiles Coalison** » Tue Dec 20, 2022 9:14 am

# name age position height club

starters:1-11 reserves:12-23

1	Ubiratã Ubirajara Ubiraci	30	goalkeeper	1,98	F.C. Loch Blue
2	Natenoghodi Natena		31	r. back	 	1,72	Napiini F.C.
3	Tata'a Tapixi Xaxim		30	centre back	1,80	High Plains F.C.
4	João Miguel Irima		30	centre back	1,80	Pira Guaçu E.C.
5	Indaje Nhakyrã Iraity		29	d. midfielder	1,85	Goj Kyfé F.C.
6	Natenaghanagha Natena		31	l. back	 	1,72	Napiini F.C.
7	Na'arew Nàrà'zyw		34	a. midfielder	1,77	F.C. TatáResape
8	Mario Giovanni Petrescu		35	d. midfielder	1,75	Goj Kyfé F.C.
9	Peri Ubiratã Tibiriçá		29	a. midfielder	1,77	F.C. Loch Blue
10	Rhinić				29	striker	 	1,77	F.C. Loch Blue
11	Sinusić				29	striker	 	1,77	F.C. Loch Blue
12	Cláudio Alberto Vieira		30	goalkeeper	1,96	High Plains F.C.
13	Napocenigi Natenaghaneghegi	30	centre back	1,90	Napigixo F.C.
14	Nozâ Norõwada			28	r. back	 	1,62	Napigixo F.C.
15	Mihai Ioan Ionescu		34	centre back	1,85	Goj Kyfé F.C.
16	Natalagha Napiini		28	l. back	 	1,62	Natena F.C.
17	Martim Nhana'i Nhamokyrã	32	a. midfielder	1,75	Aruanãs Azuis F.C.
18	Nhanarã Norõwede		34	d. midfielder	1,84	Awaru F.C.
19	Meiruguassu Moacir Silveira	28	d. midfielder	1,76	Guassu Guaçu F.C.
20	Tawato Inaje Akaju'y		27	striker	 	1,60	Cheetah Dinamo
21	Noledi Noniciwagha		27	a. midfielder	1,97	Goj Kyfé F.C.
22	Guaraci Ubiratã da Silva	33	goalkeeper	1,95	F.C. Loch Blue
23	João Guaraci dos Santos		34	striker	 	1,70	High Plains F.C.

captain's name is in blue

Style modifier:-4,227

My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers: No
Godmod scoring events: Yes
RP injuries to my players: No
Godmod injuries to my players: No
Hand out yellow cards to my players: Yes (only two per game)
Hand out red cards to my players: Yes (but never the goalkeeper)
Godmod other events: No

by **Cap Nord** » Tue Dec 20, 2022 9:59 am

“Wide. Wiiiiiiiiiiide.”

The sharp voice of Robert McEather carried across the pitch, getting caught by everyone in the Elephant Dome. Nearly everyone. Only after an echo from his fellow strikers, Daniel Clark executed the command but he came far too late to do something with the wide pass from Erik Brymsaeter. In theory, having two Sporting teammates on the same wing should have improved the cooperation. In practice, neither was playing the way they loved in this line-up. McEather kept ‘Pencil’ far more on a leash, forcing him to make deep passes whilst staying behind, frustrated. Forward Danny Clark, in turn, had to roam the wing on his first appearance despite being a fullblood player for the box. Kings Park’s Keke Offerman as such had a field day, cleaning up the stray balls by the dozen. The hour mark had come and gone and so far, nothing went according to plan.

In advance, the words ‘easing into the tournament’ had been uttered. Cap Nord was placed in a group with Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom, the opponent that had annihilated them last time around. As they formed the final assignment, it was important to ensure qualification for the second round early on. Against less experienced opponents, such as the one that was currently keeping them at bay with relative ease. Even more, the best chance had been for Aloysius Table, but he had found a few legs on his way.* Luckily, Siel Leuwert had not missed the date yet. New hot shot Marzinn might be breathing down his neck, but the Draiewikum veteran was not going to give away the national gloves without a fight. But in front of him, there was… It was not exactly chaos. It was not that people were running around in all directions but rather that they were not running at all. Receiving the ball was merely an invite to get rid of it as soon as possible.

Talking about hot breaths in necks, there was Robert McEather whose hair seemed to have earned an additional few shades of grey over the course of the last months. Clark and Bissett, two of the players he launched into the starting eleven for this Campionato, would be relieved of their duties. His thoughts hovered over a third youngster. By all accounts, it had not yet been the game of Simon Carstensen either. The youngest man on the pitch was carrying a weight on his shoulders, struggling as much with the ball as with the heritage of Jonas Persson. The former number ten had been discarded over his age (officially) and opinions (to those in the know). And now, Carstensen not only had to be the linchpin of Sandfjell Fotball but of the national team.

Another pass from one of the center-backs to Carstensen, who dropped deep to feel the leather. Pundits had already berated his position during half-time, discarding him as a natural playmaker. They had been spoiled by Persson, who never seemed to run yet always drew the ball to him like a magnet. Not so with Carstensen, who made long travels between the lines to harvest possession. And throughout that evening, nearly all of those had resulted in a wide ball to Poulsen or Brymsaeter, hopelessly searching for space.

This time, it was captain van Hilvaren who posted the ball with Carstensen. Willard simply let him, while Dusseldorf merely disallowed Carstensen to run all the way from the halfway line to the box, without exerting great pressure. All present already envisaged the control, the scan, the two or three touches and the easy pass. Except this time, in a blink of an eye, something different happened.

A quick control, turning outside instead of inside.

A vertical pass to Rohan Williams who had the smallest of boulevards in the halfspace between Manville and Salsa.

One touch and a hapless Dennis, caught out alone against the striker.

The start of the era of Simon Carstensen.

by **Katterimunk** » Tue Dec 20, 2022 11:17 am

The Debut

And the Sporting fest finally kicks off, and so does the Campionato. And this marks the first game for the national team of Katterimunk. The team faced The Five United Clans for the first game ending with a draw of 1-1. The team ranked 24th in all of the regions was to be a strong and yet perfect opponent to play the Katteri. And then came the kickoff. The Clans heavily dominated the start, shooting 5 shot attempts and 3 on goal in just the first 25 minutes. And then came the goal. In the 28th minute, the clan's midfielder played a beautiful pass that went up to the forward who shot it in for the first goal. Of course, this shook the Katteri fans, many believing that the game is gone for us now. But then started the offensive play. Starting from the 35th minute, the Katteri changed their playstyle. Katterimunk used a speedy playstyle. Moving up with the ball to attempt quick shots, and as soon as the ball is lost, press and retain the ball as fast as possible to move up and attempt more shots. All in all it was an offensive and pacy style. But starting the end of the first half, the coach decided to change things up a bit. Instead of quick move up, the team now focused on a slow paced but possession owning playstyle. Each attack had a build up with entire team building the game up for the goal- a more strategic approach. Of course this worked as the Captain and left mid Yuzman broke through to find an opening to shoot a clean goal clearly beating the nearby defenders and the goalie. The score at the 62nd minute went up to 1-1 and stayed till the end of the game. As the final whistle blew, the first game of the Katterimunk national team met it's end with a bittersweet draw.

The Five Clans United		        Katterimunk
1   	          Goals	                1
8(6)	      Shots(On Target)          9(5)
15	          Fouls	                13
0	        Yellow Cards	        2
0	         Red  Cards	        0
3	          Offsides	        2
4	          Corners	        2
	  Events	 
Unnamed (Goal )	           28’                  	
	                    39’	             G Shinoda(YC)
	                    62’	             Y Aftar(Goal)
	                    81’	             P Shayar(YC)

From shambles to Newlandia

Ali Zafar Yuzman Aftar was born 23rd March yr 95 to parents Ali Syed Yusuf Aftar and Ansari Aftar. At the age of 8, Zafar was thought of as a math genius due to his high IQ and his dedication to solving maths- that was before he found Football. He played football since he was 6 in school, but his interest got properly into the sport when he was 10.
"You know there was this girl I liked at school, and one day I saw her eagerly cheering the boys playing soccer and even hugging one of them after they shot the ball in the nets. And that, is weird, how I found my love, even after failing to impress my crush."
At the age of 11, Yuzman transferred to the Zomov Boys School in Ipheburn, a school renowned for their success in the junior championships. And Yuzman performed amazingly in these leagues, even being promoted to be the Captain of the team in his senior year. After entering high school, Aftar transferred to HSM High school, an elite school that also participates in the All Katterimunk High School Football Championship, getting moderate success in the tournament. And this was Aftar's golden school. In his freshman year, the man scored 8 goals from 6 games, being the first freshie to win the golden boot in the Championship. He also became one of the only few Captains in HSM high history that got his title in just the second year. And this year for Aftar was even better, as this was the year where he won the trophy scoring 5 goals in 6 games. Though he missed the Golden boot, he still was called the MVP. In only his 3rd year of high school, Ipheburn offered him a contract that he immediately signed(Back then there was no Liga Premera, and hence no rule of players to be of min age of 18). With this Aftar became yet, and forever, the youngest player to be signed by Ipheburn, that is unless the Premera changes its rules. He then went on to play the Clenston Cup scoring 6 goals in 4 games with a beautiful Hat-trick in the R of 16 game against Ansbrough. The most recent season, he played for Ipheburn as their Captain.

The First Game of Hockey on Field

The National Katterimunk Field Hockey team played their first game on the international turf winning the game with a staggering 6-2 against Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva. Field hockey is a minor sport in the nation with only a few but die hard fanbase as well as playerbase keeping the sport alive. The KWP decided to task the KBSA to form the national team for field hockey as they though it would a good diplomatic move to participate in more sporting events. And as Katterimunk succeeded in Ice hockey, they expected same from field hockey as well. The first game went good as in the first quarter the score went 2-0 to our favour as 2 goals one field goal by John Wusterwov and the other off of penalty corner by Osman Nikolai. The second quarter saw our opposition score. The second quarter began quite slowly as we ragged a goal, another from Nikolai at 10th minute of the quarter before Kelly Wise pushed in a clear goal. We went on to score another from the stick of Skukotov again in a Penalty Corner. The second half started with a score of 4-1, and the third quarter we were dominated by the Anglicans as they scored again, coming from a penalty corner struck by Norris. Most thought it was a Comeback, but Osman stated otherwise scoring another field goal in the last minute of the quarter, completing his Hattrick. Katterimunk finished it's goal tally with another goal in the fourth quarter coming from a penalty corner scored by the CF Wusterwov.

by **Fhulghamous Peninsula** » Tue Dec 20, 2022 1:07 pm

DISCLAIMER: Gaelic Gamers is an independents sports blogging website created by four cousins with a common liking and passion for sports of all kinds and is in no way or form affiliated with or organized by any official news organization in the Democratic Republic of Abanhfleft. All statements and opinions posted here are our own and not anyone else's.

Gaelic Gamers
Presents...

The Football Fallacies
with The Man from Markovsky

AH S***, HERE WE GO AGAIN

Hello and welcome to The Football Fallacies. Right, lads, so, uh… I think it’s time for me to make a confession. I think I’ve become a fan of the Fhulghamous football team! I know! Unbelievable, isn’t it? And yet I think it’s true. I think it’s actually happened. And to think that I only decided to cover the Fhulghamous Peninsula in the Campionato Esportiva because Graham O’Doherty needed to get some more of that sweet, sweet ad revenue via people clicking on his website… what a turn of events this has been! When I first decided to cover the Fhulghamous, I never expected to become mentally and emotionally attached to a bunch of teachers, plumbers, accountants, farmers, miners, and garbage collectors who have a common hobby and interest of kicking around a ball for 90 minutes on Sunday afternoons. Frankly, I blame the Colonists winning third place in the 29th Campionato Esportiva? Or was it the 28th? Maybe the 30th? Anyhow, the important thing is that the Fhulghamous Peninsula won the third place playoff in the same tournament that I decided to cover them, and I’ve discovered that I’ve begun rooting for the gray bastards ever since. I’m sure that if the Fhulghamous had crashed out of that particular Campionato in the group stage or the Round of 16 then I wouldn’t have bothered continuing to cover them for Gaelic Gamers. After all, this website was originally designed to cover Fleftic sports and only Fleftic sports, with apologies to all of the Pridnestrovians, Copperites, Oontazniks and now Estorians following this blog site.

The Fhulghamous Peninsula, even though it is sovereign territory of the Democratic Republic of Abanhfleft, didn’t really count as being Fleftic when they decided to form their own football association. But now, because they decided to become successful when I covered them, they’ve suddenly gotten themselves a spot in The Football Fallacies. And I don’t even think that I can afford to drop them anymore, not just because I’ve become a legitimate fan of them, but also because Boss Graham was right when he said that it was going to bring in more clicks to the website. If I drop my coverage of the Fhulghamous and the Campionato Esportiva now, it really could take a big chunk out of the website’s ad revenue, which also takes a big chunk out of my own wages. I don’t vent my rage at football players who don’t even know who I am on the Internet for free, you know. I may still live in my mother’s basement but I still have bills to pay! Okay, I don’t really live in my mother’s basement anymore, but considering that she owns the apartment block where I actually live, it isn’t really that far from the truth that I’m still living in my parents’ house, from a certain point of view. In the immortal words of an unlicensed seller of exotic animals, I am not going to financially recover if I ever decide to stop covering the exploits of the Fhulghamous Peninsula in the Campionato Esportiva. Them and Abanhfleft have already given me so many medical problems that I’m going to need all the money I can get from working here at Gaelic Gamers in order to cover any and all future medical expenses that I’m sure to get when all of this watching of the Fleftic and Fhulghamousian national teams finally catches up to me.

Anyway, to get back to the actual topic of this post, the Campionato Esportiva is back, and now in its 34th iteration. Once again, the Fhulghamous Peninsula have managed to qualify for the bloody tournament, and once again this bunch of mostly amateur footballers will have to ask their actual employers for a month’s worth of leave just in case the impossible happens and the Fhulghamous actually go very deep into this tournament. Oh, and just in case you’re wondering, there’s a new face in the Fhulghamousian dugout this time around. Antonis Papadimitriou is gone, long live Wellington Acuña. The 70-year-old Fleftic manage was hired by the Fhulghamousian FA a few months before the start of the current Campionato to replace Papadimitriou, whom the FhFA had fired after he failed to replicate the success that he had achieved in that one Campionato in which he dragged this ragtag bunch to victory in the third place playoff over one of the nations on my shit list, Brenecia. That’s probably another explanation as to why I’ve decided to support the Fhulghamous just as much as I do with Abanhfleft, but I’ve already talked about that before so I won’t beat this particular horse to death. Anyway, Wellington Acuña took charge of the Colonists a few months before the start of the Campionato, and if we’re going to take their recently concluded game against Esportivan Darmen at face value, then it would look like hiring a new manager just a few months before the start of one of the biggest tournaments in the colony’s history isn’t a very good idea. It might have seemed like one when they made it, but now it clearly is not.

Now, if you’ve got more than two brain cells inside your head, you can probably tell who really owns and rules a place called Esportivan Darmen. I can’t recall off the top of my head who their players are or what clubs they’re from, but it wouldn’t surprise me at all if most of them are actually professional players inside the Darmeni league pyramid, and we all know how good Darmeni football is. So it would stand to reason that some of Darmeni football’s greatness would rub off on their Esportivan counterparts, and judging from what I’ve seen in this match, that is exactly what happened, although you wouldn’t have known about it if you thought that the first half of this game was a good predictor of what was going to come next. Wellington Acuña, though he is already 70 years old at this point, is very much an animated football manager, roaming around the technical area and constantly shouting at his players to do this or do that no matter if his team is winning, drawing, or losing. Also worth mentioning is that Acuña is pretty much your stereotypical Fleftic football manager who prioritizes the offense and scoring goals above all else, a literal U-turn from the days of Antonis Papadimitriou and his defensive and patient football. But even though the Fhulghamous has already got a new manager, it would seem as if their old tactics are still ingrained in their collective minds as the Colonists were quite patient and deliberate with the way that they passed the ball and tried to find gaps in the defenses of Esportivan Darmen. That might be a bit of pragmatism on Acuña’s part, as he knew that he hadn’t yet had enough time to instill his own tactics into this team so he’s working with what he’s got at the moment.

Esportivan Darmen, for their part, didn’t really play the first half in the way that I expected them to do. I expected them to be a bit more sophisticated during possession, something like short but sharp passes meant to cut through opposing defenses like a hot knife through butter. Now, full disclosure, I don’t really know if that’s how mainland Darmen plays football, but it wouldn’t really surprise me in the slightest if they did. But Esportivan Darmen weren’t really like that. To me, it looked like whenever they had the ball at their feet, their first instinct was to immediately lump it up the field towards their forwards, but mainly to some guy named Demyan Borisov. Now that’s a name that wouldn’t be entirely out of place in a Ludogorets roster or even its starting eleven, but once again I digress. Esportivan Darmen’s main strategy for this game appears to be to get the ball to Borisov and then wait for him to do some magic with it. I mean, it’s clearly a tactic that works for them more times than not, given the guy’s goals to appearances ratio, but truthfully, I think it might be time for Esportivan Darmen to find a younger and faster striker in their territory to replace the guy. Honestly, some of the passes that Borisov’s teammates played to him in the first half would require the guy on the receiving end to be much pacier than Borisov actually is. The man is bloody 33 years old! Some of those passes had me thinking that he was going to need a bloody mobility scooter just to be able to get close! Who even needs an offside trap if the opposition’s main striker is slower than a turtle swimming in molasses?

Having said that though, our own offense is not blameless in this game as well. Now I’ve long accepted that neither Anselmo Iñiguez nor Julian Elvira are ever going to be setting world records in sprinting and running, but they’ve still got enough technical ability between the two of them to be able to convert the handful of chances that the Fhulghamous was able to create for them in the first half. Nobody needs to score a crazy stupid goal like what Mavis McGlamery just did against Toluiwa in the Independent Associations Championship. Whether someone passes the ball to the back of the net or smashes it in there, the end result is going to be the same: a goal. But neither one of Anselmo or even Julian could do something so simple. Probably the most egregious example of this was when Anselmo Iñiguez was practically unmarked inside the two-yard area and he got on the end of a cutback from Abd El-Hafez Eldozwi. But instead of putting the ball past Junior Wheeler, Anselmo somehow managed to hit the birds flying over the stadium instead! Like, what the actual fuck even is this? I mean, I don’t even watch a lot of Copperite football, but I have seen Iñiguez score at least a couple of goals from such short distance. And how you’re telling me that he’s forgotten how to hit the target from just two yards away without defenders or even the goalkeeper in his way? Give me a bloody break!

So the first half of the football match between the two Esportivan colonies ended in a nil-nil draw. Both teams had tried to threaten the other’s goal but none of those attempts really came close, barring that one instance from Anselmo Iñiguez in which he really should have opened the scoring. But it wasn’t going to be a Fhulghamousian player who would find the back of the net first. In fact, it would turn out that no Fhulghamousian player would be able to find the back of the net in this game because, barring that one instance in which this team somehow managed to nick a bronze medal from right underneath Brenecia’s noses, a team of amateurs and semi-pros is actually worse than a team of professionals, even if those professionals aren’t exactly playing for their mother country’s top clubs. As the minutes ticked away, Esportivan Darmen’s passing actually became less wayward, and they actually began focusing more on actually getting players into the box and providing threats and options instead of just lobbing it forward and hoping that one of the forwards could get to the ball. Clearly that didn’t work out in the first half, so it was time to switch it up to something that actually resembles counterattacking football. The number of Esportivan Darmen’s corner kicks increased as a result of this, and it was from one such corner kick that they would finally score the opener for this game. Noel White would put an inswinger into the box, and his center back partner Gruffydd Kitchen would finish the job.

Christ above, imagine conceding a goal to a guy literally named after one of the rooms in your bloody house! And I don’t even know if this is a result of the Fhulghamous Peninsula falling so far from grace or if this is just normal service being resumed after the aberration that was this team somehow winning third place in a previous Campionato. But neither I nor the team would end up having much time trying to figure out where it all went wrong as scoring the first goal had emboldened Esportivan Darmen into pressing for the second goal that would finally kill off the game. Meanwhile, Wellington Acuña went and replaced his front line wholesale, with both Iñiguez and Elvira coming off for Giorgis Agiasmenakis and Gerasimos Mouratidis, respectively. An injection of fresh legs would certainly help our chances of finally converting one of those chances that the Fhulghamousian midfield had been offering to their strikers on a plate, right? Yeah, well, not really. That was most certainly the plan, but the problem with plans is that circumstances might not allow for the plan being followed to the letter, and that’s what happened to the Colonists. Now that Esportivan Darmen had the lead, Junior Wheeler was determined not to let the Fhulghamous find a way back into the game, and he made three saves in the span of five minutes to thwart both Mouratidis and Agiasmenakis from equalizing for the Colonists.

As mentioned earlier, Esportivan Darmen had ramped up their attempts to score a second goal against the Fhulghamous Peninsula, and with only a few minutes of the 90 left to play, the team in orange finally dealt a death blow to the team in gray. Once again, Esportivan Darmen were on the counterattack, and substitute Fenton Alvey was bearing down on poor Thanasis Tsiros. The Fhulghamousian defenders had long been left in the dust, and the Charalambos FC goalkeeper was now the only person standing in the way of Esportivan Darmen finally putting an end to this game and the Fhulghamous still having the slimmest of chances of stealing a point in this contest. Or at least Tsiros would have been the Colonists’ last hope for a potential draw were it not for Alban Rogerson appearing out of seemingly nowhere and providing the outlet for Alvey to give the ball to, and Rogerson took care of the rest. There won’t be much time for the Fhulghamous to sit back and try to analyze where it all went wrong for them though as in just a few days, they’re about to play Neomaris, yet another Esportivan territory whose citizens and rulers are actually from someplace else. In the case of Neomaris, that place is Lisander, but this time it’s a bit more unclear to me what the actual relationship between Neomaris and Lisander is. Is Neomaris a colony of Lisander, a self-governing territory, or something else entirely? But really though, that probably isn’t all that important in the grand scheme of things because we’re not talking about geopolitics here, but sports. Speaking of sports, it would appear that Neomaris’s team is composed mostly of a bunch of amateurs and semi-pros, just like the Fhulghamous. Now this might be a game that’s more along the Colonists’ true level, but I guess we’ll see if they can handle these guys or not.

Well, that’s all that there is from me now. If you’ve got any thoughts or comments about the Fhulghamous Peninsula’s game against Esportivan Darmen or predictions against Neomaris then feel free to leave them down below. Until then, I’ve been the Man from Markovsky, starting to feel disappointed in my country’s colony.

  ESPORTIVAN DARMEN 2 - 0 FHULGHAMOUS PENINSULA  
      KITCHEN (73')
     ROGERSON (88')

by **Hannasea** » Tue Dec 20, 2022 1:34 pm

Butterfly City Mercury
Farewell then… the guild coin
Hannasea adopts Espo at midnight tonight

The Guild Federation is bracing itself for the biggest change in its national monetary policy since the first gilder coins were franked in the Hannasean Middle Ages: at midnight tonight, the Espo will become the official currency of the Hannasean Federation. Celebratory rallies and, in some places, protest rallies, are expected to throng the streets tonight, while ATMs have reported long queues already forming with some hardy individuals pitching tents to camp out for several nights in order to be first in line to withdraw the new Espo notes. But as Hannasea has moved to a largely cashless economy in recent years, it will mainly be on the financial markets that the impact is felt as transactions begin being processed in Espos upon the stroke of midnight. There are reports of the Federation Central Bank drafting in emergency teams and of financial firms in Butterfly City and Pearl City putting their operations staff on overnight call to deal with any unexpected fallout from the transition.

More than two years ago, Hannasea held an advisory referendum, in which the ‘Say YESPO to the ESPO’ campaign, backed by the opposition Liberal and SuccDem parties and some within the governing Conservative Party, triumphed over a collection of opponents representing the Hannasean People’s Party and assorted left-wing protest blocs. The FCB has engaged in extensive planning ahead of the planned implementation, but few can truly predict the impact of this seismic shift in a country that has always prided itself on the strength of its national currency. Despite the HPP organizing a mock “funeral” for the guild coin, the currency is expected to remain legal tender for several years as it is phased out. Starting tomorrow Hannaseans will be able to exchange their guild coins for Espos, and there will be many eyes on the exchange rate stabilization mechanism.

If Hannasea’s adoption of the Espo proves successful it will be a boost for the image of the EU central currency. Long considered a stalwart of fiscal prudence and financial dependability, Hannasea’s adoption would prove the Espo a worthy project. However, problems would prove deeply embarrassing as the EU continues to navigate the fallout of the departure of the South Newlandian founders, divisions over Tumbra’s presence in the Northlands, and concerns over human rights and democracy in Brenecia. Newly elected Grand Warden Evie Cameron said it was a “historic night” but emphasised the possibility of “minor teething problems”. “The Tea Ministry and the FCB stand ready to act tonight to stabilise the markets,” she said, “But I have every confidence in a smooth transition in this bold new experiment.”

by **South Newlandia** » Tue Dec 20, 2022 1:36 pm

Second cutoff!

If you notice any mistakes, please alert me ASAP!

Campionato Esportiva 34

Group A
Le Choix 4–5 Natanians and Nosts
South Newlandia 0–2 Acadiana
Ha'Yarok 3–2 Kalush

P Group A                               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Natanians and Nosts                     2   2  0  0    8   6  +2    6
2 Ha'Yarok                                2   1  1  0    4   3  +1    4
3 Acadiana                                2   1  0  1    4   3  +1    3
4 South Newlandia                         2   1  0  1    2   2   0    3
5 Le Choix                                2   0  1  1    5   6  −1    1
6 Kalush                                  2   0  0  2    2   5  −3    0

Group B
The Licentian Isles 5–1 Ummat al-Haqiqa
Katterimunk 0–1 The Hannasean Federation
Ceyne Isles 1–0 The Five United Clans

P Group B                               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Ceyne Isles                             2   2  0  0    2   0  +2    6
  The Hannasean Federation                2   2  0  0    5   3  +2    6
3 The Licentian Isles                     2   1  0  1    5   2  +3    3
4 Katterimunk                             2   0  1  1    1   2  −1    1
  The Five United Clans                   2   0  1  1    1   2  −1    1
6 Ummat al-Haqiqa                         2   0  0  2    4   9  −5    0

Group C
Drehda 3–2 Brenecia
Fhulghamous Peninsula 3–2 Neomaris
Dod Rava 0–1 Esportivan Darmen

P Group C                               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Esportivan Darmen                       2   2  0  0    3   0  +3    6
2 Brenecia                                2   1  0  1    5   3  +2    3
3 Dod Rava                                2   1  0  1    3   3   0    3
4 Drehda                                  2   1  0  1    5   5   0    3
5 Fhulghamous Peninsula                   2   1  0  1    3   4  −1    3
6 Neomaris                                2   0  0  2    2   6  −4    0

Group D
Tumbra 1–0 Gouvanarch
Macbon 1–1 Boring Paradise
Sylestone 0–0 Racing

P Group D                               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Tumbra                                  2   2  0  0    3   0  +3    6
2 Macbon                                  2   1  1  0    2   1  +1    4
3 Boring Paradise                         2   0  2  0    5   5   0    2
4 Gouvanarch                              2   0  1  1    4   5  −1    1
  Racing                                  2   0  1  1    0   1  −1    1
6 Sylestone                               2   0  1  1    0   2  −2    1

Group E
Vielfaltig 0–3 Xanneria
Cheetahs and reptiles Coalison 3–0 Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva
Lozho 3–3 Ancherion

P Group E                               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Xanneria                                2   2  0  0    5   1  +4    6
2 Ancherion                               2   1  1  0    6   5  +1    4
3 Cheetahs and reptiles Coalison          2   1  0  1    5   3  +2    3
4 Lozho                                   2   0  2  0    6   6   0    2
5 Vielfaltig                              2   0  1  1    3   6  −3    1
6 Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva   2   0  0  2    1   5  −4    0

Group F
Robostania 2–3 Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom
Kings Park 0–1 Bongo Johnson
The Shambia 2–4 Cap Nord

P Group F                               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Cap Nord                                2   2  0  0    6   2  +4    6
2 Bongo Johnson                           2   2  0  0    2   0  +2    6
3 Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom               2   1  0  1    3   3   0    3
4 Robostania                              2   0  1  1    3   4  −1    1
5 The Shambia                             2   0  1  1    3   5  −2    1
6 Kings Park                              2   0  0  2    0   3  −3    0

Esportivan Baseball Trophy II

Group A
Ha'Yarok                                   2 0 0 0 1 0 0 0 0  3
Tumbra                                     0 1 0 0 0 1 3 0 X  5

Esportivan Darmen                          0 0 0 1 0 0 0 0 2  3
South Newlandia                            0 1 1 0 2 0 0 2 X  6

Natanians and Nosts                        0 2 0 0 1 0 1 0 0  4
The Hannasean Federation                   0 1 1 1 0 0 0 0 2  5

P Group A                                  Pld   W  L   RF  RA  RD    Win % 
1 South Newlandia                            2   2  0   18   6 +12    1.000
2 The Hannasean Federation                   2   2  0   12   8  +4    1.000
3 Tumbra                                     2   1  1    8  15  −7    0.500
4 Ha'Yarok                                   2   1  1    5   5   0    0.500
5 Natanians and Nosts                        2   0  2    4   7  −3    0.000
6 Esportivan Darmen                          2   0  2    7  13  −6    0.000

Group B
Super-Llamaland                            0 0 0 0 0 0 2 0 0  2
The Licentian Isles                        0 0 0 0 1 0 0 0 0  1

Kalush                                     0 1 0 2 0 0 0 0 2  5
Fhulghamous Peninsula                      0 0 0 0 1 0 0 1 0  2

Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva      6 0 0 0 1 2 0 0 0  9
Le Choix                                   0 0 0 0 0 1 0 0 2  3

P Group B                                  Pld   W  L   RF  RA  RD    Win % 
1 Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva      2   2  0   15   6  +9    1.000
2 Le Choix                                   2   1  1    9  14  −5    0.500
3 Kalush                                     2   1  1   10   8  +2    0.500
4 Fhulghamous Peninsula                      2   1  1    8   9  −1    0.500
5 Super-Llamaland                            2   1  1    5   7  −2    0.500
6 The Licentian Isles                        2   0  2    5   8  −3    0.000

Esportivan Basketball Trophy II

Group A
Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva 76–43 Neomaris
Fhulghamous Peninsula 86–69 The Licentian Isles
Kalush 78–84 South Newlandia

P Group A                                  Pld   W  L   PF  PA  PD    Win % 
1 Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva      2   2  0  176 113 +63    1.000
2 South Newlandia                            2   2  0  170 151 +19    1.000
3 Fhulghamous Peninsula                      2   1  1  159 155  +4    0.500
4 Neomaris                                   2   1  1  126 157 −31    0.500
5 The Licentian Isles                        2   0  2  150 169 −19    0.000
6 Kalush                                     2   0  2  148 184 −36    0.000

Group B
Natanians and Nosts 66–67 Esportivan Darmen
Robostania 75–74 Ha'Yarok
The Hannasean Federation 81–69 Katterimunk

P Group B                                  Pld   W  L   PF  PA  PD    Win % 
1 The Hannasean Federation                   2   2  0  195 142 +53    1.000
2 Robostania                                 2   2  0  155 144 +11    1.000
3 Ha'Yarok                                   2   1  1  145 145   0    0.500
4 Esportivan Darmen                          2   1  1  137 137   0    0.500
5 Katterimunk                                2   0  2  139 161 −22    0.000
6 Natanians and Nosts                        2   0  2  139 181 −42    0.000

Esportivan Field Hockey Trophy

Group A
South Newlandia 3–5 Lozho
Tumbra 2–1 Le Choix
Sylestone 6–3 Natanians and Nosts

P Group A                               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Lozho                                   2   2  0  0    8   3  +5    6
  Sylestone                               2   2  0  0    8   3  +5    6
3 Natanians and Nosts                     2   1  0  1    5   6  −1    3
4 Tumbra                                  2   1  0  1    2   3  −1    3
5 Le Choix                                2   0  0  2    1   5  −4    0
  South Newlandia                         2   0  0  2    3   7  −4    0

Group B
The Licentian Isles 1–6 The Hannasean Federation
Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva 1–2 Neomaris
Kings Park 3–4 Katterimunk

P Group B                               Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 The Hannasean Federation                2   2  0  0   12   4  +8    6
2 Katterimunk                             2   2  0  0   10   5  +5    6
3 Kings Park                              2   1  0  1    7   7   0    3
4 Neomaris                                2   1  0  1    5   7  −2    3
5 Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva   2   0  0  2    3   8  −5    0
6 The Licentian Isles                     2   0  0  2    4  10  −6    0

Esportivan Handball Trophy

Group A
Katterimunk 20–27 Sylestone
The Hannasean Federation 30–24 Le Choix
The Licentian Isles 29–20 South Newlandia

P Group A                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Sylestone                     2   2  0  0   54  44 +10    4
2 Katterimunk                   2   1  0  1   50  50   0    2
3 The Licentian Isles           2   1  0  1   52  50  +2    2
4 South Newlandia               2   1  0  1   48  51  −3    2
5 The Hannasean Federation      2   1  0  1   52  52   0    2
6 Le Choix                      2   0  0  2   48  57  −9    0

Group B
Natanians and Nosts 22–24 Tumbra
The Five United Clans 24–22 Cap Nord
Robostania 14–29 Ha'Yarok

P Group B                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Ha'Yarok                      2   2  0  0   58  42 +16    4
2 Tumbra                        2   2  0  0   50  45  +5    4
3 The Five United Clans         2   1  0  1   52  51  +1    2
4 Robostania                    2   1  0  1   38  50 −12    2
5 Cap Nord                      2   0  0  2   45  50  −5    0
  Natanians and Nosts           2   0  0  2   43  48  −5    0

Esportivan Rugby Sevens Trophy

Group A
Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva 36–12 Natanians and Nosts
The Shambia 21–26 South Newlandia
Fhulghamous Peninsula 26–26 Le Choix

P Group A                                  Pld   W  D  L   PF  PA  PD  Pts 
1 Nova Anglican Admin Zone of Esportiva      2   2  0  0   84  12 +72    6
2 South Newlandia                            2   2  0  0   78  21 +57    6
3 The Shambia                                2   1  0  1   45  47  −2    4
4 Le Choix                                   2   0  1  1   47  50  −3    3
5 Fhulghamous Peninsula                      2   0  1  1   26  74 −48    3
6 Natanians and Nosts                        2   0  0  2   12  88 −76    2

Group B
Lozho 19–24 Neomaris
Cap Nord 7–36 Esportivan Darmen
Kings Park 12–24 The Licentian Isles

P Group B                                  Pld   W  D  L   PF  PA  PD  Pts 
1 Esportivan Darmen                          2   2  0  0   85  14 +71    6
2 The Licentian Isles                        2   2  0  0   48  29 +19    6
3 Lozho                                      2   1  0  1   45  36  +9    4
4 Neomaris                                   2   1  0  1   31  68 −37    4
5 Kings Park                                 2   0  0  2   24  50 −26    2
6 Cap Nord                                   2   0  0  2   24  60 −36    2

by **Natanians and Nosts** » Wed Dec 21, 2022 11:29 am

7	Petrescu	Prop
9	Apilescu	Hooker
10	Ionescu	  	Prop
11	Marão	  	Scrum-half
8	Varro	  	Fly-half
5	Marques	  	Centre
3	Torje	  	Fullback

50	Alves	 	Prop
55	Álvares	  	Hooker
15	López	  	Scrum-half/Fly-half
13	Alba	  	Centre
4	Rodríguez	Fullback/Centre

Team likes to score drop goals,and all that stuff,etc...

Should my opponent RPs first, he/she may do the following:
Choose my scorers: Yes
Godmod scoring events: Yes
RP injuries to my players: No
Godmod injuries to my players: No
Hand out yellow cards to my players: Yes
Hand out red cards to my players: No
Godmod other events: No

by **Sylestone** » Wed Dec 21, 2022 10:57 pm

Sylestone (4-4-1-1): Brick Wall; Holt - Mornington - Hand Sanitiser - Dishwasher (Toilet 69’); Henling - Blair ( 52’) (Bar Stool 69’) - Brown (Rodway 79’) - Jones; Fleetwood (Keyes 62’); Hightower (Tumble Dryer 79’)

Racing: Unknown

“I didn’t think I’d be saying this two games into the Campionato, but other than that game against Evermark back in Chamberley, we have not been able to create many opportunities - we’re just not getting into positions where we can break. It’s been four games since we last scored a goal and during that time, I can only remember a few genuine chances. Sure, we’ve played three top teams in that period of time but as we saw, all that’s done is allow us to fall into a rhythm of remaining competitive against those sorts of teams. Sure, Racing are statistically the second best team in the group but as we saw today, they are nothing of the calibre of Tumbra or Quebec or Tikariot. Yet, despite defending strongly and barely letting them through, we also had very little in the final third. We’ve got to become more proactive on the counter, as that’s where most of our breaks came from. Tomorrow, we’ll get to work on that and further analyse the game but it’s 11pm and each of you need your sleep.”

As striker Alyssa Hightower stumbled out of the room following Anac’s talk, she found herself face-to-face with teammate and fellow striker, the Tumble Dryer. Even as a Sylestonean native of 30 years, she still wasn’t quite accustomed to seeing anthropomorphic household objects with googly eyes and sometimes even little legs, and even here she had to try her utmost to prevent herself from portraying a facial reaction to the Sentient. It was a good thing she didn’t, either, as it moved in close to her and began to speak in a surprisingly haughty tone.

“How the fuck have you missed all of these opportunities? The one the other day against Tumbra, and those two golden chances today. I’ll be honest with you, sitting on the bench and watching some of that shit was absolutely unbearable. I’ll show you how it’s done once this blatant favouritism is stopped by our bloody manager.”

Hightower stood there for a moment, taken aback by her teammate’s outburst. Ever since she’d been part of a team with the Tumble Dryer, the two of them had gotten on rather well considering they were tussling for one spot on the football field, despite not being the closest of friends. Ultimately, that moment of time turned out to be a blessing as just as she was about to retort, she was forced to bite it back as a burly figure opened the door and stood, glaring at the pair situated in front of him.

“If you two are going to argue over things out of your control, then I have half a mind to send both of you home right now and bring other forwards out to replace you, even if you two are the best in your position going around. I will not stand dissent from anyone and while I’m open to suggestions from players, I will not have anyone talking behind my back about the decisions myself and the staff make. If a hear a peep out of either of you for the rest of the tournament - yes Alyssa, I know you didn’t say anything but I can tell that you were about to - then I will not hesitate to send one, or both, of you home.”

Both nodded to show they understood and without looking at its fellow striker, the Tumble Dryer took off to its room. Without anyone around to notice with Anac returning to the small portion of remaining players in the room, Hightower risked a slight roll of the eyes at her teammate’s outburst, before shrugging it off and returning to her room. She knew, deep down, that her last few games were well beneath her usual standards, but she wasn’t about to let that get to her. As a footballer, her mental strength was just as important as anything else.

* * *

“A tad boring, this,” announced the Hand Sanitiser, yawning. Over the other side of the room, fellow central defender Hugo Mornington snorted. After roommate Raphael Brown had announced his intentions to view New Colk via an early morning run, Mornington has invited the Sentient over to their hotel room to rewatch the match - something they’d been doing ever since they’d begun playing together, despite Anac’s insistence that they all watch the replay together, as well. Through this, they were able to improve their cohesion by picking up on things they could improve on together - something integral to the team’s performance as both were incredibly important players as the lead full backs. Hugo was particularly interested, for before he began to pursue a path in football that took him from Avondale to Z’ai’ai to Hesham where he’s currently based, he was studying analytics with a sporting focus, which meant regularly tearing apart games and discovering strengths, weaknesses, and everything associated. But now, both were on the cusp of falling asleep in front of the television… and it was only half time! What their coach was saying was true - while their defence was absolutely rock solid and the pair were utterly focused on that, even they could notice, clear as day, that work on the final third was required. By the rankings, Racing were the fourteenth best team in Esportiva but here, the Hawthorns were dominating in the midfield and defence. They just couldn’t get the ball past that Racing defensive line and give Alyssa Hightower the ball. And even if when they did, more often than not would she fluff the shot, prompting them to question what on earth had happened to the player who had received the Toilet League’s golden boot award a month earlier.

But before they could fast forward to the second half on the stream, the door flung open, Sentient skipper Raphael Brown standing there, hands on hips, startling the pair in the room. Instead of making a beeline for the shower as Mornington expected, though, the 31-year-old frowned at his teammates. “Where have you two been? It’s twenty to ten, and the team meeting started ten minutes ago. Coach is losing his shit downstairs while you two are frolicking in front of the television, probably watching some stupid South Newlandian soap opera. If you two take any longer he’ll fucking kill you, if he won’t already. You heard what he said to Alyssa and the Tumble Dryer last night. You don’t want to be on his bad side, either.”

With their brains frozen for the instant, only one word came to both defenders’ minds.

“Fuck.”

Sylestone 0-0 Racing
none - none

Starting Lineup vs Boring Paradise @ Kinetik Stadium, New Colk

Brick Wall; Holt - Mornington - Hand Sanitiser - Dishwasher; Henling - Brown - Bar Stool - Jones; Mixer; Fleetwood

Schedule:

Matchday One: Sylestone 0-2 Tumbra @ Kinetik Stadium, New Colk, South Newlandia
Matchday Two: Sylestone 0-0 Racing @ Kinetik Stadium, New Colk, South Newlandia
Matchday Three: Sylestone - Boring Paradise @ Kinetik Stadium, New Colk, South Newlandia
Matchday Four: Sylestone - Gouvanarch @ Kinetik Stadium, New Colk, South Newlandia
Matchday Five: Sylestone - Macbon @ Kinetik Stadium, New Colk, South Newlandia

by **Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom** » Thu Dec 22, 2022 4:43 am

National Football Team of Zeta Reka and Hügeltaldom
Fudbalska reprezentacija Zeta Reka i Hugeltaldom, Rekadom-hügeltaldom Fussballnationalmannschaft
Campionato Esportiva 34
Team Information

Roster
Keepers

##     Name                    Pref Role[1]        Age  Apps  Goals  Ast  Height  Club[2]
01     Aleksander Basilić      Sweeper (DF)        27   21    0      0    1.94m   Sword (EUR)
12     Zlatko Wukowić          Sweeper (DF)        33   127   0      1    1.86m   Lonngeylin Coast (VIL)
26     Barto Lukić             Sweeper (DF)        30   1     0      0    1.96m   FK-PRD Ofau

Basilić would be given the first spot in regional play with the understanding that poor results could see the twenty seven yer old darling bought back to earth. Zlatko Wukowić continues to have his place in the lineup, with some questioning his form. Domestic results for Barto Lukić give him more opportunities to play for his country.

Defenders

## Pos Name                    Pref Role           Age  Apps  Goals  Ast  Height  Club
04 LB  Marko Dieter            Fullback (SU)       29   38    2      1    1.77m   Leichhardt (NPH)
02 CB  Karlo Gabrielstein      Ball Player (DF)    29   70    4      2    1.79m   Slaterport Bulls (VLD)
03 CB  Denis Pretchel (c2)     Ball Player (DF)    26   11    0      2    1.83m   VZRH Matov-Uri
05 RB  Russo Filipowić         Fullback (SU)       26   11    0      0    1.84m   DD Porto Nowi
13 CB  Wukana Eriwić           Ball Player (DF)    27   2     0      0    1.84m   ŽFK Pltinstigrde
14 CB  Jan Muller              Ball Player (DF)    22   6     0      0    1.76m   Old Boys Club (EUR)
15 LB  Wenzel Bösterli         Fullback (SU)       22   0     0      0    1.83m   AFC Farnworth (TLI)
16 RB  Gero Albanhardhelmger   Fullback (SU)       27   2     0      1    1.73m   AK Stanimir
23 CB  Wlad Imrowić            Ball Player (DF)    18   0     0      0    1.78m   FKP Ottowić Okrug Jrs

The backline has two fullbacks and two ball loving center backs. The first choice backline for CE34 would be Dieter-Gabrielstein-Pretchel-Filipowić in order. The group were mostly established NT players. The substitutes were mostly were young. Two seven year old joined by three players under twenty three. Muller and Bösterli are playing in strong leagues. Teenager Wlad Imrowić was the odd pick of the tournament. Imrowić is a physical player with good knowledge of positioning. Imrowić and play will be looked at closely by the FFA.

Midfielders

## Pos Name                    Pref Role           Age  Apps  Goals  Ast  Height  Club
06 DM  Nikola Branić (c2)      Def. Mid (SU)       29   87    3      6    1.70m   1830 Cathair (AUD)
07 LM  Zaur-Luka Igorić        Wing (SU/AT)        29   137   19     39   1.77m   Langlois Océanic (KSK)       
11 RM  Luka Djordić            Wing (SU/AT)        25   4     0      1    1.82m   Barossia United (NPH)
10 AM  Marko Zup (c4)          Atk. Mid (AT)       26   86    20     19   1.74m   Myana (CMT)
17 DM  Lazar Macek-Leibermann  Roam Playmaker (SU) 27   12    0      2    1.77m   VZRH Matov-Uri
18 LM  Wlad Stojanowić         Wing (SU)           23   5     0      0    1.81m   Aleiusia Capital
21 AM  Wladoslaw Dorboslawić   Atk. Mid (AT)       28   24    1      5    1.73m   Platinastigrade     
22 RM  Tim Ulrich              Wing (AT)/AM (AT)   25   44    9      5    1.79m   Aleiusia Capital
24 CM  Eliza Meinward          Central Mid (SU)    25   11    1      1    1.79m   Prinsen af Rosen AC (CPC)
25 DM  Marko Desmirić          Def. Mid (SU)       24   17    0      2    1.77m   Athletic (SRS)

Branić and Macek-Leibermann, each offer different skills to the table. Branić is the most talented overall, with Leibermann offering more of a creative spark. The wing players will be making passed from wide areas and also cutting inside at times. Igorić and Djordić are two adept choices for this task. Marko Zup rounds out the staring four with his immense attacking abilities. The other names have flirted with some NT ball before. Some options also allow for the side to play in a 4-1-3-2 lineup, or other tactical shifts.

Forwards

## Pos Name                    Pref Role           Age  Apps  Goals  Ast  Height  Club
08 CF  Markodan Čech           Advanced (AT)       28   10    0      1    1.88m   Aleiusia Capital
09 CF  Bogdan Rawić (c)        Advanced (AT)       31   180   110    20   1.66m   Lokomotive Jarnstad (SVJ)
20 CF  Vilim Feinberg          Advanced (AT)       27   5     0      0    1.88m   Platinastigrade
22 CF  Marko Petarić           Advanced (AT)       30   0     0      0    1.79m   AK Stanimir

Čech and Bogdan Rawić were the first attackers for CE 34. Čech provides a physical edge to his game, while Rawić remains ZRH’s smoother operator. High coring domestic league players are the backups, with the debut Marko Petarić being a heartwarming tale of perseverance from a late bloomer. Fenstermacher Scwartzhammer’s absence is due to concussion issues before the event. His removal from the side moved Čech into the starting eleven, and brute force merchant Vilim Feinberg into the lineup.

Staff

Name                Role              Age Nation
Iwan Burien         Head Coach        47  Zeta Reka
Mitar Rajačić       Assistant/Analyst 35  Zeta Reka
Eike Eggstein       Goalkeeping Coach 44  Zeta Reka
Wladmir Bogdanić    Center Back Coach 38  Zeta Reka
Woz Danawić         Fitness Coach     39  Zeta Reka
Andrijana Protić    Trainer/Physician 56  Zeta Reka
Ilija Hrgotow       FFA President     53  Zeta Reka

[1]Estimates, positions not concrete
[2]affiliations accurate mid transfer window 38

Tactics

The new look ZRH lineup runs with a diamond set-up. Coach Burien would base this set up on the premise that the wings will work with one central player and the forwards to push for goals. Fullbacks push up for the final defender to find partners in a 2-3-5 set up. The side is balanced. Bruien's ZRH has a willingness to try for direct passes, cross often, and play with a moderate tempo. In tough defensive situations the team morphs with the midfield flattening out. The side does not sit far back, but isn’t expecting to deal with ultra attacking games. When transitioning the keepers and center backs are advised to use their heads, but play with their feet.

Kits

OOC

Style Mod: -1 (gah I'm late, sorry SNL!)
Do things to my team: y
Do things to me personally: n (ask first!)

by **Cap Nord** » Thu Dec 22, 2022 7:55 am

The referee, about to be reprimanded by his superiors, tried to explain his point of view.

”I know the recipient was not on the team sheet but… I do feel it counted as a yellow card for Cap Nord and should be added to their disciplinary record.”

And in the end, they confirmed that. Why? Well. Due to Eric, in fact.

Eric Bayard did not even like football. But his contract with the electronics hardware store had expired and he happened to play tennis with a guy who knew a guy. And if there was one thing that stood high on the list of skills, it was nailing job interviews. With charm and charisma, he slalomed through the various switches in his resume and landed another job, this time with the CNFA. Life at the association sounded like fun, especially as they all blindly accepted that he wanted a ‘launching period’ focussed on ‘assessing and auditing the existing organization’ which would allow an ‘ambitious and all-encompassing plan for our image’. In fact, Eric had simply copied the slidedeck he had used with his previous employer, swapped out the branding and logos and that was that. Previously, it had taken them a year and a half before they noticed the emperor wore no clothes: with that experience behind him, he could definitely stretch it to over two years.

The problem was that Eric did not like football. He had, for the outer world, an interest in the fine arts, theater and painting. Only his partner knew about his fascination for roleplaying, a sinkhole of his time. But he did not care about politics or sports and as such was the last Capnordic to find out about the debacle which had been the Cap Nord bid for the Campionato Esportiva 34. You know, the PR disaster which he would have to resolve. Apparently, the interviewers appreciated that he was the only candidate who did not focus the whole job interview on how disastrous it had looked.

As he knew, he had spent most of his first two months planning his trip to South Newlandia. Well, planning. There had been a lot of googling gifs of young elephants frolicking in the wild. And, considering the volume of the folder ‘C/Users/EBayard/Work/MarketingDocuments/Contracts/SNLRelations/Source/Material/gif’ on his work disk, it had been a productive few months. But as the day of departure inched closer, his superiors raised the pressure on him: what would be his great recovery for the regional scene? He even had missed an excellent play over a ‘late evening brainstorm’: although the vintage vegan pizza had been a quite nice touch. On the last day before takeoff, they had placed him on the spot: how would Cap Nord recover from this PR disaster?

So he came with the only possible solution.

A new bid. A better bid. One so far in advance that it either would become a lock for the CE35 or that people had forgotten about it by then. One that would be presented to the region in a prestigious setting. Not in some conference room, hotel lobby or online meeting: all of which were easy to be ignored. No, it would have to happen at the Campionato itself. The only problem left was to ensure that the perception got created that everyone was on board. For that, Bayard did have an idea. In the second game, the Whalers faced a small opponent in The Shambia. An isolated country that would bring few supporters. The own fans would undoubtedly be on board for the announcement, now it was just a matter of getting the neutrals, the South Newlandians on board. And so, Bayard googled for ’What do people in South Newlandia like’. All it took was a quick call with a shady handler and a forged license which said ‘service animal’.

Long story short, that evening, an elephant entered the Dome as the national anthems were playing, covered in a cape which read ‘CE XXXV - CAP NORD. FOR FOOTBALL, FOR THE WORLD’. The poor animal got startled by the enthused sounds of the crowd, in combination with the annoying slide trombone tunes of the Capnordic anthem. Did the handler make a mistake? A bit of malice on behalf of the animal, who had noted the dirty looks from the man in black? Or was it just a matter of being in the wrong place? Either way, the elephant accidently stomped on the foot of the linesman and found himself the recipient of one of the more bizarre yellow cards in the history of the Campionato.

by **Xanneria** » Thu Dec 22, 2022 10:31 am

Burns brace takes down new face!
SOURCED FROM: http://www.XTRASports.xan

SOUTH NEWLANDIA - Vielfaltig is a relative newcomer to the scene in the Campianato Esportiva. A young nation who was put up against wolves as the team from Vielfaltig had to play in the same group as two top-10 teams. Xanneria and NAAZE would both prove to be a tough test. The test against Xanneria ended 3-0 for the newcomers. A brace by Allison Burns helped lead the way as the star striker for Austin City got two goals in the second half.

The First goal though came from a beautiful header from Paul Gessecki who scored on a header. The goal came from a beautiful corner kick by Anton Vito, who was able to get it to Allie Jordan. Jordan, despite her 5'7' frame, pulled off a gorgeous header in the direction of Gessecki as the Xannerians managed to pull of a brilliant all OM goal for the first score.

Next up was Burns first goal. A simple slide through the penelty box, ended with Burns foot connecting to the ball and sending it pass the Vielfaltig keeper. An especially aggressive move from Burns given her short stature tends to lend to her playing wide and as a sniper. But today she played a brute, she had some very physical moments with the larger players and at 5'2" she could hold her own. In fact she got yellow carded at least once in the game for an off target slide.

Her second goal though was classic Allison Burns a long pass from Allie Jordan and she got by her defender with ease. From the outside top corner of the penalty box she kicked an arching beauty that couldn't be reached by the goalkeeper. Burns got her brace and the Maroons won 3-0. Up next though is Cheetas and Reptiles Coalition. A team that has proven tough to many a poor sould in the CE.

XANNERIA - 3
Gessecki 38'
A. Burns 59' 74'

VIELFALTIG - 0
NONE

by **Lozho** » Thu Dec 22, 2022 11:07 am

Lozho 3-3 Ancherion

Droozle 7', 12', 23'

Unknown 1'
Unknown 45+1'
Unknown 77'

"Mmm."

Raj Zhaozhamhra smacked his lips. The Golden Tomato always delivered for him. Today, he was having a tomato split with gold flakes. As Raj sucked on the tomato juices, he thought life couldn't get any better than this. Suddenly, he heard an ear-splitting creaking noise. Raj looked up and let out a deep sigh.

"Come to disturb my lunch, Sonzha?" Raj asked, before proceeding to look back down on his dessert.

"What exactly did you think you were going to achieve by lobbying against my bills? Huh? And look at me when I'm talking to you!" Sonzha growled.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Raj snickered. "Perhaps you could be clear so less of our times are wasted?"

"I mean, really. You're a businessman. I'm a businessman. We should be supporting things that would make businesses grow! Are you really so petty that you would shoot down 'Marketing Freedoms', a proposal that would make it easier for you to flog your deathtraps to people, to get back at me?" Sonzha replied.

"Hey now, that's a serious allegation. Lozho's Premium Huts and Shacks Inc. only makes premium shacks. As far as we know, that man demolished the bedroom wall himself in a fit of anger and it's nothing to do with the structure." Raj furrowed his brows. "Also, it wouldn't take the village idiot to realise why my party voted against those. As representatives from corporations not allied to your hideous conglomerate, a bigger market share for your gross soda and cigarettes means less money for us."

"Aha! So it WAS an attack against us!" Sonzha proclaimed. "Well, if you want to play it this way, you're going down. I mean, your President's Birthday thing was already delayed to next year due to your incompetence. Maybe if I did a little something the President wouldn't be so nice as to spare you this time."

"Don't you dare." Raj stood up and warned him. "I told you, I voted against personally, but I didn't actively campaign against anything. I'll leave you alone, and you'll leave me alone. Please?"

Sonzha pondered for a while, then finally rose from his seat. "No." He pushed back the chair, making even more ear-splitting noises, and spat on Raj's tomato split. He flashed a cheeky grin then strutted out of the restaurant.

by **Fhulghamous Peninsula** » Thu Dec 22, 2022 12:23 pm

(OOC: Finally finished this RP over the holiday break and server downtime as promised.)

DISCLAIMER: Gaelic Gamers is an independents sports blogging website created by four cousins with a common liking and passion for sports of all kinds and is in no way or form affiliated with or organized by any official news organization in the Democratic Republic of Abanhfleft. All statements and opinions posted here are our own and not anyone else's.

Gaelic Gamers
Presents...

The Football Fallacies
with The Man from Markovsky

COLONY VERSUS COLONY 2: CITY-STATE BOOGALOO

Hello and welcome to The Football Fallacies. Right, so after that disappointing 2-0 defeat against the Darmeni colony or whatever of Esportivan Darmen, the Fhulghamous Peninsula Colony had to pick themselves up from the ground, dust themselves off, and prepare to do it all over again, this time against yet another colonial possession located in Esportiva. This time, it’s the city-state of Neomaris, the planned capital city of something called the Lisanderian Esportivan Zone, that’s about to clash with this little Fleftic colony in northeastern Esportiva. Seriously though, what is it with all of these establishing colonies in the region of Esportiva? And why are they all playing against each other in the Campionato Esportiva? Hashtag rigged, am I right? Anyway, when you compare the squads from the two sides, it’s not immediately clear who’s going to have the advantage here. I’ve always thought that the Fhulghamous was the only side regularly competing in the Campionato Esportiva with a bunch of amateur semi-professional footballers, but as it turns out, Neomaris’ football team is almost exactly the same. What I mean by that is that Neomaris’s players are pretty much cut from the same cloth that the majority of the Fhulghamous’s players are. I’m talking about plumbers, teachers, accountants, construction workers, those kinds of guys. They’re playing for Neomaris in much the same way that grocery managers, truck drivers, and law enforcement officers are suiting up for the Colonists. The main difference between the Fhulghamous and Neomaris though is that there are some actual professional players sprinkled among the Peninsula’s roster while Neomaris is just straight up made of amateurs just looking to have a good time on the pitch.

Now, having said that, I don’t think Neomaris are currently enjoying life in the Campionato Esportiva at the moment. They’re just fresh off of a 3-0 beating at the hands of Brenecia, and let me just say right now while I still can that I am not looking forward to the day that the Fhulghamous have to play against Brenecia. Anyone’s who familiar with me will know that I really do not like Brenecia at all, about just as much as I don’t like Nephara and Pasarga and Nilrahrarfan. Bloody Nilrahrarfan! One of these days they’ll come back to play in a football competition, and when they do, Abanhfleft will be waiting for them to claim the revenge that they have been denied for so long! Bloody fucking Nilrahrarfan, man. That’s all that I have to say on the matter. One of these days I’m probably going to get over my irrational dislike and hatred for that country that only appeared in one Di Bradini Cup and yet managed to destroy the hopes and dreams of an entire generation of Fleftic footballers, but I’m sure as heck that today is not going to be that day. Anyway, to get back on topic, Neomaris was just fresh from getting battered by Brenecia, and it just happened to be their luck that they were up against a Fhulghamous side that was done licking their wounds after getting pounded by Esportivan Darmen in the opening day and wanted to get something done. And boy, did those Colonists get something done, all right.

I was going to say that the game started off with both sides being cagey and wary of one another, but apparently Neomaris never got to that part of the script because they went straight on the attack almost immediately after kickoff. But although Wellington Acuña’s men were initially caught unawares by this, after a few minutes they all managed to regain their bearings and reform their defensive lines. Thankfully, Neomaris hadn’t been able to take advantage of the initial chaos of the first five to ten minutes of this match, although that’s probably because their players are of the same quality as most of those playing for the Peninsula. But the problem for Neomaris lay in the fact that the Fhulghamous Peninsula actually had some full professionals within its ranks, and when they were on the field, they were all so obviously a cut above all the rest, even their own teammates. Now I know that I’ve made fun of Anselmo Iñiguez more than a few times on this website owing to how long it took for him to accelerate to full running speed, and how that obviously didn’t often leave him enough time and room to stick the ball into the back of the net, but that’s when he’s up against world-class opposition. It’s probably fair to say that Neomaris is nowhere near that level just yet, and so to me it wasn’t that much of a surprise when the bastard forward from Atletico Bed Deg in Copper Cuprum scored the opening goal of the game.

Now that Iñiguez goal in isolation was already crazy enough to begin with, but when you think about it, what else needed to happen for that goal to go into the back of the net in the first place? Well, first of all, this was not on the Neomaris keeper at all. Anselmo simply hit that ball with so much power and venom that Leopoldo Monteverde was simply not going to save it even if he had gotten a glove or even just a fingertip on it. Fine margins, sure, but there was simply nothing that Monteverde could have done to stop it. But you know who could have done something to stop it? Mario Bonini. Sure, he’s part owner of a supermarket chain along with the rest of his brothers, and apparently he knows how to pressure an opponent, but apparently he hasn’t yet faced an opponent who regularly plays in a professional football league. Not until he went up against Anselmo Iñiguez, that is. Sure, the Copperite National League isn’t really the biggest league out there; heck, it’s not even the biggest league in Esportiva, or even its own little corner of Esportiva. But Anselmo has played against enough pros who are actually trained in the art of pressing that he knows how to deal with an amateur presser (amateur in the sense that Bonini’s probably not getting paid, or at least paid much, to play football). Or at least he looks like he knows how to deal with those kinds of pressers.

However, just because Neomaris was mostly made of amateurs doesn’t mean that they didn’t have quality of their own, and though they weren’t able to show much of that against Brenecia, they most certainly had a chance to do so against the Fhulghamous! Now that they’re playing against competition on a roughly similar level to them, Neomaris could now actually determine how well they could actually play against fellow amateurs, and you could tell that they were actually enjoying both themselves and the experience this time around. And it should probably come as no surprise that it was their star prospect Christian Gastaldi who managed to score the equalizer for the Lisanderian-owned city-state. This Gastaldi guy may just be 18 years old but it’s clear to anyone watching the Campionato that he’s a true talent, and that it could all go to waste if he doesn’t find a move away from Neomaris soon. He might have to wait a few more years before he could do that though as apparently there’s some law preventing someone who moved to Neomaris from going back to Lisander on a permanent basis unless they had stayed at the city-state for at least three years. So, while he’s waiting for the chance to finally get out of Neomaris and join probably a Lisanderian club, Christian Gastaldi is going to keep dancing in and around defenders in the Campionato Esportiva, and Gastaldi is probably going to become part of Abd El-Hafez Eldozwi’s nightmares about pacey and tricky forwards getting around him and scoring goals.

No time for the Fhulghamous to dwell on all that though as the first half came to an end a few minutes after Gastaldi’s goal, and Wellington Acuña knew that he had to light a fire under the asses of his players if he wanted them to reclaim the lead that they had had before Christian Gastaldi showed up to show them all up. If there was one thing that Acuña knew, it was that two draws were not the way for the Fhulghamous to get back to their “glory” days of getting all the way to the third place playoff. See, the air quotes over the word “glory” in the Fhulghamous Peninsula’s glory days is because it’s difficult to really see this team having a glorious period worth the term’s salt, but who knows? Maybe we’re just witnessing the start of something much more different, or maybe it’s yet another false dawn for a territory which already feels conflicted with how their main nation has suffered from numerous false dawns. But here’s something to consider when talking the possible rise of the Fhulghamous as an actually competent and even competitive team in Esportiva: they’re actually trying to do something more creative with the ball now. Back in the Papadimitriou days, goals felt like they were more happenstance than anything else, like the main objective was always just to hang on to the ball and not give their opponents the opportunity to create something from it. But now, it really does look like the players have a plan when it comes to the ball; they’re not just holding it for the sake of holding it, but they actually move forward and try to find gaps and spaces in which to score now. Kinda jarring to see it happening now when it wasn’t present at all in Acuña’s first game, but hey, it would actually work for the Colonists later on as we were going to see.

The Fhulghamous was once again the team on top at the start of the second half, and within five minutes the Colonists had the lead once again. But it wasn’t someone like Anselmo Iñiguez or Julian Elvira or one of the usual suspects who got the goal. No, it was actually Krystallis Antonakakis who scored the bastard goal for the Fhulghamous! And it literally was a bloody “sweaty goal” that the young ones always love to score on those online football games where one player rushes the keeper before passing the ball to a teammate who now has a clear shot because the opposing goalie was so focused on the first player that he didn’t notice everyone else rushing into his own box. It was the kind of goal that would make you tear your own hair out if it was against your team, but would also make you laugh at the other keeper’s stupidity if it was your team that scored it. Look, I know that neither Neomaris nor the Fhulghamous are ever going to be the best of the best in terms of football, but surely even Leopoldo Monteverde must have realized that things couldn’t possibly be that easy when he saw both Elvira and Antonakakis bearing down on him with his defenders struggling to play catch-up. I don’t always feel that a goal is coming, but when I do, it’s only when it’s painfully obvious for everyone else to actually see, like this instance.

And it was Krystallis fucking Antonakakis who bloody scored the goal as well! You guys are probably more familiar with him as being a Fhulghamousian national team player first and foremost, but real OGs will remember that there was a time when a 16-year-old Krystallis bossed the midfield for Sarvusdalamoive against Ludogorets at the Stadium of the Old Forester. There was a time when people thought that a call-up to the Fleftic national team was a matter of when and not if for Antonakakis, but a number of disciplinary issues (coupled with his own mother’s claims that he needed a move away from Sebet because he was being bullied by his teammates there) severely tanked his market value, and he ended up being let go by Sarvus before drifting his way back to his native Fhulghamous and hometown club UD Nuevo Carthago. Whether we actually believe that he was acting out or not, Antonakakis returning to the Fhulghamous might have damaged his short-term prospects, but in the long term, it might actually have been the best thing that’s happened to him because going back to his roots made him realize what he could have had and what he now actually has, and he’s now determined not to let this opportunity go. And I would say that it’s worked out well for him so far since he’s now been in the Fhulghamousian national side for three tournaments running. For those of us in Markovsky who were wondering what happened to the kid who absolutely destroyed our midfield all those years ago, well, here he is.

For almost a quarter of an hour after Antonakakis scored his sweaty goal, it looked like the Fhulghamous might actually have had this game in the bag. Not that Neomaris looked like they had been soundly defeated and shattered; it was more like the Fhulghamous just actually knowing how to defend for once in their careers. For that amount of time, some fans of the Peninsula (yes, they exist, and there are dozens of them! I mean us!) really did begin to think that their team could actually pull off a win that didn’t give them heart palpitations like what Abanhfleft does to its fans on an almost daily basis. However, there was always that one guy who had to ruin everything, and of course it was none other than Christian Gastaldi. Christ above, that kid really wants to get out of Neomaris, don’t he? I really think he’s doing everything in his power to get noticed, not just by clubs in Lisander but also in other places! Heck, I think he’s trying to make himself known well outside Esportiva with the performance that he just put on against us, and I wouldn’t be surprised if someone made a move for him as soon as he can finally get out of his bloody city-state home! In an almost carbon copy image of the second goal that the Abanhfleft women’s team gave up against Toluiwa in the Independents Cup, Gastaldi once again left Abd El-Hafez Eldozwi chasing shadows and then had the awareness to chip the ball over Thanasis Tsiros once Gastaldi saw that the Colonist keeper had committed to going down. None of them knew it then, but Gastaldi’s second goal was going to set off a series of events that would turn this game into one of the wildest, if not the wildest, that the 34th Campionato Esportiva has ever seen.

Neomaris sensed that the Peninsula were there for the taking since the lads were still reeling from giving up yet another goal to the city-state’s wunderkind, and thus the rest of those bastards continued battering away at the gates. Though the Colonists appeared to be holding their own through all of this, you just had the feeling that sooner or later the net was going to bulge once again, and it wasn’t going to be from the foot of a player in gray this time around. Or maybe it would, but it would go down as an own goal. That was how heavily Neomaris was knocking on the door of Thanasis Tsiros’s goal; a third goal from them always seemed to be inevitable after Gastaldi had scored his brace, and to them it didn’t really matter if it came off the boot of one of their own or if it was smashed into the net by a panicking Fhulghamousian. Thankfully for the Peninsulars, one of them wouldn’t have to suffer the indignity of having the acronym “o.g.” right next to their name when Neomaris finally did score, but the Colonists didn’t really cover themselves in glory either. Maybe Victor Jansen said that he was going to arrest the likes of Miltiadis Mouzakis and Tilemachos Dermentzis that he was going to arrest them if they didn’t give him enough space to head the ball into the bottom left corner. Now I’m pretty sure that such a thing would be a massive abuse of authority and overstepping of boundaries if that’s indeed what happened, but it’s also far more plausible that the Fhulghamous just happens to defend like headless chickens sometimes. Don’t attribute to malice what can usually be explained by stupidity and all that.

Talk about a rollercoaster of emotions. From the dizzying heights of hope, the Fhulghamous had been brought right back down into the pits of despair. Just when it looked like they were actually going to be able to hang on to the victory against Neomaris, the city-state had to come back from the brink and then take the lead against the Peninsula. And there were only twenty minutes left for the Colonists to recover something, anything, from this contest, or else they could consider their Campionato Esportiva campaign done and dusted yet again, and not in the way that they would have wanted either. It really was three points or bust for the Fhulghamous, and Wellington Acuña pretty much threw on anyone and everyone that he could in order to turn this around once again. And it actually fucking worked for the guy. He didn’t know it, but he actually might have just discovered the Fhulghamous Peninsula’s newest footballing star in this game in the form of Zakaria Fihraoui. I mean, even Zakaria himself probably didn’t know that he was going to become the Peninsula’s newest star in this game when he came on for Krystallis Antonakakis, but he would end up becoming the “chosen one” for the Colonists this time around.

To say that Fihraoui made an instant impact upon coming on for the Fhulghamous is putting it lightly. The Peninsula suddenly looked like a much bigger threat to score than they had been for the past 25 minutes, and I’m not really sure how the fuck that happened. All I know is that one minute the Fhulghamous looked like they were pinned inside their own half thanks to continued attempts by Neomaris to fully secure their lead, and the next the Colonists were on the break. Not only that, but Zakaria Fihraoui had become the most advanced player on the field for the team in gray, beating even the likes of both Anselmo Iñiguez and Gerasimos Mouratidis in being so far up the pitch. In fact, it was Mouratidis who made the diagonal pass from literally the halfway line for Fihraoui to chase, and the 20-year-old bastard from Marinos Thimpodopoulos only needed two touches at most to settle it down before he made a dinky little cutback and let loose from just outside the box, putting just enough spin and power on the ball to not give Leopoldo Monteverde a chance of saving it even when he had managed to put a gloved finger to the bloody thing.

Now the chase was on for the goal that would finally win the bloody game once and for all. Neither the Fhulghamous nor Neomaris were willing to back down at this point, not when both of them had held the lead at various points during the game. It was also getting physically heated out there on the pitch itself, with yellow cards being brandished left and right in the final fifteen minutes. It’s a downright miracle that nobody got sent off in this game, and I don’t know if that’s because everyone realized that a red card was going to be such a massive game-changer or if the referee became a little more lenient once he had made his point that he was not going to suffer any more shenanigans. In any case, after an initial flurry of yellow cards as both teams tried their absolute best to get what was rapidly becoming the decisive seventh goal in the game, both teams finally calmed down somewhat, but that didn’t stop them from trying to find the back of the net nevertheless. Eventually, with only a few more minutes left to play, the Fhulghamous got an opportunity when they were awarded a free kick right in front of the Neomaris goal. There was some debate as to who would actually take the free kick, and then to the surprise of some and the delight of others, Zakaria Fihraoui assumed the responsibility. He had already shown that he had some range with his earlier goal, but did he really have that much range with his right foot? Turns out that yeah, he actually does.

Well, that really is all that there is from me now. I simply cannot believe how many words I just put into this massive fucking post just to talk about this bloody game. In any case, it’s now time to move on to the next one, which is against bloody fucking Brenecia. My body is not ready for this. It’s really not. But in any case, if you’ve got any thoughts or comments of your own about the game against Neomaris or predictions against Brenecia then feel free to leave them down below. Until then, I’ve been the Man from Markovsky, hoping that I wouldn’t be completely disappointed in my country’s colony once again.

  FHULGHAMOUS PENINSULA 4 - 3 NEOMARIS             
          IÑIGUEZ (12')       GASTALDI (39', 63')
      ANTONAKAKIS (50')       JANSEN (70')
    FIHRAOUI (75', 88')

by **Har Yarok** » Thu Dec 22, 2022 1:47 pm

Green & Blues claim important points as they look to put past wrongs right

A rare win for the beleaguered Ha’Yaroki national football team at CE34 in South Newlandia has rallied the mood in the camp as they enter what is now their fifth consecutive CE campaign. Only captain Smuel Kahn of Brookstation’s Shkotan FC remains in the squad from eight ago years in the Licentian Isles, and in that time he has seen the Green & Blues struggle to pick up regular wins, making the three points they took against Kalush at the Stadium of Friendship all the more vital. Ha’Yarok left the last Campionato Esportiva under bitterly disappointing circumstances with a final day defeat to Quebecois Acadiana and elimination to Fhulgamous Peninsula on head-to-head goals-for count, and Kahn’s team are determined not to “repeat past mistakes” by letting “points slip from our grasp”. Kahn himself calmly slotted an 87th minute penalty to level after the Green & Blues fell behind to successive second half strikes from Kalush, and substitute Avidor Speyer was the hero deep into added time with the headed winner, sparking raucous celebrations among the small but faithful band of fans who had made the trip out to Elephant Valley.

The victory followed an opening day draw against Le Choix in which the Green & Blues dominated possession and completed more than three times as many passes as their opponents, but proved frustratingly unable to break the staunch defensive press, and when SV Großbach-Zierenräschen defender Jeremias Grossman clattered Aurélie Dior* as both leapt for the ball, fears that Ha’Yarok might go down without getting a shot on goal began to bubble up. Dior* converted the penalty with ease. But, seven minutes later, some good interchange play set free Johnathan Poupko, whose selection as the first black Ha’Yaroki to represent the national team has caused much discussion back home: he was content to let the football do the talking as he burst down the right flank and threaded a wonderful cross in for debutant Jaydon Kosmin, sliding in, to somewhat inelegantly but incredibly effectively scuff into the roof of the net. The Green & Blues weren’t able to summon up another scoring chance in a game dominated by leaden defending on both sides, but came away satisfied with the point.

Ha’Yarok 1–1 Le Choix
Goals: Kosmin 67’; Dior* (pen.) 59’

Ha’Yarok 3–2 Kalush
Goals: Breytenbach 26’, Kahn (pen.) 87’, Speyer 90+5’; ?? 67’, ?? 75’

* Assuming same Le Choix team from last roster.

Even going for Ha’Yaroki teams on opening days of Sporting Festival

South Newlandia’s small population has grown a little in recent weeks as teams from across Esportiva, and following them staff, press, and fans, arrive to take part in the 2nd edition of the Sporting Festival. Ha’Yaroki teams enjoyed generally good form through the first two days, giving hopes of an improved performance on two years ago. In baseball, the Silver Stars went 1–1. They picked up an opening day win against Natanians and Nosts thanks to a fine pitching performance from starter Jael Ballin, who gave up just 4 hits and 1 walk while striking out four and appeared on the verge of a complete game shutout before getting into trouble in the 9th and putting two runners on. A spectacular diving catch in left by Freddie Duchen ensured the Silver Stars held on for the win, however. Earlier, he and Arlin Einhorn had knocked in RBI singles for the only runs of the game; Duchen finished 2–4 with 1 RBI and 1 2B, and Einhorn 2–4 with 1 RBI and 1 3B, though the first baseman blotted his copy book with an overambitious attempt to steal home after hitting his triple, and was caught embarrassingly short.

Unfortunately, Tumbra proved tougher fare on day 2. It was once again the Duchen and Einhorn show on offence: the two got the team off to a great start as Duchen walked, stole 2nd, and scored off Einhorn’s home run blast to deep right field. Tumbra clawed one back through a messy second inning that saw two hits, a walk, a hit by pitch, and a runner scoring on a wild pitch from long-serving Silver Stars starting pitcher Henry Green, before it was Duchen’s turn to go yard with a line drive to dead centre. 3–1 up through five, things looked to going well, but a costly fumble from the experienced Tzefanyah Herzl at third base put a runner on through an error, advancing on a sacrifice bunt and a walk, and eventually scoring on a single, after which Green’s day was done, but the relief blew the save through a read-it-and-weep sequence of walk, single, double, single, single before recording a single out in the 7th.

Basketball saw the Raptors nearly throw away their opening game, against Esportivan Darmen. They coughed up two turnovers, went 1–of–4 on free throws, and failed to grab a single rebound inside the last two minutes, but Llewellyn Leavitt missed back-to-back jump shots with a chance to win it. That left the score 71–70 in the Raptors’ favour. Melchior Mankowitz had a huge game with 18 points and 14 rebounds, and Ezekiel Kuttab had 16 points and 6 rebounds. Terance Swanson led Esportivan Darmen with 16 points and 8 rebounds, including two clutch offensive boards in the last 90 seconds, but was let down by his team shooting just .272 from three-point range. Another nerve-jangler followed against Robostania, but this time the errors cost the Raptors. Dalit Danielovitch turned the ball over on a sharp steal by Trevor Tennyson, Leonard Batistuta drew the foul and converted his free throws to put Robostania up by one, and with less a second on the clock Danielovitch missed his jumper to put the game out of reach. Kuttab’s 20 point, 12 rebound double-double wasn’t enough on the night; Edwin Keakeu, with 24 points, led all scorers.

Spare a thought then for perhaps the least heralded of the four Ha’Yaroki teams in South Newlandia: while national attention was squarely focussed on football, even basketball and baseball had to compete for a share of the coverage, and handball flew entirely under the radar, yet they were the only Ha’Yarokis to come away with 2 wins from 2 in the Festival’s opening weekend. Izreal Kaplan briefly trended on twii.tur as a #RightWingerWeCanTrust as the investigations into conservative Prime Minister Avi Goldsmid’s personal finances continues; Kaplan scored 8 goals in the Blue Horses’ nail-biting win over the Five United Clans of the Northland, with Yaremka Mohilewer making 12 saves. He also scored 7 goals, along with Nahum Balsam, as the Blue Horses trounced Robostania 29–14 to take an early lead in qualifying for the finals. The enlarged Ha’Yaroki participation drew positive reviews from fans back home watching on broadcast, with hopes of increased involvement in regional and international sports to follow.

Campionato Esportiva 34 & Sport. Fest. 2 - Everything Thread

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