The Grey Wardens: Warden-Lieutenant Eshialand

[Reventus Koth]

A strong showing last night from the Wardens and their allies. Sygian's return to the battlefield as a triggerman found him face to face with hungry opposition, and we are glad to have claimed even the two wins we got.

[Quebecshire]

... triggerman ...

Triggerman? Is this a Krunker reference?? Based???

[The Sygian]

A strong showing last night from the Wardens and their allies. Sygian's return to the battlefield as a triggerman found him face to face with hungry opposition, and we are glad to have claimed even the two wins we got.

Baptism by fire, if you will.

Good show-out last major. Seems like everyone's gotten 10x quicker since I've been out.

[Tim-Opolis]

Charging into a dominant summer against our favorite Combat Simulator

LIBCORD ⛨ .here ⛨ LIBCORD ⛨ in ⛨ LIBCORD ⛨ switch ⛨ LIBCORD ⛨ win

As much fun as it has been allowing raiders to have their swan song in these trying months, we're a little behind schedule on ensuring the collapse of Raiderdom and its infrastructures. We saw it fit to first help raiderdom trim off all that unneeded ballast by clearing the majority of their embassy lists through our detag efforts, and are now focused on ensuring that those embassy lists stay that way. While the blows have largely been traded with turnouts contrasting on different nights, the goal of maintaining a double-digit chasing core for the summer is well underway. Through significant effort, our power will swell, and we together with all our coalition allies shall find victory in this war.

It is in this recognition that LILY.ai has once again been booted up. A state of the art, elite combat simulation, the efforts of Lily's Buzzy Bees allow for us to hone our craft while forging through fire a new generation of elite defenders.

On tonight's test run of our combat capabilities, Libcord Fire Teams consisting of a cumulative thirteen chasers accomplished over one-hundred defenses against two teams of Lily + Brotherhood of Malice troops. Held back from breaking our records by the raider teams continuously missing their jumps, and at times running at an insufferably slow pace, we nonetheless persevered to unquestionably ensure only one side could claim victory tonight. While a satisfying test of our capabilities, enemy combatants still took ~20 regions, so we will be sure to adjust variables and work towards the ultimate goal of consistently shutting down all raider activity.

What follows is so many wins that we had to bust out the table to contain them all

Regions Defended: 116

The Geofs Region Unregion The Galactic Senate Eglintonian Test Region Areus Vhrshtr Zaire Kongo Byzantine Christendom United Allies Of Tamulte Artillery Trowd Puppet Storage The Pacificia Union Holy Kingdom Brazilian Empire Trampoline Park Abstained Earthen Region Of Federations Fortefinia Indoeternity Chiron The Black Hole Of Socorro The Buhbland Alliance Western Fields Waida Atlantic Arctic Skunthar V Virginia Beach Cyber City Scared Of Paul Mccartney

Phules Paradise Irish Free State Holy Simana Union Of Russia Russian Region Realm Of General David Laguna Montrandecs Neighbours Aboard Terra Nova Prima Signa Libertatis The Best Sectors The Neo Greater Union United Nations Of The World Catholic State Support People Pencil Sharpener White Boy Summer Articia Vuvuzela Iron Pact The Union Of Colonia Rasines Correctional The Commonwealth Of Nations Abbreviating The Great Milky Way United Syndicalist Workers Front Hyrulian Nations League Federation Argenmenia Valyrn

Mylktopia The United States Of Waldos World West Civilization Golden Union Er E The Council Of Wires Orlean Association Of The Countries Of The Free United Front Of Dionastain 7 Rings Of Hell Waffle House United Nations Of Nationstates Sus Amoungus Accommodates The Sovietunion The Western Black Sea Elcor The Land Of Bird And Honey Refugees Welcome Lily Bad Army Squad Tzarshtadd Pact The Nation States Mittles Fuerdo Has Children Sca Empire Greater Middle East Cold War Organization Of Central Indiana Counties Coral Reef 6 The Shiny Place

The Region Name The Communist Commonwealth Of Jinensia The Right Capitalist Union Federation Of Andom Risenland Treaty Of Larisburgo Altland Sania Anti Communist Initiative Region Of Ourple 4th International Socialist Union The United Nations Of Esnal Absurdities The Grand Citadel The Grand British Union Nft Seashore 3 Accommodation Duuloc Legion And Basterds And Others The Western Havonian Empire Bredane Holy Catholic Crusader League Gradula Ascensionsen Northeast Atlantic Frux Bjkb North Nashua Colonial Society

---

Vigilant Wardens Experiencing Victory

First Warden Grea Kriopia
Chamberlain Luca
Commander Haku
Commander Tim
Constable Nakari
Lieutenant Quebecshire
Lieutenant Sulenia
Warden Varax

Indomitable Allies In Success

ERN Writinglegend
LDF/SB New Makasta
LDF Paleocacher
THA/EPSA Andusre
SPSF Humansanity

---

[Honeydewistania]

The Grey Wardens

[Bendicion]

~Ben was there o/

[Quebecshire]

God that shit was fun. Looking forward to being back and absolutely dominating raiders again.

[Duncan]

Amazing work, Wardens!

[Grea Kriopia]

100+ wins all in a night's work, can't wait to do it again

[The Chariot]

100+ wins all in a night's work, can't wait to do it again

How many losses though?

[Refuge Isle]

100+ wins all in a night's work, can't wait to do it again

How many losses though?

For that report? Like three?

[Chingis]

For that report? Like three?

Thanks Refuge, very nice.

[Varanius]

Can't wait to chase with you guys again soon!

[RiderSyl]

Can't wait to chase with you guys again soon!

Vara I hope this is a shitpost because you're scaring me

[Quebecshire]

Can't wait to chase with you guys again soon!

Vara I hope this is a shitpost because you're scaring me

It's probably not, Vara has been a regular (and quite skilled, at that) chaser lately.

[Refuge Isle]

Lucabaduka hitting delegate in Touch Grass, cir. 2022

It was three strokes after midnight.

Senior assistant regional branch assassin to the manager assassin Josh "R4Z0r bl4adE" Assassin stood in the dim misty twilight, the cool wind in his hair. The breeze rippled through his freshly tailored dark purple cloak. Its velvet was too thin, but still within his allowance budget for last October when he visited Spirit Halloween. He looked at his Brothers, assembled in various cool poses throughout the middle school parking lot. They had just finished a raid, the greatest raid of their lives in fact, Elite Warriors, proving once and for all that the shadow cabal was able to take on the strongest that the world had to offer.

He took out his earbuds, relishing the last few notes of "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" by Green Day. Smirking to himself, he pulled out his purple-tinted 2x Walmart binoculars (with a spooky skeleton sticker) to survey the total carnage of the eve'. Among the glint of Warden steel, the region appeared to be a dead and withered wasteland, but no more so than before.

Quoth the edgelord: "Bananas! It was defended!" Clearly these petty do-gooders would need to be taught a lesson by the forces of darkness. The black tides of the night cannot be stopped. Just as the sun allows for shadows to form, so the warden ARROGANCE from this defence would cast a shadow over all of the world, allowing the darkly forces of darkness to strike! In his anger, he flicked his arm to bring out his hidden blade, which clattered to the ground. He darkly picked it back up, using his cloak of shadows to obfuscate the situation as the manager assassin had taught him.

He held out his R4Z0r blade. "Mehrunes' R4Z0r? More like mmmmmmnjosh's R4Z0r. Ever heard of it?" That was something else the manager had said. He didn't know the manager assassin's name, but he assumed it was Chad. Anyways...he looked over at his one of his friends from Osiris, a skeleton who hadn't moved in years, far spookier than any sticker. "What's our next target, Carl?"

Quoth the skeleton: "ctkctkckctktkcktkcktktktkcktk", as Josh puppeteer the skeleton's jaws up and down. It was a skeleton he got from Party City and he was really happy he bought Carl, even if Carl had been stored in the attic most of the year.

"Right, the Land of Cakes Biscuits and Tea it is," said Josh, slipping through the darkness. Reemerging in the shadows at the region's entry, only the light reflecting off his hidden blade and dripping with green nickelodeon slime could be seen. He pulled on the gate's door, which rattled unsatisfactorily. "Nooo, how could this happen!"

"Sorry, we're closed for the day," said Warden-Commander Haku, putting away the delegate keys on the region's unreachable cookie shelf.

"Curse that cookie shelf!" said Josh, who had seen it many times before. "They're always putting delegacies up there!" Indeed, it was a time for vengeance. If today was a day for Malice, he would have to reach levels of darkness never before seen. For Chad, for Carl, for everyone. He flicked his other arm to bring out his second knife: the forbidden technique. He had dipped this one in black paint, although it was his school's water colour set and was already running a bit. "This paint won't be the only thing running tonight..."

The next target was Touch Grass, a place he had never been before. He leapt into the air, just like the box art of his games, he could hear the eagle scream in the distance. Or a barn owl like that one game had. But it was not to be. His cloak was too heavy, his back hurt from carrying raiderdom, he longed for the retirement he had returned from. As if the universe was out to get him, a nearly magnetic force adjusted his course and pushed him away from the region. He was unable to make contact with the grass. "Nani??" he exclaimed aloud.

His phone rang, the sonorous tones of Amy Lee singing the first few notes of "Bring Me To Life", he flicked his arm, his Motorola R4Z0r clattered to the ground. "Shucks Howdy!" he exclaimed aloud. He quickly picked it up. It was mom. Ugh. Not now.

"Moooom. I'm in a raid. For the last time! I can't pAUSE IT!"

"Well are ya winnin' son?"

"I was aBOUT to until you CALLED. I was aBOUT to deliver the killing blow to the defender menace!"

"That's nice Joshua..." said Pamela uneasily.

"I told you to only call me 'R4Z0r bl4dE' when I'm out with my friends!"

"Joshua, it just takes so long to say 'are four zed zero ar'...."

"It's R4Z0r!

"Okay, razor, anyway hurry home when you're done. I made your favourite."

"Spaghetti??", She was right. It was his favourite. "Alright . . . Be home soon . . . " He flicked his phone closed, ending the call like the night ends the day. His phone rang again.

"Now don't you hang up without saying goodbye!" said Pamela empowered by free nights and weekends.

"Fine . . . goodbye mom . . ." said the shadow master, who had a doctorate in destruction from the shadow realm community college. "Love you . . . " he muttered and then flicked his phone closed like a badass.

Finally, it was time to sound the keening death knell for the defender blight. He called upon his ultimate power: So Much Fucking Doom Jutsu. Dark clouds began converging to cover the sky and Josh cackled manically as his final plan was set in motion. As the grimdark powers of shadow enveloped him, the final target came into sight -- the sprawling metropolis of Please do not raid me. Little did they know, that was exactly what they were gonna do. Heh. He jumped into the air and stomped with both feet, causing two more knives to extend from the tips of his boots from Hot Topic. "Heck yeah," he said, they had a giant spider on the side and everything.

"R4z0r, terrible news. The defenders are already here," said field marshal lieutenant assassin Chad "Assassin" Chadington. He had been promoted since they last met.

"Impoooosssible!" exclaimed Josh, who forgot to move, aloud. "It can't be! I just got my knives out!"

Even if everything else had gone wrong tonight, he had the spaghetti to look forward to.

Defender Menace:

First Warden Grea Kriopia
Chamberlain Luca
Warden-Commander Haku
Warden-Lieutenant Quebecshire
Warden-Lieutenant Sulenia
Silverite Guardian Eshialand
Warden Ike
Warden Varax
Warden Wolflandil

Cookies Shelved: 21

Elite Warriors
Dont Join Pls
Gentlemen Club
Buzzistan
Strand
Lazarus Mint
Arsenal Fc
Authoritarian Safe Space
The Land Of Cakes Biscuits And Tea
Ndi
Gunnropa
Fixolasbasiquex
Oemm
The Gayish Economic Zone
Abolition
Safety
Anti Panda
Yuno
Big Boy Bulgaria League
Why Do You Write
Please Do Not Raid Me

[Tim-Opolis]

Top 3 Reports All Time, I love you for bringing this to the world Luca

[Roavin]

I love this report.

I love the delegacies pun. It had me laughing out loud.

I hate how much this reminds me of when I was a teenager.

[Carl the Skeleton]

He held out his R4Z0r blade. "Mehrunes' R4Z0r? More like mmmmmmnjosh's R4Z0r. Ever heard of it?" That was something else the manager had said. He didn't know the manager assassin's name, but he assumed it was Chad. Anyways...he looked over at his one of his friends from Osiris, a skeleton who hadn't moved in years, far spookier than any sticker. "What's our next target, Carl?"

Quoth the skeleton: "ctkctkckctktkcktkcktktktkcktk", as Josh puppeteer the skeleton's jaws up and down. It was a skeleton he got from Party City and he was really happy he bought Carl, even if Carl had been stored in the attic most of the year.

rattles bones

Wonderful report, Luca!

[Minskiev]

The best. I love the way you write, Luca, please write more of everything ever.

[Grea Kriopia]

Libcord's Chasers Prepparing for a Record-Breaking Evening

New Overall and Single Team Defense Record

A quick confession - We actually broke the single team/overall record last Friday with 149 defenses, but there was no report for it because we knew we could do better. Waste Steven promised us we'd have an opportunity to do better. When we saw prep for another Lily tag run this evening, we knew the time had come.

As the Wardens and their allies gathered for update, spirits were high yet tempered by the continuous updates of dozens of detags and defenses that had led up tonight. Groups like Brotherhood of Malice and the Black Hawks were training grounds, by comparison, to the speed of LILY.ai and the eternal Buzzy Bee on which Libcord chasers honed their skills. There could be no stumbling endos, no slow switches, and nothing less than the maximum speed pageloads could allow.

Update began and for the hour and half long major update 13 chasers, same as the previous record, battled it out against the LILY.ai, sprinting from region to region with barely a moment's rest before being on the move once again. Despite typical lag at the start of update, Libcord's A-game team ended up with 177 defenses out of 236 jumps in an even 75% win rate with LILY.ai netting a mere 13 hits when all was said and done. 177 defenses blows the previous 149 from last week out of the water and the one before that (112, give or take), and yet...there is always more. As Libcord's next generation chasers only improve, we know there can only be more speed and more wins for ceilingless records we'll break time and time again

Next stop: 200+

(If it seems really long, it's because it is)

Regions Defended: 177
A Ghost Town
The Allied Nations Of The Right Wing
Schoenplatz
Areus
Oceania Region
The Galactic Senate
Ballin
Chiron
Melodia
Fnr Card Trading Farm
The Greater Imperial Realm
Fortefinia
The Poors
Olgea
The Vastara System
Birdland
Absentmindedly
Somewhere Out There
Imperialism Is The Way
Epic People United
Mars7
Government Of The Antarctic Empire
Coalition Of Freedom
Fluffy Squishfish
The Union Of Espaerian States
Gerald
The Lantesian League
British Imperial Commonwealth
Greater Middle Earth
Kenchaylest
Perunia
The Quintesian Dependancies
The Dragon Bowl
Cyber City
Agfyuwgyfuwyfuahw
Koenigreich Deutschland
United Federation Of New Nebulus
Iron Front
Druids
Phules Paradise
Laguna
Frese States
Realm Of General David
Otherworld
Alcatraz
Unified States Of Peace
Bargain
Norahem
United Ujung Front
Oceanic Pacific Confederation Opc
Cube
Snapchat
Absorbent
The Amberite Isles
Lnf Government Offices
A Pirate Ship
Icelandic Empire
Wilburia
United Nations Of The World
Micomet Region
The Empire Of All French
Little Chibun
New Deutschland
Acceptances
Bison Islands
The Downside
Futuro
Valyrn
Canadia Ex
Abrogated
Holy Russian Empire
Rectica Backup 2
The Grand New Republic
Aeveum Illuminationis
Community Of Individuals
Reihkossan
The Great Nations
England Is My City
Rectica
Target Region 21
The Weastern Block
Libertasia
Gamer Paradise
Magna Basileia
The Adorable
The Fangirls
Skateboards
Holy Lusophone Empire
The Free Territories
Komynisty
The Protectorate Of Emperor Sean 1511
West Civilization
Girls0frontline0x0crysis
Sovereign States
Katzen
Coalition Of The Supreme States
Ponies Of The Apocalypse
The United Coalition
The Tar Pits
United Nations Of Nationstates
Combine Overworld
Fuerdo Has Children
Colonized Modk
Chessboard

(Yeah, it keeps going)

Army Squad
Nationstates Museum Of Art
The Fowler Force
Oozi Area
Kongedakru
Ctsn
Abrasive
Heriop Regime
Ultimate Environmentalists Club
Asrina
The Hyphenistans
The Meat Grinder
Jenkins Prime
West European Schools
The Doomsday Legion
Coffee House
Bay Of Plenty
Accolades
Rulers Of Earth
Unirea Popoarelor Marii
Spices
Germanys Finest
Absorber
Cat Storage
States Of Ninjago
States Of Matter
Essay
Thuisland
Scarfaces
Planetary Galactic Governments Assembly
North Nashua Colonial Society
Nomadic Cultures Of Steppe
League Solar
Abattoirs
Absoluteness
Jjjjjjjjjjjj
Seigefield
Unification Of Slavic Countries
United Soviet Federation
Cactus Creek Community
Supraregional Humanists Of The World
Meep
Unitarian Union
Economic Union Of Thriving States
Ably
Accommodation
Beljiotena
Seashore 3
The Confederacy Of Cooperative States
Peekaboo
The Free Alliance
Black Sea Islands
The New World Of Name
Y E S
The Boys Llc
Absurdities
The Steppes
4th International Socialist Union
Academic
Big Farma
South Central Saskatchewan
The United Peace
The Free Alliance Of Aldorria
Tv Valley
Steam Punk
The Royal Sovereign Alliance
Indian Mars
Region Of Ships Bigger Than The Galaxy
Avia
Thr Embassy
The United States Armed Forces
The Union Of Liberation
Jandanavia

---

Record-Setting Wardens

First Warden Grea Kriopia
Chamberlain Luca
Commander Haku
Commander Tim
Commander Vincent Drake
Lieutenant Quebecshire
Lieutenant Sulenia

Unrivaled Allies

ERN Writinglegend
[LDF/SB] New Makasta
[LDF] DinoNet
[LDF] Paleocacher
[SB] United Sovereign Alliance
[SPSF] Pronoun

---

[West Barack and East Obama]

Big Farma

Are The Grey Wardens working for the cards elite now?

[Onionist Randosia]

That… is a lot of defenses. I bet your mouses were nearly broken by the end of that.

[Merni]

That… is a lot of defenses. I bet your mouses were nearly broken by the end of that.

You don't use your mouse much in chasing (unless you're doing it without any keybind scripts).

[Onionist Randosia]

That… is a lot of defenses. I bet your mouses were nearly broken by the end of that.

You don't use your mouse much in chasing (unless you're doing it without any keybind scripts).

or the key you have bound to the ‘endorse’ button.