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International Baseball Slam XVI EVERYTHING Thread

A battle ground for the sportsmen and women of nations worldwide. [In character]

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Kriegiersien
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Founded: Jul 07, 2010
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Kriegiersien » Sun Mar 20, 2022 10:30 am

The pirates were all repairing fishing nets.

Pops was fiddling with a needle and the net.
“So, what do ya think about this Corsairs from Segeltorp? Some other bunch of Pirates. Have never seen them on the sea”, asked Bob.

“The sea is mighty big. Did ye hear from Bert the Black and his Cannibal crew?”

“No?”

“Big bad Pirate in the South Sea. What is much closer than Segeltorp. But never met them. And I am happy about that.”

“Did ye know that Segel is old Kriegersien speak for sail?”

“No, but do ye know why we arrr repairing the net? I am not fishing not.”

“To catch other people’s with it.”

“Arrr, thats sounds better”, laughed Nappo.

“Maybe if ye would catch some more balls in the game, that would help us.”

“I only missed one.”

“And dropped one.”
Nappo lifted his needle as if he wanted to start a duel.

“Ok, stop yer hard work and listen, ye scum!”
Cherry suddenly was on deck, with a baseball bat and a bag.

“Enough of repairing the nets. We are now doing something for baseball. Only 4 teams are left and I want to get into the final. We are not letting us steal the trophy from some fake pirates! Am I right?”, she shouted.

Everyone was cheering and just all to happy to play baseball instead of tinker with a shabby fisher net.

“Are the baseballs in the big bag?”, asked Macy.

“Oh no. This bag is for Aslak Torp.”

Everyone looked confused.

“Who?”

“That is the guy behind the whole team from Segeltorp, ya gits. Theirs captain. I distract him, Pops puts the bag over his head, knocks him out and we make him totally drunk and abandon him on a bench far away with a further bottle and a gum. Then he is gone until the game starts. Without him, these tennis players are lost.”

“And ye think that works?”

“At least we can nobble someone and have fun with rum and violence”, said Macy.
Some others nodded now and grinned.

“Yeah, I like it.”
“Sneaky.”
“Some more action.”
“Fightin and stealin!”

“Idiots, Idiots!”, cawed Prof.

“The parrot stays here”, decided Cherry.
Last edited by Kriegiersien on Mon Mar 21, 2022 5:06 am, edited 4 times in total.

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Gnejs
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Founded: May 11, 2006
Left-wing Utopia

Postby Gnejs » Mon Mar 21, 2022 2:55 am

Yo ho! Blast that buggerin' puffy shirt!

Crisis. It was the night before the biggest game in the Association’s career and their leader was missing. Their coach, their association president, their starting pitcher, their primus motor. Aslak was nowhere to be seen.

He hadn’t shown up for breakfast. That didn’t raise much concern; some people like to sleep in, and god knows he deserved it. When he didn’t show up for morning practice, however, some of the Corsairs started getting a little fidgety. Especially Johannes, because he was supposed to be the replacement pitcher. Sure, he’d practiced with Aslak for hours upon hours, but he never actually thought he’d be pitching in a game. When he missed lunch, that’s when things really started boiling. Breakfast is one thing, but lunch is a proper meal, and the Association always had their meals together. That was their thing. And it was Aslak who had insisted upon it. Eating together was a big part of achieving the sort of group cohesion needed to succeed, he always said. He’d learned that from his time with a guerrilla movement somewhere south, and you couldn’t argue with the results.

Lisa and Lars had tried to reassure the rest of the team, and told them they’d find Aslak. He was probably just trying to get into game-mode. Playing a semifinal was a big deal, and a lot depended upon him. Maybe he just needed a few hours for himself. It could be that he was doing that meditation routine he picked up the on that hill down in Terramidia. But they never did find him. They checked all the places they could think of, but Aslak was still nowhere to be seen.

Now it was dinner time. Everybody had already finished their bruschettas, and the lamb korma would arrive any minute now. This was the time when Aslak was supposed to stand up and give his pre-game speech. But his chair was empty, and you could cut the tension in the room with a knife. It wasn’t just that he was missing, it was that he was missing right when they were about to go up against the Buccaneer Pirates of Kriegiersien. Because unlike ‘The Corsairs’, these ‘Pirates’ were actual pirates. And pirates were scary. It was worst for Jerry, of course, who had that traumatic experience with his cat. But any sane Union citizen growing up on the coast had a healthy dose of fear and loathing for the scourge of the sea. It wasn’t that pirates were common in Union territorial waters, because they weren’t. But that doesn’t mean they couldn’t be.

Lisa and Lars exchanged glances and Lars nodded to Lisa. She got up and clinked her glass, like Aslak used to do. She cleared her throat.

“Ok, everyone. I know we’re all thinking the same thing: Aslak’s not here. And I know there are rumors that the Buccaneer Pirates has kidnapped and fed him to that parrot of theirs. Let me just say there’s no proff whatsoever for any of that happening. Now, me and Lars still don’t know where he is, but I’m sure he’s fine.”

She paused and took in how this resonated with the group. Poorly, it would seem. They all looked even paler now than before. Maybe some of them hadn’t heard that ridiculous rumor after all. She continued.

“A semifinal is a big deal, yes. And The Pirates are a strong team. But this doesn’t mean anything. We just need to play our own game. Same we’ve done every day so far. We’re undefeated, remember that. We’re a strong team.”

A hand was raised. It was Nikolaj, one of the tennis people. Lisa nodded to him. He stood up and cleared his throat. And then he started screaming.

“We’re all gonna die!! The pirates are gonna chop us up into tiny pieces and fed us to the mackerels!”

Two thirds of the group followed his lead and starting breaking down in tears. Maybe it was the pressure of competing at this level for so long, maybe it was a genuine fear of pirates. Hard to tell. Either way, Lisa was stunned and left speechless. She looked over at Lars, but he just shook his head. “I’m losing them,” Lisa thought to herself. Then, suddenly a shout came from the very back of the group. It was Klaus Selje, the old infielder, who had raised his voice to demand silence. Now he hobbled to the front of the table on his peg leg and motioned for Lisa to sit down. He adjusted his eyepatch and spoke in a low growl

“Compose yerself mateys. Let me tell ye what I learned from sailin' the seas fer many years. A crew o' gentleman o' fortune like these buccaneers needs to be moored real jolly an' yer tears will brin' nothin' but salivatin' mouths aboard that there galley o' theirs.”

The group sat in silence, captivated by the old insurance salesman. Klaus removed his tricorn hat and dabbed his forehead with a napkin before continuing.

“Them sea monkeys only adhere t’ thar owns speak. Ye got t' grab 'em by the sails 'n give 'em a paddlin' straight t' Davy Jones' locker. Ye grab yer bats an' ye 'it 'ard. An' if they act up on ye, ye give them aft tenfolds. We’ll dine on parrot come tomorrow night, or we will go out blazin' tryin'!”

Silence filled the room. Then Jerry got up and started clapping his hands. Birgitte and Jakob followed, and soon the entire Segeltorp Association of Friends were on their feet. Lisa looked at Lars, and he nodded. They had found their new leader for the upcoming game. It wasn’t the leader they had expected, but it was the leader they needed.

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Zaambate Te Ahaa
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Ex-Nation

Postby Zaambate Te Ahaa » Mon Mar 21, 2022 5:45 am

... After a moment heads were raised again, and Drazhaan's smile eschewed all solemnity. "Niki does not bed at Autumn time, as other gods make preparation for, but instead she is always watching over the sportsman to crown him with victory. It is this reason why I urge all citizens, tomorrow at 10PM to tune their radios and televisions to the Sports Channel for the Semi-Finals of the International Baseball Slam. Our own team, the Aháàng Excellencies, have been crowned thus far by Niki as worthy to have gone this far. Let us pray to Niki, now, that the Excellencies will carry her flame to the victor's circle, all glory to Niki."

Silence, and then again, smiles. "Soon, the natural way of the Aháâng will be full glory again...


What pressure! Being mentioned at length by the new king of the nation in the big Equinox Address. But worse yet than that, the pressure was already on the Aháàng Excellencies, who were holding a volunteer Mábõ service in the local park, near the Onyx Center. They lit incense and prayed, but most abstained from drinking the libations, as their heads needed clarity for tomorrow's game, and it was hard enough to find a decent amount of Autumnal Wine on such short notice as it was.

"We give all glory to far flying and victorious Niki, who grants the laural wreath upon the brow of the champion, and who sponsors those most dramatic of games." 'All glory', came the call back from players, family, friends and others interested assembled. It was Ari Nadir who gave the prayer as the smoke from incense and barbecued meats and vegetables climbed to heaven. "Niki, whos wisdom and conference is worth all praise." 'All praise', comes the response.

"All honor to Niki who will favor the most worthy with her blessed victory." 'All honor' came the response. "You may now pray individually." And so they all did, most to the goddess Niki, believing only her capable of bestowing final victory in the game tomorrow. Tension, anxiety was high in the air and all around, but by the end of the prayer their confidence was renewed. Tomorrow they played the semifinals, and it determined whether or not they advanced, whether or not their families had flown to Adaikes to support them in vain, and whether their stay was up or not. Regardless, all was smiles as the event carried on, and if anyone was particularly anxious or perturbed, it was certain no one brought it up. The barbecue was simply that good.

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United Adaikes
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Founded: Feb 11, 2018
Democratic Socialists

Postby United Adaikes » Mon Mar 21, 2022 5:13 pm

Semifinals Cutoff



(B1) MCC Cricketers 2-4 (A4) The Aháàng Excellencies

(A1) Segeltorp Association of Friends - 'The Corsairs' 5-4 (C1) Buccaneer Pirates



3rd Place Playoff
March 23, 2022

Pioneer Stadium

(C1) Buccaneer Pirates vs. (B1) MCC Cricketers

Championship Game
March 24, 2022

Millenium Stadium

(A1) Segeltorp Association of Friends - 'The Corsairs' vs. (A4) The Aháàng Excellencies

(IC Game Time: 6 PM)
Last edited by United Adaikes on Mon Mar 21, 2022 5:21 pm, edited 1 time in total.
The West Pacific native
Commander of The West Pacific Armed Forces
Former Guardian
Former Deputy Minister of Foreign Affairs
Former Deputy Minister of WAR

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Kriegiersien
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Founded: Jul 07, 2010
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Kriegiersien » Mon Mar 21, 2022 7:05 pm

Scorpion City Gazette


Kriegiersien Buccaneers lose semi-final against Segeltorp ‘Corsairs’ with 4-5 at the IBC XVI in duel of the Pirates.



The interview with pitcher Macy ended also not so well for our reporter.

After asking friendly why the Bucs as representative of the nation with the Olympic champion weren’t able to beat some amateurs who just began playing baseball and had to play without their manager who had vanished mysteriously before the match, he got immediately headbutted by the pitcher of the Kriegiersien team.
Image


The interview with Captain Cherry worked better.

She kindly assured that the team would give everything now in the match for the third place against the MCC Cricketers, after they had heard that a medal placement in a competition would bring them “lots of money” from the government.
Image

Let’s just hope that cricket players are easier to beat than tennis players for our Pirates.

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Gnejs
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Founded: May 11, 2006
Left-wing Utopia

Postby Gnejs » Wed Mar 23, 2022 1:29 am

The Port Kejm Sentinel

Sports - Baseball


Segeltorp Association of Friends fight for International Baseball Slam trophy as government prepares to proclaim ‘The Summer of Baseball’
By: Ken Skokel, baseball correspondent

The unthinkable has happened. I’m not talking about the Segeltorp Association of Friends beating, or batting, or whatever it’s called, their way to the final championship game of the International Baseball Slam. Don’t get me wrong, a Union team doing something like that is indeed most unthinkable. But no, I’m talking about what’s happening back home, here in our cities, towns and hamlets.

Because something is rotten in the Union. There are cracks in the very foundation of The Rock, and corruption and decay have gained entry. In other words: there’s a drive towards making ‘baseball’ a Union game. It’s horrid, I know. The worst thing about it, if you ask me, is that it’s all done so openly. I have it straight from a Meridian Quarter press liaison that the Ministry of Culture, Sports and other Charitable Activities (MCSCA) is preparing to roll out a grand campaign of ‘Baseball Awareness’. Apparently, the goal is to introduce this devil’s game to us citizens of the Union en masse. They’re still keeping the details of the plan to themselves, but I foresee extravagant waste of tax money in a convoluted scheme to stomp out the last shred of decency still lingering in this once proud sport nation.

And it’s not only the government. The fourth estate is also jumping on this wagon of retched opportunism, with every paper from The Esaias Inquisitor in the south to the Finntorp Daily Worker in the north devoting precious space to detailing the escapades of these ‘Corsairs’ and “enlightening” the populace about what is haphazardly being framed as a new potential ‘national pastime’. The uncouthness of it.

Once a prominent bearer of tradition, I am sad to say even The Port Kejm Sentinel itself has succumbed to this ‘baseball fever’ infecting the nation. That’s right. As of today I am writing to you from the ‘Baseball Section’ of the sports pages. While I still retain the freedom to dictate my own content, I no longer hold sway over what position I occupy, and from this day my official job title is baseball correspondent.

I want to fight it. I want to stand up against madness and give the cynical and unscrupulous establishment a smack in the face. But who am I fighting for anymore? That’s right. I’ve seen the latest polls. The disease seems to be too far along and beyond remedying.

I guess all that’s left to do is wishing the Segeltorp Association of Friends “good luck” in their upcoming championship game. Congratulations. No matter the outcome, you have surely succeeded in destroying our nation’s soul.

Results of the latest poll
Image


Our other top sports stories:

Heraklit, Granit and Oxwald all through to the second round of the Electrum Slam.

Dandelions hailed as heroes upon return from rough inaugural Copa Rushmori

Curious about baseball? Read our beginners guide.

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United Adaikes
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Founded: Feb 11, 2018
Democratic Socialists

Postby United Adaikes » Wed Mar 23, 2022 8:00 pm

3rd Place Playoff Cutoff



Pioneer Stadium
(C1) Buccaneer Pirates 4-2 (B1) MCC Cricketers

Congratulations to the winners and commiserations to the team who lost.
Last edited by United Adaikes on Wed Mar 23, 2022 8:05 pm, edited 2 times in total.
The West Pacific native
Commander of The West Pacific Armed Forces
Former Guardian
Former Deputy Minister of Foreign Affairs
Former Deputy Minister of WAR

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Zaambate Te Ahaa
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Founded: Feb 16, 2022
Ex-Nation

Postby Zaambate Te Ahaa » Wed Mar 23, 2022 8:06 pm

Cameras circle the empty seats at Milennium park, fading over the stadium and only barely displaying two figures standing below on the diamond. After a few moments and a few different shots set to the tune of a jovial march, the cameras who zoom in and slow down on those two figures, and as the music faded into the final shot, one of them began to speak. "Faxala hòna sports fans, I am Tíusepo, and if you don't know me, soon you will love me. Speaking of loving men we don't know, sir, tell us all now, what is your name?"

"I am Jafir al Razid," Jafir began. He steps forward, smiling and hand raised as he begins to address the camera. "And I am here with my friend Tíu here to let everyone know that tomorrow's game will not be something for the faint of heart."

"And that you won't miss it if you're smart. Young Jafir here is leading the Aháàng Excellencies in hits, runs, and scores, and he will be leading them right here to Milennium Park, back where it all started." Tíusepo gesticulated wildly, and Jafir just smiled and shook his head. "Here, so long ago, the Excellencies already faced off against the Segeltorp Association of Friends, did they not?"

"Yes, this is true, Tíu," Jafir's smile turned coy. "And it is true, when last we faced the Corsairs, they defeated us fairly."

"It was fair, but not ovrwhelming. 3-1 is decisive, but not insurmountable." Tíu nodded as he spoke, goading Jafir to go on.

"Well, it has all been quite strange. In the qualifiers, we would lose, then win, then lose, then win... Barsim said it was what we were due. He said our due was up after the Round of 16, but then we just kept on winning against even our own expectations. It was... It is like a dream." Jafir looked into the distance, fixing his hat. "My girlfriend is here, and my family too. So are most of the other men's families. Mine came out for the Quarterfinals and will be here for the finals."

"One last thing, before I leave, for the Corsairs." Jafir points into the camera. "It is as Sun Tzu said, that now we know our enemy, and now we may claim victory. It will not be so easy for you this time. But, no matter who wins the Championship, we extend our offer, all the Excellencies, to join us at the nearest pub post game where we will be signing autographs. If you should join us, Corsairs, no matter who is victor, we will buy the first two rounds of drinks, as well. We would all be honored to join in on an Association of Friends."

"Well, there you have it folks. Tune in tomorrow night and join us back here in Millennium Park, right where it all started and right where it will end. The Championship of the Underdogs, Aháàng Excellencies against The Segeltorp Association of Friends' Corsairs, the amateurs against the Olympians, the novelty against the oddity, the baseball newbies against the tennis champs. It's hot, its tomorrow at 6pm EDT and thats 10PM Aháà time so make sure to grab your waker uppers, and it's all for the gold, baby!"

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United Adaikes
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Posts: 331
Founded: Feb 11, 2018
Democratic Socialists

Postby United Adaikes » Thu Mar 24, 2022 5:01 pm

Championship Game Cutoff



Millenium Stadium
(A1) Segeltorp Association of Friends - 'The Corsairs' 5-3 (A4) The Aháàng Excellencies

Congratulations to the winners and commiserations to the team who lost.
Last edited by United Adaikes on Thu Mar 24, 2022 5:06 pm, edited 1 time in total.
The West Pacific native
Commander of The West Pacific Armed Forces
Former Guardian
Former Deputy Minister of Foreign Affairs
Former Deputy Minister of WAR

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Gnejs
Minister
 
Posts: 3385
Founded: May 11, 2006
Left-wing Utopia

Postby Gnejs » Thu Mar 31, 2022 11:18 am

The Bond of Friendship and The Summer of Baseball

It was all over. The bell tolls and the game comes to a close. They had done it. No one, least of all themselves, had believed this being a real possibility; The Segeltorp Association of Friends ending up as the winners of the International Baseball Slam. But against all odds and expectations, they had triumphed against The Aháàng Excellencies in the championship game. They all stood in shock for a while, and then the celebrations bursted forth. Hugs and kisses and tears. Even the peg-legged insurance salesman Klaus got a little moist around the eyes.

The Excellencies were as graceful in defeat as they had been all throughout the Slam, and they were the first to step up and congratulate the Segeltorp friends and remind them of the offer to join in celebrations at the nearest pub. And so they did. Lisa and Lars, Jerry and Klaus, Birgitte and the rest of the tennis crew. They all sat down and cheered and laughed with their opponents, who now were more like friends.

Jafir al Razid asked Lisa and Lars if they ever found out what happened to Aslak, the star pitcher, manager and president of the friendship association. “We’re not sure,” Lisa said. “But we know he’s alright, he’s let us know that much,” Lars continued. Jafir nodded in silence.

The night dragged on, and it seemed like no one wanted it to end. After a while Lars stood up and cleared his throat. “There’s a tradition in the Union,” he said. “It’s called the Rock of Friendship. It bonds one together in Friendship. It is absolute. The Prosaic Union itself has handed out very few Rocks of Friendship to other nations, and rightly so. Because one does not enter into a bond of Friendship lightly. Jafir, on behalf of the entire team, we offer you, The Aháàng Excellencies, this Rock and our eternal Friendship.” Lars handed Jafir a small piece of quartz granite and bowed.

Late summer, 2022, Segeltorp, north coast of Gnejs

It was a late night. The summer sun had not yet set and Sailor’s Park was washed in evening rays. Amongst a few others on a set of improvised bleachers, Aslak Torp sat and watched as young children laughed and played a game of baseball. He was proud of what his friends had achieved down at the Slam. But this was the trophy he had fought for.

And thus ended the origin saga of Gnejsian baseball.

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