The Grey Wardens: Warden-Lieutenant Eshialand

by **Altmoras** » Fri Dec 03, 2021 5:59 pm

Thanks to Sarah for her six months of excellent service in helping us break into the top 25 largest delegates in the game :clap:

Here's to breaking 100 endorsements with Ara.

by **Altmoras** » Sat Dec 04, 2021 12:00 am

A Woke Comrade of Libcord deftly wards off two opponents at once.

Tonight was a busy night for The Grey Wardens and our friends in Libcord (For Your Protection), as not one but two groups of independent taggers came out to play this Friday Major. In the days of yore defenders would oftentimes be forced to pick and choose which group to chase when multiple were on the field, but we've levelled up a bit since then so we decided to strap in and handle both Lily and the ERN at the same time. A mixed group of LDF, SPSF, and TGW deftly held back ERN taggers out of Crystal Falls, almost achieving a shutout but sadly falling short of that when the ERN acquiesced to defeat in open battle and played possum to sneak a win later into update as boredom set in at their inaction. Meanwhile the all Grey Warden zero second chase squad smelled the lilies and dashed off after them in pursuit. Despite Lily receiving mid-update reinforcements from the North Pacific Army and multiple Wardens pausing to prep puppets they still couldn't get the better of us as we decisively defeated them 101-26, just short of an 80% winrate. Lily too, weren't fast enough to defeat the ever-expanding elite corps of Grey Wardens capable of chasing Darkspawn wherever they may run in under one second. It was a good time though, always fun when Sweeze comes out of cryo.

Wardens Involved
First Warden Grea Kriopia
Chamberlain Haku
Commander Altmoras
Commander Tim
Commander Vincent Drake
Constable Luca
Senior Warden Eshialand
Warden Rom

Allies About
[LDF] New Makasta
[SPSF] HumanSanity
[SPSF] Qawe (Got their first chase win today!)

Regions Defended: 104

by **Grea Kriopia** » Sat Dec 04, 2021 9:37 am

So nice to take the training wheels off and go fast again

by **Haku** » Sat Dec 04, 2021 7:54 pm

Absolutely insane that we can defend more regions in a single update than raiders can raid in a week.

by **Grea Kriopia** » Sun Dec 05, 2021 1:45 pm

Prime Minister HumanSanity ready to greet the day while First Warden Grea Kriopia finally gets up.

The Grey Wardens and our Libcord allies pride ourselves in being ready to defend at all hours of the day, but I feel like it's fairly well accepted that minor update sucks. It's so early, I'd rather still be in bed, and minor generally has smaller updater turnouts for both sides. Why can't we all just go back to sleep?

Nonetheless, I and many others dragged ourselves to consciousness after being alerted of the Lily menace at minor update. We chasers are nothing if not consistent, chugging down some coffee and adrenaline to hop on the flowery chasing trail and knock out yet another high-win update. A Lily tagging group is always a formidable opponent (or at least more formidable than their raider peers) and snuck some solid late update wins, but alas it was not enough in the face of sheer speed. Despite sleepy site lag on jumps and endos, the roused coalition of Wardens and defender allies earned their breakfast with another win rate just under 80% with a tasty final scoreboard of 72 wins to 22 hits. Always ready to go at a moments notice, neither minor nor major can stop the Libcord (For Your Protection) chasing stack.

Anyway, that's all, gg or something. Pls send coffee, thxs

Wide Awake Wardens
First Warden Grea Kriopia
Chamberlain Haku
Commander Sir Merlin
Commander Vincent Drake
Constable Luca
Lieutenant Moon

Alert Allies
[FRA/SPSF] W&S
[LDF] Christian Lindner
[RRA] Minskiev
[SPSF] HumanSanity
+ TITO

Regions Defended: 72

by **Altmoras** » Sun Dec 05, 2021 11:41 pm

Average Raider vs. Average Grey Warden

Two reports in one day? When you win as much as the Grey Wardens it happens more often than you'd think. Tonight the Grey Wardens and our friends in Libcord (For Your Protection) faced off against a group of raiders with tenacity, stamina, activity, and spirit, which is another way of saying we didn't chase The Black Hawks. The Blanket Fort Legion were our prey tonight, and unfortunately for them, although not being TBH has a major positive correlation with not losing, there is no form of Darkspawn that can defeat the vigilant chasers of the Grey Wardens. Even with First Warden Grea Kriopia out being a party animal our line held with ease. Twenty times they moved without missing, and twenty times we defeated them, a perfect shutout. I don't really have much else to say about it other than I hope to see them on the field again sometime, 95% of the reason for this post was that I had the idea for the above meme and wanted to post it.

Wardens Present
Chamberlain Haku
Commander Altmoras
Constable Luca
Lieutenant Moon
Lieutenant Quebecshire
Senior Warden Eshialand
Warden Rom

Allies Around
[LDF] New Makasta
[LDF] Paleocacher
[lily] frenchy
[SPSF] Qawe

Defences: 20
Hierosolyma
Morris County
The Armed Force
The Namician Reich
States Of Ninjago
Clalacha Comunist Bloc
Er E
Verthandi
Nintendo Gamecube
Starry Nuggets
The Alliance Of Confusion
Islands Of Terror
Communist Assembly
Cope
The United States Of Moltisia
Intergalactic Sector Ab
Federation Epsilon Indi System
Coalition Of Domestically Aligned States
The Queen S House
Nationalistan

by **Refuge Isle** » Mon Dec 06, 2021 12:50 pm

A bad day chasing is already better than a good day doing anything else, but we've had some pretty good days chasing lately :blush:

by **Haganham** » Thu Dec 09, 2021 12:03 am

pillow fort seems pretty cozy ngl.

by **Grea Kriopia** » Sun Dec 12, 2021 1:19 am

Pulling off a good occupation attempt is like baking a fantastic cake. You could almost compare it to winning "Star Baker" on the Great British Bake Off who's holiday specials have filled most of my free time lately. To become a "Star Baker" you must demonstrate excellence in all criteria of baking, or in this case raiding. The cake must not only taste delicious but also represent technical skill and look enticing at the same time. Similarly, a raid must be executed flawlessly on top of passable technical skill and an appetizing/appealing theme. The competition is fierce and leaves little room for error on the battlefield of British, er...update baking.

Entering the tent on this season of The Great Update Bake Off was a group of staging raiders from Lone Wolves United who sought to try their luck at not three baking challenges, but four! In such an unusually ambitious group of raiders, the defenders watched with hungry stomachs and anticipation to see how the competition would develop. Would they live up to Mary Berry's "scrumptious" expectations?

Our baking contestants assembled in a flurry and set about the kitchen tent gathering ingredients to face their raiding challenge under the watchful eye of defenders. The baking clock clicked down lower and lower as time went on, each minute passing bringing the moment of truth as the end of update lurked closer and closer.

Finally, a call rang through the tent, "Time's up!" (also known as "GO") and the raiders lept to present their baking challenges and the results were...half baked, to put it kindly.

For the Signature Bake, the Lone Wolves busted out the classic recipe of an outright visible raiding stage, crossing on their lead before moving into the target of Random Acts of Kindness and The Helysian Chasm. The Signature challenge is intended to show the baker's tried-and-true classic recipes in top form, but sadly for our furry friends, they mismeasured the amount of flour needed in their two bakes and were vastly outnumbered by defenders, left with nothing but some sad and underbaked cake to show for their efforts.

Next up came the Technical Challenge meant to demonstrate technical knowledge and intuition in baking. Changing things up, Lone Wolves attempted to make up some clean stealth WA nations on the fly and sneak into their next target of Niaf in a higher level of raiding skill. It was not to be, though, as the wolves underestimated the technical planning required to make stealth nations inconspicuous to defender eyes and were deftly batted away from their stealth attempt and left with no technical cake for their efforts.

Last came the Showstopper Challenge at the very end of update where the furry bakers attempted to salvage their running at Star Baker in the final moments in Reddit Malaysia. As the final challenge intended to wow the audience, expectations were high for the last baking effort as the raiders lept in a seemingly impossibly tight trigger with just one second between moving and the region updating. Raiders and defenders alike held their breath in anticipation as the showstopping bake was revealed, only to sigh in disappointment as the soggy cake collapsed inward shortly after being presented to the judges.

All in all, despite their best efforts the Lone Wolves would not be earning Star Baker after such a rough week in the baking tent––possibly even at risk of being sent home altogether. All four raids fell through with "soggy bottoms" that could not match the standard of fine British baking sensibilities nor fill the hungry stomachs of the 20 defenders following close behind.

Not to worry, though, since the 20 high stack of defenders we pulled together on a short update notice got plenty of wins to munch on instead. It's not often we get to defend four occupation attempts in a single update but did so with ease with help from our defender allies in a combo of technical mastery, flawless execution, and delicious victory. Such a satisfying and tasty reward only comes after months of sharpening our skills and practiced mastery of taking update shenanigans in stride.

Anyway, I think that exhausts my Great British Bake Off references for the next month or so. If any raiders would like some baking lessons, come check us out and reach Star Baker status

Wardens Involved
First Warden Grea Kriopia
Chamberlain Haku
Commander Altmoras
Commander Roavin
Commander Tim
Commander Vincent Drake
Constable Luca
Lieutenant Moon
Lieutenant Quebecshire
Senior Warden Eshialand
Senior Warden Ryccia

Allies About
[3GUYS] waste
[FRA/RRA] Salem
[LDF] DinoNet
[LDF] New Makasta
[NPA] Bobberino
[PAL] Bastiat
[SAAF] Forged in Fire
[SPSF] Dom
[SPSF] Gordon Freeman
[SPSF] HumanSanity
+ TITO

Regions Defended: 4
Random Acts of Kindness
The Helysian Chasm
Niaf
Reddit Malaysia

by **Thousand Branches** » Sun Dec 12, 2021 7:36 am

This might be my favorite Wardens report yet xD Soggy bottoms!!

by **Altmoras** » Mon Dec 13, 2021 2:31 pm

Magnificent report.

by **Ikania** » Mon Dec 20, 2021 1:36 am

WITHOUT THE DEFENDERIST PARTY, THERE WOULD BE NO NEW CHINA

A new day rises over the newly-liberated China, led in everlasting wisdom by the spirit of Comrade-Paramount Premier Milograd

At Major Update on December 20th, the combined forces of the Defenderist Bloc successfully liberated China from the clutches of the raider menace. The darkspawn and their bourgeois compatriots were driven from China in a Great Revolutionary People's Rising attended by 122 liberators. The revolution, faithfully guided by the Grey Wardens and LibCord (For Your Protection), put a quick end to the days-long raider occupation of China. Together with native aid, the Defenderist Party quickly mobilized in the dozens, raising the largest army seen this year to drive the mongrel dogs of the imperialists out of China.

Licking their wounds from their historic defeat at Trovons, the raiders were stunned tonight by the overwhelming juggernaut that is the Proletariat. Not only did we break the year's record (115), we exceeded it by seven. Talk about a lump of coal in the sockets of the bourgeoisie! The execution tonight, after two prior updates of trying, was nothing short of exquisite, and it makes for the perfect gift to cap this year and get everyone in a festive spirit. When the Red Guard liberated the capital city, the people were overjoyed and greeted their liberators with open arms. Truly, the Minnowite Revolution has come to China, sounding the death knell for the vile darkspawn capitalist exploiters. The native Delegate of China, Zhong-Guo, has already begun the necessary purges to maintain the drive of the revolution and safeguard his region from the revisionist Black Hawks.

I'm dreaming of a Red Christmas...

Heroes of the Revolution
First Warden Grea Kriopia
High Constable Sir Merlin
Chamberlain Haku
Warden-Commander Altmoras
Warden-Commander Roavin
Warden-Commander Tim
Warden-Commander Vincent Drake
Warden-Constable Luca
Warden-Constable Matthew
Warden-Lieutenant Alfonzo
Warden-Lieutenant Hades
Warden-Lieutenant Moon
Warden-Lieutenant Quebecshire
Warden-Delegate Aramantha (Valued Non-WA Support)
Silverite Guardian Allemeine
Guardian Champion insupekuta-
Senior Warden/Guardian Captain Eshialand
Senior Warden Atlantica
Senior Warden Cynder
Senor Warden Fauxia
Senior Warden Merni
Warden Rom
Warden Vis
Junior Warden Frenchy
Junior Warden Ike
Junior Warden Peter Renwalt
Junior Warden Thatrandomguy
Junior Warden Unkzier
Warden-Recruit Rob Wolf
Guardian LilEmoSoldier
Guardian Sandwichs
Guardian Stemmation
Seeker Jasian Nguyen
Seeker Xma10z

The Comintern:

The South Pacific Special Forces
The Rejected Realms Army
The Ten-Thousand Islands Treaty Organization
The League Defense Force
The Free Nations Defense Association
The East Pacific Sovereign Army
The Union of Democratic States Armed Forces
Sonindia Anti-Raider Armed Forces
Warzone Europe
Valhalla
Palatine
Aenaroth
The Region That Has No Big Banks
00000 A World Power
Imperial Japanese Navy
Founderless
Warzone Sandbox

+ all our assorted and beloved mercenaries

A famous person (me) once said: anyone who does not miss the golden age of Chairman Milograd Thought has no heart; anyone who does not want it back is a CLASS TRAITOR! A spectre is haunting gameplay; the spectre of Minnowism. Beware, industrialists and robber barons all -- your time grows short, as the righteous fury of the proletariat rises up to end your reign of terror. Stay tuned for the Wardens' next big W, delivered to you by GEICO: 15 minutes could save you 15% or more on car insurance.

♫ I'm not partial to the martial
Or the plutocrats, in their beaver hats
And the fascists have the outfits
But I don't care for the outfits
What I care about is music
And the communists have the music ♫

The ending of the words is ALMSIVI.

by **Tim-Opolis** » Mon Dec 20, 2021 1:48 am

What an absolute masterclass of a report! What a fucking awesome operation!

Thanks to everybody who worked with us to make this happen! Together, we will ensure that Raiderdom will never have a future in Gameplay!

by **Warden Altmoras** » Mon Dec 20, 2021 1:54 am

As usual raiders never stood a chance.

by **The Church of Satan** » Mon Dec 20, 2021 2:12 am

I believe Sun Tzu once wrote, in the Art of War, “If you know the raider and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred updaters."

by **Lord Dominator** » Mon Dec 20, 2021 2:18 am

On theme for the region I suppose, tho obligatory cringe for Mao :lol:

Of course, I take it then that TGW will support Milo/etc in returning to their rightful place as the government of TSP should the opportunity arise then?

(#ComradeMall)

Ikania wrote:[Stay tuned for the Wardens' next big W, delivered to you by GEICO: 15 minutes could save you 15% or more on car insurance.

Communists actually funded by insurance company owned by billionaire, math checks out.

by **Grea Kriopia** » Mon Dec 20, 2021 2:26 am

Fantastic work all around and thanks to Ike for the great report!

by **Honeydewistania** » Mon Dec 20, 2021 2:39 am

中国第一！！

Imperial Japanese Navy

Imperial Japan liberating Communist China... biggest plot twist ever

by **Lord Dominator** » Mon Dec 20, 2021 2:51 am

Honeydewistania wrote:中国第一！！

Imperial Japanese Navy

Imperial Japan liberating Communist China... biggest plot twist ever

Imperial Japan liberating anything China is a big plot twist (and also a rather odd theme given the history of the organization, especially with China).

Edit: Criticism of Japan’s military theming isn’t really a topic for this thread admittedly, this is just a convenient place to do so.

by **Destructive Government Economic System** » Mon Dec 20, 2021 4:17 am

Thanks for liberating China. Now I can eat my 烧卖 in peace today

by **Quebecshire** » Mon Dec 20, 2021 6:49 am

Raiders can get all the pilers they want, we will simply conscript more residents to combat the blight.

Amazing dub.

by **Alfonzo** » Mon Dec 20, 2021 8:01 am

Something, Something... NOW ALL OF CHINA KNOWS YOU ARE HERE

also nice spicy content

by **Doge Land** » Mon Dec 20, 2021 8:14 am

TGW in the NSLeft now!?! :blink:

Congrats to everyone on this lib. I can tell a lot of work went into organizing this, and now China gets to have 100 R/D puppets in their region for 3 years until they eventually CTE down to a manageable number.

by **HumanSanity** » Mon Dec 20, 2021 8:48 am

Great liberation by everyone, great work by TGW's officers, great turnout by their members, fantastic report by Ike. Pleasure to work with TGW and look forward to many more opportunities to stop raiders, regardless of LD's desire to open every defender thread and find a nit to pick.

by **Frenchy II** » Mon Dec 20, 2021 8:54 am

Lovely time liberating China and look forward to continued operations as a member of TGW <3

The Grey Wardens: Warden-Lieutenant Eshialand

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