by Dernel » Sun May 09, 2021 12:06 pm
by Dernel » Sun May 09, 2021 5:32 pm
To: Emperor 太陽神 of Piikala
From: Secretary of Defense Gorbachev Zubeknakov
Good Evening,
As it is late that I am writing this.
As a representative of the Dernellian government, it has been raised to my concern that you feel ill will towards us. I can understand that from past squanders and skirmishes why you may contain some latent resentment towards our government, but I think the recent rise in tensions is totally unfounded. For one to enact sanctions, trade embargos, tariffs, and threaten to go to war with another, concerningly much stronger government, over a single excerpt from a newspaper magazine is a little immature, premature, if not also flat out comical.
Dernel simply cancelled flights to and from the Piikalan colony over concerns of the use of biological weapons, of which are known to be notoriously hard to control. The threat of Dernellian sanctions against Piikala is only in the event that your nation should fail to keep the biological weapons under control. If this seems unreasonable, then perhaps I am unreasonable, but safety of my peoples comes before the wellbeing of ties of a former enemy nation. I'm sure you can relate.
In regards to the recent actions taken against Dernel, they are truly of no consequence. No Dernellians reside in Piikala, no Piikalans reside in Dernel as is our policy with any nation. Trade embargos, and tariffs are also of no consequence. No Dernellian companies sell products to Piikala due to aforementioned conflicts, as well as the countries ever growing pursuit of autarky means we buy no products from Piikala. Should this situation escalate to a status of actual military conflict, Dernel will not hesitate to quite literally bring down the hammer of god on Piikala, even if it takes all 200, we have bested you before, and should it come to blows again, do not think for a moment we will not do it once more.
Thank you, and enjoy your evening,
-signed: Gorbachev Zubeknakov
by Piikala » Mon May 10, 2021 9:47 am
Dernel wrote:In response to viewtopic.php?p=38633312#p38633312
Zubeknakov watched the recording of the address while he was pouring himself a drink, he sat down and drank slowly from his glass as he watched, and when the recording was finished, he looked up to his aide,
"Ok, and this is the guy that we dealt with before, right?"
"Yes, during the Trenakan Insurgency."
"He does realize we don't have any ties with them because of that, right?"
"Being a leader of an entire government, I would imagine such..."
"He does also realize we are an autarky, correct?"
"That isn't something many people know about, sir."
"And what is it that put them on this rant?"
"It is believed to be a paragraph from The Empyrea Post in Lapsil."
"Huh...", Zubeknakov sat thinking for a moment, "Hand me my tablet, please." He began to type a letter that would be addressed to Piikala:To: Emperor 太陽神 of Piikala
From: Secretary of Defense Gorbachev Zubeknakov
Good Evening,
As it is late that I am writing this.
As a representative of the Dernellian government, it has been raised to my concern that you feel ill will towards us. I can understand that from past squanders and skirmishes why you may contain some latent resentment towards our government, but I think the recent rise in tensions is totally unfounded. For one to enact sanctions, trade embargos, tariffs, and threaten to go to war with another, concerningly much stronger government, over a single excerpt from a newspaper magazine is a little immature, premature, if not also flat-out comical.
Daniel simply cancelled flights to and from the Piikalan colony over concerns of the use of biological weapons, which are known to be notoriously hard to control. The threat of Dernellian sanctions against Piikala is only in the event that your nation should fail to keep the biological weapons under control. If this seems unreasonable, then perhaps I am unreasonable, but the safety of my peoples comes before the wellbeing of ties of a former enemy nation. I'm sure you can relate.
In regards to the recent actions taken against Dernel, they are true of no consequence. No Dernellians reside in Piikala, no Piikalans reside in Dernel, as is our policy with any nation. Trade embargos and tariffs are also of no consequence. No Dernellian companies sell products to Piikala due to the aforementioned conflicts, as well as the countries ever-growing pursuit of autarky means we buy no products from Piikala. Should this situation escalate to a status of actual military conflict, Dernel will not hesitate to quite literally bring down the hammer of god on Piikala, even if it takes all 200, we have bested you before, and should it come to blows again, do not think for a moment we will not do it once more.
Thank you, and enjoy your evening,
-signed: Gorbachev Zubeknakov
Zubeknakov read it over once more before having it sent to the Emperor directly. He finished his drink before he stood up and left his office.
To: Secretary of Defense Gorbachev Zubeknakov
From: The Imperial Piikalan Navys Shogun Third Class Kato, Ku'puanani
Dear Mr. Zubeknakov,
The Imperial State would like to say that we do not wish the foreign nations of the earth ill will, nor do we wish to halt the world's free trade as it is the official wish of the Imperial House of Piikala to bring peace and harmony to the world. We also would like to remind your nation that the Imperial State has more power than what you or the world have seen as any developed nation has. We also would like to apologize for your government taking the ignorant and powerless Piikalan diet seriously. They are nothing more than noisemakers for the Piikalan tabloids and have as much power as a gust of disgusting western wind against the ancestor's shrine. The Piikalan nation shall also say that our weapons are held securely and kept safely despite the screams of those who believe in the disgusting western ideals. With our weapons being necessary, not all wish for the Piikalan nation and its traditions to be maintained against Western ideals. So may thy wish thee well health and good day.
-Signed(In Piikalan) Ku'puanani Kato
by Dernel » Mon May 10, 2021 10:40 am
Piikala wrote:Dernel wrote:In response to viewtopic.php?p=38633312#p38633312
Zubeknakov watched the recording of the address while he was pouring himself a drink, he sat down and drank slowly from his glass as he watched, and when the recording was finished, he looked up to his aide,
"Ok, and this is the guy that we dealt with before, right?"
"Yes, during the Trenakan Insurgency."
"He does realize we don't have any ties with them because of that, right?"
"Being a leader of an entire government, I would imagine such..."
"He does also realize we are an autarky, correct?"
"That isn't something many people know about, sir."
"And what is it that put them on this rant?"
"It is believed to be a paragraph from The Empyrea Post in Lapsil."
"Huh...", Zubeknakov sat thinking for a moment, "Hand me my tablet, please." He began to type a letter that would be addressed to Piikala:To: Emperor 太陽神 of Piikala
From: Secretary of Defense Gorbachev Zubeknakov
Good Evening,
As it is late that I am writing this.
As a representative of the Dernellian government, it has been raised to my concern that you feel ill will towards us. I can understand that from past squanders and skirmishes why you may contain some latent resentment towards our government, but I think the recent rise in tensions is totally unfounded. For one to enact sanctions, trade embargos, tariffs, and threaten to go to war with another, concerningly much stronger government, over a single excerpt from a newspaper magazine is a little immature, premature, if not also flat-out comical.
Daniel simply cancelled flights to and from the Piikalan colony over concerns of the use of biological weapons, which are known to be notoriously hard to control. The threat of Dernellian sanctions against Piikala is only in the event that your nation should fail to keep the biological weapons under control. If this seems unreasonable, then perhaps I am unreasonable, but the safety of my peoples comes before the wellbeing of ties of a former enemy nation. I'm sure you can relate.
In regards to the recent actions taken against Dernel, they are true of no consequence. No Dernellians reside in Piikala, no Piikalans reside in Dernel, as is our policy with any nation. Trade embargos and tariffs are also of no consequence. No Dernellian companies sell products to Piikala due to the aforementioned conflicts, as well as the countries ever-growing pursuit of autarky means we buy no products from Piikala. Should this situation escalate to a status of actual military conflict, Dernel will not hesitate to quite literally bring down the hammer of god on Piikala, even if it takes all 200, we have bested you before, and should it come to blows again, do not think for a moment we will not do it once more.
Thank you, and enjoy your evening,
-signed: Gorbachev Zubeknakov
Zubeknakov read it over once more before having it sent to the Emperor directly. He finished his drink before he stood up and left his office.
The Piikalan emperor sits at a large grand sitting table eating a bowl of grapes as one of his secretaries reads the letter to him in Piikalan. When he suddenly breaks out laughing, saying between chuckles in Piikalan, "We didn't even try in the Trenakan conflict! We just threw a token to the Trenakans to satisfy them so we could get a trade deal!! HAHAHAHA!!! Do they think they can beat us? We have three billion people under my rule and a manufacturing base that can outstrip any nation!!! Also, they actually took that stupid jingoistic PM seriously?!?!? OOOHHH HAHAHAHAHA!! Common, they know, the diet is nothing more than a joke with no power outside of what they want their cushy offices to look like! Is it not known that the Imperial households the power? HAHAHAHA" The emperor then suddenly stops laughing and stands to attention and bows to the Piikalan Empress(Note the Piikalan empress is a title given to the most competent daughter of the Empress of the Piikalan Imperial Family and isn't selected based upon marriage) as she walks into the room wearing an ornately colored kimono. She says to the emperor in Piikalan, "Good evening, cousin(The empress refers to the emperor as cousin even though they're sixth cousins). Why're you in such a worked-up state?" "AAHHH cousin, you should look at this letter the Geijins sent us! They actually took that stupid loud-mouthed PM seriously! It's just absolutely hilarious!" says the emperor as he plucks and eats a grape. The empress is handed the letter from the secretary while she sits and eats a grape and begins to read it, mumbling in Piikalan, "Ahhh, these Geijins always creating so much trouble. Always thinking that politicians in this country have power. I even think they think your cousin runs this country when rather it's the whole Imperial House whose members we chose who run the nation's day-to-day operations. While we like competent helmspersons guide the nation on the path towards success. Our previous leaders guided and ruled this country from a little swampy island to a great empire. Also, does that War mongering PM even know anything about the world? Does he even know the Dernel is an autarkic nation? Cousin, may I suggest we buy each of those obnoxious politicians a world atlas for Makahiki(Piikalan New Years)? HAHAHAHA!!!" "HAHAHA!!! We should! We should! Anyways secretary Park, get me a Shogun from the War Pagoda to write a letter to the Dernel nation!" says the Piiklaan Emperor. Secretary Park bows and says, "Yes, your holiness." Secretary park then walks backward out of the room, constantly facing the emperor. A few minutes later, an older man dressed in a black uniform that resembles a Samurais suit of armor comes into the room, his front half in a bow he; upon getting into the room know tows to the emperor and says, "Thy holiness's what shall they do for thee?" "Greetings, Shogun Kato, please raise your head. I don't want you to hurt your back." says the Piikalan emperor. The Shogun raises his head from the tatami and sits up straight while his head is trained down upon the tatami mat at his knees and says, "Thank you my holiness's for your concern about me. Now, what shall they do for thee?" "Shogun Kato, I would like you to write a letter to the Denel Secretary of Defense." says the empress. "Yes, your holiness's thy shall," says Shogun Kato; as he gets up looking down, he walks backward out of the room. Shogun Kato then sits down and gets to work in his office. He writes in English:To: Secretary of Defense Gorbachev Zubeknakov
From: The Imperial Piikalan Navys Shogun Third Class Kato, Ku'puanani
Dear Mr. Zubeknakov,
The Imperial State would like to say that we do not wish the foreign nations of the earth ill will, nor do we wish to halt the world's free trade as it is the official wish of the Imperial House of Piikala to bring peace and harmony to the world. We also would like to remind your nation that the Imperial State has more power than what you or the world have seen as any developed nation has. We also would like to apologize for your government taking the ignorant and powerless Piikalan diet seriously. They are nothing more than noisemakers for the Piikalan tabloids and have as much power as a gust of disgusting western wind against the ancestor's shrine. The Piikalan nation shall also say that our weapons are held securely and kept safely despite the screams of those who believe in the disgusting western ideals. With our weapons being necessary, not all wish for the Piikalan nation and its traditions to be maintained against Western ideals. So may thy wish thee well health and good day.
-Signed(In Piikalan) Ku'puanani Kato
To: The Imperial Piikalan Navy's Shogun Third Class Kato, Ku'puanani
From: Secretary of Defense Gorbachev Zubeknakov
Good morning, Mr. Ku'puanani
as it is morning here,
I would like to begin by stating it is a relief that no such ill will is held towards Dernel, and that you do not actually plan to take action against us. We are glad that it is your countries goal to maintain peace through the world, as any proper leader should look to keep peace. We do heed any nation, as any we recognize the sovereignty of is a powerful nation in the world theatre. It is now understood that even should someone in your nation be of high ranking it does not immediately represent the choice of your nation, and more figureheads are present than initially thought. I would like to apologize for the threat in the previous letter, but I am sure you understand the reasoning behind such. In previous times I would offer an opportunity for trade talks after a squabble like this, but the times have changed. Thank you for your understanding, I hope this letter finds you and the country of good health,
-Signed: a man too old for good health, Gorbachev Zubeknakov
by Dernel » Tue May 11, 2021 1:38 pm
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