World Cup 87 - RP Thread

by **Audioslavia** » Wed Jan 27, 2021 12:06 pm

(clicking the image takes you straight to the YouTube video)

Original Script
This is a nice graph. Let’s invert it.

The Inverted Sosimo Lisson Metric shows every team’s *worst* three-cycle era. We’ve divided it into three sections to account for a general theme: Most nations experience their worst run in the cycles immediately after their debut. We’ve put those teams in orange. This is the norm. Most teams are at their weakest in their debut cycles. Polar Islandstates, Baker Park, Anglatia and Bonesea were all pretty strong right off the bat, while Crosshill and Al-Quds are two early champions whose worst three cycles are also their *only* three cycles.

Next, the yellows. The worst run of these yellow teams wasn’t in their very first cycle, but instead immediately after a hiatus. Royal Kingdom of Quebec had entered World Cup 59 before becoming a regular fixture from cycle 62 onwards. All of these teams are the type to leave and come back again. In their worst era they are all starting a comeback of at least three cycles, with Recuecn at the top of this merry band, qualifying via the playoffs on their cycle 83 return after having entered only two other World Cups previously - Editions 72 and 73.

The teams in blue are the most interesting group. These are the sides whose weakest trio of cycles came in the *middle* of an extended run. They’d played a few consecutive cycles, established themselves at a certain level, and then somehow... got worse.

The way multiversal football works… that’s kind of a strange thing to do. As a result, a lot of these *nations* are pretty strange. It’s like a who’s-who of meme-teams. Here’s the incomparable Lymantatia next to the timeless Lovisa, above dearly missed Maklohi Vai and The Weegies - and here’s the perennially unlucky San Regada sitting two spots above The Belmore Family

At the top: Mriin. But why?

In Mriin’s first three cycles, the Reavers lost only eleven games, mainly in qualifiers. From World Cups 83 to 85, they lost only nine, largely in the finals. The key is that they played 58 times in that first period, but only 45 in the second. Hosting the World Cup may adversely affect your Sosimo Lisson prospects if you lose and go out early.

Let’s sort these teams by value as opposed to type. Here’s Valanora. They’re first. *FOUR HUNDRED AND FIRST*
<air horns, hitmarkers etc>

Seriously though. The Untitled Elf Game. I win a point.

At the very bottom, Tocapa have company in the form of Hemas, San Verdi and Olastor, who round out the list as the nations who had the losingest eras of all time. For most of these teams, their worst cycle is their first cycle. It stands to reason. But this chapter isn’t about them.

When The Idiot Project covers the subject of *losing*, we’re not interested in teams that lost mere football matches. Losing, as a concept, as an artform, is much deeper and much more nuanced than that. Yes. I am gatekeeping defeat.

You may call me a hipster, to which I offer the following riposte: It’s impossible to listen to seventies Japanese jazz while watching a video about the statistics of three thousand imaginary football teams *before it’s cool*.

Losing comes in six flavours. Vanilla, Logical, Romantic, Hyperesthetic, Hypoesthetic and Cheese.

Tocapa and the like are examples of vanilla losing. Bad teams doing bad football things and getting bad results. They lost, and they know they lost, and that’s fine.

Closely related to Vanilla Losing is Hypoesthetic Losing, which is a ten dollar way of saying a team lost, but didn’t feel anything when it happened. The teams from the chronicles of ridiculousness? Most of them lost football matches that they weren’t paying attention to anyway. Their national football team left the country and got schooled but their nation’s media never mentioned anything about it. The team came back and never told anyone they’d been an international footballer for five minutes. It’d be like trying to tell your friends that you were once an internationally recognised fridge magnet thrower. People don’t know what that is and telling them about your exploits is just going to make them confused and angry.

So far, so uncontroversial. Here’s the third type of loser. Hyperesthetic.

What would be most painful, the feeling of being poked by a few dozen sewing needles or the feeling of being run through a broadsword? You can go and experiment. I’ll wait.

Did you go for option A? Honestly that’s what I’d have gone for as well. This is the method used by Tocapa, DJ8989 and the like. Lose often, shrug it off, continue your day. That’s not the case for Hyperesthetic losers.

For any international football team that demands nothing less than continued, perpetual, uninterrupted success. losses happen with a frequency of maybe once per year. It’s a defeat in a major final or the latter stages of an international football tournament and it *hurts*. It’s a missed opportunity. It represents a chance for your rivals to close or extend the gap between them and you. These teams may not feel defeat very often, but when they *do* feel it, it’s a pure, refined, intense pain that most people simply don’t experience. They’re not big losers, but when they lose, it’s big.

A close relative of Hyperesthetic Losing is Romantic flavour Losing. This is Hollywood Losing. It’s beloved Polarian Alexander Van Sorenson leaving everything on the field in straining to arrest his nation’s run of World Cup Final defeats, and failing. It’s The Babbage Islands getting closer and closer to the finish line but never quite making it. It’s a relative of Hyperesthetic losing but, really, it’s the opposite. Whereas Hyperesthetic Losers live in constant fear of the broadsword, for these teams, there is always the feeling that, for them, the end of the story is yet to happen. There’s always hope.

Cheese flavour losing is the type experienced by one-off puppet nations dipping a toe into international football. That just leaves us with one. Logical Losing.

Is it the opposite of Romantic Losing? Yes and no. Yes, there is nothing romantic about Logical Losing but no, it’s not named as such in an attempt to position it as the opposite of Romantic Losing.

Logical losing isn’t named after its attributes. Logical losing is named after a football team.

Scrapped Script
These charts are pretty to look at, but we no longer have any use for the Sosimo Lisson Metric. This isn’t an episode about the greatest eras of these teams. This episode is about their losingest eras. For that, we’re going to need to invert our chart.

The Inverted Sosimo Lisson Metric shows every team’s *worst* three-cycle era. We’ve divided it into three sections to account for a general theme: Most nations experience their worst run in the cycles immediately after their debut. We’ve put those teams in orange. They make up the overwhelming majority of these teams. At the top, nations who did well in their debut and never took a backwards step. Polar Islandstates, Baker Park, Anglatia and Bonesea. Crosshill and Al-Quds are two early champions whose worst three cycles are also their *only* three cycles.

— script follows the finalized version until just after the Mriin bit —

Valanora being second on that graph isn’t enough for me to score a point in the Untitled Elf Game, but this reversed graph totally works. Taking all three colours together, Valanora are 401st overall, their opening three cycles worse than average for teams that stuck around for more than two editions of the World Cup. The only team above them on that first chart, Schottia, are a good 200 places below them on the second. Schottia’s unbeatable era came fewer than ten cycles after their ‘very damned beatable’ era, with twenty-five losses coming over the course of just forty-four games. At the very bottom, Tocapa’s three-cycle run may have been worse than everyone else’s best, but not everyone else’s worst. Here. Let me introduce you to Olastor.

What Olastor did better than most other teams isn’t simply to lose - there are plenty of single-serving nations who have done that more spectacularly - but to lose and come back again. Time and time again, as if losing was what they *wanted* out of football. In their greatest cycle, World Cup 82, they lost only four times in eighteen games - that’s less than half as many losses as their previous cycle and a third as many as the one prior to that. What did they do with this form? They tossed it in the bin. They refused to enter the next World Cup, coming back only for World Cup 85 where they lost seventeen of twenty-four games to finish dead last in Group 9, fifty-four whole points behind first and six points behind the heady heights of 12th.

Olastor’s win percentage in World Cup games, in total, is a little under 23%. When their fans go to see them play, there’s a 60% chance that they’ll see their country get beat. They’ve lost 110 times in 184 games. Every time they put their name down for a World Cup they’re probably going to lose ten more at least. And yet they keep coming back. Their fans keep coming back. And that deserves respect.

It isn’t easy following a losing team. I mean you all know someone who supports a big club. They’re a fan of AFC Treason or Spartangrad or C.A. Paulinthal despite the fact they live in Drawkland or Darmen. They live a couple of miles from their local team but they’ve never seen play, but then they’ve never seen *tHeIr* team play except on TV. Why do they do it? Why pretend you’re a fan of a big team in a different country? Why not support your local team, in sixteenth place in the second tier in your own country? It’s simple, and it’s the same reason why a losing team will get fewer and fewer fans for as long as they keep losing.

Teams that don’t win disgust us. With every time they try - and fail - they commit a cardinal sin: They remind us of ourselves. They, like us, are not superheroes. They get outthought and outbattled and outplayed. We want to believe they’re capable of beating the best, and maybe they are on occasion, but it’s also true that a group of hack clodhoppers representing a tinpot footballing backwater can figure out a couple of things that can confound those players you desperately wanted to be the next incarnations of Sosimo Lissón. Your F.A.’s social media team had built your star player up to be a sexier, left-footed version of Thorsten Kramer, but after ninety minutes of flailing you realise he’s… just a guy. A guy who can’t get the job done. A guy like you.

Fans of bad, lossy teams are a weird breed. They’re masochists or hipsters or people who need a helping of anger or indignation to get through their day or just people who continue to cling onto hope long after everyone else has let go. They love water-cooler football talk every Monday, but can’t understand it when, every few weeks or so, their work colleagues tune out from the conversation and get antsy when you ask them about football. Their team of multi-millionaire mercenaries lost at the weekend. Now they’re suddenly into baseball. Fans who follow a big team always disown them in the days after a loss, but then... we all do. And that’s why we should all be grateful for those multiversal football teams that, week after week, year on year, decade upon decade keep showing up, and losing, and losing, and *losing*, and keep coming back again and again. Those teams that lose every week have more resolve, bravery and determination than any top-ranked side. They are the lifeblood of international football more so than any top team you can name. They are true heroes.

There is a heroism in losing. And when it comes to losing, no team in the multiverse, throughout the rich history of the World Cup, is more heroic than this team. The greatest of the bad teams. My personal heroes.

Eastfield Lodge.

Very few people would ever call Rohan Cammers ‘statuesque’ - unless there’s been a recent drive in the sculptological community towards chiselling scrawny arseholes out of coprolite - but as he stands and stares and scowls and stares, unblinking and unwavering, at his Audioslavia side lining up defend a last-minute Kalactinian corner, there’s precious few other ways to describe him.

Larry Martinez, a player Rohan knows all to well from his days in Audioslavian domestic football, whips the cross into the box. Jimmy McCarthy is there, but gets underneath the header, which loops into the arms of Goran Stroud.

Suddenly, the statue steps forward and roars unintelligibly in the general direction of Goran Stroud.

“Fackafuggingeddifackinapthepitchyafuggincantye”

Goran Stroud duly gets it up the pitch with one heave of his right arm. Eurico Da Rosa, the substitute, runs onto the ball as it bounces up the line and flails at it before Joseph Anderson can intercept. The ball squirms away and into Erwin Spijkers’s path, who knocks the ball far ahead of him down the wing, getting his head down, entering sprint-mode, and beating Kalactinian Matt Hall to the ball. He takes one more touch, taking the ball to the corner of the 18 yard-box, before playing the ball into the space he assumes Koenraad Rijsbergen will be arriving in shortly, having seen him from the corner of his eye moments earlier. Two Kalactinians are desperately running back to cover, and Rijsbergen isn’t the fastest player in the world, but he *is* a strong one. He leans into the challenge to his left as a shield, waits for the ball to arrive at his feet, and swipes at it. It’s not a clean shot, but it’s the spooniness of it that bamboozles the onrushing Mark Romero, who flails despairingly as the ball arcs out of his reach and loops awkardly into the far corner for 4-3, right at the death.

Koenraad hears a roar from his own bench. It sounds very much like “Fackinavafugginbiddathatyafackinbell”, which is a phrase Rohan Cammers has become fond of saying.

Audioslavia, who had only won one qualifying group since their World Cup 80 return to international football, finally, were in the driving seat. 5 or 7 points from their two remaining home games would be enough to at least make the playoffs.

by **Sylestone** » Wed Jan 27, 2021 2:38 pm

Matchday Fourteen
Another game, another expected loss. This time it was 2-1 to the Independent Athletes from Quebec, a side that the Sentients have a 1-0-1 record against heading into this game. However, that figure diminished to 1-0-2 as the Quebecois ran rampant around the Sylestoneans on the field.
Still, the experience in Quebec was worth it. They were generous enough to build a hotel for the Sylestone players that could fit in. There was no mixer, so the Mixer had to do the mixing. There was no washing machine, so the Washing Machine got to have a bit of fun. Good times for the Sentients, indeed.
The game itself, though, was a good one. It was hugely important for both sides and the crowd showed it, cheering wildly every time something good happened for their side. Whenever a Quebecois goal was scored, everyone within 10 kilometres was deafened. It was just the way it was.
Quebec kicked off to the roar of the crowd and were in on goal two minutes later when Erin Kang kicked the ball over the Dishwasher and into the vacant space behind. Pablo Mancosu ran after it and shot for goal, but only succeeded in booting it straight into the Brick Wall, deflecting the ball away. The crowd groaned as the game continued.
Sylestone opened the scoring in the 13th minute, from near the corner post. The Tumble Dryer had run up the wing with the ball, keeping Quebecois defenders Brian Mantha and Bastian Borges at bay before crossing it into the Bar Stool. He kicked the ball at Nelson Okello in goals, but he was good enough to try and palm it out of play. Nearly. The Mixer put on a burst of speed to catch up to the ball and slot it just over the line before Okello got to it. It took extensive reviewing, but the goal was given as the crowd went deathly silent.
However, in the 24th minute, they were cheering again. And rightfully so, too, as Quebec had equalised. In the most extraordinary fashion, too. From behind the halfway line, Bastian Borges kicked a clearance a little bit too well. It flew over the forward's heads before bouncing once in the penalty area. It bounced over the Brick Wall and landed at the back of the net. Borges just stared, not believing it. But it had happened. A candidate for goal of the cycle had come from his very boot, and more importantly, it put the Quebecois back on equal footing with the Sentients, 1-1.
They went in the lead 19 minutes later, with 43 minutes down on the clock. Mancosu was fouled, and a free-kick was taken by the victim from thirty metres from the goal. Mancosu ran in and booted it, high and a tad wide. Or so we all thought. But it wasn't to be, as it curved in at the last possible moment, hit the post and ricocheted into the goal. On the verge of half-time, the Independent Athletes from Quebec were in the lead, 2-1, and an exciting game was on our hands.
Sylestone had opportunities to score in the 56th, 61st and 64th minutes, all stemming from brilliant assists by the Dishwasher and Stove. But Okello in goals was simply too good as he stopped the possible equaliser every single time with heroic manoeuvres.
A lull period followed, but in the 82nd minute, Quebec was once again honing in on goal. Midfielder Erin Kang shot at goal, but a last-gasp slide tackle by the Ironing Board meant that only a corner was given. The kick was wayward, and the score remained 2-1.
Three minutes into injury time, Sylestone got their final opportunity. The Dishwasher passed to the Sofa, who played a lovely through pass up the line to the Stove. The Stove ran part of the way up the wing before passing it in to the Tumble Dryer, who instinctively shot at goal. It looked to be going in. It was going in. Except there was something in the way, Nelson Okello. He continued his brilliant game by knocking the ball over the crossbar, effectively winning the game for his side. Two minutes later, he had, and Sylestone continued their run of bad form.

INDEPENDENT ATHLETES FROM QUEBEC - 2
Borges 24'
Mancosu 43'

SYLESTONE - 1
Mixer 13'

Matchday Fourteen
Oh, the sheer pain. Why did this have to happen to us? Everyone in Sylestone knew how big a game this was, but the Sentients just didn't perform. A 2-1 loss, at home, to the hands of the Blouman Empire. To be fair to them, they did play supremely well and deserved the win, but you still just have to shake your head.
Bloumany kicked off, but neither side really had many chances for the first twenty minutes or so. Then, in the 23rd, a penalty kick was awarded to the opposition and the Sentients had to stand there, waiting for the inevitable. But it didn't happen. Somehow, and don't ask me how, star forward Luke Cousins fucked up the kick and completely missed the goal. He shook his head, unfazed and prepared for play.
Sylestone had their first opportunity in the 39th minute after a brilliant clearance from the Washing Machine fell right in front of the Mixer, who dribbled around Jason Potts before passing to the Tumble Dryer. He shot at goal, and due to a mistake by Henry Polinoir, the ball went in. Sylestone were 1-0 up, or so they thought. Except it wasn't. The Tumble Dryer was offside. F in the chat, please.
It came back to bite them, as in the 44th minute, Cousins was given yet another penalty when the Ironing Board fouled him quite severely, and purposefully. He was immediately given a red card and sent off. To make matters worse, this time Cousins actually slotted the goal in and the Blouman Empire went 1-0 up.
They stayed 1-0 up for a little while, but only until the 60th minute of the match. The AC Vent, on for a tired Tumble Dryer, got a good pass from the Bar Stool in the midfield. He mistimed his shot at goal, but it fell straight for the Tumble Dryer, who managed tp pass it back, through three Bloumany defenders. Don't ask me how. But this time, the AC Vent was good enough and the goal was taken. Sylestone had equalised and were back in the contest.
As the timer ran down, neither side could break the shackles as the score remained deadlocked at 1-1. Sylestone had a decent opportunity from a corner in the 82nd, but the header from the Bar Stool hit the crossbar. Bloumany had a chance in the 88th, but the shot missed. A draw seemed inevitable. But there was one last twist.
Four minutes into injury time, a desperate shot from Paul Credab was utterly messed up as it fell at the feet of an offside Brad Hunter. The Brick Wall, surprised play was allowed to continue, wasn't prepared as Hunter shot the ball into the net.
The offside wasn't called as it was a look closer than it looked from a spectator's point of view. So Bloumany had won and Sylestone was officially eliminated. They only play for pride now.

SYLESTONE - 1
AC Vent 60'

BLOUMAN EMPIRE - 2
Cousins 44' (p)
Hunter 90+4'

by **Yue Zhou** » Wed Jan 27, 2021 3:00 pm

JOURNEY TO THE SOUTH
1. Chen Xiaozhu
2. Liao Weizhe
3. Chen Xiaozhu
4. Liao Weizhe
5. Chen Xiaozhu
6. Liao Weizhe

7. Chen Xiaozhu
Xingruifang Governor’s House
Nangang City, Nanhai Province, Yuezhou

How shocked were we? Well, very. But honestly, it wasn’t a huge loss for us. Liao and I were never that close, and he wasn’t going to be particularly involved in the negotiations. And I’d always had doubts that Jia Wanghui wasn’t who he was claiming to be, so it wasn’t like he was going to be any help in Nangang, either. It was more troubling because we had no idea why they’d disappeared or where they were going - the suddenness of the disappearance, as well as how soon after our arrival in Nangang it’d occurred, were particularly jarring. But what could we do? By the time we noticed, I guess they were long gone. Meng Huizhong went out to look while Dong Daiyu and I prepared for our meetings, but with nowhere to look and nobody to ask...he had little recourse.

More important to us was our meeting with Zheng Zhoulun. The balance of power in Yuezhou had gradually shifted to his halls since we’d set out, with Nanhai forces knocking on Yincheng’s doorstep and surging into Beiyun. Our Revolution had finally gotten off the ground, and occupied significant territory in Beiyun, but compared to the southern separatists we had little to work with. Dong remained outwardly optimistic that he would hear us out. But I think we both knew by then that Nanhai were becoming a bigger threat than the NPRC, now driven back from all directions. The situation left me more than a little uneasy - with Xihaishi increasingly socialist, the north and south separating in their own unique ways, and Sangau’s status still uncertain, it sometimes felt Yuezhou was coming apart at the seams.

So, a few days later, when we finally made our way to the Governor’s House after several delays on their end, there was a lot of tension among our party of three. Beian hadn’t been putting a lot of pressure on us lately, despite our constant updates - but we knew the stakes. After all, what reason would Zheng Zhoulun have to stop at Yincheng if the whole of Yuezhou could find its way into his open palm? If he decided to turn against us, then we would have no foreign funders, no equipment, no weapons to stop him. The only way for the Revolution was through Zheng - at least, that’s how I saw things. It turns out not everyone saw it that way, as you’ve seen.

So we made our way over to Xingruifang, the historic governor’s mansion from which Zheng Zhoulun ruled the south - me with all my notes and figures, Dong Daiyu with that box she’d picked up in the north and brought down for some reason. Despite all the warfare that had been happening in the city lately, the building itself stood tall and proud - battered by recent events, but almost regal in its complexion nevertheless. Inside, the building felt palatial, a rare historic building to survive the decades of socialist rule. We’d heard Zheng’s aesthetic was a bit of a throwback to the old days of the southern merchant republics, and Xingruifang did nothing to dispute that.

Once inside, we were thoroughly patted down, scanned, and searched, after which we were escorted by a few levels of increasingly-armed guards into Zheng’s office. The Nanhai governor was slighter than I imagined, but with piercing grey eyes and a gravitas that belied his frame. He seemed distracted at the time, but friendly enough as we exchanged pleasantries and made our case. It was a vacant kind of friendly though, the kind that never reached the eyes, the kind that said his mind had already been made up. But I at least was able to outline all the arguments in favor of our cooperation, our vision for the future of Yuezhou, and how everything fit together.

Ultimately, though, we never had a chance. I’d done so much research about Zheng Zhoulun before we’d met, and I knew enough about his philosophy to know he was never going to cooperate with us, that a southern invasion of Beiyun was likely in the cards. Zheng was part of that rare breed of southern separatist that believed not only in separation from Yuezhou, but who no longer believed in the concept of Yuezhou. After all, it had been a disparate group of feuding republics, kingdoms, and nomadic peoples before the socialist unification - and to him, there was no reason it had to stay in its current state. His policies were never ones of cooperation, but one of restoring Nanhai to its former glory. And with his total victory imminent, although he didn’t necessarily wish harm upon the plucky northerners that had come to ask him for help, he saw no reason to do it. What had been written into his face from the very beginning was really a rare form of pity.

So when we finished, with nothing but some half-baked promises and non-committal promises of support to take from the meeting, we knew the end was nigh. It wouldn’t be our greatest issue for long, though. Just before we could leave the room, Zheng Zhoulun slumped over on his chair with a wordless cry. He was dead within the hour.

by **Quemorr Isles** » Wed Jan 27, 2021 3:36 pm

THIS IS A SIMULATION. THIS IS NOT REAL.

Group A

Matchday Fourteen
Damukuni 1–2 Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom
Sylestone 1–1 Filindostan
Newmanistan 1–2 Riena
Bongo Johnson 1–1 Vangaziland
Hampton Island 0–2 South Covello

Matchday Fifteen
Hampton Island 1–0 Damukuni
South Covello 2–1 Bongo Johnson
Vangaziland 0–2 Newmanistan
Riena 3–1 Sylestone
Filindostan 2–2 Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom

Group A                       Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Newmanistan                    15   10   1   4    33   20  +13    31
 2 South Covello                  15    8   6   1    28   13  +15    30
 3 Riena                          15    7   6   2    15    9   +6    27
 4 Hampton Island                 15    7   3   5    17   16   +1    24
 5 Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom      15    5   5   5    23   23    0    20
 6 Damukuni                       15    5   4   6    21   19   +2    19
 7 Sylestone                      15    4   5   6    30   31   −1    17
 8 Filindostan                    15    3   8   4    15   17   −2    17
 9 Vangaziland                    15    3   5   7    11   21  −10    14
10 Bongo Johnson                  15    1   1  13    13   37  −24     4

Group B

Matchday Fourteen
Tumbra 0–0 Vdara
Ancherion 2–3 The Grearish Union
Natanians and Nosts 1–1 Cheetahs and Reptiles Coalison
Xanneria 0–0 South Newlandia
Brenecia 1–0 Lisander

Matchday Fifteen
Brenecia 4–0 Tumbra
Lisander 0–2 Xanneria
South Newlandia 0–0 Natanians and Nosts
Cheetahs and Reptiles Coalison 0–1 Ancherion
The Grearish Union 0–2 Vdara

Group B                            Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Brenecia                            15   10   3   2    43   21  +22    33
 2 Ancherion                           15   10   0   5    25   19   +6    30
 3 Vdara                               15    9   2   4    26   13  +13    29
 4 South Newlandia                     15    7   6   2    24   16   +8    27
 5 Xanneria                            15    8   1   6    34   27   +7    25
 6 Lisander                            15    7   1   7    19   20   −1    22
 7 Natanians and Nosts                 15    4   5   6    17   24   −7    17
 8 The Grearish Union                  15    4   4   7    29   33   −4    16
 9 Cheetahs and Reptiles Coalison      15    2   2  11    17   33  −16     8
10 Tumbra                              15    1   2  12    14   42  −28     5

Game of the Week
Brenecia's 4-0 thumping of Tumbra at home was expected, but it's always a shock whenever a nation thumps another by a margin such as that. The result puts the Brenecians three points clear at the top of Group B, ahead of Ancherion in second place and Vdara, who is currently in third on 29 points.

Upset of the Week
The Grearish Union's 3-2 beating of second-placed Ancherion away from home was a bit of an eyebrow-raiser for those in Group B. It continues Grearia's status as a bit of an upsetter who struggles to win games against the weaker sides. Despite the result, the Grearish Union are eliminated with only six sides still in contention for top two in Group B. Another notable upset is Riena's 2-1 win away from home against Pot 1 side Newmanistan in Group A.

by **Krytenia** » Wed Jan 27, 2021 3:41 pm

All The Damn Marbles
By Rami Niblick in Fiskadaha City, Poafmersia

THERE are three matches left to decide who goes to the World Cup, and who joins what looks like being an absolutely stacked Cup of Harmony. Looking to avoid the fate that appears to be about to envelop the likes of Nephara and Eura, and which lurks like a shadow over teams such as Equestria and the insanity that is the top of Group Eight, are our very own Dragons. Which brings us to the subject of Krytenia's next game, the first of the final set of double-headers.

With just three points separating Poafmersia from third-placed Krytenia, the two sides meet in the Poafmersian capital for a match that could very well decide who gets a playoff spot, and who gets the express lane tickets for the Cup of Harmony rollercoaster. The Red Panjias have the points advantage right now, it's true, but they know they need a win. A five-two capitulation to Paul Davis' side at the New City Stadium means that if the Dragons win, the two sides are level on points, and it's Krytenia who hold the tiebreaker. Of course, there is a flip side to this coin; the possibility that Poafmersia win by four goals. Not only would this be a disastrous collapse for the Dragons on the pitch, it would mean Poafmersia would not only have a six-point lead with two matches remaining, but they would also have the whip hand on the tiebreak, eliminating the men in sky blue on the spot.

Davis has mentioned in the build-up to the game that he has been studying gametapes obsessively, looking for every potential chink in the hosts' armour, every possible exploit or backdoor in their footballing code. Adnan Suliaha will doubtless have been doing the same thing for the home team as well, knowing how much is potentially on the line. There is, however, one problem that Poafmersia may not be able to overcome. Their default style, the genome for their footballing DNA, is a fast, attacking, high-pressing game. For most teams, this is a problem to be feared as they are conscious that any mistake is likely to be punished. Not so Krytenia. Now, we aren't arrogant enough to say we don't make mistakes - if we didn't we wouldn't have dropped fourteen points so far - but where the Red Panjias may hit a wall is that Krytenia know exactly how to play against that style. It's a tactic often employed by Krytenian sides of the past, and one they know exactly how to play against it. Just ask Southwest Eastnorth, who the Dragons have now beaten 10-2 on aggregate in their two group games.

One thing is for sure. Both sides will give it maximum effort on the pitch, and when the final whistle blows, the team on top will be the team that wants - and deserves - it more. Hopefully that will be Krytenia...if it is, then please, please don't undo all the hard work at home to West Zirconia. Onward!

by **Chartistan** » Wed Jan 27, 2021 4:27 pm

And thus began the trip to Zwangzug. Chartistan were out for the count for a while, but the spirit of a draw at home propelled the Chartistanis to the trip to FTC with pride and spirit. As the flight from Billboard to Zwangzug took off, a prospecting member of the Absolute Juveniles of Reserves, or the AJR for short, decides to try to sabotage one of the Bubbling Under Hot 11 members so that he could get on the bench and potentially ruin Chartistan's hopes of an upset win to boost their morale should they make the Cup of Harmony....

THE OTHER BENCH
A parody of The Other Side from The Greatest Show

[Jose Puebes]
Right here, right now
I got a deal in town
Don't want to crash it, know
I know, you're busy
You trade the bench
For a free green paycheck
Go out and get free from the team you're seeing
So trade your old daydreams for a pair of short short jeans
You play with Lucas or just make up excuses
You can stay out with your truck, no need to test your luck
Or just come with me and see
Don't you want to get away from the same old teams you got to play
Cause I got what you seek
Come on with me and take the pledge
Come on over to the other bench
Cause you can do what you do
Or you can be with me
See all the sights, or you'll go and set us free
Oh damn, now your life's not on the edge
Come on over to the other bench

[Liam Barney]
Okay, old pal, no need to mess around
Well I hate to break it but those jeans aren't for me
So thanks, but no
I think you're good to go
I like the same old life you think I don't like
I never heard of you, or that jeans thing you do
You're onto something, it's not a nothing
I live with my old truck, go pour the beer in my cup
I'll have to drink it without you
Don't you know that I'm okay with this Zwangzug team I have to play
Cause I got what I need and I don't want to take the pledge
I don't need to see the other bench
So go and do what you do
I'm good to be like me
No need for sights, and sure no need to set you free
Oh damn, can't you see that there's no edge
I don't need to see the other bench

[Jose Puebes, Liam Barney]
Now this is really how you go and mess around
Team talks in conference rooms, and phones that you pound
If I were to stick with you, I'd be the talk of the town
Face on the TV, stuck as the Musicville clown
But you would finally live a little, finally laugh a little
Just let me give you the freedom to go and it'll
Wake you up and stop your mudslide
Take your walls and fill them with pride
Now that's an deal you like to ride
But guess I'll leave that up to Lucas
Well that's amazing, but to go will cost him greatly
So what percentage of the winnings he'll be taking
Fair enough, he would miss all the affection
I'll give him seven, go and shake and make it happen
He wasn't born last evening, and that seven is too high
Why not go and ask him how much points we will get
So 5!
I'd like 1.
4!
Maybe 2.
3!

[Jose Puebes, Liam Barney, Both]
Don't you want to get away to the brand new teams you got to play
Cause I got what you seek
Come on with me and take the pledge
To the other bench
So if can do what you do
So if can do like me
Forget the sights, cause we'll go and set us free
Oh damn, now our life's not on the edge
We're going to the other bench
So if you do like I do (To the other bench)
So if you do like me (Going to the other bench)
Cause when we do, we're going to the other bench
We're going to the other bench

OOC: Thanks again for Zwangzug for the chance for this team to play against theirs for the second time now! Since the last song parody I did for Chartistan was focused on modern music, I decided to go with something a bit their speed - Musical songs! Yes, The Greatest Show is only around 3 years old, but it's something that I think they'll like.

By the way, all those references to jeans and beer and trucks in the parody? That's because 1, Jose Puebes is based off of Puerto Rican (I think) reggaeton singer Justin Quilles (With his hit song being Jeans, a song about how he likes his girl wearing short jeans, or at least that's what I think he's saying) and 2, Liam Barney is based off of country singer Luke Bryan (A bro country singer, a subgenre of country that focuses heavily on beer and trucks and girls and whatnot).

Oh yeah, and with this RP, Jose Puebes will be on the bench for the rest of the qualification campaign, while Barney is with the AJR.

by **Recuecn** » Wed Jan 27, 2021 4:32 pm

"Look," said Franky. "You know all the steps. You just gotta put it together - get a feel for the flow."

Emanuele grimaced. "It's not clicking." He kicked at the turf with his cleats. "I feel like it shouldn't be this hard."

"Don't stress," said Franky. "It's definitely tricky to learn. I think it always looks easier than it is because the people who do it have already figured it out and know what they're doing. You just gotta keep practicing."

Emanuele groaned.

"Try it again."

Emanuele sighed and rolled the soccer ball back in front of him, then took a couple steps back, pulling it with him.

"Let's go!"

Another grimace was the closest thing Emanuele could force to a smile, as much as he appreciated the encouragement. He leaned forward on his toes and began to jog, tapping the ball in front of him. He dribbled past Franky, then went for the move - outside of the right foot on the left of the ball, followed by - but no, he'd already messed up. Foot too low, the ball had taken too much power and gone spinning out of control.

"A little less power," Franky said. "You're not trying to clear it - you almost want to be lightly grazing it."

Emanuele grumbled as he recovered the ball and turned around.

"I know it's tough, it needs a light touch but super accurate control."

"Yeah, yeah." Emanuele broke into the dribble again. Get ready, step into it, right foot left, over, back - shit. Too much power on the return this time, and the ball bounced off his left ankle and behind him.

"Better!" Franky's tone was upbeat, but Emanuele wasn't sure how something so obviously meant to sound encouraging could sound so terribly condescending.

"Hey, Franky?" It was Heissler. "Gotta question for you."

"I'll be right back," Franky said to Emanuele, then turned and yelled across the field. "Yeah!? What is it!?"

Emanuele sighed in relief and wiped away the sweat dripping into his eyebrows as Franky began to walk away. He was no stranger to an audience, used to pressure, but somehow having his teammate and best friend watching him was more stressful in this moment than messing up in front of his coach or his fans. He took a deep breath; it came a little easier. He went at it again.

Outside right foot inside top left. Over, back, inside over outside. Plant on the left, drag through to the right with the outside - fuck, that was the toe. Right foot outside, over from the left, plant - no. That was wrong. Over with the right, outside to inside, left to right. Bring it back, plant now, but keep control - damn! Emanuele brought himself up short and threw his head back in a huff as he outpaced the ball, leaving it behind him. He threw his head down again and jogged back to it -

"Emanuele! Keep your head up!" That was Bonheur's voice, ringing across the pitch. Did he even know what Emanuele was practicing? It wasn't worth it. Emanuele bit his tongue.

He did it again. Right foot, left to right, back, plant, right again - wait, was that it? That didn't seem right... it wasn't convincing. There was no way that could fool anyone. He did it again. Right foot, over from the inside with the outside of the foot, bring it back, across again on the bottom this time... that was right! Hang on, did he have it? One more time, right foot, through the ball - no, he'd had to be higher on the ball. He tripped over it, almost twisting his ankle, and fell flat on his face, pushing himself up and spitting out grass as the ball rolled away again. The sod tasted alkaline and bitter. Emanuele allowed himself a few choice words.

Franky jogged up again. "Whoa, you alright man?"

"Yeah, whatever."

"How's it coming?"

Emanuele grunted.

"Try it on me," Franky insisted.

Emanuele cocked his head and raised an eyebrow as if to say "If you say so." But he went into it again, with form this time. Head up, eyes on Franky. Each time he tapped the ball forward he sensed its location. He glanced down one time before launching into the move, faking left first, then doubling back to the right, then a final juke to the left, leaving Franky wrong-footed and agape. "You did it, man!" Franky was crowing. "You got the move, but you actually fooled me, too! I thought you were going to go right... I thought you were practicing going right."

"I was, but I figured I should change it up." Emanuele couldn't push back the grin that was starting to steal onto his face and widen into a beaming smile. "Here, let me try it again."

Franky jumped into a defensive stance, knees bent and feet apart, but Emanuele lunged toward him, repeating the double fake but ending this time by sweeping past to his right, Franky's left.

"You got it, man! You got it!" Franky offered a high five which Emanuele couldn't turn down. "I mean I wouldn't stop practicing it, but..." He traced a big checkmark in the air with his finger. "Double elastico: cha-check!"

by **Fluvannia** » Wed Jan 27, 2021 5:06 pm

Takeuchi Park Stadium was hopping. It was fairly small for a soccer stadium -- a capacity of 26,000, not much larger than a good sized hockey arena. It sounded like about three times that many were crammed in at the moment, though.

Daniel Vaudois shook his head. He never much cared for headers, even if he was talented at them, but this most recent had been a doozy even speaking relatively. It was worth a momentary disorientation though, as it had sailed past Pays den haut goalkeeper Pierre-Luc Guérin to put the Blueshirts up 3-0 in a game they desperately needed to win. They had been on a bit of a skid in the qualifiers' second half, and HUElavia had managed to storm back from seven points out to tie the Fluvannians for third. Second-place Recuecn were now themselves seven points ahead. If the Fluvannian squad was to have any chance of pulling off a massive Cinderella story and even moving to the qualifier playoff, they needed the win, and as the game was already in its 77th minute, it looked like they were going to get it.

Unfortunately, the Habitants of Pays den haut did not appreciate the fact that Tadamori Asahiko had been unsolvable at the other end of the pitch, and with this latest strike, the chippy play was beginning to pick up. And so it was that a few minutes later, Vaudois felt an elbow pop him square on the nose as he and one of his opponents both jumped to head a ball in opposite directions of one another. The smell of iron was immediate as said elbow had struck paydirt; the iron taste followed quickly. It wasn't actually a lot of blood, but it flowed quick enough and gave Vaudois something of a macabre mustache.

Now, the Blueshirts were a reasonably well-disciplined team; they weren't exactly highly-ranked, so they had no reason to get nasty when falling short, and having grown up in a hockey-crazed nation weren't keen on the diving and embellishment more prevalent in some other nations. Unfortunately for Vaudois, the lessons subconsciously learned from years spent in the stands watching the Highlanders took over for a moment and he lost his cool. In its place he found the abdomen connected to that offending elbow, wide open for a well-placed left hook. Winded, his mark collapsed, apparently genuinely. Satisfied, Vaudois turned to leave, only to see a fellow in red approaching, yellow card held high, whistle squealing, pointing back and forth between Dan and the guy lying on the ground next to him.

Shit.

by **Graintfjall** » Wed Jan 27, 2021 7:35 pm

Bjørnsson twii throws fuel on fire of short squeeze

A bizarre chapter in Græntfjaller financial history unfolded today as veteran hedge fund investors battled with retail day traders, securities regulators scrambled to understand the pop culture references and profanity-strewn screeds of an online forum whose servers buckled under the strain of new accounts and alleged bot-driven astroturfing – only for a national team footballer to weigh in and add a further twist to the drama. At close of trading, shares in GræntMop [GME], a small brick-and-mortar chain selling cleaning supplies, were up over 9000%; Lime Capital, one of the largest hedge funds in Græntfjall, was seeking an emergency cash injection to cover margin calls in the billions of krónor; and, most worryingly of all, Græntfjall’s national football team was facing the prospect of playing key games that could secure a World Cup qualifying spot missing a crucial player.

The drama began on the online forum, VeggStreetBets (VSB), named after Vegg Street in Háttmark, traditionally the seat of Græntfjaller high finance. Unlike the large institutional investors who call Vegg Street their home, users of VSB tend to be day traders, many of them young university students who use tuition loans to trade on margin. Discourse is frequently crude, with users proudly referring to one another as “kraken-brained”.* Instead of investing in established retail funds, VSB users pride themselves on taking out highly speculative options trades using day trading apps such as Rósmundur Hólmgrímsson** (RH). Users frequently egg each other on to gamble on ‘meme’ stocks; for example, last year, one user proudly posted evidence of staking their entire savings in cardboardbox.com.qi [CBQI], a company selling cardboard boxes to residents of Quemorr Isles. As the Quemorr Isles are inhabited by sapient sealife, the cardboard boxes quickly disintegrated, proving useless. The resulting collapse in value of the company’s stock briefly left said user facing a margin call in the millions of krónor.

A seemingly innocuous research note issued by Lime Capital noted that GræntMop’s antiquated sales model was likely to collapse following the launch of Qardinal Swab Services by online giant Qardinal, which enables business and retail customers to buy cleaning supplies online. With phrases such as “overinvested in physical sales locations”, “haemorrhaging on business rates not offset by commensurate sales” and “with too many employees, many enjoying inflated compensation packages”, the research note argued for an aggressive shorting of GME stock. “It was the tone of the note, with its seeming disregard for the many employees who would lose their jobs should the company collapse,” explained Marcusson Samuelsson investment bank analyst Kristíanna Hildimarsdóttir, “That seemed to fire up the VSB users.”

In response, they began initiating a short squeeze, which drove up the value of the GME stock. Increasing numbers of users visited the forum, asking for advice on downloading trading apps and taking out large options, many of them on margin. Social media became abuzz, and Græntfjaller language twii.tur accounts forced #GMEtothemoon (‘to the moon!’ being a common VSB expression indicating a stock’s value will shoot very high) into the trending spot. Lime Capital responded with increasing aggressive language arguing the merits of their short, while nervous Vegg Street analysts began adding up the total losses in the billions. Politicians and pundits have weighed in on both sides, while treasury minister Vermundur Hallvarðsson and central bank chief Júlíana Kaspersdóttir both admitted they were receiving updates on the situation.

Those defending Lime Capital have argued that the short squeeze is not a response to any change in the long-term fundamentals of GræntMop but merely a bubble driven by irrational investors. “Someone will be left holding the bag,” warned JES Capital head of risk Vilberg Sæmarsson. “And most likely, it will be thousands of retail investors, who’ve been FOMO’d into buying into this craze.” Others have defended VSB users as taking on the might of institutional capital and demonstrating the problems with over-leveraged hedge funds taking out vast short positions. New Energy Græntfall! leader Dani Arhippasbur even used a twii.tur post to suggest that it amounted to “Vegg Street gamblers upset that someone else has found the keys to the casino”. Kaija Michaelsdóttir, leader of the Progressive Liberals, joked that VSB users had accomplished more in a few days than Occupy Vegg Street had in the months they camped out in Háttmark protesting for socio-economic justice.

Enter Bjørnsson, one of the most followed Græntfallers on twii.tur. After playing in the final fifteen minutes of Græntfall’s 4 – 3 win over Quemorr Isles in their World Cup qualifying game, he returned to the changing room and began using his phone to respond to twii.tur posts. When asked by user “kraken_slayer_420” for his opinion, Bjørnsson – known more for crunching tackles than shrewd financial advice – expressed his complete bemusement, but his reply nonetheless quoted the link to the forum from the initial post. From there, traffic snowballed as Bjørnsson’s millions of followers began visiting. It led to VSB moderators temporarily suspending new registrations and closing the forum, at which point GME’s value began crashing. When the forum reopened, GME’s value began climbing again.

Knattspyrnusamband Græntfjalls officials swiftly announced that Bjørnsson had acted improperly, with the major concern being his use of a cellphone from inside the changing room, a serious breach of anti-corruption regulations. As such, he has been immediately suspended for the remaining three matches of Græntfjall’s qualifying schedule and will miss key matches against Sett Forest, Pluvia, and Garbelia. The games could determine whether Græntfjall, rather than Group 9 favorites Nephara, advance to the qualifying playoffs for the World Cup, but will now be played without the defensive midfielder. In the opinion of football journalist Olle Tobiasson, “it’s a big loss”. “There’s no question they had to act quickly, as players using phones in changing rooms is a complete no-no, but it does mean they’ll be playing short of one of their most important impact subs. Bjørnsson has been for some time the guy the Snow Wolves turn to when they need to shut a game down and protect a lead.”

Also in the paper:

NEWS: Unprecedented day on the markets leads to calls for reform, debate, guillotinings
BUSINESS: Rival hedge funds accused of being the “real money” in stock rally
FINANCE: Regulators comb through memes and slurs to uncover the reality of unique community
MUSIC: Famed metal singer Ásgrímur Höðsson claims to be major VSB investor DE4TL0RD
SPORT: Lime Capital’s graph looks like the hill our skiers are currently failing at skiing down

Baggieland – 0 (0)
Osborne; Pennington, McAuley, Moore, Dawson; Brunt, Livermore (55’ Brown ), Regis (51’), Bomber (64’) (66’ Cantello (76’)), Bassett; Richardson (80’ Astle )

Græntfjall – 1 (0)
B. Ernestisson; Vilbertsdóttir, Reynarsson, T. Ernestisson, Lúthersdóttir; Ásvaldursson (78’ Bjørnsson ), Jvarsson (90’ pen.); Heikkisdóttir, Guttisdóttir (60’) (71’ Jonathansdóttir ), Noahsdóttir; Þórhallursson (58’ Rögnvaldursson )

Græntfjall – 4 (4)
B. Ernestisson; Johannesson, Reynarsson, T. Ernestisson, Lúthersdóttir (76’ Bjørnsson ); Ásvaldursson (84’), Jvarsson; Heikkisdóttir, Guttisdóttir (7’, 27’) (87’ Álvgeirsdóttir ), Noahsdóttir; Þórhallursson (9’, 12’) (45’ Jonathansdóttir )

Quemorr Isles – 3 (1)
B. Whale; W. Shark, Barramundi, Tuna, R. Shark; B. Shark, Jellyfish (43’ Plankton ); G.W. Shark (34’, 55’) (57’ Swordfish ), Piranha (14’), Sailfish (72’ pen.), Ray (54’ Megalodon )

* One of the vilest insults in the Græntfjaller language. A significant portion of the letters in response to this column consisted of complaints about the Harbinger printing the term uncensored.
** Named after a mythic hero of Græntfjaller folklore who “stole from the rich to give to the poor” and was then eaten by a kraken.

by **Chromatika** » Wed Jan 27, 2021 9:24 pm

Matchday 14: Arklanda 0-3 Chromatika
ARK: None.; CMT: Hauser '4, Gainsbourg '61, Andisori, K. '82
Starting XI: Fillar, J.; De Saint-Pierre - Rondeau - Baugh - Austic; Marc - Dias (C) - Reynolds; Hauser; Gainsbourg - Thibodeaux.
Substitutes: Kim, M.S. -> Dias ('64), Ingram -> Rondeau ('73), Andisori, K. -> Thibodeaux ('77)
Matchday 15: ZSeparatists 0–2 Chromatika
ZSP: None.; CMT: Marc '48, Croix-Pierre '83
Starting XI: Fillar, J.; De Saint-Pierre - Rondeau - Baugh - Austic; Marc - Dias (C) - Reynolds; Hauser; Gainsbourg - Thibodeaux.
Substitutes: Fillar, B. -> Hauser ('61), Croix-Pierre -> Reynolds ('78), Watt -> Rondeau ('84)

Group 10                                Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Drawkland                             15   12   2   1    40   15  +25    38
 2 Chromatika                            15   12   1   2    48   20  +28    37
 3 United States of Devonta              15   10   2   3    38   18  +20    32
 4 Mavinet                               15    8   3   4    24   19   +5    27
 5 ZSeparatists                          15    7   2   6    32   33   −1    23
 6 Eastfield Lodge                       15    7   0   8    34   36   −2    21
 7 Freechi                               15    7   0   8    19   23   −4    21
 8 Arklanda                              15    3   3   9    19   30  −11    12
 9 Logano Fraza                          15    2   1  12    24   39  −15     7
10 Smosh Games                           15    0   0  15    11   56  −45     0

Remaining Schedule:

Matchday 16:
₁Drawkland (12-2-1, 38) @ ₃United States of Devonta (10-2-3, 32)
₇Freechi (7-0-8, 21) @ ₂Chromatika (12-1-2, 37)

Matchday 17:
₈Arklanda (3-3-9, 12) @ ₃United States of Devonta (10-2-3, 32)
₆Eastfield Lodge (7-0-8, 21) @ ₁Drawkland (12-2-1, 38)
₂Chromatika (12-1-2, 37) @ ₁₀Smosh Games (0-0-15, 0)

Matchday 18:
₉Logano Fraza (2-1-12, 7) @ ₂Chromatika (12-1-2, 37)
₁Drawkland (12-2-1, 38) @ ₄Mavinet (8-3-4, 27)
₃United States of Devonta (10-2-3, 32) @ ₆Eastfield Lodge (7-0-8, 21)

₁Drawkland (12-2-1, 38)
Combined Record of Opponents Remaining: 25-5-15 (WP: 55.6%, PP: 66.7%)
Average Placing of Remaining Opponents: 13/3 = 4.333

₂Chromatika (12-1-2, 37)
Combined Record of Opponents Remaining: 9-1-35 (WP: 20%, PP: 22.2%)
Average Placing of Remaining Opponents: 26/3 = 8.667

₃United States of Devonta (10-2-3, 32)
Combined Record of Opponents Remaining: 22-5-18 (WP: 48.9%, PP: 60%)
Average Placing of Remaining Opponents: 15/3 = 5

What does all this data mean? Well, Chromatika is all but secure. With Drawkland and the United States of Devonta having to play each other, the Chromatiks will likely just have to take care of their own matches. Drawkland, on the other hand, has to face both Devonta and Mavinet in the last three matches. Also, there is this:

1. Chromatika: 12-1-2, 48 GF, 20 GA, 28 GD; 37 Points
2. Kelssek: 12-1-2, 39 GF, 20 GA, 19 GD; 37 Points
3. Squornshelous: 12-1-2, 44 GF, 27 GA, 17 GD; 37 Points
T4. Riena: 10-4-1, 26 GF, 11 GA, 15 GD; 34 Points
T4. TJUN-ia: 11-1-3, 39 GF, 24 GA, 15 GD; 34 Points
T6. Poafmersia: 11-1-3, 46 GF, 32 GA, 14 GD; 34 Points
T6. Huayramarca: 10-4-1, 33 GF, 19 GA, 14 GD; 34 Points
T6. New Lusitania: 11-1-3, 39 GF, 25 GA, 14 GD: 34 Points

What does this mean? Well, this World Cup, the top three teams to finish in second place automatically qualify, while the other sixteen will have to play in a home-and-away playoff. With the best Goal Differential among the highest point earners, Chromatika can actually drop a full match and still likely have the best Goal Differential amongst the teams three points behind. It's... Very good.

However, given the combined record of their opposition, they shouldn't have any issue, right?

World Cup Qualifiers, Part 8: The Dinner
Many thanks to Banija for his input.

It had been a fruitful hourlong visit with The Skilled and The Hope. They'd drawn up a plan of communication to allow The Light and Celebrity to see each other while making sure that they don't go anywhere near temporal zones. It would be difficult, but not impossible; also, The Skilled had promised to ask The Physician about compatibility between the species to see if there should be any precautions that needed to be made.

Then, Keri Wyse Aart looked at her watch.

"Oh! Is that the time? I'm sorry, my friends, but I need to head off to a dinner. We're honoring the great Ms. Xollie Lubabalo before she leaves back to Banija to pursue a domestic career."

"The Banijan?" commented The Skilled, "The one that helped you so much?"

Keri nodded, then posed sheepishly, "Do you want to meet her?"

"Meet another nation's humans?" stated The Hope, furrowing her eyes, "Are you sure that'd be wise?"

"It's just one human," added Keri, "She's been our greatest ally in our fight for democracy, and might end up being higher up their society someday."

The two Enlightened looked at each other and nodded.

"Sure," said The Skilled.

Keri held up a hand and walked to the dining hall, where Xollie Lubabalo was waiting. The esteemed ambassador had the Checkered Cross on her lapel, clad in her gomesi, that same legendary gomesi that had become such a symbol in Chromatika's fight for democracy.

The Banijan stood up and offered a hand, saying, "Thank you for having me, Premier."

"Of course, Ambassador," answered Keri Wyse Aart, "Though honestly it's just us, you can drop the formalities."

At that, Xollie smiled a bit brighter.

"It's been a true pleasure serving here, with you," stated the Banijan. Her time had been eventful, fruitful, and successful. Chromatika and Banija had become fairly close during her stay as Ambassador, and it was with a much stronger bond that she was leaving the country.

"Who'll we have to replace you? Hopefully nobody too abrasive," commented the Premier. It was the biggest worry in Keri's mind. Banija was becoming one of Chromatika's closest allies in the Glorious Southwest region of Atlantian Oceania, though efforts were being made to make connections with the Commonwealth of Baker Park, Qasden, Starblaydia, and even Valanora. The days of Chromatika only dealing with the Northeast were over, though renewed focus in relations with Quebec was being headed up by the Chromatik Football Federation while trade routes were continuing to be instituted with Cosumar, Eshan, and Audioslavia.

"Dr. Kekoto Mansaré is a consummate professional," assured Xollie evenly, "Though we don't see eye to eye on everything, he's a gentleman's gentleman who will make sure to represent the Kingdom's interests here without issue. He's worked in foreign affairs in Equestrian States, and played a huge part in our hosting of the last Olympics. His organization skills are excellent. Also, just between you and me, he's a dog nut. Owns three Rhodesian ridgebacks and loves them to death. Oh, and you can bet I will brief him personally before he gets here later this month."

Keri laughed at that, "Good, good. We'll miss you dearly, both the nation, my family, and myself. Heidi is already asking me when she can go visit Jacob and Kizza in Hoima, and Luuk wants us to go to a Hoima Warriors game with Jjemba, if you can believe that. You are the defending World Champions, after all."

"I'm sure that that can be arranged," answered Xollie, "With your term coming to an end soon and all."

"I think we'll have the vote on the term limits finalized by next week," answered Keri, "The RP (Rainbow Party) seems hell bent on capping it at two, which is probably good - ten years under anyone's leadership is long enough."

"If elected again, would you serve?" posed Xollie. Keri was an earnest woman, but one who was showing the stress of leadership.

Keri sighed before answering, "Not sure. Maybe. Depends on what the Party wants... And if Heidi and Jackson would be okay with their mom being tied up for another five years. I'm not sure how much more of my children's lives I want to miss."

"Your kids love you! You're a great mother," exuded Xollie.

Keri changed the subject. "Before you go, actually, there are two people I want you to meet. Two people who've actually agreed to meet with you."

Xollie raised an eyebrow. "Oh?"

"Your remember our first election?" said Keri, "Remember how I told you afterward that we had some outside help?"

"Yes," stated Xollie, "The news said something about beings of light? That's as far as I can gleam from the press."

"That's on purpose. However, the being - called The Enlightened - would like to pay their respects before you go," explained Keri.

Xollie Lubabalo, Banijan Ambassador to Chromatika, stood up in surprise as two angelic beings, wings outstretched and eyes glowing, entered from the other chamber.

Both bowed formally, with Xollie bowing in return.

And that was how the first human not from Chromatika met The Enlightened from the Plane of Possibility.

Chromatik Team for WC Qualifying - Matchday 16 vs. Freechi @ The Islander Dome, Myana, Myana Island and Matchday 17 @ Smosh Games
Predicted Starting XI: Descombes; Watt - Odling - Ingram - Nocturne; Kelly (C) - Kim, M.S. - Han; Hauser; Gainsbourg - Toussaint.
Reserves: Alexander, Ria; Xiao, de Aea, Anderson, Rowles; Humphreys, Larriet-Cortes, Croix-Pierre; Kim, M.J.; Andisori, K., Vidal.

by **Indusse** » Wed Jan 27, 2021 10:11 pm

IFA NEWS NETWORK
Unstable Indusse; Evil Margaret

Indusse 3–3 Pluvia and the Saxean Isles
Garbelia 2–3 Indusse
Group 9                                 Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 South Covello                         15   11   2   2    33   13  +20    35
 2 Græntfjall                            15    9   4   2    29   18  +11    31
 3 Indusse                               15    8   5   2    36   23  +13    29
 4 Nephara                               15    8   5   2    29   18  +11    29
 5 Kandorith                             15    7   6   2    26   21   +5    27
 6 Baggieland                            15    4   3   8    31   33   −2    15
 7 Pluvia and the Saxean Isles           15    3   3   9    25   38  −13    12
 8 Garbelia                              15    3   1  11    20   35  −15    10
 9 Sett Forest                           15    2   4   9    15   29  −14    10
10 Quemorr Isles                         15    2   3  10    22   38  −16     9

Some wise man in the past once said "Every dog has a day.", Do they mean that creatures other than dogs won't have a day or did they compare Humans with the Canines? The Wise men of Girubaluhian Tribes always are in a confusion. They are known for such wise and hard to think questions. The Girubaluhian Tribe is one of the busiest tribes in the world. The Tribal men and women, young and old are always busy and doesn't have time to rejoice or have fun. But, the fact is that they are the most laziest tribes in Indusse. Lazy and Busy? What are the doing? They are too busy thinking about things. Thinking won't make their body move, just think and think and think till the death. What about food? They eat their food while thinking. Who knows whether they are thinking that they had already eaten food? That's weird, isn't it? If not, it is for me. What questions are they thinking and trying to find answers. So, the tribal chief was approached. The Tribal cheif was called Gulugurudurus IV, he was also sitting there and thinking. When he was approached by someone asking about Questions he would point out to a paper. The Paper read "Everyone is busy thinking, we don't have time to talk. Join us on thinking and finding the following answers!." What questions are these? The first one is similar. Why does Every dog has a day?. Only one member of the tribe could find the answer but alas, as he was going to visit the chief to say the answer he fell into the drainage in the village. The Drainage was so stinky and suffocating that the member died at the spot. The Questions never end for them, starting from Why does Humans exist? It stretches to the realm of immortality. They ask was Chicken created before egg or is it the reverse?, Why is dinosaurs getting extinct even before Humans devastated them? Why in the world is Margaret Evil?. The final question is the best from everything. Why is Margaret Evil? Now, let us take Indusse. When Indusse defeats someone or the other in a match then, Margaret is evil to the opposition. When Indusse loses to some team in another match then, Margaret is evil for Indusse. When Indusse and its opponent draws a match, Margaret is on the maximum streak. Her evil powers are being showered upon the both squads. She is evil for the both teams. What can we understand from this? Its simple, Margaret is always evil. The Evil Goddess. Margaret is a familiar figure in Indusse after indusse started in the sports sector. Margaret is of two forms in Indusse. One is the classic normal one spread across the world, the other one is known as Margarita Diabolus, a form of Devil who's but a goddess. Margarita Diabolos is the evil side of Margaret. Margarita Diabolos translates to Margaret the Devil. Margarita is found carrying a scythe and rubber chickens. Diabolos had haunted the Indussean national team last matches.

Indusse drew against Pluvia and Saxean Isles for a score of three against three. The Pluvian players played well astonishing Indusseans. The match saw a Pluvian Supremacy. In the first half the game ended with Pluvia leading for two against one. The only goal for Indusse was by Baskar Kumar in the thirty second minute. The second half had been the game changer, the team could have played better if so, they could have secured a easy win against Pluvia and the Saxean Isles. In the fifty nineth minute, Baskar H Kumar sprinted up again scoring another goal for Indusse. A goal which helped in equilising the scores. The Saxeans weren't ready to give up, as usual. " Indusse isn't the old Indusse now, we have changed" said Baskar Kumar to the reporters after the match. The Match went by having Pluvia scoring their lead goal in the eighty second minute. It was something which isn't acceptable for Indusse. Indusse was going to lose, perhaps get disqualified. But, Margaret isn't that much evil. Diabolos hasn't grown to her full power. Within two minutes, Indusse's young player Goblin Grundjee swifted towards the post and kicked the ball in. The ball went in and smashed the hand of the Goalkeeper. The Goal Keeper was hurt by wasn't of a big concern. That goal saved Indusse the match ended 3-3. The next Matchday against Garbelia was a goof one, a good sound victory against Garbelia was enough for Indusse. The match started with Garbelians Attacking like Mad Bulls. They scored their first goal in the fifteenth minute and continue their counter attacks. According to the stats, Indusse could only have a touch with the ball after the nineth minute. Whole Nine Minutes, the ball was under Garbelian possession. In the thirty sixth minute of the game, Mersiás sprinted forward to the goal post and tried to kick a goal in. But the goalkeeper saved it successfully. The ball was passed to a Garbelian defender but, for the sake of Margarita Diabolos the ball was snatched from them by Mersiás. Mersiás just turned around and kicked once again, it went in for the equilizer everyone was waiting for. Indusse one-one Garbelia. The match continued, with Garbelians trying to score another goal. But none went inside and that was just the end of the first half. The second half started it was a total Indussean half. Indusse had eighty two percent of Possession of ball. A run here another there, everyone was running here and there. When will we win? Everyone thought. At that moment, Baskar H Kumar drifted off and fell down. He didn't think anything else he jumped up and kick the ball into Mersiás. Mersiás passed it to Goblin Grundjee and Grundjee gave it to Bechun Butea. Bechun took the ball up and jumped and smashed the header in. Indusse leads! Two against One! The Match wasnt over, the game continued Garbelians suffocated due to the intense running that was caused by Indusse. Indusse scored their third goal in the eighty seventh minute. It was Budtedjson. He was given a long pass from the center by Baskar Kumar. He didn't think anything after getting the ball in his legs, a kick inside and it went to be a quick goal. Indusse leads three against one. Now Garbelians trying to attack like a tiger who has lost its teeth and claws. But in the ninety nineth minute they scored their second goal from a Miss Pass. But that wasn't enough. The game ended Indusse three-two Garbelia. The Victory was with Indusse.

Continuation of the Interview with Baskar Kumar. Show more...
Natalie: So, The Story seems to be interesting. Aliens, Kids and Weapons...

BHK: Ofcourse, yes! After all it was mine. I would say that you take a read now.

Natalie: But I don't have it right now.

BHK: Oh, wait! I have it, I'll get a read

Natalie: Wow! Okay then, Focus!

BHK: The Small Story is Titled " Gaspillage Adventures". Gaspillage means Garbage or waste. Both are almost similar. Now let us look at the story.

Gaspillage Adventures

One Fine day in the city of Kirkisham lived a boy called Donald. Donald Miskiev he was called, he lived in the city with his brother in a small double storey house. His Brother, Steve was a doctor at a village hospital two miles away from the city. Donald loved Science and achieved excellent grades in his exams. Eventhough his brother is a doctor, he is paid very low. Due to the bad economic conditions in his house, he wasn't able to continue his studies. His brother taught him what he knew in the free time, but proper education was no where near. Nowadays, he sits in his home and spends time watching science fiction movies and researching on Extra Terrestrials and Unidentified Flying Objects. He is also fond of Basketball and visits the nearby indoor sports court often.
As usual, the day went by. Donald was busy with his work and as soon as it got finished he went to the basketball court near his house. He met his friends Mourchi and Sedgwick in the court. Three of them with the others played Basketball in the court. Suddenly a huge blast was heard. The Roof of the Sports Center collapsed. A Oval shaped mysterious flying object with green lights around it landed in the court. It was a
In a shape of a oval cup saucer. It had a inscription on it saying " NKG-63". Everyone there was startled, they ran helter skelter. Donald couldn't move a inch, he felt paralysed. He stood at the same spot and suddenly another loud sound was heard. The Flying Saucer slowly opened and a bright flashing light was emitted from it.

To be continued..

by **Xanneria** » Wed Jan 27, 2021 11:04 pm

Big Win! Big goals! Big Stars!
source - http://www.xtrasports.xan/nationalteam.htm

XANNERIA - It was a game that could have been a trap, Ask Baker Park, Bonbohk U Piche got crushed at our stadium. A 6-2 victory is one of the biggest throttling given by the Maroons since the 7-2 victory over Starcom Racing in the prior cycles Campianato Esportiva. Kyle Falcon again showed off his talents with a double goal game, and had another assits. Carlton Brower, and Andre Gasey got in on the action after Gasey came in to replace the resting Falcon, with Brower getting two and Gasey one, with the last score of the day on a penelty kick that Bray Feltzer took . Gasey had a spectacular one as he got an amazing angle on it that arched perfectly into goal but managed to go completely over the head of the goalkeeper who admittedly played the ball way to shallow. Mookie Danube played a fine game only once getting out of position and once giving up trouble on a Penelty kick, and tyhankfully he remembered to play longer than 89:59 this time stopping a last second BUP score. Next up is a key game versus Electrum, who may be with out their star "Sentient Ball of Energy" whose been dealing with side effects of a Tungstein Pizza.

XANNERIA - 6
Brower 8' 55'
Feltzer 15'
Falcon 39'
Gasey 77'

BONBOHK U PICHE - 2
TBA 30'
TBA 63'

Tough fought point!
source - http://www.xtrasports.xan/nationalteam.htm

ELECTRUM - Electrum has always been a trap game since the last time we played them. Looking for the Maroons to hold on by scoring any points possible by winning a game or tieing up Electrum would be key to the teams survival. Electrum came out hot and despite leading Forward SEB out after indigestion cause be a new Tungstein Pizza addiction, Ronald McCourtney has picked up slack. He went off on the poor Maroons int he first 15 minutes of the game picking up both goals. McCourtney looked strong but in the end he was evened up by the stronger Kyle Falcon, Falcon came in with a bright intensity matching that of the sentient ball of energy and put a point on the standings for the Maroons when his late, extra time penalty kick on the result of a redcard enducing tackle by Einarsson, King of the Armoured Bears. In the end the one point keeps the Maroons afloat and Still with an outside shot at making it into the World cup directly.

Xanneria - 2
Falcon 78' 90+2 (PK)

Electrum - 2
McCourtney 4' 13'

by **Northwest Kalactin** » Wed Jan 27, 2021 11:35 pm

Regional Qualifiers MD 12&13
OOC: These results are not real, this is a simulation
OOC 2: I missed the last MD, here are the results that were supposed to be posted.
MD12

AO Group 1
Farfadillis 3–2 Krytenia
Khytonya 3–5 Qasden
Ibixa 0–2 Tioguldos
Legalese 2–2 Freeport

   AO Group 1                           Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Qasden                                11    8   1   2    29   11  +18    25
 2 Farfadillis                           10    8   0   2    16    7   +9    24
 3 Krytenia                              11    7   2   2    14    7   +7    23
 4 Tioguldos                             11    7   0   4    14   11   +3    21
 5 Turori                                10    6   1   3    16    6  +10    19
 6 Freeport                              10    4   4   2    11    9   +2    16
 7 Khytonya                              11    1   2   8     8   23  −15     5
 8 Legalese                              11    0   3   8    13   27  −14     3
 9 Ibixa                                 11    0   1  10     2   22  −20     1

AO Group 2
Valanora 0–1 Siovanija and Teusland
Pluvia and Saxean 1–3 Mavinet
Bonbohk u Piche 1–4 Barunia
Netop 0–0 Gyatso-Kai

   AO Group 2                           Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Mavinet                               11    8   1   2    26   12  +14    25
 2 Valanora                              10    7   1   2    13    4   +9    22
 3 Siovanija and Teusland                11    6   3   2    26   12  +14    21
 4 Ko-oren                               10    6   2   2    18   12   +6    20
 5 Gyatso-Kai                            10    4   4   2    13   10   +3    16
 6 Barunia                               11    4   3   4    17   12   +5    15
 7 Netop                                 11    4   1   6    14   17   −3    13
 8 Pluvia and Saxean                     11    1   1   9     9   24  −15     4
 9 Bonbohk u Piche                       11    0   0  11     6   39  −33     0

AO Group 3
Banija 2–0 Equestria
Fjorsz 0–1 Maccian
Sett Forest 0–1 Busoga Islands
Quakmybush 2–1 Euran Oceania Territories

   AO Group 3                           Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Banija                                10    8   2   0    25    9  +16    26
 2 Busoga Islands                        11    7   2   2    17   10   +7    23
 3 Equestria                             11    6   2   3    24   19   +5    20
 4 Audioslavia                           10    6   1   3    19   13   +6    19
 5 Maccian                               11    5   1   5    16   17   −1    16
 6 Quakmybush                            11    4   1   6    19   22   −3    13
 7 Euran Oceania Territories             10    4   0   6    19   21   −2    12
 8 Fjorsz                                11    1   3   7    12   22  −10     6
 9 Sett Forest                           11    1   0  10     6   24  −18     3

AO Group 4
Starblaydia 2–0 Flavovespia
Muralos 0–1 Northwest kalactin
Wreckeria 0–2 Twicetagria
Savigliane 1–1 Saltstead

   AO Group 4                           Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Mriin                                 10    8   2   0    25   13  +12    26
 2 Starblaydia                           10    7   2   1    18    6  +12    23
 3 Flavovespia                           11    7   1   3    19   12   +7    22
 4 Northwest kalactin                    11    6   3   2    13    6   +7    21
 5 Saltstead                             10    5   1   4    14   15   −1    16
 6 Savigliane                            11    3   3   5    16   16    0    12
 7 Twicetagria                           11    3   3   5    11   12   −1    12
 8 Wreckeria                             11    1   0  10     5   21  −16     3
 9 Muralos                               11    0   1  10     5   25  −20     1

AO Group 5
Vilita 3–0 Chromatika
Jabal Ahkdar 0–1 Independent Athletes from Quebec
Cosumar 0–3 Blouman Empire
Hapilopper 1–1 Huayramarca

   AO Group 5                           Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Commonwealth of Baker Park            10    8   2   0    24    9  +15    26
 2 Vilita                                10    7   1   2    28   13  +15    22
 3 Independent Athletes from Quebec      11    7   1   3    21   12   +9    22
 4 Chromatika                            11    5   3   3    24   14  +10    18
 5 Hapilopper                            11    4   3   4    14   17   −3    15
 6 Blouman Empire                        11    4   2   5    10   11   −1    14
 7 Huayramarca                           10    3   3   4    17   14   +3    12
 8 Cosumar                               11    2   0   9     4   29  −25     6
 9 Jabal Ahkdar                          11    0   1  10     6   29  −23     1

Rushmore Group 1
Pasarga 1–0 Electrum

   Rushmore Group 1                     Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Pasarga                                6    6   0   0    12    3   +9    18
 2 Electrum                               5    2   0   3     8    7   +1     6
 3 Eastfield Lodge                        4    2   0   2     5    6   −1     6
 4 Darmen                                 5    1   1   3     7    8   −1     4
 5 San Ortelio                            4    0   1   3     3   11   −8     1

Rushmore Group 2
Savojarna 0–1 Yuezhou

   Rushmore Group 2                     Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Savojarna                              6    4   1   1    12    4   +8    13
 2 Yuezhou                                5    4   0   1     8    2   +6    12
 3 Crystalline Caverns                    4    2   0   2     6    8   −2     6
 4 Valladares                             5    1   1   3     5    7   −2     4
 5 Govournauch                            4    0   0   4     0   10  −10     0

Rushmore Group 3
Eura 2–0 Oberour Ar Moro

   Rushmore Group 3                     Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Eura                                   6    5   1   0    14    2  +12    16
 2 Oberour Ar Moro                        5    3   0   2     7    5   +2     9
 3 Nagore                                 4    2   0   2     5    6   −1     6
 4 Sargossa                               5    1   1   3     5    5    0     4
 5 Nacaltora                              4    0   0   4     1   14  −13     0

Rushmore Group 4
Cassadaigua 4–1 Tikariot

   Rushmore Group 4                     Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Cassadaigua                            6    5   1   0    16    4  +12    16
 2 Tikariot                               5    2   2   1     5    4   +1     8
 3 Astograth                              5    2   1   2     3    4   −1     7
 4 Southwest Eastnorth                    4    1   0   3     5    7   −2     3
 5 Simulland                              4    0   0   4     1   11  −10     0

Rushmore Group 5
Nephara 1–0 Plane of Possibility

   Rushmore Group 5                     Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Nephara                                6    5   0   1    12    3   +9    15
 2 Graintfjall                            5    3   0   2    10    5   +5     9
 3 Plane of Possibility                   5    2   1   2     4    6   −2     7
 4 Mytanija                               4    0   2   2     5   10   −5     2
 5 Hispinas                               4    0   1   3     7   14   −7     1

Indies Group 1
Caryton 0–3 New Lusitania
Terre Septentrionale 2–0 Indusse
Melbergia 2–4 Emastalia
North Alazia 0–1 Icecliff
T Republic 0–0 TBS

   Indies Group 1                       Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Terre Septentrionale                  12   10   1   1    35    8  +27    31
 2 New Lusitania                         12    8   1   3    24   10  +14    25
 3 Emastalia                             12    6   2   4    23   16   +7    20
 4 Indusse                               12    5   4   3    19   15   +4    19
 5 T Republic                            12    4   4   4     6   12   −6    16
 6 Melbergia                             12    4   3   5    14   25  −11    15
 7 Icecliff                              12    3   3   6    10   14   −4    12
 8 TBS                                   12    2   5   5    12   20   −8    11
 9 Caryton                               12    2   3   7     8   20  −12     9
10 North Alazia                          12    2   2   8     9   20  −11     8

Indies Group 2
Beepee 0–4 Poafmersia
Drawkland 2–2 Juvencus
Widaya 0–1 Murphtannia
U-koro 2–0 Hebitaka
Cirrus Azale 3–3 UAC

   Indies Group 2                       Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Drawkland                             12   10   1   1    30   15  +15    31
 2 Murphtannia                           12   10   0   2    30    7  +23    30
 3 Poafmersia                            12   10   0   2    27    9  +18    30
 4 Juvencus                              12    8   2   2    21    9  +12    26
 5 Cirrus Azale                          12    4   1   7    16   26  −10    13
 6 UAC                                   12    3   2   7    15   22   −7    11
 7 Hebitaka                              12    2   3   7    13   27  −14     9
 8 U-koro                                12    2   2   8     8   18  −10     8
 9 Beepee                                12    2   2   8    18   34  −16     8
10 Widaya                                12    2   1   9     7   18  −11     7

Indies Group 3

Waisnor 4–4 Al-Qurija
Abanhfleft 3–0 Bluecliff
Trolleborg 1–0 Freechi
Stevid 2–3 Garifunya
State of Trinity 0–3 Squidroidia

                         Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Abanhfleft             12   10   1   1    25    9  +16    31
 2 Squidroidia            12    7   4   1    21    7  +14    25
 3 Garifunya              12    7   3   2    28   15  +13    24
 4 Freechi                12    7   2   3    24   16   +8    23
 5 Trolleborg             12    7   1   4    21   16   +5    22
 6 Bluecliff              12    5   2   5    18   18    0    17
 7 Waisnor                12    2   3   7    16   25   −9     9
 8 Stevid                 12    2   2   8     9   24  −15     8
 9 Al-Qurija              12    1   3   8    12   24  −12     6
10 State of Trinity       12    0   3   9    11   31  −20     3

Indies Group 4
Trigel 0–3 Geektopia
Zwangzug 6–0 Darkmania
Hafamarimet 0–4 Megistos
Cascadia 0–1 PSTCT
Quemmor Isles 0–1 St. Domingues

   Indies Group 4                       Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Megistos                              12   10   0   2    37   10  +27    30
 2 Zwangzug                              12    9   2   1    32   10  +22    29
 3 Geektopia                             12    9   1   2    26   10  +16    28
 4 Darkmania                             12    6   1   5    17   20   −3    19
 5 St. Domingues                         12    4   3   5    14   19   −5    15
 6 PSTCT                                 12    3   5   4    15   20   −5    14
 7 Trigel                                12    4   1   7    14   25  −11    13
 8 Quemmor Isles                         12    4   1   7    11   23  −12    13
 9 Hafamarimet                           12    3   1   8     8   23  −15    10
10 Cascadia                              12    0   1  11     6   20  −14     1

Indies Group 5
Smosh Games 0–1 Jeruselem
Kandorith 2–2 Kohnhead
Hindu RR 1–3 Sulsuland
Aepreleh 3–1 Ranoria
West Angola 1–0 Mexi Catcha

   Indies Group 5                       Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Kandorith                             12   10   2   0    28    8  +20    32
 2 Sulsuland                             12    9   0   3    31   12  +19    27
 3 Kohnhead                              12    8   3   1    25   13  +12    27
 4 Jeruselem                             12    8   2   2    23    5  +18    26
 5 Aepreleh                              12    4   0   8    17   27  −10    12
 6 Mexi Catcha                           12    3   3   6    15   25  −10    12
 7 West Angola                           12    2   5   5    11   18   −7    11
 8 Smosh Games                           12    3   2   7    13   24  −11    11
 9 Ranoria                               12    2   1   9    15   24   −9     7
10 Hindu RR                              12    1   2   9     8   30  −22     5

Indies Group 6
Gothina Isles 0–1 Squornshelous
Kelssek 3–1 Sharktail
Tornado Queendom 0–1 Balqia
Magnecia and Galmencia 2–0 Chartistan
North Japan 2–1 Mand Blustopia

   Indies Group 6                       Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Kelssek                               12   11   1   0    29    5  +24    34
 2 Sharktail                             12    9   1   2    23    9  +14    28
 3 Squornshelous                         12    8   1   3    21    9  +12    25
 4 Mand Blustopia                        12    7   0   5    21   17   +4    21
 5 Balqia                                12    6   3   3    16   14   +2    21
 6 North Japan                           12    4   2   6    17   21   −4    14
 7 Magnecia and Galmencia                12    2   2   8    11   23  −12     8
 8 Chartistan                            12    1   4   7     9   20  −11     7
 9 Gothina Isles                         12    2   1   9     9   24  −15     7
10 Tornado Queendom                      12    1   3   8     6   20  −14     6

Indies Group 7
Garbellia 1–5 Port Ember
Mercedini 1–1 Squornshelan Remnant States
Critical Operations 0–1 Rangers FC
Regmotto 3–2 Fluvannia
Socialist New Britain 0–1 Sannyamathaland

   Indies Group 7                       Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Port Ember                            12   11   1   0    31    8  +23    34
 2 Rangers FC                            12    8   3   1    26    7  +19    27
 3 Mercedini                             12    8   2   2    27   11  +16    26
 4 Squornshelan Remnant States           12    5   4   3    17   12   +5    19
 5 Sannyamathaland                       12    3   3   6    12   21   −9    12
 6 Fluvannia                             12    4   0   8     9   21  −12    12
 7 Socialist New Britain                 12    3   2   7    14   21   −7    11
 8 Regmotto                              12    3   1   8    14   26  −12    10
 9 Critical Operations                   12    3   1   8    12   25  −13    10
10 Garbellia                             12    2   3   7    17   27  −10     9

Indies Group 8
Pays Den Haut 3–0 Omerica
HUElavia 0–0 Devonta
Frezza 1–2 Baggieland
Logano 2–5 Transvolcanic
Silvedana 2–3 Rwezakaland

   Indies Group 8                       Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Devonta                               12    9   3   0    24    9  +15    30
 2 Baggieland                            12   10   0   2    20    7  +13    30
 3 HUElavia                              12    9   2   1    23    9  +14    29
 4 Transvolcanic                         12    8   2   2    35   15  +20    26
 5 Pays Den Haut                         12    4   2   6    20   22   −2    14
 6 Rwezakaland                           12    4   1   7    16   23   −7    13
 7 Frezza                                12    3   2   7    16   25   −9    11
 8 Omerica                               12    2   2   8    11   27  −16     8
 9 Silvedana                             12    1   3   8    14   27  −13     6
10 Logano                                12    0   3   9    14   29  −15     3

Indies Group 9
Lorrana 1–4 TJUN-ia
The Holy Empire 4–2 Acronius
Pemecutan 0–0 Havynwilde
Norish Jeia Repa 1–2 Arklanda
Red Kelp 5–5 Armed King

   Indies Group 9                       Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 The Holy Empire                       12   10   2   0    30   10  +20    32
 2 Acronius                              12    7   3   2    23   11  +12    24
 3 Havynwilde                            12    6   5   1    24    9  +15    23
 4 TJUN-ia                               12    5   5   2    20   11   +9    20
 5 Pemecutan                             12    5   3   4    13   12   +1    18
 6 Arklanda                              12    4   5   3    15   17   −2    17
 7 Norish Jeia Repa                      12    2   2   8    11   23  −12     8
 8 Lorrana                               12    1   4   7    10   23  −13     7
 9 Red Kelp                              12    1   4   7    17   32  −15     7
10 Armed King                            12    0   5   7    12   27  −15     5

Indies Group 10
Thibaea 0–2 Tequilo
The Sarian 2–2 Sajnur
Acastanha 0–1 ZSeparatists
Yerapia 0–1 Treekidistan
Central Shaneville 3–2 United Pink States

   Indies Group 10                      Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Tequilo                               12    9   3   0    27    8  +19    30
 2 Sajnur                                12    9   1   2    31   11  +20    28
 3 The Sarian                            12    7   5   0    25   10  +15    26
 4 ZSeparatists                          12    7   3   2    16   11   +5    24
 5 Treekidistan                          12    4   2   6    16   22   −6    14
 6 United Pink States                    12    3   3   6    15   26  −11    12
 7 Central Shaneville                    12    2   4   6     7   14   −7    10
 8 Yerapia                               12    2   4   6    18   27   −9    10
 9 Thibaea                               12    2   1   9    12   26  −14     7
10 Acastanha                             12    2   0  10     7   19  −12     6

Game of the Day: Drawkland 2–2 Juvencus
In a “Sonnel Showdown Game”, Juvencus and Drawkland played in a game where Drawkland needed to win to stay on top. They tied, although some good luck kept them on top, 2 teams are now within striking distance of them with only a few match days left to play. Their next few games will decide weather the kick corps qualify or not.

MD13

AO Group 1
Freeport 3–0 Ibixa
Tioguldos 1–0 Khytonya
Qasden 1–2 Farfadillis
Krytenia 1–1 Turori

   AO Group 1                           Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Farfadillis                           11    9   0   2    18    8  +10    27
 2 Qasden                                12    8   1   3    30   13  +17    25
 3 Krytenia                              12    7   3   2    15    8   +7    24
 4 Tioguldos                             12    8   0   4    15   11   +4    24
 5 Turori                                11    6   2   3    17    7  +10    20
 6 Freeport                              11    5   4   2    14    9   +5    19
 7 Khytonya                              12    1   2   9     8   24  −16     5
 8 Legalese                              11    0   3   8    13   27  −14     3
 9 Ibixa                                 12    0   1  11     2   25  −23     1

AO Group 2
Gyatso-Kai 1–1 Bonbohk u Piche
Barunia 3–1 Pluvia and Saxean
Mavinet 0–2 Valanora
Siovanija and Teusland 3–1 Ko-oren

   AO Group 2                           Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Mavinet                               12    8   1   3    26   14  +12    25
 2 Valanora                              11    8   1   2    15    4  +11    25
 3 Siovanija and Teusland                12    7   3   2    29   13  +16    24
 4 Ko-oren                               11    6   2   3    19   15   +4    20
 5 Barunia                               12    5   3   4    20   13   +7    18
 6 Gyatso-Kai                            11    4   5   2    14   11   +3    17
 7 Netop                                 11    4   1   6    14   17   −3    13
 8 Pluvia and Saxean                     12    1   1  10    10   27  −17     4
 9 Bonbohk u Piche                       12    0   1  11     7   40  −33     1

AO Group 3
Euran Oceania Territories 2–0 Sett Forest
Busoga Islands 2–0 Fjorsz
Maccian 0–1 Banija
Equestria 1–2 Audioslavia

   AO Group 3                           Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Banija                                11    9   2   0    26    9  +17    29
 2 Busoga Islands                        12    8   2   2    19   10   +9    26
 3 Audioslavia                           11    7   1   3    21   14   +7    22
 4 Equestria                             12    6   2   4    25   21   +4    20
 5 Maccian                               12    5   1   6    16   18   −2    16
 6 Euran Oceania Territories             11    5   0   6    21   21    0    15
 7 Quakmybush                            11    4   1   6    19   22   −3    13
 8 Fjorsz                                12    1   3   8    12   24  −12     6
 9 Sett Forest                           12    1   0  11     6   26  −20     3

AO Group 4
Saltstead 1–0 Wreckeria
Twicetagria 3–0 Muralos
Northwest kalactin 2–4 Starblaydia
Flavovespia 1–4 Mriin

   AO Group 4                           Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Mriin                                 11    9   2   0    29   14  +15    29
 2 Starblaydia                           11    8   2   1    22    8  +14    26
 3 Flavovespia                           12    7   1   4    20   16   +4    22
 4 Northwest kalactin                    12    6   3   3    15   10   +5    21
 5 Saltstead                             11    6   1   4    15   15    0    19
 6 Twicetagria                           12    4   3   5    14   12   +2    15
 7 Savigliane                            11    3   3   5    16   16    0    12
 8 Wreckeria                             12    1   0  11     5   22  −17     3
 9 Muralos                               12    0   1  11     5   28  −23     1

AO Group 5
Huayramarca 0–0 Cosumar
Blouman Empire 3–1 Jabal Ahkdar
Independent Athletes from Quebec 1–4 Vilita
Chromatika 2–2 Commonwealth of Baker Park

   AO Group 5                           Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Commonwealth of Baker Park            11    8   3   0    26   11  +15    27
 2 Vilita                                11    8   1   2    32   14  +18    25
 3 Independent Athletes from Quebec      12    7   1   4    22   16   +6    22
 4 Chromatika                            12    5   4   3    26   16  +10    19
 5 Blouman Empire                        12    5   2   5    13   12   +1    17
 6 Hapilopper                            11    4   3   4    14   17   −3    15
 7 Huayramarca                           11    3   4   4    17   14   +3    13
 8 Cosumar                               12    2   1   9     4   29  −25     7
 9 Jabal Ahkdar                          12    0   1  11     7   32  −25     1

Rushmore Group 1
Eastfield Lodge 2–2 Pasarga
Electrum 0–0 Darmen

   Rushmore Group 1                     Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Pasarga                                7    6   1   0    14    5   +9    19
 2 Electrum                               6    2   1   3     8    7   +1     7
 3 Eastfield Lodge                        5    2   1   2     7    8   −1     7
 4 Darmen                                 6    1   2   3     7    8   −1     5
 5 San Ortelio                            4    0   1   3     3   11   −8     1

Rushmore Group 2
Crystalline Caverns 0–1 Savojarna
Yuezhou 2–1 Valladares

   Rushmore Group 2                     Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Savojarna                              7    5   1   1    13    4   +9    16
 2 Yuezhou                                6    5   0   1    10    3   +7    15
 3 Crystalline Caverns                    5    2   0   3     6    9   −3     6
 4 Valladares                             6    1   1   4     6    9   −3     4
 5 Govournauch                            4    0   0   4     0   10  −10     0

Rushmore Group 3
Nagore 1–5 Eura
Oberour Ar Moro 0–1 Sargossa

   Rushmore Group 3                     Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Eura                                   7    6   1   0    19    3  +16    19
 2 Oberour Ar Moro                        6    3   0   3     7    6   +1     9
 3 Sargossa                               6    2   1   3     6    5   +1     7
 4 Nagore                                 5    2   0   3     6   11   −5     6
 5 Nacaltora                              4    0   0   4     1   14  −13     0

Rushmore Group 4
Southwest Eastnorth 0–0 Cassadaigua
Tikariot 0–2 Astograth

   Rushmore Group 4                     Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Cassadaigua                            7    5   2   0    16    4  +12    17
 2 Astograth                              6    3   1   2     5    4   +1    10
 3 Tikariot                               6    2   2   2     5    6   −1     8
 4 Southwest Eastnorth                    5    1   1   3     5    7   −2     4
 5 Simulland                              4    0   0   4     1   11  −10     0

Rushmore Group 5
Mytanija 1–3 Nephara
Plane of Possibility 1–0 Graintfjall

   Rushmore Group 5                     Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Nephara                                7    6   0   1    15    4  +11    18
 2 Plane of Possibility                   6    3   1   2     5    6   −1    10
 3 Graintfjall                            6    3   0   3    10    6   +4     9
 4 Mytanija                               5    0   2   3     6   13   −7     2
 5 Hispinas                               4    0   1   3     7   14   −7     1

Indies Group 1
T Republic 0–1 Caryton
TBS 0–2 North Alazia
Icecliff 0–3 Melbergia
Emastalia 0–5 Terre Septentrionale
Indusse 1–1 New Lusitania

   Indies Group 1                       Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Terre Septentrionale                  13   11   1   1    40    8  +32    34
 2 New Lusitania                         13    8   2   3    25   11  +14    26
 3 Indusse                               13    5   5   3    20   16   +4    20
 4 Emastalia                             13    6   2   5    23   21   +2    20
 5 Melbergia                             13    5   3   5    17   25   −8    18
 6 T Republic                            13    4   4   5     6   13   −7    16
 7 Icecliff                              13    3   3   7    10   17   −7    12
 8 Caryton                               13    3   3   7     9   20  −11    12
 9 North Alazia                          13    3   2   8    11   20   −9    11
10 TBS                                   13    2   5   6    12   22  −10    11

Indies Group 2
Cirrus Azale 2–0 Beepee
UAC 1–1 U-koro
Hebitaka 0–2 Widaya
Murphtannia 2–5 Drawkland
Juvencus 1–0 Poafmersia

   Indies Group 2                       Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Drawkland                             13   11   1   1    35   17  +18    34
 2 Murphtannia                           13   10   0   3    32   12  +20    30
 3 Poafmersia                            13   10   0   3    27   10  +17    30
 4 Juvencus                              13    9   2   2    22    9  +13    29
 5 Cirrus Azale                          13    5   1   7    18   26   −8    16
 6 UAC                                   13    3   3   7    16   23   −7    12
 7 Widaya                                13    3   1   9     9   18   −9    10
 8 U-koro                                13    2   3   8     9   19  −10     9
 9 Hebitaka                              13    2   3   8    13   29  −16     9
10 Beepee                                13    2   2   9    18   36  −18     8

Indies Group 3 
State of Trinity 1–0 Waisnor
Squidroidia 4–0 Stevid
Garifunya 1–0 Trolleborg
Freechi 1–0 Abanhfleft
Bluecliff 1–1 Al-Qurija

                         Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Abanhfleft             13   10   1   2    25   10  +15    31
 2 Squidroidia            13    8   4   1    25    7  +18    28
 3 Garifunya              13    8   3   2    29   15  +14    27
 4 Freechi                13    8   2   3    25   16   +9    26
 5 Trolleborg             13    7   1   5    21   17   +4    22
 6 Bluecliff              13    5   3   5    19   19    0    18
 7 Waisnor                13    2   3   8    16   26  −10     9
 8 Stevid                 13    2   2   9     9   28  −19     8
 9 Al-Qurija              13    1   4   8    13   25  −12     7
10 State of Trinity       13    1   3   9    12   31  −19     6


Indies Group 4
Quemmor Isles 1–0 Trigel
St. Domingues 1–0 Cascadia
PSTCT 1–3 Hafamarimet
Darkmania 1–2 Geektopia

   Indies Group 4                       Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Megistos                              13   10   1   2    37   10  +27    31
 2 Geektopia                             13   10   1   2    28   11  +17    31
 3 Zwangzug                              13    9   3   1    32   10  +22    30
 4 Darkmania                             13    6   1   6    18   22   −4    19
 5 St. Domingues                         13    5   3   5    15   19   −4    18
 6 Quemmor Isles                         13    5   1   7    12   23  −11    16
 7 PSTCT                                 13    3   5   5    16   23   −7    14
 8 Trigel                                13    4   1   8    14   26  −12    13
 9 Hafamarimet                           13    4   1   8    11   24  −13    13
10 Cascadia                              13    0   1  12     6   21  −15     1

Indies Group 5
West Angola 0–0 Smosh Games
Mexi Catcha 2–2 Aepreleh
Ranoria 0–1 Hindu RR
Sulsuland 0–3 Kandorith
Kohnhead 1–3 Jeruselem

   Indies Group 5                       Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Kandorith                             13   11   2   0    31    8  +23    35
 2 Jeruselem                             13    9   2   2    26    6  +20    29
 3 Sulsuland                             13    9   0   4    31   15  +16    27
 4 Kohnhead                              13    8   3   2    26   16  +10    27
 5 Aepreleh                              13    4   1   8    19   29  −10    13
 6 Mexi Catcha                           13    3   4   6    17   27  −10    13
 7 West Angola                           13    2   6   5    11   18   −7    12
 8 Smosh Games                           13    3   3   7    13   24  −11    12
 9 Hindu RR                              13    2   2   9     9   30  −21     8
10 Ranoria                               13    2   1  10    15   25  −10     7

Indies Group 6
North Japan 1–2 Gothina Isles
Mand Blustopia 1–0 Magnecia and Galmencia
Chartistan 3–3 Tornado Queendom
Balqia 0–4 Kelssek
Sharktail 1–1 Squornshelous

   Indies Group 6                       Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Kelssek                               13   12   1   0    33    5  +28    37
 2 Sharktail                             13    9   2   2    24   10  +14    29
 3 Squornshelous                         13    8   2   3    22   10  +12    26
 4 Mand Blustopia                        13    8   0   5    22   17   +5    24
 5 Balqia                                13    6   3   4    16   18   −2    21
 6 North Japan                           13    4   2   7    18   23   −5    14
 7 Gothina Isles                         13    3   1   9    11   25  −14    10
 8 Chartistan                            13    1   5   7    12   23  −11     8
 9 Magnecia and Galmencia                13    2   2   9    11   24  −13     8
10 Tornado Queendom                      13    1   4   8     9   23  −14     7

Indies Group 7
Socialist New Britain 0–0 Garbellia
Sannyamathaland 2–0 Regmotto
Fluvannia 2–1 Critical Operations
Rangers FC 1–1 Mercedini
Squornshelan Remnant States 1–0 Port Ember

   Indies Group 7                       Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Port Ember                            13   11   1   1    31    9  +22    34
 2 Rangers FC                            13    8   4   1    27    8  +19    28
 3 Mercedini                             13    8   3   2    28   12  +16    27
 4 Squornshelan Remnant States           13    6   4   3    18   12   +6    22
 5 Sannyamathaland                       13    4   3   6    14   21   −7    15
 6 Fluvannia                             13    5   0   8    11   22  −11    15
 7 Socialist New Britain                 13    3   3   7    14   21   −7    12
 8 Garbellia                             13    2   4   7    17   27  −10    10
 9 Regmotto                              13    3   1   9    14   28  −14    10
10 Critical Operations                   13    3   1   9    13   27  −14    10

Indies Group 8
Silvedana 0–2 Pays Den Haut
Rwezakaland 4–1 Logano
Transvolcanic 4–0 Frezza
Baggieland 1–2 HUElavia
Devonta 2–1 Omerica

   Indies Group 8                       Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Devonta                               13   10   3   0    26   10  +16    33
 2 HUElavia                              13   10   2   1    25   10  +15    32
 3 Baggieland                            13   10   0   3    21    9  +12    30
 4 Transvolcanic                         13    9   2   2    39   15  +24    29
 5 Pays Den Haut                         13    5   2   6    22   22    0    17
 6 Rwezakaland                           13    5   1   7    20   24   −4    16
 7 Frezza                                13    3   2   8    16   29  −13    11
 8 Omerica                               13    2   2   9    12   29  −17     8
 9 Silvedana                             13    1   3   9    14   29  −15     6
10 Logano                                13    0   3  10    15   33  −18     3

Indies Group 9
Red Kelp 1–2 Lorrana
Armed King 1–0 Norish Jeia Repa
Arklanda 0–3 Pemecutan
Havynwilde 0–0 The Holy Empire
Acronius 0–2 TJUN-ia

   Indies Group 9                       Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 The Holy Empire                       13   10   3   0    30   10  +20    33
 2 Havynwilde                            13    6   6   1    24    9  +15    24
 3 Acronius                              13    7   3   3    23   13  +10    24
 4 TJUN-ia                               13    6   5   2    22   11  +11    23
 5 Pemecutan                             13    6   3   4    16   12   +4    21
 6 Arklanda                              13    4   5   4    15   20   −5    17
 7 Lorrana                               13    2   4   7    12   24  −12    10
 8 Norish Jeia Repa                      13    2   2   9    11   24  −13     8
 9 Armed King                            13    1   5   7    13   27  −14     8
10 Red Kelp                              13    1   4   8    18   34  −16     7

Indies Group 10
Central Shaneville 3–0 Thibaea
United Pink States 1–2 Yerapia
Treekidistan 0–3 Acastanha
ZSeparatists 1–2 The Sarian
Sajnur 1–0 Tequilo

   Indies Group 10                      Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Sajnur                                13   10   1   2    32   11  +21    31
 2 Tequilo                               13    9   3   1    27    9  +18    30
 3 The Sarian                            13    8   5   0    27   11  +16    29
 4 ZSeparatists                          13    7   3   3    17   13   +4    24
 5 Treekidistan                          13    4   2   7    16   25   −9    14
 6 Central Shaneville                    13    3   4   6    10   14   −4    13
 7 Yerapia                               13    3   4   6    20   28   −8    13
 8 United Pink States                    13    3   3   7    16   28  −12    12
 9 Acastanha                             13    3   0  10    10   19   −9     9
10 Thibaea                               13    2   1  10    12   29  −17     7

Game of the Day: Megistos 0–0 Zwangzug
And just as we though they had their group locked up, Zwangzug falls behind to third place in their group, behind newcomers Megistos and Geektopia. This tie for Zwangzug does not help them, and even though they have a relatively easy schedule ahead of them, they cannot expect an easy route to qualification.

by **Electrum** » Thu Jan 28, 2021 3:39 am

The Turnip: Unclear Whether Reports Involving The Electrum National Football Team Match Reports Are Actually Real or Just Made Up
by Primmy Primmy Primrose, citizen journalist

It has been a strange few cycles for Electrum. Before the time anomaly we were the belle of the ball, winning World Cup 78 and then having impressive runs deep into the World Cups thereafter. But after the fact? No. No such success. We've not even come close to qualifying, not even once. And what's worse is that we're allegedly ruled by a fifth dimensional being that we know little about. Our team is full of fantastical creatures from wonderous dimensions and yet we never get any information about them, where they've come from or anything like that. It's just day after day of mind-numbing flag reviews, wacky news, and satirical articles.

Enough. We demand an explanation. We want a return to normality. What about the Electrum football team is real? Or fake?

By the way, does anyone remember just a few cycles ago we suddenly had a bear-king and a sentient energy ball on the team? What was that all about? Utter absurdity. Lends credence to the idea that the Electrum football team doesn't exist at all. Or if it does, that worldwide football as we know it does not exist. We live in a universe with rules. Where eternally youthful elves, devout monks from a different realms and (for some reason) ponies can play football. A big rolling egg playing for Electrum? That's a bit much. Makes us think that we are part of a greater network. Perhaps we are the result of a neural network spitting out words as a result of a random input, and we're just here to make sense of the output that gets spit out.

Let's have a look at the nonsense that has arisen in this cycle. Take the match against Vdara and Xanneria. There have already been two documented reports of the Sentient Energy Ball (named SEB) eating a tungsten pie, by the Vdaran and Xannerian presses respectively. Leaving aside the fact that pure energy balls shouldn't discriminate between different types of matter to consume, how does one craft a tungsten pizza? One does not cover a cheese and tomato pizza base with several conveniently sliced pieces of tungsten right over there next to the pepperoni. Seriously, this is a story that can only be made up by a bunch of creative individuals looking to pump out a quick story, or several monkeys chained to a typewriter.

And what about The Turnip article where there was mention of the Android Bird being head-butted from behind by the sentient energy ball, electrifying its rectum and causing it to go into some sort of nirvana-overdrive where it scored a goal from just past the halfway line. And that came from The Turnip. It's plausible and farcical enough to have possibly happened in real life. But it sounds so satirical that it could have also been made up. That is, after all, what The Turnip is all about. The lines and boundaries between reality and satire are blurring.

Let's also not forget Einarsson, King of the Armoured Bears, inexplicably causing a red card in the dying minutes of the last match? He's a cool armoured polar bear, he claims he can't be tricked by humans. He's too cool for you. Would such a fella be the type to king hit a Xannerian player? We'll leave that for you to judge, but clearly there are higher powers at work. It's almost as if these chain of extraordinary events can be linked to Electrum's return after our time freeze. Perhaps our time freeze was pre-ordained. Perhaps none of this is real, football has no meaning, and we're all going to die soon. Woah.

You be the judge. Do you really think all that is happening really happened?

by **Murphtannia** » Thu Jan 28, 2021 3:46 am

Draw and a win assert Murphtannia as 'Best out of a bad bunch'

Murphtannia’s quest for 6th continues, however it is looking increasingly unlikely. Murphtannia would have to win their next 3 games by a total 18 goals, and hope that Sajnur loses their next 3 games, which based off current form is unlikely to happen.

Murphtannia went into the away game to Rwekazaland hoping for a win, needing one to capitalize on Sajnur’s loss to Geektopia earlier that evening, however it was not to be, Rewkazaland opened the scoring in the game in the 24th minute from a controversial penalty, however Jenkin’s header in the 65th minute equalised the game and gave Murphtannia hope, until the game ended 1-1.

At the start of the next game, away to Silvedania, Murphtannia heard the news that Sajnur had beaten Recuen 2-1, an unexpected result that put pressure onto the Murphtannian team, they had to win to try and keep a 6th placed finish alive.

Murphy went with the usual lineup, however Elliott seemed to have cemented his spot at RWB and Saunders seemed to have secured his spot alongside Murphy up front.

Murphy held a last minute team talk, which seemed to really fire up the players, before the game kicked off, and Murphtannia got off to a terrible start.

In the 5th minute of the game Cinam Onerj, with the use of some impressive footwork, managed to dis-posses Cartlidge, and exploiting the mountains of defence created by the full back running forward, worked their way into the box and blasted the ball top bins.

Murphtannian couldn't have asked for a better response though, In the 10th minute Elliott picked up the ball, and sprinting down the wing, whipped it in for Cartlidge to head home, equalising and making up for his previous mistake.

Then in the 35th minute, Murphtannia had been dominating the game, and Murphy picked up the ball, he beat one defender, then another, and then another before chipping the ball over the head of Auguste Connor and into the back of the net. After proving to the team why he was still top dog, Murphy sprinted into the stands to celebrate with fans.

The first half ended Murphtannia 2-1 Silvedania.

The second half started the same way the First Half ended, with Murphtannia dominance. With Silvedania rarely getting any time on the ball, it was only a matter of time until Murphtannia scored again.

Which became apparent, after some brilliant hold up play by Murphy, Saunders was played in, after nut-megging Arthur Fabeck, he slotted the ball home to make it 3-1.

Then Saunders picked up the ball after an excellent goal kick from Ball, using a quick turn and burst of pace, Bassot was left for dead as Saunders blasted it into the top right hand corner to make it 4-1 to Murphtannia in the 64th minute.

Silvedania added a bit of anxiety in the 70th minute however, with Isaac Guilbert taking a pot shot from outside of the box, and it actually going in to make it 4-2.

Finally, in the 87th minute any chance of a Silvedania comeback ended when Saunders played in after a brilliant through ball from Styler, to smash it into the middle of the net for his hat trick, his first in his career.

As the game ended hope was high for Murphtannia, maybe, just maybe they could achiev

by **Blouman Empire** » Thu Jan 28, 2021 4:35 am

THE EMPIRE TIMES

Poor Start Leads to Great Finish

Blouman Empire boss Lewis Parry was frustrated by his side's "sloppy start” but praised their "brilliant football" as they remained within 2 points of 2nd place in the World Cup qualifiers with a comeback victory over bottom of the group Simulland.

Luke Cousin’s double ensured the visitors brought home the desperately needed 3 points but it came after a horror start and a late scare. Goalkeeper Henry Polinoir gifted the home side an opener after five minutes when forward Sam Jones blocked his clearance, allowing David Rollan to tap it in. Paul Miller missed a glorious chance to make it 2-0, which proved costly as Parry’s side dominated for much of the match against the winless side. Cousins equalised after 26 minutes, his powerful strike from Ty Freltron’s through ball giving Adam Ramsey no chance. Nathanial Launzel scored his first international goal collecting Freltron’s pass and beating Ramsey at the second attempt. And Cousins appeared to have made things comfortable ten minutes after the break by shooting under the diving Ramsey following a swift counter attack. But there was late concern when Jones headed in from a corner for the hosts with three minutes left, and Polinoir then saved Rollan’s shot.

"We played some brilliant football between their first goal and their second goal - the end was a bit too uncomfortable for my liking, as well as the start being sloppy and slow" Parry said. The victory keeps the Empire on third spot, nine points off 1st but with four games remaining it is looking increasingly less likely they will top the group. The win does, however, keep them within two points of second and Parry’s side will no doubt be looking to move ahead of Quebec and go through to the second round of qualifiers.

The baffling aspect of last night’s win is that despite picking up their ninth win it isn’t the first time the side has gone behind in what should have been easy games. It is almost as if complacency creeps in before they show what they can do. In this case, it was a woeful piece of play between Polinoir and Jason Potts after five minutes, with the goalkeeper hesitating before Rollan to score Simulland’s 10th goal of the qualifiers. But it appeared to galvanise the visitors, who could have scored four or five goals before the break. Cousins was their chief tormentor, ably supported by Freltron and Lanuzel in midfield. Once the latter had finally got on the scoresheet, he then helped set up Cousins to score his second of the game.

It was Simulland’s 13th loss of the qualifiers and and having been outclassed for much of the match by the Eagles’ swift attacking play, the last 10 minutes showed the group that they will continue to fight and force opposing sides to secure a win

THE EMPIRE TIMES

Zilva Scores Winner

Lincoln Zilva scored the winner on his first start of the of the qualifiers as the Eagles notched up their ninth win of the qualifiers being one of 3 group members still able to qualify for the group.

Zilva, who had not played for 4 matches found the net with a superb header eight minutes from time in Sylestone last night. The Eagles took the lead after just 20 seconds by Luke Cousins. Sylstone’s improvement after half-time was rewarded by an excellent equaliser. But Zilva’s strike kept the Eagles in the hunt for a World Cup berth and while needs to rely on 1st and 2nd to lose the last three games to finish top are still only 2 spots shy of making into the 2nd round of the qualifiers.

The Eagles had issues with flights to Sylestone and some baggage went missing affecting their preparation for the match but after the hassle the visitors raced off the blocks through Cousin’s rapid strike and continued to have the better of the first half, posing a constant threat on the break. However, Sylestone grew into the game at the end of the opening 45 minutes, improved further after a half-time rejig and were rewarded with an equaliser.

Pushed back, the Eagles immediately stepped up and it was Zilva looking to put the side back in front. After seeing a header cleared off the line by the Sylestone keeper, it was another header, from a wonderful cross supplied by Ryan Hunter was no chance of being saved. The win marks the 9th for the Eagles as they continue to hope to progress into the World Cup proper.

Sylestone welcomed the Eagles with their campaign all but over and if they were still looking at competing at a game to game basis the early signs were not promising. From a Sylstone kick-off, a long ball saw their forward outmuscled by John Miller, with Isaac Cupstran collecting the ball to square for the free Cousins, who finished from an angle. Sylestone were disjointed and toothless but the half-time intervention breathed life into the team. A substitute was introduced to provide a threat up front, while their centre midfield was released to play further forward. It was the midfielder’s deep cross that provided the goal, their striker energetically nipping in ahead of the dithering Jason Potts to poke a smart finish inside the post. Sylestone were dominant, the Eagles pushed back - yet the home side could not create another goal

"It was a game of little margins in the end," said Blouman manager Luke Parry. “We managed to get ahead very early on which was our saviour but they took us to the end of the match”. With only three matches left the Eagles will need to ensure every game is won to have any chance of qualifying hosting North Alezia for the first of the three at Stadium Bloumany

by **Frestovenia** » Thu Jan 28, 2021 4:52 am

The story of Olaf Artvikker

These are good days for the national team of Frestovenia. The team has started well in the second part of the qualifiers. Five of the last six matches have been won, which can be called remarkable in a group in which Frestovenia was seen as the absolute underdog. The times of underestimation and jokes are gone and finally, the team is performing against the top of the world. Frestovenia surprised with victories over Barunia, Squidroidia, and Wreckeria. Where do the successes come from? Let's find out in todays topic.

Todays topic is about the most talented player Frestovenia knows at the moment. His name is Olaf Artvikker the captain of the national team and top scorer in this qualification cycle. Olaf currently plays for the club Asvard FK in the highest league in the country called the Elatteligan. As a little boy, he played for the youth team of Asvard FK. He was allowed to train and even play matches with the big boys. That's not very common in modern football. Olaf was born in the Aturu district of Asvard and grew up with two younger brothers. His father was also a well-known footballer and played for a club that currently plays matches in the second tier of the nation. A very sporty family you can say, but where does Olaf Artvikkers exceptional talent come from? Frestovenia is not known for its top sport athletes. Olaf really is an exception.

National team call-up

Two months before the qualifiers for the World Cup, Olaf was called up to train with the national team. A big moment for Olaf because the national team was only just founded and a first official match had to be played yet. Olaf did not hesitate for a moment and joined the selection right away. Alrik Valatanen, who has just been appointed as national coach, was very pleased with the super talent. "He can make a difference when it really comes down to it" says the coach. "I give him a guarantee for the future, this player will become a very big one". Those are very nice words from the coach and if we have to believe him, Olaf will make its debut on the big stage someday, maybe even qualifying for a World Cup. As much as we love to see this happen, we first have to look at how this team performs and whether they can become and remain consistent in their way of play. The same goes for Olaf, but there are no doubts about him as of now.

Debut

Just before the start of the qualifiers, two friendly matches were organized against Lorrana and Muralos. Olaf made his debut against Lorrana, but could not really show his qualities in these two matches. The first official match against Lorrana at the Asvard Stadium ended in a disappointing draw. Palrikken was the only one to score a goal on the Frestovenian side (1-1). Two days later, they lost against Muralos (0-2) in an away match. Olaf told Fresto Sports that the preparations were good, but that he could not find his way of play yet. He hated that, because he knew that the first qualifying matches would come soon. "I am very disappointed with what I've shown in the friendly matches, I feel responsible for the whole team and hopefully we can find answers fast before the qualifiers start" says Olaf in an interview with Fresto Sports. Olaf wants to do the best he can and that sketches his character. He really wants to put everything in this team and himself. He acts like a second coach and leader.

First wins first defeats

Artvikker scored his first goal in the qualifier against the Tornado Queendom. With a header, he found the goal just before half-time after that Gajetser already signed for the 1-0 three minutes earlier. The game at home was won 2-0 and was the first victory for the national team. In the match that followed against the team of Icecliff. Frestovenia won 8-2 and surprised the opponent with this monster score. Olaf scored a hattrick in this match and already scored 4 goals out of two matches. Olaf said after the match, "Even without having information about the opponent we can change our game plan and win matches". After two wins, the Frestovenians lost five matches in a row against Barunia (6-3), Kelssek (1-2), Squidroidia (3-1), Wreckeria (1-2), and Darmen (2-0). "I was surprised that we were still able to come along so well with these top teams. Of course they were much stronger on the pitch, but they gave us many opportunities and we had the chance to even take a result here and there" says Olaf.

Series of surprises

Here we are after a few rounds of matches. Olaf Artvikker keeps scoring and scoring goals. He tops the topscorers table in this group and Gajetser (don't forget him) follows him. Jabal Akhdar was beaten (4-1) with Artvikker adding two more goals to his tally. The real big successes are yet to come. After two victories in the second half of qualifying against the Tornado Queendom (1-5) and Icecliff (0-3), the team won its first match against one of the top sides in this group. In the first match against Barunia, the Frestovenians lost 6-3 at their ground, now the tables have turned. Frestovenia won the match against Barunia at home with 2-0. Both goals came from the legend himself Olaf Artvikker. Frestovenia had to visit Kelssek and lost by one goal difference. In the last two matches, the Frestovenians did what they didn't do in the first clashes with Squidroidia and Wreckeria and that is winning. The chances of qualifying for the World Cup are gone, but a surprising mid-table ranking in this group is still up for grabs. Next up Darmen and Jabal Akhdar!

X Frestovenia 2 - 0 Tornado Queendom
X Frestovenia 8 - 2 Icecliff
X Barunia 6 - 3 Frestovenia
X Frestovenia 1 - 2 Kelssek
X Squidroidia 3 - 1 Frestovenia
X Frestovenia 1 - 2 Wreckeria
X Darmen 2 - 0 Frestovenia
X Frestovenia 4 - 1 Jabal Akhdar
X Valanora 3 - 1 Frestovenia
X Tornado Queendom 1 - 5 Frestovenia
X Icecliff 0 - 3 Frestovenia
X Frestovenia 2 - 0 Barunia
X Kelssek 1 - 0 Frestovenia
X Frestovenia 2 - 1 Squidroidia
X Wreckeria 0 - 1 Frestovenia
X Frestovenia v Darmen
X Jabal Akhdar v Frestovenia
X Frestovenia v Valanora
Upcoming matches

Frestovenia v Darmen
@Asvard Stadium, Asvard

Jabal Akhdar v Frestovenia
@Emir Abdul Hakeem al-Masri Stadium, Al Jarmah

by **Squidroidia** » Thu Jan 28, 2021 6:12 am

The final whistle blew from the Asvard National Stadium. The Squidroidian national team had sealed their fate with a 2-1 loss against the home side in Frestovenia. They will not qualify for the World Cup. Even if they won against the Asvard Boys, as Squidroidian fans called them, Kelssek's win meant that they didn't have a choice. This game, a game where, even with Hideo's magic, Olaf Artvikker captained his side to knocking out the Top 100 ranked Inklings from the finals in Taeshan and Ethane. Like what the Poafmersian press said about this Group 11, it was literally over. Kelssek and Valanora would likely make the World Cup, leaving Squidroidia, Darmen and all the others to go soul searching in a Cup of Harmony with Nephara and Eura.

It was a story of hardships just to get to this point. Ryūzaki Mito's job as manager of the national team was placed in doubt when the team lost to Megistos in the IAC, a tournament that saw Poafmersia become a solid dominant team in the rest of international football. Now, with this elimination coming at the hands of a team who the Inklings should have beaten, even with him guiding Squidroidia to a higher position than last time around (So far, anyway), he was on thin ice. He still had the rest of the World Cup, a trip away to Baruna, the home finale against Kelssek and the campaign closer against the Tornado Queendom, to play, but his hopes of another cycle with Squidroidia hinged on a decent campaign in the Cup of Harmony. In order to secure his job for IAC 12 and World Cup 88, he had to, at the very least, guide Squidroidia into the knockouts. Even then, of course, he could still be sacked and replaced with a new manager, international or otherwise. In that case, he would have to guide the team one step closer. Because let's be honest, would Squidroidia win a Cup of Harmony with Nephara and Eura participating? No.

The seat was getting hot for the current manager, having managed the national team from the first friendly all the way up to now. An Inklings side without Mito as their manager would be unprecedented. A managerial change hasn't happened at the national level before, but he was managing to walk on the tightest of tightropes, where one slip could cost him his job. His entire career managing the Squidroidian national team could end in a heartbeat. With the Squidroidian FA's hands getting closer to the button, maybe it was the right call to try to find a new man to lead the ship. As much as Mito guided the team to where it was now, getting closer and closer to qualifying for a World Cup, his setup wasn't considering any attacking midfielders, midfielders on either flank, heck, not even wingbacks. A national team willing to experiment not like the TFI team Mito managed, but one willing to experiment with formations other than the accustomed 4-3-3, could work out brilliantly in the end. It just had to depend on the guy. Or girl. Or sentient kitchen appliance.

Alternative Universe W87CQR
5 games to go.

Squidroidia were chasing hope in FFI Group 3. Entering the home stretch of qualification, 5 games left before the playoffs were to begin, the Inklings were 3 points behind group leaders Abanhfleft, who held the only key to the kingdom. And even then, the key might be a fake, unable to open the door to Taeshan and Ethane. What was worse, however, was the competition. Garifunya, the current holders of the Unofficial World Championship, were just 1 point behind Squidroidia, and Freechi were 2 points behind. Trolleborg and Bluecliff League have a long shot to get to the World Cup now, but they are still eligible too - Trolleborg is 9 points behind Abanhfleft and could easily bounce back provided they don't get more upsets, and Bluecliff League were 13 points behind, needing to win every game from now to the final day (As well as hope everybody else falls off a ledge) to possibly qualify. It was not over by a long shot.

Squidroidia, however, were about to take on the top 2 seeds in their group before the qualifiers began - On Matchday 14 they were to go to Trolleborg, who they drew 3-3 to in Inkopolis. The bigger game, however, was to happen the next day. Abanhfleft, at home, in Inkopolis. With the Inklings and their attack, aided by the genius Ryūzaki Mito has been doing throughout the qualifiers, a win against Abanhfleft would mean they would top their group, provided they won against Trolleborg or drew with them and hoped that Abanhfleft dropped points, not on head to head (As the Inklings lost at the away leg), but on goal difference, provided the Inklings win by 1 If they win by 2 or more, however, they would seal head to head goal difference advantage over Abanhfleft, and if the 2 are tied on the same points once the Squidroidians survived Freechi, the Inklings would have a chance to qualify - Or if everything goes right automatically qualify - for the first time in their history, in just their second attempt.

If Squidroidia were to upset Abanhfleft, however, it wouldn't be over. A lead in qualification in a top-heavy group like FFI Group 3 (Indies Group 3 for the Omericans out there who despise the FFI, and for good reason) could easily be squandered. Al-Qurija would be the team the Inklings were to play in Matchday 16, but the final 2 matchdays, the home closer against the Bluecliff League and an away trip to Freechi to end it off, could mean life or death, qualification or no qualification. With a group so tight heading into the final 5 games, Squidroidia can't afford to drop a single point, or else they would not qualify.

Again, the FFI (Sorry Omericans, I meant Indies) qualification process was group winners only - 10 groups, 7 spots. Top 4 group winners qualify automatically, the rest go into a playoff round for the final 3 spots. 4 + (6/2) = 7. A number loved by Sonnel and the World Cup Committee. As the group winners stand, here's what the standings look like now.

Indies Group Winners                    Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Kelssek                               13   12   1   0    33    5  +28    37 - Auto-Qualify
 2 Kandorith                             13   11   2   0    31    8  +23    35 - Auto-Qualify
 3 Terre Septentrionale                  13   11   1   1    40    8  +32    34 - Auto-Qualify
 4 Port Ember                            13   11   1   1    31    9  +22    34 - Auto-Qualify
----
 5 Drawkland                             13   11   1   1    35   17  +18    34 - Playoff
 6 The Holy Empire                       13   10   3   0    30   10  +20    33 - Playoff
 7 Devonta                               13   10   3   0    26   10  +16    33 - Playoff
 8 Megistos                              13   10   1   2    37   10  +27    31 - Playoff
 9 Sajnur                                13   10   1   2    32   11  +21    31 - Playoff
10 Abanhfleft                            13   10   1   2    25   10  +15    31 - Playoff

There Abanhfleft are, in dead last when it comes to group winners. As things stand they would play Drawkland in the playoff round for a spot in the World Cup, while The Holy Empire would play Sajnur and Megistos would play Devonta for a chance to qualify for the first time in their history. Kelssek, Kandorith, Terre Septentrionale and Port Ember would automatically qualify. That's how brutal FFI (Indies) Group 3 is. If Squidroidia were to make up the gap and stay there, things might change - Maybe they would get a higher seed when it comes to the playoffs or make the show no matter what if they do well enough to qualify automatically. Nothing is for certain. 5 games to go, and anything could happen.

Now everybody's eyes were on Abanhfleft. For them it's a "Do not slip now" moment, dropping points would almost certainly mean their end when it comes to qualifying, unless the other teams were to slip up and hand them the lead back. The Fleftic people were still going to cheer them on, because unlike last qualifiers, they have a chance. A chance to join the rest of the world and qualify for the biggest tournament for the first time in a bit. Win every single game and they're through. Don't slip up against Squidroidia and they're through. Don't choke away leads and they're through.

Don't. Look. Down.

by **Hebitaka** » Thu Jan 28, 2021 7:31 am

Eliminated for sure

With the most recent results coming out in the world cup Qualifiers, it is determined that the rising falcons, as of now, has no chance of playing in the final 32 of the 87th world cup. The team has registered it's 5th victory in the world cup with the most recent victory against State of Trinity at home in a comfortable score of 2-0, one goal coming from N Masake and one goal from B Tiltankara. Apart from this was the other game against Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom, which ended up as a loss of 2-1, one goal for the falcons coming from the star Vijay while the likes of Rawic from Zeta Reka scored both the goals. With all the going tension, the World Cup has Hebitaka out for sure, making it the fifth team to be eliminated from the seventeenth group and the 64th team to be eliminated(for sure) from the World cup Qualifiers. The fans, though already knew this sort of result, are disappointed. The players are slowly giving up and are getting ready for the CoH if they get a chance, or the Soccer League A, which is going to start the third season soon now.

Group 17 current stand

Currently the 17th group is in quite the rampage. The lower five teams i.e. the 6th placed Hebitaka, 7th placed Khytonya, 8th placed Balqia, 9th placed State of Trinity, and the 10th placed Widaya. All the teams above has a chance and are in the fight for the top two positions in the group. Zeta Reka and Heugeltadom is the team just above Hebitaka in rank and 7 points above them. The team has only lost three games in the league compared to Hebitaka's 6 losses yetand are just 11 points behind the table toppers. Just above them is the Tequilo National team who have the same number of points as the Zeta Rekans, just ahead due to the goal difference. Above them are Tikariot and Newmanistan both of whom are 7 point ahead of the 4th and 5th placed teams. Tikariot is ahead out of these two due to the score difference. And above all sitting are the fan favorites in this group, Vilita. The team that once drew with the low key team of Hebitaka has made a great comeback taking in multiple victories after that shit of a game, and are currently unbeaten with 10 won matches, which is by the way, double of the total matches won by the falcons.

by **PotatoFarmers** » Thu Jan 28, 2021 8:27 am

Previous RP [Chapter 3 Part 8]

RP Series: Getting to the top
Chapter 3: New Year, New Goals
Part 9: Let the elf speak for himself

Sporting Daily
Exclusive Interview with The Elf
Our Red Panjias will host the Krytenian Dragons tomorrow, aiming to secure all 3 points that would be worth as much as 6 points. A win at home, in the Libira National Stadium, will allow the Red Panjias to secure top 2 spots with just a point from their final 2 games. Previously, Adnan Suliaha had said that 3 points would be extremely important for the Red Panjias, and anything else would mean that Poafmersia's path to the playoffs (or the World Cup, for that matter) would be extremely difficult and full of potholes, and Poafmersia would want to collect 6 points out of 6 in the next 4 days ahead of the final showdown against top seeds Farfadillis on Matchday 18.

As part of our extensive reporting, we have the rare opportunity to speak to a former Krytenian manager. In our opinion, someone who has been in charge of the Krytenia national team before would have ability to talk about their former employers. The opportunity couldn't come at a more right time, and he provided some of his insights into the upcoming clash between our Panjias (horses, for the people unfamiliar with Poafmer), and their Dragons. This person is none other tthan the Elf, the Poafmersian Premier League record signing, the player that has been instrumental in Kistina Galaxy's rise to their current position, the Valrauncion!

Reporter: "Good day to you, Valrauncion. Pleased to be given this opportunity to speak to you as we review the upcoming match between Poafmersia and Krytenia. We thank you for agreeing to speak to us on this topic, which I am sure, is in every football fan's mind ahead of the big clash tomorrow."

Valrauncion: "Thank you for allowing me to have this interview. Honestly, I am very thankful to Kistina Galaxy, manager Thomas Cadilia, for allowing me to come here to play. Many clubs have bidded for me when I chose to leave Audioslavia, and Thomas and the club came down personally to look for me, offered me their terms of contract, and I willingly accepted. The club also ask me for opinions with regards to player development and club management, especially utilising my experience in managing and playing for many many years."

"How do you find the football situation here?"

"It is really fast-paced and competitive. The shock that I first had is that the players here have a really strong work attitude, something I never saw during my time as Krytenian manager. The players are willing to put in 110% effort to ensure that their team gets the best result, and they never give up in the face of adversities. I was watching the match where the team was brutally hammered by Farfadillis. Honestly, I felt that the players had put in lots of effort. They were unlucky to find a Farfadillis side, and playing them in their home stadium would definitely make the match atmosphere real toxic. The good thing is that most of the players have spent their effort despite falling behind, and work towards a common result - which is to score and be able to eventually get a good result. Against Gyasto-Kai, after going down by 2 goals in 25 minutes, the players fought really hard to ensure that they could put 4 past Gyasto-Kai, with my protégé Iulianus Innocenti, scoring 2 and giving 1 assist.

"Speaking of Iulianus, he has been on top notch form since the second half begun, now scoring in 6 consecutive games. Adnan has placed him alongside Shakira Handris against Socialist New Britain, with the side employing a 4-4-2 diamond for the first time in 4 years. How do you think he will fare?"

"I think he has improved a lot. In the club level Bytia (Hisel) and me have been training him. He is used to playing in 4-1-2-1-2, the diamond 4-men midfield as you referred to. I think Adnan has a tough decision to make against Krytenia. But I would personally stick with him and believe that with the training in the club level, he will continue to strive given the amount of playing time he has been getting."

"What do you think will be the result of the match?"

"I think that Iulianus will be the edge over Krytenia. Really. From my personal experience, I think their players don't have the attitude like the Poafmers. Poafmersia should be able to grab all 3 points, with Iulianus putting in another good performance once again. I think Iulianus has learnt a lot from playing alongside me in the club, and him finding his form at this crucial stage is essential."

"So you say that his selection for the World Cup Qualifiers is due to you?"

"Clearly no," the elf pauses for a while. "While I developed him to become such a good player, I don't have the decision over whether he gets chosen."

"Thank you for your time here, you have certainly given us some confidence ahead of our match against Krytenia."

"My pleasure for being able to get such an interview."

Adnan Suliaha was laughing at the interview conversation between the elf and Sporting Daily. "True to the rumours. He tries to tone down but still remains that arrogant elf that everyone knows." He turns to Katiri Hedge, who also found the interview amusing. "Do you think we should follow the elf's advice?"

Katiri looked at Adnan. "4-men diamond midfield? I still think switching to a 3-4-3 would be better in that case. Throw in Shakira alongside Pete and Iulianus. Maybe Joel instead of Pete. Or even Hansel. Honestly, I haven't had the slightest clue, but I am pretty sure 4-4-2 would be too weak to counter Krytenia."

"Maybe. But who knows what will happen with that glorious elf predicting us to win if Iulianus starts the game against Krytenia. Hopefully he is right." Adnan then picks up the newspaper and continues reading. "It is too early in the morning, I need a while to convince myself on the decision of the starting lineup."

Katiri Hedge stood up and walked to the washroom. Just as he walked for a few steps, he turned back and shouted to Adnan, "Just think about it. Iulianus suddenly finding his goal-scoring form is due to the elf. Maybe he should replace us as managers and our team would suddenly start winning with 7-6 scorelines." Both of them laughed even harder.

Poafmersia 4
Iulianus Innocenti 40' (assist by Mason), 89'
Shakira Handris 54' (assist by Innocenti)
Makana Tuft 70'

Gyasto-Kai 2
SOMCHAI Kikwan 6'
Dag’da SKIRATA 25'

Lineup for Poafmersia (3-4-3): Sandi Jaliaha; Nasri Sanchez, Mitchel Rosales, Alex Hoboson; Dargis Walshor, Donk Mason, Daas Taisg, Monesty Erdos; Shakira Handris (c), Iulianus Innocenti, Makana Tuft
Substitutes: Nero Wood (Taisg 67'), Whitney Rios (Erdos 78'), Emma Conner (Walshor 86')

Socialist New Britain 1
UNKNOWN 55'

Poafmersia 2
Shakira Handris 27'
Iulianus Innocenti 70' (assist by Moonar)

Lineup for Poafmersia (4-4-2 diamond): Suzanne Trengove; Mitchel Rosales, Simone Gori, Hollis Stephenson, Natalia Abbott; Woden Sweet; Emma Conner, Josef Gentry; Gisiik Moonar; Shakira Handris (c), Iulianus Innocenti
Subsitutes: Monesty Erdos (Gentry 57'); Zak Kaloyanov (Abbott 77')

works? · by **Abanhfleft** » Thu Jan 28, 2021 8:37 am

From the diary of Britt Hanokssen

I did it. I finally did it. I finally admitted my feelings for Erin. It should have been obvious to me this whole time, but because of where I live I've been doing my best to deny it until I can't deny it anymore. I think it was actually obvious to everyone else on the team except for me. I always thought even Erin could see what I actually felt for her, but it turns out she's just oblivious to it. Or maybe she was denying it herself. It was always easy to deny your feelings when you're living in Upper Valeria. This is the kind of thing that they just don't tolerate over here.

I'm rambling now. I gotta stop it. Stop it somehow. Stop it. Stop being so clingy, Britt. But is it being clingy when you're willing to do anything just to make sure your best friend is safe? I said what I said. I will do anything to protect Erin, make sure she's safe. It's just a fucking shame that she won't do the same thing for me. Sometimes it just sucks to be Brittany Hanokssen.

Shae suggested that maybe I could go to Baratstan if I was really that interested in being with Erin. She's good enough to play for Athletic Sungri, but sure as hell I'm not, not unless a miracle happens and I get some muscle and some skill. It's a long shot, but it's still a shot. It's definitely something worth thinking about, at the very least.

At least I'm not the only one feeling betrayed. Shae just found out that Lily's decided to go to Ross United after all. Now I'm the one having to comfort her after she comforted me after I confessed my feelings to Erin. Life feels like a wheel sometimes, you know? Sometimes you're down, and then suddenly you're up, and just as suddenly you're back down again. Life can be so tough.

(A pencil sketch of Britt's friend Shae Victoria is drawn to the right of the previous entry.)

Indah and I just had a talk about our futures. She's worried about what she's going to do after she retires, and I'm here worried about what else I could do with my life besides football. On the surface it looks like we're in the same boat, but our situations couldn't be more different from each other. There's a lot of other things out there that Indah can do once she hangs up her boots like become a manager in the office or a factory. Me, the only thing I ever wanna do is football, but sadly I can't even play football without looking like an absolute fool. I'm actually surprised I managed to hang on to my place in the squad, let alone be part of a team that's actually challenging for the title.

Nothing much is gonna change when I'm gone though, but I can't say the same about Lily. She announced it to the rest of the team after the training session for Scotsvik: she's going to Ross United next season. Erin said it best: this is going to be our last chance to win the First Tier because next season, we are not going to be anywhere near this good once Lily's gone. Little comfort that is for Shae though. We're a really messed up team, Hunsen Loggers are.

- Entries dated 30 January and 5 February 2020

(OOC: I'm not going to put any scores down because I missed so much. All of my groupmates can RP their matches with me however they like, within my RP permissions of course.)

by **Savojarna** » Thu Jan 28, 2021 9:42 am

SavojarSports.sj - inside reports from all Savojarna
Northlights struggle ahead of superweek

By Jaukka Halanen

The Savojar National Team is about to head into a veritable superweek after their shocking home loss to Netop, the first loss at the Bjurman in almost two years since their 0-1 to Murphtannia in the final game of WCQ86. Still five points ahead of the first pursuitors, the trio of Saint-Domingue, Netop and Zwangzug, the Savojars have a chance to secure qualification to the World Cup ahead of time again. Two losses, however, could have drastic consequences as the Northlights will receive Abanhfleft before travelling to Chartistan. Losing the first game would mean the third loss of the campaign, after the first one had also been to Abanhfleft; a second loss could drop the Savojar squad all the way out of playoffs depending on how the other games go.

Ahead of this superweek, Savojarna are in mild disarray. The loss to Netop and draw in Saint-Domingue means Savojarna have now played four games without a win; a fifth would be the longest winless streak for the Northlights since the disastrous start to the qualifying for the 84th World Cup, which saw Olaf Jurtanen sacked as national team coach. However, it should be noted that not all is bad. There were difficult games among this streak that the Savojars solved well, such as the draw against top seed Zwangzug; in others, luck has played a role as they have hit the post late in the game against Saint-Domingue and were giving up an unfortunate goal against Netop.

Nevertheless, Mikaela Rangren refused to let that be an excuse. “Luck is a part of the game, and we have benefitted from it in the past as well. There are games we need to win even if we have bad luck, and I think that games against teams more than hundred places below us are among the games we have to win. Netop and Saint-Domingue played well and punished us for our mistakes, and now we have to look forward. We have to play like this is already the World Cup, even if it’s a game where we are clear favourites. The time to experiment is over when you have a match ball on your feet”, she said in no unclear words. The call-ups for the game mirror this sentiment, as the 20-man-squad looks like something that could easily be a World Cup callup.

Meanwhile, the SFFB is also blaming some other factors. The old bogeyman of fixture congestion has been briefly raising its head again, although it reeks of a lazy excuse when there are teams like pre-Zenith Nephara finding big success, and the SFS A has been reduced to 18 teams not the least to help with this issue. “Partisan have been playing in three international competitions, that is getting on you”, SFFB Press Speaker Södergren said, but Rangren has quickly defused this in her press conference. “It may affect a few players, as do many other factors. There are other issues at hand. We just need to focus and remember to be hungry, that can be hard across eighteen games, especially when you’re doing well. I think what happened is that some players let their guard down for a moment and then we got hit”.

The opponents should be a good omen. Despite their loss in the last clash away, the Northlights have good memories of facing Abanhfleft, especially late in the campaign. Although their first clash, an octofinal in the Cup of Harmony, went 4-3 to the Fleftic, Savojarna remained unbeaten against them in the WCQ campaigns 80 and 82, locking in playoffs for WC 80 with a 5-2 away victory. At home, Savojarna’s record against Abanhfleft is untarnished, showing a 3-1 in WCQ 80 and a 4-3 to open WCQ 82. In general, Savojarna are doing well at home, remaining unbeaten at the Bjurman for the ongoing campaign and netting a total of 17 points in 7 home matches (5 wins, 2 draws). Even more impressive is another fact: Since the 0-1 against Murphtannia at the end of WCQ 86, or to put it differently in 22 months, no team has managed to score a goal against Savojarna in the Bjurman.

We’re hoping the series will hold up tomorrow against Abanhfleft. Kick-off is, as is common, at 20:30; the game will be shown live on STV2. If you are on the road by then, you can of course catch the SavojarSports.sj live blog on this page!

Rosters for the upcoming matchdays:

vs Abanhfleft: Pakanen - Pedersen, Zirkova, Forsberg, Skov - Ilkkanen, Maersk - Voynov, Lundell, Jashkin - Jacobsen
Bench: Virulainen, Viipuri, Dmitriev, Klaebo, V. Loeseth, Poulsen, Rajala, Midtjaer, Nweke
vs Chartistan: Pakanen - Viipuri, Zirkova, Forsberg, Skov - Ilkkanen, Maersk - Rajala, Lundell, Jashkin - Nweke
Bench: Virulainen, Pedersen, Dmitriev, Klaebo, V. Loeseth, Poulsen, Voynov, Midtjaer, Jacobsen

by **Sannyamathland** » Thu Jan 28, 2021 9:44 am

The Soviet Times-Special Editorial

The Outsider-Ansu Mbiki

Mbiki in action

After a decent World Cup qualification campaign,the international break is over,and its time for the Soviet Premier League to start again.We would like to label the campaign 'decent',because it certainly wasn't good.Nope,not at all.But it is not as bad as many people expected,as the team won 3 matches,which,honestly speaking,was not expected.But a few players truly stood out in this campaign,and Ansu Mbiki is one of them.Getting 2 goals and 4 assists,he has been instrumental in the midfield,with many people believing that the 23 year old has all that takes,to become the best central midfielder in the world.However,its sad to think that this very guy was once denied an entry into the Reading National Academy,just because he was 'different'.
Racism in the Soviet Union has decreased significantly over the last 5 years.While the evil practise is thriving in some parts of the world,especially USA(supported by the racist police),it seems to have undergone a negative growth in this country.But it is not completely non-existent,as proven by Mbiki's story.Ansu Mbiki was born in Banija.He,along with his family emigrated to the Soviet Union at the age of 7.Mbiki's love for football,forced his father to admit him to the academy team of Oldcastle United.He soon caught the eye of the coach and was promoted to their U-15 squad.However,Mbiki left the team oneday,over an argument with the head coach.He was the top scorer in the Juniours Gold Cup tournament,but he was not included in the first team squad for the finals.The coach was of the opinion that Mbiki was injured,but Mbiki claims that this was done so as to give the coach's son some gametime.He left to join the famous Reading National Academy.But to his utter dismay,he was not given a place,inspite of excelling at the trial,just because he was born in Banija,inspite of being a Soviet citizen.Later the director of the academy said to us in an interview:"Well,I thought,why should I give a chance to a non-Soviet boy,when there are thousands of other,purely Soviet boys were their,fighting to get a chance.I was young and naive then,and I am now repentant of my actions."
Mbiki also said that he was not even made the captain of his school's side,inspite of being their record goalscorer,and even scoring a hat-trick in 2 matches,purely because he was not a Soviet by brith.He was an 'outsider' throught his junior years.But that,didn't detered him from playing for the Soviet Union."All these 'outsider' tags,made me determined to play for the Lions.I was sure that I had everything to play for this country."
And look where he is today.The outsider became a beloved.Never judge a book by its cover !

by **Valanora** » Thu Jan 28, 2021 10:26 am

What is football like for those out in Sabine and Caddonia? It has been over two decades now since the newest addition to the Empire was formally brought into the Empire and had its own string of football clubs prop up across the two regions, mostly turning what had been recreational clubs into formal clubs that were then introduced into the Vanorian league pyramid. As a cost saving measure, teams from Sabine and Caddonia were grouped with one another as best as possible in the non-league conferences, to keep the clubs from accruing outrageous travel costs, moving back and forth between the subcontinent and the mainland. It has proven to be a mainly successful venture, as over the course of that time the clubs from Sabine and Caddonia have risen up the pyramid, with four of the clubs from the island going to be part of the league next season, with Club Atlético Bexar having the most success of the bunch having placed fifth in League Two last season, being a real contender for the race for promotion till the end of the season. It is a sign of pride and success that some of these clubs have climbed so high in such a short amount of time and without the sort of backing that most of their mainland counterparts have.

This has brought up the question though, what would a league system that was purely of Sabine and Caddonia clubs have looked like, could it be competitive and be sustainable without the subsidies that the clubs get from the VSC until they were truly established as entities? Well with forty-eight clubs currently operating in the island nations, it would make the most sense to follow the same methodology of the Vanorian system, with three tiers of sixteen teams each, with two clubs relegated from the top and second tier to be replaced by two automatic promotions from the second and third tier respectively. The cup would be staggered, with the bottom two tiers entering at the first round, the top tier would then enter in at the second round, with five rounds in total to decide who would be the cup champion. With a maximum of thirty-five games a season for a team that could end up playing in the Cup Final, disciplinary action would likely be a game's suspension for every third yellow card accumulated, while a red card would have an automatic one game ban with additional games added per straight red card issued.

While we will never know if this could have ever truly taken place, with sponsorships, television contracts, and all of that sort of infrastructure that would have needed to go into place to get such a league setup without direct Vanorian assistance, a few crazy folks having dabbled with the RLStates program "Football Manager" to best create a simulation where this could have played out. Coming in as an "emergent nation" in this simulation, the side would not have any ranking points for their ICC competitions, nor a national team history of note to try and build off of. The simulation is apparently very difficult for players to attempt to get settled in, but appears to have solid following with thousands of downloads coming from all across Sabine and Caddonia as gamers and football junkies try their hand at this neat little simulation. In the real world however, those of us in Sabine and Caddonia have to content ourselves with our clubs making their way up the pyramid and actually getting close to the Premiership at long last, while players like Jaimes Ybarra and Pánfilo Veliz do their best to represent us while they represent the Empire in the Marauders kit.

Simulation table at the start of a new "save".

OOC: Yeah, I made a FM21 DB for Sabine and Caddonia, using a mixture of the Vanorian NT and Premiership rosters to fill out the top tier rosters, with a bit of name conversion and downgrading of talent, for it to be more real and a challenge. Anyone who wants access to this DB may TG me on site or DM me directly on discord, I only ask that you let me know how you get on and with what club(s) or NT!

by **San Ortelio** » Thu Jan 28, 2021 10:44 am

The atmosphere was great. Scratch that. The atmosphere was exploding with delight. For over eighty minutes, the Swordfishes had struggled and toiled against Sannyamathland. With San Ortelio still in the mix for the play-offs and performing at home, the Lions simply decided to fall back and defend the draw - knowing that that was exactly the result Di Tane and his boys wanted to avoid. After forty-five minutes, it had become clear that this stalemate was not going to end itself and I Spada came out of the dressing room with all guns blazing and an experimental 3-5-2 line-up. Still, it wasn’t but in the business end that Orazio Canova deflected a cross from youngster Lorenzo Moreschini, giving the ball just enough speed to make its way between Santos Jr and the post. A close call in multiple respects, but just enough to keep the dream alive.

It is no surprise that it’s Redoccio’s very own Fabrizio Confalonieri who suddenly kicks off a well-known fan song in the already exalted dressing room. He brings the first lines with the required amount of drama, swooning to the final words and prancing around the young striker.

”When the tactics are stuck and our team’s out of luck… Where’s Canova...
When the coaches despair and we play without flair… Where’s Canova…”

By now it’s not just Curiale or Evacuo that chip in - all have visited the stadium of Virtus enough times in recent history to know the lyrics attributed to the upcoming talent.

”When we crave for a goal but it’s out of control… Where’s Canova...”

All are on the benches, with the most tonedeaf ones banging the roofing on the rhythm - or rather those with the awareness of their lack of musical talent judged by the most unprofessional chorus coming through the hallways of Il Olimpico.

”When the ball must go in.. THEN EVERYONE SING! HERE’S CANOVA!”

The young striker blushes over the honour of his squad, but salutes the main singer by offering him a match ball which he had nicked somewhere in the chaos of the last whistle, a gesture obviously greeted by more hurrahs and unintelligible cries. It’s a genuine post-match happiness, the kind which only erupts naturally after a tough task executed well.

“Call your mother, guys, we’re on the news!” Salvatore Moscati grins, having somehow managed to put the rickety thing in the corner on TeveUno. We know it’s a television screen used for tactical analysis but most mainly use it to dry their socks after a rainy game. Nonetheless, the news is on and the presenter is all smiles.

“Buonasera and welcome to TeveUno Update - all news from San Ortelio and beyond. My name is Barbara Giunti and with me is Gianni Alberti, for the sport. And we go straight to you Gianni as our Swordfishes exceeded all expectations - once more.”

The boisterous shouting from before gains in force.

”Thank you Barbara and indeed - the Swordfishes lined up for a home game in the road to the World Cup 87. The confrontation against Sannyamathland, the number eight in the group might not be the toughest on paper but after the loss in Turori last week…”

“Like we were gonna win that,” Di Masi sneers.

”... the pressure was on to keep the advantage in the race for the second spot, which gives entry right to the play-offs. The game opened nervously, with a lot of midfield play and some technical mistakes, as can be seen in this missed control by Confalonieri and the subsequent…”

“You lose one ball! One ball in a whole game and you make the news, mamma mia,” Fabrizio laments, much to the amusement of his teammates.

”... Sannyamathland produced fairly little chances but this strike from Elvis needed to be tipped away by Lanzafame, who played another impeccable game.”

“You save one ball! One ball in a whole game and you make the news,” Confalonieri repeats himself, turning the grins into laughter once more.

”... good opportunity by Carmine Garofalo on a corner from Del Prete was headed just wide with twenty minutes on the clock and the pressure…

“He pushed me,” Carmine defends himself, “you see it clearly in the replay! His hand on my shoulder and…”
“It must be a guy who doesn’t know you always play by the book,” third goalie Pino laughs, pointing to Garofalo’s dodgy reputation in the box. The striker tries to grin at the fun poked, but a game without a goal remains a touchy subject.

”... but with time running out, substitute Lorenzo Moreschini darted along the right wing…”

“Good job, kiddo,” Moscati gives a well-meant pat on the shoulder of the promising right-back. He might have been a key member in the Di Bradini Cup triumph, in this dressing room he’s still one of the understudies and this marked his first big impact.

”... finding Orazio Canova near the penalty point.”

“Boom! I still like seeing it as much as in the live version,” Giacomo Favaro grins, “you seem to be learning a thing or two in Brenecia.”
“It’s good,” Canova agrees.
“A thing or two? The kid has gotten twice as muscled,” Confalonieri adds, having been on the frontrow to witness Canova’s development in Virtus.

”... And with this result, the team can look forth to the difficult double-header against Freeport and Qasden.”
“Thank you Gianni, that’s all for now for football. We still have a remarkable update from the Winter Olympics in store for you but that’s for the tailend of this bulletin.”

“Either you hit the gym or the gym hits you,” Canova says whilst flexing his muscles in a dramatic pose, “It’s like you’re playing Robur every week there…”
“Free fight battles masked as a football game,” Lucarelli mutters, emphasising the reputation Robur has for physical football.

”Our main story today is the discovery of two bodies at the foot of the Zaccero cliffs earlier this afternoon…”

“Well, not exactly,” Orazio Canova continues, “it’s as if you’re playing a Robur that actually knows how to produce passes and well, you know, play the game.”

All eyes turn to Romeo Gozzi, the quirky striker who is the sole Robur player in the dressing room. Notorious for his stunts on and off the field, he’s an outlier in the group but so far this hasn’t led to any major eruptions: Di Tane ensures he sees the grass every once and a while and Gozzi keeps his obnoxiousness to acceptable levels.

“What are you guys looking at,” Romeo shrugs, “all I hear is that Robur’s the only squad in the league that could stand their ground in the A-League.”

”It is unclear whether the two were shot to death on the location or whether the bodies have been displaced. The crash down the cliffs made identification difficult, but based upon…”

More laughter and amusement.

“And despite all that training, I’m still a stronger muscle than our walking pencil,” Gozzi can’t resist adding a sharp edge to his comment.

Within seconds, the two strikers get positioned at a different side of the physio table for some arm wrestling. The team obviously delights: a victory and a small brawl, what more can you wish for in one evening?

”... personal belongings, one victim has been identified as Stefano L., a man known amongst the police for his criminal track record…”

Everyone is so taken by the ad hoc wrestling match that only Gianmarco Del Prete notices Enrico Lanzafame. He still sits in the corner, glued to the television report of which the sound nearly drowns in the tornado of sound coming from the physio table.

”... remarkably, the victim seems to have been shot with bullets from a police gun which was found on the second, yet unidentified man. Sources from the SONP confirm that this is a decommissioned weapon, making it more difficult to assess how the gun ended up…”

Whilst intrigued with the duel between the two reserve strikers, Del Prete scoots over to his goalkeeper. Lanzafame is known for being quiet, a bit reserved within the group but still - he had been knocking his shoes together at the pace of the song as well as any other.

“A familiar face, Enrico?” he asks, not sure which register to hit.
“I’m… I’m actually not sure,” Enrico replies before standing up and leaving the room, unnoticed by a squad too focussed on Gozzi getting the better of his junior colleague.

SIX MINUTES EARLIER

“Won’t you come to bed now? I mean, you’ve already seen the game this time?”

Frustrated, Francesco Calcaterra rubs his eyes, trying to get his nerves together before replying. How he wished to have been at the office at this moment, working on the case together with Valeria as if nothing had happened, with the soothing voice from Paolo Del Strada in the background. Instead he had tried to watch the game at home and… People often said he was a family man, a good father for his two kids and a loving husband. Francesco took pride in that but…

“They’re just going to show the same - the score didn’t alter anymore.”
“I know honey, but…”

But you have been talking the whole first half about some stupid fight with that woman from work you hate anyway, so I don’t really care at all. Then the oldest one spilled her drink all over the table and I spent twenty minutes cleaning up the mess and then the little one had thrown up in his crib so when I got down again, it suddenly was one-nil and I had missed it all.

“... but I just want to see the other highlights from the news. And some Winter Olympics, maybe.”
“You’ld almost think there’s a different place you would rather be,” his wife says curtly before stomping up the stairs to the bedroom.

Francesco would have made a last remark if it weren’t that close to the truth. Not for any romantic reasons as his wife seems to suspect - but still. Working overtime with that young attractive colleague is not exactly what will settle her worries. He should explain but… Some days you just miss the energy for that and he doesn’t get further than a short “goodnight, honey”.

Beer in hand and finally getting to enjoy the quietness, Francesco watches the score from Canova from three different angles and, satisfied, he starts to consider. Maybe if he shuts it down now and goes upstairs, she’ll be cooled down and they can talk it through for a second. Maybe even so-

His thoughts come in a standstill.

”It is unclear whether the two were shot to death on the location or whether the bodies have been displaced. The crash down the cliffs made identification difficult, but based upon…”

The body of the first victim is shown, with a designer shirt ripped open. On the chest a large tattoo appears. The gothic letters are difficult to read, a few covered in blood. But the true experts of Tikariotian metal will have no trouble recognizing the large angel figure.

Depraved Angel.

Valeria. Shit. She’s in trouble, Francesco realises at once.

”... remarkably, the victim seems to have been shot with bullets from a police gun which was found on the second, yet unidentified man.”

Francesco now stands up and walks towards his tv set. He recognises the other one, with his chest the size of a cupboard and those big, muscled arms. But… Where from?

”Sources from the SONP confirm that this is a decommissioned weapon, making it more difficult to assess how the gun ended up…”

The report drones on but Francesco doesn’t hear it anymore, he’s too focused, trying to match faces and timings and places and…

Then it hits Francesco Calcaterra where he has seen this man before.

”Bye Rocco,” he mutters.

World Cup 87 - RP Thread

Fresto Sports - 28 January 2021

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