Campionato Esportiva 26 - Everything Thread

[Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom]

Zeta Reka & Hügeltaldom Federativna Republika Zeta Reka i Hügeltaldom
Campionato Esportiva Twenty-Six Report Match Three Recap and Match Four Preview

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Group B, and not group C, is where Esportiva sees their first group stage qualifier. The Rekans won a third straight 1-0 contest. This time the opposition was a Xanneria side that held back compared to most pundit's estimates. That may have been a mistake, as Zeta Reka's top eleven players were effectively playing their side's football. It took a mistake from defensive midfielder Shane McCormik to open up the scorecard. With a tricky penalty kick, set piece veteran Rybki scored his first international goal. After that there was a half hour of bus parking, with all eleven men doing something to stop the fourth ranked nation in the region.

The next match for the group leaders is against Vangaziland. There's not too much to detail about Vangaziland, but they are coming off a two goal win against Ethane. A Rekan victory could clinch Group B if Bongo Johnson lose their next match. However if the opposite results occur Zeta Reka would be a point down coming into the anticipated Rekan-Johnson matchup. Vangaziland is joint second in the group for goals scored, though Group B has not been high scoring. The differentials tell their own story as Zeta Reka is at +3 while Vangaziland is balanced. In addition, the Rekans will be the last team in the event to concede a goal, if they botch any saves at all.

Gossip on the island of Pelita Raya tells listeners that David Dix will be returning to play as his knee was deemed healthy. One player who will not be playing is center back Jan Thimig. Thimig left the last game in accordinacne with concussion policies. The head injury came from a tackle initiated by the Rekan player in the second half of play. There's three possible players who can swap over. One interesting choice is right back Bartolomej Waldmiowić. The right back took a more cental approach to his play after Thimig left the game. If Waldmiowić shifted the young Yuri Kewić would start at right back. The public will find out who plays where when the teams enter the Gelora Bong Kanor Stadium.

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Game stats

Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom 1–0 Xanneria
GK: Wukan Radovlawić
LB: Janko Yakowić
CB: Josef Jowanowić: v65
CB: Jan Thimig: v70, 31'
RB: Bartolomej Waldmiowić
DM: Mullow Dorboslawić
LW: Albertow Nowak: v55
RW: Miloš Simeoniwić: 53'
AM: Želmir Kolarowić
AM: Rybki (c): 62'
ST: Stajkwon Hokwok
Subs
RW: Jad: ^55
CB: Wlad Wald: ^65
RB: Yuri Kewić: ^70

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Rank: 1st (=0)
Goals: 3 (3 total)
Possession: 57% (54.6% avg)
Shots: 5 (16 total)
On goal: 2 (6 total)
Saves: 4 (14 total)
Fouls: 11 (37 total)
Corners: 3 (9 total)
Offsides: 0 (2 total)
Yellow Cards: 2 (7 total)
Red Cards: 0 (0 total)

[Jeckland]

SPUDS SINK SOUTHERN ESPORTIVAN UNION

Jeckland were too good for the Southern Esportivan Union at the Campionato Esportiva, cruising to an easy 3-1 victory to move up to third in Group C and boost their qualification hopes. A Martel goal before half time was added to by Gilbert and Sanderson before Borisov netted a late consolation goal.

Both teams came into this tournament unranked but claimed impressive victories in their first games, the SEU against Natanists and Nosts and Jeckland against Copper Cuprum. However, defeats in their second matches left this a vital clash in determining who will qualify from a competitive group. Jeckland made one change to their team, with Blanchard's impressive substitute appearance vs Racing leading to him dislodging Gibbs in the starting XI.

The game began with no real rhythm generated by either side. The battle was largely taking place in midfield, with both sides struggling to progress into the final third. Sanderson had the first real chance, whizzing a shot narrowly over the bar.

Jeckland then started to pass the ball around the midfield more, which caused some problems for the opposition. The three man Jeckish midfield was starting to overrun the SEU duo, and a lovely passing play fed the ball to Dane, only for him to scuff an audacious attempt at a lob similar to Martel's in the previous match. It began to feel more like a matter of time for the Spuds as they consistently attacked, and that's how it proved, a simple pass from Blanchard finding Martel in too much space on the right hand side of the box for an easy finish.

SEU rallied before the break, with Cobb skinning Grey down the right before his cross fizzed agonisingly across the box. Jeckland repsonded in kind, with Stack feeding Dane once again only for the winger to try and square the ball back when the shot seemed on. As the team in yellow headed in at half time they would have felt optimistic about the second half - and they were right to.

A 25 yard effort from Pain just after the break went comically wrong, resulting in a throw in, but the left back soon made up for his mistake, whipping in a beautiful corner than was glanced in with ease by the onrushing Gilbert. The second goal seemed to knock the stuffing out of the SEU, with passes going astray at rates not seen in their impressive first two matches. The third followed just seven minutes later and again came from Pain, this time overlapping Dane in open play before his cross was headed home by an onrushing Sanderson. Sanderson had a chance to make it four on what was a stellar day for the midfielder, only for his shot to be saved well by Wheeler. Jeckland fell asleep defensively at the end to allow Borisov to poke home a consolation goal.

The result lifts the Spuds to third. With Racing all but qualified with three wins, Jeckland's match against Brenecia, the other team on six points in the group, will probably mean qualification for the winner. It will be a daunting task for the Spuds, whose new look team will go toe to toe with some of the biggest heavyweights in the mutliverse in the Patriots.

OOC: Hodson comes in for Grey for the next game.

[Hampton Island]

Setting: CEO and Assistant discuss things in his office

CEO: Hannah does good with that team, I must say.

Assistant: Maybe one day she will actually mature into being a credible soccer manager.

CEO: That last draw was a stinger in that could have been the one we won. Now, we have to play Newmanistan.

Assistant: They also spoke out about the violence. Did the Filindo’s reply to your email?

CEO: Not yet.

Assistant: I wonder if we could stage something with Newmanistan. We have fans there, right? Maybe?

CEO: I’ve seen some in the stands of the games that I have watched, but they are too far and few between.

Assistant: Stage a fight in the stands between our fans, and maybe some Newmanistanians, but in the long run, we say that they were provoked by Filindo fans. We could give our fans an incentive to do so.

CEO: I do like your train of thought, but don’t want to bother with it. You have to keep in mind that any Islander who makes a trip to Filindostan to watch a sport as boring as soccer has to have money. Therefore, they are not going to worry about a small incentive to provoke a fight with the Newmanistanian fans.

Assistant: I suppose, but it would be fun.

CEO: It would be, but let’s not go there. This isn’t the right sport for it. If it were baseball, then I know we would have more of a following on the road, but this game isn’t it. Remember, we’re talking about soccer.

Assistant: More interesting then volleyball. Why do we have a team there again?

CEO: Not my doing. It didn’t go through Stafford City. The people in Marquette are dealing with that. Shellshock Batteries is involved. Note that all of our ladies will have a Shellshock logo on their shirt.

Assistant: I see, I thought you would have had something to do with it.

CEO: Only interesting thing about volleyball is the short shorts the ladies wear, but once you watch a couple minutes, it’s really all you need.

Assistant: I guess. Do you think we can beat the Rockets?

CEO: Absolutely not.

Assistant: I agree.

CEO: It will be a 3-3 draw. That’s my prediction.

Assistnat: You’re on record with that. I say we pull it off, 3-2.

CEO: As long as there is a competent ref from an actual respected soccer country.

[Racing]

>+> A report from Racing <+<

In the last time, Racing got the best result it can achieve in the start of Campionato Esportiva 26. To win over Brenecia is like to win in a confront with an asp while you have not the use of your hand or a weapon. How it is possible? Only luck or talent can be the reason. To wonder does racing have luck or talent?

To find out it is required to follow the racing team in the campionato esportiva group C. It is a group round having five matches and already three of these have completed. Of course racing have the first win over brenecia it was the best way to go. was it just a luck or a talent will depend on the other result racing achieve in group C.

After Brenecia the opponent for racing is jeck land. We consider these the land of jeckk and it is a nation team which has a past in the tournament. For this consideration in campionato esportiva 26 they did not have a history and although they have to start from zero there was expecting that they can do better than similar zero nation such as Kalactanian esposrtiva territroiries. If it was a problem for racing against jeckland it does not show. Racing can win the match and takes four goals to two. It makes racing still in first place. After jeck it is copper cuprum. this was more difficult for racing as the copper team has some acknowledgment in the ranking table. again racing has a victory with two goals. three games are played and three times the game is won by racing. now to answer the question is it a luck or a talent that give to racing victory over brenecia?

so in the matches yet Racing does not lose. there will be two more important games for racing. Natanians and Nosts are ranked in the highest. Southern Esportivan Union are making tricky choices. with two wins racing can finish first place and bring talent to the next stage of the competition. with this the racing team will be fast and will win.

Group C
Brenecia 1–0 Natanians and Nosts
Jeckland 3–1 Southern Esportivan Union
Copper Cuprum 1–2 Racing

  Group C                           Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Racing                              3   3  0  0    9   5  +4    9
2 Brenecia                            3   2  0  1    8   5  +3    6
3 Jeckland                            3   2  0  1    6   5  +1    6
4 Southern Esportivan Union           3   1  0  2    6  10  −4    3
5 Natanians and Nosts                 3   1  0  2    6   5  +1    3
6 Copper Cuprum                       3   0  0  3    2   7  −5    0

[Filindostan]

Filindostan president Dorigo Dutete addresses the public after stadium riots in San Marco.

Transcript

Good morning to the Filindo people and to our visitors for the Campionato Esportiva.

First, I want to apologize publicly to the visiting people, whether part of national teams or not, for the rude behavior or our people. To ensure your safety, we have increased police presence at every area of your interest. Stadiums, pubs, bars, etc. I also promise to provide maximum security to the delegates of the nations competing in the nat-, this tournament. You should expect the changes immediately or after a day, because I have given the order, and those orders must be followed absolutely. We have ensured na mananagot yung mga nanggugulo sa mga stadium kagabi. (TN: We have ensured that those responsible for the stadium chaos will be held accountable.)

The other point that I want to emphasize, and this is for the people or the constituents that I have, is, mga ptangna kayong mga Pilindo kayo sa mga pinaggagawa ninyo. Magpirmi kayo sa mga bahay nyo, mga ptangna kayo. Nakakahiya kayo sa bayan natin. You try to hurt our own national team and foreigners visiting our country? Ayus ayusin ninyo mga buhay nyo, mga ptangna kayo. Subukan nyo uli saktan mga dayo, sinasabi ko, o b o s e n ko kayo sa DDS ko mga ptangna kayo.

(TN: The other point that I want to emphasize, and this is for the people or the constituents that I have, is, you son of a btch Filindos for what you've done. Stay at home, mthrfckrs, you're embarrassing our country. You try to hurt our own national team and foreigners visiting our country? You sort out your lives, mthrfckrs. Try to hurt the visitors again, I'm telling you, I'll e r a d e c a t e you with my DDS, you mthrfckrs.)

That is all for me for today. Good morning, Filindostan.

[Damukuni]

A Statement from the President of the United States of Damukuni, Charles Preston

Good evening, fellow citizens of our nation, our region, and the world.

A couple of nights ago, an unfavorable outcome for the Filindostani national team was handed down in the Campionato Esportiva at the hands of our beloved Football Legends. While we understand this is a tough time for our friends to the south, we understand the hospitality shown to us at the event was less than becoming of a peaceful, prosperous island nation.

Hear this from us: Filindostan, we forgive you. We're not mad. We're above and beyond that. We'll even give you a hug and a kiss if we pass you on the street. I believe the restrictions the DFL Board of Directors placed on Venividicci and your players here are more than enough to satisfy any desire for punishment.

We hope you learn from this, and we hope to see your team again in the future under more favourable circumstances.

Good night.

[Filindostan]

MATCHDAY 4 CUTOFF

Will we see more teams clinch and more teams lose their chance to advance to the Round of 16?

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MATCHDAY 4 RESULTS

Group A
Ummat al-Haqiqa 0–2 Filindostan
The Golden Lotus 1–0 Burgburgh
Fhulghamous Peninsula 2–0 Damukuni

  Group A                           Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 The Golden Lotus                    4   3  1  0    8   1  +7   10   Q
2 Damukuni                            4   2  1  1    7   4  +3    7
3 Burgburgh                           4   2  0  2    3   4  −1    6
4 Filindostan                         4   2  0  2    3   4  −1    6
5 Fhulghamous Peninsula               4   2  0  2    6   6   0    6
6 Ummat al-Haqiqa                     4   0  0  4    1   9  −8    0   E

Group B
Vangaziland 2–3 Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom
Bongo Johnson 0–2 Xanneria
Ethane 2–3 Mattijana

  Group B                           Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom           4   4  0  0    6   2  +4   12   Q
2 Bongo Johnson                       4   2  1  1    5   5   0    7   Q**
3 Mattijana                           4   2  0  2    7   7   0    6
4 Xanneria                            4   2  0  2    8   6  +2    6
5 Vangaziland                         4   1  1  2    7   8  −1    4
6 Ethane                              4   0  0  4    3   8  −5    0   E

Group C
Natanians and Nosts 1–0 Racing
Southern Esportivan Union 1–0 Copper Cuprum
Brenecia 6–3 Jeckland

  Group C                           Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Racing                              4   3  0  1    9   6  +3    9   Q*
2 Brenecia                            4   3  0  1   14   8  +6    9   Q
3 Jeckland                            4   2  0  2    9  11  −2    6
4 Southern Esportivan Union           4   2  0  2    7  10  −3    6
5 Natanians and Nosts                 4   2  0  2    7   5  +2    6
6 Copper Cuprum                       4   0  0  4    2   8  −6    0   E

Group D
Ceyne Isles 3–2 Ancherion
Hinodejin Empire 4–3 Kalactanian Esportiva Territories
Hampton Island 0–0 Newmanistan

  Group D                           Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Hinodejin Empire                    4   3  1  0   13  10  +3   10   Q
2 Ceyne Isles                         4   2  1  1   11   9  +2    7   Q
3 Newmanistan                         4   1  3  0    6   3  +3    6
4 Hampton Island                      4   0  3  1    5   6  −1    3
5 Kalactanian Esportiva Territories   4   1  0  3   11  15  −4    3
6 Ancherion                           4   0  2  2    7  10  −3    2

Legend

Advances to Round of 16 and clinches group
Advances to Round of 16
Eliminated from tournament

*Erratum in MD3 results where Racing should have been marked as qualified as well due to the succeeding matchups.
**Updated Bongo Johnshon status to advanced to Ro16 as they cannot be lower to BOTH Mattijana and Vangaziland.

[Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom]

Zeta Reka & Hügeltaldom Federativna Republika Zeta Reka i Hügeltaldom
Campionato Esportiva Twenty-Six Report Match Four Recap and Match Five Preview

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The first half was action packed as the Rekan side gave up a goal in under fifteen minutes from a long shot. The team lacked co ordination in the block, and this lead to some scary situations for Radovlawić. A few minutes later a cross from Albertow Nowak to Hokwok sealed the deal on an equalizer. Zeta Reka made six shots in the first half, with three on target. With the extra aggression Zeta Reka got a rare first half goal.

Early in the second half, the Vangaziland attack shocked the group leaders again with a right side attack. That was one of many straws that broke Yuri Kewić's symbolic back in a disappointing start. The next series of attacks proved to be less powerful as it seems the Rekans ran out of steam. Coach Perlog made a decision to sub out Rybki and Simeoniwić. With new wind in their sails, Hokwok made a long dribble off a pass from Želmir Kolarowić, and then with only minutes left in the half Kolarowić felt the need to roam and ended up stealing a goal. For the first time in international play Hokwok was the man of the match.

With the win Group B has a guaranteed winner. Wanting to rest some players, Perlog will most likely assigned the following roster for the match against Bongo Johnson.

GK: Wukan Radovlawić
LB: Hans Rudda
CB: Stanko Yakowić
CB: Wlad Wald
RB: Bartolomej Waldmiowić
DM: Stani Gröss
LW: Stojan Heiden
RW: Jad
AM: Želmir Kolarowić
AM: David Dix
ST: Vladi Di

A mix of faces old and new will be trying to keep the Rekan squad undefeated. Since Bongo Johnson are in second place in Group B this will be a good test for the backups before the side heads into larger international events. "We really do want to get all fifteen points" David Dix told interviewers at Zeta Reka's base camp. "We are going to out there and see what happens. Bongo is a stellar team and we hope it's a challenge."

With the group stage locked up, pundits are curious as to who the opposition will be in the round of sixteen. Stats say that Jeckland and Natanians and Nosts could be the opposition. If one wins however then neither result is likely. Another potential opponent is the Southern Esportivan Union. The S.E.U is set to race group leaders Racing. While it is possible for either Racing or Brenecia to finish fourth in the group neither match up is likely or desirable. After that bracketologists say that the runner up of group A, any one of five nations, and the third ranked team in Group D, which could be Newmanistan, Hampton Island or the Kalactanian Esportia Territories, would be quarter final opposition. Of course this is thinking two matches ahead. If the team is brash as local reporters the consequences could be disastrous.

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Vangaziland 2–3 Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom
GK: Wukan Radovlawić
LB: Janko Yakowić
CB: Stanko Yakowić: 13'
CB: Bartolomej Waldmiowić
RB: Yuri Kewić: v62
DM: Mullow Dorboslawić: 30'
LW: Albertow Nowak
RW: Miloš Simeoniwić: v78
AM: Rybki (c): v71
AM: David Dix: 47'
ST: Stajkwon Hokwok: 17', 80'
Subs
CB: Josef Jowanowić: ^62
AM: Želmir Kolarowić: ^71 88'
RW: Jad: ^78

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Rank: 1st (=0)
Goals: 3 (6 total)
Possession: 55% (54.75% avg)
Shots: 9 (25 total)
On goal: 5 (11 total)
Saves: 4 (18 total)
Fouls: 14 (51 total)
Corners: 5 (14 total)
Offsides: 2 (4 total)
Yellow Cards: 3 (10 total)
Red Cards: 0 (0 total)

[Newmanistan]

OOC: Just want to mention that anything expressed in The Rocket Report should not be considered the nation’s stance on anything. If it’s not Emperor Michael V making the comments, then the opinions and commentary are the writer’s only.

THE ROCKET REPORT

YET ANOTHER DRAW

by Brianne Henry,

Before we get into yet another draw, let me start this piece off by mentioning that Filindo President Dorigo Dutete lashed out at his problematic fanbase in a strongly worded statement against those actions. Before talking about that, a Filindo source brought to my attention that Filindo fans have a habit being a “double edged sword.” While passionate, they went on to say that, “they usually bring their megaphones and flares with them - they somehow make it past the guards. Some fans are crazy enough to invade the pitch and cause match delays.” So it is true, then, that this is expected behavior to a point. The statement did mention that security would be increase throughout all venues in the tournament, something that may be a matchday late to hear, but at least now we are finally hearing it. This presence will be seen throughout the cities, and not just at the stadiums, so we can feel a little better about that aspect of it. It’s late, but at least it is there. The President also condemned the actions of the fans. Take comfort in that. I am sure the President would have preferred the Filindostan Football Federation take care of this, but he did well to assert his authority. Perhaps, we can feel a little better about going out to a bar or a shopping mall right now. At this point, anyone who came here to watch Newmanistanian soccer is going to need the distraction. What happened to that team that played so well in the first game? After the opening matchday rout, there has been little to be excited about.

The game against Hampton Island should have been three points, even if the Golden Bears have been competitive during play so far. Even if it wasn’t going to be three points, you would have thought that the Rockets could at least fire the ball into the net against a team with a highly offensive strategy. Their soccer team is a group of Lexi Pattersons, but no Midnights. They field models, male ones included, especially up front, and blend them in with soccer players. However, Lexi Patterson has become a good NSSCRA driver, so these models are showing at minimum, a basic competency to play soccer. Hampton Island does not do things in a conventional manner, but one thing you have to give them credit for is that they show up and play the games as well as they can. In baseball, that’s allowed them to crack the top 10 in overall rankings. In stock car racing, their drivers don’t contend for wins, but they don’t often embarrass themselves. They have as many NSSCRA wins in the modern era as we do: one. In soccer, they weren’t terrible in World Cup qualifying, and went on to a better then expected Cup of Harmony. For this game, you saw that they are a team doesn’t quit. They aren’t great, and they could benefit from having a roster of all soccer players and not partially models if they wanted to be better, but I respect what they do.

The strength of their team seems to come in the midfield and the back end, with players like Cameron Allwine and Matt Prosser appearing to shoulder the load to carry the team. In this game anyway, they were the co-stars of the match in my eyes. Newmanistan did not generate much offense in this match with the possession that they had, and that is due to the positioning of the Golden Bears. Sometimes, in a 0-0 draw, there can be a lot of excitement, and you leave the game saying that both goalkeepers were amazing. This was not one of them. The match was a drag if you need excitement, with the overwhelming majority of the game played in the midfield. For Newmanistan, Ryan McNamara did what he had to in goal, but the models in front looked more like models and not soccer players for this game.

Here we are then, with one game to go and the unthinkable possible: Newmanistan not even being in the top four. Before this tournament began, there was no one thinking that players were playing for jobs. Everyone seemed safe. It could still be the case, but if they don’t make that top four in the group, then that may change.

OOC #2: Despite my inclusion of the last paragraph, I believe that we have clinched already due to Hampton Island and KET playing one another in the final MD. We can't get passed by both. Also, we can't be passed by KET regardless because wins is not a referenced tiebreaker in the host bid, and we have H2H on them.

[Fhulghamous Peninsula]

CRESCENT NEWS NETWORK
SPORTS CHANNEL - OFFICIAL WEBSITE
ABANHFLEFT • PRIDNESTROVIA • OONTAZ • COPPER CUPRUM • TRENDSTART • FHULGHAMOUS PENINSULA

CAMPIONATO ESPORTIVA XXVI: FHULGHAMOUSIAN RESTRUCTURING AND FILINDO FAN TROUBLES
By Malik Qazizadah


Fhulghamousian fans out in force in Filindostan for Campionato Esportiva XXVI. (Courtesy of Crescent News Network Sports Channel/Bikendi Garrastazu)

SAN MARCO, FILINDOSTAN - It's not everyday that I make comments about sport in the Fhulghamous Peninsula. Yes, it could be argued that it's part of my job description seeing as I am the chief football analyst for Crescent News Network Sports, and that since the Fhulghamous is part of Abanhfleft's sovereign territory its football falls under my purview. That being said, my good friend Vasilis Rodas is currently chief football analyst for the Fhulghamous, and therefore I am sure that he is much more qualified than I am to discuss matters within the FPFA (Fhulghamous Peninsula Football Association) than I am.

Now, that being said I believe that I am operating well within my rights as a citizen of the Democratic Republic when I state my opinion that I believe that the FPFA has squandered a great opportunity to make the best out of the Campionato Esportiva by taking the route that they have gone down on. Come on, let's admit it, football in the Fhulghamous is not the best we've ever seen, nor will it ever be. The fact that Orestes Katsouranis Jr. managed to scrape a bronze finish for the Peninsula in the 23rd Campionato with a generally aging squad of players is nothing to be scoffed at, of course, but all future attempts on his part to improve upon this have all been met with failure.

So the FPFA took the decision to not extend Katsouranis' contract before the start of Campionato 26. Rumors say that Governor General Petrarchos Kulbano himself wanted Katsouranis out. But no matter who made the decision to boot Katsouranis, we do know for a fact that the man who succeeded him was Antonis Papadimitriou, most recently of Atletico San Sebastian of Unang Liga. Papadimitriou came in and announced grand plans for his "restructuring of Fhulghamousian football", starting with the exclusion of all Fhulghamousian NT players playing abroad (namely, Abanhfleft, the other member nations of the APOC Coalition, and everywhere else in the multiverse) in favor of players plying their trade locally. Out goes the likes of Max Fetfatzidis, Elliot Edison, and Kieran Moskowitz in favor of players like Thanasis Mavrellis, Wessam Shammas, and Eric Alferez. Yes, I have little if any idea about these players or how they even play. Yes, I am admitting that I do not know everything that there is to know about football.

That was Papadimitriou's gamble, for lack of a better word. A squad of 23 players all based in the Fhulghamous Peninsula, none of whom have set foot in Abanhfleft or anyplace else at least in a football playing capacity. And, for the first few matchdays at least, the gamble appears to not have paid off at all for poor Mr. Papadimitriou. First, a 1-0 loss against the hosts themselves, Filindostan. We've always figured that the Pula Garuda were going to be a tough opponent no matter what, so how much more could they be tougher now that they've got home advantage as well? But 1-0 doesn't sound all that bad. Any of the Fhulghamousian players converting the handfuls of chances that they had to score could very well have turned the tables. But after that came perhaps the Fhulghamous' greatest defeat yet in the Campionato, a 4-0 loss against Golden Lotus with O. Fujita and I. Hisakawa both scoring braces. The team from the Fhulghamous played exactly like you would expect a team from the Fhulghamous to play: constantly punting to the strikers and consistently getting overloaded in midfield because the players don't know the difference between triangle passing and tiki-taka.

Results do appear to be picking up though with the Fhulghamousians finally getting victories on the board, first against the unfancied Ummat al-Haqiqa (which sounds more like an Oontaznik teenager who turns into the second coming of Simeone di Bradini/Laborious Hawk/insert favorite great football player from the multiverse here in those football managing games the youth so love to play more than actual football these days) which got an unexpected 4-1 spanking from the masters of lousy football. And then, of course, the absolute big surprise itself, the 2-0 win over Damukuni. Now there Papadimitriou actually deserves some credit for finally taking advantage of what skills this team he has assembled has actually got and then molding his game plan around it instead of the other way around. Now that was a performance that even the masters of defensive football, Gaëtano Bernardeschi and Artemio Peres, would have appreciated.

Now to the other matter which I wished to talk about, and that is the behavior of the players of the Filindostan national team against their counterparts from Damukuni, and the subsequent reactions of the Filindo fans to these events. I'm sure you've heard about the fact that Filindostan were forced to forfeit their match against Damukuni after having five of their players sent off. Now I've watched the match itself and it appears to me that the problem was that the referee simply lost control of the whole thing. I've never seen a worse display of refereeing since Patrice Cuivert mistakenly sent off Jaggi Vasudev instead of Pierre Cuvillier in a heated FPL match between Sporting Ceneisis and Arsenal de Releinthi back in the 2014-15 season. Of course, these days we now have VAR, but I see the tipping point of this incident being the fact that he stood by his initial dismissal of Philippe Batara despite the video assistant clarifying the identity issue between Batara and Daneilo Amomonpon. And when one of the players you're supposed to be trying to calm down grabs your cards and tries to order you off the pitch as well, then that is the signal that the game has well and truly slipped through your fingers.

Of course, it was natural for the Filindo players to feel aggrieved, like everything is conspiring against you. I could very well feel the same in their shoes. But the fans' reactions were simply disproportionate. You are not the ones getting sent off unfairly, fans. Let the respective federations deal with this issue; don't complicate it even more with your entrance. It's not your place. I can't believe I still have to say that in this day and age.

End Article

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They came like thieves in the night. They wore clothes colored black, gray, dark blue, navy blue, basically anything that would allow them to blend in with the darkness. This group of people did not speak a word between themselves, but speaking wasn't necessary since they already knew what they were going to do. The group walked towards a mural depicting the president of Filindostan, Dorigo Dutete, in some sort of heroic pose or whatever. The group put down their bags and took out the contents, which were all cans of spray paint. The group then did their dirty work over the next hour, taking a break only to hide from random passersby. But soon their job was over, and they blended back into the night just as swiftly as they had come. Come the dawn and the damage to the mural could be clearly seen: Dorigo Dutete's face now sported a cartoony spiraling mustache, and he had been given outrageously big buck teeth. His raised clenched fist had been made to look like the middle finger was raised. His name on the mural had also been vandalized, and it now read BOBO BUTETE. Translated from Fleftic it simply means stupid tadpole, but given the FIlindo president's propensity for playing fast and loose with his language, there was no telling how he would react to this.

Beside the Bobo Butete vandalism were the words "COME AFTER US IF YOU DARE!" alongside the letters RFA in red. To everyone else, all this would seem like a random act of vandalism. But to eagle-eyed Fleftics, this could only mean one thing.

The Real Fans of Abanhfleft were back.

[Hampton Island]

Phone Call between Stadium CEO and manager Hannah Sanders

CEO: Hello, Hannah, how are you?

Sanders: I am fine, how are you?

CEO: Good, so we have to talk about something important.

Sanders: You are like totally mad at me aren’t you, I’m sorry.

CEO: I am not mad at you.

Sanders: Like you always call me sweetie or hun or like something nice like that and you didn’t do that this time.

CEO: I’m sorry, my bad. I have a lot of things on my mind right now. I am not mad at you, sweetie.

Sanders: Oh thank you thank you!

CEO: In fact, I am happy you got a draw against Newmanistan, I place a large bet here that the game would end in a draw and I came out on top.

Sanders: Oh cool. Draws are like so annoying, it’s like why can’t we just play until like someone wins. We can totally do one of those shootouts or something.

CEO: I agree with you.

Sanders: You do?

CEO: Yes, I actually do. I hate games ending in draws. If I had my way, we’d do a shootout in every tied game. That makes people want to watch soccer.

Sanders: Yeah like totally.

CEO: So, this next game coming up is the fifth of five, and there are some important people who are going to making the trip.

Sanders: Really?

CEO: I am not sure why, but I have been told we are going to have maybe a couple hundred supporters at the game instead of a couple dozen.

Sanders: Oh wow so I like she really make sure my hair and makeup are like perfect.

CEO: Yes, you do that, because like I said, they are important people.

Sanders: Oh okay. I will totally do that.

CEO: It’s a pretty important much, so I want a different lineup for the game. We need to win.

Sanders: Yeah like I would like to win.

CEO: I would like to make it into the playoffs. So don’t play the models. Play the real soccer people.

Sanders: Like what? They are my bff’s?!?

CEO: I know, but if they want to be mad tell them I made you do it so if they want to yell at someone they can make a big mistake and attempt to yell at me.

Sanders: Yeah, ok.

CEO: So you will use this lineup. Get a pen.

Sanders: Ok, got it.

CEO: Martin in goal. Ortiz, Carney, Sullivan, Washington and Wilson in the back.

Sanders: That’s like five in back.

CEO: Correct, we are using a 5-3-2.

Sanders: Oh, okay. Got it.

CEO: Allwine, Prosser, and Folk in the middle. Tenney and Johnson up front.

Sanders: Okay. Can my bff’s be substitutes?

CEO: Yes, but no using the Carter’s until at least the 70th minute, and only if we are losing and it looks like one of the regulars is tired.

Sanders: Okay.

CEO: You got the write lineup?

Sanders: Yeah, I will do it.

CEO: You sound depressed now.

Sanders: Yeah, I know it’s just that like I totally wish we could like go with the lineup that got us here, you know. Like I feel really good about them doing good in this game. I mean like they have worked so hard too just like the real soccer players have. They know its an important and they were like really trying in practice to like basically do as good as like they really could and now they can’t play and I totally like feel bad for them. They were put in this like really tough situation. You know they were models and like just wanted to look pretty or handsome but like they did what you wanted and like they wanted to player soccer and like got a tie against Newmanistan who are good I think but maybe they aren’t in soccer but anyway I just feel totally bad about telling them they are not going to play.

CEO: I know what it is best.

Sanders: You like told me a story about someone named Hana Bhe before I went here and how like she really sucked in her first year but then in her second year she did so much better maybe she like did not win a race but she still got finish out the season. I like know who that is now and they are bringing her back for like another year because like she is trying so hard and doing so well. They like didn’t give up on her because she didn’t win a race and take her ride away for someone else. They stuck with her and I really wish I could do the same thing and like totally stick with the people that brought us here.

CEO: Wow, Hannah.

Sanders: I’m sorry maybe you are mad at me now but like I am trying so hard and I will do what you say but I won’t like it.

CEO: Hannah, you know what you’re doing right now?

Sanders: What?

CEO: You’re sounding like a manager that has matured into her role. I like that confidence. You do it your way. Play the models, get it done!

Sanders: So you aren’t mad at me?

CEO: No, I guess not. In a way I am impressed by how you are sticking up for them. And you have a point. You’ve convinced me, now go get that win!

Sanders: Thank you, boss.

[Xanneria]

CE Proposial: Condemn Newmanistan
By Steve Stevenson

Coach Rhule on mic at a post-game presser

FILINDOSTAN - Xanneria's survival in the Campianato Esportiva seems to be a more sure bet now after a 2-0 win over Bongo Johnson gave them 6 points and a third place standing in their group with one point and an H2H advantage over Bongo. Best news might be that they have their next opponent in Ethane a team whose focus and $$$ is elsewhere. The game was a rather pleasent one played infront of about 10,000 fans with about 8,000 supporting maroon and gold. the scoring was marginal and happened in a front loaded manor. The scoring got started just 10 minutes in when Eddy Peralta took a Doby Bunkirk pass and shot it at a 100mph towards the goal, the Bongo Golie never stood a chance to even catch that lazer beam of a ball. it was followed up half an hour later by a Bunkirk to Bonchek to Peralta to Laymore curveball that barely bounced in net. with a 2-0 lead at half coach Myrone Rhule to run a more defensive alignment with the second half of the game turning into a big 45 game of keep away. In the end the needed three points were given to Xanneria and they now sit a comfy third place in their group with one game remaining and their opponent struggling. But what was on the minds of most people and not just the Xannerians was the continue fallout of the Filindostan forfeiture in their game versus Damukuni. While it seems of the non-Filindostan teams, Xanneria has had the most traveling fans int he nation, most the games have been fairly calm in terms of fanbases and most reports indicate Xannerians have been treated fine. This may be due to the games being held far away from the epicenter of controversy. This also somewhat brought up controversy in third parties as the Newmanstani press had a field day with this article.

It also seemed to be the only thing on announcers and reporters minds as when coach Rhule steped up to the press stand, wearing his traditional pastel blazer and denim jeans, he was instantly bombarded by press local and international about conditions in Filindostan and about the Newmanistani comments.

Here's an excerpt of what coach Rhule had to say.

I don't know if the incidents have been isolated towards the capital or not, but we've not any rough fan interactions here nor have we had any trouble with locals. Only question we have about Filindostani Football is why did they choose such small stadiums.

When asked his thought on what the Newmanstani papers have been reporting he said the following.

It's Newmanistan, they hate the World Assembly, yet they do there best to be Esportivas "moral compass". It's unsurprising they'd post reports like that in the open.

Coach Rhule did bring up a great point. The Newmanistani reports came out fairly quickly after the initial reports of the games between Damukuni and FIlindo did, yet there hs not been another nation to have clamed their people felt threatened. The more this goes on the more it turns into a bad look for our former CE 25 cohosts.

XANNERIA - 2
Peralta 10'
Laymore 40'

BONGO JOHNSON - 0

[Damukuni]

From the desk of Jiah Leeds

Two in the bag - the best start in the Campionato since the first time there was a Damukunian team in the Campionato. Things were looking up in spite of themselves. A win against sentient cheeseburgers, the first time Damukuni had ever taken on a sentient food species. Then there was the dustup against the Filindostanis. Yeah, that wasn't the best from anyone. We won, but it was really as good as a loss. We got the three points. 6 off 2? That's cricket, all right. Things were going well for us.

Until now.

I'm not sure what happened. I mean, when DFL took over the team, I was expecting some changes, but not this many. The first player-manager experience the country has ever had hasn't been good to me. It consists more of screaming at a bunch of people I've been teammates with for years, trying to keep them in line, and less of actually being out there and scoring goals. I mean, as player-manager, I got one against Filindostan, but that was marred by the events of the night.

Needless to say, jo sou mui ĉistu. I'm very unhappy about all this. This was supposed to be fun. I was supposed to learn how to manage a team. I can't do this. I would rather play than manage.

I should have a few rupesos left from the currency exchange. I don't mind this place; it's not really that bad given the circumstances. I just need out of here. I need off the team. At least for now... Now where was that ferry service?

[Burgburgh]

Burgeoisie Bugle
May You Live In Exciting Times
Percival Thompson

The Bureau of Urban Recreational Games certainly hadn't foreseen this was how the first entry of Burgburgh into national-level international sports would go. Both in terms of success--two wins from four games including overturning the hosts would have been a pipe dream a short time ago--and in terms of the goings on of the locale. Filindostan may not exactly a popular vacation destination for the average Burgeoisie, but one would believe any nation given the trust of the sporting councils of Esportiva would be able to smoothly run a tournament. Hooliganism is something we as a nation have always detested, taking a serene national pastime and adding senseless violence to the mix to entertain the dull cityfolk with nothing better to do. To see such acts breaking out at official Campionato-sanctioned matches? Inexcusable. The Filindostan Football Federation (the FFF, not to be confused with the Farf FFFF) has taken steps in accordance with the backlash, and the increased security at the match between them and our own Ranchers was appreciated.

We only wish it wouldn't have had to come to this in the first place. Especially not as, I've been told by a translator fluent in the native language, the presiding president of Filindostan responded to these borderline-rioters with a dangerously unhinged threat. Highly unbecoming of a head of state, we must say. Perhaps losing to the Golden Lotus was a blessing in disguise--the sooner our players are out of Filindostan, the safer they'll be, I'd wager. I'm sure that's not what our readership wants to hear, though; a surprise performance on our Ranchers' part would do well for establishing the seriousness of the Burgeoisie presence in the Esportivan sports scene, something many of which have called into question or even outright mocked. Even in such adverse conditions, we are here to play.

[Filindostan]

OOC: Per checking the MD4 tables and the MD5 matches, I was not able to note Newmanistan as already advancing to the Ro16. Will note this in the MD5 results.

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FOOTBALL - CAMPIONATO ESPORTIVA SPECIAL
Grading the Campionato Esportiva hosting by the FFF, and the Pula Garuda's performance

SAN MARCO - It has been a sequence of up and downs for the Filindos during the 26th Campionato Esportiva. The four-island nation have successfully bid for the 26th edition of the coveted tournament, and is hosting a major football event for the first time in their history. With the halfway point of the tournament coming up, let's try and grade both the national team's performance and the federation's hosting of the tournament.

FFF - let's add a big fat F in their acronym, good idea, right?

The FSNA staff has been in consensus to give the Filindostan Football Federation a failing grade in the midterms of the grading for this tournament. From the start where administrative errors have been made, and they were unable to control one of their personnel, that the CEO of the news network publicly announced that personnel was an 'ass'. If it was not bad enough, their response, or therefore lack of, on the incident following the Filindo-Damukuni match has been an abject aberration, too dire that the president of the Filindo government have took responsibility and performed actions that the federation should have done.

The incompetence of the Barzagia administration has led to the various criticisms and sanctions being pointed towards the nation, although the stadiums situation where sub-15,000 capacity stadiums were allowed to host knockout stage matches were out of the federation's hands, unless more money is poured for stadium expansions.

What FFF must do to avoid getting the red mark by the end of the tournament is to earn back the trust of the people and the other participating nations, which is a tall order for the current administration to handle.

National Team - D-plus, but could be another F if they fall out of the tournament in the group stage.

The Pula Garuda has not performed up to expectations this Campionato, no less at front of their home crowds. Their performance in the second matchday was an absolute disgrace to their own fans, although the Federation's selection of the referee for the match could also be at fault for this, thus adding another reason to solidify the F grade to them earlier. The suspensions caused the team to lose their luster, forced younger players to step up to the starting lineup, and have their collective strength disintegrate with a 1-0 loss to Burburgh. With Daneilo Amomonpon and Dian Dimara banned for three matches due to their actions that day, Filindostan are in a distress, with the match against group leaders The Golden Lotus proving to be a must-win match. If they lose the match and find themselves out of the running, then this might be the end for Krisna Sudirman's eventful reign as manager.

We'd say that both entities should step up in the latter stages of the tournament to salvage any pride they have left by the time the final whistle comes in the national stadium, GSNP.

Written by FSNA Staff.

[Filindostan]

MATCHDAY 5 CUTOFF

Who will fade in to the round of 16 and fade out from the tournament in this deciding matchday?

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MATCHDAY 5 RESULTS

Group A
Damukuni 3–1 Ummat al-Haqiqa
Burgburgh 2–0 Fhulghamous Peninsula
Filindostan 3–0 The Golden Lotus

  Group A                           Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Damukuni                            5   3  1  1   10   5  +5   10   Q
2 The Golden Lotus                    5   3  1  1    8   4  +4   10   Q
3 Burgburgh                           5   3  0  2    5   4  +1    9   Q
4 Filindostan                         5   3  0  2    6   4  +2    9   Q
5 Fhulghamous Peninsula               5   2  0  3    6   8  −2    6
6 Ummat al-Haqiqa                     5   0  0  5    2  12 −10    0

Tiebreakers: DKI over LOT on goal difference, BGH over FID on H2H result.

Group B
Mattijana 0–0 Vangaziland
Xanneria 3–3 Ethane
Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom 1–1 Bongo Johnson

  Group B                           Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom           5   4  1  0    7   3  +4   13   Q
2 Bongo Johnson                       5   2  2  1    6   6   0    8   Q
3 Mattijana                           5   2  1  2    7   7   0    7   Q
4 Xanneria                            5   2  1  2   11   9  +2    7   Q
5 Vangaziland                         5   1  2  2    7   8  −1    5
6 Ethane                              5   0  1  4    6  11  −5    1

Tiebreakers: MTJ over XAN on H2H result.

Group C
Jeckland 2–1 Natanians and Nosts
Copper Cuprum 0–1 Brenecia
Racing 5–1 Southern Esportivan Union

  Group C                           Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Racing                              5   4  0  1   14   7  +7   12   Q
2 Brenecia                            5   4  0  1   15   8  +7   12   Q
3 Jeckland                            5   3  0  2   11  12  −1    9   Q
4 Southern Esportivan Union           5   2  0  3    8  15  −7    6   Q
5 Natanians and Nosts                 5   2  0  3    8   7  +1    6
6 Copper Cuprum                       5   0  0  5    2   9  −7    0

Tiebreakers: RCI over BRE and SEU over NTN, both on H2H results.

Group D
Newmanistan 6–1 Ceyne Isles
Kalactanian Esportiva Territories 4–3 Hampton Island
Ancherion 2–1 Hinodejin Empire

  Group D                           Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Hinodejin Empire                    5   3  1  1   14  12  +2   10   Q
2 Newmanistan                         5   2  3  0   12   4  +8    9   Q
3 Ceyne Isles                         5   2  1  2   12  15  −3    7   Q
4 Kalactanian Esportiva Territories   5   2  0  3   15  18  −3    6   Q
5 Ancherion                           5   1  2  2    9  11  −2    5
6 Hampton Island                      5   0  3  2    8  10  −2    3

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ROUND OF 16 FIXTURES

R16-1: Damukuni vs Kalactanian Esportiva Territories
at Kompleks Olahraga Yogyakulta, Yogyakulta

R16-2: Bongo Johnson vs Jeckland
at Kabanalan Sports Complex, Kabanalan

Match winners will meet each other at Jakulta Esportiva Stadium, Jakulta.

R16-3: Mattijana vs Brenecia
at San Marco Stadium, San Marco

R16-4: Hinodejin Empire vs Filindostan
at Menodo Municipal Stadium, Menodo

Match winners will meet each other at Stadium Perouno, Bandarito.

R16-5: Xanneria vs Racing
at San Mameng Municipal Stadium, San Mameng

R16-6: Burgburgh vs Newmanistan
at Tanjung Pagi Regional Stadium, Massakar

Match winners will meet each other at New San Rafael Stadium, San Rafael.

R16-7: The Golden Lotus vs Ceyne Isles
at Gelora Bong Kanor Stadium, Bandaroon

R16-8: Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom vs Southern Esportivan Union
at Buenavista Community Complex, Buenavista

Match winners will meet each other at Filindostan National Stadium, San Marco.

[Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom]

Zeta Reka & Hügeltaldom Federativna Republika Zeta Reka i Hügeltaldom
Campionato Esportiva Twenty-Six Report Match Five Recap and Knockout Round Preview

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With a rag tag team the Rekans have gone unbeaten in the group stage. Vladi Di scored early from a series of back and fourth passes with Želmir Kolarowić. Kolarowić ended up being the anchor of today's performance, slotting back with Stani Gröss to head up a 4-2-3-1 formation. The team lied back in waiting until the seventy first minute when Louis Scunt made a great charge past the Rekan block for a goal. The back line was weakened by Stanko Yakowić collecting a red card while fighting for the ball. The Rekans tried to attack in the final moments of the match, almost monopolizing possession in the final five minutes of the match. With a final strike from Valdi Di being off target.

It's a disappointing draw, and the team will have to rejig the roster against the Southern Esportivan Union. It's assumed that the Rekans will lay low and strike with precision against an opponent that is making mistakes according to goal differentials. A good counter attack or two could allow Zeta Reka to play in San Marco. Jan Thimig could return to starting lineup soon as he was recovered from his head trauma suffered in match three. On the flip side, the defense will not be at full strength due to a one match ban from Stanko Yakowić's red card.

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Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom 1–1 Bongo Johnson
GK: Wukan Radovlawić
LB: Hans Rudda
CB: Stanko Yakowić: 56'
CB: Wlad Wald
RB: Bartolomej Waldmiowić
DM: Stani Gröss: 24' v59
DM: Želmir Kolarowić
LW: Albertow Nowak: 57'
RW: Jad
CM: David Dix: v78
ST: Vladi Di: 10'
Subs
RB: Yuri Kewić: ^59
AM: Zoran Kować: ^78

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Rank: 1st (=0)
Goals: 1 (7 total)
Posession: 45% (52.8%)
Shots: 4 (29 total)
On Goal: 2 (13 total)
Saves: 7 (25 total)
Fouls: 16 (67 total)
Corners: 6 (20 total)
Offsides: 2 (6 total)
Yellow Cards: 2 (12 total)
Red Cards: 1 (1 total)

[Newmanistan]

THE ROCKET REPORT

SECOND HALF FLURRY LEADS WAY

by Brianne Henry,

One of the great things about being on the road and covering an international sports competition like this, is you will stumble on various media publications, whether they be professional news agencies, blogs, or just someone’s general ranting about something. The reason I was checking the newswire for what other nations might be saying is because I was interested in seeing how our team was being portrayed given a 1-3-0 record after four games. The Rockets had the one very nice win to open it up, but then had the three draws. Of the draws, one was good, one was acceptable, and then another was ugly. While doing this I stumbled upon a piece from Steve, don’t call me Drake, Stevenson from Xanneria, who was quoting the coach Myrone Rhule. The Xannerian news media has proven itself to be a little untrustworthy, as anyone who follows NSSCRA should know, so I probably should have just looked past the article, but it’s title was something that I just could not ignore. Since Mr. Rhule does not have more important things to worry about like say, coaching a national team, he made some weird statements saying that he has seen nothing wrong that Filindo fans have done in other games, so therefore we are overreacting, essentially. Mr. Rhule, you react as we did so nothing happens. That’s the point of it. Do I need say anything else? He talks about the World Assembly for some reason, which is interesting considering Xanneria is also not a member. In fairness to Mr. Rhule, the Xannerian media didn’t seem to want to talk about soccer.

Mr. Stevenson then went on to say we have a bad look at about something. I agree, we’ve played pretty flat since the opening matchday rout. I assume that’s what he meant, I certainly hope, because that’s why we’re here folks! Newmanistanian fans who made the trip to Filindostan were starting to become flustered, and as the game against Ceyne Isles began, there began to be some booing from these fans as the Rockets were flat again. A Jorge Cortez goal in the 26th minute helped calm those fans for twelve minutes. At that time, the opponents would notch the equalizer, leading to more frustration by our fans. At intermission, the boobirds were back in force, clearly not happy with the team only being in a 1-1 draw. It was not the score as much as the overall sloppiness of play, which was similar to the way that had played against Hampton Island.

Maybe the players needed to hear it. This tournament started so well, but as of late, there has not been much to get excited about. Sometimes the fans can do so much more then a coach can do, but certainly Miguel Hernandez said his piece to the squad. They were locked into the knockouts, but with the way they were playing, it certainly did not seem like they belonged in what is a generous amount of teams advancing, 16 of 24. As the second half began, Newmanistan started to look a little better, but their own fans were still letting them have it as the minutes ticked away without a goal. The turning point of the match might have been when Jarrell Connolly was roughly tackled by Memphis Commons, and no card being issued. Connolly was a little slow to get up, but would remain on the pitch. Three minutes later, Shawn Stoddard returned the favor on Commons, and once again the referee kept the card in his pocket. At least he was being consistent, but the Stoddard tackle seemed to spark the team, and after the hour mark, the chances kept coming. In the 64th, Brent Chapman scored off a corner to make it 2-1 in favor of the Rockets. However, he was not done, as just four minutes later, Chapman found his way through the defense, and Anna St. Preux for the second time to give the Rockets a two goal lead. With the cushion, you could see the confidence coming back, and also that the team known as the Pirates was rattled a bit. We won’t call them senile, but an interception of a lazy Providence Mensah pass instead went right to Connolly, who set up Derek Schaefer to suddenly put the Rockets up by three, in the 73rd minute. Those fans who had been booing were certainly enjoying it now, but the celebrations would continue. Jerome Beyer got into the fun in the 81st minute, on an assist from Tyrone Vannella; and in the 86th, they switched roles with Vannella scoring on an assist from Beyer. This game had become a rout. And hopefully, Newmanistan can carry this momentum into knockouts.

Newmanistan finishes 2-3-0 in the group, and places second overall. It’s kind of funny that this team with three draws in five games actually has the highest goal differential of anyone in the entire tournament. Either we drew or won big! Newmanistan will take on Burgburgh next in the first ever meeting between the sides. The winner gets either Racing or Xanneria. Hopefully Mr. Rhule realizes that Racing is a country and doesn’t go looking for race cars.

[Racing]

>+> A report from Racing <+<

Racing is losing an important game against the natanians and Nosts. Finally it was a good victory against Southern Esportiva Union with five goals for Racing. this result is first place for racing in group c with four victories and 12 points. this is supposed to be a great news for racing and it is advancement to the Round of 16 matches. Racing is finishing in first place this means the opposing team in the Round of 16 must be an easy opponent. There is no fortunate in the draw for racing when the opponent is known to be Xanneria. This team for Xanneria is rank in spot four of the region Esportiva and there will be no other teams that can be a more difficult for Racing.

There is always a positive to consider for this team. If xanneria is rank in the four spot this means they are three spot worse than brenecia. Racing has already defeat Brenecia in this cup and of course if Racing can defeat Brenecia then racing can defeat any team to challenge in Campionato Esportiva.

Have a look at the performance of Racing.

Group C
Jeckland 2–1 Natanians and Nosts
Copper Cuprum 0–1 Brenecia
Racing 5–1 Southern Esportivan Union

  Group C                           Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Racing                              5   4  0  1   14   7  +7   12   Q
2 Brenecia                            5   4  0  1   15   8  +7   12   Q
3 Jeckland                            5   3  0  2   11  12  −1    9   Q
4 Southern Esportivan Union           5   2  0  3    8  15  −7    6   Q
5 Natanians and Nosts                 5   2  0  3    8   7  +1    6
6 Copper Cuprum                       5   0  0  5    2   9  −7    0

Tiebreakers: RCI over BRE and SEU over NTN, both on H2H results.


There is not many time that a better performance is found. Racing is the team having the second best record in the group stage of all the team participating in Campiontao Esportiva 26. The round of 16 against Xanneria will be contest at San Marmeng Municipal Stadium for Filindostan. Racing will have to play fast and defeat Xanneria to extend a great run. It will be time for Xanneria to be X'd out of the competition to permit the racing team to win this tournament for a first time.

[Southern Esportivan Union]

Continued from here...

"Well, yes, I know that, but, what options do we have?" asked West, before taking a drink of the water. He drank too fast and began to choke.

"Slow down, Sir. Have you considered putting out a call for a more capable nation to take over the country?" West looked up at the aide with the most quizzical of looks. "Peacefully, of course," hastily added the aide.

"And who exactly would you suggest to do that. Our closest neighbors, Raussland? Their government has been unusually quiet for decades. The Sword Bloke? They'd probably try to stab us. Newmanistan, Apox, Damukuni? Maybe, but what would they get out of it? And don't you dare suggest the Eurans. I'm sure they'd be all to happy to keep an island for a naval base and watch the rest sink into the ocean."

"None of those, Sir," said the aide as he walked over to the room's light switch. The lights went out and the room's lone window was covered with a curtain. The projector whirred to life and the aide pulled down the white screen, albeit with a bit of difficulty.

"Oh, dear lord. You've used PowerPoint again, haven't you?"

"No, that'd bore you. I'm just sticking to the internet," said the aide, as he typed a quickly typed a query in the search engine. The aide clicked on the first result. Agreement on the Formation of the Darmeni Commonwealth was the title of the database page. "Yes, yes, 1920 was a long time ago, but hear me out. All but the Lee Islands were... are... members of the Darmeni Commonwealth. And according to an archived Lee Islands government web page, the Prime Minister of the Lee Islands was at one point... Tor Tong Lee."

"Ok, and that all means what exactly?" asked West, the quizzical look still stuck on his face.

"We won't be asking any Esportivan nations to take over our sovereignty. And we won't be asking the Eurans either. We'll ask the Darmenis."

West sat silently for a moment with his mouth open. He finally began to speak as some drool attempted to escape from his mouth. "And you think they'll accept? Isn't their economy only just now beginning to recover from the collapse they suffered, what, thirty years ago? Do they even have the capabilities to meet our needs?"

"Yes."

"Yes... to which one?"

"All three of your questions, Sir. Depending on how you write your letter to them..."

"My letter?"

"Well, yeah, you'll have to write them a letter requesting that they take over the SEU's sovereignty. You'll explain to them that we don't have the resources to handle an environmental disaster, rise of organized crime and crushing national debt all at the same time. You'll ask them to be generous in helping us and loyal to their Commonwealth mates. Haven't quite figured out the humility part."

"Humility?"

"Yeah, Darmen's national motto and founding principles. 'Generosity, Humility, Loyalty.' Weren't you aware?"

"No. You keep speaking about the Commonwealth as if its still active, but I haven't had any communication with a single Darmeni government official since 2022. Is Darmen even bound by any sort of agreement?"

"I'll admit, whether or not the Darmeni Commonwealth still exists is a bit murky. We'll just have to claim that from our vantage point, we believe the agreement to still be active. And that'll mean they'll have to help. Your letter will appeal to both the moral obligation to help us and the legal obligation too. They can't refuse."

"But... if they do?" asked West, surprising himself that he was still allowing the aide to make this most ridiculous of suggestions.

"Worst case, they laugh at us. Best case, they give us a few million dollars in financial aid and we alleviate some of our debt problems."

West thought for a moment. The aide began to make another point in support of his suggestion, but West cut him off. "Have the national leaders report back here tomorrow for another meeting, I'll make the case to them and see what they think of it. Oh, and I'll need a few more details, maybe put out a feeler to the Darmeni government to figure out the likelihood they'll actually accept. Peel is going to be the most difficult sell. Pesky independent Frecmentans and all, y'know?"

"Yes, Sir."

[Jeckland]

BONGO JOHNSON VS. JECKLAND - MATCH PREVIEW

The History

Bongo Johnson - Ranked 15th, CE25 Group Stage
Jeckland - Unranked, CE25 Did Not Compete

The Story So Far - Bongo Johnson
Drew 0-0 vs. Vangaziland
Won 2-1 vs. Ethane
Won 3-2 vs. Mattjana
Lost 0-2 vs. Xanneria
Drew 1-1 vs. Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom

2nd in Group B (2-2-1, GD 0)

The Story So Far - Jeckland
Won 1-0 vs. Copper Cuprum
Lost 4-2 vs. Racing
Won 3-1 vs. Southern Esportivan Union
Lost 6-3 vs. Brenecia
Won 2-1 vs. Natanians and Nosts

3rd in Group C (3-0-2, GD -1)

Why I make Jeckland favourites
Despite their lower finishing position, Jeckland actually took more points from their group than their round of 16 opponents despite being a bottom seed. They also scored an impressive 11 goals in just 5 games, including 3 past Brenecia - no mean feat at all. Ross’ team looks like a cohesive unit going forward and is capable of playing some top quality football

Why Jeckland should be wary
Defence. The flipside to the 11 goals scored is the 12 conceded. The flipside to putting three past Brenecia is they put twice as many past Jeckland. Whilst they have looked decent defensively in three of their five games, when things have gone wrong they have gone very wrong very quickly. This looks to be a confidence issue which Ross will have to address before the match.

My Prediction
Bongo Johnson are a handy team, but with all due respect you’d expect a tougher opponent from a second placed group finisher. Jeckland will go into this one with less reason for the tentativeness that plagued them at times against the bigger teams in the group, and should have enough going forward to exploit an aggressive formation from their opponents. 2-1 Jeckland

OOC: Team is Clemens; Grey, Lovell, Gilbert, Pain; Graves, Sanderson, Gibbs; Martel, Stack, Dane

---

The Chicken Chronicles - Part Two

“So, what next?”

A question Woody Hamm often asked these board meetings, even though he already knew the answer he wanted. It was a chance to open up proceedings to the board, who sometimes came up with other good ideas. Woody would, as he was today, sit and listen patiently, offer pointers, before speaking himself and driving the meeting forward. Everyone in the room however knew the score, it was a strange ritualistic sequence of events that bore no real purpose other than the fact they’d always done things this way.

“Jeckland is ours.” Hamm said after the facade was over. “The next big idea isn’t what we need to be looking at right now. The products are pretty fucking good. Am I right?”

Murmurs of agreement and nods ensued.

“So instead of trying to sell more by making the products better, let’s just try and sell more.”

“How do you mean? We’ve got very limited scope for expansion in Jeckland.”

“In Jeckland” Hamm replied, putting an exaggerated emphasis on the last word. “The mutliverse is wide open. It’s not going to be easy, there is endless competition. But I think I know how to do it.”

“We have such a wide range of products revolving around Jeckish Chicken” Hamm said, lazily flicking on a Powerpoint slide. This was not a formal presentation, but he liked the pictures for emphasis. All of the branding for the Jecken line was on the screen in a cluster designed to seem overwhelming. “Introducing all this” he said, waving his arm around at the mass on screen “at once would be overwhelming for foreign markets not familiar with our brand.”

“Jeckish Chicken is brilliant food. But other countries have their own cuisine too. So we need to hit them where there’s a gap in their markets. What other companies are making restaurant quality food that you can eat in your seat at a sports stadium?” Hamm paused for dramatic effect, before clicking to a giant red circle around the Jecken Box on screen.

“We will of course, need brand awareness. And that’s where the second part of my plan comes in. We have a very large advertising budget for this, and we are going to fucking sponsor anything that moves to do with sport to push the Jecken Box. Stadiums, teams, players equipment. You name it, we’ll put our name to it. It’s as simple as that really.”

Hamm sat down, and leaned back in his chair. “Any questions?” he asked. After waiting a few seconds, he stood up and left the room. He would brief them on the details later.

OOC: This is an RP line other nations can get involved in. More details on that soon.

[Burgburgh]

Burgeoisie Bugle
Third Good Enough, Apparently
Percival Thompson

A very solid two-goals-to-none victory for the Ranchers over the ever-difficult-to-pronounce Fulghamous Peninsula on the final matchday of CE26's group stage... left us in third place of Group A. That's trailing regional heavyweights Damukuni and the mercurial Golden Lotus, while remaining above hosts Filindostan owing to our matchday three victory over them. Now, some may say this is me being old fashioned, but back in my day you needed to excel at what you do to gain recognition. Not only does the Burgeoisie have a game scheduled for a Round of Sixteen face-off with the Rockets of Newmanistan, but the hosts below us also moved moved on to the knockout stage. Four of six teams in each group progressed. I understand formats can be awkward in tournaments as small as the Campionato, but surely we can raise our standards so that you at least half to be in the top half of your crop? No? Perhaps I'm just out of touch, after all.

The Newmanistanians will be an interesting matchup, that's one thing we can be sure of. They had a very bizarre record in the group stages--two wins and three draws may seem run-of-the-mill, but a staggering plus-eight goal difference from those two wins outpaces even blatant favorites Brenecia. As such, it seems it will be paramount the Ranchers keep their defensive stance in order and keep the Rockets bottled up. If they don't run away with the game then they're liable to not break through at all, and should a game go to extra time I feel confident in saying that the stamina endowed upon our players from years in the fields will give us the advantage. Not the most exciting prediction in the world, but hey, if it works it works.

[Filindostan]

ROUND OF 16 CUTOFF

Whose nations are still on razor-sharp form coming into the knockout rounds?

---

ROUND OF 16 RESULTS

Damukuni 4–0 Kalactanian Esportiva Territories

Bongo Johnson 0–1 Jeckland

Mattijana 1–1 Brenecia (2–1 AET)

Hinodejin Empire 2–1 Filindostan
Scored by Delaclava

Xanneria 2–2 Racing (3–3 AET) (5–3 pen.)

Burgburgh 1–2 Newmanistan

The Golden Lotus 0–0 Ceyne Isles (1–0 AET)

Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom 0–3 Southern Esportivan Union

---

QUARTERFINALS FIXTURES

QF-1: Damukuni vs Jeckland
at Jakulta Esportiva Stadium, Jakulta

QF-2: Mattijana vs Hinodejin Empire
at Stadium Perouno, Bandarito

Match winners will meet each other at New San Rafael Stadium, San Rafael.

QF-3: Xanneria vs Newmanistan
at New San Rafael Stadium, San Rafael

QF-4: The Golden Lotus vs Southern Esportivan Union
at Filindostan National Stadium, San Marco

Match winners will meet each other at Stadium Perouno, Bandarito.

EDIT 1: Removed incorrect formatting syntax.

[Southern Esportivan Union]

From the desk of the

Chairman of the Southern Esportivan Union

Mr. Aston West

President Tor Tong Lee,

I am fairly certain that you're probably not that much aware of the situation here in the Southern Esportivan Union. But it has been brought to my attention that you are the person best suited to help us in our time of need.

I should start by first explaining the Southern Esportivan Union, or the SEU. The SEU is a union of six nations: Aissurop, Earo, Frecmenta, the Lee Islands, Naitpyge and Tanamera. The nations are united in the areas of economics and trade, foreign affairs and defense. In all other matters, the nations are free to chose their own paths forward in the pursuit of progress.

I'll now explain what our problem is. We're sinking.

In Earo, quite literally. The effects of climate change are rearing their ugly head, as several of our islands have either been fully submerged under Esportivan waters, or have experienced significant flooding. Many other Earon islands are in danger of suffering the same fate in the near future. This environmental disaster has caused significant harm, not just to the Earon economy which is almost entirely dependent on tourism and fishing, but on the residents of the islands, who have been forced from their homes and relocated to other islands.

Tanamera is safe from the rising ocean waters, but a flood of organized crime has been unleashed on the two islands making up this nation. Recently, evidence has been presented to suggest that the criminal activities of the brutal Vasilyev crime family is not confined solely to Tanamera, but has spread to all five of the other member nations. The SEU's security forces, the Public Safety Agency, is stretched extremely thin at this time and the local police forces of the SEU's islands I'm afraid aren't of much help. They lack the resources necessary to tackle the present crime problem, both in manpower and technology and I fear that without immediate and significant action, the islands of the SEU will find themselves under the control of a violent crime family rather than a democratically elected government.

And finally, there is the SEU as an organization, which is now sinking under the crushing weight of a massive public debt. Numerous projects have been undertaken by various administrations of the SEU in an attempt to improve the lives of the people living here. With only a handful of exceptions, most of these projects have met with failure, or, even upon their successful completion, have not delivered the improved living standards that were promised. We are in real danger of defaulting on our debt and with our international credit rating having never been that high to begin with, we're in real danger of having to declare bankruptcy. Doing so would only make it ever more impossible for the member nations of the SEU to deal with the pressing issues of our time.

Now, you may be thinking to yourself, 'That's a heart wrenching story, but why should I get involved?' and I don't blame you. Sometimes simple moral arguments in favor of a particular course of action are not enough to justify government intervention due to other competing moral arguments. This is one of the more unfortunate aspects of running
a government, but it seems unavoidable. So I shall make a legal argument as well.

In 1920, the then Kingdom of Darmen signed an agreement with several other nations creating the Darmeni Commonwealth. Aissurop, Earo, Frecmenta, Naitpyge and Tanamera were signatories to that agreement, having full member status and enjoying all the rights and responsibilities that membership in the Commonwealth gave them. It is the belief of myself and this administration that that agreement is still very much active and holds legal weight. While we recognize that the Kingdom of Darmen has ceased to exist as of January 1st, 2037, it is our belief that the present Republic of Darmen assumed all international legal responsibilities formerly held by the Kingdom, unless an explicit statement relinquishing responsibility from any international legal responsibility was made at that time. As far as the Agreement on the Formation of the Darmeni Commonwealth is concerned, we can find no record of any such statement being made.

It is therefore our belief that Darmen remains bound to the Agreement and particularly the clauses therein which relate to the aid of Commonwealth members.

We are therefore making an official request that the Republic of Darmen aid us in our time of need, through whatever means possible. Initially, I would like to begin by exchanging official Ambassadors between our nations, so that we can have a more effective line of communication and discuss the path ahead.

Sincerely,
Aston West, Chairman of the Southern Esportivan Union

[Jeckland]

SANDERSON STRIKES LATE TO SEND JECKLAND THROUGH

Reuben Sanderson scored just eight minutes from time to send Jeckland through to the quarter finals of the Campionato Esportiva for the first time ever, meeting Kayden Ross’ ambitious target for the team set before the competition.

Bongo Johnson went into the game as slight favourites and began the better of the two sides, with Bongald instantly causing problems for Lovell and Gilbert at the back. In the sixth minute he escaped both defenders and fired a shot which Clemens was forced to save low to his left, and another effort two minutes later fizzed narrowly wide. Jeckland’s problem with poor starts in this tournament did not cost them on this occasion though, as the three man midfield quickly began to assert control.

Jeckland utilised Bongo Johnson’s 3-4-3 formation to their advantage, with Sanderson playing a more advanced role in front of his midfield partners to put further pressure on the opposition’s three man defence. When out of possession, Sanderson and the wingers dropped back to form a 4-5-1 shape, starving their opponents of any further first half chances.

Sanderson was the key man in this game and was at the centre of most Jeckish chances in the first half. A lay-off to Gibbs saw his curling shot well saved by Jones, before a through ball for Martel was intercepted expertly by Hee with the pacy winger seemingly through on goal. His own effort from a free kick was horribly miscued, much to the displeasure of Brendan Pain, who had wanted to take the shot himself.

In the second half Jeckland continued their dominance without creating many clear cut chances. Stack had two shots blocked from tight angles as the pressure on the opposition defence grew. Scunt managed to give the defence a scare with a lovely step past Grey, but greedily decided to shoot when there were passing options on and missed the target. Compared to some of the enthralling group games this was not one for the neutrals, and looked to be heading to extra time until eight minutes were left on the clock.

Stack received the ball on the edge of the box with his back to goal and seemingly little support. Sanderson burst past his marker in midfield and was fed the ball to feet. Pushing the ball in front of him, he saw Forest, on as a sub, making a run down the left, and fed a through ball to him, not breaking stride. The Kyslo winger saw what was happening and returned the ball first time to Sanderson, now past the defenders on the left hand side of the box. A smart finish with the weaker foot and Jeckland were ahead.

Bongo Johsnon inevitably had the lion's share of possession from this point onward, but aside from a tame shot by Bongald which was easily saved, were unable to break down the stout Jeckish defence. The final whistle came to roars from the strong travelling Jeckish contingent, delighted to see the national football team having some success in tournaments at last.

---

DAMUKUNI VS. JECKLAND - MATCH PREVIEW

THE HISTORY
Damukuni - Ranked 5th, CE25 Quarter Finalists
Jeckland - Unranked, CE25 Did Not Compete

THE STORY SO FAR - DAMUKUNI
Won 3-1 vs. Burgburgh
Won 3-0 (by forfeit) vs. Filindostan
Drew 1-1 vs. The Golden Lotus
Lost 2-0 vs. Fhulghamous Peninsula
Won 3-1 vs. Ummat al-Haqiqa

1st in Group A (3-1-1, GD 5)

Ro16: Won 4-0 vs. Kalactinan Esportiva Territories

THE STORY SO FAR - JECKLAND
Won 1-0 vs. Copper Cuprum
Lost 4-2 vs. Racing
Won 3-1 vs. Southern Esportivan Union
Lost 6-3 vs. Brenecia
Won 2-1 vs. Natanians and Nosts

3rd in Group C (3-0-2, GD -1)

Ro16: Won 1-0 vs. Bongo Johnson

Reasons to be cheerful
Jeckland are looking stronger by the game, with Sanderson and Stack in particular in top form. The defence, which has been a problem at times in this tournament, looked good against Bongo Johnson, and a similar peformance will make it very hard for Damukuni to win. Damukuni themselves haven’t been tested hugely in this tournament, losing their only game to a team in the top ten and winning their other tough game against the hosts by forfeit

Reasons to be fearful
Despite all this, Damukuni are a better team than Jeckland - that’s just a fact. Any issues with the Jeckish defence can be easily exploited by a side who’ve registered three goals in four matches (admittedly they only scored them in three). Jeckland’s issues with slow starting in this tournament will be able to be exploited by such a strong attacking team.

My Prediction
Every part of me wants to say Jeckland will win this, but my head can’t look past Damukuni. That’s not to say that the Spuds don’t have a chance - they absolutely do - but I think their opponents will just be too strong. I pray to Margaret that I’m wrong, but I’m going 2-1 Damukuni.

OOC: Team is Clemens; Grey, Lovell, Gilbert, Pain; Graves, Sanderson, Gibbs; Martel, Stack, Dane

---

JECKLAND DAILY TIMES APOLOGY TO SOUTHERN ESPORTIVAN UNION

OOC: This refers to this RP in the BoF Thread

The Jeckland Daily Times would like to issue a formal apology to the people of the Southern Esportivan Union over the insensitive headline used in our recent report on the Campionato Esportiva match between the two nations.

This headline was not in any way intended to refer to the environmental disaster ongoing in the Southern Esportivan Union. Our condolences go out to all those affected by the terrible events happening in the nation recently.

Our writers have been reminded of their duties to do proper research in order to provide the high quality, informed journalism that Jeckland Daily Times prides itself on. We have fallen short and caused offence on this occasion and will ensure this does not happen again.

Guy Phillips
Jeckland Daily Times Editor

---

The Chicken Chronicles - Part Three

(Excerpt from jecken.jec, the Jecken website)

Jecken is officially launching its Sports Partnership Program, a scheme designed to support the growth of all sports in all nations.

Jecken has put aside a large pot of money in which to sponsor sporting endeavours large and small in all countries. These could include but are not limited to the sponsorships of teams, players and stadiums. Jecken believes in the power of sport to unite all people and would like to use its current position of strength to ensure that sport thrives across the multiverse.

Jecken is willing to provide this finance on a sponsorship basis. The receiving sporting institution would in turn issue either kit or stadium sponsorship rights to Jecken, as well as allowing Jecken to sell Jecken Boxes within its premises.

Any interested parties should contact the company via advertising@jecken.jec. Thank you for your interest.