The World Assembly Strangers' Bar

[Krioval]

"Ennish Shandy won't be strong enough I fear. I don't suppose you've got any Bahgumnian Blue Brandy skerricked away anywhere, would you?"

"They still make that?!" Henrik exclaimed, shocked. "Maybe there's hope for the Assembly yet."

[Mousebumples]

"They still make that?!" Henrik exclaimed, shocked. "Maybe there's hope for the Assembly yet."

"Make it three, Neville," Nikolas adds, wondering if finding a way to spike the Assembly's drinking supply might make for more tolerable (and entertaining) debates.

[Ardchoille]

It wasn't precisely a reaction. But the sight of Stephanie made Neville remember reacting. This was, after all, the woman who knew the secret of Ennish Shandy, the lust for which apparently still burned with a pure, clean fire deep within the conflicted and traumatised BarLord.

With a faint shadow of his former flair, he poured the drinks. Bahgumian Blue actually deserved a lot more -- a tucket at the least, perhaps a flourish, maybe even a fanfare -- but you went with what you had, and right now, clean glasses and relatively speedy service were all Neville could muster.

Plus a glass for himself, of course. Bahgumian Blue could put the leap upon the lame.

[Cardoness]

*Lord Andreas walked into the bar casting a look over his shoulder.*

"Neville, I'll take a scotch, neat, and you might want to call in some help, looks like half the Assembly is on their way."

*With that he took his class and picked out the best seat in the house to watch the show that was the WA Delegates*

[Ethel mermania]

Greetings from the Peoples republic of Ethel Mermania, a small country with a love of broadway musicals (wap) “ the first drone gets hit in the back of the head, by the second, who says “ for cryin out loud Larry, I am sick of hearing that crap, every time you get up . .. Greetings from the ….I swear, why don’t you let someone else talk. Wham the second drone goes down with a thud from a smack in the head from the third, He steps up to the bar and says “my good barkeep, scotch and water, hold the water for me, and white wine spritzers for my unconscious friends, that oughta teach em. Btw got any cheese platters ? I’m Starvin

[Eireann Fae]

for cryin out loud Larry

(OOC: Your whole post made me laugh in an out loud manner, but about this part in particular... I thought they were all nameless drones :p)

Rowan approaches the bar, careful to step over the fallen Mermanians. Her Faerie companion, Episky, flies up after her and lands on the bar. Knowing the bartender wouldn't understand the Faerie's order, the Human girl orders drinks for both of them. "A glass of ice water, and a thimbleful of good mead, please."

[Mesogiria]

for cryin out loud Larry

(OOC: Your whole post made me laugh in an out loud manner, but about this part in particular... I thought they were all nameless drones )

Rowan approaches the bar, careful to step over the fallen Mermanians. Her Faerie companion, Episky, flies up after her and lands on the bar. Knowing the bartender wouldn't understand the Faerie's order, the Human girl orders drinks for both of them. "A glass of ice water, and a thimbleful of good mead, please."

"There's tha' silly lil' fairy thingie," slurs Ambassador Rodriguez, who's evidently been hitting the bottle rather hard. "Always thought they was some kinda fairy-tale... hehehe, 'fairy-tale'... I jus' got that..." Ambassador Rodriguez dissolves into a fit of giggling, and slides off her chair, landing with a soft thump on the floor. It takes her about half a minute to get back to her feet.

"I don' mean no disrespect by tha'," she manages to say. "Jus' talkin' 'bout what I can schee." She waves awkwardly at the bartender. "The little lady and the fairy's drinks are on me."

Ambassador Rodriguez turns to the pair and smiles blearily.

"Like I said, I didn't mean nuthin' by it. I don' think I introduced meself properly," Rodriguez says, brow furrowed, thinking hard. "I'm Kelly Rodriguez, Ambassader of th' Imperial Commonwealth of Meso- *hic* Meso- *hic* Mesogiria. Nice to meecha..."

[Eireann Fae]

The Faerie Emissary looks over her should for a second, apparently looking for a tail, before her Human companion explains what a 'fairy-tale' actually is. Episky laughs at this, and makes a quick comment at Rodriguez's expense, which Rowan translates. "She says it's a wonder you can see anything in your current state." Faerie and child both smile at this, obviously joking. Rowan gestures to her diminutive companion and continues, "This is Episky, Emissary of the Community of Eireann Fae. I'm Rowan, her translator. Thanks for the drinks!" The girl raises her glass, and the Faerie her thimble, in appreciation. "So, do you always... have such a good time? Or are you celebrating something?"

[Unibot]

Eduard exploded into the bar, arriving from the past, stumbling beside the Faerie Emissary. "Err, hello, Episky, right?"

"A glass of Blue Curaçao. Straight." Eduard ordered to Jimmie, before drowning the glass in a second. "Needs to be stronger.. "

[Ethel mermania]

The standing drone turns and smiles at Rowan and Episky, raises his glass towards the girl and Faerae, and takes a sip, Thinks to himself I think I have been standing here a whole day, I gotta tip better). He then smiles and says:

“well that is our fearless leader for you, he believes in a political body we speak as one, it does not matter who among us is speaking, ethel mermanians speak in love and complete and full agreement with him” at the end of the short speech the delegate waits for Rowan to finish her translation and then points his finger toward his ear and rotates it in a counter clockwise fashion in the internation symbol for a cookoo.

He then continues “so when speaking in an international body, we are nameless, but of course we all have names, and live quite normal lives, aside from our fanatical love of broadway musicals.

Ooc: My memory is not the best. The less items I have to keep track of the better. One name for all my international dealings, and nameless drones seemed like an easy and unique way to do it. Glad to have made you laugh

for cryin out loud Larry

(OOC: Your whole post made me laugh in an out loud manner, but about this part in particular... I thought they were all nameless drones )

Rowan approaches the bar, careful to step over the fallen Mermanians. Her Faerie companion, Episky, flies up after her and lands on the bar. Knowing the bartender wouldn't understand the Faerie's order, the Human girl orders drinks for both of them. "A glass of ice water, and a thimbleful of good mead, please."

[Jankenjin]

With a faint shadow of his former flair, he poured the drinks. Bahgumian Blue actually deserved a lot more -- a tucket at the least, perhaps a flourish, maybe even a fanfare -- but you went with what you had, and right now, clean glasses and relatively speedy service were all Neville could muster.

"Baghumian Blue," mused the reddish pseudo-kangaroo creature. "That anything like creme de cacao?"

[Estafaniyya en Angelo]

Stephanie Fulton felt a change sweep through her. Something was... odd. Different to before. She glanced around, but couldn't see anything different. The Bar was as it had ever been, with its bizarre mismatch of ambassadors.

And yet...

On a hunch, she decided to have a quick look through her handbag. At her passport, in particular.

There it was.

"Neville! Keep those blue brandies coming, Lady Faren's just declared that Angelo and I are our own nation."

[Mesogiria]

The Faerie Emissary looks over her should for a second, apparently looking for a tail, before her Human companion explains what a 'fairy-tale' actually is. Episky laughs at this, and makes a quick comment at Rodriguez's expense, which Rowan translates. "She says it's a wonder you can see anything in your current state." Faerie and child both smile at this, obviously joking. Rowan gestures to her diminutive companion and continues, "This is Episky, Emissary of the Community of Eireann Fae. I'm Rowan, her translator. Thanks for the drinks!" The girl raises her glass, and the Faerie her thimble, in appreciation. "So, do you always... have such a good time? Or are you celebrating something?"

"Nice ta meetcha," slurs Rodriguez, patting her pockets. "Jus' a sec, got it here somewhere... aha!" The Ambassador produces a small white pill from an inner pocket and dry-swallows it. In just over a minute, most of her visible drunkenness dissipates.

"Ah, there we go. Alcohol-nullified, dead handy to carry around. Anyway, I am sort of celebrating something. You see its my wife's birthday, and I'm an awfully long way away from her, and there are no prospects for that to be changing any time soon. The reasons for that have to do with Mesogirian internal politics, which I can relate if you're really interested, but the short form is that I'm pissed off people with clout, and I won't be coming back from this WA post for a long, long time."

"And, now that I'm all sobered up, I feel like I want to drink again."

[Unibot]

Eduard sat down at his piano at the bar that he had his aide bring in. Eduard began to play a little ditty.

"Making your way in the World Assembly today takes all the patience you've got.
Take a break from passing all those resolutions, and just leave it to our lord and savior, Unibot.

Wouldn't you like to get away?

Sometimes you want to go ...

Where nobody knows this is a *cough* game *cough* um.. flame,
and you're weird like *points to a sober Rodriguez* her if you're tame.
You wanna be where you can see,
A talking bear who has a name..
You wanna be where everybody knows
The Security Council is always to blame!"

Eduard smacked his hands down on the piano and started to howl, "Get some." Heir stood up from his piano and in the process of walking over to the isle to grab a fresh scotch, he gave a slight.. er.. slap on the touche to Ambassador Rodriguez.. to the shock and awe of the reporters outside who couldn't believe a drunk, abusive billionaire playboy would objectify women like that.

[Mesogiria]

Eduard sat down at his piano at the bar that he had his aide bring in. Eduard began to play a little ditty.

"Making your way in the World Assembly today takes all the patience you've got.
Take a break from passing all those resolutions, and just leave it to our lord and savior, Unibot.

Wouldn't you like to get away?

Sometimes you want to go ...

Where nobody knows this is a *cough* game *cough* um.. flame,
and you're weird like *points to a sober Rodriguez* her if you're tame.
You wanna be where you can see,
A talking bear who has a name..
You wanna be where everybody knows
The Security Council is always to blame!"

Eduard smacked his hands down on the piano and started to howl, "Get some." Heir stood up from his piano and in the process of walking over to the isle to grab a fresh scotch, he gave a slight.. er.. slap on the touche to Ambassador Rodriguez.. to the shock and awe of the reporters outside who couldn't believe a drunk, abusive billionaire playboy would objectify women like that.

Ambassador Rodriguez, however, remained thoroughly un-shocked by the blatant chauvinism, and only slightly awed, mainly in connection to the silly pit of piano music.

"You've such lovely hands, sir to play the piano so well," she said, with an acid smile. "If you want to keep them in good shape, maybe keeping them to yourself is a good plan, no?"

[Unibot]

Eduard sat down at his piano at the bar that he had his aide bring in. Eduard began to play a little ditty.

"Making your way in the World Assembly today takes all the patience you've got.
Take a break from passing all those resolutions, and just leave it to our lord and savior, Unibot.

Wouldn't you like to get away?

Sometimes you want to go ...

Where nobody knows this is a *cough* game *cough* um.. flame,
and you're weird like *points to a sober Rodriguez* her if you're tame.
You wanna be where you can see,
A talking bear who has a name..
You wanna be where everybody knows
The Security Council is always to blame!"

Eduard smacked his hands down on the piano and started to howl, "Get some." Heir stood up from his piano and in the process of walking over to the isle to grab a fresh scotch, he gave a slight.. er.. slap on the touche to Ambassador Rodriguez.. to the shock and awe of the reporters outside who couldn't believe a drunk, abusive billionaire playboy would objectify women like that.

Ambassador Rodriguez, however, remained thoroughly un-shocked by the blatant chauvinism, and only slightly awed, mainly in connection to the silly pit of piano music.

"You've such lovely hands, sir to play the piano so well," she said, with an acid smile. "If you want to keep them in good shape, maybe keeping them to yourself is a good plan, no?"

Eduard grabbed the bottle of scotch that Jimmy was using to pour, "give me that..", and walked over to the Ambassador, grinning, "now why on Earth would I want to keep my fingers in good shape -- its not everyday that I get to chance pure agony to grope a gorgeous feminist like yourself. It's probably more on a bi-monthly basis, really."

[Eireann Fae]

Eduard grabbed the bottle of scotch that Jimmy was using to pour, "give me that..", and walked over to the Ambassador, grinning, "now why on Earth would I want to keep my fingers in good shape -- its not everyday that I get to chance pure agony to grope a gorgeous feminist like yourself. It's probably more on a bi-monthly basis, really."

"Sir," began Rowan, addressing Eduard with a smirk, "would that be twice a month, or once every two months?" (OOC: couldn't help it :p)

Turning her attention to Rodriguez, the girl continues. "That is a delightful bit of medicine you've got there. I wonder, though, if its effects would even begin to influence our Unibotan friend here," she says with a smile. "Anyway, what ever did you do to deserve getting sent to the Assembly? Episky is our most skilled diplomat, and I, being a linguist, wanted more exposure to as many cultures as possible. But it seems you're not here by choice. So..."

"That's not vodka, I hope!" a new voice calls, from near the door. The owner of the voice may quickly be identified as a slender woman of pale complexion, no more than a meter and a half in height, her brilliant cherry-red hair setting off her sparkling green eyes. The woman approached the Fae delegates, and nodded her greeting to Episky after a brief hug with the girl. Turning her attention to the woman Rowan had just addressed, the newcomer did the same. "Sorry for the intrusion. My name is Mary Jane, I'm Rowan's caregiver. She wasn't lying about wanting to be here, either. I couldn't pull her away if I wanted! But do tell, now that we're all so intrigued... what brings you here?"

[Unibot]

Eduard grabbed the bottle of scotch that Jimmy was using to pour, "give me that..", and walked over to the Ambassador, grinning, "now why on Earth would I want to keep my fingers in good shape -- its not everyday that I get to chance pure agony to grope a gorgeous feminist like yourself. It's probably more on a bi-monthly basis, really."

"Sir," began Rowan, addressing Eduard with a smirk, "would that be twice a month, or once every two months?" (OOC: couldn't help it )

Eduard smiled, "Um, both." (ooc: Nice septuple post)

Turning her attention to Rodriguez, the girl continues. "That is a delightful bit of medicine you've got there. I wonder, though, if its effects would even begin to influence our Unibotan friend here," she says with a smile. "Anyway, what ever did you do to deserve getting sent to the Assembly? Episky is our most skilled diplomat, and I, being a linguist, wanted more exposure to as many cultures as possible. But it seems you're not here by choice. So..."

Eduard began drinking the entire bottle of scotch without moderation or pause.

[Eireann Fae]

(OOC: Thanks for giving me time to delete the repeat posts :-)

[Ethel mermania]

(OOC: Thanks for giving me time to delete the repeat posts :-)

ooc: no wonder mary jane thought rowan was hititng the vodka.

[Mesogiria]

g
Turning her attention to Rodriguez, the girl continues. "That is a delightful bit of medicine you've got there. I wonder, though, if its effects would even begin to influence our Unibotan friend here," she says with a smile. "Anyway, what ever did you do to deserve getting sent to the Assembly? Episky is our most skilled diplomat, and I, being a linguist, wanted more exposure to as many cultures as possible. But it seems you're not here by choice. So..."

"That's not vodka, I hope!" a new voice calls, from near the door. The owner of the voice may quickly be identified as a slender woman of pale complexion, no more than a meter and a half in height, her brilliant cherry-red hair setting off her sparkling green eyes. The woman approached the Fae delegates, and nodded her greeting to Episky after a brief hug with the girl. Turning her attention to the woman Rowan had just addressed, the newcomer did the same. "Sorry for the intrusion. My name is Mary Jane, I'm Rowan's caregiver. She wasn't lying about wanting to be here, either. I couldn't pull her away if I wanted! But do tell, now that we're all so intrigued... what brings you here?"

"Its complicated like I said, and requires a bit of background," said Rodriguez, after greeting Ms. Jane and introducing herself. "Maybe we should sit down somewhere more comfortable." Once they were, she went on.

"About a hundred and fifty years ago, the Imperial Commonwealth, which was a lot more imperial back then, fought a series of nasty wars with a collection of states on our eastern border. These border states had formed a coalition with the intent of facing down the Commonwealth, which at that time was under taking an expansionist foreign policy. The end result was that the Imperial Commonwealth managed to over-run and subjugate those border states, with much attendant bloodshed on both sides, military and civilian. These states were incorporated directly into the Commonwealth, and held under military law because of prolonged terrorism and guerrilla warfare."

"Now, the Imperial Commonwealth is almost entirely a human-populated nation, except for these former border states, collectively known as the Eastern Woodlands. The Eastern Woodlands were, and to a large extent, still are, populated by by elves. You know, humanoids, pointy ears, live in harmony with nature, haughty disrespect for industrialized peoples?"

"Anyway, the brutal wars and the protracted occupation add up to quite a bit of bad blood on both sides. Elves still face legal discrimination in the Eastern Woodlands, rights of residency and citizenship of elves are subject to heavy restrictions, not to mention the fact that those territories are still under military law and control."

"Add in the fact that, before the Violet Revolution forty years ago, the Commonwealth's government had a rather cavalier disregard for things like 'due process' and 'civil and political rights,' and you end up with a God-awful mess in the Eastern Woodlands."

"We've been trying to clean out all the crap left over from the days of the dictators and race warriors, but the work of three centuries can't be over-turned in only forty years without tearing a society apart at the seams, and we can't have that either. The progress is real: eleven legislatures are elected in every Eastern Woodland territory, due process and nearly all of civilian law has been reintroduced, military occupation is being phased out, and the like."

Ambassador Rodriguez paused, realizing she'd perhaps gone too far with the 'background.'

"Sorry, where was I? Ah, right, got it. Taking all of the above into consideration, you might image the issue of the Eastern Woodlands Occupied Territories is a contentious political issue. The current ruling party, the Conservative Democrats, are adamant that the EW be properly integrated into Mesogiria on an equal partnership with our other states, provinces, associated territories, and districts. They are also quite adamant that political independence for the EW, or any part thereof, is impossible and unacceptable."

"I, a senior member of the President's legal advisory team, made some accidentally public remarks indicating that maybe letting the EW go its own way would be for the best. I also inadvertently phrased my statements in such a way that one could have drawn the inference that I was expressing racially-motivated contempt for the elven residents and subjects of the EW. I assure you that I was not, but the press would have seized on the matter."

"So I was given the choice to either be Mesogiria's ambassador to the WA, and now our regional delegate as well (which is nice: I draw separate paychecks for each), and say the hell away for the rest of the Conservative Democrats' stay in power, or face Presidential Dismissal and revocation of my legal licenses."

"So here I am, far away from where my stupidity can hurt the government, and far away from where I can be with my Ellen."

[Eireann Fae]

Episky started to feign sleep somewhere around the time the Violet Revolution was mentioned; a ruse she dutifully kept up throughout the rest of the tale. When the Mesogirian Ambassador finished talking, the Faerie Emissary snored 'loudly' (not very, considering her size, but audibly) for a few more moments, before 'snapping awake' and pretending to be embarrassed. Rowan giggled a bit at the Faerie's charade, and Mary Jane smiled at the diminutive creature before turning her gaze to Rodriguez and addressing her.

"I see. I'm no diplomat by any means, but Rowan here has told me just how easily people can get offended in political talks. I think I'm with you, though. No body of people should be forced to integrate with any other. Faeries and Humans of Eireann Fae live together by choice, but we certainly wouldn't stop a community of either from breaking off and declaring their own independence. With forced integration, the best you can hope for is a grudging tolerance for the political powers that be. At worst, you may get a civil war - even genocide. For what it's worth, I think the Eastern Woodlands should be allowed to go their own way."

"I agree," said Rowan, with her Faerie companion nodding her own agreement. At this point, Mary went to order a glass of brandywine. The girl continued, "My entire political 'career' has been as translator for Episky at the Assembly, so I don't know much about politics on a national or regional level; just what I hear in the chambers during debates. Why is your government so resistant to giving the Elves their freedom? Are they subjugating an entire race just for land-based resources or something? Also, what precisely did you say that was construed as racist contempt, if you don't mind my asking? And on an even more personal note, why could your wife not accompany you to the WA? I hope I'm not being too personal..."

At this point, Mary Jane returned with her drink and took her seat. "Ooh, something personal..." All three turned their attention to Rodriguez, yearning for more.

[Mesogiria]

Episky started to feign sleep somewhere around the time the Violet Revolution was mentioned; a ruse she dutifully kept up throughout the rest of the tale. When the Mesogirian Ambassador finished talking, the Faerie Emissary snored 'loudly' (not very, considering her size, but audibly) for a few more moments, before 'snapping awake' and pretending to be embarrassed. Rowan giggled a bit at the Faerie's charade, and Mary Jane smiled at the diminutive creature before turning her gaze to Rodriguez and addressing her.

"I see. I'm no diplomat by any means, but Rowan here has told me just how easily people can get offended in political talks. I think I'm with you, though. No body of people should be forced to integrate with any other. Faeries and Humans of Eireann Fae live together by choice, but we certainly wouldn't stop a community of either from breaking off and declaring their own independence. With forced integration, the best you can hope for is a grudging tolerance for the political powers that be. At worst, you may get a civil war - even genocide. For what it's worth, I think the Eastern Woodlands should be allowed to go their own way."

"I agree," said Rowan, with her Faerie companion nodding her own agreement. At this point, Mary went to order a glass of brandywine. The girl continued, "My entire political 'career' has been as translator for Episky at the Assembly, so I don't know much about politics on a national or regional level; just what I hear in the chambers during debates. Why is your government so resistant to giving the Elves their freedom? Are they subjugating an entire race just for land-based resources or something? Also, what precisely did you say that was construed as racist contempt, if you don't mind my asking? And on an even more personal note, why could your wife not accompany you to the WA? I hope I'm not being too personal..."

At this point, Mary Jane returned with her drink and took her seat. "Ooh, something personal..." All three turned their attention to Rodriguez, yearning for more.

"Sorry about that," said Rodriguez, blushing a bit. "I was a specialist in Occupational and Martial Law, and sometimes get to talking beyond the need of it. But about your questions..."

"The Conservative Democrats," said Rodriguez, injecting an incredible amount of scorn into the name with her tone, "Contend that the Eastern Woodlands have to remain part of Mesogiria for three reasons. First, they think that granting the EW full equality and consideration will undermine the Separatists and Anti-Unionists, eliminate the desire for independence. Being fierce patriots, bordering on nationalists, they can't allow any part of Mesogiria to break away. It'd kick their ideology in the teeth. Second, the EW contain the headwaters and origins of waterways that provide nearly 60% of our water supply. An independent EW could do nasty things if we ever got to quarreling with them. Third, the EW occupies a key strategic position between Mesogiria proper, and our rival states of Pixxyland and Smolenski. An independent EW would almost certainly be armed and financed by our enemies, and they would have what amounts to a forward base inside Mesogiria in case of war."

"Sorry, there I go again," Rodriguez apologized, fearing glazed looks in her listeners' eyes. "A lot of the CD's ideas are bullshit, but its popular bullshit at the moment."

"The so-called racial comment was, if I recall it exactly: 'Just let them go, and we cut the bastards off at the knees. The offensive parts is the 'bastards' part. A now-abolished policy, developed just after the end of the initial war, sought to break the Elvish culture by annulling all Elvish marriages and removing the 'bastard' children to state-run orphanages, where they could be raised away from Elvish culture. Disgusting and barbaric, and thankfully behind us, but calling an elf a bastard is a double-insult of the lowest order."

"I was talking about the Republicanists, the CD's main political rival, and how resolving the EW matter would cut a large part of the Republicanists' support out from under them. Not that the media would have paid any attention to that."

"Something personal... right." Rodriguez turned red again, but this time out of anger. "Ellen is stuck back in Tyferrah, the federal capital, fighting a nasty legal battle with her ex-husband. The court has to rule on who will get custody of our... their children. The son of a bitch is on trial for attempted murder. They arrested him after he nearly killed my Ellen, but there was a fuck-up with the judge at the first trial, and then the courthouse caught fire and they had to change venues, and now the whole trial schedule is shot to hell for the time-being and the family court can't award custody until after the criminal trial and... and God-damn it I miss them."

Rodriguez looked like she wanted to punch someone, hard and more than once. She closed her eyes and focused on counting to ten, very slowly and carefully. It helped, a little.

"I'm really sorry about that," she said, when she could speak again. "I... I didn't mean for it to come out like that."

[Eireann Fae]

Rowan sat biting her lip with her eyes downcast, feeling the Ambassador's pain. Episky drained her thimble of mead and flew off to get a refill. Mary Jane closed her eyes and shook her head for a few seconds, clearly feeling Rodriguez's anger. She took a healthy swig of her brandywine before speaking. "As if the corrupt, power hungry government living in constant fear of their neighbours wasn't bad enough, you also have to deal with more family issues than I possibly could. I can't say I understand your pain, but I can certainly feel it in you. Here's to getting your kids, and building a life without Ellen's troubled past haunting either of you." The woman raises her glass and takes a sip. "No one can blame you for expressing such dire pain as you must feel. You've no need to apologize."

Rowan nods solemnly before speaking herself. "If they're so concerned about the Elves joining forces with your neighbours, shouldn't they do everything they can to appease the Eastern Woodlands? Like Mary said, what if the Elves are so distraught with their situation, they bring on a civil war and call in reinforcements from Pixxyland and Smolenski anyway? Has nobody tried to suggest an alliance with a prospective Eastern Woodlands State? If you give them their independence and become valuable trading partners and allies, what reason would they have to go against you? It seems to me that their very location could be a danger to your water supplies if they so choose. Why not give them what they want and work with them, rather than risking a domestic attack?"

[Unibot]

Eduard moved in closer to Rodriguez, nursing the rest of his scotch. "Darling, the solution to your problem is...."

Heir leaped back on to his piano, singing in the Key of D..

Hey Hey, all right, A Refendum, is what you need.

Dum Daisy Do, Daisy, Dum Daisy Do.

When those blood-sucking separatists want to secede.

Dum Daisy Do, Daisy, Dum Daisy Do.

You just set up a poll, and cry a little.

Dum Daisy Do, Daisy, Dum Daisy Do.

About having a hole in your map, right in the middle.

Dum Daisy Do, Daisy, Dum Daisy Do.

It'll be bad for trade, and will cause impotency.

Dum Daisy Do, Daisy, Dum Daisy Do.

If you didn't see the new anti-sovereign ads, click your remote to Channel Three!

Dum Daisy Do, Daisy, Dum Daisy Do.

Hey! What a beautiful day to run an referendum..

Dum Daisy Do, Daisy, Dum Daisy Do.

,,, and exploit the half that doesn't want to separate 'em.