Copa Rushmori XXXII Everything Thread

[Qusmo]

Warning for language.

Chapter I.

Chapter II.

“I don’t care what the hell that cunt says; it’s not fucking happening.”

“My god,” Azeld-Nexev Xlo gasped. “You realize you’re talking about -”

“I don’t give a flying fuck who I’m talking about. This is disgraceful. This is unacceptable.”

“That kind of talk is treason!”

“No, Kev, what they did was treasonous.” Drolx-Dalox Aka, Qusmi Bez, was livid. “They’re trying to bring down the government of Qusmo & take power for their fucking self. That’s called a coup, goddamnit, & if they were anyone else in this country, they’d be given a life sentence. So cut your bullshit; I don’t give a damn about niceties, not after that display.” A hush fell over the room. “Damnit, somebody fucking say something!”

“My Qusmi Bez, I know you’re upset -”

“Damn right,” Aka interrupted.

Welar-Linot Ono ignored the outburst. “But you have to stay calm. We can work through this. We can turn this around & use it to our advantage. We can emerge even stronger than before. But we need to stay calm & stay the course; it’s a delicate needle to thread, & we need to do it right.”

Aka paused. “Yes. Yes, you’re right. We can do this. We can get that bastard.” They then turned around, & they suddenly noticed that Frolt-Ralox Kev looked quite pale. “Kev, what’s wrong? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“What - what are you planning to do?” Kev stammered.

Aka smiled. “I’m going to bring down the Qastyry.”

Ekwadup Qusma
Qusmo 2–0 Schottia
Pridnestrovia 2–3 Olastor

  Ekwadup Qusma          Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Qusmo                    1   1  0  0    2   0  +2    3
2 Olastor                  1   1  0  0    3   2  +1    3
3 Pridnestrovia            1   0  0  1    2   3  −1    0
4 Schottia                 1   0  0  1    0   2  −2    0

Qusmo kicks off Qopa XXXII with dream opening match win
Qusmo 2–0 Schottia
Mastad Qusma, Qanz, Qusmo (cap. 80 000)

---

GK  Xynat-Evela Cuf
CB  Cunix-Betva Tla
CB  Yelto-Alfan Ono
CB  Zenon-Gerol Kal
DM  Jerat-Jonto Jan
71’ Ilinx-Vulav Ixi
CM  Ilinx-Kepex Zev (83’)
AM  Gavax-Nenzi Abe
LM  Helek-Nenzi Ono
78’ Ozolx-Mazur Guv
RM  Forzu-Ralox Kal
SS  Paliv-Xilit Max
78’ Prant-Pertz Gor
ST  Xilit-Zaxac Yol (90+2’)

[Eura]

Lights lifted the gloom over a hushed table. It was Bastion, at a very late hour, and the PM had a question. 'I have to ask, and please don't laugh - do we take this seriously? The state of Falcus has vanished and been replaced by an entity that seemed to confuse Euran Atomics customer services email address with our diplomatic service.' Needless to say, the email from Queen Alyssiana of Falkyr's office had not found its intended target.
'...Prime Minister?'
'No, really.' She threw down a briefing pack. 'A "dimensional disaster".' I know there have been some strange goings on over the years - we all remember Saintland.' A collective shudder and nervous collar pull traveled around the room. 'But this is taking the piss. I take it the Foreign Office doesn't have an explanation yet Ian? As to how a country within Rushmore has simply vanished its government in favour of a brand new one by virtue of some science fiction explanation?' Eura is a practical nation, its economy and way of life guided by computers and rational science and political organisation and, you know, normality. Its reaction to the supernatural, when it allegedly occurred abroad, was to shrug and ignore it at best, or ignore it out of perplexed terror at worst. This couldn't be ignored given that it was in Rushmore - and for Eura at least, anything happening in Rushmore counts as "on our doorstep".
'Ma'am, I can assure you our diplomats have been earnest in their attempts to make contact with the government of Falcus through the usual channels. We simply can't find the old lot.'
'But you haven't found anyone? Not even relatively junior ranking officials?'
'No.' She tapped her desk impatiently with a pen. The PM was unusually terse even by her standards these days. 'Bloody hell. It feels like I've been the head of government since the stone age yet every time we try to push forward our domestic legacy, with a bloody big majority, we're knocked off course by some ludicrous foreign drama.'

Another reason why the Euran cabinet had been convened like this was because of Helving, the small protectorate on what was the coast of Falcus. It wasn't very big, but had been highly urbanised and was home to a significant Euran military and industrial presence that had grown rapidly over the years, despite a blockade and siege by the Sameban's during the war. Three million Euran citizens were living there, a drop in the ocean of the nation but nevertheless enough people to matter for something. This partially drove the PM's concerns. 'Regardless of what they are claiming about refugees, I think it is imperative that we close Helving's borders for at least a short period. This could be a prelude to some kind of misguided offensive to take the territory. After what happened with Sameba I'm not sure we can trust anybody. What if Liventia is under threat?' Unusually one of the cabinet was brave enough to openly laugh at one of her suggestions. Very risky behaviour in the current political context. 'I'm sorry Olivia, did you have something you wanted to contribute?'
'I do apologise Prime Minister but this is Falcus we're talking about. Its not like Valladares has gone nuclear or Sargossa is blowing up Polarian oil rigs. Its a relatively peaceful country that minds its own business and has no historical grudge or territorial claim regarding Helving, nor against any other neighbours to our knowledge. They're not going to jolly well march in are they?' The PM was unable to hide how continually perturbed she was by the explanations of events being given, but she chose to accept the point and move on.

In the background the Minister for the Common Rushmori Community, still a relatively new portfolio, tried to inject some positivity into the discussion. 'Look, maybe we shouldn't be obsessing over the what's and the how's or even the who's. Clearly there's been a change in regime one way or the other. This is an opportunity to grow the Community further...with ourselves at the head of it naturally.' There was a murmur of agreement. The Liberal government enjoyed nothing more than to put on a big show of diplomacy and international leadership. 'Indeed, I'd like to propose we take immediate action. We should be among the first to meet the, err, Falkyrians? Intelligence?'
'We don't know either.'
'Right. Point is, let's meet them now. Welcome them to the family without thinking too hard about how they got here and offer aid to deal with these problems they are having. Demonstrate our desire to get them on the track towards Community membership. Its exactly what we should be doing.' A few other bootlickers of the careerist Rushmore Secretary agreed. 'Absolutely Carl, you're completely right.'
'This is just soooo us.'
''I'd just like to add that I think the Minister's proposal is truly visiona-'
'Alright! Alright.' The PM winced. She regretted appointing so many of the new intake to cabinet. For a political juggernaut that had dominated the last decade of Euran politics, the Liberal Party had a lot of unhelpful loose change in its parliamentary wallet. Yes men the lot of them.

More discussion followed but in essence the cabinet agreed to reach out to the new government of Falcus, or Falkyr as Eurans would now get used to calling it. The Foreign Office would commission an official response to the apparent Queen of this new political entity. Aid would be provided by the mighty Euran state to assist with the refugee population of Falcus, distributed via Helving like it was a giant, open air warehouse for a supermarket chain. Dozens of military transport aircraft and chartered civilian cargo jets would haul the mail, so to speak. The provisions would flood over the border, although quietly Eura would keep its own side of the Falkyr/Helving boundary firmly shut until it knew more about its new neighbour. As cabinet filtered out the PM discreetly asked a core group to remain; the Foreign Secretary, the Minister of Defence, the head of the civil service and the Chief of Staff. Initially the head of the OSI and the Minister for Overseas Territories had wandered off but they were soon returned to the room. 'Listen, while I have approved the course of action discussed, we need a contingency in case this goes south. What's the current status of Helving as an entity? Could it survive on its own for a period?'
'Yes Prime Minister. There was obviously some damage during the war and an influx of refugees from the Federal mainland but reconstruction was completed a while ago. They are energy self sufficient and only rely on Falcus for some of their water supply, but by no means a critical amount. If Falkyr turns out to be a basket case we could always find a solution to this.'

She was contented by this information but it wasn't just the civil administrative aspects or economic issues that bothered Eura's indomitable leader. 'And militarily? General Malcolm?'
'Nothing to cause alarm ma'am. The port and aviation facilities are in good shape and the Helving Basin Force was well equipped in response to lessons learned against the Sameban siege. If it turns out there is any ill intent from across the border they can handle themselves. If, on the other hand, you think it is necessary to prepare for the contingency of expeditionary operations over the map lines then we'll need some time. The Admiralty inform me that their nearest carrier group is some way away, and beyond the cargo lift they are preparing I'm not sure yet what capacity the air force have. They're being stretched supplying the Provisional Administration in Sameba.' The "PA" as it was known was a euphemism for the Euran occupation and ongoing political integration of its oldest enemy. 'Thank you General. I don't think we are at that stage but get thinking about it. In the meantime let's get on the front foot with reaching out to them and analysing what exactly is happening over there. If these people are genuine then its beholden on us to help. Let's get our allies involved too, Liventia at a bare minimum. Thanks.'
'Sorry, excuse me, erm, there is one more thing!' Lo and behold, the Minister for Sport had weaseled his way back in. The PM didn't have the heart to tell him to leave, he was going to be reshuffled out soon anyway. The man was as nervous as a toddler at the dentist. 'What?'
'Its the Copa Rushmori Prime Minister, erm, you see, we're playing Falcus, I mean Falkyr - sorry, sorry, we're playing them in our first game. I thought you should know.'
'Shit. Well then. Looks like we'll be getting to know them soon after all.' She smiled to herself. Her next appointment was with the new manager Michael Brandon. Now they had something to talk about that actually interested her.

[Taeshan]

For the second Copa Rushmori in a row the Purple Knights of Taeshan got to play the squad from Crystalline Caverns in the Group Stage. This time it was in the opening game of the that Group Stage and the Knights were once again able to come away with a strong 1-0 victory in that match. The game saw the debut of Wilhelm Nkitilina as one of the two forwards, and the second half would also see the debut of another teenager as Yoshimi Hirahito earned his first international cap coming in to spell Captain Randall Abl Bakr. The game was an overall well played performance by the team in Purple and hopefully it will mark a beginning of a strong tournament.

Nkitilina was not the only new starter, but he was the only one thrust from not being on the team to the first XI. Santiago Santiago and Shiloh Morgenstern meant the whole left side of the field was earning their first starting run in Taeshan team history. It was a strong performance from the side and the first half goal from Alson Figeuroa allowed the Knights to play behind their strong defense for the rest of the game. It was a very strong performance, and Miles Snavely didn't have to limber up his old body to save the side as he had to many a time in the last qualifiers. The second half saw a strong display from substitute Nycolas Jackson, as well as debut from Elaine Matheiu and Yoshimi Hirahito meaning that the Knights managed to somehow end the game with an even younger squad than they started it.

[Qusmo]

No one will be eliminated after Matchday Two, but be careful not to start your comeback up the table to the knockouts too late. (Translation)

Ekwadup Qusma
Schottia 0–1 Olastor
Qusmo 0–0 Pridnestrovia

  Ekwadup Qusma          Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Olastor                  2   2  0  0    4   2  +2    6
2 Qusmo                    2   1  1  0    2   0  +2    4
3 Pridnestrovia            2   0  1  1    2   3  −1    1
4 Schottia                 2   0  0  2    0   3  −3    0

Ekwadup Vaspola
Saintland 3–1 Oberour Ar Moro
Nephara 5–2 Darmen

  Ekwadup Vaspola        Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Nephara                  2   2  0  0    7   2  +5    6
2 Saintland                2   1  0  1    3   3   0    3
3 Oberour Ar Moro          2   0  1  1    4   6  −2    1
4 Darmen                   2   0  1  1    5   8  −3    1

Ekwadup Tumata
Tcherec 0–3 Mytanija
Sargossa 4–3 Cassadaigua

  Ekwadup Tumata         Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Sargossa                 2   2  0  0    9   3  +6    6
2 Mytanija                 2   1  1  0    4   1  +3    4
3 Cassadaigua              2   0  1  1    4   5  −1    1
4 Tcherec                  2   0  0  2    0   8  −8    0

Ekwadup Serana
Falkyr 1–0 Crystalline Caverns
Eura 0–1 Taeshan

  Ekwadup Serana         Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Taeshan                  2   2  0  0    2   0  +2    6
2 Eura                     2   1  0  1    2   2   0    3
3 Falkyr                   2   1  0  1    2   2   0    3
4 Crystalline Caverns      2   0  0  2    0   2  −2    0

Ekwadup Fedala
Queer Poco el Mono Ara 2–2 The Askari Union
Savojarna 3–1 Eastfield Lodge

  Ekwadup Fedala         Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Savojarna                2   2  0  0    7   3  +4    6
2 The Askari Union         2   1  1  0    4   2  +2    4
3 Queer Poco el Mono Ara   2   0  1  1    4   6  −2    1
4 Eastfield Lodge          2   0  0  2    1   5  −4    0

Ekwadup Refora
Bernegastad 1–4 Mareibat
Valladares 1–3 Pasarga

  Ekwadup Refora         Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Pasarga                  2   2  0  0    6   1  +5    6
2 Mareibat                 2   1  0  1    4   4   0    3
3 Valladares               2   1  0  1    3   4  −1    3
4 Bernegastad              2   0  0  2    2   6  −4    0

Advancing to Octofinals

[Falkyr]

Alyssiana struggled to stifle a chuckle as cadet after cadet scrambled to attention, each in varying states of undress. A light-hearted moment was needed on a dour day. It was her first time visiting the Skysreach barracks in years, cutting through to get to the cells. Never an auspicious moment when that's required.

She swung open the holding room door, drawing a snap to attention from Andres and a curious stare from the extremely large man seated next to him. The Queen allowed herself the barest moment of surprise--he was nearly as tall as the marshal while sitting--before returning her attention to Andres. "Status?"

"Extraction underway, with no major complications. There was much confusion, as expected, but all the... Falconians, is it?" The large man nodded. "Yes, then, the Falconians were remarkably non-aggressive and compliant. We're rationing out as many as we can to hostels around town and the engineer core is setting up temporary camps to the northeast for the inevitable overflow."

"How temporary?" The real question was who got the core involved without her orders, but that's a matter for another time.

"A few weeks, maybe two months if we devote enough staff to keep things orderly and clean? We'll need a relocation plan sooner than later, in any case."

Alyssiana deadpanned at him, drawing an incoherent mumble and downward glance. "Every day matters, marshal." Finally, she turned to address their guest. "Might I ask your name?"

"Sjurd Stendahl, ma'am. Former football star, current homeless man." There was a smirk in his eyes, but it never found his mouth.

"You've taken a depressing word and made it existential. Unfortunately fitting. How did you come to be brought before the Queen?"

Sjurd's eyes widened at that. "The Queen, you say? Like, an actual queen, or the figurehead sort? We had one of the latter. But she'd have popped up by now if she was still here."

“As true a queen as you can imagine.” She added a flourish of her feathered cape for effect. “And with that comes the expectation that my questions get answered.”

He gave a small, sheepish nod. “Right. I always fancied myself a bit of a leader, so when I regained consciousness--for the second time--in the middle of a field surrounded by hundreds of panicking people, well, I had to do something. Thankfully people tend to listen when the giant man bellows at them, and before I knew it I’d gotten everyone around me to shut up and stop trampling each other. Ended up leading that group in the vague direction of this here city, because where else were we gonna go?”

“And that’s how we found him,” Andres cut in. “Like a prophet leading his congregation.”

“But a prophet I’m not. Nor a politician, nor a logistician. So I handed the reigns off to the nice people in military jackets who seemed to have some fashion of an idea of what was going on. Not before getting noticed, apparently.”

“You did well.” She walked up and clapped a hand on his shoulder. “And you should be proud of what you did for your people. There’s some ethereal kinship between our people, as disparate as we might seem. And by that we will work tirelessly to right the wrong that has befallen you.”

Sjurd lifted his head and matched her gaze. “And you want us to return the favor, right? Your cities are intact, but you’ve lost all your knowledge of the world you live in.”

“Precisely. And while I loathe to ask more of you so quickly, it cannot be trusted to chance that we would meet here. Are you familiar with the ‘Copa Rushmori’?”

He let out a hoarse laugh. “Of course. Of course it actually comes back to football. Yes, I’m familiar with the Copa. Never played in it, despite having made it to the World Cup before, but always followed it. The, uh… the last thing I was doing before this all happened was a council meeting to see if Falcus could make a return to it. So you’ve got a squad ready?”

“As it were, we were preparing for our own Compianato Rushmori before ‘this all happened.’ I believe without a shadow of a doubt that these are somehow intertwined, and I’d be a fool to ignore it.” Reaching into her cape, Alyssiana pulled out card printed on heavy stock. “As a sign that our peoples are stuck in this world together, I’d like you to accompany our team to the Copa. Take the title of assistant manager, give them a speech about bravery in the face of adversity with the same story you’ve given me, whatever it is that sportspeople do when their time comes. Help us bring the tiniest bit of normalcy and hope into this insane world.”

He stared at the card in silence for a few moments. It was some sort of faux-ID, identifying the holder as an emissary of the Queen of the Skys and all the authority that commands among the Falkyr. With a dotted line that could carry his name. “...alright, you’ve got me.”

---

Alyssiana hadn’t taken her second step out of the barracks before she was flagged down, Sylvi stopping to catch her breath after apparently sprinting over from communications. “So you have news from Oddmund, then?”

“Well, yes,” the marshal managed, “they’ve found what look like major population centers on the eastern bay and the northern peninsula and contact has been made, so the evacuation should be starting soon. But the big news is from Aatos. In the southeast, there’s a foreign city with a military base in what used to be our land!”

That cocked the Queen’s brow. “Could they tell how well-equipped? And what flag is it flying? Someone did look it up online, right?”

“It’s equipped enough that it’d take a significant effort to assault, but seems to be much more concerned with its seaboard than the land border. We did look it up and it seems it was something of a joint effort between Falcus and the current owner, ‘Yur-ah’--”

“One of the regional superpowers, as I’ve heard.”

“Yes, which explains why they’d have this outpost a continent away from their homeland. It’s called ‘Helving.’ Aatos is keeping his distance to avoid provoking… any sort of response, really, but wanted your approval to stay stationed nearby to keep watch.”

“Very well. I can only hope that apparent tie to Falcus ingratiates the Eurans to help out. A war front is the absolute last thing we need right now, and I’m worried other parties might know that too.”

obv we already know they intend to help out but that'd happen at least a few hours later, and 'reaction to finding Helving' was something I wanted in the last RP that I didn't have time for >.>

[Taeshan]

A big matchday two matchup for the Purple Knights of Taeshan as they got to face one of the most familiar opponents possible for the side in Eura. The 17th meeting for the two sides and the Knights having never won in Eura or at home in Taeshan, have had more luck in neutral confines in the Copa Rushmori, and the one meeting in a World Cup Round of Sixteen. The Knights coming off a 1-0 victory in their first group stage matchup with Crystalline Caverns were hoping for a second strong defensive performance against a favored Eura squad, but would need a strong performance in the attacking front to assure their Round of Sixteen spot early.

The Knights would be able to get their 4th ever win against Eura, and scored their 6th ever goal against the twice World and twice Regional champions. It was another strong defensive performance, and the long held faith in defense got another 1-0 victory from the Purple Knights. It was more of a back and forth than the first match of the tournament with both side having their chances, but ultimately the first half ended 0-0. Miles Snavely made his first appearance of the tournament coming on at the half for Abriel Torres, and while he did some things it was ultimately not him that made the difference, but the introduction of Sahler Moon who found Wilhelm Nkitilina on a back post run who scored his first International goal in his second cap. Yoshimi Hirahito would come on for the goalscorer and the Knights pushed the victory past the finish line assuring themselves at least a spot in the next round.

[Queer Poco el Mono Ara]

Queer Poco el Mono Ara: Blurred Lines

Mercer gingerly edged out from underneath the desk and came face to face with the other version of himself. They were identical in height and weight, but where this Mercer was well presented the one from QPeMA 4482 was a little more unkempt. His grey hair was long and straggly and came down to his shoulders, his eyebrows were overgrown and clearly hadn’t been plucked for some time. His breath smelled of cigarettes and there was staining on his index and middle finger suggesting this Mercer smoked a hell of a lot. Stood side by side they looked like the adult versions of the prince and the pauper.

“What the hell is happening?” Mercer asked. He was still shaken but a little excited.

“You might want to sit down” Mercer 4482 suggested, pulling out the desk chair and gesturing. “It’s a little complicated.”

There was a pause as Mercer lowered himself onto his seat never looking away from the doppelganger.

“Are you aware of a country called Brigantii? Don’t answer just yet. Brigantii is very similar to Queer Poco el Mono Ara, same flag, same city names, just located elsewhere.”

“Where?”

“A continent called Wyrmgore.”

“Horrible name.”

“It’s just a name. Anyway Brigantii and the rest of Wyrmgore are inexplicably connected to Queer Poco el Mono Ara and beyond. There is a country in Wyrmgore - Pays de Horreur, that once belonged in Rushmore, it was a terrifying country populated by monsters, ghouls, freaks, you name it, it lived there, now it’s not even on the map of Rushmore. Same goes for the islands of Palacios and Rodallega, except they were just islands. Ang Grung was another island in Atlantian Oceania of dwarves now there’s no recollection of their ever being dwarves there except perhaps the place names?!” Mercer 4482 was beginning to speak quicker and shriller as he reeled off the bizarreness of Wyrmgore and the displacement of countries. “The nation of Cusco also contains place names exactly the same as Queer Poco el Mono Ara - Renato, Cruzeira, Minanda. But apparently now those cities no longer exist in Queer Poco after a protracted civil war. And don’t get me started on Al Ittijab. Al Ittijab, if you remember Pocoan ancient history was what Queer Poco el Mono Ara was called before the Spanish colonized the country BEFORE THEY LOST IT to the English. And before you say it must all be a coincidence believe me, it’s not.”

Mercer 4482 took a breath. “And the most bizarre part of this, none of this existed until the Pocoan civil war kicked off.”

“What has any of this got to do with Queer Poco el Mono Ara? You said there was something wrong with this version? What’s wrong?”

“It’s being pulled apart. Something in this reality is pulling Queer Poco el Mono Ara apart and morphing it beyond all recognition and whatever it is it’s having an affect on the surrounding area. If it continues Queer Poco el Mono Ara will completely cease to exist as you know it.”

“And what are we supposed to do about it?”

“Find what is responsible for this and eliminate it.”

“And what happens then?”

“Hopefully Queer Poco el Mono Ara returns to normal and won’t be entirely replaced by Brigantii.”

“Hopefully?”

The commotion inside Mercer’s office had drawn a small crowd who had huddled around the door listening in in a hushed silence. Gobsmacked and a little skeptical they squeezed closer together to try hear more of what was being said, a gaggle of professors, reception staff and students earwigging like nosy kids. It sounded preposterous, but that wasn’t the least of it.

“We need to find Frederico Luis Nazario de Lima. After his ill-advised jaunt around the Dreamed Realm what came back was less man and more demon. The presence of this demon is responsible for the state of current day Queer Poco el Mono Ara.”

“And how do you know that?”


“It’s what happened in my version of Queer Poco el Mono Ara.”

“Right… and how did you get to MY version of Queer Poco el Mono Ara?”

Oooh, this was bound to be good. The assembled crowd crept closer to the door to listen.

“That’s not important right now.” Responded Mercer 4482.

“Bullshit” blurted Professor Garcia outside the door. The microbiology professor suddenly realised what he’d done and looked around the collective with his eyes and mouth wide in shock.

“There’s somebody outside the door.” Mercer 4482 said heading across the room. The people gathered tried to scatter, setting off running each and every way down the corridor except for Garcia who was frozen in his crouched position by the door.

“Oh shit!” Exclaimed the duplicate Mercer as he saw a dozen people running from the office. “Well this isn’t good” he said turning back to the original Mercer who was still sat by his desk. Reaching into his ill-fitting suit he pulled out a weapon. It was a large gun, but rather than metallic it was perfectly, alabasterly white with a long muzzle. With a few squeezes of the trigger he fired off several rounds that froze the staff and students in their tracks, each one encased in a solid icy cocoon. “Give me a hand, put this lot in your office and lock the door.”

Mercer looked from between his entwined fingers. He’d covered his eyes the moment he saw the gun, abhorring any kind of violence. “What have you done?” he asked as Mercer 4482 dragged one of the frozen students into his office.

“They’re fine. It’s a temporary measure that prevents them from running round and causing a panic. When they defrost we’ll erase their memories.”

“What? How can you do any of this?”

“It’s just stuff we have in my version of Queer Poco el Mono Ara. Science here kinda stumbled during the civil war.”

Without speaking the two quickly and quietly dragged the frozen into Mercer’s office, squeezing them in where there was space before running out of room. There was one left, Garcia, who as frozen by the door in a crouched position.

“His office is just next door, we can put him in there.” They dragged Garcia towards his office and pushed the door. It didn’t budge.

“Are you pushing?” Mercer asked Mercer 4482.

“Yes”

“Are you sure?” they were beginning to sweat, lifting people encased in blocks of ice was heavy work.

“Yes. Are you sure it’s a push?” Mercer 4482 asked while trying to pull the door open. It didn’t move.

“Yes, Shit. He must have locked the door. I bet his keys are in his pocket.” The two looked at the frozen prof. Crouched timidly, his hands up in a defensive position near his face.

“Shit.”

“Put him in the janitor’s cupboard. The cleaner shouldn’t be here for hours.”

----

Whites Nab Vital Point

In the second fixture of Queer Poco el Mono Ara’s return to international football the Whites managed to take a valuable point and narrowly keep alive hopes of a second round fixture. After the disappointing dismantling at the hands of the reigning champions QPeMA needed to bounce back.

The match however didn’t get off to the positive start needed as Queer Poco found themselves down by one after only quarter of an hour. Aurora Solignac opened the scoring with a long range thunderbolt, playing a neat one two with Etxeita, the Fevelo Colony winger cut inside onto her right before curling into the top corner of Moore’s goal, well out of the reach of the Batil Toads goalie. An equalizer followed shortly as speculative Villanueva effort was tipped over the bar for a corner. An in swinger from Milburn was met by Devlin who flicked the ball on at the near post and beyond the Askari keeper.

In the second half both teams peppered the opposition goal with efforts, but neither could muster one on target. It took until the 70th minute and some miscommunication in the Pocoan defence to allow Aurtenetxe in on goal, with neither Urena or Devlin picking her up she found space in the box for an Etxeita pass. With no defenders around Moore rushed out and took the striker down when lunging for the ball. A straight red card and the keeper will miss QPeMA’s final group game and conceded a second penalty in as many fixtures. The Nepharim 3rd division based attacker took the resulting penalty - and - after bringing on Ern Janson for Gary Rhodes, smashed it straight down the middle as Janson dove to his left.

2-1 and it looked like Queer Poco were headed for a second loss and elimination. But a mad dash from Bill Tinker up the left flank so the defender in unfamiliar territory. Looking up he picked out Velazquez, now the lone striker, who took the ball on his chest. With his back to goal he flicked up the ball with his knee and and with a magnificent bicycle kick volleyed the ball past Caragin to rescue a much needed point.

The final game for Queer Poco el Mono Ara is against Eastfield Lodge and will be played at Mastad Lillina - home to KF Lilnim. The match day 3 fixture is a must win for the returning Whites who, through a number of permutations still have the chance to play in the next round but will need to pick up 3 points against the second best ranked side in the group.

[Darmen]

Abascal's seat gets hotter!
All Green's in must win situation

Darmen 3–3 Oberour Ar Moro
OAM: Unknown
DAR: Campo - Virgo, Abbey, Maddox (Spalding 81') - Goldschmidt - Ó Cuilinn (Mac Pharlain 63'), Winton, Byrnes, Stafford (Freud 67') - Hurst, Blackwood

GOALS         D-O
 7' Unknown   0-1
18' Hurst     1-1
25' Unknown   1-2
36' Byrnes    2-2
51' Unknown   2-3
75' Blackwood 3-3

Nephara 5–2 Darmen
NPH: Swoboda - Close, Steelhenge, Thorn (Brosch 72'), Kielseng - Rowland - Moxham (Kuepper 65'), Klein - Strongbow (Deventer 72'), Fanaiyan - Hawke
DAR: Campo - Virgo, Abbey, Maddox - Goldschmidt - Ó Cuilinn, Winton (Cardoso 68'), Byrnes (McNeil 68'), Stafford - Hurst (Firmin 76'), Blackwood

GOALS          N-D
 3' Hawke      1-0
11' Moxham     2-0
17' Blackwood  2-1
36' Hawke      3-1
57' Strongbow  4-1
62' Steelhenge 5-1
83' Firmin     5-2

Darmen's start to the Copa Rushmori has not gone well and Godefroy Abascal is feeling the heat. In fact, the campaign thus far has been a carbon copy of the previous campaign, with the exception of the order of the fixtures. Darmen has drawn with Oberour Ar Moro and lost to Nephara, albeit with different scorelines, but nonetheless enters the final matchday with only a single point and the absolute necessity to win the final match. Darmen must also hope that Nephara emerges with at least a point from its encounter with Oberour Ar Moro; a Cormorants defeat would doom the All Greens to an early exit.

That must win match for Darmen will be against Saintland, who are re-entering the international football scene after some time away. The Sanctii's super-ultra-mega-catenaccio style of play may pose a challenge to Darmen, but so far three goals have been scored against Saintland. Darmen may have to abandon its wing play and take a more central route should the Sanctii back six hamper Darmen's efforts inside the 18. Set pieces will also be key.

Not only is advancement to the Round of Sixteen at stake, but the continued employment of Manager Godefroy Abascal is too. His last victory came six months ago when Darmen hosted Cobrio in a World Cup qualifier and won 7-2. At this point, anything short of a Quarterfinal appearance for the All Greens would likely mean Abascal's sacking, but as of yet, no names have been floated as a possible replacement.

[Eura]

Michael Brandon's first match as Eura manager had gone very well indeed. The enigmatic Falkyr side that would provide his first test as Eura boss had fought hard given their domestic circumstances but his team were more than up to the challenge. Imriška Grahn and Irene Andréasson had tested his side on the counter, frequently testing the new centreback pairing of Charles Roberts and Harvey Blake. Both young men stood up to the challenge well. Brandon needed them to perform yet his eyes couldn't help but wander towards John Talbot in the middle. He was traditionally an anchorman. The Nepharim coach now had something different in mind for the lad; turning the Spartangrad stalwart into a more rounded central midfielder who could press forward when needed and playing a higher line. It would be a tough ask for a player on the wrong side of thirty but Brandon rated him highly, and he was rewarded for his faith late in the first half. Talbot surged past Tatiana Tennfjord, deftly pinged a pass into the left channel for Griffiths, and watched with delight as the Revolutionaries attacker swung the ball across for Underwood to tuck it home. Easy enough.

The second half was more challenging as Falkyr attacked with more intent, having brought on David Isaksson for the centreback Greta Nurmi to bolster the midfield. Grahn had her best chance at this point, strutting into the box and casting aside her marker Ben Hall before shooting low and into the left hand corner. Luckily for Eura their best defender Scott Coles was on hand to deflect the ball narrowly wide when Griffin was beaten. Frustration grew for Eura's opponents as the more experienced side tightened up and eventually the Eurans killed the game off. Tom Riley wisely advised his boss to pull off a tiring Liam Armstrong for Harry Gravesen who had an immediate impact alongside his club teammate Talbot. He dispossessed Isaksson with a crushing tackle in the centre circle allowing the ball to run loose for Talbot, who lofted it high and far to the right side. Anthony Townsend was on to it and for a moment it looked like Eura would score a goal similar to their first but on the right side. Instead Underwood uncharacteristically flapped at the cross. Griffiths appeared at the far post to spare his blushes, driving hard and high into the roof of the net. Grahn got a goal not long after, creating a nervy finish, but Eura saw it out.

Fast forward to the next group game and Brandon’s cause for celebration had evaporated. Taeshan were a side Eura had beaten time and time again – but not today. Underwood had been injured early on and much to his managers surprise and anguish, Dean Sharp had been woeful in front of goal against the usual defensive Taeshani set up. Everything seemed to be going against Eura. Each loose ball found its way to Taeshani feet. Bookings began to sprout up from careless tackles. In time Eura paid dearly for their profligate finishing as they went behind. Fury turned to panic and it began to dawn on Brandon that the mentality trap of the present day Euran side was not a figment of media narrative. Hopeless, desperate balls were pumped into the area in very un-Euran fashion. Brian Bond came on to mix things up and finally the moment for a vital equaliser came. Bond jinked one way, then another, pass across the goalkeeper to Coltrane – and he missed. Oscar Coltrane, the ever reliable attacking focal point, clipped his shot wide and could only hold his head in his hands as the final whistle blew. Brandon walked down the tunnel and Riley hurriedly followed. There was a lot of work left to do.

[Mareibat]

MAREIBAT COPA RUSHMORI 32 ROSTER

Manager: Roy Tobin, Aged: 53
Assistant Manager: Ezekial Charlestown, Aged 43
Style: +0.75

Spiel: The Mareibat national side continues to muddle along, competing in tournaments without really doing anything of note. Brian Ashgrove, the long standing manager, stepped down after the last Copa and Roy Tobin, who has ANL managerial experience has taken over, with former star striker Ezekiel Charlestown remaining the team's assistant. There have been a number of retirements and older players dropping from the team, so the squad has a slightly different feel to it this time around. Admiral Falcon, an ANL winner with Barbury Town has finally usurped Thorgen Lillehammer between the sticks, while Louis Myers, Ashqar Barthelemy, Ebrahim Truman, Benita Hicks, Maurice Kashani and most excitingly Mubaaraka Durtch of Skibbereen United in Apox (although probably not for much longer) all receive call-ups to the team for the first time. While the team aren't really expected to do much this tournament, a good showing against vastly better and more experienced opposition would be good.

Goalkeepers
Name                Age  Club
Admiral Falcon       25   Barbury Town 
Louis Myers          29   Oldem Mechanical
Thorgen Lillehammer  33   Halholzer United

Defenders
Name                Position Age  Club
Umbar Richards         RD     26   Harmonica Tundra
Torin Johnstone        RD     30   Halholzer United
Ambrósio Constantini   CD     33   Coret Hawks
Ernestine Atkins       CD     25   Halholzer United
Joachim Elden          CD     30   Sabrefell Moths
Ashqar Barthelemy      CD     24   Azewyn Royals
Hilda O’Hardlome       LD     30   Calshott Lighthouse
Ebrahim Truman         LD     28   Harmonica Tundra

Midfielders
Name                Position Age  Club
Richard Sherman        RM     27   Appleoosa HC
Caspian Pike           RM     23   Halholzer United
Aristotle Weaver       CM     24   Holdenberg
Geena Opendale        CAM     26      FC Tinhampton
Jack Grinish           CM     33   Halholzer United
Benita Hicks           DM     29   Mulhampstead
Imriel Armoray         LM     27   Issington F.C
Maurice Kashani        LM     28   Harmonica Tundra  

Strikers
Name                Position Age  Club
Yorin Voeller          ST     30   Halholzer United
Richard Armada         ST     30   Olympique de Fontvielle
Studio Marquis         ST     26   Bellight FC
Mubaaraka Durtch       ST     23   Skibbereen United

Formation


RP Permissions:
No deaths, no career ending injuries. Otherwise, go nuts!

[Qusmo]

SPONY LUQ TELEVISION

Copa Rushmori XXXII is about to end for eight teams, but the drama is just starting to ramp up. No team has been eliminated yet, but all six current group leaders are through to the octofinals - & only six are through, leaving ten spots up for grabs between eighteen teams. Even for the six teams which have advanced, however, the final matchday of the group stage is meaningful, as finishing as group winners would earn a much friendlier knockout bracket than finishing lower down the table - & going beyond winning the group to being one of the best first-place sides would do even more favours for the knockout fixtures. So, everyone is asking themselves the same set of questions: Will their team make it to the octofinals? How can they set themselves up for success while they’re there? & how far can they go? With that, let’s get to our first question, from a viewer in Qanz, Qusmo.

I’m planning on going to the Qusmo-Olastor match; what’s at stake there?

This match will be important to both teams - but it probably won’t determine whether or not they’ll make it to the octofinals. Olastor is already through, & Qusmo is nearly there, too. For Qusmo to slip to third in the group, they would need to lose to Olastor, & Schottia would need to lose to Pridnestrovia, marking an ignominious debut to the Copa Rushmori for the two-time Independents Cup champions. Qusmo & Pridnestrovia would then be tied on points & all head-to-head tiebreakers, owing to their draw. So, it’s possible that, even if Qusmo loses & Pridnestrovia wins, Qusmo will still finish in the top two of Ekwadup Qusma.

Still, let’s say they don’t. If Qusmo loses & finishes in third in Ekwadup Qusma, where does that leave it: in the knockouts or out? Well, unfortunately for Qusmo, it is possible that the third-place team of every group finishes with at least four points. Fortunately, however, not all of these scenarios are likely. Let’s run the numbers.

• Ekwadup Qusma’s third-place team will have four points if Pridnestrovia defeats Schottia.
• Ekwadup Vaspola’s third-place team will have four points if Oberour Ar Moro defeats Nephara.
• Ekwadup Tumata’s third-place team will have four points if Cassadaigua defeats Tcherec.
• Ekwadup Serana’s third-place team will have at least four points if Eura & Falkyr both earn results against Crystalline Caverns & Taeshan, respectively; Ekwadup Serana’s third-place team will have six points if Eura & Falkyr both win against Crystalline Caverns & Taeshan, respectively.
• Ekwadup Fedala’s third-place team will have four points if Queer Poco el Mono Ara defeats Eastfield Lodge.
• Ekwadup Refora’s third-place team will have four points if Valladares & Mareibat draw.

A few possibilities jump out as more potentially likely than others. Each Copa brings with it many surprises, but Nephara is a constant - & a dominant one, at that. Oberour Ar Moro certainly isn’t a bad team, but all the same, it is not likely that Nephara will drop points to them on the final matchday, much less lose outright, when it could jeopardize their standing in the bracket so much. If that is the case, Qusmo would need only one of the other scenarios not to happen in order to be guaranteed a place in the octofinals.

Even if all of them do happen, it’s worth taking a closer look at that last one. If Valladares & Mareibat draw, they’d both be on four points, with Mareibat taking second with a goal differential of ±0 & Valladares taking third with a goal differential of -1. Qusmo has an advantage in that it currently has a goal differential of +2; as long as it doesn’t lose by more than two, it won’t fall behind Valladares in the third-place table, likely guaranteeing it a spot in the octofinals.

Of course, Olastor has already guaranteed it will go through as one of the top two in Ekwadup Qusma, but it still has something to play for. If Olastor earns a result, it will win the group - & claim a group winners spot in the bracket. Further, if it can win against Qusmo - or, even better, win big - it will position itself well for seeding in the group winners table, which has the possibility to feature six teams on a perfect nine points each. Olastor - or any group winner - will be eager to do that, as finishing in the top four on that table will secure an opponent which finished third in their group, while finishing in the top two on that table will ensure they won’t have to face another group winner until at least the semifinals.

Meanwhile, Qusmo doesn’t just have to hope it won’t take a big loss. Alongside Taeshan, Qusmo is one of two teams to have kept clean sheets in both of their first two matches this tournament. In fact, Qusmo has not conceded a goal in a Copa Rushmori since their very first edition; they have a clean sheet streak in this tournament of six matches, stretching five hundred seventy minutes. If they keep that clean sheet streak going, they will secure at least a draw; this will be enough to see them take second place, no matter what else happens in the group, & see them through to the knockouts.

In fact, Qusmo might be dreaming of a victory to close out the group stage. If they do, they’ll again have a draw sandwiched by two victories - just like their last Copa Rushmori group stage. &, just like that Copa, it will mean they will have won their group. Qusmo would be unlikely to be in the top four of the group winners table, not to mention the top two, but just getting themselves a position on that table would be rewarding. Even the group winner with the least impressive resume will be able to play a low-performing second-place side, before perhaps a tougher quarterfinal round against a team which may have won its own group. Still, that is still a friendlier bracket than what Qusmo would have to face if they finish second in their group. That brings us to our next question, from another viewer in Qanz, Qusmo.

If I were one of the organizers of the tournament - which I’m not, of course - would I have to worry about any three-way tiebreaker headaches heading into the last matchday? (By the way, this is anonymous, right?)

Heading into the final matchday of the group stage, there is a possibility of a three-way tie. It’s in Ekwadup Serana, & it could happen if Falkyr defeats Taeshan & Eura defeats Crystalline Caverns. In terms of probability, it seems likely that a regional juggernaut will be able to put away one of the three teams in the tournament which have yet to score any goals thus far. The unranked team representing Falkyr, a nation now undergoing tremendous crisis, might be underdogs against one of the two teams still with a perfect defensive record; however, if they can manage to do it, things might get interesting.

If Taeshan, Eura, & Falkyr all end on six points, the first tiebreaker will be head-to-head points. They would still be tied at that point, as all three teams would have wins over Crystalline Caverns. Next would be head-to-head goal difference. Eura’s would be locked in at ±0, with a 2-1 win over Falkyr & a 0-1 loss to Taeshan. Meanwhile, in this scenario, Falkyr’s head-to-head goal difference would be at least that, or higher with a win of at least two goals over Taeshan, while Taeshan’s head-to-head goal difference would be at most that, or lower with a loss of at least two goals to Falkyr. So, if Falkyr can defeat Taeshan by at least two goals, they will win Ekwadup Serana. In that scenario, Eura would just need a win on Matchday Three to take second in the group, bumping Taeshan down to third.

But what if Falkyr defeats Taeshan by one goal? In that case, the three teams would be tied on points, with six, head-to-head points, with three, head-to-head goal difference, with zero, & head-to-head wins, with one. Then, it would be kicked down to the fourth tiebreaker: head-to-head goals scored. Again, Eura’s figure is already set, with two goals scored against Falkyr & Taeshan. Both of those teams have scored one goal against Eura, so they would need one goal to tie Eura & two goals to surpass Eura on the final matchday.

In this scenario, Falkyr wins its match against Taeshan by one, so Falkyr would have at least two head-to-head goals; at the very least, they would tie Eura here. Falkyr could also surpass Eura by scoring at least two goals, which would see Taeshan tie Eura, & Taeshan could surpass Eura if the scoreline is three-two or even higher-scoring. With a one-goal Falkyr win seeing at least five goals scored, Falkyr would win the group, with Taeshan placing second, & Eura advancing as the top third-place side in the tournament.

However, it is more likely that the match would end one-nil, & if it does, the recalculation clause would come into play, with the tiebreakers resetting to separate Eura & Falkyr after Taeshan loses the fourth three-way tiebreaker. The first tiebreaker is head-to-head results, & Eura defeated Falkyr. So, if Eura wins & Falkyr wins one-nil, Eura will win Ekwadup Serana, Falkyr will place second, & Taeshan will take third. Meanwhile, if the score reads Falkyr 2-1 Taeshan, it will be Falkyr winning the group, with Taeshan & Eura fighting it out for second, & with Taeshan’s head-to-head victory on Matchday Two, it will be Taeshan taking second & Eura third.

However, that’s not the only possible three-way tie that exists. In fact, the other also can be found in the same group: Ekwadup Serana. If, instead of winning, Eura & Falkyr both lose, Taeshan would be the runaway group winners on a perfect nine points, but Eura, Falkyr, & Crystalline Caverns would be locked on three points each. In this case, again, the teams would be deadlocked with three head-to-head points, sending us to the second tiebreaker: head-to-head goal difference.

This time, it would be Falkyr’s goal difference that is the benchmark, locked at ±0. Eura could have a head-to-head goal difference of at most that, while that is the minimum head-to-head goal difference Crystalline Caverns could have. If Taeshan defeats Falkyr & Crystalline Caverns downs Eura by at least two goals, Crystalline Caverns would take second in the group, Falkyr would be third, & Eura would finish bottom.

However, it again gets tricky if there is a one-goal margin, this time in the other Matchday Three match in this group. If Crystalline Caverns defeats Eura by exactly one goal, all three teams will be tied on head-to-head goal difference, too. They will be tied on wins, also, leading them to head-to-head goals scored. Here, Eura has the advantage. Falkyr is locked in at two head-to-head goals, but Eura already has reached that mark - & has one more match left in which to add to that tally. Meanwhile, Crystalline Caverns is starting from zero.

In this scenario, Crystalline Caverns would defeat Eura by exactly one goal - so they would remain behind Eura by one head-to-head goal. Even if the final score were to be one-nil, Crystalline Caverns would lose the tiebreaker, & the tie would be between Eura & Falkyr - & Eura would win that tiebreaker. So, if Taeshan defeats Falkyr, Eura would be guaranteed second place & advancement to the Octofinals if it can prevent a multigoal loss to Crystalline Caverns.

But the precise number of goals scored would matter to Falkyr & Crystalline Caverns in the battle for third. Because Falkyr has the two-way head-to-head tiebreaker over Crystalline Caverns, Crystalline Caverns would need to win by a three-two margin, or win with a result featuring even more goals, or win by an even greater margin, in order to climb out of the bottom & into the top three.

Unlike the first three-way tie scenario, however, it is less likely that this scenario would allow the third-place team in the group to advance. If Eura, Falkyr, & Taeshan tie on six points, the third-place team in the group would be guaranteed advancement, because no other third-place team in the tournament would be on more than four points. However, if the tie is between Eura, Falkyr, & Crystalline Caverns at three points, it is very possible the third-place team in the group loses out, since all other groups could see their third-place teams sitting on four points - & even if there is one or two spots open to a third-place team with three points, the negative goal difference that Ekwadup Serana’s third-place team would be guaranteed to have in this scenario may not be enough to see them through.

Ekwadup Qusma
Schottia 0–1 Olastor
Qusmo 0–0 Pridnestrovia

  Ekwadup Qusma          Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Olastor                  2   2  0  0    4   2  +2    6
2 Qusmo                    2   1  1  0    2   0  +2    4
3 Pridnestrovia            2   0  1  1    2   3  −1    1
4 Schottia                 2   0  0  2    0   3  −3    0

Qusmo struggles to score against Pridnestrovia but still has decent position
Qusmo 0–0 Pridnestrovia
Mastad Qastyra, Qanz, Qusmo (cap. 72 000)

---

GK  Xynat-Evela Cuf
CB  Cunix-Betva Tla
CB  Yelto-Alfan Ono
CB  Zenon-Gerol Kal
DM  Jerat-Jonto Jan
CM  Ilinx-Kepex Zev
AM  Gavax-Nenzi Abe
83’ Prant-Pertz Gor
LM  Helek-Nenzi Ono
72’ Ozolx-Mazur Guv
RM  Forzu-Ralox Kal
72’ Jralv-Nexev Pec
SS  Paliv-Xilit Max
ST  Xilit-Zaxac Yol

[Qusmo]

& if Maggie don't love you now, She will never love you again. I can still hear you saying you would never miss the octos.

Ekwadup Qusma
Pridnestrovia 1–2 Schottia
Olastor 1–1 Qusmo

  Ekwadup Qusma          Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Olastor                  3   2  1  0    5   3  +2    7
2 Qusmo                    3   1  2  0    3   1  +2    5
3 Schottia                 3   1  0  2    2   4  −2    3
4 Pridnestrovia            3   0  1  2    3   5  −2    1

Ekwadup Vaspola
Darmen 0–1 Saintland
Oberour Ar Moro 2–1 Nephara

  Ekwadup Vaspola        Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Nephara                  3   2  0  1    8   4  +4    6
2 Saintland                3   2  0  1    4   3  +1    6
3 Oberour Ar Moro          3   1  1  1    6   7  −1    4
4 Darmen                   3   0  1  2    5   9  −4    1

Ekwadup Tumata
Cassadaigua 2–1 Tcherec
Mytanija 2–4 Sargossa

  Ekwadup Tumata         Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Sargossa                 3   3  0  0   13   5  +8    9
2 Mytanija                 3   1  1  1    6   5  +1    4
3 Cassadaigua              3   1  1  1    6   6   0    4
4 Tcherec                  3   0  0  3    1  10  −9    0

Ekwadup Serana
Taeshan 1–0 Falkyr
Crystalline Caverns 0–0 Eura

  Ekwadup Serana         Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Taeshan                  3   3  0  0    3   0  +3    9
2 Eura                     3   1  1  1    2   2   0    4
3 Falkyr                   3   1  0  2    2   3  −1    3
4 Crystalline Caverns      3   0  1  2    0   2  −2    1

Ekwadup Fedala
Eastfield Lodge 2–1 Queer Poco el Mono Ara
The Askari Union 2–2 Savojarna

  Ekwadup Fedala         Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Savojarna                3   2  1  0    9   5  +4    7
2 The Askari Union         3   1  2  0    6   4  +2    5
3 Eastfield Lodge          3   1  0  2    3   6  −3    3
4 Queer Poco el Mono Ara   3   0  1  2    5   8  −3    1

Ekwadup Refora
Pasarga 3–2 Bernegastad
Mareibat 2–5 Valladares

  Ekwadup Refora         Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Pasarga                  3   3  0  0    9   3  +6    9
2 Valladares               3   2  0  1    8   6  +2    6
3 Mareibat                 3   1  0  2    6   9  −3    3
4 Bernegastad              3   0  0  3    4   9  −5    0

  Group Winners          Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Sargossa                 3   3  0  0   13   5  +8    9
2 Pasarga                  3   3  0  0    9   3  +6    9
3 Taeshan                  3   3  0  0    3   0  +3    9
4 Savojarna                3   2  1  0    9   5  +4    7
5 Olastor                  3   2  1  0    5   3  +2    7
6 Nephara                  3   2  0  1    8   4  +4    6

  Group Runners-Up       Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts   Half
1 Valladares               3   2  0  1    8   6  +2    6   Left
2 Saintland                3   2  0  1    4   3  +1    6   Left
3 The Askari Union         3   1  2  0    6   4  +2    5   Right
4 Qusmo                    3   1  2  0    3   1  +2    5   Right
5 Mytanija                 3   1  1  1    6   5  +1    4   Right
6 Eura                     3   1  1  1    2   2   0    4   Left

  Group Third Places     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts   Qtrs.
3 Cassadaigua              3   1  1  1    6   6   0    4   BL & TR
3 Oberour Ar Moro          3   1  1  1    6   7  −1    4   BL & TR
3 Falkyr                   3   1  0  2    2   3  −1    3   TL & TR
3 Schottia                 3   1  0  2    2   4  −2    3   TL & BR
3 Mareibat                 3   1  0  2    6   9  −3    3
3 Eastfield Lodge          3   1  0  2    3   6  −3    3

Octofinal Schedule
Octofinal I: Sargossa v. Falkyr
Octofinal II: Valladares v. Saintland
Octofinal III: Savojarna v. Cassadaigua
Octofinal IV: Olastor v. Eura
Octofinal V: Pasarga v. Oberour Ar Moro
Octofinal VI: The Askari Union v. Qusmo
Octofinal VII: Taeshan v. Schottia
Octofinal VIII: Nephara v. Mytanija

[Nephara]

Nephara 2 - 0 Saintland
(4-4-2) 1 - Swoboda; 2 - Rafford, 5 - Thorn, 6 - Steelhenge, 3 - Close (19 - Rouphos 76'); 13 - Saroszi, 15 - Rosenthal, 4 - Rowland (c, 23 - Shone 65'), 11 - Strongbow (3c); 9 - Hawke (vc, Bastable 76'), 10 - Metzger
Goals: Rafford 24', Saroszi 43'

Nephara 5 - 2 Darmen
(4-3-3) 1 - Swoboda; 18 - Kielseng, 5 - Thorn (22 - Brosch 72'), 6 - Steelhenge, 3 - Close; 8 - Klein, 4 - Rowland (c), 21 - Moxham (14 - Kuepper 65'); 7 - Fanaiyan, 9 - Hawke, 11 - Strongbow (16 - Deventer 72')
Goals: Hawke 3' 36', Moxham 11', Strongbow 57', Steelhenge 62'

Oberour ar Moro 2 - 1 Nephara
(4-3-3) 1 - Swoboda; 18 - Kielseng (2 - Rafford 83'), 5 - Thorn, 22 - Brosch, 3 - Close; 14 - Kuepper, 23 - Shone, 8 - Klein (c); 7 - Fanaiyan, 10 - Metzger (17 - Bastable 67'), 16 - Deventer
Goal: Klein 47'

Some national team camps were happy places. Aidan Brosque's Nephara seethed. The Sword of Damocles hung heavy overhead, and defeat meant things were strained.
It wasn't just that, either. Saintland had been fun, as always, but the chaos lurking under the surface was exemplified by the captain's armband changing hands twice. Monica Rowland admitted to the press she had no idea what the Strongnesse Trophy was beforehand, as it was obligingly wheeled out by Nepharim officials to perch on the sidelines throughout the game, or even that Saintland and Nephara were rivals at all; there was a certain bloodlessness to her that people just didn't take to. There were some cheers from the crowd when Tawny Shone came on just after the hour; they knew the young scrapper from Sabrefell was out to knock some heads together, and she duly obliged, with a rakish grin assuring the referee all was well with every shin-hack and swing of the elbow.
Rowland and Shone were both similar players, in practice. Shone was an accurate and confident passer of the ball, Rowland had an understated physicality to her defensive work. Just, one of them took 'thug' as a compliment, the other as an insult.
Rowland had overseen victory over Darmen, a thrilling attacking performance that really threw the shackles off, but then instead of keeping that momentum going, Brosque switched up the squad against Oberour, hoping to rest a few key players; Rowland included. Rusalka Klein took the armband, the fourth player to wear it in three games, and lead by example with a goal; Oberour struck back with two. Nephara had gone from the strongest group leader to the weakest. At least it wasn't another group stage exit, but nobody was happy, Rowland least of all.

Tawny Shone had an issue. She cracked her knuckles, rolled her neck, ground her teeth...
Eloise Kielseng, quietly solidifying herself as a stable dressing-room presence, liked to be peoples' shoulder to cry on. "Look. Tawny. It's mountains from molehills, here. Sure, Monica can be kind of a prick, but it's who she is."
Morena Deventer laughed at that, because she was the kind to laugh at anything.
Shone clicked her tongue. "Yeah, it just gives me the shits. You know why she does it."
"Yeah. She does it because she wants people to get better. She wants to win, Tawny, don't we all?"
"It's not-- I'm not talking about that. Christ, I know I'm not the perfect player, I know my fucking limits, Kiels. But she picks at me. There's a difference between the way she guides the others and the way she picks at me. Tells me to do my talking on the pitch, and so on."
Deventer laughed again. "It's different 'cause it's you, Tawny. And you are a mouthy cunt."
"Hey? Rena?"
"Yeah?"
"Shut the fuck up."
For all the heartwarming reassurance of her teammates, Shone never did quite shake the feeling that Rowland had it in for her. Mostly, this was because she was right.

Of all things, the breaking point came during a rondo.
People worried when Shone was in the middle of a rondo. She found it hard to turn the white-line fever off, avoid going for the shins. Morena Deventer being dragged bodily to the ground was something of a rite of passage passed for her. Most of the Cormorants laughed; Rowland clicked her tongue.
People worried with Rowland was in the middle of a rondo, too. Mostly because she was a leggy cunt who you could never feel safe around, which was exactly why she was so good at her job. Not Shone, though; she was fearless in possession, it was one of her understated gifts. And when Deventer passed it her way, with another shitty grin on her face, and Rowland coming in with menace.
Shone took the ball, seemed to dither - just for a moment, just long enough to draw Rowland in - and at the very moment where Rowland stretched out her left leg with the right standing, Shone dragged the ball between her feet.
The squad gave the ancient and time-honoured response, which was a collective sound more or less similar to "Wheyyyyy."
Not that it was the right call; the ball was slow and aimless, beyond the impact of annoying Rowland, and behind her, Close simply intercepted it. Still, Shone grinned.
Rowland stood back, hands on her hips. "You lost possession," she said blandly.
"Uh-huh. But I beat you, at least."
"It's not about me, it's about-"
"Yeah, yeah, trite as ever."
"Easy, Tawny." Circe Rosenthal put a heavy hand on her shoulder, and glanced a warning at Rowland. "I think we're all a little heated, after the-"
"No, I think Tawny's heated," said Rowland, evenly. "I'm perfectly calm. Perhaps our backup defensive midfielder could use an early shower-"
"Easy," repeated Rosenthal, starting to interpose herself, as others started to move in, picking their sides - most gravitating behind Shone, both of them noticing it.
"Holy shit." Shone shook her head. "Monica Rowland, the model professional, squaring up to fight."
"Damn right, I'm a professional."
Rosenthal was between them, now. The coaches were starting to flood in, and hands grasped at both shoulders in a way that didn't quite want to break up the fight before it got started.
"Better a professional than a street rat-"
"Street rat!"
"- yeah, fuck off back to your asphalt in Sabrefell, Christ knows that's all you ever talk about, all there is to you-"
"Yeah?"
"Yeah-"
"But you know what, Monica, I'm here 'cause I bleed green. You're a stuck-up Euran bitch who doesn't give a fuck about anything but her career-"
Well, Shone could be impressed about one thing, at least, when she woke up a couple hours later. Rowland could throw a hell of a punch.

[Taeshan]

The third matchday was just for the group win and placements in the Round of Sixteen for the Purple Knights as they faced off against Falkyr. With the side already advanced, but playing for a strong finish the usual 11 was on the field, and they played against a side they were slightly favored against. That said it was another game where the Purple Knights were rather even with their opponents and it was really easy to tell that the rather young starters continue to have some growing pains. The new trio of Nkitilina, Santiago, and Morgenstern did not have the greatest outing which eventually lead to some halftime subs with the game tied 0-0. Nkitilina would make way for Miles Snavely, with Santiago being pushed out for Victor Borja who earned his first international cap. Borja, also rather young proved rather erratic for the rest of the game, though with the advancement assured and a tie good enough to win the group it seemed a positive move for the side.

The third sub would be the game-changing sub with Abriel Torres making way for a rather interesting substitute in Elaine Mathieu. The side switched to a more 4-3-3 like formation with Mathieu and Morgenstern on the wings, with Snavely bossing the opposition box. Eventually this would lead to the game winner as Randall Abl Bakr pushed a streaking Mathieu down the field who whipped in a cross that Snavely banged into the goal for his 126th international goal. The Knights would get all three points on the night, and win the group, finishing third overall in total standings after the group stage. This sets up an intriguing Round of Sixteen matchup with Schottia. The two sides have never faced each other before, but a few Schottians have played in Taeshan and recently both Nycolas Jackson and Yoshimi Hirahito made loan deals to Schottia to play, meaning this game could be interesting on all sides. The Knights would likely be favored in this matchup on recent form, and regional ranking, but the Schottia National Team won the 79th World Cup, and is recently back on an upswing.

[Schottia]

---

SBCNEWS Online...
Football special - Copa Rushmori

---

After a bruising and baffling campaign, where Schottia scraped qualification by a single goal, it seems like as good a point as any to take stock. Take stock of what, exactly? That’s a question most fans and pundits will be asking themselves after defeats to Olastor, and hosts Qusmo, left the WC79 winners requiring a narrow victory over Pridnestrovia to limp over the line.

We saw rows and disagreement spill over, as well as players refusing to be substituted, as a once proud footballing nation appeared to lose the plot. The Schottic rumour mill has been in full swing of course, but assistant manager Eoin Killanen’s absence from the bench during the third match at least hints to the fact that something went wrong. There will be time for a full diagnoses once the dust has settled, but for now we will have to be content with piecing together what we can.

---

Qusmo 2–0 Schottia @ Mastad Qusma
Line-up: Lorrey, Hordern, McGillivray, Ünterhausen, Carlin, Conjure, Stenberg (Bánach), Soria Luna (Bronte), Cnocstanger, Avelione, Martel Burns

---

It was supposed to be the Auks triumphant return, as they marched out against the host nation in the opening match of Copa Rushmori XXXII, with many curious eyes keeping a carful watch on this most interesting of curtain raisers. It wasn’t exactly the Schottia team of five years ago, but with the likes of Conjure, Martel-Burns and Avelione in their ranks, fans would have been confident of a good showing. Unfortunately, after only a few minutes, it seemed as though that confidence had been misplaced. Against a side, in the form of Qusmo, Schottia found opponents who were fresh from the fight, coming in on the back of World Cup qualification, and playing in front of their home crowd.

Schottia, by contrast, looked tiered, jaded, and every bit a team who hadn’t played together for half a decade. Interim manager Jock Sonny wasn’t the SFA’s first choice, and his hastily mished together backroom staff had clearly been unable to bring the team up to pace quickly enough. Avarn-Oxolt Ban players gave Schottia the run around for much of the game, and despite the introduction of Dilon Bánach and Maeve Bronte at half time, there was little the side could do to get a foothold. As the game wore on, frustration was setting in, at the 0-0 score line clearly flattered the visitors. Jack Avelione scooped a decent effort into the arms of Xynat-Evela Cuf, and Evelyn Conjure blazed over the kind of free kick she would normally tuck away for Brinemouth, as Schottia looked very unlikely to score. It was as Sonny looked to rectify this, with ten minutes left on the clock, the madness truly descended.

With Ross Renshaw poised to come on for Martel-Burns, the Directus striker chose to ignore these orders, resulting in several minutes of excruciating embarrassment Jock Sonny and his staff. Eoin Killanen was seen kicking a water bottle, before heading up the tunnel as tempers flared over. Schottia lost the plot after this point, with Ilinx-Kepex Zev and Xilit-Zaxac Yol taking advantage to give the hosts a thoroughly deserved win.

---

Olastor 1–0 Schottia @ Mastad Qanza
Line-up: Lorrey, Corrello, McGillivray, Ünterhausen, Campbell, Conjure (Cnocstanger), Avelione (Stenberg), Bronte, Bánach, Jevđenijević, Renshaw (James)

---

It was all-change for the game with Olastor, as Sonny made six alterations to the side which so badly capitulated against Qusmo. Martel-Burns was absent from the matchday squad altogether, with Renshaw starting in a more conventional front two alongside Jack Jevđenijević. Conjure moved to the right wing, as Bronte and Bánach shored things up in the centre. Treason right-back Rian Corrello replaced Louis Hordern, and Michael Campbell came in at centre-half in place of Grant Carlin.

Schottia did start the match better, and with Crisisbless’ Bronte in the centre, the team had much more substance. In Renshaw and Jevđenijević they also had two strikers more than capable of winning the ball in the air, and the former came close to breaking the deadlock, as he headed a Bonnie McGillivray cross narrowly wide. Despite a decent start to the game, Schottia never really looked comfortable on the ball. Everything felt rushed, and with the exception of perhaps McGillivray and Bronte, no one wanted to stand up and be counted.

The anger among the Schottia fans who’d travelled to see the match was palpable after Olastor scored the only goal of the game. In theory this should have been the easiest game of the group, and a win here represented Schottia’s best chance of qualifying. Sonny had made some big calls, in dropping Camila Soria Luna, playing Conjure on the right, and going with a conventional front two. None of it worked, and a woman of the match performance from Maeve Bronte did nothing to save him from the merciless Schottic press.

Rumours of a bitter exchange in the Schottic dressing room, following the match with Olastor, were all but confirmed the next day, with news that Martel-Burns and Conjure would take no more part in the campaign. Assistant manager, Killanen, who is believed to have nearly come to blows with the Brinemouth midfielder, was also absent from the technical area as Schottia prepared to take on the group’s second seeds, Pridnestrovia.

---

Schottia 2-1 Pridnestrovia @ Mastad Qusma
Line-up: Lorrey, Corrello, McGillivray (D.Morham), Ünterhausen, Campbell, Cnocstanger, Avelione (Soria Luna), Bronte, Bánach (Inescourt), Jevđenijević, Renshaw
Goals: Renshaw, Cnocstanger

---

The papers had already made up their mind that this was going to be Schottia’s last involvement, and with it, Sonny’s final game in charge. Many journalists had already published their post mortems, with the nation’s international comeback being labelled a farce, rushed, and chaotic. However, while what happened next can’t exactly be considered a vintage performance, it at least gave the scriptwriters some pause for thought.

Pridnestrovia have proven themselves to be no pushovers in the Copa Rushmori, and their predominantly home-based side have taken some significant scalps in the past. Jock Sonny went with the same starting eleven, with 21-year-old Pirates star, Reay Cnocstanger, slotting into the right-wing role in place of Conjure. Schottia were desperate for some consistency, but as things stood that seemed impossible. That said, in what was a solid start to the game, the Auks got their beaks in front for the first time since their return.

Some good play from Avelione on the left flank took Yuri Tymoshenko out of the game, allowing the Bastion forward to pick out Renshaw for the opener. It was the Colonial Sile striker’s first international goal in five years, and it was obvious from his reaction how import this was.

Schottia actually played some good football in the opening hour or so, with Corrello, Cnocstanger, Avelione and McGillivray having a fair bit of joy in the wide areas. There was even an excellent chance for the side to double their lead just before the break, but Jevđenijević’s strike from the edge of the area was well stopped by keeper, Ferdinand Abbing.

It seemed painfully predictable, given all that had come to pass over the past week, that Schottia would blow the lead at the first opportunity. That was indeed the outcome, as Gaëtano Bernardeschi’s side surged forward on the counter attack. The up-until-now flawless, Mike Campbell, was destroyed for pace, as Mark Polzin passed him by before squaring for Boyan Radev to equalise.

It seemed as if Schottia’s participation in the tournament was over, with the goal appearing to herald a return to the misplaced passing, which had dogged the opening two matches. Sonny brought on James Inescourt and Soria Luna, but they seemed like the kind of substitutes one made out of desperation, rather than a belief you could change the game.

There was to be one last twist in the tale, however: one which not even Schottic fans would have predicted. An accurate long ball forward from Bánach caught Renshw in an onside position, the V-League stars combining well to release Jevđenijević through on goal. The Oldhem Knights striker failed to lift his shot over the onrushing Abbing, but luckily Cnocstanger was on hand to tuck away the rebound.

Two-one was the final score, and a glance across at the other results revealed that Schottia had somehow done enough to qualify. One win, and a negative goal-difference, but it was all they needed to set up a knock-out round tie with former regional champs, Taeshan. The Purple Knights are no strangers to this competition, and after coming through a group including Eura, it’s clear that Xander McDrew’s side have rediscovered their form.

If they are to have any hope of progression, Schottia are going to need to hold their nerve, and try to play the way they did during the first hour with Pridnestrovia.

---

Predicted XI v Taeshan: Lorrey, Corrello, McGillivray, Ünterhausen, Hare, Cnocstanger, Avelione, Bronte, Bánach, Jevđenijević, Renshaw

[Qusmo]

SPONY LUQ TELEVISION

Hello, all. Welcome to Spony Luq Television, broadcasting from Qanz, Qusmo. Copa Rushmori XXXII has begun in earnest. After thirty-six group stage matches, we have already seen plenty of excitement from some great teams - but the sixteen knockout matches to come promise the highest suspense, the most memorable moments, & the best quality of football. Sixteen of the original twenty-four nations in competition are still eligible to be crowned champions of Rushmore, & all eyes are on Qusmo to determine which one it will be. With that, let’s get to our first question, from a viewer in Wexe, Qusmo.

I hear the bracket’s a little bit different than normal. Is anyone at a disadvantage because of that?

The Copa Rushmori XXXII bracket was designed to eliminate group advantage - the fact that teams could have a tangible benefit from playing in a certain group rather than another, even if all the teams remained the same - while increasing win incentive - the value of winning & performing well in every group stage match - & preserving group diversity - the idea that rematches from the group stage should be kept to a minimum. That all sounds nice, but it probably doesn’t come as much consolation to fans of Taeshan. The Purple Knights emerge from the group stage as one of seven unbeaten teams, one of three teams on a perfect nine points, & the only team in the group stage to have kept three consecutive clean sheets in the group stage. That was only enough to earn them the third seed in the knockout rounds bracket, however. As a result, they may have to take on another group winner as early as the quarterfinals - & because of a surprise last-matchday loss to Oberour Ar Moro after they had already won Ekwadup Vaspola, World Cup 74 & Copa Rushmori XXX champions Nephara is the team to be slotted in for a potential quarterfinals clash.

Even before dealing with the Cormorants, however, the Copa Rushmori champions of precisely ten editions ago must deal with a formidable opponent in the octofinals: two-time Independents Cup champion & World Cup 79 champion Schottia, which stumbled in its first two Copa Rushmori matches but squeaked in as the fourth of four third-place teams to advance to the knockouts on a close Matchday Three victory. Manager Xander McDrew has been tasked with having a strong Copa Rushmori campaign just to save his job, but his reward for a perfect group stage featuring an unblemished defensive record & a win over Eura is an extraordinarily difficult road to the semifinals.

Olastor can empathize with Taeshan, as the team which topped Qusmo’s group must take on Eura in order to advance past the octofinals. The team defeated Pridnestrovia & Schottia to ensure it would win its group with a result against Qusmo, & to ensure it would advance to the knockouts even with a loss on the final matchday of the group stage. Indeed, Olastor did score the first goal the hosts have conceded in a Copa Rushmori since their first edition of the tournament, against Ceni in Copa Rushmori XXX, & they won Ekwadup Qusma as a result. With the reward of facing the two-time World Cup champions in the octofinals, however, perhaps they wish they hadn’t.

Further, even if Olastor can defeat the Copa Rushmori XXVII champions in the octofinals, they would have to face either a former champion of the World Cup in successive cycles or the defending Copa Rushmori champions in the quarterfinal. Savojarna was ranked as the fourth-seeded group winners in the tournament, allowing them to face a third-place team in the octofinals in their quest to defend their maiden title in football; however, it turned out to be Cassadaigua, the champions of World Cups 50 & 51. Though that was a while ago, Cassadaigua is also the only nation from Rushmore which won a knockout round match at World Cup 82. They are certainly a force to contend with, especially for being buried in the third-place seedings of the table. In order to become the fourth nation to successfully defend a Copa Rushmori title, Savojarna may have to defeat two multiple-time World Cup winners - before even reaching the semifinals. In fact, that’s something that both group winners of the lower left quarter of the bracket might have to do to emerge from it.

However, at least these teams can take solace from the fact that they are in the octofinals at all; they still have a chance of going farther, & even if they don’t, they did at least make it to the knockouts. Other teams were not as lucky. Take, for example, Darmen. After taking only two points from Copa Rushmori XXXI’s group stage & after losing three consecutive matches in World Cup 82, bowing out as bottom in their groups in both tournaments, Darmeni manager Godefroy Abascal has been threatened with his job if his team does not go far. However, with only a draw to Oberour Ar Moro, an embarrassing loss to Nephara that tied for the second-largest margin of victory in this tournament’s group stage, & zero goals in a loss to Saintland in their final chance, it looks like Abascal will be out the door, leaving Darmen searching for their next manager - & their first win in a major tournament since World Cup 81. That brings us to our next question, from a viewer in Ixtun, Qusmo.

How well is Qusmo doing so far? How far can they go?

Qusmo has been doing well enough - but not extraordinarily so. After successfully dispatching wildcard debutants Schottia, the team was confident it could win its group, perhaps even scoring well in the group winners table. However, it was not to be, as Qusmo could not score against Pridnestrovia to give them their only point of the tournament & then conceded late to Olastor to allow them to win the group. Instead, Qusmo has to settle for five points & a second-place finish in Ekwadup Qusma.

That late goal snapped a streak of six consecutive clean sheets for Qusmo in Copa Rushmori play, though the team is still unbeaten in its last seven Copa Rushmori matches; both streaks date back to Copa Rushmori XXX, Qusmo’s first competition, when they were thrashed three-nil in the octofinals by Ceni, in Qusmo’s bogey team’s final victory to date. That match also stands as the only time Qusmo has conceded multiple goals in a single match at the Copa Rushmori, with eleven such matches played. However you put it, historically, Qusmo has an excellent defense, especially at this tournament. That has shown through at this tournament, where Qusmo’s one goal conceded in the group stage bested every other team’s defensive performance save for Taeshan’s, which featured three consecutive clean sheets.

However, Qusmo has had struggles on the offensive side of things, & they haven’t gone away. With a two-nil win, Qusmo’s opening match against Schottia stands as the only time this team has ever scored multiple goals in a single match at a Copa Rushmori. Their defense ensures they are always in matches, but their offense means they don’t run away with things - &, ultimately, they often can only secure a single point. In Qusmo’s first Copa Rushmori, the team lost three of their four matches. In the two Copas they have played in since, they have gone unbeaten in seven matches - but with four draws & only three wins. That is good enough to get to the knockout rounds, but to be successful once there, Qusmo needs to do better. After one appearance in the World Cup, two in the Cup of Harmony, & three in the Copa Rushmori, Qusmo has advanced to the knockout rounds in every tournament - but has gone no further in all but one Cup of Harmony. Qusmo will need to find its offense to be successful in their home tournament.

In their knockout round match, Qusmo will face a team with a very similar group stage performance, with five points & a second place finish. However, the teams come in with different expectations - & different perceptions of their performances thus far. While Qusmo was the top-ranked team in its group & the host nation, with players drawn from the best clubs in its country & around the Multiverse, including clubs which have advanced far in international play, the Askari Union is a ragtag bunch from Pot 3 which hasn’t competed on the world stage in quite some time, with rusty players who are generally unfancied to go far. The two teams have had similar showings thus far, but based simply on Qusmo’s quality, the hosts have tremendous expectations & pressure to win their first knockout match in a Copa Rushmori.

If they do that, they will face either Oberour Ar Moro, the second-ranked third-place team in the tournament, or Pasarga, the second-ranked team in the first-place table. Pasarga certainly is the team with the biggest name, having won World Cup 72 & Copas Rushmori XXI & XXV. The team would challenge Qusmo on both ends of the pitch, too, as their three goals conceded is tied for fifth in the tournament & their nine goals scored is tied with Savojarna for second, behind Sargossa. Pasarga isn’t just a team of pedigree, either, as they, too, advanced to the World Cup 82 knockout rounds & only bowed out on penalties, taking finalists Turori to the wire.

If Qusmo can find a way to advance to the quarterfinals & then defeat Pasarga once they’re there, then this Qusmo team will have accomplished something big - but they would then have either Taeshan, Nephara, Mytanija, or Schottia waiting for them in the semifinals & then have to face either Sargossa, top of the group winners table of this tournament; Savojarna, defending Copa Rushmori champions; Eura, two-time World Cup champions; Cassadaigua, also two-time World Cup champions; Valladares, Copa Rushmori XXVI champions; Saintland, Copa Rushmori XXIV champions; Falkyr, a brand-new wildcard; or Olastor, the team that stymied Qusmo to win Ekwadup Qusma in the first place. It would be a long & difficult road to the title for Qusmo - & they’d have to get past several difficult opponents in early knockout rounds & solve their own weaknesses before they can truly start dreaming about a maiden title. That brings us to our next question, from a viewer in Kolle, Qusmo.

Who will win the Copa Rushmori?

ICly, as per tradition, Spony Luq Television will broadcast its predictions for the knockout rounds during this broadcast. OOCly, however, it seems inappropriate for the host to make predictions for the tournament, given that I (obviously) have access to the actual scorination inputs.

So, that’s who we think will win - but there’s only one way to find out.

Ekwadup Qusma
Pridnestrovia 1–2 Schottia
Olastor 1–1 Qusmo

  Ekwadup Qusma          Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Olastor                  3   2  1  0    5   3  +2    7
2 Qusmo                    3   1  2  0    3   1  +2    5
3 Schottia                 3   1  0  2    2   4  −2    3
4 Pridnestrovia            3   0  1  2    3   5  −2    1

Qusmo can’t win group but advances to octofinal against the Askari Union
Olastor 1–1 Qusmo
Mastad Qanza, Qanz, Qusmo (cap. 60 000)

---

GK  Xynat-Evela Cuf
CB  Cunix-Betva Tla
CB  Yelto-Alfan Ono
CB  Zenon-Gerol Kal
DM  Jerat-Jonto Jan
CM  Ilinx-Kepex Zev
AM  Gavax-Nenzi Abe
LM  Helek-Nenzi Ono
82’ Yoltz-Tlanx Sal
RM  Forzu-Ralox Kal
82’ Nirlo-Betva Uzo
SS  Paliv-Xilit Max
74’ Yunal-Julad Waz
ST  Xilit-Zaxac Yol (63’)

[Falkyr]

"The fuck?" Sjurd scanned the website once more. "How the hell did we advance with one win?"
Dagmar tutted from over his shoulder. "Excessively permissive format. Is this usual for your dimension?"
"No, this is weird. I mean, I've seen the Atlanteans pull shit like this, but they're already weird."
"Everything here is weird. But we still have a game to play." The manager clasped a hand on Sjurd's shoulder, leaning forward and pointing. "These graphics are confounding--which circle are we? Who are we playing?"
"Here, the very top-left--we're 'FKR.' Sargossa is who we're playing, an island off in the northwest. They're an isolationist dictatorship with, historically, one of the strongest economies in Rushmore."
"Hrm. Sounds like they may make a good ally in this otherwise democracy-ridden region; I'll make note for the next time I make smalltalk with the Queen. How about their football?"
"They've shifted to a flashy, aggressive style recently; but they've got quite a lot history. A handful of Copa wins back in the day, though this new style has brought them a sort of renaissance in the World Cup--still nowhere near winning it, but at least they're consistently qualifying now."
As he'd been rattling, Dagmar had pulled up Sargossa's press release on his phone. "A very front-loaded formation, interesting. We'll be best fit to catch them on the counter, then." He snapped the phone closed and turned to rejoin the practicing team.

Sjurd sighed into his seat. He'd been hoping for more a football-centric role on the team to keep his mind occupied; sure, he'd run a few drills or spitball some strategies when it was called for, but he'd been far too busy as the team's liaison to this universe to separate himself from the disaster. Watching the team unknowingly lose to two of Falcus' historic rivals at the same time? A bit of a kick to the nards. At least they'd kept the Eura game competitive...
"How you holding up, big guy?" Sjurd felt another hand on his shoulder, one that felt... strangely familiar...
He kicked off the desk and spun his chair around, revealing Ásbjörn Tachibana had snuck into the office. "Ási! How long has it been?" he guffawed, popping up and giving one of his patented bear hugs.
"Too long," she wheezed, trying to remember how to get out of it. "They've got me busy in Apox; I'm trying not to get used to the bottom of the table."
"And you've still got time to see and old wash-out like me?"
She finally managed to slip out of his grasp, and put on a strained smile. They'd have to talk about it eventually. "I'm on the way back from visiting, uh... 'home.' To try and... clean things up, I guess."
"Right," he mumbled and straightened up. "How bad was it?"
"I did... as well as any could, as hard as it is to think like that. Both of my kids made it, which is why I'm not a nervous wreck right now. Sven made it through, and our parents were already gone, so... just further relatives."
"That's good, Ási. I'm happy for you, and we need to take every bit of happiness we can get here."
"That we do. What about you?"
Sjurd gave a light shrug. "I didn't have much to lose. I didn't know if any of my family was alive before the event, nevermind after. Never settled down. Really... the team was the closest I had." And that's when he started to tear up. "I... we were... having a meeting. Discussing the CR, when it happened. Eduardo disappeared in my hands, and Mårten right after."
"Oh, Sjurd..." Ásbjörn returned the hug, and they held each other tightly for a long while.

[Qusmo]

It's time for the knockouts. Good luck to all.

Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk
I'm a footballer; no time to talk.
PA loud & stadia warm
I've kicked around since I was born.
& now, it's alright, it's okay.
& you may look the other way
We can try to understand
Spony Luq's effect on people

Everybody's just trying to stay alive.

Octofinals
Sargossa 5–3 Falkyr
Valladares 0–0 Saintland (0–0 AET) (4–3 pen.)
Savojarna 1–1 Cassadaigua (2–1 AET)
Olastor 2–5 Eura
Pasarga 3–3 Oberour Ar Moro (4–3 AET)
The Askari Union 0–2 Qusmo
Taeshan 0–0 Schottia (0–2 AET)
Nephara 0–0 Mytanija (0–0 AET) (4–5 pen.)

Qusmo's match was generously scored by Banija

[Pasarga]

Choose my goalscorers Y
Godmod Scoring Events Y
RP injuries to my players N
Godmod injuries to my players N
Hand out Yellow cards to my players Y
Hand out Red cards to my players Y
Godmod Other Events Y

Pasarga Roster
Nickname: Wanderers
Ranking: 12th
Most Caps: Mór Császár (196)
Most Goals: Ingþór Auðbjörnsson (106)


Kits

Home Away Third
Modifier: +1

Manager: Mór Császár, age 49
Assistant: Mezei Orbán, age 48

Home Stadium: Stade de Torgos (90,000)

Goalkeepers
GK: Sasa Szatmáry, age 26, Club Stein-los (F)
GK: Thorsten Gerber, age 31, CA Paulinthal
GK: Aswad Munif Shalhoub, age 32, OAS Royal FC
GK: Ambrus Galambos, age 25, Stein-los Turkish
GK: Lucas Lemann, age 32, Eletti Valligiani

Gerber has a solid grasp on the number one shirt, as his performances for both club and country have been above and beyond what one could ask of a keeper, as the goals that he does concede are often conceding from a position in which he could do little to prevent. Shaloub is definitely the more athletic and pure shot stopper, being the second choice by a clear margin over the rest of the pool, but there is a certain confidence and swagger in the way that Gerber carries himself that has his spot solidified. After a stellar season as one of the best keeper's in the league with Stein-los Turkish, Galambos not only makes the pool, but looks to be the last of the keepers who would make a trip to Apox of Valanora if the team were to qualify directly ahead of the veteran Lemann.

Defenders
LB: Juhana Jäntti, age 32, Sabrefell Athletic (F)
LB: Kristof Lakatos, age 21, Sardin United
LB: Florian Kuefer, age 29, Stein-los Turkish
CB: Neci Földessy, age 30, CA Paulinthal
CB: Renata Novaković, age 22, Baskita FC (F)
CB: Guðný Ingólfsdóttir, age 29, Tanrısal (F)
CB: Ralf Bader, age 26, Directus
CB: Torsten Mueller, age 24, Stein-los Turkish
CB: Christian Berg, age 26, Starling
RB: Raynaldo Puga Burgos, age 22, Santos Luega
RB: Dirk Freitag, age 29, Falourr
RB: Linka Polak, age 26, Baskita FC (F)

Listen, we all know that two years ago it was age that was the main problem with the Wanderers defense, as they seemed to always be a step behind in those crucial moments when the squad faltered. As a result, it is this group that has seen the most turnover and with a dip into the younger players, with Lakatos, Burgos, and Novaković all being included in the pool at young ages and good outputs for their domestic clubs. However the spine of Bader, Földessy, and Berg will be quite the force in the middle, while Freitag is as reliable as they can come in the rightback position. Kuefer is a solid enough choice and offers a bit of pace after Jäntti's long stint as the holder of the leftback spot, though Polak would like to be given a go in either wingback position after her stellar play for Baskita and the Young Wanderers, having believed she has earned her chance to be part of the rotation for the national team with her pace and strength.

Midfielders

RW: Fjóla Sigurjónsdóttir, age 32, Real Azuris (F)
RW: Jan Gersten, age 23, Bastion
RW: Ádám Berecz, age 24, Baskita FC
A/MC: Jörg Feierabend, age 29, CA Paulinthal
D/MC: Ríkharður Valdemarsson, age 30, Northern Union
MC: Jürgen Eisenhower, age 30, Revolutionaires
MC: Matthias Maur, age 26, Club Stein-los
MC: Sophie Nagel, age 25, Lunas FC (F)
D/MC: Edelberto Menéndez Trejo, age 26, Sardin United
LW: Dominik Krause, age 32, Ulsa
LW: Orsolya Gere, age 26, Sabrefell Athletic
AML/LW: Kati Szöllôsy, age 27, Tanrısal (F)

Perhaps it is nostalgia or undue loyalty to players that most fans have grown a bit resentful towards, but Mór Császár has decided to keep his midfield pool mostly intact, with only the loss of Tar Hunor to aging out of the pool. This is the last chance for the likes of Eisenhower and Feierabend to impress the rabid fans of the national team, as all their success with the club teams means little with the Wanderers having hit a bit of a skid in terms of performance while they have been at the core of the team. It is interesting that Ríkharður Valdemarsson has made the pool, given his age, but with Northern Union winning the league in Brenecia and his defensive work being a key component to that title win, he is being given a chance and might prove to be a very late bloomer and just the right amount of new blood to challenge the already established players to buck their ideas and try something new.

Strikers

ST: Ingþór Auðbjörnsson, age 32, AC Izotz Zubia
ST: Alexander Kárpáty, age 27, Crawford City FC
ST: Claudio Romano, age 29, Sabrefell Moths
ST: Katharina Schwarz, age 22, Paulinthal FC (F)
ST: Oriel Villagómez Acuna, age 21, Santos Luega
AMC/ST: Alexander Jager, age 24, Revolutionaries

Some believed that two years ago that Thor was on his last chance, but as the talismanic striker as he is, Thor has shown the ability to shrug of the effects of aging and keep going. While perhaps a half step slower than he was two years ago, his lethal touch from both foot and head is still among the best in the world and when paired with an absolutely blazing poacher in his own right with Kárpáty, it is clear that this frontline is still quite formidable. Lets not forget that Romano and Jager are no ordinary backups either, as those two would likely start for most other squads in the top 32 of the world, while Schwarz graduates from the Young Wanderers and into the full senior team, where she will not have to try to carry a team alone.

Formation And Tactics


Mór Császár takes the reigns now and not much will really change on the surface, with the former Wanderers' midfielder using what appears to most people as the typical Pasargan 4-4-2, the most common formation played and employed by Pasargan managers. However in his take on the formation, the roles are more defined and the way he plays his two in the center of the midfield actually plays more like a diamond in the middle, though that is likely due to the sheer attacking talent that Feierabend possesses and his preferred playing as a more attacking midfielder. Unlike Tobias who wanted his fullbacks to get up into the attack when possible, Mór wants them to stay back, though he does want his backline to play relatively high and press in the opposition when the squad is out of possession. This allows the wingers to dedicate more into the attack and get good service into the plethora of good attackers who should be ready to convert at a moments notice inside the box.

Captain: Ingþór Auðbjörnsson
Corner Taker: Orsolya Gere
Set Pieces: Jörg Feierabend
Penalties: Ingþór Auðbjörnsson

[Schottia]

Purgatory
Or; The Loneliness of A Third Choice Goalkeeper

Part Three.

Gofer

The meeting with Katie Andrews had touched Jens Schläger in a way he wasn’t used to. Once you’d been in the private detection business for thirty years, you’d probably seen everything, and learned to look on most cases with a dispassionate professionalism. He’d delivered good news, bad news, and no news at all. He’d left clients in despair at their cheating partner, and reunited long-lost brothers. The reaction he normally got when he told people what he did for a living was: ”At least it’s not dull…” He never had the heart to break it to them, but for the most part, it was fantastically dull. Hours of sifting the internet, perusing phonebooks, raking through rubbish bins, and painstakingly following half-leads. Despite the monotony, Schläger was addicted to it. He needed it. With no wife or family around to occupy his time, he had filled the gaping voids in his life with endless hours of tedious work.

‘Hello, yes, I would like to request a document.’ Schläger said into the receiver, the phone was pinned to his ear against his shoulder, a pen poised above his notepad. The North Island accent was gone, replaced by a generic and instantly forgettable South Schottic brogue. ‘Yes of course you may. I’m calling on behalf of Granton Vale Football Club. It’s pertaining to one of our players, Katie Andrews..?’ He waited for a minute as the officious sounding woman at the registrar’s office paused on the other end of the line (no doubt to pre-emptively key the name into her computer). ‘We are trying to complete her records, and we need an official copy of her birth certificate to register her for the new season.’

Of course their were certain security questions Schläger needed, but he already had her address, her date of birth was on the club website, and her mother’s name was in the phonebook.

‘Thank you so much Ms...? Mrs Rodgers. No. No, I’ll send round on of our gofers to pick it up, registration is today. Excellent. Yes, you too, thank you for your time.’

Schläger put the phone down and paused for a minute before pouring himself a generous measure of whisky, and bringing it to the kitchen table. He knew what he expected to see on the birth certificate, but he had to read the words with his own eyes. There was something about Katie Andrews’ reaction that told him straight away; a sort of grief, bubbling up from the depths of her consciousness at the news that D’Araby had a wife and children. Andrews had been mourning the death of a life she had never had; a relationship with a father that she had been unfairly denied.

Schläger sunk his whisky and got to his feet. Heading to the side unit of his kitchen, he pressed the plunger of his French press, and decanted the over-stewed coffee into a small tartan thermos flask. He slung his jacket over his shoulders and grabbed his bonnet, and his mobile.

‘Hello, Christian?’ He said as soon as the he heard the receiver picked up, sparing his colleague from going through the normal spiel for the clients.

‘Jens’ Christian Busch answered, sounding a little surprised. ‘How did it go this morning?’

‘Routine.’ Schläger lied. ‘Handed over the findings – client satisfied.’ He decided not to mention the fact that Katie Andrews had flown from the meeting like a scolded cat. He didn’t want Busch or the Hacke brothers harassing the poor woman to make sure they were still going to get paid.

‘Good, nice one Jens.’ Busch replied. ‘Are you on your way back to the office or– ’

‘Actually Christian, I have a couple of leads I’m currently following up.’ He balanced his phone once more between his shoulder and his ear while removing his cigarettes and lighter. ‘Old leads…’ He sparked up. ‘I’m heading back across to Handon for a couple of hours – actually don’t expect me in today. I’ll text you later and let you know my plans for the rest of the week.’

‘Okay my friend.’ Busch answered without any concerns. ‘Just keep in touch, and I’ll give you a shout if anything important lands on the desk.’

‘Take care my friend.’

Schläger put his flask of coffee into his deep jacket pocket, and grabbed his car keys as he marched out, ready to play the gofer.

---

SBCNEWS Online...
Football special - Copa Rushmori

---

---

Taeshan 0–0 Schottia (0–2 AET) @ Mastad Poldanza
Line-up: Lorrey, Corrello (Hordern), McGillivray, Ünterhausen, Hare, Cnocstanger (Soria Luna), Avelione, Bronte, Bánach, Jevđenijević (K.Morham), Renshaw
Goals: Bánach, Avelione

---

There was late drama at the Mastad Poldanza last night as Schottia’s theatrical Copa Rushmori campaign trundled on to fight another day. The tournament has, so far, had more ups and downs than Corinne Martel-Burns, with Schottia riding out an abysmal start to somehow book a place in the quarterfinals. Jock Sonny’s charges failed to find the net in normal time as they took on CR22 champs, Taehan, but some stoppage time heroics were enough to get them over the line.

The Purple Knights have played some good football this tournament so far, toping a group consisting of Falkyr, Crystalline Caverns, and Eura. They are a young side, who have been steadily building momentum, and this was not an easy game for Schottia by any stretch of the imagination.

Schottia have the look of a team who might have turned a corner, however, and while it wasn’t always easy on the eye, Sonny seems to have at least put together a starting eleven that is tough to break down. John Hare was a late addition to the line-up, after veteran centre-back Michael Campbell failed a late fitness test. Other than that, it was the same four-four-two formation that started against Pridnestrovia.

To be fair, Schottia started the match with a bit more confidence, as Maeve Bronte looked calm and collected in the centre of the park. Jack Avelione created what was probably the best chance of the first half, as the Bastion forward left Daigo Coshan for dead, before clipping the wrong side of the back post with a curling effort.

Taeshan had the lion’s share of possession but will have been frustrated by how little they created early on. Strong defending from Spartangrad’s Mark Ünterhausen, in particular, ensured that nothing got through.

In the second half there were chances at both ends, but as Ross Renshaw and Geoffrey Klingenberg saw efforts comfortably saved by Jacob Jingleheimer-Smitt and Ed Lorry respectively, it seemed like it was going to be a long match for the neutral. As the game wore on it looked increasingly likely that neither side were going to break the deadlock. Schottia introduced Camila Soria Luna to the proceedings but the recently released Mâ Âlâmëómë attacker could to little to make an impact.

With the scores nil-nil after ninety minutes, we were headed for a nail biting thirty minutes of extra time. Given the fact that striking options were thin on the ground, Schottia were forced to throw Dilon Bánach up front, with Corvistone’s Krista Morham slotting into the midfield. It was a move that seemed to pay off, with Morham releasing Avelione down the left flank, who in turn picked out Bánach to slip the ball past Jingleheimer-Smitt from close range. With Taeshan pushing hard for an equaliser, it was Avelione who took advantage, using his pace to spring the counter attack and fire past the keeper after a forty-metre sprint up the pitch.

It was a strong finish to a game, where Schottia took advantage of tired legs, and their big-club players came through for them. The Auks are still having trouble creating and converting chances, but with the exception of the opening game with Qusmo, they seem to have stopped conceding. Jock Sonny also was keen to point out the impact of Crisisbless’ Bronte in the press conference. The wee holding midfielder was little used during WC80; but, with the team needing to dig deep, they have reaped the benefits of having a world class defensive midfielder in their ranks.

Predicted XI v Mytanija: Lorrey, Corrello, McGillivray, Ünterhausen, Hare, Cnocstanger, Avelione, Bronte, Bánach, Jevđenijević, Renshaw

[Savojarna]

Pitchnerds - the Savojar Football Tactics Blog

Copa Quarterfinal Preview: Challenging Eura's Defence

Ahead of the upcoming Copa Rushmori quarterfinal, many Savojars damned the group stage for dealing what is truly not the best hand to Savojarna. The Northlights weren't really to blame, although their unnecessary draw to the Askari Union, sealed only in the last minutes of the game by Jotansson recording his first ever international goal, didn't help. But as it was enough to secure the fourth place among group winners, they would face a not-so-tough opponent, right? Well, yeah. It was a third placed opponent, but it wouldn't have had to be the third-placed opponent from the rather deadly Sargossa - Mytanija - Cassadaigua group. Nonetheless, Savojarna's tactical fluidity gave them a late win over the Cassadagans after it was 1-1 for a long, long time. Eventually, Karjanen did what he does best by dropping back between the Cassadagan lines and picking up the ball in a trequartista role, combine through with Jashkin and then feed the ball to Voynov, who shot Savojarna to the quarterfinals. And thanks to more top nations messing up their group stage, they'd face none less than Eura. Joy to the world indeed.

For those of you who haven't followed international football recently (what are you doing here?) there has been some bad blood between the two, although on the pitch the rivalry is as amicable as it is fierce. Their initial high-stakes clash was during WC80, the first and only time the Northlights made it to the final stage of that tournament. There, they surprisingly managed a draw, but that was not enough to make it out of the group stage for the Savojars. However, the Savojarna vs. Eura game would soon become an honoured Copa Rushmori tradition. Their next clash, a quarterfinal during the Copa 30 in Mytanija, was decided by the Euran coach Daniel Belgrave completely outclassing his Savojar counterpart, Arnulf Viljansson. As Vili decided to not adapt his defensive-heavy, wide setup to Eura, he was chanceless against an Euran team set up perfectly to counter that strategy. A deep defence that gave the wings to the Savojars but then stroke back deadly on the counter left them in the dust with a 4-1 to Eura. Revenge came two years later in the Copa 31 semifinals, with the most famous encounter between the two. Savojar fans, it is a well known scenery: A summer night in Thessia, the weather warm and humid, the sky mostly clear, dawn breaking in as the teams march onto the field. The red-clad Eurans facing off the Savojars in blue, the final of the Copa on the line. The stadium was packed with Savojar fans following their dramatic victory over Qusmo, and the game was on knife's edge when Lenka Otalainen took a shot from 22 metres out, time ticking down, and scored low to the right. Savojarna had slain the giant Eura and marched on to the semis. Now, they'd meet again, but a stage earlier.

Tactically, things have changed for both sides. For both, it is their first tournament under their new coaches, the young and innovative Olaf Jurtanen for Savojarna and the more experienced Michael Brandon of Eura. Tactical differences will be less pronounced than they were in Cassadaigua, with the Savojars finding their new thirst for offence and Eura sticking to their high-pressure, high-goal game - or not? Eura lined up in a 4-2-3-1, a formation that we like to deride as somewhat overly ambiguous and not that fun to watch because it doesn't really excel at anything except shutting down the centre of the pitch a bit. Despite interpreting the formation rather offensively, the Eurans have only scored two goals and were shut out by Crystalline Caverns (0-0) as well as Taeshan (0-1). In their 2-1 victory over Falkyr, the usual attacking prowess was subdued, most likely due to the lack of a brilliant finisher - Dion Underwood may be world-class, but with Eura no longer sticking to Belgrave's counter-focused game, his speed is not the decisive asset it used to be. Interestingly, Eura do not really struggle to get goal chances, as they manage to create a lot of pressure. This could prove decisive against Savojarna and will put a major challenge to the Northlights. There will likely be one decisive battle that determines the outcome of this match. That battle is the duel for the central midfield between Oscar Coltrane and the duo Hoyberg - Andersson. With Savojarna's formation leaving a bit of open space in the centre, there is a lot of potential for the Euran double six to pressure that area, and if Hoyberg and Andersson can't control Coltrane the Euran triforce in the centre may overwhelm Savojarna. But Savojarna's Magical Rectangle with its tactical fluidity so far succeeded largely in tearing open the opponent. What is the secret behind the team's attacking success?

Two patterns of success


Buildup of Savojarna in the octofinal. Black denotes defensive passing lanes, blue denotes key passing lanes, red denotes important running paths

Although Savojarna do line up in a 4-2-2-2 originally, that is primarily true off the ball. With the ball, the central midfielders and the forwards stack in order to combat the issue of the open midfield. Thus, the formation essentially turns into a 3-3-3-1, which offers a lot of passing lanes. Typically, the Savojars switch from the centre to the middle against solidly built up teams, but in the group stage we have seen them play more passes along the line from a fullback to his same-side winger if there was a lot of clutter in the middle. Joonas Andersson is the key player in the defensive buildup and usually the first one to receive the ball from Petrova, resulting in the situation in the diagram. From this position, the back three, together with Petrova, often cycle the ball to open up passing lanes, and Hoyberg either drops back or Petrova plays a long ball to kick off the attack.

There are two key buildups to the Savojar side. One is the central option, in which case Andersson loads off to Hoyman. Hoyman usually feeds the ball off to the sides, playing into the open space ahead of Voynov or Jashkin. However, occasionally and especially against more defensive sides, the fullbacks join in and take over these balls, while Jashkin or Voynov assume a lurking position on the edge of the box. From the wing, these two are usually looking for creative solutions: Either they cut in between the opposing fullback and centre-back to take a shot or open up either a fullback or a striker, or they combine together with Karjanen, who often waits long until he enters the box. Crosses usually are played by the fullbacks, although Jashkin has found a pattern relying on near-post crosses to Sigurdsson particularly against shorter opposition. The second attack pattern is the fullback option, which sees the fullbacks stay behind and circulate the ball together with Hoyberg and their near-side centre back. They then search a pass between the lines to Karjanen, who tries to either break through or find a partner within the front three. In this case, the system almost assumes a 4-3-3 with Voynov, Jashkin and Sigurdssson up front and Karjanen in the game-maker position. This pattern is particularly prevalent against teams which have an high defensive midfield that leaves space between the lines, or very strong fullbacks that manage to shut down Jashkin and Voynov, and was crucial in Savojarna's win over Queer Poco el Mono Ara, with Karjanen being the dominant figure of the match.

The key to Savojarna's offensive play is its fluidity. Karjanen, a nominal striker, often drops back. Sigurdsdottir moves sideways in the box a lot, often opening up one side for Karjanen or the far side winger who cuts in towards the long post to head it in. Nurkanen and Jashkin often switch positions, which is something Voynov and Jensen do to a lesser extent (although it still occurs). Hoyman can be very fluid in particular if the fullback option is used more often, in which case the central midfielder tends to swing out to either side and back up the fullback that moves up the pitch. In the end of the game, he also often moves forward between the wingers, leading to a much more attacking formation that helped them to score a late goal against Cassadaigua. Against Eura, both variations could work, but presumably the wingers will see more action given the two central midfielders in the Euran side. If the Savojars manage to draw Eura outside, the fluid formation may also strike against the Rushmori giant.

[Qusmo]

As always, no offense is intended to any nation or user OOCly.

A Blog

Soon-To-Be CHAMPIONS OF RUSHMORE

NEPHARA IS DEAD. LONG LIVE QUSMO.

Did you know that, in Copa Rushmori XXXI, the host nation was knocked out in the quarterfinals by Nephara? Did you know that, in Copa Rushmori XXX, the host nation was knocked out in the round of sixteen by Nephara? Did you know that, in Copa Rushmori XXIX, the host nation won the tournament? You’d have to go all the way back to COPA RUSHMMORI XXVIII in order to find a host nation that didn’t either WIN their Copa Rushmoi or LOSE TO NEPHARA.

Well, guess WHAT? Nephara just got BEAT. You can give Qusmo the trphy now.

& heres another cold hard FACT did ou know that EVERY SINGLE TEAM that fiished second place in their group WON their knockout match except for the teams that were playing ANOTHER SECONDPLACE TEAM? & guess WHAT: Qusmo was SECOND PLACE. So that means were INVINCIBLE>

& this isnt just a trend from LITERLLY EVERY SINGLE SECOND PLACE TEAM IN THE TNEIRE TOURNAMENT except for the ones that played other second place teams ITS ALSO BECAUS QUSMO IS SO GOOD just think about it: Against the Ass Scary Union, Qusmo scored two goals & didnt even let one in. & on opening day against Scotia they did the EXACT SAME THING Qusmo has played TWENTYONE matches against other teams from Rushmore & Qusmo has NEVER done BOTH of those things in the SAME MATCH against another Rushmori team before EVER. Scotland & the Scary Ass Union are PREMNITIONS. They are SIGNS. They are OMENS. We are playing BETTER than we EVER HAVE & were goin to WIN the COPA RUSHMORI

& just LOOK at this: Qusmo has done great & all in group stages & whatnot but not as much in a knockout match. If you dont count third place playoffs the match against the Scary Ass People was Qusmos EIGHTH knockout match but it was the FIRST TIME qusmo has EVER scored MORE THAN ONE GOAL in that match. Just look at how calm cool colllected & sexy Ilinx-Kepex Zev looks. They didn’t let their team get nervous. They didnt get scared because it was the knockouts. They didnt get scared because it was on home soil. They didnt get scared because they were expected to go farther than they ever have before. They didnt get scared because they were playing agains tht Scary Ass People. Just think about that: they didnt get scared about their scarry asses OR the fact that theyre ass people whatever that is. THEY DONT GIVE ONE FUDGING HOOT about ANY of that. They just WIN.

& guess what? Theyre going to win against Pasarga because thats just what winners DO. In fact Qusmo has NEVER LOST to Pasarga or even DRAWN. & when QUsmo plays Pasarga for the first time that wont chnge.

& then they’ll be in the semifinals. Qusmo would play either SCHOTTIA or MYTATNAJYD. Qusmo beat Schottia BEFORE at this tournmaent & theyll do it AGAIN if they have to. & itd be match number SIX against MUFASA. Well GUESS WHAT? Everything the light touches is OURS & the forecast says the match will probably be SUNNY so we’ll WIN. Besides we have home field advantage which ALWAYS DETERMINES THE WINNER between Qusmo & MYMYMYMYNARCISISSM.

& then we get to the final. Who do we play? I dunno. But maybe its Valadares or Svjfjordjornarna. Well GUESS WHAT. We played BOTH of them in our FIRST Copa RUshmori & we played BOTH of them in our SECOND Copa Rushmori TOO & we improved EACH TIME. We took a 1-0 loss to Svjorvjabjorgjamorg & turned it into a 0-0 draw & we took a 1-0 loss to Valladdarress & we turned it into a 1-0 WIN. EVERY SINGLE COPA WE GET BETTER & QOPA XXXII QUSMO IS PEAK QUSMO EVOLUTION.

TERE IS NO DOUBT. QUSMO WILL WIN THE COPA RUSHMORI. Bet your lifes savings on it (& borrow some money from every bank you can & posibly the mafica too so you can bet it & really get a nice payout). Youll thank me latrr.

Octofinals
Sargossa 5–3 Falkyr
Valladares 0–0 Saintland (0–0 AET) (4–3 pen.)
Savojarna 1–1 Cassadaigua (2–1 AET)
Olastor 2–5 Eura
Pasarga 3–3 Oberour Ar Moro (4–3 AET)
The Askari Union 0–2 Qusmo
Taeshan 0–0 Schottia (0–2 AET)
Nephara 0–0 Mytanija (0–0 AET) (4–5 pen.)

Qusmo advances to quarters on home soil
The Askari Union 0–2 Qusmo
Mastad Ixtuna, Ixtun, Qusmo (cap. 60 000)

---

GK  Xynat-Evela Cuf
CB  Cunix-Betva Tla
73’ Ozolx-Alfan Ixi
CB  Yelto-Alfan Ono
CB  Zenon-Gerol Kal
DM  Jerat-Jonto Jan
CM  Ilinx-Kepex Zev (40’)
AM  Gavax-Nenzi Abe
LM  Helek-Nenzi Ono
77’ Yoltz-Tlanx Sal
RM  Forzu-Ralox Kal
77’ Nirlo-Betva Uzo
SS  Paliv-Xilit Max (64’)
ST  Xilit-Zaxac Yol

[Eura]

The ball clattered off the inside of the right hand post and in, leaving Euran goalkeeper Robert Griffin for dead. He punched the turf in anger and gesticulated a flurry of blame at his defenders as the Olastor forward whirled away in celebration. The striker had just set his side on course for a historic victory just after half time of their knock out clash against Eura. Michael Brandon had a lot to ponder. This side had not recovered well from their defeat to Taeshan, only squeaking through their group after a dull goalless draw against Crystalline Caverns. With Dion Underwood and now Anthony Townsend missing due to injury his side lined up against Olastor with Dean Sharp up top and Brigham's Freddie Wright making a rare start on the right wing. As a result his side were clearly weaker. Wright had been utterly ineffective and Brandon was already regretting not hauling him off. He hadn't had a single shot, and his four crosses had all been cleared by the first defender. Sharp had not played awfully by any stretch of the imagination but he cut a lonesome figure up top. Were it not for Liam Armstrong's deflected equaliser after Olastor had taken a first half lead, Eura would be trailing 2-0 rather than 2-1. There was an urgent need to change things up and prevent an embarrassing defeat that would raise questions about Brandon's appointment in the first place.

He gave it a few minutes more. Then came the final straw as Griffiths looped a ball into Sharp who chested it down, turned onto his right foot, and pulled the ball across to where Coltrane an Wright should have been running in to finish. Instead there was nobody there, Olastor cleared quickly, and broke on a rapid counter that Eura only narrowly survived. 'Ok then, this isn't working. Tom.' He summoned over his assistant Tom Riley who had been having passionate words with left back Ben Hall moments earlier. 'I think you were right at the break about the width. Its all too narrow and high, we need to let them come out a bit and punch through the wings.' Riley nodded attentively as Brandon ran the odds in his head. This was going to be a gamble. 'Let's do a triple.'
'All three subs?'
'Yeah, its what we need. Come on.' Eyebrows were raised all around when the board went up. Wright, Griffiths and shockingly Coltrane were going to make way, the entirety of Eura's attacking midfield. Coming on were Bond, Woakes and most interestingly of all Brandon's Nephara based project, John Fletcher. Fletcher would join Sharp in a front two with Woakes and Bond playing wide right and wide left respectively, but very far forward, much further forward even than the classic Euran 4-2-2-2 formation. Eura had gone from having one striker to almost having four.

Brandon's roll of the dice paid dividends within minutes. The bulldog like Bond wrestled a 50/50 ball from the feet of Olastor's right back and cut inside from all of 30 yards. He took an overconfident hit at goal which predictably a defender blocked with an outstretched boot. Yet the deflection that came from this fell nicely for Fletcher, who was able to hold it up just long enough for Sharp to find space. Fletcher laid it off to the striker and Sharp shot through two defenders from the edge of the box, taking the keeper by surprise and off balance to make it 2-2. It wasn't quite how he envisioned the breakthrough - Olastor were still playing a deep line and hadn't been lured out - but Brandon was pleased nonetheless that bringing on Fletcher had indeed created the conditions for Sharp to shine. Eura bombed forward again with Coles and Hall practically playing as a second wingers, leaving massive gaps in behind. Quality of possession was paramount or an Olastor goal on the counter was likely. Hall put in a cross and Fletcher met it first - his header thumped against the bar. Just like the woodwork, Olastor were rattled and were abruptly uneasy about trying to set off on the attack themselves. More crosses came in to no avail until finally Fletcher, sensational since he came on, met a header perfectly, directing it into the bottom left hand corner with a bounce just before it crossed the line.

Eura's opponents had gone from 2-1 up to 3-2 down in a very short space of time and looked unable to cope with the change in pace of the game. They were now forced to make substitutions and adopt a more attacking posture themselves. For about ten minutes it appeared to work, forcing Bond and Woakes to drop deeper, and Eura's pressure relented. However the energy had now sapped away from Olastor while Eura's backline had gained confidence. Blake and Roberts were getting behind everything, having earlier been disorganised and vulnerable. Now Olastor were coming out of their comfort zone as planned and Eura struck while they could. A flimsy thrown in was hoofed away by Coles and the bounce cleared the head of a diminutive opposition midfielder, allowing Bond to race onto the loose ball and sprint down the centre of the pitch. He kept going as the backtracking Olastor defenders failed to regain their shape. One desperately lunged in to try and prevent a fourth goal, but Bond held his balance and his nerve. His breakthrough had been long awaited for Eura and this was that moment. At 20 yards from goal, Bond put his left foot through the ball with venom, and watched it soar into the top right hand corner leaving the statuesque goalkeeper frozen. Minutes later a similar counter saw him break free again, only this time to be tackled hard halfway through the opposition half. It fell to Sharp to control the ball as he decelerated, lay it off for Woakes and appreciate the majesty of her finish, chipping the goalkeeper as he charged out to meet her. Eura were 5-2 up and Olastor looked broken. Brandon instructed his players to lower the tempo and play out the game, content with the victory and the manner of it.

[Qusmo]

Nations across Rushmore are pleading to Margaret: Don't stop us now.

Quarterfinals
Sargossa 0–2 Valladares
Savojarna 2–3 Eura
Qusmo 2–3 Pasarga
Schottia 0–1 Mytanija

Important Host Notice: I requested scorination for Pasarga-Qusmo from a neutral third-party, but they did not respond for nearly half an hour. As I have to go for a few hours very soon, I asked another third-party to scorinate for me as well, so I could get a result in before I had to go. However, I did not think to let the first scorinator know that I had also asked someone else. Unfortunately, the two results arrived almost instantaneously. Even worse, the results had two different winners. The first person I asked reported Pasarga 1–2 Qusmo; the second person I asked reported Qusmo 2–3 Pasarga. After some thought, because the match was in dispute, & because it was my error (& panic) that led to this mess, I decided that the right thing to do would be to hand the result to Pasarga.

[Sargossa]

Football doesn’t so much mess with the emotions as slap them full in the face and then push them into a canal. Something the Copa Rushmori octo-final between Sargossa and Falkyr exemplified to a tee. At 3 – 1 up the Corsairs, favourites to roll over their dimensionally challenged opponents. But anyone who believed that was that clearly hasn’t been paying attention. Sargossa might possibly be considered a heavyweight at this level but we’re painfully aware that this heavyweight suffers from a glass jaw.

Substitute Katharina Kristoffersen took full advantage of a snoozing defence, latching on to Sienkiewicz’s deftly weighted through ball and sliding it under the advancing Roberto Penedo. A turn of events that prompted an angry exchange of colloquial Sargossan between the keeper and his defence. The relationship wasn’t much helped when Zdzisława Laukkanen was allowed the freedom of the stadium to bring the ball out from the back. Over the halfway line she came. Forty yards from goal. Thirty yards. The defence backed off, the crowd yelled ‘shoooot!’, the Falkyr captain duly obliged. Now, we’re not hugely up to speed with the career of Zdzisława Laukkanen but surely she’s rarely hit one quite as sweetly as this. Penedo didn’t even move as the ball rocketed into the top corner.

Just like that the emotional pendulum swung away from the third seeds and towards their unranked opposition. They were now pinging it about with confidence while the dark blue clad former champions dropped deeper and deeper. Coach Rodrigo Defederico was prowling his technical area like a caged beast, pausing only to gesticulated wildly at his faltering side. And because he’s a gifted tactician that wild gesticulation clearly did the trick.

In truth it was a sucker punch to the gut of the unfortunate Falkyr. A loose pass forward was cut out by Fabián Parra. He quickly found César Goyoso, who drilled a ball forward for Miguel Ángel Berganza to run on to. Falkyr were caught pushing too far forward and as their defence desperately tried to get back into position Berganza squared the ball for Matías Cáceres to side foot home. The emotions had been duly slapped in the face. And here comes the canal.

Falkyr hit the front again, they had to. Buoyed by the fact that they’d already pierced the fragile Corsairs backline on three occasions. Although themselves had conceded four. And, cruelly enough, four became five. Alonzo Zevallos, ever the willing runner, provided the outlet for Penedo as the keeper launched the ball out after a Falkyr attack had come to naught. Zevallos tricked his way beyond his marker and drilled a low cross towards Cáceres at the near post. The ball nervily was sliced away by a covering defender but dropped to Goyoso, lurking on the edge of the penalty area. The Sporting San Marquez midfielder killed it with one touch and fired it in low with the next. The ball clattered into an outstretched leg, sending it crashing up into the roof of the night. As Goyoso wheeled away the Falkyr players dropped to their knees, their brave run was over.