I rarely do this, but feel that I do require an explanation as to my activities as of late.
I am coming out as dealing with depression, anxiety and alcoholism. Many of you who know me well are aware of such mental issues, but I know many of you are not aware. Within the past several weeks, I've had to make hard choices with myself on how I wish to proceed, not in game, but in RL generally.
You all make me drink. I love you all, but this game is frankly a cause of my alcoholism. I can not tolerate that anymore. I am growing older, and can't do it anymore like I could several years ago.
You all cause me to doubt myself as a player and as a human. I am fucking tired of the conspiracy shit. You may see me as evil, as is your right. But christ on a cracker, take a look in the mirror. You're not any better than I am.
I have indeed caused harm, and I sincerely apologize. I can't fix things, but I feel this message and my complete retirement may help. I understand if it does not.
I will not shout out folks, as you know personally how important you are to me. Everyone in this game I have genuine affection for. No one is an enemy to me, despite attempts to do things to make me want to drink more and cause myself to black out because you're damn dumb. And on that end, you know who you are. If not, then you're even more dumb and I hope you're called out on it.
I may come back, but I'd rather not. Too many years have been spent with me here and it is high time that newer folks take the reigns.
Love you all,
Dali.
Edit: Aelitia, I let you down. Out of everything in this game, I'm sorry for that. You deserve a good gameplay despite the shit you've been through. I hope TEP can treat you well. If not, darling, go elsewhere.
2nd Edit: I see some of you are watching this thread. Call me out on whatever you need to. I've threatened memoir, but us getting things hashed out now may be as good of a place to do it.
3rd Edit: Please fucking sort out your government, Lazarus. You are a laughing stock.
4th Edit: Mall will always be the best Dali. I hope none of you forget it.
