[title]New Satellite Blues
[desc]The @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ Aeronautics and Space Administration (@@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA) is currently reviewing proposals for a new flagship satellite project. Operating under a limited budget, debate within the @@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA on which proposal to choose has become so intense that recent fight occurred resulting in thousands of @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ in damage to pocket protectors, calculators, and glasses. Agency heads have therefore deferred to you to decide which project should be chosen.
[validity]must be space active nation
[option]"This isn't rocket science!" states @@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA astronomer, @@RANDOMNAMEMALE@@, bow-tie still ruffed and glasses askew from the recent funding fight. "@@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA needs to create wonder in @@DEMONYMPLURAL@@ young and old alike, while also performing cutting edge science. My proposed space telescope, Bubble, is the ideal tool for this. Think of what pictures it could take: supernovas in the process of erupting, crystal-clear images of nebula on the shoulders of Orion, C-class stars glittering near Tannhäuser Galaxy, without Bubble, all these moments will be lost, like tears in the rain."
[effect]billions of @@CURRENCY@@ are spent to take high quality photos of the @@ANIMAL@@ Nebula
[option]"I find my colleague's position to be myopic and self-serving." declares remote sensing specialist @@RANDOMNAMEMALE@@, also sporting a black eye and torn suspenders. "Who cares what's happening a million light-years away? Our real problems are much more local. Right now, man is causing rapid changes to the surface of our planet, endangering major ecosystems. The best way to understand these changes is from space; my proposed LANDSPOT satellite will be equipped with cutting edge tools such as LIDAR and hyperspectral capabilities will give us a whole new perspective on this little blue marble we call home."
[effect]if a tree falls in the forest and nobody is there to hear it @@NAME@@'s satellite monitoring program will pick up the signal
[option validity]nation must not have brought back dinosaurs
[option]"Space may hold a terrible secret!" warns asteroid hunter @@RANDOMNAMEFEMALE@@, while rubbing her knuckles. "Do you remember what happened to the dinosaurs? If we don't want to share the same fate, then the first step is arming ourselves with knowledge. My proposed Guardian satellite is specially designed to find and track the orbits of all potentially dangerous near earth objects. If we find something, we'll take the second step: arming ourselves against the asteroid with thermonuclear weapons."
[effect]the government spends billions to protect @@NAME@@ from a disaster that is one in a million
[option validity]nation must have brought back dinosaurs
[option]"Space may hold a terrible secret!" warns asteroid hunter @@RANDOMNAMEFEMALE@@, while rubbing her knuckles. "Do you remember what happened to the dinosaurs before we brought them back? If we don't want to share the same fate, then the first step is arming ourselves with knowledge. My proposed Guardian satellite is specially designed to find and track the orbits of all potentially dangerous near earth objects. If we find something, we'll take the second step: arming ourselves against the asteroid with thermonuclear weapons."
[effect]the government spends billions to protect @@NAME@@ from a disaster that is one in a million
[option validity]nation must be capitalist, must not have banned the internet
[option]"You think your average @@DENOYMN@@ on the street is going to care about any of those things?" asks the stylishly-dressed CEO of Horizons Communications, "Doubtful. Now, tell them they'll be able to load a Whotube video from their phone a whole second faster and I promise you they'll be interested. @@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA and Horizons must partner to create the most cutting-edge communications satellite the world has every seen. @@NAME@@'s cell phone reception will be the envy of @@REGION@@, @@DENONYMNPLURAL@@ will love you for it, and I will finally be able to buy the yacht I deserve."
[effect]the @@NAME@@ government's number one priority is the speed of smart phones' internet connection
[option validity]nation must be communist, must not have banned the internet
[option]"You think your average @@DENOYMN@@ on the street is going to care about any of those things?" asks your stylishly-dressed Communications Minister, "Doubtful. Now, tell them they'll be able to load a Whotube video from their phone a whole second faster and I promise you they'll be interested. @@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA and the Department of Communications must partner to create the most cutting-edge communications satellite the world has every seen. @@NAME@@'s cell phone reception will be the envy of @@REGION@@, @@DENONYMNPLURAL@@ will love you for it, and we'll finally show those dirty capitalists what a people united can achieve."
[effect]the @@NAME@@ government's number one priority is the speed of smart phones' internet connection
[option]"Don't listen to their lies!" whispers a wild-eyed stranger, while sneaking past your security. "The entire @@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA is actually conducting a program to broadcast subliminal messages straight into @@NAME@@'s citizens' brains. I've been listening to their secret transmission through my teeth fillings. They're playing you for a sucker, I tell ya! You must remove all funding from @@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA and divert it to things that do demonstrable good, like mental health services. I hear there's people out there that really need help."
[effect]the thought of funding space programs drives @@leader@@ crazy