Aeropag, Paripana
Recently, an article published by a journalist from the Uzekian Empire defamed our great nation.
Uzekia wrote:It was obvious for all to see that the decisions were wrong and that the Thatiusians lacked the physical strength of the Uzekians, no doubt due to their perverse lifestyles and their drug abuse.
Drug abuse? Perverse lifestyles? This person clearly has not visited our nation- our citizens are accommodating to any foreigner, compassionate, reasonable, sensible, and overall pretty normal. We prefer watching tennis from our mansions, sipping coffee late at night, and reading the newspaper for an hour before going to work at 5 o'clock in the morning. Perverse? I think not.
Uzekia wrote:Both Uzekian football teams were victims of biased referees in their defeats. Both games were marked by decision after decision going against the Uzekians, especially in the men's match against Thatius where two Uzekians were sent off for perfectly timed tackles that forced two fragile Thatiusians to be substituted.
Is Thatius weak? Why, our nation just happens to be in the top 3% for defense forces in the world. Would Uzekia like to see our military? I'm pretty sure the prime minister has been dying to push the shiny, freshly-polished red button. Yes, we did send our "B-Team" to Aeropag to compete in the Olympics, but that team is full of former A-listers who have competed on the international stage a dozen times and helped Thatius climb in the world rankings, reaching high as number thirty in the world several years ago. Yes, our players are incredibly fragile.
Then we have to look at our nation's statistics- where did this journalist get their facts? Yes, Thatius is indeed 43rd percentile for recreational drug use, so what? There are thousands of other nations even worse! Thatians might in the 81st percentile in the world for ignorance or 76th percentile for primitiveness, but let's ignore that for a moment, shall we? Look at how Thatius is in the 9th percentile for HDI, 11th percentile for compassion, and 12th percentile for compliance. Not bad, huh?
Our nation is full of compassionate, hard-working, caring people. Our athletes are top class and have never been found guilty of cheating or drug abuse. So what if we have a few drug addicts in the capital of Frederikstadt? The government is quietly cleaning that up as we speak.
If Uzekia wants to make bold claims as to the ethical values of our athletes, bring it on! We will gladly show you our nation's