World Cup 69 RP Thread

by **Apox** » Wed Jul 09, 2014 1:21 am

Bid thread
Roster Thread
Scores Thread

The World Cup returns for yet another edition, and The Holy Empire and Apox proudly welcome chaps from all around the multiverse to participate in the biggest and best event in NS Sports!

Finals

Schedule:
Wednesday 13th August - MD1 (1v4, 2v3)
Friday 15th August - MD2 (4v3, 1v2)
Sunday 17th August - MD3 (2v4, 3v1)
Tuesday 19th August - Round of 16 (A1vD2, B1vC2, C1vB2, D1vA2, E1vH2, F1vG2, G1vF2, H1vE2)
Thursday 21st August - Quarter-Finals
Saturday 23rd August - Semi-Finals
Sunday 24th August - Third Place Play-off
Tuesday 26th August - Final

Groups A-D will be in Apox ICly and will be scorinated by The Holy Empire
Groups E-H will be in The Holy Empire ICly and will be scorinated by Apox

The Holy Empire's cut-off times will be around 8am UTC
Apox's cut-off times will be between 6am-10am UTC. Apox will post in the WCDT more specifically before each cut-off, to give as much notice as possible.

Knock-outs

Round of 16
1. Northern Sunrise Islands vs. Antoletia (at Village Green, Barbury)
2. Osarius vs. Paradystopia (at Lime Ground, Urbanista)
3. Audioslavia vs. Ko-oren (at The Barbaria, Gwinevra)
4. Valladares vs. Turori (at The Garganaut, Dwile)
5. The Holy Empire vs. Polar Islandstates (at Imperial Hippodrome)
6. Vilita vs. Pasarga (at The Meteora)
7. Chiata vs. Legalese (at Stadium Tzimisces)
8. Felix vs. Free Republics (at The Stadium of Earth)

Quarter-Finals
9. Winner of Match 1 vs. Winner of Match 2 (at The Celebratory Stadium, Cawln)
10. Winner of Match 3 vs. Winner of Match 4 (at The APX Sports Stadium, Dwile)
11. Winner of Match 5 vs. Winner of Match 6 (at Imperial Hippodrome)
12. Winner of Match 7 vs. Winner of Match 8 (at The Meteora)

Semi-Finals
13. Winner of Match 9 vs. Winner of Match 10 (at The Royal Stadium, Dwile)
14. Winner of Match 11 vs. Winner of Match 12 (at Imperial Hippodrome)

Third Place Play-off
15. Loser of Match 13 vs. Loser of Match 14 (at Stadium Tzimisces)

FINAL
16. Winner of Match 13 vs. Winner of Match 14 (at The Royal Stadium, Dwile)

by **Apox** » Wed Jul 09, 2014 1:21 am

HOLY EMPIRE NATIONAL INFORMATION

Alice laughed. "There's no use trying," she said: "one can't believe impossible things."
"I daresay you haven't had much practice," said the Queen. "When I was your age, I always did it for half-an-hour a day.
Why, sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast."

Welcome to the Holy Empire, and congratulations on your qualification for World Cup 69! We think you'll find this to a splendid sort of country for the right sort of chap, but since visiting here is likely a new experience for you ~~boring mundies~~ welcome visitors from Ordinary Reality, some background information might be useful.

COUNTRY HISTORY
Much of the existing information about the Holy Empire (or at least the existing information available to mundies) is obscure and often contradictory, and rests on the fragmentary evidence available in the different texts of the mysterious Codex Frosticus, and what little information filtered out during the epic conflict commonly known as The Event (which in your timeline took place immediately before WC48). The basics, however, can be outlined as follows:

1) The Holy Empire exists outside ordinary time and space; whether it is an alternate reality outside the multiverse or exists entirely outside of reality is a matter of academic debate by people who think they know more than they actually do. Travel to the Holy Empire is only possible via specially built portals; these will be constructed inside your national stadium (or nearest equivalent), and 50,000 visiting fans from each nation will be permitted entry into the Empire.

2) Legend states that the Empire was founded by the Basileus after an epic conflict against an entity known as 'the Oneiromancer'. The Imperial Secretariat of the Purple Inkwell assures you that the Oneiromancer never existed/doesn't exist/will not exist.

3) Reality is malleable in the Holy Empire, and time non-linear - all in the service of the citizens, who live in a utopian paradise where everything is not only permissible, but is also possible so long as it doesn't non-consensually harm another citizen. This will likely not impact World Cup visitors too much, as every effort will be made to make your visit as comfortable as possible; reality will be largely kept stable and time linear for the duration of the tournament - but please don't be alarmed if buildings don't always stay in the same shape or place; if people, animals, and things seem to very briefly take on odd forms and/or colours; or if six o'clock seems to happen twice on two consecutive days both called Monday.

4) Geographically, the Empire consists of a coastal plain surrounding a dramatic high cliff face separating the plain from the high plateau of the hot (and alternately steamy or dry, depending on whether it's rainy season) Chaco. The coastal plan - which is where most of the population live - is itself surrounded by the Great Sea. Beyond this, there's little information on specifics. No one seems to know how large the Empire is, though it's indisputably getting bigger over time. Despite the growth in size, it always takes four hours to fly from the Imperial City to Philadelphia (the only substantial city in the Chaco). All other major cities are on the coastal plain.

5) Though the Empire is a utopia for its citizens, it does have a security force. Reality is malleable but monitored; nothing escapes the attention of the State Bureau of Imperial Security. And when we say 'nothing', we mean 'nothing'; as far as visitors from Ordinary Reality are concerned, SBIS are omniscient and omnipotent. While a certain level of chappish rambunctiousness on the part of visiting fans will be tolerated, any violence, or attempt to undermine the peace and/or security of the Holy Empire will results in immediate, instantaneous deportation without the use of a portal. Which we understand is a highly unpleasant experience.

6) There are no injuries during football matches in the Empire unless both teams consent to allow possible injuries. Otherwise all injuries are immediately healed. This doesn't mean you can't attempt to foul someone out the game, only that players can't be injured unless both teams consent. Referees will still call fouls as normal, mind. Just because you can't injure someone doesn't mean you can't foul them. It does mean that fans won't have much patience for players rolling around pretending to be injured, mind - because clearly they aren't.

TRANSPORTATION
As noted above, travel to the Holy Empire is only possible via specially constructed portals.

Within the Holy Empire, teams of chaps and chapettes can travel between matches either by steam train, giant sedan chairs, steam-powered cruise ships, or steam-powered ornithoptors. The Imperial Secretariat of the Purple Inkwell (ISPI the main branch of the Imperial bureaucracy) is currently labouring under the impression that all mundies travel by steam-powered contrivances, as chaps do.

Visiting fans can simply use the internal portal network (which we find many mundies dislike), hike, or choose one of the above methods of transportation.

Regardless of the method of transportation chosen, it will never take more than four hours to travel between points, regardless of the distance between them or the method of transportation chosen (portal transport is functionally instantaneous).

SPORTS
The Holy Empire is best known for its participation in the World Cup. It is the only still-active nation to have participated in the very first tournament, and (including WC69) has hosted five Cups, starting with World Cup 2. It has won the tournament three times. So if any nation has a venerable and ancient World Cup history, this is it.

Otherwise, the Holy Empire is not an active participant in international sporting events (typically leaving that to the Archregimancy), though it has now hosted two Chap Olympiads.

TEAM ACCOMMODATION
This being the 'Cup for Chaps', visiting teams will be accommodated in specially constructed custom-built clubhouses. Unless your team has cultural reasons for rejecting alcohol and/or servants, each clubhouse is equipped with the best bar you've ever encountered, with the most flawless service you've ever known. Because reality in the Dreamed Realm is partially constructed by the thoughts of residents, ISPI will use your team's expectations of what constitutes the perfect clubhouse for chaps to construct that perfect clubhouse for you. The servants can be whatever gender or species you require; this is the Dreamed Realm, after all.

Equally exquisite clubhouses are also attached to both dressing rooms at the various stadia - though the bar will only open after the match unless specifically requested by your Association's officials.

Visiting senior officials will also be given temporary membership of the Imperial Club, the finest private club for chaps anywhere in the multiverse - though you might have to occasionally listen to the poetry of honorary president Isaac, Prince Imperial. For reasons we never quite understand, this puts some mundies off.

The co-official drinks of this World Cup are the gin and tonic and that ambrosial mundy elixir Pimms No. 1 Cup; which is surely what all chaps would expect.

STADIA

OOC - two of these stadia date back to World Cup 2, and one to World Cup 34; I've never had pictures for them, and likely never will given the nature thereof. I have, however, gone out of my way to offer pictures of the other grounds.

GROUP E

THE IMPERIAL HIPPODROME (The Imperial City): The venue for the WC2 final, the WC34 opening ceremony (and - sort of - the WC34 final; you had to be there), the World Cup 50 final, and the overwhelming majority of Holy Empire home matches is one of the most legendary stadia in the history of the World Cup. Platinum and gold-covered bejewelled domes rise above the external purple stone walls of an extraordinary monument to sport that lies adjacent to the even more magnificent Imperial Palace.It usually seats 150,000; but for matches involving the Holy Empire (all opening round matches, and any subsequent knock-out matches involving the Empire) the laws of Euclidean geometry will be tampered with, and it will seat a full 300,000 despite not seeming any larger than it does for other matches. This is the Dreamed Realm, after all.

Important: All matches played by the Holy Empire in the Hippodrome will take place in black and white; see the Empire's roster for details. This only applies to matches involving the Empire.

Matches:
Holy Empire v. The Royal Barangay
Holy Empire v. Free Republics
The Licentian Isles v. Holy Empire

THE IMPERIAL EYE (New Chalcedon): An enclosed dome with the fans seated in a semi-circle around the ground, facing towards the large open window. Capacity 45,000.

Matches:
Free Republics v. The Licentian Isles
The Royal Barangay v. The Licentian Isles
Free Republics v. The Royal Barangay

GROUP F

THE METEORA (St. Mary's City): The only other stadium to have been in use since WC2, the Meteora is almost as famous as the Hippodrome. St. Mary's City lies at the base of the great cliffs that separate the Coastal Plain from the Chaco; rising hundreds of metres above the city, seeming to hang out from the face of the rock, supported by an extraordinary series of buttresses and pillars, is the Meteora Stadium. Only accessible via 50 great glass elevators/lifts and - for the extremely fit and dangerously brave - a narrow cliff-face path wide enough for two humans (or one ursine). It seats 60,000.

Matches:
Vilita v. Kinitaria
Vilita v. Legalese
Legalese v. New Montreal States

THE CRYSTAL DOME (outskirts of Trinity City): There's no doubting that Group F (as befits the group with the defending champions) has been given some extraordinary venues to play in. The Crystal Dome features a vast glass dome encasing the pitch, supported by the slightly eccentric lattice-work scaffold-like seating. The capacity is 65,000

Matches:
Legalese v. Kinitaria
New Montreal States v. Kinitaria
Kinitaria v. Vilita

GROUP G:

STADIUM TZIMISCES (Philadelphia): Named after the city's most famous sporting hero - who just happens to be the most famous sporting hero the Holy Empire has ever produced - Stadium Tzimisces was first used in WC34, though it has hosted the occasional qualifier since. The climate of the Chaco is famously inhospitable, with dry and dusty heat in the dry season, and wet and humid heat in the wet season. Fortunately, this ultra-modern (to mundies) domed 60,000 seat venue is fully air-conditioned. It's also a rare example of plain 'modernist' stadium architecture in a nation typically known for more florid touches; the curious thing is that it never seems to look the same for visiting mundies - each visiting group of mundies perceive Stadium Tzimisces as looking like their own ideal of an ultra-modern sporting venue. Even more curiously, two visiting groups of mundies playing at the stadium will almost never agree on what the stadium looks like, each insisting that it meets their own ideal appearance rather than their opponent's.

Matches:
Pasarga v. Rüntenbach
Valanora v. Pasarga
Rüntenbach v. Valanora

THE STADIUM OF EARTH (New Nicaea): Last used in World Cup 50, though significantly rebuilt since then - with a significantly less claustrophobic design this time around. Its dramatic design nonetheless still hides three of the four sides of the ground, with the spectacular cliff terrace built into the very fabric of the terrain. It seats 75,000 - largely because of the cliff terrace.

Matches:
Valanora v. Chiata
Chiata v. Rüntenbach
Pasarga v. Chiata

GROUP H:

THE WALL (Chrysopolis): Like the Stadium of Earth, three of the four sides are sheltered and enclosed; like the Stadium of Earth, the fourth side rises above the pitch. Unlike the Stadium of Earth, here the rising terrace is free-standing. An impressive example of modern stadium design - albeit somewhat smaller than the other grounds being used, with only a 45,000 capacity.

Matches:
Polar Islandstates v. The Sarian
The Sarian v. Felix
Blouman Empire v. The Sarian

THE MOBIUS STRIP (Magna Alexandria): Imperial Architect Jose Miguel Vatatzes reached for the stadium design rulebook, and threw it away. Despite the twist in the overhanging arch, there is no true mobius strip in the stadium design, but Vatatzes certainly gave it damn good effort. Multiple pictures are provided here given the difficulty of getting a feel from the design from any one image. These images are from a low-capacity configuration; the World Cup capacity will be increased to 50,000.

Matches:
Blouman Empire v. Felix
Polar Islandstates v. Blouman Empire
Felix v. Polar Islandstates

by **Apox** » Wed Jul 09, 2014 1:21 am

Apox National Information

Map of Apox

So you've managed to qualify for this "Cup for Chaps", wot? And now you find yourself stuck in this country called Apox for the finals, eh? Well, there's rather a few things you should know, old fruit, to make your stay here as splendid as it could possibly be. Have a quick gander down the information recorded below to make sure you'll fit right in. Rah!

COUNTRY HISTORY

Apox was founded 582 years ago by migrants from the north of our continent in Esportiva, with a large influx of people coming from The Licentian Isles from the East and from Uitbregen in the West. The capital Dwile was established in 14 A.T (Apoxian Time) and has been the cultural and financial centre every since, in it's prime location in the middle of the country, whilst also being on the coast, therefore providing an extra level of accessibility for those who prefer to travel by sea.

After war against Cyborg Holland, for the southern county of Olfa, Apox in it's current form was established in the late 460's A.T. Since then, it has thrived in relative peace and freedom, with our semi-democratic state watching over. A civil war between 550-555 A.T led to Apox becoming more democratic, and it emerged from the ashes a stronger nation on all fronts, with our first leader, Lord Winklebottom, driving through a great deal of change. Apox becamse less isolationist and joined in the regional affairs of Esportiva, our standing growing in the region so much so that the regional delegacy of Esportiva is now held in Apox, with ambassador Jemima Cafrew, Apox and therefore Esportiva's representative in the World assembly.

TRANSPORTATION

Apox has a quite varied road system, with the roads around Dwile being very well maintained, but with the roads further away often being one-track and almost dirt paths. However, our railway system, the Apox National Railway is a very good service, and is one of the most reliable railways in Esportiva. Our four main airports Dwile Capital Airport, Mandon District Airport (just outside Dwile), Gwinevra Airport and Urbanista Regional Airport are spread out over the country and have flights from many countries.

SPORTS
This cup marks twenty years since Apox emerged from the wilderness to compete in the 48th Baptism of Fire. You'd be amazed at the levels you can achieve in such a short time, with the Apoxian National Football Team set to compete in it's fourth World Cup Finals this time around, having reached a high of 23rd in the KPB rankings a couple of cups ago after becoming the first team from Esportiva to advance to the knock-out rounds of the World Cup.

Domestically, the Apox National League is the biggest league in all of Esportiva, and nearly of the World, having attained a high of being ranked 2nd in the UICA rankings in it's 15th season of professional organised play, with four clubs; FC Endeavour, Dwile Warriors, Barbury Town and Urbanista ranked inside the top 50 clubs in the UICA rankings.

Apox is also a key player in various sports organisations, the Presidency of the Rugby World Cup being in Apox, as well as the dual-Presidency of international cricket being in Apox, with Liventia being the co-President. Most excitingly, and most recently, the vice-Presidency of the WCC, the organising committee for multiversal football has moved to Apox, with Miriam Whittaker, the President of the AFB, moving post as a result.

TEAM ACCOMODATION
For this Cup for Chaps, it has been declared that the teams staying in Apox will be put up in a number of mansions belonging to the various chaps of Apox, so that they might become fully integrated with the "Chap" culture of Apox, and enjoy their stay in comfort. It has been assured that a variety of suitably chaplike activities have been arranged for the teams, should they so wish. The places where the teams will be staying are listed below:

Apox - The Palace of the Smith-Smythe-Smith's, Porchester Beach, Urbanista
Turori - Brigadier-General Huffington's Country Retreat, Exton
Northern Sunrise Islands - The Big House, home of Oliver Hurdy-Gurdy-Briggs, Urbanista
The Royal Kingdom of Quebec - Urbanista Castle, home of Althazar Veron, Urbanista
Osarius - Spencer Jean-Thomas' Abode, Mandon
Farfadillis - Rumple-dumple House, home of Vix Béthron, Dwile
Ko-oren - Ye Olde Castle, home of Quentin Foolhardy, Dwile
Zwangzug - Comtemplative House, home of Archie Dashbourne, Dwile
Audioslavia - Spencer Jean-Thomas' Other Abode, Gwinevra
Eura - Brasher Place, home of Colonel Edgar Fotherington, Gwinevra
Paradystopia - South Oldbourne House, home of Francis Francois, Brimstone
Bears Armed - Mountain Palace, home of Jim Carthwright, Gwinevra
Valladares - Richmond Place, home of Vincent Newton-Forsythe-Cracker, Dwile
Saintland - The Large Priory, home of Bishop Hector Orbiton, Barbury
The Inevitable Syndicate - Seaview over the Baie, home of Lachlan McDuggart, Barbury
Antoletia - City Mansion, home of Jeremy Ollivender, Dwile

STADIA

GROUP A

MD1: Apox vs The Royal Kingdom of Quebec
MD2: Apox vs Turori
MD3: Northern Sunrise Islands vs Apox

MD1: Turori vs Northern Sunrise Islands
MD2: The Royal Kingdom of Quebec vs Northern Sunrise Islands
MD3: Turori vs The Royal Kingdom of Quebec

GROUP B

MD1: Osarius vs Zwangzug
MD2: Osarius vs Farfadillis
MD3: Ko-oren vs Osarius

MD1: Farfadillis vs Ko-oren
MD2: Zwangzug vs Ko-oren
MD3: Farfadillis vs Zwangzug

GROUP C

MD1: Audioslavia vs Bears Armed
MD2: Audioslavia vs Eura
MD3: Paradystopia vs Audioslavia

MD1: Eura vs Paradystopia
MD2: Bears Armed vs Paradystopia
MD3: Eura vs Bears Armed

GROUP D

MD1: Valladares vs Antoletia
MD2: Valladares vs Saintland
MD3: The Inevitable Syndicate vs Valladares

MD1: Saintland vs The Inevitable Syndicate
MD2: Antoletia vs The Inevitable Syndicate
MD3: Saintland vs Antoletia

VENUES FOR EXCLUSIVELY THE LATTER STAGES

by **Vilita** » Wed Jul 09, 2014 3:59 am

A DIFFERENT LOOK ABOUT THEM
WORLD CUP CHAMPS LOOK TO REPEAT AS WORLD CUP CHAPS

It had all started so questionably for the Vilita Jungle Cats during their World Cup 68 campaign. Struggling just to make it to the quadruple-legged playoff rounds, fans throughout the tropics had wondered if the curse of being highly-ranked was going to bite their team yet again.

After a long reign at the helm, it was evident that Calaesa Mitaroka's time in charge was going to be short lived. However, Mitaroka's record of success in getting his side into the World Cup Finals at any cost was undeniable. Mitaroka at time suffered upset results in the form of draws but rarely was a Vilitan side led by him defeated in the World Cup Qualifying stage - notably in the playoffs.

Unbeknown to the public, Mitaroka brokered a deal with the Football Association of Vilita. The long time coach would stay on as coach, lead the team back to the finals and coach the team one final time. Meanwhile, Mitaroka would take Vilita & Turori Eel-Cat things head coach Nycflala Kater on as his assistant / head coach in training, preparing the former Vilitan star who had already led the Eel-Cat things to back-to-back AOCAF championships for the important role in charge of his Nation at the World's biggest stage.

Despite looking breakable with 5 draws in 14 qualifying matches, the Mitaroka/Kater duo advanced to the playoff rounds where once again, they would bend but not break, squeaking by Kericia before upending Kinitaria with an emphatic 4-0 reversal after a narrow defeat in the opening leg.

The 0-1 defeat in the opening leg ended a 41 match qualification unbeaten streak for Mitaroka that stretched back to the opening match of World Cup 66 qualifying and equaled the Jungle Cats previous longest qualifying-specific unbeaten run which stretched from World Cup 61 to World Cup 63 qualifiers.

But the Vilitan fans were used to surviving the qualifiers. It was the finals where they usually got stood up, and thats where things were different in World Cup 68. Victories over Paradystopia, the hosts Legalese and group stage combatant Pasarga had seen the Jungle Cats through, incredibly, to the World Cup Final.

Whether it was just a matter of time, a matter of luck or a matter of desire, with Mitaroka knowing it was his last World Cup Finals in charge, Kater knowing it was the last time he'd have a chance to suit up as a player as well as a coach or the players just finally taking the opportunities that were thrown at them, the Vilita Jungle Cats had made it to the World Cup 68 Finals - a gap of 48 cups since the Tropics previously contested the biggest match in the multiverse, having to go back to the 1-0 victory over Audioslavia in World Cup 20 to find the Jungle Cats only prior World Cup Final appearance.

Before the game, Mitaroka was torn as to whether or not to officially tell the players that it would be his final match in charge of the team. Sure, he had some thoughts of 'Well what if we win, and they want me to stay on' - but he'd already given his word. Besides, he'd been doing it a long time, and it was time for someone new to take the helm.

The coach opted not to make the final about him. In his pre-game speech to the players, he focused on the game. Emphasized ways to exploit the opposition, a Free Republics side who hadn't played a single match outside familiar soil the entire cup and whose fans hadn't bought tickets to the matches outside their own stadiums. Mitaroka pitched it not only as a great equalizer that would take the Free Republics out of their comfort zone, but a downright advantage for the Jungle Cats who would be contesting the World Cup Final in Atlantian Oceania's famed Lake Bekk region of Calania for the second time.

The Jungle Cats delivered for Mitaroka, a convincing 4-2 victory to bring the World Cup title back to Vilita for just the second time in its history. Now, however, after the celebrations, tours and other associated fanfare, it was time for Mitaroka to vacate his office at the Football Association of Vilita headquarters at the Tivali-Ring complex. He wouldn't be going far, however. The success of the Jungle Cats at the World Cup final had earned Mitaroka the chance to take over as President of the Football Association of Vilita, a role which he accepted, albeit it hesitantly.

As for the National Team, the days of co-management, which appeared to be over after the struggles of the Kris Wrice/Tika Massa era, may have seen a resurgence in popularity after Mitaroka and Kater led the Jungle Cats to glory in World Cup 68. However, Calaesa Mitaroka, in his first act as President of the Football Association of Vilita, reaffirmed Nycflala Kater as the head coach of the Vilita Jungle Cats National Team.

Kater would be charged with doing something that had been done just once before - lead the defending World Cup Champion Vilita Jungle Cats back to the World Cup and defend honorably the World Cup title that they had worked so hard, and so long to achieve. It took an all-time World Cup record scoring affair, an 8-7 defeat in the World Cup 21 Quarter Finals by Bedistan to pry the World Cup from the Nation of Vilita the first time around, and no one is looking for a repeat result in World Cup 69.

Some early questions have arisen regarding the 'Cup for Chaps'. While head coach Nycflala Kater has interpreted it to mean the players in his selection should be well groomed and carry themselves with the utmost of utmosts, suits and ties for warmups and proper headwear to boot, other reports of a new kind of 'breezy' uniform being forced upon competitors have mostly been ignored as hearsay until the official Groups are drawn and overview packets delivered to the Football Association Headquarters.

by **Torisakia** » Wed Jul 09, 2014 5:34 am

Hitchhikers' Guide to Torisakia

Map of Torisakia

If you're reading this, let me be the first too say, congratulations! You're interested in traveling to Torisakia for the upcoming 69th edition of the World Cup! As with most place, Torisakia is a humble and bodacious nation filled with many great cities and attractions. This guide is to help you find your way through Torisakia and what to be aware of when entering the country. Please note that this is as up-to-date as a guide can be about the nation, and some things may change after publication. This is for the benefit of the visitor, meaning you, and should be taken seriously. This guide has four main parts: General Info, Culture, Places of Interest, and Further Question/Answer. Please read these sections thoroughly, we can't afford another mess up.

I. General Info
1) Where in Kira's name is Torisakia?
Torisakia is located in the southern part of Atlantian Oceania, just east of Weimania and south of Kinitaria. Due to the Berawin Mountain Range that goes right through the middle of the land, Torisakia isn't hard to miss.

2) How do I get there? Can I drive?
Torisakia is not a landlocked country, so driving is out of the question. Most tourists travel to Torisakia by airplane, through many of the national airports, most notably Tokai International. Inside the country, there are many roads, subways, ferries, and other public transportation routes to get around Torisakia.

3) Do I need a passport or something equivalent to enter Torisakia?
Before global terrorism became a popular pastime, a tourist didn't need a passport or visa to enter Torisakia unless they were intending to become a permanent resident. Nowadays, a passport or visa is required to enter Torisakia. Tourists who do not possess such identification will not be allowed to enter Torisakia. Check with your nation's Department of Foreign Affairs for instructions on how to obtain a passport or visa in your nation.

4) What currency does Torisakia use? Can I use my country's currency in Torisakia?
Torisakia currently uses the Torisakian Dollar (T$) for all transactions involving money. Foreign currencies are not accepted upfront in most public places in Torisakia. However, there are conveniently placed Currency Converter machines all around the streets in Torisakia. The current conversion rate for the Torisakian Dollar is USD$1.88 = T$1, meaning 1.88 in United States Dollars equals 1 Torisakian Dollars. For example, say your nation's currency conversion rate was 1.25, take however many dollars in your nation's currency you have and multiply it by 1.25, then take the product and multiply it by 1.88, that's how much that amount of money is in Torisakian Dollars (i.e 5 * 1.25 = 6.25, 6.25 * 1.88 = 11.75 Torisakian Dollars).

5) Does Torisakia's national healthcare service also apply to foreign tourists?
As long as a foreign tourist does not have any current pending legal action against them, Torisakia's national healthcare service is available for free to them. No strings attached (unless you need stitches, of course).

II. Culture
1) What are people from Torisakia called? What languages are spoken in Torisakia?
People from Torisakia are called 'Torisakians'. Torisakia is a multilingual nation, speaking languages such as Native Torisakian, English, Swedish, Norwegian, Finnish, etc., however English is the most popular language. If you can speak basic English, you can communicated with the Torisakians. The only language not welcome in Torisakia is Danish, because Danish is spoken in Denmark. Torisakia hates Denmark.

2) What is the major religion in Torisakia? Is my religion allowed?
Torisakia has no official religion, as it is believed that Atheism is a commonly accepted religious view. However, there are some lingering religious groups of Christianity, Judaism, Islam, Buddhism, Zoroastrianism, and many more. A popular unofficial religion in Torisakia is Kiraism, which centers around the belief that a god, named Kira (kɪər-də), has risen to create a new world by punishing those who have disgraced society with their crimes and actions, and that good deeds will save people from Kira's wrath. Kiraism is a growing religion in Torisakia, however most outside religions are accepted and respected.

3) What are the cultural norms in Torisakia?
Torisakians are nice and respectful people, disregarding what statistics on some political simulation game in another universe says, and are very unique. Most are open to tourists and actually endorse that more tourists come and visit the nation. If you need help with something, don't feel intimidated to ask a Torisakian for help. Another thing to note is that many Torisakians have Scandinavian heritages, meaning they might have some funny names. It is considered rude to make fun of someone's name, unless they have roots to Denmark, and it's considered impolite to not ask a Torisakian where their heritage is from. It is also a growing cultural norm to accept Kira as your lord and savior, however it's not necessarily considered rude or impolite if you don't due to Torisakia's convenient 'Freedom of Religion' amendments.

4) What sports are popular in Torisakia? Besides football?
The sporting scene in Torisakia is ever-growing, and it is difficult to find a sport that isn't popular. It is a general rule of thumb that both football and ice hockey are the national sports of Torisakia, both of which have multiple leagues and reputation. Baseball and American football are also among the popular sports, as well as basketball and, most recently, lacrosse. Don't hesitate to talk sports with Torisakians, unless it's a Danish sport, because Danish sports are from Denmark, and Torisakia hates Denmark.

III. Places
1) What are some of the major cities in Torisakia? Which ones should I avoid?
Torisakia has many major cities, most are spread throughout the country. Some major cities include Auerila, Yasui, Presidents City, Douglas-La Pryor, and the capital city of Tokai. Most of these cities are easily accessible from each other, with a blissful system of interstates, subways, and other transportation routes. Not many major cities in Torisakia have a high crime rate, but one city to avoid is Douglas-La Pryor, who were the target of a terrorist attack by an extremist group from the Torisakia controlled island of Gonzalez Isle last week on Torisakian Independence Day, and many people fear there might be other attacks within the vicinity sometime soon.

2) Where can I stay while in Torisakia? Where can I eat?
Torisakia has a wide-range of 5-star hotels across the country, most specifically in Tokai. Most hotels in Torisakia have 24/7 housekeeping, free hot breakfasts, and free high-speed WiFi, at moderately affordable prices, plus 25% tourist discounts. There are also great restaurants throughout Torisakia, most of which serve quality food such as seafoods, vegetables and fruits, multiple species, and others. You can also find many great cafes around, such as the Krus Kaffe in downtown Tokai, where you can grab a nice vanilla cappuccino at an odd but affordable price.

3) Where will all home Torisakia football matches be taking place?
All Torisakia home games will be played at Tokai Memorial Stadium in downtown Tokai. Tokai Memorial Stadium is located on Stanton Road just off of Interstate T27 near the CKL Hospital. Tokai Memorial Stadium holds over 92,000 spectators and has built-in cafes and restaurants, free WiFi, luxurious VIP boxes, a retractable roof, and full-brightness flood lights for nighttime games.

IV. Further Question/Answer
1) What's the entire situation between Torisakia and Gonzalez isle?
Basically, Gonzalez isle wants to be an independent nation and Torisakia keeps brushing them away like an old fart. As a result, Gonzalez isle has threatened Torisakia many times and has even attacked a major city and killed over 30 people. Although this may sound scary, Torisakia has an extensive counter-terrorism and city police forces. Safety is the primary concern for Torisakia and it's citizens and tourists.

2) Who is Kira and what does he look like?
Kira is the deity that Kiraism is centered around. As explained before, Kira is believed to be a god who passes solemn judgment on those who disgrace society with their crimes and actions. It is unknown what Kira looks like or if he even exists, all that is known is that he is believed to be a god and has the ability to kill people.

3) Will I face Kira's wrath?
According to Kiraists (followers of Kiraism), Kira only passes solemn judgment on those who commit crimes and actions that disgrace society. As long as you don't do either of the two, you should be fine. Also according to Kiraists, Kira passes his righteous judgment on every Friday. So if you're persistent on committing crimes and bad actions, do so on any day that isn't Friday, however Kiraists also say that Kira will pass judgment on any day, but mostly on Fridays.

4) Any politics I should avoid/not want to mention?
It isn't a good idea to bring up Gonzalez isle in conversation, mainly because it's led to barfights and never-ending Yu-Gi-Oh duels in the past, and you might think you're talking to a Torisakian when you're really talking to a Gonzalez Insular, since they look a lot alike. Also, don't mention Denmark. Torisakia hates Denmark.

5) Why does Torisakia hate Denmark?
Because they're Denmark.

We hope that this guide to Torisakia will aide you in your visit to Torisakia during the 69th edition of the World Cup. Please remember to adhere to everything in the guide and that it is meant to benefit you, the interested tourist, and can only help you and not save you. The Torisakia Department of Foreign Affairs takes no responsibility to incompetence in relation to this guide or your actions on behalf of this guide and cannot help you get out of prison. They also take no responsibility for any Denmark praising or worshiping you may do when inside the country.

by **Kinitaria** » Wed Jul 09, 2014 5:54 am

(OOC: This will form the basis of my RP arc this cycle. If you read any of my writing last cycle, you might know that Kinitaria was thrown into turbulence by political upheaval - well, this is the spark that will turn that upheaval into all-out chaos. More information as to what, exactly, this chaos entails will be coming in the next couple of days, but anyone's welcome to get involved and contribute to the chaos. It's going to become an "anything goes" sort of scenario, so go wild. If you'd like to discuss any ideas, please TG me.)

Premier Kucinič murdered

Premier shot dead by agent of Mizuyukian government
Comrade Lisineva acting head of government, vows 'swift retribution'
Republic in state of emergency

It is with the greatest regret that the Socialist Unity League of Kinitaria announces that Premier Irin Kucinič was killed yesterday in a despicable sneak attack perpetrated by the government of Mizuyuki.

Premier Kucinič was partway through an official state visit to Mizuyuki when the assassination occurred. It is understood that the Premier was walking in the capital city of Kirayuki, accompanied by his entourage, when he was fatally shot by a uniformed policeman bearing the insignia of the government of Mizuyuki. It is unknown what happened to the perpetrator, despite calls from the Kinitar government to bring this individual to justice. So far, no comment has been forthcoming from any authorities associated with Mizuyuki.

Brutally cut down at the age of 58, Premier Kucinič leaves behind a country that has been transformed beyond expectation by his benevolent, if tragically short, rule. He was called to bear the banner of the Kinitar people when they were struggling under the yoke of revisionism and crying out for guidance. Forever loyal and indebted to his country, Premier Kucinič graciously took up this call, and after rescuing the nation from a dangerous and subversive constitutional crisis, he immediately set about improving the lives of tens of millions of Kinitars.

It was perhaps obvious from an early age that the young Kucinič would enjoy a long and successful career in politics. The inherent contradictions in the then-standing capitalist system were plain for him to see, and he joined the Youth Communist League at the age of 17. Despite repeated arrests and attempts by the authorities to suppress this brilliant intellectual mind, Kucinič did not once waver in his ideological determination, and impressing everyone he met, rose quickly through the ranks to become the district co-ordinator of the Tirinthea regional unit of the Party.

Kucinič's ability to instil a revolutionary fervour in the heart of the Kinitar people remains legendary. It was under his guidance that mass mobilisations were carried out across vast swathes of the country, disrupting the capitalist system that was once in place, and handing the brave Kinitar people the tools they required to overthrow it and bring socialism to our nation. It was only right that he was elevated to the position of General Secretary of the Communist Party. But, in a vile and shocking action, Kucinič was usurped by the traitor and revisionist Altor Nevus, who proceeded to rule Kinitaria for a decade, and whose deliberate sabotage of revolutionary ideals almost brought ruin to Kinitaria.

Fortunately, Kucinič knew what was required to save the country. He, and a group of comrades loyal to the Kinitar cause, met to form the National Salvation Council, which expelled the disgraced Nevus from power. Almost immediately, the Council faced hostile reactionary opposition, but they stood firm with the backing of the Kinitar people, and were able to annihilate the fascist elements that sought to infiltrate Kinitar society. The National Salvation Council became the Socialist Unity League of Kinitaria, with the inclusion of a variety of other progressive elements, and welcomed the participation of any true Kinitar citizen.

This idea - that the Kinitar people should have a say in the affairs of their country - was only one of many radical reforms made by the Socialist Unity League upon the nation's return to peace, under the guidance of Kucinič as the new Premier of the Supreme People's Council. Kinitaria's international prestige has seen an unthinkable boost, with the hand of friendship reached out to the rest of the multiverse, and new diplomatic deals bringing vital funds into the Kinitar economy. The domestic situation has improved for everyone, with bold new ventures in infrastructure connecting the entire country, new agricultural technology ensuring that the nation is both well-fed and self-sufficient, and unprecedented educational reforms transforming Kinitaria into one of the region's intellectual powerhouses.

Kucinič also showed that Kinitaria will not be bowed on the world stage. Military innovations have strengthened the already renowned Kinitar armed forces, with the People's Navy in particular now enjoying unparalleled control in the Secocia Sea, enabling our trade and commerce to proceed unhindered. The nation is also experiencing a kind of unity that has never before been seen, thanks to Kucinič's brilliant handling of the situation in Chyr, which has led the inhabitants of this region to enthusiastically join the socialist program.

As vice-chairman of the Politburo of the Supreme People's Council, comrade Rosa Lisineva has assumed the duties of the Chairman until such time as a replacement can be elected. Like Kucinič, Lisineva was noted from a young age for her oratory skills, devotion to the Kinitar people, and ideological security. When, in our nation's time of crisis, the people turned to the National Salvation Council for guidance, it was only natural that Lisineva formed a crucial part of the devoted group that would carry Kinitaria back to times of prosperity. Since then, she has enjoyed success after success in a vital and prominent position as Minister for External Affairs, representing our country in key talks on the international stage. She was a natural choice for Premier Kucinič to impart his wisdom onto.

In a short statement prepared earlier today, Acting Chairman Lisineva said the following:
"We were all shaken when we heard of the cowardly attack on Premier Kucinič. We weep with the Kinitar people on this, one of the darkest days we have ever seen. I am privileged to have been a close comrade, colleague, and friend of Premier Kucinič, and it is all I can do to humbly ask for the support of everyone in Kinitaria as I do everything in my power to continue the fantastic example that he has given to us all. I'm sure I stand with the entirety of the Kinitar people when I say that such a shocking and unprovoked attack cannot be allowed to go unpunished, and rest assured that the appropriate measures are being taken. We are waiting to see what, if anything, the government of Mizuyuki has to say about this affair, but I fear that there may only be one way to respond to this senseless provocation."

In accordance with these events, the Supreme People's Council has chosen to enact a state of emergency across Kinitaria, effective immediately. All national flags are to be flown at half-mast for the duration of the official period of mourning, which shall last nine days. At the end of the official period of mourning, the state funeral of Premier Kucinič shall be held. The funeral procession shall pass through the streets of the capital city of Mi'ato, passing the Palace of Workers' Solidarity. Memorial meetings to honour the life of Premier Kucinič shall be held by each district Party committee on the same day. Full details of the official period of mourning shall be promulgated in due course by the Supreme People's Council and district branches of the Socialist Unity League of Kinitaria.

At the time of his demise, Kucinič was doing the thing that he was most passionate about. He was representing Kinitaria on the world stage, doing his utmost to raise the profile of our nation abroad. There can be no doubt that, in the future, the life of Premier Kucinič will be remembered as a true golden age of Kinitaria. For now, it is all that we, the brave, resilient Kinitar people, can do to try our best to emulate the shining example Kucinič gave to our nation and to the world. Every Kinitar citizen must be illuminated by Kucinič's devotion to his nation, eternal commitment to universal solidarity, and unceasing work to raise Kinitaria into a new age of prosperity.

by **Free Republics** » Wed Jul 09, 2014 5:56 am

OOC: As I did 2 cups ago, its now time for a short bonus RP to set the tone for this cycle. The first 2 verses of the song were inspired by a RL song from the 1960s. The remaining verses are original.

Herman Maslov's "The Multiverse Needs Us (A Universal Force for Good)" was not the only song with an explicitly political message at the top of the Republican charts. Brigitte Brisebois, a NichollsMusic recording artist, had a hit of her own warning of the dangers of the fastest rising political ideology in the multiverse, at that point in time:

Fascist Lies
by: Brigitte Brisebois

When I was young, it seemed to me that
The entire Multiverse would soon be free.
But Fascism is on the Rise
And Evil has a new Disguise.

Beware the Fascist Lies,
Fall for them and Freedom dies
Republica must realize that
We're the Biggest Prize.

Please answer this question:
What is so great
about War and Hate?
Why should we send
our boys to die
in some Esportivan Fever-Swamp?

Although they may deny it,
that is exactly what
The Fascists will do,
if we fall for their Lies.

Already, billions have fallen
for the Fascist Lies.
The Corvidae are on the rise
and now they seek
The Greatest Prize of All:
The Land of the Free.

Their agents pose as Patriots,
While they spread fear and lies.
They claim that they just
Want a Greater Republica,
But actually, they just want
A Republica that serves
The International Fascist
Conspiracy.

Freedom is slowly dying.
The Fascist hordes are
On the March,
Spreading Fear and Lies.
Millions are falling
For their Lies.
Gangs of Thugs on our streets.
Terrorizing One and All.
We Must Stand Up
And Take Our Federation Back!
Otherwise, Our Freedom
Will not be the only thing that dies.

by **Sargossa** » Wed Jul 09, 2014 10:59 am

SSM | Sargossan State Media
International Edition - Sport

In The Doldrums

Blanco Borrayo reports from Soluca;

It’s a sobering sight indeed, after those halcyon years of being one of the top twenty footy nation in the sportiverse, to see said same nation now not even making the best fifty. Sobering. Annoying. Not altogether surprising. T’is the circle of life my gentle dove. Yes, we may have been mastering the offside trap while half these nations were still struggling with the concept of fire, but now they’re all grown up and kicking the ball about with some aplomb.

It’s a reality that the FFS seem to have made their peace with, as evidenced by them noticeably not sacking national coach Ernesto Farías after failure to reach the Finals last time out. Of course it was a close run thing, only an away goals exit in the final playoff round of what had been an unusually complicated qualification campaign kept the Corsairs out. And Farías’ status as an honest-to-goodness national sporting legend doesn’t exactly hurt his case either. But he’s now facing a rebuilding process with international stalwarts of the calibre of Alejandro Echeverría, Sebastián Canteros, Lucas Ramís and Mauro Fernández all deciding to call it a day and others like Ezequiel Medrán, Rodrigo Defederico and Federico Ferreyra comfortably the wrong side of thirty.

It’s a challenge the veteran coach has seemingly embraced. In fact, if this is indeed his last campaign, it looks like he’s intending to go out swinging. Farías took his newly named squad away from the media scrum of Soluca to a training camp hidden away in the CNCR for a series of three preparation matches. Out went the 4-2-3-1 formation, long in vogue with much of the SuperLiga, and in came a much more offensive 3-4-3. West Kovanel were blown away 7 – 0 and Upper Timonium were similarly stuffed 5 – 0 as the high tempo, relentless pressing game was unveiled. Although those hefty wins may be something of a smokescreen for a strategy that, despite the hard work of fitness guru Sergio Castellanos, takes a mental and physical toil and offers up plenty of space for an opponent to exploit. The 4 – 2 win over Lussolavizzovia in the final match of the training camp showed glimpses of those weaknesses. But we’ll quietly draw a veil over that.

Pressing is the essence of the game, pressuring the opposition into an error then breaking with both pace and numbers. The experienced Matías Sosa looks likely to anchor the defence with Lucena and Jacinto either side. Behind them Farías has taken the bold decision to drop Ezequiel Medrán in favour of Armando Abad, quicker off his line and thus better suited to the sweeper keeper role. The coach has used a number of midfield options in the CNCR but when the qualification campaign proper gets underway the experienced Defederico is likely to get the nod alongside the more defensive minded Escobar. Cristiano Damían, as a converted fallback, provides stability on the right while Cifuentés is a willing runner down the left. In Sargossa we don’t believe the era of the traditional centre forward is dead, which is why Stefano Bustos forms the focal point of the attack, with the trickier Quinteros and Noyola playing off him. That being said, there is also the option of Bustos being replaced by Ivan Ávila in the increasingly fashionable ‘False-9’ role. While the aging but still highly predatory Federico Ferreyra offers further firepower from the bench.

Despite his attacking leanings Farías has shown that he’s happy to hold onto a lead when necessary. In that scenario you can expect to see Cifuentés replaced with the marginally more defensive Abeyta and one of the forward line sacrificed for another midfield presence.

Or if the Corsairs are really hanging on Noyola can be hauled off in favour of strengthening the middle of the park, allowing Escobar to drop into his favoured anchor man position.

And then, lacking further invention, there’s always the traditional 4-2-3-1.

by **Star United States** » Wed Jul 09, 2014 1:44 pm

Star United States

The World Cup 69 Qualifiers

☆★ Here We Come ★☆

Contents
Lets Recap – World Cup 68
A Soccer Fever, Maybe?
Lets Recap – Cup of Harmony 60
The Road To The World Cup

Lets Recap – World Cup 68

Remember World Cup 68? Well, World Cup 69 is just around the corner, and once again the Stars are going for it. In the 68th World Cup the odds seemed against Star United States, but after the first match day the odds became in favor, but then towards the end – against.

Starian Matches in the World Cup 68 – Qualifying Stage
1. March 24, 2014: @ Carialus – Won 2 : 3
2. March 25, 2014: @ New Mumford – Won 1 : 2
3. March 26, 2014: v. New South Aqumland – Tied 2 : 2
4. March 27, 2014: @ Aritian – Won 2 : 4
5. March 28, 2014: v. The Inevitable Syndicate – Tied 1 : 1
6. March 29, 2014: @ Astrograth – Tied 1 : 1
7. March 30, 2014: v. The Royal Barangay – Lost 3 : 4
8. April 2, 2014: v. Carialus – Tied 4 : 4
9. April 3, 2014: v. New Mumford – Won 6 : 1
10. April 4, 2014: @ New South Aqumland – Tied 3 : 3
11. April 5, 2014: v. Arititan – Won 2 : 1
12. April 6, 2014: @ The Inevitable Syndicate – Tied 2 : 2
13. April 7, 2014: v. Astograth – Lost 0 : 1
14. April 9, 2014: @ The Royal Barangay – Lost 6 : 3

Star United States dreamt high, especially, when they managed to reach the top of the group standings and stay there for a while, and that’s when everything went wrong.
Star United States looks at the 69th World Cup as a new opportunity to create history, and maybe make it past the qualifying stage.

A Soccer Fever, maybe?

Ever since the 68th World Cup ended and Star United States being invited to the Cup of Harmony 60, the state has boomed with soccer, with many stadiums and complexes designed and built, where some of the World Cup Qualifying Matches will take place. There are a total of 13 major soccer (related) stadiums or complexes throughout Star United States, which can be found below:

Stadium Name, Location (Year Built)
1. Star Stadium, City of Star (2012)
2. Star Athletic Complex Center, City of Star (2012)
3. Waterside Athletic Complex Center, Riverside City (2013)
4. Stadium of Jackson, City of Jackson (2013)
5. The Golden Stadium, Golden City (2013)
6. Five-Point Stadium, Lake Star (2014)
7. Northern Ridge Athletic Complex Center, Northern Ridge (2014)
8. The Eastern Stadium, City of Fredericksburg (2014)
9. The Pixe Stadium, Pixe City (2014)
10. The Sunrise Stadium, Woodbed City (2014)
11. Estadio Lado del Oceano, SeaShore City (2014)
12. The Sunset Stadium, Hery City (2014)
13. Estadio Estrella, City of Star (2014)

Lets Recap – Cup of Harmony 60

Following the World Cup 68 Qualifying Stage, the Cup of Harmony 60 was hosted in Kinitaria and Kazamatsuri. As the team of Star United States arrived to Star United States after being defeated by the Royal Barangay 6 to 3, the received their invitation the 60th World Cup. Star United States, along with 29 other teams, were invited to this event – plus the two hosts. Kinitaria, Kazamatsuri, The Archergimacy, Farfadillis, The Inevitable Syndicate, Equestrian States, Ko-oren, Apox, Zwangzug, New Monteral States, Astograth, West Angola, Kandorith, Taeshan, Jeru FC, Ossidiacqua, Alabie, Bears Armed, Chiata, Brenecia, Gregoryisgodistan, Cosumar, Armakistan, Kalumba, Nexxus Drako, The Sarian, Zenic, Star United States, HopNation, Yttribia, Schiavonia, and Electrum were all participated in this event.

Groups A through D played in Kinitaria, while groups E through H played in Kazamatsuri.

Group A: Kinitaria, Ossidiacqua, Gregoryisgodistan, Schiavonia
Group B: Equestrian States, Jeru FC, Chiata, Zenic
Group C: The Inevitable Syndicate, Zwangzug, Kalumba, The Sarian
Group D: Apox, West Angola, Brenecia, Electrum
Group E: Kazamatsuri, Taeshan, Bears Armed, Nexxus Drako
Group F: The Archregimacy, Kandorith, Albaie, Star United States
Group G: Ko-oren, New Montreal States, Armakistan, HopNation
Group H: Farfadillis, Astograth, Cosumar, Yttribia

Group Stage contain a total of 32 teams, and just like any other tournament – 16 moved on, and 16 got eliminated. Kinitaria, Gregoryisgodistan, Jeru FC, Equestrian States, The Inevitable Syndicate, Kalumba, Apox, Brenecia, Taeshan, Kazamatsuri, Kandorith, The Archregimancy, Ko-oren, HopNation, Farfadillis, and Astograth all advanced to the Round of 16, while the others went home. At the Round of 16, Equestrian States were eliminated by Kinitaria on penalties (3 : 3; 3 : 3 a.e.t; 3 : 1 pen.) ; Brenecia was eliminated by the Inevitable Syndicate(1 : 0); Jeru FC was eliminated by Gregoryisgodistan during the extra time (0 : 0; 1 : 2 a.e.t); Apox was eliminated by Kalumba (0 : 0; 1 : 1 a.e.t; 4 : 3 pen.); Ko-oren eliminated Astograth (3 : 0); Taeshan was eliminated by Taeshan (0 : 2); Kazamatsuri eliminated Kandorith (1 : 2), and HopNation was eliminated by Farfadillis (1 : 0).

In the Quarter-Finals: The Archregimancy won 1 : 0 over Ko-oren; Kazamatsuri lost 3 : 5 against Farfadillis; Kinitaria lost 0 : 1 against The Inevitable Syndicate, and Gregoryisgodistan won over Kalumba with the 0 : 0 on regulation time, 0 : 0 after the extra time, and 4 : 3 on penalties.

In the Semi-Finals, The Archregimancy won 2 : 1 against Farfadillis, and The Inevitable Syndicate won 0 : 0 (2 : 1 a.e.t) against Gregoryisgodistan. Farfadillis won the third place match against Gregoryisgodistand (2 : 1), and The Archregimancy won the Cup of Harmany against The Inevitable Syndicate to the score of 1 : 0.

The Road To The World Cup – International Friendlies

Chaos hit the World. When? When there was no bid anywhere to host the 69th World Cup. Nobody knew what to do! Later on, Apox and The Holy Empire stepped in onto the plate to save the day. So, with the World Cup cycle delayed, and the Baptism of Fire elongated to halfway to July, so the National Soccer Association took the liberty to set up friendly matches during the month of June.

A total of 13 friendlies were playing during the month of June. The opening match of the Stars’ Road to the World Cup was played at the Star Stadium on June 4, 2014 against San Jose Guayabal. The rivals of Star United States were victorious with a score of 1 to 3. Star United States played San Jose Guayabal in a firnedly on the 5th of March, prior to the World Cup 68, where Star United States lost 1 to 3 in the same venue.

The second match was played in Gloriax, at an unknown location on June 6, 2014, where Star United States won to the score of 1 to 2. On June 10, 2014 Gloriax came back for revenge, playing the third friendly match at the Golden Stadium in Star United States, and both teams tied 1 to 1.

The fourth friendly took place, on June 14, 2014, at the Rhizome Arena in HopNation, where the game was tied 3 to 3. On June 16, 2014 these two teams met again at the Stadium of Jackson in Star United States, where Star United States won 2 to 1 against HopNation.

Star United States gave Patistan a visit on June 18, 2014 at an unknown location, where both teams tied, each having one goal in favor. Star United States was hosted by, a fairly new country in the world of sports, Evariam. Both teams tied 1 to 1 at the Shimshon H. Keder Stadium on June 19, 2014. Star United States faced the Western European Republic at the Five-Point Stadium, where the hosts (Star United States) won 2 to 0. On June 22, 2014 at the Five-Point Stadium, Star United States faced Evariam once again, expect that this time there was no tie, meaning Star United States won with the score 1 to 0.

On June 24, 2014, Star United States fell to the hands of McKleigh at the McKleigh City Coliseum, losing to the score of 2 to 1. Back in Star United States on June 25, 2014, Star United States faced Red Blackiland at the Star Stadium. Star United States scored 5 goals, and Red Blackiland scored 2 of them. The next day on June 26, 2014 Star United States hosted Felix at the Golden Stadium, where the match ended with no goals scored, 0 to 0.

In the last friendly match of June, Star United States hosted Atanatos, winning 4 : 3 at the Star Stadium in Star United States on June 29, 2014.

The Star United States National Soccer Association, also opened eight dates during the month of July for friendlies, all leading up to the final of the Baptism of Fire of this cycle. Today the third of these matches was concluded.

On July 5, 2014 Star United States hosted Estenia at the Star Stadium in City of Star. Star United States won to the score of 4 : 2. The second match was played on July 8, 2014. Where Star United States faced Wolfenia at the Stadium of Jackson, and won to the score of 3 : 0. Today, Star United States travelled to San Jose Guayabal and faced them at the Estadio Cuscatlán – San Jose Guayabal won to the score of 2:0.

The next match will be placed at the Five-Point Stadium on July 10, 2014: Star United States v. Nova Anglicana.

by **Sandwich Territories** » Wed Jul 09, 2014 4:00 pm

A Chance Renewed, Perhaps?

Right back where they started right before the VIII Olympiad, the Royals look to rebound back, regain their rank, and even make it past the first playoff.
Also, you and I get to wax nostalgic.

Written by: Ennius Rezník

PORT TRADAIL -- It will be harder than usual for the Royals to accomplish their goals, and considering the recent form of the Sandwich Territories FA in the World Cup, that should be a sign to jump ship. However, the Sandwichian FA, now in the orange and blue kits, is more confident than ever. Even with the qualifying process more difficult than ever before, there is a sense of renewal of victory in the air, as the Royals will have to win their group to even have a chance at making it to the knockout rounds.

"What is the reason for such hope", you may ask. Why should we believe in this bunch of lovable idiots? Well, it is simple. This team is a team unlike any other in the sense that, the World Cup rookies and the veterans of this tournament alike all have more potential and confirmed skill than any other team of previous tourneys. For once, there is a true sense that this "cup for chaps" is the closest that the Sandwichians will get to the finals so far. In a way, the new setup benefits the Sandwichians; a national side that is known for stabbing better nations in the back and taking 1st or 2nd undeservedly. Now, the Royals are more talented, more experienced, and most importantly: more prepared.

You may have even more questions though. "If they are so good, why are they ranked 68th, dumbass?" is one I have personally gotten quite a bit. However, anyone should be able to look back and notice the lack of invitations to things such as the Cup of Harmony recently, and instead playing (and making it to the finals and losing) in the Runner Cup; which does not help the rank of the Sandwichians. However, their performances in these non-ranked tournaments is what leads me to personally believe that the Sandwichians can finally make it to the knockout stages.

Now you can all stop calling me a dumbass.

This is an FA that, if they perform to their level of talent that they have shown, can set a new high-point for the Sandwich Territories. Call it what you want (I like to refer to it as the upcoming Golden Age of Sandwichian Football). What makes this situation better though, is that this is a squad that has plenty more games to hone their skills and come together (if they really need to; this squad has always been trained around the same core curriculum for 20 years now). There will be upcoming challenges for the Sandwich Territories, including ones outside of the World Cup and (possibly) the Cup of Harmony, including a game against the nation that always seems to get in the Sandwich FA's way (1-2 wins for the Royals, though...maybe), Osarius. In fact, in this moment of looking to future glory, it can be helpful to look back to the past greats of Sandwichian football.

"I’ve always been told… I’m too small, I’m not big enough… I’m not fast enough. I don't have what it takes. To be the best and stay there, sweat is necessary. The Sandwichian greats of soccer always had their hills, never being comfortable, with just good enough. I prepare so no one can take what is mine, no one can replace my mind, my heart. Saunders inspired me, and now our (Sandwichian football league's) biggest prize, bares his name. I’m older; of course I’m older, that’s the beauty of it. 16 years plus, different level of wisdom, different level of understanding, different level of punishment. I wanna live LOOONG after my records have fallen, long after my rings have tarnished. And whatever you got to do, to make sure you chase your legacy every second of your life. Will you be remembered, how would you be remembered, why wouldn't you fight for the greatest achievement ever? Leave…Your…Mark…" - November 2012

Why not remember our first ever win against Shadowbourne? The early success still going strong, even now? Sure, we might have lost to The Inevitable Syndicate in that Quarter-finals Baptism of Fire (and look where they are now), but the spirit still remains in tact. This a team that must conquer or die. We shall see how far the Sandwichians go in their quest for footballing glory, and through their campaign, we shall support through the good times and the bad times. From everyone here at SBC, good luck to the Sandwichian FA, and we hope that the tourney is the best to date.

by **West Angola** » Wed Jul 09, 2014 5:17 pm

The West Angolan Tourism Ministry Proudly Presents:

A Visitor's Guide to West Angola

Section 1: The Provinces
West Angola is divided into fifteen provinces, and travel is allowed unrestricted between thirteen of them. See below for a quick overview as to travel restrictions throughout the country:

Section 1.1: Travel Restrictions
The red areas are the thirteen provinces with no restrictions on travel. Feel free to come and go between them as you will during your stay in our country. The two green areas have separate restrictions on travel:

Cabinda- Cabinda is occupied by the West Angolan military after a civil war consumed that nation. Queen Anna, benevolent ruler of our great nation, did not ignore the plight of her former province, and sent a peacekeeping force to restore order in that nation and stop the activities of the brutal warlords that threatened to exterminate all life in that nation as they battled for dominance. As Cabinda's civil war was propagated by its government following the assassination of its President, there is little hope that order can be restored in Cabinda without a continuing West Angolan presence, and as such the military will remain there indefinitely. Travel to and within Cabinda is largely restricted except with the official permission of Queen Anna, her designated surrogate, the Prime Minister, or Governor-General David Righnor. If you wish to visit Cabinda during your stay in West Angola, please petition the Queen's office via your local embassy or the Office of Foreign Affairs for those nations without an embassy in West Angola. Should your petition be granted, present your Civilian Travel Allowance (CTA) to the security officials upon departure, and be prepared to do so again upon arrival in Cabinda. Currently, CTA's are limited to a three-day period, and extensions are granted only by the Governor-General with the assertion that your presence serves to directly advance the security of the area. NO EXCEPTIONS.

Malanje- Travel to and within Malanje is permitted, but due to the presence of various extremist groups from the Bantu Tribe, all civilian groups MUST be accompanied by qualified security personnel at a ratio of one guard for every three civilians or higher. The West Angolan military is happy to provide these personnel to any persons wishing to visit the area, but those wishing to bring private security or bodyguards are welcome to do so. However, these personnel must be certified by the military to have the necessary qualifications to protect civilians from attacks. To certify a non-military guard, have them meet with a military representative at the local office of the War Ministry, located in every provincial capital, at least ten days prior to departure to undergo the necessary testing. Within Malanje, visitors are highly encouraged to confine their explorations to established settlements and military bases during their stay in Malanje, as dozens of Bantu terrorists remain at large, despite efforts by our military and the Bantu tribe to halt their activities, and while security personnel can provide some level of protection, we cannot guarantee your safety if you leave established "safe zones."

Benguela-The small yellow zone on the western coast is the only place in West Angola where travel is expressly forbidden. The city of Benguela was targeted fifty years ago by Robert IV, the mad leader of the Victory States of Korea, with a biological missile which exterminated 70% of the people there and left the city a biohazard. While it has been fifty years, the missile was designed to affect a small area with a high concentration of toxins. Several of those toxins remain in the soil and water of the area, and cleanup on the site continues. The only persons permitted to travel to Benguela are official members of the cleanup crew and government scientists conducting research on the soil, water, and air of the area. Those wishing to learn more about the Korean War, the Benguela Strike, and the courage of the surviving occupants of the city, as well as the role the site played in the first zombie uprising can visit the Benguela Museum in Luanda, a truly enlightening and educational experience.

Section 1.2: Unrestricted Travel Areas

Namibe- The southernmost province of West Angola, and also the location of the capital city which bears its name, Namibe is a sunny province with an extensive sea trade and a large agricultural district to the north of the city of Namibe. Within the city, visitors can take advantage of the state-of-the-art intracity mass transit system of elevated railways as they make their way around to the many sights to be seen in the bustling capital city. For further information on the city of Namibe itself, pick up a visitor's guide to the city at the tourism kiosk in the airport. Namibe's agricultural district is the pride of West Angola, a masterpiece of climate engineering and development, in addition to providing a stable food source for the majority of the southern part of the country. If you find yourself having accomplished the arduous task of seeing all there is to see in Namibe itself, visitors are encouraged to take a tour of the Gregon Climate Development Lab, situated in the middle of the agricultural district and providing a source for dozens of new green technologies that continue to slash carbon emissions and improve the quality of life for West Angolan citizens everywhere.

Cunene, Huila, and Cuando Cubango- The southeastern provinces of our country offer some of the most picturesque views in the country, Bicaur and Mupa National Parks include and are set among miles of open savannah, split occasionally by rolling hills and rivers that provide life-giving water to members of the endangered species Angolan Tiger and a host of other animals, including elephants, lions, and Great Savannah Beast, a cow-like creature native to the region. First on any traveler's list on a visit to this area is the national parks in Cunene and Huila (mentioned previously), as well as nature preserves in Cuando Cubango where members of the Interior Ministry continue the struggle to reintroduce the Painted Hunting Dog, and the area showcases some of the best examples of Montane Forests in the region. While there are some municipalities in Cuando Cubango, the main attractions are in the vibrant flora and fauna that characterizes the province. Visitors are encouraged to stay the night in one of the fine hotels found in the provincial capital of Menongue and head out with a tour group in the daytime to ensure they get the most of what the area has to offer. While individual exploration is not prohibited, some hidden treasures are known only to the natives who run the tours, and the chance of missing a once-in-a-lifetime moment is too high for many to ignore!

Benguela and Canza Sul- Between the two major cities of West Angola, the coastline offers scenic vistas along the lines of those found further south, as well as a bustling nightlife in the city of Lobito. While only a minor suburb prior to the Korean War, Lobito's population exploded with refugees from Benguela, many of whom settled in the city, turning it into the third-largest city in West Angola almost overnight. The city's economy boomed, and the mix of small-town and large-city mentality offers a rare mix of hospitality and accessibility. While proposals to change the city's name to New Benguela have been routinely proposed, they have never gained much weight as the refugees have assimilated into the larger community. When traveling between Namibe and Luanda, many travelers stop and spend the night (or even an extra day on their trip) in Lobito, as while rail service is offered with a high-speed route between the two cities that completes the trip in just under five hours, the tourism appeal and entertaining nightlife Lobito offers make it an enticing stopping point for the majority of travelers. Between the breathtaking views of the beach and the ocean on the way, and the excitement waiting at the halfway point, traveling through Benguela and Canza Sul is an unforgettable experience.

Bengo, Zaire, Canza Norte, and Uige- While most visitors to the northern part of West Angola confine their stay to Luanda, there is no shortage of memories waiting in the surrounding provinces. One of the biggest attractions of the area is Blyrtown, the oldest city in West Angola. Founded by Portuguese explorers five hundred years ago as Saõ Salvador, the city was captured by General Eston Blyr, one of the leaders of the revolution that birthed our nation, and renamed Blyrtown in his honor. Another area of some history is the Uige Province, which once formed the centerpiece of the powerful Bakongo Kingdom. During the revolution, the Bakongo formed several units of General Blyr's army, just as the Bantu did for Peter Sien, and the tribe still maintains a presence in the area. While traditionally distrusting towards outsiders, the Bakongo offer minimal tours of their areas as well as information about their way of life. Should you wish to schedule such a tour, go to www.wa.bakongorelationsmin.gov and click on the page titled "Arrange a Tour." The history of the northern region has been called West Angola's "fifth major resource" and those who take the chance to take it in certainly agree!

Luanda- The unofficial "second capital" of West Angola, Luanda is the second-largest city in the country and was the seat of Parliament during the early years of the nation's existence. King Sien established his capital in Namibe, where his power base was already secure, and placed Parliament in Luanda to maximize his own authority. After Sien's execution and replacement by King Jan I, the Parliament moved to Namibe to reflect their increased authority under the Second Constitution, and while Luanda remained a central city to West Angola's growth as a nation, especially when it became the headquarters of Army Group North during the Congo War, it never regained the governmental status it held when it was the seat of Parliament. Despite that, Luanda has grown into the economic center of West Angola, hosting the nation's largest stock exchange and several of the nation's most affluent businessmen. With a friendly rivalry with southern Namibe in all things from sports to tourism, expect to find many tongue-in-cheek products demeaning Namibe (and vice versa) on your trip to Luanda.

Huambo and Bie- Perhaps not-so-affectionately known as "flyover country," Huambo and Bie still have lots of excitement in store for the willing visitor. In striking contrast to the coastal areas, the climate of Huambo, situated in the highlands of the country, combines a large metropolitan area (which belies the nickname) with a cool climate that offers a welcome break for the sometimes oppressive humidity of the southwest. Bie, meanwhile, is the breadbasket of the nation, partnering with Namibe to supply the nation with a steady supply of food and allow West Angola to maintain its role as a major exporter in the region. Among the crops grown in Bie, the sugar cane and coffee of the region are famous for their rich flavor and widespread popularity. The city of Huambo makes an excellent base from which to explore the area, and while they may have a slight conflict of interest, Bie's farmers are certainly correct when they say you haven't lived until you've had home brewed Bie Coffee with a cube of the local sugar.

Section 2: The Culture
Section 2.1: The Language

Owing to its colonial roots, the main language of West Angola is Portuguese. However, several other languages have a strong base among the population due to various factors in West Angola's history. The influence of Germany in West Angola's successful bid for independence left a strong German presence in the country, both culturally and linguistically, but the most substantial change by a single individual came from West Angola's first King, Peter Sien. Sien, despite being King of West Angola, made no secret of his Polish ancestry, and during the Civil War many of his supporters began observing Polish cultural traditions, many of which survive even to this day. One of the most public examples of this is Jan Pawel, a Polanization of the English name John Paul, one of the coaches of the national football team and a star player for that team in his younger years. A moderately-sized minority of English and Spanish speakers, as well as traditional tribal languages among the Bantu and Bakongo, still exist within West Angola, but translation dictionaries are available for all the major languages of West Angola at the Ministry of Tourism in Namibe, as well as embassy's across the city. Should you require additional assistance, speak with a designated Foreign Relations Officer, stationed at all major airports and ports and identifiable by their blue uniforms.

Section 2.2: Religion

The main religion in West Angola, practiced by 80% of the population, is Roman Catholicism. Varying minority religions, including Sunni Islam, Judaism, Orthodox Christianity, Lutheranism, Violetism, and traditional African religious traditions, comprise another 5% of the populace, and the remaining 15% consists of self-described atheists, agnostics, or those who declined to answer the question on the most recent census. For Roman Catholics, the best places to attend Sunday or daily Mass are the Namibe Cathedral, or the Cathedral of St. Alfonse in Luanda. These two churches offer stunning architecture and extensive seating to accommodate large numbers of visitors. Houses of worship for other religions exist, but none are as impressive as the twin cathedrals. Should you be requiring the services of one of these places of worship, please contact the municipal government of the city in which you are staying for further information.

Section 2.3: History

West Angola was founded as part of the Portuguese Colony of Angola in the 19th Century (West Angolan Calendar- Consult your embassy for a conversion), but broke free in 1895 following a revolution led by Eston Blyr and Peter Sien. Blyr and Sien were operating under the orders of the German Kaiser, who expected to receive Angola as a new bauble in his imperial crown, but was surprised when the pair asserted their independence. The two generals had amassed considerable power within West Angola, and remained friendly enough towards Berlin, so Germany reluctantly allowed them to exist as an independent ally of the German Empire. Sien had greater plans, however, as a native Pole who resented Germany's occupation of his home, he sought to marginalize Germany's influence. This led him into direct conflict with Blyr, who was German and supported the European nation's involvement in West Angolan affairs. Things came to a head when Sien covertly had Blyr assassinated, but overplayed his hand and found himself engaged in a brutal civil war with Parliament. The war ended with his defeat and the abolition of the dual monarchy by the new king, Jan I, whose power was sharply reduced at the hands of Parliament.

Jan ruled well through 1914, when the Congo War (known elsewhere as the First World War) saw West Angola invaded by armies from Congo in retaliation for West Angola's alliance with Germany. The defenders of Luanda put up an impassioned defense, but the city fell after a three-month siege and the entire nation was soon occupied by the Belgian Army. King Jan escaped the carnage that accompanied the fall of Namibe, however, and led partisan units from the countryside for the next three years until the Belgians were at last forced to withdraw. The 1917 Treaty of Brussels secured Portugal's withdrawal from the entire nation, and Jan used the opportunity to force Parliament to sign the Third Constitution, which restored the monarch's lost power and allowed him to make several reforms designed to spur economic growth. These reforms, which substantially relaxed government regulations regarding business and abolished the state-run coal and oil industries, were successful in prompting an economic explosion, but the additional consequences would not be seen for another thirty-five years.

The corruption and danger inherent in unregulated capitalism was ignored, at least by the government, throughout that thirty-five year period, but the Capitol Dome scandal, in which the board of Creative Constructions submitted three bids (through themselves and two dummy corporations) to handle the remodel of the Parliament House. The board first undercut itself to force out the other bidders, then withdrew the two false bids and raised their own to an outrageously high price. With the deadline to begin construction fast approaching and no time for other bidders to come forward, the government was forced to award the contract to Creative Constructions, with a healthy kickback to King Jan II for turning a blind eye to the owners of the competing bids. The full details of their plan broke, however, thanks to an enterprising reporter named Thomas Jorrel and several pints of alcohol. While everything which had transpired was officially legal, the public was incensed to learn that Creative Constructions had essentially swindled the government out of an enormous amount of money, and Jan II was forced to abdicated in disgrace. Solutions would not be found, either, as while multiple reforms were proposed in Parliament, the corporations efficiently shut them down and ensured that what they had done would remain legal for years to come.

Jan's son was elected King Jan III, a further testament to the power the corporate elite held in West Angola, but his reign was no cleaner of corruption than his father's had been. Further scandals involving West Angola's major businesses, including Gregon Gold, Western Oil, and Congo Rubber, brought public approval of Jan's reign and family to an all-time low, but the House of Jan remained in power through the next election, and while Jan IV's reign saw no more major scandals, the perception of corruption and accompanying governmental apathy persisted throughout his reign. Unlike his father, grandfather, and great-grandfather, however, Jan IV's successor did not see himself as heir to a proud economic tradition, but instead as the savior of his family's lost honor. Young August II styled himself a reformer, being elected to the throne immediately after the Old Guard Party was unceremoniously turned out of power in the biggest landslide in West Angolan history by the Reform Party, which had promised to bring the corporations under control. Once in power, however, the "reformers" proved no better than their counterparts, exercising dictatorial authority to crush minority viewpoints, both inside Parliament and out of it, and destroy any hope at real change.

Watching these events, August concluded that Parliament was the problem, and resolved to neuter the institution in favor of himself. It was for this reason he created the national football team and encouraged members of Parliament to travel to Astograth to watch them play in the Baptism of Fire. He then staged a false-flag attack on the airport to block their re-entry, and assumed emergency powers. To distract the people from this, he created as much publicity as he could around the football team, including ordering keeper Phillip Garren run down in the street and having his agent, Thomas Nasser, kill Peter Warren (the coach) and crash the team plane as it returned to West Angola. August was eventually removed from power by Garren and Luke Parrish, as well as a clone of Isaac Warren, one of the victims of the plane crash. For more information on the fight to remove August from power, as well as the involvement of a Yesopalithan member of the Chosen of Zaiden, Jack Jones, in the attempt, visit the Museum of West Angolan History in Namibe.

August lacked an heir, and as such for the first time in ninety years no member of the House of Jan competed for the throne in the election. The people elected Luke Parrish against his will, and Parrish ruled for twenty years, guiding the nation through the war against Korea, as well as conflicts with Vortropolis and Krjder before abdicating in the wake of an aborted coup by August. Succeeding him was George Sien, his Captain of the Guard, who ruled for another twenty years before being assassinated by pro-independence Cabindan terrorists. His daughter, Anna, followed him to the throne, becoming the first female monarch in West Angola's history. Anna was forced to confront the consequences of her father’s death. Cabinda attempted to secede not long after Sien’s death, and managed to defeat the West Angolan Army thanks to an unexplained phenomenon where lightning shot from the sky to obliterate key war material and block the progress of reinforcements to the front. Cabinda did not last long without West Angola’s and Anna’s guiding hand, however, as their President, Michael Raven, was assassinated and various political and military figures tore the nation apart, prompting the Queen to order forces back into Cabinda to stop the violence. Today, Cabinda and West Angolan are again reunited, as they have been for over a century and will be again for years to come.

by **Evraim** » Wed Jul 09, 2014 6:45 pm

The Daily Comet

Baila Rosenberg: We aren't out until we're out

Allegrezza de Toledo, The Daily Comet

In a press conference last Tuesday, the chairwoman of Ha Valiérèt Meudh ve Fuzéval Everayí, Baila Rosenberg stressed the importance of pursuing Ha Duvénasíma's world cup ambitions until the squad has been formally denied a spot in the qualifying rounds. This statement comes after mounting frustration with the World Cup committee over the Everayí federation's last minute entrance into the tournament, and subsequent consignment to the waiting list. "We have a deserving team," Rosenberg stated during an interview, "The results gained during our friendlies should constitute proof enough of that."

She was referring, of course, to the brilliant and surprising upsets that the men's team managed to effect against Patistan, Star United States, and Atanatos. Beleván's flexible formations together with the attacking finesse of star strikers Indamar Ulan and Taamrat Ben-Ami enabled Ha Izarayím to go head-to-head against formidable lineups from Patistan and Star United States, and propelled the sophomores to an astounding 3-0 victory against Atanatos in their own stadium. "We've shown that we are not a team to take lightly," Ben-Ami told reporters in an exclusive interview, "We had hints of that during our last world cup when we forced ranked teams into draws, but now we're really coming together as a team. Words cannot express how happy this makes me."

In the last pre-qualifying friendly, Ulan braced Ha Izarayím with assists from captain Nachshon Panzieri and Irad Tyberia FC's rising star, Yaakov Zamorski, while the much adored Ben-Ami, who ranks among the highest scoring strikers in the world on a per match basis, added an additional goal to the tally before the whistle was blown, cementing a historical victory for Everayí football, much to the chagrin of fans from Atanatos, who had filled the stands in anticipation of a home stadium win. As the triumphant men left the field, tears were visible in their eyes, and their antics became the stuff of internet legends. One particular memorable scene occurred when Ulan, Krzentowski, and freshmen Kabédé and Nikoloz upended a cooler over the head of their emotional coach, Yosef Beleván during the course of rowdy celebrations. The coach, departing from his usual prim and proper demeanor, shared a laugh with his players, emptying the remainder of the cooler's contents over a grim-faced Erez da Silva, as the rest of the team watched in wide-eyed glee.

Uplifting moments like these have set the tone for Ha Izarayím as World Cup 69 approaches, and the horizon is looking bright. This draws a sharp contrast with the state of the team during World Cup 67, their last performance on an international stage, when they suffered a string of debilitating defeats in both the Baptism of Fire and friendlies, even losing key players like Ulan and Panzieri to injuries at one point. "There's more energy now," said Panzieri, "We're a completely different team." In some regards, this is all too true. Of the twenty three slots available on the national men's team, seven of them are occupied by footballers who have never gained a single cap, including vibrant young talents like Cor City's Melkamzer Kabédé, Seraf Fiorenze's Tamir Bashzayi, and Netanya's Reziko Nikoloz.

This combination of fresh, bright-eyed players and stalwart veterans has created a team that is in equal measure versatile and consistent. Another novel development has more to do with Yosef Beleván. He became famous for the preference he gave to a dynamic, almost reckless style of play during his time with Geran Sepharros AC. This style featured prominently in his last appearance as the national team's coach, with disappointing results. However, this time around Beleván, sometimes called the Scion of the Belladonna, has tempered this with a more technical, set-piece strategy, which relies heavily on Panzieri and Zamorski to create opportunities.

While Beleván's name would elicit barely any response from an international audience, the 71 year old featured prominently in Geran Sepharros AC's league triumphs in 1966, 1968, and 1975. He also coached the team to their title win in 1984 before departing to coach Seraf Fiorenze's wavering squad following fierce disagreements with his old club's manager. Beleván's resurrection of Itaras, who were facing delegation upon his arrival, earned him an almost legendary reputation among domestic fans of football. As such, he presented the ideal choice when the UFEF began considering options for the first national men's team's coach.

Regretfully for both Beleván and his supporters, Ha Izarayím underwhelmed in their qualifying matches, bowing out early. This perceived disgrace provides a strong incentive for both the coach and the players who adore him coming into World Cup 69. So too does the unstated assumption that the Belladonna will soon retire, due to his increasing age and failing health. "This may well be his last chance," one anonymous commentator remarked, alluding to the apprehension felt by many fans and footballers alike. The urgency with which Mrs. Rosenberg and Mr. Citron-Àvilas has been lobbying the World Cup Committee seems to suggest that this sentiment is infectious and well-founded.

Whether Evraim will secure a spot in the qualifying rounds remains to be seen, and the possibility grows fainter with each passing day, no doubt compounding the anguish felt by many across the nation. "It feels like redemption is slipping through our fingers," Eliron Szirmay, the team's sweeper, commented, "And that's just unbearable. Especially when we want it so badly. We want this more than anything." A delegation of lawyers with the same fervent desire will soon descend on the host country to plea their case for Ha Izarayím, for Beleván, and for Evraim. An entire nation waits with bated breath.

Allegrezza de Toledo earned a Masters in Journalism from the Raenez Institute for Media and Mass Communications in Genesaret. She is a deputy correspondent for the Daily Comet and the recipient of multiple awards recognizing excellence in sports reporting, including the prestigious Sefad Prize.

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Comments (54,296)

by **Super-Llamaland** » Wed Jul 09, 2014 10:12 pm

Burning Questions At Transition Cup Await
Can Tigers make a second World Cup with New-Look Team?

The oldest player on the Llamanean Tigers is Justin Allen, who is thirty-one. After Allen, Ryan Reagan is twenty-eight and Jefferson Marquez is twenty-seven, meaning that the Tigers have only one player in their thirties.

It's truly a new-look team, with no remaining players from World Cup 67. That was eight years ago, when most of our current players were in their teens. Can the defense hold together throughout the rigors of a qualifying campaign? Will the offense, mostly made up of shooters with few playmakers in the starting lineup, coalesce into a force to be reckoned with? These and more burning questions make up our World Cup Preview.

BQ 1: How long can Ferguson last?

Besides World Cup 66's disastrous Arismendy Luteño experiment that some argue cost them a spot in the World Cup proper eight years before they'd eventually qualify, Bryan Ferguson, now sixty-three, is considering retirement, especially obvious when you consider that he's managed every World Cup since the sixty-third one, when he was thirty-nine. With a birthday coming up, possibly in the playoff legs, the team will be looking to give him a present and advance on.

That saying, the days of whiz-kid Ferguson the tactical genius are long gone, the team having reverted to a complacent 4-4-2. He'll face his stiffest challenge yet in turning a bunch of dominant attackers into a cohesive offense with only his wits and coaching staff, also getting old, to help him out. If he fails, look out above - you could see a can and an axe falling in New Llama City.

A related note is that most of his coaches have been with him since that sixty-third World Cup cycle, with the exception of David Russell, who came along the tournament after. Besides Russell, whose flexibility and training skills will probably keep him on the coaching staff after Ferguson is gone. But Lee Hayes and Ron Day are both in their seventies and considering retirement, and Ferguson himself probably only has a cycle or two left before he retires as well. Our best guess, though, will be that Ferguson still won't get the offense together. For the next head coach, Russell seems to be a favorite, although he's not young either.

BQ 2: Is the offense really ready?

This offense (by which I mean midfield/striker) is insanely talented and also far too raw for my liking. With nobody above twenty-six and far too many aggressive shooters with not enough playmakers, the trick to answering this might just be to profile the offense. Sturgeon and Wiggins are playmakers, Sturgeon tending to drop back a little more while Wiggins is more involved in the finish. Ford is a score-from-anywhere guy who could be effective if Wiggins can set him up enough from the outer box. Cartwright is a dynamic playmaker in the box, scoring often on corners and in the box. Masters and Brennaman are aggressive but both still-inconsistent on the attack. On the bench, Player is an all-around midfielder who could pitch in to shift the offense a little, Marquez is a spark plug, and Canamic is a ball hog whose attack hasn't improved since the Farves knocked him out of the Di Bradini Cup after five games of just running around shooting. For the strikers on the bench, Raymond and McKenzie are both capable all-around but too inexperienced, especially Raymond, who hasn't played internationally since Di Bradini Cup 30.

To answer your question, not really. But when we throw them into the frying pan, who knows - they might just survive, and if they do, we'll definitely contend for the Ro16. I'm being serious.

BQ3: The defense is "solid", Ferguson said, but how solid are they? And while we're talking about the defense, why isn't Agudieres starting every game?

Pretty solid, actually. Roberts is a great leader, Allen and [/b]Reagan[/b] work together well, and the two weakest possible starters, Agudieres and Valdevic, both mix well with the defense. The subs could be better, but the core five is good enough to avoid using them too often.

As for the Javier Agudieres/Jordan Valdevic debate, the staff saw a lack of playmakers and slotted Valdevic into a starting spot to remedy this. It would've been far easier to include a Bryan Fordham or Anthony Player in the starting lineup, but it's too late now. Agudieres, a more conventional defender, will play when the extra playmaker is shown to not be that necessary, contingent on Burning Question Two.

As for how far this team can go? In its present position, they could flame out in the playoffs. But if the offense can get together, with players so young, it could be the next step to a Golden Era of Llamanean soccer.

by **Mizuyuki** » Thu Jul 10, 2014 2:59 am

Breaking - Irin Kucinič assassinated!
Kinitar premier shot dead in Kirayuki; Mi'ato demands swift dispensation of justice

A blood red sun dawns over Mizuyuki and Kinitaria.

The esteemed leader of the Socialist Federal Republic of Kinitaria, Premier Irin Kucinič, was today brutally assassinated on the streets of Kirayuki while on an official state visit to the Celestial Empire. A revered figure - symbolic of the socialist revolution which brought about modern-day Kinitaria - within his homeland, primarily recognised for his key role in leading the people of Kinitaria against the oppression of previous regimes, Premier Kucinič's death is said to have been met with widespread shock and outrage within the Socialist Federal Republic; a catalyst for the flood of Kinitar calls for the Mizuyukian government to be held responsible for the cold-blooded murder of one of Kinitaria's most beloved leaders.

Accompanied by a member of the Executive Committee of the Celestial Empire, Sentinel Mikasa Michio, Premier Kucinič was taking a guided tour of the central business district of Kirayuki at 2055 hours last night, when a gunman, masquerading as a member of the municipal police, exited the corporate headquarters of a renowned computer parts manufacturer and opened fire upon the joint delegation. Premier Kucinič suffered three wounds during the brief attack, two of which were determined to be responsible for the death - subsequently rushed to Kirayuki University Medical Complex for treatment, Premier Kucinič never regained consciousness, and expired at 0134 hours after determined but ultimately futile efforts to revive him. Together with the Premier, four other members of the delegation were killed, comprising three Kinitar aides and Mikasa's personal assistant, Sakurai Toshiyuki, all of whom died instantly.

Initial postmortem examinations led to several causes of death being posited - due to the nature of Kucinič's murder, the task of determining a single, concrete cause of death was a difficult one. It has been suggested that the Premier died as a direct consequence of a combination of factors consistent with ballistic trauma - the two fatal shots, of which one caused catastrophic tissue damage to the central nervous system and the other, severe exsanguination due to a partially severed aorta. Forensics, in turn, were able to locate bullet rounds - which, in conjunction with other clues originating from initial inspection of the body - pointed at the use of expanding bullets, which were designed specifically to expand upon impact and thus significantly increase the diameter of the entry wound. This damning discovery has led to speculation that the Mizuyukian government were instrumental in the orchestration of Kucinič's untimely death, as the Imperial Forces are known to be carrying out an extensive survey on the possible use of expanding bullets despite the negative connotations that are associated with such ammunition within Aeneas.

The initial reaction from within Mizuyuki over the spillage of Premier Kucinič's blood has been one of consternation and horror; this event marks the first assassination of a foreign dignitary on Mizuyukian soil in the modern era. The government's response, spearheaded by the Executive Committee's terse media statement released in the wee hours of the morning, has generally been targeted towards appeasing Mi'ato while simultaneously declaring their intent to root out the perpetrator of this heinous crime. In line with Mizuyukian diplomatic etiquette, the Chairperson of the Executive Committee, Tachibana Yuiko, has personally visited the Kinitar Embassy, situated in Sumihama-dori, to discuss the implications of this incident on future bilateral relations as well as countermeasures against possible attacks on high-profile Kinitar targets within Mizuyuki, while the Celestial Empress, Asuka, deigned to come out of self-imposed media exile to offer her condolences to the people of Kinitaria over the loss of one of their own.

"The deeply regrettable, senseless killing of Premier Kucinič represents an unforgivable slight against Kinitaria. The Premier was a honest, upstanding man whose passion for his country led him to shoulder the heavy, and at times thankless, responsibility of leading his people through their darkest hours, towards the light at the end of the tunnel. In the aftermath of this unprovoked assassination, we stand strong in solidarity with the people of Kinitaria. They can rest assured that Mizuyuki will do everything within their power to reassert our control over this situation and, in the fulness of time, dispense justice without bias nor prejudice."

- Shirakawa-no-Kirino, Empress Asuka

Amidst the general chaos that has arisen over this exceedingly regrettable occurrence on Mizuyukian soil, there has perhaps been an unfortunate tendency for Kinitar elements to be hasty in apportioning blame, even as the murky waters surrounding the case continue to swirl, which leads to the inevitable obfuscation of relevant details as to the rationale and motivations behind the assassination. In particular, Kucinič's temporary successor and erstwhile deputy, Rosa Lisineva, has already led the rest of her people in an ill-advised attempt to shift all blame for the incident onto their Mizuyukian counterparts - which may well evolve into a malicious witch hunt over the course of the next few days. Indeed, Ms Lisineva, elevated to the position of Acting Chairman of the Politburo of the Supreme People's Council with the untimely passage of her erstwhile comrade, has already gone so far as to make thinly veiled threats against the Celestial Empire, implying that the attack on Kucinič was, as suggested by various subversive elements, masterminded by the administration of the Celestial Empire.

"... I'm sure I stand with the entirety of the Kinitar people when I say that such a shocking and unprovoked attack cannot be allowed to go unpunished, and rest assured that the appropriate measures are being taken. We are waiting to see what, if anything, the government of Mizuyuki has to say about this affair, but I fear that there may only be one way to respond to this senseless provocation."

- Acting Chairman Rosa Lisineva

This attempt by the Kinitar authorities to pit their own people against Mizuyuki is, at best, hot air - a political statement designed to win hearts and minds alike within Kinitaria during these troubled times. At worst, it is a deviously engineered, opportunistic plot to destroy the Celestial Empire's political and diplomatic credibility on the international stage by unmasking them as the villains of the story, while carefully ensuring that the truth never comes to light - hidden beneath layers of misinformation and willful ignorance on the part of the Kinitars. Imperial Minister of Foreign Affairs, Itsuka Ayase, was on record this morning as being 'violently opposed' to the ungrounded rumours - some undoubtedly of Kinitar origin - that have been spreading like wildfire throughout social media platforms ever since news of Kucinič's death became a matter of public knowledge - including theories holding the Imperial Forces responsible for the attempt on Kucinič's life and rumours that a high-ranking member of the monarchy was personally involved in the plot.

"I, in my official capacity as the Imperial Minister of Foreign Affairs, can categorically deny these rumours, spread by irresponsible gossip-mongers and conspiracy theorists ... there is absolutely no credence to the variously ridiculous theories, which I violently oppose. They will be debunked as a matter of course following official investigations into the matter. I urge the people of Kinitaria to keep a calm head, difficult though it may be following the death of their esteemed leader, while we undertake actions that will be crucial in bringing the parties responsible for Premier Kucinič's assassination to justice. I promise that a full and satisfactory explanation into the matter will be forthcoming following the completion of investigations."

- Imperial Minister of Foreign Affairs, Itsuka Ayase

Premier Kucinič was an inspirational leader to the masses of Kinitaria, a figure that deserves the respect of ten thousand generations to come. The people of Kinitaria will mourn his passing, and they will doubtlessly be joined by their Mizuyukian counterparts in lamenting the death of a truly resilient, passionate Kinitar; a loyal servant to his homeland and his people. Until the true perpetrator of the incident is unmasked, however, the Kinitar authorities and people would do well not to be overly hasty in their judgement; for that is the very trap that will lead to the true circumstances surrounding Irin Kucinič's death being obfuscated and defaced. That would be the ultimate disrespect to the memory of one of the greatest Kinitar leaders of recent times.

by **The United Kingdoms of Zackalantis** » Thu Jul 10, 2014 4:38 am

THIRD TIMES A CHARM?

The UKZ has attempted to qualify two times but has always met with failure.
This, Third Time the team participates, and not only are the players hopes up but also immense pressure.
Musical Sensation from the kingdom made a music video which also features her Majesty the queen and the PM and his family dancing for the zach squad.
Now only time can tell if the UKZ will qualify.

by **Paradystopia** » Thu Jul 10, 2014 7:42 am

The recent change in the Paradystopi written text to an ancient version of the modern language was posing a few problems to many members of the general populace.

"'A Cuppe fo Chappes?'"
"Yeah, I'm stumped too ..."
"'Wurled Cuppe, the Sikstieeth an Nyneth compettishioun ynthe Hoellie Empyr ande Aapocks.' I'm pretty certain it's about the World Cup."
"Or an offer on a 69 piece tea set?"
"Hmm ... maybe."
"Also who's Ellie and why is she a ho?"
"Haven't the foggiest but that last word seems to be 'Apox'"
"Oh yeah ... that makes sense but 'Chappes'?"
"Japes?"
"So, a cup of japes?"
"Only logical thing I can see."
"Maybe we could replace our entire team with some genetically-engineered horseradish mutants and wreak havoc and ..."
"Don't start that shit again ... Most of the multiverse already thought we were a bunch of weirdos and freaks before that collection of cretins in Audioslavia started making problems with Tropicorp over bloody horseradish. Every other nation was provided with high quality TCp-X1 balls for use in their leagues, they got an official sponsorship with the UICA dammit. The FLOPC received a economy pack of 50 balloons each with TCp-X1 written on the side in felt-tip pen."
"They were still guaranteed to be 100% oomycete-free ..."
"That's besides the point."
"Speaking of which, do you know anything about the Paradystopi team yet? Have they announced the squad yet?"
"Actually no, they're being rather secretive for some reason. Only thing anyone knows for sure is that Volgjsrhaad's retired from international duty."
"So it could be genetically-eng..."
"For fuck's sake, drop it!"
"Sorry."
"Next you'll be telling me that at some point in the future The Holy Empire's going to change all of Paradystopia into cheese."
"Well ... Now you mention it ..."

by **Chiata** » Thu Jul 10, 2014 8:30 am

Science or Fiction
Part 1

It was an overcast day in the early 2000s. Chiata, a new nation in Esportiva, had just been founded a few months back and was organizing its government to suit the demands of a growing and ever opinionated populous. The Department of Domestic Security, the Center of Chiatan Intelligence, the Labor Division, and the Agricultural Regulation Department were all founded on that dreary October day. Less notably, a small amount of government funding was allotted to a small government agency called the CDRD, or the Chiatan Division of Reaserch and Development. And yes, Reaserch is the way Research is spelled in Chiata. Hidden in the clauses of the Division's founding was the right for the agency to pick incarcerated citizens who have a term of 20 years or more for human testing. Only when the bill has passed has a person reviewing the text discovered the phrase. Immediately, there was a large outcry against the use of "human guinea pigs." However, after a formal investigation, the clause was deemed necessary in the case of an outbreak of a serious and highly contagious disease. That matter was then swept aside despite the large negative public opinion. The clause did prove to be of great importance in helping Chiata during the now infamous "Zombie" outbreak.

Now with government backing and funding, the CDRD was allowed to take off and pursue it endeavors. Stephan Fuentes was placed in charge of the division and was given and two story building with 40 rooms. Stephan, a good old chap (

), was a middle aged man in his late 40s. He was almost always seen with a buller hat atop his head and pipe in his mouth. He had a gruff attitude and accepted nothing but the best efforts from his employees. All in all, he was the perfect pick to be the leader of an Agency. When Stephan waw made the head of the Division, he immediately set to work and turning the rundown office building into a world class reaserch center. He made the entire upper floor into a massive laboratory and allowed the bottom floor to be created into the office space and filing areas needed to run an Agency. Very quickly, the Division was ready to jump into the world of R&D.

by **Greater Watford** » Thu Jul 10, 2014 10:39 am

After the disappointment of the WC68 campaign, Greater Watford will look for better things in WC69. Currently 103rd in the KPB Rankings, they will be hoping for a Cup of Harmony place at this cycle, or even a place in the World Cup itself. It’s going to be a long journey, and us here at GW Sports will be covering it all the way. Your GW Sports Team:
Joey McMahon-Chief Writer
Thomas Lasenzby: Assistant Writer
Lucy Mayfold: Assistant Writer
Louis Davies: Technical Analysis
Eugene James: Former international, veteran of WC67

Joey McMahon

With the squad being announced, Greater Watford have a brief period of transfer activity in the domestic off-season, with international players joining the Super League. The national team, meanwhile, will be anxiously waiting for the draw (please, don’t give us Buyan). With 24 groups, it’s likely that Greater Watford will be in Pot 4, with Pot 5 a possibility. Wherever they’re drawn, they’ll have to make it into the Top 2 to qualify for the World Cup.

A few changes have been made from WC68 to WC69 in the background of the GWFA. Alain Esporto is now the head, replacing Joe Davis, who of course resigned during the previous campaign. Alessandro de Rosso remains as manager, but has made some tactical changes, as will be discussed by Mr Davies. The kit remains the same, with the yellow tops and red sleeves offset by red shorts and red socks.

Thomas Lasenzby
Looking at the squad de Rosso has selected, it’s clear he’s been on the scouting tour of the Super League, and isn’t afraid to throw players in at the deep end. 4 players in the squad have no caps, along with 2 that have less than 10. What has caught the eye of a few, is the older players still in the squad. Razdeski, King and Salvatore are all nearing the twilight days of their careers, and yet make up 3 of the 4 substitute defenders, along with uncapped Sproull. It could be interesting to see where the future at the back lies for the Hornets, with players like Steven Shields and Robby Harrison not making it to this World Cup squad.

What many will be looking at is how de Rosso sets up his tram against stronger opposition, and against weaker opposition. Many sides are known for playing more defensive games, and against a higher ranked side, the Hornets would have to be cautious to avoid the counter-attack. Weaker sides, however, should be wary of the threat of an attacking trio, if Harris has the creative freedom to go forward, possibly playing level to Mannetti, with Peréz on the shoulder of the defence.

Lucy Mayfold
If there’s a goal for this tournament, then making the Cup of Harmony would have to be it. Looking at our record in AOCAF (0-0-6), it’s clear that we need something to become recognised in the multiverse. International transfers are one idea being mooted, along with a foreign youth academy system, but whether or not the clubs in Greater Watford support this is another matter. Nevertheless, the first foreign player has stepped onto our shores, a big stepping stone for the nation.

If you look at the GWFA, they’re trying to focus on bringing up talented players. However, the divisions with the SLF, GWFL and now the Alliance League are beginning to show. Some are accusing the SLF, and some of the Super League teams on focusing on hoarding youngsters for financial gain in academies. These claims are countered by arguments of 18 year olds learning nothing by spending 90 minutes being hacked off the ball in lower leagues. Nevertheless, this tournament will show us where Greater Watford lie in the football world.

Louis Davies
Alessandro de Rosso has gone for a 4-1-2-1-2 formation at this World Cup. The midfield has been compressed into a central diamond, with Tilder acting as the anchor ahead of the centre-backs, and Harris as an attacking midfielder, giving support to Mannetti and Peréz. The central midfielders will be supported by wing backs, who push up, as the centre-backs and defensive midfielder hold back. It’s easy to see why it’s called a 3-4-3 in disguise. At the front, Mannetti acts as a tactical ball-winner, as opposed to Peréz, who is a finisher, aiming to latch on to through balls and rebounds, as opposed to Mannetti, who has more creative freedom.

The major questions with this formation are how much width is there, and how quickly can the ball be moved. The width can be provided by the wing-backs, or the centre midfielders. Certainly, Jonny Gregor is a new type of defender, able to run with the ball, and hold off wingers. Vincent Warthon is a more traditional right-back, which makes the right channel more of a challenge, although arguably there is more strength. In terms of pace, Mannetti and Harris are known for speed, and Peréz is no slouch. Regan and Revson can’t run as quickly, so either a quick pass or a slow build-up would be necessary. Indeed, the ability to counter quickly may be vital against the top-teams, whereas weaker teams could be opened up by passing the ball around.

Eugene James
This is the point where the team meet up for the first time. Rivalries between club players will be put aside for now. Many of the players get on well, and de Rosso has created a sense of harmony that Gianpedro Dominico wasn’t able to create. At this time, you need to develop a general plan, before you find out your opponents. Working on the fundamentals is key, something that I don’t feel Greater Watford have done effectively at times.

The veterans, such as Ryan, Mario and Chris have to help the new guys settle into the squad. Nothing can prepare a player for that first game, but working with a squad of international players in the build-up of the tournament helps. If we can get the squad working as a consistent, strong unit, then qualifying for a WC or CoH place will be easier. It’s never going to be easy, but we must ensure that we get results against lower ranked sides, and take the fight to the top ranked teams.

Joey McMahon
Greater Watford will be in Group 4, and will face the following opponents

Monkeykind
KPB Ranking:256th
They were in the Round of 32 for the BoF 56. As a new team, this will be their first time in WC Qualifying. The team played a relatively defensive game in the BoF, scoring 9 and conceding 12, with a record of 4-0-3 (W-D-L). It will be wrong to write off Monkeykind, as they run the risk of taking points off Greater Watford, however they are unlikely to be at the top end of Group 4.

Taeshan
KPB Ranking:41st
The Purple Knights have had a lean spell at the moment, not qualifying for any WC’s recently. They play a very defensive game, and use a similar 4-1-2-1-2 formation that de Rosso has employed. The are a team from Rushmore, one of the 3 big regions, so they have experience at the World Cup. They will be one to watch, as they could potentially win this group.

Kazamatsuri
KPB Ranking:59th
Esportivan side Kazamatsuri are a semi-autonomous provence of Mizuyuki, one of the more experience sides. Being the 3rd ranked side in the group, they will be looking to topple Taeshan or Osarius, to get into the qualifying spots. They are one of the more attacking sides in the group, so expect to see them score, and concede goals. A team worth watching, especially given their political status.

The United Kingdom of Zackalantis
KPB Ranking:140th
A nation with some experience internationally, they will hope to recover from a few recent non-entries in the WC. In terms of their style of play, they seem pretty neutral, and their KPG rank would suggest they are the closest side to the Hornets. They’ve only declared a very small squad for the qualifiers, so whether or not their squad is expanded remains to be seen, otherwise they risk losing out to the newer nations.

Lolloh
KPB Ranking:292nd
Going 2-1-3, and now getting out of the group stages is an ominous sign for any nation. Lolloh have been very secretive in their squad selection, but were a high-conceding team at the BoF. Without a good BoF performance on their backs, it could be a long hard qualifying campaign for them, as the higher ranked sides look for some easy points.

Fnaticka
KPB Ranking:355th
They say there are no easy games in international football, but coming up against a side who were 0-1-5 in the BoF is probably as easy as it gets. One of the weakest nations competing at the WC qualifiers, it is vital that the Hornets take 6 points off of our games with them, as anything less is a failing on the Hornets. No squad details are known yet, although one would assume they’d play a similar side to the BoF.

Osarius
KPB Ranking:5th
If you look over the Northern hills or the North Coast on a clear sunny day, you can actually see some land over the sea. That land is Osarius. Ranked 5th in the world, the Hornets will be honoured to travel over the sea to face off against one of the top teams at the moment. We don’t want to make it easy for our rivals, as we’ll be looking for points against them. Nevertheless, it’d be surprising to see them outside the Top 2.

Code: Select all: Monkeykind Away Lolloh Home Taeshan Away Fnaticka Home Kazamatsuri Away Osarius Home The United Kingdom of Zackalantis Away Monkeykind Home Lolloh Away Taeshan Home Fnaticka Away Kazamatsuri Home Osarius Away The United Kingdom of Zackalantis Home

by **Miley World** » Thu Jul 10, 2014 12:27 pm

World Cup 69 preview, recap of the qualifications for the World Cup 57

The moment everyone in Miley World was waiting for is arrived. I'm not talking about a new Miley album, but about the World Cup 69. The World Cup is one of biggest sporting event in Miley World, and it will be broadcasted in many languages (listed below).

Can Miley World repeat its performance at the qualifications for the World Cup 57? It's possible, we hope that Miley World haven't regressed due to the inactivity. Let's take a look at the qualifications for the World Cup 57. Miley World was placed in the group 19 and finshed 5th with a 5-6-5 record. Miley World was 0-5-3 after the first 8 games and had a 5-1-2 record for the final 8 games. Miley World had a very defensive team, the smilers scored 15 goals in 16 games and allowed 11 goals. Valanora finished 1st in the group and was qualified for the World Cup. Octinstine finished 2nd and had to play a playoff game against Pays de Horreur. Octinstine lost 2-2 AET, 2-3 PKs.

This year, Miley World will be a little more offensive with a +2 style and only 3 defensemen instead of 4. Coach Paul Evans hopes it will help Miley World to win more games, but the smilers could lose more games too.

Top players to watch:

Dodô: starting goalkeeper, he was the backup at the qualifications for the World Cup 57.

Zezinho: Miley World's best defenseman

Ross Wallace: The captain and a really good defensive midfielder

Conor Downing: Offensive midfielder, he had 4 goals and 4 assists at the qualif. of the WC 57.

Grégory Dedieu: Miley World's best striker, he had 5 goals and 1 assist at the qualif. of the WC 57.

Broadcast

Miley World is a multi lingual country, so 13 different channels will broadcast the qualifications in 11 different languages. Every Miley World's games plus some other games in our group will be broadcasted live.

These channels will broadcast Miley World games only:
FBS (Floyd Broadcasting Service)(english)
Rede Globo (portuguese)
LCTV (indonesian)
THK (japanese)
TVP (Telewizja Polska) (polish)
ZTV (russian)

These channels will broadcast Miley World games plus some other games in our group:
MSN (Miley Sports Network)(english)
Gol Television (spanish)
Deutsch Sports (german)
FrancoSports (french)
RAI Sport (italian)

This channel will only broadcast other games in our group:
SporTV (portuguese)

This channel will broadcast Miley World games only, and only during the weekend, unless if there is boxing at the same time, they will show nothing:
Pinoy TV (tagalog)

by **Jeckland** » Thu Jul 10, 2014 10:47 pm

The Midpoint - Prologue

OOC: This is a prewritten RP line and any attempts to interact with it will be ignored.
We all have dreams
Whether we remember them or not, we have them. Good and bad, sometimes both. The bizarre ones where there is no real sense. Dreams are a part of every human life. Even animals have them. They are a part of us, coming to us in the dead of night, with the power to elate us or petrify us. They really are very strange and wonderful things.
None more so than those of our main character, our hero if you like. His name is William James Thompson, though he prefers to be called Billy. As this story begins, he is eight years old, and he lives in the outskirts of Lingham, a city in the north of Jeckland. He is an only child of Jill Thompson, who is a doctor, and Trevor, who works in a car factory.
Our story begins on a summers evening. Billy had been playing football in the garden with his Dad, and had had a brilliant time. He had just got changed into his pyjamas, and now came downstairs to the living room. His parents were sat next to each other on the sofa, watching a TV programme, but paused it as he entered the room.
“Alright Billy?” said Dad.
“Yeah”
“We had a good game of football, didn’t we?”
“Yeah, it was awesome, thanks Dad!”
“No problem. Your right foot is really getting better.” He paused. “Well, time for bed. Mum will go up with you to tuck you in.”
“But I don’t wanna go to bed!”
“Oh don’t give me that. Night son”
“Night Dad”
The pair of them hugged, then Dad ruffled Billy’s messy blond hair.
“Up you go then.”
Billy trotted up the stairs with his mother in tow. He brushed his teeth, then went into his bedroom. It was a nice room, if a bit small, with blue painted walls and a large chest for his toys. He got into his bed and his mother gently rested the sheets over him, so that only his head was poking out.
“Night Mum”
“Night”
She kissed him gently on the forehead, then walked toward the door. She flicked the light switch, plunging Billy into darkness, but before she closed the door, she whispered
”Sweet Dreams!”

by **Barunia** » Fri Jul 11, 2014 10:07 am

BaruniainSports.com.bu
The Number One website for Barunian Sports Fans

World Cup 69 Preview: The Suns for the 69th World Cup Revealed
Article by Kitty Smith, chief editor kittyS@baruniainsports.com.bu

The 25 players that will wear the Barunian colours in the 69th World Cup have been revealed today. The roster features almost all the same players from the 68th World Cup campaign, with only two players pulling on the coveted sky-blue jersey for the first time.

Head Coach Joric Ruskin, now in his third cycle in the top job, has changed from last Cup's 4-4-2 formation to a more attacking 4-2-4. Essentially, it's the same pattern he's used since he started, but the two wing players will now play more forward and wide then in previous cycles. Much will be asked of the midfield pair, one of whom will be defensive and the other attacking. The right and left fullbacks will also need to get involved in the forward play, with Ruskin relying more on his experienced centre defence to stop any counter-attacks.

The Goalkeepers
#1 Toby White
Orcas goalkeeper Toby White will once again return to the starting line up for the Suns. Expect him to play in all key matches and watch for his play in the corner pieces - it is exceptional. If he has a fault, it is a tendency to struggle when left to face an attack alone - support from the defence is a must.
#12 Adam Simpson
The Mariners goalie is the second goalkeeper for this World Cup, and will still expect plenty of game time. Less bold then White, he has a tendency to stay firmly on the goal line and stop shots rather than rush a player down. A good solid choice, equally good as White.
#35 Billy Meyer
Meyer is the back up goalkeeper. He might not get a game, but if he does expect his characteristic flair to shine. Meyer is a crowd pleaser, using his athletic ability to pull off spectacular saves. White and Simpson are conservative, solid and dependable - Meyer is none of those things, but he still manages to get the job done.

The Defenders
#2 Cesar Osario
Osario has been a staple of the team, and one of the key defenders the back line is built upon. A good defender, he isn't afraid to harass the ball carrier and throw a foot in to stop a run. His synergy with Silva and the goalkeeper will be essential to stopping the goals.
#6 Carl Silva
Likely to have reached his 50th cap by the start of the World Cup 69 campaign (Currently he sits on 48 with the Escudo Fraternal to come), Silva has been named vice-captain of the squad. A stalwart of the team, Silva has made his name as a smart defender, always keeping himself between the player and goal. As such, he is often the last line of defence, and he has the skill to make sure that last line is not breached. He is also the only player on the current squad to play internationally, plying his trade with the Yeaddin Owls of the Vilitian League.
#15 Paulo Jensen
Jensen's had a lot of game time since his debut, and it's payed off. He's been chosen to start, and will be need to maintain his good form if he want's to stay there. Jensen is a player who likes to control the ball; while precise passing is his speciality, it does leave him vulnerable to counter-attacks after winning the ball.
#24 Algernon Todd
A conservative player, Todd will take a back seat in this campaign, Ruskin favouring the more attacking Steve Magana for the left back position. Solid and dependable, Todd is particularly good at reading a pass, and will likely be a late substitute whenever the Suns are looking to just sit on a lead and let the clock run down.
#4 Dylan Webster
Webster is a young player still needing to prove himself. He's earned his spot on the team, but will need to show good performances in the games he does play if he has any chance of replacing Jensen as a starter.
#5 Steve Magana
This world Cup will be Magana's big break, as he'll start in the left back position. This is almost certainly due to his attacking style of football, with Ruskin favouring a fullback who can also lead a charge up the wing under the new model.
#14 Elton Reed
Reed made almost no impact in his debut last cycle, but that is no wonder considering the centre defence is dominated by Osario and Silva. Reed will likely only see game time when either of those two need a rest.
#22 Akio Sweet
Sweet is one of the new players on the squad. He'll cover the centre defence as support for Osario and Silva. Sweet plays for the Tildos Ravens, and was a key part of their defence that let in just nine goals last season. He'll bring that skill and his own style to this team, and expect to see a lot more of this kid in the future.

The Midfield
#36 Johnathon Haynes
Arguably only on the team for his teaming with Yohan Marris that has made the pair such a useful weapon for the Mariners, Haynes has finally falling out of favour and will not start for the Suns. When he does play, expect earlier crosses as Marris likes to score from a breakaway, and Haynes' knows that well.
#16 Craig Van Diemen
Van Diemen has switched flanks for this tournament, and will likely have an equal share of the right winger duties with Jackson. Craig is an aggressive player, and his temper has been known to get him into trouble, most notably a six week suspension for headbutting former Suns teammate Aubrey King during a league game. He's on short notice from Ruskin; any problems and he'll be out, so Van Diemen had better be on his best behaviour.
#17 Sam Winton
Winton's grown from a talented teenager to a brilliant young player. He's got pace to burn, a good head for strategy and plenty of ball skill. He'll need all of his talent as he sets up lays from the centre and takes care of any counter-attacks early. Joric is relying on Winton to keep the ball in the offensive half by being a brick wall for the opposing forwards, and if he shows that defensive capability he'll have a place on this team for a long time to come.
#21 Loren Sanchez
Sanchez had been making waves for a few years before his selection for the national team, and then he came on only as a substitution. Now this highly talented player gets his chance to shine as a starter, replacing Haynes on the left flank. Sanchez's speciality is the long cross, landing them with pinpoint accuracy off his favoured left foot. Sources suggest he'll be the go to man for long free kicks and corners from the left.
#8 Luke Cadena
Cadena started his career as a defender before moving up to the midfield. A protege` of Suns legend Lucio David, Cadena displays very similar qualities to his teacher. A bit more level-headed than David, Cadena is tenacious, always fighting for the ball, and has an almost uncanny ability to read an attacker. Once in possession, he favours a big clearance upfield to try and set up a break away on the counter.
#38 Brendan Wallace
A late call-up during the 67 campaign, Wallace has since established himself on this team, so much so that he retains his spot despite their being no position for him to fill. A versatile midfielder, Wallace will likely only play a support role as a substitute, where he will need to adapt to whatever position Ruskin need's him to fill.
#19 Emmanuel Jackson
Jackson burst onto the scene in 67, when he became the first and only player from the bottom tier of the Barunian Football League to play for the national team. Now signed to league champions West Bay Mariners, Jackson is a good choice for the national squad. He prefers to keep the ball low when crossing or passing into the box, but can lob it and also has a good domestic record when it comes to scoring goals.
#7 Mark Hardy
Hardy has been on the national team for a long time, since the 57th Cup of Harmony in fact, but has never had a chance to shine, with dedicated attacking midfielders not favoured in previous formations. Now he starts, and it hoped the experience he brings to the role will make this new strategy a success. He'll be a big part of the attack, setting up the passing game and also looking to receive a cross himself or support an attack. He's got the skill, he's got the experience. Now he just needs to put it into practice.
#25 John Bubble
The only other newcomer into this squad, Bubble was chosen as another dedicated attacking midfielder. He'll serve as a back-up to Hardy, and also as a potential late substitution for when the team need to mount an all-out attack on the opposition's goal.

The Forwards
#37 Yohan Marris
The man, the legend, the Sun's captain returns for his fifth World Cup campaign, and his second as captain. Originally coming into the squad as a midfielder, Marris has made a successful move into the forward role. He's now the second-highest scoring Barunian international footballer of all time, only 13 goals behind the great Victor Castolo. He'll be a dangerous presence in the box, able to score equally well with the head as well as the feet, and favouring a volley from a cross. Marris is also likely to rack up his goal count with any short free kicks or penalties the team gets falling to him to put away.
#20 Enrique Delgado
Delgado is one of a handful who had been making noise for a while before making it onto the national team. He's a good striker, but can be hit or miss on any particular day, and with limited game time he can be a bit of a risk.
#18 Eli Estrella
Estrella plays domestically for Newland FC, and is a major reason why they almost always outscore every other team. Estrella is relentless in his attack on goal, and if a goalkeeper can't hang on to a ball, Eli will be there to send it into the back of the net. His record is currently standing at 20 goals from a mere 18 games, giving him one of the best scoring records of any Barunian player. Expect him to regularly start alongside Marris, or to be called in to score a late winner.
#28 Jaylen North
Another striker from Newland FC, North is the youngest player on the team. He's fast, flashy, and got some good skills, which he uses to turn defences inside out. He's not to good with aerial balls, so may not get as much game time as he'd like with the current strategy, but will be another option for Ruskin to look to in a crisis.
#11 Sjors Van Der Venne
One of the fastest players in the Barunian Football League, Van Der Venne carried the Western Orcas to two consecutive titles (even if one was later revoked; the effort he put in still counts!). He'll start alongside Marris in key games, Ruskin looking to use that pace to get Van Der Venne behind the defence and in to space. He'll have to be careful of the offside trap, but if he makes it through it will take a herculean effort from the goalkeeper to stop him scoring.

There you have it, the Suns for the 69th World Cup! It's a good team on paper, but as we all know that means nothing, it's what happens on the day. The first matchday is fast approaching, and BiS will keep you up to date on all the action, as well as a full analysis of the qualifying group right after the draw.

by **German American States** » Fri Jul 11, 2014 11:21 am

Note: I plan to run 2 major RP lines side by side this WC, plus match reports, so I may kill myself of work. I may do one line one day, one another, it depends. I will also be gone next week until Saturday, so don't expect me to RP then.

The Münchewald Post-Zeitung Presents...
The History of Rüntenbacher Football

Chapter 1: Origins

The history of football in Rüntenbach is said to have started around the year 1860, when the county of Westenklippe was founded by the Kramer Exploration Company. Records show that the settlers in the town of Westenklippe started playing a game similar to football they called Vögelchen(Birdie), that consisted of the players kicking a small inflated ball, called the birdie, into a goal. It was different from football in several ways. One, being it had to stay in the air at all times, two, it could only be passed sideways or behind, and three, full contact was allowed. The diary of the govenor of Westenklippe, Matthias Kramer, details his diastase with Vögelchen:

1. Juni, 1863

Today we have had the third game of Vögelchen this week. The boys from the lumbermill played the dockworkers in what was to them a splendid game. To me, and the owners of the shops, it is purely a waste of work. We should be striving to outwork the Mannendorfers, but that will not happen if we are transfixed with this petty game.

While Kramer did not like this game, many in Westenklippe did. It is said that the town had around 5 teams, and games were competed through the year, even into the winter. However, the game did not arrive in any other counties, and the sport fizzled out over time. While the game did not evolve into what we know today as football, several of its traits were lent to other games, most notably, Rules-Hockey, the Rüntenbacher version of Ice Hockey.

It appears that the modern version of football arrived in Rüntenbach in the port of Mannendorf around 1880. A dockworker, known to his friends as Kleine Tomas, apparently on account of his size, wrote an invaluable resource in his letter to his brother Karl. This 1881 letter spoke of Uitbregen traders from the west who had brought a football-sized leather bladder with them on their voyage. After they had unloaded their goods, it is said that they taught the Rüntenbachers the basics of a game very close to the modern football.

This game of proto-football first took the name Stoßball after the kick of the ball, but it was soon changed to the name we all know and love, Fußball. The game spread up and down the coastline, seen as a novelty sport. Several diary entries from Münchewalders and Klattenhorns called the game "a silly invention by the insane Mannendorfers".

Stoßball was played on a square pitch, unlike the modern rectangular pitch of today. The goals lay in the corners, and full contact was introduced, derived from Vögelchen. Gradually, the game developed as more traders arrived in Rüntenbacher ports and shared the finer points of the game. Contact was taken out, and for a while, around 1885, the game was still played on a square pitch.

In 1887, we can see the first records of modern football, as the pitch was elongated, goals were placed at the end, and modern rules were used. The first ever football match was contested between Eisenport Docks North and Eisenport Mauer. These appear to be sides made up of workers from the port and Kriegsmachen, respetively. After around 20 years of development, introduction, and evolution, modern football had a foothold in Rüntenbach.

The Powder Keg
Part I

"Herr Steiger? Care to answer problem 13?"

Martin Steiger was awoken from his daydream, as he found himself sitting in the one piece desk in his Mannendorf high school. He looked up at the board, deciphering names of famous and influential historical figures, struggling in his head to put them in place on the timeline of Ruentenbacher and Esportivan history. His 12th grade Esportivan History class was tolerable for Martin. He wasn't nearly as good at history as he was at math or physics, but he limped through the class with a mid-level grade, and of course Kristin was in that class too...

"Erm...President Fuerbeck favored a strong economic relationship with Apoxien and Lischentia, but the trade pact never passed through Congress?"

His teacher, Frau Kirschner, sighed and looked over her round glasses. "Close enough, Steiger. Fuerbeck was blocked by a coalition of DHP and Traditionalist Centrists, a remarkable occurrence given that..."

Frau Kirschner rambled on and on about trade pacts and 1980s Ruentenbacher politics and international relationships, and Martin had the strong urge to slumber amongst his notes he was supposed to be taking. Just as he was about to take a nap, he felt a tap on his right shoulder. Kirstin gave him an encouraging smile as she tied her long blonde hair into a ponytail. Martin paid a little too much attention on a daily basis to what she was wearing, and how pretty her hair looked, and how perfect her legs were...

Martin jolted himself back to think about the lesson. He needed a good grade on the final to pass 12th grade, and pave his way to get into Museum Park University in Muenchewald, a University that had been on the fence about letting him into the Engineering program, but yielded anyways. Any bad grades and they could revoke his scholarship immediately. Half of the time, Martin thought the only thing keeping him in high school was Kirstin. They had been friends ever since they were little, and had grown into something a bit more than that. Kirstin would be attending uni at Klattenhorn Collegiate, to fulfill her dreams of becoming a history professor. Along with being half of the reason that Martin was in school, Kirstin was also half of the reason Martin was passing the class, tutoring him in Esportivan history over the weekends. Over that time in the past year, Martin had grown to like her...a lot. He wasn't sure if Kirstin reciprocated, but he would like to think so.

Life had been very different for Martin this past year. Looming now on the horizon was university, and what he liked to call The Real World. The Real World was a dangerous place, teeming with nasty people who'd rather drain you of your finances than help you, where you could end up begging for food on the streets if you didn't have a proper education, etc. The Real World was also filled with the Corvidae Scum, the favorite name Adlericht, the state news network, launched this year, liked to call the Corvidae governments. Most of the time Martin liked to roll his eyes at the Adlericht's news of fascist scum taking governments across Esportiva, from Yttribia to The Sarian to Felix, inevitably¹ with the Syndicatian Corvidae as the puppetmaster of a master plan. However, over the past couple of months, Martin's mind changed a bit on the matter. Now looming on the horizon of The Real World, given the government's anti-Corvidae views, was a potential conflict, maybe with an invasion, missiles, and probably death. He took to reading newspapers from around the country, prime for reading at his local newstand. In an international city like Mannendorf, it was impossible to avoid the possibility of war.

He had also seen...posters up in the alleys around his house. Being rather tall for his age, he could see them perfectly, sometimes having to brush away his long brown hair out of his eyes or adjust his glasses to catch a glimpse. These posters called for men to enlist in the Kriegsmachen, the nation's military, and purge the earth of the Corvidae Scum!

Martin looked at these messages with new regard. Perhaps he will be needed to help his country...but that time was not now.

¹ See what I did there?

by **Northern Sunrise Islands** » Fri Jul 11, 2014 2:08 pm

RADIO ESPORTIVA
Season 4, Chapter 1: Free Agency

It had been a couple of months on the rather confusing house of Sunrise and GAS & family. Mikoto ended up abdicating her career as a conqueror to live her life together with Sunrise and the offsprings. The Futurnians added a floor under their treehouse to turn on a proper building and now collect rent from a couple of newbies. Sadly, they still lack the money to paint it and Huelandia keeps insisting that they should host barbecue parties on top of their place. GAS' ended up replacing his Titan for a Dream, a console Glo made during a sugar rush that somehow manages to be even more functional than it should. The three kids joined a school during these months, resulting on a rather happy Dainer winning back the tide on the Dream over East Sunrise.

Sunrise, our protagonist, though by not much merit, has been living a rather simple life as a result of all that. Trying to adjust himself to all responsibilities, he somehow did not change at all, still being rather childish but with his heart on the right place. Sadly, all peace was to end...

Sunrise felt a nudge to his shoulder, waking up at the couch.

Sunrise: Oh, hey, there, darling.
Mikoto: It's been the third time this week that East asked why he can't be like you and sit on the couch, doing pretty much nothing bar errands your neighbors ask you.
Sunrise: Well, to be entirely honest with you, that's not what keep me fed, clean and pretty, Mikoto. There's another way I get money.
Mikoto: ...huh?
Sunrise: Well, there was one episode with energetics... and they quite frankly are still paying me the money of that episode.
Mikoto: Product Placement?
Dainer: Wait, wait. So that kid isn't really addicted?
Mikoto: ...Where did you even come from? Shouldn't you be at that building?
Dainer: They rented my room. To a bunch of hues.
Sunrise: ...So?
Dainer: Out-of-period Carnival.

The camera cuts to one particular window flashing lights and a loud song from it.

Sunrise: That explains the familiar noise.
Dainer: Ever seen Mangueira entering?
Sunrise: ...It's a good thing the people that read this aren't from Brazil or else the writer would be so getting many angry letters later.
Dainer: Heheh. But she has a valid point, Sunrise.
Sunrise: Says the unemployed one.
Dainer: I don't have kids and I'm not unemployed.
Sunrise: So why the hell are you here all the time?
Dainer: Because firespitting at your friend's club isn't required 24/7.
Mikoto: So, I have talked with the people at Westie's school and I'll work there as a Gym teacher. I don't care if it's a barely important job, but you're not going to stay here, sleeping on the couch all day!
Sunrise: Hmmm... how about couch tester?
Mikoto: No. A proper job.

Mikoto handed the ad section of a newspaper, walking to the couple's bedroom to seemingly read a book. Sunrise sighed, looking at the ads. However, it wouldn't take too long for the kids to finally arrive.

Westie Sunrise: Canon Westie! *-*

Westie leaped on the couch, knocking the newspaper off and landing left to her father.

Southie Sunrise: You're sure you weren't the one that taught her how to do that, East?
East Sunrise: Hey, it's just a game. Don't blame the game's players, blame that player. Plus, she's still young, right?
Southie Sunrise: Yes, but good god. You're a bit older than her yet you don't do anything that stupid.
East Sunrise: If father allowed us to set a ring on our backyard, I'm sure I would be trying to land that 720 Flip.
Southie Sunrise: You already landed it, East. On top of a classmate. From the roof of the school's restaurant. I'm surprised they didn't punish you.
East Sunrise: Well, the heads are... far from being strict, to say the least. Only thing that gets you in trouble is waving flags declaring your hate about something or someone. Or just really bringing chaos. An innocent flying move doesn't cause any of those things.
Southie Sunrise: Innocent!?
Sunrise: Kids! Would you mind? Father is trying to find a job here.
Southie Sunrise: I suppose they're not asking for couch testers, are they?
East Sunrise: Hahah. Meh, good luck, dad.
Southie Sunrise: Well, that's interesting, though. What are you going to work with anyways? I didn't know you had a degree.
Sunrise: Child Psychology.
Southie Sunrise: And a minor at?
Sunrise: Comic Relief.
East Sunrise: It shows.
Sunrise: Aha! Here you go! Work at car sales at downtown Sportsborough... Kirola Avenue, 252. Wait? Hodori?
Westie Sunrise: Uh... Who? o3o

A loud car wreck noise smashes a part of the house's wall, with Hodori coming out of a snazzy car.

Hodori: Unyu~?
Sunrise: ...Well, good to see this actually worked for once.

by **Hicana** » Fri Jul 11, 2014 9:33 pm

LLAMANEAN AND HICAÑAN PRE-69 GAMES: REVIEW

We recap all nine of the pre-69 friendlies that Super-Llamaland and Hicaña went through, how they went, and what they mean for the qualification chances of the Tigers and Mist. The Tigers played a few high-profile friendlies away, including top-forty teams San José Guayabal and Jeruselem, while Hicaña went for a more domestic look.

Super-Llamaland 4 - 2 FC New Llama

Against their best club team, the Tigers put up an intringuing showing. They seemed to play weak at first, with Jordan Valdevic getting bailed out by the rest of the defense numerous times while starting a few counter-attacks. In the thirty-fifth minute, twenty-four year old striker Eden Powell made it by Valdevic and curved one into the back of the net from outside the box to make it one-nil. Valdevic was controversially subbed out early for Javier Agudieres. Panic began to set in towards the beginning of the second half, and the normally-calm Derrick Roberts brought down James LeMahieu in the box for a penalty kick, which Powell buried in the forty-ninth.

The tide changed as Alex Cartwright was subbed in for Xavier Platona. Cartwright, in his first minute, made a run up the left side and crossed one to Peter Masters, who volleyed in the goal and brought the fans back to life. Cartwright continued his dynamic play, stripping Eden Powell and slamming one up for Alex Ford to net. And in the seventy-eighth, Cartwright received a through pass from Kyle Sturgeon and netted one himself. Jacob Brennaman scored the final goal on a well-played free kick in the eighty-seventh to seal the game.

What I got from this game? Cartwright has the potential to be better than Trevor Duncan, instead of the Jared Mullin comparison earlier favored. Meanwhile, Ferguson's preference for Valdevic over Agudieres continued the press conference, but the game only cemented the fact that the offense didn't need Jordan Valdevic and neither did the defense. In addition for the opponents, Eden Hazard in particular made himself a name to watch and could play off the bench at World Cup 70.

San José Guayabal 3 - 1 Super-Llamaland

Once again, the Tigers looked outmatched for much of the first half, but against a better team, the results would be even worse. It was Rudy Fernandez to open the scoring, lofting a free kick far out of Henry McNeal's reach, after a run into the box left Javier Agudieres no choice but to tackle. Sean Fraser made a run up the right and went back-and-forth with Fernandez in the thirty-sixth to set up an easy smash off McNeal, back to Fraser, and back into the goal. And Jonathan Faña made it three, running through the defense and lofting it into the net. The Tigers got a consolation goal in the eighty-ninth minute as Xavier Platona shot one into the goal.

I had my doubts after he gave up a pair against FC New Llama, but after this game, I'm convinced that Henry McNeal is still far too raw to be a world top-twenty keeper. He has the talent to be one of the best, probably better than Tyson Richards, and he's old enough to avoid an Eric Matthews flameout, but for now, he's passable but not great, especially weak on PKs and FKs.

Super-Llamaland 1 - 0 Lledia

In this game, McNeal alleviated some of my concerns about his play, saving a pair of penalty kicks in the first thirty minutes (which also resulted in Justin Allen getting a pair of yellows to miss out against Jeruselem). Jordan Valdevic too played well, especially in the pivotal moment of the game, where Valdevic intercepted the Lledian striker, pushed up the right side, and passed to substitute Anthony Player, who crossed for a header in the net from Michael McKenzie in the seventy-fifth.

The Tigers didn't win by as much as many suspected against Lledia, a weaker opponent than San José Guayabal, but the defense was rock-solid, repelling numerous attacks with only three men, allowing Ferguson to tinker with the offense with his three subs, subbing in the Player, Cartwright, and McKenzie, without worry the defense wouldn't hold, setting up the only goal.

Jeruselem 0 - 0 Super-Llamaland

On the road against tough opposition, Super-Llamaland's defense buckled down with Agudieres in for the suspended Justin Allen. Neither side allowed an inch in an entertaining game, with counterattack after counterattack falling short. In the fifty-sixth, Peter Masters drew a penalty kick, but his shot was high off the crossbar and the Jeruselem defense easily cleared it out. That would be the last Llamanean opportunity for the night.

Once again, the defense proved its mettle by holding Jeruselem to a zero. The offense looked inconsistent and scattered, however, and cost the team a win.

Hicaña 2 - 4 Super-Llamaland

The Tigers exploded out of the gate here, netting four goals in the first fifteen minutes and making things generally look like Germany - Brazil. It was Cartwright who pushed for a Masters goal with his passing a minute and a half after kickoff. The Tigers then won the ball again, and Wiggins found Jacob Brennaman in the corner for a cross and an Alex Ford goal five minutes later. Three and a half after that, Sturgeon dribbled up the side and crossed for an easy volley for Jake Wiggins. And it was Xavier Platona, in his final international game, who received a long pass from Jordan Valdevic and wiggled in for a goal in the fourteenth minute. A shattered Hicaña managed two late goals by Albert Castro, but the first fifteen minutes just went to show how good Super-Llamaland's offense could be at times.

2014 REUNION CUP RECAP

It was time for another Reunion Cup between the eight ex-members of the Llamanean Empire: Miklandia, Sola, the Arendellenske Union, Vjaalsbürg, the Hakifao Isles, Hicaña, Eyrelia, and Irelia. The stakes were high in a two-legged single-elimination format, with the winner moving on to World Cup Qualifying.

Things began at the draw, the only real tantalizing matchup being the battle of the North between Vjaalsbürg and The Hakifao Isles.

(1) Hicaña v. (8) Irelia
(2) Miklandia v. (7) Eyrelia
(3) Vjaalsbürg v. (6) The Hakifao Isles
(4) The Arendellenske Union v. (5) Sola

Hicaña 5 - 1 Irelia

HIC: Castro 18', 45+1', 66'; Rhoderick 70', Marrero 82'
IRE: Harris 16'

War-torn, quasi-communist Irelia, still suffering from the worst civil war in their history, came out fighting with a 3-5-2 formation. They took control of the game early on, and Antony Harris took a corner and headed it past the keeper to make it one-nil, sending ecstasy flowing through the waves of a broken country.

The moment wouldn't last for long, as two minutes later, Albert Castro ripped through the weak Irelian defense and slammed one into the goal to tie the game. It remained deadlocked until injury time in the first half, where Castro received a pass from Matthieu Rhoderick and banged a volley by keeper Aaron Berg, making it two-one. And Paula Robinsen's free kick in the sixty-sixth ricocheted off a ready Castro's head and into the goal for a hat trick by Castro and a 3-1 lead. Matthieu Rhoderick and Michael Marrero would both tack on goals in a 5-1 rout.

Irelia 3 - 1 Hicaña (5-7 agg)

IRE: Harris 57', Dean 76', Addams 89'
HIC: Rhoderick 42'

Once again, Irelia controlled possession early against a Hicañan squad not playing well. Still, Castro broke loose from the stifling midfield and passed to Rhoderick, who ran around the keeper and into the goal to make it one-nothing, silencing the Irelian home crowd. Hicaña started to take control, but a corner found its way into the goal after Antony Harris bent the ball for a brilliant equalizer. The stadium came back to life, and Paul Dean took a cross from Harris and slapped it in with his left, giving Irelia a lead. Hicaña attacked back, but Geoff Addams stole it from them and launched an attack, finishing it with a left-footed volley from Dean to seal the game, giving Irelia their first international win since Eyrelia as a unified nation won in 2009.

(2) Miklandia v. (7) Eyrelia

Miklandia 2 - 0 Eyrelia
MIA: Nostradamus 11', 15'

Eyrelia 1 - 1 Miklandia (1-3 agg)
EYR: Wattles 26'
MIA: Nostradamus 90+4'

Game one was over before minute twenty. Nostradamus, playing offensive catalyst as usual, took one up the right side, through the entire Eyrelian defense, and between the keeper's legs around the ten-minute mark to make it one-nothing. Possession was even, but four minutes later, Nostradamus received a long pass from Antereas Trine and tapped it off the post and in. Eyrelia continued to keep the possession even, but Miklandia's defense continued to repel Eyrelia's attacks and counterattack through Nostradamus until the end of the game, and Miklandia took a two-nothing playoff lead to Eyrelia.

Once again, Eyrelia began to control possession but couldn't get into the defense until the twenty-sixth minute, where John Else dribbled into the box and took a hard tackle from attacking midfielder Antereas Trine, who was given a yellow card. A penalty kick was awarded, and Eyrelia's Bern Wattles slammed it into the upper right corner to make it 1-0. Eyrelia then took control of possession, at times reaching 70%, for the next sixty minutes, as Miklandia made substitutions to play more defensive with only a one-goal cushion. Eyrelia pushed farther and farther up to get a critical second goal, which would tie the playoff, before a botched cross in injury time was trapped by Nostradamus, who sprinted across open ground and tapped one in, sealing Miklandia's advancement onwards.

Vjaalsbürg 2 - 2 The Hakifao Isles
VJA: Ericcson 17', Larsen 80'
HKI: Walquist 42', Borg 75'

The Hakifao Isles 1 - 1 Vjaalsbürg (3-3 AET, 7-6 PKs) (5-5 agg)
HKI: Lindqvist 83', Pedersen 96', Korhonen 117'
VJA: Larsen 21', Johansson 102', Lindberg 113'

Vjaalsbürg - The Hakifao Isles. A clash between the two Northern Greats (name predates the emergence of the Arendellenske Union as a third team), known for gritty defense, spontaneous runs, and fantastic chemistry. Always a tough rivalry, the two had last met in 2012, where striker Magnus Ericcson netted five goals in two games and the Vjaals took the playoff 3-0, 2-1. But with a dangerous and versatile style of play as a result of their 4-5-1 formation, the Hakifaos look far more dangerous than their injury-crippled 2012 team, missing stars like Sven Pedersen, Elias Borg, and Herlek Korhonen.

As usual, things got out to a fantastic start, with balanced play from both sides. Magnus Ericcson, as usual, kicked off the scoring, volleying a Sven Larsen pass into the back of the net from outside the box. Down one-nothing, the Hakifaos launched a few uninspired attacks and it looked like it would be a repeat of 2012. But in the forty-second minute, nineteen-year-old midfielder Jonas Walquist, only playing in place of the injured Herlek Korhonen, took a through pass from Pedersen up the middle and scored, tying the game at one apiece. Walquist sparked the Hakifao attack, and they played dominantly, making many attacks that star keeper Andreas Olsen barely got a hand on. Vjaalsbürg was barely holding up on their home turf, and when Elias Borg received a pass from Walquist and banged it by Olsen with his left foot, making it two-one, seemingly an overdue score, the game looked over. But just five minutes later, it was Johannes Larsen who headed in a cross from Ericcson to tie things up, meaning the next game would be vital.

It was Johannes Larsen who drew first blood for the Vjaals on a counterattack, shadowing Magnus Ericcson, dribbling across a rapidly backtracking Hakifao defense. Larsen rushed ahead of the defense, and with perfect timing, Ericcson passed through the defense and let Larsen smash one in. Vjaalsbürg continued to control the pace of the game, slowing and speeding it up on a whim, while Hakifao attacks were few and far between. The blanket of the Vjaalsbürg midfield was almost stifling, and the few balls that made it past were snapped up by capable sweeper Kevin Kristiansen. Yet in the final ten minutes of the game, a pass straight to the opponents lead to an attack from Herlek Korhonen, who maneuvered by Kristiansen. The defense caught up as Korhonen's shot fell wide off the hand of Andreas Olsen, forcing a botched corner kick by both sides. Kristansen barely managed to clear it out for a throw-in, but the relentless Korhonen once again dribbled by the first line of the defense, tenderizing them up for his pass to Oscar Lindqvist, who kicked it by Andreas Olsen to tie up the game.

Going into extra-time, the two sides were expected to hunker down defensively, and at first both did so, leaving the battles to be fought in the midfield. But Hakifao's attacking midfielder Sven Pedersen, only ten yards past midfield, caught an opening, spun, and fired, a brilliant shot that spun inches under the crossbar and past the outstretched hands of Andreas Olsen. After a pass into the defensive rabble forced a corner, Vjaal attacker Daniel Johansson, taking the corner after being subbed for Larsen, bent one of his own into the corner of the net, tying the game at two apiece. With only ten minutes to play, it looked like the two were going to play the fickle game of penalty kicks to decide who would move on to face Miklandia. But Sebastian Lindberg of the Vjaals, undaunted by the cold or the two-two score, found a gap in the Hakifao defense and dribbled through it, looping a shot over the keeper to make things three-two.

It looked over, the Hakifao Isles putting up a valiant effort but ultimately failing to get revenge for 2012. But with two minutes of injury time added, once again it was midfielder Herlek Korhonen of the Hakifaos to start a play. With two minutes left, he drove deep into the left wing, crossing on the ground to Johansson and cutting in front of the goal. Johansson cut to the right and lofted a shot off the crossbar before, in what would be immortalized by fans in that region, slid out to catch the ball on his outstretched foot and redirect it past Olsen and into the goal. Penalties would decide the victor.

It was the ever-steeled Herlek Korhonen who stepped up first, smashing one past the outstretched arms of Andreas Olsen. The Vjaals countered with Magnus Ericcson, who deked out Hakifao goalie Isak Andersson and popped one off the post and in. Lindqvist and Johansson then scored relatively mundane shots, rolling them the way the goalie didn't go to tie it at two after two. Sven Pedersen's goal was special, as he bent it a foot off the ground, curving it just inside the post with his beautiful touch. Johan Lindberg was up next, and he succumbed to the pressure, smashing it just over the crossbar. But Marcus Haugen, with a chance to practically seal the game, smashed a perfect shot, spinning barely inside the post. Somehow, Andreas Olsen proved his mettle and dove, reaching out and redirecting the ball harmlessly away. Vjaal Elias Borg cancelled out Lindberg's gaff, banging it off the hands of Isak Andersson and in. Andreassen and Walquist both tacked one on and it was four to four after five penalty kicks. Jönsson of the Hakifaos made it five-four, whereupon Pettersson's shot ricocheted off the crossbar, off the outstretched hand of Isak Andersson, and spun off the post. The Hakifaos rushed onto the field in celebration, but goal-line technology ruled otherwise. Hansen, Svensson, and Karlsen all added goals, meaning it was Vjaal defender Sven Svensson, an ethnic Hakifao, who was up next. Svensson tried a shot straight up to confuse Isak Andersson. It didn't work, as Andersson, about to dive, suddenly leapt up and punched it over the crossbar to bring the Hakifao Isles victory.

The Arendellenske Union 0 - 0 Sola

Sola 0 - 0 The Arendellenske Union (0-1 AET)

Magnusson 118'

Boring. Magnusson scored that one time. Sola played horribly defensive and the Arendellenskes couldn't get past.

Semifinals

Hicaña 1 - 1 The Arendellenske Union
HIC: Castro 52'
ARE: Magnusson 76'

The Arendellenske Union 0 - 1 Hicaña (1-2 agg)
Rhoderick 63'

Game one of the playoff was ugly to say the least. Fists were flying by the fifth minute after a Matthieu Rhoderick shot, a certain goal with the keeper out of the box, went off of defender Peter Erikssen's hand outside of the box and bounced off harmlessly, skipping past the post. Rhoderick himself accepted the ref's call, but teammates Michael Marerro and Kyle Bradley were significantly less happy about it. The argument, with Marerro/Bradley on one side and the Arendellenskes Neillson and Gustav on the other, spiraled downwards. The Arendellenskes let off steam verbally, but the Hicañans responded with their fists, and cards went flying like rain. In the end, Marerro, who knocked out Gustav with a right hook, was sent off with a red card, while Neillson, Gustav, and Bradley were given yellows.

After that beginning, the Arendellenskes played a man up, at least until the thirty-sixth, when, once again, Rhoderick was tackled hard in the box. Neillson was sent off with a second yellow, whereupon Bradley thought it wasn't enough and punched him, receiving a straight red. And then they were playing ten-on-nine. Finally, Albert Castro dribbled through the wrecked Arendellenske defense, which relied on having all of its members, for a goal, and Magnusson of the Arendellenskes added the equalizer off the post late.

The second game was much the same, with physical play led by Hicaña and balanced possession and counterattacks. Things began to drag on late before Matthieu Rhoderick dribbled through the defense, passed back and forth with Albert Castro, and put it in the back of the net yet again. Hicaña held on, and they were in the finals again when the whistle sounded. The favorites, despite a decent challenge set by the Arendellenskes, were moving on.

Miklandia 2 - 1 The Hakifao Isles

MIA: Nostradamus 35', 70'
HAK: Korhonen 15', Walquist 48'

The Hakifao Isles 1 - 0 Miklandia (2- 0 AET) (3-2 agg)

MIA: Walquist 68', Korhonen 117'

Finals

Hicaña 1 - 1 The Hakifao Isles
HIC: Rhoderick 58'
HKI: Korhonen 78'

Hicaña 1 - 0 The Hakifao Isles (2-1 agg)
HIC: Rhoderick 87'

more information to come

by **Taeshan** » Fri Jul 11, 2014 9:58 pm

Purple Knights Answer Some Questions, Ask Others

When you lose five starters from your lineup things look worrying for your next qualifying campaign. When you lose another three role players people start to wonder if you'll be able to put together a squad able to battle for qualification. It's even more worrying when one of those players is a top 5 player all time for your nation in Ender Wiggin, add to Wiggin's 224 caps on the club, Andrew Muller's 112, Jordan Jaffacake's 170, Brian Ibrahim's 150 and Peter Fasnacht's 125. Almost 800 caps and, add to that 152 career goals among them, things are worrying, but a new batch of players have answered the call of their nation to win games and score goals.

Now in the lineup are some interesting players, a new center back duo in the untested Flynn Parker and Jhett Jackal, a duo of new midfielders in Karl Llana and Grant Fauejeau, and an interesting striking option in Gregory Fawkes. Add to that a young captain in Tyler Pantoum and things look hairy for the Knights in the upcoming campaign. But enough talk, how does the team look in actual gameplay.Well to test them out Manager Gwyn Juniper set up a home and home series to start of the pre campaign friendlies, with the nation of San Jose Guayabal. The Knights won the road leg thanks to some powerful play from Captain Tyler Pantoum, who achieved a brace, but lost at home with only a goal from substitute Alex Guggenheim after a beautiful run.

It started out looking good, but everything quickly went downhill. After the loss the Knights visited Schiavonia in what was supposed to be a good pick me up game for the boys in Purple. But a B starting lineup, only including the Captain, and the two center backs saw a lackadaisical display overall and ultimately a loss to the much lower lanked side. Then another home match against Northern Sunrise Islands confirmed the suspicions that the team might not be 100% ready for the qualifiers as they fell miserably to their opponents.

But everything ended better than expected with a huge matchup between the Knights and long time foe Jeruselem. In the 27th matchup between the the Knights managed only their 9th win in what was a rather nice affair for the home side. Behind goals from Pantoum and the two center backs Flynn and Jackal, and a beautiful goal from striking sub Xander McDrew saw the Knights defeat their foes, and end the major friendly schedule with a high note. Now just one matchup with Gloriax sits between the Knights and their return to the qualifiers, and barring mishaps in that it may be a good season to look forward to.