The Rich Portian Factbook—50th Edition

[The Rich Port]

NOTE: To be added to periodically. This is a compendium of practical information intended for technical and RP references. So no non-Rich Port posting unless authorized, please.

RICH PORTIAN COAT OF ARMS



FLAGS



Sun O))) Banner



Marijuana Leaf flag, with BLUNT



Marijuana Leaf flag, without BLUNT



"Om" flag



Blood Banner



Rastafari flag



Naval Jack



Flag of the Capital



Flag of the Council



Expansionist's Flag



Flag of the Special Forces



Flag of the Army



Flag of the Theologians

[The Rich Port]

SEAL OF THE COUNCIL



SEAL OF THE STATE



SEAL OF THE GOVERNMENT



SEAL OF THE MILITARY



SEAL OF THE PEOPLE

[The Rich Port]

THE THEOTOKOS COUNCIL

The Theotokos Council was given it's name by St. Teodora, who cited an icon of the Virgin Mary as the inspiration, when she noticed all of the council members were women. The name stuck. The Council shares equal power over the entire nation, and must reach consensus to executive decisions. They review legislations, some of which they can alter and some of which they cannot.

FIRST TRIUMVIR OF THE THEOCRATIC REPUBLICAN EMPIRE OF THE RICH PORT
RAS OF JAH RASTAFARI RIJKDOM
MARIA CRISTINA BENDECIDA

Maria Cristina Bendecida is often cited as being "hundreds of years old", despite being barely 27 (her birth records were destroyed in a fire), mostly because her life is often seen as horribly tragic despite her apathetic attitude toward it. Bendecida was only six when an improvised shrapnel bomb she innocently found behind her native condominium building detonated, mutilating and crippling her and killing her parents and two other bystanders. Raised by her grandparents, Bendecida lost her right eye and her left leg to massive pieces of metal. Unable to play with other children, she grew lonely, depressed, and angry. When she was finally of age, she swore to herself never to allow her disabilities to inhibit her growth as a person.

She managed to go to college for at least 2 years, before her grandparent's funds couldn't support her education. She managed to score a gig as a Court Clerk, keeping records of court procedurals (a job given to her because she "didn't have to stand", according to her). It was during this time that she inquired to a random Voodoo priest, who's name she cannot recall. The priest turned her to a Rastafari friend, who managed to give her spiritual guidance in the form of hash brownies. Maria was converted to the Rastafari movement, and eventually persuaded to seek political power in the name of Jah Rastafari Rijkdom, a minor political movement at the time. She was the architect of the marijuana legalization bill, Religious Tolerance Act r346, which miraculously passed. This eventually led to a career as governess of the Rastafari majority-led Veve parish, before finally becoming Chairwoman after the first elections in the Rich Port in over a decade.

*: "Ras" is the Ethiopian word for "head", hence making Bendecida the "head" of The Rich Port, whereas she was once the only leader of The Rich Port. It is the first part of the word "rastafari", a clue as to it's use: the title was attributed to her by a minor committee of Rasta legislators, in commemoration of her support of the Rastafari movement. The title was re-attributed to her position as leader of her political party after the formation of the Triumvirate, which then transformed into the Council

Theme song

SECOND TRIUMVIR OF THE THEOCRATIC REPUBLICAN EMPIRE OF THE RICH PORT
HEAD SWAMI OF THE SANCTUMS OF GODHEAD
ANSUYA GOURANGA SWAMI BHATTACHARYA
अभयचरणारविन्द भक्तिवेदान्त स्वामीप्रभुपाद

One of The Rich Port's various philosophical and religious leaders, Swami Bhattacharya is often referred to as the greatest and most influential. Originally calling herself Milata (last name unknown), she emerged from a sort of obscurity in the Hindu community as a religious poet, renowned for her grace, her passion, and her knowledge of both Spanish and several Hindu dialects, serving as a link between the two ethnic groups. Her nickname was "Ansuya Gouranga", which means "learned woman of yellow skin", due to her paler complexion in comparison to her Hindu peers. She eventually became a disciple of a certain Swami Prabhupadha, who imbued in her the oneness of the Krishna Consciousness Hinduism sect. According to her, this inspired her to achieve "Godhead", wherein absolute wisdom became common knowledge to her. She used this supposed wisdom to garner millions of multiethnic followers and admirers over her young life, eventually culminating in her founding of the Sanctums of Godhead, an organization seeking to ease suffering in the world.

According to the Swami, she was born an only child into severe poverty in a country she does not recall. However, she distinctly remembers the oppression she and her parents faced under a "caste" system, a traditional Hindu hierarchichal system in which she and her parents were at the very bottom of. Her father perished due to starvation, whereas her mother was forced to stow herself and the Swami away on a migratory ship, living off of the non-perishable cargo. She and her mother drifted, hidden away on the boat, for almost a month. Eventually, her mother too perished, leaving the young Swami to fend for herself. Luckily, she was discovered by the ship's captain, horrified at the sight of a little girl and her dead mother. The captain took pity on the Swami, adopting her and giving her mother a proper burial. She lived with the captain on his ship until she turned 12, when she asked the captain to take her to the nearest country with a notable Hindu ethnicity. The captain, thus, dropped off the Swami in The Rich Port

Theme song

*: Appearance provided by ECH-ZTX.

THIRD TRIUMVIR OF THE THEOCRATIC REPUBLICAN EMPIRE OF THE RICH PORT
EXECUTIVE SHAREHOLDER OF S.C.R.A.T.C.H. INDUSTRIES
THE RICHEST WOMAN IN THE RICH PORT
USAGI TSUKINO
(signature omitted at request)

Backed by popular demand, Usagi Tsukino came into the Rich Portian spotlight after her investment became the first of 9 into the wildly succesful Japanese entertainment company, S.C.R.A.T.C.H. Industries', Rich Portian chapter. At first, Tsukino's nomination for triumvir was put into question by many political pundits, citing her lack of leadership in her own company, her young age, and her non-existant political career. However, these were all soon silenced when Tsukino became fully backed by several powerful worker's syndicates that knew her to be a savvy but calm and collected business leader.

Tsukino was praised for being the moderate voice in the Triumvirate, whereas Bendecida was often called "the left" and the Swami "the right". Designated as the "Queen of the New Aristocracy" by several tabloid magazines, Tsukino often testifies against her fellow corporate competitors. This is the reason she often gives for her omittance of her own signature: the corporate environment is particularly vicious in The Rich Port, and as such can resort to such cut-throat tactics as forging Mrs. Tsukino's signature for their own exploitation.

Theme... Song

MATRIARCH OF THE RICH PORTIAN ORTHODOX CHURCH
ARCHBISHOP OF THE CENTRAL PARISHES
PATRON SAINT OF WAR REFUGEES
ST. TEODORA DOXIADIS OF THESSALONICA

The daughter of a Greek butcher and a Russian archivist, Theodora ("Theo" to her friends) Doxiadis lived a very typical Orthodox life: prayer in the morning, housework at noon, sometimes a lavish dinner at night in order to please her arranged marriage's parents-in-law to give them a very large dowry. She particularly enjoyed sharing with the local Bishop, one Father Alexei, who was inspired by Theodora's faith, particularly in her acceptance of her arranged marriage, as most other women took to it apathetically or hesitantly. She understood that it wasn't her parent's choice or her choice; it was God that picked her husband, and she was very willing to marry the man for God. Father Alexei took quite the liking to Theodora, treating her almost like a daughter (as her own father was distant and uninterested in her); she was often one of the few who showed up to all of the Masses.

Alexei's congregation was shrinking by the day, threatened by a civil war that consumed the country, killing countless Orthodox Christians. He knew that the war would reach the town soon... One night, Theodora came screaming to him, saying all of her family had been killed; desperately grasping the opportunity, Alexei took Theodora to The Rich Port, taking away the "h" in her name to shelter her from immigrant authorities (as she was not a relative of his). He trained her in the ways of the Church, making her recite the Bible in Latin, Greek, and Spanish, and sending her to study theology. On his deathbed, Alexei ordained Theodora into the Orthodox priesthood, much to her and his colleague's shock.

Theodora is one of the most controversial religious figures in The Rich Port, as the only woman to be accepted as a priestess, not only by a Bishop, but by the Rich Portian Orthodox congregation. The community she preaches to is split in half, with those that support her voting her into Sainthood for her return to her home country to secure refugee status for hundreds of thousands of Orthodox Christians, and the other half decrying her, saying that women are not allowed to be priests. However, with the support of the other local priests and the distance between The Rich Port and other Orthodox groups, she ascended the ladder, eventually becoming the representative of all Orthodox Christians in the nation.

Theme song

DEAN OF THE THEOLOGIAN'S ACADEMY
PRESIDENT OF THE CELESTIA'S CHILDREN FOUNDATION
HEAD OF THE COLLEGE OF CITIZEN SCHOLARS
Apple Cider

A young arrival to The Rich Port, Apple Cider came to it's shores with a student visa, wishing to study the origins of the worship of the sun and of the sun worshipping peoples of the old Rich Portian islands, thinking that she would find absolutely nothing concerning Ponyfolk separate to that of the homeland Ponyist nations. So it came to her as a surprise that this was exactly what had been happening in The Rich Port: ponies worshipping a separate deity known as Solaris, half snake, half jaguar, half pony.

Both confused and dissapointed, Apple Cider asked for an extension of her student visa... And another... And another... And another... And another... Until, finally, 8 years later, Rich Portian officials offered her citizenship, a research grant, a teaching position, and an on-campus private laboratory. Very quickly, Apple Cider became the premier archaeologist of the entire nation, securing and excavating religious relics, ruined cities, and ancient battle sites, oftentimes battling smugglers and private collectors in order to keep these precious artifacts in the hands of the Rich Portian museums.

Today, she is one of the most respected academics in the world, and one of the founding members of the Theologian's Academy, the single most important institution amongst the religious elite.

Theme song

*Created thanks to General Zoi

Aliyyah-Ahlam al-Makkah
عاليه الاحلام القاعدة، مكة المكرمة

THE OVERSEERS

These can be considered the assistants to the Ruling Council, directing the actual operations of government. More often than not, the Overseers remained with the passage of leaders, with one Overseer Of The State outlasting 6, as they are positions of appointment rather than election. They are the ones that carry out policy passed by the Council and by The Senate, and can work independently should one or both institutions fail to perform it's duties.

OVERSEER OF THE GOVERNMENT
COMPUTER GENIUS
CAROLINA ROMANOVITCH JOSSELIN

Born into an extremely wealthy family of astronomers, Carolina was considered a genius from the womb, able to read and talk with limitations when she was only 2 months old. Nurtured from the start, she went on to graduate high school at the age of 12, showing absolute proficiency in Mathematics, Calculus, and Physics. She rocketed through college with zero expense on her own part, graduating, summa cum laude, with two Ph.D's: one in Quantum Physics, and one in Advanced Computer Coding. Her accolades are numerous in the scientific world, from running the first privately-owned nuclear power plant (with a reactor of her own design), to being the director of the team that perfected the use of quantum entanglement in teleportation, to mapping the parts of the brain necessary for neural implants.

All things granted, Carolina is often quoted as being intensely, if not cripplingly, shy, introverted, and introspective, and thought to suffer from an obsessive-compulsive disorder, theorized to be the root of her mathematical genius. She is described as having a "thousand mile stare", of being perpetually quiet unless necessary, and of being "impossibly creepy". Regardless, she was appointed to the position of Overseer of the Government due to her scientific background, her organization, and her command of structures and systems, if not people.

OVERSEER OF THE MILITARY,
SUPREME COMMANDRESS OF THE ARMED FORCES,
"LOVELY RITA" RITALIN PANTHALASSA

A sprightly, bubbly, tough-as-nails young woman from the start, Ritalin (a joke by her parents, accurately prophesying their first daughter's hyperactive personality) is of Greek descent, her father owning a fishery and two boats from which he supplied himself with a variety of sea-food to sell. From her teens, Rita had to learn to defend herself, as her father's fishery, located in the Mafia-dominated Kanto parish, was a target of extortion, particularly when it began to take off when Rita turned 15. An avid student of several martial arts, Rita eventually was persuaded by her parents to join the military, as she couldn't seem to concentrate on her studies (she was later diagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder (ADHD) and both dyslexia and dyscalculia. In the armed forces, she gained a reputation for having problems with authority, violently assaulting any superior who tried to force his or her will on the young private.

With great foresight, a certain General Patrick Biloxxi court martialed her, giving him a chance to confront the violent young woman. Famously, Rita broke down, revealing deep insecurities about her educational capacity, particularly calling herself a "retard". General Biloxxi took pity on Rita, deciding that, since she had authority problems, she should have a position where she commanded a authority and was not commanded. He made her an honorary General of the Armored Divisions, to the outrage of his peers. Luckily, Biloxxi's gambit paid off, and Rita became a force to be reckoned with, both drilling her men and in armored tactics and strategy. Panthalassa essentially became Biloxxi's student and he her mentor, and they became fast friends. The old General died several years back, and the fierce warrior Rita, once again, wept openly.

Her ability to dish out discipline, gain instant respect, and her fiery disposition eventually gained her several endorsements from War Hawks, and she was the only candidate to be appointed to Overseer of the Military.

OVERSEER OF THE STATE,
CEO OF BUILDERS LEAGUE UNITED ENTERPRISES (BLUE) and RELIABLE EXCAVATIONS AND DEMOLITION SYNDICATES (REDS)
KLAUS STUTTGARTEN MARTIUS

Perhaps one of the most mysterious of corporate figures, very little is known to the public about Klaus Martius. It is thought that he was a moderately wealthy business owner living out of Munich, Germany, before being drawn to The Rich Port. The period between his arrival in The Rich Port and his acquisition of businesses here is limited to receipts of purchases of vast amounts of guns, explosives, and other armaments in his companie's names, Builders League United and Reliable Excavations and Demolitions (RED and BLU), which eventually (somehow, someway) expanded to impossible sizes, becoming the mega-corporations (or the compound corporations) BLUE and REDS, which are collectively defined as Klaus' "empire". In the periods of economic and political strife, Klaus' BLUE and REDS businesses seemed to be one of the few to actually survive either annihilation by anarchists, or assimilation by Communists and Fascists.

A massive supporter of the last two regimes, Martius was appointed as Overseer of the State both to honor his contributions to political stability, and because of his remarkable aptitude at running a corporate-style department (or departments).

OVERSEER OF THE PEOPLE,
PROFESSIONAL REDNECK/EPIC WIN GUY
ELLISON MONDIEU DUVALIER

Born to a severely economically-challenged 17 relative clan, Ellison (or "Ellis" as he likes to get called) was the last person many people saw gain any sort of power. However, the Duvalier Family was already influential in the parish of Carmine, serving several dynasties of moonshiners, gun runners, and drug smugglers with several ties to the government and to the community in general. Ellison grew up in a relatively happy, if sometimes tough, childhood and adolescence, learning how to hunt, hide illegal booze in his pants, and knowing the ins and outs of the narcotics trade. Eventually, whilst drunk, Ellis and his drinking buddies decided to make a "serious" political maneuver, establishing the Rich Portian Boomstick Association in an effort to oppose gun control and promote "Christian" ideals (drinking, driving drunk, shooting, shooting while drunk, etc.). The Association unexpectedly ballooned in membership to over 1,000 individuals in a few weeks, giving Ellis the courage to run as a Community Representative, a position he won.

The runner-up in the latest elections, Ellis was nevertheless valued as a leader by Chairwoman Bendecida, and was appointed as Overseer of the People, essentially a public relations wing of the government, which he has taken quite an affinity to, beloved by the Rich Portian citizenship.

[The Rich Port]

THE ECONOMY

CURRENCY

As of 13 January 2011, The Rich Portian Simoleon (§) is valued at ~$1.8907 at conservative estimates, while more liberal estimates value it at ~$2.17. Officially, The Rich Port accepts the former, conservative estimate as a middle point. If you have foreign currency, it can be exchanged at the nearest of numerous government installations and offices; The Rich Portian government encourages this. Note, however, that you may not carry more than §500 out of The Rich Port's shores, and therefore we encourage travelers to re-exchange their currency before leaving or risk having it confiscated wholly attempting to leave the country. The only instances where simoleons can be taken out of country en-masse are when they involve legitimate business deals, with all documentation, receipts, and tax forms turned into appropriate offices. The decimal quantity of the simoleon is the anvil (σ). Specific terms for decimal quantities are as follows:

.50 (rare) = acme
.25 = frame
.10 = shillelagh
.05 = cudgel
.01 = anvil

Fun Fact: The Simoleon was once one of the most worthless currencies in the world, with the Universal Dollar equalling $100,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 when compared to the simoleon. However, following the ingenious financial savvy of Mayor Bugs Bunny and his wife, Mrs. Usagi Tsukino, The Great Bank Of Toon Town was shut down, and all simoleons burnt. This was followed by the opening of The First Bank of Toon Town, owned by Tsukino and run by Toon Town County, which helped the simoleon become even stronger than the traditional Rich Portian Pound (£). While Tsukino intended to sell the trademark of the simoleon to the state, Mayor Bunny instead donated it to the government, with the guarantee that it not be trashed. So far, so good.

GROSS DOMESTIC PRODUCT

As 13 January 2011:

Gross Domestic Product: §220,670,073,479,240.00

GDP Per Capita: §41,215.93

Domestic Consumption: §120,304,380,000,000.00

Exports: §26,130,444,035,339.24

Imports: §25,779,214,191,500.00

Trade Surplus: §351,229,843,839.24

COMPOSITION:

TOURISM

Powerful beyond anything imaginable in the same sector, and as such supportive of one of the most beautiful places on the planet, The Rich Port is a tropical-nature-lover's paradise. Charming Spanish-Colonial architecture aside, Quilombo is one of the most culturally diverse cities in the world, host to almost 1,000 different ethnic resident groups and to a rich Hispanic culture.

So, please...

VISIT THE RICH PORT

[The Rich Port]

MILITARY

INFANTRY

Perhaps the oldest military unit ever, Rich Portian infantry are the backbone of the RPAF, numbering at 30 million if not more. As such, it is vital that they are well-protected and well-adjusted to any conditions the world may present to them. Internationally recognized for their cool-headedness, their professional attitude, and their resistance to dying, the Rich Portian Infantry is varied and powerful and all-encompassing. Also, it is one of the most highly-trained, highly-specializing of Armed Forces all around the world, if not THE best. Ah, but who am I kidding? I'm too lazy to check.

The usual recruit's training is limited to about a year in recurring the basics, whilst specialization is usually carried out until the 7th year in the recruit's choosing, or, if the recruit does not choose, into where the Force thinks he may be of best use. Unlike in militaries elsewhere, the officer system has no need for commissions, as promotions are based on merit, time served, and general contributions to the armed forces. Financial ones are scoffable (due to the well-funded nature of the RPAF), and, truly, leadership, strategic genius, and common sense is mostly thought in the RPAF to only be attainable in command of men, not from books or a paid tuition at a fancy military academy... though we too have those (seriously, check out the Educational sector's budget).

Standard weaponry shall be discussed in a later part. However, the average soldier wears the standard BDU. On the field, Kevlar and quasi-concrete vests (as seen above) are always worn. They have been known to save many a life. The helmet, with a refined Kevlar design, protects against most bullets except armor piercing rounds (huh duh...).

ARMORED UNITS

The most common armor in the RPAF is the T-90S(C), a formerly Russian model adapted for most terrain and open fire situations. It can take several high-explosive rounds to the front before getting a scratch, and is generally trustier than most tanks in currently in use internationally. It's large, powerful gun (125 mm, with rifling) is often seen as a hindrance to speed and maneuverability... but that's what troop carriers are for, so screw the critics. They're not even IN the army... they're retired... but still, screw those old bastards.

The most used APC, trusted for it's endurance, simplicity, and multi-tasking abilities, is the KRAVMA56, or the "Bubba" as it is referred to by engineers. APCs are used mostly for troop carrying, cargo movement, and anti-personnel missions, usually in sweeper tactics meant to disable encampments or lightly-protected bases. For more casual action, such as minor surveillance or R&R, there is the "Bull", or, officially, the C-191, with specific attention paid to IED and mine protection on the underside:

AIRCRAFT

At the RPAF, we prefer for our units to have multiple advantages, rather than single large advantages. As such, our aircraft are meant to provide the greatest reflection of this philosophy. The Karlakon MiG-45S, an adaptation (rip-off) of modern Russian schematics of it's MiG-37, is a multi-purpose, multi-engaging, multi-armed jet attack fighter, capable of aerial, air-to-water, and even air-to-ground combat. Beloved by the air-corps, "The Big K" has seen 30 years of service and constant improvements, with little indication of becoming unpopular any time soon.

When the K doesn't cut it, though, attack choppers like the internationally-renowned AH-64 Apache are deployed. Their specialty is jet and tank killing... and dodging missiles. Although we don't know how exactly that works. I think the missiles are just scared of it, >:D.

Finally, the main bomber units of the air force is the Armaggedon class of first generation atmospheric bombers. Armaggedon planes are capable of soaring well past the stratosphere, stay there for days at a time to safely deliver well over 90, 000 pounds of high-power explosives with a 90% accuracy rate. It's name is definitely well-earned as one of the most expensive and high-tech of the RPAF's forces.

NAVY



RPN Purveyor, first commissioned modern aircraft carrier



RPN Leviathan, pride of the Rich Portian nuclear-powered submarine division and terror of the Rich Portian seas



RPN Corkoran, one of many thousand cruisers that form the forward attack navy division

Perhaps the most important of the Rich Portian divisions of the armed forces, the Rich Portian Navy is the main defense force of the country, and a long-standing tradition due to the fact... we're smack dab in the middle of an ocean. So... yeah, it's pretty freakin' advanced. Be most afraid of the submarines: we fixed the whole "coming up for air" problem thing with water-conversion vapor tanks. We take out the CO2 and have them breath a mix of packed nitrogen and helium and filtered oxygen. So we don't sound like chipmunks whilst prowling the seas looking to hunt your nuts DOWN. D:<

UAVs

Perhaps bigger than the Navy is the Force's unmanned attack vehicle division. In an effort to minimize casulaties due to over-sized enemy forces and the increase in popularity of unconventional warfare, the RPAF decided to invest as much extra money into this division. As such, it has created one of the deadliest automated militaries ever to face any enemy. While young, many UAVs are made for combat, and are capable of fighting a small war all by themselves. Unfortunately, most require an operator, so they have yet to see major action.

[The Rich Port]

DEPARTMENT OF UNCONVENTIONAL WARFARE
(D.U.W.)

Created in 2010 by the current Chairman as an independent attache to the military, the DUW was established in an effort to create a super-adaptive fighting force, capable of eliminating conflict or opposition irregardless of conditions, enemy numbers, or technological superiority. As such, the Chairman demanded the DUW not depend on any of these things. Tactics, strategy, and wits are all that would drive the DUW. After a while, the DUW was supplied with enough provisions to carry out most basic military operations. However, it's awe-inspiring core is indeed the eccentricity, abilities, and variety of it's recruits, and what has made them an essential part of the modern Rich Portian Armed Forces It's members include:

LA MAGNANIME SOCIÉTÉ DU FAUCHEURS,
OU,
LE TONTON MACOUTE

Death, calling card of the tonton macoute

The tonton-macoutes (named after the Haitian-Creole boogeyman) is a society of soldiers, warriors, and fighters that serve as the special operations division of the Rich Portian Armed Forces, and they fall under the direct command of The Council, rather than the Overseer Of The Armed Forces. They specialize in unconventional warfare, counter-unconventional warfare, solo operations, and psychological warfare. They may serve in auxiliary service to the Constabulary when requested. While their operations do have to fall under policiacal ethics and Rich Portian military ethics (both include provisions forbidding any form of torture, "lite" or otherwise), the nature of their operations (undercover) can be kept confidential until they consider their mission complete. If no progress is being made, and the threat to the divulsion of the information is considered non-harmful by The Council and/or the Overseer Of The Armed Forces, the confidentiality seal must be removed.

A macoute wearing the traditional face paint, intended to resemble a human skull and conceal the identity of the wearer

Only the most skilled of soldiers are allowed membership; in all of it's history, the society has reported no casualties. While technically a part of the army, the tonton macoute often work independently of the wishes of the Overseer, in an effort to preserve the secret nature of their operations. They can be distinguished in normal combat operations due to their silent weapons preference, their egalitarian lack of rank, their insistence on all organizational matters being decided via direct democracy, their night operations proficiency, and their lack of uniform except for their government-issued patches, and their "war paint" and their de facto logo: the front half of the human skull, either painted onto their faces or created as a sort of mask from a variety of materials; for the want of accuracy, they prefer using actual human bones, more often than not of their formerly living comrades.

The tonton macoute, organization and soldier, were created after the end of "Citizen" Marcus Poirrot's term (at his death), often hailed as one of the greatest leaders The Rich Port has ever had the privilege of electing. This came in line with the unconventional warfare pioneered by the "Mặt trận dân tộc giải phóng Miền Nam Việt Nam", otherwise known as the "Vietcong", at around the same time. All were once part of a larger international fraternity of World War veterans, but independization awarded many financial benefits to all involved.

Common banner

The de-facto "leader" of the tonton macoutes is known, soon after designation, always by the title of "Uncle Gunnysack/Auntie Brigitte" as their new legal names, "elected" via universal popular demand; it is usually the most revered and appreciated tonton macoute that is elevated to these positions by his/her comrades. The positions are not official figures of authority, but the words from the mouths of those designated as such are highly respected, and can be confused for orders by outsiders. More often than not, both a male and female fill both positions at the same time, though one or the other can appear, as is current.

Portrait of current "Uncle Gunnysacks"; former first name Marlowe

[The Rich Port]

§
THE CONSTITUTION OF THE WORKERS*

PREAMBLE:

IN THE EVENT that our freedom come to pass, and our government collapse, I, The Lady Samantha Purayah Stein III, duly elected leader of the workers of the Voltei monarchy, hereby set down the only truth that shall persist evermore, disregarding any change to the government made by any that come afterwards: that a man is entitled to the sweat of his own brow, and that while he is allowed to share it, he is the sole proprietor of his work and his destiny. Thus, a man has rights, and these rights are to be respected evermore. Henceforth, the workers of the new [Rich Portian Republic] have assembled, herein stating their consensus on the basic law of our new, free lands.

Article 1

1.) Whatever industry developed from here on out belongs to it's workers. Bosses and administrators shall be paid their due, but in the end, no boss can be paid if his workers do not work.

2.) A boss is entitled to his trade if he too works alongside his cohorts

Article 2

1.) The union is herein defined as a body of workers banding together to, within the limit of the law, fight for their rights if ever they are denied

2.) If a union brings a case to court, the court is to adress the issue immediately, both for the sake of the workers and for the sake of the population

Article 3

1.) [The Rich Port] is declared to be a republic of Workers, Soldiers, and Peasants. All the central and local power belongs to these citizens.

2.) [The Rich Port]is organized on the basis of a free union of free nations, as a federation of free national republics.

Article 4

1.) A citizen that accuses another of witholding or abusing his/her rights must bring it before a court.

2.) Courts of law are to be established as such: an elected, capable, experienced justice shall oversee the trial, a jury of the defendant's equals to decide, unless defendant specifies otherwise.

3.) The Defendant and the Accusor may argue their cases, with an appointed lawyer if necessary

4.) An accusor or defendant found to be lying shall be found to commit the crime of lying to a court and shall be sentenced to no more than or less than five years to a jail

5.) A lawyer or otherwise with a biased or coached argument is to be found against the court, and is subject to the same sentence as section 4, lest the crime is much more heinous

Article 5

1.) Regional, provincial, county, and rural organs of the governing body and also the Courts have to perform the following duties:

-Carry out all orders of the respective higher organs of their superiors;
-Take all steps for raising the cultural and economic standard of the given territory;
-Decide all questions of local importance within their respective territories;
-Coordinate all industrial/economic/political activity in their respective territories.

2.) The communities of workers and their executive committees have the right to control the activity of the local bosses (i.e., the regional congress controls all bosses and workers of the respective region; the provincial, of the respective province, with the exception of the urban bosses, etc.); and the regional and provincial congresses and their executive committees have in addition the right to overrule the decisions of the representatives of their districts, giving notice in important cases to central authorities.

3.) For the purpose of performing their duties, rural and urban bosses and the executive committees form sections respectively.

Article 6

1.) The Stein Estate is hereonout recognized as the main central authority of the Voltei Republic, and while it may not interfere in local/national issues, it may be granted emergency powers to protect against exploitation

2.) In particular, the Stein Estate may override local bosses and governors if complaints from the general populace are brought forth, either to the Estate directly or to a court of law

...

Article 17

1.) In [The Rich Port], recognition and guarantees shall be provided for the rights and freedoms of man and citizen according to the universally recognized principles and norms of international law and according to the present Constitution.

2.) Fundamental human rights and freedoms are inalienable and shall be enjoyed by everyone since the day of birth.

3.) The exercise of the rights and freedoms of man and citizen shall not violate the rights and freedoms of other people.

Article 18

The rights and freedoms of man and citizen shall be directly operative. They determine the essence, meaning and implementation of laws, the activities of the legislative and executive authorities, local self-government and shall be ensured by the administration of justice.

Article 19

1.) All people shall be equal before the law and court.

2.) The State shall guarantee the equality of rights and freedoms of man and citizen, regardless of sex, race, nationality, language, origin, property and official status, place of residence, religion, convictions, membership of public associations, and also of other circumstances. All forms of limitations of human rights on social, racial, national, linguistic or religious grounds shall be banned.

3.) Man and woman shall enjoy equal rights and freedoms and have equal possibilities to exercise them.

Article 20

1.) Everyone shall have the right to life.

2.) Capital punishment until its complete elimination may be envisaged by a federal law as an exclusive penalty for especially grave crimes against life, and the accused shall be granted the right to have his case examined by jurytrial.

Article 21

1.) Human dignity shall be protected by the State. Nothing may serve as a basis for its derogation.

2.) No one shall be subject to torture, violence or other severe or humiliating treatment or punishment. No one may be subject to medical, scientific and other experiments without voluntary consent.

Article 22

1.) Everyone shall have the right to freedom and personal immunity.

2.) Arrest, detention and remanding in custody shall be allowed only by court decision. Without the court's decision a person may be detained for a term more than 48 hours.

Article 23

1.) Everyone shall have the right to the inviolability of private life, personal and family secrets, the protection of honour and good name.

2.) Everyone shall have the right to privacy of correspondence, of telephone conversations, postal, telegraph and other messages. Limitations of this right shall be allowed only by court decision.

Article 24

1.) The collection, keeping, use and dissemination of information about the private life of a person shall not be allowed without his or her consent.

2.) The bodies of state authority and local self-government, their officials shall ensure for everyone the possibility of acquainting with the documents and materials directly affecting his or her rights and freedoms, unless otherwise provided for by law.

Article 25

The home shall be inviolable. No one shall have the right to get into a house against the will of those living there, except for the cases established by a federal law or by court decision.

Article 26

1.) Everyone shall have the right to determine and indicate his nationality. No one may be forced to determine and indicate his or her nationality.

2.) Everyone shall have the right to use his or her native language, to a free choice of the language of communication, upbringing, education and creative work.

Article 27

1.) Every person who legally stays in the territory of the Voltei Republic shall have the right to free travel, choice of place of stay or residence.

2.) Everyone may freely leave the Voltei Republic. Citizens of the Voltei Republic shall have the right to freely return to the Republic.

...

Article 64

1.) The Free Stock Market of the New Voltei Republic (or F.S.M.N.V.R.) is hereby established

2.) The market is intra-gubernatorial, however, and is accessible only to designated members, of the government, or owners of businesses dealing directly with the government.

3.) Future legislation MUST correct this

...

Article 100

1.) The Laws of the main body of text CANNOT be changed

2.) Laws can only be amended, and they CANNOT repeal any of the laws of the main constitution

A note on omission: the constitution here is included only for record, not reference. Most articles deal with organizational and budgetary issues of the time it was written. They also contained the former name of The Rich Port, the Voltei Republic, marked by brackets ([]). Hence, these articles have been omitted and edited for space, name changes, and related content.

[The Rich Port]

§§
AMENDMENTS TO THE CONSTITUTION

I.) THE OFFICE OF THE OVERSEER (1884)

The overseer shall now be created. The overseer's duties are divided as follows: to serve as an auxiliary authority to the Chair. To serve as counsel to the Chair. To serve as an employee of the people, as the Chair is. To serve as the support of the Chair. To serve in the stead of the Chair in the absence of the Chair. To be the block of strength in the government. So shall be the titles of each overseer:

a.) Overseer of the Military — to protect the country and the government
b.) Overseer of the State — to manage the country and the government
c.) Overseer of the People — to assist the country and the government

The overseer shall be appointed should the people decline to vote.

II.) THE CONGLOMERATION OF FREE ENTERPRISE (1919)

Our ideals have long existed to guarantee happiness. It failed, however, in subduing the abuses of happiness, of freedom, of the machinations of the construct of enterprise and the accumulation of wealth. With the abuses of recent years, the State has seen it fit to combine the two: free enterprise and regulation. For moderation is the core of discipline, which is distinctly lacking when anarchy comes to mind. Henceforth, the business sector and the government are one. All businessmen are government officials, and the Chair is now the chief executive officer of a vast company. The Office of the People and the State must now cooperate in management of this vast new complex as the government and the people slowly merge into one. The profit of business is the profit of the constituency from this point on.

III.) THE CITIZEN'S DOCTRINE (1924)

The doctrine of the constituency now declares that freedom cannot be contained to the walls of the Republic. For the people to grow bigger, freer, and to fulfill their individuation, the country must adapt, the country must grow, the country must expand. The constituency therefore, from hereonout, give the government all power to expand the borders of The Rich Port whenever it please the people. For if the people demand it, the government must provide. The people shall help the government help the people. And thus shall come progress in all of it's grandness and it's beauteous glory.

IV.) RECONCILIATION WITH PRIVATE ENTERPRISE (1968)

Recognizing the many changes and the presence of honor and the government within the business sector of the country, the people can now, in confidence, state that the business sector needs not interference in their work. The world must prosper as the Empire prospers. Henceforth, the people allow the deregulation of the private sector of business. The people shall tell the businesspeople: this is an investment. We hope to see profit. With profit, both shall grow and be healthy and powerful. This is the will of the people. So shall it be.

V.) POLICE POWERS (1988)

With an increase in chaos over the recent declining decades, the people now fear for it's estance. Anarchy is the same as non-existence. For too long has anarchy ruled the state and been the mistress of The World. The people now see it fit to rescue itself and rescue the world from chaos and disorder. The people, from hereonout, grants itself policing powers. This means: the people shall intervene wherever evil and disorder and malice occur. For this is their will. The will of the people is almighty. The will of the people is all. By all, for all, above all.

VI.) THE RICH PORTIAN STOCK MARKET (1999)

As the world becomes freer and as The Rich Port becomes a place of peace and prosperity, so must the relationship between the three great institutions of the country: the business sector, the government, and the people. From hereonout, the people see it correct that the Rich Portian Stock Market (RPSM) be established and opened to the public... and to the world. Whenever seen fit, businesses from across the world may invest in the RPSM, and profit from the collective efforts placed in The Rich Port by all. Such is the will of the people: strange and omnipotent.

VII.) S3 (2010)

[The Rich Port]

§§§
Selective Security System, or "The S3 Plan"

By E.E.

The Federation's government is subject to constant, unstable change in it's current state. There are two kinds of changes: physical changes and internal changes. The former can be violent, disruptive, and all together unnecessary, while certainly replacing something old with something new. However, without review, this is a proven error of judgement, and an error of political action. Henceforth, it is of the opinion of this paper that internalized change must be facilitated as much as possible. The Selective Security System shall ensure both the residence of the current government (a democracy, run by the people of the nation), while ensuring that the internalization of the state/government remains fluid and adaptive to all possible occurrences, whether foreign or domestic.

One must understand the nature of existence before one can understand himself. To begin with, let us establish the fact that we cannot be called "human". Whilst connected to our bodices, our minds have become something more. At moments, they become one with the body, when both are meant to be two. Sometimes this is physical, which has proven more detrimental. Other times, however, the body becomes absorbed by the synapses of the mind. And this has often been called revolutionary, which still carries with it some neutrality. For the purpose of this theory to be correct, however, we must call it evolutionary; it is a sign that we have become something more than human.

A wiseman once spoke:

Do you know what the greatest and worst invention that humans ever made was? Television. Television pollutes the mind of those who watch, those who lose themselves in a dream world, afraid of reality. Humans will always seek to escape reality, this gloomy, dark world. So, they immerse themselves in a great, big image formed by little dots of insignificant light. In it's own self, television has become a new religion.

Our subjugation to this machine has rendered us in most occassions into regressive states, where we become nothing more than mere animals. But by some thermonuclear miracle, an event unlikely to occur once in a billion trillion times, we move forward. We become a big picture, we become the television, living in formlessness.

The souls that God gave us thrive in an immense network, living in the vast infinity of space... Is the body nothing but a mere shell? An empty casing filled with vast consciousness and states of being... hindering and stopping the great potentials and goals one can accomplish... after all, these feeble bodies are too small, too limited a container for the wonder that is the human soul

The author offers her own interpretation of these words as "we are capable of moving and existing beyond our physical form". Technological advances enable us to do exactly that. The Selective Security System means to dissolve the physical shape of it's target and allow it to exist beyond it, both as bits and pieces of information (molecules or atoms represented as fractions of a zero, or a trillionth of a fraction) and as a whole, protected package (a body, a vehicle, an artifact, etc.).

The subject of this proposition shall entail the following resources:

1.) Varied security legislations
2.) Electronic Military resources
3.) Civilian immersion
4.) The cooperation of the state
5.) The cooperation of all institutions associated with the state
6.) The total symbiotic absorption into the government
7.) The cooperation of all current officials
8.) The assimilation of the gubernatorial Intra-Net and the Universal Wide Web
9.) The application of several technologies, as outlined to gubernatorial engineers
10.) The surveillance of all parties involved
11.) Collider equipment
12.) All available unstable elements
13.) Auxiliary materials (e.g., the waste of these unstable elements)
14.) The appointment of an Overseer to manage all of these resources

Another provision taken into account, but not capable of being explained in single bullet format, is that of the relativity of reality, as explained at the beginning of this paper and expanded to the full plane of existence, theoretically, of course. The Selective Safety System, if implemented correctly, will both be enabled by the plane of reality and actually enable it's relativity, if it does not already exist; if the latter holds fast, then the Selective Safety System shall serve as a conduit, a hair switch of sorts, to the facilitation of molecular relativity.

The Selective Safety System's correct divisionary configuration is the following:

A.) Channel Openings [or, Dimensional Partitions]
B.) Proxy Cancellations
C.) World Wide Web Manipulation
D.) Intra-Net Assimilation
E.) Intra-Net Stranglehold Software
F.) Intra-Net Cancellation Device
G.) Intra-Net Collar Program
H.) Molecular Manipulation Management Department
I.) Anti-Matter Production Wing of the M.M.M.D.

With all of these resources at hand, the author intends to create a relative reality through which both concrete objects and abstract thoughts can exist in an unalterable form. In this reality, death is not possible; in fact, it does not even exist. It exists purely as a world in between our reality and another reality. It is a limbo of sorts. Things are only meant to pass through this area; there is no life, no thought, no nothing here, like highways in the desert. Movement is suspended. The laws of physics still apply, despite the transitory nature of this limbo; this reality, however, enables us the ability to manipulate physical existance. Essentially, by poking "holes" (see A., or Channel Openings) in reality allows reality to loose some of it's rigidity. Channel Openings are essentially microscopic wormholes made wider; microscopic black holes are already a reality of atomic life, but unlike these, which serve purely to disseminate mass to other dimensions of existance, these specific channel openings serve only to move mass around the current dimension via travel in the limbo reality. Rough names for this kind of travel have already been invented; they include "teleportation", "teletransportation", and "matter transfiguration".

Observing the area around unstable elements has allowed several studies to conclude that microscopic wormholes are most prevalent in the immediate 500,000,000 nm around these elements. They have proven invaluable in both the research and the fruition of the Selective Security System. This research is not contained purely to the S.S.S. Several scientific institutes, including universities, laboratories, and military bases, have all taken the data of these studies and plan to implement them elsewhere in their respective areas.

When it comes to the ease of movement of both individual and group, there is nothing more effective nor more expensive than matter transfiguration. Actual channel opening monitor stations would be both expensive yet ineffective, as they could be dismantled quickly. Therefore, the author proposes that a cheaper channel opening facilitator be permitted. The most suitable channel opening facilitator the author could find is the shortwave radio. The author would like to endorse this method whole-heartedly. The shortwave radio is widely available in many first, second, and third-world countries, and the vast majority of airwave traffic would easily conceal movements, transmissions, and the physical abnormalities caused by the massive electro-magnetic pulse discharges caused by channel openings (flickering lights, generator malfunctions, power grid failures, electronic equipment malfunction or frying, etc.)

If applied correctly and with enough planning, channel openings can be used to transport armies, armored vehicles, even such things as helicopters and HQ buildings instantaneously into enemy territory using a budget of approximately £50 (or $40.34), a make-shift antenna, and a small, every-day shortwave radio. Other amenable uses have also been found: longwave radios, walkie-talkies (or two-ways), television sets, computer monitors, etc.

If the government were to please consider the ramifications of such a project and it's findings, the Empire could be on the eve of understanding reality in and of itself, if not discovering a powerful weapon, or the smoothest mode of transportation ever known to mankind. The author, however, can only speak for the S.S.S. as a tool of security for the government.

Sincerely,

THE AUTHOR,

0100010100101110010001010010111000101100001000000110111101110010001
0000001001000011001010111001000100000010010000110100101100111011010
0001101110011001010111001101110011

[The Rich Port]

Officially, The Rich Port has three national anthems, all of which complement the other:

BEYOND THE SEA

Somewhere beyond the sea,
Somewhere, waiting for me,
My lover stands on golden sands
And watches the ships that go sailing;

Somewhere beyond the sea,
He's (She's) there watching for me.
If I could fly like birds on high,
Then straight to his (her) arms I'd go sailing.

It's far beyond a star,
It's near beyond the moon,
I know beyond a doubt
My heart will lead me there soon.

We'll meet beyond the shore,
We'll kiss just as before.
Happy we'll be beyond the sea,
And never again I'll go sailing

Originally written by Jack Lawrence to be performed by Bobby Darin, the song is based off another, barely similar song, La mer, by Charles Trenet. The song was picked for a variety of reasons as the primary national anthem, to be played BEFORE the second anthem, always, and is generally used to open events where mostly Rich Portian citizens or a few discerning and well-informed foreigners attend. Firstly, the song is both inspiring, conveying the beautiful imagery of the seas. Symbolically, the "she" mentioned in the song is The Rich Port's main island, Voltei. However, Lawrence, the author of the lyrics, intended the song a parody of love songs of the 1950's. While people are expected to sing (lest there be a bit of an awkward silence), most do not hesitate, as the song was voted to be the national anthem, and as such is a favorite of possibly billions of Rich Portian citizens. Many feel that it is bittersweet, representing the mixed history of The Rich Port.

LA MER

La mer
The Sea
Qu'on voit danser le long des golfes clairs
That one sees dancing along the clear gulfs
A des reflets d'argent
Has silver reflections
La mer
The Sea
Des reflets changeants
Changing reflections
Sous la pluie
Under the rain

La mer
The Sea
Au ciel d'été confond
In the summer sky merge
Ses blancs moutons
Its white sheep
Avec les anges si purs
With such pure angels
La mer bergère d'azur
The sea, shepherdess of azure
Infinie
Infinite

Voyez
See
Près des étangs
Close to the ponds
Ces grands roseaux mouillés
These large wet reeds
Voyez
See
Ces oiseaux blancs
These white birds
Et ces maisons rouillées
And these rusted houses

La mer
The Sea
Les a bercés
Has rocked them
Le long des golfes clairs
Along the clear gulfs
Et d'une chanson d'amour
And with a song of love
La mer
The Sea
A bercé mon cœur pour la vie
Has soothed my heart for life

The alternative to Beyond the Sea, La mer is played when foreigners are predominant in an audience. Singing is strictly optional; instead, tradition dictates images of the ocean be displayed prominently to the audience. The song is positively sweet, reflecting on the ever-shifting of the ocean, both a kind goddess and a harsh mistress. French version is bolded.

Trenet wrote the lyrics of "La Mer" on a train in 1943 while travelling along the French Mediterranean coast, returning from Paris to Narbonne, supposedly in ten minutes, on toilet paper supplied by SNCF. He was assisted with the tune by Leo Chauliac. It was originally published by Raoul Breton.It was not until 1946 that Trenet recorded the song, since neither he nor the people around him believed the song to be anything special or particularly original. When he released the song in 1946 it turned out, however, to be an unexpected hit and has remained a chanson classic ever since.

The song has since been recorded by more than 400 other artists in many languages.

An instrumental version, the most commonly used due to the exacting key of all three, can be found here.

WE'LL MEET AGAIN

Let's say goodbye with a smile dear,
Just for awhile dear, we must part
Don't let this parting upset you,
I'll not forget you, sweetheart,

We'll meet again,
Don't know where,don't know when.
But I know we'll meet again, some sunny day.

Keep smiling through ,
Just like you always do,
Till the blue skies chase those dark clouds, far away.

And I will just say hello,
To the folks that you know,
Tell them you won't be long,
They'll be happy to know that as I saw you go
You were singing this song

We'll Meet Again is a 1939 song made famous by British singer Vera Lynn (#29 (US, 1954)) with music and lyrics written by Ross Parker and Hughie Charles (born Charles Hugh Owen Ferry, 24 Jul 1907 in Reddish, Stockport, Cheshire).The song is one of the most famous songs of the Second World War era, and resonated with soldiers going off to fight and their families and sweethearts. The assertion that "we'll meet again" is optimistic, as many soldiers did not survive to see their loved ones again. Indeed, the meeting place at some unspecified time in the future would have been seen by many who lost loved ones to be heaven.

Naturally, the song closes an event, following either of the first two songs. While singing is not pressured, many, even foreigners recognize the song, and sing it openly, often turning the venue into a raucous chorus of weeping grown adults. To those who voted it as the closing anthem, they stated that the song's relevance to The Rich Port is uncertainty. Infamous for constant and radical political changes, The Rich Port's future seems to always be uncertain to many citizens who recall past times. Many see this, however, as more opportunistic than chaotic, as the future seems exciting due to it's unpredictability, rather than despairingly chaotic.

Unlike the use of the former two, which is encouraged to be played at all events, the usage of this last song is wholly optional.

[The Rich Port]

INTERNATIONAL CRIMINAL ACTIVITY BULLETIN
courtesy of the Rich Portian Constabulary Department (RPCD)



Crime Contrast; The Rich Port v. The World

Crime in The Rich Port is severely different than one would normally identify in the rest of The World. Our constabulary has had so much success educating, disciplining, and keeping safe the population of our beautiful country that crime has very much dissapeared from it. Despite the lack of visible crime in the country, however, we must always keep on our toes. No matter how "perfect" or "safe" a country may seem, there is no such thing as "zero crime". Rather than suffering from "street" crime, however, The Rich Port has a very different kind of crime: what is known as "privatized", "white-collar" or "closed door" crime. This kind of criminal activity variation is characterized by 1.) a lack of violent conflict, 2.) a lack of evidentiary possibilities, aided by 3.) the abuse of privacy laws and 4.) the abuse of corporate freedom law, which in turn is used to perpetrate the most common crime, which is evasion of the sales tax. Most of these offenses are reported in the impossibly competitive corporate community and among several covert organized crime syndicates. Keep in mind that the streets of The Rich Port are perfectly safe, especially if you see a constable or other police officer in the area. On the other hand, keep your eyes open around social events sponsored by "private" groups, or even buying things at your local supermarket.

Narcotics in The Rich Port

Despite the legalization of a number of narcotics in The Rich Port, there remains a booming £147 billion bootleg industry unwilling to pay the government for the opportunity to reap the larger benefits of legitimate narcotics business (an even bigger £2.5 trillion dollar market). Others traffic brand-new narcotics, unstudied and unapproved by the government, and as such possibly dangerous or addictive. Drugs still illegal in The Rich Port include:

1.) Any variant of cocaine, including crack cocaine ("blow", "Colombian Marching Powder")
2.) Ketamine variants ("Vitamin K", "Special K")
3.) Opioid variants, including Heroin ("smack", "junk")
4.) Amphetamines, including Methamphetamine
5.) "Date-rape" drugs (GHB, "roofies")

Narcotics such as cannabis, all known hallucinogenics, barbiturates, MDMA ("X" or "Ecstasy") nicotine, and alcohol are all perfectly legal within The Rich Port and are taxed, bought and sold freely and openly. Laws concerning these are similar to other anti-drug laws. Peace-Disturbing Public Intoxication (P.D.P.I.) carries a slight penalty, while D. U. I. N. (driving under the influence of narcotics) carries heavier penalties. The Constabulary, despite it's indifference to peaceful public drug use, discourages as such and advise that the consuming of drugs be done in private quarters and in enclosed, safe places with a designated and sober helper nearby.

Due to the nature of the narcotics trade in The Rich Port, the constabulary also strongly advices and warns to buy legitimate drugs rather than bootleg ones. Unlike bootleg drugs, legitimate drugs follow strict gubernatorial processing guidelines that prohibit the use of dangerous and addictive chemicals. Bootleg drugs, if not poisonous, carry the risk of chemical addiction. They're not only illegal, but potentially dangerous, and without a doubt sponsoring crime in our country. Please do not buy these dangerous narcotics. Help yourself to our many brand drugs, and you will also be helping The Rich Port and it's legitimate businessmen in the process and helping to keep it the great country it is.

Organized Crime in The Rich Port

"ZAIBATSU 4"

This group of Japanese corporations (identified as a cohesive, organized, and allied clique, hence the name, which oftentimes work alongside each other in collaboration) has been identified in several thousand instances as using aggressive and illegal contractual practices that oftentimes leave the other side of the contracts without any profit or any property or even any freedom. One example of such a practice (for which 17 were convicted for participating or conspiring in) was a retiree who went to one of the corporations (in this case, Sael-Sephiroth) for a business loan. However, the two parties could not agree on an interest rate, and the retiree decided to take his business elsewhere. He had prematurely signed the contract, but shredded it after backing out. Employees of Sael-Sephiroth rummaged through this retiree's trash, pulling out the copy of the contract, reconstructing it, and then forging the retiree's signature for several checks which the company then submitted to their bank as investments, courtesy of the unknowledgeable retiree. The retiree lost his home, his property, and was transient for two years while the police investigated his accusations of fraud. In conclusion: don't borrow money from a Zaibatsu 4 company, don't sign anything from a Zaibatsu 4 company, don't even leave a signature sample around them, and be wary around employees from a Zaibatsu 4 company. Report anything suspicious. The companies identified in this circle are as follows:

1.) Sael-Sephiroth (factor market middleman company, invest on other companies via loans, sell supplies to other companies)

2.) Azula Electronic Enterprises (electronics mogul, infamous for fierce contracts enforcing ownership of faulty "knockoff" products)

3.) Langley & Ikari (law firm specializing in private military consultations; several cases pending concerning murder-for-hire scheme)

4.) Yoshimitzu, Inc. (children's entertainment company; several contracts with child actors have been deemed "slavery" contracts, have had executives arrested for harassment of clients, have been fined millions of pounds by consumer groups that deem their work inappropriate for children)

The "Retail Mafia"


If you ever see this logo, contact your local Poison Control Center, immediately

A shadow of an organization, the so-called "Retail Mafia" is, by far, the most discreet and most eerie group of terrorists anyone is bound to encounter. With only a single member identified, no figurehead, no stated modus operandi or reason, they are impossible to find, trace, or even prove that they exist. However, it is the opinion of the Constabulary that this band of criminals is real, seeing as how they have given themselves away in the past. In particular, the Retail Mafia is thought to be composed of the heads of several retail businesses in The Rich Port, both native and foreign. Their identification took a while, though, as their first crime was thought to a terrible accident.

In November of 1982, 17 people were killed when they took painkillers laced with cyanide they had bought at their local chainstore supermarket, the Oshkosh Co.. Originally thought to be severe manufacturing error, the pharmaceutical company that produced the painkillers was the first to be pursued. However, a tip was given that it was the fault of the Oshkosh Company owner, President, and CEO, a certain William P. Rickenbacker. When arrested, Rickenbacker engaged in total silence, hiding behind lawyers and the support of the conservative press.

In the meantime, evidence was re-analyzed, and another, similar incident occurred, this time only causing several hundred instances of hospitalization due to cyanide poisoning. Eventually, the constabulary managed to identify the pattern that would become signature to the Retail Mafia: a smiley face, imprinted on the bottom of the cap of the bottles containing the painkillers. Following this incident, Rickenbacker approached the RPCD with a confession: he and 6 other retail heads had concocted the plan, being sabotage experts contracted by a nation he refused to name. Retail owners nationally were arrested and questioned, but none were ever as loose-lipped as Rickenbacker ever was, or ever would be. Following a third incident, which caused a single death, Rickenbacker hung himself from the cell he had been imprisoned in, leaving behind a smiley face he had cut into toilet paper on his cell cot.

So far, 20 incidents have occurred where the Retail Mafia have been suspected, the most recent one being in 2007, when mineral water bottles containing hydrochloric acid, smiley faces drawn on each bottle with black magic marker, were given to the constabulary by an elderly citizen who had purchased the water.

[The Rich Port]

Religion In The Rich Port

A special report,
as prepared via information by the Theotokos Council

The Rich Port, as the nation type might suggest, is an assimilated super-state, a creation of the moral ideas and rules of the many cultures that inhabit it's borders, of countries that it absorbed beforehand. More significantly now than ever before, the ethnicities and religious demographic groups have asserted their desire for representation in the nation as, after all, the groups rarely shift out of their equal distribution. The social identities of other cultures have eventually fleshed the Rich Portian identity. Being a Rich Portian means to be a multiculturalist, an internationalist, and a universalist, an individual tossed salad of differing ideals organized along the Rich Portian tenets of equality, democracy, and checks and balances. Being Rich Portian means being Muslim, Christian, Jewish, Hindi, Buddhist, all at the same time. As such, the sects of The Rich Port, more often than not, identify with The Rich Port as their benefactors, both because of the physical and ideological distances to their original theological and ideological masters and the benefits autonomic religious authority brings. Rich Portian institutions, set up by Rich Portians, are usually the main authority of the worshippers, regardless of the practices of other nations.

Rich Portian Christians
†

~30%, or 2,190,000,000

A broad category, covering Roman Catholics, the many Protestant sects, the Rastafaris, the Unitarians, the Universalists, and so on. However, the Catholics and Protestants are pursuing representation via their own organized political coalition, that of The Crusader's Mansion. These are grouped in the same, equally proportioned size as due the many beliefs that they share: the Holy Trinity, Jesus Christ as the Son of God and the Messiah, the similar rites of Mass, and their holy book, the Bible.

While it can be argued that Early Christianity was the second religion of The Rich Port (after the pagan beliefs of the First King), it truly didn't gain weight in The Rich Port until First Contact with Spanish Catholics in the 16th century. Up until the 20th, Christianity was the main religion of The Rich Port, with 90% of the population identifying as such. With the Mass Exodus, however, the majority evaporated, eventually becoming only one of the many religions represented in The Rich Port.

The Crusader's Mansion is particularly vehement in it's beliefs, and faces competition from the Rastafari mansions and the Organization Of Reformatory Churches, united in their opposition of the Catholic Church's "intrusion" on Rich Portian soil.As the largest denomination, Christians suffer from the largest exodus of followers, known as the "Catholic's Guilt". Around 2,000 Christians convert away from the religion every year to either one of the other denominations or out of religion altogether.

Rich Portian Orthodox Christians
☦

~20%, or 1,460,000,000

While very similar to their Christian brethren, the Orthodox sect is nevertheless large enough and distinct enough to warrant it's own classification. These differences include: the different rites, the language used in these rites (Greek and Russian as opposed to Latin or local languages), differences in creed, differences in Biblical composition, theological differences, and sectional differences.

The Orthodox Christians believe that their movement is the original Church, as established by Jesus Christ when he entrusted the Keys To Heaven to Peter, one of his disciples. Orthodoxy was initially the religion of the very rich nobility, direct descendants of the Byzantines, as transporting Orthodox icons and supplies to establish churches was very expensive, and was almost mystical to other Christians. Eventually, though, it spread to the population as The Rich Port entered modernity in the early 1900's. Each and every denomination is run independently of the others, meaning that one Bishop does not have power over another. As such, Orthodox Christians benefit the most from The Rich Port's physical and ideological distances, and as such endorse differences much more often when compared to other Orthodox churches.

However, the Greek majority remains conservative, and it's patriarchs rarely support new changes. Violence amidst Orthodox sects has continued to this day, often in waves that come and then go with any innovation, which seems to occur every couple of years, but more commonly amidst ethnic lines; that is, Greeks attack Greeks more than they attack Russians.

Rich Portian Muslims
ﷲ

~20% or 1,460,000,000

While there exist a few Shi'a and Sunni muslims in The Rich Port, the main denomination is New Mecca Islam. New Mecca is the capital of Ishema Refugees, and was established in order to create a waypoint between Muslims and God. It is said in the Qu'ran of the New Meccans that an angel appeared to a woman named Said, and gave unto her the suhra that includes the tale, called Mercy. The suhra castigates the Shi'a and Sunni, saying that they have corrupted the words of Allah, and have killed many in his name, having been taken by the Devil and made to perform devilish acts, slaughtering many that Allah did not intend to die. To punish them, he wishes for Said to found a new place of pilgrimage, where true, peaceful Muslims can assemble, free of the violence and the evils of the older sects.

New Meccans follow the "Recitation of Peace", generally called the New Meccan Qu'ran. This version removes many of the references to violence, shame, and sin, focusing instead on the New Meccan Muslim's devotion to Allah and to good actions in Allah's honor, and that no matter what, Allah is merciful, and his children must follow this example. As such, homosexuals, converts, and non-humans are accepted into the religion more commonly, violence except in individual self-defense is prohibited, and that the only word that is "law" is the Qur'an. This also facilitates the Hajj, or pilgrimage, as the site is New Mecca, which is regionally closer than Mecca, which means more often than not there are hundreds of millions of pilgrims making the journey, a much larger number than those that go to Mecca. Otherwise, Ishema Refugees elect a caliphate, and both men and women can become Imams, who are treated more as central religious figures, New Mecca Islam therefore paralleling both Shi'a and Sunni.

Awrah, what is considered respectable to show in public, varies according to what part of The Rich Port you are looking at. Most commonly (that is, in urban or suburban areas), as opposed to the wearing of niqāb in order to hide their heads, women use it to accentuate it. Rather than it being wrapped around the head, the New Meccan khimār (cloth that covers the head, but not the face) is traditionally worn loosely, so that a woman's hair can still flow and be seen, along with her neck, similar to the way the Virgin Mary wore her veil. In other communities, both men and women wear burka or full-body niqāb while in public. In beach-front communities, Imams demand that bathing be performed nude, in order to truly cleanse the body, "rather than hide your cleanliness with clothing and perfume. These are the bodies of Allah, made by him; do not make them dirty and impure" (101.23).

Rich Portian Hindus and Buddhists
☸ 卐 ॐ

~10%, or 365,000,000

Rich Portian Hindus and Buddhists have been living in The Rich Port in peace and harmony since the 1800's, when a large number of immigrant Hindus and Buddhists arrived in the country looking for work. Their parish, Shangri-La, houses 90% of the population. They are included in this same category together for this very reason. They have been living together in this community, and thus can easily fit into the category together as well.

Sun worshippers
☼

~10%, or 365,000,000

"Sun worship" is defined as the deification and the reverence of the sun as God, or as the central or primary god. Most of Rich Portian pre-history is teeming with sun worshippers, and as such is considered the first religion practiced in The Rich Port, and the original religion. Rich Portian natives are 99% sun worshippers. It is believed by the archeological community that it was introduced, along with most of pre-historic Rich Portian peoples, by Aztec colonists, who then integrated into an Olmec community that then allowed the balooning of the population along with the spread of both peoples and beliefs across the Rich Portian isles.

The prosperity of these early times preceeded the arrival of the the two "Chichimec" peoples, the Guachilil and the Zacatecas (chichimeca means "mud people" in the Aztec language, a racial slur referring to the darker coloration of the Chichimecs when compared to their Mesoamerican-descended counterparts), which caused racial upheaval in the isles, which led to the Wars Of Preservation, which ended in a stalemate that eventually led to the combination of the 4 peoples into an alliance: the Aztecs, Olmecs (also the most numerous), Guachilil, and Zacateca.

This historical amalgamated society is known as the "Great Many Peoples", or the "Olmeca empire", and it's chieftain during the arrival of white Rich Portians was a member of the Kury tribe, which would have also made it the "chieftain tribe".

Tribal religions
Ω

~5%, or 365,000,000

Another broad category, covering a smaller number of people in different religions. Tribal religions are defined as the religions of Native Rich Portians, a religion unique to an ethnic group or a nationality, or any other religion that does not fall under a certain kinds of monotheism. These religions include Voodoo, Santeria, Greek paganism, African animism, Polynesian Royalism (that is, worship of Polynesian gods), Shinto, Star worship, Great Spirit Observance (the philosophy/religion of the Theologian's Academy), and Egyptian paganism.

Voodoo, in particular, seems to be prevalent amidst a lot of locally elected officials, specifically congressmen and Senators. Great Spirit Observance is seen by some as a New Religious Movement, even though some pre-historic tribes worshipped a similar figure. GSO focuses on the bare bones of theology, modified to be as general as possible, and almost any religion could fall into it's category if stripped down enough. This is intentional as to it's design.

Agnostics and Atheists
A

~5%, or 365,000,000

Unlike other denominations, "The A's" aren't formally or loosely organized for the most part. The exception to the rule is the Theistic Opposition Group, a group that sees religion as destructive and manipulative, but are opposed to militant action against it, despite their confrontational group name.