World Cup 68 RP Thread

[Ossidiacqua]

"Okay, lads. There's a good chance this could be it." said Yoann Vega solemnly, looking around the changing room.

A sea of weary faces looked back up at him. It had been a hard-fought campaign, but for the third time, it looked like it would be playoffs disappointment for the Acquans. The Senzatetti's journey would soon come to an end.

"I've been so proud to serve with you, lads," continued Vega, "it has been, is, and always will be an honour to manage the Acquan national team at the World Stage, and I will take those goals you scored for us that time we qualified to my grave. You've given me highs, lows, excitement, delirium, anger, and exasperation over the years. Now it's time to go out there and do it for ninety minutes. Just ninety minutes more, my friends."

"We could still do it, boss." said Velasquez from the corner.

"Well, yeah, technically," said Stefano Di Falco, "but we're not expecting miracles out there. Just go out and have fun. Score some goals. It could be your last chance to do so."

"We understand, guys." said Ezekiel Fibonacci, ever the source of strength in the side.

The sense of history and significance of the situation began to dawn on those who hadn't yet grasped the reality of it all. Ninety minutes from now, Farfadillis, who held a three-nil away goal lead form the first leg, would have likely eliminated the Acquans from the playoffs, and from the World Cup, for the last time. With no more home nation to represent, and no money coming in from any football association, continuing beyond this point would be untenable. This was the end.

"Oh, and don't give your shirts away at the end of the match," said Di Falco, "I've got someone interested in buying them all at a lump sum. The price he's paying has paid for our flights back to Aels, so if you want to go home-"

"Home?"

"Well, in a manner of speaking, home, yes. Keep hold of your shirts, basically." continued Di Falco, "We've got an early flight out tomorrow morning, it was cheaper that way and as you know we don't really have the money to spare right now. So, no parties please. We'll mark the occasion properly when we get back to Aels, so I'll hand out the tickets when it's full time. Except yours, Yoann, I'm not sure where yours has gone."

"Oh, that's okay," said Vega, "I've already got it changed. I'm staying here for a bit, hand some CVs out."

"You mean you're not going back with us to commemorate the occasion, boss?" asked Finiguerra, clearly a little disappointed.

"Ah, no, Alessandro. I'll be with you in spirit though, rest assured."

A few of the players looked at each other and shrugged. A handful of fans in the arena, an almost unassailable deficit to make up against the unsympathetic team they would be facing, and a manager that wasn't even coming back with them. The whole thing was starting to feel distinctly anti-climactic. A knock at the door from the referee woke them from the bleak feeling that was descending the permeating through the dressing room. It was time. In all likelihood, the last time.

"Come on, lads," said Vega, "out you go. Nothing to lose."

"Let's do it," said Velasquez solemnly.

"One last time," agreed Finiguerra.

"For Ossidiacqua," said Fibonacci, putting a hand out. The entire squad joined around him in a circle, putting their hands in the middle.

"For Ossidiacqua," they repeated together.

And the Acquan national team walked out of the dressing room, into the tunnel, and out to face the music. The writing was on the wall, the fat lady was singing, and the black teardrop tattoos under their eyes were joined by the real thing. This was it.

[McKleigh]

McKleigh 3 - 2 Starblaydia


Is this a cinderella run? Is McKleigh better than everyone thought? Has Starblaydia's glory days come and gone? Does Margaret love McKleigh? Does she hate Starblaydia? Is she just setting McKleigh up for utter disapointment as a cruel joke? No, it is none of the above. Starblaydia had shut McKleigh down for 75 solid minutes of play withh little effort and scoring two goals of their own in the first 45 minutes of play before letting up a bit. Then something happened and the team was on fire playing with a never before seen passion. No more flirting or female distraction could be found. Starblaydia focusing heavily on star Jonah MacGrough and team captain Donovan McNeil, allowed 3 scores on them at the 77', 80', and 88' marks by O'Ryan, McKleigh and cup first by McIntyre respectively. This all after a bit of mid field commotion at the 75' mark between the members of both teams. Nothing physical, but some definate shouting was going on between McKleigh and Starblaydia.

We asked Donovan what happened. "They said the unthinkable!" We asked for him to elaborate. He paused, took a deep breath and said, "They called us #$@*#@$"

Yes, that awful awful word was used against McKleigh.

They used THAT word, the one you don't ever use, the one with the letters G G R E I N

Post game Starblaydia players were somewhat confused as McKleighvians were heard using the same term the entire match. To help explain the McKleighvian team's reaction and capitalize on the event and sell tickets to his show, one McKleighvian wrote and performed the following song at a concert in McKleigh City earlier today. See the link below.
Prejudice

Everything appears to be sorted out at this point and there are no hard feeling towards Starblaydia whatsoever at this point. But maybe that is not a good thing, as we face them once again. They need to outscore McKleigh by 2 goals to advance, not an unthinkable feat by any means.

[The Archregimancy]

Juan Tzimisces looked carefully at some rapid-absorption image feed of the first half. 3-2 away from home wasn't bad; could have been better but for the goalkeeper's irritating habit of turning back into a jumping bean at critical moments, but three away goals and a one-goal lead wasn't to be sniffed at. With a little concentration in the second half, and they could take a useful lead back to the Dreamed Realm, barring...

"Mr. Tzimices, SIR!"

"Do I know you?"

"Gregory Tzamplako, SIR! SBIS operative, SIR!"

"I see; and what can I do for you, Gregory?"

"It's this, sir; found it in this reality, 60 subjective years from the present. Purports to be an Ordinary Reality tourism brochure from the local subjective future; need to bring it to your attention, sir. "

PARADYSTOPIA - THE NATION THAT'S MADE OF CHEESE!

Ever since the Cheese Apocalypse that followed rapidly on the heels of World Cup 68, Paradystopia has been famous for being the nation that's made of cheese!

From the mighty herds of gorgonzolabeest that roam the vast Limburger Plains, to the Brie Falls of the Camembert River (yes, we like our soft cheeses runny!), to the Sea of St. Nectaire and the Halloumi Hills, Paradystopia is the nation that's made of cheese!

For some 60 years, now, Paradystopia has been entirely self-sufficient in its food supply (admittedly counterbalanced by a regrettable increase in high cholesterol levels and heart disease), and tourists from many nations come to visit our astonishing cheesy natural phenomena tosee amazing sights, indulge in a super high-quality wine and cheese evening (wine may not be Paradystopian; the indigenous cheese grape does not produce wine), or perhaps participate in our new national sport of cheese rolling.

Whether you choose to stay in a five star roquefort hotel, or a cheap and cheerful casu marzu motel, Paradystopia is the natural destination for all tourist cheese lovers, because Paradystopia is the nation that's made of cheese!

"And what, Gregory, does this have to do with me?"

"Well, Mr. Tzimisces, sir, you're aware of the ISPI edict against this sort of thing for the duration of this world cup?"

"I am."

"Well, it sort of seems that the individual responsible may be one of the visiting fans here today..."

"And?"

"Well, it sort of seems to SBIS that you might be better placed than most to find out who it is, and stop this whole Cheese Apocalypse from happening. And maybe help us arrest and discorporate him/her/it."

"So this 'Cheese Apocalypse' is a flexible event rather than a fixed moment in time and space?"

"Yes, it is, Mr. Tzimisces, sir. If we can stop it here and local now, then it will never have happened in this World Cup's timeline."

"Right. Let me talk to the Super-Llamaland stadium announcer."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

<halftime stadium announcement>

"....special prize of a personal post-match meeting with Holy Empire manager Juan Tzimisces; all you have to do is answer this question....

In what nation will the mighty herds of gorgonzolabeest come to roam. That question again.... In what nation will the mighty herds of gorgonzolabeest come to roam."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

<45 minutes later>

"It's a fair cop, guv'nor - but how did you know it was me?"

"It's quite simple, Andrew Argyro... only the person behind the dastardly Cheese Apocalypse plot would know the answer to the question 'In what nation will the mighty herds of gorgonzolabeest come to roam',"

"I see your point, Juan; but how did you know I would actually come forward?"

"Because by the mere fact of your presence here - as confirmed by SBIS - you had to be a massive Holy Empire football fan; so I knew you'd leap at the chance to meet me."

"Well, you're certainly a hell of a lot smarter than I am Juan."

"It's nothing to do with intelligence - and everything to do with wisdom. As brilliant as you are, Andrew, you're just a little naive about Ordinary Reality; like most citizens of the Holy Empire."

"So I'm to be discorporated for the rest of the World Cup?"

"Yes."

"And the Cheese Apocalypse will never come to pass...."

"No, it won't."

"Ah well; I shall go to my temporary discorporation knowing I was unable to bring Cometupelo's extraordinary vision for Paradystopia to pass, though it was a beautiful thing, this nation to be made of cheese. But I have no regrets; especially since the last thing I saw in this subjective time was a fine 4-3 first playoff leg victory for the Holy Empire. It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done; it is a far, far better rest that I go to than I have ever known.

I'll be back; but without the cheesy dreams that sustained me thus far. Goodnight, sweet Tzimisces, and flights of angels sing me to my rest....

I dreamed a dream I had a dream
I dreamed a dream that was so dreamy
And every time I had that dream
I dreamed it was a dream of dreams..."

[New Montreal States]

Dennis Barker stared at his shoes and promised himself that he wouldn't cry. The end of all horseradish? From a soccer ball? It seemed too much to bear.

The entire room was quiet. Fillip Whoopsy's peacock feather drooped. One lonely tear trickled from Spool's right eye. Jay bowed his head, pooped on the floor, and then looked around the room to see if anyone had noticed.

"Is this it?" he asked aloud, directed at nobody in particular. "No more sandwiches? No more roast beef?"

Herf was shaking his head. "All that's left for us is to go down to the old folks' home, sit down in rocking chairs and rant at kids about how condiments were better back in our day."

"That's not how science works, Herf." said Almost-Doctor Chanxi Yuan, who had been patiently waiting for everyone to pull themselves together, and had realized that it wasn't going to happen without a little help.

"How does science work, then?" asked Dennis. "I got a C- in Bio, and I was kicked out of my chemistry class for spilling silver nitrate on the teacher."

"Science will always find a way, just like Love, only with fewer divorce lawyers," explained Chanxi. "If we can get our hands on some of the balls, we can figure out how they're related to the oomycete, and how to protect horseradish for generations to come."

"But how are we going to get our hands on these balls?" asked Spool. "They're ultra-mega-super exclusive!"

"I have a solution to that, too," replied the Almost-Doctor. "Remember last year's office party?"

"Huh?" asked Fillip Whoopsy.

"Those idiot jerseys you made us wear! Where did you put them?"

"Oh! I think they're still in my office."

"Go get them," said Chanxi. "I have a plan."

"Is it crazy enough to work?" asked Herf.

"We'll see."

---

President Whoopsy left the room and came back with a burlap sack. He emptied the sack on the middle of the podium - covering Jay. After a few seconds of indignant quacking, Jay had regained his freedom and the jerseys had scattered onto the floor around the podium.

"Here they are!" announced Whoopsy. "Only slightly less the worse for wear!" He picked one up and showed it to his employees. It was an official Lymantatian national team jersey. On the front it said "Lymantatia" and on the back it said "Some Lymantatian" with a number just below it.

"Ummm...is that the way they're supposed to look?" asked Herf.

"Every Lymantatian jersey in the world is like this one, except for Jacques Bressler," explained President Whoopsy. "I get to be Bressler, because I'm special."

"I think Dennis should be Bressler," said Chanxi, "because he's the only person here who speaks French."

Whoopsy thought about it for a second. "Okay, he can be Bressler," he grudgingly agreed, "but I'm still special, right?"

"Quack!" said Jay.

"Oh right!" said Whoopsy. "I have a goose-sized jersey for you right here. Now let's go impersonate a football team!"

[The Archregimancy]

Monastic
Quarterly
The Magazine for Monks


Profiles
Fr. Alexander James, chanter, the Backstreet Monks.


We understand you're a big fan of the Archregimancy's national football team...
Absolutely; I follow them whenever I can - something which has been easier this World Cup since we've performed before almost every match!

So you must be pleased at the first leg playoff result
An away win is always useful, and I shall be praying for a similar result in the home leg.

So is the Pope of Rome an atheistic freemason-loving hell-bound schismatic?
That's a bit of a loaded question....

Maybe; but is he?
I have no reason to believe that he's an atheist; a schismatic, undoubtedly; a heretic, possibly; an atheist, no. As to his status at the Last Judgement, I tend to follow St. Maximus Confessor in a modified version of the universal salvation originally propounded by St. Gregory of Nyssa and Origen - we may certainly hope for the salvation of everyone, including the various Popes of Rome.

Art though a moderate, then?
Thou sayest it.

But it's true that you wouldn't automatically condemn the Pope of Rome to the fiery pit of....
Τί ἐστιν ἀλήθεια? Or as the Pope of Rome might prefer, Quid est veritas?

Moving on to other issues...
Please; it was you who raised the Pope of Rome, not me. It's not really what I came here to talk about.

I understand that you're in line to perform at the opening ceremony of the World Cup?
I can't comment. Our people are talking to their people, so I can't rule it out - but nor is it certain. Pray for us.

And any predictions about the playoffs now that we're halfway through the first leg?
Well, with the Holy Empire and our lads both winning away from home, and New Montreal States holding Kazamatsuri to a 0-0 away draw, it was a good first matchday for Orthodox nations; but let's wait and see. Humility before presumption, I would think.

Thank you, Fr. Alexander James

[Felix]

World Cup 68 Qualifiers: Felix-Blouman Empire Leg II
By: Steven Smith

Felix came in to the Blouman Empire under heavy watch by security guards from both the host country and the ones brought in from Felix courtesy of the Felixian Football Association. So what was the reason of the heavy security? Terrorism. Yes, there has been some terrorist attacks in the country of the Blouman and it is because of those attacks from the past made the security inside Mellor Insurance Stadium tight. As for the match itself? Felix won it but barely, we struggled in the first, badly might I add. This recap will give you the full look of the game played in the dangerous country of the Blouman Empire.

The first half as mentioned earlier, was terrible in the first 30 minutes. In the 9th minute Michael Walkers started the 7 goal battle with a fantastic shot that our goalkeeper Matías Ciriaco couldn't block. He was helpless as the shot went to the sweet spot. The upper right corner. But Blouman wasn't satisfied with a one goal lead, no, in fact they made another one 11 minutes later. And it was Walkers again with the goal, this time it was assisted by Steven Mallard. Mallard kicked the ball in right into the box and a open Walkers headed the ball in. 2-0 and Felix needed to focus, if you didn't tell, they weren't.

While the team was getting ready for the restart Mikel Araboa was called in by Ishikawa Haruka. Mikel Araboa for those that didn't know, was the captain of the Felixian national team after Ciriaco allowed him to be the captain. Anyways, it seemed like Ishikawa gave a little pep talk to Araboa, no one but Araboa and Haruka know what they said but it seemed to motivate Araboa and he yelled out something was inaudible where I was but probably audible to the football players on the pitch. That something seemed to now motivate the whole team as they began to focus and respond to the Blouman assaults.

Another attack came and it looked like there would be the third goal for them but no, a bad pass by one of the midfielders was intercepted by Maria Martell and she started a terrific run. She ran past defenders and she found an open Sebastian Krister and to the right of him was a somewhat covered Mikel Araboa. Martell passed the ball to Krister and Krister gave a quick forward pass to Araboa as he went past the defender and was in a one on one situation with Milton Tuneson. Even with Tuneson's skills he couldn't get the ball out of Araboa's feet and Araboa had no one left to confront he simply tapped the ball in and Felix was coming back in the 28th minute.

Felix was determined to make the game even again before halftime and the Felixian offense was overwhelming the Blouman defense. Eventually that constant pressure resulted in the draw as Felix scored a wonderful goal in the 41st minute. The goal was fantastic, the build up to it was pacey and full of passes. Eventually the passes resulted in a pass that was a bit high and far for Sebastian Krister but he didn't care as he made a diving header into the goal shocking the Blouman home crowd and giving Felix a lot of hope for the second half. The diving headsman got up and ran to the corner and slided down raising his fists into the air. 5 minutes later Felix and Blouman ended the first half tied.

The second half was full of Felixian momentum but a costly mistake early in the 2nd gave Blouman the goal advantage and swing the all important momentum to Blouman's way. The 49th minute goal by Michael Walkers gave Michael his third goal after he intercepted the pass made by Aloysius Blau. He simply ran past the Felixians and he shot another accurate and powerful shot in the top right corner. Poor Ciriaco didn't stand a chance, again. Blouman was ahead 3-2 and the loud and proud crowd was behind them supporting them with chants and just simple loudness. Felix once again needed to come back.

And Felix did in the 54th minute, they tied the game in a nearly sold out Mellor Insurance Stadium with a spectacular shot by Ji Iseul Kwan from outside the box. Sebastian Krister simply supplied the ball to him and Iseul took control of the ball and shot. It bended from the middle of the goal to the left side. There was no way the goalkeeper could block it. Felix drew the match up with 36 (plus the whatever stoppage time received) minutes left in the match. Both the home side fans and The Phoenix fans were weary as either side had a chance to get the lead. Each side provided great opportunities for goal.

But it was Felix's 76th minute attempt by recently subbed in Jacinto Crespo that shot the bicycle kick coming from a excellent cross by Kunibert Mathias. The crowd was silenced as they were in total shock that their national team gave up a goal. The fans of the Felixian side on the other hand jumped up in total joy as the they began celebrating the first lead of the day against the superiorly ranked Blouman Empire national side. Felix had the 4-3 lead and this was an excellent situation to be in. Felix now wanted to conserved their lead they were so close to the end. And Ishikawa made a change adding the more defensive midfielder Nickolaus Dürr and set their side on the defensive.

It worked, with the amount of people in the box a chance a at making the scoreboard reveal a draw was being extinguished. There were some great chances though from the Blouman side but they just couldn't break through the now renewed Felixian defense. Felix eventually got the ball and they ran down the clock until the referee whistled the final whistle. Felix did the impossible and beat the higher ranked team at their house. Now Felix was one win (or draw) away from being the their first World Cup final ever. This would be a huge accomplishment for the Felixians after experiencing two close calls into the playoffs and one horrid campaign.

So Felix will face the Blouman at Stadio Altomare where 95,000 fans will be supporting The Phoenix. To go there is a huge challenge for any team especially if you are behind coming into the second leg. So Felix is just one win away from World Cup qualification. Can we do it? Yes we can. Be sure to watch the match on Channel 7 sports. Until next time! And good luck to all the teams!

[The Inevitable Syndicate]

As my chances look slim, let's go poking around quickieleaks again, and see what more we can find out about Corvidae...

>goto quickieleaks.co.mr
webpage requests password: *************
password accepted.
>pull document appendix_4b_leak_trackfind.txt
document pulled.
>terminate connection quickieleaks.co.mr
connection unable to be terminated from quickieleaks.co.mr
unknown source requesting IP address
sending IP address to unknown source
>open document appendix_4b_leak_trackfind.txt
opening document...

OPERATION CROP DUSTER - APPENDIX 4B

SECURITY LEVEL: 2+

STORAGE FACILITY
This appendix concerns the location of the true results of the last (2178) election, after polling booths were replaced,
and digital stations hacked while data was en route to collection centre. The old YouPoll servers were destroyed,
however full paper records have been retained in order to provide information on those who legitimately voted for Corvidae.
These can be found in Boxes 18A - 25F, at the end of the collection.

Attached is Map (i), which displays the location of the manhole cover which is closest to the vault.
Map (ii) gives directions upon entry to the sewer.

ROOM LAYOUT
The room contains seven cabinets of boxes, which sit on three levels of shelving. Boxes 1A - 3F are present on the left upon entry,
with 4A - 21F prsent on the five cabinets directly in front of you upon entry. Boxes are colour coded dependent on what they contain in them.
Polling Station records are ORANGE, Mail Votes are PURPLE, and YouPoll results are in GREEN. Boxes contain several FOLDERS,
which contain RECORDS SHEETS inside. There are fifty (50) records sheets to every folder, and the records sheet contains thirty (30) votes on it.
Votes are displayed in the following format:

#1093 SMITH JOHN 37 M FB12AB CORVIDAE


SORTING PROTOCOL
POLLING STATION RESULTS: Sorted alphabetically by PARTITION, then POLLING STATION. Records sheet sorted by NUMBER, which is sorted by SURNAME.
MAIL VOTING: Sorted alphabetically by PARTITION. Records sheet sorted by NUMBER, which is in turn sorted by SURNAME.
YOUPOLL SERVER RESULTS: Sorted alphabetically by PARTITION. Records sheet sorted by NUMBER, which is in turn sorted by SURNAME.

ROOM SECURITY
Vault requires entry of eight (8) digit passcode before entry. Passcode list changes every week, and is given out by Ministry of Information encrypted channel #37.
Password Required. Nine (9) explosive charges are placed in the walls of the vault, and are to be detonated upon the discovery of intruders,
or in the event the data needs to be destroyed. Three (3) security cameras are located in and around the vault - two (2) within, and one (1) outside.
In the event the cameras lose connection, armed guards are sent to investigate the vault, in order to check if it has been compromised.

EVENTS UPON WHICH DATA IS TO BE DESTROYED
- Coup D’Etat
- Intruders
- Foreign Invasion
- Supreme Administrator Commands It
- Security Leak

ip address sent to unknown source
>open ip_masker_cypher.exe
ip_masker_cypher.exe already open
ip_masker_cypher.exe shutting down
we know you've been watching. expect justice.
shutdown request recieved. shutting down...

[Northern Sunrise Islands]

RADIO ESPORTIVA
Season 2, Chapter 6: Desperate Times, Desperate Measures

TV Voice-over: It's the final match of he Amy State Championship! Amy City and Alice City Madness at the Incomm Arena at Matthew City for the big silverware next, at Esportivan Football 9!
Dainer: Prepare to feel the wrath of capital city's best!
Sunrise: Hah, Roses can't handle the strength of the Madness, Dainer!
Dainer: You better recognize!
Sunrise: Feel the power of Madness, fool!

The door quickly opens with Sideburn popping up from it.



Sunrise: Why?
TV Voice-over: It's a big atmosphere at the InComm Arena! Max Champion with Newt Manchester and Erin Leicester for what promises to be a big game between... Amy City Football Club and Alice City Madness!
Sideburn: Esportivan Football 9?
Dainer: With an Emirates of Futurnian patch added to it, yeah.
Sunrise: What did you expect us to be playing? UICA?
Sideburn: Well, yeah. It's a more complete game.
Sunrise: Oh, sure. Because we really need to play as the lower teams of Paripana that much.
Dainer: They did not add big time leagues like Saint Anne and Jacob and Bleak Rock anyways.
Max Champion: It's a match of equals as these both teams are in the lower leagues of the strong Sunrisian league.
Newt Manchester: Indeed. How long do you think it will take for these players to continue on our mission of spreading the Sunrise throughout the globe?
Erin Leicester: Future stars! Bright action! Everything needed for a great match.
Sideburn: I'm going to need you to do some scouting on my opponent for the Play-offs, Sunrise.
Sunrise: Uh? What?
Hodori: Unyu?
Sunrise: Wrong cue, Hodori.
Hodori: Unyu...
Sideburn: Well, you have some friends at Aoton, so I suppose you could do some scouting at Nev and Sindy.
Sunrise: Uh... Who?
Hodori: Unyu!
Dainer: There we go.
Sideburn: The Inevitable Syndicate combo. They... they were originally just Inevitable, but something happened and now they're like twins.
Sunrise: Well, I suppose I could do it. Dainer, can you finish off the match on your own?

Hodori was already playing Dainer and winning by two goals.
Max Champion: An emphatic shot by LaRusso and the Madness is now two nil on top of Amy City!
Dainer: Stupid radioactive jackass...
Hodori: Hey, I'm not a jackass!
Dainer: ...
Sunrise: ...Aye, I'll go.

A while later, at Aoton. Sunrise, decked in camo like Solid Snake, was hiding under a box slightly risen, peeping through the window.

Sindy: Still mad at me?
Nev: Of bloody course, you have painted a god-awful bird on our house's wall!
Sindy: Looks way better than that stupid bracket thingy we had anyways.
Nev: Pfff...
Sindy: Look, we're going to need to focus.
Nev: For what? World Cup?
Sindy: Of course! How are we going to show how powerful we are? By walking around like those jackasses in black trying to raid things?
Fligsive: Grrr...

Meanwhile, at Hujuk's home, named Flegavia. A group of people dressed in black with masks and what not knock the door.

Hujuk: Oh, hey.
Riders: Huzzah! Huzzah! Huzzah! This place is now property of the Black Riders!
Hujuk: No.

Hujuk closes the door, sighing.

Riders: Aw...

Back at Aoton...

Nev: I dunno, we could...
Sindy: No.
Nev: But you haven't even heard yet!
Sindy: Because I know you will say something stupid. You don't represent pride in this house enough.

The Inevitable Syndicate's pet hound Fligsive found Sunrise and wasn't really happy about it.

Sunrise: Ow!
Nev: Who's that?
Sindy: Oh, that jackass Sunrise! Go tie him!

Some minutes later.

Sunrise: Eh... w-w-would you mind letting me go?
Sindy: Spying on us, heh? What do you want?
Sunrise: I'm... I'm just here doing a job... To get money for Radio Esportiva.
Nev: Well, I have an idea for that.
Sindy: Sell his organs for money?
Sunrise: No!
Nev: Of course not, that would be too barbaric.
Sindy: So what's the plan?

The day after, at the Grand Hall.

Legal: Welcome to the World Cup Play-offs First Leg of the Very First Round!
Sindy: I can't believe he backed out of this.

Sindy, representing Inevitable together with Sunrise, who had to be dressed like Nev as a substitute.

Sindy: Looking on the bright side, you're gonna fight for us today anyways. Hope you didn't have anything planned tomorrow.
Sunrise: Well, I have a fight against Cass according to this schedule... though I'm not sure if it says Fight or Twister Match.

Sunrise showed up a schedule of very strange matches which included McKleigh against Starblayde in a table tennis match, Glaser and Eura in a spelling bee contest and Apox and Licen in a tea drinking contest, among others.

Sindy: Well, they said they were going with a different structure.
Sunrise: With Table Tennis? Spelling Bee?
Sindy: I agree. But we accepted it back then...
Sunrise: Oh, care to explain why you suddenly are two?
Sindy: Arceus.
Sunrise: Oh, for Giratina's Sake.
Arceus, telepathically: My bad, Sunrise.
Sunrise: So. Who are we facing... Sideburn!?
Free Republic: Time for our first match, a boxing match between one of the Inevitable brothers and Sideburn!
Sindy: Go get him, tiger.
Sunrise: Tiger?
Sindy: ...Arcanine.
Sunrise: Oh!
Sideburn: Aye, mate. Time to screw ya around!
Sunrise: J-j-just don't try to hit too hard...
Free Republic: AND IT'S ON!

As the bell rung, Sideburn went for a fast left punch, knocking Sunrise's disguise out and Sunrise himself straight away.

Sideburn: Oh, god!
Jeru: ...More like a Metapod. Shame he looked kinda cute.
Guayabal: Jajajajajaja!
Felix: The hell, Sunrise?
Cass: Hah! Someone did my job earlier!
Saintland: *waving a towel* Hey, dude! Wake up!
Free Republic: And the winner... Esportivan Minnow Sideburn! *rings the bell* And Sunrise, you have a Twister match against Cass tomorrow!
Sunrise: ...B-b-blast it..

Sunrise falls unconscious, being carried away by fellow Esportivans and Sindy, while other contestants just start to argue with the hosts. Among the things Sunrise could last hear were a "This is a mess! Stop it!" from Valanora, a "What the hell was that?" from Vilita and a "Hue" from an amused Farf.

---

WORLD CUP QUALIFIERS PLAYOFFS, FIRST ROUND
Fans and players excited after being able to draw against one of their bigger idols, Fillies and Vaporeons tie 0-0 at Mardi

An almost sold-out Union Stadium saw the Vaporeons and the often impressive team of Cassadaigua start their play-off red-hot, but ultimately failing to one-up each other as both sides now look forward to the match at the Concord Heights later tonight with the scores unaltered. Both sides tried rather consistently, with the Vaporeons using home power to start the match on a hurry, but wouldn't surpass the Dagans skills back at the net, while the opponents wouldn't have much luck against Mellody Sioux either at the second half. Sioux perfomance was strongly commended by coach Val Kylx who seemed more eager to talk about what will be his next destination and way less into talking about the draw as he was most likely remorseful of a loss against an all-female squad, which shouldn't be a taboo, but then again, it's Kylx we're talking about.

The Sunrisians happened to be very kind-hearted after the match, respectful about their idols, which they ended up facing on dear lack of luck after a random draw, which has also been strongly controversial, after Free Republicans cohorts Saintland ended up drawn against one of the few teams in the First Place play-offs that shouldn't really cause a lot of fear on their opponents eyes, the also controversial Jeruselem; whom they also ended up tying anyways. Forward Mateus Carvalho, who barely had chances against the talented defense that he went against, later being substituted by Christie Travis, declared "I'm satisfied with the result, though I still feel we could have gotten away with a win. The fact we're facing an unrested Cassadaigua who probably went through way more trouble than us to get here is a big concern, specially to one of Esportiva's biggest teams, with all due respect.".

The name of the game for the Vaporeons, Mellody Sioux, was rather proud of her perfomance on the night. "It was nice to be able to face such strong team and maintain a clean sheet against them. But we really need the win and you can bet we're going to do our best against the Fillies for that early spot in the World Cup." Sioux also featured as one of the athletes talking about the dance of chairs going for the coach spot of the Vaporeons. "We achieved a lot under Kylx's reign. While I can't say we really did anything different from what we used to do while Bourbon was our coach, Kylx made us laugh way more. It's a bit difficult to get used to him, but if you try hard, he'll come as a rather silly figure and will keep your mind cool before and after the games.".

Kylx will leave the Vaporeons' coach spot after three years working with the Vaporeons in some way. While a Skitty, Kylx was a sparring partner of the All-Pokémon level team that Northern Sunrise Islands used as a way to promote union between mankind and Pokémons for one year until his return to being a human. After his debilitating accident at Mink, Kylx accepted the role of Under-21 coach and won the Di Bradini Cup, a first for an Esportivan squad and later on was picked to coach the main squad after Bourbon's failures. A term with Fontvieille from Yttribia has sadly also included his departure from the Vaporeons, making him a possible pick for the Yttribian coaching position. "It was a hell of a ride, but I rather leave it while I'm ahead. The Sunrisians have been a rather accepting group of folks in my rather dark career and I'll try to leave with my nice, fond memories. Either that or reactivate Slembana, of course." declared Kylx, with a small smile on his face.

Jean Mulhouse, president of the Northern Sunrise Islands Football Confederation has been looking for some options but has yet to determine one name for the coach. Supposedly, the first known name is Balmian Albert Einstein, the Third, known member of the knowledge high class of the Emirates of Futurnian country and also had some stints coaching Vaporeon related teams. A second name is a left over Simeone di Bradini clone from Schmiegelland's old experiment of fielding a Di Bradini filled squad at a Di Bradini Cup. Supposedly, the Sunrisians have had luck with loudmouths, so a new loudmouth could work. A third name, resuming all the bigger contenders is Kazamatsuri's coach Mihashi Chiyo, who has also been considered at Matthew City Senators to take on the ropes that Curtis Branderpark is leaving after an accident at Pharyngulat that somehow cut both his hands off. Other suggested names, but on large runners are Apoxian Wally Kwit; currently coaching the recently-promoted Moonlight City Artemians, Farf Agundí Frêndè, who remains to obtain a coaching license, but has quite a following at Neuville; Roca, coach of the Selyne City Athenians and maybe a return of Lynette Bourbon, though she has been rather angered by NSIFC president to consider it.

[Saintland]

The Saintland National Soccer Team had played Jeruselem to a 2-2 draw in Jeruselem. While some media reports mistakenly reported that the match had been played in Saintland, King Petrus XX was not fooled. He had delayed his preparations for the upcoming World Bowl XXIII, where Republican oddsmakers had his National Gridiron Team and the team from Cassadaigua as co-favorites to win it all. Instead, he was supporting his younger brother Andreas in his efforts to qualify for the World Cup, for the second time in his last 2 attempts. Even though they had not performed particularly well in the 59th Cup of Harmony, following an ill-fated boycott of World Cup 67 Qualifying that saw the Feministvs Sanctvsterra activists who impersonated the Sanctii blow an opportunity to automatically qualify on the final day, the Saintland National Soccer Team seemingly did not miss a beat once World Cup 68 Qualifying began. Although they would take just 1 point from Vilita, they otherwise managed an undefeated, untied World Cup Qualifying campaign. Now, they had tied Jeruselem in Jeruselem on a day where upsets had been the norm.

The Taeshani press had picked Jeruselem to win this playoff series, but they seemed to be making predictions based on the relative strengths of the playoff contenders way back in the 64th World Cup cycle. While that was only around a year ago, a year is an eternity in the world of international sports. A year ago, one of the World Cup hosts was Wight, who would later go on to win the World Cup in the 65th cycle last summer and disappear entirely shortly thereafter. A year ago, the Babbage Islands were ranked #1 in the KPB rankings, a co-host of the most recently completed World Cup was Aguazul and the Kingdom of Saintland was an up-and-coming nation that had stunned the likes of Krytenia, Queer Poco el Mono Ara and Zwangzug while also putting a scare into Audioslavia and Kinitaria before falling short of qualification. These days, the World Cup hosts are Legalese, who hosted the 52nd Baptism of Fire just 10 months ago, and the Free Republics, who were a complete unknown just 12 months ago. Nations come and go, as we have seen over the past year, but the Will of God is eternal.

However, even more than the dramatic power shift that had taken place in the world of international sports in the past year, the King of Saintland's main focus right now was a new article on the web site of Sporting World Magazine, the popular sports news magazine from the Free Republics. The co-chair of the Seeding Committee herself, Nova Hellstrom, had decided to write an article in Sporting World about several controversies that had developed recently relating to the Seeding Committee and the officiating for many Qualifying and Playoff matches. He read it carefully:

Sporting World

No, Your Ranking Doesn't Entitle You to a High Seed
by: Nova Hellstrom

You've all undoubtedly heard the complaints by now, especially after the Night of Upsets. According to some conspiracy theorists, the World Cup 68 Seeding Committee and the organizers of World Cup 68 are conspiring against certain highly ranked national teams. Apparently, there are many in certain nations that believe that their past performances entitle them to a spot in the final 32 of World Cup 68. This is absolutely preposterous. It doesn't matter how many World Cups you've won in the past and it certainly doesn't even matter that you are the defending World Cup champions. The only things that matter are how much you want it now and whether the Higher Power is on your side.

I would have thought that the final tables from World Cup Qualifying would have put all of this complacency to rest, but it seems that it did nothing of the sort. The Esportivans, despite their inherent genetic inferiority to everybody else, somehow managed to win 3 groups and place a substantial number of nations in the Runners Up side of the playoffs. They did that because other, more accomplished, nations have gotten lazy and allowed the Esportivans to run amok. While Esportiva is home to a bunch of minnows who are, of course, greatly inferior to everybody else, effort can overcome talent and it has done so on several occasions.

On the first night of the playoffs, the lower seeds were at home. With a home field advantage on the side of the underdogs, it was a night of upsets. Complacent favorite after complacent favorite fell on the night, while some of their fans, particularly those who still live with their parents, in the basement, went on the Internet to moan and complain about how their national soccer team had performed and accuse the Seeding Committee and the officials of corruption. It seems that there were many sore losers, who just could not accept that their KPB ranking, based on their past performances, did not guarantee them a victory against "lesser" opposition.

This kind of entitlement is certainly not unprecedented. In fact, there are quite a few entitled younger wrestlers in the RWC locker room these days, especially now that management has greatly expanded our schedule to fill time on the RWC Network, necessitating a larger roster. I can't believe how many young wrestlers think that they are entitled to a spot on our major cards or even a title belt. Those of us who are currently on the roster worked our way up from the bottom. We earned our spot by leaving our blood, our sweat and our tears in the middle of the ring, but the entitled youth of today think that they should just be handed something that they haven't earned and that they are, quite frankly, not ready for.

We are also, of course, all familiar with the entitled teenagers who believe that they are owed a good-paying job rather than the 3 thaler an hour jobs at the local fast food place that we worked when they were their age. Even though I'm only 27, I am appalled by how much lazier the youth of today are and I am appalled by their entitlement. Of course, not all of them are like that. The young men and women in Mr. Theriault's system are the kind of decent youth whom we should all be proud of. I've seen their work ethic firsthand and I am absolutely certain that Mr. Theriault is not the kind of man that will permit laziness. I must also mention our young men in the Armed Forces, who fight so that all may be truly free, someday. They are my heroes and my inspiration.

However, in the world of international sports, it seems that the entitled are those near the top of the KPB rankings, which seems kind of paradoxical, until you realize that many of them have fallen into complacency and take for granted that they will qualify for the World Cup, just because they've always qualified for the World Cup. Take Starblaydia for an example. They've won more World Cups than anybody and even somehow managed to make it to the finals of World Cup 63, despite being so complacent that they didn't even release a roster until they were already in the semi-finals. Somehow, an overconfident Starblaydi team managed to lose to McKleigh. According to the McKleighnian Daily, Starblaydia actually led 2 goals to nil when they were 75 minutes into the match, but managed to somehow concede 3 goals against unranked opposition in a span of slightly under 12 minutes. Or consider the Equestrian States, who actually lost to Armakistan. Armakistan, for those of you who haven't paid all that close attention to this World Cup, is an Esportivan minnow that competed in the most recent BoF. They finished 3rd and somehow managed to luck into a spot in the playoffs by drawing a ridiculously easy group. Now, they somehow managed to secure a 1 goal to nil victory over those talking farm animals. While they will, being the sore losers they are, undoubtedly complain about it, the fact remains that they got beat by an Esportivan minnow straight out of the BoF! I have to say that I love this format. No other format could possibly bring about results such as these, which is what makes it so great.

Let me finish today by talking about those Felix Trolls. Now, they're going around claiming that they will demand, if they manage to qualify for the World Cup, to play in Legalese instead of playing in the Indispensable Nation. I have actually spoken about that with Mr. Theriault, who remains a close personal friend of mine (Hey! Get your filthy heads out of the gutter!). He, privately, assured me that the Felix Trolls will play wherever they are drawn. Nobody is entitled to demand to be drawn in a specific host nation and the organizers of World Cup 68 will not be honoring any such requests. Should Felix qualify and end up drawn in the Indispensable Nation, they would be well within their rights to withdraw from the World Cup. In that case, either the Blouman Empire or the opponent of the Felix/Blouman Empire loser in the second round of playoffs would replace the Felix Trolls in the World Cup field. Should the Felix Trolls refuse to send a team to the Indispensable Nation and choose to withdraw instead, Mr. Theriault has informed me that he will actively campaign against Felix's inclusion in the Cup of Harmony and in favor of an amendment to the WCC Constitution to prohibit the Felix Trolls from entering a future World Cup. So, all I have to say to the gutless cowards in Felix who are scared of possibly visiting the Freest Nation in the Multiverse is this: Get Over It.

Nova Hellstrom is a former international soccer correspondent for Sporting World and a co-chair of the World Cup 68 Seeding Committee. She got her start covering high school soccer for the Petrograd Times before working for Sporting World. At one time, she played girls soccer for Petrograd Christian School. She was Sporting World's correspondent at the 27th Di Bradini Cup, the 52nd Baptism of Fire and during qualifying for the 65th World Cup. She has since transitioned into a successful career as a professional wrestler, where she is a multi-time World Ladies Champion in the premier wrestling organization in the multiverse, the Republican Wrestling Conglomerate. She is now a part-time professional wrestling correspondent for Sporting World.

King Petrus XX felt that Nova Hellstrom had gone too far, but he had to admit that she had a point. Indeed, her article wasn't bad, for a woman writer. He decided to show the article to his brother Andreas, who was about to head for Royal Stadium to study footage of the away leg at Jeruselem and develop a strategy for today's match. He hoped that it would provide the inspiration necessary to cast our any complacency and get the job done today. Indeed, a Sanctii victory, nil-nil draw or 1-1 draw would result in qualification to the World Cup, on away goals in the latter 2 cases. A victory would mean that the Kingdom of Saintland would be secured their place in the World Cup instead of having to compete in a second playoff, where they would face the prospect of elimination from the World Cup. While it wasn't a must-win, King Petrus XX expected his younger brother Andreas to treat it like one, as he should...

[Darmen]

Darmen finishes second, faces Schhiavonia in playoffs

While unable to surpass Barunia and claim the group title, Darmen was able to gather enough points, and goals, to finish second ahead of surprise third place Nexxus Drako. With the unique format being used this cycle, Darmen must now face Schiavonia in the first playoff round in order to advance to another playoff round in order to advance to the World Cup. Complicated, we know.

Darmen's first meeting this cycle against Nexxus Drako ended in a 3-3 draw, as did the return leg. In the first match, it was Luca Cormio with the surprise three goal performance that put Darmen ahead, although Darmen's shaky defense Lio Golt to score the winning goal in the first and only minute of stoppage time.

The next three results for Darmen were all fantastic, as expected wins against the Cabindan Free State and Braylandia gave Darmen a much needed six points in the period surrounding the mid-qualifying break. Darmen was also finally able to stop Barunia's rampage through Group 7, holding them to a 4-4 draw.

After allowing nine goals in three games, the defense would take center stage over the rest of the Group Stage, with only a slight hiccup occurring in the second match against Nexxus Drako. The back three allowed only four goals in the remaining five games, while the Darmen offense scored 11 of their own. A 0-0 draw against the Crystal Empire put a dent in Darmen's hopes to finish in second with points between them and Nexxus Drako, and the 3-3 draw against the aforementioned effectively saw that exact situation happen. But with Darmen's 3-0 win over the Cabindan Free State, and Nexxus Drako's 2-1 win over Gyatso-kai, Darmen clinched the second place finish by virtue of a better goal differential (+18 to +13).

Darmen's playoff opponent is tiny, minuscule, small, ant sized, did we mention tiny, Schiavonia, a nation with a population of only a smidgen over 700 (some estimates state 700.03, although we're not sure how it's possible to have three hundredths of a person, perhaps it looks like this), who finished third in Group 10 behind two Rushmori nations, Mytannion and Sicoutimont. Schiavonia surprisingly held its own against Darmen, as the All Greens needed to be rescued by Tor Tong Lee after going down 1-2 just before halftime. Bryan Faulkner was the other goal scorer, his goal coming off of a corner in the fifth minute. The final score was Schiavonia 2–2 Darmen. Darmen will now return to Darmen for the second leg, and will surely enjoy the home field advantage offered by the 80,000 seat plus Borg El Beat in Scott City.

Our stats people were bored, so take a look back at the All Greens previous qualifying campaigns:

WC Manager      Matches Points PPM   Goals GPM  Team MVP       World Cup Proper            Quality (PPM+GPM)
56 Thomas        14      18    1.28   17   1.21 Zach Preston   Did Not Qualify             2.49
57 Gibbons       16      25    1.56   29   1.81 Tor Tong Lee   Did Not Qualify             3.37
58 Gibbons       16      23    1.43   22   1.37 Tor Tong Lee   Did Not Qualify             2.80
59 O'Donahaue    12      25    2.08   32   2.66 Tor Tong Lee   Did Not Qualify             4.74
60 O'Donahaue    14      24    1.71   23   1.64 Tor Tong Lee   Did Not Qualify             3.35
61 O'Donahaue    16      30    1.87   47   2.94 Zach Preston   Did Not Qualify             4.81
62 O'Donahaue    14      28    2.00   42   3.00 Tor Tong Lee   Did Not Qualify             5.00
63 O'Donahaue    18      35    1.94   56   3.11 Tor Tong Lee   Did Not Qualify             5.05
64 de la Ware    18      44    2.44   66   3.66 Tor Tong Lee   Qualified-Fourth Place      6.10
65 de la Ware    18      46    2.55   48   2.66 Bryan Faulkner Qualified-Group Stage       5.21
66 de la Ware    10      30    3.00   39   3.90 Tor Tong Lee   Qualified-Round of Sixteen  6.90
67 de la Ware    16      32    2.00   39   2.44 Tor Tong Lee   Did Not Qualify             4.44
68 von Kriesler  14      29    2.07   41   2.93 TBD            TBD                         5.00
TOTAL           196     389    1.98  501   2.55                                            4.53

Darmen averages 1.98 points per game in qualifying matches, and 2.55 goals. This Qualifying Campaign also ranks as the fifth highest campaign in terms of quality, tied with World Cup 62.

[Eura]

"Suspicious circumstances" was to the Chairman's ears the penultimate nail in his coffin. The the National Centre for Aviation Incident Investigation had been leaned on by the Ministry of Transport and MoD all week to positively identify a mechanical failure or some other relatively innocent explanation for the crash. Unfortunately they had resisted pressure and published a report that did not confirm the accusations coming from Valladares, but did criticise the Euran government for being unhelpful and commented that the circumstances of the crash reflected some sort of violent attack on the plane, either from inside or outside. This had caused a frenzy at the press conference as the media hacks rushed off to their offices and studios to sensationalise as much as they possibly could.

He was now running out of options. The government was being pushed into a corner of having to make an admission that would give Crow the opportunity to dispose of the Chairman and the OSI. Therefore the Chairman had to go on one final assault; he had to bring down Crow's administration within 24 hours. Doing so would require another great gamble. The Chairman was well aware that Eura was on high military alert, with Valladares about to move on Askoy and the Euran Air Force and nuclear forces being mobilised in western Eura, along with a whole army corps in case of the unlikely event of war. What's more, the Chairman's main remaining source in the navy had informed him that naval commanders were covertly moving carrier strike groups into position to rain down hellfire on Junin and seize it if necessary, while Euran nuclear submarines had been moved into aggressive positions off the coast of Ossidiaqcua, and more of them were within striking range of the prized Westlands territory.

They were never going to be used, of course. It was all just Euran bluster in response to Valladar bluster, and so on and so forth. But the Chairman knew that if he could trigger a brief moment of panic in the Euran military and Crow's strategic plan, then Eura would be forced to at least go through the early stages of the build up to a full strike - without firing a shot - which would hopefully humiliate Crow as he would immediately be perceived as a bully. It wouldn't be good for Eura's reputation in the short term, but in the mind of the Chairman saving the OSI was far more important to Eura's interests. So he picked up the phone in his office, and rung an old friend in the business of defence related IT, to give him some 'advice'.

-------------------

Underneath a mountain near Eura's western border with Urszag-Csatoria was one of the most secretive facilities in perhaps the entire multiverse. Under hundreds of thousands of tons of concrete and rock was Euran National Command Group West, a massive underground facility that functioned as a command centre, military base, and gigantic nuclear bunker. In the war room, everything seemed to be high. Tensions were a bit higher than usual thanks to this Valladares situation, but no-one suspected anything was actually going to happen. There had been a problem with the computers though, and the Director of Systems was nowhere to be found. But it was nothing important, or at least that is what the complacent personnel thought.

Lieutenant Roberts was looking at the screen in front of her studiously as she followed the flight track of an air force Blackjack bomber, which had wandered over towards Askoy at some speed and had been raising concern. It could only be contacted through its ground base, Androse, but for some reason the army were throwing a shitfit over the place going into what seemed to be a routine training lockdown. Roberts had heard her boss behind her, General Grantley, laughing off some nonsense about a shootout at Androse. Just as she began to get out of her seat to go grab a coffee and hand over to her deputy, a ping appeared on the screen that grabbed everyone's attention. Then another. Then they started to fill up the screen. 'General? General, I've got a launch detection.' The other technicians started to call out on the tannoy about what they were seeing.
'We've got more, confirmed contacts. No malfunction?'
'No malfunction, confidence is high.'

The General looked stunned. There was no exercise due today. Roberts got out of her seat and jogged up to the General quickly. 'Sir, we've got five hundred and forty Valladar inbounds coming for us. ICBM's in the deeper territory, MRBM's deployed at the edge of their side of Askoy.'
'This had better not be a pisstake-' The General was interrupted by the Chief Co-ordinator who had just arrived. 'No sir, this is not a drill.'
'Alright, fine...we are at alert level red. Get the bombers up, and tell those subs out by the Westlands to go to standby. What are the simulations suggesting?'
'Sir, this is less than 20% of the arsenal Valladares posseses, but its high tonnage weaponry. Our predictions are the loss of at least 40% of our tactical assets unless we move now.'
'Not a disaster then?'
'Not from a military point of view, but...I mean, they're firing at our cities, sir. I recommend a full counterstrike.'

On this suggestion Grantley let out an anxious sigh and leaned back in his chair. 'This is odd. Too odd. Get me the PM on the line while you think about our strike options. Let's-'
'More launch detections!' This was unbelievable. The screens were now showing submarines of the navy of Valladares as launching a massive SLBM strike from the Endemian Ocean. 'Alright, alright. Shut the base down and go to full launch mode. I want us to be ready to go at the press of a button.'
'Sir, PM on the line.' Finally, the General thought to himself. 'Prime Minister?'
'General, I understand there's a situation.'
'Yes, Prime Minister. I uh...it makes no fucking sense to me, but we've got just under a thousand Valladar inbounds heading our way right now, according to our forward radar and satellites. I've got no confirmed reports outside of what we've got her yet of any attack. What shall we do?'
'Goddamnit. I know what this is about...General, ride out the "attack", if you could call it that. And lock down the entire facility. Nobody leaves. Anyone who is MIA is to be arrested the moment you find them.'
'Sir, I have no reason to believe this is a false positive other than my gut instinct. Are you sure?'
'I'm sure Grantley. This has happened before but not in circumstances we are used to. Stand everyone down, make a show of standing down. Ground every aircraft and pull back the Junin contingency force. Keep the subs in position, they don't know about them so there is no point pulling them back. If you don't mind, report back to me when these phantom missiles "hit" and I'll give you further instructions.'

[Polar Islandstates]

Everyone was hailing his recovery, his resurgence, his born-again renaissance, his crawl back from the depths of despair. How little they knew. The general public, even the general public that reads the sensationalist tabloid rags that had blighted his entire career with their rumours and lies, they only knew half the story. What seemed to them like a trip down a moody road with a sun-drenched recovery on the other side was painting a picture that was remarkably watered down. They seemed to want to believe that the way he was playing now was a sign that his mental health was back to normal. That everything was tickety-boo. That they didn't need to confront any demons of their own so long as their hero on the pitch was back to normal and scoring goals.

Well, tough.

They didn't know about his suicide attempt in Eastfield Lodge and as far as he was concerned he never wanted them to know. But that didn't excuse this. This opinion that everything was okay, when it wasn't. He knew his head, more so than ever before, and he knew he had an awful long way to go.

Right now however, he was holding one of his recent pay slips, sent to him by his financial advisor.

SK FRANZ JOSEF CITY ACCOUNTS DEPARTMENT
Payee: Gustaf Kolehmainen
Acct No.: 92-3462
Pay Slip: 7(7 this year)
Tax Year: 2011/12
Amount: $80,000 (EIGHTY THOUSAND SOLS ONLY)

Eighty thousand Sols.

A ridiculous amount. He didn't need that. Nobody did. He thought about his three unborn children, lost to reasons only science and religion could argue over. He thought about his ex wife. He thought about how many lives had been blown apart by the tragic events. And he had all that money just, lying there?

What a ridiculous situation.

The goals he'd scored against Barunia had brought him joy, for a short while. But it was only worth it as a distraction for as long as he was playing the game, or talking about it. That's why he needed to be playing well - so he would be playing at all. But for off the pitch, he needed something else. Something to fulfil him. Make him feel like it was all worthwhile. Worth something. Worth anything. Something good had to come of it all. He had his mental health charity now, but there was more he could do. So much more.

He lifted his phone and dialled his financial advisor.

"Hello, Frank? Hi. It's Gustaf. Listen, can you do me a favour? Search for some stillborn and miscarriage charities, yeah... like my charity, weekly, yeah. Oh, I don't know. Whittle it down. I don't need more than $5,000 after tax a week, do I? Get it down to that. Cheers. Thanks. I'll come in and see you once we're back in the capital for the return leg. Cheers. Okay, see you later."

It was a start.

[Kandorith]

Draw Leaves Kandorith In Reach

By Lisho Yaru

The thundering sounds from the stadium as Kandorith tried to secure their way into the World Cup didn't die out, but were muffled at times as Kandorith had to settle for a 3 - 3 draw against Kernansquillec in the first leg of the play-offs. The tension of Kandorith not making it or just making it is still in the air, which keeps the many fans existed for the team. With the World Cup in reach it would be the second time for the team to qualify in history, which would mean another landmark on the latest performance of the team ever since Xíanjí took charge of the national team. A miracle to some, science and statistic to others, but to the fans; a hero to the nation and a deity of football to the temple, as Xíanjí was official blessed in one of the many temples in Xiangzhou today. He is the first sportsman to be blessed by the Shengxia high priest, but certainly not the first person.


With the blessing Xíanjí said he was delighted and most honored, nor did he deserve this he added. He said that what he did was like any other person, to 'pray every night for guidance and support'' like any other ordinary Kandorese person he said. Xíanjí known for his humbleness, confidence and cool headed posture, is now the most successful sports coach in Kandorese history a second year in a row. Despite his large success he remains with two feet on the ground and told people not to cheer too far ahead, as the team has their most difficult task ahead of them still; qualifying.


With the odds still looking in favor for the national team, it all comes down to the second leg of the play-offs, where Kandorith has to snatch a win either in normal time or perhaps even in penalties. The stakes are high and the draw kept the excitement and danger of being eliminated in the atmosphere. The fans are confident Kandorith will make it to the World Cup, but this is something that still has to be done on the pitch.

[Hutt River]

Winther's non-existent public profile hadn't been achieved without effort. Quite early on in the history of Winther Investment Associates, a short time before he had become a 'business partner' with Scott and when the company had about £1.5 billion in assets, he had invited the partners of a rather obscure public relations firm around to the company's old offices and offered them a deal: £200,000 anually in return for keeping his name out of the papers. There was only one condition: if by any chance he was mentioned in the papers, he would deduct £10,000 from that fee. Mentioned more than twenty times and they'd have to start paying him. After a relatively short discussion the accepted his term, reversing all the advice they normally give to their clients. The occasional curious journalist was steered for background to the hedge fund's prime brokers, who were always happy to take the credit, or in extreme cases, to Scott.

It was therefore unusual and frankly an ordeal for Winther to attend his wife's first exhibition. The moment he stepped out of the car and into the noisy gallery across the crowded pavement, he already wished he could just turn back and stay at home. People who he assumed he's met before, probably some of Rachel's friends, loomed towards him, but despite being able to perform mental maths to a few decimal places, he had no memory for faces, a sort of social dyslexia if you will. He heard the others usual trite and pointless remarks, but didn't take them in, half consciously mumbling things in return that made no sense, and probably inappropriate. Offered a glass of champagne, he took water instead, and then he noticed Donaldson over the other side of the room. Donaldson had noticed him also, and had raised his glass in a form of greeting. Winther raised his back, despite wanting to ignore him completely. Donaldson had asked a lot of questions over the phone after the meeting that morning, and Winther was really quite annoyed with him by the end of it.

Instead of talking to anyone, Winther slinked towards the back of the room where it was a bit quieter, and less people were. He backed up against one of the only free bits of wall available to lean on and looked at the TV on the other side of the room. The 24 hour news was on, and it seemed they had moved on from the accident, probably forever unless something new came about. Winther watched as the Archregimancy saved a good header from one of the Hutt River players, presumably a defender who had gone up for a free kick or something.

He watched for a few more moments, realising he actually knew a bit about football now, before turning in search of Rachel. When he finally managed to get to her, she said, rather sulkily, "I was starting to think you weren't coming".
"I got away as soon as I could." The sourness of champagne was fresh in her mouth when he kissed her.
Someone called out, "Over here, Mr. Winther", and a flash went off less than a metre away.
Through his false smile, Winther said, "What in the world is Donaldson doing here?"
"I dunno. You invited him."
"Did I?" Winther said to her in a confused tone as the camera went away.
"'Course you did. I didn't invite him certainly. Check your sent emails, it should be in there." She was right.
"So you are. I wonder why I did that? We haven't exactly been friendly..."

Suddenly the gallery owner popped up beside him. "You must be very proud, Mr. Winther", he said.
"What?" Winther was still looking at Donaldson, who was now chatting with a group of women. "Oh yes. Yes I am. Very proud." He made a concentrated effort to put Donaldson out of his head and think of something appropriate to say to Rachel. "Sold anything yet?"
Rachel replied, "Thanks Carl, it isn't all about the money you know."
"Just asking."
"We have plenty of time yet", said the gallery owner. His mobile emitted an alert. He took it out and blinked at the message in surprise, muttered, "excuse me", and hurried away.

Winther still half blinded by the camera flash, tried to look at the portrait in front of him The centres were voids of blackness, but he still tried to make appreciative comments. "It's fantastic to see them all together isn't it? You really get another way of looking at the world. What's hidden beneath the surface."
"How's your head?" Rachel asked.
"It's fine. I haven't thought about it until you mentioned it. I like that one." Winther pointed to a nearby cube. "That's of you isn't it?"
It had taken her a day to simply sit for it, he remembered, squatting in the scanner with knees drawn up to her chest, mouth opened wide as if mid-scream. He attempted to make another comment, but the room suddenly became hushed as the gallery owner had stepped onto a raised podium on the other side of the room.
"Ladies and gentlemen. Don't be alarmed, I'm not going to make a speech. For artists, symbols are more eloquent than words." He went over to the portrait closest to Rachel and stuck a blue dot on it. An excited, knowing murmur ran across the room.
"Rachel", he said to her, "congratulations, you are now officially a professional artist." He stuck another blue dot on the centrepiece of the exhibition, which was going for £12,500.
"Any more of this and you'll be making more money than me." Winther whispered to her.
"Carl, shut up about money." But he could see that she was pleased.

If only it had stopped there, Winther thought afterwards. Instead the gallery owner had his way around the entire room, leaving blue spots in his wake. He didn't stop until all were marked as sold. The effect on the spectators was odd. First they cheered whenever one was put on, but gradually an air of awkwardness began to settle over the gallery. At the end, the owner finished his marking in complete silence. There something crushing about an excessive generosity. Winther could hardly bear to watch Rachel's expression turn from happiness to puzzlement to suspicion.
He said desperately, "It seems that you have an admirer."
She didn't seem to hear him, "This is all one buyer?"
"Indeed." The gallery owner was beaming and rubbing his hands. The muted whisper of conversation had started up, and some people were already beginning to leave, the door chime indicating whenever the door was opened. Donaldson was one of the first wave to exit.
"Who on earth is it?" Rachel said in disbelief
The owner flashed a glance at Winther before saying, "All I can say is that it's an anonymous collector."
Rachel turned to WInther. Her voice was very quiet. "Is this you?"
"Of course not."
"Because if it is..."
"It isn't! Tell her it isn't me." Winther said to the owner as more people filtered out until the room was pretty much empty apart from them three.
"I can't say who it is because I basically don't know. The bank just sent me an email that they received an electronic transfer with reference to the exhibition. I was surprised but it was exactly the amount that was required for all of them."
"I want you to pay it back" said Rachel. "I don't want my work treated like this."
The owner smiled. "My dear Rachel, you seem not to understand. In an auction the lot is sold when the hammer comes down. Same here. When it's purchased, it's gone."
"I'll pay you double, " Winther said desperately, "to give her her work back."
"Don't Carl."
"It's impossible, Mr. Winther"
"I'll double it again."
"Stop it!" Rachel shouted. "Stop it the pair of you. I can't bear to listen."

And with that, eluding Winther's outstretched arms, she darted towards the doors, pushing between the backs of the last few departing guests. Winther went after her, but by the time he had managed to get out, she had strode to the end of the street and round the corner, leaving Winther unable to comprehend the catastrophe that had overtaken him.

[Kericia]

Kericia wins 2-2

Kerician supporters knew that the chances of their team holding onto first place in Group 16 were slim at best. Just to be in such a position with four matchdays to go was a shock, so relinquishing the lead to Turori after a loss to the Eels wasn't too disappointing. Seeing the team lose their next three games, to finish the round 0-0-4, is what left fans and players with a resigned feeling heading into the playoffs. Adding to the pessimism was the fact that the Seagulls drew regional rival Vilita in the first playoff round. The Jungle Cats started their campaign well, leading Group 12 by the halfway mark. However, a string of surprising draws gave Saintland first place in the group and forced Vilita into the first playoff round.

Even with their less-than-stellar second half, the Jungle Cats were still heavily favored entering the first leg. There were more than a few Vilitans who made the trip to the Estadio Zapata to support their squad. Still, the vast majority were Kericians watching their national team compete in World Cup qualifying playoffs for the first time in decades. The two teams do have something of a history: during Kericia's first qualifying attempt, World Cup 23, one of the Seagulls' opponents was none other than Vilita. There was already a gap between the two sides by that point, as the Jungle Cats were champions of the world just three cups prior.

The playoff opener was very much back and forth, with the offensive minded Vilitans dictating the pace of play. Sirkii Moliaudo would strike first for the Jungle Cats, converting a free kick just outside the penalty box just five minutes into the match. Kerician manager Jorge Martínez motioned for his midfield to start pressing up the field, and the Seagulls duly responded in the 22nd minute. Darren Fischer continued his impressive debut with the national team by equalizing the score at one.

The Jungle Cats roared out of the halftime break and Steffyn Siazzu gave his team the lead in the 51st minute. The experienced midfielder pounced on a poor rebound by Kerician keeper Antonio Peña to give Vilita some breathing room. Vilitan hopes of an easy second leg at home were squashed when Vince Conner tied the game at two goals apiece in the 72nd minute. The match would end 2-2.

Despite the end result being equal for the two teams, emotions varied across the pitch. The Jungle Cats clearly felt they had let one get away, while the Kerician supporters sang, cheered, and saluted their unlikely heroes. The usually stoic Martínez happily greeted his players on the touchline, knowing his nation's World Cup dreams were still alive. The Kericians may need a miracle to win the return match over Vilita, who have yet to lose a match during this qualifying campaign. Scorelines in the other playoff matches have to give Seagulls fans hope, though, in which a number of highly ranked teams have suffered upsets.

[Armakistan]

Armakistan take the lead in playoff dogfight

Armakistan's Nick Kelly scored a wonder goal in the 82nd minute to give Armakistan a 1 goal lead heading into the second leg on the 1st playoff round. His perfectly executed bicycle kick on the edge of the penalty box was a majestic display of skill and highlighted Armakistan's drive and fight to make the World Cup finals on what will be their first attempt. This first cycle has already shown Armakistan to a real future force of world football. The team which came 3rd in the latest BoF competition was able to finish 3rd in their group while claiming victories against some of the big names in football such as Northern Sunrise Islands. These next 90mins of football will be crucial for Armakistan and we have been allowed to interview a few players and get an exclusive off manager Thomas Boston. Playing away from home in the second leg was never going to easy and with the non-human outfit of Equestrian States ready for revenge it is going to be a very difficult task.

Greg Daniels - Armakistan Goalkeeper

Media: So Greg after out playing one of the top keepers in the world in the first game, do you think you can pull off those heroics again?
GD: Well, Gentle Breeze is one of the best out their and I think I showed everyone that so I am. I've never been afraid of my ability and I think my performances back that up.

Media: It's only a slender lead and this is one of the top teams out there. Ranked 15th in the world these guys don't mess around.
GD: We've beat them once, we can beat them again. No team is special even these pony things.

Media: Is the fact that your opposition not human an off putting factor?
GD: Off putting? It's laughable, how are things guys even allowed to play football? In Armakistan they'd be chopped up and eaten.

Media: Wow, you might want to watch yourself out there tonight, tough fighting words. Anyway, best of luck.
GD: Yeah, whatever.

Edward Appleby - Armakistan's wonderkid

Media: Was your cross to Kelly meant for a bicycle kick?
EA: Hahahaha, no it was a poor cross to be honest I put it behind them not in front. Then again Kelly's so good I could have put it anywhere and he'd of scored. No keeper has ever stopped him. He always scores.

Media: So you trust him to help you get the win tonight?
EA: Yeah of course. It'll be tough again though. 1-0, 1-1 sort of stuff but we've got the lead. I think we can do it.

Media: So your not put off but the Equestrian State's players?
EA: Well, it's a bit different for sure but you've just got to treat them as the same as any other player. We might not have it in Armakistan but then again we don't have a lot of things in Armakistan.

Media: Best of luck tonight.
EA: Cheers

Thomas Boston - Manager

Media: Would you say this is the biggest game Armakistan has played so far?
TB: Yes of course this is the 15th best team in the world. This 2nd leg game is the biggest game we've played since the 1st leg which was the biggest in our history. In knock out football each game is bigger than the last one because you get closer to your goal and our goal is the World Cup proper.

Media: And do you have a chance?
TB: Now what sort of a manager says no to that question?

Media: One that understands that Equestrian State is 15th in the world and Armakistan is 171st?
TB: We beat them once, we can beat them again. Now unless someone has a proper question we're done here.

Media: Yes over here. What's your stance on the rumors that your opposition are neigh good?
TB: Show some respect jackass.

[Jeruselem]

Jeruselem Government News

Jeruselem world cup captain Isabella retires

Injured Jeruselem world cup player Isabella Dallas retired from all forms of football. Her recent injury put paid to her participation in the World Cup 68 and at her age, her chances of making the next one was much reduced. Interim Captain, Princess Amelia Jane Dallas, will lead the team as it is.

A sad Isabella said
"It's time to hand the torch to a younger generation. I'm definitely past my prime and I can't cope with the demands of constant travel like used to. My body says it's time to slow down. I have kids to take care off so I will still be active when I can walk properly again. Football is not a sport for old people. But without it, I'd be unable to put food on the table because it's all I know. Don't worry about me. I'll go back to being an ordinary mother. It's OK to be a mum at home."

Princess Amy paid tribute to Isabella
"She's not the type the spotlight but she gets a job done. She's got far more patience and discipline than me. Something I have to learn when I'm getting older. You may not notice her but she's always working hard for the team. She doesn't think about herself when it comes to football. She puts the team first. Obviously, the style of captaincy is going to change now. They have to put up with a tempermental bitch with a bad temper like myself but then Mum is the same so they are used to that. Isabella will be missed as she was genuine person who was like a Mum to some younger players."

Isabella is married with three children and plans the quiet life at home, although three kids doesn't make for a quiet life. She is not to be confused with Queen Isabella Michelle Dallas (Isabella I) of Jeruselem or Mayor Isabella Dallas of Tel Aviv, the former porn star who is a distant relative of her football player.

When quizzed about her kids taking up football, she said
"They love football. I encourage it. They need exercise and football teaches life skills like coping with loss, learning to be a winner, social skills, team participation and appreciating the outdoors. They aren't as talented as say a Princess Amy but then not many of us are. There's far worse sports than football a kid can take up."

[Audioslavia]

The Runners and Riders of World Cup 68
Part Nine

The two 'big' regional tournaments had a new winner each at the beginning of the cycle. Farfadillis and Mytannion in fact both added two trophies each to their respective cabinets over the course of cycle sixty-eight. Farfadillis added the AOCAF title to their victory in the Di Bradini Cup, and Mytannion managed to win both the Cup of Harmony and the Copa Rushmori.

In the hallowed grounds of Atlantian Oceania, Farfadillis claimed a deserved inaugral major championship by squeezing past Valanora in the final, after previously having fallen in two successive semi-finals, and the side have leaped into the position of fourth-favourites to take the World Cup 68 title by Audioslavian bookies.

In order to accomplish that feat, though, the side may well have to at least consider working on their defence, or at least pretending to even *have* a defence in the first place. The ultra-takil play of the Farves has accounted for many a victim and will ensure plenty of neutral spectators - on TV and in the stadium - for their World Cup matches, but their over-emphasis on attack has so often been their downfall in the past. The side have had played Audioslavia - masters of the counter-attack (or Kontrapuntzeka as its known on the island - on four occasions and have, each time, seen their forward-play chewed up in the claret and green machine and spat back out at the nearest airport, at whatever terminal is loading the next flight back to Ferdullaele.

Another obstacle the Farves may have to overcome are the dreaded Mytannion team, dreaded not only for their high level of play but also their vociferous and occasionally violent supporters. Mytannion had a torrid time in qualifying last time around, and their embarassing failure to reach the World Cup despite being a top-ten ranked nation (hi Syndi!) could have utterly broken other teams. The Mytanars, however, bounced back to sashay effortlessly to the Cup of Harmony title and, two years later, beat all-comers to lift the Copa Rushmori for the first time in their history. The next step for Mytannion has to be a proper run at the World Cup, and one feels that nothing short of a final-four appearance will satisfy the legions of Mytanar infantry. Supporters. Whatever.

Four years ago, there was a vote to decide which two nations would eschew eighteen months of competitive football in favour of a frantic scramble to build and maintain soccer stadia in their nation. Free Republics and Legalese won the vote narrowly under the competing bid of 'oh please anyone else', and so went about the process of finding not only 30 serviceable red carpets, but a means of deciding which international football teams were worthy of strolling down them while waving at photographers and trying not to trip over their pretty dresses.

Legalese had the least work to do, having previously hosted plenty of football tournaments in the past - including an AOCAF33 tournament that Audioslavia came very close to winning - and will most likely be re-using the same dozen stadiums they used for their last tournament. As for the black-clad team that usually plays in those stadiums, well, as we've said before, the Legalese national football team are prone to long periods of hibernation - years where they accomplish nothing - and only snap out of their stupor on random occasions wherein they tend to maul everything in sight and take its precious silverware. Legalese won't be favourites for the world cup - Audioslavian bookies actually forgot all about them when they put up their preliminary odds - but probably shouldn't be discounted.

Free Republics, too, were accidentally ommited from that original betting sheet, and while the Legalites laughed off their ommission as an instance of typical Audioslavian forgetfulness, those in the Free Republics were apparently not so flippant. This, of course, is the big chance for the World Changer nation to make an impact on the world scene, and the opportunity to out-perform regional rivals Saintland on the main stage is one no Republican wants to miss out on.

Ah, the Terns. Certainly the yardstick by which all modern football teams measure themselves. Except us. Audioslavians tend to view Polar Islandstates as a recently de-limbed black knight may view a trespasser. "Just a scratch" indeed. History and the KPB ranks decree that the Polarians are better than us, but our own sense of entitlement and superiority complex forces us to stand next to the broad-shouldered Valhallans and demand to know that, despite the years of thrashings, higher rank, stronger league system, bigger and better paid players and the aquaduct, what has Polarian football got over us?

Nothing. That's what.

Either way, both the Polarians and Audioslavians can lay claim, together, for defining the very era world football finds itself in. World Cup 62 was the last cup not to feature one of the two powerhouses in the final, and both nations have each won two of the five intervening regional championships. Polar Islandstates have the edge on head-to-head results, and are clearly in first place when it comes to bookies odds. Despite the return to form of Astograth and Mytannion, the emergence of the Valladar, the resurgence of the Vanor and the wary threat of Vilita, Polar Islandstates will still see themselves as favourites for the tournament. They are, simply, head and shoulders above the rest of the world.

Polar Islandstates will either win the World Cup, or someone will be made famous for scoring the goal that knocks them out.

[Farfadillis]

"So... I believe this shows we haven't really gotten rid of our irregularity yet." Rossizzo said, opening up the post-match speech with the team in the changing room. "We scored three, away from La Fantás, and conceded none against a team at seemed as difficult as Cosumar on paper." He paused. "Yet... we still somehow tied with Alsacie at home. Ah, the wonders of Farf football."

The room stayed silent. Sure, nobody was sure of why Rossizzo wasn't congratulating them as usual, but it surely wouldn't shake off how happy they were over the win. It almost secured qualifying to the next round, after all.

"Nonetheless, congratulations." He continued. "Today you played as a top ten team - the team you can be. Today you thrashed an opponent that was desperate. Desperate for not making the next match the last one. It was by no means an easy task. It was never going to be one. But you all did it just perfectly." He looked around and saw there were no reactions, at least not in the form of words. "Yet we really should learn how to play like this all the time. I seriously think it should concern us how we can never figure out how to keep our form going. We won the AOCAF Cup and then went on to have a terrible run in our qualification group, and now we managed this. It's worrying, but at the same time it gives me hope. It's like we can beat anyone and get beaten by anyone."

Everyone nodded, with many people smiling. Somehow, that was taken as something good.

"Look, I'm proud. Really proud. I'd never have imagined, even in my wildest dreams, that I'd get to manage such a talented bunch of footballers. But still, I think we should get our shit together. You know what others think of us? That we are that irregular team that sometimes does wonderfully and some other times does horribly. We are always 'on the rise'. We seem to go on a predictable cycle of success, averageness, failure, averageness and then success again. Do you all want to be the guys on the rise? Don't you all want to... finally... actually rise?"

They all looked serious now, most of them frowning, though it was barely noticeable in most cases.

"I'll take that as a yes. Well, the solution is pretty simple. You've all got the potential, and the entire world has figured out as much already. We've just got to keep performing like this. We've got to be the AOCAF Cup winners, not the Samebans' competitors. The past is in the past, guys. Please only look forward from now on. We've got another match before we find out about our next opponents. Please don't be overconfident. This could be the Ossidiacquans' last match for all they know. They'll be out for our heads. Let's go out for theirs too. Next time, I don't want to be 'on the rise' anymore, understood?"

"Understood." Replied most of them with a vital tone. Rossizzo smiled.

"Good then. Let's get going."

[Sandwich Territories]

"And the game finishes 2-1, and the Sandwichians fall behind in the 1st leg. They must now go to enemy headquarters to pull off the win, and advance."

"Yes, they surely have a lot of work to make up Paul, and they are lacking match fitness it seems....some of them looked like snails out there."

"Absolutely William, I saw some of that myself, and I can't say I am surprised...after what was said about mental fitness, it seems to me they might not have gotten in enough shape physically."

"The rope-a-dope attempts, as best as I can call it, to defend were doomed to fail....after all, this is not boxing...."

"Exactly....the defensive efforts were too conservative and one can only wonder how no Sandwichians got more physical and aggressive on the opposing strikers..."

"And I can only imagine how Max is feeling....I wonder if he too is confused about how things have gone."

"The rest of the team looks it. They need to get their bearings down quickly or their chances of going further will not materialize."

"You can't expect to put yourself in a losing position to win in football...did they expect for that to work?"

"I doubt it, I think it was another tactical error, and needs to stop now."

"Right now Paul. They have no more chances to try and regain composure, and to fix anything that hasn't been working, they just need to play their hearts out tonight."

"And if anything, maybe they can take pride in knowing that the nation is behind them all the way, through triumph and defeat."

"Always loyal Paul.....always loyal."

[San Jose Guayabal]

www.elnacional.gu/sports/highlights

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NEWS
- Filopines 1-4 SJG, A very important win
- SJG vs Filopines, Let's secure the result.

Lourdes Amador
Follow in Socialité as: @Loudor1441
April 11th, 2014. 7:30 A.M.

Filopines 1-4 SJG, A very important win

Previous details

SJG yesterday achieved a valuable victory in their aspirations to remain in contention at the stage of the WC 68 playoffs , beating Filopines 1-4 in visitor status, putting them in a good condition to face the next game in town of Yucuaiquín where the stadium will be packed to see that all-important second leg.

In yesterday's game, played at the Corsley stadium before a fan base of 104,098 among which arrived about 4,600 fans from SJG for the game, where it was shown to the fans in a very lively and a colorful environment for both fan sides, the fans arriving early in the morning to reserve his seats in the stadium in order to watch the game from the best place possible.

Tactical details and first minutes

At a tactical level, the team led by Emanuel Inzer and Mathias Paatelainen, lined up in a very conservative, very careful especially with the defensive zone because it is a game where an opponent was found whose vocation was to attack from the start and seek to strengthen the game in his favor and give both an important step in the series, so SJG had chosen his usual starting lineup with a little more emphasis on defense, attack without neglecting the national team. On the side of the opposing team, Sierra Haleze young coach with a lot of talent as we talk about strategy aligned to a purely offensive starting lineup, whose advantage were quick transitions between defensive plays to the attack taking advantage of the speed of Marcos Cabañas and the experienced Aaron Bolbing, who with Stephen Cayley tried and sought to generate damage SJG defense throughout the game, which was forecast to be analysis and understanding by both teams.

When starting the first time, the predictions failed because Filopines started with the ball in his favor , generating moves very fast attack they were putting in some difficulty to Henry Hernández. In the fifth minute of the match, showed his agility Marcos Cabañas at dribble two SJG defenders and hold the ball in the corner and then centered a pass to Aaron Bolbing who managed to give a header and put pressure on Henry Hernandez, who had to stretch his arms desperately to avoid an early goal of the opponent, who showed with some pressure from the fans, who wanted his team to give an important step in this playoff series.

In the eleventh minute of the match, SJG began to generate his first occasion on the goal defended by Kenneth Nolder all started through a series of passes between Rodolfo Zelaya and Árbol Saucedo, where Saucedo to finish off the move with Zelaya, was encouraged to shoot from outside the box, sending the ball over the opponent's goal.

Up and tied

Seventeen minutes, Sebastián Núñez launched an excellent counterattack from the left side then gave pass to Sean Fraser who approached the opponent's area, trying to shoot at goal but his shot was blocked by Jason Dayly and subsequently appeared Jonathan Faña who took advantage of the rebound to take the ball and take the pressure off an opponent and the goal of Kenneth Nolder who was defeated by the Faña shot that was introduced in the lower left corner of the goal, and so SJG scored the 0-1 which was a motivating goal for SJG then got the initial goal of completing a goal in visitor status, something that can be useful if needed.

From that goal, SJG was more consolidated and tactical and some mood to rival, in twenty-four minutes, Sean Fraser narrowly achieved the second goal, as an additional maneuver cost him a great opportunity to a Kenneth Nolder was already literally beat. And in twenty-eight minutes Filopines was very insistent to generate opportunities on the goal of Henry Hernandez and eventually paid off, as Luis Rodríguez gave a very precise centering pass towards the head of Aaron Bolbing who remato of head and beat Henry ontundente Hernandez in a form and thus decreed the 1-1 draw in the match, that being a time of uncertainty for SJG who was at the height of the match, as the rival he was very offensive because he sought to take advantage of its status of Local in a effective way.

Up again and the halftime

SJG seemed emotionally crumbled with the equalizer by Filopines, far from being satisfied with the goal in his favor began to create more chances, in thirty-three minutes, Shaun Albrecht managed to sneak between several defenses to SJG take a shot that narrowly enters into the goal defended by Henry Hernandez who was reacting appropriately to put in some occasions that embarrass their target. Thirty eight minutes SJG started getting a breath of fresh air through a header by Sean Fraser did not cause greater difficulty Kenneth Nolder, that then Kenneth Nolder cleared and Marcos Cabañas gave a pass to Aaron Bolbing who remato from distance to Hernández send a corner, then Hernandez stopped a header and a rear kick of Stephen Cayly , who missed a clear opportunity for his team, after that Cayley was shown forty minutes for a strong sweep to Leonidas Bregoo, who had to be replaced by Oliver Ábrego instead him.

Forty-two minutes into the match, Oliver Ábrego touched the ball for the first time, giving a pass to Jonathan Faña who then managed to slip between three defenders, to go to the corner area to give a pass to Sean Fraser who jumped easily without difficulty despite a fixed pressure by Ross Hart, Fraser then scored the 1-2 for SJG, was shown in excellent condition after that goal which helped expand the away goals account for SJG, something favorable to the interests of the " Selecta SJG " .

Subsequently, Filopines have one last chance in the second minute of extra time, where Stephen Cayley squandered a golden opportunity to score the 2-2, after staying in front of Henry Hernandez in a duel in which he sent the ball Cayley one corner of Hernandez, with this game the first half ended with the score 1-2 in favor of SJG.

In the typical halftime talk in the change room, Emanuel Inzer and Mathias Paatelainen asked his players to play in a more offensive way in order to achieve better results and try again later the score for SJG other than make two substitutions: James Moreira entered instead Daniel Coco and Marcos Haedo instead of Darwin Ceren. Meanwhile in the change room of the home team, Sierra Haleze called for calm his team, as well as emphasizing the importance of ensuring a good result for them in front of their fans, so another goal of SJG would put in trouble by Haleze asked that their players a more conservative style game and help them to achieve a tie or the comeback in front of their fans and so railroaded the series in its favor.

The consolidation

The second half of the game started with a good command of the ball on for SJG , who was trying to get even more difference in their favor during the second time through stationary ball moves or passes through filtered through solid defense and counterattacks the sides of the pitch, in fifty-two minutes, Marcos Haedo missed a kick in front of the goal to Kenneth Nolder who briefly looked at the need to go pick up the ball for the third time in the match at the bottom of the goal. Filopines watching would not appropriated SJG game actions, for fifty-nine minutes , Jack Harodzic finished from distance and his shot bounced off the crossbar, then Aaron Bolbing to send the ball into the hands of Henry Hernández, in what may have been clear to the equalizer Filopines.

After a period of sixty seven minutes, the possession of the ball was shown in favor of SJG by 53 % and 47 % for Filopines but the home had more shots on goal (five) against four of SJG, although that's SJG constant approximations provided a little more edge in your favor as we refer to certain attack.

More goals, please.

Seventy minutes, Rodolfo Zelaya was fouled on the outside of the box, Mark Viney was shown the yellow card due to lack Tree Saucedo finished in the foot, sending the ball into the goal from Kenneth Nolder, who by bit prevents its entry into the goal , but placed in a low power shot, was enough for SJG is further lead after the score was now winning by 1-3 and had accumulated another goal in visitor status.

Seventy-seven minutes, received a yellow card Saucedo Tree for having abruptly swept Shaun Albrecht in a clear scoring opportunity , winning free throw to Filopines, Albrecht gave Marcos Cabañas a pass who hit the goal but the ball pass over the I goal defended by Hernandez , who was unable to due to poor vision that allowed his defensive wall.

Eighty-six minutes, Rodolfo Zelaya managed to control the ball through a collective move with Sean Fraser, who gave him the ball in front of the keeper Zelaya to define just placing the ball past the keeper and so Zelaya scored the Final 1-4 to SJG, who achieved an excellent result in visitor status, something that will certainly help SJG in great shape in the second leg here in the city of Yucuaiquín.

SJG vs Filopines, Let's secure the result.

In the next game, SJG seek to consolidate their success in visitor status , this time planning to make a great performance at home to his audience in the stadium "Land of Fire " in the city of Yucuaiquín, where a crowd of fans expected from early to support the national team in a great shape from early hours.

At a tactical level, and Emanuel Inzer Mathas Paatelainen seek to achieve an excellent result, because despite having won away in good shape not relax, because a mistake can cost a lot, so that will be played with the same lineup with a offensive strategy, which will try to win the game early, while Sierra Haleze not give up with your team, hoping to trace the adverse score, but is aware of how difficult it will be, so your team will play in a vocational maner to the attack, so that a good match is expected.

Tune this match on channel seven, at 8:15 pm or buy tickets at the stadium , are now 15% off of what is usually worth.

[Schiavonia]

" The sound here at The Field could easily be thirty thousand Schiavonia fans. But there aren't thirty thousand Schiavonia fans, just ten percent of that. But they are getting behind their team, as they lead Darmen two-one."

"COME ON SLOTHS!!!"

"Kev, you're supposed to be more level-headed than that, as the Sloths attack again through Sanderson, plays a ball through to Blige, tries a lay-off to Chester, but intercepted by Adan for Darmen."

"So are Darmen related to Darvale who we played in the group stage?"

"No. They just both begin with "Dar"."

"Oh. They're not even close?"

"They're even in different regions. Darvale are from Tychrome, Darmen are from Rushmore."

"Like Rushmori Pingu."

"What on earth is Rushmori Pingu?"

"It's a cartoon show thing. About a little penguin that goes around having adventures with his friends."

"A children's show."

"I'll have you know that Rushmori Pingu is my favourite TV show!"

"It's for children, Kev."

"No, it isn't! There was one on yesterday! Oh my... *chuckles* ...this was brilliant! Pingu had smuggled a fish into his room and his mum kept trying to find it. It was hi-larious!"

"What was so funny about it?"

"Well... fish... hiding it..."

"I don't get it."

"You know... hiding things... the smell of fish..."

"No. Not at all. Although, here's a fact about Darmen and Schiavonia - Darmen currently has the largest domestic football league system in the multiverse, and Schiavonia has the smallest."

"How many teams have they got?"

"More than anyone has kept count with!"

"Wow! How many have we got?"

"Two. You know that. Yellow Stars and Monarchs."

"I think I did know that, didn't I?"

"Anyway, this is a good move from Darmen. Turko, outside to Salapu, crossed in, Faulkner nods it down, but Lyku clears. Only as far as Lee, who tries to hit a shot, blocked by Cueto... the referee has given a free-kick. I think it is for handball, which seemed harsh, but it means that Lee will get another go at the shot."

"It seemed very harsh."

"It did indeed. And so now O'Connor is lining up his wall..."

"So what happened with the Cafundélese Schiavones?"

"I'm sorry... is this the best time to ask, Kev? Just as Darmen are lining up a free kick."

"Well, it just reminded me of it."

"How?"

"Well, the fact that the wall were being lined up, and walls are used to make buildings."

"And what has that got to do with it?"

"Well..."

"Lee hits the shot... into the top corner! Great free kick from Lee! Two-each, and the Darmen half of the crowd go wild!"

"That was pretty impressive. Even some of the Schiavone fans are clapping. It was a good hit that."

"It certainly was, and that second away goal has got to put Darmen in the driving seat now."

"So, what news is there?"

"News?"

"With the Caf..."

"Oh, that. Well, there is going to be a referendum about the whole thing."

"What, we're having one?"

"And they are."

"And the Garundis?"

"Well, they don't really know what's going on, do they?"

"But they're as Schiavone as us."

"No, they're not. They've been on the island for a matter of weeks. It takes longer than that to sort all of the paperwork out. International law can be a pain in the neck sometimes."

"Ah, OK."

"And the ones that used to be in Cafundéu?"

"They're having a vote, too. To see if they want to join us."

"But what happened to all of the Cafundélese people?"

"Well... that's a good question. I'm sure we'll find out in due course."

"Like with what happened with the Schiavones in 148?"

"I guess it must be a bit like that, yes."

"OK. You know, there are some things about this multiverse that I just don't understand."

"Well, there are theories. When a nation ceases to exist, all of the people from the nation cease to exist in this multiverse with them. They then exist in a parallel multiverse that houses them all until the nation reappears and, ergo, so do the people. But sometimes, changes can happen, and the people involved get lost in the void between multiverses, as when Schiavonia was reformed with hundreds instead of millions."

"What? I just meant how different nations have different ways of giving years numbers."

"Oh, yeah. That, too."

[Nexxus Drako]

We lost. 6-3. At home. To a nation who is classed as average.

We were devastated, we were anxious, we were crying in the streets, but no more. Now is the time for Nexxus Drako to stand up, take back what is ours. We must win, by four or more goals, for we must show these people what we are worth, and even if we don't, we still have the Cup of Harmony, which we will get far, we can promise that!

Even if we don't make it to Legalese and the Free Republics, we can still make it to Kazamatsuri and Kinitaria! FOR WE ARE NEXXUS DRAKO!

WE ARE UNITED, WE ARE GREAT, WE ARE NEXXUS DRAKO!

[Vilita]

V is for Victory

Jungle Cats Buck history with early results

It was all starting off too perfectly for the Vilita Jungle Cats. There was always supposed to be a defeat - always a let down to start the campaign. They had to get it out of their system at that point. Not a draw against a team one seed away. Not that kind of let down. More of a draw against an unranked, or a defeat against a nation that doesn't exist.

Thats the kind of let down the Vilita Jungle Cats are used to at the start of a World Cup Qualification campaign.

So when that let down doesn't come, and doesn't come early, it starts to leave the fans very nervous.

At what point are their Jungle Cats going to collapse? At what point is the rug going to be pulled out from under their feet?

They knew it would happen, they just didn't know when.

Matchday 4 against Vettrera would have been a great time for it to happen. It was still early enough that it would seemingly still count as the Jungle Cats sacrifice to Margaret. Plus, it would at least come at the benefit of a nation doubly neighborly to Vilita. Of course, Vettrera had their loose ties to Atlantian Oceania, but they were also a member of the Verilous V's. Vilita. Vephrall. Valanora. Ok, so they hadn't quite reached the top tier yet, but they still had a V, and that had to be worth something.

So if Vilita had to drop points, why not do it against Vettrera?

Well, no one told that to 16 year old UICA Globe Cup winner Tripate Falcon. Making his international debut in the World Cup 68 qualifying campaign, Falcon didn't waste much time getting onto the scoresheet, putting Vilita up 1-0 after just five minutes of play.

Any hopes of an in-game collapse were lost when Sirkii Moliaudo, Falcon's Cednia Beach AFC teammate, netted the Jungle Cats second goal about 10 minutes later.

Jungle Cat fans were getting very nervous. Could this be the Vilitan team that bucks the trend and finishes an entire qualifying campaign with no major set backs? It hardly seemed likely, but that train just kept on rolling.

There was a minor set back for Vilita, in the space of 10 minutes goalscorer Falcon and experienced striker Kristofer Kilpter both left the match with injuries, being replaced by Viela Lianksa and Nili Ylimaiina respectively.

Though unfortunate, the injuries didn't slow the Jungle Cats down and Ylimaiina quickly got into the thick of things setting up Adjei for Vilita's 3rd.

When the dust settled after Moliaudo's second goal, Vilita had come away 4-1 winners and the only negative to take away from the performance was that legendary goalkeeper Nycflala Kater let in a soft goal to Drake Keele as the match was already out of reach.

It was a scary position for the Jungle Cats to be in. 4 Matches in and all four results well within the margin of error of the form book. Which was simply not to form for the Vilitan National Team. Something had to give. The question was what, and when.

	Vettrera
:: Goalscorers :: :: 5' Tripate Falcon :: 16' Sirkii Moliaudo :: 29' Lita Adjei :: 54' Sirkii Moliaudo	:: Goalscorers :: :: 69' Drake Keele :: :: ::
:: Best Player: Lita Adjei :: Worst Player: Nycflala Kater :: Shots on Target: 11 :: Corner Kicks: 14	:: Best Player: Drake Keele :: Worst Player: ReMarcus Potter :: Shots on Target: 3 :: Corner Kicks: 7

Vilita Jungle Cats ::
[GK] Nycflala Kater, [D.] Kadi Molali, [D.] Miiara Makose, [D.] Arocki Tadalek, [ML] Jomur Hulyer, [MC] Tripate Falcon, [MC] Riksa Valjariia, [MR] Steffyn Siazzu, [FC] Lita Adjei, [FC] Sirkii Moliaudo, [FC] Kristofer Kilpter
BENCH::
[FC] Lboaisa Akarelm, [FC] Nili Ylimaiina, [M] Kiroki Mitaroka, [M] Vliela Lianksa, [U] Lopaki Kilpter, [D] Amarini Baracelv, [GK] Jaqe Planst

Vilita & Turori Substitutions::
(20) - Tripate Falcon >>> Vliela Lianksa
(28) - Kristofer Kilpter >>> Nili Ylimaiina
(72) - Kadi Molali >>> Amarini Baracelv

(For Future Statistical Reference)
GK:: Nycflala Kater - [5]

D.:: Kadi Molali - [9]
D.:: Miiara Makose - [7]
D.:: Arocki Tadalek - [7]
ML:: Jomur Hulyer - [4]
MC:: Tripate Falcon - [5]
MC:: Riksa Valjariia - [7]
MR:: Steffyn Siazzu - [9]
FC:: Lita Adjei - [7]
FC:: Sirkii Moliaudo - [7]
FC:: Kristofer Kilpter - [6]

Vilitan Subs Bench:
FC:: Lboaisa Akarelm - [DNP]
FC:: Nili Ylimaiina - [6]
M:: Kiroki Mitaroka - [DNP]
M:: Vliela Lianksa - [6]
U:: Lopaki Kilpter - [DNP]
D:: Amarini Baracelv - [6]
GK:: Jaqe Planst - [DNP]

[Equestrian States]

I should preface this RP by stating that I had already begun writing this before the current mess on the WCDT started, and that I did receive permission to use Saintland's character from him via TG.

Ponies See Red in Controversial Defeat
by Steve McNotapony

Armakistan 1-0 Equestrian States
at Marston Arena in Victoria, Armakistan
Attendance: 62,047
Scoring:
Bobby Bell '45+7 (Unassisted)

VICTORIA, Armakistan - If a team ranked 171st in the world beats one ranked 15th, it would normally be considered an upset. However, last night's match was not what I would consider an upset, as when one side has four players sent off and another forced off by injury, the outcome is never really in doubt.

When Equestrian supporters found out that Sanctii referee Lucius Caeparius would be officiating the Ponies' first leg match, the average reaction was one of outrage. Caeparius, a known speciesist, was heavily criticized by the media and members of the Equestrian team after a qualifying match in which he seemed determined to make the Ponies lose to their opponents. It was with full knowledge of his bias that the Republican organizers of the World Cup arranged for him to be referee of the Armakistan-Equestrian States opener. The supporters braced for the worst, the HA prepared a formal protest, and the media broke out the torches and pitchforks, but nobody expected what was to come.

Just two minutes after the start of the game, Flitter was issued a yellow card for visibly expressing her disagreement with a highly-questionable foul, drawing a chorus of boos from the Equestrian contingent present in the stadium. Seven minutes later, the star Equestrian defender was shown another yellow for a tackle near the middle of the field which most Equestrian referees would consider a fairly harmless foul. As Flitter walked off the pitch, her teammates glared at the smug-looking Caeparius, Andrea Molovi the only one willing to risk a booking by speaking her mind to the Sanctii referee. To the surprise of nobody, the yellow card came out yet again for the third Equestrian booking in the first nine minutes of the match.

Meanwhile, knowing she needed another player in the back to replace Flitter, head coach Twilight Striker made a quick substitution, bringing on experienced defender Subtle Trix while reluctantly pulling Starlight Sparkle out. While a good result would be difficult to manage with fewer players, it was far from impossible given the quality of the Equestrian. The Ponies' loyal supporters remained confident even with Caeparius' history of poor officiating and apparent determination to give the Equestrian States a very hard time.

The match continued with the Equestrian States being on the wrong end of questionable call after questionable call. Thunderlane, Cloudchaser, and Apple Jack were all shown yellow cards before the match was even a half hour in, with Apple Jack given another in the 39th minute that sent him to the locker room early. In response to the latest sending-off, Twilight Striker subbed out her booked striker in favor of talented defender Brix Hamilton in the hopes of at least preventing Armakistan from scoring.

However, in what is destined to be one of the (if not the) most controversial moments in Equestrian hoofball history, Caeparius gave an unbelievable five minutes of extra time at the end of the half. But when those five minutes were up, Caeparius refused to bring an end to the half, not once looking at his watch. This allowed Armakistan one last chance to score after a foul just outside the box (that also saw Hamilton booked) granted them a short-range free kick. Up stepped Bobby Bell to take the kick. The shot was fired, smashed straight down off the post, hitting the ground close to (but not quite over) the goal line. Gentle Breeze quickly pounced on the loose ball, determined to prevent the Armakistanis another chance, yet something was not quite right. Somehow, Lucius Caeparius had seen fit to rule the ball over the line, giving Armakistan a one goal lead over the Ponies. Brushing aside any and all protests, Caeparius returned the ball to the middle of the field where just seconds later he blew his whistle to end the half.

After the break, the Equestrian players returned to the pitch still visibly incensed over the "goal" gifted to their opponents by the referee. Five minutes into the second half, Andrea Molovi was shown a second yellow by Caeparius for an admittedly rough tackle. Knowing what was sure to come next, the defender turned to head off the pitch, nut the red card stayed in Caeparius' pocket. He had apparently forgotten about the first yellow he had given her and, not one to point out the referee's mistake, Andrea stayed on. A few minutes later, Molovi was shown an improbable third yellow card for allegedly diving when tackled from the back by an Armakistani midfielder. This time, Caeparius remembered the Equestrian's previous booking and sent her off, though Andrea Molovi was seen laughing as she walked into the tunnel.

Down to 8 players with no substitutions left after bringing Elaine Everdeen at halftime on to keep Krystal from an unwanted second yellow. Twilight Striker was left in a difficult position when Fire Dash, the lone Equestrian striker still on the field was carried off with a leg injury after a spectacularly bad tackle finally forced Caeparius to book a player in a non-orange jersey. Rainbow Blitz moved up to take the place of the wounded Equestrian team captain, but could do little on the attack with just seven other players. Armakistan pressed their advantage as far as they could, firing shot after shot at an increasingly-tired Gentle Breeze. A straight red card given to Subtle Trix in the dying minutes of the match would prove to be the final booking of the day from Caeparius, and the final whistle was met by a torrent of jeers and insults from the Equestrian supporters.

One has to give credit to the Ponies for an outstanding performance despite being outnumbered by a sizable margin. The HA has already submitted formal protests against the automatic suspensions of the four players sent off in the first match of this two leg series. One can only assume they will be rescinded due to their questionable, but if they are upheld the Equestrian States will face a must-win match without four of its starters as Fire Dash has been ruled out for at least two weeks with a pulled muscle. To Lucius Caeparius, I have just one thing to say:

Good luck ever getting a match outside your home region ever again, because you just destroyed whatever credibility you still had left.

---

Match Report :: Runners Up Playoff, Leg 1

 ARMAKISTAN 1-0 EQUESTRIAN STATES 
Marston Arena (cap. 60,000) in Victoria, Armakistan

Scoring:
 Bobby Bell '45+7 (Unassisted)

Starting XI:
GK - Gentle Breeze
DF - Flitter
DF - Andrea Molovi
DF - Blackmane
MF - Starlight Sparkle
MF - Rainbow Blitz
MF - Cloudchaser
MF - Apple Jack
MF - Krystal
FW - Fire Dash
FW - Thunderlane

Substitutions:
 Subtle Trix in for Starlight Sparkle '10
 Brix Hamilton in for Thunderlane '41
 Elaine Everdeen in for Krystal '45